so highly have I â—rovoked thee that unlesse thou â—ake pitty on mee and receive mee â—or his blood which was shed for mee I am lost eternally O my good Shepherd call mee thy lost sheepe home for lost I am unlesse thou call me lost for ever unlesse thou save mee CHAP. 71. Faith appeares unto him with a cheerefull presence affording him comfort in his affliction BEing thus afflicted inwardly and outwardly Faith appeared to mee but alas so much was I dejected that although I might have beenâ— moved to admiration with heâ— goodly presence and encouraged with her affable countenance I stood still perplexed being so farre from comfort as I scarcely expected it Which Faith well perceiving shee drew neare mee and pulling mee to her with a presence no lesse gracefull then cheerfull thus encounter'd mee How now Pilgrim have you seene so many dayes and those so full of misery and and can you find ought here where you have liv'd so long and found so small comfort that may deserve your teares Is the world this empty Sponge growne so neare to your heart as it has power to draw teares from your eyes Tell mee the ground of your griefe Doe you sorrow because Old-age comes upon you and you can live no longer or if you should live you cannot enjoy that fulnesse of youthfull pleasure which you formerly tasted or are you unwilling to forgoe your possessions to take a long leave of your friends or to be stript of those goodly honours which you here enjoyed No I hope you are wiser then to become so foolish a Mourner What is it then that has thus violently wrought upon your reason and brought your disordered thoughts unto this distraction Surely it must bee of some importance that has brought you into this disconsolate anguish But this I perceive to be a distemper of your mind and it shall bee our principall care upon discovery of your wound to apply a speedy cure Goe to then disclose your griefe freely and believe her who hates nothing more then breach of faith that upon your imparting of it you shall receive this friendly office from mee either to cure it or allay it Herewith I became so encouraged as I made a free discovery of the grounds of my affliction which shee tooke so well at mine hands as presently causing me to sit by her shee begunne to comfort me in this manner You have done wel in this discovery of your grief Wounds cannot be cured before they be opened Neither doe wee feare but by ministring some fitting prescriptions our endevours wil bring forth that good effect as you shall find great case in your afflictions You tell me how the Remembrance of your end is very terrible to you not so much in regard of your fear of Death as of that fearfull day of Iudgement after Death For you find in your selfe such an infinite and unsupportable weight of grievous sinnes pressing down-your soule even to the gates of Hell as lesse then grieve you cannot else were you insensible of the losse of a soule Trust mee Pilgrime so farre am I from sorrowing with you as I rejoyce in your sorrowing For this sense of your sinnes brings you to seeke for cure which had they not afflicted you and and brought you even to the pit-brinke had beene the least of your care It is well then for you that you are afflicted for else you might have gloried and fatned your selfe in your sinnes and so eternally perished Bee then of good comfort and suffer not Cains desperate conclusion to have any possession in you For I must tell you hee sinned more in saying Greater is my sinne then can be pardoned then in murdering his Brother For as in the one hee lay violent hand on the Image of God So in the other hee detracted from the highest and dearest prerogative belonging to God for there is no attribute wherewith hee is more delighted then to be styled a God of mercy We may safely then conclude That despaire is of a more high and hainous nature then any sin For tell me has not God himselfe with his owne mouth promised and is he not both able and willing to performe what hee hath promised That At what time soever a sinner doth repent him of his sin from the botome of his heart hee will put awdy all his wickednesse out of his remembrance Though late repentance then bee seldom true yet true repentance never commeth too late The good Thiefe had no sooner repented him of his sin and confessed Christ then he was even at the last hour received to mercy which example as it admits no such liberty as to encourage any to presume seeing there was but one nor to throw downe any into despaire seeing there was one Indeed there is nothing that endangers mans salvation more then by giving way to delay yet when the sorrowfull soule heartily repents him of what is past and with a constant religious resolve intends to redeeme the time to come his pious teares devout prayers holy resolves will find ready admittance to the Throne of Grace For as his mercy is above all his Workes so will hee shew it most on that worke which stands in most need of his mercy This I am sure your long experience not onely observed but plenteously tasted for else have those yeares of your Pilgrimage beene ill bestowed that hee is gracious merciful and long suffering Nay that it has been evermore the property of this good and carefull Shepherd to call home those that were wandring invite those that were withstanding expect those that were fore-slowing to embrace those that were returning Nay that it has bin ever the condition of this valiant Iosuah to exhort you to fight and so to helpe you that you might become Conqueror in that fight In one word it has beene ever his care to behold you when you were in the Battaile sighting to encourage you when you were failing and crowne you when you were vanquishing Come then tell mee are you wearied and so heavy laden that you must faint by the way if you bee not refreshed Behold how hee has invited you to come unto him where you may receive refreshment and comfort from him Bee not then wavering in the Faith but take fast hold of his promises who will not faile you and relye on his mercies which in your greatest straits will deliver you Bee faithful then unto the end and he wil give your hearts desire This Ladies exhortation afforded mee much comfort in this my affliction but much more when I knew who shee was for I had heard much of her though I was never till then well acquainted with her For so soone as I heard her name I began to be very confident that whatsoever shee spake came from good ground Nay I understood how no action were it never so good in its owne nature could subsist or become really good without her How she was the ground-worke of all
