the ymage similitude of his maker But when he perceaued that it was not cōuenient nor mete y t he should liue alone a helpe like vnto him selfe was geuen him and taken euen oute of hys owne side insomuche that Adam is to Eue as the father is vnto his sonne And it was said to Eue thou shalte be vnder the power of man he shall rule thee Nor it is not thus only in man but in al kindes sortes of beastes y t the female is vnder the power dominion of the male and therefore the male is more stronger bothe in mind bodye then the female And the instrumentes to rule withall are more excellente and more perfecte in manne then in womanne as the sharpenes of witte diligence wisedome strength audacitie generositie and y t excellencie of the minde And therfore y t Romaynes folowing nature did neuer take the whole auctoritie of man from women Liuius vsinge y e wordes of Cato dothe saye thus Our forefathers would not that women shoulde do anye thing without the auctoritye of man submittinge them selues to their fathers to theyr brothers to their husbandes Matrimonye is called a coniunction and a cōparison but yet they are not like as Martial doth saye merelye except the woman be vnlike the man O Sexte sayth Martial let the woman be vnder her husband and so they shalbe lyke It is sufficient y t the husband loue his wife with a sightiye loue but the wife is bounde vnto her husband in two thin ges that is to loue him to do him reuerence the whiche affections can not be constray ned but yet they maye be obned of her by gentlenes But this thing can not be done w t woordes but as he sayeth Marke yf thou wilt be loued loue They which are learned do think that this thing doth not happen by chaūce medle but by the secrete artifice of the world The Philosopher Plato doth say that the whole worlde is so compacte and bounde together by God the artificer as it were with certayne knottes for yf thou drawe or take one of them the other by a certayne secrete coniunction as it were the lynckes of a cheyne do folowe but yet he sayeth that those thinges which are like most cōformable one to the other are most speciallye ioyned together that beneuolence doth grow of the similitude likenes of nature and custome and that they which loue are loued agayne And this loue must be pure and sin cere or elles it shall haue no strength nor none effect Fire paynted vpon a wal doth not burne nor a false adamante draweth no yron Many men do maruayl why they are not loued seinge they do shewe so many tokēs signes of loue The signes tokens of loue are not loue therefore they cause not the effecte of loue but prouoke cause hatred when it is perceaued y t they loued not but fained so many tokens and diuerse signes of loue Loue also doth growe of the opinion of honestie for as Cicero dothe saye there is nothinge more amiable nor y t draweth the minde of manne more to loue then vertue All loue is a certayn affection to y t thing that is goodly fayre there is nothing more goodly then vertue the which yf a man might behold see with his bodely eyes would stirre vp great loue vnto it self but it is seene with the inwarde eye of the mind and draweth those that beholdeth it to beneuolence to embrace and loue it The opinion of excellencie the whiche is situate set other in the power of the body or of y u soule doth bring forth ingender veneration and reuerence Strength riches frendes clientes seruauntes ministers subiectes fauour grace and dignitie be longe vnto the bodye In the soule are iudgement wisdom the sharpenes of witte sagacitie watche fortitude audacitie wherby men do take vpon them great actes enterprises Of these thinges doth maiestie procede arise by the which al thinges vpon earthe are ruled gouerned And with this kinges and magistrates gouerne and defende great nations and king domes and throughe thys greate multitudes and number of people do obeye vnto the will of one alone wyth this captaynes Emperors do conducte whether soeuer they wil greate companies hostes of menne Of this the mayster hathe neade for hys seruaunte the father for hys sonne and the husbande for hys wife to thende she maye loue and obeye hym that is wise for prudeneye and wisdome wythoute honestie and goodnesse is formidable and goodnes without wisdom is loued but not obeied In this maiestie doth consist the force strength of iustice both to re ward to punishe It shalbe sufficiēt for an husbād to haue of these thinges so muche as shal suffice to rule his wife his family withall Other mē haue nede of power also of maiestie to rule a citie in the which are so manye houses housholdes The foundation of al thinges is fayth y e which is most certaynly obtayned gotten by science The nexte vnto fayth is to be hadde in good estimation Marcus Cato as Salust doeth write dyd laboure rather to be good then to appeare good therfore the lesse he sought for glo rye the more he obtayned it Those opinions are wont to be most surest and fast y t which do occupye the yong tender minde as we do see by those thinges that children do first learne and commende to memorye Nor wolle doth neuer loose hys firste coloure nor that clothe the which as it is commonlye spoken is died in wolle And therfore we ought not only to labour and studye to brynge in good affections but we muste so dispose and order the whole state of oure lyfe that it maye be the more easie to be borne and throughe conuersation waxe more swete and pleasaunte Thou muste also consider thyne owne wytte and qualities and lykewyse thy wyues and thy ryches and substaunce and prouide that it maye prosper not onely for the tyme and state presente but also for the tyme that is to come And thus considerynge the casualties of man thou muste dispose the thyng in suche wyse that not great chaūge or chaūce mai trouble the soft delitate mind of the woman notwithstandynge that chaunces are infinite that no prouision can be foūd to withstande them and that many of them must be referd vnto God the whiche taketh care for vs al wuld that we shoulde not care for the thinges that are to come the whi che pertayne to hym onelye nor no man can make prouision agaynst them But now to retourne to oure purpose when thou goest a wowyng thou muste beware and take heede that thou whether the woman be promysed the or nowe brought home vnto the geue not thy self to those vnmete voluptuous loue lustes by the whiche men are compelled to sai to do
