deformed and contemptible that mine own knowledge cometh far short of mine own misery O how justly mightst thou for ever leave me to my self to eat the fruit of mine own wayes and to be filled with the falshood of mine own devices to possess sorrow and inherit shame But thou O Lord who art infinite in goodness hast manifested to my sinfull soul that when I wretchedly forsake thee thou readily forsakest all to follow me when I run from thee thou bewailest me when misery compels me to return thou joyfully receivest me thou lovingly relievest me thou then graciously acceptest of me And now O Lord when I have even wearied out thy mercy and compassion towards me thou still invitest me to come unto thee To thee therefore O thou blessed Shepheard of my soul do I devote these penitent expressions O let those tributary tears which are due to thy sufferings be now plentifully poured forth for mine own sins Lord pardon my contempt of grace and graciously enable me to entertain these happy visits of thy holy Spirit and patiently to bear these sweet chastisements of thy heavenly hand that I may have fellowship with Christ and peace with God If thou Lord for the sins of my prosperity shalt think it fit to bring upon me the miseries of adversity for the great neglect of thy gracious visits to deny mee the sweet comforts of thy blessed answers yet give me patience and sure confidence to trust stil in thy mercie that so while I am most justly debarred of my longing desires I may not be utterly deprived of thy loving favours Lord cast me not away from thy presence O leave me not unto my self lest I perish everlastingly make me to see the richness of thy love and favour towards me Quicken the motions of thy blessed Spirit in me renew my good thoughts and six them wholly upon heaven and heavenly things Lord Jesus make me joyful in them and for ever truly thankful for them Make me willing to enjoy thee and ready to abandon all things for thee Lord I now seek thee but I cannot find thee I call upon thee but thou answerest me not O kiss me with the kisses of thy mouth for thy love is better than wine Lord let thy left hand support me and thy right hand imbrace me let me be outwardly and inwardly sustained by thee my weaknss by thy power my rebellion by thine obedience my folly by thy wisdom my pollution by thy sanctification my faith by thy fruition that I may be grieved for thine absence delighted in thy presence inamored with thy beanty inriched with thy bounty inflamed with thy love adorned with thy graces comforted with thy consolation incompast with thy glory Amen CHAP. 15. Upon the consideration of Gods peculiar Providence to his Children Lord NOthing can befall me in this life without thy wife and over-ruling providence not so much as one hair of me can fail without thy allowance for even my very hairs are numbred as a Sparrow cannot fall to the ground so neither a hair from mine head without thy sacred leave And if thy blessed Providence protecteth these inferior creatures if it extend it self even unto excrements how much more safely doest thou guard the bodies how much more tenderly the soules of thine Elect Yet such is my stupidity by nature that I seldom look beyond the seond causes I usually content my self with casuals and contingencies and often judge that meerly accidentall which sweetly moves by thy commands to thine appointment and thy childrens good Thy Providence is eternall thy provision in time thou O Lord art infinitely wise and caust therefore provide infinitely well the end thou ordainest to thy self the means to thy creature good and bad are under thy protection the good for themselves the bad for others both for thy glory the one thou willest to be happy the other thou permittest to be miserable neither of them can avoyd their necessity of fate and yet thou neither inclinest the one nor inforcest the other because unto both in their originall thou gavest perfect freedome of will to chuse the good to leave the bad to inherit life or purchase death Blessed God we are all debtors in our first Parents thou mayst therefore most justly require that of us which was lent us in them They were able to pay but not willing we their wofull posterity as we are in nature are neither able nor willing But by thy grace Lord we are onely willing and not able and thou hast therefore sent thine onely Son who was both freely willing and fully able to appease thy Justice to reconcile thy Mercy to comfort us here to crown us hereafter And now Lord having given us thy Son how shalt thou not together with him allso give us all things and yet I often see thee giving of good things to the bad and bad to the good there is nothing more fiequent in this life than the afflictions of thy children nothing more common than the prosperity of the wicked they receive their good things in this life I shall enjoy mine in that to come when I shall be comforted and they tormented Thou O Lord art righteous in all they waies and holy in all thy works thou loadest them with thine outward blessings for their outward obedience thou deniest me these outward favours for mine inward advantage by the one they are left inexcusable by the other I am made more conformable my patience exercised my faith tried my love examined my humility proved all these are speciall tokens of thy mercy towards me for as grace increaseth here so shall glory hereafter Lord what can he fear that is assured of thy favour that knoweth assuredly that all these outward things shall work together for the best to his advantage If Joseph be thrown into the Pit it is to send him into Egypt if into Prison to preser him to Pharoah that so Corn may be sent into Canaan if Satan be sent to tempt Job with afflictions it is because Job shall overcome Satan by patience if holy David become a sad spectacle of humane frailty by sinning it is to make him a pattern of true piety in repenting if the bodies of the Saints be grievously martyr'd in this life it is to array them with glorious robes in that to come Lord let this teach me joyfully to entertain the saddest of events which either thy wisdome mans unrighteousness or Satans cruelty can bring upon me to be patient under them and thankfull for them to ransake my soul and search diligently there for what sin thou sendest this sorrow to bewail it abhor it forsake it and earnestly implore thy pardon for it When I am thus happily resolved I shall then have that undaunted boldnesse to say with holy Job Allthough thou killest me yet will I trust in thee with holy David Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death yet will I fear none evill for thou Lord art with me
temptation if the World frown upon them they can chearfully say and faithfully believe that A small thing which the righteous hath is better than great riches of the ungodly Psal 37.16 if it smile that They then account all things but loss and dung in compare of Christ Jesus if outward blessings be present they are humble under them and thankfull for them if absent They can patiently tarry for the Lord for they know he is their help Psal 33.14 and that No good thing will he withhold from them that love him Psal 34.10 if sickness seize upon them The Lord is about their bed and about their path and spieth out all their waies their waies of sin and their waies of sorrow yea He maketh their beds in their sickness by ease to their bodies comfort to their souls if famine threaten them they have God's promise to maintain them For the eye of the Lord is upon them that fear him and upon all those that put their trust in his mercy To deliver their souls from dearth and to feed them in the time of security Psal 33.17 18. if sudden danger approach them they have heavenly succour to defend them for The Angell of the Lord tarrieth about all them that fear him to deliver them yea even Death it self is an advantage to them and therefore no waies able to affright them for Pretious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his Saints and therefore Though the Lord kill them yet will they trust in him Iob 13.15 Lord if thy mercy be thus great unto me while I am yet in my sinfull flesh how unspeakable shall I find thy love when my body is become spirituall my joy eternall From these outward enjoyments may well be derived their inward contentments but by their inward refreshments is enjoyed that incomparable inconceivable unutterable sweetness that blessed peace of God and joy in the holy Ghost which passeth all our understanding God's holy Spirit witnessing with their spirits that they are his children and most pretious in his sight and they are now fully perswaded with his blessed Apostle that Neither Death nor Life nor Angels nor Principalities nor Powers nor things present nor things to come nor height nor depth nor any other Creature shall be ever able to separate them from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord Rom. 8. 37 38. How full of solid comfort is this blessed assurance how are our souls ravished with apprehension of the sweetness of our present comforts of the fulness of our future joyes these blessed earnests of that ever blessed Spirit are the faithfull pledges of his future embraces far above the reach of Malice to disturb or Devill to destroy Hence it is that our faith is pretious our hope lively our joy glorious our lives safe our deaths blessed and from hence arise those many and those rich endowments of the Saints their zeal burning their love wonderfull their desires earnest their longings insatiate their petitions for enjoyings importunate Lord what can I desire more of thee than what I enjoy from thee I have thy mercy without me and thy mercy within me thy mercy in life and thy mercy in death thy mercy from the beginning thy mercy to the end and thy mercy without end I am even crowned and encompassed with mercy O let me now say with holy David I will allwaies give thanks unto the Lord and his praise shall be ever in my mouth Psal 34.1 Let me not onely praise thee my self but with him allso invite others to praise thee O praise the Lord with me all ye his Saints and let us magnifie his name together Psal 34.3 O tast and see how gratious the Lord is blessed is that man which putteth his trust in him Be glad O yee righteous and rejoyce in the Lord and be joyfull all yee that are true of heart Psal 32.12 And now Lord having had a tast of the sweetness of thy Saints happiness on earth I willingly forsake all to follow them I have too long been straying in the strange pastures of impiety and am now joyfully desirous to be led home to thy fold that I may feed in the green and fresh pastures of thy sacred precepts and drink freely of those waters of comfort in thy blessed promises that I may so drinle that I may never thirst but be fully satisfied with thy grace in this life with thy glory in that to come O let this evill world neither allure me to its vanities nor betray me from thy mercies but as thou hast overcome the world for me so by thy grace assisting it may be allso overcome by me Thou hast indeed told me that I shall mourn in it but my mourning shall be turned into joy and that my joy shall no man take from me Lord I believe help my unbeliefe I embrace thy cross I despise the shame for that glory which is set before me of which I have a safe assurance by the blessed earnest of thy holy Spirit in me To thee O Father Son and holy Spirit one eternall infinite incomprehensible and ever blessed Goodness be all possible praise honour and glory now and for ever Amen O thou great God who hast tender bowels of compassions and multitudes of mercies for us miserable sinners who art not easy to be provoked but ever ready to forgive who sufferest not thy whole displeasure to arise against us but even in thy very judgements remembrest mercy and art then moved with the sight of our misery have mercy upon me a great and grievous finner Lord I have sinned I have transgressed I have done foolishly in departing from thy judgements But righteousness belongeth unto thee O Lord and unto me shame and confusion of face O let thy bowels of compassions remove out thy sight my multitudes of transgressions that I may now appear before thee with a joyfull heart and happy soul Let thy words be sweeter to me than the hony and the hony comb than the vain pleasures and false profits of this life O let my chiefest joy be in thy service my greatest delight to walk in thy waies and all false waies of pollution and uncleanness let me utterly abhorr Give me that inward peace that quietness of conscience which the world cannot take from me that when I am afflicted by it I may not be condemned with it Lord let me faithfully believe and gratiously improve the constancy of thy love in the worlds great unconstancy the richness of thy mercy in this wretched ages misery O that my eye might drop without ceasing that my heart might break forth into complaints and my soul be melted into sorrows for mine own and others sins that have occasioned these heavy judgements these sad complainings of thy people Lord as I have been a great and grievous sinner amongst them so let me be a constant and a true mourner for them as thou hast beheld us sinning so now allso behold us sorrowing
THE SINNER'S TEARS IN MEDITATIONS AND PRAYERS By THO FETTIPLACE Dom Pet Cantab. Mat. 3.2 Repent for the Kingdome of Heaven is at hand LONDON Printed for Humphrey Moseley and are to be sold at his Shop at the Prince's Armes in St. Paul's Church-yard 1653. The SINNERS TEARS By T.F. Iuâ—â—â— Suhitp tâ—â—vâ—scrâ—â—it Paenitentia 16 LONDON 53 Printed for Humphrey Narley at the Princes Armes in St Pauls Churchyard TO THE RIGHT HONORABLE RICHARD Lord Keble one of the Lords Commissioners of the Great Seal of England and the much Honored Mary his truly Virtuous and Religious Lady Grace and Peace My honored Lord I Know not where to find a fitter Patron for tears than your Lordship the constant Series of whose happie daies hath been an exact pattern of true Piety and but one intire Oblation of fincere Devotion Greatness and goodness are the best supporters of decaying Holiness by the one she is defended from suffering ill by the other incouraged in doing well These high and happy Ornaments together with my nearness of blood unto your Honors nearest relation and mine infant education in that gratious Family to which as to the happy instruments I thankfully ascribe my first ingraftings into Christ are strong perswasions to invite me to presume upon your Honors Patronage of this small tract and humbly to present you with a tast of such wholsome fruits as by divine increase have had their growth from those precedent blossoms If ever kneeling were in season now is the needfull time when there is not onely wrath gone out from the Lord against us but even the blood Vialls of his fiercest wrath are daily powred down upon us I willingly confess my self to have been too deep a sharer in those grievous sins which have inforced these heavy judgements what I cannot recall I desire heartily to bewail and as a true signe of mine unfeigned sorrow according to the measure of my weak abilities have penn'd these following lines accept of them I beseech you as humbly devoted to your honors service and read them as the disturbed notions of my distracted meditations That holy Providence which hath directed their ends will I trust supply their defects even this the least of graines by that mercy may become a fruitfull tree and branch it self into matter of commemoration to the learned of instruction to the ignorant of help to the weak of comfort to the willing of joy to the good of terror to the bad of happiness I trust to all that are directed to it and especially unto their soules that stand in greatest need of comfort from it I shall not presume to inlarge my self with wast expressions because I know your Lordships more weightie affairs will not admit of such fruitless indeavours I shall now onely crave your Honors leave to end