the seventh day will scarce rest that seventh day unto God without distraction as seems to be suggested to us by those words Six daies shalt thou labour being put into the fourth Commandement much less will he be able to allow himself constantly more time in a week than a seventh day comes to to wit some part of every day and a considerable part besides of one of the six daies which is to be his fast to the service of God I would therefore have every man not to incumber himself in this world more than he needs must We should learn to know when we have enough and allow our selves some part of our time to enjoy as well as all to get But this is preparation very far off The first act of more immediate preparation for these my fasting daies will be prudently to contrive upon foresight and consideration of my weeks business what day or daies they are in which I can best spare time for this work and those daies or that day will be the fittest to be pitched upon in which I may the most freely converse with God without the disturbance which much business necessarily brings Besides the time spent in my ordinacy course of devotions which are not upon my fasts to be omitted under pretence of making amends for them or running them up into my penitentiary performances I cannot upon those daies when I allow least allow less than two hours and upwards to the peculiar work of my fasts So much time therefore at the least I say I must resolve such a day to devote Which being resolved upon it will be sit as a second act of my more immediate preparation in the devotions of the evening before to spend a petition or two in my prayers to God that he would by his gracious Spirit prepare me for the work which I intend the next day softning my heart and giving me to understand my errours that I may duely â—â—ment them and truly amend them which petitions I may easily see a fit place to insert in my prayers And the day being come unto my morning devotions it will be expedient to add some such short prayer as this which follows O Lord who sees the purposes of all hearts and hast been privy to the intentions of thy servant touching calling himself this day to an account of his waies and humbling himself before thee for all his transgressions Be thou in mercy present to me by the preventings and assistance of thy grace that I may with a true heart and contrite spirit perform what I intend Grant that no worldly cares or business may so take off my mind from thee but that I may be able forthwith to return and without distraction to employ my whole soul in my designed devotions to the glory of thy Name my own amendment and comfort here and everlasting blessedness hereafter in and through thy Son Jesus Christ my Lord Amen And lastly my morning devotions being thus finished untill the time come that I have resolved to retire I must endeavour to converse and behave my self in my ordinary affairs so warily as that nothing may discompose disorder or disturb me no worldly design too much possess my thoughts according as above I have prayed Chap. VI. The order of Humiliation or Renitentiary Devotions Sect. 1. The entrance unto the work THat time being now come which I appointed to spend with God in my Closet I must religiously observe mine appointment For albeit the resolve was onely private and never proceeded without my own breast or closet yet hath God taken notice of it and it stands on record in his omniscience and by breaking these my private and as happily I may judge less material resolutions I shall soon learn to break my word and vows too in other matters both with God and man Coming therefore at my time appointed into my Closet I reverently kneel down before God and having the sense of his presence and all-seeing eye upon mine heart humbly begin in some such short prayer as is this which follows I Am come O Lord into thy presence upon work which no one hath more need to do than my self to consider my wayes and repent of my sins and turn to thee But I have an hard heart not apt to relent and dry eyes such at least which seldom shed tears for my sins O that thou would'st bow the Heavens and come down and melt my soul that it might kindly flow forth before thee in godly sorrow which might work repentance not to be repented of Open mine eyes and help me to see into mine heart Bâ—ing my sins to my remembrance and set them in order before me that an holy shame and confusion may cover my face for them and thou beholding my contrition maist accept it and both pardon me and assist me hereafter by thy grace that I may live more godlily righteously and soberly in this present world and attain unto blessedness with thy self in the world to come through the merits of Christ Jesus my Lord and Saviour Amen Sect. 2. Of Reading so as to fit my self for self-examination SOme such supplication being with aâ—l my heart made unto God I may haply find it not to be alwayes the best course forthwiâ—h to fall upon the examinaâ—ion of my self For for this I shall be the fitter when awakened and made more attentive to my self by some other exercise It may be proper therefore to spend and hour in the reading some honest practical Book which treateth severally of those duties which we owe both to God others and our selves to wit upon that particular Book which knowing to be very good I have chosen and singled out to my self to read and practice such as are the never enough commended Doctor Hammond's Practical Catechisme or if that seem to any too difficult that excellent Book The whole Duty â—f Man And in reading hereof I must endeavour to read First with understanding so that it is not so much the repeating to my self the words as considering and digesting the substance of them which I must account reading of them I must therefore read and study the Book as Schollars do their Books and if there be any material thing which I do not understand mark it so that I may inform my self by advising with some more able person than my self Secondly I must read all with application to my self remembring that all this concerns me and endeavouring to see how it concerns me whether I perform the duty I read of as I should or how I neglect it c. By this means taking upon every of my fasting dayes a part my Book will in convenient season be read over which when it is it must not be thrown aside but read through again and again with the same diligence till I am perfect in it Nor ought the third or fourth reading of a good profitable and practical Treatise to be tedious or unpleasant to me for that Christian duties
have invited and lead me to repentance 3. Gods judgments and heavy hand many times upon me which should have taught me righteousness 4. Had I no hinderances in the way which I broke through It may be Gods holy providence cast somewhat in which did a while retard my commission of the sin and if I had not been lesperately bent upon it might have diverted me and dasht the temptation 4. Was not I the tempter and Devil to my self in them Did not I set my self on work without Saâ—ans incitation of me thereto 5. Whether or no have not many of them been publickly dishonourable to God and scandalous to my Christian profession Hath not mine example if not mine enticements drawn in others to the same sin or driven others out of conceit with Religion Wretched man that I am that I should so hold perhaps teach the faith as to make infidels Lastly Something of grievousness the circumstances of time and Place c. may add thereto which ought not to be overlooked Through such heads as these should I trace my sins especially those of them which are most gross and in my Meditations dwell so upon these considerations as may if possible move my sorrow at least breed an utter â—aversion of the sin and a loathing of my self for it And if it be so that I cannot shed tears and really mourn over my sins yet if I can find in my self a through displeasure with my self for sin and an hatred of it together with an earnest desire to be freed from the habit and power of the sin as well as from the guilt of it this I may conclude to be a sorrow of mind and ought therefore to cherish in my soul Sect. 5. Of Repentance which is the effect of godly sorrow its true nature and way of practice THe Apostle saith Godly sorrow workith repentance which need not to be repented of Now that repentance may seem to consist of two things Of a full purpose of heart to forsake sin and of hearty endeavours against it First I say I may not think I have repented of my sin till I have taken up a full purpose and resolution of mind against it for the future As long as there is in me any intention of returning to it again I am an impenitent wretch Now such purpose and resolution the foregoing consideration of my sin is apt to beget and therefore by laying such thoughts truly home unto mine heart by employing my mind much on them I ought to endeavour to work my self up to such resolution and never to sit down contented or think my self penitent till I am so wrought upon I shall not much need to be minded that during such endeavours I ought to intermix with my meditations frequent