assented to vanitie and so quicklie forsaken thee which art the truth Oah how greatlie haue I sinned euen in this that I haue not sticken to thee alone neglecting all things else For I was made to loue and to enioie thee but by following after creatures inordinatelie I haue lost thee and found no rest for mine hart in them neither But turne mee vnto thee ô Lord and leaue me not in earthlie things thou which hast vouchsafed to promise celestiall things to such as folowe thee CHAP. 10. 1. A comparison betweene earthlie and heauenlie ioies 2. with a praier for grace to contemne this transitorie world MY soule hath refused comfort Wander thou not after deceiptfull vanities madnes ô my soule but turne vnto the Lord thy God for hee is the fountaine of all comfort Whatsoeuer thou seekest either among men or among creatures thou shalt leese it and shalt well perceaue it to perish For though I graunt theie maie yeeld some showe of comfort yet sure I am nothing dooth continue Whie so vanelie wilt thou bee deceaued It is egregious follie to beg of a begger when he that is rich will giue abundantlie Euerie creature is but poore to minister comfort vnto vs but God which is rich in mercie giueth to all men liberallie and reprocheth no man if thou for thy part diligentlie doo seeke and patientlie expect his leisure Returne ô my Soule returne downe vnto Noah in the arke euen vnto Christ in thine heart because it is not good to abide long abroade See thou refuse outward comfort if inwardlie thou wilt be refreshed Doo not thou with the crowe abide without the arke but with speede auoide the carcase Returne thou an hungred and Christ so will feede thee with the bread of life If vrgent necessitie or weakenes hold thee abroade take heed thou make no staie but with speede get thee home least thou be either ouerwhelmed with the flud of words or comprehended in the snares of diuelish tentation Manie traps are laid for the wandering soule and great safetie hath the quick returning dooue which not finding where to set her foote made haste to come back vnto Noah in the ship Go thou therefore vnto thy secret place and abide there yea let it bee a griefe for thee to bee else-where Oah blessed is the soule which hath a cleare conscience before God and is not delighted with anie vane thing which is neither polluted with louing anie thing nor wearied with extremelie hating anie man Blessed is the soule that seeketh no comfort of creatures but fixeth all her hope in the Lord Blessed is the soule which refuseth all outward and temporall quietnes and whatsoeuer belongeth vnto the welfare of the bodie and which for the loue of Christ dooth willinglie embrace both paine and pouertie Blessed is the soule which commendeth her selfe to God that hee maie doo with her euen as hee thinketh good Blessed is the soule which at no time seeketh her owne glorie which desireth at no time to haue her owne will doon but continuallie mindeth loueth and preferreth the glorie and will of God aboue all things Blessed is the soule which dooth esâ—ange her selfe from whatsoeuer is temporall and keepeth her selfe pure and vndefiled before God in all her dealings O reioice and be thou much glad thou which art such a soule for thou maist abide in secret and celestiall cogitations and so magnifie the Lord daie and night Blessed and blessed againe is the soule whose desires are to heauen-ward whose hands and armes are out-stretched euen as the two wings of the Cherubims whose eies are pure to behold God whose inward power and strength dooth goe altogether and ascend and returneth not vntill it haue him whome onlie she loueth before all things And when she hath found him she foloweth him whether soeuer hee will haue her And when he speaketh he reioiceth to heare her make answere saieng I am thine onlie beloued of thee elected I am thine exceeding great reward Bee thou neither proude in prosperitie nor impatient in aduersitie Consider how theie which loue mee are comforted of mee How sweetelie thinkest thou I will entreate them when theie shall be receaued vnto the eternall rest after that the troobles of the bodie and soule are laide aside Oah that I enioied such pleasure as dooth the holie soule when the senses beeing asleepe shee is carried aloft and eleuated aboue her selfe beloued and coopled to God by the bonde of most hartie frendship O my God which art the treasure of mine heart thou knowest right well how this would bee the onlie comfort of mine inward griefe But thou art the geuer and the pourer in of this ointment Thou teachest thou exhortest thou cherishest thou comfortest thou carriest thou vpholdest thou guidest out and bringest back thou doost with the soule whome thou hast chosen euen as thou wilt and whatsoeuer thou doost and wilt it is all good But I who am as a sowre vessell altogether vnworthie to receaue th'infusion of thy good spirit doo humblie craue that plentifullie it maie so spout forth vpon mee that I maie both taste the sweetenes of thine inward loue and also perceaue those sacred pleasures the which I doubt not the religious soule dooth feele by thy grace I did smell the celestiall perfumes a far off when I did meditate certaine inward cogitations of the minde concerning the soule but Lord thou knowest how sildome how litle I doo thinke of eternall things how often words doo wither how rude the vnderstanding how vnquiet the conscience how my hart is troobled darkened and irreligious and onlie through mine owne default Notwithstanding sometime seeking a waie vnto spirituall matters hauing taken my cogitations with mee in secret I begin seriouslie to call into my remembrance the good things of the blessed soule how great are the celestiall ioies and spirituall delightes which are in her heart what peace what tranquilitie what hope and reioicing in God her Sauiour whose words be sweete and face bewtifull And these cogitations though short theie endure yet when theie come blessed is the houre And I thus thinking and thou enlightening my darkenes I doo finde iust complaints vpon my selfe and by priuie holes of grace I perceaue how such and such is the soule inwardlie vnited vnto thee and thaâ— so and so thou hast spoken to her She is still from all things sensible and thou in the spirit speakest to her of inuisible matters She seemeth as it were to be forsaken of all creatures and after an vnspeakeable manner thou doost comfort her So that I said againe in mine hart wo to the sinfull soule to the grieued conscience to the man which is neither hote nor colde destitute of the light of grace and of spirituall comfort seeking teares and yet finding none But peace be to him which vnfeinedlie dooth loue Christ
Soliloquium Animae The sole-talke of the Soule Or A spirituall and heauenlie Dialogue betwixt the Soule of Man and GOD. Which for the great affinitie it hath with other bookes of the Auctor published heeretofore in our natiue tongue is now entituled The fourth booke of the Imitation of Christ. Translated and corrected by THOMAS ROGERS Neuer before published ¶ At London Printed And are to be solde in the Royall Exchange at the Shop of Andrew Maunsell 1592. To the Christian Reader BEing much and earnestlie requested heere-vnto I haue published in our vulgar tongue another of Malleolus alià s Thom. de Kempis or Kempisius workes not that I confesse which of some well weening though not so well deeming persons was commended vnto mee I meane that in the old English translation and in some Latine copies too called The fourth Booke of the Imitation of Christe which in deede is altogether De sacramento altaris and so entitled but the next to that in Kempisius workes namelie the Soliloquium animae This I haue tearmed for the great affinitie it hath with the bookes of Kempisius by mee heeretofore diuulged The fourth booke of the Imitation of Christ. In the dooing whereof I haue as little as might bee varied froÌ„ the auctors words and phrazes and no where from the sense but where himselfe hath varied from the truth of God and I doubt not would haue redressed had hee liued in these daies of light as he did in the time of most palpable blindnes And this haue I doon with the greater alacritie because I finde and thou maist reade it also in the Auctors owne Preface that hee not onlie doubted that hee might vtter some things both fonde and offensiue but also wished to haue some godlie corrector of his faultes and praied vnto almightie God gratiouslie to reueale such thinges offensiue either vnto himselfe or vnto some other Whose godlie praier God hath heard and discouered those things for thy benefit and testification besides howe Kempisius the Auctor howsoeuer liuing in a Popish time was yet in hart no Papist but would like well of that which is doon as I trust thou wilt whose aedifieng and spirituall comforting I haue onlie aimed at And reaping this comfort to thy soule by the reading or hearing of this treatise bee thankefull vnto thy God that giueth thee some taste of the caelestiall ioies in this miserable and all-trooblesome world to whose gratious protection I doo most humblie commend thee and my selfe The Aucthors Preface I Haue gathered together into a little booke for my comfort sake certaine deuoute sentences the better so to commit them to memorie I haue also disposed them as into a plesant orchard set out with all sorts of trees and bewtified with al varieties of goodlie flowres where-into I might now and then enter both for to chuse and behold at my neede such matter as my hart desires for the refreshing of the minde grieued at anie time and ouerwhelmed with pensiuenes Now the more cleerlie and readilie to finde vnder which arbor I might repose my selfe or which floure were best to be culled out I haue made the heads of euery Chapter to glitter as it were with red titles I haue likewise with varietie of words as nowe talking nowe reasoning praieng nowe nowe conferring now in mine owne now in another mans person bewreathed about the text with a sweete and delightsome stile Wherefore I entreate them whosoeuer shall reade it first that they be not moued with indignation at that which the writer hath doon for it was his minde wholie to talke with his God Next that theie wil pardon the imperfectioÌ„ and plainnes of the stile considering that God is more delighted with words that be simple and pure than with those that be artificiall And if happelie the sense in anie place appeare either not sounde or not cleere enough my desire is to haue a godlie corrector of the same telling him withall that what fonde matter soeuer he shall espie it hath escaped from me not of purpose but rather for that I was not heedie enough in marking what I writ Moreouer forasmuch as man in that iudgement of his which is most probable maie be deceaued vnto thee ô God almightie and father of lightes doo I thine humble disciple make recourse and this Sole-talke of mine doo present before thy diuine Maiestie to the ende that thou maist both approue the things well said and disproue what is doon amisse and insinuate also either into my selfe or some other faithfull seruaut of thine more rightlie to obserue whatsoeuer things are offensiue My request is also holie Father that I thy poore seruant may obtaine at thy hands both time and space to abide in the all plentifull pastures of the Scriptures which be and shall be my chiefest comfort vntill that daie of aeternitie appeere and the shadowe of mortalitie doo decline awaie And therefore withdrawe thou fro me all vnprofitable cares worldlie desires hurtfull affections and what else may hinder mee fro my desired leisure For he must haue a free minde and a quiet that would meditate of hidden and heauenlie matters Wherefore that I maie be worthie to attaine my sute vouchsafe thou my God to endue and fill me with the grace of thine heauenlie ioie that I maie speake to thy glorie and to some comfort of my owne soule The fourth Booke of the Imitation of Christ. CHAPTER 1. 