petition or praises must come in after what sort they be conveniently expressed and sometimes when my condition requires and my time will permit me to be more large or earnest in any part of prayer with what arguments I may strengthen my faith and plead with God touching what I desire to speed for or again with what circumstances of my sins or Gods mercies I may heighten my repentance for my sins or thankfulness for those mercies If I do not use my self to a set form then will it be necessary that I more deliberately meditate what I intend to confess to ask to praise God for how â— shall so call upon him or conceive of him as may suit with those main and principal addresses which I am to make to him Whether every particular expression or the just words be forethought it haply matters not very much but that some fit significant proper and quickning expressions for the several parts and substantials of my prayer be prepared it is expedient as well for the greater readiness of the soul in prayer which when it is much to seek in this case cannot do its duty with attention nor without disturbance and intermission of due affection as also that nothing unworthy of the nature of prayer and the worship of God may be offered up unto him And in this point it may be singularly helpfull to consider what of those expressions promises narratives experiences c. which I have at any time read in the Word of God may be useful to me in those my intended addresses to the Throne of grace God as already intimated loves to hear his own language from us and so it is that the very expressions of Scripture have a marvellous affecting power upon the devout heart beyond those which seem not to have been alike sanctified by the holy Ghost using them Chap. VI. Of Prayer and first of its substance and parts WHat I have read being thus digested through Meditation and by the like meditation preparation being made for Prayer that now remains as the third and most compleat act of my daily devotion touching which besides the precepts already given others yet remain to be given when the consideration of the nature of the duty hath a little made way for them Now Prayer is the seeking unto God and before him representing our Estates and Desires The general nature of prayer is a betaking or addressing our selves to God and therefore its first act is Invocation or calling upon him Now our condition who are dust ashes his Majesty being considered we cannot well be esteemed to seek unto him without adoration or worshiping of him in the beginning of these our addresses for that in all seeking to Superiours we ever begin with some acknowledgments of their being above us able to help us c. upon which accounts we use ordinarily some testimonies of reverence towards them If we therefore put both these together we have the first part of Prayer to wit An invocatory adoration of God that is an humble calling upon him accompanied with Worshipping and adoring his infinite Majesty And this in most compleat prayers extant is Scripture we may observe particularly in that for ever to be reverenced pattern our Lords prayer the first sentence contains what we speake of Our Father this is a calling upon God which art in Heaven these are words befitting one who adores his Majesty So in that prayer of Hezekiah I saiah xxxvii 16. O Lord of Hosts God of Israel that dwellest between the Cherubims thou art God even thou alone c. How evidently doth this beginning of his prayer carry in it a calling upon God accompanied with the acknowledgement and adoration of his Deity The first part of prayer we gathered out of those words expressing its general nature it is a seeking unto God The second we may gather out of them which follow it is a representing our estate before him Our estates naturally are sinful and miserable SO far forth as we retain any thing of our old nature so far are sin and misery inseparable adjuncts or attendants unto us The representing therefore our estates before God is the confessing our sins and laying open our grievances and wants before him A second part of prayer then is Confession That which all sinners should desire is pardon that which all miserable persons do naturally desire is help The representing then our desires before God is the begging mercy and grace to help in time of need that is 1. Pardon of sin 2. Deliverance from our misery Internal by the sanctification of our hearts Externall by meet supplies of our outward wants A third act of prayer therefore is Petition of Asking Somewhat more yet is considerable in our states here below which though naturally miserable as aforesaid yet are by the manifold grace of God made in several respects more comfortable by reason of variety of blessings Now he that receives a benefit ought to have at the least a will and desire of thankfulness He therefore who duely represents his state and desires unto God laies open also before him those several mercies which at his hands he receives humbly blessing and praising him the author of them The last part of prayer then is Thanksgiving Now because all these may be done either for our selves or others therefore is prayer double or of two sorts That which meerly respects our selves That which we offer up for others called Intercession From all this it is evident that the first thing which he who would learn to pray must take care of is that he throughly know himself that is 1. Be acquainted with his own state with his sins his miseries and wants inward and outward otherwise he can never duly represent them unto God 2. That he well know his own desires and resolutions lest he play the hypocrite with God asking what he desireth not or vowing what he intends