of all Company Thus with prophane prayers and treacherous teares did this Concupiscence of the flesh work upon me and I inclined mine â—are to her folly so as this Engine made the first Entry O in mercy looke downe upon me O my sweet Saviour for that precious flesh of thine which was nayled on the Crosse give mee grace to crucifie my flesh O let not sinne raigne in my mortall body but give me power to subdue it for my soules health and thy glory CHAP. 9. The Concupiscence of the eyes O Whither doe you haile me yee false spies what wrong have I done you that you should thus abuse me yee lay your trains for me in every place wheresoever I walke I can find no peace For can there be any peace to the wicked So long as I give eare to your inchantments So long as I suffer my eyes to bee led by you what comfort may I reap or what peace may I expect Dinah followed you and she was ravished and behold while I suffer my selfe to be led by such blind guides what else can I looke for but to bee deprived of mine honour O yee straying eyes how soone were you casting forth your fiery darts to surprize those who inclin'd to you Paradise could not be secured from you nor those two sole inhabitants free themselves from being wounded by you Eve saw the fruit and it was pleasant Bitter pleasure to bereave them their posterity of such an inheritance for ever And what doe I poor Pilgrim but deprive my selfe of all happinesse by giving way to your concupiscence I have lived in many places and conversed with men of all conditions and I found in persons of every quality a naturall pronenesse unto vanity but examining whence the grounds of those vanities came I found them proceeding from you from you those in-lets to all dis-obedience For were not you the cause those who are now proud contemning others and magnifying themselves above the condition of earth from whence they came would learne humility Those who are now covetous thinking that the earth has not enough to fill their mouthes would be contented Those who now give way to wrath would put on the spirit of meekenesse and learne to bee patient Those who are now eaten up with envy by wishing to others as to themselves would be charitably disposed Those who now riot out their time in the dainties and delicacies of earth would bee more temperate Those who now impaune their honour to the Harlot would be more contineâ—t Those who now spin out their time in security would bee better employed Oh sigh and groane poore unhappy Pilgrim take thy selfe now into the ballance weigh and examine thy selfe Let not one houre passe over thee without a sigh not a minute without a sob Take away the force of this Engine this fearefull Basiliske with incessant Rivers of teares Thou hast yet a little time left thee bestow not one moment of it but to Gods glory See how every minute thou art nearer unto death how those Messengers of the Grave tell thee thou canst not live long There is not the least graine of sand which passeth through this Crevit of thine houre-Glasse but may assure thee that thou art hasting on to the Sepulcher of thy Fathers Canst thou then find any time to game play and sport thy selfe in Idumaea seeing there is no way secure from snares no place that may promise peace Where if there bee any pleasures they are full of vanity or exceeding to an higher measure of ill they are nursed by iniquity Take them at the best they are mutable because subject to frailty but take them at the worst they are miserable because they deprive us of glory O benigne Iesu my sweet Redeemer quench these desires of my flesh and refresh me with the delights of thy spirit Let not the lust of the eyes have any power over me but exercise thou me in thy Law O my deare one bee not farre from me for if thou leave mee what shall become of me CHAP. 10. The pride of life POore pride what hast thou in thee that may please thee what good thing that may praise thee Can the Leopard pride himselfe in his spots or the Swan in her black feet What hast thou which thou hast not received and if received to whom is the glory to bee rendred Thou hast nothing of thy selfe but sinne and sinne begets shame What shame is it then to magnifie thy selfe in sinne Shall thine Horse or thy Speare save thee or shall the strength of an Hoast deliver thee Looke upon that vile matter whereof thou wert made Poore dust and ashes was thy moulding and to dust and ashes must be thy returning Is this cover of flesh such a dainty thing to glory in Must not the beauty thereof turne to rottennesse and corruption and the glory thereof sleepe in the dust Must not that faire front be pilled and her beauty pillaged Must not those sparkling lights which sometimes made others prisoners or which made thy selfe a prisoner by their wantonnesse become Lodges forlorne Lodges for wormes Must not that face now so phantastically in-laid with Love-spots become an horror to the beholder Must not every part or parcell of that goodly piece that faire building fall into ruine irreparable ruine Nothing then poore Pilgrim canst thou find without thee wherein thou maist justly pride thee Looke inward then and see if thou canst find any thing there that may procure thee favour in the presence of the Almighty by approving thee a sitting Instrument of his glory Ah me poore sinfull wretch what mountaines of heavy-pressing sinnes doe I feele ever ready to sinke down this surcharged vessell of my soule I begun no sooner to live then to love sinne No sooner to breath then breath forth the infection of sinne The world receiv'd me no sooner for a dweller then she admitted me for a sinner Sometimes indeed when so much grace was given mee I communed with mine own heart and begun to examine my selfe what I had done what works of mercy hast thou performed what actions of perfect obedience hast thou expressed Bring forth that poor man whom for Christs sake thou hast cloathed That hungry-starv'd soule whom for his precious sake thou hast relieved Were 't thou so poore as thou couldst not doe it Hadst thou not so much as one single mite nor one cuppe of cold water to bestow on Christs members Blush O blush thou wretched Pilgrim Thou hadst change and choice of cloathes and these in thy Wardroabe must lye rotting or to Moaths become feeding Thou hadst oyle and meale in thy Pitcher yea thy store-houses surfeted of plenty and thy wine-presses groaned in their fulnesse yet must the hungry soule perish rather then be relieved The thirsty die ere hâ—e bee refreshed The naked be utterly starved ere hee be cloathed Look then and take a full view of thine inward man and see if there be any thing in him that
our love unto God is to doe such works as are acceptable unto God Now he has already told thee what Works may best suit thee and such as may move him to take most delight in thee And these are those Seven workes of Mercy Now take a little time before time leave thee to examine thy self impartially what a kind of proficient thou hast beene in these Whether thou hast not so carelesly borne thy selfe towards God in performing them as thou maist worthily acknowledge thy failings in each of them O Lord open thou mine heart and give mee understanding in all things let mee open mine heart unto thee and poure my selfe forth before thee and suffer mee not to flatter my selfe in my transgressions lest I perish eternally Thou hast prepared mee the wayes wherein I am to walke O Lord make my wayes streight before thee and so water me with the dew of thy grace that I may bring forth fruites of repentance plenteously CHAP. 24. Teaching the ignorant BRing forth that Schollar whom thou hast brought up in Christs Schoole Whom hast thou fed with the milke of his word Whom hast thou seene carried away with the blast of every vaine doctrine and hast sought to reclaime him whom hast thou at any time perceived to bee ignorant in the principles of faith and hast taken paines to informe him whom scismatically affected and thou laboured to convert him whom seditiously minded and thou sought to compose him Hast thou taken pitty of thy Brothers ignorance and brought him to a knowledge of God and himselfe with the spirit of meekenesse Nay hast thou taught thine owne family and by thine owne example wained them from folly O no poor Pilgrim these things have been farre from thee It is for thee rather to confesse how many from the light of