sight of our God whiles we have Christ put on upon us What ever therefore become of the outward man let it be my care that my soul be vested with my Lord Jesus so shall I be sure to be safe rich amiable here and hereafter glorious It was part of our Saviours charge upon the mount Take no care what to put on but it must be the main care of our lives how to put on Christ upon our souls This is the prime stole wherewith the father of the Prodigal graceth his returned son the heaven of heavens is not worth such another when I have once got this on my back I shall say though in a contrary sense with the Spouse in the Canticles I have put on my coat how shall I put it off I have washed my feet how shall I defile them XIIII With how devout passion doth the Psalmist call to all the works of the Almighty to praise him as well supposing that every creature even those that have no tongues to speak for themselves yet have a tongue to praise their Maker The heavens declare the glory of God and the firmament sheweth his handy work Day unto day uttereth speech and night unto night sheweth knowledg There is no speech nor language where their voyce is not heard neither is the very earth defective in this duty Every plant sayes look on me and acknowledg the life colour form smell fruit force that I have from the power of my Creator every worm and flie sayes look on me and give God the praise of my living sense and motion every bird sayes hear me and praise that God who hath given me these various feathers and taught me these several notes every beast whiles he bellows bleats brays barks roars sayes It is God that hath given me this shape this sound yea the very mute fishes are in their very silence vocal in magnifying the infinite wisdom and power of him that made them and placed them in those watery habitations Let every thing that hath breath saith the Psalmist praise the Lord. Yea the very winds whistle and the sea roars out the praise of the Almighty who both raises and allays them at pleasure what a shame were it for man to whom alone God hath given an understanding heart a nimble tongue and articulate language wherein he can express his rational thoughts to be wanting to this so universal devotion and to be as insensible of the great works of God as the ground that he treads upon If others shall be thus unthankfully dumb Yet praise thou the Lord O my soul and all that is within me bless his holy name whiles I live will I praise the Lord I will sing praises to my God whilest I have any being But alas Lord thou knowest I cannot so much as will to praise thee without thee do thou fill my heart with holy desires and my mouth with songs of thanksgiving XV. It may seem a strange errand upon which our Saviour tells us he came into the world I am come to send fire on the earth When the two fervent Disciples would have had fire sent down from Heaven upon but a Samaritan Village our Saviour rebuked them and told them they knew not of what spirit they were yet here he makes it his own business to send fire on the earth Alas may we think we have fire too much already how happy were it rather if the fire which is kindled in the world were well quenched and what is the main drift of the Prince of darkness but fire If not to send fire down from Heaven upon the inhabitants of the earth yet to send the inhabitants of the earth down to the fire of hell As then we finde divers kindes of material fire Celestial Elementary Domestique Artificial Natural so there is no less variety of spiritual fires It was in fiery cloven tongues wherein the Holy Ghost descended upon the Apostles in their Pentecost and even this fire did our Saviour come to send down on the earth Thy word was in mee as fire saith the Prophet and did not our harts burn within us said the two Disciples in their walk to Emaus whiles he talked with us This fire he also came to send Heavenly Love and holy Zeal are fire Many waters cannot quench love My zeal hath consumed me saith the Psalmist and these fires our Saviour came to send into the hearts of men holy thoughts are no other then the beams of celestial fire My heart was hot within me whiles I was musing the fire burned and these we know he sends He maketh his Angels spirits and his ministers a flame of fire These he sends forth to the earth to minister for them that shall be heirs of of salvation Besides these afflictions and persecutions are fire We have passed through fire and water Beloved think it not strange concerning the fiery tryal which is to try you as if some strange thing had happened to you and even these are of his sending The Lord hath kindled a fire in Zion and it hath devoured the foundations thereof There is no evil in the city but the Lord hath done it The Lord hath done that which he had devised he hath thrown down and not pitied But this expression of our Saviour goes yet deeper and alludes to the effect of Separation which follows upon the fire of our tryal When the lump of Oar is put into the furnace the fire tryes the pure mettal from the dross and makes an actual division of the one from the other so doth Christ by his Word and Spirit even he that is the Prince and God of Peace comes to set division in the world Surely there are holy quarrels worthy of his engagement for as the flesh lusteth and warreth against the spirit so the spirit fighteth against the flesh and this duel may well beseem God for the Author and the Son of God for the setter of it these second blows make an happy fray Nothing is more properly compared then discord to fire this Christ the first thing he does sets in every heart there is all quietness secure ease and self-contentment in the soul till Christ come there How should it be other when Satan sways all without resistance but when once Christ offers to enter there are straight civil wars in the soul betwixt the old man and the new and it fares with the heart as with an house divided in it self wherein the husband and the wife are at variance nothing is to be heard but unquiet janglings open brawlings secret opposition the houshold takes part and professes a mutual vexation This Spiritual self-division where ever it is though it be troublesom yet it is cordial it puts the soul into the state of Rebeccaâ—s womb which barren yielded no pain but when an Esau and Jacob were conceived and strugling within yielded for the time no ease
yet this was that which caused her just joy That she had not so much children as nations in her womb even so the trouble of this inward conflict is abundantly requited with the joy of this assurance That now Christ is come into our soul and is working his own desired ends in and upon us Let vain and sensual hearts please themselves in their inward peace and calmness there cannot be a greater signe of gracelesness and disfavor of God When they shall say Peace Peace then shall come upon them sudden destruction The old word was No safety in War here it is contrary It is this intestine war of the heart with fire and sword to our corruptions that must bring us true rest for the present and hereafter eternal peace and happiness Now Lord since it is thy desire that this fire should be kindled kindle thou and enflame my heart with a fervent desire and endeavor that this thy desire may be accomplished in me Set me at war with my self that I may be at peace with thee XVI In all that we have to do with God he justly requires and expects from us an awful disposition of heart towards his infiniteness hereupon it was that he delivered his Law in thunder fire smoke and all dreadful magnificence And when upon the same day he would send down his Spirit for the propagation of the Gospel it was done with an astonishing Majesty with a sound from Heaven as of a rushing mighty wind and with the apparition of cloven and fiery tongues And as it was thus in the descent of the Holy Ghost in the miraculous gifts so it is in the sanctifying Graces Seldom ever doth God by them seize upon the heart but with a vehement concussion going before That of S t Pauls conversion was extraordinary and miraculous but in some degree it is thus in every soul We are struck down first and are made sensible of our spiritual blindness ere our full call be accomplished as it was with Elijah in the Mount of Horeb There came first a strong wind that tore the Rocks and Mountains and after that an earth-quake then a fire before the still small voyce so it is usually in our brests ere the comfortable voyce of Gods Spirit speak to our hearts there must be some blustrings and flashes of the Law It is our honor and his favor that we are allowed to love God it is our duty to fear him We may be too familiar in our love we cannot be too awful in our fear XVII All valuations of these outward things are arbitrary according to the opinion of their pleasure or their rarity or the necessity of their use Did not mens mindes set a price upon mettals what were they better then some other entrails of the earth or one better then other If by publike law the mint were ordained to be onely supplyed by our stanneries how currantly would they pass for more precious then silver mines To an Indian a bracelet of worthless Beads is estimated above his Gold an hungry Esau values a mess of pottage above his birth-right In the siege of Samaria an Asses head was sold for fourscore peeces of silver and a Kab of Doves dung for five peeces We have heard that those of Angola have valued a Dog at the price of many slaves In all these earthly commodities the market rises and falls according to conceit and occasion neither is there any intrinsecal and setled worth in any of them onely Spiritual things as Vertue and Grace are good in themselves and so carry their infinite value in them that they make their owner absolutely rich and happy When therefore I see a rich man hugging his bags and admiring his wealth I look upon that man with pity as knowing the poorness of that pelf wherein he placeth his felicity neither can I behold him with other eyes then those wherewith a discreet European sees a savage Indian priding himself in those trifles which our children have learned to contemn On the other side when I see a man rich in the endowments of minde well-fraught with knowledg eminent in goodness and truly gracious I shall rise up to that man how homely so ever his outside be as the most precious and excellent peece which this world can afford XVIII Should I but see an Angel I should look with Manoah to dye no other death then the sight of that glory and yet even that Angel is fain to hide his face as not able to behold the infinite Majesty of God his Creator When Moses did but talk with God in the Mount for fourty days his face did so shine that the Israelites could not look upon the lustre of his countenance even the very presence of the Divine Majesty not onely hath but communicates glory Lord that I could see but some glimpse of the reflection of those glorious beams of thine upon my soul how happy should I be in this vision whose next degree is perfectly beatifical XIX As good so evil is apt to be communicative of it self and this so much more as it meets with subjects more capable of evil then good the breath of a plague-sick man taints the air round about him yea the very sight of blear eyes infects the sound and one yawning mouth stretcheth many jaws How many have we known that have been innocent in their retiredness miserably debaucht with leud conversation Next to being good is to consort with the vertuous It is the most merciful improvement of an holy power to separate the precious from the vile it is the highest praise of a constant goodness for a Lot to be righteous in the midst of Sodom XX. We are all apt to put off the blame of our miscarriages from our selves Even in paradise we did so It was the woman saith Adam it was the Serpent saith the woman How have we heard fond gamesters cast the blame of their ill luck upon the standers by which intermedled nothing but by a silent eye-sight So the idolatrous Pagans of old though flagitiously wicked yet could impute their publike judgments to none but the Christians whose onely innocence was their protection from utter ruine So foolishly partial doth our self-love render us to our own demerits that all are guilty save our selves Yea rather then we will want shifts our very stars shall be blamed which are no more accessary to our harms then our eyes are to the Eclipses of their most eminent Lights As on the contrary we are ready to arrogate unto our selves those blessings which the meer bounty of Divine Providence hath cast upon us whereto we could not contribute so much as an hand to receive them but by the mercy of the giver It cannot be well with me till I have learned to correct this palpable injustice in both challenging to my self all my errors and guilt of sufferings and yielding to God the praise his own free and gracious beneficence XXI How profitable and
the way through the golden gates of honor or down to the mines of wealth or to the flowry garden of pleasure but the way of true peace he knows not he no more knows the way to Heaven then if there were none The fool saith the Psalmist hath said in his heart there is no God Did not the wicked man say so he durst not wilfully sin in the face of so mighty and dreadful an avenger Lastly the fool is apt to part with his patrimony for some gay toys and how ready is the carnal heart to cast away the Favor of God the inheritance of Heaven the salvation of his soul for these vain earthly trifles Holy men are wont to pass with the world for Gods fools alas how little do these censurers know to pass a true judgment of wisdom and folly he that was rapt into the third Heaven tells us That the foolishness of God is wiser then men and the weakness of God stronger then men but this we are sure of that wicked men are the devils fools and that judgments are prepared for scorners and stripes for the back of fools XLVII There are some things which are laudable in man but cannot be incident into God as a bashful shamefastness and holy fear And there are some dispositions blame-worthy in men which are yet in a right sence holily ascribed unto God as unchangeableness and irrepentance Attributes and qualities receive their limitations according to the meet subjects to which they belong with this sure rule That whatsoever may import an infinite purity and perfection we have reason to ascribe to our Maker whatever may argue infirmitie misery corruption we have reason to take to our selves Neither is it otherwise in the condition of men One mans vertue is anothers vice so boldness in a woman bashfulness in an old man bounty in a poor man parsimony in the great are as foully unbeseeming as boldness in a Soldier bashfulness in a childe bounty in the rich parsimony in the poor are justly commendable It is not enough for us to know what is good in it self but what is proper for us else we may be blemished with that which is anothers honor XLVIII It is easie to observe that there are five degrees of the digestion of our spiritual food First it is received into the cell of the ear and there digested by a careful attention then it is conveyed into the brain and there concocted by due meditation from thence it is sent down into the heart and there digested by the affections and from thence it is conveyed to the tongue in conference and holy confession and lastly it is thence transmitted to the hand and there receives perfect digestion in our action and performance And as the life and health of the body cannot be maintained except the material food pass through all the degrees of bodily concoction no more can the soul live and prosper in the want of any of these spiritual degrees of digestion And as where the food is perfectly concocted the body grows fat and vigorous so is it with the soul where the spiritual repast is thus kindly digested Were there not failings in all these degrees the souls of men would not be so meager and unthriving as they are Some there are that will not give so much as ear-room to the word of truth such are willing recusants others will admit it perhaps so far but there let it rest these are fashionable auditors some others can be content to let it enter into the brain and take up some place in their thoughts and memories these are speculative professors some but fewer others let it down into their hearts and there entertain it with secret liking but hide it in their bosomes not daring to make profession of it to the world these are close Nicodemians Others take it into their mouthes and busie their tongues in holy chat yet do nothing these are formal discoursers But alas how few are there whose hands speak louder then their tongues that conscionably hear meditate affect speak do the word of their Maker and Redeemer XLIX Men that are in the same condition speed not always alike Barabbas