1. A longing of the soule after God 2. The incomprehensible maiestie of the Lord. 3. An exhortation to the loue of God SOVLE AS for mee it is good to drawe neere vnto God O short and ô sweete saieng embracing God and abandoning the vniuersall world What more can be said And what more-ouer is to be desired Would it not suffice if that were performed which now is spoken And were other yea many other things vttered should not all in the end be reduced vnto this one thing Therefore my soule saie thou with the Prophet As for mee it is good to drawe neere vnto God O my God thou art mine onlie felicitie thou alone art good and sweet vnto mee To speake of thee it delighteth the louer to thinke of thee it liketh the religious whose hart is not fixed vpon the world but hidden with thee in the heauens to the end that both thou alone maiest be his true peace and inmost ioie and he not vexed dailie in this world where false concupiscence doth prouoke vnto sin O my God how is hee affected which is inflamed with thy loue How doth hee reioice that hath no pleasure in anie vaine creature Are not these the words of such a man in that Psalme whereout the beginning of my speech was taken euen these his words Whome haue Iâ—in heauen but thee and I haue desired none in the earth with thee MAN O holie soule ô zealous soule so longing after God! What is that I heare what is that thou saiest Are the
that Manna is come downe from heauen And hee which ministreth true bread from heauen doth giue also a good vnderstanding to the taster that hee maie knowe how euerie good giuing and euerie gift is from aboue and commeth downe from the father of lightes This word now saith hee is from God Without him there is nothing I haue all things from him Furthermore this spirituall man hee woondereth and lamenteth that hee so lightlie esteemeth so excellent a good thing by the which hee is not a little blessed and whie also he dooth not oftener bend his heart to heare and to see that than the which nothing is more sweete and blessed to be desired And would to God hence-forth I might thus doo For this exceedinglie dooth delight mee and more will delight mee the more I giue my selfe vnto these meditations Oah that my beloued would come into mine heart that I might taste the sweetnes of his apples Oah that hee would decline vnto mee and showe himselfe to mee and mee to himselfe Hee is my felicitie and mine onlie delight Now begin I to couet and desire and greatlie to loue this good thing in whome all good things are this ioie in whome is all ioie this one thing in whome are all things small and great base and hie yet nothing created but without all conceipt of man the beginning and the ende of all the good things which hee hath formed Hence it is that now and then I would thoroughlie bee replenished with this good thing and filled with that so heauenlie ioie and I couet after a sort euen to be swallowed vp and consumed vtterlie of him that mine insatiable desire might once be satisfied in such sort that nothing in mee might bee mine but his onlie whose the fire and heate of loue is whose this woonderfull worke is also that so I might the more greedilie be carried to himâ—ward and be made one spirit together with him Notwithstanding all this doth not puffe vp the godlie man or make him to thinke himselfe some-what or to despise others or to iudge inferiors for hee knoweth that whatsoeuer hee hath commeth not of himselfe but it is the free gift of God that thereby hee is not to waxe proude when hee perceaueth himselfe to be so comforted of the Lord. For hee seeketh not the praise of man he careth not for foraine fauor but hee seeketh the beloued his praise and his fauor hee onlie desireth in whome hee hath all things and shall finde more than all these things because hee preferreth his loue his sweetenes and the ioiefull enioieng of him before all transitorie things and his honor hee seeketh and sigheth for aboue all things else And therefore he cannot be proude nor boast of anie thing God hee is his glorie his praise and his comfort God euen hee is his true and perfect ioie his soueraigne and sole happines all his desire and perfection And which more is hee would haue others also thus to reioice with him and to enioie such felicitie without ende both in this world and in heauen too For this is his desire and praier that God would reueale himselfe to all men and that hee would vouchsafe to conuert and drawe all vnto him that he alone might be praised and glorified for hee is both loue it selfe and such a fountaine of loue as neuer can be drawen drie For hee dooth more loue all men than all men set together can loue him Notwithstanding it liketh him well if anie man haue a desire to loue him from the botome although hee cannot sounde vnto the depth For hee in louing deuoureth vanquisheth and surpasseth all CHAP. 9. A desire of the Soule that no earthlie creature maie carrie her awaie vnto vanitie BEhold I would take my flight far off and lodge in the mountaines Oah how profitable how sweete and how ioiefull a thing is it to sit solitarilie in silence to talke with God and to enioie the onlie good thing in which are all good things Would to God I were so conioined to that all simple and onlie good thing that I might be moued with none affections and distractions of transitorie things nor curiouslie fasten mine eies vpon anie creature and visible thing O wretched man that I am who shall deliuer from the bodie of this death Alas how often dieth my soule for the creatures which she loueth oah manie times she forgetteth her creator and is carried awaie for their sakes Mine vnstable minde now willeth this thing now that thing now it is heere now there seeking but not finding rest in creatures because there is no creature which can yeeld full satietie to be enioied though it hath some delectation for vse The heart of man is vnsearchable and who can knowe it O Lord thou knowest the thoughts of men that they are vane O eternall God most hie and infinite the creator and gouernor of all things I am thy creature which thou hast made by thy power Thou hast made mee that I should loue thee and gladlie would I loue thee but I cannot as I would For I am fettered with vane loue and with clammie affections of transitorie things from which while I would rid my selfe hardlie or not at all can I so doo without great paine Oah how soone would theie flie and perish if thou Christ wert sweet and didest â—auor in my nostrels Notwithstanding sometime through the sight of the minde I doo behold thine inuisible things by the creation of the world and thee also the soueraigne felicitie the true and eternall God And gladlie would I continue in these meditations but forthwith I knowe not with what winde I am blowen awaie from them and helde downe like a miser by the loue and waight of visible things Behold I firmelie doo purpose in mine hart as it were making a couenant betweene mee and thee that for thy noble and pretious loue I will neither loue nor looke vpon anie creature but will contemne all things yea my selfe and all mine but straight-waie worldlie fleshlie and familiar cogitations doo ascend into mine heart as though in them were a certaine felicitie and as though if I contemned them I were to forgo some great good thing and these beare a good countenance but they hide the wofull ende showing what is present but hiding the inconuenience that will ensue as though euerie-where and in all creatures thou art to be sought and that nothing were to be neglected or despised which hath bin made of my God and thus they withdrawe mee oftentimes fro my purpose and at the length vtterlie seduce mee Oah how vane and deceiptfull and almost nothing are thinges which now stand and florish proued to bee which flieng awaie after their sudden ioies doo leaue mee among the thornes and briars of a guiltie conscience But woe is mee Lord yea woe againe to mee because so soone I haue beleeued and
thou often takest thy flight For thou departest suddenlie out of her hands when she cannot laie holde vpon thee I doo praise thee but in this how shall I praise thee If thou hast anie praise and sweetenes whie doo you seeme to forgoe it in this deed If thou wert not she might be offended But she can take none offence at thee who so mightelie doost loue her If therefore anie good reason be signified vnder that lesson ô God showe it mee For gladlie would I vnderstand the same neither do I thinke it vnnecessarie to learne though it be but little Because no man of himselfe can behold thy secret iudgements but it is thy light which dooth both inlighten darke and driue awaie hurtfull things What therefore may the cause be that sometime so secretlie you withdrawe your selfe from the soule she not witting thereof Doo you loue her or no If you doo loue her then whie do you leaue her my beloued If you loue her not whie then haue you visited her before time Againe if you loue her not whie doo you make returne whie knock you at the doore whie enter you in againe What is it of lightnes that you doo so both go and returne God forbid But so often change dooth not a little greeue her yea much it dooth disquiet her Yet the griefe would be the lesser if thou wouldest saie plainlie I doo goe and will come vnto you your harts shall reioice and your ioie no man shall take from you But now you cast out neuer a by-word onlie she thinketh vpon that speech which she well perceaueth to be performed in her selfe how Iesus hid himselfe and went out of the Temple A fewe things I haue against you but my complaint dooth spring out of a good roote I humblie request to be instructed I loue not to contend And therefore when occasion serueth make answere I beseech you Also let the godlie soule saie for her selfe somewhat for her learning Likewise make you answere boldlie when your part requireth O my soule answere thou thy beloued boldlie For thy freend will patientlie heare and meete thee with milde words that you maie suffer none hinderance For if hee bee not thy comforter who will comfort thee And who more fauorablie will beare thine infirmitie than hee which beareth all things and yet is not burdened And to whome more safelie can you reueale your miserie than to him which perfectlie knoweth all things Or in whome maie you put more confidence than in the truth which deceaueth not Now if anie stranger or one that is not a freend to the spouse shall heare these things let him be driuen from the doores But if hee loue the spouse if he be faithfull if deuoute and spirituall let him haue free ingresse If hee bee a keeper of a good conscience a louer of virtue and discipline if hee bee pure in hart and cleere in iudgement if humble in himselfe and good towards others if he can neither wickedlie carpe at vanelie extoll rashlie reprooue impudentlie maintane nor proudlie commend things but contrariwise if he haue learned both the things which hee conceaueth not to reuerence and also rightlie to interpret obscure and mysticall matters let him haue entrance and heare the communication For the affection of the hart through the sound of words ought to be noted rather than the qualitie of voices And therefore tell me ô soule how doost thou feele thy selfe wanting now the grace of thy beloued I for my part doo see that hardlie I can take it well if he keepe himselfe long awaie and I conceiue the like of you If you thinke good let vs sit heere together and confer we heereof to our comfort CHAP. 14. 