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ID	Title	Author	Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication)	STC	Words	Pages
A75929	A Christian family builded by God, directing all governours of families how to act. 1. Gods timber and framing. 2. Gods foundation and upper building. 3. Gods finishing. 4. Gods furnishing. The sum whereof is shewed after the epistle. By Robert Abbott, Pastour of the Church of God at Austines, near Pauls gate in Watling-street in London.	Abbot, Robert, 1588?-1662?	1653 (1653)	Wing A68; Thomason E1233_2; ESTC R6379	56,335	120

A Christian FAMILY BVILDED BY GOD Directing all Governours of Families how to act 1. Gods Timber and framing 2. Gods Foundation and upper building 3. Gods Finishing 4. Gods Furnishing The sum whereof is shewed after the Epistle BY ROBERT ABBOTT Pastour of the Church of God at Austines near Pauls gate in Watling-street in London LONDON Printed by J. L. for Philemon Stephens at the gilded Lion in Pauls Church-yard 165● TO His dearly beloved FLOCK my good people of Austines near Paul's stump in London ROBERT ABBOTT Their aged and unworthy Pastour humbly wisheth all happinesse Externall Internall Eternall Dearly beloved in Christ our common SAVIOUR I Know not how little time I shall be with you here nor how soon I shall goe home and be no more seen I speak not this of going to another place I am weary with tumbling or of not being seen among you here but of going the way of all the earth and not being seen after the manner of the living The Iewes in the midst of their worst troubles except the last complained that they had no Prophet none that could tell them how long I complain not because it is an advantage not to know that time that I may expect and prepare for it every day but I am sure that none except God be pleased to reveal it can tell my time of abode in this earthly Tabernacle I have now lived two above the great Clymacterieall year and it is a great wonder to me that amidst so many vexations and sadding griefes of mind so many troubles and tossings of body and so many weaknesses of mould and temper I should live even to this houre But God will have it so who still cuts out some work for me to do I am humbly content and doe with all chearfulnesse submit to our good God's pleasure Though I desire rest yet I refuse not labour at his command or at his pointing providence I confesse that three things might put my heart upon the wing to be gone to my Christ the burthen of Crosses the burthen of the Churches afflictions and the burthen of Impotent age and two things might discourage me from any further working in this shop below the contempt of the Ministery and the poorenesse of the encouragements that Ministers have from the most that hear them But when I looke upon the place where God hath unexpectedly pitched me and the loving persons for the greater part over whom God hath made me an Overseer as I doe from Lords day to Lords day chearfully work for the good of your souls besides at other private opportunities to doe you good So am I willing as I am able to leave some testimoniall of my love to you and care over you when I have made my bed in darknesse If our good God In whose hands are our dayes and wayes shall adde years to my few and evill dayes I may be able by his blessed assistance to shew it in some more spirituall and valuable piece In the mean time as I am so is this little Book which I here present yours And if it may set you but one staff or round in the ladder of life nearer to your happy journeyes end I shall abundantly rejoyce over you and in you You know that the first government that ever was in this world was in a Family and the first disorder that ever was in the world was in a Family and all the disorders that ever fell out since sprung from Families If Families had been better Churches and Common-wealths all along had prospered As we read it was in Athens of old the boy ruled the mother the mother ruled the father and he ruled the whole City and thence sprung many disorders which made those present times sick of them even to complaining so hath it been in all ages and I am sure it hath been in ours all we that live here groan under it still even to more then a complaint Had young and old been right set before they entered into a Family Had the Family been founded in marriage in the Lord. Had relations betwixt wife and husband children and parents servants and masters been holily carried on according to the rule of Christ Had the house been furnished with a wise holy and carefull father and mother of the family had it been furnished with a just getting and giving it had bin a thousand times better with Church Common-wealth and Family then it hath been or is yet To this end Christians have I taken this little pains first by preaching then by writing to present this little Treatise unto you Read it over seriously between God and your own souls and when you find any touch of it to strike