But the soule convinced by the spirit is convinced of this sin as of the sin of sinnes viz. unbeleefe Oh saith a soul which is convinced by the spirit I know drunkennesse is a sin uncleannesse is a sinne pride a sin c. But I know unbeleef is a sin as great ray greater then them all This is laid upon my spirit that Christ is come into the world sweetly discovering the love of God freely tendering reconcilement in his blood But I Oh I did little see and much slight him I did not make it my worke to go after him nor have I been willing when he hath come after me to accept him And this oh this hath been nay I fear 't is still my sin Oh this base vile damnable unbeleefe is that which hath and doth lye upon my spirit Other sins put me in an â—â—â—solute necessity of salvation and this sealed me under damnation HEE THAT BELEEVETH NOT HE IS CONDEMNED ALREADY Oh that Scripture tooke hold on me Christ came and was willing to imbrace but I would not beleeve He came sweetly weeing and I stood out sinfully rejecting He tendered grace freely and I did put off that tender wretchedly He said come unto me and I le ease you and I did not could not would not beleeve and therefore came not to him This O this I am convinced of as my sin and this I doubt is my sin to this day The truth is I can hardly beleive yet that Christ came to save sinners Why say Oh soul doth not thy heart answer to these things as face to face is there not a copy of this complaint in the secret tables of thy heart If there be pray who should nay who could write it but the spirit Who could take these things of Christ and reveale them unto thee but the spirit Surely if none can call Jesus Lord but by the spirit as it is 1 Cor. 12.3 Then none could be convinced so far of sin for not receiving of or beleeving in which is all one this Lord Christ but by the Holy Ghost But Secondly What is the great principle upon which you are most convicted Is it SENSE or HOPE of divine love It may be thou hast sometimes tasted how good the Lord is Peradventure you have had some sence of the love of God Or It may be you have only sometimes attained some hopes of divine loves Now is it this that doth most affect thy heart in thy conviction Doth not thy soule say Oh! what a vile wretch have I been who have despised the riches of Gods goodnesse and who have not been led thereby unto repentance Standest thou convinced of the greatnesse of sins by the consideration of the greatnesse of his love Because God hath been is and thou hopest will be exceeding good Art not upon this convinced that thou art and hast been exceeding bad Surely so much as love and sweetnesse hath had an influence upon thy conviction so much the spirit hath been in it The hand of wrath may convince a Pharoah that he hath sinned but an eye of love will make a Peter weep bitterly Therfore Thirdly In thy convictions for sin what sight hast thou had of Christ The spirit where he convinceth of sin he also convinceth of righteousnesse as t is John 16.10 i.e. the spirit convinceth the soule that albeit it is unrighteous yet there is a righteousnesse in Christ which it may have The spirit where he is a messenger of sin comming in and convincing the soule thereof he is also an Interpreter taking the things of Christ and so shewing thereof unto the soule the spirit is that one of a thousand to shew unto man his uprightnesse as t is Job 33.23 An hypocrite may be convinced by the Law but alas in that conviction he sees only a Moses But a Saint is convinced not only by the Law but the Gospell and therefore in his conviction he sees a Messiah Canst not thou say O soul when thou wert convinced that thou wert a sinner thou wert also convinced that there was a Saviour Didst not thou see a remedy as well as a disease a healing plaister as well as a killing wound A Saviour as well beseeching sinners to come unto him that they might have life as blaming of them for not beleeving in him that they might be free from death Surely soule its the spirit who giveth life the letter killeth Where the letter convinceth only it doth leave a soule under the sentence of death But if together with the sentence of death for sin thou didst also see the hopes of life in a righteousnesse then there was something more and higher then the letter in thy conviction even the Holy Ghost If then when thou wert convinced thou didst see unbeleife as the great sin and divine love as the great aggravation of that unbeleife and yet withall a sight of free and full righteousnesse tendred as a cure of both If I say thou didst see these things in thy conviction why art thou cast down O soule and why dost thou fear the spirit was not in thy conviction To go on then to the last branch of this fear and doubt Thou sayst O soul that dost fear thy comfort was not from the spirit At lest thou sayst thou dost doubt it It s true after thy storme thou didst heare a still voyce but sayst thou was the spirit in that voyce Sometimes even after conviction thou dost say thou didst feel comfort but thou fearest whether it were from the spirit or from the letter and fancy c. Why now in order to the scattering of this fear let me intreate you to consider these three things First Whence it was that thy comfort was fetched which was brought to thee was it not such as one of a thousand could not bring came it not from Jesus Christ who can only give man his righteousnesse as it is Job 33 23. He shall take of mine and shall shew it unto you saith Christ of the spirit Job 16.15 Where the spirit brings in comfort it is still shewed to be fetched from Christ Alas canst not thou say It was not from any creature men or Angell that the hope of your comfort came Alas miserable Comforters were they all But it was onely from Christ where the spirit comforts he doth it still in a discovery of Christ As he shewes Christ pierced by the soule and useth that sight unto conviction so he discovers Christ willing to imbrace the soul and useth this sight unto consolation The peace and comfort of some is rather from a cessation of the trouble of conscience then from a sight and discovery of Christ Now if thy comfort came only from an apprehension of Christ and from a sight of the things in him why art thou disquieted as if thy comfort were not from the spirit Since as no man knoweth the things of a man save the spirit of man which is in him 1 Cor. 2.11 Even so the
