many thousand times more uxworthy am I a wretched and wicked sinner Ch It is true neither they nor thou As the Prodigalls Father did his son Lu. 15.21 22. could be worthy of your selves but yet I am willing to account you worthy Luk. 20.35 and 21.36 Rev. 3.4 Bel. But Lord if there were any thing that were good in me it might a little incourage me to come unto thee but I find nothing but evill in me Ch Dost thou not know that without me thou canst (e) Ioh 15.5 doe nothing and that a man can (f) Joh 3.27 receive nothing except it bee given him from heaven Why then dost thou stay away from me who must (g) Esa 26.12.2 12. worke all thy workes in thee And 2. Because thou seest nothing but evill in thee thou shouldst the rather come unto me who am the (h) Zac. 13.1 Fountaine wherein thy unclean soule must be washed and unlesse I (i) Eze. 36.25 1.9 wash thee thou canst not bee cleane nor have any (k) Joh. 13.8 part in me Bel True Lord thou art the Fountaine and wel-spring of life and it is thy blood and nothing else that can wash away my sins but how can I come near to thee who am so wicked that for ought I know have counted thy blood an (l) Heb. 10.29 unholy thing Ch Thou poor Ac. 2.36.41 dear and doubting soule what if thou hadst had a hand in crucifying mee as the Jewes had yet cannot I forgive thee as I did many of them But thou hast not accounted my blood an unholy thing for thou still desirest to have thy sins washed away by it Bel What the Iewes did they did ignorantly but I have sinned against knowledge which makes my sins worse then theirs Ch If thou hast finned against knowledge yet thou hast not sinned so but that thou maist be forgiven For my deare Disciple Peter sinned against knowledge when hee denied with an oath that hee knew me not Mat. 26.72 Bel. Oh but yet my sinnes are worse then his for his sin was but one sin and that a suddaine and short sin but I have sinned many sinnes and continued long in them Ch So did my beloved servant David who was a man according to my owne heart commit severall sinnes together as Murther Whoredome c. and continued a while too in his sinnes Bel. Oh but Lord those servants of thine though they sinned against thee yet they expressed a great deale of sence of their sins and sorrow for them but I can neither be sensible of nor sorrowfull for mine Ch Oh sweet soule thou mistakest and forgettest thy selfe for thou dost often confesse thy sinnes before me with sence shame and sorrow And I hear thee daily bemoaning and complaining and saying I have (n) Iob 7.20 Psal 51.4 Lam. 5.16 sinned against the Lord woe is me for I am undone Bel Oh good Lord it is not without cause that I cry wo is me I am undone for I thinke there is no soule in such a dangerous and desperate condition as mine is in Ch Why doest thou thinke and say so Bel. Because I have sinned that unpardonable sin against thy spirit Ch Oh thou poor and precious soule thou dost but thinke so and feare so But tell mee how canst thou sin that sin against my Spirit and yet pray for more of my Spirit and so much prize my Spirit as thou dost Bel Oh Lord I have often grieved and quenched thy Spirit and is not this to commit that unpardonable sin Ch My owne deare and loving children may and doe sometimes grieve my spirit by sinning and quench the gracious motions of it and yet doe not sin that unpardonable sinne Eph. 4.30 1 Thes 5.19 Esay 63.10 Bel Oh but I can thinke no lesse but that I have committed that sin for I have had hard cruell and desperate thoughts in my heart against the Holy Spirit Ch Though my childe thou hast had such thoughts in thy heart yet thou hast not spoken evill of my Spirit as the Jewes did which is the sin of blasphemy and that unpardonable sinne Mat. 12.24 28 31. Mark 3.22 to 30. Bel Lord I am not sure but that I have spoken evill words of thy spirit for I know I have many times uttered vile bitter and cursed words Ch Notwithstanding thou didest through the violence of thy temptations and in the bitternesse of thy Soule speake such words as my servants Job Iob 3.1 to 13 10 18 23.15 16. Ps 31.22 116.11 Ier 20.14 c. Ionah 4.3 4 9. Mat. 26 