flesh but for him God took him and cloathed him living with immortality I finde none but him and Elijah that were thus fetcht to their Heaven It will be happy for us if we may pass in the common road to blessedness O God give me to walk close and constantly with thee and what end thou pleasest let my body pass through all the degrees of corruption so that my soul may be immediately glorious FINIS THE BREATHINGS OF THE Devout Soul I. BLessed Lord God thou callest me to obedience and fain would I follow thee but what good can this wretched heart of mine be capable of except thou put it there thou know'st I cannot so much as wish to think well without thee I have strong powers to offend thee my sins are my own but whence should I have any inclination to good but from thee who art only and all good Lord work me to what thou requirest and then require what thou wilt II. Lord God whither need I go to seek thee Thou art so with me as that I cannot move but in thee I look up to heaven there I know thy Majestie most manifests it self but withall I know that being here thou art never out of thy heaven for it is thy presence onely that makes heaven Oh give me to enjoy thee in this lowest region of thine heavenly habitation and as in respect of my naturall being I live and move in thee so let me not live and move spiritually but with thee and to thee III. Whither now O whither do ye rove O my thoughts Can ye hope to finde rest in any of these sublunary contentments Alas how can they yeeld any stay to you that have no settlement in themselves Is there not enough in the infinite good to take you up but that ye will be wandring after earthly vanities Oh my Lord how justly mightest thou cast me off with scorn for casting any affective glances upon so base a rival Truly Lord I am ashamed of this my hatefull inconstancy but it is thou only that must remedy it O thou that art the father of mercies pity my wildnesse and weak distractions Take thou my heart to thee it is thine own keep it with thee tye it close to thee by the cords of love that it may not so much as cast down an eye upon this wretched and perishing world IIII. Lord I confesse to my shame thou art a great loser by me for besides my not improving of thy favors I have not kept even-reckonings with thee I have not justly tallied up thy inestimable benefits Thy very privative mercies are both without and beyond my account for every evill that I am free from is a new blessing from thee That I am out of bondage that I am out of pain and misery that I am out of the dominion of sin out of the tyranny of Satan out of the agonies of an afflicted soul out of the torments of hell Lord how unspeakeable mercies are these Yet when did I bless thee for any of them Thy positive bounties I can feel but with a benummed and imperfect sence Lord do thou enlarge and intenerate my heart make me truly sensible as of my good received so of my escaped evils and take thou to thy self the glory of them both V. Ah my Lord God what heats and colds do I feel in my soul Sometimes I finde my self so vigorous in grace that no thought of doubt dare shew it self and me thinks I durst challenge my hellish enemies another while I feel my self so dejected and heartlesse as if I had no interest in the God of my salvation nor never had received any certain pledges of his favour What shall I say to this various disposition Whether Lord is it my wretchednesse to suffer my self to be rob'd of thee for the time by temptation or whether is this the course of thy proceedings in the dispensation of thy graces to the sons of men that thou wilt have the breathings of thy Spirit as where so how and when thou pleasest Surely O my God if I did not know thee constant to thine everlasting mercies I should be utterly disheartened with these sad intervals now when my sense failes me I make use of my faith and am no lesse sure of thee even when I feel thee not then when I finde the clearest evidences of thy gracious presence Lord shine upon me with the light of thy countenance if it may be alwaies but when ever that is clouded strengthen thou my faith so shall I be safe even when I am comfortless VI. O my God I am justly ashamed to think what favors I have received from thee and what poor returns I have made to thee Truly Lord I must needs say thou hast thought nothing either in earth or in heaven too good for me and I on the other side have grudg'd thee that weak and worthless obedience which thou hast required of me Alas what pleasure could I have done to thee who art infinite if I had sacrificed my whole self to thee as thou commandest Thou art and wilt be thy self though the world were not it is I I only that could be a gainer by this happy match which in my own wrong I have unthankfully neglected I see it is not so much what we have as how we imploy it O thou that hast been so bountiful in heaping thy rich mercies upon me vouchsafe to grant me yet one gift more give me grace and power to improve all thy gifts to the glory of the giver otherwise it had been better for me to have been poor then ingrateful VII Ah Lord What strugling have I with my weak fears how do I anticipate my evils by distrust What shall I do when I am old How shall I be able to indure pain How shall I pass through the horrid gates of death Oh my God Where is my faith that I am thus surprized Had I not thee to up-hold and strengthen my soul well might I tremble and sink under these cares but now that I have the assurance of so strong an helper as commands all the powers of heaven earth and hell what a shame is it for me to give so much way to my wretched infidelity as to punish my self with the expectation of future evils Oh for the victorie that overcomes the world even our faith Thou O God art my refuge and strength a very present help in trouble therefore will I not fear though the earth be removed and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the Sea VIII Lord I made account my daies should have been but an inch but thou hast made them a span long having drawn out the length of a crazie life beyond the period of my hopes It is for something sure that thou hast thus long respited me from my grave which look't for me many years ago Here I am O my God attending thy good pleasure Thou know'st best what thou hast to do
a deep study fixed our eyes upon that which we the while thought not upon neither perceived that we saw So doth the Christian to these worldly glories pleasures profits whiles his minde and affections are on the things above where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God There Lord let me behold those things which cannot yet be seen but shall once in the sight of them make me blessed And let me not look on the things that are seen for the things that are seen are temporary but the things which are not seen are eternal XIII There is not more strangeness then significance in that charge of the Apostle That we should put on the Lord Jesus Christ The soul is as it were a body not really and properly so according to the gross error of Tertullian but by way of allusion This body of the soul then may not be naked but must be clad as our first parents were ashamed of their bodily nakedness and so still are all their not savage posterity so may we of our spiritual Every sinner is naked those rags that he hath are so far from hiding his nakedness that they are part of it his fairest moralities are but glittering sins and his sins are his nakedness Aaron had made Israel naked to their shame not so much in that they were stripped of their earings as that they were enwrapped in the sin of idolatry No marvel if we run away and hide us from the presence of God as our first parents did whiles we are guilty to our selves of our Spiritual deformity As then we are bodily naked when we come into the world so we are spiritually naked whiles we are of the world neither can it be either safe or comely for us till we be covered There is no clothing can fit the soul but the Lord Jesus Christ all other robes in the wardrobe of Earth or Heaven are too short too straight like those which the scorn of Hanun put upon Davids messengers reaching but to the hams for though the soul of man be finite the sin of the soul is scarce so and that sin must be covered else there can be no safety for the soul according to that of the Psalmist Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven whose sin is covered None therefore but the robes of an infinite Righteousness can cover the soul so wofully dressed none therefore but the Lord Jesus Christ who is God blessed for ever can cover the soul that it may not appear unrighteous or can cleanse the soul that it may not be unrighteous and cleansed it must be ere the Lord Jesus can be put on We shall wrong his perfit holiness if we think we can slip him on as a case over our beastly rags It is with us as with Joshua the high Priest The filthy garments must first be taken off and then the Lord shall say unto us Behold I have caused thine iniquity to pass from thee and I will clothe thee with change of rayment We put on a garment when we apply it all over to our body so as that part which is clothed appears not but is defended from the air and from the eye if we have truely put on the Lord Jesus nothing of ours is seen but Christ is all in all to us although this application goes yet deeper for we so put him on that we not onely put our selves into him but also put him into our selves by a mutual kinde of Spiritual incorporation We put him on then upon our Intellectual parts by knowing him by beleeving on him This is eternal life to know thee and whom thou hast sent saith our Saviour and for Faith no grace doth so sensibly apprehend him and make him so feelingly ours We put him on upon our wills and affections when we take pleasure in him when we love him delight in him and prefer him to our chiefest joy Thus do we put him on as our Lord in our humble and dutiful subjection as our Jesus in our faithful affiance as Christ the anointed of God to be our King in all holy obedience our Priest in our willing consecration to him our Prophet in our cheerful readiness to be instructed by him How happy are we if we be thus decked we prank up these poor carcasses of ours gaily with no small expence and when we have done the stuff or the fashion or both wears out to nothing But here is a garment that will never be out of fashion Jesus Christ yesterday and to day and the same for ever