not onely in the aliens reprobates but euen in the domesticks of the houshold of faith in thy most inlightned and best disposed children euen in the Elect themselues and those that are sealed vp for the Day of Redemption Wherefore I must say freely as I may truly I am thy workemanship not onely of thy power as all other creatures are but of thy mercy also created in Christ vnto good workes whereof he is the sole Author and Actor working effecaciously in mee both the will and the deed according to his good pleasure O Lord giue me a liuely Faith thy Gift alone which hath power to quicken my dull to enlyue my dead to purifie my impure heart Giue me grace stedfastly to beleeue thy Word to take sure hold of thy promises euermore to cleaue and sticke fast to thy goodnesse Kindle this fire in my soule which will inflame my loue of all good duties on the one and on the other side waste and consume eate vp and de uoure my concupiscence and all my carnall desires and cause them to returne into that dead sea whence they were first exhaled Renew a right Spirit within me Hee whose spirit is deserted by Gods Spirit loseth the vigor and viuacity of his spirit his spirit waxeth old crooked in him Sinne where it inuades makes such spoile and hauocke of all goodnesse and vertue in the soule as it cannot subsist vnlesse it be timely repaired and truly renewed by repentance When a man lyes groueling vpon earthly and houering vpon fleshly desires his spirit which should directly 〈◊〉 vpward is bowed downe and made crooked A 〈◊〉 spirit then is a sincere and vpright heart raysed and lifted vp into heauen and heauenly things What is sinne else but an obliquity a depriuation or deprauation of that rectitude and vprightnesse which was originally and should be continually in the soule if it were throughly purged and purified I haue impayred this rectitude and vprightnesse which once I had in some measure by my heynous and enormous transgressions and therefore resort to thee for helpe who onely art able to renewe and repaire it againe Giue me O Lord a spirit rectified in it selfe directed by thy Spirit corrected by thy discipline and erected to thy glory a spirit firme without failing constant without varying and durable without decaying that I may happily choose new waies walke in them carefully and perseuere in them constantly giue me grace to turne ouer a new leafe as they say to abandon the old man with the lusts and affections thereof and to put on the new man and so to serue thee in holinesse and newnesse of liuing all the dayes of my life hereafter I doe wittingly and thankefully ascribe the purity of my heart to thy Creation the vprightnesse of my spirit to thy renouation alone as to giue thee thy due honour so to preuent and anticipate the proud and fond conceit of those men if any such there be or shall be hereafter who to grace thēselues wil abate the power diminish the lustre of thy grace who though they cannot but confesse that they neede the assistance of thy Spirit that they are holpen by thy both preuenting and following grace yet betweene those two graces for their own credit will needes vainely interpose or rather violētly intrude mans reason whereby he chuseth what is good and mans will whereby he assenteth to thy diuine power in the blessed worke of regeneration But hereby I take secret comfort in my selfe to preserue my perplexed soule from vtter despaire that I discerne the foulenesse of my heart feele the weaknes of my spirit and therefore pray earnestly for a purification of the one and a renouation of the other for I know I cannot craue either of those graces without some measure of grace As the sunne cannot be seene but by the Sunne nor the light be perceiued but by meanes of the light so neither can I begge a full cleansing of my heart without some cleanenesse in it nor a through-renouation without some newnesse in my decayed spirit at least in true affection and vnfaigned desire Cast me not away from thy presence and take not thy holy Spirit from me I feare and cannot but feare thy face and yet I feare withall to be cast from thy face 〈◊〉 presence Mine owne 〈◊〉 makes me on the one side to feare the face of a seuere Iudge and my worthlesse weaknesse on the other being not able to subsist at all without the light of thy countenance makes mee desire thy presence and sight What-euer thou doe with me while thou lookest vpon me I shall indure though not without feare and perplexity But if thou cast me quite away from thy presence I am vtterly vndone for euer The presence of the Physicion is a present if not helpe yet comfort to the sicke patient But thy presence Lord being the soueraigne Physicion ministers all comforts and cures all maladies both of soule and body Therefore I loue the habitations of thy house and the place where 〈◊〉 honour dwelleth As the hunted and chased Hart desireth the water brookes So longeth my soule after thee When shall I come and appeare before thee O how amiable are thy Tabernacles My soule euen longeth and fainteth for the courts of the Lord. One day in thy Courts where thou art present and resident is better then a thousand elsewhere I had rather bee a dorekeeper there then to dwell at liberty and in iollity in the tents of the vngodly The priuation of Gods presence is the position of all misery and the withdrawing of his countenance drawes with it all manner of discomforts Heauen it selfe were not heauen if thou wert not there present and Hell could not be hell if thou wert not absent thence To bee cast out of thy presence is to be cast out of ioy into sorrow out of light into darkenesse out of life into death not the first onely but the second also out of heauē into hel The very sight and vision of thee is of it selfe and in it selfe the height of happinesse In thy presence is the fulnesse of ioy and at thy right hand is plenty without satiety of pleasure and delight for euermore Wherefore though I haue multiplyed and increased my contumacie beyond all measure yet I beseech thee O Lord not to excommunicate me I submit my selfe with teares in mine eyes and anguish in my heart humbly and wholly to thy discipline I am content to endure any penance rather then to bee banished from thy presence What the want of this presence is none can know but he that feeleth and he that feeleth cannot make another know by any relation Hee may indeuour to shaddow it out slenderly but hee is not able fully to expresse it If the Master turne his seruant out of doores if the Father abandon his sonne from his fight if the King command his subiect from the Court that hee come not within the Vierge how
pleasing because they were offered with a louing and sincere heart vnto thee Thou doest not accept the person for the sacrifice but the sacrifice for the persons sake The truth and sincerity of the heart is all in all with thee Lastly that it is not so much any vprightnesse in me in regard of the worth and dignity much lesse of the perfection and purity of it that ministers this comfort vnto mee but as it is a fruit of thy fauour and a token of thy loue not it selfe so much as that whereof it giueth me assurance and that in two respects First as it is a signe and seale of my Adoption assuring me that I am thine adopted child For my regeneration whereby this sincerity is wrought in me doeth ratifie and seale vp my Adoption the old man harboureth no such ghest None are thy Adopted but such as are thy regenerated children and on the other part all that are thine by Regeneration are thine by Adoption also Now as earthly parents loue their children not so much for their wit and comelinesse as because they are theirs so doest thou O God loue thy children because they are thy children If thou doest not loue them before they haue they shall neuer haue any thing to make them bee loued of thee So then this beginning of true grace argueth thy child and a weake child of thine being yet thy child as well as a strong may in that regard expect a childes portion in thy heauenly inheritance Secondly as it is an earnest or Gods-penny of my glorification For this sincerity is the earnest of that Spirit which thou giuest me before-hand for full 〈◊〉 of the faithfull performance of all thy gracious promises afterward Therefore as a penny giuen in earnest bin deth as strongly as a pound the person that giueth it being a sufficient man Euen so the least measure of true grace being thy earnest bindes thee to the faithfull ac complishment of all thy fauours promised to all thy faithful seruants whatsoeuer It is thou only ô Lord that preparest my heart and workest this truth in it and thou wilt neuer frustrate the desire that thou thy selfe hast there wrought As no man canseeke thee but hee that hath found thee so no man can desire grace but hee that hath grace for euermore hee that desireth Grace hath grace to desire it It is thy gracious Proclamation The Lord God will be mercifull yea hee hath beene alreadie and is mercifull to those that set their hearts aright that desire to feare his name Whereupon I take heart and say Then shall I not bee confounded when I haue respect to all thy precepts and when I am vpright with my God The louing kindnesse of the Lord is from euer and for euer vpon those that thinke vpon his commandements to doe them and therefore vnto such also is ioy in plaine termes promised The righteous shall bee glad in the Lord and trust in him and all without exception that are but vpright in heart shall reioyce And therefore hauing by warrant of the blessed Spirit pronounced them blessed not that neuer sinned but that haue sincerely repented their sinnes and in whose soule there is no guile I conclude with an Iniunction awarded vnder the seale of the same Spirit and laid vpon all such to reioyce Be glad ye righteous and reioyce in the Lord be merry not onely in your owne selues and soules but euen with acclamations and iubilations shout for ioy all you that are vpright in heart The summe of all is I doe not finde my heart so free from sin or so full of grace as it would and should bee but I finde it to be true plaine and vpright wherein I appeale to thee O thou searcher of hearts not such as hath no sinne for it hath in a manner nothing but sinne but such as loues no sinne not such as wants no grace but such as is hum bled for want of grace hauing the grace to feele that want 6. In the secret of my heart thou shalt teach me wisdome or Thou shalt teach the seacrets of wisdome in my heart or hidden part THe conscience of my vnfained sorrow for sin on the one side my true desire to serue thee better hereafter on the other doe raise my dciected soule and make me beleeue and hope that thou in thy gracious goodnesse wilt teach me more wisedome euen the mystery of godlinesse and art of Religion which is the soule of the soule in the secret of my heart I say thou shalt because I begge earnestly and hope confidently that thou wilt teach mee such Wisedome The teaching of the inward man by the true instruction of heauenly wisdome the end wherof is eternall saluation belongeth to thee alone It is thy proper and peculiar worke whereupon thine elect ones are termed The taught of God for flesh and blood reueales not these things vnto me Hee hath his chaire in heauen that teacheth the heart and to thy schollers it is only giuen to know the secrets of thy Kingdome Therefore I trust thou wilt teach me thy wayes and thy statutes thou wilt open mine eyes that I may sce the wonders of thy Law thou wilt giue me true vnderstanding and send me thy good Spirit as a perfect Pylot to leade and guide me into all truth goodnesse This is the wisedome of the heart and brest not of the head and braine whereby I shall become not more learned or politicke but more godly 〈◊〉 vertuous not more able to discourse and dispute but to doe and liue well 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 become righteous that is by a little variati on of the word right wise For whē all is said done That is right wisedome which makes me wise vnto Saluation That is not seeming and shining but sound and solid wisedome that is reall and operatiue not speculatiue and formall wisedome The true information and thereby Reformation of the soule is the soule of wisedome It is neuer taught enough which is neuer sufficiently learned and this wisedome is of that nature that the soule is neuer satiated therewith but is still hungry and couetous of more I haue heard and read many lessons by way of instruction in this wisedome but either through my dulnesse I could not apprehend them or through my obliuion I could not remember thē or through my infirmity I could not practise them Howbcit by the supereminent authority of thee the Teacher the excellencie of the matter taught and the increase of my diligence all happily concurring together I hope at length to attaine the depth of wisedome in the deepe and secret corners of my heart 7 Purge me with Hysope and I shall be cleane THe tongue wil be licking where the tooth is aking the finger will be touching where the paine is fretting The Leprosie of my sinne is so irkesome and lothsome vnto mee as
