downe he looked all over his waies And as Zachary saith When the people shall looke unto him whom they have pierced and consider the nature of their sinnes then shall they mourne Note that this clear sight of sin may appeare in two particulars First a man must see his sinne nakedly in its owne proper colours we must not looke upon sinne through many mediums through profits pleasures and the contentments of this world for so we mistake sinne but the soule of a true Christian that would see sinne clearely he must strip it cleane of all content and quiet that ever the heart hath received from any corruption and the heart must looke upon sinne in the danger of it as the adulterer must not looke upon sinne in regard of the sweetnes of it nor the drūkard upon his sinne in regard of the contentment that comes thereby nor the covetous man in regard of the profit that comes by his sinne you that are such the time will come when you must die and then consider what good these sinfull courses will doe you how will you judge of sinne then when it shall leave a blot upon thy soule and a guilt upon thy conscience what wilt thou then thinke of it we must deale with sinne as with a serpent we must not play with a serpent as children doe because it hath a fine speckled skinne but fly from it because of the sting so must we deale with sinne a prophane gallant will prophane the Sabbaths because otherwise he should be counted a puritane Looke not at the speckled skin of sinne but how thou canst answere for thy sinne before God especially seeing the Lord saith I will not hold that man guiltles that blasphemes my name of what place or condition so ever he be Looke now on the nature of thy sinnes nakedly Secondly we must looke on the nature of sin in the venome of it the deadly hurtfull nature that it hath for plagues and miseries it doth procure to our soules and that you may doe partly if you compare it with other things and partly if you looke at it in regard of your selves First compare sinne with those things that are most fearefull and horrible As suppose any soule here present were to behold the damned in hell and if the Lord should give thee a little peepe hole into hell that thou didst see the horror of those damned soules and thy heart begins to shake in the consideration thereof then propound this to thy owne heart what paines the damned in hel doe indure for sinne and thy heart will shake and quake at it the least sinne that ever thou didst commit though thou makest a light matter of it is a greater evill then the paines of the damned in hell setting aside their sinne all the torments in hell are not so great an evill as the least sinne is men begin to shrink at this loath to go downe to hell and to be in endlesse torments Now I will make it good by three reasons that sinne is a greater evill then those torments and plagues which the damned in hell do indure The first reason is this That which deprives a man of the greatest good must needs be the greatest evill nature saies so much that which deprives a man of all that comfort and happinesse wherein the soule finds most content that must needs be the greatest euill of all but sinne onely deprives a mā of the greatest good for the good of the soule is to have an heart united unto God and to have fellowship with him to have him salvation through him to be one with the Lord this is the chiefest good of the soule All things here below are made for the good of the body and the body is made for the good of the soule and the soule is made for God and these things here below are only so farre good to us as they are meanes to make us enjoy a nearer communion with God and contrarily riches and honours and profits and pleasures are as so many curses to us if by them our hearts be withdrawne from God The reason why God is estranged from us it is not because we are poore or pursued or imprisoned or the like but it is sin that breakes the union betweene God and us as the prophet Esay saith Your sinnes have separated betweene you and your God Now that which separates from God which is the chiefest good it is our sinnes it is not punishment that takes away the mercy of God from us but a proud rebellious heart and the contempt of Gods ordinances Therefore sinne is farre worse then all the plagues that the damned doe or can suffer Secondly because there is nothing so contrary and opposite against the Lord as sinne corruption and this is the reason why God is the inflicter of all the punishments of the damned in hell it is through the Iustice of God that they are damned because God is of such a pure nature that sinne cannot be in him nor practised by him Thirdly because it is sinne that doth procure all plagues and punishments to the damned and therefore being the cause why they suffer it must needs be greater then all punishments for all punishments are made miserable by reason of sin therefore sinne is a greater evill then all the miseries of the damned If a man were in prison and had the peace of a good Conscience his prison would be a pallace unto him and though a man were in shame and disgrace and yet have the favour of God there were no misery in him so it is with sinne if no man suffer but for sinne then sin is a greater evill then all other punishments as being the fountaine from whence they flow Now let us looke upon sinne through these things and when our corrupt heart provokes us and the world