11. They worshiped them bowed unto them and fell down before them Dan. 13 2. Isa. 44.7 Ios. 23.6 They would lift up their eyes unto them Ezek. 33.25 Pray unto them 1 King 18.26 Hab. 2.16 Isa. 44. 17. Kiss them Hos. 13.2 King 19.8 set up Candles before them Baruch 6.19 Make vows on them Baruch 6.35 and go Pilgrimage to some of them very far Ier. 51.44 expecting some miraculous cure from the Image Baruch 6.41 In entring into their Temples they sprinkled themselves with water Altars they had of stone Isa. 65.3 They used vain repetitioâ—s in their prayers Matth. 6.7 They measured their Religion and goodness thereof by plenty Ier. 44.7 They had their sacrificing Priests Act. 14.13 and they were shaven Priests Baruch 6.31.32 Sometimes they were of the basest of the people 1 King 12.31 whosoever would might for money or for money-worth make himself a Priest 1 King 12.31 2 Chron. 13.9 And some served for base wages Iudg. 17. They had their Concubines Baruch 6.11 Hos. 4.14 Some of them would wear their hair-cloaths and torment themselves 1 Kings 18.26.28 Zach. 13.4 and of a Devotion in a Will-worship macerate their bodies punishing and not sparing their bodies Col. 2.23 Their Teachers taught for hire Mich. 3. 11. 2 Pet. 2.13 15. Rev. 2. Tit. 1.11 For gifts they would promise life and peace Ezek. 13.22 Ier. 23.14 17 In their service they had variety of musick Dan. 3. Their set holy days Exod. 32. 2 King 13. They had their holy women attending their Idol-service Ezek. 8. ver 14. working for them 13.18 2 King 23.7 and prophesying lies Ezek. 13.22 and were great worshippers of the Queen of Heaven Ier. 7.18 44.19 They had also their several Gods for their several Countries as Papists have their Saints 2 King 17.29 18.34 They would pray to these and swear by them Ier. 57. 12.16 Gen. 31.53 1 King 19 2. 2 King 17.35 Zep. 1.5 Some in Israel which fell to Heathenish Idolatry were like Church-Papists for they would worship Idols and yet go to God's House and hear his Prophets Ier. 7.8 10. 2 King 17.14 Ezek. 14.3 7 20. 1 31. 23. 29. When Idolatry was cast out of the Churâ—h as we have done the Idolatry of Rome the Idolaters would condemn it as an â—ll act in them and speaking against the serving of God aright as Papists do against us 2 Kings 18.22 They worshipped towards the East Ezek. 8.16 They were very superstitious Acts 19. They lived in very gross ignorance of the Truth and in liberty of sinning Isa. 44.18 19. 45.29 Eph. 4. 18 19. Wisd. 14.15 16 17. They worshipped they knew not what Iohn 4.22 Their Festivals after their Idol Service they spent in Eating Drinking Singing Dancing Exod. 32.6 18 19. They had their Revellings and Meetings full of Excess and Riot 1 Pet. 4.3 And wonder at and speak ill of such as would not be like them They had Brothel-houses Ezek. 16.24 2 Kings 23.17 1 Kings 15.12 13. 14.24 22.26 They had amongst them Conjurers Wizards Charmers Observers of times Southsayers Astrologers Star-gazers and such like To these the People resorted and consulted with 2 Kings 21.6 1 Sam. 5.2 1 Chron. 10.13 Hest. 37. 9.24 Deut. 18.14 Isa. 19.3 47.1213 Hos. 4.12 Ezek. 21. 21. Ier. 8.17 Act. 8.10 They sacrificed to Nets and burnt incense to Drags Hab. 1. 16. They believed that some of their Images were approved of their great God from Heaven Act. 15.35 They were cruel and bloodily minded against all that were against their Idolatry Hos. 10.14 13. 16. 2 King 21.15 16. Iudg. 6.30 2 Chr. 24.18.21 The Idolaters in Israel and Iudah brought in the Heathen as Gods plague upon them to punish them for their Idolatry 2 Chro. 24 23. 21.16 17. 33.11 30.6 10 17. King 17.18 as the Papists have brought the Turks upon the Christian World by their Imagery and Idolatry Revelations 9. They were stupid and without understanding in their Idol-making and in setting them up to worship them Isa. 44.14 20. and so continued therein obstinate as the Papists do And thus have I shewed what I can say my Lord touching the Heathenish Idolaters and their practices Your evidence is so clear Mr. Protestant as hereby all may see how Pagan-like the Pope is in his Imagery Priests and Temples Is there any further â—vidence Then stands up Mr. Atturney General and did prove him to be guilty of high Treason both against the Person and the Laws of his Sovereign My Lord saith he this Fellow under pretence of Religion for all must be