And now hereby do I know that it was the Spirit of God and of truth that did work at this time because it did lay mee low and flat before him that is holy and made me see my own insufficiency and his great al sufficiency which did much humble mee and broak and melted mee exceedingly then was this promise given in That they that waiton the Lord shall renew their strength they shall mount up with wings as Eagles they shall run and not be weary and they shall walk and not faint And my heart was very much drawn out to wait upon God in a way of believing both for my self and people of God having that word as it were whispered in my ear If thou canst believe all things are possible Another time I was considering that though I had been a Professor many years yet I though indeed I was but a babe in Christ then that word came upon mee Out of the mouthes of babes and sucklings thou hast ordâ—ined praise And indeed I can incourage the most simple and weak to wait on the Lord for his grace is sufficient At this time I was taught by the spirit that prayer was another thing then some take it to be it is of a divine nature and they onely whom God helpeth can pray for it is not words that is alwayes needfull for a soul may pray and utter no words and have sweet communion with God by faith yet words sometimes affect the heart and I have sometimes found the voyce cannot be kept in the heart may be so filled Therefore I blame none but desire to be tender of all for God accepts what himself gives outward performances is as the shell without the kernel if the spirit act not but what of his own spirit is in any duty that God doth accept And we read of the poor woman in the Gospel who met with some discouragements yet by the power of faith being inabled to hold on oh how greatly he commended her faith and answered her desire though her words were but few onely Lord help mee c. And Hannahs prayer was heard who did but move her lips And although she was a woman of a sorrowful spirit before yet she went away believing and also rejoycing that God had heard her prayer So the desires of them that fear him shall be answered and he will hear their cry Daniel before he made his supplication was answered the groaning of the spirit before the Lord is a loud cry the prayer of faith doth save the sick The Lord is a very present help in the time of need They that trust in him shall not be disappointed Nay he takes pleasure in them that fear him and that hopes in his mercy Therefore let them that call on the name of the Lord depart from iniquity Further my heart being carried out long to wait for and expect ther teachings of the spirit more fully to be given mee and therefore if any thing comes in further it is not of nor from my self but the Spirit of Gods working in and upon a poor weak creature who though I be very unfit to publish any thing of this nature to the world yet according to my measure I would with that poor woman do what I can with willingness and cheerfulness for God loves a cheerful heart in his work and the Apostle saith if there be first a willing mind it is accepted according to that a man hath and not according to that he hath not Yet I am much incouraged to believe that this work is of the Lord for I have found the flesh exceeding opposet thereunto and when I have neglected it God hath withdrawn himself from mee and when I set to it in good earnest then God returns and let mee injoy sweet communion with himself And the more the Lord appeared at the first comings in of these things upon my soul the more his love broake my heart that I was wonderfully affected to behold the freeness of his grace to such a one And verily the more watchful I was against sin and unto duty the more of his divine presence was affoarded which is so gloriously sweet to injoy that the more I had the more still I would have and still longed for not onely in the day but in the night also hearkening what God spake and in the night his vvay to my soul hath been to come in vvith many svveet seasonable and povverful instructions stirring me up to pray teaching me hovv to pray and vvhat to pray for encreasing my faith and considence to believe for that I have praied for both for my self and others and also stirring mee up to praysing him and I find that giving my self vvholy to the disposing of God in prayer is a very good thing also this fear hath been upon mee sometimes that I should offer unto God that vvhich cost mee nothing that is to lay on t the choisest and most of the day about the vvorld and then bring the sleepy head to God for a sacrifice I minding the spirituallity of true prayer and my unfitness for it I have found the councel of our Lord Jesus Christ very useful vvhere he saith VVatch and pray Math. 26 41. And the Apostle saith VVatch unto prayer Pet. 1 4 7. yet I have found often when I have been to pray unto God my heart have been very dead and I could not get it into so spiritual a forme as I would yet durst not neglect the dayly waiting upon God in that duty but even then made it my work to petition the Lord to compose my spirit and quicken me by his grace and holy Spirit that I might not offer the blind the halt and lame in sacrifice unto God And indeed then God hath so come in upon my spirit that I haâ—â— had more communion with him self yea more then at some other time when I have been apt to think my self more fit At other times when I have not found God coming in to help mee I have gone a way and waited his time for unless God enlarge our hearts it is not good for us to en large in words for God is in heaven and thou on the earth therefore let thy words befew thy words mark that and bodily exercise prositeth nothing my son give mee thy heart saith God Eccles 5 2. The poor man that said God be merciful unto mee a Sinner went a way more accepted or rather Justified then the Pharise in the time before the coming of Christ in the flesh if Gods people could not bring a lamb fo ra sacriffice if they brought but two pigeons or a little flower if it were brought to the Priest it was accepted so if we come to him that Justifies the ungodly and hath promised to do all our works in us and for us beholding his alsufficiency and submit to him and be content with that he will give us as well in spirit uals as in temperals the Lord will accept of