petitions to Almighty God whose Grace onely it is which is sufficient for me for the turning my heart from sin Now purposes and resolutions are rotten except endeavours to fulfil them follow This therefore is the second part of repentance that as I have resolved so I endeavour against sin And this endeavour against sin seems to have two parts the one of which may best be acted in my Closet the other must be acted any where and every where The first part of the endeavour against sin is to do what we can to mortifie the habit that is the inclination readiness and customary proneness which we have to the sin which is to be forsaken And that must be done 1. By considering with my self what means or remedies I can find out against that sin Certain it is the more I can restrain or keep back my self from the actual commission or doing of any sin the more will the power of that sin decay in me the less inclined shall I be thereto Wherefore if I cannot at the first root out the habit or overcome that miserable inclinedness which I find thereto yet let me endeavour to find out such means which may keep me from the acting the sin and I say that customary proneness unto the sin will by the grace of God decay Now in general it will be a true and proper remedy against any sin to consider the occasions or inducements which chieflly lead me thereunto and to provide as well as I can against them Whether or no is it a sin which is deeply rooted in my nature and constitution or whether or no is it such an one which by my way of living converse and custome I have settled in my self If it be of the latter sort the breaking my self of that custome the altering as far as is possible such converse as hath brought me into it is a very good remedy against it But if it be a sin innate and after a sort planted in my very make and complexion it is more difficult to subdue But the way will be 1. To take such course with my self as that for the future I may keep my self from the acting of it as much as may be And 2. To make it a constant petition in my daily prayers to God that he by that Spirit by which he is able to subdue all things unto himself would mortifie in me the affection and lust which I have after that sin And by persevering in such course no doubt but at length through the divine Grace I shall overcome it These means therefore having consulted of attending to my particular sin the next step which I am to take in the mortifying of it is 2. To resolve there before God diligently to use those means which I have particularly consulted of and so forthwith to order and contrive all my affairs as far as in me lies that I may without any partiality use them all according to the best of my skill and in the most effectual manner that I know The second part of the endeavour against sin which will not be so much the work of my Closet as of my life is diligence in the using of these means which I have thus considered of found out and resolved upon whereever I am and when soever I have opportunity Now that I may so do it will very much help if I write down these resolutions before God in my privacy which I am to do in mine Accomptal where also I am to record every dayes fasting and the issue thereof what I found new in mine estate what I resolved on what means I considered of against such and such sins We find they not onely made a Covenant but put it in writing and sealed it before the Lord in their solemn Fast Nehem. 9. 38. This will be one way to secure me against being slighty in my Penitentials and it may besides much both confirm and quicken me in my execution of these my resolves to read them over written by my mine own hand before God And being thus registred it will be good for me to be often when I come into my Closet about my devotions and examine my self looking on and reading them over least
through Christ according to the promise of the Gospel that I doing thus my sins shall not be laid to my charge as being taken away by the cross of Christ in whose merits I have through this my faith and the mercy of God to me a share Sect. 9. Of Prayer upon such Fasting dayes THat which will much heighten my affection in this my repentance and further complete all its parts yet remains to wit prayer which as it must on this occasion and day be more large and particular than ordinary so I cannot now want matter for it after such consideration of my condition and of the way how I am to seek for pardon of sin as is supposed if the former rules have been observed to have foregone particularly I am to frame my prayers or at least to alter them as neer as I can to my condition 1. Confessing my several sins and that not without those aggravating circumstances in which I formerly considered them 2. Representing before God my sorrow my resolution of heart against them 3. Begging his grace to assist me in the fulfilling my godly purposes and pardon for all my sins whether known and confessed or as yet unknown to me To these heads my Christian discretion may add more according to my particular condition To wit if any judgment rest on me or mine or is feared by reason of these my sins I may implore deliverance from it If any mercy is expected or by me aimed at which I fear my sins may most justly hinder or blast I may importune God for the granting it or otherwise apply my self as occasion serves Now as to the form or outward manner of my prayer if I am able to pray otherwise I shall not haply on these occasions see it alwaies fit or convenient to use set or composed forms for that there may be many particular affecting circumstances of my sins which no form will express so plainly as I have need to express them for the moving my sorrow If therefore I find my heart ready and so composed that I dare venture upon what we call a conceived prayer which being of mine own invention by the assistance of the Spirit may more perfectly suit with my condition in all than one framed by another to my hand having either noted in a paper before me the substance or matter of my Confessions Petitions and Thanksgiving which paper for memories sake I lay before me when I kneel down to prayer oâ— else so considered of as that it will be ready I may spend a few thoughts touching the particular expressions by which I intend to represent this my mind to God To this purpose these two practices may be helpfull 1. To read any part of the woâ—d of God which being I dayly read some of it I may know to be suitable to my present case If I find mine heart hard let me read some affecting working place Such I may be presumed to have noted as I have read in my course If I find it tender let me read such place or places as may nourish this tenderness or raise me to to an holy joy and delight in God and these duties which I perform to him And in like manner in other cases 2. To recall and consider such fit expressions of the particular materials which I am to set forth before God as I may be presumed to have observed and treasured up in my memory or book in my ordinary course of reading After such premeditation with an holy fear I am to endeavour to pour out my inward conceptions before God as fitly and as fervently as I can But I must not think that fervency lies in loud speaking but in the inward affection of the soul notwithstanding if my closet be so situate that I may judge I cannot be heard without I may many times find that it will conduce if not to the affecting me more yet to the keeping my mind more close to my business for me to speak in a voice exceeding a private whisper But let me be never so able a person and my heart never so fixt to use a form so far as where occasion shall serve to leave it a while to wit where I would confess or ask more particularly may keep my prayers from being loose imperfect broken and disorderly and consequently make my devotions riper Now such an one is this which followes O Thou Great Holy and Fearful God unto whom all things are naked and open and before whom as being of purer eyes than to behold iniquity nothing that is unrighteous shall stand I even blush and dread to appear before thee For in me there is nothing but iniquity that thou canst behold Iniquity indeed is too soft a word I am nothing but filth I have sinned against Heaven and before thee and am so far unworthy of being called thy son that I am not fit to be called thy servant but deserve rather as a rebell as a faithless and treacherous wretch against thy Majesty to be destroyed of the Destroyer to have all thy wrath and plagues to meet in me and to be made unto the world an example of thy severity and revenging justice that by me men might learn no more to presume and backslide But there is mercy with thee O Lord that thou mayest be feared and sought unto Nor hast thou as thou hast protested any pleasure in the death of sinners but art so desirous that they might return and be healed that thou hast not spared thy very onely begotten Son but hast given him to seek and by death it self to save the lost sons of men promising that of all those who through him come home unto thee thou wilt by no means cast off any I come O Lord at least I have here set my self in the way to come and bewail my departures And let not my Lord be angry and I will consess I have O God a most corrupt nature and heart full of impurities and abominable things as a cage of unclean birds She was innocent in comparison of me out of whom came but seven devils I may most truly stile my self Legion such swarmes of lusts do possess me The Wheresoever in this prayer the mark †is found the Reader must not forgot to consider particularly touching those expressions whether they fit his condition lusts of the flesh †Intemperance Idleness Uncleanness the lusts of the eyes †Covetousness Envy the Pride of life †conceitedness of my self Ambition and proud Wrath are things familiar to me rooted and grounded in my heart And that truly Lord not so much by nature as by continued custome and wicked practice I have my self made my soul more depraved than I ever received it from corrupt nature That I am dull and heartless in the performance of all holy duties that I am vigorous and active in the serving my lusts and pleasures and the fulfilling the desires of my flesh and mind that I am vain heedless and
