me the Light of the Sun than the Light of thy Countenance Less miserable had I been without Life or Being than without thy Grace Without thee and my Saviour's help I can do nothing I did not live without thee I could not pray or learn without thee I never could conquer a temptation without thee and can I die or be prepared to die without thee Alas I shall but say as Philip of Christ I know not whither my Soul is going and how then shall I know the way My Lord having loved his own in the World did love them to the end Thou lovest fidelity and perseverance in thy Servants even those that in his sufferings forsook him and fled yet are commended and rewarded by Christ for continuing with him in his temptations Luk. 22. 28. And wilt thou forsake a sinner in his extremity who consenteth to thy Covenant and would not forsake thee My God I have often sinned against thee but yet thou knowest I would fain be thine I have not served thee with the resolution fidelity and delight as such a Master should have been served but yet I would not forsake thy service nor change my Master or my Work I can say with thy Servant Paul Act. 27. 23. that thou art the GOD WHOSE I AM and WHOM I SERVE and O that I could serve thee better For to serve thee is but to Receive thy Grace and to use it for my own and others good and so to glorifie thee and please thy will which being LOVE it self is pleased best when we receive and do most good I have not loved thee as Infinite Goodness and Love it self and fatherly Bounty should have been loved but yet I would not forsake thy Family and nothing in this World is more my grief than that I love thee no more forsake not then a sinner that would not forsake thee that looketh every hour towards thee that feeleth it as a piece of Hell to be so dark and strange unto thee that gropeth and groaneth and gaspeth after thee feeling to his greatest sorrow though thou art every where that while he is present in the body he is absent from the Lord. My Lord I have nothing to do in this World but to seek and serve thee I have nothing to do with a Heart and its affections but to breath after thee I have nothing to do with my Tongue and Pe◠but to speak to thee and for thee and to publish thy Glory and thy Will What have I to do with all my Reputation and Interest in my Friends but to increase thy Church and propagate thy holy Truth and Service What have I to do with my remaining Time even these last and languishing hours but to look up unto thee and wait for thy Grace and thy Salvation O pardon all my carnal thoughts and all my unthankful neglects of thy precious Grace and Love and all my wilful sin against thy Truth and thee and let the fuller Communications of thy forfeited Grace now tell me by experience that thou dost forgive me Even under the terrible Law thou didst tell Man thy very Nature by proclaiming thy Name Exod. 34 6 7. The Lord the Lord God merciful and gracious long-suffering and abundant in goodness and Truth keeping mercy for thousands forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin and is not the Grace of our Lord Jesus Christ revealed in the Gospel for our more abundant Faith and Consolation My God I know as I cannot Love thee according to thy Loveliness so I cannot Trust thee according to thy Faithfulness I can never be sufficiently confident of thy alsufficient Power thy Wisdom and thy Goodness When I have said as Psal 77. 7. Will the Lord cast off for ever and will he be favourable no more Is his mercy clean gone for ever doth his Promise fail to Generations hath God forgotten to be gracious hath he in anger shut up his tender mercies Conscience hath replied that This is my infirmity I never wanted comfort because thou wantedst mercy but because I wanted Faith and fitness to receive it and perceive it But hast thou not mercy also to give me even that Fitness and that Faith My God all is of thee and through thee and all is to thee and when I have the felicity the Glory of all for ever will be thine None that trusteth in thee according to thy Nature and Promise shall be ashamed If I can live and die in Trusting in thee surely I shall not be confounded § 12. Why then should it seem a difficult Question how I may willingly leave this World and my Soul depart to Christ in Peace The same Grace which regenerated me must bring me to my desired end as the same Principle of Vegetation which causeth the Bud must bring the Fruit to sweet maturity 1. BELIEVE and TRUST thy Father thy Saviour and thy Comforter II. And HOPE for the joyful entertainments of his Love and for the blessed state which he hath promised III. And long by LOVE for nearer Union and Communion with him and thus O my Soul thou mayest depart in Peace I. How sure is the Promise of God How suitable to his Love and to the Nature of our Souls and to the operations of every Grace It is initially performed here whilst our desires are turned towards him and the heavenly seed and spark is here ingenerated in a Soul that was dead and dark and disaffected Is it any strange thing for Fire to ascend yea or the fiery Principle of Vegetation in a Tree to carry up the earthy matter to a great procerity Is it strange that Rivers should hasten to the Sea Whither should Spirits go but to the Region or World of Spirits and whither should Christ's Members and holy Spirits go but to himself and the heavenly Society And is not that a more holy and glorious place and state than this below Earth is between Heaven and Hell a place of gross and passive matter where Spirits may indeed operate upon that which needeth them and where they may be detained a while in such operation or as incorporated Forms if not incarcerate Delinquents but it is not their center end or home Even sight and reason might persuade me that all the noble Invisible powers that operate on this lower World do principally belong unto a higher and what can Earth add to their Essence Dignity or Perfection § 13. But why O my Soul art thou so vainly solicitous to have formal clear distinct conceptions of the Celestial World and the individuation and operations of separated Souls any more than of the Angels While thou art the formal Principle of an animated Body thy conceptions must be but suitable to their present state and use When thou art possessed of a better state thou shalt know it as a possessor ought to do For such a knowledge as thou lookest after is part of the possession And to long to Know and Love in Clearness and Perfection is to
Trust and quietly Trust that Infinite Wisdom Love and Power whom I have so long trusted and found so good Nature teacheth Man to love best those Animals that are tame and tractable that trust us and love us that will come to our hands and love our Company that will be familiar with us and follow us be it Horse or Dog Beasts or Birds But those that are wild and live in Woods and fly from the Face of Man are taken to be the Game and Preys of any one that can catch and kill them And shall my foolish Soul thus wildly fly from the Face of God Shall his Children be like the fearful Hare Or like a guilty Cain Or like an unbelieving Sadduce that either believeth not or hopeth not for the forgiveness of sin and the life Everlasting Doth not the Spirit of Adoption incline us to love our Fathers presence and to be loth to be long from home To distrust all Creatures even thy self is not unreasonable but to distrust God hath no just excuse Fly from Sin from Satan from Temptations from the World from sinful Flesh and Idol-self But fly not from him that is Goodness Love and Joy itself Fear thine Enemy but Trust thy Father If thy Heart be reconciled to Him and his Service by the Spirit he is certainly reconciled to thee through Christ And if he be for thee and justifie and love thee who shall be against thee or condemn thee or separate thee from his Love If thy unreconciled will do make thee doubt of his reconciliation it 's time to abhor and lay by thy Enmity Consent and be sure that he consenteth Be willing to be his and in Holiness to serve him and to be united in joyful Glory to him and then be sure that he is willing to accept thee and receive thee to that Glory O dark and sinful Soul how little dost thou know thy Friend thy Self or God if thou canst more easily and quietly trust thy Life thy Soul and Hopes to the will of thy Friend or of thy self if thou hadst power than to the will of God Every Dog would be at home and with his Master much more every ingenuous Child with his Father And tho Enemies distrust us Wife and Children will not do so while they bâ—lieve us just And hath God ever shewed himself either unfaithful or unmerciful to me To thee O Lord as to a faithful Creator I commit my Soul 1 Pet. 4. 19. I know that thou art the faithful God who keepest Covenant and Mercy with them that love thee and keep thy Commandments Deut. 7. 9. Thou art faithful who hast called me to the communion of thy Son Jesus Christ our Lord 1 Cor. 1. 9. Thy faithfulness hath saved me in and from temptation 1 Cor. 10. 13. It hath stablished me and kept me from prevailing evil 2 Thess 3. 3. And if will keep my Spirit Soul and Body to the coming of Christ 1 Thess 5. 23 24. It is in faithfulness that thou hast afflicted me Ps 119. 75. and shall not I trust thee then to save me It is thy faithful Word that all thine Elect shall obtain the Salvation which is in Christ Jesus with eternal Glory and if we be dead with him shall live with him and if we suffer we shall also reign with him 2 Tim. 2. 10 11 12. To thee O my Saviour I commit my Soul it is thine own by Redemption it is thine own by Covenant It is marked and Sealed by thy Spirit as thine own and thou hast promised not to lose it Joh. 6. 39. Thou wast made like us thy Brethren that thou mightest be a merciful and faithful High Priest in things pertaining to God to make reconciliation for our Sins By thy Blood we have boldness to enter into the Holiest even by the new and living consecrated way Cause me to draw near with a sincere Heart in full assurance of Faith by thee that art the High Priest over the House of God For he is faithful that has promised life through thee Heb. 10. 19 20 21 22 23. Thy Name is Faithful and True Rev. 19. 11. and Faithful and True are all thy Promises Rev. 22. 6. 21. 5. Thou hast promised Rest to weary Souls that come to thee Matth. 11. 28. 2 Thess 1. 7. I am weary of suffering and weary of sin weary of my flesh and weary of my darkness and dulness and distance and of this wicked blind unrighteous and confounded World And whither should I look for Rest but home to my heavenly Father and to Thee I am but a bruised Reed but thou wilt not break me I am but a smoaking Flax but thou wilt not quench what thy Grace hath kindled but thou in whose Name the Nations trust wilt bring forth judgment unto Victory Matth. 12. 20 21. The Lord redeemeth the Souls of his Servants and none of them that trust in thee shall be desolate Psa 34. 22. Therefore will I wait on thy Name for it is good and will trust in the Mercy of God for ever Psal 52. 8 9. The Lord is Good a strong-hold in the day of trouble and he knoweth them that trust in him Nah. 1. 7. sinful fear is a snare but he that putteth his trust in the Lord shall be set on high Prov. 29. 25. Blessed is the Man that maketh the Lord his trust and respecteth not the Proud and such as turn aside to lies Psal 40. 4. Thou art my hope O Lord God thou art my trust from my youthâ— By thee have I been holden up from the Womb my praise shall be continually of thee Cast me not off now in the time of Age forsake me not when my strength faileth O God thou hast taught me from my youth and hitherto have I declared thy wondrous works Now also when I am old and gray O God forsake me not Psal 17. 5 6 9 17 18. Leave not my Soul destitute for mine Eyes are toward thee my trust is in thee Psa 14. 8. I had fainted unless I had believed to see the goodness of the Lord in the Land of the Living Even where they that live shall die no more The Sun may cease to shine on Man and the Earth to bear us but God will never cease to be Love nor to be faithful in his Promises Blessed be the Lord who hath commanded me so safe and quietting a duty as to trust him and cast all my cares on him as on one that hath promised to care for me 11. And blessed be God who hath made it my Duty to HOPE for his Salvation HOPE is the Ease yea the life of our Hearts that else would break yea die within us Despair is no small part of Hell God cherisheth Hope as he is the lover of Souls Satan our Enemy cherisheth Despair when his way of blind Presumption faileth As Fear is a foretast of Evil before it is felt so Hope doth anticipate and foretast Salvation before it is