in giving in such sweet returus of prayer let him alone have the praise and be ye all incouraged and stirred up to pray continually and be very watchful that if at any time God do move you to do any thing do it with all your might according to the assistanco the Lord gives you for I have found it a great grieving of the spirit to put it of with delayes through carnal reasonings of the flesh which indeed vvould have hindreed mee in offering of these few experiences to the view of the vvorld but vvhen God vvas pleased to give me a heart to it and I set upon it vvith a resolution in his strength to go through it not with standing all opposition Oh! then was the Lord pleased to come in again and fill my soul with peace and joy unspeakable and full of glory which was to my great refreshment I being then in a strange Land Holand seperated from Country kindred and fathers house yea there and then did our good God according to what I had wont to have give into my spirit heavenly Allelujas both night and day with many sweet Instructions from him self when it was with us as it were a time of famine of the word our Teathers being removed into corners and thrown into prisons in the Year 1662. O! how was I then stirred up by the teachings of that good Spirit often to praising and often to very earnest prayer as for my self so for his poorasslicted persecuted people and then also I found my heart much enlarged to love and to do good and lay out my self for sa ints of all perswasions yea and all others also as I had opportunity And upon this ground because my dear Redeemer the Lord Jesus hath set mee a pattern to do good to all and what talent soever we do recieve we must lay it out to his praise if it be but one and it shall be increased this I have had experience of be not backward to improve thy talent because another may have more then thou that springs from a root of pride and negligence is the way to loose what thou hast but look up to God for a blessing upon the right use of what thou hast received and if he seeth it good that thou mayest better honnor him with more he will give in thee in his own way and time for then shall ye know if ye follow on to know the Lord. Hose 6. 3. It is also promised that they who be planted in the house of the Lord like a watered Gardin shall they grow and florish and bring forth fruit in their old age Psa 92 12 13. Further o let all the beloved of the Lord take a specialcare of every Gospel ordinance and commandment of our Lord to hold forth what light you have received for there is non of the ordinances of the Gospel to be slighted for they hold out unto us those choyce priviledges that vvere purchased for us vvith the precious blood of Jesus Christ I have found great peace and injoyed much of Gods presence in vvaiting upon him in the vvay of his appointments and I have found the Lord not leaving but teaching of mee vvhen I out of conscience have forborn vvhere they vvere not tobe injoyed according to the rule of the Gospel and expose my self to any suffring to injoy them in the purity of them and indeed God doth take special notice of them vvho they be and vvhere they dvvell Revel 2 13. that in sore persecuting and suffering times hold fast his truths and do not deny his name Mal. 3 16 and hath promised that they vvho keep the vvord of his patience shall be keept in the hour of temptation And vvhen he hath humbled us he vvill shevv us the pattern of his house the goings out and the comings in thereof and the fashions Lawes and ordinances thereof that we may do them Ezek. 43 11. And the time doth hasten that God will turn to the people a pure Language And all shall know the Lord from the least to the greatest And he will lead the blinde in a way that they know not he will make darkness become light and crooked things streight and bitter things sweet and hard things easy and this he will do and not forsake us Further let none be discouraged to do their duty though never so weak yet if thou beest acted by the Spirit of God weak meanes often times becomes effectual to accomplish great things for by experience also I know when some persons have been praying together that one being senceable of the state of the other and mourning over their sin before the Lord God have made use of those very mournings and breathings to convince the other of their sinful state with the danger of it and thereby have been caused to turn from sin unto the Lord whose eyes were never opened before One Maid who by this meanes was convinced and said nothing at present but after prayer retiring herself to her Bible with a purpose to see what word of comfort she could find there and it pleased God to hand to her that place Rom. 8 13. For if ye live after the flesh ye shall die but if ye through the Spirit do mortisy the deeds of the body ye shall live which word God did make very powerful and effectual to help forward his work upon her soul All these speak forth the freeness of Gods rich grace therefore who ever readeth and under standeth what is in this free workings of God good Spirit let him alone have all the praise and glory and the Lord inclined my heart every day more and more to praise him for his unchangeable love in Jesus Christ therefore let them that read this give God praise for this undeserved mercy and let me have a share in your prayers that I may be filled with a