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forget_v to_o acknowledge_v god_n goodness_n in_o bestow_v any_o of_o these_o outward_a thing_n upon_o he_o he_o find_v by_o experience_n that_o they_o be_v but_o uncertain_a riches_n 1_o tim._n 6._o 17._o and_o that_o they_o have_v wing_n and_o will_v fly_v away_o prov._n 23._o 5._o but_o he_o do_v not_o run_v cry_v after_o they_o as_o they_o use_v to_o do_v who_o set_v their_o heart_n upon_o they_o whereas_o he_o see_v and_o acknowledge_v god_n hand_n as_o well_o in_o take_v away_o as_o in_o giving_z as_o job_n do_v job_n 1._o 21._o and_o therefore_o be_v quiet_a and_o content_a have_v experimental_o learn_v in_o some_o good_a measure_n that_o excellent_a lesson_n with_o st_n paul_n i_o have_v learn_v in_o whatsoever_o state_n i_o be_o therewith_o to_o be_v content_a phil._n 4._o 11._o by_o vicissitude_n and_o change_n of_o estate_n god_n do_v exercise_v his_o faith_n patience_n and_o contentation_n have_v pass_v through_o the_o several_a inferior_a office_n he_o at_o last_o ascend_v to_o the_o high_a place_n of_o honour_n in_o the_o city_n parliament_n to_o be_v mayor_n there_o wherein_o as_o have_v be_v show_v he_o demean_v himself_o as_o become_v a_o christian_a magistrate_n and_o his_o ambition_n therein_o be_v high_o to_o honour_n god_n who_o have_v thus_o honour_v he_o and_o afterward_o he_o be_v twice_o choose_v to_o be_v a_o burgess_n of_o parliament_n wherein_o his_o zeal_n for_o god_n and_o against_o the_o corruption_n of_o the_o time_n be_v abundant_o manifest_v he_o be_v a_o great_a stickler_n to_o have_v the_o bill_n pass_v for_o the_o punishment_n of_o adultery_n with_o death_n but_o those_o time_n will_v not_o bear_v it_o sure_o some_o of_o the_o lawmaker_n know_v some_o special_a reason_n for_o it_o when_o he_o make_v a_o motion_n for_o the_o pass_n of_o that_o bill_n one_o or_o more_o of_o the_o member_n in_o the_o house_n cry_v out_o commit_v it_o mr._n jurdain_n commit_v it_o upon_o which_o a_o great_a laughter_n be_v occasion_v whereupon_o he_o present_o say_v unto_o they_o in_o a_o zealous_a manner_n like_o himself_o do_v you_o laugh_v when_o a_o man_n speak_v for_o god_n honour_n courage_n and_o glory_n upon_o which_o there_o be_v a_o more_o than_o ordinary_a silence_n in_o the_o house_n the_o bill_n be_v at_o that_o time_n lay_v aside_o but_o in_o a_o follow_a parliament_n it_o be_v call_v upon_o by_o the_o name_n of_o mr._n jurdain_v bill_n he_o be_v also_o as_o it_o be_v say_v the_o first_o man_n that_o promote_v the_o bill_n for_o the_o more_o strict_a sanctification_n of_o the_o sabbath_n and_o against_o swear_v yea_o god_n do_v not_o only_o advance_v he_o to_o place_n of_o honour_n and_o dignity_n in_o the_o eye_n of_o the_o world_n but_o give_v he_o a_o high_a place_n also_o in_o the_o heart_n of_o his_o people_n and_o therein_o god_n make_v good_a his_o promise_n 1_o sam._n 2._o 30._o such_o as_o honour_v i_o i_o will_v honour_v his_o name_n be_v very_o precious_a in_o the_o esteem_n of_o those_o that_o know_v his_o worth_n both_o while_o he_o live_v and_o since_o his_o death_n indeed_o it_o be_v confess_v that_o he_o be_v a_o byword_n unto_o many_o wicked_a and_o that_o his_o name_n be_v take_v up_o by_o way_n of_o reproach_n but_o it_o be_v by_o such_o as_o be_v upbraid_v and_o reprove_v by_o his_o holy_a and_o gracious_a conversation_n and_o he_o value_v not_o their_o reproach_n know_v that_o his_o lord_n and_o master_n do_v suffer_v much_o more_o in_o this_o kind_n and_o that_o this_o be_v but_o a_o chip_n of_o that_o cross_n which_o as_o he_o be_v command_v he_o be_v willing_a to_o bear_v yea_o he_o be_v well_o content_a to_o drink_v of_o this_o bitter_a cup_n after_o his_o master_n and_o with_o he_o he_o despise_v the_o shame_n heb._n 12._o 2._o which_o the_o man_n of_o the_o world_n cast_v upon_o he_o nay_o he_o account_v it_o his_o honour_n to_o suffer_v shame_n for_o the_o name_n of_o christ_n as_o the_o apostle_n do_v act._n 5._o 4._o but_o some_o there_o be_v that_o bring_v shame_n upon_o themselves_o while_o they_o think_v to_o cast_v contempt_n and_o scorn_v upon_o he_o among_o other_o instance_n this_o one_o be_v remarkable_a that_o be_v choose_v burgess_n for_o the_o parliament_n not_o without_o much_o opposition_n and_o go_v up_o to_o london_n to_o clear_v the_o election_n at_o which_o time_n there_o be_v a_o accusation_n send_v up_o against_o he_o by_o a_o man_n of_o no_o mean_a place_n and_o power_n that_o he_o be_v the_o