and highly praising their Husbands liberality when perchance they were the presents that some welcome servant had gratified them with From themselves they proceed to descant on their neighbours and good lack what faults they found every where Mrs Almond the Confectioners wife is much set behind because shee wanted a good Dresser and never was pinn'd handsomely but her things stood awry Mrs Figg the Grocers wife as much condemn'd that she had not yet left off her Hat and put her selfe into a Bag and such a one had spoil'd all her teeth before shee was eighteen with Sweet meats that shee never durst laugh without her handkerchieffe otherwise the woman was a feat one And Mrs such a one never came abroad powder'd enough to take away the scent of her body which was the cause shee never came neer the fire But above all they admired Mrs Spruce the Parsons wife who though shee were crump'd-shoulder'd and had other imperfections yet her cloths were so neatly contriv'd that being drest shee seem'd as straight as an Arrow A good soule that and never miss'd the good wives Club though shee were tyed to religious perâ—ormances very much at home Shee was an example to the rest and carried the businesse so quickly that after a good rowze or two no more signes appear'd then if shee had been with her Good man at the Exercise Others of their sisternity very weak headed women frail vessels carried not matters so well for want of use and experience which in a short time would be perfected Then from that to childbearing and what easy labour Mrs Touch had and how pretty a boy and how kind a man Mr Touch was who let her have her will in every thing which no doubt is a great helpe toward the facilitating those matters It is so tender a soul that if she should but look awry 't would make her miscarry for she is true Touch and never misses And then to the differences of Midwives how comfortable Dame Short would speak concerning patience and stoutnesse in those cases before shee had drank Sack and Sugar and after it how fluently her tongue walk'd untill the time came to shew her skill which shee alwaies perform'd with such successe and was so skilfull in Phisnomy that those signes and resemblances which we poor women could never discerne were made so apparent to our Husbands that they found the child to be their own by the countenances and those marks which Dame Short gave them to take notice of It hath been fifty pieces in her way at times from the good men those discoveries which are great satisfactions and most sure restrainers of jealousie Other Dames on the contrary are heavy and dull without this secret too which is all in all and want speech and incouragement fit for women in those plights they are harsh and imperious also enough to scare them more then the businesse it selfe From such Midwives good Lord deliver me and when the time shall come againe saith Mrs Clippochopo Let Mrs Short be for my labour I love a short cut of it It will not be long first saith Corpulent Mr Clippochopo do's it to a haire and to that good houre or whosoe'r it shall be next we fat women are not so good Breeders 't is true but we envy not your forwardnesse as shall appeare by this full Carowse and to you Steepen Malten to the next rise amongst us be it right or wrong Softly that said Dame Suteur All this time the Knights play'd it at Dutch Gleek and had so vied it and revied it that they were all Honours in their faces and Toms by their stradling and now they are for their Tibs who had plaid faire and made never a Reneg all the time The Knights went every one first to his owne Lady and then his friends and did so smouch them that the lippe-frolicks were heard into the Kitchin which fetch'd up mine Host who very much welcom'd his Noble Guests and joy'd to see the strong affections they bore to one another He ask'd their Ladiships what refection they would have before bed-time All were for a Sack Posset you shall have one you may swimme in said mine Host Quickly then said the Ladies with expedition Madam and with spice enough In this space they agree to ly in the grand bed and to avoid errors they dispos'd of themselves for the first paire female on the out side of Male Male next to that Male then two females next two Males and a Female utmost Thus they made all secure by the contrivance of their wives whose judgements at the instant were the quicker Fresh lights brought up came a Cauldron of Posset which the Host fully satisfied of their quality had besprinkled with some Pulvis Crepitorius the Inne-keeper staid and saw such mannerly feeding that he bless'd himselfe and thankt Heaven that posset was no meat that he lik'd much good doe you Gallants said he this is lusty stuffe warme and wholesome True Myn-here quoth Steepen Malten we shall not heare of this againe But for your goods quoth mine Host and wishing them good rest he sent his maids to attend them to bed Foure handsome Girles presently appeared and proffered their service but the Ladies desired only to know the places of conveniencies and so dismissed them And with good speed they did Abigail it each to others untill all being ready for bed they had very much ado to make the Knights laden with posset and Canary to observe the order of their bed-postures as was prescribed After a small rest the Posset work'd with a powder and from the north side of the bed Steepen Malten gave such a warning piece that alarum'd all the quarters neare her and Corpulenta being her selfe a petty garrison returned two guns for one Daplusee and Clippochopo laughing so violently at it broke into consent with them and did peale it about and sometimes ring the Changes so merrily that the continuall noise wak'd the dull Knights who no sooner stirred but Flounder Ferkin gave a broad side which almost spoiled all the tackling of the bed and now the other three upon the report of the last like Block-houses did so play their great Guns that there was nought but smoke and stench the Wind being in every ones Face It was a night of high service and great action but the wind a little appeased a storme came suddenly the men running to the Close-stooles the women to the Looking or Leaking-glasses where they sate not so sweet as Roses and Flowers in a garden-pot but wondring at the mischances each complained and heard one anothers tailes very dolefully crying It was never so with me before O I have plaid the beast saith another Daplusee could not hold but went to it without measure and Dame Clipp wished for her husbands Bason these utensils would not conteine Insomuch that they were enforced to the Chimneys where like Hawkes on a perch they slic'd it while their Males were for
wise uptakes That matter and finding his stomack high Desires with bread and Cheese to pacifie His great distemper and by perswasion Upon the Crust and Caus he makes invasion TEXT SANCHO prayed with all his heart Somewhat of kinne was Sancho to the Sea-men who seldome pray but in a Tempest and the prayers much alike Vt optatâ potiantur areâ—â As saylors pray at Sea to see the dry lands So Sancho prays that he may have his Iland These are not adventures of Ilands but of thwartings The pitcher doth not goe so often to the well but sometimes it comes home broken This Proverbe if the Spaniard had understood it would have suited very well with the Don who very much at present ressembled the Hieroglyphick having eares Ana. It is the right discipline of Knight-Errantry to be rudimented in losses at first and to have the Tyrocinium somewhat tart Those prove your surest veterani and hardest Knights who have smarted for their experience The castigation of the lackeys the unfavourable but auspicious hoyst of the Windmils for in the elevation he saw all the Castles he was to conquer and Sancho's Iland too the eare-ring of the Biscaine for it was more than admonition were the praeludiums and tryals of his doughtinesse Ardua virtutis via And whosoever is to make his way thorow quicksets thornes and bryars may very well lose an eare in the thicket Don Quixot check'd Rosinant untill Sancho did arrive Marke the great love betwixt Sancho and the Knight and the two Brutes respectively Much like that of pothooks and dripping pan who once were at variance the one was off the hooks the other upon it was a drooping-pan but at last by meditation of Andirons parties of each side they were reconcil'd and in signe of everlasting amitie when pothooks lookt down upon dripping-pan then did dripping-pan look up upon pot-hooks Even so and so the simile is quadrate when Sancho's Asse bray'd then Rosinante neighed when Sancho out-cri'd then Don did not out-ride It were not amisse to retire to some Church Ignavi semper specie pruden â—û â— admonent Cowards are alwaies great Polititians and huge creators of dangers and safeties Sancho is afraid of hues and cries for the insultum fecit upon the Monks and a clausum fregit it had lik'd to have been if that the Pages had not come in before the Burglary committed upon his treble lock'd purse Two reasons yet Sancho had for this caution security of person and conveniency of revictualling for the provisions were far spent