the Gospel thou hast brought into ignorance How many thou hast deceived with a pretended zeale How many thou hast brought from the knowledge of the truth by intangling them in errors false opinions strange doctrines O how many have come unto thee to receive instruction from thee or to bee satisfied in some scruple wherin thou mightst have done an office of charity if it had pleased thee whilst thou regardlesse of those wounds of a troubled conscience either applyedst no cure at all unto them or else uncharitably left them intangled in more doubts then thou found'st them And was this the way to teach the ignorant in corrupting rather then correcting the delinquent In perplexing rather then resolving the truly Penitent O my best Master looke downe upon mee with the eye of thy favour I know well I might have brought many unto thee which by my loose life and false doctrine I have drawne from thee O teach me thy Law that I may not onely learne it my selfe but teach others by the patterne of my selfe to love live and delight in it CHAP. 25. Correcting the delinquent AS it is humility first to examine ones selfe so is it charity to correct in an other whatsoever he holds corrigible in himselfe Gods Law is the Glasse which will present to us every blemish that is upon the face of our soule Wherin we are ever charitably to consider and acknowledge too that whatsoever troubles our Brothers eye is but a mote compared to that beame which is in our owne But say unprofitable Pilgrim wherein hast thou done this Second spirituall worke of Meroy to Correct the delinquent Nay rather hast thou not cherished him in his sinnes and told him they were none when as they pierced the clouds and came up with a strong voyce even into the presence of God Hast thou not blessed the wicked in his evill wayes and mov'd him to make a league with his transgressions Yes Lord yes yet not unto all have I done this For some there be whom I have corrected nay censured rather then corrected For my desire was to have their sinnes published to their shame to have their good names taken away to have them houted at in the street which tasted more of detraction then correction For this I did not with the spirit of meeknesse as I was commanded but with the spirit of fury or indignation which brought them to bee rather hardned in sinne then reformed But I must confesse I offended farre oftner in the former then in the latter I meane in humoring sinne either to make me more endeared to them or else for feare lest the very like sinnes should bee found out and reproved in mee by them So as my owne guilt made mee to palliate their sin Deare Lord I know well I have often sinned herein I have stood in feare to reprove the transgressions of others and therefore became I Author of their death because that poyson which by crying against I might have expelled I have not expelled in humoring those which I should have corrected Nay what was more I conceived indignation against all such as reproved me for my vices so as those have I hated whom I ought to have loved and whatsoever distasted or displeased me I desired earnestly that they should not be O forgive me these And make me henceforth such an Enemy to all vices as I may correct my selfe with as impartiall sharpenesse Others with the spirit of compassion and meekenesse CHAP. 26. Counselling the indigent COunsell to the poore and needy is as a receipt unto the sicke in the time of his extremity what availes a Medicine unapplyed Physicke unministred or counsell un-imparted I have known such as were destitute in this kind how with teares in their eyes they importuned my advice and I had it in readinesse but would not minister it because hee was poore and despicable in the eye of the world that besought it And alas was this the cause Hadst thou beene well advised thou wouldst rather have given it because hee was poore and succourlesse that did request it For consider thy owne poore condition hard-hearted Pilgrim and in what case thou standest How thy good and gracious God should hee not looke downe upon thee with the eyes of his mercy and take pitty on thy poverty what might become of thee Into what straits has thy soule beene brought how dry desolate how weake and dis-consolate have bin thy staggring resolves How fainting and heartlesse have beene thy hopes Foes thou hadst without thee feares within thee not the least beamling of comfort shone upon thee Yet for all this thou foundst a faithfull Counsellor to advise thee a gracious Comforter to refresh thee And yet thou quite forgotst all this when thou sawest thy brother in necessity He complained to thee how hee was wronged and it lay in thine hand to redresse it but thou wouldst not be seene in it Thy Counsell at least thou mightst afford it but thou denied him it or which was worse so advised him in it as might rather hinder then further him in the pursuit of it Gracious Lord in whose brest are layd up all the treasures
greedinesse I had committed had sent forth their cry to the clouds they were of no inferior nature but suchas derogated highly from the honour of my Maker What may I then expect but that those Viols of his wrath should be poured forth even to the bottome if hee did not looke upon me with his eye of fatherly compassion It is true my deare Lord it is true No sinner ever exceeded me in number and nature yet comming to thee with an humble contrite heart receive me loving Father for one of thine Though my sinnes might justly make a partition wall betwixt my soule and thee my sweet Spouse for ever yet hast thou promised to be a Saviour to every penitent sinner O Lord looke upon me in thy mercy for my soule is sore vexed within me CHAP. 19. His Contempt of the Third in playing the Wanton IS it time to feast and play the Wanton when the Flood is comming Every houre ushers me to my Grave yet am I still farre off from receiving the motions of Grace Woe is me that my Dalilah has rob'd mee of my strength What a long time of youth did I lead as if that Spring would ne're have done How strongly nay how strangely have I beene taken with a whorish behaviour as if there had beene no well-beseeming beauty but what was accompanied by impudence How often have I taken delight in the count'nance of a strange woman How desirous have I beene to take how ready to bee taken That Belcâ—ne could not open nor in her opening discover the feature of a woman which my wanton eye did not fixe on Forbidden fruit and stolne waters were ever sweetest Lightnesse had got such possession of mee as were it in action or discourse there was nothing which took mine eare more or made the houre lesse tedious I had read how that the Adulterer and Whore-monger God would judge How that the pleasure of fornication was short but the punishment of the Fornicator eternall And sometimes I had the grace to consider with my selfe what thing this Eternity was And the more I begun to consider it the further I was from it yet I found it to bee such a thing as admitted no end and yet I unfortunately made a forfeiture of it for a moments pleasure Pleasure shall I call it no that cannot be properly called a pleasure but a torture which dams the soule for ever I found the deceitfulnesse of this sinne with what resolves I made hourely to become a true and unfeined Penitent never to returne to my vomit I consider'd how a continent soule was the precioust treasure how God would not dwell in that heart that was infected with this sinne All this I applyed to my