1. A lamentation of the soule for the want of grace MIne hart breaketh for desire What is it thou saiest Why saiest thou Zion the Lord hath forsaken mee Feare not daughter Zion thou louing and religious soule lo thy king and welbeloued freend commeth to thee Arise stand vp and beholde the ioie which commeth toward thee from thy God S. I haue sought saith the soule and haue not found I haue called and he hath not answered and therefore I doo breake for thought M. Then said I this is the voice of the Turtle hauing lost her mate It is not now with you as it was yesterdaie and earewhile when you sang the songs of mirth S. The morning is past night commeth and the spouse resteth himselfe at noone tide yet maie I not come nigh him M. Your woords are sorowfull and your eies shed teares O soule thou art grieued and hast neede of comfort But speake whence commeth your griefe S. I am not troubled either for gold or siluer or anie worldlie matter neither for lucre nor for hurt neither for iniurie nor for pouertie for I am now dead and crucified to the world M. If I bee not deceaued long since you renounced the world But whether in all things perfectlie you haue denied the same and art come euen into a verie hatred of your selfe I would faine knowe S. Verie fewe haue that gift and it is especiallie looked for at your hands M. Whie therefore are you so pensiue What haue you forgon If it be for your freend his sake I must needs confesse you doo well to be sad neither should you take delight in anie thing vntill he returne and visit you againe But in the meane while how doo you susteine your selfe vpon the beloued ô sweete soule And sure I am hee is not alwaie present at a wish Therefore while he is absent what comfort haue you wherein doo you take delight Tell me your secrets be theie neuer so grieuous That you beare the absence of Christ heauilie no man doubteth but he onlie that loueth not Now you are sad I take it not for this world but for the spouse Christ. And I knowe full well that when hee shall returne you will be merrie againe because hee will not alwaies forget you For he hath said I will not leaue you comfortlesse but I will come to you Therefore your wordes are not vane being vttered with such griefe but theie declare a louing hart and strike the cold affection which is not inflamed with the loue of Christ. For your voice is the voice of a Turtle not the crieng of a murmurer And therefore I trust you shall finde him whose losse you so lament Notwithstanding I demaund What saie you of him whose absence you doo so bewaile Is he good or no S. Doubtlesse hee is good and singularlie good too righteous and faithfull in him there is no wickednes neither can be M. Whie therefore lament you for the good in whome is no deceipt S. I weepe not for the good in respect that hee is good but I lament mine owne miserable condition because I haue lost a good and a faithfull freend I euen I haue deserued this but alas alas that I kept not his fauor
presence I will bewaile thine absence because euen this is a token of loue and a great pleasure to the louing soule Now then the sense of this sentence appeareth Because it is rightlie said of the louing soule how the more feruentlie she loueth and the more earnestlie she longeth after eternall things the more trulie she feeleth the power thereof working within her Theie are not cold woords but to the vnkinde soule neither deafe organs but to the hardened hart The louing and zelous soule knoweth this well and is so often inflamed in hart as she is pricked with the desire of eternall peace And therefore shee speaketh to thee her Lord God not to men of whome she would not be knowen And although sometime she talketh with men yet that which theie heare is to the outward sense But whatsoeuer she saith to thee it is to the verie soule and rather by sighing of the hart than by sounding words Lo saith she in peace is my most bitter bitternes As if she said After that of thy goodnes I returned vnto the peace of minde the transitorie state of the world began to be still more grieuous vnto mee For I see in this peace how far I am separated from the soueraigne peace And in deede beeing first busied with earthlie desires and mooued with diuers passions I was greatlie hindered from spirituall cogitations and so from heauenlie contemplation after which I should haue much longed but that could I least of all doo because through slothfulnes I did forgo all sense of inward sorowe But nowe seeing the troobles of idle thoughts are taken awaie I doo somewhat rest in the peace of conscience and am drawen vnto heauenlie matters with mine whole hart and I do more lament that I do not enioie the good things of God than erst I did moorne being vexed with the troobles of this world So that it is bitternes to my soule euen to liue in this world and to go vnder the heauie burden of sin But it is bitterest of all when somuch as I maie all mine affections being gathered together I doo enioie now the good things of the hart and bend my selfe euen with hartie zeale toward the armes of eternall peace and yet maie not attaine thereunto because of the bonds of my mortall state And this makes mee euen with griefe of hart to crie vnto thee and to saie O wretched man that I am who shall deliuer mee from the bodie of this death There is none so greuous a burden vnto me as stil to wander frō thee by liuing in the world for laboring in loue I wish for no comfort beside thee For by good experience I haue long sithence learned that my soule can neither be satisfied with the good things of this world nor yet be blessed vntill she be ioined vnto thee in the celestiall habitation For as exceedinglie she doth loue burne and vse contemplation while she is in the bodie so will her desire be insatiable vntill the bodie be laide off And therefore her ende must be made perfect by attaining the souereigne felicitie and the light of thy countenance O King of heauen so amiable in all respects ô my all louelie beloued euen wholie to be desired when wilt thou fill mee with the light of thy countenance when wilt thou satisfie my longing with the well of life My soule hath much thirsted after thee and greatlie will be troobled vntill she attaine thee Liuing in the world and not seeing thee I can take no comfort of whatsoeuer I beholde so greatelie dooth zeale waxe hot that not once but often I breake into these words When shall I come and appeere before the face of my God And this loue of mine cesseth not but encreaseth more and more in such sort that I am driuen euen to weepe night and daie while continuallie I doo thinke with my selfe Where is now my God For it is a comfort to the louing soule to weepe for thy sake while she must want her desire and still expect thy comming And these teares doo more feede and refresh the louing soule than if she enioied all the things of this world For did she loue them she would not weepe for thee Oah how blessed and pleasing to thee is the sheading of such teares For theie doo both kill the desires of secular and temporall ioies and also theie obteine the celestiall consolation And therefore none doo shed such holie teares but theie which are both singularlie in loue and verie notablie religious Far of another kinde be the teares of such as miserablie be troobled in this world For one man weepeth because he is sick another for that he is oppressed another because he is iniured another because his minde is contraried but it is thou religious soule onlie which powrest forth teares euen of pure loue to thy Sauior-ward as for temporall damage and worldlie causes theie trooble thee not for thou submittest thy selfe to the righteous iudgement of God and art thankefull And for so dooing let no worldlie creature iudge thee either foolish or impatient because thy teares doo not greeue but comfort theie doo not blur the face but wash it theie hurt not the eies but theie purifie the sight of the minde Howbeit let others conceaue heereof as theie will I cannot but thinke otherwise than well of you for I doo wish to drinke deep of such teares S. If you wish to weepe with mee then maie you bee comforted with mee Oah that your soule were as I am you could neuer forget what I doo feele I knowe whome I credit and sure I am it is a more easie thing to denie that there is anie heauen and earth than that there is a God And I knowe also hee is my full happines and that I shall neuer bee blessed vntill I haue an absolute sight of his maiestie Whose sight because it is not yet granted me nor alwaies assured me doth make me to lamēt inasmuch as I am depriued of happines wrapped in the darknes of this life and downpeised with the waight of mine owne infirmitie that I am not of power to suffer that wonderfull light and that whatsoeuer I do think cōcerning the glorie of heauen is so litle and ouershadowed as it were with a cloude Hence it is that I dooble my complaint in steede of a song and while theie still saie vnto mee Where is thy God my spirit is the more troobled For thus I thinke then Where is my felicitie where is the full ioie of mine hart where is my true peace and reste Where be all the good things that are vnspeakeable but onlie in my God And when shall I enioie them vnlesse I be ioined vnto him hauing nothing betweene Yea when shall I there bee I knowe not but I beleeue well I doo hope well but yet I haue not Whie then where is my God whome I loue so and yet I see him not Through whose loue I