covered with this shadow hath set up another spiritual Head over the Church besides Christ even Antichrist his greatest enemy as is sufficiently proved He hath set up also Mediatoâ—s of Intercession besides Christ also in his rebellious pride of heart he hath exalted Man's merit made him a partâ— Saviour of himself by satisfactory punishments either here or in thrir feigned Purgatory Thus is he a Rebel and an Abettor of Rebels against Christ. Again the Law of Christ the holy Scripture he hath notoriously corrupted and abused many ways 1. He maketh it no perfect rule 2. He teacheth blasphemously that the Original is corrupt and so shaketh the Faith of all such as rest on the Scriptures 3. He hath added to them Man's Writings called Apocrypha to make them Canonical 4. He hath feigned a Traditional word and equalleth the same with the Scriâ—tures 5. He debarred for a long time the Translating of God's Word into a known Tongue to keep the people from the understanding thereof 6. Being enforced at length to translate it he hath of â—urpose done it corruptly and with many uâ—â—outh and obscure words hath hidden the Truth still to keep the people in blindness 7. Yet this their so corrupt and obscure Translation is not admitted indifferently to all but to some and to those under license for which they pay money 8. These Parties though they may read the Scriptures yet must it be with the Popes Spectacles and may not see farther â—han the False-teacher pleaseth nor conceive otherwise of the sense than he suggesteth though the Text be never so clear of it self 9. He doth blasphemously publish that the Scriptures are a Nose of Waâ— a dead letter sowterly Ink dumb Iudges and a black Gospel Inkie Divinity and may have one sense one time and another at another time according to the Churches state and condition 10. They set up a corrupt Latine Translation far as authentical as the Originals in the Hebrew and the Greek 11. And lastly He brought into the Church instead of the Holy Bible a Book of Lyes to be read Thus is the wicked Wretch guilty of High-treason against our Soveraign Besides that He hath counterfeited his Majesty's broad Seal inventing new Sacraments never of Christ's â—nstitution and hath conspired and plotted the Death of innumerable multitude of his Majesty's Subjects in a most cruel and bloody
John Dunton at y e Black Rauen in the Poultrey over agianst the Stocks MArkett London T Catlett Scâ— THE INFORMER'S DOOM OR AN Amazing and Seasonable Letter FROM UTOPIA Directed to the Man in the MOON Giving a full and pleasant Account of the Arraignment Tryal and Condemnation of all those grand and bitter Enemies that disturb and molest all Kingdoms and States throughout the Christian World To which is added as a caution to honest Country-men the Arraignment Tryal and Condemnation of the Knavery and Cheats that are used in every particular Trade in the City of LONDON Presented to the consideration of all the Tantivy-Lads and Lasses in VROPE by a true Son of the Church of ENGLAND Curiously Illustrated with about Threescore Cuts Entred according to Order LONDON Printed for Iohn Dunton at the Black-Raven in the Poultrey over-against Stocks-Market 1683. THE Epistle Dedicatory TO THE CITIZENS OF LONDON Gentlemen YOu have here presented to your candid View a full and impartial Account with many other remarkable things of the Arraignment Tryal and Condemnation of all those grand and bitter Enemies that disturb all Kingdoms and States throughout the Christian World c. But the Application and Improvment of them is to be if you tender your Temporal or Eternal Interest made by you your selves I am not Insensible that by the exposing this Book I shall expose my self too to the censure of those who take measure of every thing by their petulant humours and have no other way to set off â—â—eir own barren Inventions but by perpetual Inâ—â—ctives against the multitude of Books which appear every day in the World Whereas indeed the mischiefs which they complain of have proceeded not from their number but quality For should every Man write an exact Narrative of the various Experiences and Circumstances of his Life comprehending as well his Vices as Vertues and have them with simplicity related how useful would this prove to the publick tho' it would much increase the number of Books but this so