heart but alas how long did it remaine uncorrupt No sooner was there an occasion of temptation offered then my vaine heart quite forgot what shee had resolved The thought of Eternity was presently choaked with an haplesse desire of enjoying what was lighter then vanity Woe is me that any reasonable soule should bee so deluded That neither the promises of a better life nor the shame of this present life could decline mee from working such iniquity I found how all bread was sweet unto the Adulterer How none was more estranged from his love then whom hee was bound most to love Thus I perished with open eyes for I knew well how the Harlot would bring a man even to a morsell of bread How her paths were full of deceipt and how her foot-stepps led unto death And I understood how there was nothing to be compared to a vertuous Woman and what felicity I enjoyed in such a Choice With what pious Obsequies I solemniz'd her Funeralls whom I once enjoyed with what purposes I entertained to remaine a constant Widdower after such time as I was deprived of her Yet though ripenesse of yeares had nipped in mee the blossoms of of youth nay though age had writ deepe furrows in my brow yet found I youth enough in my doating fancy For I am ashamed to thinke with what an unbeseeming lightnesse I encountred a strange face How soone I could gather by the wandring motion of her eye the disposition of her heart Thus in my declining age begun I to renue my acquaintance with light love and to practise that which did least become me So dangerous is the custome of sinne when it has taken full seazure or possession of the soule O my sweet Iesu clense me from my secret sinnes and give mee grace to remember these things with heavinesse of heart Let me goe all the day mourning and with teares of hearty contrition move thy tender heart to compassion O cuâ—e this bloody issue of my sinne apply unto my bleeding wounds a present cure As thou lookt upon Magdalen and made her an holy Saint of an hainous sinner so looke upon mee with the eye of pitty that I may find thee in the day of my visitation a gracious Saviour CHAP. 20. His breach of the Fourth in his cunning defeating of his Neighbour MY conscience hath oft-times told me and woe is mee that I remembred it not how there were many other kinds of Theft besides purloyning or imbezling of my Neighbours goods In defeating him of what was due unto him nay in finding what I knew to bee his and not restoring it unto him this even this convinc'd my conscience of guilt and that I was a Robber of him These seeme but light sinnes and of such easie digestion as they seeme no sinnes at all But these must not be forgotten for they are writ in his Booke with a pen of steele and are not to be wiped away but with the soft Spunge of his mercy I have often thought out of the foolishnesse of mine heart that privily to take away or defeat any one of small toyes or trifles as I accounted them was no sinne because they were of small or no weight whereas if I had knowne the quality of sinne aright I would have confest that it was not the value of the thing but the intention of the heart that made the sinne It skils not much whether the substance be vile or precious which is unjustly procuted or injuriously required so as the affection bee to either of these equally corrupted Though they be of different dammage in respect of him from whom they are taken yet bring they equall detriment to him by whom they were taken O with what sighes with what teares did that devout Father bewayle his breaking into an Orchard though hee was then a Boy and therefore pardonable These are now so easily dispenc'd with as they are held but tricks of youth But hee could cry forth in the anguish of his spirit I have had a desire to perish O Lord I have had a desire to perish O how the sense of sinne makes the least seeming sinne appeare heavy O what may I thinke of my selfe who have gloried in these things A graine of sand though it
ground where no water is so has shee thirsted after thee And now Lord that I may present my selfe before thee with more humility I will ever set my imperfections before mee remembring what good I have omitted when I had opportunity to doe it againe what evill I have committed when the remembrance of thy mercy might have declin'd me frâ— it Amongst which let me now call to mind those Blessings thy gratious goodnesse ha's pronounced to every faithfull follower and then examin my selfe whether I deserve or no to be listed in that number CHAP. 40. Blessed are the poor in spirit for for theirs is the Kingdome of Heaven HVmility is the Path that leadeth to glory There is no vertue that can subsist without it This may be one reason why the very first Beatitude is grounded on it But what are we to learne from hence Not to be high-minded but of an humble and meeke Spirit In suffering dishonour for the honour of our Saviour In possessing our Soules with patience In mitigating wrath with mildnesse In relinquishing himselfe in preferring others before himselfe In judging well of others but worst of himselfe In wishing unto others as to himselfe In rejoycing in nothing but in the Crosse of Christ yet unfainedly suffering with those who suffer for Christ. Now return and accompt proud Pilgrim whether there appeare any tokens of this poor spirit in thee Hast thou not ever reteined a good opinion of thine owne worthlesse worth Hast thou not beene of a Contentious spirit Hast thou not answered reproach with reproach Hast thou not beene more ready in defending thine owne honour then advancing the honour of thy Saviour Hast thou not beene so farre from possessing thy Soule in patience as thou couldst not endure the least affront without much violence Hast thou with soft words mitigated wrath Nay hast thou never suffered the Sunne to set upon thy wrath Hast thou in an humble contempt of thy selfe preferred others before thy selfe Nay rather hast thou not with the Spirit of contradiction opposed thy judgment against others and out of a foolish presumption made an Idol of thy selfe Hast thou in the Scale of Charity preferred others before thy selfe or rather hast thou not rashly judged others in thine heart and in thy too strict examination of him concluded with that proud Pharisee I am not as this man is In a word hast thou judged well of others but worst of thy selfe or wished unto others as to thy selfe or rejoyced like a faithfull Champion in the Crosse of Christ or like a compassionate Member suffered with those who suffer for Christ O no nothing lesse can I finde in my selfe unhappy Pilgrim I have ever held a poor spirit in contempt and an unsit Companion to take acquaintance of in this World How then deare Saviour may I expect an inheritance in the Kingdome of Heaven who am so farre estranged from a mild Spirit on Earth O my Lord incline thine Eare to my petition Renue a right spirit within mee so shall I be endowed with what delighteth thee by accounting a meek spirit a spirituall beauty and after this life through thy mercy become inheritour of that Kingdome which thou hast prepared for those that love thee CHAP. 41. Blessed are the meeke for they shall possesse the Earth HEre is a promise that the meeke shall possesse the earth and yet is it hard to find a spirit truly meeke upon the Earth By which thou maist gather poor Pilgrim that there is another Earth besides this Earth wee here tread on which shall bee given for a possession to the meeke That desired Earth prepared onely