yea the same to us here we put him on in Grace there in eternal Glory The Israelites were fourty years in the wilderness yet their shooes not worn their apparel not impaired but this attire shall not onely hold good in the time of our wandring in this desart but after we are come into the Canaan of glory and is best at last Wherefore do we put on our choisest attire on some high days but to testifie the cheerfulness of our hearts Let thy garment be white saith the Preacher for now God accepteth thy works Mephibosheth changed not his raiment since David went out as one that would have the sorrow of his heart seen in the neglect of his clothes although many a one under a gay coat hath an heavy heart but this attire doth not onely testifie but make cheerfulness in the soul Thou hast given me more joy of heart then they had in the time that their corn and their wine increased and In thy presence is the fulness of joy what can this apparel of ours do but keep us from a blast or a showre it is so far from safeguarding the soul that it many times wounds it and that to the death It was one of the main quarrels against the rich glutton that he was every day clothed in purple and byss How many souls shall once wish that their bodies had been ever either naked or clad with hair-cloth But this aray as it is infinitely rich and beautiful so it is as surely defensative of the soul and is no less then armor of proof against all assaults all miseries What a deal of cost and pains do we bestow upon these wretched bodies of ours onely to make them pleasing and lovely to the eye of some beholders as miserable perhaps as our selves and yet when we have all done we are it may be no better then hard-favord and unhandsome creatures and contemptible in those eyes from whom we desired most approbation Jezebel for all her licking is cast out of the window and troden to dirt in the streets But this robe we can not wear and not be amiable in the eyes of the holiest Behold thou art fair my beloved behold thou art fair and there is no spot in thee Lo in this case the apparel makes the man neither is it in the power of any spiritual deformity to make us other then lovely in the
far better XXVI There is no earthly pleasure whereof we shall not soon grow weary and be as willing to intermit as ever we were to entertain it and if the use of it continue the very frequency makes it disregarded so as that which at first we esteemed rare and precious is now looked upon as common and despicable and if it be such as that our impetuous affection is too much transported with a present fruition we are so much the more distempered in the loss on the contrary those painful yokes which at the first imposing seemed insupportable grow tolerable by custom and long acquaintance so as I know not how it comes to pass that time hath a contrary power both to aggravate and lighten evils those pleasures are onely worthy to carry our hearts which are measured by no less then eternity and those pains most justly formidable which know neither end nor remission XXVII The nearer our Saviour drew to his glory the more humility he expressed His followers were first his servants and he their Master then his disciples and he their Teacher soon after they were his friends and he theirs straightways after his resurrection and entrance into an immortal condition they were his brethren Go to my brethren and say unto them I ascend to my Father and your Father Lastly they are incorporated into him and made partakers of his glory That they also may be one with us saith he I in them and thou in me that they may be made perfect in one and the glory which thou gavest me I have given them O Saviour was this done for the depressing of thy self or for the exaltation of us or rather for both how couldst thou more depress thy self then thus to match thy self with us poor wretched creatures how couldst thou more exalt us then to raise us unto this entireness with thee the All-glorious and eternal Son of God how should we learn of thee to improve our highest advancement to our deepest humility and so to regard each other that when we are greatest we should be least XXVIII How apt we are to misconstrue the Spirit of God to our own disadvantage whiles the blessed Apostle bids us to work out our salvation with fear and trembling he doth not bid us to work it out with doubt and distrust It is the Psalmists charge that we should serve the Lord with fear and rejoyce in him with trembling so as there is a fear without diffidence and a trembling that may consist with joy trembling is an effect of fear but this fear which we must affect is reverential not slavish not distrustful Indeed when we look upon our selves and consider our own frailties and corruptions and Gods infinite justice we have too just cause of doubt and dejection yea were it not for better helps of utter despair but when we cast up our eyes to the power of him that hath undertaken for us and the faithfulness of him that hath promised and the sure mercies of him that hath begun his good work in us we can fear with confidence and rejoyce in our trembling For what are our sins to his mercies our unworthiness to his infinite merits our weaknesses to his omnipotence I will therefore so distrust my self that I will be stedfastly confident in the God of my salvation I will so tremble before the glorious Majesty of my God that I may not abate of the joy of his never-failing mercy XXIX What a large and open hand hath our God how infinitely doth his bounty transcend not the practise onely but the admiration of man We think it well if upon often asking we can receive small favors if after long delay we can be gratified with a condescent and if we have received one curtesie that is a bar to a second whereas our munificent God gives us not onely what we ask but what we ask not and therefore before we ask yea it is he that gives us to ask neither could we so much as crave good things if he did not put into us those holy desires yea he not onely gives us blessings before we ask but he gives us the best things a right to eternal glory before we are at all yea before the world was and as he prevents us in time so he exceeds our thoughts in measure giving us more then we ask Rachel would have a Son God gives her two Abraham sues that Ishmael may live God gives him to prosper and to be the father of many Princes Yet more he gives us what we cannot ask The dumb Demoniack could not sue for himself his very silence was vocal and receives what he would and could not request yea lastly which is the great improvement of his mercy he gives us against our asking our ignorance sues against our selves requiring hurtful things he will not suffer our hearts and tongues to wrong us but withholds what we unfitly crave and gives us what we should and do not crave as the fond childe cryes to his father for a knife he reaches him a spoon that may feed and not hurt him O the Ocean of divine bounty boundless bottomless O our wretched unworthiness if we be either niggardly to our selves in not asking blessings or unthankful to our God in not acknowledging them XXX Infidelity and faith look both through the same perspective glass but at contrary ends Infidelity looks through the wrong end of the glass and therefore sees those objects which are neer a far off and makes great things little diminishing the greatest spiritual blessings and removing far from us threatned evils Faith looks at the right end and brings the blessings that are far off in time close to our eye and multiplies Gods mercies which in a distance lost their greatness Thus the Father of the faithful saw his seed possessed of the promised land when as yet he had no seed nor was likely to have any when the seed which he should have should not enjoy it till after four hundred years thus that good Patriark saw Christs day and rejoyced Thus our first parent comforted himself after his ejection out of paradise with the foresight of that blessed seed of the woman which should be exhibited almost four thousand years after still and ever faith is like it self what use were there of that grace if it did not fetch home to my eye things future and invisible That this dissolved body shall be raised out of the dust and enlived with this very soul wherewith it is now animated and both of them put into a condition eternally glorious is as clearly represented to my soul in this glass as if it were already done Faithful is he that hath promised which will also do it XXXI Who can think other then with scorn of that base and unworthy conceit which hath been entertained by some that our Saviour lived here on earth upon alms He that vouchsafed to take upon him the shape of a
be welcome to the feasts of God we must put off the old man with his deeds and put on the new man which is renewed in knowledg after the image of him that created him LXXX It is not for us to cast a disparagement upon any work of our Maker much less upon a peece so neer so essential to us yet with what contempt doth the Apostle seem still to mention our flesh and as if he would have it sleighted for some forlorn out-cast he charges us not to make provision for the flesh What shall we think the holy man was faln out with a part of himself Surely sometimes his language that he gives it is hard The flesh rebels against the spirit I know that in me that is in my flesh dwelleth no good thing but how easie is it to observe that the Flesh sometimes goes for the body of man sometimes for the body of sin as the first it is a partner with the soul as the latter it is an enemy and the worst of enemies spiritual No marvel then if he would not have provision made for such an enemy In outward and bodily enmity the case and his charge is otherwise If thine enemy hunger feed him if he thirst give him drink but here make no provision for the flesh What reason were there that a man should furnish and strengthen an enemy against himself But if the flesh be the body of the man it must challenge a respect but the very name carries an intimation of baseness at the best it is that which is common to beasts with us There is one flesh saith the Apostle of men another flesh of beasts both are but flesh Alas what is it but a clod of earth better molded the clog of the soul a rotten pile a pack of dust a feast of worms But even as such provision must be made for it with a moderate and thrifty care not with a solicitous a provision for the necessities and