reasonable things But the soul is to seek for a higher knowledge of and in it self in the light as to know that it is invisible and immortal of the breath of God wherein God is to be seen spiritually which is a great mystery not to be exprest in words but to be sought out and kept clean and bright from worldly wisdom fleshly filth and earthly vanities above the sensual part to see it self in Jesus Christ the Way Truth and Life the ancient Path wherein the holy men of God ever walked to please him in diligent labour and travel of mind and sufferings of the outward man and yet with fulness of joy and spiritual delight In every spiritual work and employment mans will wisdom reasoning and earthly affections are to be left behind as Abraham left his servants when he went to offer his Son Isaac for a burnt-offering to the Lord and as Moses drawing near to God put off his shoes so all you that will draw near unto the Lord God cast aside and leave behind you your own selfishness wills wisdoms and imaginations with every high thought that exalteth it self and keeps your souls from closing with the Lord in his holy service that you may be by him prepared to meditate watch pray and give thanks in all things and at all times and embrace all divine counsel and heavenly help thereby freely tendered in the pure light and tender touches in the conscience to move the heart into an awful dread and true fear of God that by the stirrings of grace you may come to a knowledge of him spiritually which gift is common to all bat particularly received by the diligent soul that waits therein stable and firm according as it so receiveth and keepeth thereto with all ready chearfulness moving in its own measure of grace so given though it be never so little for the Lord is pleased suddenly to prepare mens hearts by putting meditations into their minds in the beginning and time of their conversions especially of such as have been much occupied in worldly defilements and then commonly the thoughts of such when once turned in are most upon their sins with great sorrow meekness and tears asking forgiveness and watching thereto as the Lord toucheth their so us sharply to make them the sooner clean for then the sin will be ever in the sight as foul and horrible and accompanied with fightings and hard conflicts in their consciences so as that they can take no rest until the Lord Jesus give it as pleaseth him wherein is his tender mercy that he may scowre and cleanse such souls the more speedily and forgive their sins as he wipeth them away wherein justification is in sanctification and sanctification accompanied with justification and fitteth the soul to receive some spiritual grace and gift of his love and so the holy Spirit oft stirreth to meditations in God which worketh a kindly work in their souls to be waited in and the fruits of the Spirit to be received and all in Jesus Christ as the pure power endless love and wisdom of God that sets the heart upon hungering after his vertue and spiritual discoveries in such exercises as God is graciously pleased to give in to the soul and so meditation watching and praying have no rules bounds or limits set by man unto them but when and as the Lord Jesus pleaseth to give by the holy Spirit for his gift it is for disposing of his chosen ones and drawing in their souls to him to be made wise in waiting knowing and obeying him spiritually wherein he giveth such tender-heartedness that they oft melt into devotion and are ravished in souls above measure somewhat like as it sometimes was with the Disciples that sate together and were filled with the holy Ghost and then spake forth the great and wonderful things of God when all they knew was oy that spiritual ravishing love and so the Lord is pleased oftentimes to open his treasury and give to some very plentifally in all ages as their souls come to be cleansed and the way made open and easie to them though the doing thereof is a great mystery to others that remain ignorant or are net watchful and diligent so that it passeth over them some growing contrary to it and at enmity with it for then the Lord withdraweth it again by reason of that slothfulness and abuse and sometimes from the more diligent to prove and try such that they may know wherein their strength standeth and after that to feel their own weakness and also know their respective states and how to love more spiritually and so partly it was with the Disciples that loved Christ much while in the flesh with them but then fleshly as in his manhood and therefore he told them it was necessary for them that he should go away and send the holy Ghost to teach them to know and love more spiritually and so the Lord oft withdraws himself outwardly that the inward and heavenly presence of his love may be the more earnestly desired meditated on and pressed after and that the soul may know its duty and employment in waiting watching and suffering until it be throughly renewed strengthned and established in his spiritual might and power to glorifie him with more fervent love and holy worship and if it so come to pass that he who is watchful and diligent therein feels not this vertue enabling him to meditation or spiritual imployment with his whole heart as he desireth but in stead thereof fee leth many other thoughts run in upon him and hinder him and the more pain he taketh to keep his heart in watching and waiting for spiritual feeling the farther off it is to the very last and again harder afterwards this is to teach him to watch more singly and sincerely within the soul and forget all things without and to know that it is no easie thing to love with all the heart until the heart be renewed for this work will be found painful and laborious at first by the pressing in of vain thoughts and a full hard task it is for him that feels no grace to be long meditating waiting and watching in his soul and much will he be encumbered with running and roving thoughts as having gotten no sure hold of his heart and therefore is the heart to be kept unto God in the light with all diligence for thereout come the issues of life or of death for there is the good or the evil treasure and when well kept there springs up wise and clear thoughts clean affections fiery desires to spititual employment vertue and vertuous actions but otherwise thereout come the contrary as evil thoughts unclean desires and affections for every mans thoughts and meditations discover to him that is of a heedful mind what he is as that whereon he thinketh and meditateth in that he loveth so that he loveth is his God and the more he loveth God the more he mindeth him and meditateth on
