that these are the Fruits worthy of Repentance these are the Restitutions thou requirest of me and the choicest Victims my love can offer up REFLECT XVIII That she ought to desire of God the Gift of Prayer which is the only means the Soul can make use of to corfirm its wavering Resolutions O God who takest delight in rewarding that servant who has been faithful in a few things supply the indigency of my love out of the abundance of thy goodness Let its shallow streams be swallow'd up in the vast Ocean of thy Divine Charity lose themselves in it and be mixed with it that so it may be always conformable unto thine For I confess my frailty that my Heart is an ungrateful and barren Soil producing nothing but Briers and Thorns unless cultivated by thy Grace Water it therefore O Lord with the Dew of Heaven which gives fruitfulness to the Plants and paints the Flowers which inclines our wills and affects our hearts which after it has produc'd in our Soul Works worthy of Repentance protects them from those scorching beams the flames of our lust and preserves them safe unto the Harvest This is the comfortable hope and earnest desire of thy poor servant that which sustains him in this tedious Pilgrimage whilst he languishes with expectation of the Beatifical Vision But that thy Inspirations may have the desired effect upon my Soul that I may receive them with suitable affections that I may prepare my heart for so great favours which thou art pleas'd to bestow upon it With my eyes and hands lift up to Heaven I will meet these Blessings I will forsake every sin which unfits me for them and do all the good thy Grace shall enable me to perform And that the streams of thy Mercy may never fail me a poor thirsty sinner I will continually encrease them with my Tears that is to say Lord by an hearty repentance and an affectionate grief for having so often offended thee And since Prayer is the Channel by which thou conveyest thy Grace and thy Light into our Souls since it is the most fragrant Incence I can offer up unto thee for obtaining of fresh Mercies teach me to Pray unto thee with Reverence with the Adoration of all my Faculties and with my whole Heart And that I may the more devoutly perform this Duty shew me the Necessity and the Advantage of it take away their surprise which the very name of Prayer is apt to produce in me and shew me that 't is not so difficult so tiresom a Duty as some persons represent it to themselves who are ignorant that as in thy House there are many Mansions so there are different ways of conversing with thee some of which require only the sincerity of our Hearts REELECT XIX What the Nature of Prayer is and how faithful a Penitent Soul ought to be to its Resolutions of constantly performing this Holy Exercise 'T Is true Lord that the Prayer of a Devout Soul who has retir'd himself from the World and is fill'd with the Joys of thy Holy Spirit is like a Box of precious Ointment which as soon as ever it approaches the fire sends forth a fragrant Odour and that the Croans of a poor Creature who lies groveling on the Earth who only crawls on in the path of Vertue are like troubled Waters which must be distil'd drop by drop before they will afford any useful Liquor Nevertheress O my God it seems most reasonable that since Prayer is only a lifting up of our hearts unto thee in which we lay before thee our Wants and beg Supplies I say it seems most reasonable to me that she who is tormoiled with the Affairs of the World who finds her self in a languishing Condition harras'd by a thousand Miseries and surrounded with a thousand Dangers is under a more pressing necessity of Praying to thee than the Religious person who is hedg'd about with thy Mercies It appears highly reasonable to me not only that she is under a greater necessity but also that she is better disposed to perform this Duty of Prayer than one who is more habitually devout because she cannot chuse but do it whether she thinks of it or no For if 't is natural for a poor man to ask an Alms for a sick man to bemoan himself and for one in danger to lift up his eyes towards Heaven How much more natural is it for that Soul to pray unto his God who is continually pressed with these three Calamities who is always poor always sick and always in danger the three chief hinges upon which this Duty turns Therefore that I may delight my self in this Angelick Exercise teach me O my God that Prayer is nothing else but a pleasing converse between the Soul and its Creator a Torch which dispels the darkness of its understanding and a Glass which truly represents all its imperfections An Eloquent Preacher who Imprints the Law of God in our Minds a faithful Guide who conducts us safely through the strait Way of our Salvation a sweet Sleep which gives the Soul repose in the Arms of God's Providence a Holy Joy which renders sinful pleasures nauseous and all senful delights insipid in comparison with those