convenience of life not for the fulfilling of the lusts This flesh must be fed and clad not humord not pampered so fed as to hold up nature not inordinateness shortly such an hand must we hold over it as that we may make it a good servant not a lawless wanton LXXXI What action was ever so good or so compleatly done as to be well taken of all hands Noah and Lot foretel of judgments from God upon the old world and Sodom and are scoffed at Israel would go to sacrifice to God in the wilderness and they are idle Moses and Aaron will be governing Israel according to Gods appointment Ye take too much upon you ye sons of Levi David will be dancing before the Ark of the Lord He uncovers himself shamelesly as one of the vain fellows Our Saviour is sociable He is a wine-bibber a freind of publicans and sinners John Baptist is solitary and austere He hath a devil Christ casts out devils He doth it by Beelzebub the prince of devils He rides in an homely pomp through Jerusalem he affects a temporal kingdom and he is no friend to Cesar that can suffer him to live He is by his Almighty powr risen from the dead his Disciples stole him away whiles the Soldiers slept The Spirit of God descends upon the Apostles in fiery and cloven tongues and they thus inspired suddenly speak all Languages they are full of new wine Stephen preacheth Christ the end of the Law He speaks blasphemous words against Moses and against God and what aspersions were cast upon the primitive Christians all Histories witness What can we hope to do or say that shall escape the censures and mis-interpretations of men when we see the Son of God could not avoyd it Let a man profess himself honestly conscionable he is a scrupulous hypocrite Let him take but a just liberty in things meerly indifferent he is loosely profane Let him be charitably affected to both parts though in a quarrel not fundamental he is an odious neuter a luke-warm Laodicean It concerns every wise Christian to settle his heart in a resolved confidence of his own holy and just grounds and then to go on in a constant course of his well-warranted judgment and practise with a careless dis-regard of those fools-bolts which will be sure to be shot at him which way soever he goes LXXXII All Gods dear and faithful ones are notably described by the Apostle to be such as love the appearing of our Lord Jesus for certainly we cannot be true friends to those whose presence we do not desire and delight in now this appearing is either in his coming to us or our going to him whether ever it be that he makes his glorious return to us for the judgment of the world and the full redemption of his elect or that he fetches us home to himself for the fruition of his blessedness in both or either we enjoy his appearance If then we can onely be content with either of these but do not love them nor wish for them our hearts are not yet right with God It is true that there is some terror in the way to both these his return to us is not without a dreadful Majestie for the Heavens shall pass away with a great noyse and the elements shall melt with fervent heat and the glorious retinue of his blessed Angels must needs be with an astonishing magnificence and on the other part our passage to him must be through the gates of death wherein nature cannot but apprehend an horror but the immediate issue of both these is so infinitely advantageous and happy that the fear is easily swallowed up of the joy Doth the daughter of Jephtah abate ought of her timbrels and dances because she is to meet a father whose armes are bloody with victory Doth a loving wife entertain her returning husband otherwise then with gladness because he comes home in a military pomp Is the conqueror less joyful to take up his crown because it is congratulated to him with many peals of Ordnance Certainly then neither that heavenly state wherein Christ shall return to us nor the fears of an harmless and beneficial death wherein we shall pass to him either may nor can hinder ought of our love to his appearing O Saviour come in whatever equipage or fashion thou wilt thou canst be no other then lovely and welcome Come Lord Jesus come quickly LXXXIII Suppose a man comes to me on the same errand which the Prophet delivered to Hezekiah Set thine house in order for thou shalt dye and not live with what welcome do I entertain him Do I with that good King turn my face to the wall and weep or do I say of the messenger as David said of Ahimaaz He is a good man and brings good tidings Surely Nature urges me to the former which cannot but hold Dissolution her greatest enemy for what can she abhor so much as a not-being
happy an issue we are delivered and must applaud it or abide a contestation and expect a challenge The fairest paradoxes cannot pass without a contradiction it were strange if some as bold and forward wits as our own should not take up the gantlet now the fray is begun the multitude is divided sides are taken the world is in an uproare from skirmishes we grow to pitcht fields the Church bleeds on both parts and it were marvel if kingdoms could be free But that which most notably evinceth the deceitfulness of mans heart in this behalf is that this pride is too often lodged in those brests which are professedly devoted to a godly and mortified lowliness for as for those persons which are meer flesh they are carelesly indifferent to error or truth neither are at all moved with the success of either but the religious minde when it is once possessed with the conceit of some singular and important truth revealed to it and hid from the rest of the world is ready to say with the Samaritan Lepers I do not well this day is a day of good tidings and I hold my peace and therefore makes it matter of conscience to trouble the Church with a mis-grounded novelty Come we to the Test Let me ask these mis-guided souls that are no less confidently perswaded of their own humility then Truth Can it be any other then an height of pride for a man to think himself wiser then the whole Church of God upon earth wiser then the whole Church of God that hath been upon earth ever since the Apostles of Christ inclusively in all successions to this present time Can they without much pride think they can look deeper into the great mysteries of Godliness then those blessed attendants of our Saviour and their gracious successors the holy martyrs the godly and religious guides of Gods Church in all the following ages Had not they then the same God the same Scriptures the illuminations of the same Spirit Can they imagine it less then insolent to attribute more to their own private opinion then to the constant judgment and practise of the whole Christian world in all successions of Generations Can they suppose themselves in their single capacity though neither Prophets nor Prophets sons meet Judges or Questionists of those matters of Faith which the general Councils of the purer times have unanimously agreed upon as the main principles of Christianity can they think themselves priviledged by the liberty of prophesying to coyn new articles to deface old Surely if the hand of pride be not in all this I shall never desire to be acquainted with humility so as it is too plain that a man may be exceeding proudly and not know it this vicious habit lurks close in the soul and unless it discover it self by some scarce discernable effects which break out now and then especially upon occasions of opposition is rather more concealed from the owner then from the eyes of a stranger But if ever it bewrays it self in the affectation of undue eminence scornful under-valuation of others merits obstinacy in opinion sharpness of censures and impatience of contradiction Of all these the world is commonly no less guilty then all these are guilty of the common miseries Lord deliver us from our pride and our contentions will dye alone V What a strange praise and priviledge is that which is given to Enoch above all those generations of men that peopled the first world of whom the Spirit of God saies Enoch walked with God and he was not for God took him Doubtless amongst all those successive families of the sons of Seth there were many religious and well-affected souls yet there was no one of them that had this character set upon him that he walked with God but he Whether it were that God did in a more open and entire way reveal himself to that exemplary Saint or whether that holy man did in a more close and familiar fashion converse with the invisible Deity the presence was certain and the acknowledgment mutual neither was this walk short for a turn and away but constant and continual even for the space of three hundred years And what did the blessed man retire to some desart far from all humane society that he might enjoy this heavenly company alone Did he this-while cast off all secular thoughts and abdicate all the care of his family Neither this nor that for in this space wherein he walked with his God he both begat sons and daughters and bred them like the children of such a father as one that knew to make the world subordinate not opposite to it's maker and had learn'd to reconcile the use of the creature with the fruition of the Creator What then were the steps of this walk but pious thoughts heavenly affections fervent love reverential fear spiritual joy holy desires divine ravishments of spirit strict obediences assiduous devotions faithful affiances gracious ingagements firme resolutions and effectual indeavors of good and whatsoever might work a dearness of respect betwixt the soul and the God of Spirits O God that which thou promisedst as a reward to those few Saints of Sardis that had not defile their garments thou hast before hand fully performed to this eminent worthy of the first world he walked with thee in white in the white of innocence here and in the shining robes of glory above so thou hast told us He was not for God took him Lo being and good were wont to pass for convertible but here Enochs not-being is his blessedness he was not at all here that he might be perfectly above The best being on earth is but miserable even Enochs walk with God cannot exempt him from sorrows he must cease to be that he may begin to be happy He was then happy not for that he was not a meer privation of being can be no other then the worst of evils but for that God took him The God with whom he walkt so long upon earth takes him away from the earth to himself for eternity Here below though he walk't with God yet withall he conversed with sinful men whose wickedness could not but many a time vex his righteous soul now he is freed from all those spiritual annoyances enjoying onely the glorious presence and vision of the Divine majesty the blessed Angels and the Saints co-partners of the same immortality There can be no doubt but that the souls of his holy predecessors Adam Abel Seth returned to the God that gave them but had not Enoch been blessed with a peculiar conveiance to his glory it had not been said That God took him were onely the spirit of Enoch yeilded up in the way of an ordinary death the man had not been taken now whole Enoch body and soul is translated to an heavenly life His father Jared and his son Methuselah went to God in the common way of men by a separation of the spirit from the
