if my poor Spark added any thing to your flame but especially I am pleased with what you write in the Commendation of our loving Saviour I would be grieved when any Blaspheme that worthy Name but methinks it sounds something like Heaven when any are celebrating the Praises of the Lamb indeed I have both seen and heard that of him lately that would not have left me so Tongue ty'd in this Matter as I am was not my Heart so bad as it is O the Love of Christ methinks it should be the burthèn of all our Songs methinks I would fain be saying something I know not how to cull out a more excellent Heart affecting Subject to write to you on but I am afraid to meddle almost because my low and ill Management will be but a disparagement of his matchless Love O that I knew but what to think or write that might affect my own Heart and Your's But what a strange Heart have I to deal with What can affect me if this do not O thou Stone or harder if harder can be May your Heart be more affected in reading then mine is in writing and when it is so O then remember poor me O how should our Hearts be affected when we consider the Person loving the Manner how he hath loved us the rich Benefits his Love hath put him upon procuring for us or we our selves the Persons beloved That he the only begotten Son of God who was his Father's delight from all Eternity ever rejoycing in his Presence that he should have such a gracious Respect to us such poor sorry contemptible vile and sinful Wretches as we are that he should Love us and that at such a rate as he hath done even to die for us and this when he knew before hand how disingeniously we should carry it towards him even returning him Hatred for his Love O this is the most prodigious stupendious Act of condesending Love imaginable And then O think his Love is eternal Love though he was not actually our Saviour from Eternity yet he was so appointed in God's eternal Purpose and Decree O that the ever blessed God should have such eternal projects of Love for such worms as we And his Love is to Eternity for whom he thus loves once he loves to the end and should not this stir our Hearts if we have any Life in us to think that the Son of God should have such a special Eye upon us in his Death procuring the effectual Application of that Redemption he was then working out to our Souls in whom there was nothing antecedently to move him to such distinguishing Love O what shall we think of those invaluable Benefits he hath procured for us as reconciliation justification sanctification and eternal Glory O that I could get my Heart more affected with this astonishing Love Lord I cannot comprehend I cannot reach it no wonder it passeth Knowledge its Love in a Mystery but I do and will admire it and look and long for a sight of thee in Heaven where I shall know thee better with all the Heart affecting Circumstances of thy Love being ever under the warm and melting Influences thereof Hath Christ so loved us what follows but that we hate Sin more and love the World less but Him more and express our love in obedience to the things he commands us and in a willingness and readiness to deny our Selves in any thing dear to us for his Sake well I hope you will pick something out of these confused hints But my Paper begin to tell me I forget my self I am Your's I. B. LETTER VI. To S. E. October 31. 1684. Dear S. YOUR'S I receiv'd and to your request that we may hence forward live a Life of Thankfulness unto and in the joyful Praises of God and our dear Redeemer I heartily desire to say Amen I looked upon it as a great Mercy that the Lord was pleased to give us to see the Faces one of another once more with Comfort but a greater still that he was pleased to indulge us with another opportunity of joyning in that precious Ordinance of sitting down together once more at his Table O what cause we have to love exalt and bless the Name of our dear Redeemer who hath I hope brought us into a special spiritual relation to himself and one to another O how should we love him our Head and one another as fellow members of his body I thought I had loved you as well as I could before but now methinks I feel a fresh and stronger Obligation then that which is purely Natural shall we be fed and feasted together by our dear Lord and shall we be hereafter glorisied together by and with him and shall we not dearly love him and one another Alass but am I one of those blessed and happy Souls am I What do I more then others more then a meer painted Hypocrite may do What have I to prove my interest in Christ my title to his precious Benefits Alass my Evidences are most to seek when I think what a difference there is between Heaven and Hell and so between their Inhabitants O what fears arise in my Soul Ah Sister these eternal Concerns of ours are not things to be left at such uncertainty by us who are so near them we must not be satissfied with a may be O let us go upon sure grounds for Eternity Yet I find which doth sometimes a little revive my Heart the Lord hath said he taketh pleasure in them that hope in his Mercy and I do hope so far as I know my Heart that I have indeed chosen him in Christ for my Portion and Felicity and that I do in the main sincerely desire and endeavour to live to him as my ultimate End But much ado I have to make this out many times Methinks I can plainly see a pious Principle acting you O that I was but as sure of my own Sincerity as I am well satisfied concerning Your's See if you can pray a little more peace into my sinful and sometimes sad and now I fear declining Soul see what you can do your Father and I would say my Father hears of you daily by me whom am Yours I. B. LETTER VII To S. E. November 18. 1684. Dear S. I Receiv'd an account of your Illness last Saturday by a Letter from my F. and to let you see I am not unmindful of you I here visit you with a few Lines though I cannot at present in Person and O that the Lord who many times makes use of poor unlikely means yet that when he pleaseth can do his Work without them would hereby encrease your Spiritual liveliness I remember I receiv'd a Letter from you not long since wherein you complain much of a dead and dull Frame which I did not answer Will a word or two now be acceptable Methought when I read your Letter it should have been my own only for this difference that you seem to
that we know we have it let the most of your time and care and thoughts be spent in the getting and exercising of Grace and wait upon God for comfort in his Time and Way and when you want Evidences of special Grace then as Mr. B. adviseth improve the general Grounds of Comfort as the merciful Nature of God the merciful Nature and Office and the all-sufficiency of a Redeemer the extent of the Covenant of Grace and so the possibility probability yea the conditional Certainty of your Salvation if you come up to covenant Terms abundance of Comfort might be fetched in by the serious Consideration of these things and if you find that trying your self by Marks be ineffectual as to helping you to Comfort but that you are rather more disordered by it your doubts encreasing would you spend your time in endeavouring to exercise Grace in putting forth fresh acts of Faith on Christ and in exercising Love to God and the like would you I say but take this Course a while I am perswaded you would find it a more ready way to Satisfaction and Comfort then by trying your self by Marks unseasonably Thus you might come to feel that you do believe and feel that you love God c. when you complain of the weakness of Grace and strength of Corruption and the like consider you are to distinguish between that which is matter of Humiliation and for Reformation and that which is matter of Doubting the Lord when he hath prepared you for it cause his face to shine upon you and order it so that the present shakings you are under may tend to and issue in your more firm Settlement I am affectionately your's I. B. LETTER XIX To my M. Dear M. I Cannot but really sympathize with you under your present Troubles methinks I feel part of the burthen that lieth upon you O that I could do any thing to make it more easy and light to you But alass I can do little more then pray for you well as your Troubles abound so may your Graces and Comforts abound much more May your Soul prosper indeed May all your outward Troubles prove spiritually Advantagious If so I both may and will rejoyce in your Happiness I take it for a certain Truth that it goeth well or ill with us as Matters go with our Souls alass what are those Mercies worth that do not someway reach our Souls And why should we not prize those Afflictions that further their Salvation and love that God the better that sends them Sure I am these sick Souls of our's need Physick as well as Food and why should we not bless God for the one as well as for the other when both tend to promote our spiritual Health O that we were brought to kiss the Rod patiently chearfully and thankfully to submit to the Lord 's severest Discipline who intends us good and not hurt and will issue all things well Dear M. chear up as well as you can labour to get above this lower Region O what solid Comforts may be fetched from Heaven in our darkest Hours here O how great how sure how near is our reward there Eye hath not seen nor Ear heard nor hath it entered into the Heart of Man to conceive what God hath laid up for them that love him and all this we none of us know how much as sure as the decree and promise of the Faithful and unchangeable God can make it and near too The Lord is at hand he saith behold I come quickly and my reward is with me dear M. Comfort your self with these Words be very careful of your self least grief be added to our Affliction My dear F. though I have not time to write is much in my Thoughts his illness hath damped my Spirit in that Business you know of many Friends are inquisitive about him and I hope many Prayers are going up to Heaven for him here I am your loving obedient Servant I. B. LETTER XX. To S. E. Dear S. HAVING a little time I resolved to write a line or two hoping they would not be unwelcome I have little business except Soul concerns to write about but indeed that is our greatest Business these our grand Concerns and all other things even those we call Matters of Weight great Concerns they are but trifles compared with these it is a great Comfort to me when I think what