things both in heauen and in earth but small things in thine eies SOVLE Surelie I take all things but for trifles MAN What then seekest thou Whome would you haue without these And where will you finde him if not in these things Hath he either name or place or habitation to be sought by Where is the place where his honor dwelleth of which in a certaine psalme thou sangest saying O Lord I haue loued the habitation of thine house and the place where thine honor dwelleth Make answere I praie thee For if thou canst show mee him I will go with thee and wee will seeke him together yea and he shall be thy God and my God and wee shall be full happie when wee haue found him and hold him SOVLE What aske you this at mine hands Or whie so curiouslie do you enquire of this matter of me Thinke you I can or am able to vtter such things What though gladlie I would conceaue not yet that what through the rarenes of the thing and the deepnes of the mysterie I am restrained back What aske you mee Aske them who haue both heard and seene they are such as better can describe him whome you seeke But rather aske him that knoweth all things For he it is of whome we speake that both best can tell you who himselfe is yea and best declare the place of his owne aboade Euen he it is and none other which teacheth man knowledge and giueth his grace also to the humble Make recourse vnto him which reuealeth himselfe when hee will and to whome he will neither is there anie beside him that can open Hee alone can reueale to thee what the ioie is of such as loue him and that far more excellentlie than I can tell you MAN But why speake you on this wise ô holie and humble Soule Thinke not that I would know that of you which neither ought to bee knowen nor can bee vttered Keep your secret to your selfe let your doore still abide shut vpon you let the seale of faith remaine vncancelled neither let the vale for me bee remoued from the sanctuarie Eate you holie bread by your selfe in the chappell go in into the tabernacle of your house ascend into the vpper parlor enter into the cellar of the eternall king or which is more noble and soundeth more sweetlie euen into the bride-chamber of your celestiall spouse I know it is written It is not good to take the childrens bread and to cast it to whelps I know this I saie and haue read it but marke againe what followeth and take pittie vpon me according to the words of her that said The whelpes doo eate of the â—romms which fall from their maisters table And therefore hide not that fro mee which I demaund but of the greatnes of your inward pleasures poure-out euen a sparcle of the firie loue Giue me one small drop of pretious wine send forth some little sauour of the best ointment whose chiefest part and louelie comâ—ort is well and vsuallie knowne to thee that I also maie taste thereof Whie linger you Satisfie my desire and open the doore to a freend now at this third knock O beloued speake of the welbeloued let not mee bee neglected If you cannot describe him rightlie as he is yet speake of him so well as you can For indeed as he is who is able to describe him Yea who is able to conceaue the describer Therefore if not as in himselfe he is yet tell me what thou thinkest of him If not what to himselfe yet vtter out how good hee hath bin to thee For who euer shall search forth what he is in himselfe Thou wilt neuer doo it because thou hast plainlie confessed and not denied how speaking of him Thy knowledge is too wonderfull for me it is so high that I cannot attaine vnto it Whether shall I goe from thy Spirit If then thou art not able to knowe thine owne spirit which the creator and quickner of all spirits hath made how at anie time wilt thou knowe him which is vncreated Did not this make thee all amazed to saie O Lord who is like vnto thee Notwithstanding of all frendship by some similitude describe him whose essence thou hast not yet attained vnto Neither is it for you to denie to showe him in part whome you thinke can not wholie bee reuealed S. I must needs saie you are too curious and importune vpon mee Thou searchest all my priuities and lettest in thine hand into the secrets of my chamber I sent thee vnto him and commest thou againe vnto mee Seeke you mee or him But I praie you of what spirit art thou Bee still I beseech thee and trouble mee not For whome thou seekest hee is aboue mee M. But can hee that seeketh after God so easelie giue ouer Protract not to speake for you maie comfort mee forth-with How long will you keepe mee in suspense What doo you saie and vnsaie As I liue I will not giue ouer except you blesse mee For I compt it a blessing if thou showe mee my God Now therefore if thou hast seene him tell mee plainlie and I will take him vpon my shoulders S. I knowe thou hast a great desire and a loue vnto the creator But a great thing is it which you require at mine hands and such a thing as I am in doubt whether it maie be done or no. Hee whome thou seekest knoweth it right well for it is not in mee to let thee know so much Your demaund seemeth vnto mee to be like that of the Spouse which in the Songs did saie Show mee ô thou whome my soule loueth where thou feedest Wilt thou then learne of me who this is or what good hee hath done with mee Doubtlesse it is not in mee to show you But you are not content neither his greatnes who exceedeth the heauens can deterre you nor my weakenes which in his eies am nothing make you to desist Whie hast thou laid this burden vpon mee I am not able to tell thee vntill I goe into the sanctuarie of God and vnderstand the same Whie are you so desirous to know that which maie not be vttered M. And will you not Oh how faine would I bee instructed For those things wee are most earnest to know which the most hardlie maie bee reuealed Notwithstanding once againe I praie you be not so hard as altogether to be silent Thinke not that forthwith I will vtter what you shall saie vnto our enemies I will keepe your saieng as a friend yea as a verie friend ought to doo You maie boldlie tell mee your mind secretlie Lo wee two be heere alone neither I with lightnes nor you with arrogancie are delighted but in him which hath giuen vs vnderstanding euen of him will wee speake And if happelie he come while we are talking let vs giue place and let him be betweene vs. If he vouchsafe
in exile that I haue not deserued to enioie thee nor to see thee face to face Grant mee to enioie the long desired ioie which no time shall ende nor troubles ouershadowe Show mee thy countenance which the angels continuallie do behold Let thy voice bee heard in mine eares which they without cessing doo heare Come Lord Iesu and take mee out of this forreine contrie call mee wretch home vnto my contrie and restore mee a sinner vnto my former puritie Come gratious Redeemer make mee partaker of thine eternall glorie It is hie time that I returne vnto thee it is now time that I commend my bodie to the earth whereout it was taken The matter is not great where the bodie be laide or how it be handled if so be the soule be safe and come vnto thee Let my spirit doo well which I commend into thine hands and let my flesh rest in hope to be raised vp againe in the last daie For wheresoeuer it be buried it can neuer bee far or hid from thee Remooue mee from the companie of men and ioine mee to the societie of thy saincts For this temporall life is irkesome to mee but to thinke of the daie of eternall glorie reioiceth mine heart Oah let not the olde serpent withstand mee at my departure out of Aegypt let not the enimie barke against mee in the gate let neither Satan with his ouglie sight terrefie nor the horror of death trooble mee but let thine holie angels faithfullie assist stoutlie aide valiantlie protect louinglie receiue and ioiefullie bring mee vnto the euerlasting felicitie of thy celestiall paradise And mercifull louelie and blessed Iesu doo thou gratiouslie I beseech thee behold mee and cast mee not out of the number of thy seruants but remember ô Sonne of God how thou hast redeemed mee with thy pretious blood Receaue mee into glorie and that in thy mercie and goodnes because greatlie haue I wished to solemnize a passeouer with thee Oah happie daie of my desired reward Come blessed houre of blessed passage which long I haue desired and kept before mine eies What now haue the troobles and afflictions in the world hurt mee What am I the woorsse for the contempt labor and humiliation for thy name sake Thou hast bin my life and now death will be to me an aduantage and to be with thee in thy kingdome will be absolute felicitie Now praise and glorie be to thee who art the life of such as liue the hope of those which die the saluation and rest of all which trust in thee CHAP. 8. A meditation of one dead vnto the world yet aliue in Christ. TVrne awaie mine eies from regarding vanitie Oah Iesu which art the true life which neuer shall haue an ende geue mee grace that through loue of thee I may bee consumed through loue wounded through loue killed that the flesh preuaile not ouer mee I am not as yet thoroughlie dead to the world but the old man yet liueth in mee raising vp within me much contention and desires of manifold euils and making the nightes bitter and the daies tedious vnto mee Oah when will it fall out that boldlie I may saie I thought my selfe as a dead man For hee which dead is doth waie neither the praises of men nor the reproches of the malignant because he is dead Hee which touching the flesh is dead neither speaketh nor smelleth nor tasteth nor exerciseth anie worke yea he neither heareth also the vanitie of this world againe he regardeth not curious and bewtifull things enticing vnto the loue of some vile thing vpon earth And hee which is dead to the world is not in the world but in God to whome hee liueth euen as Paule to the beloued disciples doth saie yee are dead and your life is hid with Christ in God This man doth so speake so thinke so behold things without as though they were not For the things which are seene are temporall and vane but the things which are not seene are eternall Hether doth hee cast his eie hether doth hee hasten hether is his desire for these things doth hee labor to attaine these things is all his studie These things hee wisheth these things hee loueth these things hee seeketh these things hee sauoreth euen which are within and secret to wit great good things soueraigne and eternall things of which hee cannot thinke too often because theie are exceeding pretious and sweete and delectable and more than vtterable This man is far estranged from present things and breatheth altogether after things eternall hauing the dominion ouer the sensuall appetite For the flesh seeketh outward desireth pleasant loueth present loatheth absent flieth all sharp and bitter things which notwithstanding are good for the soule Whence it commeth that it will not suffer the spirit to be at rest but laieth before it sundrie phantasies which are scarse to be spoken and in truth not to be accompted of But hee which is endued with the grace of spirituall fortitude maie with more ease subdue the insolent motions of the flesh singing in the word of the diuine power The Lord is with mee therefore I will not feare what flesh can doo vnto mee Therefore albeit this sensualitie doth moue battell and the voice of the flesh doth secretlie murmur yet doth not the spirituall man easelie consent for greater is the force of the diuine loue which inwardlie doth comfort This man now and then so sweetlie so stronglie and so earnestlie is drawen rauished and in loue with God that scarselie hee doth see and perceaue the things about him and be heard in the world because he is not there but else-where not belowe but aloft euen with God and in God which moueth the spirit within him and erecteth and as it were carrieth it awaie in a firie chariot that at the length it maie enioie him in an happie and holie and long wished desire of his hart This man is sildome found idle abroade because his freende hath borne him awaie There quietlie and alone hee heareth his speech euen the speech of his beloued and greatlie doth reioice to heare the voice of his vnsuspected spouse Neither straight-waie doth he cas◠his phiall vpon the ground to draw◠vp vanitie but hideth the founde◠treasure and shutteth it vnder loc◠and keie that the foote of pride com◠not in and so all virtue doo perish◠For thus he saith to him Set mee a◠a seale on thine heart and so forth as i◠followeth in that place It is good to seale the heart and to keepe it least the beloued goe back and flie awaie because hee seeketh and visiteth aboue all a pure and an humble heart These things hee thinketh with himselfe and is astonished at that good thing which passeth all sense and gifts Yea still hee wandereth and enquireth diligētlie what thing is this and exceedinglie reioiceth for