was a theif murderer seditionary and deserved hanging no less then the two theeves that were crucified with our Saviour yet he is dismissed and they executed And even of these two as our Saviour said of the two women grinding at the mill one was taken the other refused one went before Peter to paradise the other went before Judas into hell The providence and election of a God may make a difference we have no reason in the same crime to presume upon a contrary issue If that gracious hand shall exempt us from the common judgment of our consorts in evil we have cause 〈◊〉 less his mercy but if his just hand shall sweep us away in the company of our wicked consociates we have reason to thank none but our selves for our sufferings L. How sweet a thing is revenge to us naturally even the very infant rejoyces to see him beaten that hath angerd him and is ready with his little hand to give that sroke to the by-stander which he would have with more force returned to the offender and how many have we known in mortal quarrels cheerfully bleeding out their last drop when they have seen their enemy gasping and dying before them This alone shews how much there is remaining in our bosome of the sting of that old Serpent who was a murderer from the beginning delighting in death and enjoying our torment whereas on the contrary true grace is merciful ready to forgive apt to return good for evil to pray for our persecutors Nothing doth more clearly evince what spirit we are of then our disposition in wrongs received The carnal heart breathes nothing but revenge and is straight wringing the sword out of the hands of him that hath said Vengeance is mine The regenerate soul contrarily gives place to wrath and puts on the bowels of mercies kindness humbleness of minde meekness long suffering forbearing forgiving and will not be overcome with evil but overcomes evil with good We have so much of God as we can remit injuries so much of Satan as we would revenge them LI. It is worth observing how nature hath taught all living creatures to be their own physitians The same power that gave them a being hath led them to the means of their own preservation No Indian is so savage but that he knows the use of his Tobacco and Contra-yerva yea even the brute creatures are bred with this skill The Dog when he is stomack-sick can go right to his proper Grass the Cat to her Nep the Goat to his Hemlock the Weasel to Rue the Hart to Dittany the sick Lyon can cure himself with an Ape the Monkey with a Spider the Bear with an Ant-heap the Panther with mans dung and the Stork is said to have taught man the
flesh but for him God took him and cloathed him living with immortality I finde none but him and Elijah that were thus fetcht to their Heaven It will be happy for us if we may pass in the common road to blessedness O God give me to walk close and constantly with thee and what end thou pleasest let my body pass through all the degrees of corruption so that my soul may be immediately glorious FINIS THE BREATHINGS OF THE Devout Soul I. BLessed Lord God thou callest me to obedience and fain would I follow thee but what good can this wretched heart of mine be capable of except thou put it there thou know'st I cannot so much as wish to think well without thee I have strong powers to offend thee my sins are my own but whence should I have any inclination to good but from thee who art only and all good Lord work me to what thou requirest and then require what thou wilt II. Lord God whither need I go to seek thee Thou art so with me as that I cannot move but in thee I look up to heaven there I know thy Majestie most manifests it self but withall I know that being here thou art never out of thy heaven for it is thy presence onely that makes heaven Oh give me to enjoy thee in this lowest region of thine heavenly habitation and as in respect of my naturall being I live and move in thee so let me not live and move spiritually but with thee and to thee III. Whither now O whither do ye rove O my thoughts Can ye hope to finde rest in any of these sublunary contentments Alas how can they yeeld any stay to you that have no settlement in themselves Is there not enough in the infinite good to take you up but that ye will be wandring after earthly vanities Oh my Lord how justly mightest thou cast me off with scorn for casting any affective glances upon so base a rival Truly Lord I am ashamed of this my hatefull inconstancy but it is thou only that must remedy it O thou that art the father of mercies pity my wildnesse and weak distractions Take thou my heart to thee it is thine own keep it with thee tye it close to thee by the cords of love that it may not so much as cast down an eye upon this wretched and perishing world IIII. Lord I confesse to my shame thou art a great loser by me for besides my not improving of thy favors I have not kept even-reckonings with thee I have not justly tallied up thy inestimable benefits Thy very privative mercies are both without and beyond my account for every evill that I am free from is a new blessing from thee That I am out of bondage that I am out of pain and misery that I am out of the dominion of sin out of the tyranny of Satan out of the agonies of an afflicted soul out of the torments of hell Lord how unspeakeable mercies are these Yet when did I bless thee for any of them Thy positive bounties I can feel but with a benummed and imperfect sence Lord do thou enlarge and intenerate my heart make me truly sensible as of my good received so of my escaped evils and take thou to thy self the glory of them both V. Ah my Lord God what heats and colds do I feel in my soul Sometimes I finde my self so vigorous in grace that no thought of doubt dare shew it self and me thinks I durst challenge my hellish enemies another while I feel my self so dejected and heartlesse as if I had no interest in the God of my salvation nor never had received any certain pledges of his favour What shall I say to this various disposition Whether Lord is it my wretchednesse to suffer my self to be rob'd of thee for the time by temptation or whether is this the course of thy proceedings in the dispensation of thy graces to the sons of men that thou wilt have the breathings of thy Spirit as where so how and when thou pleasest Surely O my God if I did not know thee constant to thine everlasting mercies I should be utterly disheartened with these sad intervals now when my sense failes me I make use of my faith and am no lesse sure of thee even when I feel thee not then when I finde the clearest evidences of thy gracious presence Lord shine upon me with the light of thy countenance if it may be alwaies but when ever that is clouded strengthen thou my faith so shall I be safe even when I am comfortless VI. O my God I am justly ashamed to think what favors I have received from thee and what poor returns I have made to thee Truly Lord I must needs say thou hast thought nothing either in earth or in heaven too good for me and I on the other side have grudg'd thee that weak and worthless obedience which thou hast required of me Alas what pleasure could I have done to thee who art infinite if I had sacrificed my whole self to thee as thou commandest Thou art and wilt be thy self though the world were not it is I I only that could be a gainer by this happy match which in my own wrong I have unthankfully neglected I see it is not so much what we have as how we imploy it O thou that hast been so bountiful in heaping thy rich mercies upon me vouchsafe to grant me yet one gift more give me grace and power to improve all thy gifts to the glory of the giver otherwise it had been better for me to have been poor then ingrateful VII Ah Lord What strugling have I with my weak fears how do I anticipate my evils by distrust What shall I do when I am old How shall I be able to indure pain How shall I pass through the horrid gates of death Oh my God Where is my faith that I am thus surprized Had I not thee to up-hold and strengthen my soul well might I tremble and sink under these cares but now that I have the assurance of so strong an helper as commands all the powers of heaven earth and hell what a shame is it for me to give so much way to my wretched infidelity as to punish my self with the expectation of future evils Oh for the victorie that overcomes the world even our faith Thou O God art my refuge and strength a very present help in trouble therefore will I not fear though the earth be removed and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the Sea VIII Lord I made account my daies should have been but an inch but thou hast made them a span long having drawn out the length of a crazie life beyond the period of my hopes It is for something sure that thou hast thus long respited me from my grave which look't for me many years ago Here I am O my God attending thy good pleasure Thou know'st best what thou hast to do
so long with thee not of thy raigning on earth so long with those Martyrs How busie are the tongues of men how are their brains taken up with the indeterminable construction of this enigmaticall truth when in the mean time the care of thy spirituall raign in their hearts is neglected O my Saviour whiles others weary themselves with the disquisition of thy personall raign here upon earth for a thousand years let it be the whole bent and study of my soul to make sure of my personall raign with thee in heaven to all eternity XVI Blessed be thy name O God who hast made a good use even of hell it self How many Atheous hearts have been convinced by the very operations of Devils Those which would with the stupid Saducees perswade themselves there are no spirits yet when they have sensibly found the marvellous effects wrought even by the base instruments of Satan they have been forced to confesse Doubtless there is a God that rules the world for so great powers of evill spirits must necessarily evince the greater powers of good It is of thy wise and holy dispensation that thy good Angels do not so frequently exhibite themselves and give so visible demonstrations of their presence to thy Saints as the evill Angels do to their Vassals though they are ever as present and more powerfull What need they when thou so mightily over-rulest those malignant spirits that thou forcest from them thine own glory and advantage to thy chosen Lord how much more shall all thy other creatures serve to thy praise when thy very hellish enemies shall proclaim thy justice goodness omnipotence XVII Speculation O Lord is not more easie then practice is difficult how many have we known who as it was said of the Philosophers of old know how to speak well but live ill How many have written books of Chymistry and given very confident directions for the finding out of that precious stone of the Philosophers but how many have indeed made gold Practice is that which thou O God chiefly requirest and respectest who hast said If ye know these things blessed are ye if you do them Knowledg puffeth up but love edifieth O Lord do thou enlighten mine eyes with the knowledg of thy will but above all do thou rectifie my affections guide my feet into the wayes of thy commandements apply my heart to fulfill thy statutes alway and Prosper thou the work of my hands upon me O prosper thou my handi-work XVIII How oft have I wondred O Lord at the boldness of those men who knowing they must shortly die yet dare do those things which will draw upon them eternity of torments What shall I say but The fool hath said in his heart there is no God Surely men love themselves well enough and would be loth to do that which would procure them an inevitable misery and pain Did they therefore believe there were another world and that they must be called to a strict reckoning for all their actions and be doomed to an everlasting death for their wicked deeds they durst not they could not do those acts which should make them eternally miserable Let me say to the most desperate ruffian there is poyson in this cup drink this draught and thou diest he would have the wit to keep his lips close and cast the potion to the ground were it not for their infidelity so would men do to the most plausible but deadly offers of sin O Lord since I know thy righteous judgments teach me to tremble at them restrain thou my feet from every evill way and teach me so to walk as one that looks every hour to appear before thy just and dreadfull Tribunal XIX The longer I live O my God the more do I wonder at all the works of thine hands I see such admirable artifice in the very least and most despicable of all thy creatures as doth every day more and more astonish my observation I need not look so far as Heaven for matter of marvaile though therein thou art infinitely glorious whiles I have but a spider in my window or a bee in my garden or a worm under my feet every one of these overcomes me with a just amazement yet can I see no more then their very out-sides their inward form which gives them their being and operations I cannot pierce into the less I can know O Lord the more let me wonder and the less I can satisfie my self with marvailing at thy works the more let me adore the majesty and omnipotence of thee that wroughtest them XX. Alas my Lord God what poor weak imperfit services are those even at the best that I can present thee withal How leane lame and blemished sacrifices do I bring to thine altar I know thou art worthy of more then my soul is capable to perform and fain would I tender thee the best of thine own but what I would that I do not yea cannot do Surely had I not to do with an infinite mercy I might justly look to be punished for my very obedience But now Lord my impotence redounds to the praise of thy goodness for were I more answerable to thy justice the glory of thy mercy would be so much less eminent in my remission acceptance Here I am before thee to await thy good pleasure thou knowest whether it be better to give me more ability or to accept of that poor ability thou hast given me but since when thou hast given me most I shall still and ever stand in need of thy forgiveness Let my humble suit be to thee alwaies rather for pardon of my defects then for a supply of thy graces XXI O my God how do I see many profane and careless souls spend their time in jollity and pleasure The harp and the Viol the Tabret and the pipe and wine are in their feasts Whiles I that desire to walk close with thee in all conscionable obedience droop and languish under a dull heaviness and heartless dejection I am sure I have a thousand times more cause of joy and cheerfulness then the merriest of all those wilde and joviall spirits they have a world to play withall but I have a God to rejoyce in their sports are triviall and momentanie my joy is serious and everlasting One dram of my mirth is worth a pound of theirs But I confesse O Lord how much I am wanting to my self in not stirring up this holy fire of spirituall joy but suffering it to lie raked up under the dead ashes of a sad neglect O thou who art the God of hope quicken this heavenly affection in my soul and fill me with all joy and peace in believing make my heart so much more light then the worldlings by how much my estate is happier XXII What shall I do Lord I strive and tug what I may with my naturall corruptions and with the spirituall wickednesses in high places which set upon my soul