comfortable Evidences I hope I have of the good Estate of your Soul I think my self happy in having so many Relations related to Jesus Christ O happy Family highly favoured of the Lord that is likely to turn out so many Souls for Heaven O S. make sure to be one and pray hard for me that I may be another yea that there may not be one outcast amongst us and labour to get as long an Heaven as ever you can O we may begin Heaven even here O how much more of Heaven might me enjoy then we do Well I will tell you what I would be pressing after even to maintain a constant strict and holy Communion with God in and through Christ O the sweetness of Communion with God Oh our unspeakable loss in having Hearts so alienated from God and in being such strangers to a heavenly Life Lord how long shall it be thus How long e're we may love and enjoy thee perfectly without the least intermission interruption or cessation O this body of Sin And O this body of Flesh Well it is our happiness to desire and long and wait with Patience for that which others happy they are do possess and enjoy with fullest satisfaction may our Souls now be following harder after God May we now live like believers a life of holy Love and joyful praises I am much concerned for poor F. but can do little to help him only I pray as hard for him as I can be as careful as you can poor M. that she be not brought down to I am affectionately Your's I. B. LETTER XXI To my F. Dear F. NOW I am beginning to write comes to mind God's great goodness in that I have yet a F. to write to I have great cause to sing aloud of Mercy the Lord punisheth less then my iniquity deserveth he doth but shake the Rod to let me see what I deserve and he can do at pleasure that I ly every way at Mercy when he might strike home indeed O that my Heart should be no more affected with so great Mercy O how far the Lord will fall short of that tribute of Praise due from me O that he would help me yea O that all my Friends would help me by their Prayers that I may love and praise God more who is continually every way doing me good O what a pitty what a shame so good a God should be loved saved and praised no more Was not Earth what it is was not my Heart what it is is was impossible but I live in hopes it will be better e're long
penal Evils which God inflicts upon us Righteousness and Judgment is ever to be ascribed to our God and all the blame to be charged home upon our own naughty Hearts it is Sin which imbitters all our Comforts here O hate Sin and take a holy revenge upon it Afflictions are but the effect Sin is the cause now remove the Cause and the Effects will cease O what bruitish and unreasonable Creatures are we who are so much in love with Sin a thing so odious and hateful in the sight of God and so mischievous to our Selves O unnatural we who are so in love with our own Miseries Now that you may follow this Direction effectually it would be a good way seriously to endeavour to find out what those Sins are that have had the greatest hand in bringing this Affliction upon you for in many of God's strokes his Hand his Rod points very visibly to the Offence I have verily thought so in several of the light Afflictions he hath laid upon me When God afflicts us in Relations we ought with shame and grief to reflect upon our relative Sins I dare not but humbly mind you of this thing having found out the Achans let us dispatch them without delay let us humble our Souls exceedingly for them and earnestly beg the Pardon of them and with all our might strive against them O let us shew Sin no mercy Let the Lord see that his quarrelling with us hath broached an irreconcilable quarrel between our Souls and Sin 2dly Let us be led to see more of the emptiness and vanity of the Creature since our fall from God to the Creature we are very prone to place and seek our Happiness in it whereas our Happiness consists and ought to be placed in God alone who is the chief Good and our Gracious God many times sees good to Afflict his Children most in those things which have got the greatest share of their Affections and so are likely to draw away most of their Hearts from him O remember dear Cozen our Head and Husband the Lord Jesus hath a very jealous Eye over our deceitful Hearts he cannot brook any adultrous Affections in his Spouse when he seeth we are following strangers and so growing strange with him it much offends him yet so constant is his Love to us that he takes various Methods to recover our Affections and if nothing else will do it rather then quite loose us he will hedge up our way with Thorns and seldom that our naughty Hearts will be reclaimed till it comes to that I remember an Expression of my Father in a Sermon of his to this Purpose I am verily perswaded saith he that most of the lashes laid upon God's Children here are to pay home and sharply to correct them for some overloving of the Creature As I said before hate Sin more so here love the World less 3dly When ever we find the Devil tempting us to hard Thoughts of God then let us stand up and plead mightily for God's goodness let not our base distrustful unbelieving Hearts be suffered to entertain any such vile Suggestions when God's providences are dark and afflictive towards his People then it is the Devils trick to do what he can to possess their Minds with black and unworthy Conceptions of him as if he had an evil Eye upon them and grudged them their outward Comforts or did willingly Afflict them or took pleasure in their Grief so it is sometimes with God's Church in general Sion's Language sometimes is The Lord hath forsaken my God hath forgotten me And so it is frequently with particular Souls under their particular Tryals and Troubles here How have poor I experienced this sad Truth And with what shame and sorrow may I acknowledge the too great readiness of my base Heart to close with such Temptations And if you do not meet with the same sometimes I can assure you from sad Experience your Case is singularly Happy and if you do meet with them with abhorrence reject and cast them out fear yet scorn to entertain them labour to recollect former Experiences you have had of the Lord's loving kindness He is unchangable in his Love to his Think often what an Expression it is of his Love and Care that he will be at the pains to Afflict you clearing your Adoption you may thence easily argue that all your Afflictions are but Fatherly Chastizements And O how would that sweet Promise of God's turning all to our spiritual Good and Advantage Rom. 8.28 if frequently seriously and believingly considered of make us think very well of all he doth 4thly Live by Faith upon the Attributes and Promises of God it is nothing below this that will be able to keep up your Heart and hold up your Head above these Waters and here I would advise you to seek out those Attributes of God that most suit your Case as it may be sometimes you are puzzeled even at your Wit 's end and know not what to do not what Course to take I believe it is so with you sometimes is it not Your way is made dark in this Wilderness why then have recourse by Faith to the infinite Wisdom of God it may be you meet with a great deal of treachery and deceitfulness in the Creature in this Case live upon the Truth and Faithfulness of God which never fails It may be you may meet with cruel and harsh Usage from such as you have no reason to expect most of the Contrary in this Case solace your Soul in the Consideration of those Bowels of Compassions that are in your heavenly Father and so improve all the Attributes of God for they are all yours and strongly engaged for you if you be his and so as to the Promises of God seek out those that come nearest to your Case promises of Support under your Affliction and of Deliverance when the Lord shall see that good for you at least of a blessed Sanctification of all to your Soul which is ten Thousand times better then present deliverance without it 5thly The exercise of Patience is another thing wherein a Christian Carriage under Affliction doth consist a quiet submitting unto and acquiessing in the good Will of God consider God's disposing Will in his Providence is as really his Will and doth as firmly constitute our Duty to Obey as his commanding Will in his Word And seeing it is his Will that it should be so with you as now it is endeavour chearfully to subscribe unto it let it appear that you are a Practitioner yea a good Proficient in the holy Apostles Art who had learnt in whatsoever State he was therewith to be Content what a poor Contentment is ours if it depends upon our Creature enjoyments yet what abundant reason we should be Content with what we have we deserve nothing so surely ought to be Content with any thing and if an ever Blessed God will not Content us surely we are very unreasonable and
be more seriously affected with your Case then I am with mine who have more cause O if ever poor Creature had need to make such complaints it s I Well but do we not hear Persons most eminently Pious making such complaints very frequently We should not be quite discouraged as though our case was singular How often doth warm hearted David pray for quickning which argues a sense of his want Sensible we should be but not discouraged O that we could confess and bewail our deadness more sensibly more lively But all our work lieth not in complaining but we must use the means God hath appointed for our quickning I verily believe our greatest work lieth in prevailing with our own Hearts to the diligent constant and believing use of the means certainly quickning enlivening Grace is purchased for us by the Lord Jesus and now he hath gone through the most painful part of his Work is he not willing to apply to our Souls what he hath purchased O let us not once question this O let us not wrong a dear Redeemer so much as to think otherwise of him O methinks was I but once made a meet recipient of these influences of his Spirit I should not doubt but I should have them Well it is Grace that must make us so and we have a gracious God to deal with who delights in Communicating of his grace and goodness to his Creatures let us call to mind what we heard of this Subject when we was last together let us ply our Hearts with the serious Consideration of the Sin and Evil of such a Frame together with the necessity reasonableness excellency and usefulness of the Contrary let us pray hard for it and use other means But pray S. take heed of that ungrateful Partiality as to judge and conclude from the remainders of Sin in you that you are in a state of Sin and Death the best on Earth complain of deadness and they do not Complement but have real Cause for it a perfect freedom from all Sin and its Effects remember that is reserved for Heaven Have you not a principle of Spiritual life Else whence comes the Sense you have of your deadness Methinks if I was with you and you would be faithful to your self I should not doubt but I could convince you think as ill of Sin as you will as you can but acknowledge and honour Grace joyfully and thankfully entertain any quickning Motions you have as you would have more what I say to you I would speak home to my own Soul the Lord help me that I may The Lord who is all perfect Spirit and Life make us more like unto himself I am your truly Affectionate Loving Brother I. B. LETTER VIII To S. E. December 15. 