whether soeuer thou goest But euerie one hath not the gift to be so affected neither is it a weake stomach that can so readelie folowe thee vnto all things M. What let hast hou ô my soule that thou doost not forsake all for Iesus sake Whie so vnwillinglie doo you depart from vane and transitorie things What good can these worldlie things doo you Behold while you passe by mortall things and visible creatures willing to delight your self in them you forget better things While you so doo you seuer your selfe from the soueraigne good thing and turne your minde from the true blessed and eternall life And therefore you shall continue miserable and wretched full of griefe and vexation For turne your selfe on which side you will and you shall finde matter of continuall sorow and much tediousnes vntill you turne againe vnto thy creator because he is thy peace and secure quietnes But if thou neither make staie in earthlie things nor fasten thy foote in the mire but rather beholde and worship in the glasse of worldlie creatures not the figure which passeth awaie but him whose image and superscription it is blessed art thou and shalt neuer die For when thou seekest after these visible things not to enioie them but beholdest them to the ende to glorifie the name of thy creatour by making to thy selfe of his best and basest woorkes a kinde of ladder wherewithall thou maist ascend thou shalt be deliuered so from the filthie bowels of this world and thoroughlie bee coopled to thy desired ende which is aboue all things the blessed God for euer and euer CHAP. 13. 1. How and when the soule and God are vnited together 2. The miserie where God is not present MY Soule cleaueth vnto thee O my God the true comforter thou knowest how thou likest me well and how I take pleasure dailie to be talking with thee secretlie alone But where maie I seeke thee if happelie I do misse thee for an hour who shall bring mee vnto thee Thou art God aboue all things and I beneath all things a miserable man Thou art in heauen and I in the world Thou art most high but I am poore and a begger Who euer hath measured the distance betweene heauen and earth Far asunder be theie but farder art thou fro mee ô God Who therefore shall vnite mee to thee either thou must doo it or none can But if thou wilt it maie speedelie be doon And thou knowest how of my selfe I maie easelie fall but that I doo stand and go forward it is of thy goodnes So that my soule dependeth vpon the grace of thy spirit and of the infusion of thy speciall fauor I◠thou command it shall be lifted vp from earth but if thou turne awaie thy face it shall be greatlie troobled But of thy woonted fauor and mercie receaue mee and let thy right hand guide mee wonderfullie vnto thee Heare this all yee people giue eare all yee that dwell in the world for it is an easie thing with God to bring it to passe as it is written that the rich and poore maie be all one I am poore and lack manie things but this my God is rich and wanteth nothing And although no great experience yet I haue an vndoubted testimonie to prooue that the soule through grace maie be vnited to God My beloued is mine saith he and I am his he feedeth among the lilies This is the testimonie of the frende and his dearling of the bridegroome and the spouse and it is a verie fit and a strong testimonie of the holie lawe The next is like to this I will that theie all maie be one as thou ô father art in mee and I in thee Behold the notable testimonies of two bookes whereby it plainelie appeareth that the soule through speciall grace from aboue maie bee linked familiarlie vnto God And although it rarelie come so to passe yet is it deerelie to be accompted of and not altogether vnknowen to the louer And againe though verie hardlie yet may it fall out The soule therefore so conioined to God let no man dare to separat or to trooble If thou doost woonder at this maruelous vnion woonder thou and maruell at the excellencie of his goodnes and at the strange and singular vniting of the humane bodie to his Godhead Hee maie doo what he will which onlie dooth great woonders If thou lookest for merits you shall finde it is his good pleasure to haue it so O sweete societie with Christ and vnder the wings of Christ O gratious coniunction full of loue and sweetenes of the holie Ghoste the which is perceaued better than vttered These things belong vnto the soule that is estranged from all worldlie matters and is not delighted with this present life but is carried aloft in godlie meditation The more the louer knoweth this the more am I ignorant Notwithstanding gladlie would I bee in presence when the deuout soule is in such an happie case And then is she so when the spouse and she is together at the noone daie But then it fareth ill with her and that verie ill too if it happen that Iesus bee awaie if the perfumes of grace run not from aboue if no pleasure she take in the holie Bible if it bee irksome for her to continue in praier and godlie meditation if the cloudes of the hart be so thick and hurtfull cogitations doo so preuaile that theie cannot be restrained but do labor to ouerwhelme in a manner all the former good things O Lord God whie doost thou so What plaie is this O blessed Iesus what meane you heereby If it were not offensiue to thine honor I could wish to haue farther communication betweene thee and thy beloued Forsomuch as she is so greatlie desirous of thy gratious presence whereby she may be nourished with chaste delightes I doo much muse whie sometime you suffer her to fit so desolate Thou passest by and goest thy waie as though she had no desire vnto thee But she is alone all pensiue For thus she saith in effect With my soule haue I desired thee in the night It is night with her when thou the true light art not present So that she praieth for thy presence that the darkenes of sinne comprehend her not For she feeleth manifold discommodities when thy gratious visitation is taken from her For had she not suffered somewhat she had neuer so earnestlie cried vnto thee Another also which was before said cried thus My soule cleaueth vnto thee But I thinke no trouble is or seemeth so troublesome to her as the want of thy presence And no maruell if through this want the waieward soule doo languish awaie in sorow For thou art verie hardlie found at anie time and being found she reioiceth at thy returne hoping to spend the daie merelie with thee but thinking little of thy departure she suspecteth no aduersitie to come But handling another matter secretlie
By the lack I haue now learned what I haue lost And the absence of a freend showeth what his presence did good I was merrie and iocund with him but I did no whit consider of his speedie departure He came skipping vpon the mountaines hee was ioiefull and iocund in the porches of mine house And straight-waie I locked the doores of the flesh and let in the beloued vnto mee I did sit and rested within vnder his shadowe from the haile and raine And it did mee much good to haue his companie Whie should I not reioice Hee is my ioie and the comfort of mine hart Ah what had I And what then did I possesse I am not able to vtter how well I prospered then neither is it conuenient that I should I could not desire more then I had he beeing present whome alone I loued Oah how did I loue when I despised both my selfe and all things beside I had either little or no care at all of anie thing that might delight me for I was rauished with loue of him and whatsoeuer was not my beloued I loathed as altogether vnsauerie But he being taken awaie I am in a manner cleane out of hart For my soule depended vpon his grace because I had none other comfort besides him whose absence I doo thus lament He did content me and was sufficient to the making of true mirth in deed As I would so was he and whatsoeuer he enioined mee I tooke it in good part and I consecrated my selfe wholie and franklie to his will So that there was a good agreement and great quietnes betweene vs. No man durst be so bold as to interrupt our silence when hee had commanded so through my mouth L. I charge you ô daughters of Ierusalem by the roes and by the hindes of the fielde that yee stir not vp nor waken my loue vntill shee please S. Now therefore note if you be able to conceaue my woords what great cause I haue to lament the absence of my freend by whose presence I began to bee so rich with all good things M. Heereunto I answered I knowe well what you saie by often experience I haue prooued so much as you speake But let vs comfort our selues in this that the dispensation of his will is the encrease of our zeale and deuotion And now I haue receaued with thankefulnes that which you haue vttered notwithstanding I would more thoroughlie haue them beaten into mine head For theie which be hard of conceiuing are often to be told of a matter CHAP. 15. 1. Touching the fruite of freendship 2. The benefits of Christ vpon man 3. The true felicitie and ioie of the soule 4. The affinitie betweene Christ and the soule of man PRaised bee GOD which hath not put back my praier fro mee Therefore I am now againe zelouslie to enquire if your freend at anie time left you without inward comfort What meane you What muse you heere about How also maie hee bee reconciled and reclamed Of all freendship I beseech you ô deere and beloued soule to Christ conceale none of these things which I am to demaund of you You maie so doo me a pleasure in opening to mee your godlie cogitations By your talke I shall be able to measure the waight of my griefe whether iustlie or without cause I was pensiue For I haue seene you sometime merie and sometime sad and by and by glad againe and by you I did somewhat consider of my selfe But I suppose the chiefest cause of this your alteration is that returning and departure of the beloued The which hath made mee perceauing how you haue run ouer manie matters for mine instruction to resort vnto you S. According to your desire I will bend my selfe somewhat to vnfolde the things which I feele within mee both when I am with my freend and also when I am alone looking for him whome I so doo loue This first vnderstand I reape not so much ioie and pleasure by his presence but I finde as much sorow and bitternes through his absence But whie it pleaseth him so to come and go rather I had he should declare than I. But you shall heare it when I haue finished the words of my song because in the ende we will bring him in vnto vs and sitting among vs hee shall teach vs his order the which he vseth to show vnto such as desire his presence In the meane while giue attentiue eare vnto mee and be not offended at mine homelie speech For wee are now come together to stir vp our harts and either to weep together or through loue to reioice together For wo vnto him that is alone because when hee falleth into some sorow or tentation there is not a second to lift him vp And if to be together theie will comfort one the other while one being sad the other ministreth ioie or if he refuse to be comforted he shall be pittied forthwith and griefe will be taken for his griefe and so it will fall out that either theie will both be glad or both sad together And although some sorowe doo yet still continue for some aduersitie or matter of sorowe yet the more patientlie theie beare it because their harts be so linked that nothing can change or alter their mindes Now who seeing this faithfull concord of mindes but must needes breake into these woords and saie Behold how good and how comelie a thing it is brethren to dwell euen together And therefore I can the more boldlie tel you what I thinke because I dread no deceipt or subtiltie in you Lo this all sweete spouse and best beloued frend our Lord Iesus Christ the louer of holie soules euen of pure loue not able otherwise to doo allured mee vnto him and when I was not he gaue me life wisedome and power to behold this common light Hee gaue mee grace to be borne anewe by Baptisme and adorned mee with the roabe of his pretious merits Ouer and besides when afterward I had foulie bespotted my selfe with sinne and was far vnfit to loue him he cast not his eie vpon my filthines but vpon the side of his mercies For when as yet I wandered out of the waie hee reclamed mee of his goodnes not suffering mee to perish in this wicked world Moreouer he hath prouided mee a place to rest in so long as I liue in this mortall bodie Notwithstanding this dwelling vnder the shadow of the beloued is not the true rest nor the rest which shall for euer continue but that is the true rest which wee shall feele after the labors of this present life Yet for the soule to perceaue her selfe to be vnburdened of worldlie cares and there to rest where she maie the more fullie serue her beloued and attend vpon him in the secret chamber of silence it is a kinde of comfort Furthermore my freend hath not left but assisted mee in my diuers troubles and sorest tentations Also he hath both
