godly Ministers in all ages have groan'd under this sad calamity Eli was a holy Priest of God but his two sons were Devils incarnate monsters of men scandalous sacrilegious and adulterous sons of Belial as appears 1 Sam. 2. And this is no rare thing that the Prayers Studies Sermons Examples of many good Ministers are often made successful to bring others to Heaven when they can by no means restrain their own children from running to Hell and their own children make them do the work of their Ministry with grief when often the children of drunkards worldlings and whoremongers will be their crown and glory in the day of the Lord Jesus 3. This is often true when both parents are godly indeed when either father or mother is wicked no marvel if the children be hardned in their sins by their examples but it 's usually seen that when children have both the instruction of the father and also the law of the mother and when they cry to all the Ministers and Christians about them to help them by their prayers and counsels to save their children yet all prevail not but the holy father and mother can scarce keep one anothers hearts from being broken by their stubborn and disobedient children 4. The children of godly parents often prove wicked when God doth sanctifie and bless and save the children of ungodly parents we see sometimes trees of righteousness growing in the families of the wicked when briars and thorns grow up in the families of the righteous We read Matth. 1. that Ahaz a very wicked king begat holy Hezekiah and good Hezekiah begat Manasseh who was an Idolater of the highest rate a Witch and such a bloody murderer that the Chronicle of his reign tells us 2 Kings 21.16 He shed innocent blood very much till he had filled Jerusalem from one end to the other though afterwards he is set forth to be the greatest pattern of the grace of God in the Old Testament as Paul is in the New Testament It is no new sight to see children of the best Saints in the way to Hell and children of Atheists and Persecutors in the way to Heaven Nay though some parents do persecute their own children for loving and fearing God yet they cannot debauch them when all endeavours of godly parents will not prevail to make their children hate sin and love God and this is one of the saddest instances of that great mystery of Providence mentioned Eccles 8.14 There he just men to whom it happeneth according to the work of the wicked again there be wicked men to whom it happeneth according to the work of the righteous 2. Head It is a very great calamity to godly parents to have wicked and ungodly children A foolish son saith the text is a grief to his father and bitterness to her that bare him To the same purpose is that Prov. 17.21 He that begetteth a fool doth it to his sorrow and the father of a fool hath no joy a foolish son damps all his joy and Prov. 19.13 A foolish son is the calamity of his father I shall set forth the greatness of this trouble by these Eight particulars 1. By the matter of these parents grief 2. By the passions that this calamity doth move and affect 3. By comparing this with other afflictions and shewing how this exceeds them 4. By shewing that this makes these parents do all their work with grief and sorrow 5. By shewing that this embitters all their other comforts 6. By the sad concommitants of it 7. By the several aggravations of it 8. By instancing in some cases wherein this calamity is more grievous First The matter of these parents grief is very sad as appears in these seven things 1. That their children are so defiled and debauched with sin which is so loathsome to these holy parents it vexed the righteous soul of Lot to see and hear the filthy conversation of the beastly Sodomites how grievous then must it be to these godly parents to see and hear the filthiness of their own dear children it is a grievous thing to a man that loves God and Godliness and Souls to see a drunkard staggering in the streets or to hear any man blaspheming and reproaching his Maker and Redeemer but none can tell but those that feel it what a sad spectacle it is to sober and godly parents to see their own children drunk or how it torments them to hear their own children lying and blaspheming God and his Saints 2. That their children are the children of the Devil and under the power of Satan and ridden by him and carried captive by him at his will it was a lamentable case of that good Mother who came to Christ saying Matth. 15.22 Have mercy upon me O Lord thou son of David my daughter is grievously vexed with a devil yet this was not her daughters sin but only her great affliction but how doleful is it to these parents who have renounced the devil themselves and live in continual warfare with him to see the hearts and mouths and lives of the children whom they have devoted to God fill'd and possess'd with the devil whose children they are and whose lusts they will do if the devil tempt the parents their own graces will resist and overcome his temptations but they cannot secure their children from being overcome and from falling into the condemnation of the devil but with sad hearts do see the Lyon of Hell running away with the lambs of their flock and cannot recover them 3. That their children are under the wrath and curse of God it did sadly affect the father of that lunatick son mentioned Matth. 17.15 to see his son fall oft into the fire and oft into the water How would he screech at such a sight and cry Ah my dear child will be burnt my child will be drown'd but much more terrible is it to these parents who know the terrors of the Lord to know that their children have cut off the entail of the Covenant of Grace and are every moment ready to fall into the hands of the living God! when such parents are with faith reading the curses of Gods Law how doth it cut them to the heart to think that they are then reading their childrens doom 4. That their children are under those black characters which are given in Scripture to ungodly men for the faith of these parents makes all persons have that name in their hearts which they have in the Word And as God is no respecter of persons so Faith so far as it prevails respecteth not the persons of any no not of a mans own children but because they are more under their notice and observation than others and because they are more concern'd for them therefore the deeper impressions do these characters make on their hearts so that this is the misery of these parents that whilest they look on persons through the glass of the Scriptures and see many to be the