I cannot but it erate my earnest Petition and re-enforce my humble Prayer to bee purged thereof and for the fitter application and better operation of the purgation to bee purged with Hysope Thou O Lord didst appoint Hysope to be vsed in thy Law for diuers purposes In the institution of the Passeouer the blood of the Lambe was appointed to bee sprinkled vpon the doore cheekes with a bunch of Hysope and with a Scarlet lace In the purgation of the Leper the bunch of Hysope was to bee dipped in the blood of the Sparrow In the burning of the red Heifer which was to bee chosen without spot or wrinckle the Priest was to put in Hysope besides Cedar wood and Scarlet By the blood of the Lambe the Sparrow and the red Heifer the blood of that immaculate Lambe was vndoubtedly prefigured and represented By the bunch of Hysope the besprinkling of the soule with that blood and the applying of it thereunto by faith by the red or crimson lace the vnion and communion of thy Saints was shaddowed who are tyed together by a True-loues knot and sprinkled with that same blood for the remission of their sinnes Whiles I suruey the vertues and qualities of this herbe to vnfold this riddle of thy Law I may iustly take occasion as to magnifie thy goodnesse O God who hast prouided so powerfull a medicine to cure all mans corruptions so to obserue thy wisedome who for our better apprehension hast so fitted the signe and figure to the thing signified and represented thereby Hysope whence I borrow this Allegory hath many things whereby it doth aptly and neerly resemble Christ. It is obscure base and low the Hysope as the lowest herbe is opposed to the Cedar as the tallest tree In the person of Christ I haue said I am a worme and no man the reproach of men and despised of the people all they that see me doe scoffe at me they 〈◊〉 a mowe with the lip and they wagge the head Hysope growes of it selfe among stones not planted by man Christ was hewne out of the Rocke without hands Hysope is bitter and sowre vnpleasing to the taste so Christ his Crosse by which we are crucified to the world the world vnto vs is harsh and vnsauourie to flesh and blood Though Hysope bee sowre it is wholesome for the body The bitter medicines are euer the better so the Recipe of repentance albeit odious to the flesh is most profitable to the soule The doctrine which is seasoned with salt and Hysope is fitter for vs then that which is sweetened with honey For on the one side honey was neuer appointed to be vsed in any sacrifice on the other side not any sacrifice but was to bee seasoned with salt Hysope as Physicians tell is powerfull to purge the lungs The humility of Christ like Hysope doth purge our pride which floteth in the lungs and is discouered by the fuming puffing and blowing thereof Hysope being hot in operation doth cut and extenuate the grosse and flegmaticke humours of the body So true grace takes away all the dulnesse and drowzinesse of my Spirit makes me feruent in prayers and zealous in holy duties Hysope euacuateth the body nourisheth the natiue colour cureth the biting of Serpents prouoketh the appetite sharpeneth the sight warmeth the blood cooleth Feauers So grace purgeth by contrition spitteth foorth by confession warmeth by charitie seasoneth by temperance quencheth the fiery inflamations of vnruly passions maketh vs hungry after righteousnesse quicke-sighted to discerne our own errours and faults yeeldeth remedies against the stings of concupiscence restores againe that spirituall vigour which we daily lose by our manifold transgressions Hysope hath many vertues and properties if well vsed for the health of our bodies But that which is shaddowed by it towit the bloud of Christ cures all the diseases of the soule and clenseth vs from all our sinnes With Hysope this blood is sprinkled vpon vs that is by faith it is applied to our consciences to purge and purifie them from dead workes 7 Wash me O Lord and I shall be whiter then snow BEcause I finde my selfe so spotted with the staines so polluted with the dirt and drosse of my sinne so soone soyled againe after my washing euen in the teares of repentance so prone with the Dog to returne to my vomit with the Hog to the myre wherein I formerly wallowed therefore I harpe still vpon this string which I touched before I doe iterate this Petition also and cry againe Wash me c. If thou Lord bee pleased to wash mee often and thorowly I shall not onely be freed from the foule blacknesse which my grieuous sinnes haue cast vpon mee but I shall become neate faire and white yea whiter then snow If I wash my selfe with snow water saith holy Iob and make my hands neuer so cleane yet shalt thou plunge me in the ditch or myre that is thou shalt discouer an vncleannes in me which was not perceiued before and mine own clothes shall abhorre me But if thou Lord bee pleased to wash me I shall be whiter then snow that is I shall abandon all euill affections and preserue my heart pure and holy consecrating all the faculties of my soule and members of my body to thy true and sincere seruice Can the Blackamore change his skinne or the Leopard quit his spots If that cannot be yet thou O Lord canst so wash me that I shall be whiter then snow That which is impossible by nature is possible and factible by grace That foulenesse which is propagated to mee by discent and bred in me by naturall generation as also nourished and increased by continual actuall transgression is not only remooued but quite changed by free iustification and supernaturall regeneration If my sinnes bee as red as skarlet thou canst make them as white as wooll if they bee like crimson thou canst make them whiter then snow O wonderfull mysterie O incomprehensible miracle that blood should make me white that the washing and bathing of my soule in the blood of that immaculate Lambe should make wee whiter then snow that euen the garments of thy Saints by washing in this blood should become white which yet shall bee reuealed to and wrought vpon thy Saints I shall bee white heere by grace yea whiter then snow I shall bee bright heereafter in glory brighter then the starres yea then the Sunne in the firmament grace heere shall be the beginning of glory there and glory there shall bee the complement and perfection of grace here This is arcanum 〈◊〉 diuini a secret of thy Diuine state and gouernement which thou shalt I am hopefull thou wilt not onely teach by infallible demonstration but also worke by thy blessed Spirit his powerfull operation in the secrets of my heart The cause of the snow his whitenesse is held by Philosophers to bee the store of ayre shut vp by the
extremity of cold in the cleere water that distilleth from the cloudes Thy celestiall ayre and light which surpasseth all bodily and naturall whitenesse being gathered into my soule when it is melting into the teares of repentance makes it cleere and bright euen to admiration Christ by washing my soule hath taken my spots out of mee vpon himselfe hee himselfe remaines all 〈◊〉 and stained with my sinnes insomuch that the Spouse is amazed at it and wondring demands Wherfore doest thou weare garments all spotted and dyed with blood like vnto them that stampe grapes in the wine-presse Thy seruant Moses out of his kinde and vndeserued loue tooke an Aethiopian woman to his wife No wife is deformed in her owne husbands eyes if he be such a husband as he ought to be The mysticall Moses who in loue hath married himselfe vnto his Spouse the Church not onely blacke and deformed but vgly and filthy in her selfe hath by his gracious election of her though neither by her beauty nor manners recommended vnto him made her because he so esteemeth her faire comely and graceful he hath changed her color and complection yea and her nature and condition too so as she sticks not to say I was black by nature but I am faire by grace Can that which is blacke as Pitch or Ebeny become perfectly white and whiter then snow yes verily for my state by adoption and regeneration in Christ is of more perfection then Adam his happiest condition in Paradise This might and did faile that can neuer alter or decay but abides firme and sure to all eternity Blacke by the art of man can take no other hue nor can this whitenes by the fraud or force of the prince of darkenesse be euer either darkned or defaced Snow is white without and within on euery side Thy Grace will make mee not like a painted sepulcher faire without and foule within not hypocritically specious but really sound and sincere and the beauty of the soule thus washed will infinitely exceede the whitenesse of any body yea euen of snow it selfe Make mee to heare of 〈◊〉 and gladnesse c. O Lord I beg of thee the whole tree of life growing by the riuer side in the Garden of Eden whose roote is iustification by remission of my sinnes and whose fruite is true ioy and consolation in thy gracious fauour There may bee a roote without a stocke as when a Tree is hewne downe a stocke without 〈◊〉 as in the winter season but nor fruite nor stocke where no roote is The forgiuenesse of my sinne is the root of all my ioy O Lord giue me the fruite of that roote and that will assure me of the roote of that fruite Vnlesse thou make me I cannot heare Vnlesse thou open mine eare the voice of gladnesse will not enter or if it goe in at the one it will go out at the other eare I shall be neuer the better for hearing Thou must not only tel me the tale but finde me eares also thou must not onely present the obiect but enable my faculty also to perceiue or receiue it The Adder or Cockatrice is as some say naturally as some others cunningly deafe laying the one eare close to that ground stopping the other with his tayle purposely to preuent the skill of the Charmer who seekes to enchant him in such sort as he shall not be able either to bite or sting So man in his pure or rather impure naturals is either sencelesly deafe and cannot or voluntarily deafe and will not heare any voice that tends to the spirituall solace of his soule no not the sound of sound ioy not the melodious noise of true gladnesse vnlesse thou that sendest the tidings of Grace doe giue him the grace also to entertaine those tidings Now what is the end and indeuor either of this corruption by nature or peruersenesse by will but that none of thy words or spels O God none of thy holy Spirit his motions or inclinations may haue power wickednesse being so powerfull to charme or inchant me but that I may still bite and sting still hurt and annoy both my selfe and others I desire ioy and gladnesse doubled that is both of soule and body and I cannot rest contented with one or two or a few comforts I seeke to haue them multiplied that as my tribulations were increased so in like proportion my consolations may be inlarged and I terme this ioy and gladnesse indefinitely because this is the onely solid ioy and true gladnesse All other ioyes are but toyes like false fires and counterfet 〈◊〉 such as deserue not the name of ioyes at all I beseech thee O Lord not onely to blot out my transgressions and to take away the guilt of my sins but for the raising of my deiected the relieuing of my distressed soule to let me know so much also let me heare this ioyfull Word in the eare of my heart from thine owne mouth by thine holy breath and Spirit Thy sins are forgiuen thee Not onely bee vnto me a Sauiour but say vnto my soule I am thy saluation For I may stand pardoned and iustified in thy gracious 〈◊〉 and certaine resolution and yet not know so much and not knowing it how can I be but grieuously perplexed fearefully distracted in my conscious distrustfull cogitations Wherefore O Lord let thy Spirit certifie my spirit that All is peace Let my soule sensibly feele though it cannot fully conceiue this peace which passeth all vnderstanding To a Prisoner conuicted and condemned for high treason to cruell death and euery houre expecting execution according to course of Iustice what greater ioy can there bee then to heare of a gracious and free pardon of all his offences from his Soueraigne This is the true character of my selfe and euery other sinner in respect of our spirituall condition Wee were damned before wee were borne in sinne since our birth wee haue liued in sinne we haue multiplied sinne vpon sinne wee haue drunke vp iniquity as a fish drinketh vp water wee haue committed sundry hainous and horrible treasons against thy diuine 〈◊〉 to say nothing of other capitall crimes wee haue after all this wilfully drawne downe thine indignation and called for thine eternall vengeance vpon vs In this deplorable and euen desperate case what more welcome tydings then to heare of this Iubile Sinne doth not onely bring me into a dull slumber but euen into a dead sleepe also In sleepe all my sences are bound vp as it were in chaines when I am fast asleepe I heare nothing at all Wherefore awake me O Lord and make me to heare Make mee to heare thy Word the conduit of comfort openly taught with such diligence and deuotion as is meete make mee to heare the secret whisperings of thy blessed Spirit with such reuerence and obedience as is requisite make me so to heare as I may beleeue faith commeth by hearing with thy blessing