with Orisons as you have been both holy in your lives so may you be happy in your deaths blessed in your memorialls may those hopefull pledges of your loves be faithfull earnests of your joyes and future branches of the Churches Peace may they all by your examples go on cheerfully and joyfully in those pathes of Piety which lead to rest and quietness that their seed-time being sorrow their harvest may be joy that all tears may be wip'd from their eyes all sorrowes from their hearts This is my honored Lord the most affectionate desire as a kinsman the most zealous as a Christian of The most humble of all your Honors Servants Tho Fettiplace To the Christian Reader All Christian Consolation Reader THe miseries of this distressed age are such and so many that I know well a subject of joy would in the worlds eye appear more seasonable and be far more acceptable after such a deluge of sorrow but that heart which is as truly sensible of the weight of Sin as of the burden of Misery will surely find that there is no true joy but in godly sorrow that there is more complaceney of soul in one repentant tear than in an age of pleasure with grief of heart I confess that much of my little time hath been vainly spent I now therefore willingly resolve to lament my lost houres and shall account it my chiefest happiness on earth to spend my short remainer to my best advantage I beseech thee therefore for thine own sake to consider with mee that God hath-reserved us unto the last the worst the very dreggs of time that our transgressions are innumerable our calamities unmatchable our griefs unutterable that our dayes our houres our minutes perhaps are few and full of evill that it were even now most just with God to bring them to an end that Satans cunning is unsearchable his malice implacable and without divine assistance unresistable that there is no one minute of our whole lives in which we are not exposed unto many great dangers both of souls and bodies and wee shall then find that it behoveth us to watch and pray that it mainly concerneth us to store our selves with such fit remedies as may either inable in the combat or support us in the foil Such humble Confessions and devout Prayers as by Gods mercy I have found agreeable to mine own condition I have here published for the good of thine and such true comfort as I have enjoyed in them I heartily desire may be derived to thee from them And my humble and most earnest petition unto Almightie God is that as wee have been deep sharers in sinning and in suffering so wee may also be devout sharers in sorrowing that the Vialls of our teares may pacisie the Vialls of his wrath that so his fierce anger may be appeased our crying sinns pardoned our bad consciences quieted our bleeding hearts comforted our languishing desires relieved our sad divisions ended our distressed Church restored our dear Country preserved and our sinfull souls and bodies eternally saved With this happy resolution of timely contrition I joyfully imbrace thee and earnestly intreat to be imbraced by thee that by this blessed Union of our souls upon Earth wee may at last enjoy each other in those sweet imbraces of Eternity which is the cordiall desire and shall be the daily and devout prayer of Thy servant in all good affections and hearty well-wishes in Christ Jesus Tho. Fettiplace The Sinners Complaint AH Lord so long what sudden fears What cares and doubts what sighs and teares Since last thou did'st afford thy loving look Have me oprest And rob'd of rest Because thou Lord thy servant hast forsook If not a look yet hear me speak And pittie me O do not break Thy bruised reed why should'st thou strive with man Whose dayes are done When but begun Sith thou great God hast measur'd out his span Amaze me not with fearfull things Give me thy grace O give me wings Of swift desire and holy zeal to raise My soul to skies With powerfull cryes That I may sweetly warble forth thy praise Thou art my Centre fix me there Or move me in thy
enough for me to consider the Divine nature in Unitie of Essence unless I go yet further and find a Trinity of Persons to be curious in this search is dangerous to be careless damnable nothing may be here safely seen but what is gratiously revealed Lord no man can see thee as thou art in thy self suffer mee therefore to see thee as thou art unto us that I may know thee and love thee and delight in thee and be for ever known and loved of thee If there were not an eternity of being then it may be truly said that not being was before being and so that being had its rise from-not being by causing it self to be when it was not So should Privation which was eternally evill produce that glorious being which is eternally good Seeing this cannot be it will hence follow that being was from all eternity and that this being was eternally Good for that which was good in the effect must needs be far more eminently good in the cause That this eternall good being must be also infinite because eternity it self is infinite That this infinite eternall good being must be of infinite power to continue infinitely That this infinite power must also bee of infinite understanding to support and preserve this eternall infintie good beeing and this infinite understanding is God Where there is an infinite understanding there must also be an infinite object to be understood els could it not be insinitely active and so should both eternity and infinitie suffer diminution and become defective which were for them both to be and not to be which is impossible and seeing there can be no object infinite out of God therefore this eternall infinite and ever-blessed object must of necessity be God Where there is an infinite understanding and an infinite object to be understood there cannot choose but be an infinite and eternall love for from this infinite Understanding of this infinitely amiable and for ever blessed object there must needs proceed an infinite delight whereby it infinitely injoyeth its own excellency and eternally reflecteth on the beauty of its own perfection els this infinite eternall understanding should want power to enjoy this infinitely aimiable object and so should be neither good infinite nor eternall and this infinite and eternall love is God Now because this Understanding Object and Love are all infinite and that whatsoever is infinite must of necessity be God it will from thence truly and undoubtedly follow that this understanding is God this Object God and this Love God And because it is as equally impossible that there can be any more than one infinite therefore it will as assuredly follow that these three are one three in Existence one in Essence three in Order one in Eternity three persons one eternall infinite glorious incomprehensible wise God to whom be glory for ever Amen This is that blessed Father Son and Holy Spirit that ineffable most mysterious Trinity in Unity eternally injoying blessedness in its own Essence This is that blessed inter-union of that ever blessed Spirit that most unspeakable immutable incomprehensible fruition of eternall joy at which the blessed Angells stand amazed in which the blessed Saints shall sweetly rest themselves for ever All this and infinitely more than this thou art Lord in thy self thy Wisdom Justice Mercy Truth Power Holiness and whatsoever other Attributes thou art pleas'd to take unto thy Divine Essence are unto thee one although unto us divers and thou art therefore pleased diversly to manifest thy self unto us because we cannot otherwise conceive thy being than according to thine outward working thy distinct operations are unto us the divers Indications of thine eternall undivided and for ever blessed essence And now Lord who can see thee thus and live I have hitherto seen nothing but destruction to my body amazement to my soul In thine Essence there is light inaccessible unto which no mortall eye can approach in thine attributes terror unutterable from which no mortall man can escape Thy wisdom trying my corrupt heart and scoarching my sinfull reines Thy Justice most severe fearfull in the pronunciation dreadfull in the execution Thy truth admitteth of no alteration no Judgement pronounced but precisely fullfilled Heaven and Earth shall pass away but not one tittle of thy sacred word Thy Holiness is such that even the blessed Angells are impute in thy sight what then shall become of me a miserable wretch the thoughts of whose heart are only evill and that continually were it not for thy rich mercy I were lost for ever by this alone I am for ever reconcilâ—d unto thee and shall eternally be blessed with thee I can here with joy unspeakable and glorious behold thee my loving Father affectionately imbracing me in Christ from all eternity by the sweet working of thy holy Spirit this is that truly-blessed vision of the sacred and mysterious Trinity in this life of Grace that will for ever make me truly happy in that of Glory Lord if I find thee not Three in One to my soul's comfort in this life I shall never be found of thee to be blessed in thee in that to come Without thy Power it had not been decreed without thy Wisdom it had never been acted without thy Love it had never been sinished Here in a severe Judge I joyfully behold a mercifull Redeemer In a glorious Divinity a true Humanity united to the Deity not mixed with it Before I had three Persons in one Essence here I have two Natures in one Person God and Man one Christ in whom and by whom I have a joyfull interest and undoubted union in the Godhead Here is the Father promising the Son performing the Holy Spirit confirming This is alone that blessed sight of God that bringeth rest and quietness to my weary soul To know him to be my God to have suffered for my sin and risen again for my Justification To find him supporting sustaining me in my infirmaties relieving my wants chastising my errors revenging my wrongs repairing my breaches directing my wayes protecting my person wounding rending breaking my obdurate heart creating in me a clean heart and renewing a right Spirit within me bemoaning bewailing mine iniquities inviting nay compelling me to mercy and forgiveness Seeing now O my Soul that Gods being in himself is incomprehensible and his Love in Christ unutterable with what Filial fear shouldst thou think of him with what awfulness name him with what reverence and preparedness pray unto him with what heat of affection love him with what carefulness and conscience fear to offend him with what cheerfulness and holy diligence devote thy service to him Blessed Lord Seeing that I am utterly unable of my self to comprehend thee O let me be graciously comprehended of thee that corruption may be swallowed up of immortality and humane frailty of eternall glory As thou hast given me an understanding in part to know thee so give me also affections intirely to love thee and fixed
not only safety inviolable but peace untterable safety in life and sweetness in death And now Lord when I enquire for what cause thou givest me all this I find nothing but thy meer love unto me when I ask what thou requirest for all this I hear thee demand no thing but the return of love what is more easy what more sweet than love and what object more aimable than that glorious being that is the perfection of al love that love the beauty of al perfection Thou canst not give Lord what thou hast not the glory of thy creation is but a glimps of that grater glory of thine essence Lord who can deny thee Love how sweet is this yoak how light this burden when I love thee I enjoy thee and my self in thee I possess thee I rest in thee for ever O my God all that thou givest mee all that thou requirest of mee is to make mee happy to thee be glory for ever Amen Blessed Lord All this I joyfully confess thou hast done for mee and yet the whole course of my corrupt life hath been nothing elce but a continued Rebellion against thee mine Eyes full of Adultery my tongue of Corrupt communication my hands of oppression mine eares open to iniquity my heart full of hypocricy my feet Lame in thy paths and swift to walk in the wayes of sinners my whole man nothing elce but the very body of death and destruction I have sinned against precepts against promises against mercies against judgments against the checks of mine own conscience and the blessed motions of thy holy Spirit I have even tempted my temptations by making daily and hourely provisions for sin and have been so farr from sorrowing for all this that I have resolved to continue yet still And yet so great is thy compassion towards mee that still thou storest up new mercies for mee Lord I bewail my weakness I lament my willfulness I abhorr my filthiness I heartily desire and earnestly endeavour to unrip my soul to ransack my heart to unlock the very secrets of my thoughts that I may have all my sins continually before mee even in their worst appearances and I may loath them and leave them and obtain thy gratious pardon for them I confesse Lord that I am utterly unworthy to enjoy this blessed light which I have so much abused to thy great dishonour much more the light of Grace by which thou leadest me to that of Glory and that it were more just with thee for ever to deprive me of these happy lights and to expose me to the terrours of eternall darknesse Lord I have finned and cannot chuse but sin I am a great and grievous sinner and yet I am thy child have pity upon me have pity upon me for I am in misery into the bosome of thy tender love I thrust my sinfull soul for safety and protection O let not thy justice triumph in my ruine but thy mercy in my deliverance so shalt thou have the glory and I the sweetnesse of mine eternall happinesse Hear me O Lord and help me for thy name sake for thy promise sake for thy Sons sake Amen CHAP. 3. Vpon the consideration of Divine Providence A Meditation for Noon Blessed God WIthout thy holy providence no creature can subsist by thine Allmighty power they were created out of nothing and if thou shouldst not sustain them they must needs return to nothing how wisely how wonderfully doest thou guide and govern these inferiour creatures All things are at once disposed of by thee and move successively to their appointed ends but above all how gratiously hast thou provided for the good of man what varieties of food how secretly how sweetly disposed it to sustentation No creature can be nourishing without thee and with thee I enjoy not onely nutriment but delectation how sweet is this thy goodnesse to my body how much more sweet thy mercy to my soul and if thy temporall refreshments are so good how ravishing is that celestiall food with which thy Saints and Angels are delighted Lord how undeserving am I of these thy many favours Thou givest rain to the earth and it becometh fruitfull thou loadest me daily with thy blessings and loe I am unthankâ—â—â— even those creatures that are insensible are daily nourisht into augmentation and man alone whom thou hast made to live for ever contents himself with daily diminution This wofully appears by my deadness and dulness in my Christian calling by my back wardness to Holy Duties by my carelesnesse and coldnesse in prayer wearinesse in reading irkomenesse in meditation by my faint Hope sick Faith luke-warm Love frozen Charity lame Patience languishing Zeal and all those other visible decayes of Goodness which are none other than the very symptomes of a dying soul Ah now Lord how miserably deformed must I needs appear in thy fight that am thus ugly in mine own Thou that hadst compassion on me when I was in my blood and then saidst unto me Live that hast washed me clean from sin and pollution and espoused me into thine own bolom wilt thou allso love me in death Wilt thou court me in the grave How justly mightest thou for ever leave me to mine own ruin that can so easily so willingly forsake thee for the pleasures of sin and yet how sweetly how affectionately doest thou order all things for me Even my very sins invite me to a more happy to a nearer Union with thee To thee therefore O my God the life of my life the very being and assured comfort of my sinfull soul and wretched body do I address my self for mercy and forgiveness I confess my self unworthy of thy gracious providence in sustaining this frail and infirm body much more unworthy O Lord of thine unspeakable love in reviving relieving imbracing my deformed soul Blessed Lord who am I of whom thou art thus tenderly compassionate When I was in the womb I was defiled with sin when I came out of it I was covered with shame the World bewitched me the Flesh besotted me the Devill beguiled me Lord when no eye pittied me then thou badst mercy on me and now at last when I am run from thee when I have adulterated my first Love when I am become poor and wretched and miserable and blind and naked thou freely forgivest me thou callest me thy fair one and givest me thy love O my God I admire thy Goodness I deplore and abhor mine own wretchedness O let the sweetness of thy love in Christ inflame the dying sparks of my benummed soul to praise thee without ceasing Expatiatc my narrow thoughts with day'y contemplation of my heavenly home with joyfull expectation of the sweet fruition of Eternity O give me such a blessed raptasie of soul that I may live above the reach of humane misery and reign with thee hereafter in immortall glory CHAP. 4. Upon the consideration of the sinfulness shortness and uncertaintie of life A Meditation suited to the Evening