72 74 David Jeremy Jonah and Peter did yet thou hast not done despight nor sinned maliciously and willfully against my Spirit of grace as Reprobates doe Heb. 10.29 Bel. Oh I have been and still am very wilfull and have often sinned wilfully and thou sayest in thy word that if any sinne wilfully after they receive the knowledge of the truth there remaineth no more sacrifice for sins Heb. 10.26 Ch Thou deare soule have not I heard thee often in prayer complaining of and bewailing thy sins and beging earnestly for power against them therefore it is rather against thy will then wilfully that thou dost sinne Bel. Oh but I finde sinnes in power in my soule which if I were a Saint they would not be so Ch My servant Paul found sinne so strong in him that he confessed he was carnall and sold under sin and that he found a law in his members Sin was in power in Paul when it could carry him captive warring against the law of his minde and bringing him into captivity to the law of sinne Rom. 14.23 Bel. Oh but neither Paul nor any other Saint hath sinned presumptuously as I have done Ch. My servant David prayed that hee might bee kept from presumptuous sins for he was subject thereunto Psa 19.13 It is probable that David sined presumptuously in killing Vriah and so are the best of my Saints Bel. But Lord I have rebelled against thee Ch So did my servants of * Is 1.2 63.20 old but I have received * Ps 68.18 gifts for the Rebillious and to me belongs mercies and forgivenesse though thou hast rebelled against me Dan. 9.9 Bel Oh but my Rebellion is the worst Rebellion of all for I have rebelled against the light I have professed thee and yet I have belyed thee and made an hypocriticall profession I seemed like Judas to be thy friend whilst in my heart I did not love thee Ch The house of Israel and the house of Judah dealt treacherously against me the Lord and belied me and Ephraim my deare sonne compassed me about with lies yet was I gracious to them Jer. 5.11.12 Hos 11.12 with Jer. 23.6 and 31.20 Bel. But Lord Ephraim was never so wicked as I am and guilty of such Lukewarmnesse Hypocrisie and Backesliding as I am guilty of Ch Yea Ephraim was as a cake not turned And Ephraim fed
of them Jesus Poore Publican What makes thee draw near to mee Publican Because they say Lord that thou art a friend of Publicans and Sinners Matth. 11.19 J. So I am and thou art welcome my beloved friend sit downe therefore with me and my Disciples Mat. 9.10 P. Good Master though I am unworthy to come into thy presence yet through thy leave I le sit here at thy feet to heare thy gracious words Mar. 7.25 Luke 10.39 Joh. 12.3 J. How knowest thou that my words are gracious P. Lord I have heard thee say that Publicans and Harlots shall enter into the King dome of heaven before the Pharisees which thinke themselves far better then us Mat. 21.31 Luke 18.11.12 J. And what say the Pharisees to that P. They murmure among themselves and say This man receiveth sinners and eateth with them Luke 15.2 J. Didst thou ever heare me preach besides that time P. Yes once besides and it was the best and comfortablest Sermon that ever I heard J. Dost thou remember any of it P. Yes though I have a bad memory yet I remember thou didst say If a man had a hundred sheep and did lose one of them he would leave the ninety and nine in the wildernesse and goe after that which was lost untill he finde it and when he had found it he layeth it on his shoulders rejoycing and when he commeth home he calleth together his friends and neighbours saying unto them rejoyce with me for I have found my sheep that was lost J. Is that all thou dost remember P. No I remember somewhat more that thou didst speake of a woman that had ten pieces of silver and when she had lost one piece she sought for it till she had found it and then called her neighbours together to rejoyce with her Also thou spakest of a man that had two sonnes the one that lived still at home and was obedient to his father the other that went away from his father and spent his fathers means among harlots till he came to poverty and yet when he returned to his father his