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his_o return_n of_o such_o prayer_n be_v great_o defer_v and_o as_o a_o condescend_v help_n to_o prevent_v despond_v anxiety_n quiet_a of_o mind_n concern_v the_o return_n to_o be_v defer_v always_o accompany_v my_o supplication_n and_o the_o lord_n leave_v i_o not_o to_o the_o dominion_n of_o corrupt_a nature_n or_o of_o satan_n suggestion_n or_o if_o either_o have_v assault_v i_o the_o divine_a strength_n raise_v i_o to_o a_o actual_a resignation_n to_o his_o will_n at_o the_o time_n fortify_v i_o against_o they_o again_o a_o observe_v christian_n see_v so_o much_o of_o the_o depth_n of_o wisdom_n in_o god_n way_n concern_v they_o that_o it_o must_v be_v strange_a if_o he_o presume_v to_o confine_v god_n to_o one_o method_n when_o the_o variousness_n yea_o the_o contrariness_n of_o method_n to_o bring_v about_o the_o same_o end_n be_v one_o great_a evidence_n of_o the_o excellency_n of_o his_o wisdom_n a_o observe_a believer_n know_v that_o god_n try_v the_o strength_n of_o 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of_o this_o trust_n psal_n 37.5_o commit_v thy_o way_n unto_o the_o lord_n and_o he_o shall_v bring_v it_o to_o pass_v the_o habit_n of_o resignation_n may_v be_v in_o the_o soul_n but_o it_o be_v draw_v forth_o into_o exercise_n by_o the_o renew_a influence_n of_o the_o spirit_n three_o you_o may_v judge_v of_o the_o intercession_n of_o christ_n spirit_n in_o your_o soul_n in_o address_v god_n by_o prayer_n by_o the_o passage_n of_o providence_n that_o bring_v about_o the_o return_n of_o this_o prayer_n in_o the_o observation_n whereof_o the_o speciality_n of_o a_o divine_a hand_n in_o the_o providence_n bring_v the_o return_n about_o be_v as_o discoverable_a as_o immediateness_n of_o a_o divine_a spirit_n influence_v the_o soul_n to_o ask_v with_o calm_a and_o resign_v submission_n as_o to_o the_o event_n the_o observe_a christian_n do_v often_o see_v these_o two_o join_v together_o and_o each_o illustrate_v one_o another_o where_o other_o do_v not_o or_o hardly_o be_v at_o the_o 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you_o meet_v with_o therein_o and_o the_o strength_n you_o have_v to_o resist_v they_o and_o that_o in_o answer_n to_o your_o ejaculatory_a prayer_n 3._o reflect_v upon_o the_o issue_n whether_o it_o be_v freedom_n from_o be_v overcome_v by_o its_o temptation_n and_o that_o in_o return_n to_o ejaculate_v thought_n for_o divine_a strength_n to_o preserve_v you_o before_o entrance_n in_o it_o or_o at_o the_o time_n you_o be_v engage_v with_o it_o the_o improvement_n of_o which_o reflection_n must_v needs_o be_v a_o resolution_n to_o enter_v no_o society_n but_o when_o under_o the_o constraint_n of_o lawful_a business_n or_o recreation_n and_o even_o then_o with_o a_o eye_n to_o god_n in_o the_o use_n of_o ejaculatory_a prayer_n either_o aforehand_o or_o while_n in_o conversation_n for_o strength_n to_o resist_v temptation_n that_o may_v either_o endanger_v occasion_n to_o sin_n or_o of_o lose_v a_o spiritual_a frame_n four_o reflect_v upon_o the_o failure_n of_o the_o day_n and_o what_o 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principal_a object_n be_v not_o so_o much_o esau_n reconciliation_n to_o he_o as_o the_o favour_n and_o hand_n of_o god_n in_o bring_v it_o about_o this_o raise_v his_o spirit_n to_o such_o a_o exclamation_n such_o a_o sight_n of_o god_n in_o the_o go_v forth_o of_o his_o divine_a providence_n necessary_o suppose_v its_o observation_n be_v it_o therefore_o possible_a to_o observe_v mean_n probable_a of_o bring_v forth_o such_o design_n but_o make_v unsuccessful_a the_o contrivance_n of_o the_o wise_a bring_v to_o other_o end_n than_o they_o purpose_v the_o evil_a craftiness_n of_o other_o to_o their_o dishonour_n and_o ruin_n when_o design_v for_o their_o honour_n and_o preferment_n yea_o mean_n in_o appearance_n tend_v to_o hurt_v bring_v forth_o great_a good_a be_v it_o possible_a i_o say_v to_o observe_v these_o thing_n and_o not_o to_o discover_v