commonly void of thy fear in all my wayes I owe very much unto my own vitious conversation unto my giving my self up to walk in my own wayes unto my choosing vanity and addicting my self thereto unto my either total neglect or slighty discharge of thy worship Impossible in a manner it is that any one who lives as I have done should have a better heart than I have And at this rate O Lord have I ever lived My childhood the innocentest part of my life was a state of necessary ignorance of thee yet even herein how soon did the accursed fruits of inborn lusts begin to shew themselves My youth what was it but a vain and brutish a mad and sensual age As to that small notice which therein I had of thy will and nature how little credit did I give unto it and how ineffectual was it upon me either to the quickening me to my duty or restraining me from any wickedness But as to my riper years O Lord I know not what to say I should in truth sit down astonished before thee but that I want a due sense of my sinfulnesse Mine iniquities are gone over my head That they are greater than I can bear is little they are greater than I can comprehend or number Nay if I should let pass my sins of ignorance of infirmity of heedlesness and inadvertency by which notwithstanding I seriously acknowledge my self times without number to have dishonoured and provoked thee If I should insist only upon my knowing presumptious and wilful sins even these O Lord it were impossible for me to reckon up For besides that vast number of them which I cannot call to mind all which notwithstanding are upon record before thee what a black and tedious Catalogue of them have I here open or which I can spread before thee How many wilful neglects yea even contempts of my duty How many resolute perpetrations of horrid crimes such which I now am ashamed even to think of yet did not then blush to commit sins the heinousness whereof being considered if I could do nothing else but mourn over them all my dayes though I should weep as my Saviour sweat in bloud under unknown agonies I could not but account my self impenitent Nay had I onely that one sin of ** so often by me repeated to bewail what sorrow could suffice for its due lamentation Here are to be mentioned thy chiefest and most frequent sin or sins But if I add hereunto my ** my ** c. what reason have I were my fasts confessions prayers and teares a thousand fold to what they are or can be to sit down and lament my notorious impenitence And besides this weight of guilt which the heinous nature of my sins themselves load me with what a sad additional pressure do their dismal aggravations bring What circumstance almost can there be that makes sin grievous which I may not find in most of mine It is but an ordinary aggravation of my sins that they have been committed against knowledge that I have held thy truth in unrighteousnesse and being convinced of my duty have both neglected it and done contrary unto it †The very instant dictates of conscience protesting against the sins which I have been about to commit the smitings of mine own heart not onely after and before but amidst the very commission of them have not restrained my head-strong will †Nay O Lord hath not the voice of thy Spirit joyned with the voice of my Conscience and the united perswasions of both striven with me but all in vain †Have I not known that if I would resist through thy grace I should overcome And might I not through the same grace have resisted if I would †Have not I at the very same time thought of thy wrath and eternal flames belonging to those who do such things and yet this in vain too And besides the vow of my Baptisme which I have owned and acknowledged my self to stand bound by Ah! Lord have I not made many a particular vow against those very sins which after as a Dog to his vomit I have returned to And †those vows brought to thy Table and sealed in the Bloud of thy Son Have not I tasted thy mercies encouraging mine obedience and on the contrary sometimes wrung out almost the drâ—gs of thy wrath in punishment of my backslidings Further hast not thou many a time hindred me in my prosecution of these sins and by some interposing providence dulled the temptation which I lay under towards them †When yet I have proved so far a Divel to my self as to retrieve the temptation and over-bearing the voice of my conscience the resistance of thy Spirit breaking through all engagements to obedience which either thou or my self have laid upon me yea and the very hindrances and lets which have been put in my way against those sins I have returned to the attempts and practices of them Ah Lord what can such a sinner be fit for but destruction And yet after this sort how long have I lived sinning And how have I hardened my heart against all those means which thou hast used for my betterment Besides How many of these my sins have been committed openly and in the sight of the Sun to the dishonour of thee and to the scandal of others who beholding my practices have blasphemed at least been provoked to blaspheme and speak evil of Christianity All this O Lord is but my old wickedness I have later and †therefore if possible some of them more grievous sins to confess unto thee It is but such or such a time or day that I ** Here mention later falls Ah! how can I lift up my face or look towards thee my so oft offended God! And yet notwithstanding all this I have not yet done O Lord. For besides these sins of mine own what a multitude of the sins of other men do I stand accessary unto and guilty of How many for ought I know have I undone by my example What a multitude is there for whose profaneness and unbelief being occasioned by the scandal against Religion which my looseness hath possest them with I am to answer for †Some there are whom I have more directly and nearly corrupted And how many more may they have corrupted who haply had not been in that case corrupt themselves had not I propagated such sins to them Ah! wretched man that I am who have not been so far innocent as to be wicked alone and destroy no more than my self And now O Lord after I have confessed thus much notwithstanding all which I have confessed and much more which I am not able to express nor so much as my self to know what an hard unbroken and stupid heart have I The truth is the multitude and grievousness of my sins is such as is enough to make me impenitent and desperate upon the meer sight of them †I may well doubt whether it be
possible that such a backsliding wretch as my self should ever be renewed again unto repentance or thereby restored But forasmuch as I understand that to turn thus desperate and to neglect repentance and amendment of life would be worse than all the wickedness which I have hitherto wrought I am here prostrate before thee to bewail my self and with sorrow and grief of heart for my former wayes do I here cast my self upon thee If thou wilt have mercy thou canst still save me If thou wilt not Lord I perish But doest thou use to suffer those to perish who thus with such repentance as they can submit and humble themselves at thy footstool crying unto thee for help Far be it from thee thou Father of Mercies Notwithstanding inasmuch as I being much worse than ordinary sinners do more justly deserve to find no place for repentance and have therefore more reason to fear how thou maist deal with me deal with me as thou wilt †through thy grace I will sin no more no more knowingly and presumptuously as I have done And to that end I have here in thy presence this day considered my wayes †I have endeavoured to find out those wiles and methods by which the Devil and mine own lusts have ensnared me in such grievous sins †I have resolved upon impartial diligence as well in my endeavours against these particular evils as against all other and in performing unto thee hearty and intire obedience These Resolutions I here humbly present before thee sacredly engaging my self to do my utmost to keep them and