we all lie down in our bed of earth as sure to wake as ever we can be to shut our eyes In and from thee O blessed Saviour is this our assurance who art the first fruits of them that sleep The first handfull of the first fruits was not presented for it self but for the whole field wherein it grew The vertue of that oblation extended it self to the whole crop Neither didst thou O blessed Jesu rise again for thy self only but the power and vertue of thy resurrection reaches to all thine so thy chosen Vessel tels us Christ the first fruits afterwards they that are Christs at his coming So as though the resurrection be of all the dead both just and unjust yet to rise by the power of thy resurrection is so proper to thine own as that thou O Saviour hast styled it the resurrection of the just whiles the rest shall be drag'd out of their graves by the power of thy God-head to their dreadful judgment Already therefore O Jesu are we risen in thee and as sure shall rise in our own persons The Loco-motive faculty is in the head Thou who art our head art risen we who are thy members must and shall follow Say then O my dying body say boldly unto Death Rejoyce not over me O mine enemy for though I fall yet I shall rise again Yea Lord the vertue of thy first fruits diffuseth it self not to our rising only but to a blessed immortality of these bodies of ours for as thou didst rise immortall and glorious so shall we by and with thee Who shalt change these vile bodies and make them like to thy glorious body The same power that could shake off death can put on glory and Majesty Lay thee down therefore O my body quietly and cheerfully and look to rise in another hue Thou art sown in corruption thou shalt be raised in incorruption thou art sown in dishonour thou shalt be raised in glory thou art sown in weaknesse but shalt be raised in power XXXVI In this life in this death of the body O Lord I see there are no degrees though differences of time The man that dyed yesterday is as truly dead as Abel the first man that dyed in the world and Methuselah that lived nine hundred sixty nine years did not more truly live then the childe that did but salute and leave the world but in the life to come and the second death there are degrees degrees of blessedness to the glorified degrees of torments to the damned the least whereof is unspeakable unconceivable Oh thou that art the Lord of life and death keep my soul from those steps that go down to the chambers of death and once set it for higher I dare not sue to go but over the threshold of glory and blessedness XXXVII O Lord my God I am as very a Pilgrime as ever walked upon thy earth Why should I look to be in any better condition then my neighbours then my forefathers Even the best of them that were most fixed upon their inheritance were no other then strangers at home It was not in the power of the world to naturalize them much less to make them enroll themselves free-Denizons here below they knew their country which they sought was above so infinitely rich and pleasant that these earthly regions which they must pass thorough are in comparison worthy of nothing but contempt My condition is no other then theirs I wander here in a strange country What wonder is it if I meet with forrainers fare hard usage and neglect Why do I intermeddle with the affaires of a nation that is not mine Why do I clog my self in my way with the base and heavy lumber of the world Why are not my affections homeward Why do I not long to see and enjoy my fathers house O my God thou that hast put me into the state of a Pilgrim give me a Pilgrims heart set me off from this wretched world wherein I am let me hate to think of dwelling here Let it be my only care how to pass through this miserable wilderness to the promised land of a blessed eternitie XXXVIII One Talent at the least O Lord hast thou put into my hand and that sum is great to him that is not worth a dram but alas what have I done with it I confess I have not hid it in a napkin but have been laying it out to some poor advantage yet surely the gain is so unanswerable that I am afraid of an Audit I see none of the approved servants in the Gospel brought in an increase of less value then the receit I fear I shall come short of the sum O thou who justly holdest thy self wronged with the style of an austere master vouchsafe to accept of my so mean improvement and thou who valuedst the poor widows mites above the rich gifts cast into thy Treasurie be pleased to allow of those few pounds that my weak indevors could raise from thy stock and mercifully reward thy servant not according to his success but according to his true intentions of glorifying thee XXXIX What a word is this which I hear from thee O Saviour Behold I stand at the doore and knock Thou which art the Lord of life God blessed for ever to stand and knock at the door of a sinful heart Oh what a praise is this of thy mercy and long suffering What a shame to our dull neglect and graceless ingratitude For a David to say I waited patiently upon the Lord Truly my soul waiteth upon God it is but meet and comely for it is no other then the duty of the greatest Monarchs on earth yea of the highest Angels in Heaven to attend their Maker but for thee the great God of Heaven to wait at the door of us sinful dust and ashes what a condescension is this what a longanimity It were our happiness O Lord if upon our greatest suit and importunity we might have the favor to entertain thee into our hearts but that thou shouldst importune us to admit thee and shouldst wait at the posts of our doors till thine head be filled with dew and thy locks with the drops of the night it is such a mercy as there is not room enough in our souls to wonder at In the mean time what shall I say to our wretched unthankfulnes and impious negligence Thou hast graciously invited us to thee and hast said knock and it shall be opened and yet thou continuest knocking at our doors and we open not willingly delaying to let in our happiness we know how easie it were for thee to break open the brasen doors of our brests and to come in but the Kingdome of Heaven suffers not violence from thee though it should suffer it from us Thou wilt do all thy works in a sweet and gracious way as one who will not force but win love Lord I cannot open unless thou that
a deep study fixed our eyes upon that which we the while thought not upon neither perceived that we saw So doth the Christian to these worldly glories pleasures profits whiles his minde and affections are on the things above where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God There Lord let me behold those things which cannot yet be seen but shall once in the sight of them make me blessed And let me not look on the things that are seen for the things that are seen are temporary but the things which are not seen are eternal XIII There is not more strangeness then significance in that charge of the Apostle That we should put on the Lord Jesus Christ The soul is as it were a body not really and properly so according to the gross error of Tertullian but by way of allusion This body of the soul then may not be naked but must be clad as our first parents were ashamed of their bodily nakedness and so still are all their not savage posterity so may we of our spiritual Every sinner is naked those rags that he hath are so far from hiding his nakedness that they are part of it his fairest moralities are but glittering sins and his sins are his nakedness Aaron had made Israel naked to their shame not so much in that they were stripped of their earings as that they were enwrapped in the sin of idolatry No marvel if we run away and hide us from the presence of God as our first parents did whiles we are guilty to our selves of our Spiritual deformity As then we are bodily naked when we come into the world so we are spiritually naked whiles we are of the world neither can it be either safe or comely for us till we be covered There is no clothing can fit the soul but the Lord Jesus Christ all other robes in the wardrobe of Earth or Heaven are too short too straight like those which the scorn of Hanun put upon Davids messengers reaching but to the hams for though the soul of man be finite the sin of the soul is scarce so and that sin must be covered else there can be no safety for the soul according to that of the Psalmist Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven whose sin is covered None therefore but the robes of an infinite Righteousness can cover the soul so wofully dressed none therefore but the Lord Jesus Christ who is God blessed for ever can cover the soul that it may not appear unrighteous or can cleanse the soul that it may not be unrighteous and cleansed it must be ere the Lord Jesus can be put on We shall wrong his perfit holiness if we think we can slip him on as a case over our beastly rags It is with us as with Joshua the high Priest The filthy garments must first be taken off and then the Lord shall say unto us Behold I have caused thine iniquity to pass from thee and I will clothe thee with change of rayment We put on a garment when we apply it all over to our body so as that part which is clothed appears not but is defended from the air and from the eye if we have truely put on the Lord Jesus nothing of ours is seen but Christ is all in all to us although this application goes yet deeper for we so put him on that we not onely put our selves into him but also put him into our selves by a mutual kinde of Spiritual incorporation We put him on then upon our Intellectual parts by knowing him by beleeving on him This is eternal life to know thee and whom thou hast sent saith our Saviour and for Faith no grace doth so sensibly apprehend him and make him so feelingly ours We put him on upon our wills and affections when we take pleasure in him when we love him delight in him and prefer him to our chiefest joy Thus do we put him on as our Lord in our humble and dutiful subjection as our Jesus in our faithful affiance as Christ the anointed of God to be our King in all holy obedience our Priest in our willing consecration to him our Prophet in our cheerful readiness to be instructed by him How happy are we if we be thus decked we prank up these poor carcasses of ours gaily with no small expence and when we have done the stuff or the fashion or both wears out to nothing But here is a garment that will never be out of fashion Jesus Christ yesterday and to day and the same for ever yea the same to us here we put him on in Grace there in eternal Glory The Israelites were fourty years in the wilderness yet their shooes not worn their apparel not impaired but this attire shall not onely hold good in the time of our wandring in this desart but after we are come into the Canaan of glory and is best at last Wherefore do we put on our choisest attire on some high days but to testifie the cheerfulness of our hearts Let thy garment be white saith the Preacher for now God accepteth thy works Mephibosheth changed not his raiment since David went out as one that would have the sorrow of his heart seen in the neglect of his clothes although many a one under a gay coat hath an heavy heart but this attire doth not onely testifie but make cheerfulness in the soul Thou hast given me more joy of heart then they had in the time that their corn and their wine increased and In thy presence is the fulness of joy what can this apparel of ours do but keep us from a blast or a showre it is so far from safeguarding the soul that it many times wounds it and that to the death It was one of the main quarrels against the rich glutton that he was every day clothed in purple and byss How many souls shall once wish that their bodies had been ever either naked or clad with hair-cloth But this aray as it is infinitely rich and beautiful so it is as surely defensative of the soul and is no less then armor of proof against all assaults all miseries What a deal of cost and pains do we bestow upon these wretched bodies of ours onely to make them pleasing and lovely to the eye of some beholders as miserable perhaps as our selves and yet when we have all done we are it may be no better then hard-favord and unhandsome creatures and contemptible in those eyes from whom we desired most approbation Jezebel for all her licking is cast out of the window and troden to dirt in the streets But this robe we can not wear and not be amiable in the eyes of the holiest Behold thou art fair my beloved behold thou art fair and there is no spot in thee Lo in this case the apparel makes the man neither is it in the power of any spiritual deformity to make us other then lovely in the
St. James is tempted when he is drawn away of his own lust and enticed then when lust hath conceived it bringeth forth sin and sin when it is finished bringeth forth death Lo both the lust and the seducement are our own the sin is ours the death ours There are indeed diabolical suggestions which are immediatly cast into us by that wicked one but there are carnal tentations that are raised out of our own corrupt nature these need not his immediate hand he was the maine agent in our depravation but being once depraved we can act evil of our selves And if Satan be the father of sin our will is the mother and sin is the cursed issue of both He could not make our sin without our selves we concur to our own undoing It was the charge of the Apostle That we should not give place to the Devil Lo he could not take it unless we gave it our will betrays us to his tyranny in vain shall we cry out of the malice and fraud of wicked spirits whiles we nourish their complices in our bosomes XXXVI I cannot but think with what unspeakable joy old Simeon dyed when after long waiting for the consolation of Israel he had now seen the Lords Christ when I hear him say Lord now lettest thou thy servant depart in peace according to thy word for mine eyes have seen thy salvation Methinks I should see his soul ready to flie out of his mouth in an heavenly ravishment and even then upon its wing towards its glory for now his eyes saw and his arms embraced in Gods salvation his own in Israels glory his own How gladly doth he now see death when he hath the Lord of life in his bosome or how can he wish to close up his eyes with any other object yet when I have seriously considered it I cannot see wherein our condition comes short of his He saw the childe Jesus but in his swathing-bands when he was but now entering upon the great work of our redemption we see him after the full accomplishment of it gloriously triumphing in Heaven He saw him but buckling on his armor and entring into the lists we see him victorious Who is this that cometh from Edom with dyed garments from Bozra this that is glorious in his apparel traveling in the greatness of his strength mighty to save He could onely say To us a childe is born to us a son is given We can say Thou hast ascended on high thou hast led captivity captive thou hast received gifts for men It is true the difference is he saw his Saviour with bodily eyes we with mental but the eyes of our Faith are no less sure and unfailing then those of Sense Lord why should not I whose eyes have no less seen thy salvation say Now let thy servant depart not in peace onely but in a joyful sence of my instant glory XXXVII When I think on my Saviour in his agony and on his cross my soul is so clouded with sorrow as if it would never be clear again those bloody drops and those dreadful ejulations methinks should be past all reach of comfort but when I see his happy eluctation out of these pangs and hear him cheerfully rendring his spirit into the hands of his Father when I finde him trampling upon his grave attended with glorious Angels and ascending in the chariot of a cloud to his Heaven I am so elevated with joy as that I seem to have forgotten there was ever any cause of greif in those sufferings I could be passionate to think O Saviour of thy bitter and and ignominious death and most of all of thy vehement struglings with thy fathers wrath for my sake but thy conquest and glory takes me off and calls me to Hallelujahs of joy and triumph Blessing honor glory and power be unto him that sitteth upon the Throne and unto the Lamb for ever and ever XXXVIII It is not hard to observe that the more holy any person is the more he is afflicted with others sin Lot vexed his righteous soul with the unclean conversation of the Sodomites Davids eyes gush't out rivers of water because men kept not the Law Those that can look with dry and undispleased eyes upon anothers sin never truly mourned for their own Had they abhorred sin as sin the offence of a God would have been grievous to them in whomsoever It is a godless heart that doth not finde it self concerned in Gods quarrel and that can laugh at that which the God of Heaven frowns at my soul is nearest to me my sorrow therefore for my sin must begin at home but it may not rest there from thence it shall diffuse it self all the world over Who is offended and I burn not who offendeth and I weep not XXXIX The world little considers the good advantage that is made of sins surely the whole Church of God hath reason to bless God for Thomas his unbelief not in the act which was odious after so good assurances but in the issue his doubt proves our evidence and his confession after his touch had convinced him was more noble then his incredulity was shameful All his attendance upon Christ had not taught him so much divinity as this one touch Often had he said my Lord but never my God till now Even Peters confession though rewarded with the change of his name came short of this The flame that is beaten down by the blast of the bellowes rises higher then otherwise it would and the spring water that runs level in the Plain yet if it fall low it will therefore rise high the shaken tree roots the deeper Not that we should sin that grace may abound God forbid he can never hope to be good that will be therefore ill that he may be the better but that our holy zeal should labor to improve our miscarriages to our spiritual gain and the greater glory of that Majesty whom we have offended To be bettered by grace it is no mastery but to raise more holiness out of sin is a noble imitation of that holy God who brings light out of darkness life out of death XL. Every man best knows his own complaints we look upon the outsides of many whom we think happy who in the meane time are secretly wrung with the inward sense of their own concealed sorrows and under a smooth and calm countenance smother many a tempest in their bosome There are those whose faces smile whiles their conscience gripes them closely within There are those that can dissemble their poverty and domestick vexations reserving their sighs till their back be turned that can pick their teeth abroad when they are fasting and hungry at home and many a one forces a song when his heart is heavy No doubt Naomi made many a short meal after her return to Bethlehem yet did not whine to her great kinred in a bemoaning of her want And good Hannah bit in many a grief