a Nature to us Else they would not cease at Death But holy LOVE is our New Nature and therefore ceaseth not with this bodily life And shall accidental love make me desire the company of a frail and mutable Friend And shall not this ingrafted inseparable love make me long to be with Christ Though the love of God to all his Creatures will not prove that they are all Immortal nor oblige them to expect another life that never had Capacity or Faculties to expect it yet his love to such as in Nature and Grace are made capable of it doth warrant and oblige them to believe and hope for the full Perfection of the work of love Some comfort themselves in the love of St. Peter as having the Keys of Heaven And how many could I name that are now with Christ who loved me so faithfully on Earth that were I sure they had the Keys and Power of Heaven and were not changed in their Love I could put my departing Soul into their Hands and die with joy And is it not better in the Hand of my Redeemer and of the God of Love and Father of Spirits Is any love comparable to his Or any Friend so boldly to be trusted I should take it for ungrateful unkindness in my Friend to doubt of my love and trustiness if I had given him all that he hath and maintained him constantly by my kindness But O how odious a thing is sin Which by destroying our love to God doth make us unmeer to believe and sweetly perceive his Love And by making us doubt of the Love of God and lose the pleasant relish of it doth more increase our difficulty of loving him The Title that the Angel gave to Daniel A Man greatly beloved of God methinks should be enough to make one joyfully love and trust God both in life and death Will Almighty LOVE ever hurt me or forsake me And have not all Saints that Title in their degrees What else signifieth their Mark and Name HOLINESS TO THE LORD What is it but our separation to God as his peculiar beloved People And how are they separated but by mutual love and our forsaking all that alienateth or is contrary Let Scorners deride us as self flatterers that believe they are God's Darlings and wo to the Hypocrites that believe it on their false Presumption without such belief or grounded hopes I see not how any Man can die in true Peace He that is no otherwise beloved than Hypocrites and Unbelievers must have his portion with them And he that is no otherwise beloved than as the ungodly unholy and unregenerate shall not stand in judgment nor see God nor enter into his Kingdom Most upright Souls are to blame for groundless doubting of God's Love but not for acknowledging it rejoicing in it and in their doubts being most solicitous to make it sure Love brought me into the World and furnished me with a Thousand Mercies Love hath provided for me delivered me and preserved me till now And will it not entertain my separated Soul Is God like false or insufficient Friends that forsake us in adversity I confess that I have wronged LOVE by sin by many and great unexcusable sins But all save Christ himself were sinners which love did purifie and receive to Glory God who is rich in Mercy for the great love wherewith he loved us even when we were dead in sins hath quickned us together with Christ by Grace we are saved and hath raised us up together in heavenly places in Christ Jesus Eph. 2. 4 5 6. O that I could love much that have so much forgiven The glorified praised him who loved us and washed us from our sins in his own Blood and made us Kings and Priests to God Rev. 1. 5 6. Our Father that hath loved us giveth us consolation and good hope through Grace 2 Thess 2. 16. I know no sin which I repent not of with self-loathing And I earnestly beg and labour that none of my sins may be to me unknown I dare not justifie even what is any way uncertain though I dare not call all that my sin which siding men of differing judgments on each side passionately call so While both sides do it on contrary accounts and not to go contrary ways is a Crime O that God would bless my accusations to my illumination that I may not be unknown to my self Though some think me much better than I am and others much worse it most concerneth me to know the Truth my self flattery would be more dangerous to me than false accusations I may safelier be ignorant of other mens sins than of my own Who can understand his errours Cleanse me Lord from secret sins and let not ignorance or errour keep me in impenitence and keep thou me back from presumptuous sins Psal 19. 12 13. I have an Advocate with the Father and thy Promise that he that confesseth and forsaketh his sins shall have Mercy Those are by some men taken for my greatest sins which my most serious Thoughts did judge to be the greatest of my outward duties and which I performed through the greatest difficulties and which cost me dearest to the Flesh and the greatest self-denial and patience in my reluctant Mind Where-ever I have erred Lord make it known to me that my confession may prevent the sin of others and where I have not erred confirm and accept me in the right And seeing an unworthy Worm hath had so many Testimonies of thy tender love let me not be like them Mal. 1. 1 2. that when thou saidst I have loved you unthankfully asked Wherein hast thou loved us Heaven is not more spangled with Stars than thy Word and Works with the refulgent Signatures of Love Thy well beloved Son the Son of thy Love undertaking the Office Message and Work of the greatest Love was full of that Spirit which is Love which he sheds abroad in the Hearts of thine Elect that the Love of the Father the Grace of the Son and the communion of the Spirit may be their hope and life His Works his Sufferings his Gifts as well as his comfortable Word did say to his Disciples Joh. 15. 9. As the Father loved me so have I loved you continue ye in my love And how Lord shall we continue in it but by the thankful belief of thy love and loveliness desiring still to love thee more and in all things to know and please thy Will Which thou knowest is my Souls desire Behold then O my Soul with what Love the Father Son and Holy Spirit have loved thee that thou should be made and called a Son of God redeemed regenerate adopted into that Covenant-state of Grace in which thou standest Rejoice therefore in hope of the Gâ—ory of God Rom. 5. 1 2. being justified by Faith having Peace with God and access by Faith and Hope that maketh not ashamed that being reconciled when an Enemy by the Death of Christ I shall be saved
Nos quâ—que floruimus sed flos fuit ille 〈◊〉 Flâ—mmaque de stipula nostra brepusque fuiâ— Oâ— VERA EFFIGIES RICHARDI BAXTERI MIN IES CH IN OPâ— ET PATâ— FIDEI SPEI ET CHARITATIS AN O 168â— AETAT SUAE â—8 Farewell Vaine World as thou hast bin to me Dust and a Shadow those I leave with thee The vnseen Vitall Substance I committ To him that 's Substance Life-Light-Love to it The Leavs Fruit are dropt for soyle Seed Heavens heirs to generate to heale and feed Them also thou wilt flatter and molest But shalt not keep from Everlasting Râ—st BAXTER'S DYING THOUGHTS UPON PHIL. 1. 23. Written for his own Use in the latter Times of his corporal Pains and Weakness LONDON Printed by Tho. Snowden for B. Simmons at the Three golden Cocks at the West end of St. Pauls 1683. THE PREFACE TO THE READER Reader I Have no other use for a Preface to this Book but to give you a true excuse for its Publication I wrote it for my self unresolved whether any one should ever see it but at last inclined to leave that to the will of my Executors to publish or suppress it when I am dead as they saw cause But my Person being seized on and my Library and all my Goods distrained on by Constables and sold and I constrained to relinquish my House for preaching and being in London I knew not what to do with multitudes of Manuscripâ—â— that had long lain by me having no House to go to but a narrow hired Lodging with strangers Wherefore I cast away whole Volumes which I could not carry away both Controversies and Letters practical and Cases of Conscience but having newly lain divers Weeks Night and Day in waking torments Nephritick and Colick after other long pains and languor I took this Book with me in my removal for my own use in my further sickness Three Weeks after falling into another extream fit and expecting Death where I had no Friend with me to commit my Papers to meerly lest it should be lost I thought best to give it to the Printer I think it is so much of the work of all mens lives to prepare to die with safety and comfort that the same Thoughts may be needful for others that are so for me If any mislike the Title as if it imported that the Author is Dead let him know that I die daily and that which quickly will be almost is It 's suited to my own use They that it is unsuible to may pass it by If those mens lives were spent in serious preparing Thoughts of Death who are now studying to destroy each other and tear in pieces a distressed Land they would prevent much dolorous Repentance R. B. THE CONTENTS Doct. 1. THat the Souls of Believers when departed hence shall be with Christ I. The necessity of believing this proved pag. 1 c. II. Whether it be best believing it without consideration of the difficulties or proofs p. 7. III. The certainty of it manifested 1. From the Immortality of the Soul which is proved p. 11. 1. The Soul is a substance 2. It is a substance formally differenced from lower substance by the Virtue of special Vital Activity Intellect and free will p. 14 3. It is not Annihilated at Death 4. Nor destroyed by dissolution of parts 5. Nor loseth its formal Power or Virtue p. 15. 6. Nor doth sleep or cease to act p. 16. 