him Our prayers have been rather the fruit of our heads and babbling of our lips then the breath of our hearts and panting of our spirits And yet say some soules Suppose our spirits were in prayer We feare Gods spirit was not The father seeketh such to worship him as do it in the spirit and the Apostle calls for praying in the Holy Ghost Now though our own spirit was in our prayers we feare Christs spirit was not It may be wee have prayed in the gifts of the spirit But what are they without the spirit himselfe Againe say the same dejected soules although wee should thinke and hope that we have prayed both in the sincerity of our own spirit and in the strength of Christs spirit yet we feare whether ever God hath regarded Surely he hath been alway angry with for as yet he never answered any of our prayers And to call and not bee heard to pray and not be answered Pro. 1.28 is a threatned judgement This oh this is our feare that we are those at whose calamitie God will laugh as it is Pro. 1.26 Secondly There are others who in their dejection vent other feares As now about the word whether ever it came to them as the word of God and as good seed upon good ground Alas cryeth one poore dejected soule I have heard the word often preached but I fear to no purpose for I thinke I never heard God in it It was the praise of the Thessalonians that they heard the word not as the word of men but as the word of God But it s my shame and sorrow I have rather heard men then God I read saith the soule the Parable of the Sower and I remember there was but one good ground which received the seed aright and I fear I am none of that I doubt I am the high-way-ground or the stony or the thorny but sure I am not the good ground i. e. one who with an honest and good heart having heard the word doth keep it for sure I bring not forth the fruit with patience Thus the fears of some dejected soules work about the word But Thirdly Other dejected souls breathe forth feares about the Promises As whether they have right to them or did ever in the spirit close with them Oh say some soules the Promises are indeede exceeding great and precious But are they ours wee doubt it my soule doubts saith one when I reade the Promises I doe rather read the riches of others then my owne Alas I feare they are none of mine and I dare not indeed cannot close with them Sometimes I have climbed the outside of the Promise I have read the letter but alas I never was in the inside in the spirit of a Promise It s likely many hung upon Noahs Arke without But none were saved but those within And I feare I was never within the Arke of any Promise Fourthly Some soules when cast downe feare their very abstinence from sinne As now whether they did or doe abstaine from sinne in a slavish way for feare or in a Sonne-like way for love I feare saith the soule I have and I do abstaine from sin rather from rationall then from pious principles I doubt I dread the coale of corruption rather for the fire of it which will burne mee then the filib of it which will blacke mee I doubt its the cudgell of wrath that drives me backe rather then the coard of love which keepes mee in from sinne Good soules abstaine from sin from heavenly principles as love of God desire of holinesse and I feare my principles are hellish as feare of damnation and or at best but earthly as shame of men and the like Fiftly Some soules when cast down cry out Oh the sinne against the Holy Ghost I feare saith a dejected soul I have sinned unto death I have sinned against such strong light and such sweet love that I feare my sinne is now the unpardonable sinne which shall not cannot bee forgiven I may well bee cast downe if that bee my case which was Judas his and I feare it is Christ saith all sinne and blasphemy shall bee forgiven but that which is against the Holy Ghost Alas here is my fear that I am guilty of that sin Sixtly The feares of some when cast downe doe not worke thus high yet they vent themselves thus Oh we feare we shall fall away Angells fell Adam fell others fall and are we surer then they Surely we are not so strong and therefore not so sure Many have gone beyond me in the spirit and yet saith the soule have ended in the flesh and I feare I shall doe so too I goe but softly I fall often I looke backe many times and I doubt I shall never persevere unto the death what is it to begin well and end ill what is it to have Ephraims righteousnesse A morning dew Alas mine is no better if so good This is my case and I may well be cast downe for I fear I shall fall The promise of the Crown is to perseverance Hee that is faithfull to the death shall have the crowne of life But I feare I doubt I shall not hold out neare unto death for my heart misgives me and I feare I shall fall away ere long and loose all at last CHAP. 8. The other branch of the workings of spirituall dejections which is greife and sorrow HAving now gone over sundry doubts and feares which are the workings of spirituall dejections I shall touch in a word only upon the other branch viz. That of greife and sorrow For As the soule when it s cast downe is full of feare so likewise its full of griefe Disquieted David vents himselfe not onely in feares but in sorrowes His teares were his meat day and night as it is vers .. 3. He went in mourning ver 9. Sighs complaints expostulations those also are the workings of spirituall dejection Ah Lord what palenesse of face what wringing of the hands what watering of the cheeks doth dejection produce what beating of the breast with the Publican what weeping and crying with Rachell what questioning and crying with Mary doth casting down cause There are two appearances of these kind of workings 1 Within The soule tosseth it selfe up and downe the heart rowles and beates as if it would breake its passage through the body How doth the soule talke with its selfe and aggravate its griefe How is the heart smitten and withered as grasse as t is Psal 102.4 The bowells boile and rest not as t is Job 30.26 2 Without The lips quiver as t is Hab. 3.16 The eyes run down all the night as Lam. 1. the voice that speakes faintly And is there any sorrow as mine was ever soule as I am Did you ever meet with any in my case Thus griefe vents it selfe and thus doth the disquieted soule as it thinkes ease it selfe But I neede not go about to paint these sorrowes some soules are able