instructed mee oftentimes with profitable sermons and confirmed mee in his word And as yoong plants are woont to be watred with showers so he hath watered me with inward comfort that the virtue newlie implanted within me maie not wither L. And he said to me If thou hast a lust vnto me and wilt harken vnto me thou shalt enioie good things if thou wilt doo whatsoeuer I command you thou art a frend of mine If thou wilt choose me and loue me aboue all things all things that you aske my father will giue you but if you forgoe me then shalt thou come to destruction for my wrath shall bee incensed against thee if thou seeke after another he shal not please thee long but thou wilt loath and abhor him Because I am the saluation and the life of the soule S. So I turned mee vnto him which had doon me good and expelling my selfe from out the dust of earthlie affections I decreed in mine hart from thenceforth to serue him onlie because I found nothing better than him nor could imagine no couenant more profitable Let others iet and seeke what freendship theie will else-where I am thoroughlie perswaded this is the true man of the soule for whose sake me thinks I could gladlie forsake this world to enioie his loue euerlastinglie And therefore I stuck vnto him for he liked me still neither could I finde a better freend For my soule alwaie hath exceedinglie desired such a one as is the greatest for power the best for goodnes the woorthiest for dignitie and the most happie for all good things And because he is verie curteous he gaue me comfortable woords warelie fore-seeing that theie should neither terrefie nor breake mee through ouer-much roughnes but rather enioine and teach mee that which should bee both light and sweete to be borne that so my yoong affection might the better be drawen on and the more forceablie addicted to the freend beloued and shrinke not back M. She shall the better said he be instructed and profit if not by force but through gentlenes she be prouoked forward She wil the more easilie receaue my yoake rather by loue with rewards than by feare with punishment And if she neede impulsion let it wiselie be vsed that violence doo not ouerthrowe her For he knew right well what was best for a yoong plant and what profit this his kindnes would bring vnto mee especiallie at the time of triall when I should easelie call into my remembrance the good things which at the first he did vnto my soule and thereby take courage to proceede in the battell He would not straight-waie open vnto me what and how much trooble I was to endure in his seruice but sometime hee tempered aduersitie with prosperitie well considering my weakenes at the first vntill through experience I had gotten strength to endure affliction After all this he carried me about enstructed and boare me vpon his shoulders Hee conducted me ouer the holie Scripture and with the heate of his holie Spirit he armed me against the wicked tentations of Satan Moreouer he placed before mine eies examples of all the virtues namelie the holie Patriarches and Prophets besides the glorious lights of the new Testament Euen as a Mother teacheth her litle childe so hee instructed mee breaking spirituall shales and putting the carnels into my iawes because theie were sweete to be eaten Search if you can what theie signifie and where such maie be found Open the apostolicall booke reade aduisedlie and see if you are able to comprehend so great mysteries Peruse the Prophet Isaiah looke into the Gospell the light of all lights and marke if theie doo not yeeld most plesant notes of themselues In them whatsoeuer you finde which is obscure and hard to be vnderstood that is a nut in a shel But if you heare it expounded and vnderstand that which afore you did not then broken is the shel and the sweetnes of the â—ut dooth sauor in the hart And so are we to iudge of other darke sentences Whereby you maie behold so manie nuts as you see hidden sentences And how thinke you did he beare me on his shoulders That he did so often as he beheld mine infirmitie and yet neither cast me off nor despised me but patientlie and mercifullie did beare with me Againe he did beare me on his shoulders when he made other men to beare with mine infirmities and whatsoeuer was blameworthie within mee Besides yet more louinglie he did beare me on his shoulders when he bare his crosse vnto the place called the place of dead mens sculs where hee was crucified For then was I a more heauie burden vnto him than the crosse was And my sins were more grieuous to his bones than this wood of the crosse to his back Because for my sake that crosse was carried not for his owne sake Oah how is hee aboue all things to be loued and to be worshipped by whose grace and merits I am thus both found out and redeemed And therefore he shall be as deere to me as the child is to his mother But well I knowe that I am far vnmeete to loue him Notwithstanding my boldnes commeth from his goodnes Neither could I doo otherwise but run vnto his most freendlie embracements when hee showed himselfe so kinde vnto mee I doo well remember what the Prophet Dauid in a certaine place doth saie What am I and what is my life or the familie of my father in Israel that I should be sonne in lawe to the King But our affinitie together is much more excellent than this of Dauid and Saul Because ours is a pure and syncere kinred not with flesh and blood but betweene God himselfe betweene faith vnuiolated and a good conscience Of this did that Disciple whome Iesus loued speake on this wise Greater is hee that is in you than hee that is in the world For God is loue and loue bringeth forth this kinred Therefore sith Dauid thought himselfe far vnmeet to be sonne in lawe vnto an earthlie King much more abashed ought I to be to enter into alliance with the King of all Kings that vouchsafeth to allure me vile wretch into his freendship So that he hath delt with mee not according to my deserts but euen as it seemed good in his mercifull eies Oah blessed and happie art thou soule now thou art fast bound with the chaine of the heauenlie loue Oah how noble and free art thou seeing thou art priuie euen to the sighings of so holie copulation But seing I haue spent manie words about the beloued and yet haue not answered fullie vnto your demaund let vs now begin afresh and God grant that our speech may bee both to our comfort and profit CHAP. 16. 1. The more wee loue Christ the more we maie 2. Tentation and when 3. Happines of the life to come 4. How to beare affliction BEhold as the eies of seruants looke vnto
ouer mine hart which forthwith driueth out the cloudes of all wicked cogitations whereby I doo enioie the long desired cleerenes of God his light Because no vncleane nor filthie thing can stand where he entereth in for hee loueth puritie and is the ingraffer of the same so that of necessitie all satanicall illusion together with the pomps of this world must be packing Therefore my passions and tentations which I did endure being supprised I began both the more euidentlie to knowe and the more earnestlie to loue and the more hartelie to praise him for vouchsafing at the length to beate back the damned crewe of the wicked from assailing mee For theie doo disturbe my peace and sin dooth so shut vp my mouth that I am ashamed to speake vnto my welbeloued But in vaine doo theie bend themselues against his power and wisedome because euen in a moment he can slide downe into mine hart and poure in secretlie good motions that I maie both contemne and vtterlie neglect all their priuie whisperings O my faithfull and all happie freend take mee so vnto thee whensoeuer thou shalt perceaue mine affections to be either pressed downe at anie time with the waight of sin or to be held with vnnecessarie busines that I maie not wander far astraie from thee after the swarme of wicked cogitations and so ouerhastelie be depriued of thy grace without which I shall not be able to enioie thy freendship For thou art my Lord and my God which by thy word doost both heale and sanctifie which holdest my soule in life and sufferest not my feete to slip but deliuerest mee from the euill daie and from the snares of death Oah how manie haue bin cast off and vtterlie perished that haue bin much more innocent than I am And therefore my soule praise thou the Lord and all that is within mee blesse his holie Name My soule I saie praise thou the Lord and forget not all his benefits It is all too little and far vnsufficient whatsoeuer thou shalt either thinke or speake or promise to his praise For hee exceedeth all praise and is much sweeter than anie musick Wherefore my soule cleaueth to thee alone and loueth thee aboue all other gifts notwithstanding it be exceedinglie beutifull and sweete which of meere good will thou hast sent vnto mee For thou alone art the spouse as for all things else theie are gifts and arguments of loue In steed of thee I will not loue them neither will I beleeue that anie thing or all things in the world can suffice mee if I haue not thee for in so dooing I maie perchance forgoe thee with them too Thou giuest me leaue to vse manie things for thy sake but I maie not enioie so much as one thing in thy steed And therefore ô Christ my sweete spouse I haue preferred thee afore all other things and my care hath bin aboue all things to loue thee Wherefore grant that blessedlie I maie enioie thee and in that vnion euerlastinglie to triumph in happines together with thee But how far am I come I haue lengthened my speech more than perhaps you would But pardon me good freend For I haue bin carried aloft through the loue of mine especiall and onlie freend and would to God it would please him still to lift vp both mee and you too in contemplation Let him prouide an heauenlie