not These are the substantials of prayer Chap VII Of the right manner of prayer First of its inward manner Some considerations to quicken to sincerity and heartiness in Prayer What graces are to be exercised in each part of Prayer THe manner of the performing every duty is much looked upon by God Now prayer being such an immediate act of worship and it being most just reasonable and necessary that we should worship God with the whole man that is both with soul and body in the manner of prayer there can be onely considerable its Inward and Outward part The inward manner of prayer is unquestionably most respected by God for that according hereunto is the prayer and the man sincere or otherwise And the Consideration hereof should incite us cheifly to care herein I may pray in as good as many words in as devout postures and in a word after as pious a sort as to what there is outward in prayer as ever man did and yet he hypocritical in my prayers But it is impossible that I
should pray with my Soul and all that is within me and not be cordial honest and sincere in those prayers which I so make And therefore as God doth so I say every Christian ought to look cheifly to the inward disposition of his soul in his Devotions We may note further for our quickening herein that God not onely requireth the heart in prayer but hath accepted and often doth accept the inward breathings of it and answer them as fully as if all other circumstances belonging to the outward manner of prayer had been observed As in the case of Hannah who in that so successfull and effectual prayer of hers spaks in her heart onely Now prayer is then right as to its inward manner when there is an hearty excercise of Christian graces and affections suitable to the substance of the prayer which we offer up to God That is to say to go through the parts of prayer I adore and call upon God as I ought when in my calling upon him I really believe that he is and that he is such as he hath revealed himself to be and as I now expresse or conceive him and therefore with reverence humbly submit my self before his majesty It is a piece of holy skill worthy taking notice of which is observable in the prayers of holy men in Scripture They usually so frame their invocations or callings upon God as may suit with their main business at the throne of grace and strenghthen their faith for those particular mercies which they aske Thus in that sorenamed prayer of Hezechias's against the Assyrian Armies O Lord of hosts for he prayed against a mighty host and for deliverance from it God of Israel he therefore so cals God to put him in mind of his covenant with Israel that he might stretch forth his hand for the deliverance of his own people who dwellest between the Cherubims that is who hast here recorded thy name and promised to meet and blesse and from thy mercy Seat to answer thy people He therefore makes mention of Gods promised presence or dwelling between the Cherubims that he might prevail with God to save that City where his Temple and this his mercy Seat was placed Every expression in this his invocation hath somewhat in it proper to his suit and of force to strengthen his faith and dependance upon God that he might the more surely prevail In short then the graces to be exercised in adoration or calling upon God cheifly are Faith Fear or Reverence of God and Humility I then confesse my self to God as I ought when with hearty sorrow and repentance which if earnest will be accompanied with a kind of indignation against my self I lay open impartially my sins before him not sparing the sweetest or closest and with an humble sense of my own vilenesse impotency and emptinesse acknowledg my wants or his just judgments upon me for any of my sins So that the chief grace to be exercised peculiarly in confession is repentance or Godly sorrow an humble and tender sense of what we confesse accompanied with shame of our selves Further then I aske as I ought when as sensible of mine own unworthinesse out of an humble trust in God through the merits of his Son which trust his gracious promises and declarations of good will through him by me ever had respect to do encourage me to take up I heartily desire what I aske at his hands or at least am heartily sorry if I cannot say I heartily desire all I aske Now because while I am asking it so cometh to passe that I often intermix somewhat of vow as in asking the pardon of some past sins many times I engage to diligent and watchfull opposition for the future against them therefore is it necessary that if I would ask aright I ask with resolution and purpose of endeavouring a new life And further for that I cannot expect forgivenesse from God except I forgive from my heart my brethren therefore I must ask in charity So then the Graces cheifly to be exercised in Petition are First Faith or an humble trust and hope in God through Jesus Christ that I shall speed which is most truly Praying in his name Secondly Love towards God and holinesse Thirdly a stedfast purpose of obedience which is the most considerable part of repentance Fourthly Charity towards my Brethren Lastly I then praise or give God thanks for his mercies as I ought when I have an inward acknowledgement and sense that it is him alone and through his meer savour that I enjoy these mercies and when not onely I my self do admire but desire that heaven and earth may admire him for his goodness when also I do all this with a resolution of improving the mercy given that is of walking as it becometh one who hath been vouchsafed of such a blessing So that the graces to be exercised in thanksgiving chiefly are 1. Humility or a sense of our own unworthiness and of Gods free mercy