iudged and then embraced y t thinge with loue or with hatred auoyded the same the whiche yf man ought to do in choosynge of frendes howe much more diligently ought it to be done in the choyse of a wife the principal of al amitie and frendshippe whose name among al other in beneuolēce and loue is most dearest Epictetus a philosopher of y e secte of Stoickes doth saye that euery thing hath his eare so that yf thou take holde there at thou mayst vse it most hādsomely cōmodiously True wisdome is to knowe the nature of euery thinge and the vse therof Yf thou whē thou takest a wife wouldest thynk vpon thy children and howe thou mayeste liue with thy wife thou canste not lightlye fayle in the choyse of her the whiche as Zcnophon dothe write in his Economica maketh very much for the felicitie or misery of mā For how much y e more a thinge is vnited knit vnto man so much the more it may helpe him yf it be good or hynder him yf it be euill Those dāmages hurtes which are inwardly in y e body are worse thē those which are without those of y e soule then those of y e body likewise menne do iudge of those thinges which are called good But peraduēture it shall appeare vnto some that these thinges are not vniuersally true for vnto some the losse of their goodes is more thē y e losse of their helth But this thing doeth not arise or happen of the treasure or moneye it selfe but because they perswade vnto them selues y t to loose theyr treasure is a thing intolerable therfore the goodes are not of more estimation then is helth but thaffection doth rule in thys thing And therfore it semeth lesse to some to be dreuen out of his kingdom then to other some to loose a small portion of his patrimony Some wil reuēge a word most cruelly and some other wel buffeted and beaten wil not reuēge it at al. All these thinges do pro cede come of y e soule y e whiche as most inwardly loyned knit vnto man hath more power in him then the bodye yea as Plato thinketh then man him selfe If it be then of so great importaunce what maner of frende thou haue to liue cōmodiously or ineōmodi ously withal the whiche shall none otherwise dwell nor be in the selfe same chāber bed nor house with the but that thou mayest shake him of at thy pleasure how much more then oughteste thou to take hede when thou choosest thee a wife the which must cōtinually be conuersaunt with the at thy table in thy chamber in bed in thy secretes and finally in thy heart and breste If thou go from home thou dost cōmit thy house thy fami lie thy goodes and thy chyldren of all other thinges the most pleasaunt vnto her she is the last that leaueth the at thy departing the first that receaueth thee at thy returnynge thou departest frō her with swete embracementes kisses and with swete kysses and embracemētes she receaueth thee vnto her thou disclosest thy ioye and heauines It is an heauenlye lyfe to be conuersaunte in companye with those that a man delyteth in and loueth But it is a calamitie infernal to be streyghted to se those thinges y t a man doth hate or to be in cōpanye with those that a man woulde not be withall and yet can not be separated nor depart from them Of this co meth as we do see in dinerse mariages so greate ruine so facinorous and filthy dedes maymes murders committed by such desperate per sons as they are loth to kepe yet can not lawfully refuse nor leaue thē Therfore in ma riage there are two wayes y e one leadeth a mā to miserye the other to felicitie In the beginning of these thou must diligently deliberate cōsult with thy selfe as Prodigus the Sophist doth saye in the first booke of Zeniphons cōmentaris y t he caused Hercules to take auysmēt whether he shuld folow vice or vertue And in asmuche as it is a matter of great weyght importaūce let it not be greuous vnto y t reader to reade it for it shall not greue me to declare open the thing more copiously clerely And seing y t electiō or choyse is nothinge els but to take a thing mete cōuenient to the ende it is prepared for therfore euery one y t must choose ought to regard the end know what thinge is cōuenient for it It is nede ful also y t he be prudente and wise for els he cānot dispose it nor perceaue what is cōmo dious mete for y t end Nor wisdom is not obtayned nor gottē but by the knowledge vse experiēce of thinges not by folowing of y e affectiōs the which do diminish mans iudgemēt Ignoraūce the troublesōnes of the mind is y e very cause y t yongmen iudge not thinges so wel as old mē do they knowe not the businesse of mans lyfe and beyng but new and rawe in al thinges they are sone deceaued stird with affections theyr mindes by so obfuscate and cloudye that they can not see what is right nor how thinges ought to be done and ordred Therfore the yonge mā shuld leaue the care of this electiō to his parentes y t whiche haue better iudgement are more free from the agitations and motions of al affections then they are And inasmuche as they do loue their childrē excedingly they wold that their children shoulde be none otherwise coūseled thē thēselues for the father as it nath bene sundry times by manye examples declared doth in a maner loue his childe more then he loueth hym selfe The yonge man muste take hede that folowyng the light iudgement of his owne affection mind he chaunge not a short delectation plea sure into a continuall repentaūce We do learne by great continuall vse experience of thinges y t the secrete contractes of matrimonye made betwene those that be yong are seldom fortunate lucky and feawe to be vnlucky that are made and stablished by their frendes and parentes Al the old mariages of the Ie wes and gentiles were made after this forme and maner The parētes by theyr owne aucthoritye did intreate and finishe vp the matter among them selues nor it was not lawful for their childrē to dissent or to go backe frō y e thing y t their parentes had accōplished and done And yet they are to be admonished to haue an eye and a diligent regard 〈◊〉 marying of their children y t it may be to their great qui etnes and that they asmuch as may be possible may lyue in iocunditye and pleasure They muste not haue before their eyes these vayne foolishe honours nor the enuious and vnsure power nor y e vnquiete factions nor riches the which vnto olde men are wont to be moste
equinalled wyth all worldlye ryches How magnificente a thynge is it to be taken for good and faythfull in another mans house as it is written of Crates Thebanus vnto whome for his singuler goodnesse and loue that he bare vnto his wife Hypparchia was graunted to entre not onely into the gate but into the chambers and most secret places of all the citie and ther fore the Grekes called hym Thirepanictes that is a manne that might entre and go into other mennes houses For no man doeth mistruste or feare that he wyll defyle any other mās bed that agreeth so well with hys owne wyfe with so swete and so sure a knot is fastened vnto her All the whole familie do theyr dueties when the wife doth gladlye and wyllynglye helpe her husbande and the husbande his wyfe moued by the onely loue and concorde that is betwene them for he that is not moued nor styrde with y e furiousnes and commotions of the mynd may easely retayne and cause theym to doe theyr dueties so that he leaue not of nor fayleth not to doe hys owne duetye Thus they maye with diligence gouerne their goodes and substaunce so that neyther of them be alienate farre from their domesticall familier cares and busynesses and in their familie do rule tēperal thinges with loue He is far deceyued that doeth thinke that feare rewarde or anye other lyke thinge shal so quicken or prouoke a man to do his duetye as charitie and loue shal doe Menne perchaunce wyll not greatly meruel if theyr owne children be swete moste acceptable vnto thē the whiche yf they wer but y e chyldren of one of them yet loue myghte so worke that they shoulde be vnto eche other most accep table pleasaunt how much more then must the flame nedes burne vnto