the wallet was emptie which made Asse and Man goe sorrowfully Sancho was short and thicke and being empty and lanck there were two wallets upon one beast He though others hate it lov'd to make a cloak-bag of his belly wherein he desired an dayes provision at least before hand for he did not use his wallets emblematically one and that the foremost should hold others vices and the hindmost his owne That dyet was for envious folkes of which number he hated to be because they were lean He lov'd all religious houses but especially the Monasteries for that the Monks were very well spread men not dwindlers but of an ample size having bodies capable for large undertakings and wherein the soule was not streightned as in pinch'd and spiny carcasses where the received aire being stifled and choakt up into a narrow compasse causeth stinking breath and many other aneusanses in the body naturall which he intended in his future Iland when he came to it to prevent I will deliver thee out of the hand of the Caldaeans how much more from the holy Brother-hood This holy Brother-hood were the Officers of the Dorps as Constables Tithing-men Bayliffs bumme or shoulder-Marshals and the like dreadfull appearances which make stop of suspicious persons vagrants under which Squire-Errants if not Knights might very well be comprehended But that Knight-Errants are for the holy sisterhood and feare no such bugbeares He that feares not the Caldaeans scorns to come before the Constable or his vigilant Capitolian Watchmen O what a valdè vult or rather a vult valdè Is here that feares nor Constable nor Caldee Prây use this lint and a little unguentum album he hath in his wallâ—â— Sancho had stolne his wives unguentum wherewith shee soder'd up the chinks in her ruinous face that poor woman for want of it and the thiefe will gape till his return like the parch'd earth in a drought A viall full of the Balsamum Fierebas Opobalsamum I pray you for a rarity of so transcendent operation This was an imaginary Balsame which was good for imaginary wounds Phantastes being ask'd in that learned play of Lingua what a man thought of when he thought of nothing answered by present strength of imagination he is thinking how to answer him that asketh nothing so for no wound no Balsamum is best This Opâ—balsamum as he would have it valued and esteemed was neer of affinity to the sympathetick powder which hath done wonderfull things A strange but true story I shall tell you of the effects of some of it A Lady fell asleep as many do with needles and pins in her mouth which she unhappily swallow'd great care there was to preserve her Physitians from the four corners are called and a Regiment of Apothecaries Chirurgions For her Knight terribly afriad of intestine turn-pikes could not rest till some remedy was found out A councell was had and no conclusive result at last a little Paracelsian Apothecary Clyster-high advised to make a Clyster with three hundred ingredients which you may read in the Pharmacopoea translated or not translated but the chiefe praedominator in the businesse was to be two graines of pulvis magneticus powder of Loadstone which having the Misceatur and Condiatur by direction was administred unto the Lady by the Pigmy Minos drest up like a Gentilewoman for more modestyes sake which wrought so appositely and sympathetically that the occult qualities of the Loadstone presently exerted and shot out their vertues through the body of the patient so vigorously that at last they fastened upon the needle which was attracted with a powder the other impulsives helping to the qua data porta and in such an instant of time that little Minos could recover himselfe from the storme of her Ladyships Posternegate which stream'd and issued so furiously that my Apothecaries face was stuck like a pinne-cushion and the needle stuck was in his nose cleer and untainted with the many Meanders that it had passed thorow The Apothecary was carried forth to the Doctors and his fellow Artists who wrote probatum to the Clyster and for the mishap no other of the function was to dâ—â—e it but himselfe the Chirurgions as their office is at Anatomies cleanly drest made his face cleane and the Knight gave him Pulvus auratus for his sympatheticus And so all parties were very well pleased Give me but a draught of the Opobalsamum and I shall though cleft
dishes to his soule as lively as if they had been at Table so that it wrought reall impressions and impulses upon his body to the motion of his hands which he manag'd as if his knife had been in it but above all his Teeth out-travell'd Sancho's and went such a swift trot that it waked his Chamber-fellowes who thought by the noyse that he was dreaming he had been in Hell wherefore about to rise and wake him they were suspended awhile by his words for ever and anon he said Sir Sir Sir pray hand the Spring of Porke to me pray advance the Rump of Beefe this way the Chine of Bacon O the Chine with your leave the Chine Sir and then the first dish againe Sir and in his Complements his Teeth kept Minnum and Semibriefe time so excellently that the persons resolv'd to wake him did lye down and laugh wonderfully pleas'd to see their friend so singularly contented in the same instant at bed and board The Scholar wak'd after a sound sleep but could remember no sport that he made nor would he believe the Auditors relations untill by wofull experience he found his Face swell'd and his Gumms so batter'd and bruised with the repercussions of his grinders that he was not able to stirre his jawes nor could be partaker of any of the good cheer except it were the liquid part of it which they call Dutch gleek where he plaied his cards so well and vied and revied so often that he had scarce an eye to see withall his guzzle recâ—npencing abundantly the want of his Teeth It figured unto him that the Litter was a Bier wherein was carried some slaughtered Knight whose revenge was reserv'd for him I wonder that Cyd Hameti Benengeli did not venture to tell us whose body the Don fancied to be there It must needs be that his high imagination ran upon some eminent Person or else he would not doubtlesse have undertook a design of so much hazard and odds and without the second Ship of Sancho who came not in at all but only to the pillage certainly he could not but conceive and strongly apprehend that the Body of that Famous Knight-Errant and Traveller Tomâ— Coriato was carrying home to great Brâ—tany being slaine by that grand Gyant of Hildeberg in a single Duell and being dead was that the Murder might not be discovered said to be the Valiant Knight of the Stand or Stoop or it may be he did and very patly conceit that the Body of Gulilmo Stivos whom we call'd Summers was conveying away who was the Knight of the Sunne or rather Colo-Paltono the huge Gyant Brother to Capitanio Ionesio who both were Knights of the Burning Pestle If none of these without doubt he must needs intend the rescue of that gallant Man of Tooth-action Don Mariotto Knight of the Inasswagable Panch whom those Inchanters Moors and Witches the Mourners and Pâ—aeficae and the singing-men whom he absolutely took for white Devils had cossâ—â—'d up unvindicated untill this present houre when a high revenge was to be inflicted by DON Repairer of injuries He said stand Sr Knight who ever you be The Don buckles to the Van of all the Army and assaults the first pittifull Scouâ—of this lamentable Body whom he should have quaeriedin this manner and in sober sadnesse demanded of him First why his Nose run so fast Secondly what a whining he kept Thirdly whether he meant to lose his eyes because he should never see his friend againe Fourthly why his friend who was out of sight might not as well be out of minde Fifthly whether he griev'd so because his friend had left the World or rather had left him nothing but the wide World Sixthly whether his mourning were a legacy or upon his owne charges that he wept so Seventhly whether the man died mad if he made him Executor and he fear'd that a caveat would be entred against the Will and in fine be overthrowne Eighthly whether he dyed and gave no Sugar-Plums Naples-Bisket burnt wine Ribbons Gloves nor Scutchions To the 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 interrogatories nihil dicit nor to a hundred more such examinations For Curaeleves loquntur ingentes stupent He was a hireling and commanded teares Not for his griefe but pay in 's eyes appears The Mourners were so muffled in their weeds that they could not stirre so that Don Quixot without any danger to his person gave them all the Bastinado He had the better of the whites in this checquer'd board now have-at the blacks the singing men were at Dirges and howl'd out for a Requiem for themselves being departed soules and scatter'd up and downe the Face of the whole Field who afrighted now but in their wits they were Fatui are only Ignes Fatui and 't is wonder that Sancho did not follow 'um up and downe the Chase instead of Will with the Wispe or Gyl burnt tayle But the Don out of all rule was measuring Spanish cloth by the speare and meant to make prize and booty of it