next fear which I shall speake unto is that which concernes the Authour of that worke which is in the soule Some soules when they are cast downe Cafe cry out they feare that all that worke which is passed upon them is no more then in the bare letter as they call it i. e. they doubt whether it be of the spirit yea or no as was opened in the former part c. Now for the removing of this feare Satisfaction and to raise up a soule that is cast downe and lyes doubting whether its calling conviction and comfort be from the spirit yea or no I shall speak to each of these by themselves First For thy calling O soule thou sayst thou fearest thou wert only called by men i.e. wrought upon to leave thy sins and former course by the meer wit and oratory of men in perswading c. There be three things which I would offer to scatter thy fear in this particular 1 Consider that thy call may be by the spirit though thou doe thinke it was by man only It s certaine that the spirit speakes to our hearts mostly by men Immediate calls are rare It may be you feare your call was not by the spirit because 't was by men It might be mans speech and the spirits call 'T was Christ that preached to the Ephesians though it were Paul that spake Paul tells them Christ came and preached peace to them Ephes 2.17 And yet we know Christ was never at Ephesus and Paul speakes this of Christ after the time of his suffering as is deducible from vers 16. Indeed 't was Christ that preached by Paul And though man was the trumpet yet the spirit was the breath that filled it when thou wert called from thy sin Look as in Samuels case it was the Lord called him and he thought 't was Eli as 't is 1 Sam. 3. so it may be with you and the reason may be as it was in Samuels case He was a child and so did not know yet as the text saith the Lord It may be thou art a child as yet O soule and art not so well able to distinguish of the Lord from men Thou as yet mayest not be acquainted with the mysteries of the spirit and therefore thou mayest thinke t is only man when it was the spirit which called thee Hereafter when thou shalt grow up to a fuller age in Christ this childish thing and feare may be done away And thou shalt no more speake as a child and say thou fearest 't was man only that called thee But thou shalt be taught of God and know thou wert called by the spirit 2 Call to minde in what frame of soule thou wert if thou canst call it to mind when thy first call was and consider what it was and is which doth prevaile with you Happily thy soul was in a direct way of opposing God and thou didst little thinke of him when he called thee The more unexpected it was the more of the spirit was in the call Besides say O soule was it not naked truth plaine simple truth that did and doth most take with thy heart Surely the more plaine truth was which did worke upon you the more of the spirit was in that worke It s a rule case the lesse of man the more of God Art not able to say O soule that thou wert going on in a vaine vile way of living without God and that thou wert so taken up with the world and vanity c. that God was not in all thy thoughts And that at a time thou didst either read or hear such or such a naked truth As to instance that thou wert a child of wrath by nature that out of Christ there is no hope of salvation c. And that hereupon unexpectedly thou didst find thy heart moved to take another course Peradventure thou hadst read or heard and didst know the same truth before O but at such or such a time thou didst find thy heart more wrought upon by it then ever I beseech you seriously say hath it not been thus with you If it hath why doubt ye that your call is not by the spirit But 3 Call to mind And in sincerity tell and confesse what it was that thou wert ialled from and what it is that thou wert called to Canst not thou say thy call was not so much at lest not only from misery but it was from sinne T is true many a man by naturall conscience and fleshly principles is thus far wrought upon in a call that it is willing to come out of misery I but thy soule can say it was willing to come from sinne and 't was from that which in thy call thy heart was taken off Yea and art not thou able to say thou didst find thy heart in thy call really going out after as conceiving thou wert called unto holinesse as t is 1 Thes 4.7 Cannot you appeale to God that in your call you did at lest that now you do find your hearts not only called and made willing to leave a sorrowfull estate and come into a happy one But also to leave a sinfull estate and come into a holy estate Certainly if your call were not only from misery but from sinne And if it were to be as well and as much nay more unto holinesse then unto freedom from misery I say if you can clear this And do not your consciences oh ye dejected souls witnesse to this then why do ye doubt what reason have you to feare that your call was not of the spirit To come therefore to the other thing viz. Secondly To your Conviction You say you doubt whether that were of the spirit and evangelicall or only by the letter and legall Now to satisfie you in this there are 3 questions which I would put unto you And in the sincerity of your hearts resolve them 1 What was the great sin of which you were and are convicted when thy heart was convinced of sin what was the greatest sinne which then thou wert convinced of Search your hearts and consider what answer to give can you say it was unbeleife Certainly if you were convinced of that it was the spirit which wrought that conviction I desire not to be mistaken I do not urge this as if I thought there either were not or needed not any more conviction then this for certainly saving conviction extends it selfe to all sin and in particular to our particular speciall sinnes But my aime is to hint something as a signall discovery of conviction by the spirit and in order to this it is which I am now speaking Now then wert thou ever convinced of unbeleefe Hast thou seen this to be a sin yea and to be a great sin Certainly if thou hast thy conviction hath been of the Holy Ghost It s the peculiar worke of the spirit to convince of unbeleefe as t is John 16.9.11 Many a soule is convinced of these or these sins