7. To cease to be Individuate by Vnion with any other common Spirit is not to be feared were it true p. 19. But it is not like to be true p. 31 c. II. The second proof It is a natural notice p. 33. III. From the duty of all men to seek a future happinessm p. 34. IV. From Man's capacity of knowing God c. as differenced from Bruits p. 37. V. From Godâ—s governing Justice p. 38. VI. From Revelation supernatural p. 39. VII From God's answering Prayers p. 42. VIII From our present communion with Angels p. 44. IX From Satan's temptations Witches Apparitions c. p. 45. X. Specially from the Operations of God's Spirit on our Souls preparing them for Glory p. 47. Faith excited and Objections answered in the Application The proofs summed up in Order p. 65. Why this Happiness is described by our being vvith Christ 1. What is included in our Being vvith Christ 1. Presence with Christ's glorified Body and Soul and God-head p. 66. 2. Vnion with him in each p. 73. Too near Vnion not to be feared as destroying individuation 3. Communion with him in each active and passive opened p. 74 c. We must DEPART that we may be with Christ I. From what p. 75. 1. From this Body and Life Yet it is far better so to do p. 76. 2. From all the fleshly Pleasures of this Life p. 83. Yet best 3. From the more manly delights of Study Books Friends c. considered 1. Of Knowledge and Books the vanity 2. Of Sermons p. 87. 3. Of Friends and Converse p. 95. 4. Of God's Word and Worship p. 98. Of Theology p. 99. Of my own labours herein p. 103. 6. Notice of the Affairs of the World p. 109. 7. From our Service to the Living p. 112. The Application to my self p. 115. To DEPART and to BE WITH CHRIST IS FAR BETTER or rather to be chosen p. 120. I. Simply better and properly at it is the fulfilling of God's will p. 122. II. Analogically better as it tendeth to the Perfection of the Vniverse and the Church III. Better to my self as to my own felicity p. 124. proved 1. By general Reasons from the efficients and means 2. The final Reasons 3. The constitutive Reasons from the state of my Intellect as to the Iuâ—uitive manner of knowledg and as to the matter Both opened 1. I shall know God better p 144. 2. And God's Works the Vniverse 3. And Jesus Christ 4. And the Church 5. And the Church triumphant the heavenly Jerusalem 6. And all God's Word for Matter and Method 7. God's present Works of Providence 8. The nature and worth of Mercies 9. And my self Body and Soul 10. And my fellow Creatures 11. And what the evil was from which I was delivered enemies dangers sins c. 4. The Constitutive Reasons from the state of my will I. Negatively p. 163. 1. Freed from Temptations of the Flesh World and Devil 2. There will nothing be in it that is against God my Neighbours or my self II. Positively 1. It will be conform to God's will The benefits of this p. 165. Fruition A fixed will The Object 1. God To love him and beloved of him is our end p. 169. He is a suitable full near Object II. The next Object God's golorius Image in the Perfection of the Vniverse p. 171. III. The Church Triumphant p. 174. 1. Jesus Christ 2. Angels 3. Holy Souls The Wills Reception in Glory p. 175. 1. What it is to be loved of God Excitations 179. 2. How
all things And when God sends on a Land the Plagues of Famine Pestilence War Persecution especially a Famine of the Word of God it is a great sin to be insensible of it If any shall say while Heaven is sure we have no cause to accuse God or to cast away comfort hope or duty they say well But if they say Because Heaven is all we must make light of all that befalleth us on Earth They say amiss Good Princes Magistrates and publick Spirited men that promote the safety Peace and true Prosperity of the Common-wealth do thereby very much befriend Religion and mens Salvation and are greatly to be loved and honoured by all If the Civil State called the Common-wealth do miscarry or fall into ruine and calamity the Church will fare the worse for it as the Soul doth by the ruines of the Body The Turkish Muscovite and such other Empires tell us how the Church consumeth and dwindles away into contempt or withered Ceremony and Formality where Tyranny brings Slavery Beggary or long Persecution on the Subjects Doubtless divers passages in the Revelations contain the Churches glorifying of God for their Power and Prosperity on Earth when Emperors became Christians What else can be meant well by Rev. 9. 10. Hath made us Kings and Priests to God and we shall Reign on the Earth but that Christians shall be brought from under Heathen Persecution and have Rule and Sacred Honour in the World some of them being Princes some honoured Church Guides and all a peculiar honoured People And had not Satan found out that cursed way of getting wicked men that hate true godliness and peace into the Sacred places of Princes and Pastors to do his work against Christ as in Christ's Name surely no good Christians would have grudged at the Power of Rulers of State or Church Sure I am that many called Fifth Monarchy men seem to make this their great Hope that Rule shall be in the Hands of Righteous men And I think most Religious Parties would rejoice if those had very great Power whom they take to be the best and trustiest men Which shews that it is not the greatness of Power in most Princes or sound Bishops that they dislike but the badness real or supposed of those whose Power they mislike Who will blame Power to do good Sure the three first and great Petitions of the Lord's Prayer include some temporal welfare of the World and Church without which the Spiritual rarely prospereth extensively though intensively in a few it may since Miracles ceased 4. Be thankful therefore for all the Churches Mercies here on Earth For all the protection of Magistracy the Plenty of Preachers the perservation from Enemies the restraint of Persecution the Concord of Christians and increase of Godliness which in this Land it hath had in our Ages notwithstanding all Satan's malignant rage and all the bloody Wars that have interrupted our tranquillity How many Psalms of joyful thanksgiving be there for Israel's deliverances and the perservation of Zion and God's Worship in his Sanctuary Pray for the Peace of Jerusalem They shall prosper that love it specially that the Gospel is continued while so many rage against it is a Mercy not to be made light of Use IV. Be specially thankful O my Soul that God hath made any use of thee for the Service of his Church on Earth My God my Soul for this doth magnifie thee and my Spirit rejoiceth in the review of thy great undeserved Mercy O what am I whom thou took'st up from the Dunghil or low obscurity that I should live my self in the constant relish of thy Sweet and Sacred Truth and with such encoucouraging success communicate it to others That I must say now my publick work seems ended that these Forty three or Forty four years I have no reason to think that ever I laboured in vain O with what gratitude must I look upon all places where I lived and laboured but above all that place that had my strength I bless thee for the great numbers gone to Heaven and for the continuance of Piety Humiliation Concord and Peace among them And for all that by my Writings have received any saving Light and Grace O my God let not my own Heart be barren while I labour in thy Husbandry to bring others unto Holy fruit Let me not be a stranger to the Life and Power of that saving Truth which I have done so much to communicate to others O let not my own Words and Writings condemn me as void of that Divine and Heavenly Nature and Life which I have said so much for to the World Use V. Stir up then O my Soul thy sincere desires and all thy Faculties to do the remnant of the work of Christ appointed thee on Earth and then joyfully wait for the heavenly Perfection in God's own time Thou canst truly say To live to me is Christ It is his work for which thou livest Thou hast no other business in the World But thou dost his work with the mixture of many oversights and imperfections and too much troublest thy Thoughts distrustfully about God's part who never faileth If thy work be done be thankful for what is past and that thou art come so near the Port of rest If God will add any more to thy daies serve him with double alacrity now thou art so near the end The Prize is almost within sight Time is swift and short Thou hast told others that there is no working in the Grave and that it must be now or never Though the conceit of meriting of commutative Justice be no better than madness dream not that God will save the wicked no nor equally reward the slothful and the diligent because Christ's Righteousness was perfect Paternal Justice maketh difference according to that worthiness which is so denominated by the Law of Grace And as sin is its own punishment Holiness and Obedience is much of its own reward Whatever God appointeth thee to do see that thou do it sincerely and with all thy might If sin dispose men to be angry because it is detected disgraced and resisted if God be pleased their wrath should be patiently born who will shortly be far more angry with themselves If slander and obloquy survive so will the better effects on those that are converted And there is no comparison between these I shall not be hurt when I am with Christ by the Calumnies of men on Earth But the saving benefit will by converted Sinners be enjoyed everlastingly Words and actions are transient things and being once past are nothing But the effect of them on an immortal Soul may be endless All the Sermons that I have preached are nothing now But the Grace of God on Sanctified Souls is the beginning of Eternal life It is unspeakable Mercy to be sincerely thus employed with success therefore I had reason all this while to be in Pauls streight and make no hast in my desires to depart
