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ID Title Author Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication) STC Words Pages
A43173 Proteus redivivus, or, The art of wheedling or insinuation obtain'd by general conversation and extracted from the several humours, inclinations, and passions of both sexes, respecting their several ages, and suiting each profession or occupation / collected and methodized by the author of the first part of the English rogue. Head, Richard, 1637?-1686? 1675 (1675) Wing H1272; ESTC R13684 160,760 370

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parts for no other reason but because he finds it a difficult thing to circumvent them Every mans happiness he measures by their Mony and therefore nick-names Thrive-well to do well and Preferment he profanely calls the Grace of God He knows no other content than when his Plots hit right purchasing him Mony Gallantry and the variety of Town-pleasures at these Marks all his Studies aim at and he holds as an idle thing all other speculation Thus much of the Wheedle in general I shall more at large Characterize or Paint him in his proper Colours when I shall treat of the several sorts of Wheedles or Town-shifts in the variety of their Mysterious Practices and Devices CHAP. IV. What are the Praecognita or things first necessary to be known before the Student in this Art of Wheedling enter upon the Practice of the Profession I Have in the foregoing Chapters given you an Account of the Nine first requisite Qualifications of our Wheedle in the next place I shall endeavour to discover what other things he consults for his Advantage before he puts in practice his Art of Insinuation which indeed are the principal discoverers in the profitable Science of reading or knowing Men. Man is a difficult Book to be read if we only take an outward view of his Person and Actions for without much caution and circumspection they may both prove dangerously deceitful though it 's said That the Face is the Index of the Mind yet Experience tells us it is no infallible Indicium of the Nature or Disposition of the Person For which cause Socrates would not believe his own Eyes but his Ears rather for when a Youth was highly commended to him for his excellent Parts and great endowments of Mind he did not pry into his outward Feature which was admirable and needed not to have demurred his approbation of him if that lovely hew and sweet countenance would have done it but took a contrary way by asking him Loquere puer ut te videam which Seneca alluded to in one of his Epistles Videre non eloqui nec videre est which puts me in mind of an Italian Proverb A Lucca te vidi a Pisa te conobbi I saw thee at Lucca I knew thee at Pisa he had an external superficial View of him at one place but by converse he gain'd an inward acquaintance with him in another Yet it must nor be denied but that the Eye is the Casement of the Soul through which we may plainly see it as one lately saw the Pride of a Rich Phanatick through his thread-bare holy Cloak as he was going to a Conventicle upon one of his own Solemn Days of Humiliation The Tongue is the truest Touchstone of the Heart and Herauld of the Mind but not always for what is more deceitful and treacherous than it how sweetly will it Wheedle to obtain its end lye and flatter to propagate Interest and hath so full a command and power over the Heart that it can utter nothing without her assistance and when the Tongue pleaseth will corruptedly speak what the Heart dictated Again as one well observes all is not Gold that glisters and it was well observed by a Philosopher concerning a young man that was well proportioned and spoke ill a Leaden Rapier in a Golden Sheath Nero's Beard in a Golden Box wrinkled Faces and rugged Brows lurk under smooth Paint a rotten Nutmeg gilt over or a gaudy outside with a Baudy rotten inside an old deformed Woman in a New-fashion'd Gown yet on the other side when we see a Body well framed as wrought out of the purest Virgin-wax as tempered with the cunning hands of beauty and favour enriched with the very prodigality of Nature shall we say this golden Mine affords only leaden Metal This is no wonder no rare thing to see Wit Wisdom and Virtue in fellowship or in one House-hold with Beauty wherefore we must not censure too far by the outward resemblance or else to instruct knowledge it self in this That always to see is not to know Neither can any see the Deformity of the Soul by the blemishes of the Body not but that a man may give a shrewd conjecture and many a hanging look hath presaged his certain going to the Gallows some years before the approach of that sad Catastrophe I cannot deny but that we may gather something from outward appearances for men largely sized are seldom witty Men we find little Eyes in men betoken crafty and circumventing Dispositions in Women salacity or lechery with an obstinate selfish humour a great head a small wit goggle eyes a stark staring fool great ears a dull heavy Ass large breasted long liv'd a plain unfurrowed brow liberal thick nails harsh hair and a gross hard skin are certain signs of a dull understanding a fat belly bespeaks a little ingenie because the subtile Spirits are affected with gross and turbulent Fumes which darken the understanding Fat Panches make lean Pates and grosser bits Enrich th' Ribs but Bankrupt quite the Wits This will not hold good if you examin the great Wit notwithstanding the corpulent Body of Doctor R. W. Now since these are no certain Signs which may direct us to the knowledge of Mankind let us consider what other helps remain which I find to be four very important and necessary to be understood by all the Students of this Art or Science viz. The four Temperaments or Humours Inclinations Passions and Conversation of these I shall speak in order CHAP. V. Of the four Principal Humours or Complexions Of the Sanguine ALL Natural Bodies have their composition of the mixture of the four Elements Fire Air Water and Earth from the Dominion of any of these or their qualities each Temperament or Constitution hath its Denomination thus Sanguine hath its original from Air Choler from Fire Phlegm from Water and Melancholy from Earth now the Blood is hot and moist Choler hot and dry Water cold and moist the Earth cold and dry The golden Crasis or Sanguine Complexion is as T. W. describeth it at large with much Learning and Rhetorick The Pride of Humours the Paragon of Complexions and the Prince of all Temperaments And as a Potentate he continues his Metaphor thus You cannot but admire him if you view him in those Princely Scarlet Robes he is always invested with seated in a Kingly Throne and placed in the midst of our Earthly City next take notice of his Officers I mean the Veins and Arteries which are spread throughout his whole Politeia yea dispersed in every Angle to execute his Commands and carry the lively influence of his goodness reviving those remote parts which without his influence would be frettished with a chilness and in a short time be mortified Then consider his wise subtle Counsellors which daily consort with him for the welfare of his whole Kingdom the limpid Spirits the very seat of Divine reason it self the fountains of Policy c. If we poize all