impartial an Account may rather be wisht for than expected since Men have ever preferred their own private Reputation before the real good of themselves or others I have comprized this Treatise in an Eighteen Penny Book though considering the Cuts it cannot be well afforded so that as it is of real use and publick concern so it might be the better disperst throughout this English Nation I Rest Dear Fellow-Citizens Your most Humble Servant PHILAGATHVS AN ACCOUNT FROM UTOPIA OF The late Famous and Remarkable Tryals of all those grand and bitter Enemies that disturb and molest all Kingdoms and States throughout the Christian World WHen the Assizes were in Vtopia Conscience the Iudge of that Country attended on by the Sheriff the Iustices of the Peace and such as necessarily were to be there being seated on the Bench of Impartiality caused the Commission of Oyer and Terminer to be Read for the speedy Tryal of all those grand and bitter Enemies that disturbed and molested that Country and all other Kingdoms and States throughout the Christian World And the very first that was called to the Bar was that Grand-He-Rogue Innocent the XI Pope of Rome Iayler set Pope Innocent the XI to the Bar. Pope Pope Hold up thy Hand Pope Thou art here Indicted by the Name of Pope Innocent the XI of the Famous City of Rome in the Parish of Babylon That thou being an illegitimate Son begotten of Falshood Murthers Assasinations Heresie Paganism Iudism hast by great Violence murder'd the Territories of the Church of God and by Spanish Inquisition bloody Massacres stabbing poysoning and killing of Kings Gun-owder Plots Treasons Rebellions and other hellish Practices usurped Authority and thrust upon God's People their humane Traditions Inventions Superstitions Will-worship Heresies Iewish Ceremonies add Paganish Idolatry to the damnation of many Christian Souls contrary to the Peace of our Soveraign Lord the King his Crown and Dignity What sayest thou hereunto Art thou guilty or not guilty Not guilty my Lord. By whom wilt thou be tryed By God and the Country But good my Lord let me have a Jury of my own choosing Iudge Because neither thou nor any of thy slanderous Favourites may say that thou hast been proceeded against rigorously and unjustly without respect to the Truth of the Cause I am content to call a Jury of thine approbation if here we can have so many as will make up the number I humbly thank you my good Lord God reward your Lordship for it Mr. Sheriff Impannel a Jury of very substantial men the chiefest you can find and fittest to go upon this Prisoner now at the Bar. My Lord I supposed that as he would crave so from your Lordships uprightness he should obtain this Favour therefore have I prepared a full Iury to this purpose It was done wisely of you Mr. Sheriff let them be called Cryer Call in the Iury. 1. Call Common Principles Vous aves Common principles 2. Call Apostles Creed Vous aves The Creed 3. Call Second Commandment Second Commandment come in My Lord I cannot get in What 's the matter My Lord saith the Cryer the Papists keep him out Command to let him in Vous aves the second Commandment 4. Call Pater noster Vous aves Pater noster 5. Call Holy Scriptures Vous aves Holy Scriptures 6. Call the Apocripha Vous aves Apocripha 7. Call Counsels Vous aves Counsels 8. Call Ancient Fathers for the first six hundred years after Christ Vous aves Ancient Fathers 9. Call Contradiction among themselves Vuos aves Contradiction 10. Call Absurdity of Opinion Vous aves Absurdity of Opinion 11. Call Consent of their own men Vous Consent 12. Call Testimony of Martyrs Vous aves Testimony of Martyrs Count saith the Clerk Then the Cryer bids them answer to their Names Common Principles one Creed two Commandments three Pater noster four Holy Scriptures five Apocrypha six Counsels seven Fathers eight Contradiction nine Absurdity ten Consent of their own men eleven Testimony of Martyrs twelve Good men and true stand together and hear your Charge My Lord here are some more summoned by Master Sheriff's Authority Who be they Master Sheriff Master Law with his Sons Civil Canon Common and Municipal Well let them attend the Court for the King's service for use if need be Pope If thou canst justly accept against any I give thee leave to challenge any such of the Iury. Good my Lord only one of the Iury I except against which is Holy Scripture except it be our own Translation Holy Scriptures excepted against by Pope Innocent Well saith the Iudge I am content it shall be so let it be either Montanus or the Rhemist or the Vulgar Edition we desire a just Proceeding with all the indifferency that may be Then the Cryer called aloud If any man can give Evidence or can say any thing against the Prisoner at the Bar let him come in