spirit of praise for none have more cause then I to speak well of his great and holy name and that I may honour God that little time that I have to live upon the earth and that in all changes For if God sees affliction to be good for mee I desire not to dispise his chastizements for I have found more strength in a great affliction then in a little one and my soul hath been filled with joy out of measure Therefore if we be brought to this take joyfully the spoiling of our goods knowing we have a better inheritance and the giving up all to the will of God who gave all to us we shall have all given to us with advantage oh the fulness of him that filleth all in all but I am nothing and can do nothing no longer then he doth assist therefore praise him for ever more And since I was taken of from my incumbrances in the world and had more time to spend in the wayes and work of God waiting on him for more of himself the Lord according to his promise hath revealed himself more abundantly and I have
us onely believing we must flee unto the hornes of the Althar And I have found when I have neglected prayer my heart hath been very dead and full of unbelief And again I have found it no comfort to rest upon duties for that is a dangerous evil to set up such an Idol in the heart but here in lay my comfort when I by faith could have communion vvith God and coming near to him could cast my burthen upon him and go avvay quiet in my mind that Christ vvould do all for mee and vvhen I vvas vvilling God shtould do vvhat he pleased vvith mee and my vvill vvas brought to his vvill then have I had the mercy I have asked and more also many times I have found retired places and vvatchings the best opportunities and greatest advantages unto prayer Also I have had many temptations against prayer but the best vvay to overcome them is to mind the command of Jesus Christ vvhich is that vve should vvatch unto prayer and pray alvvayes keep close to the duty in the strength of Christ and loose not the motions of the Spirit neither grieve the Spirit by sin but vvatch against all appearances of evil for I hahave found that the neglect of vvatchfulness against sin and being overcome by it doth greatly deaden the heart to duty keep your eyes upon the promises by faith look up unto Christ in prayer and let all take heed of setting up prayer or any other duty above or in the roome of Jesus Christ Iâ— God assist you to pray for a mercy though he give it not in presently yet hold on if your asking be according to his will and your end the glory of God and ye find enlargment from the Spirit of life you may be sure he will be answer you in that thing or else in some thing better for you in his ovvn season My self sought the Lord 20 years for one thing before I had an ansvver but at last being at prayer after I had done God gave mee in a most gracious ansvver and set dovvn the very time of deliverance and did accordingly accomplish it at the very time to him be the praise And many other things I have sought the Lord for and he hath been pleased to grant my desire especially vvhen he hath made me earnest and importunate and have assisted me to hold on and given me a spirit of faith to believe for the thing prayed for Another time I sought the Lord for a relation of mine who was thought to be near unto death and this vvas given in call upon mee in the day of trouble I vvil hâ—ar and deliver and thou shalt glorify mee and â—rom that time that person amended and life vvas continued Also I knew another young person that was by the word preached convinced of her sinsul state and set upon the performance of some duties but not being acquainted with the wiles and temptations of Satan afterward some deadness ceasing upon her spirit began to neglect her duty but one in the family perceiving of it advised her to present her self before the Lord and although she found her self dead yet to pray that she might pray whose conucel shee took and shee continuing diligent the Lord came in by the mighty witness of his spirit fully satisfying her soul in a very short time Further oh let all that fear God be encouraged to continue in and not neglect family duties for I have found by good experience many wrought upon by instructions and prayer when their lot have been cast into those families where reading praying and Catechising and such duties have been faithfully performed ô many young ones have been brought home to God by his blessing upon this meanes And amongst many more I remember one who was very strongly assalted with many temptariones to keep her from coming to and clossing with Jesus Christ and this tâ—mptation was most upon her that she was too young and it would be time enough afterward why should she expose her self to scorne and reproach by being called a Puritan and so become a luaghing stock to others but the Lord was pleased to overcome her and bring her to himself X Another also who set her self against them in the family that wished her soules good and used all meanes to gâ—t out of that family to which end also she raised some lyes which very evil the Lord set upon her heart and then she came to be convinced of her sad sinful state and was also brought home to God through his rich grace in Jesus Christ And another who by this meanes vvas vvrought upon that vvas a young maid a Ministers Daughter and had been vvell instructed and educated from a child vvhereby she vvas informed of the evils of scandalous sins and avoided them and vvas also very constant in the performance of duties and indeed so vvalked as none could see ought a mise in her conversation yet notvvithstanding the poor heart vvas ignorant of her self and of Jesus Christ but she being under a family Catechising and instruction vvas by the mighty povver of the eternal Spirits vvorking convinced of original sin and then she savv