and grace the onely fountain of all received or hoped for benefits 2. Love or an administration of his goodness accompanied with a desire that he may receive all possible glory for it 3. Resolution and study of greater and more suitable obedience and duty to him These are those graces in the exercise of which the due inward manner of prayer or a praying temper consists a composition so amiable as that it will ever where it is send up an odour of a sweet savour unto Heaven and delight shall I say or overcome the Almighty Majesty Chap. VIII Of the best outward manner of Prayer in sit postures and sit words Of praying by gift and the inconveniences alledgeable against it Of praying by a form and the inconveniencies alledgable against it An accommodation and reconcilement of both IN the outward manner of prayer the chief points considerable are the use of sit postures and meet words Now though the posture of the body seem to be a small matter yet methinks my prayers wants their due solemnity if not performed in a posture of worship True it is many a devout prayer a man may make riding upon his horse back walking in the fields and the like and right Christian is it thus to sanctifie my necessary journies or the time which otherwise would be wholy lost in travel or stoln away by such recreatory obambulation But these are occasional and not my set and solemn devotions Here my body being otherwise necessarily imployed the most which I can give to God is my soul or if to my thoughts my words be added it is as much as well can be But in my fixt course of devotion it is not to be supposed that I worship God aliud agens imployed with any thing but his worship and therefore herein let my body as well as my soul be taken up in meet acts of worship Now that I account to be the best posture of worship which best expresseth an inward reverence of that Majesty
through Christ according to the promise of the Gospel that I doing thus my sins shall not be laid to my charge as being taken away by the cross of Christ in whose merits I have through this my faith and the mercy of God to me a share Sect. 9. Of Prayer upon such Fasting dayes THat which will much heighten my affection in this my repentance and further complete all its parts yet remains to wit prayer which as it must on this occasion and day be more large and particular than ordinary so I cannot now want matter for it after such consideration of my condition and of the way how I am to seek for pardon of sin as is supposed if the former rules have been observed to have foregone particularly I am to frame my prayers or at least to alter them as neer as I can to my condition 1. Confessing my several sins and that not without those aggravating circumstances in which I formerly considered them 2. Representing before God my sorrow my resolution of heart against them 3. Begging his grace to assist me in the fulfilling my godly purposes and pardon for all my sins whether known and confessed or as yet unknown to me To these heads my Christian discretion may add more according to my particular condition To wit if any judgment rest on me or mine or is feared by reason of these my sins I may implore deliverance from it If any mercy is expected or by me aimed at which I fear my sins may most justly hinder or blast I may importune God for the granting it or otherwise apply my self as occasion serves Now as to the form or outward manner of my prayer if I am able to pray otherwise I shall not haply on these occasions see it alwaies fit or convenient to use set or composed forms for that there may be many particular affecting circumstances of my sins which no form will express so plainly as I have need to express them for the moving my sorrow If therefore I find my heart ready and so composed that I dare venture upon what we call a conceived prayer which being of mine own invention by the assistance of the Spirit may more perfectly suit with my condition in all than one framed by another to my hand having either noted in a paper before me the substance or matter of my Confessions Petitions and Thanksgiving which paper for memories sake I lay before me when I kneel down to prayer oâ— else so considered of as that it will be ready I may spend a few thoughts touching the particular expressions by which I intend to represent this my mind to God To this purpose these two practices may be helpfull 1. To read any part of the woâ—d of God which being I dayly read some of it I may know to be suitable to my present case If I find mine heart hard let me read some affecting working place Such I may be presumed to have noted as I have read in my course If I find it tender let me read such place or places as may nourish this tenderness or raise me to to an holy joy and delight in God and these duties which I perform to him And in like manner in other cases 2. To recall and consider such fit expressions of the particular materials which I am to set forth before God as I may be presumed to have observed and treasured up in my memory or book in my ordinary course of reading After such premeditation with an holy fear I am to endeavour to pour out my inward conceptions before God as fitly and as fervently as I can But I must not think that fervency lies in loud speaking but in the inward affection of the soul notwithstanding if my closet be so situate that I may judge I cannot be heard without I may many times find that it will conduce if not to the affecting me more yet to the keeping my mind more close to my business for me to speak in a voice exceeding a private whisper But let me be never so able a person and my heart never so fixt to use a form so far as where occasion shall serve to leave it a