Crimes were not simply of frailty but of purpose and for that thou didst loath to keep vertuous things in thy mind What was bad thou couldest retain but what was good thou couldst not abide to think of thy Age therefore and thy pretended Craziness thou makest use of to blind the Court withal and as a cloak to cover thy Knavery But let us hear what the Witnesses have to say for the King against the Prisoner at the Bar is he guilty of this Indictment or no Mr. Integrity My Lord I have heard this Envy-good the Informer say That he could never abide to think of goodness no not for a quarter oâ—an hour and he lives next door to the Sign of the Conscience feared with an hot Iron Cler. Mr. Peaceable what can you say for our Lord the King against the Prisoner at the Bar My Lord I know this man well he is a Knave the son of a Knave he is the scum and froth of the Earth and a perfect runnagate his Fathers name was Love-bad and as for him I have often heard him say that he counted the very thoughts of goodness the most burdensome thing in the World Clerk Where have you heard him say these words Mr. Peaceable In Flesh-lane right opposite to the Church Then said the Clerk Come Mr. Love the Peace give in your Evidence concerning the Prisoner at the Bar about that for which he stands here indicted before this honourable Court Love the Peace My Lord I have heard him often say he had rather think of the vilest thing than of what is contained in the Holy Scriptures Clerk Where did you hear him say such grievous words Love the Peace Where I in a great many places particularly in Nauseous street in the house of one Shameless and in Fiâ—thlane at the sign of the Resprobate next door to the Descent into the pit Envy-good My Lord I never knew what remorse or sorrow meant in all my life I am impenetrable I care for no man nor can I be pierced with Mens Griefs their Groans will not enter into my heart whomever I mischief whomever I wrong to me it is musick when to others mourning therefore 't is that I love not the Scriptures therefore pray my Lord acquit me A Ghost appears to Mr. Envy-good publickly As he was thus speaking an affrighting Ghost appears to him in the Court and says that Hell groaned for Him and guilty he was But Gentlemen and you now appointed to be my Judges I deny that my name is Envy-good and if your Honours shall please to send for any that do intimately know me or for the Midwife that laid my Mother of me or for the Gossips that was at my Christning they will any or all of them prove that my name is not Envy-good Wherefore I cannot plead to this Indictment for as much as my name is not incerted therein and as is my true name so also are my conditions I was always a man that loved to live at quiet and what I loved my self that I thought others might love also Wherefore when I saw any of my Neighbours to labour under a disquieted mind I endeavoured to help them what I could and instances of this good temper of mine many I could give As First When ever I saw any to be disquieted in Vtopia I presently sought out means to get them quiet again 2. When the ways of the old World and of Sodom were in fashion if any thing happened to molest those that were for the customs of those times I laboured to make them quiet again and to cause them to act without molestation 3. To come nearer home if in Vtopia I saw any troubled for sin I endeavoured by someway device invention or other to labour to bring them to peace again Wherefore since I have been always a man of so vertuous a temper as some say a peace-maker is and if a peace-maker be so deserving a man as some have been bold to attest he is then let me Gentlemen be accounted by you who have a great name for Justice and Equity for a man that deserveth not this inhumane way of treatment but liberty and also a licence to seek damage of those that have been my accusers Then said the Clerk Cryer make a Proclamation Cryer O Yes for as much as