of the Cross A comfortable contemplation of our latter end which tames our Appetites with the thoughts of Death which sweetens his approaches with the Expectation of Eternity and an ardent Desire of the Beatifical Vision Lastly 'T is the Crucifixion of our Passions the Mortification of our Self-love and the Resurrection of the Grace of Jesus Christ in our Souls Prepare therefore the Palate of my Soul O my God that it may relish this delicious Manna for the only way to persevere to the end in thy Commandnients in the midst of a crooked and perverse Generation to slight the World and all its Vanities and to love thee above all things is to converse with thee by Prayer not only as with our Father and our God but as with our most affectionate and familiar Friend I would say Lord the only way to lay before thee all those Passions which tyrannise in our Minds all those terrible Objects which fright us all those Frailties which humble us all those Sorrows which consume us all those Griefs which rend us and to delineate all the confusion of our Minds is to come unto thee as holy David did and lay all our Affictions all the burthen of our Souls and all our Prayers at the Foot-stool of thy Throne For alas if our Self-love takes so much pleasure in relating our Afflictions to our impotent Friends who can do nothing but hear and pity them how much greater comfort should it be that we are encouraged to pour out our Wants before a God who if he pleases can help us who is oftentimes more delighted to see a Soul humbled by its Misery than elated with the Eminent Instances of its Vertue Incline me therefore O my God to spend some moments every day
who believe the Histories of Alexander and Caesar yet question that of Jesus Christ Who consider whether that Faith which was propagated by twelve poor Fishermen and confirm'd by an infinite number of Miracles wrought in the sight of all nations can now reasonably be call'd in question Who consider whether that Army of Martyrs who seal'd this Faith with their Blood are not a sufficient cloud of Witnesses to evince its Truth Who consider whether all those Prophesies in the Old Testament concerning the Coming and Kingdom of the Messiah which have been punctually accomplish'd ought to pass for Fables Who consider those incomprehensible Mysteries the Effects of the Omnipotent Grace of Jesus Christ and his infinite Love towards us his poor Creatures Lastly Who consider all God's wonderful Works upon their Souls that admirable Conduct which at the same enlightneth our Understandings by his Fatherly Corrections and preserves us which by his Divine Providence orders all things for some end best known unto himself and makes every thing tend to the welfare and advantage of his Elect. 'T is for these persons who having the clouds of their Understandings dispell'd by the light of these indubitable truths yet are presently blinded by the vanities of the World 't is for their Good as well as my own I consider That a Soul in this World without Prayer without reflection and without Reliance upon God's Providence is like a Ship in the midst of a Tempest without a Pilot like a Man who fancies himself wonderfully enlightned and yet is blinded with the thinkest Mists of Ignorance and Error He is like that person who fancies he knows God has Faith Hope and Charity and yet adores his Idol-passions he is like a Traveller in a strange Country without either Guide or Compass who the faster he walks the farther he wanders from his Home He is like that person who being tumbled into the bottom of a deep Pit yet will not make use of the Cord which is let down to draw him up Lastly He is like that foolish builder who endeavours to erect a Magnificent Pallace without a Foundation For how can he work out his Salvation who has not God in all his thoughts How can he observe his Laws and obey his Commandments who never thinks on them How can he bridle his Tongue and all his head-strong Passions without the assistance of God's Grace And how can he obtain this Grace who will not be at the pains to ask it How can he avoid falling into Despair who goes on in a sinful course of life which he knows will end in the Damnation of his Soul Who either uses the most preposterous means imaginable to quiet his Conscience that is by putting out of his mind the thoughts of another Life an Eternity and a God or else doth not place his trust in him In fine How can he be a good Christian and love Jesus Christ who does not know him does not consider that he dy'd for us does not meditate on his Life his Actions or his Holy Gospel REFLECT XXIII She desires of God the Gift of Prayer that she may make Death Eternity and God's Judgments the Subject of it which are the proper means to season our Souls with the Fear of God AH Lord since I am convinc'd that Prayer which is nothing but the lifting up of our Souls unto thee our continual endeavour to pluck down the strong-holds of Satan