more to abhor the bloud of man wherein his life consisteth Deliuer mee O God from the guilt of that bloud which I haue spilt by the 〈◊〉 of Captaine 〈◊〉 and so many Souldiers vnder his commaund from the punishment of that sinne threatned by Nathan that bloud should not depart from my house and finally from future bloud that I may neuer embrew my hands in bloud hereafter The teares of those widdowes whose husbands were slaine in that disastrous assault made at Rabbah the cryes of those children whose Fathers then lost their liues haue mounted vp to 〈◊〉 do frame my Enditement and make my Processe against me before thy Tribunall and doe call instantly for iudgement according to the iust law of Retaliation He that sheddeth mans bloud his bloud shall be shed Wherefore that I may the sooner obtaine my pardon in such latitude as I desire it I doe re-enforce my prayer with all manner of zeale and earnestnesse Deliuer me O God thou that art the God of my saluation I double thy Name when I tender this single supplication hoping by my affectionate insinuation and vehement compellation to draw thy gracious compassion towards me I take hold of thee as it were with both my hands I cry incessantly for pardon of this sin which cries so eagerly in thine eares for vengeance against me Thou God of my saluation I said elsewhere that saluation is the Lords because it can flow from no other fountaine but here I desire to apply it particularly to draw the water to mine owne Mill and to appropriate it as it were wholly to my selfe Thou art of that gracious nature as wee cannot better please thee then by challenging a speciall interest in thy loue by assuring our selues that thou art ours so that howsoeuer our premisses be generall for remission of sins our conclusion must be speciall proper and peculiar Thou art my God and the God of my saluation I will sing ioyfully or aloud of thy Righteousnesse The satisfaction should be answerable to the trespasse done and the retribution to the benefit receiued in some proportion As to a greater sinne a deeper repentance is due so for a more bountiful fauor a larger returne of thankefulnesse is of congruence required I haue grieued beyond measure for my bloody sinne for the inestimable benefit of my free pardon I know not what to render againe In briefe I can returne nothing but praises and thankes a poore requitall for so rich a mercy But sithence I can yeeld no better no other it is meete I should improoue this and set it forth to the vtmost aduantage Wherefore I will sing ioyfully with a liuely spirit with a cheerefull heart I will sing vocalissimè Alleluia My tongue shall become a Trumpet of thy praises which shall sound them out lustily and loudly I will bestow all my breath and strength in proclayming thine honour I will become a chiefe Chanter I will eleuate the note in the highest straine I will so chant out thy praises as thou shalt take notice of it abundantly and so as the noyse may be heard not only in my priuate Chappell or Oratory but in the chiefe Cathedrall Churches in the greatest congregations on Earth yea euen in the blessed Synode of Angels and Saints in heauen Nay I will not onely sing my selfe but I will call in others also to make vp a full Quire O come 〈◊〉 vs sing loudely let vs 〈◊〉 reioyce c. Thy righteousnesse that is Thy faithfulnes and truth in accomplishment of thy gracious promises to such as truly and sincerely repent and humbly hopefully craue pardon for their sinnes for true iustice doth much consist in the due performance of promises Thou thy selfe hast made thy selfe our debtor not by receiuing from vs. but by promising to vs. No man can say vnto thee Render Lord what thou hast receiued but euery man may and must say Performe O Lord what thou hast promised All thy waies are mercy and truth Mercy whereby thou forgiuest sinners and Truth whereby thou makest good thy promises O then how happy are the people whose God is the Lord who by his 〈◊〉 promise is become their faithfull debtor and whose iustice giues assurance of his mercy whose mercy and truth are met together and whose righteousnesse and peace haue kissed each other So as by a reuerent confidence and a holy kinde of boldnesse I may 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 thee in this 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 by the worth of 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 but by 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 of thy promise not to lay my sinnes to my charge bee they neuer so many neuer so great I may pleade my interest in the death of my Sauiour and in thy faithfull promise and free pardon to this effect O my God thou that art the God of my saluation it is agreeable to diuine and humane iustice to keepe promise to performe couenant In the new and sacred couenant it is the Article of Inprimis as they say that thou wilt forgiue the sinnes of thy people remember their iniquities no more Make good then thy word and full agreement really and effectually It stands not with thy iustice to exact twice one and the same debt of mee My suerty and elder Brother Christ Iesus hath paied the debt which I owed hath suffered the punishment which I deserued wherefore enter not into iudgement with thy vnworthy seruant O Lord but for the 〈◊〉 of his death and passion accepted by thee with free consent for full satisfaction let me be acquited and discharged of all my transgressions whatsoeuer I will rely and repose my selfe securely vpon thy word and promise because thou hast ratified and confirmed it with an oath with a solemne oath Thou hast sworne by thy selfe because there is no greater to sweare by by thy 〈◊〉 the Lord Iehouah sware vnto Dauid Truth that is a true oath a faithful promise or Truth that is God sware vnto Dauid He will not turne away the face of his Anoynted his seed shall indure for euer thou hast sworne by thy life I will not the death of a sinner if he repent he shall liue Oh happy people for whose cause thou vouchsafest to sweare Oh most miserable wretches if we beleeue thee not when thou swearest Thy word O Lord is an 〈◊〉 in it selfe and of it selfe so faithfull thou art but to giue vs full 〈◊〉 thou dost condescend to our capacity and infirmity thou makest assurance to men after the manner of men with whom a promise clothed with an oath seemes of greater strength and validity then a bare and naked word and therefore out of abundance of thy loue dost vse a protestation or adiuration otherwise needlesse to remooue out of our incredulous hearts all distrust and colour of dubitation 15 Open thou my lips O Lord and c. BVt I haue beene too forward now I thinke of it to engage my selfe so deepely to sing ioyfully and sound loudly thy righteousnesse I confesse I haue promised more