holy Spirit they could never think they had enough and whiles they do think so they are utterly uncapable of either having or desiring more As there is a sinful so there is an holy covetousness which the more it hath the more it affects Lord make me thus covetous and I cannot chuse but be rich XLIII What a marvelous familiarity was this which Moses had with God That the Lord spake unto Moses face to face as a man speaketh to his friend and yet more that Moses so spake to God! what a bold and high request was that which Moses made to God I beseech thee shew me thy glory that is as it is there interpreted thy face that face which no man might see and live Lo God had immediately before spoken to Moses even to his face out of the cloudy pillar that doth not satisfie his holily-ambitious soul but as he heard the voyce so he must see the face of the Almighty That cloudy pillar did sufficiently represent unto him the presence of the great God of Israel yet still he sues for a sight of his glory This is no patern for flesh and blood far be it from our thoughts to aspire so high Thy face O God will we seek but in thy blessed ordinances not in thy glorious and incomprehensible essence It is not for me as yet to presume so far as to desire to see that infinite light which thou art or that light wherewith thou art cloathed or that light inaccessible wherein thou dwelest Onely now shew me the light of thy countenance in grace and prepare my soul for that light of glory when I shall see as I am seen XLIV In the waters of life the divine Scriptures there are shallows and there are deeps shallows where the lamb may wade and deeps where the Elephant may swim If we be not wise to distinguish we may easily mis-carry he that can wade over the foord cannot swim through the deep and if he mistake the passage he drowns What infinite mischeif hath arisen to the Church of God from the presumption of ignorant and unlettered men that have taken upon them to interpret the most obscure Scriptures and pertinaciously defended their own sense How contrary is this to all practise in whatsoever vocation In the Taylors trade every man can stitch a seam but every man cannot cut out a garment In the Saylers art every one may be able to pull at a cable but every one cannot guide the helm In the Physitians profession every gossip can give some ordinary receits upon common experience but to finde the nature of the disease and to prescribe proper remedies from the just grounds of art is proper to the professors of that science and we think it absurd and dangerous to allow every ignorant Mountebank to practise In matter of law every plain country-man knows what belongs to distraining impounding replevying but to give sound counsel to a clyent in a point of difficulty to draw firm conveyances to plead effectually and to give sound judgment in the hardest cases is for none but Barristers and Benchers And shall we think it safe that in Divinity which is the mistress of all Sciences and in matters which may concern the eternal safety of the soul every man should take upon him to shape his own coat to steer his own way to give his own dose to put and adjudg his own case The old word was that Artists are worthy to be trusted in their own trade Wherefore hath God given to men skill in arts and tongues Wherefore do the aptest wits spend their times and studies from their infancy upon these sacred imployments if men altogether inexpert in all the grounds both of art and language can be able to pass as sound a judgment in the depths of Theological truths as they How happy were it if we could all learn according to that word of the Apostle to keep our selves within our own line As Christians the Scriptures are ours but to use to enjoy to read to hear to learn to meditate to practise not to interpret according to our private conceit for this faculty we must look higher The Priests lips are to preserve knowledg and they shall seek the Law at his mouth for he is the messenger of the Lord of hosts XLV When we see the year in his prime and pride decked with beautiful blossoms and all goodly varieties of flowers cheered with the Musick of birds and stated in a sweet and moderate temper of heat and cold how glad we are that we have made so good an exchange for an hard and chilling winter and how ready we could be to wish that this pleasant and happy season might last all the year long But herein were our desires satisfied we should wish to our own great disadvantage for if the spring were not followed with an intension of Summers heat those fruits whose hopes we see in the bud and flower could never come to any perfection and even that succeeding fervor if it should continue long would be no less prejudicial to the health and life of all creatures and if there were not a relaxation of that vigorous heat in Autumn so as the sap returns back into the root we could never look to see but one years fruit And thus also it is spiritually if our prosperity were not intermixed with vicissitudes of crosses and if the lively beams of grace were not sometimes interchanged with cold desertions we should never know what belongs to spiritual life What should we do then but be both patient of and thankful for our changes and make no account of any constancy till we attain to the Region of rest and blessedness XLVI What fools doth the devil make of those men which would fain otherwise be accounted wise who would think that men could be so far forsaken of their reason as to fall down before those stocks and stones which their own hands had carved to guide their enterprises by the fond auguries of the flying or posture or noyse of fowls or the inspection of the entrails of beasts to tye the confidence of their success to certain scrawls and characters which themselves have devised to read their own or others fortunes in their hands or stars to suffer themselves mocked with deceitful visions neither are his spiritual delusions less gross and palpable wise Solomon speaks of the wickedness of folly and we may no less truly invert it the folly of wickedness the fool saith our Saviour builds his house upon the sand so as it may be washt away with the next waves what other doth the foolish worldling that builds all his hopes upon uncertain riches momentany pleasures deceitful favors The fool saith Solomon walketh in darkness the sinner walks in the darkness of ignorance through the works of darkness to the pit of darkness The fool saith the Preacher knows not the way into the city The worldling may perhaps hit
in mount Sinai that thunder and rain wherewith God answered the prayer of Samuel in wheat-harvest for Israels conviction in the unseasonable suit for their King that thundering voyce from Heaven that answered the prayer of the Son of God for the glorifying of his Name the seven thunders that uttered their voyces to the beloved Disciple in Pathmos had nothing of ordinary nature in them And how many have we heard and read of That for sleighting of this great work of God have at once heard his voyce and felt his stroke Shortly if any heart can be unmoved at this mighty voyce of God it is stiffer then the rocks in the wilderness for The voyce of the Lord shaketh the wilderness the Lord shaketh the wilderness of Kadesh For me I tremble at the power whiles I adore the mercy of that great God that speaks so loud to me It is my comfort that he is my Father who approves himself thus omnipotent his love is no less infinite then his power let the terror be to them that know him angry let my confidence overcome my fear It is the Lord let him do what he will All is not right with me till I have attained to tremble at him while he shineth and to rejoyce in him whiles he thundreth LX. We talk of mighty warriors that have done great exploits in conquering kingdoms but the Spirit of God tells us of a greater conquest then all theirs Whatsoever is born of God overcometh the world and this is the victory that overcometh the world even our faith Alass the conquest of those great Commanders was but poor and partial of some small spots of the earth the conquest of a regenerate Christian is universal of the whole world Those other conquerors whiles they prevailed abroad were yet overcome at home and whiles they were the Lords of nations were no other then vassals to their own lusts These begin their victories at home and enlarge their Triumphs over all their spiritual enemies The glory of those other victors was laid down with their bodies in the dust the glory that attends these is eternal What pity it is that the true Christian should not know his own greatness that he may raise his thoughts accordingly and bear himself as one that tramples the world under his feet For all that is in the world is the lust of the flesh the lust of the eyes and the pride of life these he hath truly subdued in himself not so as to bereave them of life but of rule if he have left them some kinde of being still in him yet he hath left them no dominion and therefore may well stile himself the Lord of the world Far far therefore be it from him that he should so abject and debase himself as to be a slave to his vassals none but holy and high thoughts and demeanors may now beseem him and in these spiritual regards of his inward greatness and self-conquests his word must be either Cesar or nothing LXI I see so many kindes of phrensies in the world and so many seemingly wise brains taken with them that I much doubt whom I may be sure to account free from either the touch or at least the danger of this indisposition How many opinions do I see raised every day that argue no less then a meer spiritual madness such as if they should have been but mentioned seven years ago would have been questioned out of what Bedlam they had broken loose And for dispositions how do we see one so ragingly furious as if he had newly torn off his chaines and escaped another so stupidly senseless that you may thrust pins into him up to the head and he startles not at it One so dumpishly sad as if he would freez to death in melancholy and hated any contentment but in sorrow another so apishly jocund as if he cared for no other pastime then to play with feathers One so superstitiously devout that he is ready to cringe and crouch to every stock another so wildly prophane that he is ready to spit God in the face shortly one so censorious of others as if he thought all men mad but himself another so mad as that he thinks himself and all mad men sober and well-witted In this store and variety of distempers were I not sure of my own principles I could easily misdoubt my self now setled on firm grounds I can pity and bewail the woful distraction of many and can but send them for recovery to that divine wisdom who calls to them in the openings of the gates and uttereth her words saying How long ye silly ones will ye love simplicity and the scorners delight in their scorning and fools hate knowledg turn you at my reproof O ye simple understand wisdom and ye fools be ye of an understanding heart Blessed is the man that heareth me watching daily at my gaâ—es But he that sinneth against me wrongeth his own soul all they that hate me love death LXII Man as he confists of a double nature flesh and spirit so is he placed in a middle rank betwixt an angel which is spirit and a beast which is flesh partaking of the qualities and performing the acts of both he is angelical in his understanding in his sensual affections beastial and to whether of these he most enclineth and conformeth himself that part wins more of the other and gives a denomination to him so as he that was before half angel half beast if he be drowned in sensuality hath lost the angel and is become a beast if he be wholly taken up with heavenly Meditations he hath quit the beast and is improved angelical It is hard to hold an equal temper either he must degenerate into a beast or be advanced to an angel meer reason sufficiently apprehends the difference of the condition Could a beast be capable of that faculty he would wish to be a man rather then a brute as he is There is not more difference betwixt a man and beast then between an angel and a brutish man How must I needs therefore be worse then beast if when I may be preferred to that happy honor I shall rather affect to be a beast then an angel Away then with the bestial delights of the sensual appetite let not my soul sink in this mud let me be wholly for those intellectual pleasures which are pure and spiritual and let my ambition be to come as neer to the Angel as this clog of my flesh will permit LXIII There is great difference in mens dispositions under affliction Some there are dead-hearted patients that grow mopish and stupid with too deep a sence of their sufferings others out of a careless jollity are insensible even of sharp and heavy crosses We are wont to speak of some whose inchanted flesh is invulnerable this is the state of those hearts which are so bewitched with worldly pleasurâ—s that they are not to be peirced with
any calamity that may befal them in their estates children husbands wives friends so as they can say with Solomons drunkard They have stricken me and I was not sick they have beaten me but I felt it not These are dead flesh which do no more feel the knife then if it did not at all enter for whom some corrosives are necessary to make them capable of smart This disposition though it seem to carry a face of Fortitude and Patience yet is justly offensive and not a little injurious both to God and the soul To God whom it indeavors to frustrate of those holy ends which he proposeth to himself in our sufferings for wherefore doth he afflict us if he would not have us afflicted wherefore doth the father whip the childe but that he would have him smart and by smarting bettered he looks for cryes and tears and the childe that weeps not under the rod is held graceless To the soul whom it robs of the benefit of our suffering for what use can there be of patience where there is no sence of evil and how can patience have its perfect work where it is not Betwixt both these extreams if we would have our souls prosper a mid-disposition must be attained we must be so sensible of evils that we be not stupified with them and so reâ—olute under our crosses that we may be truly sensible of them not so brawned under the rod that we should not feel it nor yet so tender that we should over-feel it not more patient under the stripe then willing to kiss the hand that inflicts it LXIV God as he is one so he loves singleness and simplicity in the inward parts as therefore he hath been pleased to give us those sences double whereby we might let in for our selves as our eyes and ears and those limbs double whereby we might act for our selves as our hands and feet so those which he would appropriate to himself as our hearts for beleef and our tongue for confession he hath given us single neither did he ever ordain or can abide two hearts in a bosome two tongues in one mouth It is then the hateful stile which the Spirit of God gives to an hypocrite that he is double-minded In the language of Gods Spirit a fool hath no heart and a dissembler hath an heart and an heart and surely as a man that hath two heads is a monster in nature so he that hath two hearts is no less a spiritual monster to God For the holy and wise God hath made one for one One minde or soul for one body And if the regenerate man have two men in one the old man and the new yet it is so as that one is flesh the other spirit the minde then is not double but the law of the mind is opposed to the law of the flesh so as here are strivings in one heart not the sidings of two for surely the God of unity can neither indure multiplication nor division of hearts in one brest If then we have one heart for God another for Mammon we may be sure God will not own this latter how should he for he made it not Yea most justly will he disclaim both since that which he made was but one this double And as the wise man hath told us That God hates nothing which he hath made so may we truly say God hateth whatsoever he made not since what he