and establish the Kingdom of Jesus Christ is so easie so necessary and so Profitacle a Duty Since I am assured by thy Holy Word and the Examples of Holy Men that 't is a floating plank which will bear up my Soul in all the storms of this life and convey it safe into the blessed Haven of Eternity that is to the Heavenly Jerusalem which is above where all tears shall be wiped away from our eyes and we shall enjoy those pleasures which are at thy right-hand for evermore Give me an earnest Desire and Delight in Praying to thee let it be as pleasant and familiar as ever the Vanities of the World have been for which I have so often hazarded the Salvation of my Soul But since Death is the end of all things and the most profitable Subject of our Meditations Grant O my God that I may daily consider my last end when to speak in the Words of the Holy Scripture my breath goeth forth I return to the earth and in that very day my thoughts perish That Time which will come like a Thief in the Night and seize upon our Souls That Time after which there will be no more space for Repentance That Time for which we ought to be prepared all the days of our life that we may not be surprised thereby That Time on which depends the Happiness or Misery of our Souls to all Eternity O Death how dreadful are thy Approaches to those persons who never thought of thee who placed all their Happiness in the Goods of this World O Death how terrible art thou to those men unto whom thou art the end of their Happiness and the beginning of their Sorrows In short By which they are deprived of all the Enjoyments of this World of that Body which they so much Idoliz'd of a Voluptuous Life and the gratification of their Inordinate Appetites I say How terrible art thou to those who never knew God but only to offend him But then how much more amazing is the Contemplation of Eternity to those men who never pursu'd any other Happiness but what this life affords who never thought of Repentance and forsaking their sins until they were unable to pursue their Lusts and rendred incapable to receive the impressions of any other Passion but Fear O Eternity Eternity how exquisitely Tormenting are the thoughts of thee to that person who beholds Hell ready to receive him for the punishment of their sins who dares not Hope in God's Mercy but would think himself sufficiently happy could he but have the same end with the Beasts that perish And finally O Eternity How dreadful are the thoughts of thee to that person who at his last hour finds that he cannot Love God and yet cannot chuse but Fear him But O blessed Eternity how comfortable art thou to that person who has led a good Life and mortifi'd his Corruptions in this World To a Sinner who is Converted has Repented of his Sins and has a good Foundation of Hope in thy Mercy To him who is accustomed to die daily and has forsaken the World and its Vanities before he is compelled to it by the unalterable Law of Nature In fine to him who sincerely loves God and enjoys in this life the earnest of Eternal Happiness REFLECT XXIV That she will every Day offer up unto God the Sacrifice of Thanksgiving for opening her Eyes and converting her unto himself That she will Write down these Resolutions which she made at the time of her Conversion to the end that she may be always
whence springs all my Misery 't is from this that instead of serving thee in Spirit and in Truth instead of making thy Glory the end of all my thoughts words and actions I persue after nothing but the gratification of my irregular Lusts Let me be never so rash and so ungrateful unto thee O my God as to fancy my self the Author of those Reflections which I somtimes make when I retire my self from the hurry of this world wherein an unquencheable appetite torments the most happy persons and renders them miserable slaves even by the accomplishment of their most earnest desires REFLECT V. The Thoughts of a penitent Soul fearful of being deceiv'd by the Appearance of a False Conversion WHat am I my Lord and my God what am I but a proud Atome a poor blind creature who continually goes astray when thou withholdst the Rays of thy Grace I deserve to be annihilated if at any time I should attempt the conversion of my self by my own power without the assistance of thy Grace Mortifie in my soul all vain glory every thing that tempts me to too good an opinion of my self but chiefly that frothiness of humour which serves only to divert me from thy ways to deprive me of the benefit of my afflictions and the sweet comfort â—f thy Holy Spirit Give me humility and distrust â—f my own reason let me thirst â—fter doing good more and carâ—al knowledge less lest valuing 〈◊〉 more than thy grace I lose my â—elf and instead of becoming a â—ood Christian become a Phiâ—osopher better acquainted â—ith the Maxims of Aristotle and â—escartes than the knowledge â—f the Cross O how vain and deceitful are â—he thoughts of man unless