1684. Dear S. I Receiv'd both your's and owe you more then thanks for them I would bless the Lord that hath directed us to this way of Correspondence by Writing and that about the great Concernments of our Souls which I hope may prove profitable to each of us and very comfortable in the review I am sorry to hear of the bodily grievances you are under but stormy and pationate at the providential Dispensations of our wise and good God I dare not I would not be certainly if there be any true rest and satisfaction for the Creature it is in the will of its Creator who is goodness it self and I am glad to hear of the calmness of your Spirit my daily Prayers to God are for your spiritual and eternal Welfare and that you may not want any good thing here that the Lord would rebuke Distempers and lengthen out your Life but in that you are mindful of Death I rejoyce for to tell you true I love in my Heart to read and hear and think of Death my self indeed I have now out-lived my self my own expectation some Years But O the unaccountable folly that I am guilty of in that I am yet no more fit to die O strange almost incredible I Profess to believe a Future Judgment that there is a day wherein the great God by Jesus Christ will Judge me with all the World for all my Thoughts and Words and Actions whether they have been good or bad and so sentence me to my final State But O how unaffecting are my Apprehensions of this certain great and dreadful Truth and how inconsistent is my Practice to the belief hereof I am daily running on in my Errors heaping one Sin upon the back of another so laying my self under an unavoidable necessity either of bitter Repentance here or else exposing my self to the condemning Sentence of a most just and righteous Judge hereafter to a State of inconceivable and endless Misery which is enough to make any Heart except such a Flint as mine to tremble if seriously thought of Well shall I go on in this careless Frame and Course I fear I fear I shall but God forbid Well there are two things I would commend to my self and you in order to our Preparation for Death and Judgment 1st Let us make sure of a true and thorough work of Sanctification upon our Hearts O how shall we dare to look Death in the Face if found in an unsanctified Estate Sin is the sting of Death but then how may we with undanted Courage look it in the Face and as it were play with it when the Sting is taken out when we are passed from Death to Life if Sin be dead to be sure it s pardoned so otherwise how shall we think of Judgment to which Death immediately carries our Souls Will God clear the Guilty The turning point at that Day will be whether we be such as have come up to the Terms required of us in the remedying Law of Grace all are Sinners that is certain but all are not impenitent unbelieving Sinners O Sister penitent believing holy Souls and they alone shall be able to stand in Judgment shall obtain Mercy from the Lord in that Day and none but such have real ground of Comfort in the forethoughts of it 2dly Let us labour after clear and certain Evidences of our sincerity O how sweet a thing is Assurance of God's Love peace of Conscience and joy in the Holy Ghost How would these chear and revive our Souls in a dying Hour Sure I am a well grounded Assurance would then pay us our own with Interest though we should be at never so much pains to attain it but how sad to be sent to bed in the Dark it must needs be very uncomfortable to a gracious Soul to leave this World uncertain how it shall go with it in the next therefore let us study the Word more which is the Rule by which we must be judged and impartially compare our Hearts and Lives therewith by which means through God's help we may come to know how it will go with us then Blessed be God for that Revelation of his Will Well that our mortality and immortality may
Man and it is very Afflictive to all that love you as for my own part it clouds and dasheth all my outward Comfort when ever I think of you and the Lord knows that is not seldom and my poor F. is declining fast and your cheariness I am well satisfied would be better to him then any Physick Well dear M. I am daily pleading with G. for you as I have now been pleading with you I shall now wait for my Answer from you both may it be a comfortable one May it I then promise to bless G. for it more then I ever did for any outward Mercy he ever gave me in all my Life I am concerned for my poor S. that she hath learnt to bear her Trials no better alass we must learn to stoop and hold our Tongues the Lord will have us at that before he brings us to Heaven I intend to let her hear from me shortly but my Affection engaged me to deal with you first O that it may not be in vain I would fain take fast hold on you both and engage him to drive the nail home carry it like a Christian an that hath already a Christ in possession and an Heaven in hope the God of all grace and comfort revive and chear you dear M. what I have written comes from the tender Affection of your loving obedient S. I. B. LETTER XXVII To my M. Dear M. I Was much concerned to see you so low when you was here in Town I earnestly beg the Lord would make your burthen lighter and in the mean time encrease your Strength to bear it and it would much rejoyce my Heart could I do any thing to help you either of these Ways your Exercises are many and great and you are one of a sorrowful Spirit whereby all your other burthens fasten themselves the more and deeper upon you I can say something to your Case from my own Experience being many times much troubled with the same Distemper I will therefore tell you how I find it with my self and what course I have found most helpful to me I have my exercises many ways both inward and outward and such as are no small ones and when a melancholy Fit takes me I am many times ready quite to sink under them and can do little else but aggravate my Troubles and make every little thing great and inwardly lash and torment my self not only with what I at present feel but also with future fears being ready to conclude it will never be better but worse and worse with me a thousand sad perplexing Thoughts crowd into my Mind and I please my self in this tormenting of my self though when the fit is over I cannot but condemn my self for it yet while under it I really think I cannot do otherwise nay that I do well in it and then sometimes I can neither read nor hear any thing but I must meditate Terrour from it and make nothing of bearing false witness against my self every thing must go against me be it right or wrong at other times the best Friends I have can scarce say or do any thing to please me but I can find something to disquiet both my self and them sometimes I have gone alone to think it out but I find there is no end of that but now I will tell you of two things wherein I have found the most Relief the one is secret Prayer when I find one of these Fits is creeping on me when I find my self pinched or burthened one way or other I then take the first opportunity I can possibly get to go alone and there to give my Heart free vent endeavouring to turn my Trouble into a right Channel confessing and bewailing my Sins and while I am thus endeavouring to lay this load on my other burthens are removed before I am aware and moreover it s ten to one the Lord removes that burthen too before I have done believe me I have sometimes gone to that Duty with as heavy an Heart as I think any poor Creature ever had and have come away with it as light as though I had been in a corner of Heaven I do not say this as though I thought you a stranger to this sweet remedy but to put you in mind to take it seasonably do not defer it to your wonted times of Prayer but take the very first opportunity that you can sometimes when I have thus deferred my Heart hath been so strangely bound up that I could scarce pray at all be sure to observe this to take the remedy in time before the Distemper hath got too much hold I believe this which follows is a very needful piece of Advice to you because I know you have used much to neglect your self and I am afraid you do so still whereby you injure your self both Soul and Body more then you are aware in this case use those Creature comforts and supports the Lord affords you not only as a thing Lawful but as your Duty You assuredly Sin if you do not I dare say it is the Lord's mind that you should not deny your self any thing that might make you more chearful in his Service and he hath so provided in his Providence that you need not want any thing that tends to the support or comfort of your Life and then how dare you deny your self Dear M. I write not these things at random for I know much of your Case by my own and having tried these things I recommend them to you now let my Councel be acceptable to you and that the Lord would make it effectual my earnest Prayers shall follow these poor Lines and if I might understand they are of Advantage to you it would very much rejoyce my Heart even mine who am Your's I. B. LEETTER XXVIII To C. W. upon the Death of his Child Sept. 13. 1693. My dear F. I Now understand our gracious G. hath been pleased to remove your Babe to take away that part of the delight of your Eye with a stroke I would endeavour to bear a part with you and I think my self obliged by that bond you know of though as I may say yet unscaled to attempt to administer some relief to you under your present Presures as the Lord shall enable me for some reasons I do it this way and the Lord give my Pen good speed Methinks I hear you thus bespeaking me have pity upon me have pity upon me O my Friend for the hand of God hath touched me Well I would direct your Thoughts to that Scripture 2 Sam. 12.19 20 21 22 23. and the Lord help you to take out the Copy that is there set before you an intire humble and chearful Submission and self Resignation to the good Pleasure of God is certainly our Duty even when we are under his sadest Dispensations this he stands upon and there is the greatest Reason in the world he should and now my Friend to further you herein I would have you let