host_n of_o the_o schismatic_n whereupon_o some_o presume_v that_o he_o will_v have_v be_v send_v back_o with_o disgrace_n and_o according_o there_o be_v a_o sermon_n prepare_v by_o one_o to_o jeer_v he_o at_o his_o return_n this_o be_v his_o text_n psal._n 114._o 5._o what_o ail_v thou_o thou_o jordan_n that_o thou_o be_v drive_v back_o thus_o man_n of_o profane_a spirit_n will_v dare_v to_o make_v the_o sacred_a word_n of_o god_n to_o serve_v their_o own_o base_a lust_n and_o end_n but_o mr._n jurdaine_v instead_o of_o be_v drive_v back_o be_v confirm_v in_o the_o place_n to_o which_o he_o be_v choose_v and_o so_o shame_n be_v cast_v into_o the_o face_n of_o this_o wicked_a scorner_n and_o his_o sermon_n or_o invective_n rather_o prove_v abortive_a and_o as_o mr._n jurdaine_v stand_v up_o bold_o for_o god_n so_o do_v god_n stand_v by_o and_o for_o he_o and_o assist_v he_o and_o carry_v he_o through_o many_o trouble_n and_o danger_n that_o do_v threaten_v and_o even_o compass_v he_o about_o one_o act_n of_o god_n providence_n among_o many_o other_o be_v most_o notable_a in_o deliver_v he_o out_o of_o trouble_n he_o have_v do_v a_o act_n of_o justice_n as_o be_v hint_v before_o in_o punish_v a_o unclean_a person_n who_o offence_n be_v aggravate_v by_o some_o heinous_a circumstance_n be_v move_v with_o a_o holy_a indignation_n against_o the_o offence_n he_o go_v as_o it_o seem_v beside_o the_o letter_n of_o the_o law_n in_o some_o circumstance_n whereupon_o some_o friend_n of_o the_o person_n punish_v be_v stir_v up_o with_o fury_n for_o the_o disgrace_n that_o reflect_v upon_o they_o without_o weigh_v the_o dishonour_n that_o be_v do_v to_o god_n and_o the_o foul_a blot_n that_o be_v cast_v upon_o religion_n resolve_v to_o prosecute_v he_o to_o the_o uttermost_a for_o it_o wherein_o they_o put_v he_o to_o great_a charge_n and_o trouble_v by_o prosecute_a he_o in_o the_o star-chamber_n and_o when_o the_o cause_n be_v to_o come_v to_o a_o final_a determination_n it_o be_v much_o fear_v by_o many_o of_o his_o friend_n and_o through_o the_o boasting_n of_o his_o adversary_n that_o some_o heavy_a censure_n will_v have_v pass_v upon_o he_o to_o his_o crush_a if_o not_o to_o his_o utter_a undo_n but_o when_o his_o friend_n on_o earth_n fail_v he_o flee_v to_o heaven_n for_o succour_n and_o defence_n and_o cry_v unto_o god_n in_o david_n word_n prayer_n psal._n 22._o 11_o 19_o be_v not_o far_o from_o i_o o_o lord_n for_o trouble_n be_v near_o for_o there_o be_v none_o to_o help_v o_o my_o strength_n have_v thou_o to_o help_v i_o and_o he_o set_v apart_o the_o evening_n and_o a_o great_a part_n of_o the_o night_n by_o fast_v and_o prayer_n to_o engage_v god_n of_o his_o side_n who_o have_v the_o heart_n of_o all_o man_n even_o of_o the_o great_a in_o his_o hand_n to_o turn_v they_o as_o he_o please_v prov._n 21._o 1._o and_o behold_v the_o next_o morning_n he_o receive_v a_o real_a and_o gracious_a answer_n from_o heaven_n be_v not_o only_o acquit_v but_o commend_v by_o the_o lord_n keeper_n god_n stir_v up_o the_o heart_n of_o divers_a in_o that_o high_a and_o arbitrary_a court_n to_o speak_v for_o he_o thus_o the_o lord_n be_v a_o very_a present_a help_n to_o he_o in_o the_o time_n of_o trouble_n psalm_n 46._o 1._o after_o he_o be_v thus_o through_o god_n mercy_n free_v and_o return_v to_o his_o house_n he_o pile_v up_o the_o book_n and_o paper_n of_o all_o the_o proceed_n in_o that_o troublesome_a and_o vexatious_a business_n under_o his_o cupboard_n in_o his_o parlour_n which_o be_v the_o place_n to_o which_o he_o do_v often_o resort_n and_o where_o he_o have_v that_o daily_a sweet_a and_o heavenly_a communion_n with_o god_n aforemention_v and_o be_v ask_v the_o reason_n why_o he_o leave_v so_o many_o book_n and_o paper_n to_o lie_v in_o that_o manner_n his_o answer_n be_v these_o i_o keep_v in_o my_o sight_n as_o memorial_n prudence_n and_o monument_n of_o god_n mercy_n in_o free_v i_o from_o my_o trouble_n many_o other_o particular_n may_v be_v instance_a in_o but_o by_o that_o little_a which_o have_v be_v say_v you_o may_v guess_v at_o the_o great_a worth_n of_o this_o holy_a man_n only_o give_v i_o leave_v to_o add_v the_o observation_n and_o testimony_n