for such who have wained their desires from earth This is a Land which floweth with better things then Milke and Honey An heavenly Havilah where the purest Gold is to be found nay where the very Streetes are Paved with Gold the Walls are of pretious Stones the Gates are made of the best Margarites those many Mansions founded of square stones built of Saphires arched over with golden Bricks which none must enter but he that is cleane none must inhabit that is defiled Where then must thy possession be in this Land of promise what Mansion maist thou expect in this Holy City Woe is mee I am uncleane I am uncleane from head to foot there is nothing in me but boyles sores and runnings How may I then looke there to receive any Mansion seeing to a Cleane Lord is required a cleane Habitation How may I thinke that my Master will looke on mee who all my life time have observed least what hee commanded most practised nothing more then what he prohibited neglected nothing more then what hee commanded How may I expect from his hands a blessing or this promised possession of that earth who never shewed so much as the least meeknesse upon earth Yet did that meeke Lambe who became an offering for me leave such a patterne unto mee that if I were not wholly unmindfull of my soules honour nor wholly forgetfull of the love of such a Master I could not chuse but after his example become his meeke and obedient Follower For his whole life was a Mirror of meeknesse seeing from the Cratch to the Crosse he suffered all things patiently beare all reproaches meekely to reach unto thee from the tree of his Crosse a Crowne of glory O my Redeemer imprint this meeknesse of thine in my memory let it never depart from me put a meeke and mild answer into my mouth when any one shall revile me Let me referre my cause unto thee and that with such Christian Charity as I may sincerely pray for mine Enemy and in meekenesse of spirit to imitate the example of that meeke Lambe who with so resigned a will became a Sacrifice for mee CHAP. 42. Blessed are they that mourne for they shall be comforted THat wise Preacher could say It was better going to the House of mourning then to the house of rejoycing And yet how little did this admonition worke upon thy thoughts How pleasant have those Consorts of death those Brethren in evill seem'd unto thee How merrily the houre went away Nothing was wanting to make your delights more complete but that you wanted time to make your follies more complete Full cups merry Songs prophane Oathes were the onely Actors that presented themselves in this expence of time A long night soone past over but not so easily accounted for But tell me thou misguided Pilgrim were 't thou as quick in thy visits to the house of mourning didst thou labour to comfort the comfortlesse Didst thou mourne with those that mourn'd or with a tender Christian heart suffer with those that suffer'd O no! shall I rather tell thee what thou hast done Thou hast rejoyced when others mourned taken content when others suffered Nay if at any time thou mourned'st it was such as God himselfe was provoked with it For thou either immoderately mourned'st for the losse of thy friend and so
offended'st him with thy excessive mourning or what was worse for the losse of some temporall substance and so provoked him with thy indiscreet sorrowing or which was worse for that thou mightst not enjoy thy full of pleasure and so plunge thy soule downe into the balefull pit of predition for ever Thy desire was to passe time over with a merry heart and to satisfie her in the lusts thereof And yet thou hadst so much divinity in thee as sometimes to consider how none could partake in comfort here and elsewhere How none could be there comforted who was not here afflicted How none could be there solaced unlesse hee here sorrowed How the Almighty had a Sonne without sinne but none without a scourge One who wept often but was never seene to laugh One who from his birth to his death made his life a continued Scene of sorrow One who in the bitternesse of his soule called and cryed to all such as past by him to come unto him to behold him and witnesse with him If ever there were sorrow like unto his sorrow O no my deare Saviour there was never sorrow like unto thy soâ—rrow yet I who occasion'd thy sorrow partake little in thy sorrow O bring mee now to a true sense of my sinne to a true sorrow for my endanger'd soule Let my eyes be so well acquainted with teares as my affection may be estranged from all joyes Let mee become so happy a Mourner as with devout Magdalen I may become an hearty Convert of an hainous sinner and so by ceasing from sinne become a welcome Guest to my Saviour CHAP. 43. Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after righteousnesse for they shall bee satisfied MAny times hast thou hungred oft hast thou thirsted but tell mee was this for righteousnesse No this hunger of thine was rather like the Prodigals in hungring after the huskes of vanity or like Esau's in hungring after delicacie or like Ahabs in hungring after anothers Vineyard greedily or like Hamons in hungring after honour gracelesly And the like was thy thirst Thou thirsted but it was with Gehezay after gold or with those before the Flood after full cups or like Nimrod after blood or like Amnon after lust All this while resolve mee where thine heart is It cannot be lodged in the Sanctuary being so betroathed to vanity Thy delight cannot bee in the Law of the Lord. Thine heart can never endite a good matter so long as thou suffers it to wander from thee like light Thamar after this manner O how farre is this after hungring how to promote Gods glory how farre is this from thirsting after workes of mercy For how soever some of these who dedicate themselves to the devotion of the world upon a more serious remembrance of Gods heavie judgements prepared for every rebellious and impenitent Sinner may sometimes seeme struck with remorse of conscience and heartily wish with Balaam the death of the righteous yet so long as they care not for walking in the wayes of the righteous nor with an humble holy zeale thirst after righteousnesse nor mortifie their desires by the Law of obedience they may bee long time wishers before they bee enjoyers Such desires can never produce good effect which are not seconded with the fruits of a good life Where piety has lost her practise there is small comfort in the Court of Conscience As the faithfull man liveth by faith so must hee live in the life of faith and walke according to the profession of his faith or hee shall never receive the promises of faith Hee who believes whatsoever is necessarily to bee believed and observeth whatsoever is by the divine Law of God commanded that man shall be accepted But what is to bee expected in this wide world this wilde wildernesse where there appeares such want of obedience in youth such want of devotion in age such want of conscience in both And what art thou unhappy Pilgrim who speakest these things but as leaven to make soure the Lumpe Thy life hath corrupted many reclaimed none None more ready to sinne none more slow to sigh for those sinnes which hee hath committed None hungring nor thirsting more after those troubled brooks of vanity and lightnesse none hungring nor thirsting lesse after those precious treasures of Righteousnesse Deare Lord be mercifull unto mee a Sinner I thirst Lord I thirst give mee to drinke of those waters of life for unlesse thou helpe mee and reach