all for it was sub hastâ It was a dismall piece of night-work and worthy the pencill of a Zeuxis Here and there lay the pittifull spoyles of the Knights of the black-robes Ribbons good twelve-penny broad hackt as small as beauty-specks Gloves cut into thumbstals Cypresse harbands shrivilled into black chitterlins or Scutcheons flew in the aire like paper-Ravens for Kites are not black enough so that the Field was all a black Heath and Rosinante embossed in the pursuit never went prouder in all his life treading all the way upon Spanish cloth of twenty shillings a yard The Passengers of the severall waies imagin'd they had been Fairies a horse-back and that the Knight the Queen 's own eldest sonne was running the Rounds after his Lady Mother for a blessing All this Sancho beheld marvelling at his Masters boldnesse Aut meus Erasmus est aut Daemon Either this is DON QVIXOT or the Devill himselfe quoth Sancho who is come to carry the body to the fellowship of his soule I doe believe the Divel 's in my Master who ever basted was till now Now 's baster Or thus For Erasmus will beare it O see the man that was the Mouse Become a vermin Montanous Doe not kill me for you will commit a great Sacriledge I being a licentiat and receiving the first orders This Licentiat was of the lower Forme of the Levites he had newly come from his Quò vos ad Glosteros Quid ibi vos ad sumendos orderos I bimus nos cum vos etiam si placet vos He had no more Latine then the Missale and that not in Capite but by book This fellow was to sing in Tone and no matter for Accents Quantities and Terminations The Latine Tongue never suffers Purgatory but in the singing mens mouths which I wonder the Pope hath no dispensation for at least a Dirge for the Tortures of the Catholick Language His Person however is sacred and his
presum'd Which I upon her did conferre 16. Thus did we blow our warm desires And words like wind increas'd the flame The papers did afford us game VVe liv'd upon fantastick fires 17. At last impatient of delaices I undertooke a deadly taske It was Luscinda stout to aske Of her Lov'd Sire and brook no naies 18. A thousand stops a thousand onwards made As damm'd to Sisyphus his stone I forward went yet back was throwne Couragious now and now afraid 19. Courage at last prevail'd and I Accosted him whom most I fear'd And told him how I was indeer'd Unto Luscinda shee to me 20. My Love was Noble and scorn'd stealth A Jewell of that value shou'd Be purchas'd by a servitude A Thiefe is Master of no wealth 21. Wherefore his liking was the band Which us yet sever'd bindes Tied fast enough in heart and mindes And for the second tye I stand 22. An answer gratious he bestow'd That I vouchsaf'd to honour his And made his only pledge my blisse And sugred language plenty flow'd 23. Then with a gravity he said Cardenio still thy Father lives Both Parents legal consent gives Let him but say 't and thine 's the Maid 24. Such wings the Answer gave my soule That I was straight-way flying home But thither when I joyfull come Strange news my wavering Fates controule 25. As I my due approaches made Resolv'd to aske Luscinda Wife Duke Ricards Letter as my life He bid me read my Rise was laid 26. Cardenio look you there the Duke I know not whence the occasion is Courts you unto his Court in this As in a glasse your fortunes looke 27. None of the least Grandees of Spaine But yet in Andaluzia chiefe Duke Ricard was that my beliefe In his great Offers were not vain 28. The Invitation it was high No lesse then be companion Unto Duke Ricards eldest sonne Few were so fortunate as I 29. And as I read my heart did swell Dilated with the joyfull news Fond Fool I too ambitious Thought happinesse at Court did dwell 30. But then my Father strook me dumb Saying Cardenio yet two dayes Thy welcome person with us stayes And then for Court thy time is come 31. These were too bigge for one poor Breast Nor could I keep them but my faire Luscinda was to keep her share That Cabinet became them best 32. With these a thousand kisses past And promises of constancy And teares did issue from her eye And cry'd pray heaven thy Love doe last 33. Cardenio and with that a sigh Take heed Cardenio of the Court It hath my love no good report And thou art young and absent I. 34. Absent Luscinda didst thou see Where thou full deep engraven art thou 'dst find thy picture in my h'art Cardenio said I live by thee 35. Then grasping her faire hand he vow'd A constancy so firme and sure Angelick Formes should not allure If they more faire could be allow'd 36. Nay nay Cardenio you 're at Court Luscinda blushing said And by those colours Truth it made Which he devised in Loves sport 37. But envious Time cut off the rest Of pretty talk their lips doe now Transact all closely seale and vow And unto secresie are prest 38. Parted at length with much a doe By the quaint'st language of the eye A thousand farewels you might spie If you doe know the Art to woe 39. Her Father now was come and put An end to all but thoughts Salutes did passe and both besought That time true-Loves knot might not cut 40. The good old Man could nought denye For on Luscinda he did dote And as she would he pass'd his vote Lest crossing her should make her dye 41. VVith these good Auspices rejoyc'd To the Dukes Court Cardenio flies VVhere all regard well justifies The Duke did Love him as 't was voic'd 42. Honour'd byâ—h ' Duke and 's eldest sonne But envied of the followers I found that flatteries and feares Possessed wholly every one 43. It 't was too much they thought that I Should in the Father and the sonne Hold such a strong affection That they me nothing would deny 44. But when they saw Lord Ferdinand The second sonne of Duke Ricard Shew me such Love such high Regard They fawn'd on that they cann't withstand 45. And then as the known Favorite I often was applyed unto And praises heard which were not due In which more danger is then spight 46. Don Ferdinand did so exceed In his exalted Love that nought He fear'd or lov'd his very thought He did impart I was his Creed 47. Not his own Brother would he trust Though they did love most deare With what he whisper'd in my eare And once admit retain I must 48. So dangerous the secrets are Of Princes that they fire the brest Where they lye lodg'd as a dark nest And if divulg'd they make a Warre 49. But that which touch'd Lord Ferdinand Was an unequall love he bare Unto a Virgin rich and Faire A Farmers daughter of the Land 50. He told me all the passages Of his long Suit and how the maid Could by no Arts be once betrai'd Nor would give eare to wanton pleas 51. Which forc'd him to a solemne oath Made only to intrap her soule For he intended actions foule Yet swore they would be married both 52. Then what my power was I tried And with perswasion strong disswade His further hanckring on the maid Which all his honour vilified 53. What would a Lord of so high blood Such expectations from abroad Take up a daughter of the road And in a barne Nurse up his brood 54. What talke would this be in his owne And what in other Princes Courts Where your two names should be their sports And the whole Table of the Towne 55. What a defeat might it chance prove Unto the Dukes contriv'd designes If to some forreign Prince he mindes To send you for a Noble Love 56. O Sr that gallant master are Of Valour not to be envied Nor equall'd let a worthy pride Make you disdaine this humble Ware 57. Don Ferdinand fear'd this loyall friend Might as he meant disclose his mind Unto the Duke He then did wind As if toth ' Sure he 'd put an end 58. Cardenio see thou hast o'rcome So Potent are thy words so true That I the mischiefs will ensue Foresee thy reasons strike me dumb 59. Come let us fly temptations strong They cannot follow where we 'l goe For none but thee and I will know Where we 'l retire from Love and wrong 60. Thy City Famous is for breed Of the great Horse under pretence Of buying thesâ— we will get hence And with new work our Fancy feed 61. When he once nam'd my Native place You would not think with what content His plot did please me for I went Joy'd I might see Luscindas face 62. My Lord said I y' have Counsell'd right Absence and businesse will estrange And often minds with places change Out of our thought once out of