whom shall I addresse my selfe Hell will not the earth cannot relieue me and I dare not lift vp mine eyes to Heauen hauing so highly offended against Heauen and before thee the great King of Heauen I am assailed on euery side assailed by mine own iniquities assailed by thy graces Where may I shrowd my selfe from my sinnes How can I hide mee from my selfe Where may I expect succour Whence may I hope for helpe sithence thy graces which I haue turned into wantonnesse doe conuince me of foule ingratitude doe multiply iniquities vpon me and euen arme thy mercies against me The extremity of my Condition is such as will afford no long time of deliberation In briefe there is one onely way left of escape and euasion and that is by flying from thee to fly to thee to appeale from thy seate of Iustice to thy throne of Mercy as to thy Court of last resort which is alwaies open Either that way or no way can I be rescued from vtter destruction The most odious sinne of desperation wil but plunge me further into the depth of damnation But with the Lord there is maruailous mercy and plenteous redemption By this meanes it is possible without it impossible to saue my sinfull soule Wherefore my resolution is in the lowest degree of humiliation in the deepest straine of contrition faithfully and yet in a sort fearefully to repose my selfe vpon his infinite and vnspeakeable compassion I will pierce mine entralles and pricke the heart of my corrupt heart to the quicke I will let out a flood of teares which are the bloud of my soule I will mingle my zealous and humble prayers with those salt and brackish teares I will knocke hard at his mercy gate and cry aloud Miserere A MEDITATION VPON THE PSALME of Mercy 1. Haue mercy vpon me O God according to thy great mercy and according to the multitude of thy tender compassions blot out my transgressions THAT which I begge at thy hands O God is mercy for of many properties in thee which are all essentiall to thee there is none so vsefull none so delightfull to my perplexed soule as is thy mercy Were it not for thy Mercy thy Maiesty would affright thy Wisedome confound thy Iustice condemne and thy Power destroy me as on the other part through the sweete mixture of thy Mercy thy Maiestie will reuiue thy Wisedome enlighten thy Iustice acquit thy Power preserue me and euery of thy other Attributes will contribute to the aduancement of my inestimable benefit and endlesse good In Mercy all my prayers and petitions are comprized by Mercy all my defects and desires are satisfied for Mercy all my prayses and thankes are returned Euery thing that hath being doth naturally affect continuance and well being Euery Man doth or should desire his chiefe good and true happinesse which consists in thy remission of his sinnes in his reconciliation to thee and that is the blessed and kindely fruite of thy gracious and tender mercy alone A sinner I am and who is not Therefore I cannot seeke for happines in freedome from sinne that is aboue the nature of man but in the free pardon of my sinne by grace which surmounts all the sinnes of all the world Thou didst looke downe O Lord from all eternity out of thy highest throne of Heauen by way of Suruey among the sonnes of men in all ages and generations all things and persons being euer present vnto thee to see if there were any that would vnderstand and seeke after thee But vpon exact enquiry returne was made they were all found corrupt and abominable There was not one that did good no not one Which for greater vehemency and euidence of the truth is repeated the second tyme and purposely recorded by an infinite foresight to take away all colour of doubt and to impose perpetuall Silence to such as afterwards might deceiue themselues and abuse others with an opinion of their owne iustice and holinesse as answerable to thy diuine law and meritorious of thy louing fauour Wherfore I present this lamentable supplication and sing this dolefull ditty though framed for my selfe 〈◊〉 yet fitting euery of the sonnes of Adam generally Haue Mercy vpon mee O God I call vpon thee O God at this time by the name of Elohim which purports the Trinity of Persons and not of Iehouah which denotes the Vnity of substance in the Godhead for my threefold sinne doth iustly occasion mee to fixe mine eyes vpon the Three persons distinctly Vpon thee O Father who art power against whom I haue offended by abuse of my regall Power in murdering Captaine Vriah and his whole troope Vpon thee O Sonne who art Wisedome by vsing finenesse and fraud in carrying closely and cunningly contriuing the murder Vpon thee O holy Ghost who art goodnesse whom I haue grieued by defiling my hands with blood and body with 〈◊〉 which is or should be thy temple and habitation When I implore thy great Mercie I imply my great misery The Phisick of the body must be attempered to the malady If the receipt be giuen vnder the due Dosis it may moue but it will not remoue the peccant humors Desperate diseases must haue soueraigne 〈◊〉 for meane medicines will neuer cure great griefes If the plaster bee too skant for the sore If the wound be not throughly teinted and wholy couered it will neuer bee well cured or soundly recouered As it is in the diseases and sores of he body so is it also in 〈◊〉 of the soule One deepe 〈◊〉 another the depth of sinne requires the depth of grace and a depth of misery calleth for a depth of mercy If I aske my selfe why is thy Mercy great for that there is no cause of thy mercy but thy Mercy I must answere by the effect Because thou canst 〈◊〉 my soule from the nethermost hell from such anguish of body from such perplexity of spirit from such terrors and torments as are ready to ouerwhelme mee in the pit of destruction If I aske how great is thy Mercy I must giue an answere answerelesse I know it to be meruailous great but how great it is I cannot comprehend The immensity of it I haue assayed to shadow out by such resemblances as the world affords to outward sence for the shallow conceits and weake capacities of mortall men being not able with my thoughts to reach much lesse with my tongue or penne to expresse it The height of thy mercy I 〈◊〉 to the altitude of the Heauen aboue the Earth the bredth to the distance of the East from the West the depth to the affection of parents to their children butalas these are no euen matches for that which is limited and finite hath no proportion at all with that which is vnlimited and infinite Thy Mercy O Lord is as thou art thou art great without quantity as thou art good without quality Thou art not merciful but mercy not good but goodnesse not louing but
the house of thy habitation I euen I that lost my way in my pilgrimage and fell among theeues who robbed me of my garment of godlinesse of my 〈◊〉 of righteousnesse of my girdle of gladnesse and wounded mee with bitter Arrowes and 〈◊〉 darts almost to death I I say being reduced into the way againe refreshed and comforted raysed and set on horsebacke as it were will teach others carefully to kepe themselues in the right way to shunne idlenesse and security and all other occasions of sinne to auoyde such inconueniences as by wofull experience I haue found and felt with intolerable griefe I will teach Transgressors by instruction and 〈◊〉 will teach them by example also Men are more effectually perswaded by the workes they see then by the words they heare by Princes acts then by their Edicts I will ioyne both precept and practice together my words shall bee working words and my deeds shal be speaking deeds Nay I will not only teach them by my words and by my deedes but by my writings also I will cause my Psalmes the webs which my restlesse soule hath wouen to be sung in Gods Tabernacle while I liue when I die bequeath them to God his Church to be vsed in all succeeding ages which I hope will bee of some force to mollifie and qualifie the hard and stony hearts of retchlesse and impenitent sinners I will vse all the wayes I can to teach sinners in thy wayes and I will endeauour to reclaime all sorts of sinners from their euill wayes As there bee seuerall sorts and degrees of transgressors so I will apply my counsailes and admonitions in seuerall kindes respectiuely I will teach sinners of