upon any string in your hearts see what may be done to make your Families better and Doe it It may be ye have been rotten timber when you were put into the Family Oh pray that the Sonne of Righteousnesse would come and bring healing under his wings Or it may be when you were young or old you have not been made suitable to the Word of God pray that now he would write his Law in your hearts to make an alteration by an application of the work of the Spirit Or it may be you have not laid a good foundation for a Family by Marriage in the Lord but have married for money or lust pray that God would forget that and give an after establishment to that which was wickedly done at first Or it may be you have faithlesly and unconscionably carried your selves in your relations pray for union with Christ to purge out the wickednesse of nature and with hearty sorrow for what is past you will stand fast in all your relations hereafter Or it may be for want of a good Master and Mistres there hath been no good order in the Family either every day or on the Lords day pray that God would rule in their hearts that God may rule in their house till they may be saluted The Church that is in thy house Or it may be for want of true justice both in lending borrowing buying selling letting hiring and giving the wages of iniquitie are yet in your houses Oh pray that there be not self-seeking nor deceit no coloured covetousnesse nor any thing that savours of injurious evil to be found amongst you If God will blesse you by this Book or any other means doe what you can to be built by God in your Families Thus God will prosper the worke of his own hands upon you and bring out of your Families blessings to the Church and Common-wealth as well as to you This God requires this I aimed at among you and for this while I am you shall have the prayers Christians of Your loving Pastour for Christs sake and by his appointment ROBERT ABBOTT The sum of this following Book which is in stead of a generall Table referring to every Section Psalme 127. 1. 1 An Introduction Page 1. A Traction wherein 2 1 The

11. 10. full of pride and presumption as he vthat said to Christ All these have I kept from my youth when he had not kept one They are inconsiderate as that yong fool who was led by the harlot as an Ox to the slaughter They Prov. 7. swell with rashnesse as Rehoboams green Counsellers Indeed that age is like a seething pot which casts out scum Therefore God mocks them Reioyce O yong man in thy youth Eccles 11. but remember thou shalt come to judgement and warns them sadly to be sober and to flie the lusts of youth 3. They must honour the persons of the aged Old men are Fathers and old age is a blessing in it self therefore it should be reverenced by rising up before them by being silent before them as Elihu and by submitting Job 32. 4 6. to them with a submission of reverence Thus is Gods timber framed and made fit for Gods building in a Family SECT 8. 2. VVE now come to the setting up of this building of God And because every house consists of a Foundation and an upper building this must have both The Foundation is Marriage in the Lord about which consider two things 1. VVhat Marriage in the Lord is 2. How it mny be so undertaken as it may be a good Foundation of Gods building 1. Marriage in the Lord is a Covenant of God whereby all sorts of fit couples may of two be made one flesh to multiply an holy seed to avoid fornication and mutually to comfort each other It is a Covenant of God so God calls it when he saith of a loose woman She forgetteth Prov. 2. 17. 1 Cor. 7. 9. the Covenant of her God It is for all fit couples fit I say because not for men and men women and women men and beasts Christians and Infidels for we must not be unequally yoked These fit persons may of two 2 Cor. 6. Gen. 2. 23 24 Mal. 2. 15. 1 Cor. 7. 2. Gen. 24. 67 Ruth 3. 1. be made one flesh to multiply an holy seed to avoid fornication and mutually to comfort each other when the husband is a rest for his wife But to take it up more fully weigh 1. From whence it must be sought 2. Who may seek it 3. How many may make the same Covenant at once 1. It must be sought from God whose Covenant it is Therefore Abrahams servant Gen. 24. 12 60. Gen. 28. 2 3. and Rebekahs friends prayed and when Jacob was sent to Padan Aram upon this account it was with a solemn eye to God Truly no good successe can be expected but Jam. 1. 17. from God and this is the way to comfort against all troubles in the wedded estate yet I doubt we may say as Laban to Iacob in another case it is not the manner of this place Gen. 29. 26. 2. It may be sought of all sorts of persons without exception The Apostles In all Heb. 13. 