goâ—ern'd by that Wisdom which is â—rom above by that Wisdom â—hich is Foolishness to the World because it is unacquainted â—ith it by that Wisdom which â—od has concealed from the â—roud and discovered to the â—umble by that Wisdom which â—aughs at humane subtilty and â—cts only according to the grace of Jesus Christ In short 〈◊〉 that Wisdom which is producâ—â— by the Fear of God and whiâ—â— is the beginning and the end 〈◊〉 all true Wisdom Permit me not O my God tâ—â— flatter my self that I hate all siâ—â— because I am perhaps restraineâ— from Luxury and passion Leâ— me not flatter my self that 〈◊〉 am taken off from loving thâ— Creature because my diversionâ— are innocent Let me not flatter my self thaâ— I have mortified my passions foâ— I find them revive with moâ—â— strength then ever and encliâ—â— me to self-love which is thâ— more dangerous decause by jâ—â— stifying these irregular motionâ— it renders me deaf to the dictateâ— of my reason and the holy in spirations of thy grace Let me not fancy my self to bâ— without pride ambition selâ—-love because I despise the World â—â—d scorn to owe those Honours â—ortune has stripp'd me of to â—â—ything else but my ovvn deserts Let me not so much deceive my â—â—lf as to think I am throughly â—â—nverted when indeed I have â—â—ly chang'd the sins of sense â—â—r those of the mind A proâ—â—ane proud and fensual Life 〈◊〉 which I was always tormented 〈◊〉 reflecting on my Crimes and â—â—e remorse of my Conscience â—â—r a life in which my whole enâ—eavour is to gratifie self love â—nd enjoy the pleasures of the World and in the mean while â—se my precious time forget my â—od hazard the salvation of my â—oul obtain nothing but the Moâ—ality of a Heathen which alone â—ill not save me at the day of Judgment O state truly deplorable â—nd the more so because I am â—ot sensible of my condition but rest satisfied without endeavouring after any other Repentancâ— or Conversion REFLECT VI. Vpon the Opposition of a Worldlâ— Life to the suffering Life oâ— Jesus Christ TEach me O Lord that thiâ— sort of life is not the life of a Christian and that the end of Christ's Death and Incarnation was not to instate us in so delicate and effeminate a life as might gratifie sense and indulge the flesh and that all Moral Vertues are but dead Works unless enlivened by the Merits and Vertue of Jesus Christ That unless the inclinations of our hearts are changed it will nothing avail a sinner to reform his outward conversation to â—ate the World without love to God to do works of Justice without sincere Repentance and as the Royal Psalmist has it â—o cease from evil without doing good At the same time O Lord that thou destroyest my sinful Habits plant in my soul such Graces as may be fruitful to Good Works Grant that by a lively Faith I may meditate on the Mysteries of thy Life and Passion That my soul may be deeply affected with them and that it may be my greatest pleasure to contemplate those Sufferings which thou didst willingly undergo for my sake That beholding the Divine infant lying on the Straw and in a Manger the Treasures of Heaven vailed in the Poverty of the Earth I may contemn all those Riches which endure but for a moment and endeavour to obtain those incorruptible treasures which Moth and Ruct do not corrupt which will never fly away That the consideration of that private life in which thou wast pleased to disguise thy self from the eyes of the world may create in me a desire to be forgotten by it that I may retire and employ my self only in the great business of my salvation That rhe receiving of thy holy body and precious blood those sacred pledges of thy love which thou wast pleas'd to leave us when thou gavest thy life for our offences may produce in me a holy horrour at the consideration of the cause of thy Death and a detestation of all sin That I may rejoice and be exceeding glad when I shall be disgrac'd and contemned remembring my Saviour's humility who was set at nought by Herod and the Court where he never appear'd but once and then on purpose to be despised That those Scourges which rent thy Sacred Body those Thorns which pierced thy Precious Head may penetrate my callous heart render me truly penitent and willing for the love of thee to undergo all those rigours of Mortification and Self-denial which are requisite for the subduing of our Lusts In fine that the consideration of thy ignominious death on the Cross on which thou perfectest the work of my salvation in grief and misery may be my only hope REFLECT VII What the Hope of a Penitent Soul ought to be THis is the second Favour I desire of thee for the Merits of that precious Blood which trickled from thy Sacred Wounds and which thou didst offer to thy Eternal Father for the price of my Redemption That thou wouldst be pleas'd to give me a true hope in thy Mercies I say Lord a true hope because there is nothing more common than to abuse thy Mercy by making it an incouragement to sin more securely than for sinners to hope in thy goodness without so much as endeavouring