beneficial a thing is affliction especially to some dispositions more then other I see some trees that will not thrive unless their roots be laid bare unless besides pruning their bodies be gashed and sliced others that are too luxuriant except divers of their blossoms be seasonably pulld off yield nothing I see too rank corn if it be not timely eaten down may yield something to the barn but little to the granary I see some full bodies that can enjoy no health without strong evacuations blood-lettings fontinels such is the condition of our spiritual part It is a rare soul that can be kept in any constant order without these smarting remedies I confess mine cannot How wilde had I run if the rod had not been over me Every man can say he thanks God for ease for me I bless God for my troubles XXII When I consider what an insensible Atome man is in comparison of the whole body of the Earth and what a meer Center-point the Earth is in comparison of the vast circumference of Heaven and what an almost-infinite distance there is betwixt this point of Earth and that large circle of the Firmament and therewithal think of the innumerable number and immense greatness of those heavenly Luminaries I cannot but apprehend how improbable it is that those Stars should at such a distance distinguish betwixt one man and another betwixt one limb of the same body and another betwixt one spot of Earth and another and in so great a mixture and confusion of influences should give any distinct intimation of particular events in nature and much more of meer contingencies of arbitrary affairs As for the Moon by reason of her vicinity to the Earth and sensible predominance over moysture and for the Sun the great magazin of Light and Heat I acknowledg their powerful but unpartial operations upon this whole globe of Earth and Waters and every part of it not without just wonder and astonishment the other Stars may have their several vertues and effects but their marvelous remoteness and my undiscernable nothingness may seem to forbid any certain intelligence of their distinct workings upon me But whether these glorious Lights give or take any notice of such an imperceptible mite as I sure I am there is great reason I should take notice of them of their beauteous lustre of their wonderful magnitude of their regular motion and be transported with admiration of that omnipotent power wisdom providence which created this goodly and mighty host of Heaven and guides them in their constant march without the least deviation from their first setting out to the last moment of their final conflagration O the narrowness of my wretched heart that affords not room enough for wonder at that which I cannot but see XXIII It becomes not us to be niggardly where our Saviour intends bounty How glad should we be rather to ampliate the benefit of the great Work of our Redeemer but surely I cannot see upon what warrant that favor is grounded that enlargeth the fruit of Christs redemption to the Angels the good needed it not the evil were not capable of it onely mankinde was captiv'd and redeemable by that invaluable ransom Doubtless those blessed Spirits have their part in the joy and gratulation of the infinite mercy of our deliverance for if they rejoyce at the conversion of one sinner what triumph do we think there is in Heaven at the Universal Redemption of all beleevers The propriety of this favor hath reason to ingage us so much the more Lord thy mercy is free and boundless thou wouldst pass by the lapsed Angels and leave them in their sin and their chains and onely rescue miserable man out of their Hell O for an heart that might be in some measure answerable to so infinite mercy and that might be no less captiv'd to thy love then it is freed by thy Redemption XXIIII Men do commonly wrong themselves with a groundless expectation of good fore-promising to themselves all fair terms in their proceedings and all happy success in the issue boding nothing to themselves but what they wish even the man after Gods own heart could say In my prosperity I said tush I shall never be removed wherein their misreckoning makes their disappointment so much the more grievous Had not David made such account of the strength and stability of his Mountain it could not have so much troubled him to have it levell'd with the Plain on the contrary the evils which we look for fall so much the less heavily by how much we are fore-prepared for their entertainment what ever by-accidents I may meet withal besides I have two fixed matches that I must inevitably incounter with Age and Death the one is attended with many inconveniences the other with much horror let me not flatter my self with hopes of jollity and ease My comforts for Heaven shall I trust never fail me but for the present world it shall be well for me if I can without too much difficulty scramble out of the necessary miseries of life and without too much sorrow crawl to my grave XXV Heaven hath many tongues that talk of it more eyes to behold it but few hearts that rightly affect it Ask any Christian especially whom ye shall meet with he will tell you thither he shapes his course there he hath pitcht his hopes and would think himself highly wronged by that man who should make doubt of either his interest or speed But if we shall cast our eyes upon the lives of men or they reflect their eyes upon their own bosomes the hypocrisie will too palpably discover it self for surely which way so ever the faces look the hands and feet of the most men move hell-ward If malice fraud cruelty oppression injustice excess uncleanness pride contention covetousness lyes heresies blasphemies disobedience be the way thither wo is me how many walk in that wide and open road to destruction but even there where the heart pretends to innocence let a man strictly examine his own affections he shall finde them so deeply earthed that he shall be forced to confess his claim to Heaven is but fashionable Ask thy self but this one question O man whatsoever thou art ask it seriously Might I this very hour go to Heaven am I willing and desirous to make a present change of this life for a better and tell me sincerely what answer thou receivest from thine own heart Thy judgment cannot but tell thee that the place is a thousand times better that the condition would be infinitely advantageous to exchange baseness for glory misery for blessedness time for eternity a living death for a life immortal If thou do now fumble and shuffle and demur upon the resolution be convinced of thine own worldliness and infidelity and know that if thy heart had as much of Heaven as thy tongue thou couldst not but say with the chosen vessel I desire to depart hence and to be with Christ which is
servant would have hated to take upon him the trade of a begger Service is a lawful calling beggery not so he that gave life to all creatures could take a maintenance from them without asking he that did command the fish to bring the tribute money for himself and his disciples and could multiply a few loaves and fishes for the relief of thousands could rather raise a sustenance to himself and his then beg it But here was neither need nor cause even ordinary means failed not many wealthy followers who had received cures and miraculous deliverances besides heavenly doctrine from him ministred to him of their substance neither was this out of charity but out of duty in the charge which he gave to his disciples when he sent them by payrs to preach abroad he tells them the laborer is worthy of his wages and can we think this rule doth not much more hold concerning himself had not himself and his family been furnished with a meet stock raised from hence what purse was it which Judas bore and how could he be a theif in his office if his bags were empty He therefore that could say It is a more blessed thing to give then to receive certainly would not choose when it was in his power rather to receive then give The earth is the Lords and the fulness thereof and he distributes it as he pleaseth amongst the children of men For me I hope I shall have the grace to be content with whatsoever share shall fall to my lot but my prayer shall be that I may beg of none but God XXXII What a madness it is in us to presume on our interest in Gods favor for the securing of our sinfulness from judgment The Angels were deeper in it then we mortals can ever hope to be in these houses of clay yet long since are ugly Devils and they which enjoyed the liberty of the glorious Heavens are now reserved in everlasting chains of darkness And if we look down upon earth what darling had God in the world but Israel This was his first born his lot his inheritance of whom he said Here I have a delight to dwell And now where is it O the woful desolations of that select people What is it to tell of the suffossion of her vineyards vastation of her tents the devouring of her land demolition of walls breaking down Altars burning of Cities spoyling of houses dashing in peices their children ravishing their wives killing of their Priests eating of their own children of but a span long and a thousand such woful symptomes of war the Psalmist hath said a word for all in a just but contrary sense Destructions are come to a perpetual end what destruction can be more when there is no Israel How is that wretched nation vanished no man knows whither so as it was Jezebels curse that nothing was left whereof it could be said this was Jezebel So there is not one peece of a man left in all the world of whom we can say This was of one of the tribes of Israel as for those famous Churches which were since that