a time thou shouldest deny him CHAP. 9. Satisfaction for soules cast downe about Prayer BEsides those eight particular feares which I spake of in the sixth Chapter of the foregoing Section I added six other feares which do appeare in some dejected soules Now it s my desire to speake something to them in order to satisfie some soules that lye and labour under them Some there are that when they are cast downe doe much disquiet themselves about their prayers Case Oh say some we feare we never prayed in all our lives or if wee did wee question whether God ever heard us c. Now for the satisfaction of soules in this case I shall speake unto it in both its branches And Satisfaction First For such soules as are cast down and disquieted and cry out Oh they never prayed in all their lives It s true they say they have sometimes spoke in prayer but they doubt whether ever they prayed in prayer They feare they rather moved their lips then breathed their spirits c. There are these things which I would say unto such souls First This very fear argues a choice frame It proceeds from a very choyce spirit thus to fear Indeed a slight and common spirit doth pray it cares not how So the worke be done it s all they mind and it were well some minded so much But with what frame of spirit they pray alas that they looke not after Some there are that we call Protestants which in this are as bad as Papists that they rather give God a number of prayers then any thing else but now it argues a spirit something heightened to mind the manner of prayer to eye the spirit and the soul how that is in prayer Looke as it argues in things humaine an ordinary minde that can content it selfe with the bare doing of things how bunglingly so ever whereas it proceeds from a raisednesse of mind to see that every thing be well done as well as done to see it be done neatly c. So it argues in things divine a common spirit such an one as Caine had to be contented with a bare sacrifice a bare empty prayer But it discovers a spirit heightened such an one as Paul had to eye the spirit how it is in prayer Paul professeth he would pray in his spirit and with understanding While it may be many neither care for the spirit nor understanding So that this fear hath some good in it in as much as it proceeds from a choicenesse of spirit But Secondly Take heed you do not roshly nor groundlesly condemne your selfe Peradventure there was more of your spirit in prayer then you saw or say What dare you deny that at such and such a time your spirit was in your prayer If it were not then what meant those sighs and tears and groanes what meant that bearing of the bosome and those liftings up and wringing of the bonds if your spirit was not in your prayers Surely as in point of smning albeit wicked men should say their hearts were not in it Yet their joy and merriment in it would witnes against them So in the manner of praying though Saints doubt their hearts was not in it yet their sighs and groanes in the spirit though unutterable in themselves yet they could witnesse for them in this However Thirdly Can and dare you appeale to God that so far as you knew your heart it was at such and such a time in prayer Can you say Lord thou knowest that I desired such a grace c. and oh how glad was I in the bare thoughts and smalâ— hopes that I had of obtaining it But on the contrary how did the fear and sence of not obtaining it grieve me Surely if you can thus seriously and consideringly appeal to God you may conclude that your heart and spirit was in prayer Besides Fourthly Consider thy soule might have been and may be in a prayer notwithstanding many dulnesses and wanderings I find by experience that the ground of this fear is that dulnesse and those wandrings of our spirits in prayer Now cleare it is that notwithstanding these yet our spirit may be really and so accounted by God in duty You know in that duty of watching with Christ in his agony T is recorded the disciples slept yet marke it Christ saw and said their spirit was in it The spirit saith he is willing but the flesh is weake Christ saw their spirit and acknowledged its willingnesse notwithstanding their drousinesse And for wandrings you know t is possible for the eye to be fixed upon an object and yet not to be so fixt as to be altogether free from rowlings The eye may bee upon the sun and yet it may twinckle And certainly if we should say that the heart is not in prayer because of some wandrings wee should condemn the generation of the just For to be so intense upon God as to have no wandring thoughts at all is not attained unto by many if by any at all So that now why shouldest thou say thy spirit was not in prayer because of some dulnesse and wandrings T is possible that these things may be and yet God may see yea and acknowledge thy spirit to be in thy prayers Object But alas saith the soule cast down Suppose my spirit be or were in prayer what is that I feare I never prayed in Christs Spirit It is one thing to pray in our spirits another thing to pray in Christs spirit Now I feare I never prayed in the strength of Christs spirit however it might be in the strength and sincerity of my own For answer and satisfaction to this Ans let me intreate you to consider these particulars First This is a more choyce fear then the former It s a choyce thing to eye our owne spirit It s a choicer to eye Christs spirit in prayer Morall sincerity may a little put on the former But its divine sincerity which looks after and unto this Nadab and Abihu can content themselves with strange fire But Moses and Aaron will not offer but with holy fire It s certainly an evidence of a soule more then ordinarily heightned not to be content to pray in the sincerity of our spirit but to labour for the strength of Gods spirit Secondly T is possible to pray in the holy Ghost and yet to doubt it I find some doubting they never prayed in the spirit because they have been straitned and wanted those inlargements which others have c. Now mind it t is possible to pray in and that by the holy Ghost and yet not to be inlarged The soule may be so full as that it may not be able to vent it selfe Fulnesse of spirit doth sometimes cause straitning As now in Davids case it s said then went King David in and sat before the Lord c. Then i. e. when as Nathan had been and told him at large the rich and sweet intentions of God towards him Certainly