allure us the devill tempts us to take any contentment in a sinfull way suppose we saw hell fire burning before us and the pit of hell gaping to swallow us and sinne inticing of us and let us say thus to our soules It is better for a man to be cast into the torments of hell amongst the damned then to be ouercome with any sin and so to rebell against the Lord. Now therefore if those plagues and punishments make the soule shake in the consideration of them Oh then blesse thy selfe so much the more from sinne which is the cause all plagues whatsoever Were a man in hell and wanted his sinnes the Lord would love him in hell and deliver him from all those plagues But if any man were free from all punishments and in honour and wealth if he were a sinfull and wretched creature the Lord would hate him in the height of all his prosperitie and throw him downe to hell for ever Secondly we must see sinne simply as it is in it selfe in regard of the proper worke of it it is nothing else but a
the bottome And let me advise you to this when your soules are wrought upon by any reproofes or admonitions take that truth and labour to maintaine the power of it upon your hearts all the weeke after and let your soules be awed by it Thirdly consider what thy soule findes to be most evill and detestable whether it be poverty or disgrace or losse of liberty and then marke what I say get up thy heart higher in the very apprehension of sinne as it is sinne and let thy soule be more affected with the vilenesse of sin then of any other hardship whatsoever As thus suppose thy heart be vere proud if shame and disgrace befal thee oh how doth this heart shake in the apprehension of it he can live no longer except some honour come Now sinne is worse then shame therefore looke up to heaven say oh my heart did shake with shame but sinne is farre worse for what if the Lord take away my honour that he hath promised to such as feare his name and what if he blot my name out of the booke of life therefore sinne is worst of all this is certaine there is no evill the soule feares or finds but sinne is the cause of it but the separation of the soule from the Lord is the greatest evil and sinne is the cause of it and therefore rest not till thy soule shake in the apprehension of it This is the next way to be above punishment or any thing else Now I come to the fruits of godly sorrow which are from these words They said to Peter the other Apostles Men and brethren what shall wee do In these words there are three things presumed and three things plainly expressed First there are three things presumed they did see themselves in a miserable and damnable condition as if they had said hell is now gaping it is but turning of the ladder and we goe to hell for ever Men and brethren what shall we doe Secondly they themselves were ignorant and could not direct themselves what to doe to come out of this estate and therefore they said Men and brethren advise vs what to doe if there be any help yee know it Yet still there is a secret kinde of hope and the heart suspects that it may and will be otherwise with them they doe not say there is nothing to bee done no they say What shall we doe surely there is some way to finde helpe if wee could tell it Againe there are three things plainly expressed in these words they make an open and plaine confession of their sinnes when they were sicke at the hearâ— they could make open confession and lay the hand upon the sore and say If there be any vile wretches under heaven we are they Secondly a thorough resolution against their sinnes and a hatred of the same as if they had said We are resolved to doe any thing whatsoever it is we care not so we may thwart our sinnes The last thing expressed is a sequestration of the soule from this sinne the soule falles off from them and bids farewell to all cursed courses First I come to the three things presumed and because I shall have occasion afterward to handle the two former Therefore now I come to the last of the three which is this Men and brethren What shall we doe Surely there is some course to bee taken Is there not you that are Gods Prophets tell vs if there be any hope for such poore distressed sinners as we are So the Doctrine is this there is a secret hope of mercy wherewith God supports the hearts of those that are truly broken hearted for their sinnes howsoever these men did see themselves miserable yet they did not throw off all say Men and brethren there is no hope for vs therefore we will heare no more but seeing we must go to hell we wil take our pleasure while we live here in the world while we may and if we must bee damned we will be damned for some thing No these people had some hope that they should finde mercy the Lord bruised the heart but he did not breake it the Lord will not quench the smoking flaxe but kindles it further and the Lord drawes on the worke of the soule and pluckes it to himself and makes it looke vp to him and waite vpon him for helpe and mercy I confesse it is true that sometimes the soule in some desperate fit and in some horrour of heart when temptation growes violent long and the distempers of a mans heart stir exceedingly then a man may seeme to cast of all and resolve with Dauid when he had beene long persued by Saul I shall one day fall by the hand of Saul So the soule sayth God will one day leaue me and I shall perish And as Dauid sayth in another place