the wicked to prosecure his Servants to the Death and make duty costly and give no after recompence 6. If he let the most wicked on the Earth pass unpunished or to scape as well hereafter as the best and to live in greater pleasure here The Objections fetcht from the intrinsecal good of Duty I have elsewhere answered § 1. VI. But God hath not left us to the Light of meer Nature as being too dark for men so blind as we The Gospel Revelation is the clear Foundation of our Faith and Hopes Christ hath brought Life and Immortality to Light One from Heaven that is greater than an Angel was sent to tell us what is there and which is the way and to secure our hopes He hath risen and conquered death and entered before us as our Captain and Forerunner into the Everlasting habitations And he hath all power in Heaven and Earth and all Judgment is committed to him that he might give Eternal life to his Elect he hath frequently and expresly promised it them that they shall live because he liveth and shall not perish but have Everlasting life And how fully he hath proved and sealed the Truth of his Word and Office to us I have so largely opened in my Reasons of the Christian Religion and unreasonableness of Infidelity and in my Life of Faith c. and since in my Houshold Catechizing that I will not here repeat it § 2. And as all his Word is full of promises of our future Glory at the Resurrection so we are not without assurance that at Death the departing Soul doth enter upon a State of Joy and Blessedness For 1. He expresly promised the penitent crucified Thief This day shalt thou be with me in Paradise Luk. 23. 2. He gave us the Narrative or Parable of the damned sensualist and of Lazarus Luk. 16. to instruct us and not to deceive us 3. He tells the Sadduces that God is not the God of the Dead as his Subjects and Beneficiaries but of the Living Mat. 22. 32. 4. Henoch and Elias were taken up to Heaven and Moses that died appeared with Elias on the Mount Mat. 17. 5. He telleth us Luk. 12. 4. that they that kill the Body are not able to kill the Soul 6. And Christ's own Soul was commended into his Father's hands Luk. 23. 46. and was in Paradise when his Body was in the Grave to shew us what shall become of ours 7. And he hath promised that Where he is there shall his Servant be also Joh. 12. 26. And that the life here begun in us is Eternal life and that he that believeth in him shall not die but shall live by him as he liveth by the Father for he dwelleth in God and God in him and in Christ and Christ in him Joh. 17. 3. 6. 54. 3. 16 36. 6. 47 56 57 50. 1 Joh. 4. 5. 13. Luk. 17. 21. Rom. 14. 17. 8. And accordingly Stephen that saw Heaven opened prayed the Lord Jesus to receive his Spirit Act. 7. 5. 59. 9. And we are come to Mount Sion c. to an innumerable Company of Angels and to the Spirits of the Just made perfect Heb. 12. 22 23. 10. And Paul here desireth to depart and be with Christ as far better And to be absent from the Body and be present with the Lord 2 Cor. 5. 8. 11. And the dead that die in the Lord are blessed from henceforth that they may rest from their labours and their works follow them 12. And if the disobedient Spirits be in Prison and the Cities of Sodom and Gomorrah suffer the vengeance of eternal Fire 1 Pet. 3. 19. Jude 7. then the Just have eternal Life And if the Jews had not thought the Soul immortal Saul had not desired the Witch to call up Samuel to speak with him The rest I now pass by We have many great and precious promises on which a departed Soul may trust 13. And Luk. 16. 9. Christ expresly saith that when we fail that is must leave this World we shall be received into the Everlasting habitations § 1. VII And it is not nothing to encourage us to hope in him that hath made all these Promises when we find how he heareth Prayers in this life and thereby assureth his Servants that he is their true and faithful Saviour We are apt in our distress to cry loud for Mercy and deliverances and when humane help faileth to promise God that if he now will save us we will thankfully acknowledg it his work and yet when we are delivered to return not only to security but to ingratitude and think that our deliverance came but in the course of common Providence and not indeed as an answer to our Prayers And therefore God in Mercy reneweth both our distresses and our deliverances that what once or twice will not convince us of many and great deliverances may This is my own case O how oft have I cryed to him when men and means were nothing and when no help in second Causes did appear and how oft and suddenly and mercifully hath he delivered me What sudden ease what removal of long afflictions have I had such extraordinary changes and beyond my own and others expectations when many plain-hearted upright Christians have by Fasting and Prayer sought God on my behalf as have over and over convinced me of Special Providence and that God is indeed a hearer of Prayers And wonders I have seen done for others also upon such Prayer more than for my self Yea and wonders for the Church and publick Societies Though I and others are too like those Israelites Psal 78. who cried to God in their troubles and he oft delivered them out of their distress but they quickly for got this Mercies and their Convictions Purposes and Promises when they should have praised the Lord for his Goodness and declared his works with thanksgiving to the Sons of Men. And what were all these Answers and Mercies but the fruits of Christ's Power Fidelity and Love the fulfilling of his Promises and the earnest of the greater blessings of Immortality which the same Promises give me Title to I know that no Promise of hearing Prayer setteth up our wills in absoluteness or above God's as if every will of our must be fulfilled if we do but put it into a fervent or confident Prayer But if we ask any thing through Christ according to his will expressed in his Promise he will hear us If a sinful love of this present life or of Ease or Wealth or Honour should cause me to pray to God against Death or against all sickness want reproach or other Trials as if I must live here in Prosperity for ever if I ask it this sinful desire and expectation is not the work of Faith but of Presumption What if God will not abate me my last or daily pains What if he will continue my life no longer who ever pray for
cryed up and his Party praised as the chiefest Saints But all that tendeth to the praise of those that he dissenteth from and accounteth adversaries to the Truth is distastful to him as a complying with iniquity and a strengthning of the Enemies of Christ And all that uncharitableness which he expecteth from us against others is as much expected by others as against him and such as he This Day while I am writing these words my Pockets are too full of Letters sent me on one side importunately charging it on me as my duty to conform to the Oaths Declarations Covenants and Practises now imposed or else to give over preaching which would please them and on the other side vehemently censuring me as guilty of grievous sin for declaring my judgment for so much of Conformity as I have done and charging me by Predictions as guilty of the Sufferings of all that are otherwise minded for communicating in the Sacrament and the common Prayers of the Church and others in the mid way persuading me equally to bear my Testimony against unjust Separation and Persecution and to endeavour still if possible to save a self destroying People from the tearing fury of these two extreams And how should I answer these contrary expectations or escape the Censures of such expectants And it hath pleased God who Thirty Years and more hath tryed me by humane Applause of late in this City where multitudes of Persons of contrary Minds are like Passengers in crowded Streets still jostling and offending one another to exercise me with mens daily backbitings and cavils And so many have chosen me for the subject of their Discourse that I may say as Paul 1 Cor. 4. 9 10 c. We are made a Spectacle or Theatre to the World and to Angels and to men We are Fools for Christs sake but ye are wise in Christ c. Did I not live out of the noise in retirement and taken up with pain and expectations of my change what an annoyance to me would it be to hear Religious Persons that have a God a Christ a Heaven to talk of to abuse their Time and Tongues in so much talking of one so inconsiderable and that hath so little to do with them or they with him while with some overvaluing me and others still quarrelling I am the matter of their idle sinful talk The Persecutors for divers Years after first silencing if not still and the Separatists for two or three Years last past have been possessed with so strange a jealousie and quarrelsom a disposition against me that they seem to take it for their Interest to promote my defamation and for much of their work to search what may afford them any matter of accusation in every Sermon that I preach and every Book that I write And though the fury of the Persecutors be such as maketh them much uncapable of such converse and sober consideration as is needful to their true information and satisfaction yet most of the more Religious Cavillers are satisfied as soon as I have spoken with them and all endeth in a putarem or non putarem For want of accurateness and patience they judge rashly before they understand and when they understand confess their errour and yet many go on and take no warning after many times conviction of their mistake Even in Books that are still before their Eyes as well as in transient words in Sermons they heedlesly leave out or put in or alter and misreport plain words and with confidence affirm those things to have been said that never were said but perhaps the contrary And when all People will judg of the good or evil of our words as they think we have Reason to use them or forbear them how can we satisfie men that are out of our hearing and to whom we cannot tell our Reasons Most men are of private narrow observation judge of the good or hurt that our words do by those that they themselves converse with And when I convince them that my decisions of many questions which they are offended at are true they say It is an unseasonable and a hurtful truth and when I have called them to look further abroad in the World and told them my Reasons they say Had these been all set down men would have been satisfied And on how hard terms do we instruct such Persons whose narrow understandings cannot know obvious Reasons of what we say till they are particularly told them And so to tell men the Reasons of all that such can quarrel with will make every Book to swell with Commentaries to such a bigness as they can neither buy nor read And they come not to us to know our Reasons nor have we leisure to open them to every single Person And thus suspicious men when their understandings want the humbling acquaintance with their ignorance and their Consciences that tenderness which should restrain them from rash judging go on to accuse such needful Truths of which they know not the use and reason And what Man living hath the leisure and opportunity to acquaint all the ignorant Persons in City and Countrey with all the Reasons of all that he shall say write or do Or who that writeth not a Page instead of a Sentence can so write that every unprepared Reader shall understand him And what hopes hath that Tutor or School-master of preserving his reputation who shall be accounted erroneous and accused of unsound or injurious Doctrine by every Schollar that understandeth not his words and all the reasons of them But God in great Mercy to me hath made this my Lot not causing but permitting the sins of the contentious that I might before death be better weaned from all below Had my temptations from inordinate Applause had no allay they might have been more dangerously strong Even yet while Church-Dividers on both extreams do make me the Object of their daily obloquy the continued respects of the sober and peaceable are so great as to be a temptation strong enough to so weak a Person to give a check to my desires to leave the World It is long since Riches and worldly Honour appeared to me as they are as not rendring the World much lovely or desireable But the Love and Concord of Religious Persons hath a more amiable Aspect There is so much Holiness in these that I was loth to call them Vanity and Vexation But yet as Flesh and Blood would refer them to selfish Ends and any way value them as a Carnal interest I must so call them and number them with the things that are Loss and Dung Phil. 3. 7 8. Selfishness can serve itself upon things good and holy And if good men and good Books and good Sermons would make the World seem overlovely to us it will be a Mercy of God to abate the temptation And if my Soul looking toward the heavenly Jerusalem be hindred as Paul was in his Journey to Jerusalem Act. 20. 21. by