the_o godly_a and_o the_o miserable_a condition_n of_o the_o wicked_a in_o their_o death_n and_o so_o for_o ever_o unto_o all_o eternity_n it_o please_v the_o lord_n so_o much_o to_o affect_v my_o heart_n with_o it_o as_o from_o that_o time_n my_o heart_n be_v wrought_v over_o to_o a_o desire_n to_o walk_v in_o the_o way_n of_o god_n but_o at_o that_o time_n i_o fear_v i_o do_v not_o go_v upon_o a_o right_a principle_n for_o i_o then_o do_v not_o eye_n the_o glory_n of_o god_n in_o it_o but_o only_o my_o own_o safety_n that_o it_o may_v be_v well_o with_o i_o for_o ever_o but_o quick_o after_o that_o i_o have_v but_o begin_v to_o set_v my_o face_n towards_o zion_n malice_n i_o be_v set_v upon_o with_o many_o temptation_n and_o perplexity_n in_o my_o thought_n which_o be_v very_o troublesome_a to_o i_o at_o all_o time_n but_o especial_o when_o i_o be_v alone_o the_o consideration_n whereof_o bring_v such_o a_o horror_n upon_o my_o conscience_n insomuch_o as_o i_o do_v not_o know_v what_o to_o do_v that_o little_a i_o have_v whether_o from_o education_n or_o from_o the_o light_n of_o nature_n cause_v a_o strive_v in_o i_o continual_o against_o those_o thought_n of_o atheism_n which_o be_v most_o terrible_a unto_o i_o i_o be_v sensible_a that_o it_o be_v a_o fearful_a sin_n to_o have_v any_o such_o thought_n to_o lodge_v within_o my_o breast_n but_o i_o desire_v from_o my_o soul_n to_o be_v free_v from_o they_o and_o have_v continual_a reason_n within_o i_o against_o they_o and_o yet_o still_o for_o a_o long_a time_n i_o be_v trouble_v but_o can_v not_o acquaint_v any_o with_o my_o condition_n i_o do_v not_o think_v that_o it_o be_v so_o with_o any_o other_o as_o it_o be_v with_o i_o in_o this_o strait_a mercy_n when_o i_o know_v not_o which_o way_n to_o turn_v i_o even_o there_o do_v the_o lord_n extend_v his_o compassion_n towards_o i_o in_o my_o great_a extremity_n in_o direct_v i_o to_o read_v calvin_n institution_n and_o especial_o that_o part_n that_o treat_v of_o the_o creation_n whereupon_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o give_v in_o such_o satisfaction_n to_o my_o soul_n concern_v those_o thing_n about_o which_o i_o be_v trouble_v as_o that_o from_o that_o time_n forward_o i_o be_v not_o violent_o assault_v in_o that_o kind_n but_o no_o soon_o be_v i_o free_v from_o that_o trouble_n but_o new_a one_o spring_v up_o for_o the_o very_a remembrance_n of_o that_o horrid_a sin_n of_o atheism_n subtlety_n leave_v such_o a_o terror_n upon_o my_o spirit_n as_o make_v i_o fear_v that_o i_o have_v commit_v that_o sin_n against_o the_o holy_a ghost_n and_o so_o my_o condition_n seem_v to_o be_v not_o only_o for_o the_o present_a but_z in_o my_o apprehension_n then_o for_o ever_o most_o miserable_a all_o other_o sin_n though_o never_o so_o great_a i_o know_v upon_o true_a repentance_n be_v pardonable_a but_o this_o sin_n that_o i_o lay_v under_o the_o fear_n of_o i_o know_v out_o of_o the_o word_n of_o god_n shall_v never_o be_v pardon_v which_o cause_v many_o sad_a fear_n upon_o my_o spirit_n know_v to_o god_n alone_o for_o the_o removal_n of_o these_o fear_n mercy_n the_o lord_n in_o mercy_n direct_v i_o to_o the_o read_n of_o mr._n scudder_n work_n where_o be_v lay_v down_o the_o mark_n of_o that_o sin_n upon_o perusal_n whereof_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o satisfy_v my_o misgive_a heart_n by_o a_o clear_a manifestation_n to_o my_o soul_n that_o i_o have_v not_o commit_v that_o sin_n and_o so_o assure_v i_o that_o though_o my_o sin_n be_v great_a yet_o be_v they_o pardonable_a which_o put_v i_o more_o cheerful_o upon_o the_o use_n of_o such_o mean_n as_o the_o lord_n have_v direct_v i_o unto_o and_o have_v satisfaction_n give_v in_o concern_v this_o particular_a there_o be_v a_o great_a burden_n take_v off_o from_o my_o spirit_n although_o i_o find_v no_o grace_n in_o my_o heart_n nor_o discovery_n of_o the_o love_n of_o god_n unto_o my_o soul_n yet_o in_o that_o there_o be_v but_o a_o possibility_n there_o be_v a_o ground_n of_o comfort_n administer_v to_o my_o heart_n which_o i_o former_o fear_v that_o i_o shall_v be_v shut_v out_o from_o but_o still_o my_o fear_n remain_v that_o i_o be_v not_o one_o of_o those_o in_o particular_a for_o who_o christ_n die_v the_o more_o i_o look_v into_o my_o own_o heart_n the_o more_o i_o see_v of_o sin_n and_o satan_n discourage_v i_o from_o have_v any_o hope_n that_o the_o lord_n shall_v accept_v of_o such_o a_o vile_a sinful_a wretch_n as_o i_o be_v who_o have_v entertain_v such_o sinful_a thought_n i_o likewise_o think_v how_o small_a the_o number_n be_v of_o those_o that_o shall_v be_v save_v in_o comparison_n of_o other_o and_o my_o repentance_n i_o fear_v come_v short_a of_o that_o which_o be_v require_v in_o the_o