Lord WHen I call to mind how many daies have past me without bending of a knee how many nights I have gone prayerless to bed I may well wonder that I am this hour alive to speak unto thee I have been too unmindfull of thy holy providence and am therefore utterly unworthy of thy mercifull protection Few and full of evill have my dayes been in the house of my pilgrimage I know not how soon I may goe hence and yet I still live as if I knew not why I came hither I am many wayes invited to my heavenly home how sweetly doest thou wean from the miseries of life by the blessedness of death By this Evenings rest of my body I am put in mind of that eternall rest of my soul This dayes ending tells me that the end of all things is at hand that the fashion of this world passeth and that all things shall become new As this hour is the Evening to this day so this day for ought I know may be the Evening to my whole life I cannot challenge to my self one minute more how vain am I to promise dayes and years Lord in the whole current of thy Sacred Story I find but onely one that durst presume upon so large a reckoning and him thou brandest with the name of Fool Let his folly Lord be my instruction so shall I account each day my last and neither care to live nor fear to dye How many have been snacht out of this life how suddenly and to mans eye how fearfully How unspeakable is thy mercy unto me to spare me for repentonce how often and how earnestly hast thou invited me to mercy how coldly and how carelesly have I refused these thy gracious offers still I sin and still thou forgivest and which is the height of my impiety I therefore am more and more evill against thee because thou art more and more gracious unto me and it were now most just with thee even this very moment to put a period to my sinfull life Lord Let this teach me to improve the short remnant of my dayes to thy service and that I may endeavour so to doe I will prescribe my self these following rules Each evening shall take a strict account of that dayes traffique for my soul and where I find my self a loser I will labour for supply When I awake my first thoughts shall begin with thee from whom I have my first being Nothing will more truly represent me to my self than the first view of mine affections if my first thoughts be seasoned with grace my following actions will savour of goodness My care shall be more to dress my soul than to trim my body I will think no pains too great no ornaments too rich to make her beautifull One devout sigh from a contrite heart is of more worth in thy sight than an hours task of Lip-devotion My affections are the soul of my words without which I speak onely but pray not when my prayers are cold my hopes may well be comfortless My set hours for Devotion shall be constant no pretence of nature shall debar me of this happiness The Lovers eyes are often glancing on the pleasing object that delights him if my affections be sincere my looks will be amorous I shall often steal a sweet Ejaculation to satisfie the longing of my Love-sick soul When I can thus bring the day to an end my life will be comfortable my death happy and I may then say with holy David that I will lay me down in peace and take my rest for it is thou Lord onely that makest me dwel in safety Blessed Lord in the morning of my Creation thou gavest me unto my self in the evening of my Redemption thou gavest thy self unto me My Creation was wonderfull my Redemption astonishing As this dayes light is obscured for the rest of my body so wert thou the blefied and eternall Light for the rest of my soul Thou O blessed Saviour art my light to direct me my heat to comfort me my sweet and safe repose eternally to refresh me Gracious God With humble and dejected heart I ask forgiveness of the many failings of my sinfud life past recall my sinfull thoughts to my remembrance Lord as the burthen of them is intollerable so let my grief for them be unutterable Lord open mine eyes that I may see the foulnes and the filthiness of sin and apprebend the greatness of thy wrath against it Forgive those actuall sins which this dayes light hath witnessed Lord give me a godly sorrow for them a perfect batred against them a fixed and a constant resolution to forsake them Lord cleanse me from my secret and unknown sins and keep me for thy mercy sake that daring and presumptuous sins may never have dominion over me Make me a carefull Steward of that pretious time which thou haft given me withdraw my affections from the vain pleasures of this sinfull life and grant that all the dayes of my appointed time I may wait readily and chearfully untill my change shall come CHAP. 5. Upon our approaching unto Gods House Lord THere is no mortall man worthy to stand at thy door much less to appear in thy presence and yet how often have I presumed to approach unto thee without that preparedness of heart without that dejection of soul without that true and holy reverence that becometh thy child I am now going out of Egypt into Canaan out of Bondage into Freedom The sinfull troubles of this life are my souls Taskmasters to load it with a burthen insupportable and this is that place of sacrifise that Mount of God to ease and solace it Consider therefore O my soul in what relation thou now standest to thy God If thou art a true Israelite thou wilt look back upon thy drudgery and despise it and offer up thy self a living sacrifice with cheerfulness with thankfulness of heart If thou art Gods child thou wilt love to be in Gods house Long for Gods presence thirst for his favour delight in his Word and rejoyce to be often at his Table Thou wilt make it thy chiesest joy to be often in that place from whence thou mayst expect thy chiefest good Lord by thy grace assisting I will now uncloath my self of all earthly affections I will call to mind unto whose presence I approach and wherefore that I am going from this Church Militant to that Triumphant that thou Lord art as truly present here in Grace as there in Glory unless therefore I am in love with misery I will leave behind me all earthly-mindedness and carry with me a pure heart and heavenly thoughts a lowly mind and reverend gesture Lord if I go not cheerfully to thy Throne of Grace I may well fear I shall never go joyfully to that of Glory The lowest room in thy House shall content me Divine Worship admitteth not of disparity of persons we are all sinners and as we are in nature most impure in thy sight the
worst room in thy House is too good even for the best of us yet decency of place may be taken with modesty if not sought with emulation During the time of this holy dispensation I will call my thoughts unto a strict attendance and make it part of my precedent prayer that I may Satan is ever most busie when our intentions are most holy which when he cannot divert he labours to corrupt and by this means when I desire to grow better I become worse How carefull ought I to be to avoyd his cunning who can couzen me in my best actions My soul shall more delight it self with the matter than my ears with the melody of thy sacred Notes Church-musick will be then truly sweet unto me when mine outward joy is subservient to mine inward Mans sinfull weakness shall not make me slight thy holy Ordinance If my Pastor have failings I will pity and pray for him but not despise him If I look into mine own soul I shall there find work enough to repair mine own ruins This Lord shall rather move me to extoll thy mercy in upholding mine own steps to lament the sadness of my Brothers misery Lord let me never think my self better than another because I know not how soon I may become worse I shall willingly continue in that Fold where thou hast placed me and hope to remain there with comfort till thou shalt lead me out with safety While I am at thy feeding I am happy one of thy morsels well digested with humility and thankfulness will yeeld me better nourishment than that other food of mine own finding The very meanest of thy Ministers may afford me Patience and that heavenly Grace with thy blessing to boot is a great advantage If I receive thy Sacred Word with cheerfulness with earnestness of heart my obedience shall be accepted my zeal rewarded While I am within thy walls I shall account that gesture most decent that is most humble and those ceremonies most necessary that are most suitable to obedience all matters of Doctrine which are necessary to salvation ought to be guided by thy sacred Word which is the onely rule of faith all matters of Discipline which are necessary onely to obedience are therefore left to thy Churches care that as thou art one so thy Church may be one in that blessed union of love which is the bond of peace And now O Lord if thou shalt call me to a strict account for all my misdemeanours in thy sacred Worship with what confusion of face must â—needs appear before thee How many evill suggestions how many idle imaginations how many sinfull objects have I often entertained to divert my thoughts from thy service I have too often sinned in absenting thy House but more often and more grievously in frequenting it by coming carelesly and out of custome by unbeseeming gestures cold prayers heartlesse hearing profane scoffing curious censuring and even in the best of my performances by serving thee my God by halves all this I heartily bewail and earnestly desire thy pardon and forgivenesse for it Lord let this daies rest of my body bring to my remembrance that eternall rest of my soul let me not now think mine own thoughts speak mine own words doe mine own actions but come before thee with a sanctified and humble soul with a wounded and contrite spirit Repell all evill suggestions remove all idle imaginations divert all sinfull objects enlighten mine understanding rectify my will strengthen my memory subdue mine affections that I may rejoyce in thy love delight in thy law long for thy presence rely on thy promises thirst for thy grace and be for ever blessed in thy glory Amen CHAP. 6. Upon our returning from Gods House and the neglect of private duties Lord HE that knoweth thee will undoubtedly delight to serve thee if I call thy Sabbath a delight my thoughts in this day will be pure my words gratious mine actions holy That soul which cannot joyfully familiarize it self with thee in this life may well be fearfull to be seen of thee in that to come When I seriously consider what a rich favour I enjoy how great a distance I am at from thee my God how sweet a mercy thou affordest me to speak unto thee I cannot but confesse mine own unworthinesse if I regard not what I hear if I rejoyce not to recall thy blessed words to my remembrance How dreadfull was that voyce that spake in thunder and how severe the words that then were spoken how blessed is this still musick of the Gospell and how delightfull to my wounded spirit Lord let this raise my soul above the reach of earthly vanities let this encourage me to heavenly chearfullnesse in heavenly duties to be joyfull in reading fervent in prayer frequent in meditation constant in all That knowledg wil make wofully wise which teacheth me to know and not to do thy will Meditation is the life of Hearing Practice the life of Meditation and a sincere heart the life of Practice When I look into my life past I find it to be all sin when I consider of my life present I cannot but confesse it to be all shame I am still so far from growing better that I am become much worse this is that blessed day which concerneth my peace if I embrace not this happy opportunity I may justly fear these gratious offers will be hid for ever from mine eyes each word that I heard thy day is of weight if I become not more holy by my heavenly improvements by it I shall certainly become sinfull by my carelesse neglecting of it Thy work O Lord will have its end and this end either to my happinesse or ruine shall assuredly promote thy glory there is no vacuity in nature with thee the God of nature there can be none Think therefore O my soul that this daies instruction may be thy last as thou hopest for heaven let it not passe thee without some profit Consider seriously how many millions of worlds one lost soul would give to be restored to thy condition that to morrow thou mayest be as one of them and then judge how great will be thy folly how wofull thy misery if thou triflest with those sacred counsels which concern thy rest O thou God of infinite compassions look not upon those infinite failings of my sinfull nature but behold me in the beauty and perfection of thy blessed Son Teach me O Lord to see the rebellion of mine own wicked heart by his perfect obedience my sinfulnesse by his righteousnesse my misery by his mercy Forgive my many and sinfull compliances of nature which have made me a stranger to thy graces and mine own happinesse The great neglect of mine obedience unto thy commands hath justly called for the great and heavy load of mine afflictions the carelesse withdrawing of mine affections from thee my God hath occasioned the sad departings of thy holy Spirit from me O that my losse of tears