while to wit where I would confess or ask more particularly may keep my prayers from being loose imperfect broken and disorderly and consequently make my devotions riper Now such an one is this which followes O Thou Great Holy and Fearful God unto whom all things are naked and open and before whom as being of purer eyes than to behold iniquity nothing that is unrighteous shall stand I even blush and dread to appear before thee For in me there is nothing but iniquity that thou canst behold Iniquity indeed is too soft a word I am nothing but filth I have sinned against Heaven and before thee and am so far unworthy of being called thy son that I am not fit to be called thy servant but deserve rather as a rebell as a faithless and treacherous wretch against thy Majesty to be destroyed of the Destroyer to have all thy wrath and plagues to meet in me and to be made unto the world an example of thy severity and revenging justice that by me men might learn no more to presume and backslide But there is mercy with thee O Lord that thou mayest be feared and sought unto Nor hast thou as thou hast protested any pleasure in the death of sinners but art so desirous that they might return and be healed that thou hast not spared thy very onely begotten Son but hast given him to seek and by death it self to save the lost sons of men promising that of all those who through him come home unto thee thou wilt by no means cast off any I come O Lord at least I have here set my self in the way to come and bewail my departures And let not my Lord be angry and I will consess I have O God a most corrupt nature and heart full of impurities and abominable things as a cage of unclean birds She was innocent in comparison of me out of whom came but seven devils I may most truly stile my self Legion such swarmes of lusts do possess me The Wheresoever in this prayer the mark †is found the Reader must not forgot to consider particularly touching those expressions whether they fit his condition lusts of the flesh †Intemperance Idleness Uncleanness the lusts of the eyes †Covetousness Envy the Pride of life †conceitedness of my self Ambition and proud Wrath are things familiar to me rooted and grounded in my heart And that truly Lord not so much by nature as by continued custome and wicked practice I have my self made my soul more depraved than I ever received it from corrupt nature That I am dull and heartless in the performance of all holy duties that I am vigorous and active in the serving my lusts and pleasures and the fulfilling the desires of my flesh and mind that I am vain heedless and
possible that such a backsliding wretch as my self should ever be renewed again unto repentance or thereby restored But forasmuch as I understand that to turn thus desperate and to neglect repentance and amendment of life would be worse than all the wickedness which I have hitherto wrought I am here prostrate before thee to bewail my self and with sorrow and grief of heart for my former wayes do I here cast my self upon thee If thou wilt have mercy thou canst still save me If thou wilt not Lord I perish But doest thou use to suffer those to perish who thus with such repentance as they can submit and humble themselves at thy footstool crying unto thee for help Far be it from thee thou Father of Mercies Notwithstanding inasmuch as I being much worse than ordinary sinners do more justly deserve to find no place for repentance and have therefore more reason to fear how thou maist deal with me deal with me as thou wilt †through thy grace I will sin no more no more knowingly and presumptuously as I have done And to that end I have here in thy presence this day considered my wayes †I have endeavoured to find out those wiles and methods by which the Devil and mine own lusts have ensnared me in such grievous sins †I have resolved upon impartial diligence as well in my endeavours against these particular evils as against all other and in performing unto thee hearty and intire obedience These Resolutions I here humbly present before thee sacredly engaging my self to do my utmost to keep them and beseeching thee by thy grace to engage my heart more firmly to them And Lord let not any dulness or want of that affection with which I ought to have confessed my sins to have bewailed my guilt and to have passed these resolutions hinder that this my serious humiliation of my self should not be accepted before thee Such contrition as thou hast enabled me to I have endeavoured sorrowing that I am not more deeply humbled Such which is wanting do thou bestow For it is no less thy property to bestow than to accept the contrite heart The broken spirit is O Lord from thee When thou of old commandedst water out of the flinty Rock it forthwith yielded obedient streams nor can my heart dry and hard as it is but dissolve into holy tears if thou wilt bid it melt Give forth then the word O God Speak thy servant is here ready to hear Turn thou me and I shall be turned Send out thy good Spirit let it inlighten the eyes of my mind in the knowledge both of my self and thee let it savingly perswade me of the truth of all that thou hast spoken and especially of the defiling cursed and damning nature of sin of the sufficiency and efficacy of the merits of Christ Jesus unto all those who by a right faith apply themselves to thee through him I do O Lord believe help my unbelief And grant that this sight and perswasion both of my sin and Saviour may affect mine heart so that I may sorrow after a godly sort and that sorrow may bring forth in me those wholesome fruits which after all my endeavours of repentance I cannot but lament to be much wanting in me to wit carefulness against sin vehement