gospel_n as_o for_o faith_n i_o can_v not_o find_v the_o least_o measure_n of_o it_o in_o my_o soul_n with_o many_o other_o sad_a discourage_a thought_n but_o when_o i_o be_v most_o perplex_v with_o fear_n and_o doubt_n even_o than_o do_v the_o lord_n gracious_o dart_v in_o some_o beam_n of_o his_o reconcile_a countenance_n as_o i_o be_v read_v something_o in_o mr._n scudder_n christian_n daily_o walk_v etc._n etc._n which_o the_o lord_n set_v home_o upon_o my_o soul_n joy_n and_o bring_v into_o my_o soul_n so_o much_o joy_n and_o comfort_n at_o the_o present_a as_o neither_o my_o tongue_n nor_o pen_n can_v express_v but_o this_o joy_n remain_v not_o long_o for_o i_o quick_o lose_v the_o sense_n of_o it_o yet_o the_o remembrance_n of_o it_o be_v sweet_a unto_o i_o at_o all_o time_n but_o after_o this_o all_o my_o former_a fear_n return_v afresh_o again_o upon_o my_o heart_n only_o i_o have_v a_o door_n of_o hope_n open_v that_o when_o god_n see_v it_o best_o for_o i_o he_o will_v return_v and_o renew_v his_o reconcile_a countenance_n unto_o my_o soul_n in_o the_o clear_a light_n and_o apprehension_n thereof_o and_o this_o be_v when_o i_o be_v about_o sixteen_o year_n of_o age_n after_o which_o time_n the_o lord_n do_v exercise_v i_o with_o various_a dispensation_n for_o for_o two_o year_n space_n i_o be_v by_o providence_n cast_v upon_o a_o place_n where_o i_o hear_v very_o little_a powerful_a preach_v small_a help_n for_o the_o good_a of_o my_o soul_n but_o what_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o give_v in_o by_o the_o use_n of_o private_a mean_n but_o his_o power_n and_o abundant_a mercy_n be_v much_o see_v in_o that_o time_n that_o though_o i_o have_v not_o much_o comfort_n meanâ—_n yet_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o keep_v up_o my_o spirit_n in_o a_o way_n of_o depend_v upon_o he_o and_o my_o fear_n be_v less_o at_o that_o time_n than_o former_o when_o i_o have_v more_o help_n so_o gracious_a be_v tâ—â—_n lord_n unto_o i_o in_o keep_v i_o alive_a in_o a_o time_n of_o famine_n after_o this_o through_o god_n goodness_n i_o be_v sometime_o under_o the_o preach_n of_o a_o powerful_a minister_n mr._n bateman_n of_o ockingam_n who_o be_v crown_v with_o the_o conversion_n providence_n strengthen_v and_o build_v up_o of_o many_o soul_n unto_o who_o preach_v the_o lord_n give_v i_o such_o a_o blessing_n as_o i_o seldom_o if_o ever_o go_v away_o from_o hear_v he_o without_o comfort_n though_o i_o come_v to_o hear_v he_o with_o many_o doubt_n upon_o my_o spirit_n yet_o the_o lord_n so_o rule_v and_o direct_v he_o as_o if_o his_o sermon_n have_v be_v only_o concern_v my_o particular_a and_o he_o full_o acquaint_v with_o the_o whole_a condition_n of_o my_o soul._n sometime_o the_o lord_n direct_v i_o to_o some_o support_a promise_n upon_o which_o i_o rely_v but_o those_o promise_n which_o be_v make_v to_o believer_n though_o i_o high_o prize_v they_o yet_o i_o dare_v not_o apply_v they_o to_o myself_o fear_v that_o i_o have_v no_o interest_n in_o they_o but_o that_o promise_n prov._n 28._o 13._o he_o that_o confess_v promise_n and_o forsake_v his_o sin_n shall_v find_v mercy_n and_o that_o 1_o joh._n 1._o 9_o if_o we_o confess_v our_o sin_n he_o be_v faithful_a and_o just_a to_o forgive_v we_o our_o sin_n and_o to_o cleanse_v we_o from_o all_o unrighteousness_n and_o the_o promise_n be_v 1_o joh._n 2._o 1_o 2._o if_o any_o man_n sin_n we_o have_v a_o advocate_n with_o the_o father_n jesus_n christ_n the_o righteous_a and_o he_o be_v the_o propitiation_n for_o our_o sin_n and_o not_o for_o we_o only_o but_o for_o the_o sin_n of_o the_o whole_a world_n and_o the_o invitation_n isa._n 55._o 1._o ho_o every_o one_o that_o thirst_v come_v you_o to_o the_o water_n and_o he_o that_o have_v no_o money_n come_v you_o buy_v and_o eat_v yea_o come_v buy_v wine_n and_o milk_n without_o money_n and_o without_o price_n together_o with_o