honored with the preaching and pens of the blessed Apostles where are they now to be lookt for but amongst the rubbish of cursed Mahumetism O that we could not be high-minded but fear XXXIII What a woful conversion is here The sting of death is sin and the sting of sin is death both meet in man to make him perfectly miserable Death could not have stung us no could not have been at all if it had not been for sin And sin though in it self extreamly heinous yet were not so dreadful and horrible if it were not attended with death How do we owe our selves to the mercy of a Saviour that hath freed us from the evil of both having pulled out the sting of death which is sin that it cannot hurt us and having taken such order with the sting of sin which is death that in stead of hurting it shall turn beneficial to us Lord into what a safe condition hast thou put us If neither sin nor death can hurt us what should we fear XXXIV How unjustly hath the presumption of blasphemous cavillers been wont to cast the envy of their condemnation meerly upon the absolute will of an unrespective power as if the damnation of the creature were onely of a supreame will not of a just merit the very name of Justice convinces them a punitive Justice cannot but suppose an offence It is not for us to rack the brains and strain the heart-strings of plain honest Christians with the subtilties of distinctions of a negative and positive reprobation of causes and consequences truths meet for the Schools It is enough that all Christian Divines the Synods both of Dort and Trent agree in this truth that never man is was can be miserable but for sin yea for his own sin The Prophet tells us so in terms Why is the living man sorrowful man suffereth for his sin Nothing can be more true then that of Bildad the Shuhite Behold God will not cast away a perfect man thy perdition is of thy self O Israel It is no less then rank blasphemy to make God the author of sin Thou art the God that hast no pleasure in wickedness neither shall any evil dwel with thee saith the Psalmist our sin is our own and the wages of sin is death he that doth the work earns the wages so then the righteous God is cleared both of our sin and our death onely his justice pays us what we will needs deserve Have I any pleasure at all saith he that the wicked should die and not that he should return from his ways and live wherefore return yea and live What a wretched thing is a willful sinner that will needs be guilty of his own death Nothing is more odious amongst men then for a man to be a felon of himself besides the forfeiture of his estate Christian burial is denied him and he is cast forth into the highway with a stake pitcht through his body so as every passenger that sees that woful monument is ready to say There lyes the carcass but where is the soul But so much more heinous is the self-felony of a wilful sinner because it is immediatly acted upon the soul and carries him with pleasure in the ways of an eternal death O Lord cleanse thou me from my secret faults keep thy servant also from presumptuous sins lest they get the dominion over me XXXV We are wont to say That we ought to give even the Devil his due and surely it is possible for us to wrong that malignant spirit in casting upon him those evils which are not properly his It is true that he is the tempter and both injects evil motions and draws them forth into act but yet all ill is not immediatly his we have enough besides of our own Every man saith
which her insulting rival might not see On the contrary there are many whom we pity as miserable that laugh in their sleeve and applaud themselves in their secret felicity and would be very loath to exchange conditions with those that commiserate them A ragged Cynick likes himself at least as well as a great Alexander The mortifyed Christian that knows both worlds looks with a kinde of contented scorn upon the proud gallant that contemns him as feeling that heaven within him which the other is not capable to believe It is no judging of mens real estate by their semblance nor valuing others worth by our own rate And for our selves if we have once laid sure grounds of our own inward contentment and happiness it matters not greatly if we be mis-known of the world XLI For one man to give titles to another is ordinary but for the great God to give titles to a poor wretched man is no less then wonderful Thus doth the Lord to Job There is none like him in the earth a perfect and upright man O what must he needs be in whom his maker glories Lo who would have looked for a Saint in so obscure a corner of the east and in so dark a time before ever the Law gave light to the world yet even then the land of UZ yields a Job no time no place can be any bar to an infinite mercy Even this while for ought I see the Sun shined more bright in Midian then in Goshen Gods election will be sure to finde out his own any where out of hell and if they could be there even there also Amongst all those idolatrous heathen Job is perfect and upright his religion and integrity is so much the more glorious because it is so ill neighbored as some rich Diamond is set off by a dark foyl O the infinite goodness of the Almighty that picks out some few grains out of the large chaff-heap of the world which he reserves for the granary of a blessed immortality It is not of him that willeth nor in him that runneth but of God that hath mercy We might well imagine that such a sprig must sprout out of the stock of faithful Abraham what other loyns were likely to yield so holy an issue And if his Sarah must be the mother of the promised seed yet why might he not also raise a blessed seed from Keturah The birth doth not always follow the belly even this second brood yields an heir of his fathers faith it is said That to the sons of the Concubines Abraham gave gifts and sent them away to the East Surely this son of the Concubine carries away as rich a legacy of his fathers grace as ever was enjoyed by the Son of the promise at home The gifts that Abraham gave to Midian were nothing to those gifts which the God of Abraham gives to this son of Midian who was perfect and upright one that feared God and eschued evil I perceive the holy and wise God meant to make this man a patern as of patience so of all heavenly vertues he could not be fit for that use if he were not exquisite and what can be wanting to that man of whom God holily boasts that he is Perfect And now what mettal is so fit to challenge the fire of affliction as this pure gold and who is so fit a match for the great Adversary as this Champion of God Never had he been put upon so hard a combat if God had not well known both the strength that he had given him and the happy success of his conflict little doth that good man know what wager is laid on his head but strongly incounters all his tryals The Sabeans have bereft him of his Oxen the Chaldees of his Camels the fire from Heaven of his sheep the tempest of his children Satan of his health and had not his wife been left to him for his greatest cross and his friends for his further tormentors I doubt whether they had escaped Lo there sits the great Potentate of the East naked and forlorn in the ashes as destitute of all comforts as full of painful boyls and botches scraping his loathsome hide with a potsheard yet even in that woful posture possessing his soul in patience maintaining his innocence justifying his Maker cheering himself in his Redeemer and happily triumphing over all his miseries and at last made the great miroir of divine bounty to all generations Now must Job pray for his freindly persecutors and is so high in favor with God that it is made an argument of extream wrath against Israel that though Noah Daniel and Job were in the land they should deliver none but their own souls O God this Saint could not have had this strength of invincible patience without thee thou that rewardest it in him didst bestow it upon him it is thy great mercy to crown thine owne works in us thy gifts are free thou canst fortifie even my weak soul with the same powers strengthen me with the same grace and impose what thou wilt XLII As it shall be once in glory so it is in grace there are degrees of it The Apostle that said of his auditors they have received the holy Ghost as well as we did not say they have received the holy Ghost as much as we We know the Apostles had so much as to give it to others none besides them could do so It is an happy thing to have any quantity of true sanctifiying grace at all every drop of water is water and every grain of gold is gold every measure of grace is precious But who is there that when he is dry would take up with one drop of liquor when he might have more or if covetously minded would sit down content with one dram of gold in such cases a little doth but draw on a desire of more it is strange to see that in all other commodities we desire a fulness If God give us fruit of our bodies it contents us not to have an imperfect childe but we wish it may have the full shape and proportion and when God hath answered us in that we do not rest in the integrity of parts but desire that it may attain to a fulness of understanding and of stature and then lastly to a fulness of age We would have full dishes full cups full cofers full barns a fulness of all things save the best of all which is the holy Ghost Any measure of spiritual grace contents us so as we are ready to say with Esau I have enough my brother There is a sinful kinde of contentation wherewith many fashionable Christians suffer themselves to be beguiled to the utter undoing of their souls for hereupon they grow utterly careless to get what they think they have already who cares to eat that is full cramed and by this means they live and die graceless for had they ever tasted how sweet the Lord is in the Graces of his