made not is onely evil When I have done my best I shall have but a weak and a faulty heart but Lord let it be but a single one Search me O God and know my heart try me and know my thoughts and see if there be any wicked way in me and lead me in the way everlasting LXV There is a kinde of not-being in sin for sin is not an existence of somewhat that is but a deficiency of that rectitude which should be it is a privation but not without a real mischief as blindness is but a privation of sight but a true misery Now a privation cannot stand alone it must have some subject to lean upon there is no blindness but where there is an eye no death but where there hath been a life sin therefore supposes a soul wherein it is and an act whereto it cleaveth and those acts of sin are they which the Apostle calls the works of darkness So as there is a kinde of operosity in sin in regard whereof sinners are stiled The workers of iniquity And surely there are sins wherein there is more toyl and labor then in the holiest actions What pains and care doth the theef take in setting his match in watching for his prey How doth he spend the darkest and coldest nights in the execution of his plot What fears what flights what hazards what shifts are here to avoyd notice and punishment The adulterer says That stoln waters are sweet but that sweet is sauced to him with many careful thoughts with many deadly dangers The superstitious bygot who is himself besotted with error how doth he traverse Sea and land to make a Proselyte What adventures doth he make what perils doth he run what deaths doth he challenge to mar a soul So as some men take more pains to go to Hell then some others do to go to Heaven O the sottishness of sinners that with a temporary misery will needs purchase an eternal How should we think no pains sufficient for the attaining of Heaven when we see wretched men toyl so much for damnation LXVI With what elegance and force doth the holy Ghost express our Saviours leaving of the world which he cals his taking home again or his receiving up In the former implying That the Son of God was for the time sent out of his Fathers house to these lower regions of his exile or pilgrimage and was now re-admitted into those his glorious mansions In the latter so intimating his triumphant ascension that he passeth over his bitter passion Surely he was to take death in his way so he told his Disciples in the walk to Emaus Ought not Christ to suffer these things and to enter into his glory He must be lifted up to the Cross ere his Ascension to Heaven but as if the thought of death were swallowed up in the blessed issue of his death here is no mention of ought but his assumption Lo death truly swallowed up in victory Neither is it otherwise proportionally with us wholly so it cannot be for as for him Death did but taste of him could not devour him much less put him over It could not but yield him whole entire the third day without any impairing of his nature yea with an happy addition to it of a glorious immortality and in that glorified humanity he ascended by his own Power into his Heaven For us we must be content that one part of us lye rotting for the time in the dust whiles our spiritual part shall
by the ministery of Angels be received up to those everlasting habitations Here is an Assumption therefore true and happy though not as yet total And why should I not therefore have my heart taken up with the assured expectation of this receiving up into my glory Why do I not look beyond death at the eternally-blessed condition of this soul of mine which in my dissolution is thus crowned with immortality So doth the Sea-beaten Marriner chear up himself with the sight of that Heaven which he makes for So doth the Travailer comfort himself when after a tempestuous storm he sees the Sun breaking forth in his brightness I am dying but O Saviour thou art the resurrection and the life he that beleeves in thee though he be dead yet shall he live Awake and sing ye that dwel in the dust for thy dew is as the dew of herbs and the earth shall cast out the dead Blessed are the dead that dye in the Lord for they rest from their labors and their works follow them LXVII What need I be troubled that I finde in my self a fear of Death what Israelite is not ready to run away at the sight of this Goliah This fear is natural and so far from being evil that it was incident into the Son of God who was heard in that which he feared Christianity serves not to destroy but to rectifie nature Grace regulates this passion in us and corrects the exorbitances of it never intended to root it out Let me therefore entertain this fear but so as that I may master it if I cannot avoyd fear let it be such as may be incident into a faithful man Whiles my fear apprehends just terror in the face of Death let my faith lay fast hold on that blessed Saviour who hath both overcome and sweetned it on that blessed estate of glory which accompanies it my fear shall end in joy my death in advantage LXVIII It is too plain that we are faln upon the old age of the world the last times and therefore nearest to the dissolution and if time it self did not evince it the disposition and qualities would most evidently do it For to what a cold temper of charity are we grown what meer Ice is in these spiritual veins the unnatural and unkindly flushings of self-love abound indeed every where but for true Christian love it is come to old Davids pass it may be covered with clothes but it can get no heat Besides what whimsies and fancies of dotage do we finde the world possessed withal beyond the examples of all former times what wilde and mad opinions have been lately broached which the setled brains of better ages could never have imagined Unto these how extreamly cholerick the world is grown in these later times there needs no other proof then the effusion of so much blood in this present age as many preceding centuries of years have been sparing to spill What should I speak of the moral distempers of diseases the confluence whereof hath made this age more wickedly-miserable then all the former for when ever was there so much prophaneness atheism blasphemy schism excess disobedience oppression licentiousness as we now sigh under Lastly that which is the common fault of age loquacity is a plain evidence of the worlds declinedness for was there ever age guilty of so much tongue and pen as this last were ever the Presses so cloyed with frivolous work Every man thinks what he lists and speaks what he thinks and writes what he speaks and prints what he writes Neither would the world talk so much did it not make account it cannot talk long What should we do then since we know the world truly old and now going upon his great and fatal Climacterical but as discreet men would carry themselves to impotent and decrepit age bear with the infirmities of it pity and bewail the distempers strive against the enormities and prepare for the dissolution LXIX There cannot be a stronger motive to awe and obedience then that which Saint Peter enforceth That God is both a Father and a Judg The one is a title of Love and Mercy the other of Justice What ever God is he is all that he is all Love and Mercy He is all Justice He is not so a Judg that he hath waved the title and affection of a Father He is not so a Father that he will remit ought of his infinite justice as a Judg He is he will ever be both these in one and we must fasten our eyes upon both these at once and be accordingly affected unto both He is a Father therefore here must be a loving awe He is a Judg and therefore here must be an awful love and obedience So must we lay hold upon the tender mercies of a Father that we may rejoyce continually so must we apprehend the Justice of a righteous Judg that we do lovingly tremble Why then should man despair God is a father All the bowels of mortal and humane love are straight to his Can a woman forget her sucking childe that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb yea they may forget yet will I not forget thee saith the Lord. That which is the title of his personality in divine relation is also the title of his gracious relation to us Father neither can he be other then he is styled And contrarily how dare man presume since this Father is a Judg It is for sinful flesh and blood to be partial foolish parents may be apt to connive at the sins of their own loyns or bowels because theirs either they will not see them or not hate them or not censure them or not punish them The infinite justice of a God cannot wink at our failings There is no debt of our sin but must be paid in our selves or our surety If then we call him Father who without respect of persons judgeth according to every mans work why do we not pass the time of our sojourning here in fear LXX How terrible a motion was that which was made by the two Disciples of commanding fire to come down from Heaven and consume the inhospital Samaritans Me thinks I could tremble but at the imagination of so dreadful a judgment as they did not fear to sue for Yet if we look to the offence it was no positive act of indignity offered to Christ but the meer not lodging of his train and that not out of a rude inhumanity but out of a religious scruple what could they have said if these Samaritans had pursued them with swords and staves and stones Whom shall we hope to finde free from cruelty of revenge when even the Disciple of Love was thus over-taken What wonder is it if natural men be transported with furious desires when so eminent Domesticks and followers of our Saviour were thus faulty Surely nature in man is cruel neither is there any creature under Heaven so bloody to
feels nor sees Whiles the coast is clear every man can be ready to say with Peter Though all men yet not I If I should dye with thee I will not deny thee in any wise But when the evil hour cometh when our enemy appears armed in the lists ready to encounter us then to call up our spirits and to grapple resolutely with dangers and death it is the praise and proof of a true Christian valour And this is that which the Apostle calls standing in opposition to both falling and fleeing Falling out of faintness and fleeing for fear It shall not be possible for us thus to stand if we shall trust to our own feet In and of our selves the best of us are but meer cowards neither can be able so much as to look our enemy in the face Would we be perfect victors we must go out of our selves into the God of our strength If we have made him ours who shall yea who can be against us We can do all things through him that strengthens us All things therefore conquer Death and Hell If we be weakness he is omnipotence Put we on the Lord Jesus Christ by a lively Faith what enemy can come within us to do us hurt What time I am afraid I will trust in thee O God In thee O God have I trusted I will not fear what either flesh or spirit can do unto me The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer my God my strength in whom I will trust my buckler and the horn of my salvation I will call upon the Lord who is worthy to be praised so shall I be saved from mine enemies LXXV It is disparagement enough that the Apostle casts upon all the visible things of this world That the things which are seen are temporary Be they never so glorious yet being transitory they cannot be worthy of our hearts Who would care for an house of glass if never so curiously painted and gilded All things that are measured by time are thus brittle Bodily substances of what kinde soever lye open to the eye and being seen can be in no other then a fading condition even that goodly Fabrick of Heaven which we see and admire must be changed and in a sort dissolved How much more vanishing are all earthly glories and by how much shorter their continuance is so much lower must be their valuation We account him foolish that will dote too much upon a flower though never so beautiful because we know it can be but a moneths pleasure and no care no art can preserve it from withering amongst the rest the Hemerocallis is the least esteemed because one day ends its beauty what madness then were it in us to set our hearts upon these perishing contentments which we must soon mutually leave we them they us Eternity is that onely thing which is worthy to take up the thoughts of a wise man That being added to evil makes the evil infinitely more intolerable and being added to good makes the good infinitely more desireable O Eternity thou bottomless abyss of misery to the wicked thou indeterminable pitch of joy to the Saints of God what soul is able to comprehend thee what strength of understanding is able to conceive of thee Be thou ever in my thoughts ever before mine eyes Be thou the scope of all my actions of all my indeavors and in respect of thee let all this visible world be to mee as nothing And since onely the things which are not seen by the eye of sense are eternal Lord sharpen thou the eyes of my faith that I may see those things invisible and may in that sight enjoy thy blessed eternity LXXVI What is all the world to us in comparison of the Bird in our bosome our conscience In vain shall all the world acquite and magnifie us if that secretly condemn us and if that condemn us not We have confidence towards God and may bid defiance to men and devils Now that it may not condemn us it must be both pacified and purged pacified in respect of the guilt of sin purged in respect of the corruption For so long as there is guilt in the soul the clamors of an accusing and condemning conscience can no more be stilled then the waters of the Sea can stand still in a storm There is then no pacification without removing the guilt of sin no removing of guilt without remission no remission without satisfaction no satisfaction without a price of infinite value answerable to the infiniteness of the Justice offended and this is no where to be had but in the blood of Christ God and Man All created and finite powers are but miserable comforters Physitians of no value to this one And the same power that pacifieth the conscience from the guilt must also purge it from the filthiness of sin even that blood of the Son of God who is made unto us of God Sanctification and Redemption That Faith which brings Christ home to the soul doth by the efficacy of his blessed Spirit purifie the heart from all filthiness both of flesh and spirit Being justified by this faith we have peace with God When once the heart is quieted from the uproars of self-accusation and cleansed from dead works what in this world can so much concern us as to keep it so Which shall be done if we shall give Christ the possession of our souls and commit the keys into his onely hands so shall nothing be suffered to enter in that may disturb or defile it if we shall settle firm resolutions in our brests never to yield to the commission of any known enormious sin Failings and slips there will be in the holiest of Gods Saints whiles they carry their clay about them For these we are allowed to fetch forth a pardon of course from that infinite mercy of our God who hath set a Fountain open to the house of David and to the inhabitants of Jerusalem for sin and for uncleanness by the force of our daily prayers But if through an over-bold security and spiritual negligence we shall suffer our selves to be drawn away into some heinous wickedness it must cost warm water to recover us Neither can it in such a case be safe for us to suffer our eyes to sleep or our eye-lids to slumber till we have made our peace with Heaven This done and carefully maintained what can make us other then happily secure Blessed is he whose conscience hath not condemned him and who is not faln from his hope in the Lord. LXXVII We cannot apprehend Heaven in any notion but of excellency and glory that as it is in it self a place of wonderful resplendance and Majesty so it is the Palace of the most high God wherein he exhibites his infinite magnificence that it is the happy receptacle of all the elect of God that it is the glorious rendezvous of the blessed