talkers and contenders about words questions and outward things and would make themselves love God by their own strength and wisdom which may not be though they should act therein never so violently as it were to pull God out of heaven to them by their strivings pantings and burstings out into heat in their devoted zeal for though such suppose in their thoughts and hearts they love God and also resolve so to do and for his sake to suffer death yet these mens love in that manner is neither truely so nor is any strength so asked by them to stand therein for such souls have but either received that gift of love through Christ as a man or they have it not but would have it and so strive in their own strength to feel the love of God but come not to a waiting in the light to see and know their own souls nor themselves unworthy and unable to do any good thing think a good thought or in the least measure to move towards God or prepare their own hearts for him or see their own miserable blind and naked condition as dead in sins and trespasses waiting at the Pool to receive help and healing by the Angels moving of the water as the Lords free gift of love to eternal life which is the way for them to come to the sight of Jesus Christ as being all to them and working all in them and therefore not to strive outwardly but quietly wait and ask nothing but the gifts of love that they might be touched and taught of him to see God by his blessed light and gracious presence and then love him by his own gift of love so received through patient suffering as wrought in their souls by the holy Ghost without bodily strength or earthly skill these being the means whereby souls are made so meek and obedient that they work not of themselves at all by bodily wit or exercise but freely suffer the holy Ghost to will and to do in them and with them as best pleaseth him for the working of their souls into faith and feeling of his love by degrees without outward noise or strivings about it for Christs Voice was not heard in the street it is a soft and still voice to be heard in silence and felt of all the senses and powers of the soul and is very sweet to all savoury minds that have waited for him and they that so wait long and covet after the fruits of the Spirit and sow thereto shall much encrease therein But as this is not by bodily exercise so it may not be by resting in spiritual employment already done but a pressing forward toward the mark of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus and ever following that they feel to grow therein towards perfection for otherwise there will be a sudden settling upon the old Lees and so a declining to loss and the end without profit or comfort as some Apostates who have said they have gone round back again c. and so lost not onely their hold of perfection but their first love and leading principle of God in them for there is first a beginning with rude souls and a change of the mind in the working of faith and then faith worketh by love and after that by the more strong clear and pure stirrings as felt in all active souls towards that life of perfect love for though the body of sin be at first seen in the light then debased and in some suddenly crucified yet it will be seen felt and laboured in and against until full victory be obtained as the beloved Paul said by his rejoycing in Christ Jesus he died dayly whereby the old feeling of the body of sin comes to be destroyed and the soul brought into a new gracious feeling by the operation of the holy Spirit to grow up in him who is the head of all principalities and powers VI. These things being so it highly concerns every man respectively to weigh and warily consider his own way station and standing and to prize the time and abilities that the Lords love in Christ Jesus hath allotted him to wait and watch for his conversion reconciliation and salvation and to account the time mispent and irrecoverably past sufficient to have done the will of the flesh in thinking his own thoughts speaking his own words and acting contrary to the eternal counsel and will and that the present time is onely mans to make his use of not knowing what shall be to morrow and the loss of what is past will be his greatest grief as his ignorant soul comes to see it self its sins and duty or otherwise as Christ said of Judas better to him he had never been born Whereof I onely query as the beloved Peter What shall the end be of those that obey not the Gospel of Jesus Christ but take pleasure in unrighteousness and mind not the Lords love in drawing them or their duties in a willing yeilding and suitable subjection thereto For great was the love of the Lord God in creating man after his own image and likeness with a soul fair clean and fit for his service and glory and yet greater when man had proudly departed from that holy and happy condition and made himself unfree and unfit to embrace that love and serve that end in commending promising and setting forth his love again in his own onely Son to restore man and bring him back into God from whom he so wilfully and wickedly departed by the enticement of the Devil and thereby to free him from the snares thereof and pains due therefore and yet his especial and greatest love is to be felt tasted and sweetly savoured in his free cleansing of mans soul by the gift of the holy Ghost whereby it becomes to be conformed to the likeness of his dear Son by which love he giveth of his Godhead to every obedient and clean soul that comes to will and to do of his good pleasure as a fit vessel and temple for the holy Ghost to dwell in and walk in which all his sons and daughters that are heirs of this salvation do right-well know and therein are made willing and obedient ready and diligent to help all others what they may to come to the same happy condition of blessed love and heavenly sweetness that all things may be restored to their first and primitive purity and the great mercy and love of the Lord seen to and felt by all his creatures for whom he taketh care in their respective kinds feeding the Ravens clothing the Lilies and much more the obedient soul that is of his own breath and waits upon him by his Spirit being plain and simple in the truth and willing to do all things in the eternal will ever waiting to live always in his light of love by every word that proceeds out of his mouth until he be swallowed up of the divine will and inexpressible goodness and wisdom and so settled in his