to repent and to go on in their sins with confidence of impunity tho' hereby they make God unjust and rather the refuge and confident of their Crimes than the true Protector of Innocence and Vertue Now whilst thy Thunder has awakned me and thy Rod corrected me Now whilst I am sensible of the wickedness of my Life the dangerous condition of my Soul and am convinc'd that there is a Heaven a Hell and an Eternity Now whilst I am sensible that those things which hitherto inchanted me were but lying Vanities whilst I am inflamed more than ever with an ardent desire of being sincerely converted unto thee Teach me O Lord that as thou art a God full of Mercy and Compassion to those sinners who hope in thy Mercy and return unto thee with all their heart so thou art a terrible God to those who presume on it only that they may multiply their offences and after having tasted the sweet comforts of the Holy Spirit scorn and neglect it For it is not Lord of those miserable wretches that thou sayest to those that knock it shall be opened Is it not of these Miscreants of whom thou hast pronounc'd that thou wilt withdraw the Bowels of thy Mercy Is it not against these impious persons thou hast threatned that thou wilt mock at their Calamity and that instead of finding at their last hour the compassion of a tender Father they shall experience the Justice and Vengeance of an angry God REFLECT VIII What Eeffect a true Repentance ought to have upon our Conversations and what kind of Guide she ought to enquire after for the conduct of her Soul THat I may avoid all the flatteries of Self-love by which the Devil takes occasion to rob me of thy grace Grant O my God that instead of searching into my corruption for palliating Remedies to skin over my Sores I may place my felf at the Tribunal of thy Justice and there apply those Causticks which are necessary to consume Gangrene and Rottenness of my Soul That is to say Lord permit me not to be deceived or rather let me not take pleasure in deceiving my self in fancying that I shall make amends for such a Heathenish life as mine has been such criminal and scandalous passions whilst I continue in the same sinful Habits the same Opportunities the same Pleasures and perhaps the same Crimes too Let me not add this to the heap of my sins to wit the disbelief of thy Gospel the interpreting it according to my fancy or adapting it to countenance my Enormities Ah Lord how do I dishonour thee by my works whilst I praise thee with my mouth whilst I boast that I am a Christian I act contrary to thy holy Law and every day renounce those Vows I made unto thee in my Baptism Ah Lord who punishest my ingratitude by suffering me to fall from one Precipice to another from a neglect of thy Grace to errour and hardness of heart Permit me not to pitch upon a Mountebank instead of an able Physician who can apply proper Remedies to the inveterate Maladies of my Soul I would say Lord let me find a learned prudent and pious Guide who can inform my Judgment and understands when to Absolve me and not a blind or a deceitful Guide who corrupts thy Holy Word bends the Rule to my lusts rather than conforms me to it and endeavours more to please than save me who by a too speedy administration of absolution lulls me into a false peace becomes the partner of my sin the cause of my Damnation and an instrument of the Devil rather than the servant of Jesus Christ For O Lord in that day when all the secrets of our hearts and all the evasions of self-love shall be laid open thou wilt not then judge me by the Maxims of my ghostly Guide but by thy holy Gospel and that light which thou hast given me which I have so often rejected not willing to have the darkness of my mind dispell'd by it Thou wilt judge me by those truths which notwithstanding my corruptions have pierced to the bottom of my Soul by that remorse which thou didst mingle with my most criminal pleasures thereby to recall my heart but alas I always stifled them that I might the more freely abandon my self to my passions those lying Vanities And lastly O my God 't is by the Book of my own Conscience and not that of my ghostly Guide by which thou my Sovereign Judge wilt pronounce my Sentence at that terrible day when thou wilt declare my â—ternal Doom REFLECT IX â—he prays that out of his Mercy he would be pleas'd to direct her continually in the straight Way which leads unto him and not permit her ro flatter her self that she has repented when she is running on still in the broad way AH Lord since I have no way left to appease my Judge and to avoid the Sentence of Death but to juge my self Grant that I may examin my self before the Tribunal of thy Justice Grant that by a sincere repentance and a hearty sorrow for my sins I may appease thy Vengeance and suffer me not so to deceive my self in my repentance