tell me The Church cannot yet spare you There is yet this and that necessary work to be done There is this and that need c. But 1. Is it we or God that must choose his Servants and cut out their work Whose work am I doing Is it my own or his If his is it not he that must tell me what and when and how long And will not his will and choice be best If I beâ—â—eve not this how do I take him for my God Doth God or I know better what he hath yet to do And who is fittest to do it The Churches Service and benefits must be measured out by our Master and Benefactor and not by our selves 2. What am I to those more excellent Persons whom in all Ages he hath taken out of the World And would mens Thoughts of the Churches needs detain them The poor Heathen Infidel Mahometane Nations have no Preachers of the Gospel And if their need prove not that God will send them such no Countreys need will prove that God will continue them such Many more useful Servants of Christ have died in their youth John Janeway preached but one Sermon Joseph Allen and many another excellent Men died young in the midst of his vigorous successful labours Both of them far more fit for God's work and likely to win Souls and glorifie God than I am or ever was However their greater Light was partly kindled from my lesser Yet did both these under painful consuming languishings of the Flesh die as they had long lived in the lively triumphant Praises of their Redeemer and joyful desires and hopes of Glory And shall I at Sixty seven Years of Age after such a life of unspeakable Mercies and after almost Forty four Years of comfortable help in the Service of my Lord be now afraid of my reward and shrink at the Sentence of Death and still be desiring to stay here upon pretence of further service We know not what is best for the Church as God doth The Church and the World are not Ours but his not our desires but his will must measure out its Mercies We are not so Merciful as he is It is not unmeet for us to desire many things which God will not give nor seeth it meet to grant the particulars of such desires Nothing ever lay so heavy on my Heart as the sin and misery of Mankind and to think how much of the World lyeth in folly and wickedness And for what can I pray so heartily as for the Worlds recovery And it is his will that I should shew a Holy and Universal Love by praying Let thy Name be hallowed Thy Kingdom come and Thy will be done on Earth as it is done in Heaven And yet alas how unlike is Earth to Heaven and what Ignorance Sin Confusions and Cruelties here reign and prosper And unless there be a wonderful change to be expected even as by a general Miracle how little hope appeareth that ever these Prayers should be granted in the things It maketh us better to desire that others may be better But God is the free disposer of his own gifts And it seemeth to be his will that the permitted Ignorance and Confusions of this World should help us the more to value and desire that World of Light Love and Order which he calleth us to prefer and hope for And if I am any way useful to the World it is undeserved Mercy that hath made me so for which I must be thankful But How long I shall be so is not my business to determine but my Lords My many sweet and beautiful Flowers arise and appear in their beauty and sweetness but for one Summers time and they murmur not that they flourish for so short a space The Beasts and Birds and Fishes which I feed on do live till I will have them die And as God will be served and pleased by wonderful variety at once of Animals and Vegetables c. So will he by many successive Generations If one Flower fall or die it sufficeth that others shall Summer after Summer arise from the same root And if my Pears Apples Plums c. fall or serve me when they are ripe it sufficeth that not they but others the next Year shall do the same God will have other Generations to succeed us Let us think him that we have had our time And could we overcome the Grand too little observed Crime of SELFISHNESS and could Love others as our selves and God as God above all the World it would comfort us at Death that others shall survive us and the World shall continue and God will be still God and be glorified in his works And Love will say I shall live in my successors and I shall more than Live in the Life of the World and yet most of all in the eternal Life and Glory of God And God who made us not gods but poor Creatures as it pleased him doth know best our measures And he will not try us with too long a Life of Temptations lest we should grow too familiar where we should be Strangers and utterly Strangers to our home No wonder if that World was ready for a deluge by a deluge of sin in which men lived to Six Seven Eight and Nine hundred Years of Age Had our Great Sensualists any hope of so long a life they were like to be like incarnate Devils and there would be no dwelling near them for the Holy Seed If Angels were among them they would like the Sodâ—mites seek furiously to abuse them Nor will God tire us out with too long a life of earthly sufferings We think short cares and fears and sorrows persecutions sickness and crosses to be long And shall we grudge at the Wisdom and Love which shortneth them Yea though holy duty it self be excellent and sweet yet the weakness of the Flesh maketh us liable to weariness and abateth the willingness of the Spirit And our wise and merciful God will not make our warfare or our race too long lest we be wearied and faint and fall short of the prize By our weariness and complaints and fears and groans one would think that we thought this life too long and yet when we should yield to the call of God we draw back as if we would have it everlasting § 12. Willingly submit then O my Soul It is not thou but this Flesh that must be dissolved this troublesom vile and corruptible Flesh It is but the other half thy meat and drink which thy presence kept longer uncorrupted going after the excremental part Thou diest not when Man the compositum dieth by thy departure And as thou livest not to thy self I die not to my self whether I live or die I am the Lords He that set up the Candle knoweth how long he hath use for the light of it Study thy duty and work while it is Day and let God choose thy time and willingly stand to his disposal The Gospel dieth
out a Prayer Book on my Heart He giveth me desires and he loveth to be importuned by them His Spirit is first a Spirit of supplication and after of Consolation and in both a Spirit of Adoption so far is he from being loth to be troubled with my importunity that he seeketh to me to seek his grace and is displeased with me that I will ask and have no more All this is true But how then cometh my Soul to be yet so low so dark so fond of this wretched Flesh and World and so backward to go home and dwell with Christ Alas a taste of Heaven on Earth is a Mercy too pretious to be cast away upon such as have long grieved and quencht the Spirit and are not by diligent and patient seeking prepared to receive it He that proclaimeth a general Peace will give Peace only to the Sons of Peace If after such unkind neglects such wilful sins as I have been guilty of I should expect to be suddenly in my Saviours Armâ— and to be feasted presently with the first Fruits of Heaven I should look that the Most Holy should too little manifest his hatred of my sin My Conscience remembreth the follies of my Youth and many a later odious sin and telleth me that if Heaven were quite hid from my sight and I should never have a glimpse of the Face of glorious eternal Love it were but just I look upward from Day to Day I groan to see his pleased Face and better to know my God and my home I cry to him daily My God this little is better than all the pleasures of sin My Hopes are better than all the Possessions of this World Thy gracious looks have oft revived me and thy mercies have been unmeasurable to my Soul and Body But O how far short am I of what even Fourty Years ago I hoped sooner to have attained Where is the Peace that passeth Understanding that should keep my Heart and Mind in Christ O where is the seeing the longing the rejoicing and triumphing Faith Where is that pleasant familiarity above that should make a Thought of Christ and Heaven to be sweeter to me than the Thoughts of Friends or Health or all the Prosperity and Pleasure of this World Do those that dwell in God and God in them and have their Hearts and Conversations in Heaven attain to no more clear and satisfying perceptions of that blessed state than I have yet attained Is there no more acquaintance above to be here expected No livelier sense of future joyes No sweeter foretast Nor fuller silencing of doubts and fears I am not so loth to go to a Friend nor to the Bed where I oft spend the Night in restless pains and rolling as I have too often been to come to thee Alas how many of thy Servants are less afraid to go to a Prison than to their God! and had rather be banished to a Land of Strangers than sent to Heaven Lord must I that am called Thy Child and an Heir of Heaven and a Co-heir with Christ have no more acquaintance with my glorified Lord and no more love to Thee that art my portion before I go hence and come before thee Shall I have no more of the heavenly Life and Light and Love Alas I have scarce enough in my Meditations to denominate them truly heavenly Meditations I have scarce enough in a Prayer to make it indeed a heavenly Prayer or in a Sermon to make it a heavenly Sermon And shall I have no more when I come to die Must I go hence so like a stranger to my home Wilt thou take Strangâ—â—â— into Heaven know them as thine that do no better know thee here O my God vouchsafe a Sinner yet more of his Spirit that came down on Earth to call up earthly minds to God and to open Heaven to all Believers O what do I beg for so frequently so earnestly for the sake of my Redeemer as the Spirit of Life and Consolation which may shew me the pleased Face of God and unite all my affections to my glorified Head and draw up this dark and drowsie Soul to love and long to be with thee But alas though these are my daily groans how little yet do I ascend I dare not blame the God of Love He is full and willing I dare not blame my blessed Saviour He hath shewed that he is not backward to do good I dare not accuse the holy Spirit It is his work to sanctifie and comfort Souls If I knew no reason of this my low and dark Estate I must needs conclude that it is somewhat in my self But alas my Conscience wants not matter to satisfie me of the cause Sinful resistance of the Spirit and unthankful neglects of Grace and Glory are undoubtedly the cause But are they not a cause that Mercy can forgive That grace can overcome and may I not yet hope for such a Victory before I die Lord I will lie at thy doors and groan I will pour out my moans before thee I will beg and whatever thou wilt do with me Thou describest the kindness of the Dogs to a Lazarus that lay at a rich Man's Doors in Sores Thou commendest the neighbourly pitty of a Samaritan that took care of a wounded Man Thou condemnest those that will not shew mercy to the poor and needy Thou biddest us Be merciful as our heavenly Father is merciful If we see our Brother have need and shut up the Bowels of our compassion from him it is because thy love dwelleth not in us And shall I wait then at thy Doors in vain and go empty away from such a God when I beg but for that which thou hast commanded me to ask and without which I cannot serve thee or come to thee live or die in a habit beseeming a Member of Christ a Child of God and an Hâ—ir of Heaven O give me the wedding Garment without which I shall but dishonour thy bounteous Feast Let me wear a Livery which becometh thy Family even a Child of God! How oft hast thou commanded 〈◊〉 to Rejoice Yea to rejoice with exceeding and unspeakable joy And how fain would I in this obey thee O that I had more faithfully obeyed thee in other preparatory duties in ruling my Senses my Phantasie my Tongue and in diligent using all thy Talents Then I might more easily have obeyed thee in this Thou knowest Lord that Love and Joy are duties that must have more than a Command O bid me do them with an effecting word How can I Rejoice in Death and Darkness When the Bridegroom is absent I must fast and mourn While I look towards Heaven but through the crevises of this dungeon Flesh my Love and Joy will be but answerable to my Light How long is it since I hoped that I had been translated from the Kingdom of Darkness and delivered from the power of the Prince of Darkness and brought into that Light which is the