rest with a sober and chaste mind as to be preserved from touching any thing that defiles or wherein the soul feels not the pure love meek motion and heavenly life of Jesus Christ above all outward appearances likenesses or forms of words and as it is contrary to and envyed of all natural selfishness VII In the next place truely to know this one Lord Jesus Christ come in the flesh as the new and living way to the Father the Immanuel God with us making the atonement by the blood of his Cross to have all things subject unto him his servants in him and he in them which is the great mysterie of godliness hid from Ages and Generations until the fulness of time and then manifested in the flesh justified in the spirit believed on in the world and received up into glory which none of the wise men of this world ever knew or can know by all their learned skill of earthly wisdom nor any man that lives after the flesh or satisfieth himself with hearing reading telling or talking of him or concerning what he or his Apostles did said or suffered as those that vainly take his Name into their mouths on most occasions of their invented ways but know him not neither by his divine Nature nor Name nor how God and man became one Christ Jesus how that which may be known of God is manifest in man how he is the wonderful counsellor The mighty God The Prince of peace The Author and Finisher of our faith how he saves his people from their sins is the Reconciler without imputation of sin how he is formed in his servants and cleanseth them by his blood from all sin and unrighteousness how they take up the cross and follow him or what the cross is how the body becomes dead because of sin and the spirit alive for righteousness sake how they are members of his body of his flesh and of his bones how he is their Leader and captain of salvation made perfect through sufferings how they are baptised into his death and saved by his life how the Union is perfected in all the parts and members of his body the Church what the Church is or how his Body or what it is to eat his flesh and drink his blood without which as himself said we have no life in us how every knee shall bow to him of things in heaven in earth and under the earth and confess that Jesus Christ is Lord to the glory of God the Father how he is that blessed and onely Potentate King of kings and Lord of lords The head of all thrones and dominions and every name that is named c. And therefore not knowing him cannot worship him accordingly Neither are such willing to become obedient to him in his light that maketh all things manifest naked and bare whereby he brings every secret thing to light and passeth judgement upon the transgressing nature and bruiseth the branches of it with every lust of the flesh lust of the eyes and pride of life that are not of the Father but of the world nor to know him the Healer and Maker up of the breach the Repairer of the ancient path to walk in by cleansing mens souls that are full filthy while they remain ignorant of him or have any fleshly appetite lust or like desire alive in them whereby the fair pearl is blemished and much more filthy when their souls are taken up with a full love and liking of this world and wholly overcome by the sensual and fleshly part that they chuse it and delight therein as the full rest of their hearts so that they feel no liquor of life or sweetness of grace stirring them to loath what their flesh liketh nor to desire that heavenly food of their souls so they do not bear the image of sin but are born and carryed with it and of it and feel no strength but in it nor no will to leave it but yeild thereto with all ready forwardness But Jesus Christ is the food of all hungry souls and through him in him and by him are such souls reformed and restored into their first and fair likeness of God in righteousness and true holiness and so is the new man created in Christ Jesus to good works to walk in them by the Divine will and quickning Spirit whereby the flaming sword comes to be removed and the everlasting gate opened to all willing and watchful souls to enter thereat into the heavenly and endless life where Jesus Christ is the Door the Porter and Receiver always waiting ready to imbrace the souls that so watch pray wait and attend to be here in this life reformed by his Spirit into his likeness and love to live by the words of his mouth as swallowed up of the Divine will of inexpressible sweetness and so walk in the Spirit of love and meekness with sober and chaste minds as the Lords free-men without handling or touching any unclean thing that defiles or where in their souls feel not the pure love meek motion and holy life of Jesus Christ above all shadows types figures forms or fleshly things c. There be many that think they love Jesus Christ and know him to whom he may truly say I know you not depart from me ye are workers of iniquity Though they may have attained to a fleshly knowledge of him by imagining thinking and fashioning him in themselves with their minds thoughts affections desires cares and bodily wits and so suppose they love fear serve and worship him as a man like themselves yet without sin that God is wroth with them as a man that is offended that Christ died for their sins and therefore they fall down at his feet with sorrow of heart crying for mercy and pardon and like the five foolish Virgins suppose they are ready for him have good trust in his mercy and so reverence him and fear before him and thereupon do verily believe they so know and worship him because they feel their hearts moved and stirred with love to him and desire of him But this is not the worship in spirit and truth which he expects and accepts for all this while these worshippers know not their own souls nor God in Christ Jesus reconciling them to himself nor have they any Oyl in their lamps or sweet liquor of life suppling their souls for the Lord Jesus is not seen much less known and worshipped by mens imaginations for the earthly nature cannot receive retain or bear this heavenly new wine So there was a time when Christ Jesus told his Disciples he had many things to say unto them but they could not then bear them and yet being upright in hearts to the Lord he is pleased so to temper strengthen and comfort them with such an inward beholding that they forsake sins and the great love of this world whereby the invisible light of his Godhead is somewhat shadowed to the inner eye of their souls under the bedily