them to mee I remaine desolate and hopelesse of reliefe in this time of my necessity Sweet Iesu the well is deepe and I have not wherewith to draw unlesse thou draw mee to thee and bestow on mee what with all humility I begge of thee O increase in mee an holy hunger and constant thirst after righteousnesse that my wayes and workes may bee sanctified throughout in the practise of obedience CHAP. 44. Blessed are the mercifull for they shall obtaine mercy CAnst thou unmercisull Pilgrim looke for mercy at the hand of thy Maker and never so much as open the bowels of thy compassion to thy poore Brother Art thou not in farre deeper areâ—res to him that made thee then hee is unto thee whom thou usest so unmercifully what would become of thee if hee should deale with thee according to his justice and throw thee into that Lake of fire and brimstone where the worme is ever gnawing and never dying fire ever burning and never cooling and death ever living and never ending where woe and sorrow howling and gnashing of teeth is the best melody that raging Tophet can afford Now to avoide a place of such endlesse torment who would not suffer the losse of any temporall estate nay even of life it selfe Yet thou unhappy one wilt not make thee friends of thy worldly Mammon nor in workes of mercy expresse thy selfe a Christian Every where maist thou find subjects fit to exercise thy Charity in every lane in every street thy poore languishing Brother begging reliefe for his sake who suffer'd death for thy sake and yet thou turnest away thy face from him his many ragges and running sores make thee abhorre him Again thou canst not encounter thy Debter but with much distemper though the times be hard his family poore and his necessities great yet conceivest thou no pitty of his distressed estate Thou layes thine executions upon him throwes him into prison where it is the least of thy care what become of him Let him starve for food thou art well contented his poor enâ—eebled corps no sooner lose their breath then thou losest thy debt and art here with well satisfied Againe should any poore way-faring soule repaire to thy house this Cell of thy Pilgrimage and after that ordinâ—ry forme of begging in Italy should beseech thee to doe good for thine owne sake thine answer as it has been ever would be like that churlish Nabals Shall I give my bread and my flesh unto strangers Tell mee then how canst thou looke for the
least drop of mercy who in all thy time hast been a stranger to the Workes of mercy Oh when hee shall demand of thee who gave himselfe for thee where bee those hungry soules which thou hast relieved those thirsty ones whom thou hast refreshed those naked ones whom thou hast cloathed Those harbourlesse Pilgrims whom thou hast harboured those sickly members whom thou hast visited those comfortlesse Captives whom thou hast redeemed those last Obits or Offices which thou to thy dead Brother should'st have performed what Advocate then canst thou find to plead for thee who is hee that will speake a good word for thee to the King that his wrath may be appeased towards thee oh none none Thou art wholly left to thy selfe and utterly lost in thy selfe and even in thine owne bosome shalt find that witnesse to accuse thy selfe as nothing may remaine but the expectance of a terrible and irrevocable sentence O God of mercy deale not with mee according to the measure of my sinnes for they are exceedingly multiplied but according to thy great mercy put away my iniquities that thy name may bee magnified O Lord thou who delightest in mercy and wilt have mercy on those on whom thou wilt have mercy make mee to delight in that wherein thou delightest that in the day of wrath I may find mercy CHAP. 45. Blessed are the cleane in heart for they shall see God CAn the Leopard lay away his spots or the Ethiopian his blacknesse As the Leper in the old Law was commanded to cry out I am uncleane I am uncleane So I a foule sinfull Leper may cry out in the same manner that men may shun me lest they become infected by my behaviour For as the soule is farre more precious then the body so is the Leprosie of sinne farre more dangerous then that of the skinne The Swan if at any time shee pride her selfe in her beauty no sooner lookes upon her blaâ—k feet then she wailes her plumes Miserable Pilgrim Looke at thy blacke feet how they are ever walking in the wayes of sinne Looke at thy blacke hands how they are ever with greedinesse committing sinne Looke at thy black prophane mouth how it is ever belching forth motives to sinne looke at thy blacke projecting braine how it is ever plotting new wayes or passages for sinne Look at thy blacke deceitfull heart how it is ever imagining how to strengthen the arme of sinne Looke at thy black corrupted Lever which proves thee a corrupt Liver how it is infected with sinne Nay looke at every part and every where shalt thou find this spirituall Leprosie raging and raigning spreading and streaming into every veine every joynt or artery And yet what an Idoll thou makest of thy selfe how ready thou art to justifie thy selfe How farre from craving thy good Physicians helpe as thou wilt rather dye then confesse thy want of health Truth is there is no sinne of a more dangerous quality then this spirituall Idolatry for by it whatsoever is in value least is honoured most And againe whatsoever in honour most is valued least Oh hadst thou unmindfull Pilgrim looked so carefully to the clensing of thine inward house as thou hast done to the needlesse trimming of thine outward house hadst thou beene as mindfull of clensing thine heart as thou hast beene of brushing thine habit oh then these leprous spots which now appeare so foulely on thee had never infected thee Then had thy life beene a Lampe unto others then had the affections of thine heart beene pure yea God himselfe had prepared in thee a Tabernacle for himselfe to dwell in a Bed of flowers for him to repose in a Temple for him to be praysed in See then what thou hast lost by losing that beauty which should have delighted him most The sight of God Woe is mee what a losse is this To be deprived and of that eternally in the fruition whereof consists all glory The sight of God! Woe is me that ever I was borne to lose that for which I was borne for which I was re-borne The sight of God! The nourishment of every Angelicall soule This have I lost by not clensing my heart for the cleane in heart shall only see God O clense mee from my secret sinnes O forgive me my strange sinnes O let mee now returne to thee with my whole heart and clense thou mine heart that I may make godlinesse my gaine and with these eyes see thee my God of Sion CHAP. 46. Blessed are the Peace-makers for they shall be called the Children of God I Beseech you that neighbour near me and whose testimony may much availe me speake for me have I since I sojourned amongst you laboured to compose peace or to prevent occasion of Suites Have I performed any office that might tend to peace Oh speake for me be it your charity to speak for me for unlesse your charity doe it sure I am my endeavours have little deserved it O no I see you cannot justly speake one good word to the King for mee For my conversation hath beene otherwise amongst you The spirit of contention and contradiction raigned in me and so farre divided was I from the bond of charity as I delighted in nothing more then nursing enmity Injuries I would beare none nay rather then embrace peace I would make injuries of