All men are lyers that is they sayd I shall be King of Israel but they are all deceived They all lyers but it was in his haste in a proud impatient haughty humour of soule This is our nature if God buckle not to our bow and heare us not even when wee will then in a proud humor wee are apt to say oh my sins will never be pardoned and I shall never get ground against my corruptions a man that is in a swoune lies as if he were dead but yet he comes to himselfe againe and lookes up and speakes So how ever the soule in some unruly humor is driven to a swoune and thinkes it impossible to finde mercy or overcome his corruption yet still he recovers againe and the soule that is truly broken for sinne is upheld as Ionas said I am cast out of thy preseÌ„ce I am eveÌ„ sinking yet will I looke towards thy holy temple So howsoever the soule may be over-whelmed in a drunken fit of pride or impatience yet aftes the soule hath prayed it saith I will wait upon God for mercy God deales with poore sinnners in this case as men doe that pound pretious powder as Bezar stone or the like to make some potion withall they will breake it and pound it all to pieces yet they cover it up close and will not loose the least sand of it as they breake it so they keepe it close that none be lost So when God doth purpose to doe good to your soules he will breake you and melt you and then you thinke he hath cast you off in his anger No no he is pounding of you but he will preserve those soules notwithstanding and will not lose such poore sinners whom he purposeth to doe good unto As it is with pocket dyâ—ls a man may shake them this way and that way but they are still northward by vertue of the loadstone so there are many shakings in the soule sometime it feareth God will not be mercifull he sometimes hopes that he will thus it is tossed to and fro but still it is heaven-ward there is a
and stubbornnes be such vile sins in others then they are so in me and as there must be a sight of our personall particular sinnes so Secondly the soule must be set downe with the audience of truth and the conscience of a sinner should be so convicted as to yeeld and give way to that which is knowne as not seeking any shift or way to oppose that truth which is revealed his particular apprehension of sin is like the inditement of a sinner before God and his conviction is that which brings the soule to such a passe that the heart will not nay it dares not nay which is more it cannot escape from the truth revealed As when a man is only arested and no more he may escape therefore it is not enough particularly to arest the soule and bring it under command that it cannot shift from the truth revealed When the Lord comes to make rackes in the hearts of such as he meanes to doe good unto the text saith he will reprove the world of sinne that is he will convince the world of wickednesse he will set the soule in such a stand that it shall have nothing to say for it selfe he cannot shift it off for there is in every mans heart naturally such corrupt carnall pleading that it labors to defeat and put by the worke of the word that it may not come home to the heart As a man in battaile array labours to put by the blow that it may not hit his body so it is with a corrupt heart when the word comes home to the soule as it doth sometimes into the heart of a drunkard or an adulterer or a murtherer and the word of God seemes to stabbe the heart they put by the word of God by carnall shifts and so breake the power of it that it cannot have its full blow upon the soule and so the word takes no place to any purpose in them Now this kind of knowledge takes away all shifts that the soule hath nothing to say for it selfe and pluckes away all defence that the edge of the word cannot be blunted but that it will fall flat on the heart this is that I would put to your consideration punctually When there is that wisedome and knowledge revealed to the soule so powerfully that it prevailes with the heart and it gives way thereto so that all the replies and pleas of the soule be taken away and the soule falls under the stroke of the word not quarrelling but yeelding it selfe that the word may worke upon it and withall there is a restlesse amasement put into the heart of the creature and a kind of dazeling the eye so that the soule is not content now before it see the worst of his sinne that is revealed and then it lies under the power of that truth which is made knowne these two make it plaine The minister saith God hates such and such a sinner and the Lord hates me too saith the soule for I am guilty of that sin Many times when a sinner comes into the congregation and attends unto the ordinary meanes of salvation if now the Lord be pleased to work mightily at last the mind is enlightned and the Minister meets with his corruptions as though he were in his bosome and he answereth all his cavills and takes away all his objections With that the soule begins to be amased to thinke that God should meet with him in this manner and saith If this be so as it is for ought I know and if all be true that the Minister saith then the Lord be mercifull unto my soule I am the most miserable sinner that ever was borne Give me leave to open a passage or two this way Suppose there be an ignorant creature that knoweth nothing and he thinkes God will pardon him because he is so he need not consider of this or that which the minister