infirmity that they yeeld not at all to the assaults and allurements of sinne that they fight couragiously in that neuer-dying combate betweene the flesh and the Spirit that in no wise they suffer themselues to be carried away Captiues to sinne that they let not sinne raigne howsoeuer it will remaine in their mortall bodies I can and will tell them out of knowledge and experience that if they giue the water passage but a little they shall not bee able to withstand the Current of their owne concupiscence that a little sparke of a wanton looke vpon Bathsheba bred such a huge flame of lust in mee as I could not quench That Satan is subtile and will cunningly insinuate himselfe euery way hee will seeke to make the breach where thy fortification is weakest hee will vndermine if hee cannot batter thy strongest castle if he see where thou mynest he will countermine That he makes semblance sometimes to strike at one place when he intends to hit another that now and then he faignes to make a retraite when he returnes suddenly againe to finde thee the more vnprouided That he is like those Pyrates which alwaies carry in their shippes flags of peace when they intend nothing but warre that when they hold out those flagges their enemies may hold them for friends and so become their prisoners and that therefore it behoueth them to watch continually and carefully to keepe Centinell ouer themselues and in time of peace more then in time of warre The shippe that saileth many times incurres more danger when the Sea is quiet then when stormes arise for in the calme water the Saylers ride without care or dread of danger but in time of tempest they prouide for euery mischiefe that may befall I will tell them that sinners are linked and chayned nexed and twisted together so as one still draweth on another and the lesser euer a greater that Satan that foule thiefe and old Setter hath in each pack of Theeues little sins like little boyes to creepe in at the windowes or other narrower passages then open dores for greater sinners like greater theeues to enter sreely so spoile the goodman of the house of all goodnesse vertue at their pleasure I will teach sinners of presumption that as God is mercifull so hee is iust that wee must not so remember his mercy as we forget his Iustice. Our Lord is sweete but yet vpright All his wayes are mercy and truth These bee the two feete whereby hee walketh in his wayes that euery sinner that will truly turne to God must lay handfast on both these feete for if he lay hold on mercy onely letting passe iustice and truth he must needes perish by presumption If he apprehend Iustice onely without mercy he cannot but perish by desperation Let him therfore kisse both these feete that hee may in respect of Gods iustice retaine feare in respect of his mercy conceiue hope I 〈◊〉 teach them to tune their notes to my ditty I 〈◊〉 sing of mercy and 〈◊〉 I will not sing vnto thee 〈◊〉 mercy alone nor iudgement alone O God 〈◊〉 mercy and iudgement ioyned together I will teach them what an absurd cōsequence and vnkindly kind of reasoning it is In as much as God is merciful louing and long suffering therefore I will abuse his mercy and continue my wicked courses I will doe what liketh my wilfull appetite that the Argument in morall congruity as well as logicall diuinity holds strongly in the quite contrary forme God is gracious and expects my conuersion and the longer he expecteth the heauier will bee my punishment when it commeth if I neglect or rather contemne the riches of his patience and gentlenesse and therefore I ought euen to day before to morrow to heare his voyce and presently to accept of his vndeserued mercie Whereunto I will adde another consideration of great waight and much feare and that is Though God promise pardon to him that repents yet hee doth not promise repentance to him that offends Repentance is his gift alone Though hee offer thee grace to day thou knowest not whether hee will offer it againe to morrow though hee affoord thee life and memory this weeke little doest thou know whether thou shalt enioy these fauours the next Finally I will teach them to take my whole period together and not to catch at one piece onely for their aduantage or disaduantage rather which is against the rules both of Law and Logicke for when I haue said The eyes of the Lord are vpon the iust and his eares are bent to heare his prayers I adde on the other side in the same sentence But the face of the Lord is against them that doe euill to roote out their memory from off the earth My last Corollarie and conclusion shall be Blessed is the man that feareth the Lord Therefore serue the Lord in feare and reioyce in him with reuerence I will teach transgressors in all kindes and degrees that they doe not at any hand through the terrour of their owne sinnes or apprehension of Gods displeasure either by cowardize or carelesnesse quite despaire of Gods abundant mercie I will vse my best
Ut liberiùs 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 ignorant Bern. de grad humi Nemo est 〈◊〉 insanabilior qui sibi sanus 〈◊〉 Greg. in 〈◊〉 Initium salutis notitia 〈◊〉 Qui peccarese nescit corrigi non vult 〈◊〉 Frustrà medicantis auxilium expectat qui valnus non 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Non 〈◊〉 scire quo modo morbos curare conueniat qui vnde hi sunt ignorat Cornel. Cels. de Re 〈◊〉 lib. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 coelo descendit c. Gen 6. Chrysol Rectum index sui 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Gen. 4. Peccatores somniantibus similes Ioan. Her Insepulta sepultara Peccata non nocent si nō placent August de temp Job Meum cognoscere Meum agnoscere Tuum ignoscere August Explorandum 〈◊〉 Implorandum 〈◊〉 Syst. Omne sub regno grauiore regnum est 〈◊〉 Chrysol Fac illum 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 quem 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 is 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Chrysol Chrysost. Confessio peccati est professio desinendi Hilar. Seneca Reatus redundat ad iudicem si Poena percellat innoxium Chrysol 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Nisi homini Deus placuerit Deus non erit Homo iam Deo propitius esse 〈◊〉 Tertul Apolog. Peccatum poena peccati causa peccati Aug. contra Iuli. 〈◊〉 Chrysost. Aug. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 14. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Sapiens 〈◊〉 Deus est 〈◊〉 fractumnon recipiet 〈◊〉 Bernard de gradib obed Iob 36. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 meretur quà m amicum simuans inimicus 〈◊〉 de Conuers cap. 27. Tota vita honi Christiani est sanctum desiderium Aug. in 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 tota posita est in voluntate faciendi bona Lact. 〈◊〉 l. 6. Melius 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 auri 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 in Cantic Nec vinum 〈◊〉 etsi fecem habeat 〈◊〉 aurum quamuis 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 de 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Voluntas pro facto 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Ep. 77. 〈◊〉 Iuris Res mira ille viuit 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 homicida Illa casta tu tamen 〈◊〉 Aug. de verb. Dom. Nisi fortè putetur in 〈◊〉 quà m in bono c. Nos etsi 〈◊〉 minus diligimus quá 〈◊〉 diligimus 〈◊〉 qu 〈◊〉 valemus 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 vt à 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 vnde amplius diligamus 〈◊〉 Epist. 