c. Prov. 9.8 Reprove not a scorner least he hate thee though we must use this with Caution and not falsly call and account others so and then think our selves excused from our Duty 3. The general Rules are as follow 1. In the business of Reproof we must not only have regard to the Matter and Manner of it but we must likewise take notice what are our principle Motives and Ends and see that they be right in general it is the Glory of God the Good of others with our selves that we should aim at a desire of promoting which should set us on work influence and guide us in the whole of it should we reprove others from a proud envious unquiet or malicious Spirit merely with an intent to provoke disgrace them or the like this were to say the Commandment backward which would be sad work we must be very dilligent watchful and careful to get rid of or avoid as much as possibly we can those things in our selves which we reprove in others want of due Care here we shall find exceedingly to damp our Spirits and to be a very great obstruction to the discharge of our Duty so it will also cause us and our Reproofs to be less regarded if not dispised by others they will not have that authority in them but they will be ready in Heart at least if not in words to retort that upon us Physician Practice will be found another thing hereafter then many I fear now take it for but yet also heal thy self Or that Math. 7.3 4 5. We must not forget our selves so as to leave Prayer out or rather so as to leave God out of the business for want of engaging him by Prayer it is by Prayer that this word of Reproof must be sanctified When ever we are called to this Duty we had need lift up a Prayer to God that he would put suitable Affections into our Hearts right Words which are forcible into our mouths and that he would send the Arrow home to the Mark and direct it to the White and that he would so influence and wind about the Heart of the Party reproved that our Reproof may not fail of attaining our forementioned desired end 4. If we would be profitable and successful Reprover's our selves we must then learn in like manner to receive a Reproof from others but this brings us to the Second Part of the Case or Question namely 2. How we are to manage a Reproof when it is given us by others QUESTION IV. What must the People of God do when he is testifying against them AS the Carriage of God's People towards him so his Dispensations towards them are very various sometimes he smiles and lifts them up sometimes he frowns and casts them down a right and ready compliance with God in all his providential Dispensations towards us is our plain and indiscensible Duty and that wherein much of the Excellency of a Christian lieth Now in answer to this seasonable Question which I take as chiefly aiming at the Publick God's testifying against us in his Judgments there though withal it with the answers to it may be also applied unto a private Case take my poor Thoughts in the following Particulars 1. We must see and take notice of God's Hand when it is either lifted up in his threatnings or laid on in his Judgments the great God expects as well he may to be heedfully noticed and observed by all but more especially by his own People as in what he saith so also in what he doth as in his Mercies so in his Judgments by the contrary we greatly affront and provoke him as thereby we put a great and unworthy Slight upon him This the Lord takes very ill and by it we are like to bring more and greater Judgments upon our selves Isa 26.11 Lord when thy hand is lifted up they will not see but they shall see if we will not see his Hand we are like to feel more of it till we cannot but see and take notice of it Psal 28.5 Because they regard not the work of the Lord nor the operation of his hands he shall destroy them and not build them up This is One Part of our Duty 2. An holy awful fear and dread of our incensed God and of his Judgments the Name of the Lord is a glorious and fearful Name Deut. 28.58 and as his Attributes so his Works also are part of his Name and therefore grounds for our fear and particularly his Works of Judgment And so we read that Moses was afraid when God's displeasure was hot against the Children of Israel Deut. 9.19 And so 2 Sam. 6.19 When Uzziah was smitten it is said that David was afraid of the Lord that day and elsewhere it s he that saith Psal 119 v. 120. My flesh trembleth for fear of thee I am afraid of thy judgments It is the duty of all Men to fear him who doth but look upon the Earth and it trembleth who can and shortly will with one angry Frown make all the stout hearted Sinners in the World fear him and tremble before him but especially he expects it from his own People who are better acquainted with him and know better then others do what the Smiles and Frowns of a God mean and that especially when he is meeting them in those ways of his in which he is terrible unto the Children of Men. 3. We must justify God in his severest Dispensations towards us The Lord is righteous in all his Ways and holy in all his Works there are great depths sometimes but never any the least irregularities or excesses in any of his Judgments righteousness is the Habitation of his Throne even when Clouds and Darkness are round about him as it is the Duty so it hath been the Practice of God's People when his hand hath lain heaviest on them yet to ascribe Righteousness to him and it becomes us to look on them and do likewise to say as Ez. 9.15 O Lord God of Israel thou art righteous Neh. 9 33. Howbeit thou art just in all that is brought upon us for thou hast done right Dan. 9.14 The Lord our God is righteous in all his works that he doth Or as the Prophet Jeremiah in the Name of the Church Lam. 3.22 It is of the Lord's mercies that we are not consumed because his Compassions fail not 4. We must dilligently search and try our Hearts and Ways we are not now speaking of a matter that is forreign to us alass it is our own Case the Lord hath certainly a Controversy with us if ever he had one with any People on this side utter Ruine and his Controversy hath seemed to be very much if not mostly with his own People Now methinks we should each of us be saying Lord is it I Without doubt it is Sin that hath broached this quarrel between God and us and there is none of us without that Achan in our Tents our business is to
Temptation and find a Proneness in our Hearts when we are as it were on the Top of the Hill to overlook despise contemn our poor Brethren that are below us in the Valley Job saith He that is ready to slip with his feet is as a lamp despised of him that is at ease if so we must take heed of that Again Beware of unmercifulness towards them have we a care they do not want our Bowels but especially that we do not hurt their's take we heed that when we are at ease our selves we be not among them who are not greived for the Affliction of others but especially that we add not to their Affliction O beware we of any thing that looks like injury or oppression and as we must thus labour to discover and carefully to avoid those Sins and Temptations which respect to others So 2. Those which do more directly respect our slves and so take heed of Pride this was the Devils Sin and his Ruine and he would have us like him in both and do we not find our Spirits ready to be puffed up on this occasion I dare say they are no ordinary Christians with whom its otherwise Again Take we heed of Security when our Mountain seems to stand strong it s well if our Hearts say not next it shall never be moved take heed of that Again Take we heed of Prodigality an unlawful excessive wastful Spending or spending Wastfulness of the Creature I remember a choise Servant of God one that hath laboured much amongst us once when I was with him in a fit of Sickness taking a Medicine he called for the Spoon back to lick it saying Jesus Christ would have nothing lost in which as I concluded he had reference to his ordering the Fragments to be gathered up after that large and plentiful Feast upon a few Barly-loaves and two or three small Fishes Again Take we heed of Sensuality our Lusts will expect our Prosperity should be a Feast for them they will crave it and the Devil will sollicite for them but these Beggers must be denied we must take heed of sensuality and of worldiness take heed of sinful inordinate pantings after love to use of or delights in the Creature This as to the first General 2. We must labour to get acquainted with and then conscientiously and diligently to discharge those Duties and exercise those Graces which this Estate gives us a special call to and advangage for And 1. Those which more directly respect others And so 1. Those which more immediately respect God himself and so we must own and acknowledge God as the free and gracious author founder and maintainer of our Prosperity and then it naturally follows hence that we be thankful to him for it and here a true Christian hath far the Advantage of another Man and is thereby laid under a stronger Obligation to this Duty for he may see his outward Prosperity his outward Mercies coming from that self same loving Hand and Heart that gave him his dear Christ O how thankful should a Christian be In a mercy that in it self may be but small yet may he see and tast that which is of more worth then a World this is no phanatical Dream but a proved and experienced Truth Again Doth it not also follow that we should love him more dearly Love would and should be paid in its own Coin and by the way observe it if we can but find this that we love God more for our outward Prosperity this would be an infallible sign that it comes from his Love for as one saith this is a certain Rule that which causeth love