his gracious performances I now enjoy that blessed Peace of God which passeth all our understanding My deliverance is wonderful my freedom absolute my peace unalterable my joy unutterable My conscience is now quieted my spirit ravished mine enemies vanquished and my God wel-pleased To thee therefore O thou blessed Fountain of eternall sweetness do I address my joyfull soul to love and honour thee to my lives end Lord Jesus accept of me and so powerfully and graciously assist me that I may savingly behold thee in thy blessed promises that I may happily enjoy thee in thy holy Ordinances that I may clearly see and joyfully confess what great things thou hast done for my poor soul that I may be dayly ravished with apprehension of thine exceeding love and hourly husied with recounting thy endless praise Lord make me to forsake the sins and miseries of this life make me more watchful over my corrupt heart more zealous of thy glory and thy childrens good that I may never willingly offend thee but wholly sacrifise the short remainder of my dayes unto thee that so my heart and my flesh may triumphantly rejoice in thee the living God Mortifie my corruptions support my weakness accept my willingness Let this my humiliation before thee be a pleasing sacrifice unto thee for his alone sake whose precious life thy rich mercie hath sacrifised to thy Justice for me Lord hear me and have mercy on me for his alone sake whom thou hast freely given unto me that I may truly love thee devoutly serve thee earnestly imbrace thee eternally enjoy thee Amen CHAP. 10. Upon a Journey undertaken and the many dangers incident thereunto I Am now going from mine own home and know not whether I shall ever return God I know hath set a pâ—riod to my dayes beyond which I cannot pass but when or where or how my life shall end I am uncertain Many are the dangers that attend this sinfull life and many more my sins that have deserv'd them I can neither number the one nor foresee the other this is the wretched and the sad condition of my body and without unfeigned sorrow for my sins the much more wofull case of my distressed soul Lord there is nothing so sweet as thy love nothing so safe as thy protection and yet I have carelessy neglected the one and thou mayst now justly deny me the other thou hast woed me to mercy and I have refused to come thou hast graciously invited me by thy continuall preservations by thy fatherly sustentations by thy gentle corrections by thy faithfull promises and thy rich performances Blessed Lord how wonderfull are thy compassions towards me when I am unthankfull for thy many favours when I am unmindfull of mine own miseries even then thou graciously providest for me and yet for all this I have not hitherto resolved seriously to come unto thee Such and so many are my sins so great is my unthankfulness that I now tremble to appear before thee and yet so tender is thy mercy to me that thou again allurest me to comfort and contentment Lord into the blessed bosom of thy love I cast my self for safety and protection and in the midst of danger even in death it self will joyfuliy rely upon thee For thou O Lord art my strong rock and fortress unto which I will alwaies resort Lord keep me as the apple of thine eye hide me under the shaddow of thy wings Strengthen my weak faith against the strong assaults of Satan support and comfort me in all the fears and terrors of mine own accusing conscience protect and keep me in this present journey let thy holy Angels be my blessed Guardians to protect me in life to preserve me in death to assist me after death O let me never grieve those blessed Spirits which though invisibly yet most assuredly are my attendants Lord as thou hast given them readyness and cheerfulness of mind to watch my preservation and further my salvation so give me carefulness and constancy of soul to joy them in my life and conversation And seeing Lord I cannot know my hour of dissolution O teach me so to number my days that I may apply my heart unto heavenly wisdom that I may obtain a sweet assurance of thy love in Christ unfeigned sorrow for my sins a sincere and constant heart to thy service and a cheerfull readiness at thy call Amen CHAP. 11. Containing pious Meditations and zealous Ejaculations after a Journey I Am now by Gods gracious providence returned safe unto mine earthly home but am still travelling to my heavenly There is nothing in this life but labour and sorrow nothing in that but rest and happiness and yet I dote upon the one and neglect the other Lord if my treasure were with thee my heart would be there allso When thou givest me more knowledge of thee I shall have more desire to come unto thee When my sins have made me more sensible of mine own misery thy Grace I trust will make me more capable of thy sweet mercy Lord if this vain unquietness be so refreshing to my mortall body how truly blessed will thy heavenly rest be to mine immortall soul When thou Lord wilt wipe away all tears from mine eyes all akings from my heart when there shall be no more death neither sorrow nor crying nor any more pain when soul and body shall triumphantly and joyfully repose themselves in thee for ever when they shall drink freely of the rivers of thy pleasures and be for ever satisfied with the fatness of thy house I confess my self unworthy to enjoy this outward rest in this mine earthy home much more unworthy to enjoy that inward rest that sweet assurance of a lively hope to be partaker of eternall rest How wretched is my body without this outward quietness How much more wre ched is my soul without thee Thou O Lord art my shield to defend me my staff to uphold me my food to sustain me my wine to glad me my beloved to embrace me my pleasure to delight me my joy to ravish me my sweet and sate repose for ever to refresh me Let this teach me Lord to fix my thoughts on heaven and heavenly things to use this world soberly in thee and to thee to view it truly as it is a barren wilderness a transitory vain and empty thing far inconsistent with my reall happiness to desire nothing to enjoy nothing in the creature but onely in and unto thee the great Creator so shall no vain pleasure bewitch me no unjust profit beguil me no sudden sorrow dismay me no terrors of conscience affright me To thee O thou soveraign of my soul do I devote the remnant of my sinfull dayes to love thee to praise thee to honour thee to rest in thee for ever Lord wean me from the sins and miseries of this life and raise my thoughts to immortality Let the sweetness of thy heavenly joyes relieve the harshness of my worldly sorrows that misery may
be swallowed up of mercy and frailty of eternity Vnite me in a blessed union with thee that I may constantly adhere unto thee and be for ever graciously accepted of thee O give me a sweet complacency of soul in thy service and a willing and a dutifull obedience unto thy commands Lord give me a thankful heart for all thy mercies to me for thy continuall preservation for thy blessed supportation for the injoyment of thy needfull comforts in this life and for the glorious hopes of those in that to come Blessed God so sublimate my sinfull soul that I may see the richness of thy love in Christ that I may soberly enjoy thy blessings here and faithfully exspect thy joyes hereafter Lord all that I have without thee is meer emptiness and nothing meer vanity and worse than nothing my glory shame mine honor ignominy my health ruin my riches poverty my gain loss my pleasure pain my laughter madness Thou O Lord art all in all unto me O grant that nothing may withdraw my service from thee that no inticing pleasure may allure me that no distracting care or sinfull sorrow may disturb me but that my soul may now and ever safely and contentedly rely upon thee Lord thou seest all my desires and my continuall groanings are not hid from thee Thou alone knowest how weary I am of the sinful travailes of this life how earnestly I long to be at rest with thee Lord pardon all my sins and put an end to all my miseries Come Lord Jesus come quickly wipe away all tears from mine eyes and bring me to that rest of thine which never shall have end Amen CHAP. 12. Upon the great danger of Security DEceive not thy self O my Soul it is not so easy a matter to inherit Heaven as thou imaginest there will be much fighting sweating bleeding much compunction of soul subjection of body hard pressing towards the mark for the price of the high calling in Christ Iesus before this happy conquest can be gained Consâ—der therefore in what condition thou now standest what ground thou hast gained of thy corrupt nature how much better thou art this day than the day past than the year past than thy whole life past nay rather how much worse by adding sin unto sin by drinking in iniquity like water by treasuring up wrath against the day of wrath and revelation of thy righteous judgement Philosophy will tell thee that in all naturall motions the nearer they are to ending the more violent their motion is Divinity will tell thee that in old age thou wilt be fat and well liking what increase of love hast thou to Gods Law what growth of hatred against sin what bosome-sin hast thou parted with what gratious improvement hast thou made in Knowledge Faith Repentance Love and all those other gifts and graces which concur to thy perfection Holy Saint Anselm was often heard to say If I could from hence behold the pains of hell from thence the horrour of sin I would rather embrace those pains than this horrour O what growth of grace was here how far am I from this degree of holinesse how easily perswaded to delude my self with shews and shadows of perfection There is no attaining unto happinesse without holy violence without beating down my body without cherishing my soul if I conquer not here I cannot triumph hereafter Lord when I look into the strictnesse of the lives of thy Saints I much lament the folly of mine own I see holy David in sackcloth and ashes consuming whole daies and nights in mourning for sâ—n washing his bed with his tears afflicted in body tormented in soul grieving crying roaring for unquietnesse of heart Blessed Paul subduing his body by fasting watching praying toyling in the Ministry and thou my blessed Saviour in continuall labour and sorrow for my sake how vain is my trust how false my hope how great my errour to believe I run when I stand still to expect a triumph without a victory a victory without a combat Lord if many that strive to enter in at the strait gate yet shall not be able what shall become of me who am so far from coming to thee that I every day am running from thee who am not onely opposite unto thee but even enmity it self against thee Sometimes I feel the stings and gripings of a wounded conscience I know my self to be a grievous sinner but I quiet my disturbances by thee my Saviour I willingly accept of mercy from thee but grudgingly repine at service to thee thou biddest me indeed to drink freely of the waters of life but thou commandest me allso to make my calling and election sure to work out my salvation with fear and trembling thou ordainest not the end without the means if I rebelliously neglect the one thou mayâ—st most righteously deny me the other Lord what can it profit me to enjoy the pleasures of sin for a season when I deprive my soul of happinesse for ever O let this teach me to deplore my dangerous condition to goe on chearfully in the waies of godlinesse to think no cost too much no pains too great no grief too good to purchase Heaven to consider seriously that time once past can never be recall'd that this hour may be my last and bring me to eternity of torments where the stream is stillest there the chanell is deepest where there is least distrust there is usually most danger Satan therefore disturbs me not because I sleep in death But when thou Lord shalt open mine eyes to see the subtilty of this Deceiver I shall then find that the waters of sin are gone over my soul that I am wofully drowned in the great depth of security and can expect nothing without mercy but Satans cruelty and mine own endlesse misery To that sweet mercy therefore I appeal with earnestnesse of soul and humblenesse of heart bemoaning my sinnes bewailing my transgressions O Lord my God when I consider of thy gratious goodnesse and mine own vilenesse I am utterly ashamed to appear in thy presence Thou hast often called me to repentance but I have not hearkned unto thee thou hast lovingly invited me to mercy but I have wilfully refused thou hast clothed me with thine own garment and I have shamefully defiled it thou hast enriched me with thy grace and I have robbed thee of thine honour All this and infinitely more than this thou hast freely done for me the worst of sinners and yet for all this I have rebelliously forsaken thee and most ungratiously been most unmindfull of thee And now Lord seeing that I am dead and putrified in sins and rotten in corruptions what else can I expect from thee but to be buried out of thy sight and yet thou still sayest unto me live O thou blessed Fountain of eternall good convey those happy streams of comfort to my sinfull soul that may revive me from the grave of misery open mine eies that I may see thee in thy
and with thy blessed Apostle that I know assuredly that the sufferings of this life shall work for me a far greater and more exceeding weight of glory in that to come To thee therefore O thou blessed Guardian of my sinfull soul and wretched body doe I addresse my self for safety and protection I confesse O Lord there is no one minute of my whole life can be safe without thy gratious providence and yet so wretched have I been that few or none of them have been devoted to thy service Lord I am not worthy of the least of all thy mercies and of all thy truth thou hast afforded me even the very best of all my actions hath justly merited the very worst of all thy punishments and yet thou daily loadest me with thy blessings allthough I hourly sin against thee by my great transgressions Forgive me my unmindfulnesse of these thy mercies my great unthankfulnesse for all thy favours and fix my sinfull soul more willingly more joyfully more fervently more constantly on thy service Teach me to keep a catalogue of thy mercies to let none passe without a thankfull and devout acknowledgement to set some daies apart from the year some hours from each day to praise thee for them Forgive the pride of my prosperity my carelesnesse of thee my coldnesse unto thine my crossenesse unto others my cruelty to my self Lord pardon my repinings in adversity my distast of thy power my distrust of thy providence my deniall of thy wisdome my refusall of thy love my contempt of thy favour my neglect of thy grace my despair of thy goodnesse O give me such a blessed frame of heart that I may chearfully and joyfully content my self to walk in whatsoever paths thy blessed providence shall lead me to O hold thou up my goings in those paths that my feet slip not teach me to make a gratious and a sweet improvement of these outward crosses a blessed and a wise advantage of thine inward graces Lord lead me by thy counsell here and afterwards receive me to thy glory Amen CHAP. 16. Upon sinfull Anger and the great disturbance thereof Lord WHen I consider of thy patience and long-suffering towards me a miserable sinner of the lowlinesse of thy Saints and of the great humility and meeknesse of my Saviour in his sufferings I much deplore the wofull weaknesse of mine own infirmities and more admire the richnesse of thy goodnesse in admitting me to speak unto thee What pleasure Lord canst thou take in that service which is all sin how canst thou delight in that which thou abhorrest thou art a God of pure eyes and canst not behold iniquity if all my righteousnesse be in thy sight as filthy rags and menstiuous clothes how full of uglinesse and deformity will my sins then appear before thee Ah Lord thou hast often seâ—n how easily how suddenly how wretchedly I have been swallowed up of sinfull passion how I have violated that invaluable peace which thou hast given me by revengefull thoughts by despightfull words by disturbing actions I know nothing in my corrupt nature but to know my self miserable I see nothing in this misery but terrour and confusion affliction to my body destruction to my soul all occurrences of this life should have rather added to my growth of grace than disturbance of nature I have hitherto been grossely mistaken in calling that a defect of my body which is in truth an error in my soul Nature was at first created pure no disobedience was then in the passions Man hath marred it by his Fall all the Streams that are now troubled flow from this Fountain this barren excuse therefore is so far from lessening sin that it makes it bigger I am now so much the more stained by committing actuall sin as I should have been more holy and am not since original Lord let this teach me to deal truly with my soul to uncloath my self of all sinfull excuses that so sin may appear truly what it is and may become out of measure sinfull that mine Anger may be holy my application of it happy that nothing may disturb me but sin that I may be a Lyon in thy cause a Lamb in mine own that when I hate the sin I may love the person when I rebuke the offence I may pray heartily for the offender so shall I zealously enjoy thee