the_o rest_n of_o the_o chapter_n all_o those_o place_n the_o lord_n often_o make_v a_o stay_n unto_o my_o soul_n and_o afterward_o the_o lord_n so_o bless_v one_o mean_n or_o other_o unto_o i_o insomuch_o as_o i_o be_v keep_v from_o sink_v and_o fall_v into_o such_o horror_n as_o many_o of_o the_o people_n of_o god_n sometime_o fall_v into_o but_o yet_o my_o fear_n and_o doubt_n be_v so_o many_o as_o that_o my_o comfort_n never_o last_v long_o doubt_n if_o the_o lord_n do_v but_o hide_v his_o face_n i_o be_v trouble_v no_o long_o can_v i_o believe_v than_o i_o find_v new_a strength_n give_v in_o that_o the_o lord_n will_v ever_o have_v mercy_n upon_o my_o soul._n the_o sense_n of_o original_a sin_n and_o actual_a transgression_n in_o their_o filthiness_n and_o guiltiness_n cause_v my_o fear_n yet_o to_o remain_v upon_o my_o spirit_n my_o faith_n then_o seem_v very_o small_a if_o i_o have_v any_o which_o i_o much_o question_v i_o dare_v not_o then_o say_v lord_n increase_v my_o faith_n but_o i_o can_v cry_v earnest_o lord_n work_n faith_n in_o i_o i_o find_v much_o dulness_n and_o deadness_n manifold_a distraction_n in_o duty_n so_o that_o god_n may_v just_o have_v withdraw_v himself_o from_o i_o for_o ever_o yet_o notwithstanding_o all_o my_o uneven_a walk_n with_o god_n he_o be_v gracious_o please_v to_o manifest_v his_o mercy_n unto_o my_o soul._n when_o i_o be_v strike_v with_o such_o weakness_n as_o i_o apprehend_v may_v quick_o have_v end_v my_o life_n i_o fall_v into_o a_o great_a fear_n at_o the_o first_o find_v my_o heart_n to_o sink_v the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o gâ—ive_v i_o so_o much_o respite_n as_o to_o pour_v out_o my_o soul_n before_o he_o desire_v strength_n and_o support_v from_o he_o to_o keep_v up_o my_o spirit_n and_o to_o make_v i_o willing_a to_o submit_v to_o his_o dispensation_n and_o the_o lord_n gracious_o answer_v my_o prayer_n in_o that_o he_o remove_v all_o my_o former_a doubt_n answer_v and_o fear_v all_o the_o time_n of_o that_o sickness_n which_o be_v long_o and_o so_o dangerous_a that_o neither_o i_o nor_o other_o expect_v my_o life_n the_o lord_n then_o clear_v up_o my_o evidence_n for_o heaven_n and_o give_v i_o in_o so_o much_o comfort_n against_o the_o apprehension_n of_o death_n as_o i_o never_o have_v in_o all_o my_o life_n before_o other_o like_a trial_n of_o the_o lord_n love_v i_o find_v still_o when_o i_o be_v in_o the_o great_a extremity_n and_o stand_v most_o in_o need_n of_o help_n from_o he_o insomuch_o as_o at_o such_o time_n i_o have_v hope_v that_o i_o shall_v never_o again_o have_v question_v the_o love_n of_o god_n to_o my_o soul_n but_o i_o have_v find_v it_o otherwise_o by_o sad_a experience_n for_o when_o these_o impression_n be_v wear_v of_o i_o have_v be_v ready_a to_o call_v all_o in_o question_n again_o concern_v my_o poor_a soul._n it_o make_v i_o oft_o to_o think_v of_o that_o which_o be_v lay_v to_o solomon_n charge_n that_o he_o forget_v the_o lord_n that_o have_v appear_v to_o he_o twice_o believe_v i_o find_v it_o the_o hard_a thing_n to_o believe_v that_o ever_o i_o go_v about_o but_o this_o waver_a condition_n can_v not_o satisfy_v my_o soul_n for_o the_o lord_n give_v i_o sometime_o a_o glimpse_n of_o his_o love_n make_v i_o long_o after_o full_a enjoyment_n of_o it_o so_o that_o i_o be_v carry_v out_o with_o a_o restless_a impatience_n to_o beg_v that_o the_o lord_n will_v take_v away_o the_o heart_n of_o unbelief_n from_o i_o which_o do_v both_o dishonour_n he_o and_o hinder_v i_o from_o that_o peace_n which_o the_o lord_n be_v willing_a that_o his_o people_n shall_v enjoy_v my_o heart_n then_o be_v bring_v unto_o that_o frame_n i_o be_v more_o willing_a than_o ever_o i_o be_v before_o to_o impart_v my_o condition_n unto_o some_o spiritual_a friend_n friend_n who_o i_o desire_v to_o deal_v impartial_o with_o i_o acquaint_v they_o with_o the_o whole_a condition_n of_o my_o soul_n how_o far_o the_o lord_n have_v carry_v i_o on_o and_o at_o what_o i_o stick_v and_o still_o as_o new_a objection_n do_v arise_v i_o labour_v to_o get_v satisfaction_n be_v convince_v that_o i_o have_v too_o much_o prejudice_v myself_o in_o that_o i_o have_v not_o soon_o make_v my_o condition_n know_v to_o some_o who_o be_v able_a to_o give_v i_o advice_n this_o way_n of_o communicate_v my_o condition_n comfort_n i_o find_v the_o lord_n bless_v unto_o my_o soul_n insomuch_o that_o my_o hope_n be_v more_o confirm_v my_o fear_n more_o remove_v my_o faith_n more_o strengthen_v and_o by_o the_o hear_n of_o such_o sermon_n and_o read_v such_o book_n as_o come_v close_a unto_o the_o conscience_n and_o be_v most_o for_o trial_n of_o one_o spiritual_a condition_n i_o find_v the_o great_a benefit_n by_o and_o receive_v the_o most_o comfort_n from_o they_o former_o i_o have_v many_o fear_n that_o i_o be_v not_o one_o of_o they_o who_o have_v a_o interest_n in_o the_o election_n of_o grace_n but_o the_o lord_n afterward_o put_v into_o my_o heart_n to_o inquire_v whether_o i_o have_v those_o grace_n of_o his_o spirit_n wrought_v in_o