cometh from love and then see that we grieve more ingenuously for our Sins against him and the consideration of the cursed Ingratitude and Disingenuity that there is in our Sin 's sure this will when the Spirit strikes it home open a Vein to purpose in a gracious Heart Again Let us see we learn to trust in him more stedfastly we have promises and experiences too see we trust him in our Prosperity see we trust in him and not in uncertain riches friends or the like and if he bring us into straits again let us now learn to trust him then trust him for these things if they be good for us however that he will give us that in himself which is infinitely better and so le ts learn to trust him for better things if from his Love he give us Earth will he not much more give us Heaven and all that we need in the way And then le ts see we make him the chief object of our delight and joy Again Let 's see we be more abundant vigorous and chearful in his Service in all acts of Obedience 2. Those which more directly respect our Brethren and so we must see we be humble courtious and affable in our Carriage towards them and that we do heartily pity and compassionate them in their Necessities and Troubles and that we do actually relieve and help them as we have abillity and opportunity remembring that the Lord hath more backs to cloath more bellies to fill more hearts to chear with our Prosperity then our own and as we must thus labour to get acquainted with and then conscientiously and diligently to discharge those Duties and exercise those Graces which a prosperous Estate calls to and gives us advantage for with respect to others So 2. Those which do more immediately respect our selves such as self-denial moderation holy contentation a grave and sober joy and rejoycing weanedness from the World heavenly mindedness and the like But I fear I have enlarged too much and would fain leave a little room for the last thing and so as that I may not streighten others neither So 3. As we would thus improve our outward Prosperity as hath been confusedly hinted we must carefully observe and follow some rules and directions To name five or six 1. We must labour to get throughly convinced of our own Impotency and utter insufficiency to do this of our selves and truly we know e'ne nothing of our selves if we know not this that of our selves without Christ we can do nothing alass we can't bare a Cross no more can we handle a single Comfort as we ought then what shall we do in a State of full Prosperity especially if of any long continuance How certainly it sinks us into security sensuallity worldliness into a neglect of God our Souls Eternity and the like if left to our selves 2. We must see to it that we be Christians indeed that we have a thorough work of Grace wrought in our Hearts there are many Natural carnal Men that know what it is to be in Prosperity what it is to Abound but not one of them knows how to Abound nor can they know any thing of it while they so continue in the right improving of Prosperity there are many spiritual Acts and Motions required as you have heard but this cannot be
of his Mouth but he hath it 2. In what he doth we should watch and take great notice what the Lord is doing observe gracious merciful so likewise more severe and afflictive Providences when they come that so we may answerably receive entertain and improve them both we should thus heedfully watch and observe such Providences whether dispensed to our selves or to others to our Persons Families Relations or to other particular Persons Families Societies Nations or Churches 3. We should particularly watch and observe what Answers the Lord is pleased at any time to give into our Prayers this the Lord requires of us and justly expects from us both upon his own Account and ours too whatever the Answer be if we do not thus look up and watch after our Prayers we provoke the Lord who justly looks upon himself as affronted hereby more ways then one and we likewise wrong our own Souls which are like by this means to suffer damage several ways but the contrary would both please him and be much to our own Advantage this is one way whereby we may come to enjoy more in the Mercies we so get and also to get more of them I know a Person whose experimental Observation it is that the more he doth with humility and thankfulness observe and take notice of God's gracious Answers of Prayer the more sweet Matter of that kind the Lord is wont to give him in for his Observation 2. Our watch must extend it self to others to our Neighbours but especially to our Christian Brethren those especially that we are joined with in the same Christian Society though Christianity doth not allow us to be busy bodies in other Men's matters yet neither doth it allow us to be of that wicked Persons mind who said am I my Brothers keeper But 3. It must especialy be exercised towards our selves we must see to keep our own Vineyard and so we must watch over our Thoughts Affections our Words and Actions Or thus we must watch 1. Over our inward Man 2. Over our outward Man 1. Over our inward Man And that 1. As depraved by Sin 2. As renewed by Grace 1. As depraved by Sin and here a great part of our Work lieth our worst most mischeivous dangerous and deadly Enemies ly in our own Bosoms a hellish brood of filthy Lusts which are ever ready to betray and ruine us Satan indeed hath a great hand in undoing Souls but the truth is he might spare his Pains did the Lord but stand by our own Lusts would do the work effectually themselves we have reason to conclude that we should go to Hell readily enough of our selves did but the Lord suspend withdraw his Spirit and Grace and so let us go quietly such Enemies as these sure need watching 2. As renewed by Grace alass Grace in many of our Hearts I am sure I must my self subscribe for one I say it is a poor small weak and tender thing if it be not very sickly declining and languishing this poor thing meets with great Opposition a world of enemies both within and without that it is as strange a wonder that it should be kept alive in our Souls as that a spark of Fire should be kept burning in a great quantity of Water we have need to watch our Graces if we would have them kept alive and much more if we would have them lively we must watch to the feeding and nourishing to the preserving and defending to the acting and exercising and so to the increasing and strengthening of them in our Souls we must watch over our inward Man 2. Over our outward Man over our outward Senses O how much Sin and Vanity is almost contiunally either coming in or going out that way unless streightly watched We have need to set a strict watch a strong guard upon each of them and so we read of holy Job's making a Covenant with his Eyes and of David's setting a watch at the door of his Lips And so we have need to watch as to the whole of our outward Carriage and Behaviour to see that it be such as becometh the Gospel 4. We must watch over our two grand Enemies without us Satan and the World Satan in his Temptations He is such a subtil powerful cruel and malicious Enemy hath so many Snares for us and is so good at the choosing and at the laying of them that without extraordinary care and watchfulness it is in an ordinary way impossible that our Souls should in any tollerable manner escape him And so the World is a near a present and very mischievous Enemy to our Souls we have need to watch the Men of the World and the Things of the World both good and evil for we are endangered by them all thus we must manage our watch universally 3. Diligently so the Charge runs Prov. 4.13 And the truth is our Case is such that its absolutely necessary it should be so without diligence in our watch we do nothing however that which is next to it a Town that is closely besieged by a potent Enemy that hath also within its Walls a strong treacherous Party ever watching for an opportunity to betray it to the Enemy without sure such a Town had need to keep a diligent watch the case stands thus with our poor Souls 4. Wisely and Prudentially one might instance here in many things I will hint only in a few touching the Corruptions of our own Hearts and the Temptations of Satan we must watch Sin so we must wisely observe and watch the first motions and stirrings of it to suppress them watch the occasions of Sin to avoid them watch to cut of that which feeds our Lusts we see how vigilant and industrious Men are to cut of Supplies from an Enemy with whom they are engaged in War This is a great piece of Spiritual Policy also we must watch all Sin in general but above all our special Sins so we must watch Satan in all his Temptations but especially in that which is as it were his Master-piece we must watch at all times but especially at such times as use to be most critical and dangerous ones with us with respect to the Prevalency of Corruptions and Temptations as such as are Persons of any tollerable Observation may find that there are sometimes more critical and dangerous with them this way then others 5. Prayer fully the truth is whatever Spiritual Work we take in hand humble fervent believing Prayer must come in at one End or we are like to make but poor Work of it and as to this of Watchfulness in particular if we do not thus engage the Lord to watch over our watchings all will be but labour in vain our Lord knew full well what he did when he linked these two together in his Charge watch and pray 6. And to add no more it must be constantly and perseveringly while we are here we are in our enemies Country and so are never out of danger and