the promotion of a Barber Surgeon to a Doctor Things done by wiser men then Don Quixot they will confer their Plaster-boxes and poor Sancho and thy selfe shall no longer be tied to that poor refuge of Pisse and Oaken leaves Thou must wit that desire of finding the Madman alone brings me not into these parts so much As for that he meant to turne Mad man himselfe Now whether a man may abdicate his reason renounce his understanding for a time and discover if not discover'd no reasonable Acts whereby a man should not undifference him from a Beast and live and enjoy himselfe in the sensitive part alone is a hard matter to determine and harder to doe To counterseit Madnesse is ordinary and to be really so more Bedlam affords you these the streets if not better places the other After Death the Pythagoreans averr'd a transmigration of Soules into new Bodies and oftentimes entred the Soule of a Philosopher into a Goose shifted Alexanders gallant Spirit into a Dottrell and such like changes as Lucian or such abusive Forges had a fancy to fashion 'um in But these are fantasticall conceits our Don is reall he will put off the Man and put on the Beast only reserve to himselfe the benefit of Speech which whether man have or not have he cannot be said to be out of his Senses for the matter Strong passions left too long unsuppress'd may overthrow the temper of the braine and totally subvert the rationall parts and some paisions counterfeited long whether of griefe or joy have so alter'd the personaters that players themselves who are most usually in such employments have been forc'd to fly to Physick for cure of the disaffection which such high penn'd humours and too passionately and sensibly represented have occasion'd I have knowne my selfe a Tyrant comming from the Scene not able to reduce himselfe into the knowledge of himselfe till Sack made him which was his present Physick forget he was an Emperour and renew'd all his old acquaintance to him and it is not out of most mens observation that one most admirable Mimicke in our late Stage so lively and corporally personated a Changeling that he could never compose his Face to the figure it had before he undertook that part The Knight of the Ill-favour'd Face had much done to his hand in his intended Emigration for counterfeiting there was not much need if hunger did not make a revocation of his little wits at any time For Crabs Hawes Acornes Berries agreeing naturally with his complexion and embetter'd his Face to all purposes I doe believe it 't was possible for the Don for a certaine time to lose his Wits and to revoke so much as he parted withall and be not a grain the wiser at their returne Have I not told thee already saith Don Quixot that I mean to follow Amadis by playing the despaired Wood and Mad man The example of Amadis is very autorative with our Don but why he should rather labour to imitate him in this fit of Madnesse then-in any other of his magnanimous Acts is very strange no it is not so strange but a common thing When did you see a wise example followed by many or any Let it alone 't is grave stanch and singular Thin are the appearances at Gresham Colledge when the Bearegarden the Cock pit is thrung'd with Company If Bartholmew Faire should last a whole year not Pigs not Puppet playes would ever be surfeited of The wenches could live and dye with Jack-pudding what flocking of good wives and Pickpockets to a Ballad or if at any time a Mad man have broke his custody he shall have more followers then pittiers Our Don is of this number who cannot read of a mad prank buâ— he must augment the sport and rather then hee 'l have no part in the Stage hee 'l play the mad man I believe quoth Sancho the Knights which performed the like pennance had some reason for their austerities c. Insanio cum ratione To play is allowable quoth Sancho I have lost my Asse for me to be beside my selfe were a pardonable thing But for you who have lost nothing but the way home and your wits why should you be madder yet who have a Mistresse Lady Queen what doe you call 'um that is secure of her honour whom no Prince Knight Inchanter Moor nor the Devill himselfe would come neer Why should you run mad unlesse that 't is your good hap to have such a singular piece that you need never be jealous never keep a spie never use Italian gimcrack or any restraint upon and doe you therefore surfeit of happinesse and are mad because you have no cause to be so Amadis had a powting slut a sullen huzzy he should have curried her Coat and ne'r run mad for it Our Mary Gutierez when shee was in the Mubbleâ—ubles doe you thinke I was mad for it no no I took my Asse O that I could doe so now and went to the next good Town and let it Jubble out as it Mubbled in Orlando indeed had some reason to be mad Angelica made him horne mad now here 's some cause But you are an obstinate Mad man and will be Mad because you will be so Dulcinea del Tobosâ— having not given you the least occasion The wit is in waxing mad without a cause Herein the Don is paradoxicall and singular and will make himselfe the first Inventer de Arte Amentandi though he gaine but few followers now by frequent private practises upon himselfe as by being quarter Mad halfe Mad and three quarters Mad upon severall experiments is the full Midsommer Moon madnesse to be attain'd unto No doubt he had pass'd the three first tryals and was very neer his perfection The first quarter it is totty freekish the second phantasticall melancholy and suspitious the third quarrelsome and injurious and then pure phreneticall Our Knight is now in the increase he hath but a wild dispatch or two to Toboso and you shall have him in the full and then he 's for the King of Spaine and Dulcinea del Toboso For he that shall heare you name a Barbers Bason Mambrino's Helmet Sancho in this censure discovereth his Masters aptnesse and preparednesse for the incounter of Pennance and that he was a Knight of so great curiosity that he went the most appointed and disappointed unto any adventure of any Knight in the World being at that time the only Knight-mark of the East and West and alone acted in the empty Theatre of the World Captaine Iones was many years since downe in the Annals and now to see when his head should be busie composing Love-letters to Dulcinea his Heroick braines are working where he may finde some wand'ring Tinker to mend that scarre of the broken Helmet But dull-pate his man upon the strength of sensitive observations cannot be perswaded out of his errour that it was a Bason O curvae in Terras animae his Soule was as disordered
then you must use holy meanes and the assistance of devout persons and prayers to disinchant you the Church in such cases hath not lost the power of Exorcisme But the remedy you seek is worse then the disease to give your wife to the Divell Body and Soule because a part of yours is impedited by his ministers Or if your frigidity be from the Winter of your age you know warme clothes fires and good Cordials make us insensible of sharp weather and these naturall faylings of your yearâ— may be happily repair'd by lawfull helps strengthening juices fomentations baths and the like and what you think impossible as from your dry stock being water'd open'd at root and lopp'd and all seasonable care taken may bloom and bring forth fruit without inoculating But supposing not granting the difficulty of restoring what is decay'd will your like an overladen Tree be propt up with a fork know you not the barren bed is better then a quiver full of ill-headed Arrows Will you to please the Europa Metamorphoze your selfe into a Bull a very Centaure halfe man halfe beast Such a Monster is he made whosoever voluntarily or involuntarily hath lost the propriety in his wife But a resignation is most unmanly and impious How can two indispensable vows and bonds be by consent broken unlesse one may consent to doe what he hath articled never to doe how can you permit your wife to be a Whore unlesse you misplace or misunderstood the words for better for worse Againe would you give another leave to call you what you make your selfe or your wife by that title which you have impos'd upon her or if your spurious designe prosper not would you try the Piatza over and make your selfe Notissima Fabula mundo You have vow'd to be hers she likewise to be yours and what shall be borne of her to be both yours and hers A stranger intervening breaks all these ingagements you plainly with a de jure cedere cutting off your own intaile as to your progeny and dispossessing your selfe of tenancy for life The wife is made juris alieni and the children which of all our goods we account most our own Iuris publici Bastards are the Common-Wealths children and therefore theirs because nor Father nor Mother would owne them but expos'd them to the publike charity And will a man of your discretion a Senatour and publique Father priviledge that at home which you would severely punish in such incontinent persons abroad Impotentio was very much disturb'd with these rebukes and reasons but yet not disswaded which change of looks Casimire taking for a remorse and outward signe of inward compunction did not farther nettle him but said the conviction of your forehead puts me in hopes of the conversion of your heart which I hope is alter'd by this discourse from your first intentions A blessing on the cure and so giving him his benediction the good Father departed full of hopes and joy for his new convert Impotentio waited on him fearing his wife might be inquisitive to learn some what of him but the good Father knew that such discoveries though not in confession were of dangerous consequence if reveal'd and therefore with a look as cheerfull as when he came first having given a Benediction to his daughter freed from suspition by his plausible countenance he repair'd to his Covent Impotentio champt upon this bit of Casimires a day or two but with like successe as Mules and Horses who are imboss'd foame and chafe the more He