and thereby oblige thee to judge me a second time punish me in the day of thy fiery indignation O Lord inflame my heart with that spark of thy grace which remains in my soul and which sometimes makes it sigh within it self change my pleasures into bitterness my prosperity into affliction that I may thereby be assur'd thou hast chang'd thy hatred into love and that I may not find in my sinful estate a more deadly tranquillity than in misery it self What can be more fatal to us than to be deceiv'd in our Conversion and in those Maxims of corrupted Morality which ruin more than Debauchery it self For what more dangerous sickness can there be than that which makes us refuse all Remedies In fine what more destructive than a Reformation in appearance only which entices us out of the straight Way of Eternal Life into the broad Rode of Sin Lord once again I beseech thee chasten me not in thy displeasure as thou dost those Reprobates whom thou punishest with prosperity because they would not partake of thy holy sufferings Remember O my God that I am but dust and ashes a fitter object of thy compassion than thy fury Have mercy upon me O Lord have mercy upon me let thy mercy be proportionate to the hainousness of my offences and thy infinite Loving-kindness which has no other object no other bounds but thy mercy alone In fine give me a Pardon which may blot out all my offences render me worthy of the mercy of God REFLECT X. Motives of Trust in God and Distrust of our selves Jesus Christ alone can confirm our Faith and strengthen our Hope COrrect me O Lord but in mercy considering my frailty and the byas of my corrupt nature which inclines me unto sin and rivets my affections to the things of
her Duty to resist whatsoever is contrary to the Commands of Jesus Christ 57 REFLECT XVI That she should associate her self with those persons who truly fear God and that she ought not to entangle her self again in those things which the World calls State Riches Fortune and Grandeur 63 REFLECT XVII That Charity to wards our Neighbour obliges us carefully to avoid not only every Action which may be injurious to his Life Goods and Reputation but also detracting Speeches and foolish jesting 69 REFLECT XVIII That she ought to desire of God the Gift of Prayer which is the only means the Soul can make use of to confirm its wavering Resolutions 74 REFLECT XIX What the Nature of Prayer is and how faithful a Penitent Soul ought to be to its Resolutions of constantly performing this Holy Exercise 78 REFLECT XX. That the Misery to which Sin has reduc'd us ought to be the Subject of our Prayers and that 't is good to begin them with the Considerations of the stupendious Mystery of our Saviour's Passion 84 REFLECT XXI That we ought not to be weary of Praying because we do not find present Comfort but that we should be faithful to our Resolutions and have recourse to this Holy Exercise when we are wrack'd by the greatest pains and distress'd by the severest Afflictions 87 REFLECT XXII The in dispensable Necessity of Prayer without which 't is impossible to have any serious thoughts of our Salvation 93 REFLECT XXIII She desires of God the Gift of Prayer that she may make Death Eternity and God's Judgments the Subject of it which are the proper means to season our Souls with the Fear of God 99 REFLECT XXIV That she will every Day offer up unto God the Sacrifice of Thanksgiving for opening her Eyes and converting her unto himself That she will Write down these Resolutions which she made at the time of her Conversion to the end that she may be always mindful of these Obligations she has laid upon her self and by which she must be Judg'd at the Last Day 105 AN Advertisement IT was the saying of a Father of the Church That 't is more easie to find out a Man that has preserv'd his Innocency from his Baptism than a sincere and hearty Penitent Because few are Converted as they ought to be Nevertheless God out of his infinite Goodness and Compassion does from time to time turn the Hearts of some Prodigious Sinners demonstrating to the World that he is truly a God of Mercy and that there is no Man who has been never so desperately Wicked but he will receive him if he returns with a heart truly sensible of his Offences He does not desire the Death of a Sinner for he came to lay down his Life for such but only that they would be Converted and live Now if the whole Church stood amaz'd at the Conversion of a Prince whose Devotion was not surpass'd by the austerest Votaries of the times he liv'd in We have no less reason to admire this of a Lady whom the Mercy of God singled out from a debauch'd Age the affluence of all sinful Pleasures to be a Miracle of Penitence For it will be easie to judge by these Pious Reflections which are now made Publick and were Composed after her Retirement from the World and Recovery from a dangerous fit of Sickness that her Soul was deeply affected with a Divine Love and