therefore we should never let down our watch but here lieth the misery of it which undoes us though at sometimes we may make Conscience of this Duty yet by and by we grow careless and secure let down our watch and so we loose our selves extreamly and let our vigilant Enemies get great advantage against us and moreover some of us may find our bad Hearts most prone to this after the greatest enlargments in the exercise of Grace or after the largest incomes of the spiritual Joy and Comfort but alass this is perfect nonsense in Religion for this is one time in which we are in the greatest Danger and so a special Season for the strictest watch at such a time the Devil hath the most aking Tooth at us and bears us the greatest Malice and revengful Spite Thus we must endeavour to manage this Duty obedientially universally diligently prudently prayerfully constantly and perseveringly this is easily said but not so easily done we must remember that serious Religion is a Labour and a Mistery but withal for our encouragement that it is the most Honourable Pleasant and Profitable one and that in it we have not to do with such a hard Task-master as Pharaoh was who required full Tale of Brick yet would not allow the People Straw CHAP. X. A Preparation for Parting with RELATIONS I Am convinced that an entire humble and chearful Resignation of my Will to the Will of God manifested in the all-wise and gracious Disposals of his Providence towards me is both my Duty and great Felicity And that I am bound to labour after such a Frame when under the sadest of his Dispensations I have reason to conclude that the loss of near and dear Relations will set me hard indeed God hath hitherto wonderfully indulged me in this Matter that I have not yet known by Experience what such Tryals are But I cannot in the Course of Nature reasonably expect to be long exempted from them therefore cannot but look upon it as a great piece of Wisdom to get armed and prepared for them and here I think it may not prove an unprofitable fruitless Labour to draw up some such weighty Considerations as may tend to work up my Heart to the Frame forementioned that so I may have them in readiness against that time when I shall find my self very unfit and indisposed for such a work and here I am the more confirmed when I reflect upon the late disturbance of my Mind when the Lord was pleased to bring my dear Father exceeding low even so low that I concluded it had been just at the parting pinch whose Death I will here suppose yet would I beware of the contrary Extream a Stoical Frame and Disposition being contrary both to the Principles of Piety and Humanity Here I would consider 1st The supream full and absolute Right and Propriety which God hath in me and in all which I call mine the Earth is the Lord's and the fulness thereof The World and all they that dwell therein a little while since I was not even till God made me And every moment I should drop into my Primitive nothing did he not powerfully and graciously Sustain me besides I am by Sin exposed to those Miseries which are more deplorable then Annihilation it self from which he hath by a miracle of wisdom condecension and love redeemed me from hence its evident that I am not my own but his So neither do I enjoy any thing which I can strictly and properly call my own no thing 's so mine but that he hath a clearer Right and juster Claim unto it I received all at the Hands of his Bounty and am to possess only during his Pleasure though he hath conferred many Favours upon me yet I am to remember this that he hath not given away his own Right No his Right in his Creatures is unalienable hath the Lord now resumed one of my dearest Comforts taken away my Father Is not this one Consideration enough to justify him and calm and quite me May not the Lord do what he will with his own And was he not his more then mine His Creature his Child his Minister O let me dread mutining against his Providence but be in subjection to him the Father of Spirits and live Let me think with my self it is the Lord and let his Excellency make me afraid Be still and know that he is God be dumb not opening my Mouth because he hath done it For who am I that I should stubbernly contend with my Maker who is the Lord of all 2dly The Righteousness of God in all his Dispensations towards me though he sometimes doth Afflict yet he doth not he cannot wrong me had he not freely engaged himself he had been free from all Engagements to the most innocent Creatures so that he might have annihilated them or used them at his Pleasure without the least shew of wrong or injustice Hath not the Potter power over the Clay But alass I am a sinful guilty Wretch as I received all at the Hands of his free Grace and Favour so have I forfeited all into the Hands of his Justice hath the Lord now taken the Forfeiture of this choice Mercy at my Hands I ought surely to ascribe Righteousness to my Maker doubtless Righteousness establisheth his Throne the Justice and Equity of his Laws and of his Providence are equally unquestionable And therefore should I fear as by Disobedience to reflect upon the one so by Impatience upon the other would not Conscience presently step in instead of a thousand Witnesses against me should I once dare to think God Unrighteous in this sad Dispensation Will not my Relative sins besides an innumerable Multitude of others together with the Corruption of my Nature which I brought with me into the World from whence all proceedeth be enough to stop my Mouth O! Have I not rather cause humbly to admire at the abundance of Mercy that is mixed with the heaviest Afflictions that at any time light upon me here Cause to stand and wonder that I am not made as Miserable as Misery it self as Hell it self can make me Surely the Lord punisheth me far less then mine Iniquities have deserved otherwise I had long since been in Hell amongst Devils and damned Spirits as in point of Obedience the Lord is now graciously pleased to accept of far less then is his dew so in point of Suffering I have far less then is mine And therefore should I patiently submit unto humbly and thankfully accept of the present Punishment of mine Iniquities it is my Duty to bear the Indignation of the Lord graciously and good reason why I should because I have sinned against him 3dly As his Right and Righteousness are unquestionable so his Power is irresistible He doth whatsoever he will both in Heaven and Earth and there is none that may stay his Hand or say to him what dost thou Sure then it were folly and madness with a witness for me
know this Sin is most odious and unaccountable in Beggars and therefore in my poor beggarly Soul Dear S. I could tell you a long and sad Story of a poor young Man under twenty Years of Age who finds the old Man the body of Sin exceeding strong who many Years since did lamentably Experience the sad Fruits and Effects of original Corruption and that fears that to this day his Lusts gather strength on him instead of his geting ground on them finding that his natural sinning Principles are not idle but ever active and finding farther that his frequent Acts of Sin have greatly encreased and strengthned the habit so that now his Lusts do lord and domineer it over him at such a strange rate that he is ready to fear sometimes that in the end his Iniquities will be his Ruin that he shall one day fall by the hands of his Lusts which are got to such a head now that they value not his Prayers or any other Means that he can use against them of a Rush Do you not pity such a One Methinks I see you ready to weep over Him and engraving his Condition upon your Heart that so you may ever remember him when you go before the Lord why to deal plainly with you I am he and do not entertain such a foolish Thought as if I spoke worse of my self then I deserve indeed I do not know how to do that I do not fear wronging this naughty sinful Heart and Nature of mine O what a mirror of Sin and Impiety I am Yet who in my Circumstances so sensless Indeed I have a Hankerchief lying by me but God knows I have little need of or use for it and much more may I say my dear Saviour hath full little need of one for my Heart though he be willing and ready yet I do not give him occasion for the Execution of his Office who is the binder up of broken Hearts but Lord who is it that can break my Heart but thee O first wound and then heal I bless thee for that little small degree of Sensibleness thou hast given me O encrease it But yet Lord how long shall this be the best Chear I have to weep and mourn over my head strong Lusts When wilt thou by thy Omnipotent Grace help me down with them When shall a day of triumph come Dear Lord after thou hast got the Victory wilt thou suffer these thy Enemies to come and spoile thee of thy conquest in my Soul Surely thou wilt not Break not the bruised reed squench not the smoaking flax despise not the day of small things say to me thy grace is sufficient for me I am thine save me But I would not be too tedious dear S. I beg you would go and spread the sheet before the Lord which represents my Condition unto you though not so bad as it is for indeed I want Words to express my own Vileness by I had almost thought to bid you take a view of him that is called the wicked One if you would see a Picture of my wicked Heart However think of the vilest Wretch you know on Earth and if I any way differ from him no thanks to me for that therefore think more meanly of me and pray the Lord to subdue my Pride and help me to entertain low and mean Thoughts of my Self I do not know any Child of God that hath so much cause to be broken and humble as my self But I forget my self for its time to break of I assure you you have no small share in my Affections who hath great cause to subscribe my self as one of the holy Martyrs did a proud and hard-hearted Sinner I. B. LETTER IV. To S. E. September 6. 