beseeching thee by thy grace to engage my heart more firmly to them And Lord let not any dulness or want of that affection with which I ought to have confessed my sins to have bewailed my guilt and to have passed these resolutions hinder that this my serious humiliation of my self should not be accepted before thee Such contrition as thou hast enabled me to I have endeavoured sorrowing that I am not more deeply humbled Such which is wanting do thou bestow For it is no less thy property to bestow than to accept the contrite heart The broken spirit is O Lord from thee When thou of old commandedst water out of the flinty Rock it forthwith yielded obedient streams nor can my heart dry and hard as it is but dissolve into holy tears if thou wilt bid it melt Give forth then the word O God Speak thy servant is here ready to hear Turn thou me and I shall be turned Send out thy good Spirit let it inlighten the eyes of my mind in the knowledge both of my self and thee let it savingly perswade me of the truth of all that thou hast spoken and especially of the defiling cursed and damning nature of sin of the sufficiency and efficacy of the merits of Christ Jesus unto all those who by a right faith apply themselves to thee through him I do O Lord believe help my unbelief And grant that this sight and perswasion both of my sin and Saviour may affect mine heart so that I may sorrow after a godly sort and that sorrow may bring forth in me those wholesome fruits which after all my endeavours of repentance I cannot but lament to be much wanting in me to wit carefulness against sin vehement desire and zeal of holiness indignation and an holy revenge against my self by all which I may for the future clear my self and ever approve mine heart honest upright and sincere before thee Suffer not this my righteousness to be onely as a morning cloud or early dew soon passing away but let thy grace alwayes dwelling in me keep open in my soul an ever flowing fountain of such penitence that I may go on thus mourning to mourn over my sins and perfecting holiness in thy fear accounting all little enough if so be I may but in the end obtain mercy And this my penitent return at least hearty endeavour of such return accompanied with persevering study of impartial obedience to thee do thou however most unworthy in it self through the perfect merits of thy Son accept washing away all my sins both the iniquities of my youth and transgressions of my riper years as well known as unknown especially Here mention thy chiefest sin or sins my ** in his bloud and reckoning according to thy gracious Covenant this my faith which by such works as these shall discover it self to be alive and true unto me for righteousness And if thine infinite Wisdome shall see it to be good for me do thou grant me this further happiness that I thus living in thy fear may be ever filled with peace and joy through a comfortable assurance of thy favour and hopes of eternal glory As to all my outward affaires by thy good providence be thou pleased so to overrule all events that whatsoever befals me may work together to me for good My sins indeed O Lord deserve quite contrary even the severest inflictions of thy wrath and fiery displeasure And I do most seriously acknowledge that in all the judgments which thou hast at any time laid upon me thou hast used much mercy All the paines which my body hath felt all the losses which have impaired my estate all the slanders which have blasted my name particularly ** I embrace as infinitely less than my deserts That †I am in any straits ** that I Here mention any particular afflictions suffer otherwise in my body relations c. ** were all a thousand sold to what it is I should confess it to be most just Were I to enjoy no more good than I do deserve I should have just nothing Righteous therefore art thou O Lord when I plead with thee Yet if thou wilt be intreated by thy repenting servant to †withdraw * These and such like expressions are to be used according to persons particular conditions or withhold thy hand to remove the punishment I feel or not to inflict the punishments which I fear but through the bloud of Christ to deliver me from thy present wrath as well as from the wrath to come thy servant shall ever bless and praise thee and be able to serve thee with more chearful diligence However Lord thy Will be done Bring me surely to thy self let it be by what means thou wilt Please thy self thy servant will endeavour to be content Deny me what things thou wilt onely deny me not Grace Pardon and thy Self And not onely upon me O Lord but upon all men do thou have mercy according to the gracious pleasure of thine own most holy Will Especially upon the universal Church Enlarge thou its bounds provide for its safety and purity delivering any part of it which is in danger and reforming whatsoever of it is corrupted Do thou with all suitable mercies bless this particular Church Forgive the publick sinnes ** Heal the publick Here mention such sins or calamities Calamities ** Preserve and every way be gracious unto
ever I intend for happinesse Again Reading Exodus 32. I find that Moses took the Calfe they had made and burned it is the fire and grownd it to powder Hoâ— the burning gold in the fire which onely purifies it ordinarily should come to make it friable or brittle that it might be grownd unto powder I need not stand to inquire A shorter and better way it is to believe the matter feasible and this relation true as being part of Gods word all I need to conclude thence is that Idolatry is to be destroyed and that in such sort as the people may not return to it again but rather loath and abominate it as we do that which passeth through our bodies and that it is the wisdom of Magistrates whom it concerns to destroy it as it was Moses's to find out and contrive such waies or Methods of destroying it This is I say as much as can concern any ordinary person and as for the curiosity touched it may safely be neglected We give not rules to make a Divine but to direct a Christian Now all such difficulties and curiosities being left out I presume the difficulties which arise in practicable matters will be but few And for my help herein it will be meet I reflect upon that which according to the former rule I found to be the scope or drift of that Scripture and consider the difficulty with some relation or regard thereto observing the occasion upon which that expression came in This will help me very much many times But for my further help therein if I am able it would be expedient I had some short glosse or book explaining such matters and truly what book to pitch upon as best in this case is not easy to resolve For I suppose there are not many books of notes or commentaries upon the whole Bible in English which meddle onely with necessary and practicable matters omitting controversals which a private Christian to his better edification may well spare For the New Testament I much admire Dr. Hammons Paraphrase and could ten thousand times wish such a piece were extant upon the whole But yet it is too difficult for every plain reader Bishop Hall hath a Paraphrase upon the whole Bible which comes much necrer to our present designe But I fear this is scarce The frequentest best and innocentest that I know is Diodates Annotations they have indeed a Geneva tang now and then but pretty soberly Some such book according as I can gett I would furnish my self with which I might consult touching the meaning of such difficult places as my Christian direction should tell me to be practicall and for my necessary edification Thirdly Having thus found out the design of that whole portion of Scripture which I have read and the meaning of such particular Texts as I shall have occasion to search into let me in my meditations cast over again or recollect the substance of it and consider what am I the better for the reading hereof 1. Am I instructed or further confirmed in any matter of faith 2. Am I taught any duty which before I either was ignorant of or neglected Do I here find any precept or command which I never before took notice of or had forgot c 3. Is there any thing which may quicken me to any duty in which I am slack or deter me from any sin to which I am prone Any threatning of Gods wrath Any example of his judgments Any promise of mercy Any instance of blessings on his diligent servants 4. Is there any thing which may strengthen me in any temptation comfort me in any affliction distrust c. 5. Is there any particular emphatical or affectionate speech which may at any time quicken me Any proper petition confession invocation thanksgiving or the like which may be of use to me in prayer or otherwise 6. Is there any thing which I can observe of the experiences of holy men of old any thing of the deceitfulness of sin c. Through such heads as these may my meditations briefly run which heads till I am perfect in it may not be amiss to open this my book and examine what I have read according to these directions laid down And if I am able I shall find it an incredible benefit in the end of these my meditations to use my pen