shew us whither we must ascend and that after these comfortable words SAY TO MY BRETHREN I ASCEND TO MY FATHER AND YOUR FATHER TO MY GOD AND YOUR GOD Joh. 20. 17. And shall I not follow him through Death and trust such a Guide and Captain of my Salvation 14. He is there to prepare a place for me and will take me to himself And may I not confidently expect it 15. He told a Malefactor on the Cross that he should that day be with him in Paradise to tell believing Sinners what they may expect 16. The Church by the Article of his Descent into Hell hath signified their common belief that his separated Soul had its subsistence and operation and did not sleep or perish to tell us the Immortality of separated Souls 17. His Apostles and other Servants have on earth served him all with these expectations 18. The Spirits of the perfected Just are now in possession of what I hope for And I am a follower of them who by Faith and Patience have attained the promised Felicity And may I not trust him to save me who hath already saved Millions in this way When I could trust a Ferriman to pass me over a River that had safely passed over Thousands before me Or I could trust a Physician who cureth all that he undertaketh of the same Disease 19. I must be at his disposal whether I will or not I shall live while he will and die when he will and go whither he will I may sin and vex my Soul with fears and cares and sorrows but I shall never prevail against his will 20. Therefore there is no Rest for Souls but in the Will of God That will created us and that will did govern us and that will shall be fulfilled on us It was our Efficient and our Regent Cause and it shall be our End Where else is it that we should rest In the will of men or Angels or in our own wills All Creatures are but Creatures And our own Wills have undone us They have misgoverned us and they are our greatest Enemies our Disease our Prison and our Death till they are brought over to the will of God Till then they are like a Foot out of joint like a Child or Subject in Rebellion There is no rectitude or health no order no peace or true felicity but in the Conformity of our wills to the will of God And shall I die in distrustful striving against his will and desiring to keep up my own before it 21. What abundant experience have I had of God's fidelity and love and after all this shall I not trust him His undeserved Mercy gave me being it chose my Parents it gave them a tender love to me and desire of my good it taught them to instruct me early in his Word and to Educate me in his fear It chose me suitable Company and Habitation It gave me betimes a teachable ingeny It chose my School-masters It brought to my Hands many excellent and suitable Books It gave me some profitable publick Teachers It placed me in the best of Lands on Earth and I think in the best of Ages which that Land had seen It did early destroy all great expectations and desires of the World teaching me to bear the Yoak from my youth and causing me rather to groan under my infirmities than to fight with strong and potent Lusts It chastened me betimes but did not destroy me Great Mercy hath trained me up all my daies since I was Nineteen years of Age in the School of Affliction to keep my sluggish Soul awake in the constant expectations of my change and to kill my Pride and overvaluing of this World and to lead all my studies to the most necessary things and as a Spur to excite my Soul to seriousness and especially to save me from the supine neglect and loss of time O what unspeakable Mercy hath a life of constant but gentle Chastisement proved to me It urged me against all dull delays to make my Calling and Election sure and to make ready my accounts as one that must quickly give them up to God The Face of Death and nearness of Eternity did much convince me what Books to read what studies to perfer and prosecute what Company and Conversation to choose It drove me early into the Vineyard of the Lord and taught me to preach as a dying Man to dying men It was Divine Love and Mercy which made Sacred Truth so pleasant to me that my life hath been under all my infirmities almost a constant recreation and delight in its discoveries contemplation and practical use How happy a Teacher have I had What excellent help and sweet illumination How far beyond my expectation hath Divine Mercy encouraged me in his Sacred work How congruously did he choose every place of my Ministration and Habitation to this day without my own forecast or seeking When and where since he first sent me forth did I labour in vain How many are gone to Heaven and how many are in the way to whom he hath blessed the Word which in weakness I did by his Grace and Providence deliver Many good Christians are glad of now and then an Hours time to meditate on God's Word and recreate themselves in his holy worship but God hath allowed and called me to make it the constant business of my life My Library hath afforded me both profitable and pleasant company and help at all times when ever I would use them I have dwelt among the shining Lights which the Learned Wise and Holy men of all Ages have set up and left to illuminate the World How many comfortable Hours have I had in the Society of living Saints and in the love of faithful Friends How many joyful Daies have I had in the solemn Assemblies where God hath been worshipped with seriousness and alacrity by concordant though imperfect Saints Where the Spirit of Christ hath manifested his presence by helping my self and my Brethren in speaking and the People in ready delightful hearing and all of us in loving and gladly receiving his Doctrine Covenant and Laws How unworthy was such a sinful Worm as I who never had any Academical helps nor much from the Mouth of any Teacher that Books should become so great a Blessing to me and that quite beyond my own intentions God should induce or constrain me to provide any such like helps for others How unworthy was I to be kept from the multiplied snares of Sects and Errours which reigned in this Age and to be used as a means for other mens preservation and reduction And to be kept in a love of Unity and Peace How unworthy was I that God should make known to me so much of his reconciling truth while extreams did round about prevail and were commended to the Churches by the advantages of Piety on one side and of worldly Prosperity and Power on the other And the God should use me above thirty Years
possessed It is then worldly Hypocrites Hope that perisheth for all that Hope for true or durable Happiness on Earth in the pleasures of this perishing Flesh must needs be deceived But happy is he that hath the God of Jacob for his help whose Hope is in the Lord his God which made Heaven and Earth which keepeth Truth for ever Ps 146. 5 6. Wo to me were my Hope only in the time and matters of this fleshly life 1 Cor. 15. 19. But the Righteous hath hope in his Death Prov. 14 32. And Hope maketh not ashamed Rom. 5. 5. Blessed is the Man that trusteth in the Lord whose Hope the Lord is Jer. 17. 7. Lay hold then O my Soul upon the Hope which is set before thee Heb. 6. 18. It is thy firm and stedfast Anchor v. 19. without it thou wilt be as a shipwrackt Vessel Thy foundation is sure it is God himself Our Faith and Hope are both in God 1 Pet. 1. 21. It is Jesus our Lord who is risen from the Dead and Reigneth in Glory Lord of all 1 Tim. 1. 1. Yea it is the Christ who by Faith doth dwell within us who is our Hope of Glory Eph. 3. 17. Col. 1. 27. In this Hope which is better than the Law that Moses gave it is that we draw nigh to God Heb. 7. 19. It is the Holy Ghost that is both our Evidence and the Efficient of our Hope Gal. 5. 5. Rom. 8. 16 23. By him we hope for that which we see not and therefore wait in Patience for it v. 24 25. By Hope we are saved It is an encouraging Grace which will make us stir when as despair doth kill endeavours It cureth sloth and makes us diligent and constant to the end and by this doth help us to full assurance Heb. 6. 11 12. It is a desiring Grace and would fain obtain the Glory hoped for It is a quieting and comforting Grace Rom. 15. 4. The God of Hope doth fill us with Joy and Peace in believing that we may abound in hope through the power of the Holy Ghost v. 13. Shake off despondency O my Soul and rejoice in hope of the Glory of God Rom. 5. 2. Believe in Hope though dying Flesh would tell thee that it is against Hope Rom. 4. 18. God that cannot lie hath confirmed his Covenant by his immutable Oath that we might have strong consolation who are fled for refuge to the Hope which is set before us Heb. 6. 18. What blessed preparations are made for our Hope And shall we now let the Tempter shake it or discourage it The abundant Mercy of God the Father hath begotten us again to a lively hope by the Resurrection of Christ to an Inheritance incorruptible and undefiled and that fadeth not away reserved in Heaven for us 1 Pet. 1. 3. Grace teacheth us to deny ungodliness and worldly Lusts and to live soberly righteously and godly in this World as looking for that blessed hope and the glorious appearing of the Great God and our Saviour Tit. 2. 12 13. We are renewed by the Holy Ghost and justified by Grace that we should be made Heirs according to the hope of Eternal life Tit. 3. 6 7. We are illuminated that we may know the hope of Christ's calling and what is the riches of the Glory of his Inheritance in the Saints Eph. 1. 18 19. The Hope that is laid up for us in Heaven is the chief Doctrine of the Gospel which bringeth Life and Immortality into clearer Light Col. 1. 5. 2 Tim. 1. 