remembred Quod valâ—è cupiunt senes meminerint benè That he had often commerc'd with a Merchant of Angli-terra a Gentleman youthfull handsome and ingenious in very high credit on the Piatza and on whom the Clarissimo's many of them cast an eye of more then ordinary regard and often call'd him to their Tables The gentleman was a single man and very rich so that Impotentio promised to himselfe successe if his vigilant wife were not impregnable nor to be surpris'd The next Exchange his fortune was to meet him and having saluted each the other the Clarissimo desired him to honour his house that day with his company at meale Sanguine Vernall such was the Merchants name intimating his unworthinesse of so high respect said he should hereafter endeavour to make himselfe capable and for the present he would be indebted for the entertainment Our Merchant was not acquainted with the Venetian humor therefore summon'd up all his cautionary rules circumstances and counsels which either his friends or his own observations had enrich'd him withall and having heard very much of the fame of the old Signiors Lady her beauties and accomplishments he resolv'd to double arme himselfe and set a watch upon his eye and tongue for there was subject enough for either to be luxurious on From the Piatza they went off together to Impotentio's house which was one of the stateliest buildings of the City a Receipt for a Prince but that it entertain'd a Goddesse for Euphema comming into the dining Room so transported our Merchant with her lustre that he knew not presently whether he should salute or worship But presently restor'd by the melting Corall of her lip he sate down with civill confidence inwardly admiring the severall confluences of graces that his eye beheld and could no where but there behold At dinner he durst not let his eye beguile his mouth nor wander on the womens side which made him eat like a Mad man not minding what he took nor how it went downe and Euphema as shee was an excellent dissecter of the Creature carving to him some speciall fowle the puzled wight gave her his us'd plate instead of the servant The Clarissimo gave him the boon cheer in a lusty glass of Wine which being by one of the Gentlemen presented to him it was his wish the glass had been the spire of a Steeple and as narrow as a pin-case for all that while he might have viewed unsuspected the Face which had set his heart on fire not to be quench'd by such a glass though it had been fill'd with Alpine water Wherefore imputing the slowness of his draught to the goodness of the Wine which was to be drank with no hasty but with deliberate pallat he said Signior other Clarissimo's drink Wine but you Nectar and a Philoxenus's neck were not an ill wish to him who would take a right Gustow of it And craving another glass he presented health and happinesse to the Lady of the place The Table 's remov'd Clarissimo and Vernall retir'd into a very faire Garden and a little behind that they enter'd a grove of Trees and delicate walks every where betwixt ' um The Trees were so plac'd that their Armes shot into one another and were so closely interwoven that the vernant and aestivall Sunne beames could not pierce their rare imbroydery In this secret of the house Clarissimo will now disclose his intentions Such designes as these were Lucifugous
Earth intimated that the Powers above would send 'um both to answer it below Euphemae hearing the Pistoll goe off came into the room in her Night-dresse and a black Velvet Mantle over her with a Book in her hand but beholding the sad mishap of her bleeding servant shee ranne in to her succour Impotentio was directing his Rapier unto her Breast when Sanguine untill then melancholy interpos'd himselfe betwixt her and the imminent danger beseeching the Clarissimo to abandon such a mischiefe which though it happily befell that Hell-Cat yet this act would never be forgiven above or find pardon amongst men But Impotentio raging with revenge and with eyes and hands menacing that what was now intercepted should not long be deferr'd spurning at her with language sharper then his Rapiers point and more wounding said Whore have you us'd me thus Shee turn'd her head about from the Negro and only replyed my Lord that word is not yet my due and I have done all this that it may never be and that your name may not be read in the vaine Register of easie natur'd men or mine amongst that of over-kinde Ladies Then turning on her knees to Sanguine said Sir you that have been so Noble as to save my life by a hazardous interposition of your person proceed to higher vertue and save protect and vindicate that which unto me is dearer and ought to be so to every generous soule a fame unspotted a chast Breast and the honour of a yet undefiled bed Here are but two of you and three Thieves and Murderers My Husband and then shee wept abundantly will posterity believe it of a Husband seeks to kill me for that he should wish me a thousand lives And both of you the worst of Robbers have conspir'd to deprive me of a Jewell the Heavens bestow'd on me and I have vow'd to keep Have you not read Sir turning to her Husband you may not kill Look on this fainting Maid whose intentions to preserve chastity argues her soule not of the same hue with her course outside and proves you foule within and the worse Negro Have you not read young Gentleman sure did you goe further then the sixth Commandement a prohibition against this very sinne will you turne journey-man to the Divell take heed Shee would have said more but Impotentio heated with rage unhand me friend I pray you but a moment and with looks full of Italian malice said are you preaching Mistresse Knipper-Dolin yet heare me and obey me too or take this Gentleman or death Then looking toward the bed nodded and said that or the grave and so biting his thumbes a sign of fixt and determin'd cruelty he left her calling for a servant to draw off the Moor and conveigh her to a lodging where for want of timely dressing shee almost expir'd All but Sanguine and Euphema were remov'd who took her gently from her knees weeping and imploring Heaven for protection In pure desire Lady of saving Christian blood for Pagan is already split I prosecute said he your Husbands will Be not O be not your selfe-Murderer In your refusall life and honour 's lost Think you your Husband will preserve your Fame Who would not spare your life will he not say To vindicate himselfe you did that thing Which you abhorr'd life for so kills you twice For not doing that which done you'â— sure to live Who shall who can reveale your forc'd complyance Whom doe you wrong your Husband is most willing How many doe the same without consent Only for itch of change for no good end As this of yours yours is another case To prosecute the end of Marriage Barr'd in your Husbands confess'd impotence If I should faile ten thousand sinns are in 't But Lady be as sure of that successe As if you felt the glorious Embryon swell In your increased Orb. Those are no Whores Whose Husbands hire supplies and hold the doors Euphema hearing his blasphemies and Hell-borne Rhetorick fell againe on her knees and desir'd his pardon that shee had given him leave to suspect her Faith and chastity by giving eare to his loose and impious discourse then calling Heaven to witnesse and assist her constancy shee drew from that part where her buske was us'd to be plac'd a Ponyard and turning the point upon her selfe shee spoke these as shee thought her last lines That in my soule I may n't dye Negro-like When I command thee trusty Ponyard strike And tremble not pure hanâ—s your cure is good To let before it be corrupted blood How oft have I you two to Heaven up-lift That thither you lift mee 's my only drift Open the way that my imprison'd soule Returne as it came thence a spotlesse scrowle I gave you once into anothers power Now I resume you to my owne devoyr As nature made me my defence and Guard Giving one blow a hundred worse you ward Commanded men their Captaine must obey Then strike the word is given Euphema slay At which words Sanguine was bloodlesse and kneeling to her said Madam if you persist in this desperate resolution I will not live a minute after you and will dye by the same Ponyard mixing at least our bloods thus which might have been done another way to more content on both sides Then with eyes full of Majestick horror and lovely desperatenesse shee said I have a word or two to speak and then farewell I guesse you are a single man whose sports Are the base boasted vanquishing those Forts That yield to your assaults those that repell Your lustfull stormes bely'd you take as well So that all Ladies Credits you abuse The honest by your slander those you use After and in the Fact your obscaene Tongue Spreading abroad the home-made nasty dung Delighting in your shame I shall take care To keep our bodies cleane and your tongue faire But tell me Sir it is my last request Are you with Mother or a Sister blest With both best Lady replied Sanguine and both are in the holy state of Matrimony but biting his lips said privately that word holy might have been well omitted she proceeded thus And dost thou love and honour them you do But wouldst thou count them worth it if you knew The one had wrong'd thy Fathers bed or she Who doubtlesse hath her graces if of thee She hath as much as face were at this time Doing what I do deprecate This Crime Me thinks I see a noble fire arise And glorious sparkes in thy incensed eyes 'Gainst them and their deflourers Sanguine was somewhat startled at her quaeries yet as for his mother he was secure being on the worst side of fifty But his Sister was very young and deare to him and at that time about his breast hung her Picture set in a rich Ovall which recalled her to his memory fresh as if she had been present which he was willing to divert and therefore he desired her Ladyship to presse these points no farther unlesse in bed