whensoever by any reading I have gained any more remarkable benefit and to register in one of my paper books reserved ever for this purpose which I may account my Memoriall that particular which I have gained in which I need to observe no other method but onely to write all the notes which I take out of any one book as of Matthew Mark c. together that so at my second or third reading that particular book over I may see what the second or third reading of it advantaged me more than the first And these notes thus taken because intended as helps to my memory I must be sure to find time within a convenient season to review This is a profitable course for me to observe in my ordinary meditations upon the Holy Scriptures The next thing which my meditations are to be imployed upon is upon my particular State and Waies which I am in some measure to take notice of as well that I may be more circumspect in such particulars wherein I shall find greater need of circumspection as that I may be able to address my self to God in a way suitable to my condition For my condition varying my prayers ought to vary accordingly First then As to my Waies Let me consider what new temptations have befallen me whether as to inward sins such which are acted in the mind or as to such which are matter of outward and bodily commission how far my heart hath closed with them and been overcome by them And this is to be laid open before God Secondly As to my present Inward state the temper of my mind Let me examine that whether I find any relentings or meltings of heart for those my wandrings which I have before viewed any firmness and resolution for the future against the like Accordingly I am to apply my self to God either for the giving me a due sense of and remorse for and resolution and watchfulness against my sin or for the heightning and strengthning those degrees hereof which I already have Thirdly As to my Outward state Let me consider how Gods holy providence hath either favoured or crossed my ordinary affairs and designes for accordingly still I am to address my self unto God in prayer either by praising him for my successes or bewailing those sins and omissions which I may judge have blasted them or otherwise as my Christian discretion shall suggest The last head upon which my meditations are to be imployed is my Prayers which I am now about to offer up unto God in which if I use a set form I am to consider where those new particulars of confession
〈◊〉 through my Saviour Christ Jesus in whose Name I further pray as by him taught when I pray to say Our Father c. Chap. X. A form of prayer made as the other which may be used in our Evening Privacy IN like manner the Christian having entred his Closet with some such ejaculatory or short prayer as before directed to and having read and meditated as in the morning may I presume very profitably use with such alteration as his condition shall require and his discretion direct the ensuing Prayer O Most Holy and Gracious Father the searcher of all hearts who seest my down-lying as well as up-rising darkness and light being both alike to thee who art near unto all my wayes and espiest my thoughts while they are yet afar off I have here set my self before thee to pay my evening homage and desire to present both my soul and body as is most due a living Sacrifice to thee my God who hast made and redeemed both But most unfit O Lord are they to be to thee presented every part of both being naturally corrupt and abominable and nothing in me free from the loathsome defilement of sin My soul is desperately wicked and all its powers perverse and bent upon evil My mind alienated from thee through the ignorance that is within me My affections unruly and masterless My will full of enmity to thy Law and enslaved to the service of divers lusts and pleasures And as to my body in iniquity O Lord was I shapen and in sin did my Mother conceive me And ever since have all my members been servants unto iniquity and instruments of wickedness With my whole man have I obeyed the law of sin and fulfilled the desires of my flesh and corrupt mind I scarce can think of that sin in which I have not had my hands one part of my time or other In sin O God have I spent not onely my vainer age and the days of my ignorance but my ripest years and those of fullest discretion which I have yet attain'd to Since the light of thy Gospel hath shone into my opened eys since thou hast touched my heart with a sense of that evil which there is in sin so wicked and perverse a servant have I been that knowing my Lords will I have both neglected to do accordingly and presumptuously done contrary unto it To the very present time O Lord how †frequently and how †sadly do I backslide What †liberty do I allow my self How †heedlesly do I converse I walk at a meer peradventure with thee my God Notwithstanding all my vows and promises of watchfulness unto obedience this very day how little hath thy fear been in my heart and from hence comes it to pass that I have so miserably departed from thee by ** * Here confess any of the miscarriages of the day which thou hast been supposed to have taken notice of in thy meditation With what stripes therefore do I deserve to be beaten And how righteous a quarrel against me hath not onely thy Justice but thy very Grace and Mercy Notwithstanding O Blessed Father give thy poor creature leave to beseech and let him prevail with thee not to take that advantage against him which justly thou mayest Rather now thou hast borne so long break my heart by this thy goodness and make thy forbearance and long-suffering to lead me to repentance Vouchsafe unto me thy sanctifying Spirit Let it fill me with an holy shame of my former wayes And let the sense of my own unworthiness towards thee beget in me an holy indignation against my self a passionate and constant zeal by future diligence as far as is possible to redeem and repair some of my lost and most sadly mis-spent time Let my heart be never void of a stedfast purpose of serving thee in the impartial performance of every known duty especially of *** and careful avoidance of every sin * Here put in any thing for which thou findest occasion And having thus given to will do thou of the same thy good pleasure give also to do following the preventions of thy Grace by the continual assistances thereof so that I may proceed from one virtue unto another perfecting holiness in thy fear and keeping a conscience void of offence towards thee and all men And this my cordial purpose and perseverance in endeavours of pleasing thee do thou through the bloud of my Saviour graciously accept laying not to my charge any of my former sins nor visiting upon me either the neglects or transgressions of my duty At least however thou shalt here deal with thy servant in the last day acquit him of all guilt and through the merits of thy Son let him obtain remission of his sin and an inheritance in thine everlasting Kingdom In the mean while as to the necessaries of this present life give thy servant what thou pleasest and what thou seest best for him even food convenient Thou needest not O God my service but accept my ambition of being serviceable unto thee and bless me both with strength and opportunities for it and if it may be thy holy will with success therein Father I pray unto thee also for all men forasmuch as thou art a God who wouldest have all to be saved and to come unto the knowledge of thy truth especially for all and every member and members of thy Universal Church and for the particular Church of this the Land of my nativity For the Kings Majesty the Queen and the whole Royal Family for all that are in authority for the several Stewards of thy Mysteries the Ministers of thy Gospel for him in particular to whose oversight thou hast committed me that thou wilt give unto them all according to thy most gracious pleasure the blessings both of this life and that which is to come especially such measures of thy Spirit that every shoulder may be fitted for its burden and all amongst us may faithfully serve thee according to their several degrees so that this whole Land may be blessed with abundance of prosperity and peace so long as the Sun and Moon endureth Forget not peculiarly to shew mercy unto the relations friends helpers and well-wishers of thy servant Reward I beseech thee all their love and forgive good Lord divert and put an end unto all others malice or enmity Let thine eyes be ever open upon and the bowels of thy compassion be moved towards all thy wanting and suffering servants Support them under and graciously deliver them out of all their distresses and let the end be peace and righteousness and blessedness for ever Thy servant will speak yet once more and praise thee for thine infinite love and compassion to that miserable nature of which he is a partaker in revealing to us when we had lost or corrupted it the knowledge of thy self both by the light of Nature and most clearly by thy holy Word in sending thy Son for our redemption