that by how much the more earnest she was in the persuit of sinful Pleasures and forgetful of her Eternal Welfare by so much the more she is at present inspired with the Love of God and desires Life it self for no other purpose than to get an Interest in her Saviours Merits and to blot out the Infamy of her former Life by a sincere Repentance Her Name is concealed out of respect to her Modesty and Humility which would never have permitted these Papers to have been Printed had they not been convey'd away by a vertuous Lady who esteem'd it a great piece of Injustice to with-hold so profitable an Help from those poor Souls who are desirous to Reform their Lives and bid Adieu to their Vicious Conversations For tho' several Books have been writ on this Subject yet she look'd upon this as the best Model'd and Pen'd with the most Divine and Moving Expressions that ever she saw God grant that they who Read these Lines may be Inspired with the same Thoughts this Devout Soul was That those 〈◊〉 have been guilty of th◠same Sins may imitate her Repentance and Husband that Time which the Mercy of God has prolonged to them in considering what will conduce to the advantage of their Immortal Souls REFLECTIONS ON THE Mercy of GOD In Form of Prayers REFLECTION I. Vpon our Obligations to Consecrate that Life to Gods Glory which we hold from his Mercy and the Care you ought to take lest we should be Insnar'd into sin WHat shall I render unto my God for giving me Life and Health for Reprieving me from the Gates of Hell and preserving my Soul and in short for all those Favours which he has vouchsafed to me his poor Servant Shall it suffice O my God to acknowledge thy Benefits will it be any recompence to employ the remainder of that time in thy service which hitherto has been spent in affronting thy Majesty or will the divorcing those unlawful Pleasures to which I have been formerly wedded satisfie thy Justice and blot out my Transgressions In short will it be sufficient to secure me from Eternal Misery that henceforward I will aspire after nothing but Eternal Happiness the fruition of thy self and those ravishing Pleasures which are at thy right-hand for evermore Grant that thy Rays may enlighten my Reason and that thy Grace may penetrate my Soul help me out of that deplorable estate into which I am fallen and inspire me with Faith to pray unto thee and good God suffer me not to fall into such a Lethargy as may render me unmindful of my Souls health or sleep the sleep of Eternal Death Oh let me never forget that dreadful hour when thou cald'st me to an account for my sins when I beheld Death ready to seize upon my soul and carry it into everlasting torments and let thy infinite compassion be deeply engraven upon my memory which in the midst of Judgment did remember Mercy and rescue me from thy fiery indignation Oh that the Joy which fills my Soul for the return of my Health may not Justle out thy Grace and Reconcile me to the World that those vain Ideas of Sensua◠Pleasure may be quite ras'd ou◠of my fancy and neverre-assum◠the place of those solid Truths which by thy Mercy are writte◠there REFLECT II. She Prays unto God to strengthen her Resolutions and to enable her to approach unto him with a pure heart REstore unto me O my God the health of my Soul and enable me to desire of thee above all things that Holy Joy which the
this World Have compassion on my indigence and inconstancy which divert me from any thing that is good and maugre the light of Faith render tll my good Works abortive O God who lovest us more than we can love our selves and who out of thy infinite goodness hast rescued me from a false hope by which I should have been flattered into final impenitence and thus hast sav'd me contrary to my own inclination Give me a solid hope in thy Divine Merits let me consider them as the only Object of my Trust and principally when the Devil tempts me to dispair and employs all his artifices by the interposition of my sins and frailties to eclipse the contemplation of thy Merits In this day of my affliction and distress O my God fix my eyes upon my blessed Saviour dying on the Cross for my sins and miserably torn by those furrows which the Scourges made upon his back Let me consider that thou didst endure all this to obtain pardon for my sins and to encourage me to the taking up of thy Cross upon which depends all my hopes of Salvation Let me contemplate in thy Sacred Wounds the right I a notorious sinner have to hope in thy Mercies Let the hope of a blessed Eternity and the immutability of thy Promises take off my Meditations from the vain and fleeting Enjoyments of this World which hinder my Soul from aspiring to Eternal Felicity For thou knowest O Lord how little stability there is in my best Desires and how speedily the impressions of thy Grace on my heart are defac'd by the vain Idea's of worldly pleasure How the hopes of some trifle some vain lust puffs up my Soul