desire and zeal of holiness indignation and an holy revenge against my self by all which I may for the future clear my self and ever approve mine heart honest upright and sincere before thee Suffer not this my righteousness to be onely as a morning cloud or early dew soon passing away but let thy grace alwayes dwelling in me keep open in my soul an ever flowing fountain of such penitence that I may go on thus mourning to mourn over my sins and perfecting holiness in thy fear accounting all little enough if so be I may but in the end obtain mercy And this my penitent return at least hearty endeavour of such return accompanied with persevering study of impartial obedience to thee do thou however most unworthy in it self through the perfect merits of thy Son accept washing away all my sins both the iniquities of my youth and transgressions of my riper years as well known as unknown especially Here mention thy chiefest sin or sins my ** in his bloud and reckoning according to thy gracious Covenant this my faith which by such works as these shall discover it self to be alive and true unto me for righteousness And if thine infinite Wisdome shall see it to be good for me do thou grant me this further happiness that I thus living in thy fear may be ever filled with peace and joy through a comfortable assurance of thy favour and hopes of eternal glory As to all my outward affaires by thy good providence be thou pleased so to overrule all events that whatsoever befals me may work together to me for good My sins indeed O Lord deserve quite contrary even the severest inflictions of thy wrath and fiery displeasure And I do most seriously acknowledge that in all the judgments which thou hast at any time laid upon me thou hast used much mercy All the paines which my body hath felt all the losses which have impaired my estate all the slanders which have blasted my name particularly ** I embrace as infinitely less than my deserts That †I am in any straits ** that I Here mention any particular afflictions suffer otherwise in my body relations c. ** were all a thousand sold to what it is I should confess it to be most just Were I to enjoy no more good than I do deserve I should have just nothing Righteous therefore art thou O Lord when I plead with thee Yet if thou wilt be intreated by thy repenting servant to †withdraw * These and such like expressions are to be used according to persons particular conditions or withhold thy hand to remove the punishment I feel or not to inflict the punishments which I fear but through the bloud of Christ to deliver me from thy present wrath as well as from the wrath to come thy servant shall ever bless and praise thee and be able to serve thee with more chearful diligence However Lord thy Will be done Bring me surely to thy self let it be by what means thou wilt Please thy self thy servant will endeavour to be content Deny me what things thou wilt onely deny me not Grace Pardon and thy Self And not onely upon me O Lord but upon all men do thou have mercy according to the gracious pleasure of thine own most holy Will Especially upon the universal Church Enlarge thou its bounds provide for its safety and purity delivering any part of it which is in danger and reforming whatsoever of it is corrupted Do thou with all suitable mercies bless this particular Church Forgive the publick sinnes ** Heal the publick Here mention such sins or calamities Calamities ** Preserve and every way be gracious unto
are not new but have been and alwayes will be the same and multitude of books do but confound plain heads All wise men know that to make a mans self master of one good book is better than to have slightly read an hundred which were not either throughly understood or digested To keep therefore thus to one good Book which may instruct me of the sum of my Christian duty till I have fully made it mine own is my most edisying course Sect. 3 Of Self-examination and the view of our life THis my Exercise of reading being over it will be seasonable now to fall to the examination of my self touching my sins And here I shall find a very good help of the former work of reading especially after some considerable use of it when I am once come to know my several duties for certain it is No man can see what he hath done amiss what he hath left undone which two heads of Omission and Commission contain under them all actual sins till he seeth what he should have done Now this duty of Self-examination a man may be supposed either to be a stranger in and little to have practised or else to have been much in it and to be throughly verst in his heart and life He who is a stranger to it hath unquestionably more work to do than the other That he may therefore do his business throughly he must begin with those very first years which he can remember and trace sin from his insancy through his youth to his riper and present years He must see what Devil first entred him I mean what sins first seized him how they have grown up and continued with him but this will be too long a work for an hour or two Such a person therefore had need to set apart whole dayes for this purpose till he hath a little recovered himself and set his accounts straiter with God Yet must he not while he is enquiring after unknown or forgotten sins neglect to repent of his fresher and known transgressions If therefore so it is that for the present he cannot recollect himself and make a diligent search into the whole course of his life yet must he confess and bewail what he knows of himself and together acknowledge how much he is in arrears which he hath forgotten or at present doth not see and for all humbly beg mercy But this not so as wholly to put off