men according to right reason and clear them of their fleshly lusts that war against their souls did they not disable themselves thereto by withstanding it and the checks thereof in their own consciences and by yeilding to the enemy of their souls to have dominion over them whereby the working of grace comes to be stopt so that it may not enter shine finde room or rest in their souls though it be truely tendered and there sheweth it self to discover things that differ as the Sun doth outward things where it is not letted but while the strong man thus armed keeps the house the things he possesseth are in peace the root body and image of sin stands the false and misruled love lives and the soul remains insensibly wrapt up in stinking rags of sin and selfishness where it feeds on nothing but black smoke in thick darkness and spiritual blindness as a body of sin and death born about and heavily loading the soul and conscience that it cannot comprehend the light but every tentation of the same nature with it prevails over it and leads it captive more and more into a servile slavery and lustful living in fleshly filth for sin is not any corporeal thing and therefore not corporeally to be destroyed striven about or contended with neither have men any power of themselves to amend this in themselves more then in others and therefore cannot but so remain until their minds be truely turned into and surely kept in the pure light which onely can discover and shew them the fairness or foulness of their souls and the love of Jesus Christ therein giving power to take up and bear the cross within in the powers of the soul and feel the two Laws warring against each other as Paul sometimes did and the innermost of the Law of the spirit of life striving for deliverance out of captivity and to gain victory over the Law of the flesh earthly will and worldly wisdom that rests seated in the bodily wits and as the reasonable soul comes to take part with and thereby wait in the pure principle of light and spiritual leading to have some sight of it self and somewhat of the treasures of wisdom and knowledge that are in Christ Jesus as his free gift to all obedient souls thereby the soul begins to see somewhat of it self and how highly it is concerned to keep a constant inward watch labour and strive by the measure of light and life so in wardly received to keep the thoughts from all bodily things until the sore pain and miserable blindeness of that condition as Paul when he cried out O wretched man that I am be found and felt and then will the Lord Jesus appear as the pain of this dark soul and conscience wherein is to be a free suffering with a patient waiting and abiding with him in his love and meekness until he shall please to raise the soâ—l up and cause the light to shine out of and over this darkness as the day-star arising in the heart to give another life whereby to overlive all the former dead and dark life and then to think no more on that darkness past as a woman forgets her pain and peril for joy that a man is born loathe and despise it but be ever ready and quick in keeping the heart and taking heed that no open door nor privy hole be left to imaginations wisdom of words or earthly vanities that would draw out the soul from the love of God ever minding that as we have born the ugly image of the earthly so it is requisite that we bear the image of the heavenly and as our Lord Jesus breaks down this earthly image of false love and likings he sets up the contrary vertues of pure love meekness patience and brotherly kindeness of his own forming in the poverty of such spirits and also gives true zeal in spiritual devotion with soberness and chastity in soul and body and so puts down the old man with his deeds rotten desires and affections and there sets up the new man of a meek and chaste spirit created in him to good works to walk therein with all his parts and members fitly composed together for his service and glory wherein the old members eye ear heart affections imaginations or desires will not serve the turn but all the whole vessel must be new to hold the new wine and heavenly liquor of the blessed and endless life and thereby be freed from fleshly uses vain thoughts light looks unsavory words carnal reasonings and heeding the praise or dispraise of men and mens judgements but surmounting and over-topping all lets and impediments in the way of this perfect freedom and lightsome liberty in the Lords service as guided and strengthened therein by his holy Spirit as it turns the reason into that pure light and the will into the eternal will which is a great work and therefore to be well waited in until there be no sin charged or felt as a load on the conscience but all freely pardoned as it is discovered to the soul and clean wiped away and so the soul reformed by the siritual light and bright beams of Jesus Christ let into it as burning desires clean affections holy and wise thoughts and considerations and therewith abilities to flee all deadly stirrings in this travel of soul from the first old Adam to the second that makes all things new And though men should otherwise cease to meddle with worldly business avoid outward delights and pleasures and devote themselves to pray read study learn and confer of heavenly matters sigh weep or do any other act outwardly or otherwise yet if he love himself mind or carefully heed providing for the flesh or outward man or have any other earthly fears cares or immoderate desires this will not do it but the greater is the deceit by such forsakings and actings in his becoming affected with himself as if better then others or in slighting others by terms or titles of distinction whereby he is so much the worse and more disabled to good or if he suffer his heart at all to rest in bodily feelings of spiritual comforts or sweetness or set his heart on any such fleshly savours he thereby loseth that life he seemeth to seek for because not rooted and grounded in love but the fleshly part gains ground again in the earthly dark and dead nature and then is the law of sin served for the time but yet if there be no wilful sin or liking thereto it is not he but sin that stirreth in him which he consenteth not to And thus have many been troubled and overlaid for a time with weight upon their weaker parts that they have not had for that time any clear sight or freedom in themselves but sate sadly without any knowledge of their own conditions or abilities to move one step forward because sin got so great a hold or as a lodging in their fleshly parts that it troubled the Reason