advis'd who allayed his spirit of contradiction and submitted to the Whifling Knight-Errant with the Ill-favour'd face Don Ferdinand intreated the Captive to recount unto him the History of his life And here indeed follows a story will captivate the hearer it being full of fine changes of misfortunes and as sweet and pleasing conclusion for Phillida hath her Corydon and Corydon hath his Phillida It ' is praeter institutum not my intention to undertake these serious stories but as before with an exchange which will be no robbery only the Argument I shall present unto you of the 12 13 and 14 Chapters and so proceed to the Barter like some simple Concionator who naming his Text in a Country Auditory shut the book and took leave of it for the whole houre as if it had been a dangerous thing and not to be handled CHAP. XII XIII XIIII Old Perez of Viedma out of Lyon Sent forth three sonnes which the whole world had eye on The Father squar'd his state quadri-partite And left himselfe but a childs portion right Three way 's his old Mercuriall fingers show'd And each one was to honor'd ends a rode The Church the Seas the Court high waies all three By three made good Wit Valour Industry Each sonne took's severall track But Ruy Perez The craggy path where Honour linck'd with feare is Our Captiv's for the Wars and his first tryall Was fiery but of engagement royall Have you not heard of that great Navall fight Sped 'fore Lepanto when the Turks Moon light Was so eclips'd that the proud Ottoman Resign'd his title to the Ocean Thinking his Prophet false and Christs command Was o'r the Seas but Mahomets on the Land But the next yeare Don John of Austria Prov'd Mahomet a Lyar every way And by the losse of Tunez the Turks found Their Prophet could secure nor Seas nor ground In those brave services our Captiv's lot Was to be ta'n while others Lawrell got Not basely ta'n for John Andraeas Gally Sail'd to the succour 'gainst the proud Uchally Of Malta's Admirall distress'd there he Was Captaine there he shew'd his company A piece of Valour and alone did leap Vnseconded upon a Barbarous heap Of Turks who fearing our supplies away Sail'd from the assault proud of this single prey Honour'd Viedma glorious in they chaines Tugging at the Oare a most ignoble paines Doth not disturle thy worthy soule prepar'd For anything that 's high and also hard But the Goleta and the Fort Don John Built for a stop toth ' Turks ambition Lost in thy sight and Christian blood Flowing about the Trenches where it stood Thy Countrymen like dogs interr'd and those Hardy Commanders did their lives expose Don Pedro De Puerto Generall And learn'd and stout Don Pedro o' Argivall Both taken both the glory of thy Spaine Thy heart broke then to see those in a chaine Then slavery was slavish and their Oares More wound thee then the strokes of Turks and Moors Uchali Fertax the scall'd Runnagate So was he nick-nam'd by the Turkish state Dy'd after this defeat and a third part Of all his wealth and slaves an Ottoman Art Practis'd along by th' Roman Emperors Went to the Turk his sure inheritour In that division Azanaga got A thousand slaves and he was of his lot The Kingdome of Argiers the Turk bestow'd Vpon this runnagat thus honours flow'd Vpon a Catamite Porus to his Prince A Ship-boy first and now his Eminence In our new chaines and caps Him and his Peeres We ro'd with merry looks unto Argeirs Not for his greatnesse joy'd but 'cause that Spaine Was neer and might once more be seen again Which Heaven procur'd for unsuccessefull we ' Said often to escape but 't would not be But this was providence indeed a Moor Of great account and of excessive store Liv'd next the Baths a place for their best slaves Where hopes of ransome the poor captive saves Amidst these Baths as at Bethesdas Pool An Angell did refresh our fainting soule Vpon the Prison Battlements we us'd To walk and thence our sighs and Prayers transfus'd Toth ' Powers above observ'd it seems we were From the Moores windowes whence there did appear A Cane with something to'â— The Cane did play Full upon us and pointed to our way One of our company did step aside And to our waving Meteor neer applied At his approach the blest Phaenomenon Drew in its selfe as if it would be gone As he retreated it again shot forth Then went a Gentleman of noble worth With like successe and so the third the Cane Wav'd off and made their hopes and prosers vaine Our Captive was the last who knows said he Whether this Omen be reserv'd for me Or whether fortune hath a proud intent To play upon us by some instrument He tri'd his luck and the descending Lint Fell from the Cane with ten Zianiys in 't A crosse of Canes was then put out which sign Made us of Christian Captive there divine Who pittying our estate lent these supplies Wishing her selfe and us quick liberties And after it a glorious hand appeares So white that it dismiss'd all jealous feares Then in the Turkish manner we inclin'd Our heads in token of a thankfull minde This for a time cheer'd up our hearts and we Nothing omitted of discovery To know the place from whence our Golden shower Descended but alas it rain'd no more A noble Moor Arguimorato calâ—'d And Constable of Pata late install'd Liv'd there and that was all which we could learn Nor hand nor Cane nor Crosse could long discerne At last our Phosphorus restor'd the day And chas'd dull thoughts from our sad hearts away The Cane like to a blazing Starre Crinite Greater appear'd but yet did not affright We try'd as once before whose it might be But it prov'd only falling starre to me I gather'd up the Deodate good Gold And a white paper did our blisse infold Wrote in Arabian tongue not understood By any of us so we only shew'd Signes that wee 'd read it and the Crosse was kiss'd Before her eyes and that the hand dismiss'd O now for a secure Interpreter Who might our mystick happinesse transferre A Murcian Runnagate one of sure trust And long experience this unravell must The fellow vow'd all faith and secrecy And render'd it in Spanish presently The joy'd contents declar'd that the white hand A Christians was and long'd for Christian land Daughter unto the Moor train'd up by one A Christian Captive in Religion And since her death for twice shee had appear'd Shee charg'd me be by Lela-Marien steer'd And shee would bring me to her fonne the God That came from Heaven and there makes his abode Shee would direct me she a Husband give With whom I should in shining Goshen live And thou brave Christian above all the rest Hast made a Conquest of my Virgin breast Thy manly gate thy presence in thy chaines Shunning the blushing shackles and the
Fonsecas Postils but here Mr Licentiat shewed his art and hath so curtly succinctly and concisely Anacephalyz'd Analyz'd and Epitomiz'd the long story of the Captive that if his afternoone Repetitions were with halfe that paines and method summ'd up ad populum they would keep waking the best part of his Auditory after a full meale 'T is a good character of a Judge to be attentive to heare ambabus auribus on both sides and both sides as they say without interposing or troubling witnesses or suffering the Councill to doe it and so in his instructions to the Jury to lay open the Law not his affections to them which is the cause many times that those honest men and true swai'd by hints and girds to the parâ— that his Lordship is offended at often brings very false and partiall verdicts for which they ought to incurre the penalty of fasting after their delivery up of their opinions rather then before The Curate took him fast by the other hand and marched over with both them unto the Iustice. Had this been in England now it had been a wedding but the Spanish Curates will not easily part with so beneficiall a Sacrament as Matrimony to Lay-Hucksters Marriage and flesh being Quadragesimall prohibitions and forbidden in the time of Lent cum dispensatione licentiâ were very gratefull accessaries to a slender Vicaridge Double fees besides eggs and Alicant with many a Joviall entertainment are more considerable then petty Tithes and made the Curate more blith and bonny then an Arch-Deacons visitation where beside the danger of information he paid for his owne dinner and his visitors If all hits right and that this learned contrivance of Mr Curates could worke in Zoraidas