85. 〈◊〉 5. 6 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 14 21 30. Mal. 1. 14. Leu. 14. 22 30 31 32. 2. Cor. 8. Quic quid vis non potes 〈◊〉 Deus reputat Aug. Gen. 4. Si 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 ea quae 〈◊〉 merita nostra sunt spei quaedam seminaria bernard de 〈◊〉 lib. arbit Si non dilexisset 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 amicos Sicut nec quos 〈◊〉 essent si non dilexisset qui nondū erant Bern. in Cant. 20. Qu 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 inuenit neminem saluat nisi quem 〈◊〉 idem de 〈◊〉 li ber a. b 〈◊〉 10. Arra potius quà m 〈◊〉 quia 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 arra 〈◊〉 August de 〈◊〉 Apost Pignus donum est verbo 〈◊〉 vt Iureconsulti nec potest esse sine pacto pignus Ipse vt diligeretur dedit qui non dilectus dilexit Aug. in Joan. Psa. 119. 6. Psal. 64. Psal. 32. Psal. 32. 11. Cathedram in Coelo habet 〈◊〉 docet August Sol non omnes quibus lucet etiam calesacit Sic sapientia 〈◊〉 quos docet 〈◊〉 sit facien dum non 〈◊〉 accendu ad 〈◊〉 Bern. in Cant. Non 〈◊〉 sapientem sed timor facit quia afficit Grego Nunquam nimis dicitur quod nunquam satis dicitur Lingua sequitur dentem dolentem Vbidolor ibidigitus Ex. 12. 22. Leu. 14. 6. Num. 19. Prouerb Vermis non homo Omnis 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Cyrill Hug. Card. Lorin in Psal. 51. Iob 9. 30. Ier. 13. 23. Esay 1. Reuel 7. Esa. 63. Num. 12. Nulla vxor proprio marito deformis 〈◊〉 Nigra formosa Cantic 1. 5. Potest esse radix sine 〈◊〉 stipes sine fructu sed nec stipes nec fructus sine radice Mat. 9. 2. Psal. 35. 3. 〈◊〉 antequam nati Bern. Iob 15. 16. 〈◊〉 redditur arra 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Bernard Gaudium in praesenti exhibitione Gaudium in futurâ expectatione Et res plena gaudio 〈◊〉 Idem Gaudium in fine sed gaudium sine fine Bernard Iob 15. 35. Esa. 57. 20. Psal. 4. Cùm de transitorijs 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 non poterit non transire laetitia 〈◊〉 ijs de 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 ignis 〈◊〉 de Temp. Exod. 7. 〈◊〉 Psal. 32. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Deut. 32. Psal. 23. Psal 27. 8. Duo nomina Homo Peccator August Chrysol Chrysol Chrysol August in Psal. 103 〈◊〉 a diligentis Leuit. 〈◊〉 1. Sam. 15. Simulata aequitas non est aequitas sed duplex iniquitas quia 〈◊〉 simulatio August in Psal. 63. Amos 4. Psal. 115. 1. Cor. 15. Primum 〈◊〉 Arist. Psal. 42. Psal. 84. Psal. 1 39. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 13. 1. 〈◊〉 31. 3. Semel 〈◊〉 semper 〈◊〉 Mulier soetum conceptum non semper molitantem 〈◊〉 vbi tamen semel iterum 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 se esse non ambigit Spin. de 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 1. Pet. 1. 23. Tertull. de poenit Quid boni sanitas habet languor ostendit Hier. Gratior est reddita quā retenta sanit as Post tempestatem dulcior serenitas Quint. Desiderata dulcius obtinentur August de Verb. Dom. Quoniam ob bona 〈◊〉 gratias Deo non agimus necessaria nobis est priuatio vt quid habutrimus sentiamus Basil. Plus sensimus quod habuimus postquam habere desinimus Hier. in Consol. 1. 〈◊〉 5. 16. Rom. 8. 15. Ex. 13. 13. Onerat nos Deus 〈◊〉 quando 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Aug. in Ps. 〈◊〉 iniquorum 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 quia tales 〈◊〉 Bonum naturá sui diffusiuum Naturalis opus viuen gignere sibi simile Arist. Homines malunt exempla quā verba 〈◊〉 act 〈◊〉 ver sap Validior 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 quà m oris oratio Greg. Regis ad exemplum nec sic inflectere 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 edicta valent ac vita regentis Claud. Habent opera suam linguam Author de dupl martyr Sinne of infirmity Rom. 6. Vitia catenata inter se. 〈◊〉 in lib. Sapient Sinne of presumption Volo te praesumere ne diffidas 〈◊〉 praesumere ne torpescas Bern. Ep. 87. Psal. Bernard Psal. 101. 1 Absit vt redundantia clementiae coelestis libidinem faciat humanae temeritatis Tertul. de poenit Prauicordis est ideò 〈◊〉 esse quia Deus bonus est Bern. in Cantic Qui 〈◊〉 poenitenti veniam non 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 August Psal. 34. 15 Psal. 2. 11. Sinne of Desperation 〈◊〉 1 3. Facilè impetratur quod filius 〈◊〉 Tertul. de 〈◊〉 Esa. 49. Tam pater nemo tam 〈◊〉 nemo 〈◊〉 depoenit Iob 19. 25. 〈◊〉 16. 1. Rom. 8. 31. 〈◊〉 variata 〈◊〉 non fides August in Psal. 51. 2. Cor. 6. Ezek. 18. Esa. 1. Gen. 4. August Job 13. 15. August in Psal. 51. August ibid. August in Psal. 51. Chrysost. in Psal. 51. Nec enormitas criminis nec extremit as temporis Inter pontem fontem Sera 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 vera Psal. 48. 1. 95. 3. 〈◊〉 2. Verse 9. Leuit. 7. 26 27. Psal. 3. 8. Psal. 95. Debitorem se fecit deus non accipiendo Sed 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 c. Augus Psal. 25. 10 Psal. 132. 11. Ezech. 33. 11. O nos soelicis quorum causd Deus iurat O nos 〈◊〉 si nec Deo c. Tertul. 〈◊〉 Quid retribuam Psal. 116. 12. Inuenit 〈◊〉 aliquid Aug. Iob 22. 2. 1 Cor. 4. 7. Psal. 103. 〈◊〉 cont Mar cio 〈◊〉 50. 〈◊〉 PP 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Aug in 〈◊〉 Omnis quē poenitet rixatur secum Aug. in Psal. 33. Peccatores vindica 〈◊〉 exige de te poenas crucia teipsum c. Aug. in Psa. 140 Currat poenitentia 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 sententia Cbrys. In quantū tibi non peperceris in tantum tibi Deus parcet Tertul. de poenit Exod. 32. Tertul. de poeniten 〈◊〉 Nerue curuabitur arcus Igne Chalibs Adamas Sanguine corde Deus Mantuan Hostia 〈◊〉 ctatur viuit Crysol in 12. Rom. Sicut offerri iussit sic non 〈◊〉 occidi Chrysol Cyprian de dupl 〈◊〉 Genus 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 cito occidere Seneca Morsque minus poenā quam mora 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Maxim Eleg. Non Mar 〈◊〉 Sola sanguinis effusio consummat nec solam dat Palmam exustio illa 〈◊〉 Multi ducunt 〈◊〉 in 〈◊〉 Aug. Auth. de dupl Martyr Iob. 30. 29. August in Psal. Psal. 32. Esay 57. Esay 61. 3. Firmior est fides quam 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 de 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 5. Psal. 132. 14. Saluian Saluian Non Elegit 〈◊〉 sed c. Aug. Quare gratia quia gratis datur Quare gratis datur quia merita tua non 〈◊〉 sed beneficia Dei te 〈◊〉 Aug. in Psal. 30. Haue mercy vpon me O Lord c. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 c. I know my 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 c. Behold I was borne in iniquity c. Behold thou louest truth in the 〈◊〉 c. And in the 〈◊〉 of my heart c. Purge mee with Hysop c. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 and I 〈◊〉 be 〈◊〉 c. Make mee to heare of ioy c. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 sinnes c. Create in me a cleane heart c. Renew a right spirit within me c. Cast me not away from thy presence c. Take not thy holy spirit from me c. Restore vnto me the ioy of thy saluation c. Vphold me with thy free or firme spirit Then will I teach 〈◊〉 c. Deliuer me from bloud c. Thou God of my saluation c. I will sing aloud of thy righteousnesse c. O Lord open thou my lips c. The sacrifices of 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 c. A broken and a contrite heart c. Be fauourable to Sion c. Build 〈◊〉 the walls 〈◊〉 Ierusalem c. For thy good 〈◊〉 c. Then 〈◊〉 thou accept c.