and sometimes so far prevailed as to occupie the affections of the soul while the Spirit as a law within was labouring for deliverance until the Lord Jesus pleased to prepare the soul and break into it by his blessed presence and give it feeling of pure love and so stretch the heart forward to fathom and follow what is before for behinde are all bodily things thoughts desires fears and such like that hinder the comfort in and speed of the whole work for nothing is to be kept from the slaughter that is for destruction no mean in destroying sin though a right hand or eye they must away and give place to the divine work of the Spirit in the light which is bâ—fore as the spiritual vertues begâ—n in the Reason of the willing soul and to be perfected in love as it comes to be reformed into the grace of Christ to a perfect hatred of the deeds of the flesh and all wavering mindedness and want of love for otherwise he hinders the work through his own wâ—lfulness and choice in the contrary nature which will cause all to be to little purpose troublesom and heavie as a working in the fire if not thereby destroyed because of his not feeling any grace or spiritual savour therein The ways wiles and dâ—vices of the evil one to deceive and devour souls are such and so divers in these later days that the ignorant and unskilful souls may not easily escape because he takes all advantages by the times temptations bodily wits and faculties of such dark souls to lead them into self-love and the sundry kindes of lustful living in the vanities of their mindes wantonness and pleasure upon the earth as fitting themselves for a day of slaughter and so keeps them while he may in presumption c. but if once he see any soul would entirely give themselves to be spiritually employed then he striveth by himself and his ministers to set their sins in order before them and tells them they are great sinnâ—rs and more in this change and turning then in any thing before saying to them That is not the way but a denial of Christ a fancie and frenzie of a Fanatick spirit and for some wicked end and that it will bring them into contempt want and poverty wherein none will pity them that they must change their conditions with their mindes wives and children come to want that they will fall into bodâ—ly sickness and be laid in prisons that they should have learned men to advise them better the Ministers to admonish them and pray for them to take counsel at the Priests lips which preserve knowledge and not run of their own heads with a few giddy contemptible people that are ignorant of the Scriptures and Original tongues and if they depart not from their new way greater temptations will overtake them And with much more of this kinde doth this flattering devil seek to beguile such souls as hearken to him by the cunning craftiness of such as lie in wait to deceive and that entangle with enticing words of mans wisdom to beguile their souls with bodily savours sweetness of wits arts and outward exercises and thereby if possible draw them aside from the simplicity and puff them up with conceit of themselves as if they had by such wisdom and the ways thereof formerly found the feeling of heavenly joy and so lead them back again and up into high notions and conceits of a proud minde until they become base and blockish and thereby fall full lowe at last with their cold dry and barren souls for the more they imagine to gain by such means the greater will be their loss and they the farther off from what they so seem to seek and much more indisposed to return into the right way of obtaining it for thereby the minde will be oft and highly lifted up as if it were in a happie estate and condition more holy vertuous and better then others and to rejoyce as if they had escaped a very great temptation and to conceive angry stirrings in themselves when others seem not so to esteem of them and the flattering spirits will suddenly praise and applaud such as for good deeds and vertuous living and this last is the sorest and greatest of all temptations and most dangerous because of the delight men will seem to feel about them by such sounds to the ear and sweet savour of sense tickling them with delight therein as if all were well and they had much grace and were rightly travelling with their mindes from fleshly things while they are onely ravished with spiritual pride wherein the vain love and self-conceit prayeth weepeth speaketh and thanketh God with the Pharisee while they know not God but their proud hearts deceive them and lead them to shew outward love and meekness in speech and gesture as if they were spiritually vertuous and that they disliked nothing but sin onely because it is contrary to God and yet are even then at the gate of spiritual death so puft up with pride and pleasure therein as that they are even dead while they live or rather twice dead and pluckt up the roots become servants to men and times mistaking one thing for another with their fleshly hearts got aloft and puffed up resting in the root and rottenness of sin black and thick darkness filling their souls which may be hid from some men yet Christ Jesus sees it and abhors it and their services because of their hypocrisie and heresie so accompanied with bodily and spiritual pride which was never learned of Christ as their God for man maketh any thing his God that his heart is in love with that he takes content in dares sin against God for or wrong any man by and so such men have their divers kinds of Idol-gods one his belly another the applause of men a third his opinions and words heard or spoken wherein such serve not the Lord Jesus but their own lustful mindes and every other thing that a man chuseth by his own act to take pleasure in is his God and then when God stirs up such souls to obedience and gives them suitable abilities these proud hearts resist all and in stead of obedience become rebellious heady harsh and high-minded abusing the tender mercies of the Lord God in the light of his spiritual leadings to repentance and this condition is as aforesaid the more desperate because therein such conclude that all is well and sound and that they are right sure and righteous even above any ordinary Pharisee and so arrogate to themselves And therefore hear and consider thou that thinkest thou standest that supposest thou art raised from death to life hast tasted of the good word of God and born it may be some afflictions and take heed of this false liberty for then will Satan try and winnow thee and be teaching thee as aforesaid or as sometime he would have done Jesus Christ to cast himself down to turn stones into