4. doth include both things and persons And verily it is honourable in all in respect of the Author God the Time Innocencie the Place Paradise and the use and office to encrease the Church I know that Papists say otherwise and make it a means to advance the Doctrine of Daemons but it is but gross hypocrisie to pretend Chastitie for a cover of whoredome Presumptuous pride to offer at greater perfection then was in Paradise and humane Policy to keep wealth together to mate the greatest Princes and kingdoms 3. Though all sorts may seek it yet two onely at once may be made one flesh Hence is it that Polygamy was ever against Levit. 18. 18. Matth. 19. 6 Eph. 5. 31. God his Institution I know that three things may be said to justifie it the example of the Patriarks the speech of Nathan to David and God's Law but all three will be found too weak As to the examples of the Patriarks consider the Original the Event the Ground of their having many wives The Originall was in wicked Lamech who first spake this language Heare yee wives of Gen. 4. 23. Lamech and this is of no credit or comfort The event was never comfortable to Families as ye may see in Lamechs Abrahams Iacobs and Elkanah's The ground was misunderstanding of the promised seeds multiplying which might be conceived not to be made good without many wives This it pleased God to pass over as the fruit of their ignorance especially it carrying punishment in the mouth of it to make them and us wiser As to the speech of Nathan to David God 2 Sam. 12. 8. gave thee thy lords wives into thy bosome it pretends to convince David that God gave them under his hand government and authoritie or that God permitted him to take Livery and seisin of his Kingdome according to the guise of that time which was by taking the wives and concubines of his predecessours This was the reason that Adoniah desired Abishag and Absalon went in unto his fathers concubines All this comes far short of proving lawfulness As to that Law in Deut. 21. 15 16. which God takes order for one that had two wives and children by them God commanded it not to be done but when it was done he provided a law to prevent the greatest confusion 2. How marriage may be so undertaken as it may be in the Lord to us By going along with God 1. In the Antecedents 2. In the Concomitants 3. In the Consequents of it 1. The Antecedents of an holy marriage are A right choice by the right marks As for a right choice 1. You must not choose within the degrees prohibited 2. You must look more to inward goodness then to outward goods 1. The Degrees prohibited wherein you Levit. 18. 6 7. c. may not chuse are set down in the Law Object If you say these are Levitical and do not bind us Sol. That is not so for the Canaanites who were not tied to Levitical Lawes were rooted out for not observing them And Iohn Baptist Verse 3. 24 25. urged the same Law in the New Testament against Herod yea and Nature it self hath Mark 6. 18. abhorred such conjunctions which have been prohibited by Heathens Object You will say Adams sonnes married with their sisters Sol. True but that could not be avoyded without another creation when God had once given a Law of multiplication but yet that was repealed by God afterwards to which we must stick If ye say that after that time Abraham married Sarah whow he calls his sister True Gen. 20. 12 but sister was a name common to kindred of that sexe and these that were brought up in the Family as Sarah was in Abrahams fathers house and this is without doubt that God tolerated many things then which he did not approve which the learned call toleration without approbation Object But say you Is it not plainly said Thou shalt not discover the shame of thy brothers wife

Lords prisoners by sicknesse in truth not pretended when they are to rest in the night except in extraordinarie cases and when they are bound according to good orders of the Family to serve the Lord either privately with their masters or publikely upon the Lords day Now thirdly the reasons why servants must thus obey are these 1. Because thus they honour Christ They are more Christs then their masters therefore they obey as the Eph. 6. 6. 1 Pet. 2. 19 20. Col. 3. 24. 1 Pet. 2. 21. servants of Christ 2. Because this is acceptable to God and he will pay better wages then men for they shall receive the reward of inheritance 3. Because thereunto they are called and heartned by Christs example who served to the uttermost for our good Oh that all servants would learn to be better servants then they are or have been according to these directions I am sure if they doe not at the last they will lie down in sorrow Oh that they would carefully studie the lessons of servants as they are laid Col. 3. 1 Pet. 2. Tit. 2 Eph. 6. down in the good word of God! Oh that the patterns of noble servants in the Scripture lay before them as of Eliezer Abrahams servant that faithful praying and diligent man and of Jacob when he was a servant to Laban and of the Centurions servants who were at such a punctual beck Oh that they would never forget Pauls motive That you Gen. 24. Gen. 31. Matth. 8. Tit. 2. 