keep all his life as a perpetual Sabbatism Hebr. 4. 10. or holy rest unto God it must needs be an argument of a very profane worldly and unchristian spirit not to afford God this day free from sensual pleasures and worldly cares or labours Wherefore I say the keeping holy of the Lords day I put out of all question and would have no man flatter himself that he is a devout Christian who useth either by idleness or pleasures or unnecessary worldly business to profane what the Church and being that the Church hath done it by good warrant and power transmitted to her by Christ God himself hath allowed Profanation I call it for if the spending it to holy purposes be to sanctifie it then the spending it contrarily upon ordinary or unworthy practices is to profane it And if we may not give that which is holy unto dogs it is then surely most intolerable to take that time which by divine Law ought to be holy unto God and give it to his enemies the devil this world and our own lusts which we do when we spend the Lords day either in idleness pleasures or needless worldly matters Works of charity or mercy are acts of holiness and works of necessity so far forth as they are works of necessity are acts of mercy and consequently the doing of either of these that is works of Charity or Necessity when due occasion calls me thereto is rather sanctifying than unhallowing the Lords day especially if I do them out of duty towards God and in his fear and for this I have his warrant who tels Mat. 9. 13. me that he better accepts Mercy than Sacrifice Chap. VII Of Preparation for the Lords day A preparatory Prayer thereto SEeing then that the Lords day is to be kept holy that is to be spent in the worship and service of God for which it is set apart it concerns me to consider how I may spend it in a way most complying with this its design or intendment And I shall easily upon the very consideration of the nature of Gods worship be convinced that it is in a manner impossible for me duely to sanctifie it if I come unto it hot and wreaking from my worldly business For being I am to worship God in spirit and in truth with all my mind soul and strength and in a word with my whole man evident it is that I am unable so to do while my heart yet remains unemptied of the world and being unfit to worship God I am not while so in a due state to sanctifie this day Wherefore the right sanctification of the Lords day is to begin with Preparation And it is a right wholsome institution that upon the Evening before it there should be Prayers in every Parish Church which is grown now too much into disuse by reason onely that I can imagine of the degeneracy of the age If there be such custome kept up in my Parish I would not but upon necessity be absent from those preparatory prayers At which though I should be supposed to have been present yet would I not content my self therewith but whether I have been imployed publickly in preparations or not in my course of devotion on Saturday night take so much more time than I do ordinarily as might serve for some preparatory Meditations and Prayers The least which I can do to this purpose in my Meditations is First To examine whether there be not some sin or sad miscarriage of the week past which lies unrepented of and so may blast my next daies performances And if any there be secondly to consider of it more particularly its aggravations its nature whether it be not such an one part of the Repentance for which must be Reconciliation Restitution or somewhat like and accordingly to apply my self to what I in my conscience and in the fear of God do judge due repentance Thirdly to endeavour the emptying my head of worldly at least distracting cares to bid them be gone now till a day for them return And lastly so to contrive as neer as I can all my affairs for the next day that both I and my family may have as little avocations or matters to call away our minds from holy duties as may be This by way of Meditation My Prayers must be suitable to my condition If any such sin as before mentioned be found that must be confessed bewailed and pardon craved together with grace for the future against it which may be done by putting in the mention of that sin in the proper space left for such purpose But besides this it will be necessary to add some particular petitions for due preparation or disposition of heart for the duties of the next day First for a quiet setled and composed mind so that I may attend with all my soul my holy concerns or business Secondly for enlivened affections that I may not be dull and heartless but of a tender and melting spirit Thirdly for a pliable ductile yielding and easie mind that I may mix the word with faith and render the obedience of faith Lastly because both my own and the Congregations benefit and edification much depends upon the Ministers due and affectionate discharge of his office it is therefore fit I forget not him but commend him to the assistance of the Spirit To which purpose the following prayer may be either inserted in some fit place towards the end of my prayers or added to them O Lord from whom the preparations of the heart are The day now approacheth which being holy unto thee I am to spend in thy more solemn worship Many sins there are by me not duely repented of which may justly bring upon me a curse instead of a blessing Especially my * Here insert the mention of such particular sinnes which thou hast found thy self guilty of c. may make my very prayers an abomination to thee But accept thou I beseech thee of this my confession of them and at least desired sorrow for them Turn my heart from them for the future and through the bloud of my Saviour so remove the guilt of them that they may not hinder good things from me Let the effusions of thy grace both upon me and all the Congregations of thy people be plentifull Let my heart be fixed and none either vain or worldly thoughts lodge within me this night Quicken me by thy Holy Spirit that I may draw neer unto thee with a true heart and be fervent in Spirit in thy service and with a good and honest heart receiving thy word may understand and keep it and bring forth fruit with patience and unto perfection Remember thou thy servants who are to dispense thy Mysteries unto thy people and especially him upon whose teaching I am to wait Pardon their sins and frailties Open their mouths guide their minds and tongues that they may deliver thy truths in the demonstration of thy Spirit and let thy work so prosper
are not new but have been and alwayes will be the same and multitude of books do but confound plain heads All wise men know that to make a mans self master of one good book is better than to have slightly read an hundred which were not either throughly understood or digested To keep therefore thus to one good Book which may instruct me of the sum of my Christian duty till I have fully made it mine own is my most edisying course Sect. 3 Of Self-examination and the view of our life THis my Exercise of reading being over it will be seasonable now to fall to the examination of my self touching my sins And here I shall find a very good help of the former work of reading especially after some considerable use of it when I am once come to know my several duties for certain it is No man can see what he hath done amiss what he hath left undone which two heads of Omission and Commission contain under them all actual sins till he seeth what he should have done Now this duty of Self-examination a man may be supposed either to be a stranger in and little to have practised or else to have been much in it and to be throughly verst in his heart and life He who is a stranger to it hath unquestionably more work to do than the other That he may therefore do his business throughly he must begin with those very first years which he can remember and trace sin from his insancy through his youth to his riper and present years He must see what Devil first entred him I mean what sins first seized him how they have grown up and continued with him but this will be too long a work for an hour or two Such a person therefore had need to set apart whole dayes for this purpose till he hath a little recovered himself and set his accounts straiter with God Yet must he not while he is enquiring after unknown or forgotten sins neglect to repent of his fresher and known transgressions If therefore so it is that for the present he cannot recollect himself and make a diligent search into the whole course of his life yet must he confess and bewail what he knows of himself and together acknowledge how much he is in arrears which he hath forgotten or at present doth not see and for all humbly beg mercy But this not so as wholly to put off surther enquiry but having this Fast examined himself touching so many years or moneths according as his life finds his thoughts work upon his next Fast proceed farther and so on the next still farther till he come home to his present age Now in this sifting of my life if I can it will be very useful to me and much further a distinct Repentance to use my Pen and through each year set down my sins By this means I shall be able much better to consider them and so both know more of my self