good and evil whereby the inner eye of Adams soul was shut and the spiritual light then over-laid as withdrawn from his soul and the outward eye of fleshly love and worldly liking was opened in him with which he did not sâ—e before nor know that new day of evil and darkness wherein he afterwards and all his posterity in that nature now rejoyce and take their pastime and yet but as in vain shews unskilful heaviness of heart with fleshly angeriness fears and dreads and this before the eye of mans understanding be opened so as to discern spiritual things or to understand Scriptures and no doubt but these are well known unto many who have also in prayer and otherwise felt and tasted the sweetness of the spiritual work so as to have thought nothing so pleasing as it and have not known what it was that they so delighted in but it was indeed the gift of God in the light to be waited on as it begets devotion contrition many sweet tears burning desires and mournings for sin to scowre and cleanse the heart and mould it into a wonderful sweetness of a ready mind to fulfil the will of God and to trust him without questioning what shall become of the outward man or other like relations so as the will of the Lord were done in him and by him But some that so obtained to this first gift of God in light that would have wrought them into a like condition and resolution had he been attended upon therein have departed from it as many did that followed Christ for a time which caused him to say to Peter and the rest Will ye go away also but if such inward feeling as this bring with it true and pure love then it may not be so lost though sloth may cause it to seem hid or clouded for a time and especially in case the mind so moved shall turn out by consent into the visible things and thereupon the evil one catch it and transform it into an angel of light and then that soul is not able to see clearly within it self who is working there much less afar off though he have a kind of outward feeling but no stability of soul or inward certainty but all sounds and favours any way satisfying the senses draw out the minde from Jesus Christ the true light so that it cannot then come to see and behold him spirituasly and love him perfectly as leading into heavenly thoughts and desires and to a loathing of self and all earthly delights and then by reason of such lazie and lustful desires the steadfast minding of JESUS is neglected and the intended knot of union then in knitting becomes loose and unties for the time But of this be sure that what spiritual feeling revelation or manifestation knits that knot of love and devotion to Jesus Christ and opens the eye of the soul to a more clear and spiritual knowing of him also begets meekness and love and settledness in the soul and casts man down by reason of his unworthiness and unprofitableness towards God and man as a wretch and out-cast of men unmeet to live amongst them by reason of his beastly lewd fleshly and blind mind ignorant of spiritual things and of his own soul not knowing Jesus Christ nor any of his spiritual workings or worship for that none worship him truely but in the spiritual revelation and feeling of himself for it is by meekness of love that a man is kept single to God and free from harshly beholding other mens deeds unskilfully done and looking on others evil actions irregularly or otherwise then as matters of mourning and cautions to himself and them and if he reprove them to do it in love soberly and secretly and to look on God and on himself as if there were no other man in the world and himself most wretched and vile and teacheth him ever to watch diligently lest sin get entrance into his soul to judge or condemn no man hastily but say always to himself What have I been what am I what hath God done for me what have I done against him and what for him thereby to come and see his own state and station and as the Lord giveth him grace to wait in that his own measure of the gift and never fain to have more then he hath in faith and feeling or act otherwise then he hath received grace and keeps to that though it be never so little and moves not our of that so received or to do any thing because another did or doth it for that cannot be of faith but will run a man out of breath and become sin to his soul And know for certain that he who waiteth meekly and acteth according to his measure of grace received until more be given by the pure motion and revelation of Jesus Christ and yet ever desireth more most and best but works onely according to what he hath shall be sure in due time to have a suitable supply And thus ought every man to enter particularly into his own soul to know it and the strength thereof with its fairness or foulness to see its dignity at first and wretchedness by sin since with the labouring in the soul against the ground of all sin little and much which ground is onely the false misruled love of mans heart to himself from which at first sin had its beginning in him and until this fallow-ground be plainly plowed up and all fleshly and worldly loves hopes desires and fears be removed the soul can never see and feel the pure burning spiritual love of Jesus Christ nor enjoy his presence in the soul or discern spiritual things by the light of understanding which is not right until wrought into the fear of God for thereby is the mind and heart drawn out to all sinful likings by mans own understanding to rest in all beastly love earthly thoughts and fleshly things and therefore it is at first so laborious to love Jesus Christ truely and spiritually and may not be while his love is not felt therein because that must teach him to hate his fleshly life father and mother as Christ said and take up the cross quietly and follow Christ as before is said to the mortifying of his members that are earthly even every unclean lust and unskilful love of himself and see the ground of sin broken within and by degrees the body thereof destroyed as there shall be a loathing and despising of it in the heart and of all the beauty liking and fairness of this present world as a stinking Carrion labouring night and day to war spiritually against it and all its enticements as the spiritual eye shall be opened for otherwise none can see it much less war against its enterprises As Adam by his sin saw and felt the new light of fleshly love and likings of this world which in his innocency he saw not in the new and evil day that Job cursed being the concupiscence which the