Angels that we have parents children husband wife brothers sisters friends whom we dearly loved there For such is the power of love that it can endeare any place to us where the party affected is much more the best If it be a loathsome gaol our affection can make it a delightful bower yea the very grave cannot keep us off The women could say of Mary that she was gone to the grave of Lazarus to weep there and the zeal of those holy clyents of Christ carries them to seek their as they supposed still dead Saviour even in his Tomb Above all conceivable apprehensions then wherein Heaven is endeared to us there is none comparable to that which the Apostle enforceth to us that there Christ sitteth on the right hand of God If we have an husband wife childe whom we dearly love pent up in some Tower or Castle afar off whither we are not allowed to have access how many longing eyes do we cast thither how do we please our selves to think within those walls is he inclosed whom my soul loveth and who is inclosed in my heart but if it may be possible to have passage though with some difficulty and danger to the place how gladly do we put our selves upon the adventure When therefore we hear and certainly know that our most dear Saviour is above in all heavenly glory and that the Heavens must contain him till his coming again with what full contentment of heart should we look up thither How should we break thorow all these secular distractions and be carried up by our affections which are the wings of the soul towards an happy fruition of him Good old Jacob when he heard that his dearling son was yet alive in Egypt how doth he gather up his spirits and takes up a cheerful resolution Joseph my son is yet alive I will go and see him before I dye Do we think his heart was any more in Canaan after he heard where his Joseph was And shall we when we hear and know where our dearest Saviour typified by that good Patriark is that he is gone before to provide a place for us in the rich Goshen above shall we be heartless in our desires towards him and take up with earth How many poor souls take tedious costly perilous voyages to that land which onely the bodily presence of our Saviour could denominate holy their own wickedness justly stiles accursed onely to see the place where our dear Saviour trod where he stood where he sate lay set his last footing and finde a kinde of contentment in this sacred curiosity returning yet never the holier never the happier how then should I be affected with the sight of that place where he is now in person sitting gloriously at the right hand of Majesty adored by all the powers of Heaven Let it be a covenant between me and my eyes never to look up at Heaven as how can I look beside it but I shall in the same instant think of my blessed Saviour sitting there in his glorified humanity united to the incomprehensible glorious Deity attended and worshiped by thousand thousands of Saints and Angels preparing a place for me and all his elect in those eternal Mansions LXXVIII How lively doth the Spirit of God describe the heavenly affections of faithful Abraham that he looked for a city which hath foundations whose builder and maker is God What city was this but the celestial Jerusalem the glorious seat of the Great Empire of Heaven The main strength of any building is in the foundation if that be firm and sure the fabrick well knit together will stand but if that be either not laid or lye loose and unsetled the tottering frame doth but wait upon the next wind for a ruine The good Patriark had been used to dwell in Tents which were not capable of a foundation It is like he and his ancestors wanted not good houses in Chaldea where they were formerly planted God calls him forth of those fixed habitations in his own Countrey to sojourn in Tabernacles or Booths in a strange land his faith carries him cheerfully along his present fruition gives way to hope of better things In stead of those poor sheds of sticks and skins he looks for a City in stead of those stakes and cords he looks for Foundations in stead of mens work he looks for the Architecture of God Alass we men will be building Castles and Towers here upon earth or in the ayr rather such as either have no foundation at all or at the best onely a foundation in the dust neither can they be any other whiles they are of mans making for what can he make in better condition then himself The City that is of Gods building is deep and firmly grounded upon the rock of his eternal decree and hath more foundations then one and all of them both sure and costly Gods material house built by Solomon had the foundation laid with great squared stone but the foundations of the wall of this City of God are garnished with all manner of precious stones Glorious things are spoken of thee O thou city of God Why do I set up my rest in this house of clay which is every day falling on my head whiles I have the assured expectation of so glorious a dwelling above For we know that if our earthly house of this tabernacle were dissolved we have a building of God an house not made with hands eternal in the Heavens LXXIX God though he be free of his entertainments yet is curious of his guests we know what the great house-keeper said to the sordid guest Friend how camest thou in hither not having on a wedding garment To his feast of glory none can come but the pure without this disposition no man shall so much as see God much less be entertained by him To his feast of grace none may come but the clean and those who upon strict examination have found themselves worthy That we may be meet to sit at either of these Tables there must be a putting off ere there can be a putting on a putting off the old garments ere there can be a putting on the new the old are foul and ragged the new clean and holy for if they should be worn at once the foul and beastly under-garment would soyl and defile the clean the clean could not cleanse the foul As it was in the Jewish law of holiness holy flesh in the skirt of the garment could not infuse an holiness into the garment but the touch of an unclean person might diffuse uncleanness to the garment Thus our professed holiness and pretended graces are sure to be defiled by our secretly-maintained corruption not our corruption sanctified by our graces as in common experience if the sound person come to see the infected the infected may easily taint the sound the sound cannot by his presence heal the infected If ever therefore we look to
Faith perswades me to the latter telling me that To dye is gain Now whether of these two shall prevail with me Certainly as each of them hath a share in me so shall either of them act its own part in my soul Nature shall obtain so much of me as to fetch from me upon the suddain apprehension of death some thoughts of fear Faith shall strait step in and drive away all those weak fears and raise up my heart to a cheerful expectation of so gainful and happy a change Nature shews me the gastliness of death Faith shews me the transcendency of Heavenly glory Nature represents to me a rotten carkase Faith presents me with a glorious soul Shortly nature startles at the sight of death Faith out-faces and overcomes it so then I who at the first blush could say O Death how bitter is thy remembrance can now upon my deliberate thoughts say I desire to depart and to be with Christ LXXXIIII In the carriage of our holy profession God can neither abide us cowardly nor indiscreet The same mouth that bad us when we are persecuted in one city flee into another said also he that will save his life shall loose it we may neither cloak cowardice with a pretended discretion nor lose our discretion in a rash courage He that is most skilful and most valiant may in his combat traverse his ground for an advantage and the stoutest Commander may fall flat to avoyd a Cannon-shot True Christian wisdom and not carnal fear is that wherewith we must consult for advice when to stand to it and when to give back On the one side he dies honorably that falls in Gods quarrel on the other he that flies may fight again Even our blessed leader that came purposely to give his life for the world yet when he found that he was laid for in Judea flees into Galilce The practise of some Primitive Christians that in an ambition of martyrdom went to seek out and chalenge dangers and death is more worthy of our wonder and applause then our imitation It shall be my resolution to be warily thrifty in managing my life when God offers me no just cause of hazard and to be willingly profuse of my blood when it is called for by that Saviour who was not sparing of shedding his most precious blood for me LXXXV He had need to be well under-laid that knows how to entertain the time and himself with his own thoughts Company variety of imployments or recreations may wear out the day with the emptiest hearts but when a man hath no society but of himself no task to set himself upon but what arises from his own bosome surely if he have not a good stock of former notions or an inward mint of new he shall soon run out of all and as some forlorn bankrupt grow weary of himself Hereupon it is that men of barren and unexercised hearts can no more live without company then fish out of the water And those Heremites and other Votaries which professing onely devotion have no mental abilities to set themselves on work are fain to tire themselves and their unwelcome hours with the perpetual repetitions of the same orisons which are now grown to a tedious and heartless formality Those contemplative spirits that are furnished with gracious abilities and got into acquaintance with the God of Heaven may and can lead a life even in the closest restraint or wildest solitariness neerest to Angelical but those which neither can have Maries heart nor will have Marthaes hand must needs be unprofitable to others and wearisome to themselves LXXXVI There is nothing more easie then to be a Christian at large but the beginnings of a strict and serious Christianity are not without much difficulty for nature affects a loose kinde of liberty which it cannot indure to have restrained neither fares it otherwise with it then with some wilde colt which at the first taking up flings and plunges and will stand on no ground but after it hath been somwhile disciplin'd at the Post is grown tractable and quietly submits either to the saddle or the collar The first is the worst afterwards that which was tolerable will prove easie and that which was easie will be found pleasant For in true practical Christianity there is a more kindly and better liberty Standfast saith the Apostle in that liberty wherewith Christ hath made you free Lo here a liberty of Christs making and therefore both just and excellent for what other is this liberty then a freedome as from the tyranny of the law so from the bondage of sin Being then made free from sin saith Saint Paul ye became the servants of righteousness Here are two masters under one of which every soul must serve either sin or righteousness if we be free from the one we are bond-men to the other we say truly the service of God that is of righteousness is perfect freedom but to be free to sin is a perfect bondage and to serve sin is no other then a vassallage to the devil From this bondage Christ onely can free us If the Son shall make you free yee shall be free indeed and we are no Christians unless we be thus freed and being thus freed we shall rejoyce in the pleasant fetters of our voluntary and cheereful obedience to righteousness neither would we for a world return to those gieves and manacles of sin which we once beld our most dear and comely ornaments and can truly say Thou hast set my feet in a large room I will walk at liberty for I seek thy precepts LXXXVII I cannot but pity and lament the condition of those Christians who for the hope of a little earthly dross do willingly put themselves for a continuance out of the pale of Gods Church What do they else but cast themselves quite out of the Almighties protection who hath not bound himself to follow them out of his own walks or to seek them out amongst Turks and Infidels well may he say to them as to the chief Pastor of Pergamus I know thy works and where thou dwellest even where Satans seat is but have they any reason to expect that he should dwell with them there under the raign of that Prince of darkness These men put upon themselves that hard measure which the man after Gods own heart complains to be put upon him by his worst enemies Wo is me that I am constrained to dwell with Meshech and to have my habitation in the Tents of Kedar That holy man could in the bitterness of his soul inveigh against his persecutors for no other terms then these men offer to themselves Cursed be they before the Lord for they have driven me out this day from abiding in the inheritance of the Lord saying go serve other gods I speak not of those who carry God along with them in his ordinance all earths are alike to us where we may
with me Dispose of me as thou wilt Only make me faithfull in all thy services resolute to trust my self with thee in all events carefull to be approved of thee in all my waies and crown my decayed age with such fruits as may be pleasing to thee and available to the good of many Lastly let me live to thee and die in thee IX How oft Lord have I wondred to see the strange carriage of thine administration of these earthly affaires and therein to see thy marvailous wisdome power goodness in fetching good out of evill Alas we wretched men are apt enough to fetch the worst of evils out of the greatest good turning the grace of thee our God into wantonnesse but how have I seen thee of liveless stones to raise up children to Abraham of sinners to make Saints out of a desperate confusion to fetch order out of a bloudy war an happy peace out of resolutions of revenge love out of the rock water out of a persecuter an Apostle How can I be discouraged with unlikelihoods when I see thee work by contraries It is not for me O my God to examine or pre-judge thy counsailes take what waies thou wilt so thou bring me to thine own end all paths shall be direct that shall leade me to blessedness X. How many good purposes O my God have I taken up let fall to the ground again without effect how teeming hath this barren womb of my heart been of false conceptions but especially when thy hand hath been smart and heavy upon me in mine affliction how have I tasked my self with duties and revived my firme resolutions of more strict obedience which yet upon the continuance of my better condition I have slackened Lord it is from thee that I purposed well it is from my own sinfull weakness that I failed in my performances If any good come me the will and the deed must be both thine The very preparations of the heart are from thee and if I have devised my way it must be thou that directest my steps O God do thou ripen and perfect all the good motions that thou puttest into my soul and make my health but such as my sickness promised XI Every man Lord is unwilling that his name should dye we are all naturally ambitious of being thought on when we are gone those that have not living monuments to perpetuate them affect to have dead if Absolon have not a son he will yet erect a pillar yet when we have all done time eates us out at the last There is no remembrance of the wise more then of the foole for ever seeing that which now is in the daies to come shall all be forgotten O God let it be my care and ambition what ever become of my memory here below that my name may be recorded in Heaven XII Thy wise providence O God hath so ordered it that every mans minde seeks and findes contentment in some thing otherwise it could not be since we must meet with so frequent crosses in the world but that mans life would be burdensome to him one takes pleasure in his hauke or hound another in his horses and furnitures one in fair buildings another in pleasant walks and beautiful gardens one in travailing abroad another in the enioying of the profits and pleasures of his home one in the increase of his wealth another in the titles of his honor one in a comfortable wife another in loving and dutiful children but when all is done if there be not somwhat els to uphold the heart in the evil day it must sink O God do thou possesse my soul of thee let me place all my felicity in the fruition of thine infinite goodness so I am sure the worst of the world hath not power to render me other then happy XIII O Lord God under how opposite aspects do I stand from the world how variously am I construed by men One pities my condition another praises my patience One favors mee out of the opinion of some good that he thinks he sees in mee another dislikes me for some imagined evil What are the eyes or tongues of men to mee Let me not know what they say or think of me and what am I the better or worse for them they can have no influence upon me without my own apprehension All is in what termes I stand with thee my God if thou be pleased to look upon me with the eye of thy tender mercy and compassion What care I to be unjustly brow-beaten of the world If I may be blessed with thy favour let me be made a gazing-stock to the world to Angels and to men XIV Speak Lord for thy servant heareth What is it which thou wouldst have me do that I may finde rest to my soul I am willing to exercise my self in all the acts of piety which thou requirest I am ready to fast to pray to read to hear to meditate to communicate to give alms to exhort admonish reprove comfort where thou bid'st me and if there be any other duty appertaining to devotion or mercy let me serve thee in it But alas O my God howsoever I know these works are in themselves well-pleasing unto thee yet as they fall from my wretchedness they are stained with so many imperfections that I have more reason to crave pardon for them then to put confidence in them and if I could performe them never so exquisitely yet one sin is more then enough to dash all my obedience I see then O Lord I well see there is no act that I can be capable to do unto thee wherein I can finde any repose it must be thine act to me which only can effect it It is thy gracious word Come unto me all ye that labour and are heavy laden and I will give you rest Lo this rest must be thy gift not my earning and what can be freer then gift Thou givest it then but to those that come to thee not to those that come not To those that come to thee laden and labouring under the sense of their own wretchedness not to the proud and careless O Saviour thy sinner is sufficiently laden with the burden of his iniquities lade thou me yet more with true penitent sorrow for my sins and inable me then to come unto thee by a lively faith Take thou the praise of thine own work Give me the grace to come and give me rest in coming XV. O blessed Saviour What strange variety of conceits do I finde concerning thy thousand years raign What riddles are in that prophesie which no humane tongue can aread where to fix the begining of that marvailous millenary and where the end and what manner of raign it shall be whether temporal or spiritual on earth or in heaven undergoes as many constructions as there are pens that have undertaken it and yet when all is done I see thine Apostle speaks onely of the souls of thy martyrs raigning