calls upon him for see what God saith to such in Esay It is a people of no understanding therefore he that made him will not have mercy on them and he that formed them will shew them no favour You thinke to carry all away with ignorance but the God of heaven will shew you no pitty and he that made you will not save you When a poore soule begins to consider of this he that made us wil save us Will he not no he will not Not one of you not your wife nor children nor thy servant this drives the soule into amazement when the Lord works this truth in him and he frequents the ordinances more diligently and saies if it be so my case is fearefull In conclusion he finds every minister saith so and all writings confirme it and he seeth it is so indeed and it is the will and way of God Then the soule is cast and saith I see this is just my estate and condition therefore woe to me that ever I was borne This is right conviction and though his carnall neighbours come to him and beginne to cheere him up and say The Lord is more merciful then men are ministers must say something c. If the heart be truly convicted it returnes this answere and saith I have thought as you doe but now I see there is no such matter these are but figtree-leaves and will not cover my nakednesse It is true Christ came to save sinners and he came to humble sinners too he came to bind up the heart and he came to break the heart too This is a great part of the spirit of bondage spoken of Rom. 8.15 Wee have not received the spirit of bondage to feare againe When God hath revealed a mans bondage to him So that sees he himselfe bouÌ„d haÌ„d foot for marke it so long as a man keepes in these carnall shifts he is not in bondage But when he is once in bondage and fetterd he saith If ever any had a proud heart I am he If ever any were prophane I am he And if ever God hated such wretches he hateth me Now there is no escape there is no plea at all he will not go away say there is no such matter Ministers many say what they will No no the soule that is truely conuicted of sinne yeelds it selfe and saith I have sinned Oh what shall I do unto thee thou preserver of men saith Iob as if hee had said Lord I have no plea at all to make nor no argument to alledge for myselfe I onely yeeld up the bucklers I cannot say so bad of my selfe as I am I have sinned Lord what shall I doe unto thee Oh thou preserver of men thus it is with a heart truely convicted and throughly informed of the vilenesse of sinne he doth not withdraw himâ—elfe and play least in sight but he saith this is my condition just the Lord met with my heart this day God resists the proud prophane in heart and he resists me too I have heard much and would not be informed
and I would have a man to bind his heart hand and foote that they may not dare to have any brabling against the revealed will of God that so what ever truth is delivered though never so crosse and contrary to our corrupt nature the soule may be willing to be under the blow of it and let the strength of the word come full upon the heart And this will make us feelingly to understand our conditions as in Iob when God had taken downe his proud heart see how he submits himselfe Behold I am vile what shall I say I will lay my hand upoÌ„ my mouth I have sinned but I will go nâ— further as thogh he had reasoned thus with himselfe I have I confesse pleaded too much for my selfe I have made more shift for my selfe theÌ„ was needfull I have gainsaid thy word but now no more Now if any man seeme to quarrell take up armes against the truth of God let that man know he was never truly huÌ„bled for his sins It is a sinfull rebellious spirit that carries it selfe thus against God his word the shifts whereby the soule labours to beate backe the power of the word may be reduced to these three heads First the soule hath a slight apprehension of sin and thinketh that it is not so hainous and so dangerous as those hot spirited ministers beare men in hand this is usually the common conceit of all men naturally and even of us all more or lesse to make a slight account of sinne and that for these foure respects First in respect of the commonnesse of it because that every man is guilty of it we slight it what saith one Good now what then are not all sinners as well as we though we have many faylings yet we have many fellowes If we were drunkards or whoremongers then it were somewhat Thou sayest true indeed thou hast many fellowes in thy sinnes and thou shalt have share with many fellowes in the punishment to come there is roome enough in hell for thee and all thy fellowes hell hath opened her mouth wide nay the more companions thou hast had in thy sinnes the more shall be thy plagues Quest. O saith one all the world lies in sinne and we doe no more then the world doth Answ. But if the world lies in sin Christ never prayed for the world and he will never save the world What a senselesse thing is this to be such a 〈◊〉 as God hates Is this all thy pleasure that thou art a hater of God What ods is it for a man to be stabbed with a penknife or with a speare or for a man to be murdered in the streets or in his bed so though thy sinnes be not hydious blasphemies and the like yet if they be petty oathes they are enough to sinke thy soule It is not your great swearer but no swearer shall come into the Kingdome of heaven the text saith not no great liers shall enter into heaven but no liers