was said before they cannot be so much the joy and delight of one another but when they lye down this makes them water their bed with tears and they awake with sorrow with a wicked child on their hearts 2. They cannot take so much comfort as they would in the other children that are godly not that they love them less but rather more but their joy in them is much interrupted hereby Suppose among many children there be but one ungodly child that one is a disturbance and annoyance to the whole family that one sinner as Solomon speaks in a more general case destroys much good it grieves them to think that whereas that one child was in the same Covenant and had the same dedication to God by Baptism and the same affection and education from the parents with all the other children yet the rest are vessels of mercy but this seems to be a vessel of wrath 3. They cannot take so much comfort in the victory over their own sins when they see the same corruptions which are abhorred and mortified and forsaken by the parents breaking out and reigning in the children 4. This interrupts their joy in God and Jesus Christ when such parents must with the same faith believe Gods wrath to their children as they believe his love to themselves and when they look upon God as their Father they must look upon him as an enemy to their Children and when they say We hope Heaven is our portion and place it must grieve them that their children will not go with them thither Sixthly The greatness of this affliction appears further by the concommitants of it I shall only instance in three things that usually accompany it which make it more grievous 1. Such children do often impoverish their parents Solomon tells us that a wicked child wasteth his father and chaseth away his mother such children care not if they starve their poor parents so that they can feed their own lusts and it 's often seen that a plentiful estate is consum'd by riotous children 2. Such children do often debauch and corrupt the other children and make their brethren in nature to be their brethren in iniquity and often their brothers and sisters are easier inticed to sin by a wicked brother than drawn to God by a godly father and if any of the other children be godly these wicked ones do hate and revile and persecute them like wicked Cain who slew his brother because his works were righteous 3. They bring reproach upon that good Religion which their good parents profess and practise and thus Eli's sons made men abhor the offerings of the Lord and with some the holy lives of the parents cannot wipe off the reproach which is cast on Religion by the wickedness of their children Seventhly The greatness of this affliction appears by these eight Aggravations of it 1. It aggravates their grief to remember what pleasure and delight these children were to them in their childhood it torments them now to see their sweet and pleasant smiles turn'd into scornful and disdainful looks at their parents and their pretty broken words turn'd into oaths and lies and other rotten speeches and to think that these who once were so forward to clasp about their necks and to kiss them and to run at their commands do now lift up the heel against them 2. It aggravates their sorrow to see themselves so miserably disappointed in their former hopes of these children Hope deferred saith Solomon makes the heart sick but to be cross'd and disappointed in hopes of so great mercy doth even break the heart When these parents remember how pleasant it was to them to hear these children lisp out their Catechisms and to hear their good words of God and Christ it cannot but be very grievous to them that the same children which they did with Hannah lend to the Lord should sell themselves to the devil 3. It aggravates their sorrow that their children are so void of love to their parents and to see that the company of lyars and drunkards and whoremongers and thieves is more delightful to them than the company of their parents 4. It aggravates their sorrow to look upon the holy children of others when they may say Yonder are children that make a glad father and mother when the children of our bodies and counsels and prayers and vows and tears live as if their father was an Amorite and their mother an Hittite 5. Aggravation is in case the parents have but one child and that proves foolish and disobedient and of this there be many instances the Scripture to set forth the saddest kind of mourning compares it to the mourning for an only son Jer. 6.26 Make thee mourning as for an only son most bitter lamentation Zech. 12.10 They shall mourn as one that mourneth for an only son I know these Scriptures speak of parents mourning for the death of an only son but it 's not so sad to follow an only son to the grave as to see an only child live to the dishonour of God to be a curse to his generation and to be continually destroying his precious soul it 's a very bitter case when as much love and kindness and care and cost and pains and prayers and fastings are bestowed upon one child as other parents bestow upon many children and notwithstanding all this one child should prove such a monster of wickedness as if the sins of many ungodly children met in him 6. Aggravation When Gods holy Ministers are the Fathers of fools which I have told you often happens and this is a most dreadful case for such who have the keys of the kingdom of heaven and yet must bind over their own children to the wrath of God such know the terrors of the Lord and the torments of Hell more than others and therefore must be more affected to believe that this at present is the portion of their own children 7. Aggravation When such children whom their parents design'd to serve God in the Ministry of the Gospel do prove ungodly this is matter of great lamentation for the parents to intend them for the highest office in the Church and give them education for that end that these children should make themselves as salt without savour which is good for nothing but to be cast out and trodden under foot of men 8. Aggravation When children are a grief to their parents in their old age and do as it were throw dirt upon their hoary heads which is their crown of glory it 's the command of God Prov. 23.22 Despise not thy mother when she is old Solomon tells us Eccles 12. That the days of old age are evil days their very age is a troublesome and incurable disease now the grashopper every light thing is a burden to them and therefore it must be more troublesome to them to be then tormented with wicked children when the strong men as Divines think Solomon calls the legs do