now Davids spirit could not chuse but be very full And yet mark what he saith Who am I O Lord God and what is my house that thou hast brought me hither-unto And this was yet a small thing in thy sight O Lord God but thou hast spoken also of thy servants house for a great while to come and is this the manner of men O Lord God But now marke it what followes upon this as it were entry upon the duty And what can David say more unto thee for thou O Lord knowest thy servant See how he is straitened so that hee cannot say more But he is fain to say as sometimes it may be you have done Lord thou knowest thy servant So that you see there may be the spirit where and while the soule is straitned and certainly as Hypocrites may have inlargements and yet not the Holy Ghost so Saints may have the Holy Ghost and yet want inlargements Thirdly Consider How much of God as a Father didst thou see in prayer It s the worke of the spirit to helpe the soule to see God as a father and to cry Abba and to fill the soule with not words and expressions but with sighs and groanes unutterable So that then to satisfie thy self O dejected soule in this feare consider thy very feare is choyce And it may not be as thou fearest But shall I suppose it suppose it should be so that as yet thou didst never pray Suppose I admit it that thou didst not in the sincerity of thy spirit nor in the assistance of Christs Spirit pray yet for all that consider these things First Free grace can and doth beseech soules to accept of peace and love who doe not begge for it God by us saith the Apostle beseecheth you Though thou didst not nor canst pray to God yet free Grace comes and as I may say prayes to thee Thou sayest I shall never have peace and reconciliation for I never by Prayer did beseech God for it Why remember God tenders and in his free grace comes and beseecheth you to accept of it Secondly God can give though ye cannot or doe not begge he is able to doe abundantly above all that we can aske or thinke Ephes 3.20 yea and he is willing for before they call I will answer saith the Lord And he is found of them that seeke him not Though God be pleased to come in in prayer yet he is not tyed to it Besides Thirdly consider its Christs worke to offer up prayers for us he lives for ever to make intercession Heb. 7.25 when thy heart is dead he lives and he prayes for those that doe not cannot pray for themselves Fourthly know the Spirit is promised for asking Luk. 11.13 you who cannot pray remember to aske and to waite for the Spirit And you have Christs word to encourage and assure you that you shall have the Spirit so that now why are you cast downe as fearing you never did pray consider your feare is good yet it may be groundlesse However Gods heart first opens it selfe to us Be not cast downe unto despaire know God can and will give to such as neither doe nor can aske besides in time he 'l prepare thy heart and cause his eare to heare as it is Psal 10.17 why may not this raise thy soule who art cast downe and sayest thou didst never pray Ob. But wilt thou say Suppose I have prayed indeed I hope I have and daily I desire to doe it but alas What though I pray if God doth not heare what though I call he doth not answer This O this doth disquiet my soule I have prayed oft but I feare I have been heard never Ans Indeed this is the other branch of the fear according to what Christ hath given me I shall endeavour to scatter it I must acknowledge O soule that its a misery scarce expressable to pray and not to be heard But yet know many conceive themselves in this misery without ground In order therefore to the satisfaction and raysing of thy soule under this dejection let me prevaile with thee to consider with sincere and serious spirit these particulars First God may have heard thee though thou doe not thinke so It s true peradventure God hath not yet returned an answer in some particulars but yet he may have heard your prayers God is a free Agent and so he may take his owne time to send an answer Suppose thou send a Letter to a friend by a sure Messenger what though you have not an answer presently will you say your Letter was lost or that your friend did not receive it Why the case is so your prayers are your letters to God and Christ is a sure messenger though as yet God hath not sent his answer yet your Letters are read your prayers are accepted and in time viz. Gods time they shall be punctually answered God will answer your prayers that cry unto him night and day though he heare long as it is Luk 18.7 But Secondly It s possible the answer may be sent and you have not observed it There are Letters at the Post-house sometimes for us which only want fetching home The Spirit who brings returnes from Heaven hath an answer for us but we eye him not Job speakes of Gods going by and he saw him not of his passing on and he perceived it not Job 9.11 O how many times doth God go by us in acts of providence clearly and directly answering our prayers and yet we doe not see it nor perceive it Besides Thirdly for any thing you know your prayers will not be answered till you are dead your Children or the Churches may have answers of your prayers when you are gone or it may be God will reserve the answer till your death How many dying soules have said now O now we see and heare that God hath answered all our prayers Why then art thou cast downe O soule about thy prayers as if they were not answered Obj. But I cannot beleeve that God will ever answer Sure I am its well if it be so that I have eyed Providences exactly and could as yet never see any answer and what God will doe for time to come I know not but I doubt c. Ans Be it as thou fearest what if God as yet have not answered thy prayers in many in any particulars yet be not dejected O soule over-much for consider First unanswered prayers are not lost thou hast not prayed in vaine for God never bid the house of Jacob doe so thy letters are filed up in Heaven and though they are not answered yet they are remembred God doth not forget your labour of love in your letters of love for such are prayers it s our duty to pray 't is Gods grace to answer though as yet he reveales not that grace yet it makes not voyd our duty Secoundly God may be pleased with thy prayers though he doe not answer The Mother is pleased with