kind of mercy to put men to death quickely This Martyrdome of mortification God doth highly prize without that other which is by effusion of blood this must goe before that and that without this is of no worth nor deserues the name of Martyrdome at all Whose Martyrdome shall I dare to compare with the various hideous and tedious sufferings of holy Iob The best is this contention for immortalitie will not onely be mortall but soone at an end The Martyrs of both sorts so I tearme them because they dye in and for thee shall haue fulnesse of felicity to satiate their largest desires for they both shall haue both ioy without measure and life without end they shall both enioy abundance of pleasures at thy right hand for euermore The summe of all is I must drench and drowne my sinnes and the corrupt affections of my wicked heart in the sea of sorrowfull repentance and then my soule will nimbly and swiftly swim to the land of promise and hauen of happinesse They that will offer this sacrifice their hearts must fall from the high mountaine of pride downe into the lowest valley of humiliation and they must bee bruised with the fall pained with the bruise I will present an humble bruised and sorrowfull heart vnto thee Thou O Lord art nigh to them that are of a contrite spirit who speake to thee in bitternesse their soule who crye like the Draggon and Ostriche for griefe of their sinnes committed They who cry De profundis out of the deepe are not in the deepe their very crye reares and raises them vp Thine eare is within mans heart thou perceiuest the hearts first relenting before it come to the tongues relating I did purpose and say within my selfe I will confesse my sinne and thou tookest notice thereof and forgauest the iniquity of my sinne Thus saith the High and lofty One that inhabiteth eternity whose Name is holy 〈◊〉 dwell in the High and holy place with whom with him that is of a contrite and humble spirit to what end to reuiue the spirit of the humble and to reuiue the heart of the contrite ones Thou wilt not despise nay thou wilt highly prize graciously receiue 〈◊〉 and comfort thou wilt giue them beauty for ashes the oyle of ioy for mourning the garment of gladnesse for the spirit of heauinesse As a bone in the arme or legge once broken and being well set againe growes stronger then if it had neuer beene broken so our hearts being well and soundly healed by true repentance of the sores and bruises of sinne become more firme and stable then euer they were before Thus my foule fall becomes foelix culpa I am after a sort happy in my vnhappinesse for out of my great misery through thy greatest mercy a greater happinesse doth arise then euer I felt before 18 O be fauourable to Sion for thy good pleasure HEE that prayes to thee must not pray for himselfe alone Howsoeuer hee beginne with prayer for himselfe when he hath gained some interest in thee for himselfe hee may the sooner preuaile for others hee must end with prayer for thy Church hee must not end till hee haue recommended the whole Church in his prayers vnto thee He that is a liuely and feeling member of that mysticall body whereof thy Christ is the head must pray for the whole body As in the naturall body the heart feeles the akeing of the head and the head the oppression of the heart the heart and head both doe resent a fellon in one of the fingers and the gowt in one of the toes the stomacke simpathizeth with the braine and the braine with the stomacke so and much more is it in the mysticall body True Christians are like those Twynnes who are reported to haue wept and laughed slept and waked liued and dyed together They must weepe with them that weepe mourne with those that lament suffer hunger thirst nakednesse and imprisonment with others their brethren afflicted with such crosses participate with them in all their miseries and aduersities what soeuer Captaine Vriah mine honest seruant could say The Arke and Israel and Iudah abide in Tents and my Lord Ioab and the seruants of my Lord are incamped in the open field and shall I then goe into my house to eate and drinke and lye with my Wife While they are in ieopardy I cannot be in iollity while they liue in feare I cannot enioy security Wherefore be fauourable to Sion to thy Church and chosen I being one of them must abide one and the same fortune and condition with them This is that vnion of the Saints in thy Christ that communion of them among themselues which cannot easily bee comprehended much lesse fully expressed and yet must it bee constantly belieued and will be in some measure continually resented The Church is represented by the name of Sion Sion the holy Mountaine in Hierusalem which thou louest from whence thy lawe should come and where thou wilt dwell for euer Iehouah hath chosen Sion and desired it for his seate and said This is my rest here will I sit euen to perpetuity But besides this generall I acknowledge my selfe tyed by a speciall obligation to pray for Sion for there was no let on my part but that the whole kingdome of thy Christ might haue fallen to the ground for I being raised from the dunghill to the Diadem from the Parke to the Pallace from following the Ewes great with young to feede thy people and anoynted King to the end I should gather thy Church together by my Apostasie haue scattered and wasted it so farre forth as there is great cause to feare the vtter ruine and desolation thereof Wherefore by force and in remorse of conscience I beg for the sustentation and preseruation of thy Church through thy free and vndeserued mercy Thou O Lord art the onely founder of this choise Company and corporation As out of thy loue onely thou didst single and select them from other refuse people before the foundation of the world as by the same loue thou hast supported and preserued them amids all dangers and disasters euer sithence so I beseech thee still to continue thine ancient accustomed and affectionate fauour to them Let not my vnhappinesse impeach their happinesse let not the darke and foggy mists of my wickednes ecclipse the light and luster of thy countenance towards them let them be still as deare vnto thee as the apple of thine owne eye doe not spill them for my faults but spare mee and them for thine owne sake Thou doest often and mayest alwaies punish the people for the sins of their Princes Wherefore I beseech thee not onely to pardon my sins to my selfe but to be fauourable to my people also and not to suffer them to smart and suffer for my offences It is I that haue sinned and done euill indeed but as for these sheepe what haue they done let
things in heauen earth for the seruice of man and man for thy seruice who hast disposed all things in number 〈◊〉 and measure who hast caused all things contained in holy Writ to be recorded for the instruction and direction of thy Church and chosen giue me grace so to behold this mirror of humane frailety and diuine mercy with the eye of true iudgement that I may not with the Spider draw poyson to the destruction but with the Bee sucke such honey as may bee gathered out of it to the solace of my sinfull soule Thou diddest permit Dauid being an holy Prophet as well as a mighty King aduanced anoynted specially for the gouernement of thy people to fall fouly into the heynous and grieuous sinnes of Adultery and Murder that no man might presume of thy fauor or confide in his owne strength but euermore serue thee in feare and reioyce in thee with reuerence Thou didst also endue him with grace after his fall by humiliation and repentance to rise againe and recouer his former estate notwithstanding his long security and carelesse continuance vpon the dregs of his wickednesse as it were in contempt of thy Iustice that no man might dispaire of thy rich and tender mercy Thou didst propound his fall for caution that all men might shun that dangerous racke whereon he suffered shipwracke his repentance for imitation that euery man plunged into the sea of sinne might catch hould of the planke of repentance to saue himselfe from drowning As thou didst bring light out of darkenesse and life out of death so dost thou in an incomprehensible manner draw good out of euill turne the very sinnes of thy seruants to thy glory and their good Farre be it from mee to vouch this example by way of excuse or defence much lesse warrant to offend as hee did howbeit 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 hope confidently with Dauid when and after I haue offended through thy gracious goodnesse and free promise by the teares of mine eyes the contrition of my heart and prayer of my spirit to obtaine a full and gracious pardon of all my offences whatsoeuer Thou canst not O Lord but be highly displesed when wormes of the earth dust and ashes rottennesse and corruption hauing without any desert at all beene adorned with thy gifts and enlightened with thy graces shall presume of thy fauour so farre as vngraciously and vngratefully instead of thankes and prayses to returne contempts and dishonours to thy diuine Maiesty But on the other side thou canst in no wise endure that the most wretched caitiffe the most shamefull and wilfull sinner that Satan can furnish out of hell should despaire of thine endlesse and bottomelesse mercy wherein aboue all other things thou dost so much delight and glory which doth so farre surmount thy iustice as thou dost continually wooe inuite thy greatest enemies to the participation thereof O Lord being a sinner as Dauid was I cannot but pray for mercy as he did and because I haue grieuosly sinned pray for great mercy and because I haue many times and many waies multiplied my sins so as they are growne to a number numberlesses pray for a multitude of thy tender mercies that the whole debt-booke wherein my sinnes are registred may be quite crossed and defaced I must begge againe and againe that thou wilt wash me againe againe wash mee thorowly from the pollution and filth of my sinne Giue me grace O Lord to see my sinnes fully to confesse them freely intirely to giue thee the glory to take the shame to my selfe deseruedly Giue me leaue to lay open my festred wounds and lothsome sores to thy viewe in abasement and humiliation to stirre thy bowels of tender commiseration Make me to loue in my selfe what thou louest inme to wit truth and sincerity of heart accept O Lord my honest study and faithfull indeuour for true and full performance Let me solace my soule in the conscience of my vnfained sorrow for my sins past and my true though weake desires to serue thee better in time to come for which purpose enable me with wisedome teach me the art of godlinesse and the mysteries thereof in my hidden parts And because the Leprosie of sin hath infected mee from top to toe temper and prepare for mee a powerfull purgation with those ingredients which are of strongest operation that is without shadowes or figures the bloud of that Immaculate Lambe slayne from the beginning of the world applied by a liuely faith to my diseased soule Be pleased to bathe my vgly soule in thy Lauer of Iustification till I become white and bright in thy pure and piercing eyes Let mee when I am confounded in my selfe and cast downe into the Dungeon of Sorrow through the sight of my sinnes yet hopefully and zealously seeke ioy and comfort in thee and thy saluation Let mee so place my sinnes before mine owne sorrowfull face that thou mayest hide thy face at least thine angry face from them or rather so quite deface them that they may 〈◊〉 be to be seene hereafter that they may 〈◊〉 rise vp in iudgement either to shame me in this or condemne me in the next world And because my iustification which consists in thy free remission of my sinnes cannot subsist without sanctification and holinesse of conuersation as the light of that Lampe and heate of that fire And because it is impossible to draw a cleane out of an vncleane thing I beseech thee Lord to worke a wonder on me that is to create a cleane heart within mee Purge the fountain and then the streames which 〈◊〉 from it in my thoughts words and actions will be clearer and purer Giue mee a 〈◊〉 spirit that 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 carry my selfe 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 thee and for 〈◊〉 this spirit 〈◊〉 becomes decayed and distorted by the peruersnesse of my nature and obliquity of my transgressions vouchsafe to renew it in me from time to time by a continuall supply of thy heauenly grace Although I haue many wayes and times deserued thy iust indignatiō yet for thy mercies sake abandon me not from thy presence banish mee not from thy Courts let me behold thy face though ouerclouded with a storme of displeasure Although I haue grieued yea and despighted thy good spirit when it endeauoured my reformation direction and consolation yet I beseech thee not to take it vtterly from me let not that holy fire though raked vp vnder the ashes of my sins bee quite extinguished When thou doest for my sinnes bereaue mee of the comfortable confidence I found in the assurance of thy saluation giue mee leaue to claime still mine interest in it euen when I tremble and quake at thy iudgements and thereby to craue a restitution of that tranquility of minde and peace of conscience which I formerly enioyed with contentment make mee by the want rightly to value the worth of so great a fauour then which