the way through the golden gates of honor or down to the mines of wealth or to the flowry garden of pleasure but the way of true peace he knows not he no more knows the way to Heaven then if there were none The fool saith the Psalmist hath said in his heart there is no God Did not the wicked man say so he durst not wilfully sin in the face of so mighty and dreadful an avenger Lastly the fool is apt to part with his patrimony for some gay toys and how ready is the carnal heart to cast away the Favor of God the inheritance of Heaven the salvation of his soul for these vain earthly trifles Holy men are wont to pass with the world for Gods fools alas how little do these censurers know to pass a true judgment of wisdom and folly he that was rapt into the third Heaven tells us That the foolishness of God is wiser then men and the weakness of God stronger then men but this we are sure of that wicked men are the devils fools and that judgments are prepared for scorners and stripes for the back of fools XLVII There are some things which are laudable in man but cannot be incident into God as a bashful shamefastness and holy fear And there are some dispositions blame-worthy in men which are yet in a right sence holily ascribed unto God as unchangeableness and irrepentance Attributes and qualities receive their limitations according to the meet subjects to which they belong with this sure rule That whatsoever may import an infinite purity and perfection we have reason to ascribe to our Maker whatever may argue infirmitie misery corruption we have reason to take to our selves Neither is it otherwise in the condition of men One mans vertue is anothers vice so boldness in a woman bashfulness in an old man bounty in a poor man parsimony in the great are as foully unbeseeming as boldness in a Soldier bashfulness in a childe bounty in the rich parsimony in the poor are justly commendable It is not enough for us to know what is good in it self but what is proper for us else we may be blemished with that which is anothers honor XLVIII It is easie to observe that there are five degrees of the digestion of our spiritual food First it is received into the cell of the ear and there digested by a careful attention then it is conveyed into the brain and there concocted by due meditation from thence it is sent down into the heart and there digested by the affections and from thence it is conveyed to the tongue in conference and holy confession and lastly it is thence transmitted to the hand and there receives perfect digestion in our action and performance And as the life and health of the body cannot be maintained except the material food pass through all the degrees of bodily concoction no more can the soul live and prosper in the want of any of these spiritual degrees of digestion And as where the food is perfectly concocted the body grows fat and vigorous so is it with the soul where the spiritual repast is thus kindly digested Were there not failings in all these degrees the souls of men would not be so meager and unthriving as they are Some there are that will not give so much as ear-room to the word of truth such are willing recusants others will admit it perhaps so far but there let it rest these are fashionable auditors some others can be content to let it enter into the brain and take up some place in their thoughts and memories these are speculative professors some but fewer others let it down into their hearts and there entertain it with secret liking but hide it in their bosomes not daring to make profession of it to the world these are close Nicodemians Others take it into their mouthes and busie their tongues in holy chat yet do nothing these are formal discoursers But alas how few are there whose hands speak louder then their tongues that conscionably hear meditate affect speak do the word of their Maker and Redeemer XLIX Men that are in the same condition speed not always alike Barabbas was a theif murderer seditionary and deserved hanging no less then the two theeves that were crucified with our Saviour yet he is dismissed and they executed And even of these two as our Saviour said of the two women grinding at the mill one was taken the other refused one went before Peter to paradise the other went before Judas into hell The providence and election of a God may make a difference we have no reason in the same crime to presume upon a contrary issue If that gracious hand shall exempt us from the common judgment of our consorts in evil we have cause 〈◊〉 less his mercy but if his just hand shall sweep us away in the company of our wicked consociates we have reason to thank none but our selves for our sufferings L. How sweet a thing is revenge to us naturally even the very infant rejoyces to see him beaten that hath angerd him and is ready with his little hand to give that sroke to the by-stander which he would have with more force returned to the offender and how many have we known in mortal quarrels cheerfully bleeding out their last drop when they have seen their enemy gasping and dying before them This alone shews how much there is remaining in our bosome of the sting of that old Serpent who was a murderer from the beginning delighting in death and enjoying our torment whereas on the contrary true grace is merciful ready to forgive apt to return good for evil to pray for our persecutors Nothing doth more clearly evince what spirit we are of then our disposition in wrongs received The carnal heart breathes nothing but revenge and is straight wringing the sword out of the hands of him that hath said Vengeance is mine The regenerate soul contrarily gives place to wrath and puts on the bowels of mercies kindness humbleness of minde meekness long suffering forbearing forgiving and will not be overcome with evil but overcomes evil with good We have so much of God as we can remit injuries so much of Satan as we would revenge them LI. It is worth observing how nature hath taught all living creatures to be their own physitians The same power that gave them a being hath led them to the means of their own preservation No Indian is so savage but that he knows the use of his Tobacco and Contra-yerva yea even the brute creatures are bred with this skill The Dog when he is stomack-sick can go right to his proper Grass the Cat to her Nep the Goat to his Hemlock the Weasel to Rue the Hart to Dittany the sick Lyon can cure himself with an Ape the Monkey with a Spider the Bear with an Ant-heap the Panther with mans dung and the Stork is said to have taught man the
any calamity that may befal them in their estates children husbands wives friends so as they can say with Solomons drunkard They have stricken me and I was not sick they have beaten me but I felt it not These are dead flesh which do no more feel the knife then if it did not at all enter for whom some corrosives are necessary to make them capable of smart This disposition though it seem to carry a face of Fortitude and Patience yet is justly offensive and not a little injurious both to God and the soul To God whom it indeavors to frustrate of those holy ends which he proposeth to himself in our sufferings for wherefore doth he afflict us if he would not have us afflicted wherefore doth the father whip the childe but that he would have him smart and by smarting bettered he looks for cryes and tears and the childe that weeps not under the rod is held graceless To the soul whom it robs of the benefit of our suffering for what use can there be of patience where there is no sence of evil and how can patience have its perfect work where it is not Betwixt both these extreams if we would have our souls prosper a mid-disposition must be attained we must be so sensible of evils that we be not stupified with them and so reâ—olute under our crosses that we may be truly sensible of them not so brawned under the rod that we should not feel it nor yet so tender that we should over-feel it not more patient under the stripe then willing to kiss the hand that inflicts it LXIV God as he is one so he loves singleness and simplicity in the inward parts as therefore he hath been pleased to give us those sences double whereby we might let in for our selves as our eyes and ears and those limbs double whereby we might act for our selves as our hands and feet so those which he would appropriate to himself as our hearts for beleef and our tongue for confession he hath given us single neither did he ever ordain or can abide two hearts in a bosome two tongues in one mouth It is then the hateful stile which the Spirit of God gives to an hypocrite that he is double-minded In the language of Gods Spirit a fool hath no heart and a dissembler hath an heart and an heart and surely as a man that hath two heads is a monster in nature so he that hath two hearts is no less a spiritual monster to God For the holy and wise God hath made one for one One minde or soul for one body And if the regenerate man have two men in one the old man and the new yet it is so as that one is flesh the other spirit the minde then is not double but the law of the mind is opposed to the law of the flesh so as here are strivings in one heart not the sidings of two for surely the God of unity can neither indure multiplication nor division of hearts in one brest If then we have one heart for God another for Mammon we may be sure God will not own this latter how should he for he made it not Yea most justly will he disclaim both since that which he made was but one this double And as the wise man hath told us That God hates nothing which he hath made so may we truly say God hateth whatsoever he made not since what he made not is onely evil When I have done my best I shall have but a weak and a faulty heart but Lord let it be but a single one Search me O God and know my heart try me and know my thoughts and see if there be any wicked way in me and lead me in the way everlasting LXV There is a kinde of not-being in sin for sin is not an existence of somewhat that is but a deficiency of that rectitude which should be it is a privation but not without a real mischief as blindness is but a privation of sight but a true misery Now a privation cannot stand alone it must have some subject to lean upon there is no blindness but where there is an eye no death but where there hath been a life sin therefore supposes a soul wherein it is and an act whereto it cleaveth and those acts of sin are they which the Apostle calls the works of darkness So as there is a kinde of operosity in sin in regard whereof sinners are stiled The workers of iniquity And surely there are sins wherein there is more toyl and labor then in the holiest actions What pains and care doth the theef take in setting his match in watching for his prey How doth he spend the darkest and coldest nights in the execution of his plot What fears what flights what hazards what shifts are here to avoyd notice and punishment The adulterer says That stoln waters are sweet but that sweet is sauced to him with many careful thoughts with many deadly dangers The superstitious