Inchristianation with the solemnity and rights belonging to it and the gaudia magna of her after-marriage with the Captive to be the reward of this service as it deserv'd it how soone might he expect a change of his small Vicaridge for uberius beneficium and admire himselfe in his long Cassock broad Hat and divinity Belt the advanc'd creature of the times nothing being a surer step to preferment then the joyning great persons together in Matrimony or the Nulling Don Quixot offer'd himselfe to watch and guard the Castle while they slept How proper physick he finds out for a mad man watching being the only meanes to tame frenzy had it been confin'd to a close room but this new humor of being grand round to the Castle makes him more wild then before and subjects him totally to ' the cold influences of the Moon which was the Predominant Planet in his Pericranium Could he not remember what befell him when upon the entrance of his adventures this vertigo of noctivagation and watching his Armes seizd him How dismall was that nights Guardian-ship wherein was more want of discretion then sleep when the Carriers had almost laid him stone dead and yet the bold and hardy Knight alone not as in other adventures attended by Sancho Pancha witnesse and partner of his sufferings he will react this solitary incounter Having nothing but the spangled Coverlid of Heaven over him and poor Rosinant under whose paines and Tantalizations in this nights round were more irksome to the beast then all his other out-ridings which were ever though somewhat long first gratified with the welcome rest of an Inne but now he is dizzed with the continuall circuits of the Stables which are ever approached and never enter'd beside the unsupportable torment of feeding horses the noise of grinding the beloved Corne the smell of hay and litter and nothing but the smell and noise of it which made Rosinant thinke if ever his imagination was discovered that he was in Limbo Equorum and condemnn'd with Tantalus Horses to the same flying Provender and deluding dainties which should never come nerer then his ears or eyes CHAP. XVI Darke night invades the Inne and pleasing sleep With woollen feet on every head doth creep Only our vigilant Don and young Don Lewis Yield not to Morpheus wand that braines bedewes Transform'd into a Lackey by loves powers Like a wing'd Cupid hid in various flowers His particolour'd sute he silent flutters About his Claras Coach i' th' night he utters His sad complaints in songs and piteous aires And tels how love no sexe no person spares Whilest other musick not so soft nor sweet Don Quixot raiseth playing on his feet Strung up too high but yet the cord won't break Which puts the screech-Owle to a dismall skreak Come see the Don of more then common hope Not Errant now but pendent in a rope TEXT I Am a Mariner to love Don Lewis first Sonnet 1. Runne nimble tongue by night And fill her with delight That her deceived eares May think th' obsequious spheares And sweet intelligences Striving to court her senses 2. Raise thy cleer notes so high That labouring birds may die And vanquish'd Philomel Warble her owne last knell Whilest their vaine Thrillos hope VVith my love-tunes to cope 3. If that my Clara sleep A pretty murmuring keep In low and solemn straines So lullaby her braines That shee may trembling dreame Her head 's in some soft streame 4. But when shee wakes and findes The error of her mind Let such an eccho strike Her eare that it may like The rows'd Tarantula Take life from the high key 5. Having got audience Monopolize her sence And let thy ditties be In praise of her and me Untill poor soule shee long To yield up for a song He is no Horse-boy quoth Clara but a Lord of many Townes Here were a note now to enlarge upon the power of love but we have had many examples already and unum pro cunct is fâ—ma loquatur opus In any transformation feigned or true more could not be seen then in this gentlemans metamorphosis who for pure love was a Spaniell by day and a Nightingall by night That his feet run was no small pain to him but the running of his tongue was no small pleasure to those that heard it as will appeare in his second Sonnet Don Lewis second Sonnet 1. Though that thy Coach out-runne The stages of the Sunne And through more dreadfull â—ignes Thy Charioter inclines I follow will alone Through cold and torrid Zone 2. It is no shame for me Thy lackey for to be The Sunne himselfe did run A mistresse to have won To runne and speed is praise He lost yet got the Bayes 3. But if like Daphne thou Of changes dost allow Let me transformed be Into thy Axle-tree Thy Charret I will runne So thou be in 't my Sunne 4. He doth but lackey it too Who in a Coach doth woâ—â— And must bare-headed ride By his proud Ladies side His paines is not so great Only he waits in state 5. Those who upon command Of Ladies leave the land And doe strange services Their scorncfull dames to please Doe runne lesse pleas'd then I They from the mark I byâ— 6. Some thinke the
where being matters of the sheets they are most properly treated of Then Euphema quite out of hopes to convert him or make him any way sensible of his errour resolved to try one weapon more and if he persisted after that to end her life upon the Ponyard Thou hast a Mistris sure one of thy Love Not Lust were that reputed spotlesse Dove I deeme her so may she so for ever Such as thou wouldst make me though thou canst never A whore a perjured wife a bosome-thiefe A nest of Snakes for such is the reliefe Of bastard issue which thou boasts to lend 's Like the foule gelly from falne stars descends Couldst thou with patience cherish her Reward the goatish ranck Adulterer And kisse those Babies as thine own and blesse The spurious spawne of an Adulteresse Madam said Sanguine I should kick her her Barnes her Stallion into the aire unto the Prince of it their Ghostly Father but innocent Lady though it be true every one should do as he would be done by and harme watch harme catch are good rules yet at this time they are misapplied and quite beside the purpose And to be true to you Lady I have no Mistris of that nature then straight Euphema rejoyn'd Suppose that I were she as who can guesse How soone my husbands low-râ—n glasse may cease Couldst thou accept me for a wife who have Wrong'd my repute before he 's laid t'th ' grave Sure a pure Chrystall would more pleasant be Than a Speekt glasse tainted by venemous eye O change thy mind thy hopes may not be far Preferre no Falling to a Fixed star At these words Sanguine brought lower than his knees fell prostrate and beseeched her Ladiship that she would pardon his bold solicitation And calling Heaven and Earth Angels and Men to witnesse All that he feared hereafter or desired if Madam said he you and the Fates decree me to that happinesse and at once provide to blesse me both in soule and body it is not seven yeares expectation can weary out my patience nay those yeares though I wish not the prolongation of my felicity repeated would make me value my purchase the more by the gratefull stay before fruition And I shall wish to perish to eternity rather than adde a thought more to this loathsome sute I hate my selfe now for it I cannot say more than I love you but I hate my selfe perfectly villaine monster of my Sexe that came to spoile the miracle of hers unlesse your clemency raise me from this place Madam I will grow to it and not looke to heaven that is not you in the face untill I find your serenity in assured forgetfulnesse of what is past Euphema confident that these expressions were not feigned said Sir Your repentance doth oblige me to remission of past follies and your protestations of fidelity are so high that I will not question the faith of the speaker or have the least scruple of doubt about it Absolved and credited my trusty and well accounted servant let us in a noble and just conspiracy joine to elude my husbands fury and suspition both together which cannot be but by a seeming losse of that ehastity preservable in being supposed lost I have heard much of Platonick love now I will make experience of it and in that height that Impotentio shall be satisfied in my obedience as he calls it if the dutifull submission to so base an Act can please any long And as for you friend when the just time for such a motion shall permit I am to be challenged upon the promise which I shall not recede from you using the modesty and reverence of a Sutor Sanguine upon these words religiously kissed her and confirmed his perseverance in all chaste and civill deportments to her for ever There hung by the bed-side a rich and glorious Cymitar and they entring together the same sheets it was laid betwixt them emblematically designing the danger of violated oaths or else as a Ceremony preceding after the manner of espoused Queens and ratifying the Contract Sanguine no doubt wished the crooked weapon edgewaies upon Impotentios last thread of life that it might prove his Atropos and make a short cut to their desires But checking his recoyling thoughts he asked the Ladies leave to charme her eyes asleep with this ensuing Song 1. Sublimed Love