i_o which_o none_o but_o his_o own_o elect_a people_n can_v have_v upon_o the_o strict_a search_v into_o my_o own_o heart_n the_o lord_n be_v please_v after_o many_o year_n of_o fear_n at_o last_o to_o evidence_n unto_o my_o soul_n that_o there_o be_v a_o change_n wrought_v in_o my_o heart_n self-examination_n will_n and_o affection_n notwithstanding_o the_o remainder_n of_o sin_n and_o corruption_n which_o still_o encompass_v i_o about_o be_v confident_a that_o he_o that_o have_v begin_v this_o good_a work_n will_v not_o leave_v it_o unfinished_a unto_o the_o day_n of_o jesus_n christ_n and_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o set_v home_o divers_a promise_n for_o the_o strengthen_n of_o my_o faith_n faith_n to_o wit_n those_o which_o set_v down_o the_o everlasting_a covenant_n 2_o sam._n 23._o 5._o the_o everlasting_a love_n of_o god_n jer._n 31._o 3._o joh._n 11._o 13._o the_o certainty_n of_o the_o foundation_n 2_o tim._n 2._o 19_o the_o certainty_n of_o the_o promise_n 2_o cor._n 1._o 20._o they_o be_v all_o in_o christ_n yea_o and_o amen_o and_o that_o the_o child_n of_o god_n have_v eternal_a life_n promise_v unto_o they_o and_o that_o none_o shall_v be_v ever_o able_a to_o pluck_v they_o out_o of_o christ_n hand_n joh._n 10._o 28._o then_o for_o divers_a year_n the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o stay_v i_o to_o lead_v and_o guide_v i_o till_o he_o have_v set_v my_o foot_n upon_o that_o rock_n which_o be_v high_o than_o i_o from_o whence_o i_o trust_v that_o i_o shall_v never_o be_v remove_v and_o now_o my_o heart_n desire_v be_v to_o ascribe_v that_o measure_n of_o hope_n and_o comfort_n which_o the_o lord_n have_v give_v i_o at_o any_o time_n only_o unto_o the_o praise_n of_o the_o glory_n of_o his_o grace_n who_o have_v make_v i_o accept_v in_o his_o belove_a thankfulness_n which_o be_v so_o great_a a_o mercy_n as_o i_o can_v never_o be_v thankful_a enough_o for_o nor_o walk_v answerable_a thereunto_o i_o know_v when_o i_o look_v into_o my_o heart_n there_o be_v matter_n of_o fear_n that_o the_o lord_n will_v withdraw_v the_o influence_n of_o his_o comfort_n from_o i_o but_o that_o which_o i_o rest_v upon_o be_v the_o free_a mercy_n of_o god_n in_o christ_n expect_v performance_n of_o his_o promise_n make_v rom._n 6._o 16._o sin_n shall_v not_o have_v dominion_n over_o you_o because_o you_o be_v not_o under_o the_o law_n but_o under_o grace_n and_o ezek._n 36._o 25._o that_o he_o will_v sprinkle_v clean_a water_n upon_o i_o and_o that_o he_o will_v give_v i_o a_o new_a heart_n and_o put_v a_o new_a spirit_n within_o i_o that_o he_o will_v take_v away_o my_o stony_a heart_n and_o give_v i_o a_o heart_n of_o flesh_n be_v persuade_v that_o the_o lord_n will_v keep_v i_o by_o his_o own_o power_n through_o faith_n unto_o salvation_n and_o now_o that_o i_o may_v have_v all_o the_o grace_n of_o the_o spirit_n strengthen_v and_o increase_v in_o i_o which_o i_o find_v that_o i_o stand_v in_o continual_a need_n of_o it_o be_v the_o desire_n of_o my_o soul_n to_o be_v a_o partaker_n of_o the_o lord_n supper_n which_o through_o the_o blood_n of_o christ_n only_o i_o have_v right_a unto_o this_o be_v the_o particular_a account_n of_o god_n gracious_a deal_n with_o this_o godly_a gentlewoman_n consider_v there_o be_v no_o administration_n of_o the_o sacrament_n in_o that_o parochial_a congregation_n where_o she_o live_v and_o use_v former_o to_o receive_v it_o nor_o any_o pastor_n at_o all_o to_o officiate_v there_o she_o be_v desirous_a to_o enjoy_v that_o great_a ordinance_n and_o that_o after_o a_o pure_a way_n of_o administration_n send_v this_o aforementioned_a narrative_n
argue_v a_o good_a man_n for_o goodness_n be_v communicative_a and_o such_o be_v his_o academical_a dexterity_n prudence_n that_o he_o can_v impart_v as_o scaliger_n speak_v the_o felicity_n of_o wit_n to_o his_o hearer_n so_o accommodate_v and_o insinuate_v the_o matter_n in_o hand_n as_o that_o his_o pupil_n may_v both_o perceive_v their_o profit_v and_o taste_v the_o sweetness_n of_o that_o wherein_o they_o profit_v thus_o by_o his_o school-stratagem_n he_o win_v the_o heart_n of_o his_o pupil_n both_o to_o himself_o and_o to_o a_o desire_n of_o learning_n they_o be_v each_o to_o other_o as_o the_o prophet_n and_o the_o son_n of_o the_o prophet_n his_o pupil_n be_v honourer_n and_o lover_n of_o he_o and_o he_o be_v a_o tutor_n a_o friend_n and_o a_o father_n unto_o they_o the_o manner_n of_o his_o conversion_n