bygot who is himself besotted with error how doth he traverse Sea and land to make a Proselyte What adventures doth he make what perils doth he run what deaths doth he challenge to mar a soul So as some men take more pains to go to Hell then some others do to go to Heaven O the sottishness of sinners that with a temporary misery will needs purchase an eternal How should we think no pains sufficient for the attaining of Heaven when we see wretched men toyl so much for damnation LXVI With what elegance and force doth the holy Ghost express our Saviours leaving of the world which he cals his taking home again or his receiving up In the former implying That the Son of God was for the time sent out of his Fathers house to these lower regions of his exile or pilgrimage and was now re-admitted into those his glorious mansions In the latter so intimating his triumphant ascension that he passeth over his bitter passion Surely he was to take death in his way so he told his Disciples in the walk to Emaus Ought not Christ to suffer these things and to enter into his glory He must be lifted up to the Cross ere his Ascension to Heaven but as if the thought of death were swallowed up in the blessed issue of his death here is no mention of ought but his assumption Lo death truly swallowed up in victory Neither is it otherwise proportionally with us wholly so it cannot be for as for him Death did but taste of him could not devour him much less put him over It could not but yield him whole entire the third day without any impairing of his nature yea with an happy addition to it of a glorious immortality and in that glorified humanity he ascended by his own Power into his Heaven For us we must be content that one part of us lye rotting for the time in the dust whiles our spiritual part shall
freely enjoy his presence but of those straglers who care not to live without God so they may be befriended by Mammon How ill a match these poor men make for themselves I send them to their Saviour to learn What is a man profited if he shall gain the whole world and lose his own soul or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul God forbid I should give their souls for lost but I must say they are hazarded for herein doubtless they tempt God who hath not promised to keep them in any other then their just wayes and they do in a sort tempt and challenge Satan to draw them on either to a love of error and impiety or at least to a cooling of their care and love of truth How unlike are these men to that wise merchant in the Gospel He sold all that he had to buy the pearl of great price they sell the pearl to buy a little worthless merchandize As the greatest part of their trafick stands upon exchange so I heartily wish they would make this one exchange more of less care of their wealth for more care of their souls LXXXVIII Even when Joseph was a great lord in Egypt second to none but Pharaoh and had the command of that richest countrey of the world yet then his old Father Jacob thought his poor parcel of Shechem worthy to be bequeathed to him and embraced of him as a noble patrimony because it was in the promised land and the legacy of a dying Father How justly do I admire the faith both of the father and son in this donation Jacob was now in Goshen Shechem was in Canaan neither was the father now in the present possession nor were the sons in some ages to enjoy it It was four hundred and thirty years that Israel must be a sojourner in a strange countrey ere they shall enter into the promised Land yet now as foreseeing the future possession which his posterity should take of this spot of earth so long after Jacob gives Shechem to Joseph and Joseph apprehends it as a rich blessing as the double portion of the divided primogeniture Infidelity is purblinde and can see nothing but that which is hard at hand Faith is quick-sighted and discerns the events of many centuries of years yea of ages to come Abraham saw his Saviours day and rejoyced to see it a thousand nine hundred and fourty years off and Adam before him almost four thousand years As to God all things are present even future so to those that by a lively faith partake of him Why do I not by that faith see my Saviour returning in his Heavenly magnificence as truly as now I see the Heaven whence he shall come and my body as verily raised from the dust and become glorious as now I see it weak and decrepit and falling into the dust LXXXIX True knowledg causeth appetite and desire For the will follows the understanding whatsoever that apprehends to be good for us the affective part inclines to it No man can have any regard to an unknown good If an hungry man did not know that food would refresh and nourish him or the thirsty that drink would satisfie him or the naked that fire would warm him or the sick that Physick would recover him none of these would affect these succors And according to our apprehension of the goodness and use of these helps so is our appetite towards them For the object of the will is a known good either true or appearing so And if our experience can tell us of some that can say with her in the Poet I see and approve better things but follow the worse It is not for that evil as evil much less as worse can fall into the will but that their appetite over-carries them to a misconceit of a particular good so as howsoever in a generality they do confusedly assent to the goodness of some holy act or object yet upon the present occasion here and now as the School speaketh their sensitive appetite hath prevailed to draw them to a perswasion that this pleasure or that profit is worthy to be imbraced Like as our first parents had a general apprehension that it was good to obey all the commands of their Creator but when it came to the forbidden fruit now their eye and their ear and their heart tell them it is good for them both for pleasure and for the gain of knowledg to taste of that forbidden tree So then the miscarriage is not in that they affect that which they think not to be good but in that they think that to be good which is not for alass for one true good there are many seeming which delude the soul with a fair semblance As a man in a generality esteems silver above brass but when he meets with a rusty piece of silver and a cleer piece of brass he chooses rather the clear brass then the silver defaced with rust Surely it is our ignorance that is guilty of our cool neglect of our spiritual good if we did know how sweet the Lord is in his sure promises in his unfailing mercies we could not but long after him and remain unsatisfied till we finde him ours would God be pleased to shine in our hearts by the light of the true knowledg of himself we could not have cause to complain of want of heat in our affections towards his infinite goodness Did we but know how sweet and delectable Christ the Heavenly Manna is we could not but hunger after him and we could not hunger and not be satisfied and in being satisfied blessed XC Those which we mis-cal goods are but in their nature indifferent and are either good or evil as they are affected as they are used Indeed all their malignity or vertue is in the minde in the hand of the possessor Riches ill got ill kept ill spent are but the Mammon of iniquity but if well The Crown of the wise is their riches How can it be amiss to have much when he that was the richest man of the East was the holiest Yea when God himself is justly stiled the possessor of Heaven and Earth How can it be amiss to have little when our Saviour sayes Blessed are ye poor And if from that divine mouth we hear a wo to the rich himself interprets it of them that trust in riches If our riches possess us in stead of our possessing them we have changed our God and lost our selves but if we have learnt to use our wealth and not enjoy it we may be no less gracious then rich If a rich man have a large and humble heart and a just hand he inherits the blessing of the poor If a poor man have a proud heart and a theevish hand he carryes away the wo from the rich Riches saith wise Solomon make themselves wings they fly away as an Eagle towards Heaven So as we may use
with me Dispose of me as thou wilt Only make me faithfull in all thy services resolute to trust my self with thee in all events carefull to be approved of thee in all my waies and crown my decayed age with such fruits as may be pleasing to thee and available to the good of many Lastly let me live to thee and die in thee IX How oft Lord have I wondred to see the strange carriage of thine administration of these earthly affaires and therein to see thy marvailous wisdome power goodness in fetching good out of evill Alas we wretched men are apt enough to fetch the worst of evils out of the greatest good turning the grace of thee our God into wantonnesse but how have I seen thee of liveless stones to raise up children to Abraham of sinners to make Saints out of a desperate confusion to fetch order out of a bloudy war an happy peace out of resolutions of revenge love out of the rock water out of a persecuter an Apostle How can I be discouraged with unlikelihoods when I see thee work by contraries It is not for me O my God to examine or pre-judge thy counsailes take what waies thou wilt so thou bring me to thine own end all paths shall be direct that shall leade me to blessedness X. How many good purposes O my God have I taken up let fall to the ground again without effect how teeming hath this barren womb of my heart been of false conceptions but especially when thy hand hath been smart and heavy upon me in mine affliction how have I tasked my self with duties and revived my firme resolutions of more strict obedience which yet upon the continuance of my better condition I have slackened Lord it is from thee that I purposed well it is from my own sinfull weakness that I failed in my performances If any good come me the will and the deed must be both thine The very preparations of the heart are from thee and if I have devised my way it must be thou that directest my steps O God do thou ripen and perfect all the good motions that thou puttest into my soul and make my health but such as my sickness promised XI Every man Lord is unwilling that his name should dye we are all naturally ambitious of being thought on when we are gone those that have not living monuments to perpetuate them affect to have dead if Absolon have not a son he will yet erect a pillar yet when we have all done