the whiche they bothe as it were putte torches vnder But this peraduenture shall seeme moore merueylous the which vnto those y t haue the knowledge of naturall thynges is moste playne sure that y e children of those whiche be married loue one another shalbe meke peaceable modeste amiable and apte to all kynde of benignitie and gentlenesse For why the qualities and affectiōs of y e father the mother the which do occupie the inwarde partes of manne are most commonlye transfuded into the bodies and soules of their children and of their pa rentes they learne placabilitie mekenes To lyue thus at home in tranquilitie concorde is muche lyke the celestial and heauenly lyfe wherof as sayeth that wise man in Homer greate ioye and cherefulnesse redoundeth vnto their frendes and to their enemies greate sorowe heauines and as the other reioyce these doe lament when they see or heare that we be other in hatred or in any discorde for the euyll and wycked man doeth desyre that is euyll exchueth vertue as a most pernitious poyson But all that I haue sayd hitherto although as ye doe see they are of great importaunce yet they can not be compared to thys one thynge that I wyll now saye At home we learne charitie the whiche we maye vse and shew towardes other that beinge in tranquillitie pleased with the suauitie and swetnes of mutual and correspondent loue we may y e ease lyer geue our selues to religion to contēplation to loue to geue reuerence to that om nipotēt diuine nature And our heartes being thus touched wyth matrimonial loue and with y e holy celestial fier we shal by litle and lytle be so kindled therwith that it shall conceyue bring forth great flames And what greater or more excellent gift may be desired or graunted of god vnto mākind then that we may be made true and faythful louers of that his diuine beauti fulnes ¶ Of those that haue no children VNto some the lord now and then geueth no childrē or els he taketh them agayne when he hath geuen them that by his secrete incomprehensible iudgement yea with a fatherly indulgēce and pitie For he seeth it to be for our profite y t it shuld be so lest y t we shoulde referre all thinges to fortune naturall causes the whiche thinge no wise man nor no christen man shuld do And let vs take it for no smal benefit y t we haue not proued of y t swete gal for after that we haue swalowed it we shall saye y t there is put vnto one drop of hony sixe hūdred droppes of gall And he did euē reasonably rekē it amongy e felicities of man to liue w tout childrē And August through his doughter his nyce was cōstrayned co rehearce euē w t alowd voyce these wordes of Homere Wold god I had ne uer bene married for then I shuld haue had no children I willet passe Cicero cōplaynts to Atticus Nor I wil not dis pute here of y e priuatiō of childrē but only monish exhort those y t be married y t they because the frute of chyldren is so vncertayn that oftenti mes they do bring vnto their parentes more calamitie then profite or pleasure seke not to haue children by anye flagitiousnes y t is with one certayn euil one vncertayn calamity Be not sharpe nor bitter to your baren wiues for y t chaun seth very often without anye faulte other of y e one or of the other or of thē bothe And ye shal vnderstand know y t the wyfe desyreth moore to haue childrē then y e husband as the wal that is falling desireth to haue shores to vphold it w t al. Anne y t wife of Helcana y t Ephraite was baren howe did her husband cōfort her Am not I qd he better to thee then tēne childrē It was very meete cōuenient y t Samuel y t prophete shoulde be gotten of a man If god do send the childrē receyue thē as y e gift of god ioyfullye instruct thē wel y t theyr goodnes honestie may profite thē selues the to not on ly for thy solace good name but also to augment the merites of this life by y t which the immortal reward of the eternal life is obtayned gotten ¶ Of her that is in age AFter y t an honest a wel nourtured wo mā waxeth old we must do as men vse to do to al faithfull diligent seruaūtes we loose vnbind our old horse and oxe suffer them to wander and to feede wher they wil thē selues and put them to lesse laboure we make our bondemen free and we assigne to olde souldiers certain possessions and feldes to lyue vpon we make oure free minister and seruaunt af ter that he hath well faythfullye serued vs equall as it were vnto vs and call him to our affinity Now much more oughtest thou then honorificently to intreate thy wyfe be ing aged and olde the whiche is no brute beast no bōdmayd nor of no worse cōdition then thou thy selfe nor thy hyred
Adā as it were diuining sayd y t two men shuld be in one fleshe vnto y e which wordes the lord our god dyd adde this y e matrimony once cōsumed made perfect they are no more two but one mā y t it might euidently appeare that true matrimonie cā not be betwene thre or foure but betwene two onelye And as oft as god him selfe speaketh of matrimony he neuer sayth husbandes wiues but wife and husband And the Apostle S. Paul to auoyd fornicatiō geueth counsel that euery man shuld haue his wife but he neuer sayeth hys wyues And truly whē the lord doth inhibite that men shuld not re fuse their wiues for any cause except it be for fornication he forbiddeth the multitude of wiues for if he mary another he calleth him an aduouterer Why shuld he be an aduouterer that marieth another his first wyfe beinge yet alyue yf it were lawfull for him at one tyme to haue manye wiues These he the lawes of nature the which in very dede shuld haue sufficed yf oure malitiousnes had lefte oure nature pure and whole as it came frō the handes of his maker But being now violated thorough vice inclininge vnto malitiousnes the age time y t ensued found remedies for this infirmitie as it were cer tayne barres doores to represse vice withal y t it creepe no farther For the worlde in the fyrst encrease of mans generation being yet but yong part of our old rude elders dyd dwel in caues and parte whē the cities were buylded in houses And at the begynginning the husband and the wife kept house together thē were children begotten and borne vnto the whiche there arose an incredible loue kind led with the fyrebrand of nature These childrē beyng of age maried wiues to encrease mākind withal their childrē encreased by whose meanes the loue of the fathers paste on vnto the sonne and doughter in law frō thence vnto theyr neues all these coupled together by the selfe same loue and charitie remay ned in one house beyng parta kers of one fyre loue makyng althinges cōmon or to speak more truly one thing onelye But consanguinitie affinity crepte in alytle further beyng many in nūber wold not depart frō y t familye because they of youth were broughte vp together for there is no sweter thinge then of childrē to haue bene conuersaunte acquaynted because they were suche persons whome they loued as thē selues they could not be departed except they shuld haue bene seperated drawen frō thē selues And although certayn of thē were remoued gone as it were to dwel in another place yet that notwithstandinge they oftentimes returned vn to theyr originall house and were most familiarly conuersaunt