Loue it selfe in the abstract The extent of thy goodnesse loue and mercy is such as hath no bounds the depth is such as hath no bottome The influence of it will make me feele that which no eloquence can vtter no intelligence can containe No man can tell how sweete hony is but hee that tasteth it I see O Lord great fruite of thy rich roote of Mercy For were not thy mercy exceeding great few or none could liue here the life of grace or there the life of glory Looke how many Saints there be in heauen or on earth by inchoation here in perfection there So many worthy examples so many infallible demonstrations there are of thine vnspeakeable mercy without which they should 〈◊〉 haue perished and sunke downe to Hell If therefore thy Iustice lift vp it selfe as the high Mountaines to eclipse the light of thy gracious countenance from mee I will raise my selfe yet higher in confidence of thy Truth which reacheth to the clouds and thy Mercy which mounts euen to the heauen of heauens I will frame this comfortable consequence to my distressed soule if thy mercy bee magnified aboue thy Iustice it must needs bee farre aboue my transgressions O Lord I haue caused my sinne to abound farre beyond the bankes and bounds of thy Law but it is thy property to pardon and the property of thy Mercy where sinne abounds there to superabound Thy mercy doth euen crosse and controule thy Iustice and as the highest Orbe doth by violence carry with it the inferior Spheres against their proper inclinations and motions So the force of thy powerfull mercy doth ouerrule my naturall and wilfull courses running to wickednesse and in that race hasting to iust condemnation My sinnes therefore how great soeuer cannot stop the flowing of thy vast Ocean of Mercy When I fall into computation and comparison of my sinnes on the one side and thy mercies on the other I finde by diuine Arithmetike and the true Iacobs-staffe to my singular comfort that my sinnes how great and how many soeuer yet may bee both measured and reckoned but on the other part that neither the magnitude nor the multitude of thy mercies can be either fathomed or numbred I beg thy great Mercy because thy lesser mercies will not doe the turne which my miserable condition requires For they may ease me of lesser miseries of afflictions in body of distresses in estate of other incumbrances in the world but it is thy larger Mercy that must forgiue not my lesser only but my greater sinnes which haue prouoked thy iust and heauy indignation against me Thy wayes O God are not as mans wayes nor thy mercies as mans mercies Mans mercy is short and scant mingled with hardnesse and maymed with sundry imperfections In ciuill matters some man will forgiue the interest but not the principall some man will forgiue the halfe but not the whole debt some man will forbeare to demand the debt yet will not forgoe the Bond hee will keepe that to curbe his debtor vpon all occasions In matters criminall one will forgiue the fault but not the punishment another will remit a part but not all the penalty a third will forgiue but not forget the iniury But thy Mercy O Lord is great large free and absolute intire and indefinite or rather infinite Thou forgiuest both the fault and punishment royally and really all is acquitted and discharged at once in accomplishment of that comfortable clause in the cloze of thy new Couenant Thou wilt remember our iniquities no more The multitude of my sinnes occasions me to parallel them with the multitude of thy mercies that there may bee a medicine for each malady a salue for euery sore I touch still vpon one and the same string though with some variety because the meditation and modulation of this mercy of thine is as sweet Musicke in mine eare and a ioyfull Iubile in my soule I striue to expresse one and the same thing in diuers words or phrases great mercy and a multitude of mercies being all one in sence and meaning for great mercy comprehends a multitude of mercies and a multitude of mercies amounts to one great masse of mercy The greatest mercy that the greatest person can doe to the most miserable wretch vpon earth is not to bee compared to the least of thy mercies which thou affoordest to the holiest man that liues in regard of the infinite disproportion that is betweene the Offendor and the Offended the Creator of Heauen and earth and dust and ashes Howbeit euen in thine infinite mercy as it hath relation to sinfull man there be degrees whereof we cannot better take the skantling then by our greater or lesser offences committed against thy diuine Maiesty for the Law of gratitude amongst men teacheth mee to acknowledge that thy loue is greater to them to whō thou forgiuest greater thē to such as thou acquitest of smaller debts Therefore as my more heynous sinnes at the Tribunall of thy iustice do call for seuerer punishment so at thy throne of mercy which is aboue thy seate of iustice and to which I appeale as to thy Court of last resort they begge and craue for thy more great and tender compassions Debt is a burthen and a great debt is an heauy burden hee that beares an honest minde cannot be quiet in minde so long as hee continues in debt My sins are my debts and that scoare runnes still in my minde whereon I haue runne so fast and so farre I professe truly that my sins haue gone ouer not my body only but my head also and that they are a burden too heauy for mee to beare I know O Lord thou keeper of men that thou markest what is amisse in me thou scorest vp my sinnes my wilde and wandring thoughts my vaine and wicked words my foule and filthy actions thou keepest a day and a debt-booke of them to charge mee by way of account whensoeuer it pleaseth thee thou settest them downe in capitall and red letters to declare thine anger thou grauest them with the poynt of a Diamond and writest them with a pen of Iron both in thy Registry of Heauen and in the Tablet of mine own conscience on earth placing on the right side thereof the straight rules of thy Law and mine Obliquities on the left each as a foile to set forth the other Debts must either be paid or forgiuen else they cannot be discharged Pay O Lord I cannot I am become bankrupt I am not able no not by way of composition to answer thee one for a thousand Therefore it remaines onely that I beseech thee whose propertie it is to haue mercy and forgiue to crosse this debt-booke to wipe out the score to cancell the hand-writing and deface the record that is against me to put away and blot out my transgressions that there may remaine no memory of them either to prouoke thy heauy vengeance or to affright my
looke towards heauen thou doest nourish and cherish them thou art vtterly vnwilling to quench or extinguish them and when thou findest but such an inclination in my will thou doest strengthen it with wisedome in my vnderstanding When the vnderstanding and wil concurre that I both know what to doe and am desirous to do it then doe I bring it to effect or which is all one in effect thou in thy gracious goodnesse doest accept it as if it were effected Thou louest truth O Lord for thou louest thy selfe who art Truth it selfe essentiall Truth Truth not in words onely but in actions and euen in thoughts also that is to say Veritie and Sinceritie in all things Thou louest truth in the reines not in the shaddowes of my outward actions which I can disguise at pleasure but in the most hidden close and couert imaginations of the heart which thou seest continually and knowest exactly Thou art by a paramount power and a peculiar attribute stiled The searcher of the heart and reynes Who knowes my heart but thou alone therefore thou canst not but loue truth in the heart and reynes that is the most pleasing and delightfull obiect thy pure and All-seeing Eye can fixe vpon As thou louest trueth and sincerity in the heart and reynes so thou hatest all dissimulation and hypocrisie Thou canst not abide that which is faire in shew and foule in deed Thou canst not abide dissembled holinesse fained repentance Thou abhorrest such as make a sowre face hang downe their heads like bulrushes that they may seeme to fast and mourne that make false semblance of piety in their outward fashion and in the sight of men when thou seest their hearts to bee farre from that they should or pretend to be The light faith Iob is as the shaddow of death to such the