another_o power_n above_o human_a policy_n to_o contrive_v or_o human_a strength_n to_o effectuate_v even_o the_o sovereign_a power_n 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this_o account_n of_o myself_o under_o no_o other_o power_n of_o christianity_n than_o the_o effect_n of_o religious_a education_n one_o bear_v within_o the_o pale_a of_o the_o church_n instruct_v in_o the_o knowledge_n of_o the_o true_a principle_n of_o the_o christian_a religion_n and_o enable_v to_o discourse_v of_o they_o with_o the_o character_n of_o know_v the_o thing_n of_o god_n though_o but_o notional_o then_o train_v up_o with_o the_o continue_a example_n of_o perform_v all_o the_o duty_n of_o hear_v read_v and_o pray_v with_o that_o powerful_a influence_n that_o public_a or_o private_a devotion_n be_v seldom_o neglect_v but_o not_o diligent_a and_o serious_a in_o the_o perusal_n of_o the_o scripture_n beside_o all_o this_o under_o the_o advantage_n of_o religious_a conversation_n and_o holy_a practice_n be_v so_o powerful_o impress_v that_o in_o the_o course_n of_o my_o life_n never_o one_o single_a act_n of_o the_o common_a vice_n of_o drink_v swear_v or_o uncleanness_n taint_v my_o conversation_n yea_o the_o impression_n continue_v so_o strong_a as_o after_o my_o departure_n from_o under_o this_o strictness_n of_o instruction_n and_o example_n still_o the_o same_o exactness_n in_o duty_n and_o conversation_n remain_v though_o youthful_a temptation_n surround_v i_o god_n restrain_v grace_n be_v my_o preservative_n and_o my_o natural_a desire_n to_o be_v in_o business_n be_v a_o mean_n of_o prevent_v the_o impression_n of_o temptation_n yet_o still_o i_o be_v in_o the_o dark_a as_o to_o the_o save_a knowledge_n of_o true_a christianity_n or_o the_o inward_a power_n of_o grace_n sensible_o act_v in_o the_o soul_n my_o natural_a disposition_n incline_v i_o more_o to_o observation_n than_o to_o much_o talk_n in_o conversation_n lead_v i_o not_o only_o to_o observe_v the_o discourse_n and_o action_n of_o other_o but_o even_o to_o remark_n the_o event_n attend_v my_o life_n with_o reflection_n thereupon_o without_o any_o regard_n to_o it_o as_o duty_n or_o productive_a of_o the_o
powerful_o to_o pray_v for_o strength_n to_o resist_v the_o temptation_n of_o reproach_v other_o either_o through_o the_o natural_a tendency_n thereto_o the_o common_a example_n of_o other_o or_o out_o of_o the_o tempting-design_n of_o self-applause_n in_o the_o disparagement_n of_o other_o and_o answerable_a hereto_o marvellous_a strength_n of_o christ_n spirit_n be_v afford_v i_o with_o special_a providence_n discover_v this_o spiritual_a strength_n accompany_v with_o the_o bear_n home_o upon_o my_o thought_n that_o of_o st._n matthew_n chap._n 7._o ver_fw-la 12._o all_o thing_n whatsoever_o you_o will_v that_o man_n shall_v do_v unto_o you_o do_v you_o even_o so_o with_o they_o that_o then_o i_o can_v not_o but_o observe_v myself_o against_o my_o own_o corrupt_a inclination_n and_o other_o example_n preserve_v from_o this_o too_o natural_a and_o common_a vice_n even_o of_o lazy_a and_o profess_v christian_n who_o by_o the_o actual_a remembrance_n of_o this_o very_a passage_n may_v be_v a_o excellent_a mean_n to_o preserve_v they_o from_o the_o malignant_a infection_n of_o reproach_v other_o five_o i_o experience_v a_o wonderful_a strength_n to_o pray_v for_o a_o continue_a sense_n of_o god_n all-seeing_a eye_n as_o well_o in_o conversation_n as_o in_o the_o performance_n of_o religious_a duty_n suitable_a to_o which_o not_o only_o awful_a thought_n of_o his_o majesty_n approach_v in_o duty_n prevent_v distraction_n therein_o seize_v i_o but_o even_o a_o powerful_a awe_n of_o god_n affect_v i_o in_o common_a and_o private_a action_n always_o consider_v any_o circumstance_n in_o the_o action_n as_o may_v destroy_v god_n accept_v thereof_o especial_o as_o to_o act_n of_o charity_n wherein_o i_o have_v find_v such_o a_o watch_n over_o myself_o as_o i_o can_v not_o have_v be_v satisfy_v without_o strict_a enquiry_n whether_o