time eates us out at the last There is no remembrance of the wise more then of the foole for ever seeing that which now is in the daies to come shall all be forgotten O God let it be my care and ambition what ever become of my memory here below that my name may be recorded in Heaven XII Thy wise providence O God hath so ordered it that every mans minde seeks and findes contentment in some thing otherwise it could not be since we must meet with so frequent crosses in the world but that mans life would be burdensome to him one takes pleasure in his hauke or hound another in his horses and furnitures one in fair buildings another in pleasant walks and beautiful gardens one in travailing abroad another in the enioying of the profits and pleasures of his home one in the increase of his wealth another in the titles of his honor one in a comfortable wife another in loving and dutiful children but when all is done if there be not somwhat els to uphold the heart in the evil day it must sink O God do thou possesse my soul of thee let me place all my felicity in the fruition of thine infinite goodness so I am sure the worst of the world hath not power to render me other then happy XIII O Lord God under how opposite aspects do I stand from the world how variously am I construed by men One pities my condition another praises my patience One favors mee out of the opinion of some good that he thinks he sees in mee another dislikes me for some imagined evil What are the eyes or tongues of men to mee Let me not know what they say or think of me and what am I the better or worse for them they can have no influence upon me without my own apprehension All is in what termes I stand with thee my God if thou be pleased to look upon me with the eye of thy tender mercy and compassion What care I to be unjustly brow-beaten of the world If I may be blessed with thy favour let me be made a gazing-stock to the world to Angels and to men XIV Speak Lord for thy servant heareth What is it which thou wouldst have me do that I may finde rest to my soul I am willing to exercise my self in all the acts of piety which thou requirest I am ready to fast to pray to read to hear to meditate to communicate to give alms to exhort admonish reprove comfort where thou bid'st me and if there be any other duty appertaining to devotion or mercy let me serve thee in it But alas O my God howsoever I know these works are in themselves well-pleasing unto thee yet as they fall from my wretchedness they are stained with so many imperfections that I have more reason to crave pardon for them then to put confidence in them and if I could performe them never so exquisitely yet one sin is more then enough to dash all my obedience I see then O Lord I well see there is no act that I can be capable to do unto thee wherein I can finde any repose it must be thine act to me which only can effect it It is thy gracious word Come unto me all ye that labour and are heavy laden and I will give you rest Lo this rest must be thy gift not my earning and what can be freer then gift Thou givest it then but to those that come to thee not to those that come not To those that come to thee laden and labouring under the sense of their own wretchedness not to the proud and careless O Saviour thy sinner is sufficiently laden with the burden of his iniquities lade thou me yet more with true penitent sorrow for my sins and inable me then to come unto thee by a lively faith Take thou the praise of thine own work Give me the grace to come and give me rest in coming XV. O blessed Saviour What strange variety of conceits do I finde concerning thy thousand years raign What riddles are in that prophesie which no humane tongue can aread where to fix the begining of that marvailous millenary and where the end and what manner of raign it shall be whether temporal or spiritual on earth or in heaven undergoes as many constructions as there are pens that have undertaken it and yet when all is done I see thine Apostle speaks onely of the souls of thy martyrs raigning
but sometimes I am foyled and go halting out of the field it is thy mercy that I live being so fiercely assaulted by those principalities and powers it were more then wonder if I should escape such hands without a wound Even that holy servant of thine who strove with thine Angel for a blessing went limping away though he prevailed what mervail is it that so weak a wretch as I striving with many evill Angels for the avoidance of a curse come off with a maime or a scar But blessed be thy name the wounds that I receive are not mortall and when I fall it is but to my knees whence I rise with new courage and hopes of victory Thou who art the God of all power and keepest the keys of hell and death hast said Resist the Devill and he will flee from you Lord I do and will by thy merciful ayd still and ever resist make thou my faith as stedfast as my will is resolute Oh still teach thou my hands to war and my fingers to fight arme thou my soul with strength and at last according to thy gracious promise crown it with victory XXIII Oh Lord God how ambitious how covetous of knowledg is this soul of mine as the eye is not satisfied with seeing nor the eare filled with hearing no more is the mind of man with understanding yea so insatiable is my heart that the more I know the more I desire to know and the less I think I know Under heaven there can be no bounds set to this intellectuall appetite O do thou stop the mouth of my soul with thy self who art infinite Whom have I in heaven but thee and there is none upon earth that I desire besides thee Alas Lord if I could know all creatures with all their forms qualities workings if I could know as much as innocent Adam or wise Solomon Yea more if I could know all that is done in earth or heaven what were my soul the better if it have not attained the knowledg of thee Since as the Preacher hath most wisely observed In much wisdome is much grief and he that increaseth knowledg increaseth sorrow Oh then set off my heart from affecting that knowledg whose end is sorrow and fix it upon that knowledg which brings eeverlasting life And this is life eternal to know thee the only true God and Jesus Christ whom thou hast sent XXIV O my God what miserable uncertainties there are in these worldly hopes But yesterday I made account of an eminent advantage of my estate which now ends in a deep loss How did we lately feed our selves with the hope of a firme and during peace which now shuts up in too much bloud How confidently did I relie upon the promised favour of some great friends which now leave me in the suds as the scorn of a mis-called fortune In how slippery places O Lord do our feet stand If that may be said to stand which is ever sliding never fixed And not more slippery then brittle so as there is not more danger of falling then of sinking With thee O God with thee only is a constant immutability of happiness There let me seek it there let me finde it and over-looking all the fickle objects of this vain world let my soul pitch it self upon that blessed immortality which ere long it hopes to enjoy with thee XXV Lord God What a wearisome circle do I walk in here below I sleep and dress and work and eat and work again and eat again and undress and sleep again and thus wearing out my time finde a satiety in all these troublesome Lord when shall I come to that state wherein I shall do nothing but injoy thee do nothing but praise thee and in that one work shall finde such infinite contentment that my glorified soul cannot wish to do any other and shall therein alone bestow a blessed eternity XXVI O God how troublesome and painful do I find this Sun of thine whose scorching beams beat upon my head and yet this excellent creature of thine is that to which under thee we are beholden for our very life and it is thy great blessing to the earth that it may enjoy these strong and forceable rayes from it Oh Who shall be able to endure the burning flames of thy wrath which thou intendest for the punishment and everlasting torment of thine enemies And if men shall blaspheme the name of thee the God of heaven for the great heat of that beneficiall creature what shall we think they will do for that fire which shall be consuming them to all eternity Lord keep my soul from those flames which shall be ever burning and never either quenched or abated XXVII Which way O Lord which way can I look and not see some sad examples of misery One wants his limbs with Mephibosheth another his sight with Bartimeus a third with Lazarus wants bread and a whole skin One is pained in his body another plundred of his estate a third troubled in minde one is pined in prison another tortured on the rack a third languisheth under the loss of a deare son or wife or husband Who am I Lord that for the present I enjoy an immunity from all these sorrows I am sure none grones under them that hath deserved them more It is thy mercy thy meer mercy O my good God that any of these calamities have faln beside me Oh make me truly thankful for thine infinite goodness and yet onely so sensible of thy gracious indulgence this way as that when any of these evils shall seize upon mee I may be no more dejected in the sense of them then I am now over-joyed with the favor of their forbearance XXVIII O blessed God what variety of gifts hast thou scattered amongst the sons of men To one thou hast given vigor of body to another agility beauty to a third to one depth of judgment to another quickness of apprehension to one readiness and rarity of invention to another tenacity of memorie to one the knowledg of liberal arts to another the exquisiteness of manuary skill to one worldly wealth to another honour to one a wise heart to another an eloquent tongue to one more then enough to another contentment with a little to one valour to another sagacity These favors O Lord thou hast promiscuously dispersed amongst both thy friends and enemies but oh how transcendent are those spiritual mercies which thou hast reserved for thine own the graces of heavenly wisdome lively faith fervent charity firme hope joy in the holy Ghost and all the rest of that divine beauye For any competency of the least of thy common blessings I desire to be thankful to thy bounty for which of them O God can I either merit or requite but oh for a soul truly and eagarly ambitious of those thy best mercies Oh let me ever long for them and ever be insatiable of them Oh do thou fill my heart