shall enter into heaven What differeÌ„ce is there between a man that goes to hell for open rebellion and a man that goes to hell for civill profession and what difference is there betweene an open adulterer and a secret adulterer Quest. But some will say are not all sinfull by nature and are not some saved and why not I as well as others Answ. For answer I say no man is saved by nature but if any be saved the Lord opens his eyes and breakes his heart and so it must be with thee too if ever thou thinkest to receive any mercy from God Secondly there is also a naturalnesse in a sinfull course and they say it is my nature and infirmity and I am of a cholericke disposition I shall sometimes sweare when I am angry and I cannot but be drunke sometimes when I light into good company Quest. What would you have of us Saints on earth Answ. I either Saints or Devills never sanctified never saved never pâ—rged never glorified as the Apostle Saint Iohn saith He that hath this hope purgeth himselfe as he is pure he striveth with his whole endeauour to be pure and alwayes he hath a respect to all Gods commandemeÌ„ts And as the author to the Hebrewes saith pursue faith and holinesse without which no man can be saved If thou dost say if it were an honour to pray in my family if Gentlemen and Knights did it I would doe it I tell thee if holines doth seeme to fly away by disgrace persecution theÌ„ you must pursue it Nay dost thou say it is thy nature to sinne Then I say the greater is thy wickednesse if it be thy nature so to doe We hate not a man because he drinkes poyson but we hate a â—oad because it is of a poysonus nature therfore rather mourne the more for thy sinnes because it is thy cursed nature so to doe And say Lord did only temptations or the world allure me to this there were some hope that thou wouldest have mercy upon me but O Lord I have a cursed nature and though there were no Devills nor world no temptations outwardly yet this cursed nature of mine would sinne against thee They that have received Christ have a new nature and therefore if I have a carnall corrupt nature then my condition is most fearefull And say did temptations the world allure me then there were some hope of mercy but it is my nature to sinne and therefore my estate and condition is most miserable wretched Oh wretched man that I am who shall deliver me from this body of death Thirdly many say words are but winde and all this winde shakes no corne And so when we presse men to the inward worke of the soule not onely to keepe men from the halter but to tell them they must pull downe their proud hearts and be humbled for their sinnes and the like then they reply thoughts flie away suddenly and thoughts are free To which I answer these words are such winde as will blow downe thy soule into the bottomlesse pit of hell It is not I that say so but our Saviour himselfe By thy words thou shalt be justisfied and by thy words thou shalt be condemned though you make nothing of your swearing and idle thoughts and revilings of Gods people yet the God of heaven will require them at your hands and you shall either receive acquittance from Christ of them or else vengeance for ever for them For the Lord commeth with thousands of his Saints in flaming fire to punish not onely murtherers and adulterers and the like but all ungodly ones the Lord will call thee to an accompt for all thy abominations nay for all thy speeches against the people of God upon thy ale-bench when thou diddest tosse theÌ„ too and fro and the Lord will set thy sinnes in order before thee nay he will call thee to an accompt for them for all thy thoughts though
First his eye is ever upon it his mouth is ever speaking of it and he is alwaies complaining against it and he is readily content to take shame to himselfe for it If a man have a sore place in his body his eye and his finger will ever be upon it so it is with the soule As the people when they apprehended the hideous wrath of God against them they entreated Samuel to pray for them for say they We have added to all our sinnes this specially in asking of us a King As it is with a man that hath the stone in the reines or some stitch in his side or where ever his paine or trouble is there he complaines most and when the PhysitiaÌ„ comes to feele on his body he saith is it here no â—â—ith he is it here and wheÌ„ he commeth to the right place he saith there it is cut there and launce there So it is with a man that is stung with the vile nature of sinne when he comes to complaine of sinne he doth not altogether complaine of his horrour nor of death but he saith O! that chambring and wantonnesse that pride and stubbornnesse and rebellion of heart O! that ryoting and malice against the Saints of God The soule seeth this complaines of it and takes shame to himselfe for it as Paul deales with himselfe which argues a heart truly weary of corruption I was a persecutor and a blasphemer and the like and I was received to mercy he doth not say I was in horrour or in trouble but I was a persecutor he doth not say I was thus and thus plagued but I was an injurious person to Gods Church there he was weary and there he would be eased if it were possible Let all vile wretches tremble at it for God hath enough for all Pharoes and Nymrods Away therefore with all these Lapwing cries and complaints it is the nature of that bird to cry flutter most when she is farthest from her