none Neighbourly arbitrations I neither affected nor admitted it was my counsell ever that suits should bee commenced Let the Law try it though the cause were not worth a see for which we contended Nay to feed this fire of debate with new fuell I told such who repaired to mee for advise damnable advice to lead a deluded Client into the height of all vice that to beare an injury were to make every one their enemy How hee who forgives him that wrongs him encourageth him to picke a new quarrell at him while the remitting of one becomes the admitting of another yea where a wrong is threatned and not revenged it emboldneth the Actor to see it executed Thus lay I a snare privily to catch the simple and innocent doer and by my mischievous counsell to make him of a Lover of peace a common Barreter But evill Counsell is worst for the Counsellor this I find too true to my discomfort For now me thinks all those differences which I raised all those quarrels which I started present themselves before thee threatning nothing less then perdition to me for by the malicious instigation of Sathan they buzze like Bees about me and with strong hand bring mee forth before the face of heaven and earth publikely to accuse me This is hee say they who would be called the Child of God but how can hee have any interest in that title how dares he presume to derive any such promise from God who all his life time has beene a profest Enemy to the peace of God Hee has laboured to encourage Neighbour against Neighbour to bring all things into confusion by his distemper and
cheerefully encounter it and so prepare my selfe for that judgement which shall come after it O make me walke in thy light now while I have light to walke in and to worke out my salvation now while I have time to worke in For time will come unlesse wee walke here as Children of light when we shall have neither light to walke in nor time to worke in O inflame mine heart with thy love and teach me thy judgements and my soule shall live CHAP. 68. Hell HEare how the damned say while they were here on earth they lived better then thou and yet they are damned And so they taxe Gods mercy and indulgence towards thee of injustice and partiality Such is those damned soules charity Meane time thou livest securely feedest deliciously and puttest the thought of the evill day from thee by walking foolishly in the ways of vanity Little desire then maist thou have O thou sinfull Pilgrim to see death having so little hope of life after Death O had some of those damned ones who are now lost for ever received those many sweet visits motions and free offers of his grace those opportunities of doing good those many meanes of eschuing evill no doubt but they would have beene as ready to entertaine them as thou hast been to reject them O thinke with thy selfe how happy had that rich Glutton beene if hee had rewarded poore Lazarus with some few crummes from his Table O had it not beene farre better for him to have given to the poore all that even hee had to have stripped himselfe to his shirt and to have made exchange of his purple raiments with rags of poverty then to fry in hel-fire eternally O how happy had that rich man in the Gospel bin if in stead of inlarging his Barns he had inlarged his Bowels to the poore Little knew hee how soone his soul should be taken from him when hee addressed his care for so needlesse a provision His thoughts were so taken up with inlarging his Barnes as hee never thought How Tophet was ordnined of old how it was made deepe and large the pile thereof fire and much wood and how the breath of the Lord like a streame of brimstone doth kindle it Tophet was large enough though his Barnes were not But turne unto thy selfe for whom canst thou find in more danger of falling into that place of horror then thy selfe How hast thou bestowed thy time how hast thou employed thy Talent O hast thou not put it up in a napkin or done worse by employing it to some worser end have not many bindamned for lesse then thou hast committed and did it repent thee of what thou hadst done that so thou mightst not bee condemned O no many a wretched soule lyes there tormented for lesse offences then ever thou acted and hast thou yet turned to the Lord that thou maist bee pardoned It is written in what houre soever the Righteous committeth iniquity his righteousnesse shall not bee had in remembrance Now if the righteousnesse of him shall bee forgotten by committing iniquity who leaveth what he once loved relinquisheth what hee once professed what may we thinke of the repentance of that sinner who returnes againe to that whereof hee repented O how many have ascended even up to heaven and amongst the starres have built their nests and yet have suddenly falne from that glory by glorying in their own strength and so drench'd themselves in endlesse misery And whence came all this but because they ascended unto that Mountaine to which the first Angel ascended and as a Divell descended And canst thou excuse thy selfe of being one of these Hast thou not sometimes shewn to the world great arguments of piety Hast thou not beene sometimes like the Kings Daughters all glorious without but how soone becamest thou stript of this glory Thou fell from that seeming sanctity or holy hypocrisie into open prophanenesse and impiety Woe is mee what shall become of me The wages of sinne is death a death that never dieth but liveth eternally Where nothing shall bee heard but weeping and wayling groaning and howling sorrowing and gnashing of teeth O how grievous then shall bee mine anguish how endlesse my sorrow and sadnesse when I shall bee set apart from the society of the just deprived of the sight of God deliver'd up unto the power of the Devils and to goe along with them into eternall fire where I am to remaine without end in grieving and groaning when I shall be banished from that blessed Countrey of Paradise to bee tormented in Hell perpetually where I must never see so much as one small beameling of light nor the least drop of refreshment but be tormented in Hell for thousand-thousand years and so tormented as never to be thence delivered wher neither the tormentors become wearied nor they dye who are tormented O my deare Lord looke upon the price of thine owne blood Thou hast bought mee for a great price O deliver thy Darling from the Dags remember her in mercy whom thou hast bought O let her not goe downe into the Pit neither let the Depth swallow her up For who shall praise thee in the Depth O my good God hough the terrors of Death and torments of Hell encompasse me yet art thou my Succour and wilt deliver me and my soule shall live to prayse thee CHAP. 69. Heaven O How should I looke up unto thee that have so provoked thee O thou Mansion of the Saints thou portion of the just thou Citie of the great King thou heavenly and most happy kingdome where thy blessed Inhabitants are ever living never dying wher thy glorious state is ever flourishing and never declining I must confesse to my great griefe and shame that I have no interest in thee I have lost thee unhappily lost thee in losing my selfe in losing my soule by selling it to vanity I sometimes resolved to play the part of a â—ise Merchant and to sell all I had for the purchase of one pearle But I held the purchase too deare and therefore have I deservingly lost it Foolish Pilgrim couldst thou find any thing more fitting to entertaine thy best thoughts or bestow thy care then the salvation of thy soule Didst thou thinke it so easie a taske to get Heaven as to purchase it by making thine Heaven on earth yet hadst thou but taken halfe so much pains to get heaven as thou hast done to get Hell thou mightst have challeng'd more interest to Heaven then now thou canst Many summer days long winter nights have thy follies taken thee up and these seem'd short unto thee because thou tookst delight in those pleasures of vanity But to bestow one short houre upon devotion O how many distractions did that suffer and how long and tedious seem'd that houre because that task was wearisome to thee and thy mind was elsewhere wandring and would not stay with thee and canst thou now thinke that so rich a kingdom