unwillingliness_n be_v not_o in_o the_o action_n whether_o some_o desire_n of_o applause_n or_o only_a pity_n and_o natural_a tenderness_n be_v not_o the_o motive_n of_o this_o charitable_a action_n and_o nothing_o then_o have_v be_v more_o please_a than_o to_o find_v that_o a_o willingliness_n to_o obey_v god_n command_n on_o purpose_n to_o please_v he_o in_o the_o compassionate_a relief_n of_o other_o a_o cheerfulness_n without_o the_o least_o intermixture_n of_o reluctancy_n a_o sincerity_n without_o the_o least_o desire_n of_o its_o be_v know_v be_v the_o ingredient_n of_o the_o duty_n i_o desire_v to_o witness_v the_o difficulty_n of_o thus_o perform_v action_n without_o great_a and_o actual_a influence_n of_o strength_n from_o above_o the_o reception_n whereof_o be_v often_o obtain_v by_o that_o bless_a mean_n of_o solemn_a or_o ejaculatory_a prayer_n wherein_o the_o spirit_n of_o christ_n intercede_v for_o his_o people_n the_o same_o spirit_n of_o prayer_n impress_v upon_o i_o a_o sense_n of_o god_n all-seeing_a eye_n and_o that_o scripture_n be_v continual_o in_o my_o thought_n of_o do_v all_o thing_n as_o unto_o the_o lord_n the_o constant_a remembrance_n whereof_o i_o have_v find_v great_o advance_v that_o gospel-perfection_n of_o a_o unfeigned_a sincerity_n both_o in_o converse_n with_o god_n in_o holy_a duty_n and_o with_o one_o another_o in_o common_a action_n and_o discourse_n six_o i_o can_v tell_v you_o that_o at_o another_o time_n i_o have_v be_v powerful_o help_v to_o petition_v for_o the_o exercise_n of_o love_n to_o god_n and_o answerable_a to_o this_o i_o have_v be_v help_v in_o prayer_n and_o in_o worldly_a business_n to_o draw_v forth_o kindler_n of_o love_n to_o god_n from_o all_o sensible_a circumstance_n of_o myself_o and_o other_o even_o from_o the_o poor_a in_o the_o street_n both_o as_o to_o their_o poverty_n and_o imperfection_n of_o body_n bless_v the_o lord_n with_o sweet_a exercise_n of_o love_n to_o he_o yea_o this_o grace_n of_o love_n to_o god_n have_v be_v excite_v from_o the_o observation_n of_o fullness_n and_o prosperity_n in_o some_o but_o with_o great_a emptiness_n of_o the_o inward_a comfort_n of_o the_o experience_a christian_n soul_n for_o sensual_a pleasure_n divert_v their_o thought_n from_o the_o observation_n and_o enjoyment_n of_o what_o be_v much_o more_o to_o be_v value_v in_o their_o nature_n and_o last_v in_o their_o duration_n at_o this_o very_a time_n happen_v to_o be_v alone_o in_o a_o coach_n remark_v such_o kindler_n of_o love_n from_o circumstance_n of_o other_o appear_v in_o the_o street_n sudden_o and_o strong_o this_o suggestion_n force_v itself_o upon_o my_o mind_n how_o be_v it_o that_o god_n do_v show_v such_o special_a favour_n to_o i_o beyond_o other_o yea_o to_o make_v i_o differ_v so_o much_o from_o myself_o in_o former_a time_n with_o amaze_a thought_n of_o the_o change_n upon_o my_o soul_n and_o immediate_o that_o scripture_n overawe_v i_o from_o corrupt_a rational_a argue_v or_o from_o satan_n darken_v or_o deviate_v i_o from_o right_a conception_n of_o god_n and_o his_o way_n i_o will_v have_v mercy_n on_o who_o i_o will_v have_v mercy_n i_o will_v have_v compassion_n on_o who_o i_o will_v have_v compassion_n from_o whence_o happen_v such_o quiet_a of_o mind_n as_o have_v by_o the_o blessing_n of_o god_n still_v my_o thought_n perfect_o as_o to_o that_o great_a point_n of_o election_n which_o be_v the_o great_a effect_n of_o free_a unmerited_a mercy_n and_o in_o the_o use_n of_o mean_n bring_v the_o child_n of_o mercy_n safe_o to_o salvation_n this_o warm_o excite_v my_o love_n to_o god_n have_v a_o evidence_n of_o my_o share_n in_o his_o elect_v mercy_n by_o the_o inseparable_a effect_n of_o it_o the_o work_n of_o grace_n begin_v in_o i_o and_o prepare_v i_o for_o the_o heavenly_a glory_n a_o seven_o experience_n be_v when_o altogether_o insensible_a of_o the_o growth_n of_o faith_n and_o when_o the_o lord_n by_o a_o marvellous_a method_n be_v to_o establish_v it_o in_o my_o soul_n even_o than_o i_o observe_v for_o