neast because by this meanes she would cozen passengers and have her young ones So it is with an hypocrite he will complaine a great way off of his sinne and have some secret turning It is admirable to see how hard it is for a man to lay open his sinnes before God it is a signe that he is never weary of sinne that he is not willing truly to confesse his sinne when he is lawfully called to it and when he pretends 〈◊〉 it is true sometimes God will accept of a confession made to him in secret if it be in truth but when God will have a man unbowell himselfe and all his abominations and when a man commeth and desires comfort in this kinde then for a man to cover his sinne and to complaine a farre off of some ordinary corruption which every poore child of God is troubled with and that particular lust whereof he is guilty for shame he is not willing to acknowledge this argueth that the heart is naught and never sound this wearisomnesse of sinne I know that the best heart under heaven will have many windings and turnings but the Lord will never leave the heart in this case till he come to deale plainly and say these are my sinnes and this is my uncleannes and this is my secret theft and thus he openeth himselfe at large to that man whom God hath appointed for that end but some are content to confesse and complaine of their sinnes when God hath them upon the racke and Judas did but marke his punishment is the greatest cause of his complaint and hell is his greatest feare he 〈◊〉 weary of sinne because of the plague and punishment due to it but he never regards the vilenesse of sinne in this respect because it makes a separation betweene God and his soule Secondly as the soule complaines of the vile nature of sin and desires to have his face covered with shame for it is so in the second place it will never meddle with nor give way to any thing that is sinfull so farre as it is revealed so to be setting aside sudden passions and violent temptations but when a man is come to himselfe againe his conscience is awakened this is sure the soule will not dare to tamper with any thing that is sinful why becaus it hath bin wearied with the burthen of it before It is the practice of the lamenting Church in Hosea Ashur shall not save us we will not ride on horses neither will we say to the workes of our hands Ye are our Gods for with thee the fatherles finde mercy That is we wil meddle no more with any thing that is sinfull whâ—reby we have dishonoureâ— God heretofore for they had trusted in their horses made Idols and relyed upon them but now they cast them cleane off The reason is because when the soule seeth sin as it is sinne and that it is burthen to the soule and the heart is now weary of it it will lay no more weight upon it because now the heart is weary enough already The blasphemer feares an oath the adulterer shakes to see his quean and he trembles to see the place where his abominations have beene committed and now his heart loathes all these If a man hath beene once at deaths doore by drinking deadly poyson he will never tast of it more Nay he will not endure the sight of that cup he wil rather fare hardly and rather starve then eate and drinke that which shall kill him so saith the soule it is sin that hath made a separation betweene me and my God this pride or this uncleannesse had been the death of me if God had not beene mercifull unto me and therefore I will rather sinke and die then meddle with these sinnes any more And hence it is that if any thing come under the colour of corruption the soule that is truly weary of sinne saith Omitting of this duty is evill and therefore I will not omit it the doing of this action is sinfull and therefore I will not doe it because the sinne is worse then the plague he will take the lesse evill of the two as we use to doe in other matters if a man hate his sinne for the plague then so soone as that is removed he returnes to his sinne againe the blow was but weake This was the fault in Judas his sorrow he did see and confesse his sinnes and bewaile them and did more then many will doe now a daies tooke shame to himselfe buâ— though he confessed and complained of his sinne yet he would rather commit murther upon himselfe then under-goe the horrour of sinne if he had beene weary of sin because of the loathsomenesse of it he would not have layed violent hands upon himselfe These two passages are every where where true saving grace is Now in the third place if God should deprive a sinner of his judgement and horrour of conscience yet if his heart be truely apprehensive
hope that it may be otherwise For the Lord holds the soule by a secret vertue to himselfe and drawes the heart to seeke for mercy When the Prodigall child was brought to a desperate strait he beganne to consider what he had done whereas before he said shall I ever be a slave in my fathers familie but at last when all was spent what doth he doe he saith It is true I can looke for no help and favour and I cannot tell whether my Father will receive me or no yet my Fathers servants have bread enough and I shall starve for hunger O wretch that I am I have left a kinde fathers house yet come what will I will home to my father and say Father I have sinned Thus the soule thinkes with it selfe Oh the many sweet and gratious cals that I have had how often hath Christ come home to my heart and desired entrance and yet I shut the doore upon him