if presented by faith to the Throne of mercy The Enemy can never prevaile where Christian feare and constant hope possesse the Soule Let thy Desire then be planted where thy treasure is placed and as one ravished with a spirituall fervour cry out and spare not with that devout Father Should my Mother pull her haire teare her Clothes lay forth those Brests which nursed mee and in this sort hang about me should my Father lye in the way to stoppe me my Wife and Children weepe about mee I would throw off my Mother neglect my Father contemne the lamentation of my Wife and Children to meet my Saviour Christ Iesus And lesse then this O my soule thou canst not doe if thou callest to mind what thou leavest to whom thou goest and what thou hast in exchange for that thou loosest For what leavest thou here but a world of misery To whom goest thou but to a God of mercy And what hast thou in exchange but immortal glory for a vile fraile and corruptible body whatsoever thou hadst here was got with paine kept with feare and lost with griefe Whereas now thou art to possesse eternall riches without labouring and to enjoy them without feare of losing My heart then is ready my heart is ready too long have I sojourned here in making me a stranger to my heavenly Country It is high time for mee then to discamp and to leave these tents of Kedar that I may rest without labouring rejoyce without sorrowing and live without dying in the Celestiall Thabor Say then with that vessell of Election and thinke as thou sayest I desire to bee dissolved and to be with Christ. Even so Lord In sus come quickly FINIS His Obsequies NOw as yee have seen this poor penitent Pilgrim in Idumâ—a wandring and with the Prodigall Child happily returning so Christian charity assures you that hee is now in Canaan arriving Being after so many tedious dayes and nights of misery translated hence by the irrevocable sentence of mortality Let pious teares and prayers prevaile so farre with you that as yee have taken a full view of the whole progresse of his life so yee would performe a Christian Office in accompanying the solemn accomplishment of his Obsequies after death Draw neare then unto his Sepulcher and in it consider how yee are made of the very selfe same Mould and Matter and must as he has done pay your debt to nature Doe not like that unfruitfull Spectator or formall Mourner who comming amongst others to see his Friend buried and beholding dead mens skuls and bones peece-meale scattered with an easie sigh thence departed But when hee should have gone home to thinke of his last home by meditating of that Memoriall of Death he betooke himselfe to the Taverne to drench and drinke downe those melancholly thoughts in a deepe health Oh thinke from whence yee came and be ashamed Where yee are and be prepared whereto yee goe if unprepar'd and stand amazed from Earth was your beginning on Earth is your Pilgrim being but in Hell without repentance your perpetuall dwelling Dye then to Earth before yee leave Earth that leaving Earth yee may live in heaven the inheritance of the Iust upon Earth His Grave-stone HE whom here this Stone do's cover Whilest hee lived was no other Then a Pilgrim and your Brother But too long the Worlds Lover Would yee know that course of his In an Abstract it was this Long in Idumâ—a living Rich in favour fortune fame Strong in power to shield the same Never losing ever thriving He esteem'd himselfe sole-blest In those treasures he possest Mines and Magazins of gaine Various objects of delight Sported with his appetite Till those Guests hee 'd entertaine Made him to consider well Earth was but the Sinners Cell Pride first rais'd him to a Cedar Avarice made him hug his treasure Envy pin'd him beyond measure Wrath became his passion leader Riotcramm'd him Lust belull'd him Sloath by seazing on him dull'd him Thus environ'd rest of rest Solace Soule society Till Faith Hope and Charity Re-possest him of a Guest Which those Guests he pamper'd so Had before estranged him to Seas thus calm'd stormes appeas'd To discover his content He makes his Will and Testament Which if Christians yee be pleas'd To partake her come with full eyes To solemaize his Obsequies ERRATA No place but is of Errors rife In labours Lectures Leafes Lines life P Ag. 22. line 11. for there read her p. 34. l. 20. f. lives r. houres p. 72. l. 9. for Dames r. Damns p. 112. l. ult r. one to dictate to thee what thou hast c. p. 153. l. 21. f. Nay r. May. p. 166. l. 22. f. Couch r. Touch. Ibid. in marg f. Humb. r. Lumb p 205 l. 13. f. wailes r. vailes p. 213. l 9. f. meditation r. mediation p. 269. l. 16. for Calidore r. Calidon p. 340. for them r him p. 355. 1 â—â— f. when r. where pag. ibl 18. f. Dags r. Dogs p. 356. l. 14. for everting in some copies r. everlasting p. 363 1. 1 f. painting r. â—painting p. 379 mis-folio'd * Cuncta quâ— suntadduâ—etâ— Done in judicium Ecâ—les 12. Reddiâ—uri sumus raâ—ionem de cogitatiâ—nibus nostris Sap 1. De omnibus vâ—râ—is Mâ—t. 12. De oâ—eribus â—osâ—ris 2 Cor. 5. * Signant se omnes signo crucis respondent omnes Amen câ—ntant omnes Alleluia baptizantur oâ—nes ecclesiarum pietates implent nen discernuntursilâ—i Dei â— fliâ—s Diabolinisi in chaâ—itate Vid. Aug. Eccles. 12. 3. Ecclus 10. 8. Psal. 120. 5. Isa. 30. 33. Exod. 15. 23. Prov. 23. 29. 30. Bern. Med. cap. 15. Ib. cap. 3. Bern. Med. câ—p â— We are before all others to bestow Holy dayes in pious works and religious wayes Aug. Sup. Psal. 22. Câ—ril Basal Honail 8. 9. Aug. Mâ—d. 39. â—ern Med. 11. Aug. in Confess Malac 3. 8. 9 Prov. 20. 25. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Bern Med. 17. Bern. Med. 5. Mat. 25. Humb. Sup. reg B. Aug. Aug. Med. 25. Bern. Med. 14. Bern. Med. 11. Athan. Bern Med. 8. Iam. 5. Gen. 7. Bern. Med. 11. Ib. c. 8. Iohn 13. 23. Aug. in Serm. de Ascens Act. â—3 Aug. Aug. Bern. Med. 2. Eccles. 12 12. Sap. 1â— Rom. 2. Ib. 5. 15. Mat. 12. 2 Cor. 5. Esay 30. 33. Ezek. 42 Augs Soliloq c. 29. Bern. Med Dam. de Hora â—ort Bern. Med 3. Psal. 39. 12. Ezek. 18. 1 Iam. 5. Hab. 2. 4. Rom. 3. 28 Mat. 14. 31. Luke 17. 6. v. 5. Luke 22. 32. Act. 5. 9. 1 Thes. 5. 8 Tit 2. 13. Psal. 16. 9. 31. 24. Prov 13 12. 14. 32. Rom. 5. 5. Rom. 12. 12. 15. 13. 8. 24. Rom. 8. 24. 1 Cor. 53. 13. 1 Cor. 8. 1. v. I. a 1 Cor. 16 14. b 14. 1. c Col. 3. 14 d Pet. 4. 8. e 2 Pet. 1. 7 f 1 Cor. 13. 4. g v. 5. h v. 6. i v. 8. Aug. Ib Vide Aug. Psal. 119. 71. v. 28. With shreeks I entired and in â—oyle I lived With griefs gripes groanes am I of life deprived Hier. ad Pamâ—â—â—â— et Ocean de error Orig. 2 Reg. 20. 1 Hieron Hieron Sitiens Sepulchrum repetit ossa Sepultorum respicit suspirans Sepultum deserit quando autem in domum fragilitat is humanae Speculum meditando tenderet in tabernam descenderet ubi totam noctem calicibus indulgendo expenderet Chysol