ascension but let vs not keepe a base going downe M. Aske you mee whether I am forsaken at anie time of my beloued S. Yea I saie so M. But how doo you behaue your selfe in trooble S. I take all things as patientlie as I can expecting his comming Naturalie I am grieued but as touching my spirit I haue inward patience that my griefe prooue not incurable For I forget not how hee that loueth liueth in paine I liue by faith I beleeue the holie Scriptures I giue credit to the words of comfort And although I endure affliction yet I doubt not neither in deede ought I to doubt but that God when it pleaseth him can send mee ease For true and to be credited are those woordes which are declared Because the verie sancts themselues haue bin exercised in manie and proued in like things Nature continuallie dooth wish for quietnes and seeketh to be comforted in some thing but the spirit notwithstanding is readie to sustaine whatsoeuer the wil of God is I should endure If therefore I shall be lesse zelous and lesse willing to doo good my punishment shall be the more greuous Though he slaie me saith the wiseman yet will I trust in him If I loue virtues patience is a great virtue therefore let patience euermore bee retained For the more praise we purchase the more paines we take in bringing things to passe And that our virtue maie be proued and made the more glorious we are commonlie exercised by contrarie euents Therefore whensoeuer anie such triall shal happen be not out of hart neither fall downe but reteine thou patience and extoll the righteousnes of God The Lord is not so hard and pittilesse that he can suffer you to abide long vncomforted Onlie haue a care that you neither lament immoderatlie nor yet murmur against the righteous and iust God because you are forsaken least the wicked spirit doo send vnto you more greeuous tentations of your faith whereby being ouerfearefull you shall extreemelie bee afflicted Wherefore beare a little and suppresse your sorowe although the griefe both of your hart and bodie be neuer so great Abide constant in that good purpose which at the first you intended to keepe For it is good especiallie at such an extremitie to cast all confidence vpon the beloued Looke thou patientlie for God his heauenlie comfort so shall you speedelie perceaue a speciall fauor and sight of God Lo you haue a faithfull witnesse saieng I waited patientlie for the Lord and hee inclined vnto mee and heard my crie And that in your neede you maie finde the like fauor I doo wish you both earnestlie to praie your selfe and desire others to praie for you also and so commit your selfe wholie and is priuie vnto the things to come Euen I the Lord which haue doon all things in measure number and weight I am the creator both of heauen and earth the ruler of this world the knower of hidden things the reuealer of secrets the possessor of the whole world and the beholder of the causes of all particulars I am God and change not who haue continuallie with me the causes of all changes in the world I am God the almightie whose power is inuincible I am God the most high whose highnes can not bee attained I am God the most righteous whose beeing can not be conceaued I am for my presence euerie-where and yet no where to be seene I am the most spirituall and farthest from the senses of man I
mine hart bee acceptable in thy sight What can bee more comfortable What more ioiefull to the faithfull Soule than still deuoutlie to meditate vpon her Lord God that whome she cannot as yet behold in a cleere and blessed sight at the least she maie as it were make him present by earnest calling him into minde Therefore let her behold him as in a glasse darkelie whome she is not to see face vnto face And albe she maie not haue a full sight of him in his maiestie yet let her search for him by types in the Scriptures Oah that the care to seeke the face of the Lord did neuer waxe cold within me but dailie more and more encreased Howbeit the soule that loueth God hath a wonderfull desire to enioie the sight of God For to see him is happines in deed and the absolute felicitie Wherefore she desireth this blessednes that her whole appetite hauing attained her ende she maie be satisfied and at quiet for nothing in the world is able to content her For long experience hath taught her that the more she estraieth from celestiall happines the more vnhappie and vnquiet she is in asmuch as in this world nothing is permanent or durable that maie assuage the heate of her affection So then let her make returne vnto him that made her and let her desire to be blessed of him who at the firste created her For doubtlesse he that made the soule must satisfice the soule with good things Because such a desire hath he instilled into her that hee beeing gon nothing will content her nor anie ioie comfort her greatlie And therefore soule of mine stand not heere still for this is no place of rest for thee but mount aloft ascende vnto him that made thee For he hath now sent his messengers and biddeth thee to ascend So manie desires of eternall life as he inspireth so manie messengers he dooth sende Which beeing entertained prepare thy selfe to the iornie Then goest thou on when thou desirest to see him when thou laborest to please him when thou renouncest this world when thou doost whatsoeuer thou doost euen of pure loue to him-ward For had he not first sought thee and powred holie cogitations into thy brest thou couldest neuer seeke him For that soule dooth languish not for loue but through wearines which is not inlightened with the beames of the eternall Sonne But if through the sweete blastes of the Southren winde her frosen coldnes and sorowe be once resolued then by reason of the light inspired and incomprehensible diuinitie she beginneth to sweat through the hotnes of loue Oah infinite heate of the true Sonne what boilings doost thou cause then within the hart of the louer Thou dissoluest the darkenes of a sorowfull minde and bringest the laborsome toile vnto nothing The long time and daies of pouertie thou doost comfort and that abundantlie with one simple beame of thy glorious light O salue of the sorowfull ô shining light of such as wander and seeke Shine thou continuallie vpon me prepare thou a mansion place within me euen till thine euerlasting light doo appeere Oah how sweete and how comfortable will thy presence bee seeing euen of a little remembrance so vnspeakeable ioie dooth arise Howe gladlie can I turne vnto thee how frankelie doo I renounce euen this world that I maie be comforted with thine heauenlie fauor For it will be none hard matter for the soule which longeth for the sight of thy countenance to bereaue her selfe of all outward pleasure when she shall either feele nowe a greater in the minde or verie shortlie expect with a perfect faith for the same Furthermore none is to be so foolish as to thinke that thou wilt leaue the deuout soule anie long while vncomforted or that the gifts of thy fauor which she is to receaue for all her conquests ouer nature shall be small for no earthlie comfort whatsoeuer it bee or whence soeuer it arise is anie whit comparable either in the qualitie or quantitie of sweetnes to the heauenlie ioie And therefore labor thou ô faithfull soule to showe thy selfe such toward thine heauenlie spouse Christ that hee maie continuallie be gratious and fauorable vnto thee for through him and in him you shall in most abundant manner finde that which exceedinglie shall minister comfort vnto you in all extremities The oftener you haue accesse vnto him and the nigher you doo approch vnto his side the sweeter hee will appeere and the more amiable in your eies But if you withdrawe your selfe then the losse wil be your owne and he abiding in his beautie shall feele neither griefe nor trooble You stand in neede of his but he of no mans goodnes So that you maie become blessed through him but so cannot hee by your proceeding Hee alone sufficeth himselfe hee alone can neither bee augmented nor diminished Through his goodnes all things are whatsoeuer bee whether theie haue life sense or vnderstanding And therefore iust it is that all creatures euerlastinglie should blesse him Oah how gladlie would I discourse and speake of him vnto thee if I were able sufficientlie so to doo But what He neither is nor maie be vttered Againe as he cannot be vttered by meanes so can he not be conceaued in minde Which being so thinke notwithstanding of thy Creator so well as man maie taking the remembrance of his abundant sweetnes for a comfort vntill such time as hee reuealeth the sight of his owne countenance vnto thee in the heauens CHAP. 20. 1. A complaint of the Soule for the want of her blessed state 2. What weeping pleaseth God 3. Who trulie blessed 4. A description of God I Said in mine hart I am cast out of thie sight Mine hart is wounded within me throgh the long differring of thy glorie I will speake therefore and reason with my grieued Soule The great zeale of loue compelleth mee to speake and suffereth nothing to be concealed from thee What then shall I saie Lo my God in peace is my most bitter bitternes Hee that is ignorant wotteth not the meaning heereof But it is not so with mee I knowe and I vnderstand it and therefore I am not ashamed to sing with the Prophet I speake to thee my Lord who knowest all things and giuest both knowledge and vnderstanding according to thy good pleasure that neither I maie glorie more than is meete I should nor the foole aduance mee when in truth I am simple I maie confesse then what I haue receaued from thee And yet what neede haue I to tell you thereof when as you are neither ignorant nor can take anie pleasure of the same Againe what comfort can come vnto you which art the comfort of the comfortlesse So that the profit is mine which doo lack the consolation of woords thereby to stir vp mine affection to thee-ward and to finde some ease for my desolate soule For seeing I maie not behold thy