shall I now goe home to the Lord Jâ—sus Christ How justly may he reject me that have rejected him he may damne me and yet he may save me therefore I will wait upon him for mercy thus the soule will not off from God but it hath a secret hope wherewith the Lord keepes the heart to himselfe The first reason is because unlesse the Lord should leave this hope in the heart it would utterly be overthrowne with despaire You that make nothing of your loose thoughts and vaine speeches I tell you if God did set but one sinfull thought upon thy heart thy soule would sinke under it the Lords wrath would drive thee to marvelous desperation were it not that the Lord doth uphold thee with one hand as he beats thee downe with the other I say it were impossible but the soule should despaire as the proverb is But for hope the heart would breake Who can stand under the Almighty hand of God unlesse he doth uphold him God hath broken off the sinner by this sorrow but he will not throw him to hell As the gardiner cuts off a graft to plant it into a new stocke not to burne it So the Lord cuts off a sinner from all abomination but he wil not cast him into hell and the Lord melts the heart of a poore sinner but consumes him not but as the goldsmith melts his gold not to consume it all away but to make it a better vessel So the Lord melts a poore sinner to make him a vessell of glory the Lord will fire those proud hearts of yours and clip off those knotty lusts but if you belong to him he will leave a little remainder of hope that you shall be formed and fashioned not consumed It is the argument of the Lord by the Prophet He will come and dwell with and refresh the broken soule and he will not contend for ever lest the Spirit should faile before him If the Lord should let in but one scattering shot of his vengeance into the heart it were enough to drive the soule to despaire but God will lay no more upon us then will doe good to us Secondly if the Lord did not leave this hope in the heart a mans indeavours in the use of the meanes would be altogether killed if there be no hope of good then there is no care of using the meanes whereby any good may be obtained Good is the loadstone of all our endeavors a man will not labour for nothing therefore despaire killes a mans labours and pluckes up the root of all his indeavours If there be any good present hope makes us labour to encrease it if any good be to come hope labours to attaine it But good there must be So hope provokes the soule to use the meanes and to say I am a damned man but if there be any hope I will pray and heare and fast who knowes but God may shew mercy to my poore soule Now gather up all if without this secret hope the heart would faile and if without it a mans indeavours would be utterly crusht and come to nothing then it is no wonder that the Lord in his infinite mercy and wisedome when he will doe good to the soule leaveth some secret hope of mercy First we may here take notice of the marvelous tenderness and the loving nature of God in dealing with poore sinners that in al his courses of justice remembers some mercy and in all the potion of his wrath still he drops in some cordials of comfort he deales not with us as he might but so as might be most comfortable every way and usefull to worke upon our hearts to draw our soules home unto himself Should the Lord come out against a poore sinner and in his wrath let fly against him his soule would sinke downe under him but blessed be God that he doth not deale with our hearts as we deserve if he were as rigorous against us as we have beene rebellious against him we should sinke in sorrow and fall into despaire never to be recovered any more But as the Lord batters us so he releeves us as we may see in Saul he had gotten letters to Damascus and now he hoped being generall of the field to bind and to imprison all and he would not spare the poore Christians a jot but Christ meets him in the field threw him downe and might have killed him too but the Lord desired rather that he might be humbled then confounded I cannot read that ever he shewed his letters but layed all flat downe before the Lord and so was accepted the Lord shewed him his misery yet he lets him not perish there but gives him a little crevise of comfort When the Lord dealt with the children of Israel he said I will allure her and bring her into the wildernesse and there I will give her the valley of Achor for the doore of hope When Achan was stoned for stealing the wedge of gold the Israelites called it the valley of Achor and so it is called to this day The valley of Achor is the valley of trouble of stoning or consternation so the Lord doth here he draweth the soule into the wildernesse of sorrow for sinne but doth he leave the soule there no there is the doore of hope also and there the soule shall sing as in former times And hereupon the soule saith there is some hope that God will do good unto me for all this there is hope the Lord is melting me to make me a vessel of glory that 's a gloomy night when there is neither moone nor candle to be seen so though the soule be marvelous gloomy and heavy yet there is some crevise of light and consolation let into the heart still chearing and refreshing it the Lord knowes what metall we are made of and remembers that we are but dust therefore he so corrects us that he may leave an inkling of mercy and favour in our hearts O therefore