the Third part of the Christian Warfare which gaue the first ouerture to our accquaintance and begat sundry conferences betweene vs sithence to my no small comfort as I doe in all thankefulnesse professe Whether it shall dye in your hands vpon your priuate perusall or liue a while and so passe further through the hands of others I leaue wholy to your discretion You shall beare the blame on the one side howsoeuer you bee like to receiue small thankes on the other The God of all consolation returne with interest into your owne bosome those comsorts which you so freely and plentifully haue imparted vnto other Yours in true Christian affection I. B. THE PSALME OF MERCY OR A MEDITATION vpon the 51. Psalme by a true Penitent To the chiefe Musician A Psalme of Dauid when Nathan the Prophet came vnto him after he had gone in to Bathsheba THE ARGVMENT AFter that Dauid in many successefull battailes was become a Conqueror and had defeated and destroyed the Syrians and Mesopotamians who came to succor the Ammonites his Opposites hauing now no enemy abroad of any account to encounter withall he was surprized by his dangerous enemy at home and taken prisoner by Securitie he grew by Plenty and Prosperity as it commonly fares with men in such case forgetfull of his former miseries and God his singular mercies and was captiuated wholy by his lustfull desires and sinfull concupiscence For not contented to take by stealth Vriah his wife from him in his absence while hee was imployed in his seruice but which is the nature of sinne still to increase and multiply to his foule Adultery hee added cruell Murther giuing order to his trusty Commaunder Ioab to marshall him in the front and poynt of those Israelites who did assaile the Suburbs of Rabbah when there was no possibility at least no probability of preuailing and which could not but bee more displeasing to God was wittingly contented that many other his best seruants and soldiers vnder Vriah his command should perish with Vriah for company to cloake and disguise his particular wicked designe against him To omit his practice in calling Vriah from the Warres and sending him home both sober and drunke though he went not at all to couer the shame and shadow the sin which Dauid had committed she being then with child by him no sooner was Vriah slaine but hee married the widdow whom being a wife hee had defiled and so securely enioyed the forbidden fruite of his filthy pleasure and mischieuous Policie till Nathan the Prophet was specially sent as an Herald to summon and challenge checke and reprooue him for these manifold defections and manifest rebellions against God Now the time of Nathan his comming to Dauid is purposely recorded to shew that Dauid was in a kind of Lethargy for about a yeeres space as it is collected by the story which is a strange and remarkable thing that so great a person so endued with God his excellent Spirit could sleepe and snort in the bed of security as if he had beene quite bereaued of the sence and life of Piety and out of his wits as it were for so large a time For who would not thinke and say he was bewitched by Satan benummed with the spirit of slumber growne if not obstinately contemptuous yet retchlesly careles of God his Iudgements Which circumstance as it doth much aggrauate his fault that hee felt not true remorce of conscience till the Prophet Nathan came to rowze and raise him so doth it exceedingly amplify the mercy and goodnesse of God who when ordinary meanes of Prayer reading and meditating of Gods Word could not worke and preuaile with him for who can imagine that such a person could altogether in that time want such helpes addressed an extraordinary Ambassador euen one of his Prophets a Prophet to a Prophet a Phisicion to a Phisicion but to a sicke Phisicion who could not cure himselfe to handle and search his wounds to touch him to the quick and so to reduce him to a sound and sincere repentance Now who on the one side doth not tremble and quake to thinke of this fearefull example that so holy a Prophet so worthy a King could after so foule a fall lye so long in this dyrt and myre and bee so ouerwhelmed with such a beastly and sencelesse sluggishnesse On the other part whose heart is not rauished with delight and euen resolued into teares of ioy and comfort to behold such a mirrour of Gods mercy in Dauid after hee had plunged himselfe into so many and manifold great and grieuous sinnes as were folded vp in those capitall crimes of Adultery and Murther that hee should yet finde grace to rise againe by Repentance obtaine pardon of all his sinnes and be restored and reintegrated into God his speciall loue and fauour So then the Title tells both the tyme and occasion of composing this Psalme which doth passionately declare and liuely expresse Dauid his humiliation sorrow and discontentment for the offences he had done and publish and record to posterity a forme and Modell as it were of penitent prayer to be vsed by Sorrowfull Sinners in all succeeding ages This excellent Ditty of the sweet Singer of 〈◊〉 was as the Title purports recommended to him that excelled to wit the 〈◊〉 of the 〈◊〉 or 〈◊〉 Chanter to be 〈◊〉 into a note 〈◊〉 tune fit for it and to bee played vpon an Instrument of Musike called Neginoth that the Art 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 might 〈◊〉 as all other humane arts ought to bee accessary and seruiceable to the aduancement of diuine glory For the fashion was in those times to sing such Hymnes artificially set and tuned to some Instrument in the publike Assemblies that by the melody of the eare the Iubilation of the heart might be enlarged THE ANALYSIS or Resolution of the Psalme THis is a penitentiall Psalme and the chiefe of the penitentials in common account a liuely mirror of a true penitent and a zealous prayer of a mournefull soule oppressed with the weight and perplexed with the sight of sinne The prayer is either Speciall for himselfe such are all the petitions to the 18. verse Generall for the whole Church in the 18. verse and so to the end As repentance hath two parts To lament and 〈◊〉 sins past To preuent and auoide sin to come So the petitions of the Psalme are either for Iustification by pardon of sinnes committed to the 10. verse Sanctification by future holinesse in the rest But the 〈◊〉 doth not exactly pursue this method but rather the order of his own iudgement often iterating and varying his petition for one the same thing by the Metaphors of washing cleansing purging blotting out and doing away his sins and in the middest of his prayer for sanctification abruptly and passionately interlacing his sute for pardon of his crying crime of Murder O Miserable wretch that I am what shall I say What shall I doe Which way shall I turne To
whom shall I addresse my selfe Hell will not the earth cannot relieue me and I dare not lift vp mine eyes to Heauen hauing so highly offended against Heauen and before thee the great King of Heauen I am assailed on euery side assailed by mine own iniquities assailed by thy graces Where may I shrowd my selfe from my sinnes How can I hide mee from my selfe Where may I expect succour Whence may I hope for helpe sithence thy graces which I haue turned into wantonnesse doe conuince me of foule ingratitude doe multiply iniquities vpon me and euen arme thy mercies against me The extremity of my Condition is such as will afford no long time of deliberation In briefe there is one onely way left of escape and euasion and that is by flying from thee to fly to thee to appeale from thy seate of Iustice to thy throne of Mercy as to thy Court of last resort which is alwaies open Either that way or no way can I be rescued from vtter destruction The most odious sinne of desperation wil but plunge me further into the depth of damnation But with the Lord there is maruailous mercy and plenteous redemption By this meanes it is possible without it impossible to saue my sinfull soule Wherefore my resolution is in the lowest degree of humiliation in the deepest straine of contrition faithfully and yet in a sort fearefully to repose my selfe vpon his infinite and vnspeakeable compassion I will pierce mine entralles and pricke the heart of my corrupt heart to the quicke I will let out a flood of teares which are the bloud of my soule I will mingle my zealous and humble prayers with those salt and brackish teares I will knocke hard at his mercy gate and cry aloud Miserere A MEDITATION VPON THE PSALME of Mercy 1. Haue mercy vpon me O God according to thy great mercy and according to the multitude of thy tender compassions blot out my transgressions THAT which I begge at thy hands O God is mercy for of many properties in thee which are all essentiall to thee there is none so vsefull none so delightfull to my perplexed soule as is thy mercy Were it not for thy Mercy thy Maiesty would affright thy Wisedome confound thy Iustice condemne and thy Power destroy me as on the other part through the sweete mixture of thy Mercy thy Maiestie will reuiue thy Wisedome enlighten thy Iustice acquit thy Power preserue me and euery of thy other Attributes will contribute to the aduancement of my inestimable benefit and endlesse good In Mercy all my prayers and petitions are comprized by Mercy all my defects and desires are satisfied for Mercy all my prayses and thankes are returned Euery thing that hath being doth naturally affect continuance and well being Euery Man doth or should desire his chiefe good and true happinesse which consists in thy remission of his sinnes in his reconciliation to thee and that is the blessed and kindely fruite of thy gracious and tender mercy alone A sinner I am and who is not Therefore I cannot seeke for happines in freedome from sinne that is aboue the nature of man but in the free pardon of my sinne by grace which surmounts all the sinnes of all the world Thou didst looke downe O Lord from all eternity out of thy highest throne of Heauen by way of Suruey among the sonnes of men in all ages and generations all things and persons being euer present vnto thee to see if there were any that would vnderstand and seeke after thee But vpon exact enquiry returne was made they were all found corrupt and abominable There was not one that did good no not one Which for greater vehemency and euidence of the truth is repeated the second tyme and purposely recorded by an infinite foresight to take away all colour of doubt and to impose perpetuall Silence to such as afterwards might deceiue themselues and abuse others with an opinion of their owne iustice and holinesse as answerable to thy diuine law and meritorious of thy louing fauour Wherfore I present this lamentable supplication and sing this dolefull ditty though framed for my selfe 〈◊〉 yet fitting euery of the sonnes of Adam generally Haue Mercy vpon mee O God I call vpon thee O God at this time by the name of Elohim which purports the Trinity of Persons and not of Iehouah which denotes the Vnity of substance in the Godhead for my threefold sinne doth iustly occasion mee to fixe mine eyes vpon the Three persons distinctly Vpon thee O Father who art power against whom I haue offended by abuse of my regall Power in murdering Captaine Vriah and his whole troope Vpon thee O Sonne who art Wisedome by vsing finenesse and fraud in carrying closely and cunningly contriuing the murder Vpon thee O holy Ghost who art goodnesse whom I haue grieued by defiling my hands with blood and body with 〈◊〉 which is or should be thy temple and habitation When I implore thy great Mercie I imply my great misery The Phisick of the body must be attempered to the malady If the receipt be giuen vnder the due Dosis it may moue but it will not remoue the peccant humors Desperate diseases must haue soueraigne 〈◊〉 for meane medicines will neuer cure great griefes If the plaster bee too skant for the sore If the wound be not throughly teinted and wholy couered it will neuer bee well cured or soundly recouered As it is in the diseases and sores of he body so is it also in 〈◊〉 of the soule One deepe 〈◊〉 another the depth of sinne requires the depth of grace and a depth of misery calleth for a depth of mercy If I aske my selfe why is thy Mercy great for that there is no cause of thy mercy but thy Mercy I must answere by the effect Because thou canst 〈◊〉 my soule from the nethermost hell from such anguish of body from such perplexity of spirit from such terrors and torments as are ready to ouerwhelme mee in the pit of destruction If I aske how great is thy Mercy I must giue an answere answerelesse I know it to be meruailous great but how great it is I cannot comprehend The immensity of it I haue assayed to shadow out by such resemblances as the world affords to outward sence for the shallow conceits and weake capacities of mortall men being not able with my thoughts to reach much lesse with my tongue or penne to expresse it The height of thy mercy I 〈◊〉 to the altitude of the Heauen aboue the Earth the bredth to the distance of the East from the West the depth to the affection of parents to their children butalas these are no euen matches for that which is limited and finite hath no proportion at all with that which is vnlimited and infinite Thy Mercy O Lord is as thou art thou art great without quantity as thou art good without quality Thou art not merciful but mercy not good but goodnesse not louing but