together But suche as were wyse and by longe expe rience witty perceauing that chastitie through the feruent nes and heate of youth was in great daūger iudged that such feruentnes motions of youth ought by some religiō lawes to be 〈◊〉 repressed for vnto nature it appeared truely a thing most abhominable to mary other wyth mother nece or doughter y e which thing Adā nature not beyng yet corrupted dyd suf ficiently ynough declare whē that he lokyng vpon his wife sayd Beholde now the bone of my bones the flesh of my fleshe for this shall man leaue both father and mother the which he wold not haue lefte yf he might haue maried her Necessitie scarcenes of peo ple coupled brother syster together But humanitie by a litle litle the world being somwhat more replenyshed begā to despise refuse y t kind of mariage manye nations auoyded it by lawes by religion forbad y t suche as were so nighe of cōsanguinitie and kind should not marye together for it semed vnto thē vn mete that any such should be coupled together and that al such mariages shuld be thoughte incestious agaynste all right by the auctoritie and wil of the superior inhibited for whether we beholde humayne thinges the law that is the consente of the citezins forbiddeth them or diuyne thinges the maiestie of god forbiddeth thē so it foloweth that chastitie shuld be in sauegarde within the walles and houses of those y t are of consanguinitie for it was sufficient ynough vnto the simplici tie and innocencye of oure elders to abstaine 〈◊〉 the thing not wonte to be vsed vnto whome it was ynough in times paste to saye I wil not 〈◊〉 Quirites But in the tyme age y t folowed they coulde not be 〈◊〉 frō 〈◊〉 no not 〈◊〉 manye 〈◊〉 threatninges terrours prysons nor 〈◊〉 wyth death so feble are we to goodnes and so strong mightye agaynste modestiousnes nor we do nothing more coragiously then to disprayse contemne vertue And for asmuche as there is no beast vnto whome concord beneuolence is so profi table or so necessary to ioyne amitie to amplifie loue and charitie withal as to man it is prouided as Cicero S. Augustine do write most notablye that menne shoulde take their wiues from other places and their doughters theyr husbandes out of their families and houses wherby great loue should aryse encrease by such bondes of affinitie the one shuld greatlye fauour the other cōsideryng y e therby great frendshyp and kyured shuld ensue folowe that finally both gods lawe and mans shoulde make and knyt vp as it were a knot of pietie faythfull loue And so it is come to passe that charitye which nature had sprinckled thorowout al humayne generation was restrayned through the affections of the iniquitie of man vnto a feaw is now by the meanes of matrimony spred abroade not in one or two houses only but in cities kinredes nations y e which throughe one sole mariage haue bene reuoked frō sharpe dissentiōs vnto louing and swere agreament concord But how farre it is law ful or vnlawful to procede in these thynges by the ciuill canon lawe defined it is not to be disputed vpon at thys time but hereafter we shall speake thereof when that we by the helpe of Christe shall write of the common welthe But when so great darcknes was in the soule of man and in his wil so great iniquitie that corruption was encreased in man by y e continuaūce of euyll it semed good vnto god to restore his worke for he sente his sonne by whome he made the world to reconcile vs after to great dissention discord vnto the father and to be the clarifier of oure 〈◊〉 an ensample of y e woorkes and dedes of lyfe And he puttinge forthe hys hande lifted vp mankinde lyinge vpon the earth and waloyng in mire to looke vp into heauen and to be partaker of the light thereof And although he hadde blowen hys trompet all they that hearde that celestiall and heauenlye voyce contemning and leauing all other thinges apart dyd hye them towardes so
acceptable for that were euen to brynge vnto their children whileste they fulfill accoÌ„plishe their proper wil affections a mi serable and a wretched lyfe and a burden intolerable And yf thou prepare for thy sonne nobilitie riches power and dignitie to serue thy coÌ„moditie withal what other thing is that then to vse thy chylde as an instrumente of thy cupiditie and pleasure not doubting to cast thy child into such a deuourynge euill to saciate and fulfil thy filthy desire withal that he shal not be able to beare it withoute cursyng the both priuately apertly But yf there be any whether he be olde or yong that of hym selfe doth not per ceaue what thys thyng mea neth let him couÌ„sell with his very frendes and other that are prudeÌ„t wise Nor at no time he must consente to the opinion of y e coÌ„mon people specially in this deliberation choosing of a wife the which is the foundatioÌ„ of the whole life of maÌ„ Is there any thing more out of tune more 〈◊〉 or more without shape then the vulgare and coÌ„mon people called of those that are wise a beast of mauy heades And whoso foloweth y e same must nedes be as it is itself inwrapped with many euils liue as it doth a most wretched life What wisdome can be there where affections be vehement readye at the coÌ„maundemeÌ„tes of ignorauÌ„ce What a thing shuld it be that he the whiche by choosing of an euil wife is most vnfortunateste shoulde desire me to choose as he did to what end shuld this thinge come but y t I should intricate my selfe w t like misery and that he by my coÌ„playntes shuld defend hys faute throughe the societie fellowshyp of my mischaunce or take some coÌ„fort of his misfortune coÌ„sideringe the same to be coÌ„mon with other But let him choose first shew me that he liueth a swete and a pleasaunt lyfe and that he repenteth him not of his iudge ment then let him cal me by his ensample to folow y e same trade of liuing But yf he be punished for his euill election choyse let him shew me rather how to flee auoyde the daunger If any thing other by prayer or by vowe should be asked of god that is coÌ„modious profitable for mans life a good wife is chiefely to be asked the which shal make that y t is prosperous more prosperous aduersiti more easye But an euill wyfe thorough prosperitie waxeth ar rogant proude in aduersitie she looseth her courage so y t both in welth woo she is intolerable And therfore the Frenche prouerbe is not withoute a cause coÌ„mended saying that he can not be wel borne that is not wel wiued Socrates doth say y t whoso de maundeth of God a wife ryches or power demaundeth as it were licence to playe at dice or to fight a battaile for the ende of thosethinges are vncertayne If a man aske a good woman the successe ende therof is certayn geuen of god vnto man as a sin guler great gifte as Salomon beareth witnes in his Prouerbes saying House heri tage may a man haue by the inheritaunce of hys elders but a wyse woman is the pro per gift of god Iesus the sonne of Syrach sayeth A good and a vertuouse womanne is a good gyft shalbe geueÌ„ vnto her husband and to those that feare god for a good por tion But to thintent that euery maÌ„ may know what he shuld looke to haue of a womaÌ„ or euer he choose her I haue determined w e fewe wordes to describe the nature of a womanne to thende