bow themselves and their children who should be a staff and support to them do break their hearts and cause their grey-hairs to go with sorrow to the grave I now come to make application of this discourse Vse 1. Let such parents praise and honour God whom God hath bless'd with wise and holy and obedient children whether by those words in Psal 144.12 David means children accomplish'd with natural or spiritual endowments or both I shall not determine but to apply them to the case in hand I say it 's the great mercy of God to you that when so many children are as noisome weeds your sons should be as hopeful plants grown up in their youth and when so many make themselves ugly and deform'd with sin your daughters should be as corner-stones in which is seen the beauty of the building and the art and skill of the workman polished after the similitude of a palace Do not hence conclude that you are better parents than others or have had more care in the education of your children than others but ascribe all to the free grace of God who will have mercy upon whom he will have mercy 2. Let none presume to censure godly parents for their wicked children To him that is afflicted saith Job pity should be shew'd him from his friend Have they not trouble enough already but will you add to their affliction They have not hereby forfeited the good thoughts and esteem which you should have of them and if you judge them for this ye must judge as wise and holy Saints of God as ever were in the world though God herein doth sharply correct them yet he will not allow you to sit in judgment and to pass sentence upon them I say to you as Job to his friends Hold your peace let them alone and leave them to stand or fall to their own Master 3. This should fill the hearts of these holy parents with revenge upon Sin and Satan which have so debauch'd and defiled and destroy'd their dear children If a man should murder your child a spirit of revenge would rise in you and you would say to such a one I will have thy life and blood for the life and blood of my child but Sin and Satan have destroy'd both the precious soul and body of the child therefore labour as for other reasons so for this also to be reveng'd of them Labour to do as David did by the Lyon and the Bear which took a Lamb out of his flock he slew both the Lyon and the Bear and delivered the Lamb so do all ye can to reseue your poor lambs out of the jaws of Satan however labour to hate Sin and Satan more to promote Gods honour and kingdom and the salvation of souls more and this is the way to be reveng'd on Sin and Satan for the ruine of your children 4. I do hence exhort all holy and obedient children to acknowledge the grace of God to them that they are or have been the joy and crown of their parents It is his distinguishing grace that made you to differ from all wicked children and perhaps from some that came out of the same womb and sucked the same mothers breasts as you did Consider four things which are great matter of praise 1. That ye are the children of holy parents that ye may comfortably come to God in prayer and say we are the children of thy servant our father we are thy servants and the children of thy handmaid our mother bless God for your parents good counsels and examples and for a great part of an age of prayers which ye are daily receiving the benefit of if your parents are dead and in heaven it may put you into a holy and spiritual frame to think of the graces of God that did shine in them 2. That the same graces which dwelt in your good parents are in you Paul speaks of it as matter of praise to God that the same faith was in Timothy which dwelt first in his Grandmother Lois and his Mother Eunice and the Apostle John rejoyced greatly that he found the children of the elect Lady walking in truth 3. That thou art freed from those stings of conscience which graceless children shall one day feel for their disobedience to their parents thou mayest joyfully reflect that thou wast the joy of thy holy parents and that their lives have been made sweeter and their crosses easier by thee that thou art the honour and seal of their holy education when wicked children are the shame and reproach of their parents 4. That thou hast a right to that rich and precious promise annext to the fifth Commandment and mention'd Ephes 6.2 3. So that thou may'st be assur'd that it shall go well with thee both in this world and in the world to come I do seriously profess I had rather have a right to that one promise made to obedient children than to the best estate and inheritance under the Sun I shall finish this discourse 1. In prescribing some means to be us'd by those that may be or are parents to prevent this calamity 2. I shall direct those parents that groan under this calamity how to bear it 3. I shall give a serious exhortation to such children who are the grief and bitterness of their parents First I shall prescribe means to be us'd to prevent this calamity 1. Use all holy prudence and care in your choice of a yoke-fellow for if ye make your selves the husbands or wives of fools ye are like in time to become the fathers or mothers of fools when before the flood the members of Gods Church married with a wicked generation Genes 6.2 they brought forth a wicked posterity but to have a holy yoke-fellow is the way to have a holy seed and therefore what ye would most desire to have for your selves that labour to find in the person who is to be one flesh with you thou wouldst have thy self born of God thou wouldst have the Image of God and the life of Christ in thy self Labour that these things be in the person whom thou chusest for thy yoke-fellow but never make choice of one for thy husband or wife whom thou shouldst not chuse for thy companion 2. Be faithful and upright with God Prov. 20.7 The just man walketh in his integrity and his children are blessed after him If you would have grace and mercy for your children love and please the God of all grace and mercy whatever secret sins are in thee kill those sins for thy poor childrens sake lest the sins you too much harbour in your own hearts do break out in your childrens lives Parents may often see their own sins against their heavenly father in their childrens disobedience to them when your children despise you remember your want of honour and fear and reverence of God when they vex and trouble you remember how ye have griev'd and provoked him when they decline your company remember how