1684. Dear S. I Receiv'd your refreshing Letter and blessed be God-that I did so for verily it put a little Life and Comfort into my Soul I hope you will excuse the rudeness of any Expression in my last and I return you thanks for your good Councel not to deny the Grace of God O I would not do so indeed sometimes poor Soul have such bleared Eyes with Sorrow for Sin that they are prone to overlook God's Graces O that I may never be guilty of such Ingratitude But no great danger of it upon this Account while my Heart is so hard O for more Humiliation and more Sorrow Alass I am not one of those weepers that take on so for Sin its true I am apt enough to overlook God's Grace but it s from another a contrary Cause Dear S. my Condition is really the same as I hinted to you and much worse You may make your own to be somewhat like it bless God that gives you to think low of your Self Well I would say something to the Encouragement of us both be it granted that our Condition is such and such yet as you say there is Merit and Satisfaction enough in Christ and there is Mercy and Pity enough in him and in his Father through him for the worst of us even my self our Corruptions are strong What then Are they too strong for his Omnipotent Grace O no they cannot stand before it believe me Sister though we be weak in our selves yet we have mighty strong Friends God and Jesus Christ and the holy Spirit of Grace are on our sides What then shall we be afraid and utterly dejected at the Thoughts of our Enemies O no for shame they be more that are with us then they that are against us God is my Covenant engaged to carry on the Work that he hath begun think often of that sweet Place that hath oft revived me I will not break the bruised reed He will not do it himself nor suffer any else to do it yet how hard it is to believe such things to believe them soundly I say when we are under our discouragements Well let us walk humbly but no longer sadly and disconsolately it pleaseth the Devil when he seeth his Design take so well with us as it doth when he can deprive us of Peace and Comfort but our sad disconsolate Looks are no Satisfaction or Pleasure to our gracious Father He is no farther pleased with our Sorrow then as it prepares us for the discharge of higher Duties and the exercise of higher Graces he had rather see our Souls elevated in the highest strains of Love Joy and Praise well study we now in every thing to please him and that which is our Duty in this as well as in all other things would be our great Priviledge I was troubled to hear that she whom I lov'd was Sick but glad to hear you are better my Prayer for you is that all things may work together for your Good your Mercies and your Afflictions I look upon as my own The Lord bless you with Pardon Grace and Peace Farewel I am your truly Affectionate and Loving Brother I. B. LETTER V. To S. E. September 30. 1684. Dear S. I Receiv'd your's and am glad
be more in our thoughts is the Prayer of your poor Brother weak in Grace and low in Comfort I. B. LETTER IX To S. E. January 13. 1684 5. Dear S. I Receiv'd your's and am glad to hear of the removal of that afflictive Distemper you have of late been under a mercy I have been often seeking to God for for which I am with you obliged and shall endeavour to bless the Lord I am rejoyced to hear you are so much upon the praising pin O that I could but learn that heavenly Note But O what a strange lumpish Heart have I I talk of Heaven Of an Eternity to be spent in the love and joyful Praises of God and a dear Redeemer Truly it is a shame while my Heart is so backward to and unskilful in this blessed Work O had Heaven no better singers then I am or am like to make what poor harmony what harsh melody would there be among them But for the eternal Praise of the great Jehovah it shall not be thus many times when I hear the pretty Bird's singing forth his Praises in their kind I am ashamed of my self I am generally secure and senseless sometimes sad but seldom joyful 1st Oh how secure and dead I am many times I have scarce any Sense or feeling of Spiritual things upon my Heart I have such a senseless benumed Conscience through Custom in Sin that I feel little of the weight and burthen of it or of my need of a Saviour alass while others are joyfully prasing God and a dear Redeemer I have need to pray for a more awakned Conscience and for more Sorrow for Sin 2dly When my Conscience doth begin to speak home and my Heart doth a little relent then either my Sorrow is slighty and superficial not bearing a proportion to my Sins O how many Tears I have need to weep over as not coming from a Heart thoroughly sensible of Sin Or else I am ready to be dejected but it is more rarely thus with me I mostly err on the other hand But then 3dly When shall you find me in a joyful thankful praising frame The Lord hath laid me though an unworthy wretch under many obligations I do not want Matter whereof to compose my Song but alass I want a musical Heart well I yet hope that in Heaven if the Lord will bring me thither at last I hope then he will change my Note That I shall then have no more cause to complain of this Heart of mine but shall then with an innumerable Company of Angels and Saints sing a new Song to him that sits upon the Throne and to the Lamb for ever and ever Amen I am your Loving Brother I. B. LETTER X. To S. E. February 5. 1684 5. Dear S. I Receiv'd your's and return you thanks for it and for your I do not doubt hearty Prayer for me for spiritual Joy but O that you would help me to pray more Sorrow into my Heart first you tell me I know what they shall reap that sow in tears to wit Joy But if that be Scripture as I know it is I may expect but a small Crop not that I think my Tears can wash away the Guilt of the least Sin or merit the least favourable Glance of God's Countenance but Repentance of which Godly sorrow is one part is a necessary Qualification O therefore pray for more of that and herein you will exceedingly befriend me I am afraid you are exceedingly mistaken in me I do not wish you so ill as you wish your self to be in my State and Frame Sure I am if you did believe the Discription I have given you of it which I do again own and acknowledge to be worse then I did or can discribe to you you would not wish so however if I do think worse of my self then I should which yet I am confident I do not yet sure I am you err more on the other hand in thinking better of me then I deserve and be not troubled at my Complaints O will you not give me leave to Complain Was I under any outward Trouble I am sure you would and that you would gladly endeavour to help me too and will you not give me leave to Complain of my Spiritual wants and burthens What want Grace and not Complain Be so doged with such domineering Lusts and hanted with such impetuous Temptations as I am and not Complain Give me leave and will you not do what you can to help me O if you love me help me down with my Lusts by your Prayers but I will not longer detain you I am your Loving Brother I. B. LEETTER XI To S. E. March 8. 1684 5. Dear S. I Receiv'd your's but have time to write but a line or two I was sorry to hear of the return of your Ague but am glad to hear it hath left you again O that all fatherly Corrections might leave us better then they find us I saw my F. lately and was glad to here there was hopes of your getting home I would not have you think I forget you as to that business you hint at I know not how to advise you my self but I shall endeavour to pray for you to him that can however one thing I will say acknowledge the Lord in all your ways then take his Word for it that he will direct your Steps I am ready to think from some Circumstances that there may be something of Providence in it but let us wait a while and see what the Lord will do I am your Loving Brother I.B. LETTER XII To S. E. April 9. 1685. Dear S. I Receiv'd your's and was much perplexed in my Mind not understanding your meaning in some Passages of it as to your coming home I cannot but desire it and methinks it is plainly your Duty considering the Circumstances that you are in and considering your poor Parents how crazy they are and in what need they stand of your help Dear S. have a care of giving way to melancholy discontented Thoughts remember former Experiences that you have had of God's goodness have you not many a notable one I believe you have if you do but think on them I remember an Expression of my Father old Sins and old Mercies should not be forgotten we should not give way to any more Sorrow for Sin than we can give a good Account of much less then for any outward Trouble and what matter is it if the Lord should mark us out for Crosses and Troubles here if he will but mark us out for himself mark us out for Heaven O Sister all will be well in the End How short is this Life if we should have nothing else but Trouble here Then comes Heaven the day is at hand and then all is forgotten O nothing but joy nothing but joy in Heaven remember that Sister the thoughts of Heaven are my own and as thy own what would such Thoughts do Would they not make all our Troubles here
may be of good Use to many Souls I would not have you give them away all at once hand over head but as prudently as you can not to such where you can have no rational hope but that they will be quite thrown away and where you do bestow them I desire you would give some good Advice both to Parents and Children and follow it with your Prayers and as you have opportunity be enquiring whether they make any use of them or no and accordingly in the Spirit of Love and Meekness either reprove oxhort or encourage as there is occasion and the Lord crown your endeavours that way with Succes I received a Letter from the Reverend Mr. F. wherein he advised that the School Dame should be encouraged by some quarterly Pension to teach her Scholars the Catechisms and that some poor Children be put to School I much approve his Advice and gave G. thanks for it if you have seen him since I question not but he hath acquainted you with my Desire that you would seasonably and prudently go about it the whole business is much upon my Heart having a longing desire after the Salvation of your poor Country Men's Souls I should be glad to hear from you sometimes how things go on and I would fain know which is your Fortnight day that I might more particularly remember you then and the good Lord give us in some early and evident Token of his gracious Acceptance of us in this thing in revealing his Arm in his Word and Ordinances he is now pleased to send amongst you I have not time to add more now but intend to write to you again shortly Let me hear from you give my hearty Love to good Mr. P. and accept the same your Self I am your affectionate Friend I. B. If the School Dame will undertake it let all Her Scholars have Catechisms given them It hath pleased the Lord to put it into the Hearts of our Ministers and of a great Number of serious praying Persons among us to spend one Hour weekly apart in our Closets in earnest Prayer to G. for the Publick and particularly for this present Parliament which G. enabling us we intend to continue during their present Sessions the time is Tuesday Morning Seven a Clock As you meet with any serious Christians endeavour to engage them to the same Course and send away your enclosed to Mr. B. as speedily as possibly you can which goes upon the same Errand LETTER XXXIII To Mr. B. at Ford about the praying Project December 5. 