surther enquiry but having this Fast examined himself touching so many years or moneths according as his life finds his thoughts work upon his next Fast proceed farther and so on the next still farther till he come home to his present age Now in this sifting of my life if I can it will be very useful to me and much further a distinct Repentance to use my Pen and through each year set down my sins By this means I shall be able much better to consider them and so both know more of my self and of the deceitful wayes which sin hath to gain upon me And because as I owe to God Confession and repentance of my sins so I owe also acknowledgment and thanks for his Mercies therefore in this enquiry it will be necessary to observe Gods remarkable Mercies and deliverances to me recording these also year by year as my sins Thus will the sight of his Mercies aggravate my sins and encrease my repentance and the sight of my sins parallel with his mercies commend his goodness and inhance my thankfulness both which are singular benefits And because even afflictions have their use and are to be accounted for if therefore I find any considerable adversity or cross with which God hath exercised me this also is to be registred as the former If it did me good I owe to God thanks for it if not I owe repentance for being incorrigible Being thus come to my present time it will become me not to run in arrears again but every â—ast day still to make my accounts even and to that purpose to take care as aforesaid that these my Fasts be not too seldome Supposing therefore that I am a person who have so far practised self examination as that I have formerly taken account of all my life That which I shall have chiefly to enquire into upon each return of these my fasting dayes will be First What new sins or commissions I have been guilty of since my last day of accounting Secondly What neglects especially if I have formerly made any vows or new engagements to God how I have observed or slighted them Thirdly In what posture or temper my heart hath continued and at present is whether soft tender penitent and in awe of God or whether dull careless insensible or otherwise out of order and prone to its old lusts Lastly How the providences of God have carried towards me sithence what mercies received what afflictions sent upon me and what hath been my carriage answerably And whatever I find more remarkable let it be registred in mine Accomptal so I call that paper book in which I use to keep account of my life and spiritual state whereof as is abovesaid I shall find singular advantage in my succeeding time Sect. 4. Of the endeavour of godly sorrow How to work our selves to it SIn is not such a thing the knowledge of which is desirable for it self but onely in order to somewhat else which it is apt to beget to wit Godly sorrow and Repentance My sins therefore being thus known I am to set my self about the sorrowing for them and repenting of them And to godly sorrow the readiest course will be more fully to fix my thoughts upon the sins of which in my examination of my self I have found my self guilty to look upon them so as that mine eye may affect my heart my attent consideration of them may move and grieve me as it ought To this purpose I am to consider particularly First the foulness of my particular sins in themselves and in their own nature how vile they make me how unable I should be to look men in the face if they knew all these unworthy acts by me which I do of my self and God far better than my self how vile therefore must they needs render me in his holy Eye Secondly The several Aggravations which they admit the chief of which and those which are aptest to affect me I may take to be those which follow 1. Against how great light and how clear knowledge of Gods will I have sinned I knew such and such actions to be sinful when yet I ventured upon them 2. Against how many checks of conscience I committed them Did not my own heart at that very instant smite me telling me of the wrath of God and eternal flames belonging to those who do such things 3. Against how many engagements and obligations to the contrary have I sinned 1. My own vows and covenant both in baptisme and since 2. Gods mercies and forbearance which should
have invited and lead me to repentance 3. Gods judgments and heavy hand many times upon me which should have taught me righteousness 4. Had I no hinderances in the way which I broke through It may be Gods holy providence cast somewhat in which did a while retard my commission of the sin and if I had not been lesperately bent upon it might have diverted me and dasht the temptation 4. Was not I the tempter and Devil to my self in them Did not I set my self on work without Saâ—ans incitation of me thereto 5. Whether or no have not many of them been publickly dishonourable to God and scandalous to my Christian profession Hath not mine example if not mine enticements drawn in others to the same sin or driven others out of conceit with Religion Wretched man that I am that I should so hold perhaps teach the faith as to make infidels Lastly Something of grievousness the circumstances of time and Place c. may add thereto which ought not to be overlooked Through such heads as these should I trace my sins especially those of them which are most gross and in my Meditations dwell so upon these considerations as may if possible move my sorrow at least breed an utter â—aversion of the sin and a loathing of my self for it And if it be so that I cannot shed tears and really mourn over my sins yet if I can find in my self a through displeasure with my self for sin and an hatred of it together with an earnest desire to be freed from the