hollow-hearted doe but heape vp and increase wrath No man deserues 〈◊〉 of God or man then 〈◊〉 enemy pretending friendship yea thou so louest truth in the inward parts as thou acceptest them for iust and righteous who 〈◊〉 such onely in respect of their desire study and indeauour though their practice bee most imperfect such as sincerely and heartily affect to serue please thee though they come farre short of the due performance of thy Word and will As a husband passeth by with conniuence and beareth with patience many faults and imperfections in his wife so long as she is true and loyall and keepeth her selfe chastely and solely to him Euen so thou O God winckest at many errours and pardonest many offences in thy people to whom thou hast married thy selfe in mercy so long as they bee such as they ought to bee in the mayne point that is in the truth of their affection and the sincerity of their deuotion towards thee To increase the comfort which I apprehend in this sweet Meditation and Admiration I follow the scent as it were and represent to my minde and memory the sundry traces and footsteps of thy maruellous mercy First That it is not so much the quantity as the 〈◊〉 not so much the 〈◊〉 as the sincerity of grace which thou regardest A little 〈◊〉 and course gold is of much more value then much bright copper then much shining brasse An 〈◊〉 of gold is true gold 〈◊〉 it bee mingled with much drosse Nor will a man that is in his right wits cast away his gold for the foulenes be it but a graine or two wrapped vp in a great masse of other earth but will keep the one with the other till hee haue fined and seuered the one from the other In like maner thy grace in the hearts of thy children though it bee still mixed with many imperfections and corruptions too yet it is true grace and 〈◊〉 all the 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 and 〈◊〉 shewes of it that are 〈◊〉 in the liues either of Heathens or 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 I hope strongly 〈◊〉 wilt not reiect it though it bee neuer so small in 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 and refine nee so as my 〈◊〉 osse may be 〈◊〉 and thy grace more and more 〈◊〉 in me 〈◊〉 that in thy 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 thou art wont to 〈◊〉 the wil for the worke and the desire for the deed As in euill the very desire and indeuour of ill doing makes me to stand guilty before thee though the euill bee not actually done Hee that lusts after a woman He that hates his brother the one is an adulterer the other a murtherer So in goodnesse the settled study true desire and earnest indeauour of holinesse and piety causes me to bee esteemed pious and holy in thy sight though I cannot attaine to that measure of it that I would and should for thou Lord regardest more what I affect and desire to be then what I am more what I indeauour and striue to doe then what I doe Such vndoubtedly is thy disposition such ought to be my apprehension vnlesse I will needs to thy dishonour and mine owne disaduantage peeuishly and peruersly imagine that Thou being Loue it selfe art more prone to punish 〈◊〉 to pardon that Thou being Mercy it selfe art more forward to reuenge then to reward thy seruants and children Thirdly that thou doest exact no more of thine then thou hast bestowed vpon them For I obserue to my singular contentment in the legall sacrifices and oblations how low thou doest in mercie descend Thou art content to accept a Sheepe or two or a Lambe or two for a Sacrifice or if a man bee not 〈◊〉 to bring so much thou 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 pleased with one or if he want meanes for a Lambe thou art not vnwilling to take a paire of 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 or two little Pigeon instead of it yea if a 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 not able to 〈◊〉 so farre 〈◊〉 a handfull or two of flowre with a 〈◊〉 of salt or two doeth s 〈◊〉 where it is offered with an honest heart There is a curse laid vpon the coozener who 〈◊〉 a sound or a fatte male in his flock bringeth a corrupt carrion or a leane starueling to thee for a sacrifice But hee is not accursed who bringeth no better because he hath no better to bring And I finde it often iterated for the comfort of poore and weake ones that being not able to offer as the rich did might therfore doubt of the like acceptation Looke what he is able according to his ability euen what his hand is able to reach vnto and it shall be accepted for thou measurest the gift not by the worth or greatnesse of it but by the might and minde onely of the giuer Thou doest not so much regard what I should as what I can and am willing to doe What I would but cannot doe thou doest account it as done Thou crownest willingnes when thou findest not ablenesse in me to performe Cain offered sacrifices but thou didst not accept them because thou didst see his cruell heart But Abel his sacrifices were
bee without this heate he that hath that Sun cannot be without this light When my great and enormous sinnes had plunged me into the sea of misery finding no other meane of helpe in that fearefull danger I catched vp and tooke hold of the planke or boordof Repentance to saue me from drowning Repentance hath two faces and so looketh two wayes backward and forward to sinnes past and holinesse to come I haue grieuously lamented my offences formerly done and importunately begged pardon for them accounting this remission because thou art pleased O God so to esteeme it my iustification I now earnestly craue a cleane heart and a new spirit that being clensed I may keep my selfe cleane that being renewed I may entertaine newnesse of life for my sanctification For if I fall againe vpon the same rock of presumption which caused my shipwracke before it will plainely appeare that I haue not really acted but formally counterfeited repentance in which case I must pronounce an heauie doome against my selfe for dissembled holinesse is double wickednesse wickednesse masking vnder the sinfull vayle and vizard of hypocrisie Repentance neuer attaines her Crowne and Garland till shee haue brought forth amendment of life after lamentation for sin to make some kind of reparation That which thou requirest of me O God is my heart and how can I deny thee one thing that hast giuen me all things for what haue I that I haue not receiued of thee Well then I resolue as it is meet to giue thee my heart But when I looke into my heart by the helpe of thy suruey for it is thou that declarest vnto man what and how ill his heart is I finde it so foule and full of corruption as I am ashamed to present it vnto thee in that plight Nay I tremble to thinke that thy Pure and Radiant Eyes should behold such a puddle and sincke of sinne as lurketh in my heart For alas euery imagination of the thoughts of my heart is onely euill continually Were my heart such as it should be I would cheerefully giue thee my heart O Lord therefore create in mee a cleane heart Thou madest my heart first in Adam hee marred it and I in him by disobedience from him to all his posterity the contagion of this pollution is spred and propagated wherefore create my heart againe create it a cleane heart either a cleane heart or no heart at all I affect purity of heart by thy grace for indeed I cannot so much as affect much lesse effect it without thee Vnlesse thou take the worke in hand it will be vndone My heart that is originally and totally vncleane by naturall generation and daily soiled by actuall transgression cannot become cleane and neate without spirituall washing and supernaturall regeneration and that is thy proper operation Seeke not to new make mould my defiled hart out of the forebeing matter thereof That may seeme a strange enterprize and fruitlesse worke But thou O God who by thy power madest the world of nothing by thy powerfull grace Create which is thy peculiar attribute a cleane heart within me To create is not to make a thing out of the power of any subiect or matter formerly being But to create is to make a thing of nothing and that is an act of diuine power that is a case excepted and a prerogatiue reserued to thee alone The production of grace in a gracelesse heart is a wonderfull and gracious creation Create in mee powerfully and of nothing without any 〈◊〉 matter create in me 