it by making it after it is eaten to swim in good Canary much better Housewifery in the Mistress if she had allowed them two pounds of Butter to three Sprats and so have pleas'd them than to be at that expence It is now high time to speak a little of the Vintners Wheedle in his Guests If he be wise and crafty for his own ends he must be all submission to the Velvet-Coat Pantaloon or splendid Thing that is in fashion and make a noise with his Bell and Mouth as if the house were all in Flames the one jangling to alarm the people and his mouth speaking nothing but Tom Will John show a Room which because it cannot be heard by the insufferable noise of the jarring Bell one would think he call'd out for Buckets and water to quench the Fire The noise somewhat allay'd he begins again with his feet and hasty running up that he may have the first honour to serve the Gentlemen with bad Wine having more authority to brazen it out with a lye his hat is under his Arm and understanding what Wine it is they will drink he instantly swears they shall not drink better Wine in London though they cannot drink worse elsewhere and it may be puzzle a good judgment whether it be Wine or no. Their Palats being displeas'd the Master in all haste is called for whose place is supply'd by John who cringingly desires to know their Worships pleasure understanding thev dislike the wine he then asks what fault they find with it to no other intent than to try their judgments if they want Vintners terms and say the Wine is sweet he streight way cries I will draw you greener Gentlemen if they say it is sour he then proposeth Richer but if they say it is foul for no benefit to himself and little to his Master he mortgages his Soul to the Devil by swearing damnedly there is not a cleaner piece of Wine between Aldgate and Westminster however he will change it if they please 't is done and somewhat better than the former yet not so good but that the Master must be call'd up again who excusing himself that he is very busie doing nothing at length comes up and delivering a Key which never belong'd to any Lock of his knowledge to his servant in their sight bids him bring up a Bottle of that Wine which is to be sent in to his Grace the Duke of-this must take or else the Devils in 't sometimes he bids the Drawer go to the Third next the wall and though it be a common draught the Faucet shown in the mouth must evince the contrary and so between the Master and the Man it is well if the Guest drinks one third of Wine that is tollerable and if you have a good farewel at last you must not thank the kindness of the house so much as the Drawers expectation of a Six pence or the evening of the reckoning I shall say nothing of his large Bills nor his dark working in his Vaults and Cellars where he so subtlely plays the Brewer that Anniseed Cleer had never Combatants about her ne're half so crafty in their Art of composition the sending Mum to Sea brew'd at St. Katherines to purge it self and so come in for Mr. Brumswick is a meer Bauble to this profound Mystery Now since it is impossible to detect the Art and Mystery of a Vintner but indifferently without serving a time to the Profession and that those who have served two Apprentiships are still Novices in their own Trade I shall leave them amongst their Cans Tubs Casks Cranes Bellows c. and being in the dark groap my way up stairs and creep into the Bar which shall be the subject of my next observation The Daughter or Kinswoman which is handsomest of the two is Bar-keeper which frequently proves more beneficial to the house within than the entising Signe without and yet both use the same artifices of painting to allure and delude yet differ very much in their composition and substance the one being a gravid heavy body supported by almost a rising Constables estate in Iron work the other is it may be gravid too yet very light whom a Feather placed in the contrary scale will weigh down and not blush at it and yet her cloaths in her finery is sold to the best advantage would amount to a portion fit for a Country Bride and raise her husband if a Citizen to a large fortune In the Bar she sits with much accustomed patience and her good face and cloaths angles for all sorts of customers whilst her eyes are groaping for Trouts whom she intends to tickle for her own particular advantage All in civility lowr their Top-sail as they pass by her but if with the usuall welcome she bestows on them a gracious and pleasant Smile though under Sail in a stiff gale this is the Remora that stops the Vessel and makes it ride per force without dropping Anchor Where there is a noted Beauty a Bar-keeper she draws custom from all parts of the Town as cunning Pidgeon Merchants with baits store their own Dove-coats from other mens and at length engross more of that commodity than they know well what to do with In the forenoon she is retired to be the better attired and when best drest she shows her willingness to be undrest and cares not how soon so she may be assured her pleasure is not greater than her profit to that end she leaves her Honey-pot sometimes uncovered on purpose that the gawdy Wasps and Humble-Bees may lick and tast thereof till with it's glutinous quality like Bird-lime some so stick therein that they cannot get out till they have dearly paid for their stoln sweets though she hath broken her leg she is sound enough for a Drawer newly out of his time who having credit for wine his house is furnished with the money that did set his wifes broken leg with some addition of her Uncles besides we must not imagine she was so carcless of her self in the management of the Bar but that she laid by something for a lying in in the Country if need required being thus married and set up either on the Merchants credit or on Tunnage they are now more at liberty to Wheedle for themselves than formerly he is all complaisance and cringe and will be sure to score a bottle in the reckoning extraordinary that he may present that company with one upon their going the more to endear them to the house he is very free of his flesh without exception and is full of invitations especially to a Sundays Dinner for usually he hath then something more than ordinary and then drinks and says you are heartily welcome and drinks and tells you so again so often that in the end you will find it cheaper to Dine at a Crown Ordinary and yet still stand obliged for these eating kindnesses Here note that in whatsoever Wine you drink to the Mistress