10. It is for this hope that we keep a Conscience void of offence and that God is served in the World Act. 24. 15 16. 26. 7. wherefore gird up the loins of thy Mind put on this Helmet the hope of Salvation 1 Thes 5. 8. and let not Death seem to thee as it doth to them that have no hope 1 Thess 4. 13. The love of our Father and our Saviour have given us everlasting Consolation and good hope through Graceâ— to comfort our Hearts and stablish them in every good word and work 2 Thess 2. 16 17. Keep therefore the rejoicing of Hope firm to the end Heb. 3. 6. continue grounded and settled in the Faith and be not moved away from the hope of the Gospel Col. 1. 23. 1 Pet. 1. 13. And now Lord what wait I for my hope is in thee Psal 39. 7. Uphold me according to thy Word that I may live and let me not be ashamed of my Hope Psal 119. 116. Though mine Iniquities testifie against me yet O thou that art the hope of of Israel the Saviour thereof in time of trouble be not as a stranger to my Soul Jer. 14. 7 8. Thy Name is called upon by me O forsake me not v. 9. Why have our Eyes beheld thy Wonders and why have we had thy Covenant and thy Mercies but that we might set our hope in God Psal 78. 5 7. Remember the Word to thy Servant upon which thou hast caused me to hope Psal 119. 49. If thou Lord shouldst mark Iniquity O Lord who should stand But there is forgiveness with thee that thou maist be feared I wait for the Lord my Soul doth wait and in his Word do I hope I will hope in the Lord for with him there is Mercy and plenteous Redemption Psal 130. 3 4 5 7. For he taketh pleasure in them that fear him in those that hope in his Mercy Psal 147. 11. Though Flesh and Heart fail the Lord is the Rock of my Heart he is my Portion saith my Soul therefore will I hope in him The Lord is good to them that wait for him to the Soul that seeketh him It is good that I should both hope and quietly wait for the Salvation of the Lord It is good for me that I have born the Yoak in my Youth and that I keep silence and put my Mouth in the Dust if so be there may be hope Psal 73. 26. Lam. 3. 24 25 26 27 29. God need not flatter such Worms as we nor promise us that which he never meaneth to perform He hath laid the rudiments of our hope in a nature capable of desiring seeking and thinking of another life He hath called me by Grace to actual desires and endeavours And some foretasts he hath vouchsafed I look for no Heaven but the Perfection of Divine Life Light and Love in endless Glory with Christ and his holy Ones And this he hath begun in me already And shall I not boldly hope when I have the capacity the promise and the earnest and foretast Is it not God himself that hath caused me to hope was not Nature Promise and Grace from him And can a Soul miscarry and be deceived that departeth hence in a hope of God's own causing and encouraging Lord I have lived in hope I have prayed in hope I have laboured suffered and waited in hope And by thy Grace I will die in hope And is not this according to thy Word and
that I understand and by willing that I will c. 2. I am sure by these Acts that I have the power or faculties to do them For none doth that which it cannot do 3. And I know that it is a substance that hath these powers For nothing can do nothing My Soul then being certainly an intellective Volitive Vital substance 1. I have no reason to think that God who annihilateth not the least Sand will annihilate so noble a substance 2. Nor that he will destroy those Powers which are its Essential form and turn it into some other thing 3. Nor that such Essential powers shall lie as dead unactive and so be continued in vain 4. There remaining therefore nothing uncertain to natural Reason but the continuance of Individuation to separate Souls 1. Apparitions and Wirches cases have put that out of doubt notwithstanding many Fables and Delusions 2. Christ hath put it more out of doubt 3. While substance faculties and acts continue it is the errour of our selfish state in Flesh which maketh any fear too near a Union which shall end our individuation The greatest Union will be the greatest Perfection and no loss to Souls XVII God's wonderful Providences for the Church and single Saints on Earth are such as tell us of that love and care which will bring them afterwards to him XVIII The Nature of God taketh off the terrour of my departure much I am sure I shall die at the will and into the Hand of Infinite Essential Love and Goodness whose love should draw up my longing Soul XIX I am going to a God whose Mercies have â—ong told me that he loveth me better than my dearest Friend doth and better than I love my self and is a far better chooser of my lot XX. As he hath absolute right to dispose of his own so indeed the fulfilling of his Will is the ultimate end of all things and therefore most desirable in itself And his will shall be fulfilled on me XXI I go to a glorified Saviour who came down to fetch me up and hath conquered and sanctified Death and made it my Birth-day for Glory and taketh me for his dear bought own and interest and is in Glory ready to receive his own XXII I go to that Saviour who on the Cross commended his Spirit into his Fathers Hand and taught me with dying Stephen to say Lord Jesus receive my Spirit XXIII I go no solitary untrodden way but follow all the Faithful since the death of Abel to this day save Henoch and Elias who all went by Death into that glorious World where I shall find them XXIV I have so long groaned under a languid Body and in a blind distracted and by Man uncurable World where Satan by Lies Malice and Murder reigneth in alas how many and specially am so weary of my own darkness and sinful imperfection that I have great reason to be willing of deliverance XXV I have had so large a share of Mercies in this World already in time and manifold comforts from God that reason commandeth me to rest in God's time for my removal XXVI I shall leave some fruits not useless to serve the Church when I am gone and if good be done I have my end XXVII When I am gone God will raise up and use others to do his appointed work on Earth And a Church shall be continued to his praise And the Spirits in Heaven will rejoice therein XXVIII When I am gone I shall not wish to be again on Earth XXIX Satan by his temptations and all his instruments would never have done so much as he doth in the World to keep us from Heaven if there were not a Heaven which Conquerors obtain XXX When darkness and uncertainty of the manner of the action and fruition of separated Souls would daunt me it is enough to know explicitely so much as is explicitely revealed and implicitely to trust Christ with all the rest Our Eyes are in our Head who knoweth for us Knowledg of Glory is part of fruition And therefore we must expect here no more than is suited to a life of Faith XXXI All my part is to do my own duty and then trust God obeying his commanding will and fully and joyfully resting in his disposing and rewarding will There is no rest for Souls but in the Will of God and there with full Trust to repose our Souls in Life and at Death is the only way of a safe and comfortable departure XXXII The glorious Marriage day of the Lamb cannot now be far off when the number of the Elect shall be compleat and Christ will come with his glorious Angels and will be glorified in his Saints and admired in all Believers and there shall be a New Heaven and a New Earth wherein dwelleth Righteousness and that Kingdom shall come where that which God hath prepared for them that love him Eye hath not seen Ear hath not heard nor hath it entred into the Heart of Man to have a formal full conception of it Come Lord Jesus come quickly Amen Fear not then O my Soul to lay down this Flesh Mercy hath kept it up for my preparing work but O what a burdensom and chargeable a Companion hath it been Is it better than the dwelling place of perfect Spirits O what are my groans and all my cold and faint Petitions and my dull Thanksgiving to their harmonious joyful Praise If a Day in God's Courts be better than a Thousand what is a Day yea what is Everlastingness in the heavenly Society and Work O how hateful a thing is darkness and unbelief when the remnants of them thus stop poor Souls in their ascent And make us half unwilling to go home What! unwilling to be with my glorified Lord Unwilling to be with Saints and Angels who are all Life Light and Love Unwilling to see the Glory of Jehovah O foolish sinful Soul Hath Christ done so much to purchase the heavenly Glory for thee and now art thou unwilling to go into the possession of it Hast thou been seeking and praying and labouring and suffering so many Years for that which now thou seemest scarce willing to obtain Dost thou not judge thy self unworthy of Eternal Life when thou no more desirest to enjoy it All this is long of thy too much adherence unto SELF and SENSE Thou art still desiring sensitive satisfaction and not content to know thy part wouldst know that for thy self which Christ knoweth for thee As if thou couldst better trust thy self than him Fear not weak Soul it is our Fathers good pleasure to give thee the Kingdom Trust infinite Power Wisdom and Love Trust that faithful gracious Saviour who hath so wonderfully merited to be trusted Trust that promise which never deceived any one and which is confirmed by so many Miracles and by the Oath and by the Spirit of God Whenever thou departest from this house of Flesh the Arms of Mercy are open to embrace thee yea
than long ago Am I at the highest 〈◊〉 Man on Earth can reach and that when I am so dark and low Is there no growth of these apprehensions more to be expected Doth the Soul cease its increase in vigorous Perception when the Body ceaseth its increase or vigor of sensation Must I sit down in so low a measure while I am drawing nearer to the things believed and am almost there where belief must pass into sight and love or must I take up with the passive silence and inactivity which some Fryars persuade us is nearer to Perfection and under pretence of Annihilation and Receptivity let my fluggish Heart alone and say that in this neglect I wait for thy Operations O let not a Soul that is driven from this World and weary of Vanity and can think of little else but immortality that seeks and crys both Night and Day for the heavenly Light and fain would have some foretast of Glory and some more of the first Fruits of the promised joys let not such a Soul either long or cry or strive in vain Punish not my former grieving of thy Spirit by deserting a Soul that cryeth for thy Grace so near its great and unconceivable change Let me not languish in vain desires at the Door of Hope nor pass with doubtful Thoughts and Fears from this Vale of Misery Which should be the Season of Triumphant Faith and Hope and Joy if not when I am entering on the World of Joy O thou that hast left us so many consolatory words of Promise that our joy may be full send O send the promised Comforter without whose approaches and heavenly Beams when all is said and a thousand Thoughts and strivings have been assayed it will still be Night and Winter with the Soul § 19. But have I not expected more particular and more sensitive Conceptions of Heaven and the State of blessed Souls than I should have done and â—emained