1695. Reverend and dear Sir IT hath pleased the Lord to put it into the Hearts of our Ministers and of a great Number of serious and praying Persons in this Place to set apart one Hour every Week wherein in an humble wrestling Manner to seek the Lord as for his Church in general and especially amongst us in these poor sinful Lands so particularly for this present Parliament which we intend to continue the Lord enabling us during their present Session we think there are many things which loudly bespeak and will sufficiently warrant such an Undertaking as this but if I should go about to mention them to you it would shew my Weakness if not something worse therefore I forbear I shall only in a few Words acquaint you first with our purpose and resolution as to our Practice which I have indeed in part done already and then with our humble Request unto you as to our own Resolution which we shall the Lord enabling us forthwith the ensuing Week put in Practice and continue during this present Session of Parliament it is to spend one Hour every Tuesday Morning beginning at Seven a Clock as near as we can each of us apart in our Closets in earnest wrestling with the Lord for his poor Church and particularly for this present Parliament O that they may be a band of Men whose Hearts the Lord hath touched O that he would make them reformers and healers to us And now our humble and earnest Request unto you is that you would put to your helping Hand and that you would speedily endeavour in such a way as your Prudence shall direct to engage as many of your serious praying People as possibly you can to set upon the same Work we thought it most Prudent to engage Persons by speaking to them privately and particularly but that and other Circumstances we leave to your prudent Management Only dear Sir let us stir up our selves and one another and once more see what Prayer will do And we do further Request that you will use your Interest in other Ministers that are near you but out of our reach to engage them and their several Congregations in the same Work and also to use their Interest to engage others and when you have an opportunity I should be exream glad to hear in a few Lines what is done in this Affair amongst you I have divers others to write unto upon the same Account so must take leave beging a particular Remembrance of you in your Prayers who am one extream needy though very unworthy of the same I am dear Sir Very affectionately Your's I. B. LETTER XXXIV To dear H. London about the praying Project January 18. 1665 0. Dear and much Honoured Sir UPON the receipt of a considerable spiritual Mercy the latter end of November last as I was projecting what return to make it pleased the Lord to direct my Thoughts and strenuously to encline them to this Scil. to attempt the engaging of a weekly Hour of Prayer by Persons apart in their Closets ' as for the universal Church of God and especially that part of it amongst us in these poor sinful Lands so particularly for this present Parliament and he hath been pleased to succeed my poor Endeavours herein to the actual engaging of a great Number of excellent pious praying Ministers and private Christians as in this so likewise in divers neighbouring Countries as Darbyshire Leicestershire Yorkshire Cheshire and Lancashire my poor Thoughts have again and again been looking towards London where I know there are vast Numbers of such as are Princes upon their Knees but have had those discouragements arising in and from my Self as have hitherto laid an embargo upon my Pen indeed I was ready all along to fear as I had just Reason that this Religious project would if it took in the main yet suffer much damage by its passing through my sorry Hands but meeting with unexpected Success to my very great surprizing Joy I am now encouraged to hoist the Sails and make this further and higher Adventure O that it may be as prosperous yea more abundantly so And I am the more encouraged because I have your dear Self whose prudence zeal and interest in the Hearts of others I have such a full satisfaction of to apply my self unto And now dear Sir my humble and earnest Request is That you will be please to take the first convenient Opportunity
you have to acquaint some of your Pious publick spirited Ministers with it such as have the greatest Interest in and Influence upon others and endeavour to engage them to the like Undertaking and to use their utmost Endeavour to engage the rest of their reverend Brethren in and about the City and each of them in such a way as their Prudence shall direct to engage as many of their serious praying People as possibly they can that as there is great need there may be a confederate humble violence used and as general an attack as may be made upon the Gates of Heaven Our time is Tuesday Morning Seven a Clock as near as we can Your Circumstances in the City may much differ from our's in the Country and however I well not presume to hint any thing by way of direction here but give me leave to renew my humble earnest Request that you would be please to Concur with us in the Thing and then whether you shall please to take the Field before upon that or on the preceding Day or whether you please to follow after with your Recruits to make a fresh and more vigorous Attack if we have you but for our Confederates we still have our wish indeed at first for some Reasons I thought it best to engage Persons to continue this Course out only during this present Session of Parliament though I then had it in my Eye and seasonably shall the Lord permitting and enabling me actually endeavour the continuance of it longer in short Sir either till Mercy comes or a prohibition of Prayer the latter of which the Lord grant never may If it doth then farewel all Methinks there is no way like it but if it shall please the Lord further to smile upon me in inclining your Heart to undertake and in succeeding you herein you shall hear more of that methinks there are many things which loudly bespeak and will sufficiently warrant such an Undertaking our own Case as well as that of other poor Churches is very pressing verily Sir our ordinary way of Praying will not do will not pass now O that we could in good earnest fall to wrestling Alass Sir how the Credit of Prayer is fallen in the World of late Our Enemies do not fear Prayers as they have done and truly if my poor sad Case be that of others of God's People I am afraid the reason is that neither our Graces nor our Lusts seek our Prayers as they should do if they did our Enemies would soon be taught to fear Prayer again let us therefore stir up our selves and one another and once more see what Prayer will do would it but please the Lord to raise the old Spirit of Prayers in the Hearts of his People and enable them rightly to follow their Prayers in their Lives might we not look upon this as a comfortable Presage of some notable Appearance of his for his Interest amongst us The holy fervent Prayers of his People formerly used to pass currant with him for a whole Kingdom sure we are reduced to sore Extremities indeed if our Prayers be so clipt as our Coin that the praying Soul can now only save One but if I should go about to use any Arguments with you in such a business as this I should herein forget my self for I question not but you are and will be more ready then poor unworthy I of you own accord if any thing of this Nature be done amongst you then take no notice of this poor Scrible if not I doubt not but you will speedily and vigorously set your Self to the promoting of it and the Lord be with you to direct assist and succeed you If you will please to conceal my Name in this Business which can give no advantage to it you will oblige me I shall impatiently long for a few Lines from you about it and surely good News would be to my Soul as cold Water to the Thirsty But I have been over tedious and troublesome and may well reckon that before this I have tired your Patience and so must think of a close I earnestly beg a particular Remembrance in your Prayers who alass am still a poor sinful needy unworthy useless good for nothing My humble Service to your good Lady I am dear Sir your very affectionate humble and much obliged Servant Jo. Barrett LETTER XXXV To Dr. London about the praying Project February 26. 1695 6. Dear and much honoured Sir YOUR'S I receiv'd which upon a double Account was very welcome to me blessed be G. since my last there is a comfortable change in my Father who presents his Service and Thanks to you the last Lord's day he was enabled for his Work here amongst us I rejoyce in your ready compliance with my former request which indeed I did not doubt of what need there is of that Duty O how soon may we have a loud providential Call to it My Heart oft trembles within me I cannot I cannot but meditate Terrour when I seriously think of poor England's Case is not the Lord very angry with us Is he not e'en wary with forbearing Is not wrath e'en ready to fall I should be glad if I was alone in these Apprehensions or if I durst look upon them in my self and others as the meer products of a melancholly Phancy but alass it s otherwise therefore let us Pray dear Sir speed the thing all you can O how soon it may in some respects be too late I hope some of us fin'd since this was set on foot amongst us some reviving of a Spirit of Prayer but our fears of impending Judgments not abated but however will it not be good for us that we be found preparing to meet our G. in the way of his Judgments and framing to put our selves into the Gap Will not this be more comfortable then to be found among those who are still further making a way unto his Anger Since my last I found amongst my Papers the Cities call to Prayer in 1693 would not something of that Nature be highly seasonable now But with humble Submission I think and earnestly desire that no time be limitted for the Contrivance of it let us Pray and not faint let us hold on until Salvation unto our God be our Song But there should be some alteration of the Hour in Summer what if it be from six to seven in Summer and from seven to eight in Winter Monday Morning doth not so well sute us here in the Country because many of our Ministers are forced to travel abroad to their Labours and cannot be so free as at home but pardon my boldness in hinting at these things I leave it to your Prudence whether you will mention them or no but dear Sir speed the Business all you can I am the rather urgent with you here because I have engaged my Friends only during this present Session of Parliament which I presume is not likely to be long and methinks I