father did receive him willingly and made him great welcome and entertainment J. Well done my friend thou hast well remembred but dost thou know why I spake these comparisons P. No Sir I doe not well know that J. It was to comfort and encourage the Publicans and great sinners that did heare me and to silence the Jewes that did murmure because they came to beare me and because I received them P. It is true Lord there were many of us there then but we did not know what thou didst mean by the lost sheep the lost piece and the wicked son J. I did mean thy Country-men and companions the Publicans Harlots and Sinners that are in a lost condition because of your sinnes and wickednesse in the eyes of others as the Pharisees quite lost and adjudged to perish for ever P. But who was it Lord that did seeke for the lost sheep and the lost piece of silver J. It was I who am the Saviour of sinners and the Shepherd of the sheep that am come to seeke and to save that which is lost Luke 19 10. Matth. 18.11 P. Lord I am one of those that are lost what shall I doe to be saved Acts 16.31 J. I am the way and the doore if any man enter in he shall be saved and whosoever beleeveth on me shall not perish but have everlasting life Joh. 14.6 10.9 3.15.16 P. Lord canst thou save such a sinner as I am J. Yes I have power to save and power to destroy but I came not to destroy * Greek 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 the soules of men mens lives but to save them Jam. 4.12 Luk. 9.56 P. And art thou willing Lord that I should be saved J. Yes I am willing that all should be saved and come to the knowledge of the truth 1 Tim. 2.5 P. But Lord I am a wicked and a sinfull man Luk. 5.8 J. I know deare soule thou art so But I came not to call the righteous but sinners to repentance Matth. 9.13 P. But Lord I am not an ordinary but an extraordinary sinner J. Notwithstanding poore man hearken for thy comfort There was a certaine Creditor that had two debtors the one ought five hundred pence and the other fifty and when they had nothing to pay be frankly forgave them both Luk. 7.41.42 P. But Lord I am a greater sinner then either of them both for I have nothing but sinned all my life time J. What though I am come to deliver those that were all their life time subject to * Or the bondage of sin bondage Heb. 2.15 P. Lord be mercifull to me being a sinner for I thinke there is not a greater sinner upon earth then I am Luke 18.13 J. I am mercifull and I will bee mercifull and will pardon thy sins Jer. 3.12 Heb. 8.12 P. Lord I am such a sinner I deserve no pardon for I have wearied thee with my sins J. Though thou dost not deserve pardon and though thou hast wearied me with thy sins yet I will pardon thine iniquities for my owne names sake Esa 43.25 P. Lord I doe thinke my sinnes are so great that it is impossible for them to be pardoned J. Doe not thinke or say so for all things are possible to him that beleeveth Mark 9.23 P. But my sins are so red I think all the water in the sea cannot wash them away J. Though thy sins be as scarlet they shal be as white as snow and though they be red like crimson they shall be as wooll if thou wilt turne to me from them for my bloud can cleanse thee from all sin Esa 1.18 1 Ioh. 1.7 P. But Lord if I should turne to thee from them yet they are written downe and thou wilt not blot them out Ier. 18.23 J. I am be that blotteth out thy transgressions yea have blotted out as a thicke cloud thy transgressions and as a cloud thy sins returne therefore unto me for I have redeemed thee Esa 43.25 44.22 P. But if I should returne unto thee yet when I sinne againe thou wilt remember my sins J. No I will pardon thee and thy sins and iniquities will I remember no more Heb. 10.17 P. Oh Lord I am the childe of wicked parents and thou ha said thou wilt visit the sins of the fathers upon the children to the third and fourth generation J. If a wicked father begets a son that seeth all his fathers sins which he hath done and considereth and doth not such like that sonne shall not beare the iniquity of the father Ezek. 18.14.20 Ezek. 16.3 to the 13. P. But Lord were there any wicked parents that had good children J. Yes many as wicked (a) 2 Kin. 16.20 with 2 Kin. 18.3 Ahaz had good Hezekiah So (b) 2 King 21 21 22. with 2 Kin. 22.2 Idolatrous Amon zealous Iosiah and ungodly Saul had godly Ionathan P.