the powers of the soul So there is a meekness that is gained by the working of reason in fleshly feeling and another that is deeply felt in the soul and is the free and spiritual gift of love and it is a full hard thing and a great mystery to him that stands in the working of his own reason to keep constant rest and softness in his heart and charity to love men when they despise him without resisting or repining thereat c. Both these are of love but the first worketh by the reason of the soul the second worketh by the holy Spirit in the soul and so the first is imperfect the second perfect The first meekness a man feeleth in beholding his sin and wretchedness and judging himself unworthy of any mercy or good thing at the hand of God and as the worst of creatures worthy of all sufferings and thus thrusteth himself down under all others and grieveth in his heart when he is overcome by any temptation confesseth accuseth himself and asketh forgiveness c. But this is not perfect meekness for it comes of beginning to profit in grace caused by beholding of sins and this is the meekness that love worketh by the reason of the soul But perfect meekness the soul feeleth of the sight and spiritual knowledge of Jesus Christ seeing him to be all and do all in the soul and for it and hath so great love and joy in that spiritual sight that it forgetteth it self after a sort and leaneth to Jesus Christ with all the love it hath to behold him and heeds not any unworthiness or sins before done but setteth it self with all sins past and good deeds also at nought as unworthy to be remembred and judgeth no particular soul neither better nor worse them himself but loves and helps the good in all and every man therein and slighteth and despiseth all the joy and worship of this world as seeing it so little and nought in regard of the joy and love the soul feeleth in the spiritual sight of Jesus Christ and knowledge of his purity and holiness that though he might have all worldly joy and worship without sin yet he would not meddle with it The world hath no savour in this meekness but is exceeding far from it It is the lover of Jesus Christ onely that hath this meekness abiding in him with liking and gladness and that without any heaviness or stirring for it But the world hath a proud meekness belonging to an hypocrite without this joy or gladness by the gift of the holy Ghost and do heed the praises of men as also fear their dispraises taking pleasure or displeasure thereat in themselves and it 's like this was the snare that David prayed to have his heart pluckt out of And many that yet love the praise of men more then God or his praise do bestir themselves travel and labour with their wills wits and affections and so think on God Christ and outward exercises as it were by their strength to draw out of themselves a feeling of the love of God in Christ even by bodily force and mastery if that were possible But these love not spiritually nor is this a kindly or gracious work of love but a kind of maddoing of the soul at Reasons bidding which without meekness and forsaking the love of earthly things is very dangerous to beget spiritual pride which otherwise done in meekness of love and a loathing of all earthly affections may finde favour with the Lord and be by him changed from mans own works into spiritual workings for as man cannot think a good thought of himself so he ought to forbear his own thinkings words and works as not good and therefore can find no acceptance with God and wait with patience for the Lords working in him to will and to do of his good pleasure all other workings being to the soul's greater sufferings and loss as the Prophet said The kindling of fires with mans own sparks causeth the foul to lie down in sorrow In such an imperfect Lover Love worketh freely by the affections of man but in perfect Lovers Love worketh within in the light by spiritual affections killing all other affections in the soul and that both kindly and quietly but man not knowing this work of the holy Spirit will not believe how the vertues of Meekness Soberness Chastity Love and Cleanness is wrought so quietly and surely without travel or painful labour of the body and bodily wits and therefore they labour and toil day after day with their Reasons and outward exercises in their own strength to get vertues and make love by words and other stirrings and what they seem so to get they have much more ado to keep with all their fightings against sin contendings for grace and wranglings about it and therefore are like Wrastlers sometimes above and soon again underneath up and down in and out off and on getting and losing and so weary their wits and tire themselves because all this striving is in their own reason might and strength of self-will as fightings with themselves but neither in true savour nor love and therefore have not the victory or upper hand of what they strive about and such must loose the full rest because no man may so put himself fully into Gods hands for that man seeth him not but his eye being shut he thereby closeth it faster lest he should see and will not know it and though some such may suffer bodily pains for what they do as in love to Jesus Christ and that gladly yet being not of the holy Spirit led by the fire of burning love and brightness it is fully mingled with high pride presumption judging and disdaining them by whom they suffer and yet these say and think they are in charity and that they suffer all for the love of God but are begailed by the Devil's transformings because their knowledge of God is principally in imaginations and their love to him in natural affections and bodily likenesses at the best but as milk before strong meat for in strong feeding on the Father's Bread at his own Table the imaginations may not be serviceable unless to the feeling in understanding when need is and then onely as a hand-maid waiting on the hand of her Dame Many do like well of the Vertues of Meekness Lowliness and Patience as in their own reasons and wills that are enemies thereto in their affections through grudgings in themselves at those in whom they are and so can have no love to Vertue or vertuous men or know how to delight in them as such spiritually and what these men do by the stirrings of reason in them is but out of a fleshly fear of God or rather applause of men for Jesus Christ is but as a stranger to the soul until his Image be therein reformed in meekness and love which is his Livery and wherein he discovers himself and his secrets as he said to his