that no man lokynge to haue of her thynges impossible shoulde be deceaued A man doth coÌ„siste of two thynges y e soule and the bodye In y t soule there is as it were two partes y e superior wherin is iudgement counsell and reason the which is called the mind The inferior part is in the which are the motions perturbations the which the Grekes cal Pathi The affections do growe of opinions the which are more in one theÌ„ in another after the disposition the customes vsaunce of the bodye age helth maner vse of liuing time place the which dochaunge and moue the disposition of the bodye consequeÌ„tly do worke in that part of the soule that is annexed vnto the body the which we cal the inferior parte and therefore the affections as y e persuasions of thinges opinions be are common to al ages But yet some of theÌ„ are of more power in man then in woman contraryewyse in woman then in man After y t nature hath cast the sede of man into the motherly natural place it incorporateth the same and yf it find sufficient heate it bringeth forth a man childe yf not a woman So that when it wanteth y t most excellent actiue liuely qualitie the woman remayneth feble weake not onely in humayne generation but also in all other proportion of her kynd and through suche filthines as increaseth in her the which y t feble heate that is in her is not sufficient nor able to caste forth she is lesse of stature more sickly then other be and of this by by yf she be not greate bellied she fuffreth her meÌ„strua she is time rous also for it is heat that encourageth the man maketh him bold and hardy and through feare she is coue tous taught secretly by nature she knoweth her selfe to be feble and nedefull of many thinges busye about many trifles lyke vnto a ruinous house that muste be vnderset and vpholden wyth manye smal proppes And throughe feare she is full of suspition coÌ„ playntes enuious and troubled with manye and diuerse thoughtes And for lacke of experience of thinges of wisdome and of knowynge her owne debilitie she thinketh continuallye that she shall be despised and therfore in this feble and weake nature anger and a desire to be 〈◊〉 dothe kyndle as it were in flaxe continually She loueth also to be 〈◊〉 and well apparelled because she wolde not be contemned and as unpotente and subiecte to all casualties on euerye syde she doth seke where vnto she may leane and staye her selfe And thou shalte easelye perceaue that certayne of them do attribute vnto glorye thynges of no estimation as to haue some great man to her 〈◊〉 boure or that some 〈◊〉 and myghtye prince dyd salute her or call vnto her I wyll not speake of these 〈◊〉 the whiche vnto many y t woulde be sene to be mooste strongest are thoughte moste pretious as of â—inred riches beautie frendes Of y t selfe same feare doth superstition arise and growe for as wysdome doth perswade moue a manne to religion so dothe vayne feare leade a man to su perstition Manye womeÌ„ are full of woordes partlye thorough the varietie of though tes and affections the which as they succede
do whereby they maye be blamed or suspected Nor superstition in a woman is not intolerable so that it be not so anxius that true religion be therewith extingui shed Nor I do not commend that woman the whiche doth not of a greate carefulnes she hathe vnto religion incline to superstition except she be one of the absolute and perfecte sort of matrones These be the inclinations of women the which may be bowed vnto that that is good as the inclinations of men maye as hereafter shal be declared In y e meane space there are none in this nature to be refused excepte thou wilte none and had deste rather lyue alone withoute anye companye at all The ende of matrimonye is to haue chyldren and to lyue together and manye do erre mooste 〈◊〉 in bothe Some there be that force not of what sorte of women they gette theyr children when that they the whyche other by fortune or by the gyftes of nature are more excellente then other shuld diligently take hede y t they cast not so noble sede into euill grounde that it be not corrupted with some euil naughtie qualitie For we see that diligent husbandmen doo diligentlye take hede to choose out that grouÌ„d which is most apte and conueniente for their sede leste they loose yf the grounde beynge euill and naughtes brynge for the euyl corne both coste and laboure and so much the more they do sorow the thing how much the goodnes of y e sede dyd put them in good hope comfort To this is ioyned y t the more tenderly the father loueth his chylde the more it greueth him that he shoulde take any incurable vice of the mother the whiche thynge comyng by her should grâ—ue hym not a lytle Agayne of what â—reare importaunce is it to liue together Nor there is nothynge more tedious nor more greuous vnto man then by the waye to be in com pany with an euyll and a foolishe companion And it were a great deale better to liue alone then with an euyll man and to playe with a whelpe then to reason w t a focle O what a madnes were it then not to thinke it to make any thynge at al to the matter of what nature qualities she be with whome thou muste both lyue dye yf perchauÌ„ce she be molestious or otherwyse vnto the then thoughtes As touchyng the chylde two thinges are to be wayde and considered the body and the minde of the woman and that her body be not to farre out of fashion The magistrates of the Lacedemonians called Ephori coÌ„demned king Archidamus because he hadde maried a wife of a lowe stature whose children shoulde not sufficientlye ynoughe represent the person and dignitie of a kinge althoughe this thinge be not of suche importaunce that a man shuld ther fore refuse his wife so that she haue sufficiently ynoughe all other qualities For we do see that suche short and defor med women bring forth most beautifull and goodlye children We shoulde rather take bede that she be not infected with some infirmitie or strange disease and sicknes y t whiche y e phisitions do call hereditarie and do procede from the parentes vnto their children of the which some there be most filthy letting the due tie and office of life These are more diligently to be eschued then those whiche are not so horrible and filthye And yf thou thy self be infected with anye suche infirmitie I wold thou shouldest dispose thy self to liue chaste withoute sinne for as it is a thing most swete and delectable to haue children so it is verye sharpe and a discomfortable thyng to see them oppressed wyth greuouse infyrmityes and diseases the which yf it were possible we would rather desire to haue and to suffer our selues then with our so greate payne and heauines to se theÌ„ in our children And therfore we oughte to consider take hede y t our myndes be sound and that oure contagiousnes nor vice nether by nature nor by custome do infect our children I saye the selfe same by the man for this is the office and duetie of a good man to be contente with his misfortune and chaunce not to let it creepe forth to infect other If we vse suche loue charitye vnto oure frendes that they in no wyse nor maner be not infected wyth oure infirmytyes howe muche more shoulde we be studious towardes our owne