am so often wounded through whose absence I am so grieued through whose gratious visitation so refreshed sometime Where is my God whome euen once to see is to knowe all things Where is my God in whome both mine hart and my flesh doo so earnestlie desire to reioice Where is my God for whose loue I suffer such paine and sorowe His verie remembrance is sweete but his presence is more louelie and expelleth all sadnes fro mine hart Where is mine hope and my crowne Is it not in thee my God and in thy blessed countenance Oah showe mee once thy glorie and thy face so will I cesse to complaine If I contende a little with thee ô blame mee not extreeme zeale of good will hath manie woonderfull deuises I am driuen to expect and moued still to long and so this ioiefull combat dooth continue CHAP. 21. 1. The delaieng of the happie is patientlie to be borne 2. The felicitie of the life to come 3. with a Praier for the same O Lord I haue loued the habitation of thine house and the place where thine honor dwelleth How gladlie I would be with thee thou knowest full well ô my God and how entirelie I desire the same I am not able sufficientlie to expresse I wish it not onlie when I am euill at ease but also what prosperitie soeuer I enioie my desire is to bee with thee But how shall my longing be satisfied Heere it greeueth mee to continue and yet of necessitie I must but my desire is to be with thee and I maie not yet And therefore I see no remedie but that I am with patience to endure this delaie and to refer my wishing to thine holie will For what Is it meete I should murmur when it must be so God forbid Againe I haue the examples of manie of Gods children which haue vsed long patience in this life and yet their harts were in heauen Therefore if thy will be to prolong my pilgrimage I am willing to abide and obeie your pleasure Howbeit that with lesse griefe I may beare my longing to be with thee I will till that time still meditate with my selfe of that celestiall habitation Yet I presume not to pierce into the least of those ioies which thou hast prepared for such as loue thee but of this and that I will meditate to the end that mine affection being pressed downe and infected oftentimes it maie be stirred vp and lifted into the hope of eternall blisse O that that daie had once shined whether then had the ioies of heauen rauished mee How merrie at the hart should I be then and how happie should I thinke my selfe How happie should I then bee enioieng a continuall peace From thencefoorth should I make none enquirie for anie thing seeing no secret could be hid But my life is spent in darkenes and therefore no maruell though my sight doo dazel betweene the cloudes of glorie Notwithstanding I will lift vp mine eies and though a far off behold and salute that holie citie Ierusalem builded in the heauen euen of liuelie stones namelie of holie angels and men replenished continuallie with praise mirth and magnifieng the Lord their God for euer and euer Now therefore my soule take vnto thee the wings of desire and flie vpward flie I saie from all bodelie senses ascend from the visible forme of this world vnto the holie house of God euen vnto the newe Ierusalem builded substantiallie in aie lasting peace crowned with glorie and honor and blessed with the abundance of all good things Lo wonderfull and vnspeakeable are the things of heauen which no man either can or maie vtter No sense is able to conceaue neither can the vnderstanding of man attaine to knowe howe God is in his sanctes glorious and woonderfull in his maiestie Mount thou in cogitation euen vnto the hiest things stretch thy desire into the euerlasting eternitie and saie with the Prophet Glorious things are spoken of thee ô citie of God There whatsoeuer can be wished of man is had and what is once got is kept without care God there is beheld face to face cleerelie trulie continuallie and eternallie There the blessed and all glorious Trinitie in one vnseparable vnitie which of all the blessed citizens of heauen is woorshipped praised and magnified is perfectlie knowen There is mine onlie and right singularlie beloued freend which is more pretious to mee than all riches and the treasure aboue all to bee desired euen my Lord Iesus Christ the immortall spouse of the Church in whome are hid but yet reuealed to the sanctes from the beginning of the world the whole treasure of wisedome and knowledge O how iocund are the sanctes now before the face of the most holie who is the cause and spring of their blessednes For there hee speaketh vnto them not in parables but plainlie of the Father Hee is their booke euen the woord which in the beginning was with God teaching all things and performing all things so that theie want nothing in glorie O blessed and euerlasting glorie not of small remembrance but all happie in God his presence There is also the most glorious Mother of our Sauior and constant virgine Maâ—â—e bewtiâ—â—eng the whole celestiall courte with her comlines and bewtie compassed and accompanied with troupes of virgins as with sweete roases and lilies of the valies There be the angels and archangels placed in order who moste cheerefullie sound forth the praises of God â— There bee the Patriarches and Prophets euen theie which beeing filled long ago with the holie Ghost did foretell of Christ his comming whome nowe theie both knowe and euermore confesse to be their Lord and Sauior the King of kings and perfect God There theie behold eie to eie their Redeemer whome long theie looked for and for whose comming theie longed There be the Lordes Apostles and Disciples those most reuerend and renowmed Fathers which were filled with holines and grace and laide a strong foundacion of the Catholique faith There especiallie shineth that reuerend man Iohn which baptized our Sauior Christ and was a speciall freend of my Spouse There is Peter and Paule and Andrewe and Philip and Thomas and Iames and Iohn and all the other Apostles and Euangelistes pillers of the Church To keepe the faith and to follow the example of these men is the readie waie vnto euerlasting life Moreouer there be the valiant Martyrs enriched with their proper blood and euerlastinglie blessed with Christ whose bodies though theie were most cruellie flean yet could not their soules by anie torments be seuered from Christ. Also there be the noble Confessors which contemned this present life that theie might be in heauen There be the great and glorious Doctors that were so carried aloft in contemplation of which many haue left a liuelie image of holines in their wrightings There be yong men and
mercie and in louing O Sauior to whome none is to be compared thou art aboue all to be loued and to be worshipped O Sonne of God by whome wee are also the sonnes of God and of whome we are called Christians thou art of all good men to be serued most religiouslie and aboue all O freend of all freends King of heauen and earth Lord of angels conqueror of diuels drawe mee after thee least I fall and so rest vnder the heauie burden of sin Poure out thy grace send mee thy comfortable dewe from aboue that trulie I maie perceaue how thou art the procurer and the open fountance of all mercie L. I am in deede the spring of holie loue and of chaste and religious feare of godlie conference and of sweete consolation Therefore when you doo heare my name reioice with your whole hart and magnifie the goodnes of your God In honoring mee you honor the Father which is God as I am For I am Iesus the Sonne of God and this name shal I haue while the world endureth But what is Iesus euen the Sonne of the liuing God the Sauior of the world the King of heauen and earth the Lord of Angels the redeemer of the faithfull and the iudge of quick and dead And what is Iesus the hope of the godlie the comfort of the desolaâ—e the peace of the meeke the riches of the poore the glorie of the humble the strength of the weake the waie of such as wander the light of such as see not the staff of such as walke not the oile of such as feele not the staie of the oppressed the helpe of the troobled and the singular refuge of all good men Blesse the Sonne with the Father and so God will blesse you Giue honor also and glorie to the Father whensoeuer you praise mee His glorie is my ioie and my praise is his worship Place mee and the Father as a seale vpon thine hart and as a token vpon thine arme Therefore sit you or stand you or praie or reade or wright or worke you let my name Iesus and God be often reuerendlie in your mouth but continuallie in your harte S. O grante it maie be so good Iesus and let all people tribes and tonges serue thee and let all creatures bowe at thy presence Let heauen saie Raigne thou Iesus let the earth make answere yea for euer and euer let him raigne Yea let all Sanctes confesse thy glorious Name and all good people reioice before the Father and thee his lambe and our Lord Iesus Christ Amen CHAP. 25. That for God his benefits we are to thanke him BLessed be the glorious Name of the Lord for euermore O Lord my God let all my dooings all my reading all my wrighting my thoughtes words and vnderstanding tend vnto the aduancement of thine honor Yea let mee both begin my busines in thy Name and goe forward in thy feare and finish it with thy blessing That which thou hast giuen that receaue againe and from whence the streames doo flowe thether let them returne It neuer goeth better with mee neither dooth it realish better to my soule than when vnfeinedlie I doo ascribe all to thee whatsoeuer I haue either doon or thought as I should My desire is to render thankes which I then doo as I ought when for that I haue receaued and thou hast giuen I ascribe all praise to thee and nothing to my selfe For what can I a wicked and vnprofitable seruant render vnto thee my God Alas all that I can doo yea if I should doo all which thou commandest to be doon it is to none effect So that I am brought vnto nothing and rightlie humbled And in deede it is verie well that I am so brought downe that thou alone maist bee iustified and haue the praise of all and that vile dust maie at no time glorie in it selfe Howbeit I minde not to surcesse but will extoll thee both with hart and mouth For albe I discharge not my dutie therein as I ought yet ought I to speake of thy goodnes and not be silent O my God thou art my glorie my praise shall alwaies be of thee He that would but a little consider of thy glorie and knowe what it is to glorie in the Lord how would he despise all outward glorie He that would euen but a little taste of thy sweetnes how quicklie would he loath as most bitter the pleasure of this world He which would receaue euen but a small sparcle of loue into his breaste howe would hee burne in affection For full gladlie would hee contemne all thinges to haue thy freendship and would count it all sweete and easie to be borne whatsoeuer he should doo or suffer for thy loue sake Hee that would consider in his minde thy goodnes to man-ward how would he reioice and run after thee Hee would seeke nothing so charelie he would keepe nothing so warelie he would pursue nothing so egerlie as to serue thee For in louing he would feele no burden because loue would beare all burdens So then theie which complaine of the burden doo plainlie declare how theie haue litle true loue in them To serue of loue is of all others the greatest pleasure and comfort in labor True loue dooth neither respect commoditie nor feare damage but in all things seeketh that which may please thee Oah Christ how sweete is thy loue how well dooth it sound how sweetlie dooth it enter how stronglie dooth it binde Oah that it would fast binde mee to thy continuall seruice oah that it would wholie take me and wholie subdue me and wholie and altogether make me to be thine For then and not before am I free when I am taken of thy loue and vtterlie depriued from all that mine is O my Lord I am thy seruant yea thy seruant am I because thou hast redeemed mee I am thy seruant with a verie good will and am not ashamed to be properlie thine I wish not to be mine owne man againe and therefore Lord helpe mee that I maie be freed from that which naturallie is mine Oah blowe and kindle and inflame the fire of my zeale so shall mine hart boile and become pure cleare and pleasant for thy loue expelleth vice and consumeth sin Laie thou fast hold vpon the band of loue and I shall stand and continue in thy seruice Full well I wot no good can my seruice doo you Lord but all the benefit redoundeth to my selfe if I doo that which I knowe is acceptable in thy sight Would I did and hid not that I reuealed and concealed not thy workes Lord When shall I be able worthelie to consider the manifold benefits conferred vpon mee of God! Mercifullie hast thou delt with thy seruant ô Lord but alack I neuer thanked thee for the same as thou deseruedst And therefore am