conversion_n according_a to_o his_o own_o relation_n be_v thus_o during_o his_o residence_n in_o the_o university_n god_n begin_v to_o work_v upon_o he_o by_o the_o ministry_n of_o mr._n william_n perkins_n of_o bless_a memory_n but_o the_o motion_n and_o stir_n of_o his_o heart_n which_o then_o be_v he_o suppress_v think_v that_o if_o he_o shall_v trouble_v himself_o with_o matter_n of_o religion_n according_a to_o the_o light_n he_o have_v then_o receive_v it_o will_v be_v a_o hindrance_n to_o he_o in_o his_o study_n which_o then_o he_o have_v much_o addict_v himself_o unto_o therefore_o he_o be_v willing_a to_o silence_v those_o suggestion_n and_o inward_a calling_n which_o he_o have_v from_o god_n spirit_n and_o do_v witting_o defer_v the_o prosecution_n of_o that_o work_n until_o afterward_o at_o length_n as_o he_o be_v walk_v in_o the_o field_n he_o hear_v the_o bell_n toll_v for_o mr._n perkins_n who_o lie_v a_o die_a whereupon_o he_o be_v secret_o glad_a in_o his_o heart_n that_o he_o shall_v now_o be_v rid_v of_o he_o who_o have_v as_o he_o say_v lay_v siege_n to_o and_o beleaguer_v his_o heart_n this_o become_v matter_n of_o much_o affliction_n to_o he_o afterward_o god_n keep_v it_o upon_o his_o spirit_n with_o the_o aggravation_n of_o it_o and_o make_v it_o a_o effectual_a mean_n of_o convince_a and_o humble_v he_o in_o the_o sight_n and_o sense_n of_o the_o natural_a enmity_n that_o be_v in_o man_n nature_n against_o god_n afterwards_o hear_v dr._n sib_n then_o mr._n sib_n preach_v a_o sermon_n about_o regeneration_n wherein_o he_o show_v first_o what_o regeneration_n be_v not_o and_o so_o open_v the_o state_n of_o a_o mere_a civil_a man_n mr._n cotton_n see_v his_o own_o condition_n full_o discover_v which_o through_o god_n mercy_n do_v drive_v he_o to_o a_o stand_n as_o plain_o see_v himself_o destitute_a of_o true_a grace_n all_o his_o false_a hope_n and_o ground_n now_o fail_v he_o and_o so_o he_o lie_v for_o a_o long_a time_n in_o a_o uncomfortable_a despair_a way_n and_o of_o all_o other_o thing_n this_o be_v his_o heavy_a burden_n that_o he_o have_v witting_o withstand_v the_o mean_n and_o offer_v of_o grace_n and_o mercy_n which_o he_o find_v have_v be_v tender_v to_o he_o thus_o he_o continue_v till_o it_o please_v god_n to_o let_v in_o a_o word_n of_o faith_n into_o his_o heart_n and_o to_o cause_v he_o to_o look_v unto_o christ_n for_o his_o heal_n which_o word_n also_o be_v dispense_v unto_o he_o by_o the_o same_o doctor_n sib_n which_o beget_v in_o he_o a_o singular_a and_o constant_a love_n to_o the_o say_a doctor_n of_o who_o he_o be_v also_o answerable_o belove_v that_o which_o first_o make_v he_o famous_a in_o cambridge_n be_v his_o funeral_n oration_n for_o doctor_n some_o oratory_n master_n of_o peter_n house_n which_o be_v so_o accurate_o perform_v in_o respect_n of_o invention_n elegancy_n purity_n of_o style_n ornament_n of_o rhetoric_n elocution_n and_o oratorious_a beauty_n of_o the_o whole_a as_o that_o he_o be_v thenceforth_o look_v at_o as_o another_o xenophon_n or_o musa_fw-la attica_n throughout_o the_o university_n some_o space_n of_o time_n intervening_a he_o be_v call_v to_o preach_v at_o st._n mary_n where_o he_o preach_v a_o university_n sermon_n with_o high_a applause_n from_o the_o academical_a wit_n insomuch_o as_o the_o fame_n of_o his_o learning_n grow_v great_a and_o great_a and_o afterward_o be_v again_o call_v to_o preach_v in_o the_o same_o place_n as_o one_o oration_n of_o pericles_n leave_v his_o hearer_n with_o a_o appetite_n after_o another_o so_o the_o memory_n of_o his_o former_a accurate_a exercise_n fill_v the_o college_n especial_o the_o young_a student_n with_o a_o fresh_a expectation_n of_o such_o elegancy_n of_o learning_n as_o make_v they_o flock_n to_o the_o sermon_n with_o a_o athenian_a itch_n after_o some_o new_a thing_n as_o to_o the_o ornament_n of_o rhetoric_n and_o abstruser_n notion_n of_o philosophy_n but_o his_o spirit_n now_o savour_v of_o the_o cross_n of_o christ_n more_o than_o of_o humane_a literature_n and_o be_v teach_v of_o god_n to_o distinguish_v between_o the_o word_n of_o wisdom_n and_o the_o wisdom_n of_o word_n his_o speech_n and_o preach_v be_v not_o now_o with_o the_o entice_a word_n of_o man_n wisdom_n but_o in_o the_o demonstration_n of_o the_o spirit_n and_o of_o power_n the_o disappoint_v expectation_n of_o the_o auditory_a soon_o appear_v in_o their_o countenance_n and_o the_o discouragement_n of_o their_o non-acceptance_n return_v