less satisfied because I expected such distinct Perceptions to my satisfaction which God doth not ordinarily give to Souls in Flesh I fear it hath been too much so A distrust of God and a distrustful desire to know much Good and Evil for our selves as necessary to our quiet and satisfaction was that sin which hath deeply corrupted Man's Nature and is more of our common pravity than is commonly observed I find that this Distrust of God and my Redeemer hath had too great a hand in my desires of a distincter and more sensible Knowledg I know that I should implicitely and absolutely and quietly trust my Soul into my Redeemers Hands of which I must speak more anon And it is not only for the Body but also for the Soul that a distrustful care is our great sin and Misery But yet we must desire that our Knowledge and Belief may be as distinct and particular as God's Revelations are and we can Love no further than we know and the more we know of God and Glory the more we shall love desire and trust him It is a known and not meerly an unknown God and happiness that the Soul doth joyfully desire And if I may not be ambitious of too sensible and distinct Perceptions here of the things unseen yet must I desire and beg the most fervent and sensible Love to them that I am capable of I am willing in part to take up with that unavoidable ignorance and that low degree of such Knowledge which God confineth us to in the Flesh so be it he will give me but such Consolatory foretasts in Love and Joy which such a General imperfect Knowledge may consist with that my Soul may not pass with distrust and terrour but with suitable triumphant Hopes to the Everlasting pleasures O Father of Lights who givest Wisdom to them that ask it of thee shut not up this sinful Soul in darkness Leave me not to grope in unsatisfied doubts at the Door of the Celestial Light Or if my Knowledg must be General let it be clear and powerful and deny me not now the lively exercise of FAITH HOPE and LOVE which are the stirrings of the New Creature and the dawnings of the everlasting Light and the Earnest of the promised Inheritance § 20. But we are oft ready to say with Cicero when he had been reading such as Plato that while the Book is in our Hands we seem confident of our Immortality and when we lay it by our doubts return so our Arguments seem clear and cogent and yet when we think not of them with the best advantage we are oft surprized with Fear lest we should be mistaken and our Hopes be vain and hereupon and from the common fear of Death that even good men too often manifest the Infidels gather that we do but force our Selves into such a Hope as we desire to be true against the tendency of mans Nature and that we were not made for a better World § 21. But this fallacy ariseth from mens not distinguishing 1. sensitive fears from Rational uncertainty or doubts 2. And the mind that is in the darkness of unbelief from that which hath the Light of Faith I find in my self too much of fear when I look into Eternity interrupting and weakening my Desires and Joy But I find that it is very much an irrational sensitive Fear which the Darkness of Man's mind the Greatness of the Change the dreadful Majesty of God and Man's Natural aversness to die do in some degree necessitate even when Reason is fully satisfied that such fears are consistent with certain safety If I were bound with the strongest Chains or stood on the surest Battlements on the top of a Castle or Steeple I could not possibly look down without fear and such as would go near to overcome me and yet I should be rationally sure that I am there fast and safe and cannot fall So is it with our Prospect into the Life to come Fear is oft a necessitated Passion When a Man is certain of his safe Foundation it will violently rob him of the comfort of that Certainty Yea it is a passion that irrationally doth much to corrupt our Reason it self and would make us doubt because we fear though we know not why And a fearful Man doth hardly trust his own apprehensions of his safety but among other Fears is still ready to fear lest he be deceived Like timorous Melancholy Persons about their Bodies who are ready still to think that every little Distemper is a mortal Symptom and that worse is still near them than they feel and they hardly believe any words of hope § 22. And Satan knowing the power of these passions and having easier access to the Sensitive than to the Intellective Faculties doth labour to get in at this back Door and to frighten poor Souls into doubts and unbelief and in timorous Natures he doth it with too great success as to the Consolatory acts of Faith Though yet God's Mercy is wonderfully seen in preserving many
honest tender Souls from the damning part of unbelief and by their fears preserveth them from being bold with sin When many bold and impudent Sinners turn Infidels or Atheists by forfeiting the helps of Grace § 23. And indeed Irrational fears have so much power to raise Doubts that they are seldom separated insomuch that many scarce know or observe the difference between Doubts and Fears And many say they not only fear but doubt when they can scarce tell why as if it were no intellectual act which they meant but an irrational Passion § 24. If therefore my Soul see undeniable Evidence of Immortality and if it be able by irrefragable Argument to prove the future blessedness expected and if it be convinced that God's promises are true and sufficiently sealed and attested by him to warrant the most confident belief and if I trust my Soul and all my hopes upon this word and evidences of Truth it is not then our aversness to die nor the sensible fears of a Soul that looketh into Eternity that invalidate any of the Reasons of my Hope nor prove the unsoundness of my Faith § 25. But yet these Fears do prove its weakness and were they prevalent against the Choice Obedience Resolutions and Endeavours of Faith they would be prevalent against the Truth of Faith or prove its nullity for Faith is Trust and Trust is a securing quieting thing Why are ye fearful O ye of little Faith was a just reproof of Christ to his Disciples when sensible dangers raised up their fears For the established will hath a political or imperfect though not a despotical and absolute Power over our Passions And therefore our fears do shew us our unbelief and stronger Faith is the best means of conquering even irrational fears Why art thou cast down O my Soul and why art thou so disquieted in me Trust in God c. Psal 42. is a needful way of chiding a timorous Heart § 26. And though many say that Faith hath not evidence and think that it is an Assent of the Mind meerly commanded by the Empire of the Will without a knowledg of the Verity of the Testimony yet certainly the same Assent is ordinarily in the Scriptures called indifferently Knowing and Believing And as a bare Command will not cause Love unless we perceive an Amiableness in the Object so a bare Command of the Law or of the Will cannot alone cause Belief unless we perceive a truth in the Testimony believed For it is a Contradiction or an act without its Object And Truth is perceived only so far as it is some way Evident For Evidence is nothing but the objective perceptibility of Truth or that which is Metaphorically called Light So that we must say that Faith hath not sensible Evidence of the invisible things believed but Faith is nothing else but the willing Perception of the Evidence of Truth in the word of the Assertor and a Trust therein We have and must have Evidence that Scripture is God's Word and that his Word is true before by any Command of the Word or Will we can believe it § 27. I do therefore neither despise Evidence as unnecessary nor trust to it alone as the sufficient total cause of my belief For if God's Grace do not open mine Eyes and come down in power upon my Will and insinuate into it a sweet acquaintance with the things unseen and a tast of their Goodness to delight my Soul no Reasons will serve to stablish and comfort me how undeniable soever Reason is fain first to make use of notions words or signs and to know Terms Propositions and Arguments which are but Means to the knowledg of Things is its first employment and that alas which Multitudes of Learned men do take up with But it 's the Illumination of God that must give us an effectual acquaintance with the Things Spiritual and Invisible which these Notions signifie and to which our Organical Knowledg is but a Means § 28. To sum up all That our Hopes of Heaven have a certain ground appeareth I. From Nature II. From Grace III. From other works of Gracious Providence 1. From the Nature of Man 1. Made capable of it 2. Obliged even by the Law of Nature to seek it before all 3. Naturally desiring Perfection 1. Habitual 2. Active 3. And Objective 2. And from the Nature of God 1. As Good and Communicative 2. As Holy and Righteous 3. As Wise making none of his works in vain § 29. II. From Grace 1. Purchasing it 2. Declaring it by a Messenger from Heaven both by Word and by Christ's own and others Resurrection 3. Promising it 4. Sealing that Promise by Miracles there 5. And by the work of Sanctification to the end of the World § 30. III. By subordinate Providence 1. God's actual Governing the World by the hopes and fears of another Life 2. The many helps which he giveth us for a heavenly Life and for attaining it which are not vain 3. Specially the Ministration of Angels and their Love to us and Communion with us 4. And by accident Devils themselves convince us 1. By the Nature of their Temptations 2. By Apparitions and haunting Houses 3. By Witches 4. By Possessions Which though it be but a Satanical Operation on the Body yet is so Extraordinary an Operation that it differeth from the more usual as if I may so compare them God's Spirit so operateth on the Saints that it is called his dwelling in them or possessing them as different from his lower Operations on others § 1. II. Having proved that Faith and Hope have a certain future Happiness to expect the Text directeth me next to consider why it is described by being with Christ viz. I. What is included in our being with Christ II. That we shall be with him III. Why we shall be with him § 2. To be with Christ includeth 1. Presence 2. Union 3. Communion or participation of Felicity with him § 3. 1. Quest Is it Christ's Godhead or his Humane Soul or his Humane Body that we shall be Present with and united to or All Answ It is all but variously § 4. 1. We shall be Present with the Divine Nature of Christ Quest But are we not always so And are not all Creatures so Answ Yes as his Essence comprehendeth all Place and Beings But not as it is Operative and Manifested in and by his Glory Christ directeth our Hearts and Tongues to pray Our Father which art in Heaven And yet he knew that all Place is in and with God Because it is in Heaven that he Gloriously operateth and shineth forth to holy Souls Even as Man's Soul is eminently said to be in the Head because it understandeth and reasoneth in the Head and not in the Foot or Hand though it be also there And as we look a Man in the Face when we talk to him so we look up to Heaven when we pray to God God who is and operateth as the Root of