childreÌ„ And fathers thus counseled do vse to mary their children for yonge men will heare no suche counsell for the more madder they be the more wiser they thinke them selues And that is the chiefest poynt of all madnes to thinke hym self wise Unto these thinges adde this y e thy childes mind be not throughe education maners contaminated for y t thing is very hurtfull for thy sonne and pestiferous for thy daughter the which beynge nourished and brought vppe with their mothers obeye vn to their counsels and studye in word and dede to ensue folowe the same And as for the stocke and kynred there neadeth not in this consultation of childreÌ„ to be any great sollicitude or care for the chil dren do folowe thee and not the woman Thus muche we haue spoken of children Let vs now speake of the coÌ„munion of life wherin must be considered thinges bothe good euill profitable and vnprofitable Loue whereof amitie dothe take her name dothe growe of this opinion y t the thing is good and fayre and this is the knot of amitie the which once taken away amitie fayleth And therfore true and durable loue is onelye amonge those that are good amonge whome there is but one constante rule and maner of liuinge But the euill vnited and coupled together w e an euill intent and desire are no longer frendes then that desire endureth for yf that vanyshe awaye and fayle the force and strengthe of theyr loue and amitie doth decaye for the knot that knit fast it to gether is remoued And therefore we muste consider both the goodnes of the mind and of the body and whether suche thinges as chaunce and happen vnto man of the exterior thinges be good after y e mind of the Peripatikes are euil or coÌ„modious or incoÌ„modious after the mind of y e Stoickes but I labor not greatly in these thinges In the soule are these sharpnes dulnes swiftnes slouthfulnes subteltie simplicitie malignity goodnes helth infirmitie inclinatioÌ„ to vice and vertue variablye and suche thinges which are gotteÌ„ by vse as artes knowledge rudines wisdom foolishnes and all vertues vice contrary vnto these In the body are these age helth stature for me strengthe and beautie The exterior thynges are these kynred fame ri ches dignitie grace and condition I haue reckened vp euen sufficiently ynough these qualities for thys my treatise because I haue no place here to intreate of theÌ„ more largely These thinges of the body maye be easelye
he is the self same thyng with another And god doth saye y t the wife with her husband is al one thing And Cicero to cōfirme kepe amitie geueth this counsel that the inferior shuld ascend the superior descend for so y t things may be brought to equalitie But in matrimonye this nedeth not for it is sufficiente both for y t man the wyfe to perceyue vnderstand that they are parte eche of others bodye And therefore to be fayre or foule ryche or poore noble or ignoble whole or sicke wyse or folyshe is nowe throughe the operation and work of God the which hath made them bothe one common vnto them bothe Nor there shall neuer be true and cōtinual loue except it be stablyshed vpon those thynges that remayne after death For beauty ryches kinred suche other haue their tyme some appoynted by nature some by fortune other humaine chaūces Thei haue also their sacietie in time and place thei are forgotten For we can not at all tymes and seasons remember the Fabians the Cornelians and that we receyued a greate dowrye The affection with the tyme doth waxe feble cold and the plentifulnes and vse of that that a man dyd gredely fyrst desyre doeth cause him to lothe it Al these thinges do diminishe loue certē of thē do vtterly extinguishe it the which if it had bene in the mind in vertue shoulde haue continued for euer For vertue is euer at hand neuer ydle neuer vnprofitable nor voide but alwayes working Nor y t soule of mā by y e death of the bodye doeth not die so that we may beleue that thei whiche be departed doe loue all suche as in thys worlde were deare vnto theym and that they whyche loued the Soules of those whyche bee departed and deliuered from the bodye do loue them not as deade but as they loue their frendes y t which are absent farre frō them And therfore we do see many women that kepe their fayth loue vnto their firste husbandes as did Demotions the Ariopagites doughter of the which S. Hierome doth write agaynste Iouiniane the whiche after that her spouse Leostenes was deade woulde mary with none other saying that she should marry an aduouterer no husband for although he wer departed yet he was aliue vnto her And so sayd that womā of Rome And how sharpely wittelye doth Lucane bring in Cornelia Scipio Metellus doughter and Pompeus last wife taking and esteminge her selfe but as an harlot as touchinge Iulia hys first wife as though the knot and band of matrimonye and loue did yet indure bet wixte the liuing and deade And naturally euery man desireth to be loued and doth searche for the fauour of other men and studieth to kepe to encrease those thinges that cause hym to be in fauour If thy wife do perceaue that thou art rauished and taken with her beau tie and would that thou shuldest loue her she wil do al her diligence to encrease augmente it yf with her communication she will neuer cease pratling yf with her vertue she wil dayly labor howe in all honest vertuous dedes she maye be better By as one of the seuen wise sage men of Grece gaue this one precept rule of loue Loue so sayth By as y t thou mayste hate and hate y t thou mayst loue I can not saye whether this wyse man doth more folowe the figure of wordes then y t truth of the sentence inasmuche as he dothe teache that no man shuld be to other nother faith full frende nor enemye And therefore Cicero doeth saye full truelye that all amitye and frendshyppe shoulde decaye yf a manne shoulde loue so that he maye hate What shoulde he truste then what shuld he beleue or to whome shoulde he open hys mynde or how shuld he loue him tru ly and with al his heart whē he may coniectute and thynk that in time to come he wil be or may by his enemy surelye he will drawe backe and prouide agaynst such thinges as may fortune chaunce And therefore this sentence maye thus more cōuenientlye both for the vse of nature of this life be turned Loue neuer to hate but hate to loue when time shal be Euery man shuld loue his frend simply but speciallye his wyfe And forasmuche as loue other affectes are named of the Philosophers Habitus the whiche are conserued and kept in vs through time operation and labour we muste euen at the beginning geue our diligēce that all iniuries and offences maye be auoyded for as Plutarke doth saye tender softe loue is sone broken Therfore that newe loue coniunction of the mind must be nourished with benigne swete gentle conuersation vntil it be so increased fastened y t no great storme be able to dissolue or breake it And al suspitiō must be at all times but specially at the beginning of matrimony auoyded lest thou firste begin to hate or euer thou beginne to loue And beware thou fayne it not nor conceaue it of no light occasions coniectures for vnto suche thou shouldeste geue no eare although there were great apparence liklyhode Ther is no