Soul in the cave Psal 57. yea and he composed a special choyce Psalme upon each occasion therefore he stiles them Michtams i. e. golden Psalmes and yet it was after all this that he fell in that foule businesse I might instance in Peters Case which seemed and in a sence did exceed Davids and in the case of others and yet none ever charged them with the sinne against the Holy Ghost so that t is cleare many are mistaken in this sinne and why mayest not thou be mistaken oh soule who fearest it Thirdly There are some soules who are not at present capable of that sinne my meaning is that cannot possibly at present be charged with it as now such as are not very highly enlightened such as have not had any great or high income of joy and sweetnesse such as have not been eminent and long professors All Divines conclude that a person sinning the sinne against the Holy Ghost must be supposed to be 1. One much enlightened 2. One who hath tasted of the heavenly gift and the joyes of the Holy Ghost yea and 3. One who hath been some famous and forward Professor Now alas poore soule thou cryest out thou art but a babe a novice one who knowes little and hast tasted lesse one who hath small light and weake life and no joy or comfort at all one whose highest degree of knowledge is but as yet a beame whose greatest income of joy is but a drop who art a stranger to tasting of the heavenly powers and the world to come and who yet art no forwarder then humbly to professe to desire to feare Jehovah and to love Jesus Thou dost often sigh these sayings and seale to them as true and this may secure thee from being guilty of the sinne against the Holy Ghost sith at present thou art incapable of that sinne But Forthly The soule guilty of this sinne cannot be troubled for it at least so as to desire to repent of it and to have Christ to pardon it Thy feare thy trouble thy disquiets O soule argue thou art free from this sinne for wert thou guilty of it thy heart it would be hardred and could not desire to repent thy Conscience it would be seared and no way disquieted for it yea and thy desires would be dead so as that thou wouldest not pant after Christ nor the Spirit thy very feares and disquiets should answer in this case themselves they could not would not be in thee if this sinne were committed by thee a senslesse and troublelesse soule ever goes along with this sinne and therefore know this Fifthly None can be guilty of the sin against the Holy Ghost but such as First totally fall away from both Practise and Profession of all godlinesse and Religion as t is Heb. 6.6 Secondly Directly doe despite unto the spirit of grace as t is Heb. 10.29 and Thirdly Such as doe directly and plainly and professedly oppose and speake evill of the wayes of Christ which sometimes they professed Now tell me O soule and beware of false witnesse against thy selfe Quest First Art thou totally falne away from both the practise and profession of godlinesse Dost hold no points of Faith Dost doe no acts of Religion Dost make no profession of Jesus Christ Answ Surely I heare the say I desire to beleeve and the Lord help my unbeleefe I desire to walke exactly to have a good Conscience to God and man and this profession I make that if I know my heart I desire to worship the God of my Fathers according to that order of the Gospell which many count and call Heresie well then O soule thou art not totally falne away which yet thou wouldest be if thou wert guilty of the sinne feared But Quest Secondly Say soule and doe not eclipse the truth of Gods grace in thee Darest thou doe despight to the Holy Ghost Ans Surely I heare thee answering I tremble at the thought thereof I would not for ten thousand worlds speake the least evill of that good Spirit I am so farre from despiting him that I doe earnestly desire him and waite for him Alas this O soule would not could not be wert thou guilty of this sinne Then Thirdly answer O soule Dost thou oppose godlinesse Quest What dost or darest thou persecute such as desire to walke with Christ c Answ Is not this thy reply to this That thou rather pittyest thy selfe for not being so forward as others then persecutest them for being before thee Yea thou art so farre from opposing those that are godly that thou wouldest if Christ would help thee suffer any persecutions rather then leave off thy endeavour to be godly Now certainly O poore dejected soule thou art not guilty of the sinne thou fearest for if thou wert thou wouldest fall away wholly and speake evill of the Spirit directly and oppose godlinesse professedly sith these things doe ever accompany that sinne against the Holy Ghost But Lastly there have been precious soules who sometime feared their sinning against the Holy Ghost and yet have afterward enjoyed the sealing of the Holy Ghost See the Bookes of them Mistris Drake Mistris Wight and others of late have brought forth this experience fully to light that soules who have sometimes questioned their sinning unto death have yet found the Spirit sealing them up to life and Mistris Drake breathed out a little before her death this comfortable counsel Never let any despaire how desperately miserable soever their case be Wherefore then rouze up thy selfe O dejected soule thou who now fearest the sinne against the Spirit mayest ere long boast of the seale of the Spirit Trust thou in Christ for thou shalt yet praise him for joy and assurance given in by that Holy Ghost against whom at present thou fearest that thou hast sinned CHAP. 14. There remaines yet one Case more which being spoke unto puts an end to this Section NOw this Case is the feare of falling away after all Case Many a poor soul which is satisfied it may be for the present in its state yet questions it for the future Oh! say some soules we feare we shall never hold out many have gone farte and yet have perished at last for want of perseverance indeed this is usually the last trouble of dejected soules and in this as in a last refuge they shelter their feares Suppose say they our case be now as good as the Angels at first as good as Adams in Paradice yet Adam fel and Angels fel and we fear the like Now unto these soules I would offer these particulars Satisfaction in order to raise them from under this dejection First Blessed is the soule that feareth alway The soule standeth surest while it trembleth the Apostle adviseth him that standeth to take heed least he fall And the way to stand is not to be high minded but to feare as it is Rom. 11.20 Many had never fell had they ever feared Peters presumption was his fayling