my God religiously embrace my neighhour patiently possess mine own soul And now Lord as thou hast given me an heart to confess my sins of impatience before thee so give me a sweet assurance in my Saviour that by him I have assured pardon for them If thou Lord for my sinfull Anger shalt inflict upon me thy severe wrath and for my long continuing in my sins the long duration of thy punishments yet let not thy severitie exceed the measure of my Christian charity though thou continuest my miseries yet withdraw not thy mercies O make me more and more humble unto thee my God and more and more meek amongst thy children conform me to that blessed pattern of true piety and patience that as a sheep in thy hands my blessed Shearer so I may be dumb and not open my mouth against thee Lord banish from me all desires of revenge let Patience have its perfect work to quiet me here and crown me hereafter I confess my self to be a great and grievous sinner and yet I am thy creature my body is thine and my soul is thine both were joyned in thy creation and both are joyned in my devotion both have sinned against thee O let them both be humbled before thee not to satisfie thy Justice but to implore thy Mercy not to merit thy Grace but to magnifie thy Goodness Lord make me truly sensible of the greatness of thy misery that I may the more devoutly the more sincerely sue to thee for mercy Forgive the many violent erupcions of my sinfull passions give me a meek and humble spirit that I may happily enjoy thy presence and mine own content Lord grant that I may patiently and joyfully imbrace the wrongs and injuries of this life for thy sake who hast been patient even to death for mine Let that be made easie unto me by thy grace which by nature is impossible that nothing may delight me but thy love nothing grieve me but thy displeasure nothing offend me but thy dishonour Amen CHAP. 17. Upon mans inordinate love to the Creature WO is me that I am constrained to live in Meshech and to dwell in the tents of Cedar wo is me that I was conceived in sin that I was born in sin and that I have so long been captive to the power of sin How vain am I how wretched to beguil my self of rest and quietness O how unworthy to defile my Mariage vows to prostitute my love to these unclean and false embraces of a sâ—nfull world to dig unto my self these broken Cisterns of impure and empty joys and to forsake those living waters of
eternall life O wofull cateif if I well consider what I am but sar more wofull if I seriously consider what I should be Lord when I was in my blood thou saidst unto me Live when I was cast out and none eye pittied me then thou hadst mercy on me when I was naked thou clothedst me when I was wounded thou healedst me nay more Lord thou didst uncloath thy self for me and by thy wounds I am healed when I was loathsom in mine own eyes I was beautifull in thine and when all this is not yet enough to manifest thy wonderfull compassions towards me thou feedest me at thine own Table thou lodgest me in thine own bosom thou makest me partaker of thine own inheritance Blessed God what couldest thou have done more for me that thou hast not done And yet for all this I forsake thee I neglect thee I abuse thee I adulterate those many vows and promises I made unto thee And now Lord when I am even ashamed to present my self before thee when my false heart hath been so great a stranger to thy blessed bosom that I am even afraid to kneel to thee for mercy thou graciously forgivest me thou bemoanest my sin thou hidest my shaure thou makest love unto me and to the wonder of my soul delightest still to set thy love upon me Thou O my blessed Saviour hast told me that if I were of this World it would love me but now I am not of this World that the World hateth me Lord what madness is this in me to love mine utter enemy to delight in her bosom which hunteth for my precious life to forlake thee the pleasant Lilly of the Vallies the sweet Refreshments of Eternity to weary out and wound my soul amongst the Bryars of this barren Wilderness Thou Lord hast sayd unto me Arise my Love my Fair one and come away thou invitest me from the showers and tempests of a stormy Winter from the cares and troubles of a discontented life to the sweet dews of thy graces the gentle breathings of thy Spirit the tender buds of thy love the lovely blossems of thy goodness the pleasant fruit of thy promises the joyfull crop of thy performances And notwithstanding all this I still cry yet a little more sleep yet a little more number yet a little more folding of the hands together yet a little more sin yet a little more shame yet a little more sorrow Ah Lord what is there in the creature that thus strangely bewitcheth me or rather what is there not in it that is not every minute ready to betray me and dispoyl me of those precious ornaments of soul which thou hast given me the cares and crosses of this life asflict me the pleasures besot me the profits disturb me pride puffeth me up and even mine own heart deceiveth me by calling good evill and evill good by making that sweet in the expectation which is bitter in the fruition Lord while I have sought the creature I have lost my self my body in distempers my soul in distractions That precious Faith which is the ground of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen whose end is the salvation of my soul which is thy gift who art the God of truth is now drowned in a sea of error and justly given up to believe dreams and delusions and doctrines of Devils to trust wholly in vanity and to follow after lying That saving knowledge by which I was formerly enlightned in thy sacred Truths is now blinded with the soggy mists of sin and ignorance This Lord is my great aggravation and just condemnation that light is come into the world and I have loved darkness better than light That glorious hope which maketh not ashamed but exspecteth an inheritance eternall in the heavens which fadeth not away is now become a vain and empty hope delighted with sin rewarded with shame Those blessed affections by which my happy soul was wont to walk in thy wayes and to delight it self in thy commands are now wearied out in wayes of wickedness and that heart which hath so often promised obedience unto thee any thy Laws hath now forsaken thee the living God and made a covenant with death and hell Thus am I robbed and spoyled of all and am become poor and wretched and blind and naked and miserable my whole head is sick and my whole heart is faint I have sown in iniquity and must reap in asfliction I am intoxicated with the wine of Errour that stings me like a Scrpent and bites me like a Cockatrice and yet when I awake such is the sadnesse of my present condition I say I will seek it yet still Lord he that is once out of thy path knoweth not the length of his journey and may well fear to lose himself for ever And now Lord what is my hope truly my hope is even in thee thou seest my weaknesse and acceptest my willingnesse thou that knowest it impossible that the world should be overcome by me biddest me be of good comfort because thou Lord hast overcome the world for me if I fight not against thee though I am often foyled yet I am more than conquerour in thee O let this teach me joyfully to rely upon thee to make thee the height of my joy the end of my desires the onely happy and eternall object of my sinfull soul Lord I heartily defire thee I thankfully embrace thee and doe for ever vow my soul and body to thee Suffer me not to wander from thy blessed presence let me not longer dally nor dissemble with my soul O let me not think that I then love thee when I love but my self in thee make me now at last to know those blessed things that belong to my peace lest they be for ever hid from mine eyes Lord by thy rich mercy I can now plainly see the vanity and emptinesse of all these earthly objects the folly and misery of those that rest in them the rest and quietnesse of those that least rely upon them in this tranfitory beauty of the Creature I can now behold the ravishing perfections of the great Creatoâ—r Lord I now exceedingly desire to know thee that I may for ever love thee that I may be sick of love till I enjoy thee that I may joyfully rest in thee and be eternally united to thee For thou Lord art infinitely sweeter than the sweetnesse of thy Creatwes they are all but emptinesse and vanity but in thy presence is the fulnesse of joy and at thy right hand there are pleasures for evermore O thou blessed Fountain of eternall goodnesse forgive me mine offences cover my sins and fix my soul upon the sweetnesse of thy heavenly joyes give me constancy and steadinesse of heart to cleave unto thee and for thy mercy sake remove all vain desires that may betray me from thee O thou blessed Saviour of my sinfull soul by whose persect obedience all my disobedience is forgiven me who hast given
thy self for me and to me give me allso unfeigned repentance that I may heartily bewail the sinfulnesse of my life past that I may make a gratious improvement of my life present and faithfully perform the vows and promises which I make unto thee for the short remainder of my life to come O blessed and eternall Comforter of all those sinfull souls that put their trust in thee give me a sweet and full assurance of thy love in Christ withdraw my wretched heart from vanity inflame it with an earnest and affectionate desire to thee open mine eyes that I may see some glimps of thy celestiall joyes prepared for me make me often to think of them earnestly to long for them and readily and chearfully to part with all these earthly pleasures to enjoy them Lord make me able to encounter and withstand the strong assaults of Satan and this evill world give me thy saving grace and take from me what thou wilt without thy blessed presence all these outward joyes are wearinesse and emptinesse without thee even life it self is bitternesse unto me without thy love I ask it not of thee yea I rather beg thee Lord to take it from me that so I may be joyfully released from the bondage of a sinfull body that I may love thee with a pure and spotlesse soul that all mine imperfections may be done away that so I may securely dwell with thee in perfect holinesse and endlesse happinesse Amen CHAP. 18. Upon the sin of Uncleannesse with encouragements to avoid it COnsider O my Soul in what a blessed relation thou now standest to thy God thou hast lately grieved for thy sins and God hath allso gratiously accepted of thy sorrow and thou art now at peace and union with him his holy Spirit is thy Comforter his holy Providence thy Guide his holy Angels thy Guardians his holy Saints thine Assistants the Creatures without thee are at league and union with thee and thy Conscience within thee is a continuall feasâ— unto thee while thus thou continuest thy safety is inviolable thy joy unutterable thy peace unalterable Who can expresse the blessednesse of this condition how ravishing is this reviving presence of the gladding Spirit by which thou art sustained sweetly here by which thou shalt be joyfully refresht hereafter Wilt thou now lose all this O my Soul for this false this foul this momentany pleasure wilt thou lodge this beastly sin where thou now lodgest thy Redeemer Consider how vain it is how bitter it will be think how many sad thoughts how many aking hearts how many wounding sighs this fall of thine will cost thee what distempers of body what disturbance of soul what unquietnesse of sleep what checks of conscience what inward sadnesse in thy greatest merriment and which is worst of all what a fearfull apprehension of Gods wrath in this life and wofull expectation of judgement and suffering of extremity of pains in Hell for ever Let not the vain hope of Gods mercy flatter thee for while he is mercifull he will be just yea his mercy shall provoke his justice if his patience and long-suffering doe not lead thee into timely repentance his wrath and fury shall surely lead thee out to greater condemnation If custome perswade thee let custome allso reclame thee if thy flesh murmur thy spirit will rejoyce O how happy wilt thou find this opposition how glorious this victory even but one blessed thought of amendment is of more value than an age of sin Holy Saint Augustine who was wont to nourish his lascivious flesh and thought it then impossible to live without the lustfull kisses of his Roman Dames when once he had but relished the ravishing embraces of eternity brake forth into this sweet and most divine expression How truly sweet is the losse of this earthly sweetnesse those transitory joyes which I was formerly afraid to lose I now rejoyce to banish it was thou O Lord who didst thrust them out it is thou O Lord who art entred in who art sweeter than all sweetnesse c. Lord let this example move me to a blessed imitation of this blessed Saint to take heed of holding conference with Satan to labour to repell the very first motions to sin if I delight in his discourse I shall soon consent to his counsell if he feel me resist I shall find him give ground Lord let me remember what I fight for and follow my advantage with courage and successe that when my daies of warfare shall determine I may say with joy and comfort with thy blessed Apostle I have fought a good fight I have kept the faith I have finished my course from henceforth there is laid up for me a crown of righteousnesse which the Lord the righteous Judge shall give me at that day and not unto me onely but unto all those that love and expect the day of his appearing 2 Tim. 4.7 8. Lord Thou hast often seen the weaknesse of thy sinfull servant how willingly how wretchedly I have been yeelding to the false allurements of my sinfull flesh how basely I have given ground even upon the very first assault without desire of resistance without care of repentance I have hitherto been so far from sorrowing for this sin that I have much delighted in it and often grieved thee my God in framing of excuses for it Blessed God how rich is that peace which I enjoy by thee how glorious that hope which I possesse in thee how wonderfull that mercy I obtain from thee and yet how carelesly how coldly have I parted from thee Lord forgive what is past restrain what is present prevent what is to come O let me enjoy no sweetnesse but in thee who art nearer to me than I can be to my self who art sweeter to me than the sweetnesse of these earthly pleasures O give me such a blessed frame of heart such Angel-like integrity of soul that my thoughts may be chast my desires holy my words gratious my actions good Give me a double portion of thy blessed Spirit that I may double my obedience to thy sweet commands that I may tast the comforts of thy heavenly joyes and utterly abhor the false allurements of this sinfull world Let the sweet showers of thy distilling graces allay these motions of concupiscence extinguish these devouring flames of lust that I may constantly and happily oppose this darling sin to my last hour and joyfully triumph with thee for ever Amen CHAP. I. Upon immoderate Mirth and the sinfull inconveniencies thereof Lord IF I were this day to dye If thou shouldest now say unto me Give an account of thy Stewardship for thou shalt be no longer St ward if mine Audit were at this instant to be given up and all mine actions this present hour to be accountâ—d for how sadly should I look upon that lost time which hath been spent in sin how many vain Items must needs appear to my deserved shame and ondless forrow So many minutes wasted in