the Prisoner at the Bar hath denied his name to be that which is mentioned in the Indictment the Court requireth that if there be any in this place that can give information to the Court of the orginal and right name of the Prisoner they would come forth and give in their Evidence for the Prisoner stands upon his own innocency Then came two into the Court and desired that they might have leave to speak what they knew concerning the Prisoner at the Bar The name of the one was Find-right and the name of the other Tell-truth so the Court demanded of these men if they knew the Prisoner and what they could say concerning him for he stands said they upon his own Vindication Then said Mr. Find-right My Lord I Court Hold Give him his Oath then they sware him So he proceeded Find-right My Lord I know and have known this Man from a Child and can attest that his name is Envy-good I knew his Father whose dame was Mr. Dissembler and his Mother before she was married was Mrs. Hypocrite Mr. Envy-goods Mother used often to chuck him under the Chin and play with him to encourage him in his bad practices called by the name of Mrs. Hippocrite and these two when they came together lived not long without this Son and when he was born they called his name Envy-good I was his Play-fellow only I was somewhat older than he and when his Mother did use to call him home from his play she used to say Envy-good Envy-good come home quick or I 'll fetch you Yea I knew him when he sucked and though I was then but little yet I can remember that when his Mother did use to sit at the door with him or did play with him in her Arms she would call him twenty times together chucking him under the Chin My little Envy-good my pretty Envy-good and O my sweet Rogue Eâ—vy-good and again O my little bird Envy-good and how do I love my Child The Gossiips also know it is thus though he has the face to deny it in open Court Then Mr. Tell-truth was called upon to speak what he knew of him So they sware him Then said Mr. Tell-truth My Lord all that the former Witness hath said is true his name is Envy-good the Son of Mr. Dislembler and of Mrs. Hippocrite his mother And I have in former times seen him angry with those that have called him any thing else but Envy-good for hâ— would say that all such did mock and nick-name him but this was in the time when Mr. Envy-good was a great man and when the Informers were the bravest men in Vto â—id Court Gentlemen
and black Silk Stockings a huge Ruff about his neck wrapt on his great head like a wicket-cage a little Hat with brims like the wings of a Doublet wherein he wore a Jewel of Glass as broad as a great Seal After him followed two Boys in Cloaks like Butterflies carrying one of them his cutting Sword of Choler the other his dancing Rapier of delight His Comerade that bare him Company was a jollie light timber'd Jack-a-napes in a Sate of watcheâ— Taffata cut to the skin with a Cloak all to bedawbed with coloured Lace both he and the gowned Brother seemed by their pace as if they had some Suits to Mosieur Boots At length coming near Sir Iohn could discern the first to be a Poet the second a Player the third a Musitian alias the Usher of a Dancing-School Well met Master Poet quoth Sir Iohn and welcom you Friends also though not so particularly known So it is though none of you three be Common-wealths men yet upon urgent necessity we must be forced to employ you We have a Jury to be impannelled immediately which one of you three must help to make up even he which approves himself the honestest man They are all honest men and good Fellows quoth the Attorney therefore it is no great matter whether of them we chuse The Doctors doubt of that quoth the Jugde and I am of a different opinion from you The Poet admited a Iury-man This first whom by his careless slovenly gate at first sight I imagined to be a Poet is a wast-good and an unthrift that is born to make the Taverns rich and himself a Beggar If he have forty pounds in his purse together he puts it not to Usury neither buyes Land nor Merchandise with it but goes to Wenches feeds on Capons and spends ten Pounds on a Supper Why 't is nothing if his Plough goes and his Ink-horn be clear Take one of them worth twenty thousand pound and hang him He is a King of his Pleasure and counts all other Boors and Peasants that though they have