and of the deceitful wayes which sin hath to gain upon me And because as I owe to God Confession and repentance of my sins so I owe also acknowledgment and thanks for his Mercies therefore in this enquiry it will be necessary to observe Gods remarkable Mercies and deliverances to me recording these also year by year as my sins Thus will the sight of his Mercies aggravate my sins and encrease my repentance and the sight of my sins parallel with his mercies commend his goodness and inhance my thankfulness both which are singular benefits And because even afflictions have their use and are to be accounted for if therefore I find any considerable adversity or cross with which God hath exercised me this also is to be registred as the former If it did me good I owe to God thanks for it if not I owe repentance for being incorrigible Being thus come to my present time it will become me not to run in arrears again but every â—ast day still to make my accounts even and to that purpose to take care as aforesaid that these my Fasts be not too seldome Supposing therefore that I am a person who have so far practised self examination as that I have formerly taken account of all my life That which I shall have chiefly to enquire into upon each return of these my fasting dayes will be First What new sins or commissions I have been guilty of since my last day of accounting Secondly What neglects especially if I have formerly made any vows or new engagements to God how I have observed or slighted them Thirdly In what posture or temper my heart hath continued and at present is whether soft tender penitent and in awe of God or whether dull careless insensible or otherwise out of order and prone to its old lusts Lastly How the providences of God have carried towards me sithence what mercies received what afflictions sent upon me and what hath been my carriage answerably And whatever I find more remarkable let it be registred in mine Accomptal so I call that paper book in which I use to keep account of my life and spiritual state whereof as is abovesaid I shall find singular advantage in my succeeding time Sect. 4. Of the endeavour of godly sorrow How to work our selves to it SIn is not such a thing the knowledge of which is desirable for it self but onely in order to somewhat else which it is apt to beget to wit Godly sorrow and Repentance My sins therefore being thus known I am to set my self about the sorrowing for them and repenting of them And to godly sorrow the readiest course will be more fully to fix my thoughts upon the sins of which in my examination of my self I have found my self guilty to look upon them so as that mine eye may affect my heart my attent consideration of them may move and grieve me as it ought To this purpose I am to consider particularly First the foulness of my particular sins in themselves and in their own nature how vile they make me how unable I should be to look men in the face if they knew all these unworthy acts by me which I do of my self and God far better than my self how vile therefore must they needs render me in his holy Eye Secondly The several Aggravations which they admit the chief of which and those which are aptest to affect me I may take to be those which follow 1. Against how great light and how clear knowledge of Gods will I have sinned I knew such and such actions to be sinful when yet I ventured upon them 2. Against how many checks of conscience I committed them Did not my own heart at that very instant smite me telling me of the wrath of God and eternal flames belonging to those who do such things 3. Against how many engagements and obligations to the contrary have I sinned 1. My own vows and covenant both in baptisme and since 2. Gods mercies and forbearance which should
rambling in mine employment and though I am not much guilty of doing nothing yet do I not do what I should and this is undoubtedly a piece of idleness as abovesaid for a man to neglect the business of the season and of his calling and to be most taken up in things which least concern him Now here the remedy will be to consider what it is that is my proper business to put my work into a certain mold and order and then to set my self a task daily and engage my self as well as I can to so much of it before I divert to any Eccentrical occupation I mean to the busying my self in things which do not properly concern me 2. It may be I use to sit and talk away my time with friends and company much goes in idle visits I have a nature which is too sociable and when I meet with company to my mind I know not how to deny my selfe of their society and discourse and if I do not meet with such I am apt to leave my businesâ— and go seek such Here the remedy will be partly the same with the former prudently to proportion my time to my business So much of my business have I resolved to do that resolution must not be broken so much time will that work take me up so much my devotions wherefore I have but so much left for society more therefore I must not take If therefore I am lite into any acceptable company it will become me often to consider how goes the time so much of my imposed task yet lies undone c. 3. It may be much of my time is spent in dulness sitting still c. It may be my constitution is such that if I eat heartily I am a great while unfit for my work and so feeding freely laies upon me a kind of necessity of being idle Here the remedy will be to resolve upon a sparer diet to bridle mine appetite and eat less when I do eat or if I cannot that to eat â—eldomer and to be at least but once a day unfit for my work which time of unfitness if I will well husband my time I may best allow for society it will be fit enough for that 4 It may be vexations anger or giving way to passion many times indisposeth me for business Here the remedy will be to watch against such disturbances to endeavour meekness patience and the mortification of unruly affections 5. It may be sollicitude about this world thoughtfulness cares take up many of mine hours and then mine head being full I cannot call home my mind and fall to work and when by my care I cannot find any expedient for what I sought this breeds discontent envy of other mens ease happiness freedom c. And seriously it is a great deal of time which narrow fortunes thus steal away from some men Here the remedy will be study of content frugality wise husbanding mine estate proportioning mine expences to my revenues And so what ever I find to be the occasion of my loss or expence of time let me study a suitable remedy thereto and register as well the occasion as its corresponding remedy Let me then proceed to resolve upon the use of such remedies and to order my particular affairs in such sort that I may use them with the best advantage and such resolutions let me alwaies enter upon my Accomptal for the fastning them both upon mine heart and memory Sect. 7. A further consideration of Repentance with reference to some particular sins REpentance may seem to have been considered hitherto with a Relation to habitual sins that is such sins which either by nature or custom are rooted in the heart and have begot in the soul a readiness and inclinedness unto them But surely if I throughly understand the Practice of it as it hath been hitherto described I cannot be at a loss in what sort it ought to be exercised when I find my self guilty of one particular fall or sin the habit or customary readiness to which I have not yet contracted for the substance of my work is still the same viz. Having in mine examination of my self found my self guilty I am by attent consideration of that sin whereof I am guilty both in it self and as it is mine to endeavour to affect my heart therewith so that I may truly sorrow for it and though it may be I may truly conclude that it hath not yet got fully a rooting within me yet for as much as the first or second commission thereof hath in probability made me more inclined and easie thereto than I was when my mind having been never much bent this way was thitherwards more inflexible therefore ought I to study and consult how for the future to secure and confirm my soul against any relapses or second backslidings and after such consultation to resolve and engage my self with all possible strength against it One thing more in case of sins committed or wrong done unto my neighbour is yet requisite to the making my repentance sincere and through and that is that I forthwith upon sight of the sin if possible make restitution otherwise that I make it as soon as I am able and in case I am not likely to be able to make it that I endeavour by acknowledgement of mine offence to seek for reconciliation unto him whom I have so wronged The necessity hereof may be concluded from what hath been above said that repentance cannot be true except there be an amendment Now most evident it is that while I suffer the wrong done yet to remain or continue I am still injurious and so consequently there is no amendment and therefore no repentance And the words of our Saviour most expresly enforce it If thou bring Mat. 5. 23 24. thy gift to the Altur and there remember that thy brother hath ought against thee Leave there thy gift and first go and be reconciled to thy brother then come and offer thy gist God will accept of no sacrifice or duty whatsoever at my hands in such a case till I have reconciled my self if possible If any think this not to amount to restitution let him read Levit. 6. 2 3 4 5 6. and Numb 5. 6 7 8 where he shall find besides the sin offering to be brought to God in case of wrong doâ—ie to others it was enjoyned that the principal should be restored with an addition of one fift part thereto Now if so it be that I cannot find those to whom I have been injurious that I may make restitution let me give and devote so much to the poor as would do it this is to restore unto God when I cannot to my brother let me never lay up any thing wrongfully gotten or that wherewith recompence should be made for wrong done it will eat as doth a Canker Besides I cannot if by wrong I increase my store ever have a quiet conscience or reasonably expect the pardon of