unclean and wanton cogitations so many dayes and nights in frivolous and idle discourse so many weeks and moneths and yeares in vain and finfull actions How full of horror and confusion would this Account appear even to mine own eies With what face should I dare present itunto thine What would I not now give to purchase but some small respite to redeem this wofull waste this vain expence of time What serious vows and faithfull promises should I now make of amendment What constant houres would be now dedicated to thy service my whole life would now seem too little to bewail my solly to redeem my loss O what madness is it then while I have dayes of mercy to despise them to abuse them to be utterly neglective of them What is it Lord that I so eagerly persue Even the very heighth of all mine outward happiness is but a short crackling of thorns a sudden blaze which may seem to warm me but can never throughly heat me Wo be to that soul for ever that can find no refreshment but in this momentany fire If thy Grace Lord cannot warm me thy Glory will not comfort me There can be no true joy but in godly sorrow The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning the heart of fools in the house of mirth Eccl. 7.6 The luxurious Wanton may be carnally joyfull but the penitent Christian is cordially merry There is no better tryal of this truth Lord than from thine own mouth who wert a man of sorrows thou O Lord hast told me That I shall weep but the world shall rejoyce that I shall sorrow but my sorrow shall be turned into joy and my joy shall no man take from me John 16.20 Deceive not thy self therefore O my soul for if thou walkest too far in this enticing path thou art out of thy way to Heaven and thou mayst go so far in it as to lose thy self and by a customary freedom of thy Christian liberty soon find so great an indisposition unto God and goodness that unless the blessed Shepheard of thy soul vouchsafe to find thee by his saving grace it is improbable nay it is impossible that thou shouldst ever return Canst thou be so sensless to believe that thou art Christs Disciple when thou wilt not bear his Cross Did ever any of his followers enjoy heaven without violence without beating down their bodies without cherishing their soules without much weeping fasting praying sighing groaning for their sins without being crucified unto the world and the world unto them without checking and controlling their unruly lusts without utterly forsaking all this earthly trash and joyfully accounting it as loss and dung to possess Christ Look upon the Prophets Apostles Martyrs Virgins Fathers of the Church and all the blessed company of Saints in all times places Ages of the world and thou shalt find them all to use this world as if they used it not quietly sparingly soberly Isaac at his evening devotion in the solitary fields Eliah at his private Carmel the Baptist in the desart St. Paul in his desires out of the body and with Christ holy Simeon in his Pillar Saint Jerome in his Cave all of them and innumerable more of Gods Saints were true Benonies sonnes of sorrow and affliction Lord with how much fervour and alacrity of soul did these thy blessed ones pursue thy heavenly joyes what sharp combats had they to overcome themselves And if such chosen and select vessels as these have had such great strivings such powerfull conflicts with their finfull bodies what will become of me thâ—t have obeyed sin in the lusts thereof that can find no pleasure but in folly no laughter but in madness Consider therefore O my soul whilst thou hast yet time that there is no truer character of a graeeless heart than prophane mirth thou art too ready to believe that God is mercifull that all thy sins may be forgiven thee in a moment that the good Thief was saved at the last hour and that therefore thou mayst still go on in wickedness God indeed is allwayes ready to shew mercy but it is onely unto those that are ready to repent And how knowed thou whether God will accept thee in that hour Whether he may not whether he will not then withdraw his saving grace from that sinfull soul which hath so long withdrawn it self from his service This is that which thy blessed Saviour telleth thee Not every one which crieth Lord Lord shall enter into the Kingdom of heaven but he that doth the will of my Father which is in heaven Matth. 7 21. And lest perpaps that one example of the dying Penitent may flatter thee considâ—r of the time the place the manner of his strange conversion This was assuredly saith St Augustine to manifest the power and Godhead of a dying Saciour and that upon the rare consession of an Infidell and that at such a time when all the world forsook him and even his own Disciples either doubted or denied his Godhead Alass how little comfort canst thou now reap from this example how should it rather affright thee to see buâ— one soul amongst so many millions to obtain mercy at the last hour that upon such weighty circumstances on what a weak foundation doest thou build thy hopes of happiness how easily will that devouring storm of thine accusing conscience ruin it and then how great the fall will be the fearfull horror of thy lost estate will wofully express Lord let this teach me to redeem those precious hours which I have lost O let each wanton thought each idle word be monitors to tell me how my Audit stands with heaven I can speak nothing I can doe nothing which I can recall each circumstance of sin is charged in mine account and must be reckoned for how careful should this make me of the-expense of that time that is recorded for eternity Thou O Lord art holyness it self thy Saints and Angels are holy and thy children must be holy nothing but holiness can inherit heaven no unclean pleasure no impure joy shall enter there How can I ever hope to be an inhabitant of that holy City whose heavenly language I cannot speak And now Lord seeing these things are thus by thine assisting grace I seriously resolve to allow my self no pleasure in this life but what is sanctified with moderation because I clearly see these outward pleasures to be onely so far usefull unto me as by them I am made more serviceable unto thee Moderate and honest repast sets an edge upon my soul and makes it more earnest more-active in devotion when I take up pleasure as a trade I become a Traytor to my body a Tyrant to my soul Lord I am now heartily in love with heaven and grudge at that hours liberty in outward merriment that maketh not the next more eager of mine inward comfort There is no sweetness but in goodness and there is no goodness in that mirth which is not
a Father thou wilt abhor that sin that hath so much provoked his displeasure thou wilt most solemnly protest against it and seriously resolve for ever to avoyd it thy sin will be ever before thee to humble thee here to exalt thee hereafter Thy degrees of sin will have thy degrees of sorrow thy measure of pollution will require thy measure of sanctification As thou hast given up thy members to be servants of sin so thou must now yeeld them up to be weapons of righteousness as thou hast been drowned in pleasure so thou must be drencht in tears yea those tears will be thy dayly food to nourish thee in grace to enrich thee in glory O how truly-blessed is that soul which hath unfeignedly resolved on this good this great this necessary work that can cheerfully and joyfully express it self with holy David and say Lord I am bowed down greatly I goe mourning all the day long I have roared out for very anguish and unquietness of heart If thou hast Davids sorrow O my soul thou shalt assuredly have Davids joy thou shalt say with him allso Lord I am thy child and the son of thine handmaid thou hast broken my bonds in sunder Psal 116.16 Satan may now tempt thee and through thy frailty and infirmity prevail against thee but to become a customer to evill the powers of hell cannot entice thee a thousand worlds are not now of that value with thee as the joyfull remembrance of thy passed dangers thy present comfort thy future safety Thou hast now seen O my soul how absolutely necessary this great work is think now how happy will be the performance how full of danger the delay the longer thou continuest in sin the more remote thou art from grace What extreme folly is this in thee to deprive thy self of that friend of whom thou hast most need If thou findest thy self so backward to this holy duty now how averse wilt thou be hereafter when sin is more deeply rooted in thee the devill in more firm possession of thee and God himself removed further off from thee From whence now are these false hopes these vain promises of future happiness how darest thou refuse these gracious offers of eternity how full of doubtfulness and extreme hazard is this false assurance of that holy Spirit which thou hast so often grieved Be not deceived God is not mocked look what a man soweth even that shall he reap he that soweth in the flesh shall reap corruption he that soweth in the Spirit life everlasting If thou wilt not hear Gods call in this life he will not hear thine in that to come if thou wilt not mourn for thy sins here thou shalt howl for them for ever And who shall then have pitty upon thee or who shall be sorry for thee or who shall pray for thy peace thou hast abandoned me saith God thou hast gone from me and now will I stretch out my hand against thee to destroy thee Jerem. 15.5 6 Lord let this teach me to deal truly with my self to search narrowly for sin timely for sorrow and speedily for pardon Seek the Lord O my soul while he may be found for in the great water-floods of his eternall wrath thou shalt not come nigh him Lord I have sinned and I desire to repent I have layen long festering in the grave of sin and cannot be now raised without a miracle I have sinned in delight in consent in action in custom in long continuance of custom without remorse of conscience without thought of repentance I am grown old and impudent in sin and am no more worthy to be called thy child Lord I am become loathsom to my self how much more odious unto thee who art a God of pure eyes and canst behold none iniquitie I have sinned against thee I cannot repent but by thee my transgression is active my obedience passive I can no more arise from sin than death even this desire of sorrow is from thee the repair of my corruption is the work of thy creation when thou hast raised me by thy grace thou supportest me by thy goodnesse thou leadest me by thy providence thou drawest me by thy patience thou compellest mee by thy power Such is my weakness such is my feebleness by nature that I cannot rise without thee that I cannot stand without thee when I am raised by thee such is my strength such is my ability by grace that I am able to go with thee that I am joyfull to run after thee Lord quicken and revive me from the death of sin and grave of misery sustain my wounded conscience with the sweetness of thy saving promises let thy patience and long-suffering lead me in to repentance thy holy Spirit unto perfect holiness and endless happiness Lord Jesus draw me and I shall joyfully run after thee my body in obedience to my soul my soul and body in obedience to thy blessed will more zealously more willingly more constantly to my lives end Amen CHAP. 21. Upon Servile fear and the danger thereof NO child can fear his father as lie ought that is not jealous of his fathers honour that is not feelingly affected with his injuries and zealously devoted to perpetuate his praise and it is as equally impossible that this father can affect that son whose obedience is rather enforced by power than invited by affection If this be so in Nature it is much more so in Grace for thou O Lord art now a double father to me thou art my father by creation and my father by redemption Lord as thou hast doubled thy goodness towards me I should have doubled my return of thankfulness towards thee Thy love to me is absolute no breach can dissolve it no time determine it thy love to me was from the beginning and whom thou lovest thou lovest to the end My love to thee is fickle false and full of imperfections and if my filiall fear even in my rest performances be full of spots and blemishes in thy sight how most deformed shall I appear when I serve thee with an irreligious and ungodly fear when I doe thy will repiningly and coldly not for love of thy mercy but for fear of thy justice when I am knowingly and willingly consenting to thy great dishonour when I am so zealous in the worlds cause yea too too often in the devils cause and so benummed in thine when sorrows dismay me and sins delight me Ah Lord how far am I from what I ought to be If I go on in this path I perish everlastingly while I continue in this course of disobedience I hang over hell fire by the slender twig of an uncertain life and if that once break my loss is irrecoverable Thou Lord hast sayd it and thy word is truth He which denieth me before men him will I deny before my Father which is in heaven Lord let this teach me to delight in thy service to be jealous of thine honor to thirst for thy
with this subject thou hast just cause to suspect thy loving to fear thy enjoying it for Where thy treasure is there will thy heart be also If thou livest the life of Pleasure thou art so much worse than a beast by how much thou oughtest by reason to be better if of Action thou art so much nearer to happiness as reason is beyond sense and yet so much farther off as Grace is beyond Nature if the happy life of heavenly Meditation thou art so far above vanity as heaven is above earth as immotality above nature as glory above corruption O how sweet are those thoughts which lead me to Eternity which raise my soul above the reach of humane misery that can support me under all the heavy pressures of sin under all the grievous burdens of sorrow under all the sharp assaults of Satan that 〈◊〉 make me merry in life and triumphant in death Nothing can more truly represent me to my self and inform me that I am all earthly than the dullness and backwardness of my thoughts to be heavenly Who can ever hope to be an inhabitant of that City whose language hee cannot speak Lord when my thoughts are more zealously affected with thy heavenly joys I shall then hope to be more frequently acquainted with thy heavenly visits by my careless neglect of the one I am now justly deprived of the sweet enjoyments of the other while I am wedded to this wretched world my thoughts must needs favour of corruption But if thou Lord wilt once open mine eyes to see the glorious beauty of my heavenly home I shall then know and joyfully confesse that one hour thus spent will adde more comfort to my fool more true content to my desires than all these outward blessings and I shall then account and joyfully confess with thy Apostle that all things are but loss and dung in compare of the richness of thy love in Christ Jesus For thou O blessed Saviour art the blessed Fountain of eternall happiness the joy of my heart the triumph of my joy the comfort of my life the safety of my body the rest of my soul without thee I am far worse than nothing and with thee I enjoy all things for thou art in the Father and I in thee and thou in me and in this happy union is contained that fruition is enjoyed that for ever-blessed vision in which the souls and bodies of thy Saints eternally delight themselves O thou soveraign of my soules eternall comfort how unworthy am I to enjoy thee that have been hitherto so much unâ—indfull of thee how undeserving to behold thee in thy glory that am so daily guilty of thy great dishonour Lord raise my thoughts to immortality and fix my soul upon the love of sweet eternity let my chiefest joy be ever to contemplate thee who art my chiefest good Pardon those wretched hours that have been lost in search of outward happiness O make me to redeem them by abandoning the creature and placing mine affections wholly on the beauty of the great Creatour expatiate my sinfull soul with daily meditations of my future joyes that I may love thee more fervently fear thee more dutifully desire thee more earnestly long for thee more heartily embrace thee more faithfully and think of thee more joyfully to my lives end Amen CHAP. 33. Upon unchristianlike Dejectedness in Poverty WHY doe I excruciate my soul with apprehension of a seeming evill how unworthy am I of this life which I hold from that God whom I dare