Loue it selfe in the abstract The extent of thy goodnesse loue and mercy is such as hath no bounds the depth is such as hath no bottome The influence of it will make me feele that which no eloquence can vtter no intelligence can containe No man can tell how sweete hony is but hee that tasteth it I see O Lord great fruite of thy rich roote of Mercy For were not thy mercy exceeding great few or none could liue here the life of grace or there the life of glory Looke how many Saints there be in heauen or on earth by inchoation here in perfection there So many worthy examples so many infallible demonstrations there are of thine vnspeakeable mercy without which they should 〈◊〉 haue perished and sunke downe to Hell If therefore thy Iustice lift vp it selfe as the high Mountaines to eclipse the light of thy gracious countenance from mee I will raise my selfe yet higher in confidence of thy Truth which reacheth to the clouds and thy Mercy which mounts euen to the heauen of heauens I will frame this comfortable consequence to my distressed soule if thy mercy bee magnified aboue thy Iustice it must needs bee farre aboue my transgressions O Lord I haue caused my sinne to abound farre beyond the bankes and bounds of thy Law but it is thy property to pardon and the property of thy Mercy where sinne abounds there to superabound Thy mercy doth euen crosse and controule thy Iustice and as the highest Orbe doth by violence carry with it the inferior Spheres against their proper inclinations and motions So the force of thy powerfull mercy doth ouerrule my naturall and wilfull courses running to wickednesse and in that race hasting to iust condemnation My sinnes therefore how great soeuer cannot stop the flowing of thy vast Ocean of Mercy When I fall into computation and comparison of my sinnes on the one side and thy mercies on the other I finde by diuine Arithmetike and the true Iacobs-staffe to my singular comfort that my sinnes how great and how many soeuer yet may bee both measured and reckoned but on the other part that neither the magnitude nor the multitude of thy mercies can be either fathomed or numbred I beg thy great Mercy because thy lesser mercies will not doe the turne which my miserable condition requires For they may ease me of lesser miseries of afflictions in body of distresses in estate of other incumbrances in the world but it is thy larger Mercy that must forgiue not my lesser only but my greater sinnes which haue prouoked thy iust and heauy indignation against me Thy wayes O God are not as mans wayes nor thy mercies as mans mercies Mans mercy is short and scant mingled with hardnesse and maymed with sundry imperfections In ciuill matters some man will forgiue the interest but not the principall some man will forgiue the halfe but not the whole debt some man will forbeare to demand the debt yet will not forgoe the Bond hee will keepe that to curbe his debtor vpon all occasions In matters criminall one will forgiue the fault but not the punishment another will remit a part but not all the penalty a third will forgiue but not forget the iniury But thy Mercy O Lord is great large free and absolute intire and indefinite or rather infinite Thou forgiuest both the fault and punishment royally and really all is acquitted and discharged at once in accomplishment of that comfortable clause in the cloze of thy new Couenant Thou wilt remember our iniquities no more The multitude of my sinnes occasions me to parallel them with the multitude of thy mercies that there may bee a medicine for each malady a salue for euery sore I touch still vpon one and the same string though with some variety because the meditation and modulation of this mercy of thine is as sweet Musicke in mine eare and a ioyfull Iubile in my soule I striue to expresse one and the same thing in diuers words or phrases great mercy and a multitude of mercies being all one in sence and meaning for great mercy comprehends a multitude of mercies and a multitude of mercies amounts to one great masse of mercy The greatest mercy that the greatest person can doe to the most miserable wretch vpon earth is not to bee compared to the least of thy mercies which thou affoordest to the holiest man that liues in regard of the infinite disproportion that is betweene the Offendor and the Offended the Creator of Heauen and earth and dust and ashes Howbeit euen in thine infinite mercy as it hath relation to sinfull man there be degrees whereof we cannot better take the skantling then by our greater or lesser offences committed against thy diuine Maiesty for the Law of gratitude amongst men teacheth mee to acknowledge that thy loue is greater to them to whō thou forgiuest greater thē to such as thou acquitest of smaller debts Therefore as my more heynous sinnes at the Tribunall of thy iustice do call for seuerer punishment so at thy throne of mercy which is aboue thy seate of iustice and to which I appeale as to thy Court of last resort they begge and craue for thy more great and tender compassions Debt is a burthen and a great debt is an heauy burden hee that beares an honest minde cannot be quiet in minde so long as hee continues in debt My sins are my debts and that scoare runnes still in my minde whereon I haue runne so fast and so farre I professe truly that my sins haue gone ouer not my body only but my head also and that they are a burden too heauy for mee to beare I know O Lord thou keeper of men that thou markest what is amisse in me thou scorest vp my sinnes my wilde and wandring thoughts my vaine and wicked words my foule and filthy actions thou keepest a day and a debt-booke of them to charge mee by way of account whensoeuer it pleaseth thee thou settest them downe in capitall and red letters to declare thine anger thou grauest them with the poynt of a Diamond and writest them with a pen of Iron both in thy Registry of Heauen and in the Tablet of mine own conscience on earth placing on the right side thereof the straight rules of thy Law and mine Obliquities on the left each as a foile to set forth the other Debts must either be paid or forgiuen else they cannot be discharged Pay O Lord I cannot I am become bankrupt I am not able no not by way of composition to answer thee one for a thousand Therefore it remaines onely that I beseech thee whose propertie it is to haue mercy and forgiue to crosse this debt-booke to wipe out the score to cancell the hand-writing and deface the record that is against me to put away and blot out my transgressions that there may remaine no memory of them either to prouoke thy heauy vengeance or to affright my
distressed soule Wash mee wash mee againe and againe or wash me throughly from mine iniquity and cleanse mee from my sinne As my sinnes being in nature of debts are registred in thy book and set vpon thy score so like spots and staynes they blemish and deface the Image of thy diuine nature ingrauen in my soule at the Creation of it in such sort as thou canst hardly discerne it to be thy workemanship and therefore I intreate thee to wash me often and throughly that I may appeare cleane and holy in thy pure and piercing eyes There is nothing so pure O Lord as thou art in thy diuine nature nothing so foule as I am by naturall and actuall corruption Wherefore I thinke nothing too much to bring the most defiled thing on earth to the 〈◊〉 Essence in heauen and that makes me to beg againe and againe that thou wilt wash me againe and againe Sinne is filthy to thinke of more filthy to speake and heare of most filthy to act and commit there is nothing in it or any part or passage of it but vilenesse basenesse and filthinesse All the washings in thy Leuiticall Law were types and figures of this Spirituall washing in the blood of the Lambe slaine from the beginning of the world Wash me O Lord with the water of thy grace with that water whereof whoso drinketh shall neuer thirst wash mee with the water of mine owne teares with the water of thy Word with the water of thy Sacraments I know O Lord that vnlesse thou wash mee I can haue no part or portion in the. e Wherefore I beseech thee to wash not my feete onely but my head also and all the parts and members of my body yea to rince and scowre my soule and all the powers and faculties thereof that I may present both soule and body an holy and acceptable sacrifice vnto thee It is thy blessed busines O Christ to 〈◊〉 me in this worlde that thou maist render me spotlesse to thy Father in another world I sinne daily and therefore had neede of daily washing I sinne continually and therfore had 〈◊〉 of continuall washing for the word including a multiplication of washing doth imply a multiplication of sinning For if my soule lothing the filth and mire wherewith shee hath soiled her selfe euen to vglinesse take a course by the teares of contrition for the cleane washing of her face how soone doth the old dirt of sinne spurt into her visage againe So that the businesse of the soule in this life if it be a life of repentance is neuer at an end being indeed nothing else but the washing of that which is foule and the fouling of that which was washed There be as it is reported in the story of nature certain flying fishes whose wings by flying waxe dry and being dry lose their flying so as they must euer and anon returne to the Sea by the moisture thereof to enable their flight againe Euen so my soule washed in the lauer of regeneration and mounting vp towards heauen through this wicked world her wings euen her best purposes cogitations and conceptions easily grow dry by the contagion of earthly conuersation vnlesse they bee often bathed and moistened in the waters of repentance to carry her thorow to her iournies end So then my case and condition is such as in regard of many sports howerly falling and deepely staining my ill fauoured and disfigured Soule 〈◊〉 haue iust cause to pray earnestly that I may bee both often and throughly washed and by thee who canst alone make me cleane and clense me from my sinnes As I haue a great debt to be discharged much filthinesse to bee washed so haue I a loathsome Leprosie of sinne to be clensed wherefore I pray thee O Lord to clense mee from from my sinnes This Leprosie and the cure of it were shadowed out and figured also by sundry purgations clensings in thy Leuiticall law all poynting to that blood of the Lambe whereby my sinnes are purged The Leprosie as Physiicans tell vs is an hereditary disease descending from the Father to the Child An ignominious and odious disease banishing the Leper from all company a contagious disease spreading from man to man 〈◊〉 then the Plague a dull and stupid disease that makes him insensible altogether and a dangerous or rather desperate disease 〈◊〉 or not at all to be cured In all which 〈◊〉 sinne may fitly bee resembled to a 〈◊〉 for sinne comes by propagation from our first Parents to all their posterity It separates vs from thy presence from the company of thy 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 of Angels and all good men It infecteth others and poyloneth not onely with the breath but with the sight of it too It benums vs so as wee feele not thy fearefull iudgements It is vtterly incurable otherwise then by the blood of the Lambe It hath been obserued that the teares of a Vine when it bleedes are a very good medicine for curing of the bodily Leprosie 〈◊〉 so the teares of the heart 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 and lies lowe as doth 〈◊〉 Vine that 〈◊〉 and mournes in humility for sinne auaile much to 〈◊〉 clensing of this Leprosie of the soule My sinne as a Leprosie doth ouerspread both my soule and body from the crowne of the head to the sole of the foote from the highest faculty of my vnderstanding to the lowest affection of my will there is no sound part in mee my disease is growne to the height to full ripenesse or rather foule rottennesse it hath put out the scabbe as they say by enormious and scandalous actions Wherefore I beseech thee who art the prime and soueraigne Physician to looke vpon me with the eye of pitty and to clense and cure mee of my Leprous sinne and sinfull Leprosie 2. I know mine owne wickednesse and my sinne is euer before me or my sinne is euer against me BEfore the Prophet Nathan was sent as a speciall Bailife to summon me by a writ ad meliùs inquirendum I cast mine eye carelesly I did not fixe it fully I looked slightly and superficially as in passage not sadly and mournefully vpon my grieuous sins I did not behold them so seriously as I ought to haue done I saw but the Epitome or grosse summe of them I did not viewe them in the large volume written at length or rathere painted out as now they are in their true shapes and colours Euery man by the light of nature must needs see somewhat of this kinde in the glasse of his owne conscience but through the corruption of nature no man is willing to take a perfect suruay and make a full portraiture of his own transgressions There is in man an affected ignorance and blindnesse in this behalfe and who so blinde as he that will not see who so ignorant as hee that will not know As wee put off the euill day so long as we can so we put by the euill obiect so farre as wee may