the Kings Majesty his Queen and all the Royal Family Let all thy Priests be cloathed with Righteousness and let thy work prosper in their hands and especially within this Parish of which I am a part let the knowledge and fear of thee increase Visit all my Kinred Relations and Acquaintances ** with such blessings as they need Reward a thousand fold all who have shewn any kindness to thy servant especially ** Forgive In all these vacancies thus marked ** make such particular mention as thy condition shall require or prudence suggest and have mercy upon all mine enemies and let not one of them ever fare the worse for any wrong done to me Deliver in thine own good time thy righteous ones out of all their afflictions and in the mean time support them sanctifying all unto them ** Shew thy self every way all-sufficient unto all thine Finally O Lord I bless and praise thy glorious grace for all those blessings which I enjoy and those particular deliverances whether ancient or later which thou hast vouchsafed me ** Above all for thy redeeming not onely me but the whole humane nature by the precious bloud of thy well-beloved Son for that knowledge which I have of thee in him my Saviour Christ Jesus for any sight and sense of my sin which through thy grace I have for any hopes of finding mercy in that great day ** I O Lord Here bless God for any inward ioy enlargements c. am far less than the least of these mercies It is thy goodness thy goodness alone which is the fountain whence they came and mayest thou from me and from Heaven and Earth ever receive the glory of that thy goodness May I ever serve thee in newness of life and answerable walking And do thou forgive not onely my former ingratitude but my present want of thankfulness together with all the sins of these my holy things washing me and my very teares prayers and penitence in the bloud of my Saviour Christ Jesus in whose words thy servant will speak yet once more Our Father c. It is not to be supposed that this Prayer without any alteration will suit with the condition of every Reader God forbid all should have sinned at that rate to come up to which this prayer was framed The prudent Christian therefore is to add leave out alter what he sees good or if able himself to do better to lay aside all Nothing is here obtruded on any onely directions and help intended to some who need them Sect. 10. Of offerings to God for the use of the poor departure out of the Closet and behaviour afterwards MY prayers being thus finished I should not hastily run out but pause a while and remember that there is one work remaining which is not to be neglected if I have wherewithall to do it being it is required by God in an acceptable Fast and that is to add something every fast though it be the less to what I have formerly laid aside for the poor or if there be no such stock already made by me much more than to design and devote somewhat to that purpose This is the fast I have chosen to deal thy bread unto the hungry c. It being thus given I may deal it when Isa 58. 7. I shall see occasion Now as to the particular manner of this practice directions have been above given which especially upon these dayes it will be expedient to observe And this being done let me with chearfulness depart my Closet let not my behaviour be without innocent alacrity and let it be my special care so to order all my carriage on these my fasts that they may not if possible be taken notice of by any but my self and God as being mindful of that command of my Saviours Anoint thine head and wash thy face that thou appear not unto men to fast that is behave thy self with such outward chearfulness of which anointing the head and washing the face are Arguments that no man ordinarily beholding thee would take the day he sees thee so to be one of thy fast or mourning dayes Chap. VII Of great and more extraordinary Fasts and the work of them BEsides these my Fasts which come in course at least once a week several occasions may befal me which may require an extraordinary fast Such is any great evil hanging over mine head or my friends or the Nations any considerable change of my way of living or the like but especially when I am to receive the Holy Communion My work upon such occasions will be the same as is formerly directed to only my Christian discretion will order it with a particular respect to that my great occasion which calls me to fast which occasion I am especially to meditate upon and that not without a regard had to my sins if there be any evil which I deprecate to consider how my sins have been the causes of it if any good which I beseech for how again my sins may blast that and accordingly to commend it to God in my prayers in which case also the form of prayer delivered in the foregoing Chapter will not be useless Particularly as to that which will most frequently come in practice my humiliations preparatory for the Lords Supper In these besides that examination of my self which in ordinary course I make I am to look over mine Accomptal to see every week since my last communicating what my carriage hath been how I have amended especially in those particulars in which I had formerly taken notice of my miscarriages and vowed reformation All my revolts and backslidings are to be attentively viewed in themselves and in their aggravations and repentance as before taught to be with all diligence and servour that I can exercised Yea and besides these times of special exigence ought I to be often surveying and looking over mine Accomptal In mine ordinary daily devotions or in my devotions upon my fast-dayes I shall find both need and opportunity for it And if Schollars find it necessary to peruse their own Collections or Common-place books if Shopkeepers review often their books to the end they may by seeing what they have formerly done know how to order their future proceedings in their business so as not to go backward or be diligent to no purpose how much more care ought I to take in the concernments of my soul and for that Jewel which if I loose although I should gain the whole world I am irreparably undone Chap. VIII The Conclusion THe Author of this small piece Christian Reader is very sure that be thou who thou wilt thou canst not but approve for the main that practice which is here commended to thee although there should be some particulars as to the observation of Holy-dayes or the like which may not suit with the humour of every mans devotion Confident he is he saith that the daily practice of Reading Meditation Self-Examination Prayer the orderly and due practice of Humiliation Mortification and the rest of those Substantials which are here directed to cannot be gainsaid It might have been better taught but he hath done it as well and as plainly as he could Being therefore that thou canst not but say he is a good man who thus lives and wish that thou ever hadst lived so he chargeth it again upon thy conscience thus to live else art thou self-condemned and guilty of known negligence and omission Thou doest not endeavour what notwithstanding thy conscience cannot but approve He is confident further that if thou didst but feel that peace quiet joy and happiness which such practice leaves behind it if thou hast any sense what it is to have a clear Conscience and therefore free and chearful access to God and an humble fearlessness of the face of men which without some such practice as this thou canst never have thou needest no other argument to quicken thee to this practice Find a greater happiness on earth than for a man to be at peace with and like himself and get that peace by any other course than such exercise of godliness such circumspection over all thy wayes as hath been here taught and thou shalt have leave to neglect all but if thou canst not then think thy self bound to these practices For directions in the making use of the Book thou hast them in the Admonition to the Reader in the beginning of the Book whither return and read the whole over again It will be no whit worse the second time read And so God bless it and thee FINIS