Calcin'd desires Thoughts rarified to harmelesse fires And muzled Flesh with bloud refin'd Attend my new Platonick mind 2. Eyes that have ta'ne the Covenant And lift up hands with pulses faint Stopp'd eares tied tongue dead taste and touch Will help the new Platonick much 3. Thus tam'd thus rein'd thus mortified Approach the chastest Ladies side Rebated senses only prove Me fit for the Platonick Love 4. But let our soules emigrate meet And in Abstract embraces greet Till that the Fates permit let 's live Intranc'd by Love Intuitive Impotentio greedy to know the newes of his own dishonour posted so soone to his wives Chamber that Sanguine had scarce time to returne the Cymitar to its place and himselfe to his drawers but finding his Merchant in that posture he saluted him as newly arrived from Cape Bonae Speranzae And so it is Sir said Sanguine to you Impotentio a night of hopes but to me a Labour in vaine You need not now feare your brothers intrusion on your Estate here is noble Clarissimo pointing to the most delicate Euphema Intus existens alienum prohibens Then ran the imaginary Wittall to Euphema and joyed her by the name of Mother kissed her and bid her love his friend who had done more far for her than her husband could It was my griefe said she to find it so though he hath proved himselfe a man of honour reputation and ability and hath laid the seeds of a long trust in me It should be so said Impotentio but let us thinke what Gossips we shall have The Duke will not deny me I am sure and the great Monsieur Le Spraffe Leiger from France Sanguine replied nay Sir thinke me not so able though 't is pretty well with me to get Children o'r night to be borne men the next morning we are sure of our Workmanship according to the naturall way in due time but for miracles you must not look While they were in these discourses in came an old maid-servant very ghastly with watching all night wringing her hands and crying Oh my Lord Oh my good Madam what shall betide me the Moore is dead and in the piousest manner as we could guesse as any Christian could dye her hands often lift up to heaven sighing and making signes as if she cared not for her own death if her Ladies were secure and for want of timely salves expired in my Armos Woe is me that she died in my Armes I shall never thinke well of my selfe for it I have lived these fifty yeares with my old Lord and truly no body ever died in my armes before but your
Lordships gibb'd Cat rest his soule that died of a bone crosse his throat and I kept my bed a month upon it and what will follow after this who can tell The foolish story of the old nurse-woman troubled Impotentio who loved Fuseilla though his Slave for the love of his wife to her and it in wardly grieved him that by his rashnesse she was destroyed It was not long after that he sickned himselfe reflecting deeply upon the murder of the Moore which was openly bewailed but the deepe touch of Conscience for the abuse of his most constant wife was the maine stab it was never well with the poore creature after that libbing fellow was in the house Hoc tibi Penelope What be as bad and worse than her luxurious Sutors and now that his foolish brutish humour was fulfilled the inhumanity and barbarisme of the Fact stung him worse than Cleopatra's Vipers hearing the fall of her Amours to Marke Antonie Little Ascanius too must play in his Hall the long brand of his dishonour and he reputed his though no man could believe it wherefore disturbed in mind and every day decaying in strength he intended to make a quiet end though he lived since the time of marriage very pettishly Considering also that the abuse of his wife was his own invention nothing was more worthy in his imagination then to hate her for obeying his will and submitting upon force and execrtable threats and below his anger it seemed to maligne the fruit which he himselfe inoculated wherefore he sent for his brother and reconciled the differences betwixt their Families and satisfied his expectations confirming his eldest son in a faire estate then sending for Euphema said we are now private and you see how fast I decline there is no dallying nor hypocrisie to be used a small moment being betwixt me and my account wherefore as I desire it whither I am going so I heartily beg your pardon for my rash and ridiculous rape upon your Chastity Conceale my folly faithfullest of wives though what I have done cannot long be kept close Let his name be if a Male Potentio and do thou endowe him as his manners shall hereafter deserve The Child is innocent pointing to her rising mount and fruits of this nature though they grow wildings prove rarely off the tree and become Queene Apples the delight of their Princesses and fervants of great trust a more generous flavour and vigorous contagion giving influence at those stolne and illegitimate births than when legall duties are performed 'T is not therefore that you should be ashamed of him nor discourage his active spirits which that I may improve unto him the executrixship of all is thine and thou canst not hate what with such paines and dolours thou must dearely buy the Quarrels betwixt my Brother and my selfe composed thou wilt have no trouble but this stripling and then he sigh'd and wept bitterly being almost at his last gaspe which Euphema perceiving by his short breathings instantly fell down on her knees 'T is pity worthy soule to let thee go out of this world deceived in that thing too which you do most repent of and in whom you think the grand blemish of your house will for ever survive Depart Sir as to that matter satisfied in this discovery Here is Ascanius and Astyanax the hopefull issue of my impurity and drawing from underneath a fine wrought silken rowle absolv'd him of the jealousie This is your Angliterra-man which according to the times of growth hath been lesse or bigger pardon my imposturage not long durable for I was resolv'd to free you of suspition Sanguine is as innocent as this rowle for any act with me nay more innocent for Heavens forbid he should ever have come so neer me Impotentio made a spring up in his bed and kiss'd her and forthwith dyed having confirm'd her in a vast estate and left her Convert to be her comforter those dayes of publike sorrow over they married without the intervening of a Cymitar CHAP. IX Mine Host is wild Here comes a Caravaâ— Sing Gaudeamus gaudia Magna man What fangle now thy thronged guests to winne To get more Roome faith goe to Inne and Inne Leave off Romances and thy lies in Print Thy house hath nought but Current Stories in 't Things now in action and the George must be The Scene and perfect the Catastrophe Ferdinando thinking to make sure Luscind Is outed there where he had thought to have Inn'd And sad Cardenio who fear'd all was nought Is from his Spouse Heroicke stoutnesse taught Fair Dorothaea hight Nicomicon Leaves all her Kingdome to her Champion Drowsie Don Quixot and prefers the embrace Of Ferd'nand 'fore the title of her Grace Thus Chast Luscinda scaped her pursuer And Dorothaea met with her undoer Relations passe of severall misfortunes And all offence is pardon'd 'twixt the Curteines Tope it about mine Host the wine bags now Had been as good as milke of the red Cow But O what Cordiall for poor Sancho's got Sad beyond all refreshments of the pot Ungovern'd Uncardinall'd Unlorded Outed of all his hopes but not Unworded He sees and weeps and with unfeigned teares Curses Knight-Errants and the Fools their Squires Resolving to returne unto the Mancha As he went forth an Asse and Sancho Pancha TEXT THE Inne-keeper said here comes a faire Troupe of Guests and if they will here alight we may sing Gaudeamus Such indeed are true Saints dayes to the Hosts and here two or more are met together Sancta Dorothaeâ— an authentick Saint Luscinda a Virgin Martyr Cardenio a devout Pilgrim And Don Ferdinand after his pennance join'd with Sancta Clara of Viedma who will crowd in anon for a lodging may very well make holiday and a halfe 'T was very proper for these Saints to alight at the sign of Saint George who â—lew the Dragon which was to prey upon the Virgin The truth of which story hath been abus'd by his own Country-men who almost deny all the particulars of it as I have read in a scurrilous Epigram very much impairing the credit and Legend of St George As followeth They say there is no Dragon Nor no Saint George 't is said Saint George and Dragon lost Pray Heaven there be a Maid But it was smartly return'd to in this manner Saint George indeed is dead And the fell Dragon slaine The Maid liv'd so and dyed Shee 'll ne'r doe so againe Here Virginity is highly justified not so much in Luscinda chast in the Nunnery but chas'd out of it by the lustfull Ferdinand Indeed Dorothaea is a pregnant proofe of constancy and disproves that vulgar error that a blowne Rose is not so sweet as a clos'd when 't is well knowne that a little aire or vent disperses their Odours How much of her worth had been hidden if her gentlewoman had not been educated and instructed at what times to stay at what times to retire from her Ladies Chamber which is as necessary a