houses that at their comming in and going out they might bee euer mindfull of their iourney and passage to death If those Heathen by the light of nature tooke so wise a course how much more ought Christians by the lampe of grace still behold their sins as their Graues wherein their soules must lye eternally buried vnlesse they bee timely raised and thorowly renewed by repentance As the sight of the Brazen Serpent did cure the sting of the serpents so the 〈◊〉 and displeasing sight of my sins doth take away the biting of these serpents So then in the middest of the discontent which I finde in this fearefull and wofull sight of my grieuous sins there is this singular comfort that thou in mercy turnest thy face from them thou castest them behinde thee while I set them before mee They doe not deepely displease thee and me at one and the same time when they procure my sorrow and humiliatiō they cease to prouoke thine anger and indignation My sins neuer 〈◊〉 mee but when they delight mee they neuer displease thee but whē they please me Wherefore as fóule as the obiect as odious as the 〈◊〉 is in my better iudgement I am contented with an impatient patience still to represent it to my soule because howsoeuer in it selfe vgly it vshers me by degrees to the view and contemplation of thy vndeserued loue and fauor which at length as the bright sun dispels all the cloudes of care and mists of Melancholy and raises my deiected heart to the participation of vnspeakable consolation Wretched and vnhappy I was in committing so great and grieuous sinnes but I am happy in a sort in this vnhappinesse if I haue eyes to see my sins being committed to see them as it were thorow a perspectiue glasse so as they may seeme in ful proportion as great to mee as they are in deed Satan deales with his vassales as the Rauen doth with the Lambe the Rauen first picks out the silly creature his eyes and then carries him out of the way securely to deuoure him First Satan blindes me in sinne and then hee bindes me in the chaines of darknesse as fast as hee can of purpose to throw me into vtter darkenesse When after shippewracke I see the Rocke which I could not foresee before I fell vpon it I striue by all meanes to auoyde it the second time When I see my sinnes past in the true lineaments of their vgly shape I cannot but bee shie and wary to shun the like monsters euer after When the bayted hook of sinne is cast before me I see the baite of pleasure only but not the hooke of thy iudgements but after I haue beene catched and felt and seene the bare hooke without a bayte I become circumspect and suspect euery bit I swallow for feare lest I be ensnared againe My sinne is euer against me ranged as it were and marshalled in battaile aray against me My sinne doth proudly affront and directly oppose mee nay it doth euen outface mee shamelesly Before Nathan came vnto me I had cast my sinnes behinde my backe his message hath caused mee to transpose them for now they are set before my face they stand stoutly against me euen to my face My sinne O Lord as it is a witnesse so is it an informer against my conscience it charges and conuicts me before thy iudgement seate I haue no hope of preuarication I see no way of euasion It makes hue and crie against mee with eager pursuite it will not giue ouer till I be apprehended and deliueted into the hands of iustice When there is no man to vexe mee outwardly I torment my selfe inwardly as holy Iob confessed in those words Why hast thou set me ouer against thee I am become burden some euen to my selfe Thou diddest set his sinnes against him which made him conceiue that thou diddest set him against thee as a marke to shoote thine arrowes of anger at but when 〈◊〉 began thorowly to feele thou diddest begin graciously to ease him of his burden My sinne as it opposes against mee so it interposes betweene thee and me in such sort as neither my prayers can ascend to thee nor thy graces descend to mee vnlesse thy mercy interuene to keepe the peace and cleere the passage betweene vs. Against thee thee only haue I 〈◊〉 Now my inclosed sorrow must haue vent my oppressed conscience must be disburthened This knowledge and representation breeds an acknowledgement and recognition of my sin The contrition of my heart forceth from me a confession of my mouth I can hold no longer but must needs with teares in mine eyes and anguish in my soule crie out Peccaui and with an ingemination by way of aggrauation Against thee against thee onely to declare my iust indignation against my selfe for committing so foule and grieuous faults against that great Maiestie and that gracious goodnesse which I haue so highly offended And thus doe I limit and as it were appropriate my offences as committed against thee alone for many causes For although I haue sinned against Heauen and against Earth yet is there no witnesse of my sinne on earth but thou O God in Heauen so closely and cunningly haue I carried it That I defiled the wife to conceale that destroyed the life of Vriah was not knowne to the world that I so treacherously and cruelly exposed to slaughter a great troope of Souldiers fighting for mee and vnder my command to couer my wicked designe against Vriah was hidden from the eyes of men Thou knowest and seest all things wherefore against thee onely haue I sinned Againe though there bee no man that dare reprooue mee that will accuse me that cā punish me being a King and aboue the Law yet euery King and kingdome vpon earth is subiect to thee the King of Kings and thy soueraignety I must render thee an account of my demeanour which I tremble and quake to thinke of Moreouer although I haue not onely sinned against thee in Heauen but scandalized men on earth also yet it vexeth mee beyond all comparison that I haue wittingly and presumptuously offended thee Although all the world should 〈◊〉 emee yet it is too too much to me to finde and feele thee my Iudge that mine own conscience doth summon mee before thy Tribunall and frame my proces against me before thy Iudgement seate In this case no flattery of my seruants who according to the fashion of Court doe sooth and claw their Masters can lessen my paine asswage mine anguish or pacifie my conscience Say what they will or can I must say still Against thee against thee only I haue offended Furthermore none but thou that art iust and without sinne hast of right the cognizance of sinne and coertion of offenders Sinners are not competent Iudges of sinners Men doe murmur and grudge to giue account of their sinfull actions to sinfull men who are tainted with the same or greater vices but
bee without this heate he that hath that Sun cannot be without this light When my great and enormous sinnes had plunged me into the sea of misery finding no other meane of helpe in that fearefull danger I catched vp and tooke hold of the planke or boordof Repentance to saue me from drowning Repentance hath two faces and so looketh two wayes backward and forward to sinnes past and holinesse to come I haue grieuously lamented my offences formerly done and importunately begged pardon for them accounting this remission because thou art pleased O God so to esteeme it my iustification I now earnestly craue a cleane heart and a new spirit that being clensed I may keep my selfe cleane that being renewed I may entertaine newnesse of life for my sanctification For if I fall againe vpon the same rock of presumption which caused my shipwracke before it will plainely appeare that I haue not really acted but formally counterfeited repentance in which case I must pronounce an heauie doome against my selfe for dissembled holinesse is double wickednesse wickednesse masking vnder the sinfull vayle and vizard of hypocrisie Repentance neuer attaines her Crowne and Garland till shee haue brought forth amendment of life after lamentation for sin to make some kind of reparation That which thou requirest of me O God is my heart and how can I deny thee one thing that hast giuen me all things for what haue I that I haue not receiued of thee Well then I resolue as it is meet to giue thee my heart But when I looke into my heart by the helpe of thy suruey for it is thou that declarest vnto man what and how ill his heart is I finde it so foule and full of corruption as I am ashamed to present it vnto thee in that plight Nay I tremble to thinke that thy Pure and Radiant Eyes should behold such a puddle and sincke of sinne as lurketh in my heart For alas euery imagination of the thoughts of my heart is onely euill continually Were my heart such as it should be I would cheerefully giue thee my heart O Lord therefore create in mee a cleane heart Thou madest my heart first in Adam hee marred it and I in him by disobedience from him to all his posterity the contagion of this pollution is spred and propagated wherefore create my heart againe create it a cleane heart either a cleane heart or no heart at all I affect purity of heart by thy grace for indeed I cannot so much as affect much lesse effect it without thee Vnlesse thou take the worke in hand it will be vndone My heart that is originally and totally vncleane by naturall generation and daily soiled by actuall transgression cannot become cleane and neate without spirituall washing and supernaturall regeneration and that is thy proper operation Seeke not to new make mould my defiled hart out of the forebeing matter thereof That may seeme a strange enterprize and fruitlesse worke But thou O God who by thy power madest the world of nothing by thy powerfull grace Create which is thy peculiar attribute a cleane heart within me To create is not to make a thing out of the power of any subiect or matter formerly being But to create is to make a thing of nothing and that is an act of diuine power that is a case excepted and a prerogatiue reserued to thee alone The production of grace in a gracelesse heart is a wonderfull and gracious creation Create in mee powerfully and of nothing without any 〈◊〉 matter create in me 〈◊〉 and for nothing without any precedent merit of mine a pure heart so 〈◊〉 thou crowne in mee not my deserts but thine 〈◊〉 gifts if ought proceed from my heart to my tongue or hand not displeasing vnto thee Worke this worke thy selfe and take the praise of it to thy selfe alone O God Not vnto mee not vnto me I doe iterate and ingeminate my disclaymer but vnto thy Name giue all the glory It is another manner of power to make the quality then the substance of the heart yea it is a harder taske to make a heart cleane that hath beene soiled with the filth and tainted with the putrifaction of sin then to make a pure and innocent heart at the first The more shall be my thankfulnesse if thou O Lord vouchsafe me so great a fauour I will not curiously enquire into the meanes or manner of atchieuing this worke Let me henceforth really finde by the imaginations and inclinations of it that it is a cleane heart conformed as it may be in the frailty of 〈◊〉 flesh 〈◊〉 thy holy 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 all is well As a woman 〈◊〉 by the stirring of the 〈◊〉 in her wombe that 〈◊〉 hath conceiued so 〈◊〉 me feele by the effectuall motions of thy good 〈◊〉 that I am begotten anew vnto a liuely 〈◊〉 by the resurrection of Christ according to his abundant mercy The summe of all is Giue me O Lord what thou enioynest and then enioyne mee what thou pleasest I am of no ability to do what thou commandest and therefore am enforced to beseech thee thy selfe to do in me what thou requirest to bee done of me Create a cleane heart in me If my heart as the spring and conduit head be pure and cleane the waters that flow thence though conueighed in earthen pipes will be cleare still my secret thoughts my open words my visible workes though they sauour somewhat of earth and flesh will not be altogether vncleane and vnsauoury A man must bee twice borne ere he can enter into the kingdome of heauen As he is made to the similitude of the first Adam so must he be made to the similitude of the second Adam and the regeneration is a more excellent worke then the generation the re-creation then the creation In the first man was wrought out of clay in the other God workes grace out of sinne In the former he breathed a soule into the dead body here he breatheth his holy Spirit into a dead heart In the creation he made man perfect in all his members In this re-creation not only all the members of the body but the faculties of the soule also must be framed anew It is a greater matter to raise a man dead in sinne then to raise a rotten carkasse out of the graue In the one birth and the other the heart is the first 〈◊〉 that is enlyued my 〈◊〉 must first take fire 〈◊〉 can I neuer bee 〈◊〉 with the true zeale of 〈◊〉 glory and mine owne saluation In the first creation this 〈◊〉 Chaos and darke 〈◊〉 was couered by thy 〈◊〉 without any contradiction or resistance Thou spakest but the word and all was readily done and perfectly framed But in my re-creation my flesh or my spirit or my fleshly spirit doth oppose and incounter thy holy Spirit grieueth and maketh it sad laboureth to quench it euen then when it striueth to reuiue repaire and reforme me This is notoriously verified