roare in (i) Luk. 3.17 Mark 9.43 44 46. flames of fire and in everlasting burnings Ph. I have joy and comfort in my spirit often from my performances and I know that God will heare my prayers that I make publickly and privately unto him J. Thou painted Sepulchre hast thou not read that the (k) Iob. 20.5 joy of an hypocrite is but for a moment and that an hypocrite shall not (l) Iob 13.16 come before God And dost thou not (m) Iob 15.4 restraine prayer before God and when thou prayest dost thou not doe it publickly to bee (n) Mat. 6.5 seen of men Ph. I pray in private also J. Then it is either when some (o) Esa 26.16 punishment is upon thee or else to quiet thy carnall conscience Ph. Mr. why dost thou reproach me in saying thus J. Thou dissembler that (p) Ioh. 5.44 seekest honour of men and not the honour which commeth from God thou art to expect nothing but shame and (q) Dan. 12.2 everlasting contempt Ph. Sir thou judgest rashly J. No as I heare I judge and my judgement is just and true Joh. 5.30 and 8.16.26 Ph. How knowest thou what I am that thou so judgest J. I am he that searcheth the heart and trieth the reines and I will give to every one of you according to your works Rev. 2.23 Ph. When thou judgest the world what difference wilt thou make between us that served God and the Heathens that served him not J. The difference will be this that your (r) Mat. 23.14 Mar. 12 40. Lu. 20.47 condemnation will be the greater because though ye knew God yet ye served him (s) Mat. 15.9 vainly falsely and (t) Esa 57.4 hypocritically Ph. Good Master I would escape this condemnation for I beleeve it will be great and thy words begin to terrifie mee already J. I have told thee already that there is no other way for thee to escape it but onely by me but yet thou dost not beleeve me Joh. 10.25 Ph. How wilt thou have me beleeve in thee J. First I will have thee see thy selfe to be the (v) 1 Tim. 1 15. greatest and vilest of sinners and then see all thy (u) Esa 64 6 owne righteousnesses services and performances to be as filthy and menstruous rags And after thou hast denied and (w) Eze. 36.31 abhorred thy selfe then cry out Master save me or else I perish for the (x) Mat 9.12 whole need not a Physitian but those that are sicke Ph. I doe see my selfe a sinner and I am sorry for my sinnes And doth not God say that whosoever confesseth and forsaketh his sins shall finde mercy J. I say unto thee thou luke-warme Professor Except thou eatest my flesh and drinkest my bloud and submittestunto my righteousnesse thou canst not be saved Joh. 6.53 Ph. Well then If I cannot be saved by my owne workes and righteousnesse Master let mee bee beholding to thee to save me J. Hast thou not read that (a) Psal 3.8 Salvation belongeth onely to the Lord and that men are saved by grace without the workes of the Law why then dost thou so (b) Deut. 32 15. lightly esteem of the Rocke of thy Salvation by seeking to be justified and saved as (c) Ro. 9 32. it were by thy owne workes I tell thee againe thou must (d) Phil. 3.9 deny thy owne righteousnesse wholly and looke to be found in my righteousnesse onely else thou canst not be saved Ph. Indeed Master thou makest the way to Heaven very hard J. It is so hard that many shall seeke to enter in and shall not bee able Luke 13.24 Ph. If it be as thou sayest I am afraid that many of our best Scribes and Pharisees will come short of Heaven J. Thou maist be sure of that for verily I say unto thee Except thy righteousnesse exceeds the righteousnesse of the Scribes and Pharisees thou shalt in no case enter into the Kingdome of Heaven Mat. 5.20 Ph. But Master there be some that doe great works in thy name shall not all such be saved J. No for many will say unto mee hereafter Lord Lord have we not prophesied in thy name and in thy name cast out devills and in thy name done many wonderfull things and then will I professe unto them I never knew you depart from mee yee workers of iniquity Matth. 