that for all her formality she vvas a sinner and had need of a Saviour and so vvas brought home to close with Jesus Christ This also I have found that a constant close secking of God hath been crowned with his presence for I my self was with some others desired to pray to the Lord for councel and direction for them but they would not tell mee in what it was that they sought direction yet notwithstanding I did not know the thing I set my self to seek God for them and he was pleased to shew me what it was this was Anno 1657. and I did pray God to let mee know his mind in that particular and the Lord put it upon my heart to go and read and the place of Scripture handed to mee was quite against their work at that time which they had upon their heart to do then I sought the Lord again and the second answer was go in and â—ead then I looked up to the Lord as I did before and said Lord shew me where I shall read and that Scripture also was flat against their work and just so I had a third answer also And the next day as I was at my work my heart and meditations were above and my secret desire still to God for the further teachings of his good Spirit and these following lines with much more came in as a further answer from the Lord As for the work of Babylon It is a mighty work and strong But yet my power shall it compleat For my wisdom it mighty great They must sit still behold my power VVhich worketh for them hour by hour And novv my dear Christian friends into vvhose hands this my poor mite shall come I desire you take notice of that great love and vvonderful grace of God vvhich he hath been pleased to manifest
is that glorious hold That God vvill keep both safe and sovvnd Zion is that pleasant Plant That God vvill hedg about each hour O! Zion is Gods heritage And he vvill keep it by his povver Therefore let not thy heart novv faint For Zions sake hold not thy peace For our God vvill hear Zions Plaint Therefore give thy God novv no rest Till thou vvith Zion he hath blest Let Zion knovv her time dravves near She may look up novv vvithout fear Let Zion knovv her God doth live That hath her portion for to give Let Zions Children novv rejoyce And lett hem praises sing O! let them lift up pleasant voyce In honnor to their King Let Zion knovv her God is true That vvill her mercies novv renevv She shall receive great things from him Who is her glory and her King Althoug afflictions should hold on And troubles should arise Yet God vvill ovvn his precious one Their prayers hee 'll not despise Our King shall reigne in righteousness His glory shall shine forth He vvill come forth in Iudgment then For his poor saints comfort Our King shall reigne in glory then He shall himself come up His ennemies then shall fall vvith speed And be made but a puf Then let my people quiet sit And vvait on him vvith joy There is a time dravves near at hand Nothing shall them Anoy THE poor then of the flock shall find a rest And I their God and portion will them bless And they shall to me for a refuge fly And I will be their helpe continually Then shall their souls alone in mee rejoyce That I have made of them my onely choyce I vvill sill them in that day vvith my povver So they shall vvait on me then every hour Their soul shall be as vvattered plants vvith devv And I my mercy vvill to them renevv Their heats shall be ingaged vvith my love For I vvill move in them from povver above This is the portion that I novv vvill give Vnto all those that strifes humbly to live Therefore rejoyce in God your onely guide VVhich in this day of trouble vvill you hide END Awake awake put on my strength And mine owne comelyness Look upon mee for I have Wroght thy deliverance Thou art black but comely in Mine eyes that doth behold Thee swearing mine owne righteousness Which glory can not becould I waited long on thee to see When thou wouldst mee â—mbrace And when thou would'st look up to mee To see my glorious face And now what say'st thou unto mee Have I not done thee good And have not spar'd to set thee free 〈◊〉 own Sons pretious blood Therefore let all thy life be now A sacrifice of praise And to my holyness give up Thy self in all my wayes Let not the World so sad thy heart Nor cast thee down solow For â—f thou wait upon my grace My secrets thou shalt know Be watchful and keep do close to meâ— Thy Garments do not staine And that will be to thy poor soul A certain heavenly gain Take heed of glorying in my love But walk humbly and low â—or it is onely my fulness That makes thee thus to flow There is by pathes to wander in That Sathan would advance But I will keep thee by my power And be thy deliverance Be watchful and keep close to mee My Garments do not soyl For they are thine to cover thee Be watchful then a while OH where shall I find now A people quicken'd still That seek all times to live on God And eck to do his will A people that deny them selves And eck the cross up take That doth delight in God alone And eck the World for sake A people that abhor themselves And over their sins weep A people mourning o'r the Land And doth him dayly seek A people that believes in God By faith drawes vertue still Lay hold on promise which is true Contented with his will A people that the word esteem Keeping close there dayly And for a rule the same doth take When others from it fly Their hearts are fastened on the Lord They for are fuge fly That God vvould novv help by his povver In their extremity Their cries are novv unto the Lord Thy seek in him to hide To take of novv his heavy hand And not let vvrath abide With such a people vvould I spend My life and dayes novv here Oh! think upon thy servant Lord And to me novv dravv near I assure you COURTEOUS READER these are not studed things but are given in immediately FIN †For the confirmation hereof do ye mind these two Scriptures Esai 45 13. and Psalm 89 19.