grieuous and irkesome will the damage and disgrace be to euery or any of these respectiuely Thou O God art our Master and to serue thee is to raigne with thee Thou art our Father and what greater preeminence then to bee the Sonne of God Thou art our King and to be in subiection to thee is our chiefest dominion How then doth it concerne me being an vnfaithfull Seruant a prodigall Childe and a trayterous Subiect to beg earnestly of thee my bountifull Master my louing Father my gracious Soueraigne that thou wilt not take away thy 〈◊〉 banish me from thy fight nor expell mee from thy Courts As the soule doth excell the body and the 〈◊〉 the flesh beyond proportion so the one losse is incomparably greater then the other Thou O God art present with me by thy good Spirit and so long as I haue this Ghest in my soule I haue the fruition of thee and thy presence wherefore suffer not this noble Ghest to be dislodged and taken from mee Thou and thy Spirit are vndeuided companions If thou cast me from thy presence thou takest thy holy Spirit from me and if thou takest 〈◊〉 Spirit thou takest thy selfe from me I doe yet enioy thy presence in a sort I behold thy countenance though full of anger I feele thy Spirit within mee though sad and grieued for I find contrition in my heart confession in my mouth and confusion in my face for my grieuous offences I hate my sinnes and my selfe for my sinnes This smoake cannot ascend but from that fire of thy Spirit this fruit cannot grow but from that roote of repentance Howbeit when I behold the vglinesse of my offences with an vnpartiall eye and consider how hard harsh a thing it is for Purity and Holinesse to dwell or abide with wickednesse and filthinesse I tremble and quake in an awefull feare that thou wilt as iustly thou mayest depriue me of thy gracious presence and bereaue mee of thy blessed Spirit Lord thou art in all things by thine Essence thou art in all places and at once by thy Power and presence I may well bee asked Whither wilt thou flye from his Spirit or whither wilt thou goe from his presence c If thou shalt say The darkenesse shall couer me euen the night shall bee light about thee Yet thou canst and wilt cast me from thy presence and withdraw thy holy Spirit from me if I be settled vpon the dregs of my sinnes without remorse in contempt of thy Maiestie and abuse of thy mercie If thou in thy iust iudgement and wrathfull indignation abandon mee from thy presence thou castest me out of thy prouidence and protection thy blessed Spirit doth quite desert mee I am banished out of the land of the liuing into the Desert of desolation which is without the compasse of the whole Vniuerse that thou didst create and d'st vphold In that case happy were I to bee no more but I shall be most vnhappy to bee and continue helpelesse and hopelesse in endlesse misery Thy holy Spirit is by a speciall title stiled The Comforter by excellencie because all other comforters and comforts are cold and vncomfortable without and beside it I haue I confesse with griefe many times checked this Spirit when it hath presented good motions to my minde and good desires to my hart I haue grieued it exceedingly while I carelesly neglected and stubbornely refused the good counsell it ministred vnto me Howbeit sithence without this Comforter I must bee for euer comfortlesse in the depth of discomfort I 〈◊〉 thee not to take vtterly and finally thy holy Spirit from me Thy gifts O Lord are without repentance therefore I trust I shal neuer be without repentance whō thou louest once thou doest euer loue if thou begin thou wilt perseuere to loue Although I doe not alwayes feele the graces of thy Spirit in my sinfull soule yet I shall 〈◊〉 trust haue 〈◊〉 euer because once I had them My sinne may take away the sence and 〈◊〉 for a while but not the interest and property if I may so say which I haue in thy blessed Spirit Which notwithstanding the fruition of this Spirit being so precious and the losse of it so inualuable I cannot but in feare and anxiety of soule instantly pray that it may not be taken from me Although the seed of thy Word whereby I am begotten againe to a liuely Hope be immortall and incorruptible yet it is so choked with the weeds of fleshly desires so intangled with worldly allurements it lyeth so buried in the furrowes of my hard and stony heart as I may much doubt and in a manner distrust the shooting and springing of it vp againe without an extraordinary influence of thy heauenly grace which cannot descend vpon me vnlesse my humble and earnest prayers ascend vp to thee Wherefore retaine mee O Lord in thy fauour and permit thy blessed Spirit not onely to soiourne for a season but to remaine continually with me Let me so keepe a doore in the Sanctuary of my soule which is one of thy Courts as I may neuer suffer this Ghest to goe out of it 12 Restore vnto mee the ioy of thy saluation and vphold mee with thy firme Spirit or stablish mee with thy free Spirit I Doe not say Giue mee what I neuer had but restore vnto mee what I had and haue lost by mine owne fault and folly It is a greater fauour to restore then to giue in as much as it is a greater vnhappinesse to lose a Iewell which I had then neuer to haue had it Priuation is a greater punishment then want It is the height of misery to haue beene happy To come out of darknesse into light out of sicknesse into health out of perplexity into security out of sorrow sadnesse into ioy and gladnesse and so by the contrary to come out of cheerfulnesse into pensiuenesse sets out more liuely and causes to be felt more sensibly both the one and the other condition One contrary is a foyle vnto another We then make the tru est valuation of thy greatest mercies O Lord when we are for a time depriued of them which is one speciall cause why thou takest them from vs that by the want we may learne the worth of them and shew our selues accordingly thankefull because thou diddest vouchsafe vs the fruition of them so long and much more ioyfully imbrace and charily preserue them when thou pleasest to restore them to vs againe For as the eyes cannot discerne a goodly obiect when it is held close vnto them but when it is remoued in some distance so our vntoward vnthankfull hearts cannot iudge of the excellency and sweetnesse of present graces but when they are withdrawne a while from vs then doe we more cheerefully behold and fully obserue the riches of thy bounty mercy in them This ioy of thy saluation consisteth in an assured
hope and hopefull assurance of eternall happinesse This hope is the heart of my soule and the very life of my life It putteth spirit into my decayed spirit and vigor into my dead heart for a hopelesse is a heartlesse life and were it not for this hope amidst the inward and outward crosses of this life my very heart would breake All the ioyes vpon earth cannot make me cheerfull vntill I bee seized of this ioy nor can all the crosses and calamities which the world affoords dishearten me while I finde and feele this ioy of thy saluation What greater ioy to an afflicted soule lying 〈◊〉 oppressed vnder the heauy apprehension of thy wrathfull indignation and for a long and tedious time suffering euen hell out of hell then to receiue a gracious pardon of all his sinne freely granted vnto him by thee through the mediation of thy Christ sealed by thy blessed Spirit and deliuered to his spirit into the hand of faith Wherefore turne O Lord my mourning into dancing loose my sackcloth and gird mee with gladnesse O Lord let me shout out songs of deliuerance from the captiuity and thraldome of sinne and Satan I haue wilfully put my selfe out of possession of this ioy which I so happily enioyed O Lord restore it vnto me againe by a new order iniunction out of thy Court of equity and mercie let mee returne into it by Remitter hold it as in my former ancient right I haue iust cause to stile it Thy saluation For I am the patient onely thou O God the onely agent thou hast not the greatest share but all the interest in this affaire Thou art the sole not only Author but also actor in it For the purchase thereof I neede thy first grace of Initiation and thy second of Confirmation thy preuenient and thy subsequent grace thy accompanying and thy perseuering grace All is thy grace and thou art all in all and therefore to thee alone I ascribe all the honour and glory It is meerely and intirely thy saluation Christ his righteousnesse imputed and imparted to me is the true roote ioy and peace are the happy fruite and faith is the rooting of it in my soule Though there come a winter of affliction to restraine the sap and hinder the shewe yet the Summer of cheerefulnesse will make all to flourish againe in perfect lustre But how can I expect the serenity and Sunshine of this ioy in the valley of teares Why should I desire this garment of gladnesse when my heart ought cōtinually to weare the sables of sadnesse and the mourning weede of repentance for my daily or rather howrely sinnes how can there be any time or place left for ioy when there is almost a 〈◊〉 of sorrow enioyned He that will reconcile himselfe to thee O God may easily reconcile these different passions make them dwell together in his soule with amity and vnity Else thou that hast required mee oft-times to mourne wouldest neuer haue commanded mee to reioyce alwaies The faithfull man hath a sorrow mingled with ioy and a ioy mingled with sorrow There is a griefe in ioy as there is a ioy in griefe nay which may yet seeme more strange the greater griefe sometimes the greater ioy and the greater ioy the greater griefe for one and the same man at one and the same time may bee exceeding sorry for his sin and excceding ioyous with the apprehension of thy mercy in the free forgiuenesse of his sinne The greater griefe hee conceiueth for his sinne the more comfort he may iustly take euen in that regard And the greater ioy hee feeleth in the hopefull assurance of thy fauour the greater sorrow must hee needs conceiue for his sinne that bred thy displeasure for the more assurance hee hath of thy loue towards him the more hee will loue thee Loue is the loadstone 〈◊〉 loue and will draw loue euen from an yron heart and the more hee loueth thee the more his soule must melt into teares when he recounts considers how by his wicked and rebellious courses he hath demeaned himselfe wretchedly and vnworthily towards that God whom he findeth so graciously and pittifully affected towards him Sorrow may bee sometimes vnseasonable but this spirituall ioy as wee say of some kinde of meates is neuer out of season The precept of reioycing though conceiued in the affirmatiue doth alwaies binde at all times Reioyce in all things and euermore reioyce The grace I beg is the complement crowne and garland of all the graces I haue formerly craued For although I be washed neuer so cleane from my former staynes though my hart be neuer so throughly purged from old corruptions my spirit neuer so well renewed and rectified for the time to come yea though I obtaine a full restauration of the ioy of thy saluation which I had and haue lost yet vnlesse thou bee pleased to confirme and stablish me with thy firme and free 〈◊〉 none of those blessings apart nor all of them 〈◊〉 together can much auaile me For without this 〈◊〉 and establishment I 〈◊〉 neuer be able to 〈◊〉 and perseuere in true Piety of Religion in sincere probity of 〈◊〉 Well I may like a bankrupt Marchant supplied by friends or credit set vp my trade of godlinesse awhile but I shall soone be enforced to shut vp shop againe Well I may beginne to runne the race of godlinesse but I shall neuer get the goale well I may enter the lists afresh with my old and deadly enemy the Deuill and his two valiant Champions the World and the Flesh but I shall quickly be foyled I shall neuer 〈◊〉 the victory fully and finally Wherefore do not onely raise mee that am falne but vphold me when I am raised sustaine mee continually with thy firme Spirit that I may not onely begin well and proceed cheerefully but also perseuere constantly and end happily I did endeauour when time was in some sort to serue and please thee I frequented publike assemblies in thy holy Tabernacle I sent vp sundry Prayers from my priuate Oratory and the secret closer of my heart vnto thy Maiestie I laboured to gouerne my people with Iustice and equity to punish wilfull offenders seuerely to reward well-deseruers cheerefully to deliuer the oppressed to relieue the needy but this notwithstanding how soone alas was I taken with the sight of Bathsheba and through my frailty carried captiue into Adultery to satisfie my 〈◊〉 and into Murther to conceale my Adultery Wherefore settle confirme and establish me O Lord. I haue directed generally All you that trust in the Lord be strong and hee shall establish your heart he keepeth the faithfull and vpholdeth the iust by him alone the steps of men are established that is firmely directed and perfected My spirit which must bee wrought vpon by thy Spirit through the contagion of my flesh and the carnality of it is become almost wholly carnall and by that meanes weake and fraile soone weary of well doing it