man so well fashioned and brought vp that can satisfye all men and he that was able to auoyde the faute was not able to auoyde suspition for y e iudgementes of men are free and licentious they do interprete y t they see and heare not after the truth but after their affections and the coniecture that they do fayne reioyce in vnto the whiche some do geue more credite then some Pansanias in platose Simpose doth put two Venus two loues a heauenly and an earthly The earthly is blind abiect vyle fyithye and occupyed aboute vile and filthye thinges neuer lokynge vp to thinges of more worthines But that celestiall and heauēly loue doth see most cleare lye folowyng vertue those thynges whiche are mooste beautifull and moost lyke vnto heauenlye thinges Those husbandes that loue the beau tye or the ryches of their wiues are blynde and subiecte to that earthly loue not perceauinge the reason nor yet the measure therof But thei whiche are true husbandes loue the soule and vertue and haue a iudgemente in loue and beyng inspired wyth the strengthe and spirite of that celestiall loue do loue wyselye for pure and holye loue dothe not vyolentlye compel them as that doeth whyche is earthlye but prudentelye doth guyde and conduct thē gently perswaded to y e place they shuld go vnto The wise husbande doth loue his wyfe feruentlye but yet as the father loueth his sonne y e head the body the soule the fleshe and as Christe dothe loue his churche thus must the husbande the wife loue eche other Nature it felfe dothe teache vs this they lykewise that are learned in diuine letters do tel vs y e same Adam was firste created like vnto
and preceptes of holy scripture aboue anye other rule or precepte of philosophye and consider the saying of the holy Apostle Begyle not youre wyues excepte it be by a common consent to geue your selues to fa styng or prayer that done come spedely together again least that Sathan throughe your incontinencie do tempt you A christian oughte euen verye often to erect him selfe in spirite and beleue that he shuld not passe ouer coÌ„sume his dayes in carnal fleshely thoughtes for yf he lyue not in spirite as a christian shulde doe he nother satisfieth hys name nor yet his proffession nor they shall not obtayne that promysed felicitie but with a spirituall and a ghostlye lyfe wherwith they must be vnited and coupled vnto god and to that moste purest spirite vnto the which no maÌ„ can approche nor come but by the puritie and clennes of spi rite the whiche is so muche the more made perfect howe much it doth study to seperate and deuide it selfe from the contagiousnes infection of the fleashe As longe as by the coÌ„maundement of the celestial god we are included in this mortall bodye we muste prouide that the spirite may lyue and y t the body maye labor serue y t spirite as we do perceyue see in a horse for if he be scarcelye fed he cannot beare the burden if he be de licatly fed he wil be stuburne But as oyle must at certayne times be powred into y t laÌ„pe that it maye burne so are the times in the which we do infuÌ„de powre oyle both into y t body soule These two haue their time to be restored although at no time for our tyme being we shuld fuffer theÌ„ to perishe taking good heede that by the restoring of y t one the other be not extinguished nor that by seruyng of y t one the other waxe slacke feeble Therfore when w t fastynge prayer we do water the spirite w t oyle Paule wyl leth vs to refrayne froÌ„ those works y t resiste as it wer do water the oyle y t doeth bathe the spirite Fastynge doeth kepe vnder the bodye subdueth it that it let not the spi rite of this the flamynge and burnyng spirite doth eleuate and lift vp it self in praier the which is a meditacion of high thinges not of one houre but of many daies for to accustome y t mind to those workes y t whiche after it be dissolued loused froÌ„ y t body it must performe do The lord wheÌ„ we pray willeth vs to speake few words to be long in medita tion and therfore he admonisheth vs to praye continualy And Paules mind is that we beyng geuen to this meditation should abstaine from car nal copulatioÌ„ lest y t the ponde rous fleshe draw vs froÌ„ it inasmuch as that carnal copula tion of it self is a beastly thing twinynge the mind from his highe contemplation And y e wise maÌ„ when it was asked hym when that a man should vse that carnal fleshly acte answered that wheÌ„ he wolde be equal w t a beast All the life of a christian man should be a continual fast no day shulde escape w t out prayer somtymes of the yere christian men ought to liue chast abstayne from their wiues geue theÌ„ selues to abstinence prayer and for that time they muste not only abstayne from theyr embracementes and frome lyinge one wyth the other but also from suche pleasures and delites as may prouoke the body obscure the lighte of the mind soule And then they must be thinke theÌ„ what they are what life is what y t vse of thinges is whither they shal how they were takeÌ„ and bought of sinne how they were redemed by Christ and of other thinges the whiche a christian shuld both knowe and vnderstand But y t Apostle doth teache vs that suche separation muste be done by bothe their consentes to kepe vnitie and concorde and the loue of Christe geuinge their mindes to please God without any offeÌ„ce or hurt of their neighbor It pleaseth me wel to write the minde of Fulgenâ—ius in this matter When ye come and resorte together sayeth he do all thynges honestlye giuynge such place in that carnall acte to infirmitie that the fleshe serue not to luxuriousnesse but that the ver tue of the soule and mynde holpen by GOD maye refrayne the concupiscence of the bodye And they which are marryed muste so honestlye geue them selues to the generation of chyldren that the faythfull manne preparynge and geuynge hym selfe to that acte may by the helpe of GOD in that be modestious And in another place he sayeth Lette those which are married principallye remembre that they geue them selues to almose dedes and to prayer and not continuallye to continue and stande in the infirmitie weakenes of the fleshe but to study to as cende to a better life that the mind maye come to continency that carnal lust may euery day more more be bridled refrayned y t after we haue passed ouer that state degre wherein the infirmitie of maÌ„ requireth pardon forgeuenes we maye obtayne the rewarde of a better life for the which we do tarye and looke And this as touching y t sprite Also they must abstayn when they are sicke diseased lest y t thei which are whole sound chaunce to be infected A wo manne well broughte vppe is frutefull and profitable vnto her husbande for so shall his house be wisely gouerned his children vertuouslye instructed the affections lesse insued folowed so that they shall liue in tranquillitie and pleasure Nor thou shalt not haue her as a seruaunt or as a com panion of thy prosperitie and welfare onelye but also as a most faythful secretary of thy cares thoughtes in doubt full matters a wise a harty counseler This is the true so cietie felowship of man not onlye to participate with him our paynes trauelles but also the affections and cares of our mind the which do no lesse trouble the body then to plowe to digge to delue or to beare any heauy or weyghty burden for yf their full burning hartes shuld not disclose and open them selues â—hey wold none otherwise breake then a vessel replenished with fire y t hath no vente for carefulnes thoughtes are fire that doeth inâ—â—ame consume the heart And therefore we see certayne men the whiche as thoughe they were wyth child through care coÌ„motions of the minde do seke for some one vpon whome they may discharge theÌ„ of their bur den as Terence sayth O Jupiter how happeneth this y t I meete with no curious felowe the which wold instant lye aske me wherefore I am thus mery whether I go froÌ„ whence I come c. We do read y t many haue died sodenly of soden mirth feare heauâ—â—es What riches maye be