habit and power of the sin as well as from the guilt of it this I may conclude to be a sorrow of mind and ought therefore to cherish in my soul Sect. 5. Of Repentance which is the effect of godly sorrow its true nature and way of practice THe Apostle saith Godly sorrow workith repentance which need not to be repented of Now that repentance may seem to consist of two things Of a full purpose of heart to forsake sin and of hearty endeavours against it First I say I may not think I have repented of my sin till I have taken up a full purpose and resolution of mind against it for the future As long as there is in me any intention of returning to it again I am an impenitent wretch Now such purpose and resolution the foregoing consideration of my sin is apt to beget and therefore by laying such thoughts truly home unto mine heart by employing my mind much on them I ought to endeavour to work my self up to such resolution and never to sit down contented or think my self penitent till I am so wrought upon I shall not much need to be minded that during such endeavours I ought to intermix with my meditations frequent petitions to Almighty God whose Grace onely it is which is sufficient for me for the turning my heart from sin Now purposes and resolutions are rotten except endeavours to fulfil them follow This therefore is the second part of repentance that as I have resolved so I endeavour against sin And this endeavour against sin seems to have two parts the one of which may best be acted in my Closet the other must be acted any where and every where The first part of the endeavour against sin is to do what we can to mortifie the habit that is the inclination readiness and customary proneness which we have to the sin which is to be forsaken And that must be done 1. By considering with my self what means or remedies I can find out against that sin Certain it is the more I can restrain or keep back my self from the actual commission or doing of any sin the more will the power of that sin decay in me the less inclined shall I be thereto Wherefore if I cannot at the first root out the habit or overcome that miserable inclinedness which I find thereto yet let me endeavour to find out such means which may keep me from the acting the sin and I say that customary proneness unto the sin will by the grace of God decay Now in general it will be a true and proper remedy against any sin to consider the occasions or inducements which chieflly lead me thereunto and to provide as well as I can against them Whether or no is it a sin which is deeply rooted in my nature and constitution or whether or no is it such an one which by my way of living converse and custome I have settled in my self If it be of the latter sort the breaking my self of that custome the altering as far as is possible such converse as hath brought me into it is a very good remedy against it But if it be a sin innate and after a sort planted in my very make and complexion it is more difficult to subdue But the way will be 1. To take such course with my self as that for the future I may keep my self from the acting of it as much as may be And 2. To make it a constant petition in my daily prayers to God that he by that Spirit by which he is able to subdue all things unto himself would mortifie in me the affection and lust which I have after that sin And by persevering in such course no doubt but at length through the divine Grace I shall overcome it These means therefore having consulted of attending to my particular sin the next step which I am to take in the mortifying of it is 2. To resolve there before God diligently to use those means which I have particularly consulted of and so forthwith to order and contrive all my affairs as far as in me lies that I may without any partiality use them all according to the best of my skill and in the most effectual manner that I know The second part of the endeavour against sin which will not be so much the work of my Closet as of my life is diligence in the using of these means which I have thus considered of found out and resolved upon whereever I am and when soever I have opportunity Now that I may so do it will very much help if I write down these resolutions before God in my privacy which I am to do in mine Accomptal where also I am to record every dayes fasting and the issue thereof what I found new in mine estate what I resolved on what means I considered of against such and such sins We find they not onely made a Covenant but put it in writing and sealed it before the Lord in their solemn Fast Nehem. 9. 38. This will be one way to secure me against being slighty in my Penitentials and it may besides much both confirm and quicken me in my execution of these my resolves to read them over written by my mine own hand before God And being thus registred it will be good for me to be often when I come into my Closet about my devotions and examine my self looking on and reading them over least