Money at command yet know not like him how to domineer with it to any purpose as they should But to speak plain I think him an honest man if he would but live within his compass and generally no mans foe but his own therefore I hold him quoth the Prisoner sit to be of my Jury Nay quoth the Judge I have more mind to these two for this Poet is a proud fellow that because he hath a little wit in his Budget will contemn and mislike that which is Reason and Sence and think we are beholden to him if he do but bestow a fair Look upon us Players and Vshers of Dancing-Schools pretty honest men The Player and the Usher of the Dancing School are plain honest humble men that for a penny or an old cast Suit of Apparrel will do any thing Quoth the Recorder you say Truth they are but too humble for they be so lowly that they be base-minded I mean not in their looks nor apparrel for so they be Peacocks and painted Asses but in their course of Life for they care not how they get crowns I mean how basely so they have them and yet of the two I hold the Player to be the better Christian although he is in his own imagination too full of self-liking and self-love and is unsit to be of the Jury though conceal his faults fopperies in that I have been merry at his Sports only this I must say that plain Countrey Fellows they bring in as Clowns and Fools to laugh at in their Play whereas they get by us and of our Alms the proudest of them all doth live Well to be brief let him trot to the Stage for he shall be none of the Jury And so you Mr. Usher of the Dancing-School you are a leader into all Misrule you instruct Gentlemen to order their feet when you drive them to misorder their Manners you are a bad fellow that stand upon your Tricks and Capers till you make young Gentlemen caper without your Lands Why Sir to be flat with you you live by your Legs ass Jugler by his hand you are given over to the Pomps and Vanities of the world And to be short you are a keeper of Misrule and a lewd fellow and you shall be none of the Quest. Why then quoth the Judg the Poet is he that must make up the four and twentieth He and none but he The Names of the Iury to be impannelled 1 Knight 2 Esquire 3 Gentleman 4 Priest 5 Printer 6 Bookseller 7 Grocer 8 Skinner 9 Dyer 10 Pewterer 11 Sadler 12 Joyner 13 Cutler 14 Plaisterer 15 Saylor 16 Ropemaker 17 Smith 18 Glover 19 Husbandman 20 Shepheard 21 Waterman 22 Waterbearer 23 Bellowes-mender 24 Poet. Then the Judge calling them all together he bade them lay their hands on the Book And first he call'd the Knight and after the rest as they followed in order then he gave them the Charge thus Worshipful Sir with the rest of the Jury whom we have elected of choice honest men whose consciences will deal uprightly in this Trial you and the rest of your Company are here upon your Oath and Oaths to inquire whether Sir Iohn Fraud have deserved Death yea or no If you find him Not guilty of those crimes that are laid to his charge then let him set in his former Estate and allow him reasonable damages Upon this they laid their hands upon the Book and were sworn and departed to the scrutiny of the offender by inquiry amongst themselves not stirring out from the bar but straight returned and the Knight for them as the foremost said thus So it is that we have with equity and conscience considered of the Prisoners Crimes and have upon strict examination found that he deserves death when the Forman had spake those words the Judge stood up and pronounc'd this Sentence Sir Iohn Fraud you have been here indicted arraigned and tryed for your Life and the Jury who have gone according to Evidence have found you really Guilty of what hath been charg'd upon you and therefore Your Sentence is That you shall be expelled all Kingdoms and Nations and Societies and Countreys for an hundred years and when that time is expired you shall be put to the severest Death that can be thought on or invented by poor abused wronged Citizens Gentlemen Yeomen and Farmers The Prisoner left in the Executioners hands And so to conclude the poor condemned Prisoner was left to the Mercy of the Executioner FINIS The Pope Arraigned and Indicted The Pope's Petition A Iury against Pope Innocent By these twelve means the Pope may be confuted Holy Scripture is excepted against for Papists may be confuted by their own Translation