Disciples Learn of me for I am lowly and meek and you shall finde reft to your souls and again Love ye one another or love together as I have loved you by this said he shall all men know that you are my disciples He did not say They should be known by working miracles casting out Devils preaching teaching or praying which should be more minded by those that now desire signes and wonders that they may otherwise see if they shut not their eyes while true love and meekness are the greatest of miracles in these last and perilous times wherein men strive to resist evil not to suffer it to revenge wrongs rather then to forgive them as Christ commanded rather to fain love and meekness then be possessed of them suffer and endure all things and such is not worthy the name of love or meekness in mans will which is but altogether imperfect but meekness as in pure love and spiritual affections is perfect meekness and he that hath this is a meek man poor in spirit that knoweth himself as he is and ought to be known dissembleth not but loveth all others in or for God but where grudgings are in the heart towards any or unquiet thoughts the heart is not clean the conscience is not pure nor the walking charitably or with God in love of clean affections and consequently in and for God for the more evil any one doth to a meek man the more good doth he to him as to a man out of his right minde and so do thou and pray for such as Christ commanded and observe how he himself did by Judas for all his wickedness and to others never so much as saying to any man Thou lyest though some falsly accused him said He had a devil c. neither do I read that he reproved Judas openly bâ—t rather waited for his repentance to the very last and the more like to Jesus Christ thou art herein the more thou lovest thy self onely in God and not out of him and so thou lovest truly and not onely for righteousness vertue of God in thee or others so thou lovest not thy felf but God and if thou be yet bound in sin and feelest the burden of it then so thou lovest thy self for God to be freed by him from sin into his service and so if thou truly live in meekness thou lovest every man in the first place thou lovest God in man and in the second place thou lovest man for God that he may be his so should God be loved in all and for all and all in him and this is true love but if thy minde be troubled or unquiet when thou art rebuked belyed or evilly entreated then there is pride remaining in thy heart seem thou never so holy outwardly and there lyes hid like a Fox in his den And no good deed canst thou possibly do but it is spoiled therewith and thou hast thy reward for it is a mystery to love mens persons which ever ought to be and loathe their sins as contrary to God but it is no mystery to fain or pretend love fast sit silent preach give to the needy c. for these things bad men may do but to love men truly and hate the evil in them is the gift of God by the holy Spirit of Love which he gives freely and readily to all that wait truely for it and is therefore most pretious and profitable and without this there is not meekness of love to all men and a seeking the salvation of all but a stumbling and erring from the truth and mistaking one thing for another errours for truth and truth for errours because Covetousness and Anger is not forsaken while any other love but what is so in God and for God remains as to any creature or thing and thou shalt sinde it easier to forsake riches and lusts then the love of them for he that coveteth or desireth any thing he hath not and thereby keeps back the clean desires to Vertâ—e is yet covetous and look how much sorrow thou feelest upon the loss of any thing so much was thy love to it so that thou covetest not spiritual things so as thou oughtest but that thou stamblest at them and then how shouldst thou be filled with kindly savour within while the flesh retains its beastly savour without But this know that diligent watching inward hunger and pains helpeth the holy Spirit in thee to overcome yet while the bad root lives its evil branches will be springing up for therein is the compleat nature of the evil root and thereof the loathsome fruit which every evil man brings forth out of the evil treasure of his heart and there the strong man armed keeps the house until there be a free yeilding to Jesus Christ in meekness and pure love wherein he may overcome that strong man and strip him of all his strength and weapons wherein he trusteth and create the new man according to his own image and likeness of righteousness and true holiness and as thou receivest him with ability to exercise thy sences and discern things rightly to have Jesus Christ formed in thee and as thou conceivest him and he lives in thee thou wilt bring forth good things out of the good treasure of his life by strong desires and earnest actings to please him and be made like unto him not as of fleshly forming but in full meekness of minde pure love full perfection and fruition of all heavenly vertues and unchangeable blessedness whereunto Christ Jesus is the door he the Porter and not another he opens and no man shuts and shuts and no man opens by him is the enterance the going in and out and finding pasture for he is the pasture even the living bread that came down from heaven and is in heaven the well of water springing up to everlasting life of whom all the several sects and sorts of men that climb up another way are ignorant and so wanting the nourishment thereof fall short of the glory of God and yet forward to reprove others without any certain knowledge of those things in themselves or considering with how much meekness gentleness love and privacie for the most part reproofs ought to be even in weighty matters and in all as thrust on by divine love and some hopes of thereby shewing the sinner the evil of his way that he may be reclaimed ever weighing well how dangerous it is to abase and reprove others and not live in the light ones self and how many tribulations and tentations others have born to keep thee low in thine own eyes and learn to know how to esteem others highly in love for their works sake but but whosoever arrogates to or exalts himself thereby becomes base and blockish an antichrist unfit for any spiritual work and shall certainly fall low at last because the power of the Lord Jesus hath not had a kindly working in such a soul or his pure presence received by it or