7.22.23 Ph. But why should not such rather be saved then cast away J. Because they did as thou dost doe all these things to be seen of men and to gaine honour unto themselves and so built their Salvation upon this false foundation as the foolish builder built his house upon the sand which in (g) i.e. Times of triall and persecution Luke 8.12 time of flood and winds could not stand but fell Mat. 7.26 27. Ph. I see thou dost reject mee I thought to be one of thy Disciples and to follow thee J. No I doe not reject thee but am very willing to receive thee but first consider what thou dost and what it will cost thee if thou wilt be my Disciple and follow me Ph. What will it cost mee Master J. Thou must (h) i.e. In comparison of Christ when they come in competition with him Mat. 10.37 hate thy father and mother and wife and children and brethren and sisters and thine owne life also yea thou must goe and sell all that thou hast and take up thy crosse daily and follow mee else thou canst not bee my Disciple Luke 14.26 27. Ph. This is a hard saying who can hear it and he went away sorrowfull and followed him no more Joh. 6.60.66 Mat. 19.22 The third Dialogue between Christ and a Doubting Beleever Christ COme unto me al ye that labour and are heavy laden and I will give you rest Mat. 11.28 Beleever Oh Lord I am a poor heavy laden sinner that would come unto thee but cannot come Ch It is true O soule no man can come unto me except the Father which hath sent me draw him Joh. 6.44 Bel. How then Lord shall I come unto thee Ch I and my Father are one and we give power to the faint and to them that have no might we adde strength Or increase Joh. 10.30 Esay 40 29. Bel Lord I am altogether without strength therefore draw mee unto thee and I will come Ch I will draw thee unto mee with the cords of a man with bands of love and with loving kindnesse Hos 11 4. Ier. 31.3 Ioh. 12.32 Bel But Lord now I looke upon my selfe I see I am unworthy to come unto thee yea unworthy of the least of thy mercies Ch So said my servant (a) Mat. 3 11.6 Iohn the Baptist and (b) Gen 32.10 Iacob and (c) Luk. 7.7 Mat. 8.8 others yet do not judge thy selfe as the (d) Acts 13.46 Jewes did unworthy of eternal life Bel If such men as John Baptist and Jacob did judge themselves unworthy how
in loving kindnesse and mercy B. But Lord I have not only sin'd against thy mercies but against thy corrections and chastisements also C. So did my people Israel formerly doe Esa 57.17 18. for when I smote them they went on frowardly in the way of their evill heart but I lead them and restor'd comforts to them B. I bui my condition is worse the n all that for I have been long unde r the means of grace and yet I am altogether fruitlesse and like the barren Fig-tree C Thou troubled soule in me is thy fruit found Joh. 15.5 Psal 92.12 13 14. and I will purge thee and thou shalt bring forth fruit abundantly for they that are planted in my house shall flourish and be fat and like a green Olive Tree B. I Lord its true if J were a branch in thee and a true member of thy house then I could beleeve these promises of thine alas I am neither of both but separated from thee and thy people C. Do not say that thou art none of mine for I have bought thee with my blond and do not speak that thou art separated from my people Esa 56.3.5 for I will give thee in mine house and within my walls a place and a name better then the name of Sons and Daughters B. Sure if I were not an out-cast and a Reprobate I should not be thus as I am in a wildernesse condition C Israel was accounted an out-cast and she cried out Jer. 30.16.17 22. yet I was then a God to her and she a people to me B. Oh if I were but one of thine I should then count my selfe the happiest in all the world C. Feare not my Spouse for I am thy Husband and thy Father B. If I were one of thy Children thou wouldst not hide thy selfe from me as thou dost C. I have hid my selfe and my face from some of my Prophets and people of old and yet it was in love to them and so it is to thee Psal 88.14 Esa 8.17 