10. may adorn the Doctrine of God our Saviour in all things Oh that they would think what a disgrace it is for unworthy servants to live under the blessed beams of this Gospel of light and life Certainly if God set these things home they would alter their course and be obedient according to Christs will SECT 16. 2. MAsters must give unto their servants that which is just and equal Masters Col. 4. 1. must make it their first care to chuse servants aright How watchful was David for this when he said No deceitful person shall live in my sight he that telleth lies shall not abide before Psalm 101. me Truely so should it be with all masters This will blesse their state as we see in Jacob and Joseph and the contrarie will poyson children and all the comforts of our Families I heartily pray that men may be as warie to chuse them as they are to chuse sheep and swine and dogs and horses according to their races And having chosen them that they would 1. Give them that which is iust 2. Give to them that which is equal 1. Masters must give to them that which is just that is what is due to them by positive lawes This they must perform both 1. In Thought 2. In Words 3. And in Deeds 1. In Thought not thinking to exercise absolute dominion over them but such as they must account for to God therefore the Apostle Eph. 6. 9. useth this motive knowing that ye have a master in heaven 2. In words both in commands and instructions Pia possibilia proportionalia The masters commands must be pious possible and proportionable They must be pious that is things agreeable to Gods will not as Sauls was to Doeg to fall upon 1 Sam. 22. 18. 2 Sam. 13. the Lords Priests nor as Absolons to his servants to kill Amnon They must be possible of things feazable Therefore when Eliezer suspected the possibilitie of his doing after Abrahams command he said what if the woman will not follow me Abraham replied Gen. 24. 8. then thou shalt be clear They must be proportionable when they command them labour but not above strength The poor Israelites were servants in Egypt and the Taskmaster Exod. 5. caused them to gather straw and make their old tale of brick this was above strength and so unjust But God saith over your brethren Levit. 25. 46. you shall not rule with rigour or crueltie They must also do justice in instructions Servants must serve their masters as Christ and this they cannot without instructions first Abraham armed all his trained servants that is his Catechized servants whom he had so Gen. 14. 14 well instructed that they would follow him through all dangers and Hezekiah made the servants copy out part of Solomons Proverbs Prov. 25. 1. for their rules to follow If masters take not this course their servants cannot adorn the Doctrine of Christ 3. In deeds as masters must be careful for their servants health if in their service they be sick as that good Centurion was who Matth. 8. 5 6. went to Christ for his help and in providing sufficient meat and drink for them as Solomon did for his workmen and the good housewife 2 Chr. 2. 10 Prov. 31. 15. 1 Cor. 8. 9. for hers according to the equitie of that rule Thou shalt not muzzle the mouth of the Oxe which treadeth out the corn and in providing due punishment for them according to Law when they do amisse by which means masters should be better served so by justly paying them their wages This maketh up a Deut. 15. 13 14. sweet harmony betwixt masters and servants according to that expression of Christ He agreed with them for a penny they make a sweet Matth. 29. 2 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 James 5. 4. symphonie or harmonie betwixt them but the contrary makes a fearful jarre and crie which God hears 2. Masters must give to their servants that which is equal which is due by Charitie and Christian meeknesse For equal doth not comprehend equal honour and equal offices of love that is such as the servants performe to the master for this is a good rule To Inaequalibus dare aequalia inaequale est give equal things to unequal persons is unequal But it is to be referred to the mind and manner of doing that as the servant performs his dutie equally so the master must perform his The servant obeyes as to the Lord the master rules as the Lord piously The servant obeyes from the heart willingly the master rules with a mild and fatherly affection Now this equalitie comprehends foure Job 31. 15. Phile. v. 16. Habent cutem communem licet non vestem Job 31. 13. 14. duties 1. To account that servants are of the same mould yea and partakers of the same grace of Christ They have a common skin though not a common covering 2. To hearken to them and yield to them when reason and truth is on their side 3. To have respect to humane infirmities as sicknesse age and passions 4. To give well deserving servants more then is due to them by Covenant and bargain If they be better then servants it is but equal that we be better then masters Oh that all masters would labour to be such I shall give you but three motives 1. Our servants are fellow servants with us to God If the Angel said to John