is too long to be out of Covenant with God but yet it is not now too late To day if you will heare his voyce O therefore close with the Covenant now and doe not lye cast downe and dejected with feares that thou art out But arise and come in for now in these Gospel times even the Strangers and Eunuch debard in the times of the Law from the Congregation are invited to take hold of the Covenant and there are promises to this purpose made unto them in Esa 56. to which place I referre thee for a further cure in this case CHAP. 18. Cure for Soules cast downe upon indisposition to duties INdisposition unto good duties is oftentimes a cause of dejection Cause and by reason of it some are cast downe as conceiving it inconsistent with a life of grace and acceptation with God Now to cure this I shall apply these particular Plaisters First Life and indisposition may consist together Cure Every living man is not lively alway Even the Spouse of Christ was sometimes asleep Cant. 5.2 Even David himselfe cryes out of straitnesse of heart It is possible thy soule may sometimes be as a Ship at Sea without a full and fresh gale I may speake it I thinke as an universall truth Never was any Saint disposed to duties at all times alike and why shouldest thou be cast downe at the common Lot and condition of all Christians Secondly It is a mercy thou art not quite dead to duty Many a soule is starke dead to prayer starke dead to the Word c. and it is Free Grace thou art at worst but indisposed better is the crawling Snaile then the dead Elephant And it is a more blessed state to be a creeping worme though with much indisposition in the way of duty and life then a skipping heart though with much agility in the way of sinne and death Thirdly Though thy indisposednesse be sad yet thy trouble for this is sweet Note Blessed is the soule that mournes for disposition to evill and indisposition to good Time was when thou couldest live and not be troubled at a totall neglect of duty it is a mercy that now thou lovest it so well as that thou art grieved that thou canst doe it no better But Fourthly Consider thy acceptance with God doth not depend upon thy doing of duty nor upon thy livelinesse and disposition in doing no it depends solely upon his grace You are accepted in the beloved as it is in that precious place Eph. 1.6 Both thy person notwithstanding its faults and thy performances notwithstanding their failings are alwayes accepted in Christ he hath made us accepted in the beloved marke it it is not thou but God that makes thee I say MAKES thee not thy selfe that makest thy selfe accepted yea and this is in the Beloved not in our duties or dispositions but in the BELOVED i. e. in Christ Jesus I tell thee poore soule couldest thou doe well and with never so much life and disposition out of Christ it were nothing And contrary though thy doings be poore thy disposition poore all poore yet thou and all thine are accepted IN THE BELOVED Fifthly It is the office of Christ to present all thy performances to God and to procure acceptation in his bloud He takes away all thy failings and indispositions and he presents all to the Father well Minde this Duties goe never from Saints to God as they come out of their owne hands but as they goe through Christs Lastly Christ O dejected soule will cure thy indisposednesse Hee 'l inlarge thy heart and inliven thy spirit and then shalt thou not only walke but run the way of his Commandements when he shall inlarge thy heart as it is Psal 119 32. The Spirit is a Spirit of life power sweetnesse inlargement and this Spirit he hath promised So that these things sucked by meditation may afford cure and comfort to thee O dejected soule who art cast downe under the sence of indisposition to duties CHAP. 19. Cure for Soules cast downe upon want of incomes BUt alas sayes some other soule I doe but in vaine I doe not complaine of indisposition to though I might urge that but of want of income in duty Cause See the thing as it is stated Sect. 1. cap. 9. I confesse it is sad to be as the parched ground alway gaping and never to have drops from above Cure But yet O soule let me intreat thee to minde a few things in this case First Divine income is not alway the same Peradventure thou hast not so much now as formerly it may be so for First God gave thee much at first to incourage thee as a beginner which he doth not alway to all Vsually it is in Gods House as it is in ours at first comming of a Servant the Master is a little more familiar then afterward At first comming God might give much to welcome thee and to ingage thee but now thou hast been long in his house he mindes thee as much as formerly though he hint it not so often Besides Secondly God may with-hold incomes to try thee whether thou servest him for LOVE or for the LOAVES Many serve Christ not for himselfe but for themselves rather for the penny of income then for respect to him Now Christ may with-hold incomes to try thee and therefore be not cast downe for want of them lest thou give him ground to suspect thee but consider Secondly It is Christs Prerogative if he will use it to make us serve for nothing The Psalmist speakes it to the Kings Daughter of Christ He is thy Lord and worship thou him Psal 45.11 He must be worshipped as a Lord because of his greatnesse though hee should not give any income or wages Yet Thirdly He doth waite to give income in its season There are times when incomes will be most sweet and Christ doth waite for those times Christ said to his Mother Woman what have I to doe with thee Joh. 2. He knew there would by and by be a fitter season to doe that which she desired then at that time your time said Christ is alwayes my time is not yet come as it is Job 7 6. O remember dejected soule Christ waites to be gracious his income shall be when fittest for thee Fourthly It will argue a choyce frame of spirit in thee and therefore I mention it to presse it on thee to doe duty notwithstanding thou want income To worke without wages argues a love to the Master we work for a mercinary spirit wil doe for pay but a gracious childe-like spirit will pay its selfe in its doing and continue praying hearing receiving c. even without any income But Lastly To cure thy dejected soule who art troubled for want of income Know that in Heaven thou shalt have income for all The Master called the Servants at the evening and gave then to each his penny O consider thou shalt ere long have income