he_o unto_o his_o chamber_n not_o without_o some_o sad_a thought_n of_o heart_n where_o yet_o he_o have_v not_o be_v long_o but_o lo_o dr._n preston_n then_o mr._n preston_n knock_v at_o his_o chamber_n door_n preston_n and_o come_v in_o acquaint_v he_o with_o his_o spiritual_a condition_n and_o tell_v he_o how_o it_o have_v please_v god_n to_o work_v effectual_o upon_o his_o heart_n by_o that_o sermon_n after_o which_o dr._n preston_n ever_o high_o prize_v he_o and_o both_o full_o and_o strong_o close_v with_o he_o which_o real_a seal_n of_o god_n unto_o his_o ministry_n much_o comfort_v his_o soul_n far_o above_o what_o the_o present_a less_o 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1656._o if_o we_o inquire_v into_o the_o relation_n of_o this_o gentlewoman_n parentage_n either_o by_o affinity_n or_o consanguinity_n or_o both_o side_n the_o family_n be_v ancient_a of_o renown_n and_o good_a reputation_n concern_v the_o family_n from_o whence_o she_o be_v descend_v her_o father_n be_v sir_n nathaniel_n brent_n late_a warden_n of_o merton_n college_n a_o learned_a knight_n who_o great_a pain_n and_o dangerous_a adventure_n to_o procure_v the_o history_n of_o the_o council_n of_o trent_n which_o he_o translate_v into_o english_a be_v to_o be_v remember_v with_o a_o honourable_a mention_n and_o for_o his_o faithful_a discovery_n of_o jesuitical_a juggle_n his_o name_n will_v be_v have_v in_o honour_n when_o the_o name_n of_o the_o popish_a party_n will_v rot_v her_o mother_n the_o lady_n martha_n brent_n be_v a_o lady_n of_o a_o gracious_a spirit_n abound_v in_o love_n meekness_n humility_n love_v to_o god_n ordinance_n and_o god_n child_n her_o delight_n with_o david_n be_v in_o the_o society_n of_o saint_n she_o imitate_v her_o worthy_a father_n in_o the_o sweetness_n of_o disposition_n who_o be_v dr._n robert_n abbot_n that_o learned_a and_o godly_a bishop_n of_o sarum_n who_o be_v malleus_fw-la baptismi_fw-la &_o armianismi_n the_o hammer_n of_o popery_n and_o arminianism_n his_o excellent_a work_n or_o monument_n of_o his_o honourable_a memory_n to_o be_v bear_v of_o a_o godly_a family_n and_o to_o be_v well_o descend_v be_v a_o mercy_n not_o to_o be_v neglect_v mr._n philpot_n a_o zealous_a martyr_n be_v a_o king_n son_n and_o a_o archdeacon_n tell_v his_o adversary_n that_o he_o be_v a_o gentleman_n anabaptistical_a parity_n and_o level_v design_n be_v worthy_o to_o be_v abhor_v and_o look_v upon_o as_o a_o ready_a way_n to_o confusion_n rapine_n and_o violence_n so_o then_o we_o see_v that_o she_o be_v a_o gentlewoman_n every_o way_n well_o descend_v her_o ancestor_n be_v person_n of_o honour_n and_o from_o they_o she_o have_v the_o benefit_n of_o a_o ingenuous_a and_o liberal_a education_n this_o be_v much_o but_o it_o be_v more_o when_o i_o say_v that_o she_o come_v of_o a_o godly_a stock_n and_o of_o pray_v relation_n and_o indeed_o this_o be_v that_o which_o ennoble_v nobility_n itself_o god_n in_o mercy_n begin_v with_o this_o gentlewoman_n betimes_o conversion_n even_o about_o the_o fourteen_o year_n of_o her_o age_n then_o god_n give_v she_o a_o willing_a mind_n and_o purpose_n of_o heart_n to_o serve_v he_o in_o the_o day_n of_o her_o youth_n insomuch_o as_o she_o be_v swift_a to_o hear_v the_o word_n of_o god_n she_o wait_v diligent_o at_o the_o post_n of_o wisdom_n gate_n she_o write_v the_o sermon_n which_o she_o hear_v a_o practice_n use_v by_o king_n edward_n the_o six_o that_o rare_a english_a josiah_n and_o she_o leave_v many_o volume_n of_o sermon_n of_o her_o own_o hand-writing_n take_v with_o great_a dexterity_n and_o these_o be_v as_o so_o many_o choice_n monument_n of_o her_o industry_n she_o be_v much_o conversant_a in_o read_v of_o the_o holy_a scripture_n which_o can_v make_v we_o wise_a unto_o salvation_n and_o she_o join_v with_o her_o read_n prayer_n piety_n and_o meditation_n her_o delight_n be_v in_o the_o word_n of_o god_n it_o be_v as_o with_o jeremy_n the_o joy_n and_o rejoice_v of_o her_o soul_n and_o with_o the_o read_n of_o scripture_n she_o search_v expositor_n and_o practical_a divine_n and_o attain_v thereby_o to_o such_o a_o measure_n of_o divine_a knowledge_n as_o enable_v she_o to_o state_n some_o question_n of_o controversy_n for_o her_o better_a use_n and_o help_v of_o her_o memory_n and_o to_o discourse_v very_o sound_o upon_o the_o most_o material_a point_n of_o religion_n and_o even_o above_o her_o age_n and_o sex_n to_o maintain_v the_o truth_n as_o occasion_n