but sometimes I am foyled and go halting out of the field it is thy mercy that I live being so fiercely assaulted by those principalities and powers it were more then wonder if I should escape such hands without a wound Even that holy servant of thine who strove with thine Angel for a blessing went limping away though he prevailed what mervail is it that so weak a wretch as I striving with many evill Angels for the avoidance of a curse come off with a maime or a scar But blessed be thy name the wounds that I receive are not mortall and when I fall it is but to my knees whence I rise with new courage and hopes of victory Thou who art the God of all power and keepest the keys of hell and death hast said Resist the Devill and he will flee from you Lord I do and will by thy merciful ayd still and ever resist make thou my faith as stedfast as my will is resolute Oh still teach thou my hands to war and my fingers to fight arme thou my soul with strength and at last according to thy gracious promise crown it with victory XXIII Oh Lord God how ambitious how covetous of knowledg is this soul of mine as the eye is not satisfied with seeing nor the eare filled with hearing no more is the mind of man with understanding yea so insatiable is my heart that the more I know the more I desire to know and the less I think I know Under heaven there can be no bounds set to this intellectuall appetite O do thou stop the mouth of my soul with thy self who art infinite Whom have I in heaven but thee and there is none upon earth that I desire besides thee Alas Lord if I could know all creatures with all their forms qualities workings if I could know as much as innocent Adam or wise Solomon Yea more if I could know all that is done in earth or heaven what were my soul the better if it have not attained the knowledg of thee Since as the Preacher hath most wisely observed In much wisdome is much grief and he that increaseth knowledg increaseth sorrow Oh then set off my heart from affecting that knowledg whose end is sorrow and fix it upon that knowledg which brings eeverlasting life And this is life eternal to know thee the only true God and Jesus Christ whom thou hast sent XXIV O my God what miserable uncertainties there are in these worldly hopes But yesterday I made account of an eminent advantage of my estate which now ends in a deep loss How did we lately feed our selves with the hope of a firme and during peace which now shuts up in too much bloud How confidently did I relie upon the promised favour of some great friends which now leave me in the suds as the scorn of a mis-called fortune In how slippery places O Lord do our feet stand If that may be said to stand which is ever sliding never fixed And not more slippery then brittle so as there is not more danger of falling then of sinking With thee O God with thee only is a constant immutability of happiness There let me seek it there let me finde it and over-looking all the fickle objects of this vain world let my soul pitch it self upon that blessed immortality which ere long it hopes to enjoy with thee XXV Lord God What a wearisome circle do I walk in here below I sleep and dress and work and eat and work again and eat again and undress and sleep again and thus wearing out my time finde a satiety in all these troublesome Lord when shall I come to that state wherein I shall do nothing but injoy thee do nothing but praise thee and in that one work shall finde such infinite contentment that my glorified soul cannot wish to do any other and shall therein alone bestow a blessed eternity XXVI O God how troublesome and painful do I find this Sun of thine whose scorching beams beat upon my head and yet this excellent creature of thine is that to which under thee we are beholden for our very life and it is thy great blessing to the earth that it may enjoy these strong and forceable rayes from it Oh Who shall be able to endure the burning flames of thy wrath which thou intendest for the punishment and everlasting torment of thine enemies And if men shall blaspheme the name of thee the God of heaven for the great heat of that beneficiall creature what shall we think they will do for that fire which shall be consuming them to all eternity Lord keep my soul from those flames which shall be ever burning and never either quenched or abated XXVII Which way O Lord which way can I look and not see some sad examples of misery One wants his limbs with Mephibosheth another his sight with Bartimeus a third with Lazarus wants bread and a whole skin One is pained in his body another plundred of his estate a third troubled in minde one is pined in prison another tortured on the rack a third languisheth under the loss of a deare son or wife or husband Who am I Lord that for the present I enjoy an immunity from all these sorrows I am sure none grones under them that hath deserved them more It is thy mercy thy meer mercy O my good God that any of these calamities have faln beside me Oh make me truly thankful for thine infinite goodness and yet onely so sensible of thy gracious indulgence this way as that when any of these evils shall seize upon mee I may be no more dejected in the sense of them then I am now over-joyed with the favor of their forbearance XXVIII O blessed God what variety of gifts hast thou scattered amongst the sons of men To one thou hast given vigor of body to another agility beauty to a third to one depth of judgment to another quickness of apprehension to one readiness and rarity of invention to another tenacity of memorie to one the knowledg of liberal arts to another the exquisiteness of manuary skill to one worldly wealth to another honour to one a wise heart to another an eloquent tongue to one more then enough to another contentment with a little to one valour to another sagacity These favors O Lord thou hast promiscuously dispersed amongst both thy friends and enemies but oh how transcendent are those spiritual mercies which thou hast reserved for thine own the graces of heavenly wisdome lively faith fervent charity firme hope joy in the holy Ghost and all the rest of that divine beauye For any competency of the least of thy common blessings I desire to be thankful to thy bounty for which of them O God can I either merit or requite but oh for a soul truly and eagarly ambitious of those thy best mercies Oh let me ever long for them and ever be insatiable of them Oh do thou fill my heart
with the desire of them and let that desire never finde it self filled XXIX How comfortable a style is that O God which thine Apostle gives to thine Heaven whiles he cals it the inheritance of the Saints in light None can come there but Saints the roomes of this lower world are taken up commonly with wicked men with beasts with Devils but into that heavenly Jerusalem no unholy thing can enter Neither can any Saint be excluded thence each of them have not only a share but an entire right to thy glory And how many just titles are there O Saviour to that region of blessedness It is thy Fathers gift it is thy purchase it is thy Saints inheritance theirs only in thy right by thy gracious adoption they are sons and as sons heires co-heirs with thee of that blessed Patrimony so feoffed upon them so possessed of them that they can never be disseized And Lord how glorious an inheritance it is An inheritance in light In light incomprehensible in light inaccessible Lo the most spirituall of all thy visible creatures is light and yet this light is but the effect and emanation of one of thy creatures the Sun and serves only for the illumination of this visible world but that supernal light is from the Al-glorious beams of thy Divine Majesty diffusing themselves to those blessed spirits both Angels and Souls of thy Saints who live in the joyful fruition of thee to all eternity Alas Lord we do here dwell in darkness and under an uncomfortable opacity whiles thy face is clouded from us with manifold temptations there above with thee is pure light a constant noon-tide of glory I am here under a miserable and obscure wardship Oh teach me to despise the best of earth and ravish my soul with a longing desire of being possessed of that blessed inheritance of the Saints in light XXX What outward blessing can be sweeter then civill peace What judgment more heavy then that of the sword Yet O Saviour there is a peace which thou disclaimest and there is a sword which thou challengest to bring Peace with our corruptions is warr against thee and that war in our bosomes wherein the spirit fighteth against the flesh is peace with thee O let thy good Spirit raise and foment this holy and intestine war more and more within me And as for my outward spirituall enemies how can there be a victory without war and how can I hope for a crown without victory O do thou ever gird me with strength to the battle inable thou me to resist unto bloud make me faithfull to the death that thou maist give me the crown of life XXXI O Lord God how subject is this wretched heart of mine to repining and discontentment If it may not have what it would how ready it is like a froward child to throw away what it hath I know and feel this to be out of that naturall pride which is so deep rooted in me for could I be sensible enough of my own unworthinesse I should think every thing too good every thing too much for me my very being O Lord is more then I am ever able to answer thee and how could I deserve it when I was not but that I have any helps of my wel-beeing here or hopes and means of my being glorious hereafter how far is it beyond the reach of my soul Lord let me finde my own nothingness so shall I be thankfull for a little and in my very want blesse thee XXXII Where art thou O my God whither hast thou withdrawn thy self it is not long since I found thy comfortable presence with my soul now I misse thee and mourn and languish for thee Nay rather where art thou O my soul my God is where he was neither can be any other then himself the change is in thee whose inconstant disposition varies continually and cannot finde it self fixed upon so blessed an object It will never be better with me O my God until it shall please thee to stablish my heart with thy free Spirit and to keep it close to thee that it may not be carried away with vain distractions with sinful temptations Lord my God as thou art alwaies present with me and canst no more be absent then not be thy self so let me be alwaies with thee in an humble and faithful acknowledgment of thy presence as I can never be out of thine all-seeing eye so let mine eyes be ever bent upon thee who art invisible Thou that hast given me eyes improve them to thy glorie and my happiness XXXIII My bosome O Lord is a Rebeccaes womb there are twins striving within it a Jacob and Esau the old man and the new whiles I was in the barren state of my unregeneration all was quiet within me now this strife is both troublesome and paineful so as nature is ready to say If it be so why am I thus But withal O my God I bless thee for this happy unquietness for I know there is just cause of comfort in these inward struglings my soul is now not unfruitful and is conceived with an holy seed which wrestles with my natural corruptions and if my Esau have got the start in the priority of time yet my Jacob shall follow him hard at the heele and happily supplant him And though I must nourish them both as mine yet I can through thy grace imitate thy choice and say with thee Jacob have I loved and Esau have I hated Blessed God make thou that word of thine good in me That the elder shall serve the younger XXXIV Alas my Lord God how small matters trouble me every petty occurrence is ready to rob me of my peace so as me thinks I am like some little cock-boat in a rough Sea which every billow topples up and down and threats to sink I can chide this weak pusillanimity in my self but it is thou that must redress it Lord work my heart to so firme a setledness upon thee that it may never be shaken no not with the violent gusts of temptation much lesse with the easie gales of secular mis-accidents Even when I am hardest pressed in the multitude of the sorrows of my heart let thy comforts refresh my soul but for these sleight crosses oh teach me to despise them as not worthy of my notice much less of my vexation Let my heart be taken up with thee and then what care I whether the world smile or frown XXXV What a comfort it is O Saviour that thou art the first fruits of them that sleep Those that die in thee do but sleep Thou saidst so once of thy Lazarus and maist say so of him again he doth but sleep still His first sleep was but short this latter though longer is no less true out of which he shall no less surely awake at thy second call then he did before at thy first His first sleep and waking was singular this latter is the same with ours