not trust will God feed me with the delicates of heaven and not give me bread will he give me full draughts of the rivers of his eternall pleasures and not afford me temporall refreshments shall my death be precious in his eyes and my life uncomfortable in mine own can there be any evill and the Lord hath not done it shall he doe it and shall I complain if poverty be evill in it self yet it is good for me the evill of sin hath drawn upon me this evill of punishment so this evill is from nature and the good from grace By this affliction I am weaned from the world and made desirous of my heavenly home I am now put in mind that my treasure being there my heart should be there allso I am now fully assured by my patience and humility under this affliction and by the quiet fruits of righteousness it daily bringeth forth in me that I am Gods child that as I am now made partaker of my Saviours sufferings so I shall be hereafter of his glory that I part with earthly contentments to enjoy heavenly comforts Lord when thou lendest me thy staff of consolation I shall be well able to endure thy rod of affliction all though my body be worse I shall then find my soul to be much better my present condition happy my future blessed In what estate soever I am I will think that best because thou Lord hast put me there if my calling be low my account will be the less if I discharge this faithfully I shall not lose my reward Thou O Lord lookest not upon my greatness but my goodness my faithfulness in thy service A pin in thy materiall Temple was as usefull as a stone if I be any thing in thy spirituall it is enough yet let me not content my self with easiness and indifferency in heavenly blessings but labour to supply mine outward wants by inward graces so shall this earthly bitterness be turned into spirituall sweetness and eternall blessedness Thou O Lord hast alotted me my portion in this life most agreeable to thy Divine Wisdome most suitable to my frail condition and why take I then thought for to morrow sufficient unto the day is the evill thereof Thou allowest me lawfull means for increasing of it thou forbiddest me repining thoughts to distrust thee in it Lord let me first seek thy Kingdome and the righteousness thereof and then I know assuredly that all things needfull for me shall be added to me O thou blessed Saviour of the world who for my sake wert willing to endure the scornfull poverty of this life to purchase my redemption teach me by thine example and for thy sake to undervalue all the glorious pomps of these enticing vanities that though my body be despised by the world my sinfull soul may be accepted with thee and both soul and body may eternally be happy where thou art Lord by how much by thy great sufferings thou wert made the vilder for me by so much by thy rich mercy let thy love be ever dearer to me O give me graces suitable to all events let not prosperity puff me up nor adversity too much deject me but for thy mercy sake let happiness in Christ be all in all unto me make me humble in the one patient in the other thankfull in either bappy in both Grant Lord that no ungodly care or sinfull sorrow may disturb me but that I may with willingness and thankfulness and
joyfulness of heart contentedly rely upon thee Enrich my heart with heavenly thoughts give me that better part which cannot be taken from me Lord what thou deniest me of these outward comforts make good unto me by thine inward mercies that all these earthly things may work together to the best to mine advantage so shall my present poverty be an undoubted earnest of my future glory Amen CHAP. 34. Upon Sickness and ungodly repining thereat AS every good and perfect gift is from above so is allso every punishment for sin by every proportion of sorrow For misery cometh not out of the dust neither doth affliction spring out of the earth Iob 1.5 6. That Divine Goodness which wisely and affectionately disposeth all things to the good of his chosen by his holy providence hath suited their degrees limited their powers and appointed their ends every pain in sicknesse every pang in death have their just number weight and measure I't is the Lord let him doe what he will nothing can befall me but by his Divine allowance nothing shall dismay me that my God inflicteth on me if my visitation be grievous I am sure it is safe For He chastiseth me for my profit that I may be partaker of his holiness Blessed be that sorrow which allureth me from sin blessed be that misery that inviteth me to mercy 〈◊〉 kiss it I embrace it and with humbleness of heart I joyfully and patiently submit unto it The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh blessed be the name of the Lord Iob 1.21 I humbly confess Lord that my great and grievous sins have most justly deserved this great and grievous affliction that thou mightest long since have deprived me of my life for depriving thee of thine honour that I am most unworthy of this thy gentle visitation for I am full of rottenness and corruption and therefore can expect no other but to be fill'd with sorrow and affliction thou hast given me a body for thy service but I have defiled it with sin and wickedness thou gavest me a soul enriched with thy heavenly graces but I have defaced it with unthankfulness and disobedience no faculty of my soul no member of my body but are most impure and sinfull in thy sight Thou O Lord knowest all my foolishness and my faults are not hid from thee thou seest how vainly I have mis-spent my pretious time how carelesly abused that continued health which thou hast given me how seriously been busied on the Creature how wretchedly neglected thee the great Creatour Thou hast often weaned me from sin by thy blessed motions by thy gratious admonitions by thy gentle visitations by a wasted body and a wounded soul and yet I still sin without ceasing without sorrowing without repenting such are my faults so grievovs mine offences that I now blush to name those sins before thee by which I have so often and so foolishly rebell'd against thee and now after all this allthough thou hast with lasting patience waited my return and art inforced to withdraw thy present mercy yet thou art moved to behold my present misery evâ—n in thy very wrath thou hast compassion on me Habac. 3.2 while thou seemest by this present sickness to withhold thy favour from me thou gratiously intendest by this blessed means to shew thy self more lovingly unto me for I know Lord that thy judgements are just and that thou of very faithfulnesshast caused me to be troubled Psal 119.75 Theresore Though thou killest me yet will I trust in thee Iob 13.15 Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death yet will I fear no evill Psal 23.4 Behold Lord I am willingly and joyfully and thankfully in thy hands doe with me what thou wilt if I live I shall praise thee if I dye I trust I shall goe home unto thee and be for ever blessed with thee O thou Father of mercies and God of all consolations behold me thy sick servant with thine eye of pity and compassion O remember not my former sins but have mercy upon me O Lord and that soon for I am come unto great extremity O Lord my God I am troubled I am bowed down greatly I goe mourning all the day long thou writest bitter things against me and makest me possess the iniquities of my youth O let the sweetness of thy mercy qualifie the sharpness of thy Fatherly correction consider me O Lord that I am but dust full of frailties and infirmities forgive me for thy mercy sake Remember not the sinfull failings of my youth but according to the richness of thy goodness be thou mindfull of me O righteous Father look not on the multitude and hainousness of mine offences but look upon the bitter passion of thy blessed Son he was wounded for my transgressions he was broken for mine iniquities O by his blessed stripes let my sinfull soul be healed Enable me to suffer this thy gentle visitation with that meekness and contentedness of soul that becometh thy child and so bless it unto me that it may bring forth in me the quiet and the happy fruits of righteousness that it may drive my thoughts to immortality and fix my soul upon eternity Blessed Lord my hope is in thee my soul trusteth in thee and under the shadow of thy wings shall be my refuge untill this misery be overpast O Lord consider my complaint for I am brought very low Let my present anguish more prevail with thee to move thee to compassion than my former foolishness to stir thy wrath and indignation O enter not into judgement with thy servant for no flesh is righteous in thy sight Lord I confess my wickedness and am sorry for my sin for thy Names sake O Lord be mercifull unto my sin for it is great my confusion is daily before me and the shame of my face hath covered me my heart is disquieted within me and the fear of death is fallen upon me Lord I am thine O save me for thy mercy sake into thy hands I commend my self for thou hast redeemed me O Lord thou God of Truth Forsake me not O Lord my God be not thou far from me hast thee to help me O Lord God of my salvation O spare me for thy mercy sake that I may recover my strength before I goe hence and be no more seen Amen CHAP. 35. Upon the misery of Life and blessedness of Death I am a Pilgrim and a Stranger here as all my Fathers were I am wearied out with travell and long to be at rest I am lodged here but with great cost and greater danger this seeming sweetnesse hath cost me much true sorrow many bitter sighs and aking hearts disturbance of body distraction of soul I have sought for help here below but can find none no creature on earth to relieve me none to support me I have seen pleasure to be folly and laughter madness men of low degree to be vanity of high degree a lye their understanding vain their labours vain
their help much more vain for who can ransome the soul of his brother surely man must let that alone for ever My substance is a meer shadow and my rest unquietness I labour for holiness but I cannot attain it I search for happiness but I cannot find it the Devill beguiles me of it the World allures me from it yea so sad is my condition that mine own soul is against mine own contentment Mine understanding cosens me mine affections betray me my memory forsakes me those things which I would doe I cannot and I daily doe those things which I would not all that I am all that I can be in this life is nothing else but extreme vanity What shall I think of all this and wherewith shall I comfort me by thy mercy Lord I have found out one that can relieve me Thou O my blessed Saviour art unto me life and by thee death is unto me advantage while my body sleeps it shall rest and that rest shall be truly blessed I shall rest from labour from sorrow from sin my sleep shall be safe my vision happy while my body sleepeth my soul shall awake when my soul is uncloathed of flesh and my flesh of beauty my spirit shall be made ready with the robes of glory while my dust is insensible my spirit is intelligible mine eyes shall be then opened and I shall see even as I am seen with purity and perfection of soul no veil of nature shall obscure me no defect of organes hinder me no clouds of sin molest me mine understanding shall be clear mine affections pure my memory perfect I shall there be satisfied in beholding ravished in injoying blessed in reteining nothing can be there wanting where I enjoy all that was that is that is to come where the happy humanity is eternally united to the blessed deity where I am Christs and Christ is Gods O happy condition of my sinfull body O blessed change of my immortall soul the one is sowen in corruption that it may rise to immortality the other layeth down corruption to inher it glory though I now leave it I still long to enjoy it and joy exceedingly in longing for it because I know I shall for ever be united to it But wo is me even in this happiness I am still miserable I have found out my quiet but I care not to enjoy it death offers me a crown and I refuse to accept it am I so sensless to affect mine own unhappiness to rejoyce in labour and complain of rest what doe I here any longer the world loves me not nor I it why do I thus dote upon mine enemy when it frowns it afflicts me when it smiles it betrayes me there is nothing in it but weariness and misery Go out therefore O my soul go out cheerfully from thy prison to thy palace God is thy father and heaven thy country thou art here distressedly poor and wretchedly naked bereaved of graces dispoyled of goodness thou hast there much treasure and of great price a fair mansion and a goodly heritage Christ hath purchased it and is gone before to prepare it Thou longest much in this life to behold that which thou never sawest here are great and glorious things prepared for thee such as eye hath not seen ear hath not heard neither have entred into the heart of man to conceive how earnestly shouldst thou long to see them how much more earnestly to enjoy them how willingly should this make thee to express thy self with holy David and say My soul is athirst for God yea even for the living God when shall I come and appear before the presence of my God Alass my soul thou art here but groping in the dark daily erring and mistaking hourly stumbling and salling into sin into shame into sorrow in great danger of the miseries of life in greater of the torments of eternall death All that thou knowest here is to know thy self ignorant Thou onely knowest things here by their events thou shalt there know them in their first causes thou art here wearied out in gaining this imperfect lame and empty knowledge thou shalt there delight thy self in knowing all that is desirable by knowing him in whom are all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge these drops of transitory joyes are full of bitterness those rivers of eternall pleasures are derived from the fountain of eternall sweetness thou hast here vain pomp to delight thee thou hast there a far greater and more exceeding weight of glory to encompass thee thou art here enthralled by the misery of life thou art there inlarged by the blesedness of death Blessed Lord all this by grace I know and saithfully believe and yet by nature I am still blind and ignorant unable to discern unwilling to desire those blessed things which are belonging to mine everlasting peace but when thou in thy rich mercy shalt once open mine eyes to see the beauty of my heavenly home I shall then entirely love it and unfeignedly long for it I shall then most willingly forsake these tottering walls of my frail flesh to dwel with thee in pâ—rfect holiness and endless happiness that frailty may be swallowed up of immortality and immortality may be imbraced by eternity O thou which wert and art to come who hast sweetned death by thy perfect obedience and perfumed the grave by thy blessed sufferings suffer me not in my last hour for any pains of death or terrors of hell to fall from the fast hold of a true and lively faith in thy promises to lose the precious hopes of immortality and sweet enjoyments of eternity Lord let me then say with thy blessed Apostle That I know whom I have trusted that he will keep what I have delivered to him and restore it safely unto me at that day Let me seriously consider of the misery of life and blessedness of death acquaint me every day with the remembrance of it and bless me every hour with a desire unto it that I may willingly uncloath my self of sin and misery and joyfully be cloathed upon with immortalitie O Lord prepare me for that blessed hour and in my greatest weakness and extremity even then when all the comforts of this wretched life shall fail me Lord Jesus forsake me not be not thou far from me O give me then that inward joy that blessed comfort of thy holy Spirit that may support and comfort me in all the terrors and amazements of this dark and unknown passage in all the dreadfull accusations of the devill and mine own accusing conscience Lord let thy blessed Spirit then witness to my soul that I am thy child that thou wilt purge away all my dross and take away all my sins that I am powerfully protected by thy grace and shall assuredly be made partaker of thy glory Amen CHAP. 36. Upon the great Neglect of Opportunities in doing good unto the Saints Lord WHen I call to mind the richness and the largeness of thy bounty