64.7 B. But thou hast hid thy selfe from me and thou seemest also to be angry with me Esa 54.5 Jer. 31.9 C. Fury is not in me towards thee and though I be angry yet my anger is but for a moment Esa 27.4 54.8 B. Yet Lord thou hast been angry with me a long time for thou hast for gotten me C. Zion did say so the Lord hath forsaken me and my Lord hath forgotten me yet I had not forgot her for she was graven upon the palmes of my hands Esa 49.14 15. Ier. 51.5 B. But Lord if thou had'st not forgotten me thou would'st never have left me in such a wildernesse and barren condition as I am in C. I have allured thee into the wildernesse that I might speak comfortably unto thee Hos 2.14 B. I have been may years in trouble and terrours and wanting peace in my soule which could not possibly have been if I had truly beleeved in thee C. But now will I speak peace unto thee and I will guide thee into the way of peace Psal 85.8 Luk. 1.79 B. How Lord wilt thou speak peace unto me i. e. The Prea chers Lips that preacht peace and guide me into the way of peace C. I will create the fruit of the lips Peace Peace and my spirit shall be in thee and his fruit shall be peace to thy soule Esa 57 19. 55.12 B. But Lord thy word saith there is no peace to the wicked C. No not to a man that will persist in his wicked way and doth not nor will not beleeve in me but thou art one of those that I bore the chastizement of thy peace and one of the Children of peace Esa 53.5 54.13 B. But Lord how can I have peace seeing a man cannot have peace before and without he does beleeve C. Thou shalt have faith and peace and I will give peace through beleeving 2. Thes 3.16.6 B. But Lord then J must know that I am one of thine C. Thou shalt know that I am the Lord thy God and that thou art one of my people Ezek. 34.30 B. Oh how shall I know that C. My spirit shall beare witnesse with thy spirit that thou art my Child Rom. 8.16 B. But how shall I know that it is thy spirit that beareth this witnesse and that it is not the spirit of delusion C. Thou maist know that by its power in working in thy heart which no other spirit can work alike as also by the earnest and fruits there of 2 Cor. 5.5 7.22 Gal. 5.22 23. B. Lord what else shall I beleeve besides being one of thine C. Dost thou beleeve that B. Yes Lord J do beleeve that thou art Iesus the Son of God and the Saviour of the world Act. 8 37. Joh. 6.69 11.27 C. But dost thou beleeve that I am thy Saviour B. Lord I do beleeve that there is no other way to be saved but only by thee Act. 4.12 C. But dost thou beleeve that thou shalt be saved by me B. Lord I do beleeve help my unbeliefe Mark 9.24 C. To thee it is given to beleeve Phil. 1.29 B. Now Lord I doe beleeve C. What dost thou now beleeve B. I beleeve that thou loved'st me and did'st give thy selfe for me and that thou art my Lord and my God and that I am justified and shall be saved by grace Gal. 2.20 Joh. 20.28 Act. 15.11 C. How cam'st thou tobeleeve this B. Lord it is by thy gift and work that J do beleeve it Eph. 2.8 Heb 12.2 C. Well now thou dost beleeve what wilt thou do B. Lord what wilt thou have me to do Act. 9.6 C. If thou love me keep my words Ioh. 14.23 B. What are those words of thine C. Search the Scriptures for they are able to make thee perfect and wise unto salvation and to furnish thee for every good work Ioh. 5.39.2 Tim. 3.16.17 B. But Lord how shall I understand thy word C. I will make known my words unto thee Pro. 1.23 B. But Lord is there no danger of my departing and falling away from thee now I do beleeve C. No the Mountaines shall depart and the Hills be removed but my loving kindnesse shall not depart from thee Esa 54.10 Ier. 32.40 B. Lord I will keep thy precepts with my whole heart Psal 119 69. C. I have redeemed thee that thou should'st serve me without feare in Holinesse and Righteousnesse all the dayes of thy life Luk. 1.69 B. Come ye Children and I will declare what my Lord hath don for my soule My SOVLE shall make her boasts of the LORD the humble shall be are this and be glad and magnifie the LORD with me and let us Exalt his Name together Psal 34.11.2 3. FINIS