knock'st for entrance wilt be pleased to inable me with strength to turn the key and to unbolt this unweldy bar of my soul O do thou make way for thy self by the strong motions of thy blessed Spirit into the in-most rooms of my heart and do thou powerfully incline me to mine own happiness els thou shalt be ever excluded and I shall be ever miserable XLI In what pangs couldst thou be O Asaph that so woful a word should fall from thee Hath God forgotten to be gracious Surely the temptation went so high that the next step had been blasphemie Had not that good God whom thy bold weakness questions for forgetfulness in great mercy remembred thee and brought thee speedily to remember thy self and him that which thou confessest to have been infirmity had proved a sinful despair I dare say for thee that word washed thy cheeks with many a tear and was worthy of more For O God What can be so dear to thee as the glory of thy mercy There is none of thy blessed attributes which thou desirest to set forth so much unto the sons of men and so much abhorrest to be disparaged by our detraction as thy mercy Thou canst O Lord forget thy displeasure against thy people thou canst forget our iniquities and cast our sins out of thy remembrance but thou canst no more forget to be gracious then thou canst cease to be thy self O my God I sin against thy justice hourly and thy mercy interposes for my remission but oh keep me from sinning against thy mercy What plea can I hope for when I have made my Advocate mine enemy XLI How happy O Lord is the man that hath thee for his God He can want nothing that is good he can be hurt by nothing that is evill his sins are pardoned his good indeavors are accepted his crosses are sanctified his prayers are heard all that he hath are blessings all that he suffers are advantages his life is holy his death comfortable his estate after death glorious Oh that I could feel thee to be my God that I could enjoy an heavenly communion with thee In vain should earth or hell labour to make me other then blessed XLII How just a motion is this of thine O thou sweet singer of Israel O love the Lord all ye his Saints Surely they can be no Saints that love not such a Lord Had he never been good to them yet that infinite goodness which is in himself would have commanded love from Saints Yet how could they have been Saints if he had wholly kept his goodness to himself In that then he hath made them Saints he hath communicated his goodness to them and challengeth all love from them and being made such how infinitely hath he obliged them with all kinds of mercies How can ye choose O ye Saints but love the Lord What have ye what are ye what can ye be but from his meer bounty They are sleight favours that he hath done you for the world in these his very enemies share with you How transcendent are his spirituall obligations Hath he not given you his Angels for your attendants himself for your Protector his Son out of his bosome for your Redeemer his Spirit for your Comforter his heaven for your inheritance If gifts can attract love O my God Who can have any interest in my heart but thy blessed self that hast been so infinitely munificent to my soul Take it to thee thou that hast made and bought it enamour it thoroughly of thy goodness make me sick of love yea let me die for love of thee who hast loved me unto death that I may fully enjoy the perfection of thy love in the height of thy glory XLIII Lord how have I seen men miscarried into those sins the premonition whereof they would have thought incredible and their yeildance thereto impossible How many Hazaels hath our very age yeilded that if a Prophet should have fore told their acts would have said Is thy servant a dog that he should do these great things Oh my God why do not I suspect my self What hold have I of my self more then these other miserable examples of humane frailtie Lord God if thou take off thy hand from me what wickedness shall escape me I know I cannot want a tempter and that tempter cannot want either power or malice or skill or vigilance or baits or opportunities and for my self I find too well that of my self I have no strength to resist any of his temptations O for thy mercies sake uphold thou me with thy mighty hand stand close to me in all assaults shew thy self strong in my weakness Keep back thy servant from presumptuous sins Let them not have dominion over me then onely shall I be upright and shall be innocent from the great transgression XLIV It is thy title O Lord and only thine that thou givest songs in the night The night is a sad and dolorous season as the light contrarily is the image of cheerfulness like as it is in bodily pains and aches that they are still worst towards night so it is in the cares and griefs of mind then they assault us most when they are helpt on by the advantage of an uncomfortable darkness Many men can give themselves songs in the day of their prosperity who can but howl in the night of their affliction but for a Paul and Silas to sing in their prison at mid-night for an Asaph to call to remembrance his song in the night this comes onely from that Spirit of thine whose peculiar style is the Comforter And surely as musick sounds best in the night so those heavenly notes of praise which we sing to thee our God in the gloomy darkness of our adversity cannot but be most pleasing in thine ears Thine Apostle bids us which is our ordinary wont when we are merry to sing when afflicted to pray but if when we are afflicted we can sing as also when we are merriest we can pray that ditty must needs be so much more acceptable to thee as it is a more powerful effect of the joy of thy Holy Ghost O my God I am conscious of my own infirmity I know I am naturally subject to a dull and heavy dumpishness under whatsoever affliction Thou that art the God of all comfort remedy this heartless disposition in me pull this lead out of my bosome make me not patient only but cheerful under my trials fill thou my heart with joy and my mouth with songs in the night of my tribulation XLV It is a true word O Lord that thy Seer said of thee long ago The Lord seeth not as man seeth Man sees the face thou seest the heart man sees things as they seem thou seest them as they are many things are hid from the eyes of men all things lie open and displaid before thee What a madness then were it in me to come disguised into
freely enjoy his presence but of those straglers who care not to live without God so they may be befriended by Mammon How ill a match these poor men make for themselves I send them to their Saviour to learn What is a man profited if he shall gain the whole world and lose his own soul or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul God forbid I should give their souls for lost but I must say they are hazarded for herein doubtless they tempt God who hath not promised to keep them in any other then their just wayes and they do in a sort tempt and challenge Satan to draw them on either to a love of error and impiety or at least to a cooling of their care and love of truth How unlike are these men to that wise merchant in the Gospel He sold all that he had to buy the pearl of great price they sell the pearl to buy a little worthless merchandize As the greatest part of their trafick stands upon exchange so I heartily wish they would make this one exchange more of less care of their wealth for more care of their souls LXXXVIII Even when Joseph was a great lord in Egypt second to none but Pharaoh and had the command of that richest countrey of the world yet then his old Father Jacob thought his poor parcel of Shechem worthy to be bequeathed to him and embraced of him as a noble patrimony because it was in the promised land and the legacy of a dying Father How justly do I admire the faith both of the father and son in this donation Jacob was now in Goshen Shechem was in Canaan neither was the father now in the present possession nor were the sons in some ages to enjoy it It was four hundred and thirty years that Israel must be a sojourner in a strange countrey ere they shall enter into the promised Land yet now as foreseeing the future possession which his posterity should take of this spot of earth so long after Jacob gives Shechem to Joseph and Joseph apprehends it as a rich blessing as the double portion of the divided primogeniture Infidelity is purblinde and can see nothing but that which is hard at hand Faith is quick-sighted and discerns the events of many centuries of years yea of ages to come Abraham saw his Saviours day and rejoyced to see it a thousand nine hundred and fourty years off and Adam before him almost four thousand years As to God all things are present even future so to those that by a lively faith partake of him Why do I not by that faith see my Saviour returning in his Heavenly magnificence as truly as now I see the Heaven whence he shall come and my body as verily raised from the dust and become glorious as now I see it weak and decrepit and falling into the dust LXXXIX True knowledg causeth appetite and desire For the will follows the understanding whatsoever that apprehends to be good for us the affective part inclines to it No man can have any regard to an unknown good If an hungry man did not know that food would refresh and nourish him or the thirsty that drink would satisfie him or the naked that fire would warm him or the sick that Physick would recover him none of these would affect these succors And according to our apprehension of the goodness and use of these helps so is our appetite towards them For the object of the will is a known good either true or appearing so And if our experience can tell us of some that can say with her in the Poet I see and approve better things but follow the worse It is not for that evil as evil much less as worse can fall into the will but that their appetite over-carries them to a misconceit of a particular good so as howsoever in a generality they do confusedly assent to the goodness of some holy act or object yet upon the present occasion here and now as the School speaketh their sensitive appetite hath prevailed to draw them to a perswasion that this pleasure or that profit is worthy to be imbraced Like as our first parents had a general apprehension that it was good to obey all the commands of their Creator but when it came to the forbidden fruit now their eye and their ear and their heart tell them it is good for them both for pleasure and for the gain of knowledg to taste of that forbidden tree So then the miscarriage is not in that they affect that which they think not to be good but in that they think that to be good which is not for alass for one true good there are many seeming which delude the soul with a fair semblance As a man in a generality esteems silver above brass but when he meets with a rusty piece of silver and a cleer piece of brass he chooses rather the clear brass then the silver defaced with rust Surely it is our ignorance that is guilty of our cool neglect of our spiritual good if we did know how sweet the Lord is in his sure promises in his unfailing mercies we could not but long after him and remain unsatisfied till we finde him ours would God be pleased to shine in our hearts by the light of the true knowledg of himself we could not have cause to complain of want of heat in our affections towards his infinite goodness Did we but know how sweet and delectable Christ the Heavenly Manna is we could not but hunger after him and we could not hunger and not be satisfied and in being satisfied blessed XC Those which we mis-cal goods are but in their nature indifferent and are either good or evil as they are affected as they are used Indeed all their malignity or vertue is in the minde in the hand of the possessor Riches ill got ill kept ill spent are but the Mammon of iniquity but if well The Crown of the wise is their riches How can it be amiss to have much when he that was the richest man of the East was the holiest Yea when God himself is justly stiled the possessor of Heaven and Earth How can it be amiss to have little when our Saviour sayes Blessed are ye poor And if from that divine mouth we hear a wo to the rich himself interprets it of them that trust in riches If our riches possess us in stead of our possessing them we have changed our God and lost our selves but if we have learnt to use our wealth and not enjoy it we may be no less gracious then rich If a rich man have a large and humble heart and a just hand he inherits the blessing of the poor If a poor man have a proud heart and a theevish hand he carryes away the wo from the rich Riches saith wise Solomon make themselves wings they fly away as an Eagle towards Heaven So as we may use
the matter our souls may fly thitherward with them If we do good and be rich in good works ready to distribute willing to communicate laying up in store for our selves a good foundation against the time to come that we may lay hold on eternal life Let me say with Agur Give me neither poverty nor riches but whethersoever God gives I am both thankful and indifferent so as whiles I am rich in estate I may be poor in spirit and whiles I am poor in estate I may be rich in grace XCI Had I been in the streets of Jericho sure me thinks I should have justled with Zacheus for the Sycomore to see Jesus and should have blessed my eyes for so happy a prospect and yet I consider that many a one saw his face on earth which shall never see his glory in Heaven and I hear the Apostle say Though we have known Christ after the flesh yet now henceforth know we him so no more O for the eyes of a Stephen that saw the Heavens opened and the glory of God and Jesus standing on the right hand of God! That prospect did as much transcend this of Zacheus as Heaven is above Earth celestial glory above humane infirmity And why should not the eyes of my faith behold the same object which was seen by Stephens bodily eyes I see thee O Saviour I see thee as certainly though not so clearly Do thou sharpen and fortifie these weak eyes of mine that in thy light I may see light XCII How gracious a word was that which God said to Israel I have called thee by thy name and thou art mine He that imposed that name upon Jacob makes familiar use of it to his posterity Neither is the case singular but universally common to all his spiritual issue There is not one of them whom he doth not both call by his name and challenge for his own He that tells the number of the stars and calls them all by their names hath also a name for every of these earthly luminaries He who brought all other living creatures unto man to see how he would call them and would make use of Adams appellation reserved the naming of man to himself neither is there any one of his innumerous posterity whom he knowes not by name But it is one thing to take notice of their names another thing to call them by their names that denotes his omniscience this his specialty of favor none are thus graced but the true Sons of Israel As Gods children do not content themselves with a confused knowledg of a Deity but rest not till they have attained a distinct apprehension of their God as he hath revealed himself to man so doth God again to them It is not enough that he knows them in a general view as in the throng wherein we see many faces none distinctly but he singles them out in a familiar kinde of severalty both of knowledg and respect As then he hath names for the several Stars of Heaven Cimah Cesil Mazzaroth c. And for the several Angels Gabriel Raphael Michael c. and calls them by the proper names which he hath given them so he doth to every of his faithful ones Of one he saith Thou shalt call his name John Of another Thou art Simon thou shalt be called Cephas To one he says Zacheus come down to another Cornelius thy prayers and thine alms are come up In short there is no one of his whom he doth not both know and call by his name What a comfort is this to a poor wretched man to think Here I walk obscure and contemptible upon earth in a condition mean and despised of men but the great God of Heaven is pleased to take such notice of me as even from Heaven to call me by my name and to single me out for Grace and Salvation and not onely to mention my name from above in the gracious offer of his Ordinances but to write it in the eternal Register of Heaven What care I to be inglorious yea causelesly infamous with men whiles I am thus honored by the King of glory XCIII It is the great wisdom and providence of the Almighty so to order the dispositions and inclinations of men that they affect divers and different works and pleasures Some are for manuary trades others for intellectual imployments One is for the Land another for the Sea one for husbandry another for merchandise one is for Architecture another for Vestiary services one is for fishing another for pasturage and in the learned trades one is for the mistress of Sciences Divinity another for the Law whether Civil or Municipal a third is for the search of the secrets of Nature and the skill and practice of Physick and each one of these divides it self into many differing varieties Neither is it otherwise in matter of pleasures one places his delight in following his Hawk and Hound another in the harmony of Musick one makes his Garden his paradise and enjoys the flourishing of his fair Tulips another findes contentment in a choice Library one loves his Bowl or his Bowe another pleases himself in the patient pastime of his Angle For surely if all men affected one and the same trade of life or pleasure of recreation it were not possible that they could live one by another Neither could there be any use of commerce whereby mans life is maintained neither could it be avoyded but that the envy of the inevitable rivality would cut each others throat It is good reason we should make a right use of this gracious and provident dispensation of the Almighty and therefore that we should improve our several dispositions and faculties to the advancing of the common stock and withal that we should neither encroach upon each others profession nor be apt to censure each others recreation XCIV He were very quick-sighted that could perceive the growing of the grass or the moving of the shadow upon the Dial yet when those are done every eye doth easily discern them It is no otherwise in the progress of grace which how it increaseth in the soul and by what degrees we cannot hope to perceive but being grown we may see it It is the fault of many Christians that they depend too much upon sense and make that the judg of their spiritual estate being too much dejected when they do not sensibly feel the proofs of their proficiency and the present proceedings of their regeneration why do they not as well question the growth of their stature because they do not see every day how much they are thriven Surely it must needs be that spiritual things are less perceptible then bodily much more therefore must we in these wait upon time for necessary conviction and well may it suffice us if upon an impartial comparing of the present measure of our knowledg faith obedience with the former we can perceive our selves