〈◊〉 and for nothing without any precedent merit of mine a pure heart so 〈◊〉 thou crowne in mee not my deserts but thine 〈◊〉 gifts if ought proceed from my heart to my tongue or hand not displeasing vnto thee Worke this worke thy selfe and take the praise of it to thy selfe alone O God Not vnto mee not vnto me I doe iterate and ingeminate my disclaymer but vnto thy Name giue all the glory It is another manner of power to make the quality then the substance of the heart yea it is a harder taske to make a heart cleane that hath beene soiled with the filth and tainted with the putrifaction of sin then to make a pure and innocent heart at the first The more shall be my thankfulnesse if thou O Lord vouchsafe me so great a fauour I will not curiously enquire into the meanes or manner of atchieuing this worke Let me henceforth really finde by the imaginations and inclinations of it that it is a cleane heart conformed as it may be in the frailty of 〈◊〉 flesh 〈◊〉 thy holy 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 all is well As a woman 〈◊〉 by the stirring of the 〈◊〉 in her wombe that 〈◊〉 hath conceiued so 〈◊〉 me feele by the effectuall motions of thy good 〈◊〉 that I am begotten anew vnto a liuely 〈◊〉 by the resurrection of Christ according to his abundant mercy The summe of all is Giue me O Lord what thou enioynest and then enioyne mee what thou pleasest I am of no ability to do what thou commandest and therefore am enforced to beseech thee thy selfe to do in me what thou requirest to bee done of me Create a cleane heart in me If my heart as the spring and conduit head be pure and cleane the waters that flow thence though conueighed in earthen pipes will be cleare still my secret thoughts my open words my visible workes though they sauour somewhat of earth and flesh will not be altogether vncleane and vnsauoury A man must bee twice borne ere he can enter into the kingdome of heauen As he is made to the similitude of the first Adam so must he be made to the similitude of the second Adam and the regeneration is a more excellent worke then the generation the re-creation then the creation In the first man was wrought out of clay in the other God workes grace out of sinne In the former he breathed a soule into the dead body here he breatheth his holy Spirit into a dead heart In the creation he made man perfect in all his members In this re-creation not only all the members of the body but the faculties of the soule also must be framed anew It is a greater matter to raise a man dead in sinne then to raise a rotten carkasse out of the graue In the one birth and the other the heart is the first 〈◊〉 that is enlyued my 〈◊〉 must first take fire 〈◊〉 can I neuer bee 〈◊〉 with the true zeale of 〈◊〉 glory and mine owne saluation In the first creation this 〈◊〉 Chaos and darke 〈◊〉 was couered by thy 〈◊〉 without any contradiction or resistance Thou spakest but the word and all was readily done and perfectly framed But in my re-creation my flesh or my spirit or my fleshly spirit doth oppose and incounter thy holy Spirit grieueth and maketh it sad laboureth to quench it euen then when it striueth to reuiue repaire and reforme me This is notoriously verified
quickly slips from good Meditations and Actions slides from honest purposes and proceedings vnlesse it bee sustained by thy Spirit But being quickned and enlyued by thy Spirit though otherwise dead I shal liue in thee by thee for thee all my thoughts words and workes shall breathe continually thy praise and glory Thy Spirit O Lord is the life of my soule as my spirit is the life of my body if my spirit faile my body perisheth if thy Spirit desert my soule my soule cannot but fall irrecouerably Wherefore vphold mee with thy Spirit Thy Spirit is free in it selfe As the winde bloweth so the Spirit breatheth where it listeth As it is a free so it is a freeing Spirit a Spirit of liberty which deliuereth me from the bondage of Sinne a Spirit of Adoption whereby I cry Abba Father As the Spirit is free so are those that are led by the Spirit free ingenuous bold and couragious it infranchizeth and naturalizeth me in the heauenly Hierusalem This Spirit hath power to helpe all my infirmities it hath skill and will to frame my Supplications within me to be expressed if not by tongue voyce yet by sighes and grones vnutterable but still intelligible to thee it can preserue mee from falling it can raise mee after I haue falne and then so establish mee that I shall neuer come againe into danger of relapse or recidiuation My spirit thus vpheld and established by thy free Spirit what is it else but a cheerefull alacrity and forward disposition to imbrace any thing that is good for it owne sake and for thy sake without any by or secondary respect whatsoeuer banisheth all drowzy dulnesse and vntoward listlesnesse in thy seruice that putteth wings to my obedience and maketh it not to walke slowly but to flye nimbly in the accomplishment of thy errands and directions that causeth me to doe ingenuously what becommeth me for loue of vertue and not for feare of the whip basely When thou hadst appointed that the first 〈◊〉 of euery beast should bee set apart to thee thou diddest specially ordaine that if it were the Foale of an Asse it should be redeemed with a Lambe if it were not the necke of it should bee broken thou wouldest not haue it sacrificed vnto thee at any hand Surely it may well seeme that this is alterius rei 〈◊〉 a kinde of riddle and that by this shaddow thou wouldest shew thy 〈◊〉 of slothfulnesse and 〈◊〉 want of life and cheerefulnesse in thy seruice that an Asse being one of thy dullest creatures Sloth is wont to bee pictured riding on an Asse thou wouldest not bee honoured by the sacrifice of such a beast Thou O Lord louest a swift hearer a cheerefull giuer a zealous Petitioner a voluntary Souldier and a diligent 〈◊〉 for all which purposes thy free and firme Spirit will strongly enable and support mee continually Wherefore establish mee with thy free Spirit O Lord. 13 Then will I teach transgressors thy wayes and sinners or impious persons shall be conuerted vnto thee WHen thou hast vouchsafed graciously to bestow vpon mee those graces whereof I haue gracelesly 〈◊〉 my selfe then will I 〈◊〉 my selfe gratefull vnto thee I will 〈◊〉 that dutie of thankefulnesse so sutable to humanity so agreeable to piety it being a thing good and commendable 〈◊〉 and profitable pleasant and dilectable 〈◊〉 gracefull to returne praises and thankes to thee for thy mercies duly to acknowledge and truly to 〈◊〉 thy singular fauours in such manner as I can and by such meanes as are within the reach of my weake and worthlesse ability I will not follow the common fashion of worldly men who like barrels sound when they are empty but are still when they are full who craue earnestly when they feele want but are dumbe and silent when their turne is serued I solemnely vow and will really performe thankfull acknowledgement for so great benefits when I haue receiued them Thou O God by difburthening man of his sin doest impose a burthen of gratitude vpon him A benefit is a burthen to an ingenuous minde that cannot rest quietly but lyeth shut vp as it were in prison straightly till it haue procured liberty by venting some kinde of retribution Although there can be no proportion betweene thy infinite goodnesse and my not onely finite but infinitely weake meanes of requitall yet inasmuch as for a more bountifull fauour a larger returne of 〈◊〉 is of congruence required and the greatest blessing that can bee bestowed vpon a mortall man in this life is peace of conscience intended by the ioy of thy saluation and implyed in the firme support of thy free Spirit I will indeauour in way of 〈◊〉 to doe thee the best seruice that any man can performe vpon earth that is I will teach thy wayes to Transgressors and cause as much as in me lyeth sinners to bee conuerted vnto thee I will teach such as wander and goe aftray how to come into the way Againe those that goe by-wayes I will teach thy wayes that is the wayes of thy directions which leade vs by a right line as it were through the maze of this miserable world to the land of Canaan that happy country which we should so loue and long for Conuerted sinners are the fittest conuerters of sinners The sickly Physician who hath not onely read in his Booke but felt in his body the