thē I can performe I haue assumed and presumed to doe that 〈◊〉 is out of my power vnlesse thou O Lord bee pleased by thy gracious fauour to enable me for accomplishment thereof It is gracefull to me to shew my sefe gratefull to thee yea it is iust that for the singular benefit of thy Iustice in performing promised and vndeserued mercies I 〈◊〉 render all possible thanks and returne all manner of prayses vnto thee but this I am not able to make good without thy goodnesse As I could not repent nor beleeue so neither can I yeeld thankes or prayses but by thy gifts grace alone I am blinde and cannot see deafe cannot heare dumbe and cannot speake thy wonders thy words thy praises vnlesse thou open mine eyes eares and lips It is thou alone that must speake in mee that must worke in mee both to will and to do nay thou must do in me and for me what thou requirest to be done by me else it will be vnsaid and vndone thou must be all in all to 〈◊〉 else all will be nothing Who is hee among the sonnes of Adam that cannot sing and say any thing that is euill by his owne power and will by Satans instigation howbeit not without God his permission that cannot speak vaine and wicked words that cannot sing wanton and ribald songs scandalous and scurrilous libels that cannot blaspheme thee slander his neighbours that cannot flatter his superiours basely lye to his equals cunningly reproach his inferiours scornefully that cannot say and vnsay sweare and forsweare and what not But it is a good thing to sing prayses to thee That he cannot do nor say ought else that is good vnlesse thou put the thoghts into his heart and the words into his mouth Wherefore open thou my lips O Lord circumcise them vnty the strings of my tongue and 〈◊〉 not before my mouth shall shew forth thy prayse My lips shall speake thy praise when thou hast taught me thy statutes It is possible for a man that is stirred vp and preuented by thy grace to thinke and conceiue well what is to be said but to vtter deliuer that well is a further blessing and requires a new supply and helpe of grace for guiding and gouerning the tongue in that behalfe Nay there is yet a further and subsequent grace required to take a fit occasion and opportunity seasonably to vtter what is well conceiued and digested both in regard of the speaker and hearers that all interuenient impediments may bee remoued and taken away And in our case this is the more requisite because our prayers and prayses commonly goe together as is meete so as at one and the same time we are both to encounter Satan who is then most busie to distract and disturbe vs and God himselfe to whome by the feruent importunity of our prayers we must offer a kinde of violence as Iacob did when he was said to haue wrastled with thee Wherefore there is required a long Chayne fastened by many seuerall linckes of grace to binde together this blessed worke of setting forth thy iust and due prayses My mouth shall shew forth thy praise not onely in Psalmes and Hymnes with all manner of Iubilation but in the instruction admonition and correction of wicked and impious ones and the reduction of them to thy law and lore Nay I will play the Aduocate open my mouth for widdowes orphanes and other miserable creatures such as are tongue-tyed and cannot as are ouer-awed and dare not speake for themselues I will in earnest and effectuall manner recommend the care and protection of them also to all my subordinate Magistrates and Ministers He that speakes for such Clients may bee said to be thine owne mouth because thou 〈◊〉 the Patrone of all those that are oppressed for want of assistance and defence and men vndertake their causes by thy speciall assignement and deputation which redounds to thy prayse and glory in an extraordinary manner True it is that the thankfulnesse of the heart is the heart of thankefulnesse there is the well-spring The heart as a King commands this duty to bee done the tongue like an Herald sounds the Trumpet As the heart is the hart the tongue the trumpet so the life is the life of thankfulnes it must be acted indeede as well as proclaimed with the mouth Then will the tune be perfect when there is a true consort betweene the heart and the tongue and the deede The thankes and prayses must bee cordiall vocall and reall all together I doe sometimes in contemplation and admiration of thy wonderfull blessings bountiful fauours wherewith thou hast laden my soule as it were breake out into this exclamation and interrogation Quid retribuam What shall I render to thee Lord for all thy mercies In an amazed astonishment when I can giue my selfe no satisfactory answere knowing that all I can doe is lesse then nothing in comparison of what thou hast done to me or I should and would doe to thee yet thinking that I finde as it were something I resolue to make some shew of returne at least and to take the Cup of saluation or of health and call vpon the name of 〈◊〉 according to the custome of our Church and people who for benefits receiued vse to offer peace or thanke-offerings whereof they eate and reioyce before the Lord and at their banquets take vp the Cup of wine in their hands and blesse God called thereupon The Cup of Blessing When I seeke seriously what I might render vnto thee I finde nothing but what is thine already and therfore I must desire thee to giue mee to giue thee when all is done I must giue thee of thine own els I can giue thee nothing For who hath preuented thee or beene aforehand with thee Who hath giuen thee first Wherefore when the question is pursued and pressed yet further who hath giuen me this Cup of saluation I must ingeniously confesse that euen thou hast furnished mee with this kinde of retribution I cannot make this good without thy goodnesse I cannot praise thee vnlesse 〈◊〉 open my lips with the key of thy grace and tune my tongue and voyce to sing Praise thou the Lord c. O my soule I haue nothing of mine own to giue but my sin and that may not be presented vnto thee My sin is mine indeed and not thine I haue the full interest and ownership therof Whatsoeuer I haue else is thine and not mine thou art the sole Author and proprietary thereof Mine is only the fruition and vse by thy permission and as a Tenant at will I am but instrumentum animatum a meere instrument liuing by thy breath Thou must open my lips else my mouth cannot vtter thy praises The very sound and voyce in me is thine I am but the Eccho to resound and returne it againe As the Riuers flow from the the sea and reflow backe into it
a greater cannot be bestowed vpon the soule of man whiles it is confined within this valley of teares inclosed within this bodie of death And because through the frailty of my flesh and the fraud of Satan I am so prone to recidiuation and backe shding so ready to fall away from thee euen 〈◊〉 many Apostasies pardoned vnlesse I be still vpheld and supported giue me thy free spirit that 〈◊〉 may cheerefully thy firme spirit that I may constantly accomplish thy blessed will and 〈◊〉 in 〈◊〉 good duties that 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 vnto me And for that thankefulnesse is the best returne for benefits receiued and the strongest meanes to purchase new fauours giue mee grace as to promise so to performe gratitude euery way and euermore highly to esteeme and zealously to affect the reducing reclaiming and conuerting of sinners and impious persons those that erre in their religion or conuersation or both as the most acceptable seruice that can be done vnto thee vpon earth Teach me to vse all earnest compellation and powerfull insinuation to winne thy fauour againe when I haue forfeited it by committing some grieuous sin especially quicken mee by faith to make a particular application and appropriation as it were of thy saluation to mine owne soule which pious presumption and holy ambition thou art well pleased withall Giue me grace with the deepest straine of my hart and the loudest tone and tune of my voyce to magnifie thy marueilous goodnesse Though I be lesse then the least of thy mercies yet teach me in duty and discretion for more bountifull fauours to returne more plentifull praises If I be deliuered from a crying sinne I ought of congruence to sing aloud of thy iustice which giuing assurance of thy mercy by performance of thy couenant of grace cannot but produce an exultation of the heart and an exaltation of the voyce and tongue in the celebration of thy iust praises But alas how can I make that poore returne for thy rich mercies which mee thinkes I ought to vowe and promise When all is done I must therein also craue thy blessed assistance that thou wilt be pleased to open my lips and to vntie my tongue strings I must owe thee for that grace also and goe on thy score euen for those praises which onely by Eccho I resound vnto 〈◊〉 Blessed be thy name O Lord who in my deepest distresse and heauiest condition for my sinnes when I seeke for ease and reliefe tellest mee the meanes whereby thine anger may be appeased and thy fauour redeemed Thou requirest no sacrifice that with labour and charge should bee purchased abroad but such as is or should be at home and within me thou expectest no other satisfaction from me but the humiliation of my proud heart and the sorrow of my rebellious soule O wonderfull goodnesse O vnspeakeable mercie What more fauourable termes can be deuised or propounded then that thou wilt accept my submission and reconciliation so as I will aske thee forgiuenesse humbly and freely professe and expresse effectually mine hearty repentance for the manifold sinnes I haue committed against thy divine Maiestie Out of the the apprehension of this louing kindnesse and tender compassion if there were nothing else I ought to melt into teares of griefe breake my heard hart bruize my obstinate spirit which haue transported me so farre and plunged me so deepe into thy displeasure O Lord inable mee whom thou hast ordained a Priest for this purpose to offer daily and duly this acceptable sacrifice vnto thee which I should the more willingly present because it no way intends the destruction of my body but the correctiō of my soule I am only to slay my sensuality to quell my vnruly affections and subdue them to thy holy will for mine own good not to impech nature but to increase grace and for my better incouragemēt to this mortification thou art graciously pleased to vse this protestation that If I iudge my selfe thou wilt not iudge me if I chastise my selfe thou wilt not condemne mee if I execute my owne iust and vnpartiall sentence against mine owne heart the capitall offender thou wilt fauourably spare and mercifully pardon mee for euer O Lord I pray not for my selfe alone but for thy whole Church wheresoeuer dispersed howsoeuer distressed vpon the face of the earth As I pray that thou wilt bee mercifull to mee particularly so I beg also that thou wilt be fauourable to Sion vniuersally Being a member of that mystical body whereof thy Christ is the head so long as I haue spirituall life in me I cannot but resent such afflictions as any of thy chosen do sustaine ô Lord I pray thee for Ierusalem the kingdom wherein I liue that peace may be within her walls prosperity in her palaces I cannot but out of honest affection wish well to my brethren neighbours and companions that their persons may be protected their walls of wood or stone reedifyed fo often as neede requireth that not for necessity onely but for comelinesse also But I must still professe that I regard the Case for the 〈◊〉 sake which is compassed therewith the Common-wealth for thy house and that portion of thy Church that is preserued therein I respect chiefely Sion thy darling and the ioy of the whole earth My precious goods are imbarqued in that ship What fortune betides them I am contented shall befall me I will sympathise reioyce and mourne with them vpon all occasions I doe acknowledge no neerer affinity no deerer consanguinity no better fraternity then is Christianity nay my spirituall kindred is of more esteeme with mee 〈◊〉 any naturall or legall coniunction whatsoeuer O Lord shew thy fauor to Sion for thy good pleasures sake shee hath no other motiue to induce thee no other mediator to intercede with thee Bee gracious to her for his sake in whom thou art well pleased Be pleased of thy selfe thine owne goodnes for thy selfe thine owne glory to shew this loue vnto thy Spouse though foule in her owne nature yet faire by thy gracious acceptation These graces O Lord which I begge zealously for my selfe and others I beseech thee to grant mercifuly that I may 〈◊〉 thee with prayse and prayse thee with loue that I may thankefully acknowledge thy gracious goodnesse and in testimony thereof render vnto thee all honour and glory all manner of prayses and thankes all the dayes of my life euen for euer and euer Amen FINIS Bern. ad frat in Mon. Tertul. de Paenit Aug. in 〈◊〉 51. Chrysost. in hunc Psalmum Psal. 103. Melius impressum quà m expressum innotescit In his non capit intelligentia nisi quantum attingit 〈◊〉 Bern. in Cant. 3. Qui non gustauerit non intelliget quà m 〈◊〉 sapit mel Aug. in Psal. 30. Rom. 5. Miserationum Dei nec magnitudo mensurari nec multitudo numerari potest Basil. Ierem. 31. Psal. 38. Iob. 7. Iohn 13. Rom. 12. 〈◊〉