that my sin Now the consideration how this restitution or reconcilement may be made and the Resolution to make it may be best done in my Closet and such consultation and resolution deserves a place to be registred amongst my other penitential devotions upon the same reasons as they do These rules in my repentance if I have observed though I cannot look upon any action of mine as compleat yet I may have hope I have not herein been slighty but that God through Christ Jesus will accept it Sect. 8. Of that faith which is requisite in order to pardon of sin BEsides Repentance it is commonly said that God requireth Faith of us in order to pardon of our sins and it is most certain if we understand faith as we ought But it is as certain that people are ordinarily very much mistaken in the nature of Faith as it is not unusual for us to be in such things the names whereof are takne in such different Dr. Ham. Pract. Catech. Lib. 1. Sect. 3. senses as the name of Faith is in Scripture Now faith we all of us know signifies Belief and therein doth the nature of it lye Him that we believe in is God that which we believe is his Word So then Faith is a full belief or credence of the whole Word of God and especially of the Gospel a receiving it and every part of it in a way suitable to the matter of it agreeing to whatever is therein affirmed as being true believing all the promises that God will never fail on his part unless we do on ours setting our selves to fulfil all the commands as believing all that is commanded to be our duty and of indispensible necessity to salvation trembling at all the threatnings as being perswaded God will be as good as his word and punish all impenitent sinners Faith I say is the hearty and sincere embracing and being perswaded of the whole word and these its parts after this sort and we must not single out the promises and believe them alone for all commands and threats are no less the word of God than are the promises and therefore must be as much believed nor shall any one ever be justified who doth not thus believe If it be asked whether it be not faith in the free promises of the Gospel or a trusting to God through Christ that he will pardon my sin which doth chiefly justifie me I say No and that the embracing the doctrine of the Gospel the receiving every command and threat so deeply into my heart as that the belief of the one turns forthwith into obedience and of the other into obedience and of the other into an holy fear which are the other parts of faith cannot be conceived to be either in their own nature inferiour unto that trust or less either valued or required by God I do not say that God accepts of any of them or all of them for their worth He accepts of them and of the person in whom they are purely through Christ through his merits doth he impute this faith to such person for righteousness that is reckon and accept of this his cordial and impartial receiving his whole Gospel after this sort as well as if he had performed perfect and unsinning obedience as he was first bound but this I say and that upon the evidence already hinted that justification or the pardoning of sin is no more appropriated to that one act of faith which we call trust than to those other and that I cannot if comparison in this case be made but account those other acts that impartial submitting and devoting the sould to obedience answerably to every command that true resting in the fear of God as the more principal worthy and I am sure less to be suspected acts of faith At the least I cannot conceive what we call a justifying faith to proceed any otherwise than as follows First I do believe the promise of pardon of sin to be true and God to be faithful and that without all doubt God will not fail on his part except I fail on mine God will not fail to give the promised blessing if I fail not to perform the condition upon which he hath promised it Secondly I therefore forthwith set my self about the condition or duty required as I expect the blessing or promised mercy from God I sorrow for my sins I endeavour amendment of life I cleave unto God with full purpose of impartial obedience Thirdly having done so I do not believe that all this is worth any thing in it self but that it is through the meer grace of God in Christ Jesus that I must be accepted pardoned and saved Wherefore I trust to God according to his promise the condition of which I have â—ndeavoured to fulfil that he will through Christ pardon all my sins and reckon this my faith to me for righteousness to trust for the pardoning of my sins upon any oâ—her terms is unbelief and presumption for it is a believing God will pardon my sins upon their terms than he hath said he would ever pardon sin and that is a believing God will be false But now let the case be put that some grievous sinner much humbled under the sense of his notorious wickedness doth as beforesaid believe the promise to be true as it is set himself about the fulfilling its condition sorrowing repenting c. believe all that he doth to be in its self worth nothing but yet Christs merits to be of infinite worth through which notwithstanding he dare not trust for the pardon of his sins as remembring them to be so great and doubting lest he hath not yet performed the condition which the promise of the pardon of sin through Christs merits requires and in this temper dies Put I say this case shall we think this man hath not a true and justifying faith He hath surely and it may be a truer faith than hath many an one who yet hath more of the trust But yet it is evident he hath not this trust for he durst not through sense of his own unworthiness animate himself thereto Seeing therefore that it is very possible a man may in such case be justified without that act of faith I conclude that justification is not appropriate unto it that is that a trusting in God that he through Christ will pardon my sin is not that act of faith which chiefly justifies me and that they are very much mistaken who take this by it self to be the true nature of justifying faith that they believe God will pardon their sin for Christs sake so then I now see the course which I am to take in my humiliation to sue out the pardon of my sin I am to believe that God will not fail on his part if I do fail on mine I am therefore to repent of my sins as before I have been taught and persist in amendment of life all the while trusting in the grace of God