maladies whereupon hee is consulted is the likeliest man to worke a cure vpon his patient Goodnesse of it owne nature is apt to spread and inlarge it selfe It is the most naturall and kindly worke of each liuing creature to engender a like vnto it selfe As in nature so is it in nurture also An honest well-disposed man will striue as much as hee can to make others good and godly A chast and sober man will endeauour to restrayne and reclayme others from wantonnesse and drunkennesse the like may bee said of all other vertues and vices The rule of Charity requires that he who hath beene raysed out of the dyrt and reskued out of the myre should lift vp others who lye wallowing therein If we be once inflamed with the loue of God and godlinesse wee shall labour to kindle the zeale of others set them on fire also Bad men are and why should not good men much more become Incendiaries This is the matter and effect of my gratitude which though it may seeme to be no great matter For my goodnesse extendeth not to thee neither art thou any whit the better for my being better any way the grace is thine the good is mine alone yet I know it to bee very aceptable and highly pleasing vnto thee being so louing and gracious so couetous of mans saluation as thou dost euen hunger and thirst after his conuersion Thou dost euen long for our returne home from out of those farre remote countries wherein wee haue wandred and spent our patrimony of thy gifts in wickednesse to
skill and bestowe the most powerful perswasion I can deuise or find 〈◊〉 for the purpose I will tell them of my Soliloquie and the secret conference between me and my soule to this effect Though vnhappy man that I am I haue not alone slipped but falne and not falne onely but falne fouly too though I haue not onely done much euill carelesly but This Euill This Euill in Gods sight contemptuously This Euill which is a massie chaine of enormous iniquities nexed and linked together strongly binding and grieuously burthening my soule yet will I not doe worse or rather what is worst of all I will not still adde sinne vnto sinne I will not fill vp the full measure of my wickednesse with that horrible sinne of sinnes I will not stab my soule if I may so say with the deadly dagger of finall impenitencie for the depth of desperation is the height of impious abomination I will not wilfully wayue and scornefully reiect his general free and gracious Pardon proclaimed to all penitent sinners without any exception or limitation at all His benefits are infinite endlesse and inestimable therefore the Origen fountaine and well-spring of all these fauours graces and good-turnes is infinite vnmeasurable and farre surpassing all the compasse of mans vnderstanding But specially he loueth soules which are his by a manifold interest created by him when they were not saued by him when they were lost marked for his with the stampe of his owne Image Farre be it therefore from me to fall into that desperate resolution which of all other offences vpon earth doeth most exasperate his anger and doth depriue his diuine Maiestie of that most excellent propertie wherin hee chiefly delighteth and glorieth which is his infinite and vnspeakable mercie I am his workemanship his hands haue made me and fashioned me The workeman cannot chuse but bee fauourable to his owne worke especially so excellent and bountiful a workman as he is towards such a worke as man is framed to his owne shape and likenesse He is my Creator and thereby priuy to my frailety of how brittle and weake a metall I was made Hee is my Father which is the title of the greatest loue and coniunction that nature hath left to men in this world and therefore cannot but affect his child His diuine Maiestie is so earnest and vehement to giue assurance in this behalfe that being not contented to represent his loue vnto vs by the loue of a fathers heart hee goeth further yet and protesteth that his heart is more tender towards vs then the heart of any mother can bee to the onely child of her owne wombe Can the mother forget her owne infant if she could yet can I not forget or reiect thee Nay he is my heauenly Father who in this perfection of true fatherly loue so farre exceedeth all earthly parents put together as in power clemencie and goodnesse he surpasseth the infirmity of his feeble creatures and therefore his bowels and entralls of tender and endlesse mercy will be mooued I know in commiseration towards mee vnfaignedly returning vnto him Nay I haue yet a further claime and title to his gracious fauour compassionate mercy in that hee is not only my Creator and Father but my Redeemer also I know with holy Iob that my Redeemer liueth for I haue 〈◊〉 it by his 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 and 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 that 〈◊〉 will 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 hell nor suffer his 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 to see 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 this be not 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 to the 〈◊〉 by the act 〈◊〉 execution and performance 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 in the fulnesse of time it will bee accomplished and acted to the admiration of all the earth and the amplification of his eternall glory Not his Sonne onely but his onely Sonne will take my nature vpon him become flesh of my flesh and bone of my bones will vouchsafe to bee borne of a Virgin descended of mine owne race and pedigree hee will conuerse vpon the earth in the similitude of sinfull flesh hee will in the nature and property of man not onely suffer hunger and thirst but also all manner of indignities affronts and disgraces hee will be content to be beaten and buffeted launced pierced wounded and crucified for mee and for my sake hee will shead his blood vpon the Crosse as a malefactor to satisfie Gods iustice and to purchase my freedome from hell and euerlasting damnation And sithence he hath in his immutable decree giuen him and will in his time apparently giue him to such a shamefull death for gayning me vnto him how should he not but with him giue all things else whatsoeuer I know and am assured that he who beleeueth in Christ to come hath as 〈◊〉 and full interest in his excessiue loue and this inestimable benefit as hee who shall beleeue in him when and after he is come The times must bee changed but it is and will bee one and the same faith yea and one the same obiect of faith in substance in all times His promises of pardon whereby he hath obliged himselfe to sorrowfull sinners are affectionate absolute and vniuersall First Whosoeuer shall depart from his wicked wayes turne vnto him shall bee receiued of him Secōdly At what time soeuer a sinner doth repent him of his sinne and turne to him his wickednesse shall not hurt him Thirdly If your sinnes were as red as scarlet they shall be made as white as snow How then can I mistrust my selfe to bee excluded from this assurance of mercy wherein all sorts of people all kinds of sinnes all times and seasons are comprehended His Loue that calls mee to repentance is inexplicable His Truth and certainty of promise is infallible His Power of performance is omnipotent and endlesse This threefold cord or rope which cannot bee broken bindeth mee fast to the barre of his mercy and will not suffer mee to slip away or start a side till I haue obtained full remission of all my sinnes Cain my vnhappy precedent in murther did more offend God by those words My sinne is greater then that I can hope for pardon then by all his former iniquities My confidence in this mercy is assured and my hope inuincible therefore I resolue though he kill mee yet to trust in him with holy Iob. I will tell such hopeles and retchlesse persons that my sinnes are set before them for caution my repentance for imitation that they which stand may warily looke to their footing that they fall not and they that haue 〈◊〉 may rise hopefully and speedily by 〈◊〉 and not ingulfe themselues into the depth of all detestable enormities specially the gulfe of desperation I will tell them that their vouching of my example to extenuate is an odious circumstance to aggrauate such sinnes as I haue committed So as he that shrowdes himselfe vnder this sinfull shaddow offends euen in that respect in a higher