how the Honours and Applause of this World makes me giddy and drunk with the fumes of Vain-glory In fine Lord thou knowest much better than I my self how pliable I am to receive any impression of evil how averse to any â—hing which is good and how unstable in the ways of thy Commandments This is the reason O Lord â—hat I put no confidence in my self that my heart converts it self to thee in all its wants and â—n the day of adversity To thee O Lord who enlightenest the darkest recesses of my mind who possessest me with patience under the severest afflictions and art the Anchor of my Soul Here is Lord my Merit my Riches and my Refuge when the consideration of my wicked life terrifies me Here is Lord my comfort in this vale of Tears and Spiritual Warfare wherein my Soul is made the Scene of all sorts of passions In fine This makes me hope more than fear and rely on thy Mercies rather than dread of thy Justice Ah Lord since I know by experience that thou art a sure Help to those that trust in thee Teach me to relie upon thee in my greatest Extremities to rejoyce in thy Chastisements and to look upon them as marks of thy favour Assist me patiently to undergo them and assure me that thou wilt lay upon me no more than I am able to bear but wilt take thy Rod from me when it shall be conveucent for the health of my Soul Let me be fully assur'd that thy Grace will in thy good time remove all Obstacles which obstruct my Salvation that my Sufferings and the malice of my Enemies will have an end but that thy Mercies endure for ever that after I have fought the good fight here on Earth I shall receive a Crown of â—lory in Heaven for thou maâ—est the Rays of thy Grace to â—hine upon the just and the unâ—ust which at the same time â—elt down the humbe Soul into 〈◊〉 sincere repentance and harden â—he habitual and obdurate sinâ—er to the end that the one â—hould not be tempted to Presume or the other to Dispair â—ut all remain in a continual dependence upon thy Grace Let me not then O my God be in the number of those who will be astonished and confounded at the Great Day because they have rejected thy Grace for I cast my self wholly upon thy Mercy which is infinite and knows no bounds without any reserve or confidence in my own merits But O Lord because Faith and Hope and all other Vertues will avail me nothing without Charity because tho' I could remove Mountains and work all sorts of Miracles yet my works would be dead and sinful unless season'd by thy Love Give me therefore in the third place that Charity which is the Crown of all other Vertues and the Soul of our Good Works I would say Lord Give me a fervent and a faithful Love to thee whereby I shall easily overcome all seeming impossibilities and satisfie the thirst of my panting Soul after a sincere Conversion unto thee REFLECT XI She Prays to God for a New Heart inflam'd with his Love FOr a Foundation of that Miraculous Work which one very truly calls the chiefest Work of thy Grace Create in me O my God a New Heart a humble yet an resolute steady and couragious heart estranged from the World and its Vanities and in short a true Christian heart which may possess me with the love of thee enable me to expose my Life and Fortunes for the Confession of thy Name and render me Obedient to the Foolishness of the Cross in the midst of a crooked and perverse Generation amongst whom it is esteem'd a scandal to be Religious A heart which will love thee in the midst of the severest Tryals resisting the Concupiscence of the Flesh mortifying its corrupt Appetites and irregular Desires A heart which will love thee when I am call'd upon to evidence that love by loving my Enemies and returning them Good for Evil. A heart which for the love of thee will deny it self when there is any competition between the Creature and the Creatour which will silence all the importunities of Nature that it may become more obedient to the voice of thy Grace A heart which will love thee when it must suffer for it and will be content I should sacrifice my reputation and honour to thy Glory in imitation of thy humble Life and opprobrious Death upon the Cross A heart which for the love of thee will relinquish the favour of the Court prefer thy Service before the Splendour of my Family or whatsoever is most dear to me demonstrating hereby that my love to thee surpasses that of the World Lastly Grant O my God that 〈◊〉 may love thee not only for thy benefits when thou blessest me with prosperity and the abundance of good things in this World but also when I am in disgrace poverty or any other Affliction Learn me then to submit to the dispensations of thy Providence and become more conformable to thy Divine Will For O Lord what testimonies can I give thee of my love which will in the least answer thy love to me nay which are not infinitely surpass'd by those favours thou hast been pleased to confer upon me REFLECT XII If the Soul finds any thing in thâ—