towards me I am much grieved at the coldness and the carelesness of my affections towards thine each object of charity is an opportunity of mercy If I neglect it I am unkind to thee my Saviour cruel to my neigbour injurious to mine own soul I am not â—ord but Steward of thine outward blessings and it were now just with thee to call me to a strict account If any of thy Saints suffer which thou sendest unto me for relief their sufferings thou wilt surely require at my hands as each cup of cold water which I have given in thy name shall not lose its reward so each farthing which I ow unto thee in thy members will assuredly require its everlasting punishment I have been too carefully solicitous for the things of this life too caresly negligent of the treasures in that to come I have had many wayes to deprive my self of my present comfort of my future happiness when my talent hath been large I have had no leisure when little no ability to works of mercy The present necessities of thy Saints have been daily neglested upon the false pretence of future opportunities and those future opportunities again put off by the dilatory plea of mine own present necessities Thus have I long kept my self in a circulation of self-couzenage and have so lived here as if I were never to go hence and were utterly ignorant for what cause I came hither From whence is this my great neglect of charity towards my brethren but from my greater want of love to thee my God and from whence my disobedience to thy precepts but from mine unbelief of thy promises Thou biddest me Give and hast promised it shall be given unto me good measure shaken together pressed down and running over Luke 6.38 Thou commandest me not to be weary in well doing and hast promised that in due time I shall reap if I faint noâ— Ephes 6.9 If I did beleeve the one I should gladly perform the other and whose word shall I take Lord if I dare to question thine All thy blessed promises are Yea and Amen the begining sweet the end certain as thou hast a bottle for my tears and a bag for my transgressions so thou hast allso a book for mine Alms-deeds Acts 10.4 Not one of them shall be forgotten but even the very least of them shall be â—raciously accepted gloriously rewarded not for my work sake but for thy promise sake no for mine own sake but for my Saviours sake Lord I can merit nothing at thy hands but by thine own mercy And now Lord let me examine What I have gained by my want of charity I have exchanged Heaven to enjoy earth I have parted with thee my Saviour in whom are all the treasures that are true and crernall for the very basest part of earth which is vain and uncertain I have lost those blessed opportunities of doing good which can never be recalled and together with them those rewards of thine which shall never be enjoyed I have offended thee my God grieved thy Saints burdened mine own conscience and been an utter enemy to mine own salvation As my affections have been frozen towards others so have I justly found the gifts and graces of thy holy Spirit decaying daily in mine own soul my love cold to thy law mine ears deaf to thy precepts my mouth dumb to thy praises my faith dead to thy promises my hope fainting my zeal languishing my joy perishing These are the sad and sure effects of want of charity the beginning sinfull the progress dangerous the end desperate Lord if those heavenly spirits whose very names import their ardency of love to thy glory are yet found cold enough in thy sight with what horror and confusion of face will those wretched souls appear before thee who have not been so much as lukewarm in thy service By thy grace Lord I will therefore henceforth make a godly improvement of all future opportunities of doing good wharsoever thine allowance is unto me of these outward blessings I will dedicate some due proportion of it unto works of mercy and cheerfully and thankfully trust thee my God with the sustentation of my body upon whose blessed protection I safely relie for the eternall preservation of my soul my heart my hand my tongue mine actions shall be allwaies ready to relieve the necessities to promote the good of thy children and as this happy resolution hath had its beginning from thy grace so shall its aim be wholly at thy glory Blessed Lord Such is thy gratious goodnesse unto thine that thou even preventest them with thy blessings while they call upon thee thou art ready to answer and before they speak unto thee thou art willing to hear Lord I am thy child and am therefore bold to crave a blessing of thee and what is now more suitable to my necessities than the sweet infusion of thy holy Spirit for I now find to my grief of heart that the forein heat of the pleasures and profits of this life have extracted from me the inward heat of my desires and longings for thy blessed presence the adventitious heat of the love of this world hath quite consumed in me the naturall heat of my zeal to thy kingdom Lord kindle in me those decaying sparks of thy grace that they may now grow up into a bright flame of fervent affections to thy glory and thy childrens good Teach me to know that godlinesse is great gain and that the truest treasures are those which are layd up with thee in thy Kingdom Lord pardon my neglects of holy duties forgive my deadnesse and my dulnesse unto works of mercy repair my sinfull breaches by thy present graces O let the fervour of my future charity become a pleasing sacrifise to expiate my former misery to reconcile my soul in Christ to endless mercy Amen CHAP. 37. Upon the deceitfulness of the heart in the performance of holy duties NOthing is more common amongst Christians than to be deluded by the shew of holy actions the heart of man is deceitfull above all things who can know it holy performances are usually accompanied with hellish temptations when the Ship of our soules is under sail and hath the freshest way for heaven we have then most need to look to our steerage to have an eye to the compass and land-marks Which of our holy duties which are the ships we sayl in to the port of happiness have not their rocks to split upon or Remoraes to hinder them or cross winds to divert them or leaks to sink them or seas to overwhelm them when we arrive at any small measure of goodness we many times rest in it and grow secure upon it if grace carry us on farther we are too apt to beleeve that we are far better than our neighbours that we are highly in Gods favour and cannot but deserve his fatherly protection his liberall remuneration and so by this secret insinuation of pride in our hearts wee have
frailties commiserate his infirmities forgive his iniquities Lord purge him by thy pretious blood cloath him with thine own righteousnesse inrich him with thy blessed merits and plead them to thy Father for him O thou holy and for ever blessed Spirit who art the pure fountain of eternall love be present with him relieve and comfort him in all these bitter pangs of his last hour indue him with a willingnesse and cheerfulnesse to leave this transitory life and crown him with eternity of joyes in that to come And now O Lord we come unto thee for our selves who are here at this time upon our sinfull knees before thee Lord open our eyes that we may seriously consider of that last and solemn hour of our departure Lord sanctifie our hearts that while we are encompassed with sinfull flesh we may lament our often failings and infirmities and every day be more and more desirous to goe home to thee who art the God of spirits Lord give us grace that we may walk soberly and righteously and holily as becometh thy children that at the resurrection of the just our soules and bodies may enjoy the blessed consummation of their endlesse happinesse Lord hear our prayers and let our cries come unto thee for thy name sake for thy promise sake for thy blessed Sons sake Amen The Conclusion BLessed Lord God by whose onely mercy I have finished this imperfect Work as I began it by thy goodnesse so I desire to end it with thy praise Lord accept of it and graciously afford thy blessing to it Let not the weaknesse and the sinfulnesse of me the Instrument be the Readers discouragement but give glory and honour to thee the Agent for of thee and through thee and to thee are all things to thee be praise for ever Amen SOLI DEO GLORIA For the comfort and assistance of those that are ready to depart this life I have hereunto added the dying Confession of Mr. Anthâ—ny Sadler Minister of Gods Word at West-Thorock in Essex of which I was an Ear-witness Obiit vicesimo die Maii Anno 1643. THE Lord hath laid a gratious and a gentle visitation on me I doe acknowledge with a thankfull heart that this weakness of body this languishing of nature these painfull daies and nights are from him For misery cometh not out of the dust neither doth affliction spring out of the earth Job 5.6 Ah my friends little doe men think how much the great disturbances of sickness how much he pains and infirm ties of a dec ying body distract those blessed thoughts those sweet and happy meditations which the troubled soul desires The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak Lord Jesus strengthen the inward man and lay no more upon this sinfull bâ—dy than thou in mercy shalt enable it to bear I am now verily perswaded that God hath purposed to determine my daies his blessed will be done even so Lord Jesus come quickly He that looketh into his life past that ransaketh his soul and calleth to minde the sinfull failings of his youth will finde it very hard and difficult to make his calling and election sure I have earnestly desired to leave no corner of my soul unsearcht and I finde my self to be a very great and wretched sinner I have committed grievous sinnes very grievous sinnes such sinnes as are not fit to be named before God's Saints I have examined my soul by each particular Commandment and I finde my self guilty of the breach of all and that in an high manner especially considering that weighty Function God's providence hath called me unto I have not onely sinned against mine own soul but against the soules of others too whom I have corrupted by my ill example and that very often And now when I look upon the glasse of the Law and there see mine owne vildnesse I finde Gods justice and mine own deserts even ready to surprise and cast me down into the nethermost hell and that most righteously But O see the goodnesse of a gratious God! I now come to lay hold upon the promises but how not without repentance not presumingly I apply them not in a generall but particular way I doe not onely believe that Christ Jesus came iâ— to the World to save sinners but I believe allso that he died for my sinnes and rose again for my justification God hath promised and all his promises are Yea and Amen that he will not forsake those which trust in him nay he hath bound himself unto it by an oath by two immutable things which cannot fail his Truth and his Holinesse Heb. 6.18 and God hath said That he which confesseth and forsaketh his sinnes shall finde mercy 1 Joh. 1.9 I acknowledge them I confesse them I am grieved for them I forsake them I abhorre themwhat should I doe more God requireth not more of me These pauses were supplied with tears and yet for all this I cannot find my self assured of his favour methinkes this sorrow is not so hearty as it ought to be and yet I know and stedfastly believe that if God did not work with me this sorrow could not be and where he worketh there can be nothing wanting I know that the most righteous man alive cannot perform this work so perfectly as he ought and therefore I believe that he which is ascended up on high hath done it for me in that full and ample manner which is able to appease his Father's wrath and I now trust that by his perfect obedience this imperfect worke of mine shall find a gratious acceptation This is my hope and this my beliefe Nay I can goe yet a little further to strengthen my assurance that my peace is made with God I every day and every houre doe pray unto my Saviour to intercede his Father for me and if I implore him he will intercede his Father and if he intercede his Father he cannot be denied O my God impute my sinnes to him transferre his righteousnesse to me and then I know I shall appear a glorious soul before thee Amen FINIS THE CONTENTS CHAP. 1. UPon the sinfulnesse of our thoughts touching the sacred Deity with holy cautions to order our devotions aright pag. 2. CHAP. 2. Upon the consideration of God's love and man's unthankfulnesse A Meditation suited to the morning pag. 9 CHAP. 3. Upon the consideration of Divine Providence A Meditation for noon pag. 14 CHAP. 4. Upon the consideration of the sinfulnesse shortnesse and uncertainâ—y of life A Meditation suited to the evening pag. 17 CHAP. 5. Upon our approaching unto God's House with necessary cautions for our behaviour there pag. 20 CHAP. 6. Upon our returning from God's House and the neglect of private duties pag. 24 CHAP. 7. Upon the want of due preparation for Receiving of the Lord's Supper pag. 27 CHAP. 8. Containing pious Ejaculations at the time of Receiving pag. 30 CHAP. 9. Containing a brief Meditation and pious Thanksgiving after our Receiving pag. 31 CHAP. 10. Upon a Journey undertaken and the many dangers incident thereunto pag. 32 CHAP. 11. Containing pious Meditations and zealous Ejaculations after a Journey pag. 34 CHAP. 12. Upon the great danger of Security pag. 37 CHAP. 13. Upon the great danger of Prosumption pag. 41 CHAP. 14. Upon quenching of the motions of God's holy Spirit pag. 47 CHAP. 15. Upon the consideration of God's peculiar Providence to his Children pag. 51 CHAP. 16. Upon sinfull Anger and the great disturbance thereof pag. 55 CHAP. 17. Upon Man's inordinate love to the Creature pag. 58 CHAP. 18. Upon the sin of Uncleaness with Incouragements to avoid it pag. 63 CHAP. 19. Upon immoderate Mirth and the great Inconveniencies thereof pag. 67 CHAP. 20. Upon the great danger of deferring the hour of Repentance pag. 75 CHAP. 21. Upon Servile Fear and the danger thereof pag. 79 CHAP. 22. Upon the great neglect of reckoning daily with our Thoughts and the benefits lost thereby pag. 84 CHAP. 23. Upon Unchristian-like Dulnesse in Affliction pag. 87 CHAP. 24. Upon uncheerfulnesse in Christianitie with Incouragements to avoyd it pag. 91 CHAP. 25. Upon mans sinfull frailty in the hour of Temptation with Motives to make resistance pag. 94 CHAP. 26. Upon the Infirmitie of the Saints pag. 97 CHAP. 27. Upon Desertion pag. 101 CHAP. 28. Upon sudden danger pag. 106 CHAP. 29. Upon the weaknesse of Faith and sinfulnesse of Thoughts tending to Despair pag. 107 CHAP. 30. Upon the great Neglect of the duty of Prayer pag. 111 CHAP. 31. Upon the great neglect of Reading the sacred Scriptures pag. 114 CHAP. 32. Upon the neglect of Divine Meditation pag. 117 CHAP. 33. Upon Unchristian-like Dejectedness in Poverty pag. 119 CHAP. 34. Upon Sickness and ungodly repining thereat pag. 122 CHAP. 35. Upon the misery of Life and blessednesse of Death pag. 126 CHAP. 36. Upon the great neglect of opportunities in doing good to the Saints pag. 131 CHAP. 37. Upon the deceitfulnesse of the heart in the performance of holy duties pag. 135 CHAP. 38. Upon the unrulinesse of the Tongue with necessary cautions to restrain it pag. 140 CHAP. 39. Upon holy revenge for sin with motives and incouragements thereunto pag. 144 CHAP. 40. Upon the blessed condition of the Saints with motives and encouragements unto Godlinesse pag. 147 A comfortable Prayer to be used at the point of Death by the Visitors of the Sick pag. 157 FINIS