tēperā cie of mind is most aproued most effectuous as whē thou she west thy selse to be moued wyth the greatnesse of the faulte not for any disdaine nor to satisfye and contente thine affections but to amēd her whome thou rebukest Thou muste obserue bothe tyme and place leaste that throughe feruentnes of reprehention thou bespot thy wyfe and cause thy chaunces to be openlye knowen to straungers and other thy familiars whereby in tyme to come thy wyfe shall continuallye hate thee Be not longe angry leaste y t thy desperate wyfe fall headlonge into vice and noughtynes The apostle sayth ye husbandes loue your wyues and be not bitter vnto theym And yf the lorde forbyd vs to be angrye wyth oure brother howe muche y e lesse ought we to be angrye with our wyues the which exceade all brotherlye loue and beneuolence as we haue tolde you before and it is meate it be often times repeted And yf manne be the head of the woman Christe the head of the man he must vse hym selfe vnto the womanne as Christe doeth vse him selfe vnto us that is beniglye and frendelye And the selfe same Apostle doeth call the womanne the bodye of the manne as the churche is the bodye of Christe And not wythstandynge we sustayne and suffer manye incommodities of the bodye yet we hate it not but suffereth it nourysheth it and gouerneth it The husbandes reprehention muste be short for yf it shoulde continue hatred would ensue the whiche woulde coule matrimoniall loue kyndle disdayne and chaunge the swetenesse of theyr conuersation into bytternes Furthermore thou muste alledge the reason and cause that moueth thee to rebuke her that bothe nowe and in tyme to come she may be admonished The force and strengthe of reason hath great power in the mynde of man nor there is nothynge that so cleaueth vnto it nor lesse penetreth the same as thys sentence Thus I wyll and thus I commaunde Thou muste so rebuke her that she maye perceyue it to procede come of good loue to make her better and to be without vice or faulte y t the loue whiche is betwene you maye be the more feruēt and without anye quarel or complaynt at al. Therfore assone as thou hast chastened corrected her and that she other by worde honeste shamefastnes or silence doeth declare that she wyll obey thee geue her then fayre wordes again and a gentle countenaunce as thou waste wonte to doe Ther are in noble women as ther is among men certayne excellente motions of the mynde the whyche to those that be not wyse and doe marcke the thynge but slenderlye seme to come of arrogancye and pryde Nor these ought not vtterly to be kept vnder and cleane extinguished for without theym they canne not approche nor come to that hyghe and memorable ornament that exciteth and moueth man to maruaile and to prayse extolle them Such affections of the mind are apte meete to conserue and kepe the honestye chastitie of women Such noble women shuld not be greuously or sharpely reprehēded or rebuked but drawen frō vice other by y e example or vertue of such women as be gone alreadye or of those that they were aquaynted wyth all or elles by puttynge theym in remembraunce of theyr olde vertue and godlye lyuynge To some woman a becke of her husbande is sufficient to declare y t there is somewhat amisse y t displeaseth him and specially yf she beare her hus bād any reuerēce An honest matrone hath no nede of any greter staffe but of one worde or one sowre coūtenaunce of her husband But where y t this can not helpe but that brawling staues acre must nedes be vsed I geue no pre ceptes nor rules for there they vse violence but yet by mine aduice the husband shal neuer come to y t extremitye for yf thy wife be often rebuked will not bowe but waxeth more stiffe croked yet inasmuche as she kepeth her selfe pure chaste she must be supported and borne withal Nor the bow must not be bro ken with to muche bendynge therof Thus dyd Socrates forbeare his wife Xantippa whom we should folow yf we wer so wvse as to thinke that our pacience by reason of the womā is exercised proued to y e augmentation increase of vertue as Iob Toby did to theyr great profite and to the womans rebuke shame as y t lord whensoeuer it shall be wyl declare iudge aswel of the one as of the other Also he must thinke that she fell vnto him by lotte as his kinred hys countrey hys body hys soule and hys wyt dyd wherwith euery man ought to holde hym contente thynkynge with him selfe that the omnipotente and euerlasting God doeth dispence and order al thynge moste wyselye and moste iustelye Finallye it is meete and conueniente that the authoritye of God whyche coupled theym together shoulde sette them at one yf they were out agre thē And what man durste be so bolde to breake the peace that the king hath made Or who wolde reiect him that by some noble man was cōmaun ded deliuered vnto him yf in thys thyng the reuerence that we haue and beare vnto those whyche are of greate power be of suche force and strengthe or elles loue it selfe howe muche shoulde it be towardes god for who is so mighty or so louinge vnto vs as he him we shuld reue rence loue aboue all other thinges Also he ought to remēber what Paule sayeth y e the wife the husband are al one flesh Of y e body do come continually many incōmodities but yet no manne dothe hate it but to his power doth nourish it yf at any time he be miscontent there with by and by he pleaseth it agayne Such like loue shuld euerye man beare his wise and this after the minde of y e Apostle ¶ Of the proceding and going forwardes in matrimony AFter y e thou haste had experience of thy wife y u oughteste to loue her more tenderlye And nature doth induce a man to that y t which doth make swete familiar and customable thinges be thei neuer so sharpe or greuous for the vse continuall cōpany doth so establishe and cōfirme loue beneuolence y t we vpon that occasion doe loue dogges cattes horses other brute beastes and do mourne sorow their death and absence And what thing is lesse conueniente for a wise a well nourtred man then not to loue his wife whose cō pany he hath so longe so familiarly vsed Meleager Oeneus sōne being both angry w t him selfe all hys sat him downe in his chamber The Curetes whiche made warre agaynst the Calidonians assayled the citie molested them so sort that ther was no hope nother in man nor woman The elders of y t citie came vnto Me leager the only saue garde of al the countrey desiryng