some_o considerable_a time_n that_o i_o be_v carry_v out_o in_o prayer_n and_o meditation_n with_o zealous_a affection_n that_o the_o lord_n will_v turn_v my_o eye_n and_o trust_v from_o sensible_a thing_n to_o a_o trust_n and_o reliance_n upon_o god_n himself_o as_o to_o all_o outward_a thing_n and_o as_o to_o the_o inward_a advancement_n of_o holiness_n as_o a_o mean_a tend_v to_o future_a salvation_n answerable_a to_o which_o god_n have_v discover_v himself_o marvellous_o in_o the_o step_n of_o outward_a providential_a dispensation_n and_o by_o the_o inward_a work_n of_o his_o spirit_n as_o mean_n of_o sound_v and_o establish_v this_o grace_n of_o reliance_n in_o my_o soul_n which_o i_o hope_v shall_v be_v increase_v in_o the_o use_n of_o mean_n till_o faith_n obtain_v its_o perfect_a end_n the_o fruition_n of_o god_n in_o glory_n and_o though_o i_o hope_v i_o may_v say_v in_o humility_n that_o my_o soul_n be_v raise_v above_o sensible_a thing_n to_o look_v to_o thing_n unseen_a and_o to_o set_v my_o esteem_n and_o reliance_n with_o comfort_n and_o satisfaction_n upon_o they_o independent_o upon_o worldly_a thing_n yet_o i_o be_o ashamed_a for_o the_o small_a growth_n of_o reliance_n in_o i_o and_o that_o great_a improvement_n therein_o have_v not_o be_v the_o fruit_n of_o the_o infinite_o wise_a and_o condescend_v method_n of_o god_n goodness_n in_o train_v i_o to_o live_v by_o faith_n in_o his_o promise_n and_o perfection_n experience_n of_o god_n method_n in_o train_v i_o to_o the_o first_o sense_n of_o reliance_n with_o its_o further_a establishment_n and_o growth_n and_o that_o exact_o as_o they_o be_v set_v down_o in_o record_n in_o my_o diary_n the_o first_o experience_n lead_v i_o to_o observe_v god_n follow_v method_n with_o i_o be_v that_o of_o carry_v i_o forth_o in_o prayer_n to_o petition_v establishment_n of_o faith_n in_o my_o soul_n which_o begin_v most_o remarkable_o after_o a_o fit_a of_o sickness_n and_o have_v continue_v to_o be_v upon_o my_o mind_n in_o all_o my_o suit_n great_a or_o lesser_a since_o that_o and_o i_o hope_v will_v continue_v to_o the_o end_n of_o my_o militant_a warfare_n a_o second_o experience_n lead_v i_o to_o reliance_n upon_o god_n be_v by_o remove_v all_o dependence_n from_o these_o outward_a fabulous_a passage_n reckon_v as_o ominous_a of_o such_o and_o such_o certain_a event_n which_o undoubted_o be_v at_o first_o the_o effect_n of_o ignorance_n of_o the_o true_a god_n among_o the_o heathen_a world_n who_o notwithstanding_o the_o discovery_n of_o god_n in_o his_o nature_n and_o providence_n by_o visible_a thing_n the_o effect_n of_o his_o power_n yet_o natural_a thing_n keep_v first_o in_o their_o view_n and_o have_v the_o preeminency_n of_o god_n in_o their_o mind_n and_o heart_n and_o though_o we_o enjoy_v the_o discovery_n of_o god_n in_o his_o word_n and_o providence_n so_o plain_o yet_o how_o do_v we_o retain_v the_o example_n in_o reduce_v those_o thing_n to_o natural_a cause_n that_o be_v to_o be_v apply_v
i_o do_v much_o wonder_n at_o their_o prize_v the_o comfort_n of_o this_o earth_n count_v all_o thing_n else_o as_o nothing_o or_o imaginary_a never_o have_v experience_v the_o reality_n of_o spiritual_a thing_n and_o no_o wonder_n therefore_o they_o dip_v themselves_o as_o much_o as_o possible_a in_o these_o thing_n that_o afford_v present_a sensual_a and_o vanish_v comfort_n rather_o than_o by_o a_o serious_a application_n of_o themselves_o to_o god_n in_o the_o use_n of_o divine_a ordinance_n which_o while_o they_o be_v unregenerate_a can_v afford_v no_o solid_a ravish_a comfort_n they_o be_v as_o i_o be_v while_o only_o under_o the_o power_n of_o education_n nicodemus-like_a amaze_v at_o the_o literal_a meaning_n how_o christian_n can_v talk_v with_o god_n and_o enjoy_v communion_n with_o a_o invisible_a god_n it_o be_v impossible_a by_o the_o great_a reach_n of_o the_o most_o ingenious_a fancy_n to_o apprehend_v the_o state_n of_o the_o soul_n with_o its_o ravish_a sweetness_n 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