canst not others may The Psalmist tells you of a case that was too hard for him to resolve himselfe in and yet when he went to the Sanctuary he had satisfaction Psal 73.16 17. O poore soules you may not be able after all your expostulation to satisfie your selves yet doe not conclude against your selves but goe to the Sanctuary and you shall have satisfaction there 4 Beware of partiality Heare as wel what may be said for as what is said against your soules You have a willing spirit though a weake flesh you have a waking heart though a sleepy head you are comely though black Heare as wel pro as con receive as wel arguments for your selves as insinuations against your selves Surely it s not only your wisdome but your duty You must as wel argue for liftings up for what there is in you of Christ as for castings downe for what there is in you of corruption You are not just Arbitrators not righteous in expostulation if you argue not both parts therefore in your arguing beware of partiality it s a needfull caution O how many cry out O they sleep they are black they have this corruption and they wrestle with that temptation but never minde what watchfulnesse what comlinesse what grace what helpe c. they have from Christ and it s no wonder that they are cast downe But beware of this partiality in your expostulation with your selves 5 Make the Gospel the Judge of your case let not the Law but let Grace moderate your dispute While you argue the case with your soule take heed of Moses hee 'l cast you down lower if he moderate But appeale to Christ by him comes grace and truth hee 'l decide the controversie truly and if sinne have the truth Note this hee 'l acknowledge it unto repentance but hee 'l decide it also graciously and where sinne abounds hee 'l say grace superabounds unto faith therefore in your self-soule-expostulation bring your heart into the presence of Christ and let him alone be Judge 6 Resolve never to conclude finally against thy soule whatever at present may be proved against it When thy soule hath said all that it can against thy state and when after all that thou hast answered thy soule is unsatisfied nay suppose thou finde every thing punctually proved as a reason for dejection yet resolve to conclude nothing against thy selfe for God can help at last though Satan should be righteous in his accusation and thy conscience joyn with him in witnessing against thee yet know Christ is righteous in thy absolution and his bloud can cleanse thy conscience yea and it shall Heb. 10. But you will say What if in my expostulation I finde my owne conscience condemning me must I resolve not to conclude of my estate by that Ans No not finally thy conscience may condemne thee now and yet acquit thee anon Nay Christ may permit first thy owne conscience to condemne thee that afterwards thou maist see and prize his grace in acquitting thee Well these be the rules to mannage your selfe-argumentation I wil give a few words more to direct you in the argumentation it selfe and then I le conclude this Section But you wil say How shall we doe to argue the case with our owne soules why for this take these directions following 1 Question Your owne soules 2 Chide Your owne soules 3 Informe Your owne soules First Question your owne soules put some questions to your spirits about your sadnesse and see what answers are returned As 1 Quest What indeed is the ground of this dejection Is it sinne why there is grace Is it Satan an enemy there is Christ a friend Say what O what my soule is the ground of this dejection 2 Quest What dost ayme at in thy trouble O soule Is it to please God to satisfie for sinne Alas he is not pleased with our sorrows neither is there satisfaction in our dejection 3 Quest What it meanes thus to be disquieted Doth it meane thus to ease its selfe Alas this is rather to increase trouble then to finde comfort Secondly Chide your soules for your dejection reprove your selves for your sorrowes say O what weaknesse is this to sit sobbing to lye tumbling to tosse in a tempestuous manner when God and Christ bids you to rejoyce Chide your selves for disparaging the Gospell for dishonouring Christ for disheartening others for all this you are guilty of by your dejected carriage rebuke your soules for their inordinate sorrowes Thirdly Informe them Preach to your selves these and the like points 1 All this sorrow doth no good It hath no profit in it What profit is there either for thy selfe or others in these thy dejections 2 This sorrow doth hurt it s as leannes to thy soule it s as a damp to and the deadnesse on duty tell your soules this sadnesse is mischievous it furthers despaire and it stifles joy Say it weakens as to worke and unfits as to comfort 3 Tell your soules Many have been as you are Doe you decay in grace so did others Doe you fall into sinne so doe many Are you deserted of Christ so was the Spouse O presse this point home there is no temptation befallen you but what is common to others Againe 4 Informe your soules that Christ would not have you to be cast downe Say to them Christ bids you be of good cheare hee 'l raise you up therefore why should you be cast downe Further 5 Tell your soules Satan laughs to see you sad and Saints mourne and say thus I am not to rejoyce Satan and to sadden Saints no I must not yet O how doth he rejoyce at your dejections He saith Aha Aha so would I have it whereas Saints cry Alas alas for what Saint is sad and disconsolate and all mourne not Lastly Informe your soules that it shall not be alwaies thus tell them you shall not alway sit disconsolate as a woman forsaken and grieved in spirit as t is Isay 54.6 No say unto your soule that you shall yet once againe see your God and Christ and that you shall yet praise him and sing upon your stringed Instrument to the chiefe Musitian i. e. the Lord Jesus Thus be directed in your dejections to argue or expostulate with your owne soules as David doth but withall remember to argue with God also so doth David likewise I will speake unto God my rock saith he so doe thou goe to God and humbly expostulate with him if thou art dejected by reason of a desertion go and say Why hast thou forgotten me Aske God why he eclipseth his face If thou art dejected by reason of temptation say Why goe I mourning by reason of the oppression of the enemy Thou maist be bold with God in Christs bloud therefore arise O cast downe soule and goe to God and argue out thy cause with him intreat him to take off his hand if it keep thee downe and beseech him to stretch forth his hand to