came to see my need of Christ and to be satisfied that a single Christ would be of more worth than ten thousand Worlds and these were the Texts of Scripture that did much revive me viz. That Christ Jesus came into the World to save Sinners and that the Gospel-Tenders of him was to such And that the Covenant-Terms of Salvation were attainable thrô assisting Grace Isai 1. 18. Come now let 's reason together saith the Lord Though your Sins be as Scarlet they shall be white as Snow and though they be red as Crimson they shall be as Wool O what Encouragement is here thought I for me a Sinner who though but young in Years was yet old in Sin And another encouraging Scripture I often thought on was Prov. 28. 13. He that confesses and forsakes his Sin shall find Mercy And Isai 55. 7. Let the Wicked for sake his Way and the unrighteous Man his Thoughts and let him turn unto the Lord and he will have Mercy upon him and to our God for he will abundantly pardon I then to encourage my return to God and the forsaking of my Sins thought of the great Sinners that had obtain'd Mercy such as Manasseh Mary Magdalen and some of the very Jews that had been guilty of the Blood of Christ and had murdered the Son of God yet through Repentance and Faith in Christ many of them were pardoned and saved nay Paul that eminent Pattern of God's free Grace to great Sinners and David and others of God's Dear Children that had foully faln was Encouragement to me a Prodigal now to arise and go to my Father Now I began to set upon a Course of Duties which when I found I was pretty strict in the performance of I begun too much to rest upon them Now I was for believing but hardly knew how to believe that Christ died for Sinners so as to throw my self and rest wholly upon him and to think my Tears and Prayers and other Duties will do me no good in point of Justification When I had served in my Apprenticeship about four Years my eldest Brother Cornelius being dead some short time before it pleasing the Lord to visit the City with the Plague which began in the Street in which I lived upon which my Father prevailed with my Master to give me leave to retire into the Country to him during that Visitation Accordingly I came down in the Year 1665 to my Father's House then at Swinder by And then began other Sins to appear in me as the product or Remainders of Corruption in my Nature I have great cause to bewail and lament that proud Garb I came from London in having I do believe expended as much for one Sute of Clothes as would have clothed compleatly 40 poor Servants of Jesus Christ For which Equipage I contracted much Debt in London which my Father after paid I had then so proud an Humour that I thought this Dress thô excessively Gaudy was but suitable to my Rank thô alas much beyond it This Vanity I can hardly think of without Blushing Yet now living an idle Life and being dreadfully puft up with Pride tho alas alas I had nothing in the World to be proud of but rather to be humbled for I presently was under Temptation to think that I must now carry it out and live at the Rate of my Father's Eldest Son and not as Mr. Oglethorp's Apprentice and Servant Now it was that tho indeed I durst not much associate with wicked Companions that were Strangers tho Neighbours to me yet I did it too much with those that were Relations and thought that Relation would justify that practice not considering the Snares of it I there made too many sinful Slips went often to Norton and Norwell where I met with such Company as had not Free-Grace sustained me had certainly ruined me both as to my Principles and Practices There it was I fell to the Practice of good Fellowship most undeservedly so called and then have been perswaded to think that time well spent could sometimes most wickedly triumph in my Ability to bear strong Drink not considering the sad Woe in Scripture denounced against such At that time I learn'd to drink and game and smoak Tobacco and trifle c. and spent by Perswasion of others tho my bad Heart was most to blame not only Days but Nights in those kind of Excesses And here I cannot but observe how unwilling the Devil was to lose me who so lately had been his Prey and led captive by him at his pleasure But yet after these Relapses for ever magnified be distinguishing Love the Lord graciously gave me a Check and after some Reproofs and Advice from Parents and serious Friends I again begun to consider my Ways Conscience was startled and begun to do the Office of a faithful Monitor And this Scripture was often in my Thoughts and sounded terribly in mine Ears He that being often reproved and hardeneth his Heart shall suddenly be destroyed and that without Remedy Much precious Time I did waste and trifle away in those Days in sinful Delights and Pleasures the want of which I now sadly experience Several Gentlewomen one after another I courted being invited thereto by one Friend or other and too many of my Addresses of that Nature were too extravagant inconsiderate and sinful which the Lord has humbled me much for since From Swinderby I went to Barkston with my Father and his Family who went to settle there for the sake of Mr. Trott the Minister of that Town and a worthy good Man whilst there I went sometimes to Grantham to hear some Non-Conformist Ministers as there was opportunity for their Preaching which was but seldom much Soul-advantage I received then through the Lord's Blessing upon Mr. Sharp's Ministry who was then a Non-Conformist of very great Note After this my Father buying a House at Lincoln we removed to it and thither the Lord in his Providence sent holy humble and worthy Mr. Abdy to be Pastor of that Congregation for which he had Liberty by the King's Proclamation and Licence of Indulgence Here I delighted greatly to attend upon those Ordinances through God's Blessing upon which and an intimate Correspondence I held with him I received much benefit Then began I in good earnest to set my Face Heaven-ward and to mind the great Work the Lord sent me into and continued me in the World about Now began I not only to observe my private Retirements for Prayer but to pray in my Father's Family tho too hypocritically in those my first Attempts I have cause enough to believe However having cast a Look Heaven-wards Hell was presently in an Uproar the Devil storms at it my old Companions begin to upbraid me for it which yet the Lord gave me Grace to bear with Patience as knowing that I had much better bear and endure the Frowns of wicked Men for being Religious than the everlasting Frowns of the great God for not
me I am out of Hell I am out of a Prison I am not as lately flying before pursuing Enemies nor absenting my self for Security from my own House I am not made a Prey to Enemies but the Lord has dealt bountifully with me What shall I render unto the Lord Some following Days after I took notice of sinful Thoughts idle Words unbecoming Actions and of the Lord's Goodness in sparing Mercy Nov. 7. 1685. I bless God then for returning me in Safety from my Yorkshire Journey and that I saw my Friends with Comfort and found all well at my return home then I petitioned the Lord to continue Enjoyments to me and mine 8th This God made a comfortable Sabbath Mr. Coats preached excellently from this Text Remember now thy Creator c. the Lord do me and all that heard him good by his blessing upon that Ordinance and pardon Sin the Morning as soon as I awakened I was full of projecting carnal melancholy Thoughts O sad Thoughts for a Sabbath-Day God seal a Pardon to me 10th This Evening being Tuesday by 7 of the Clock I set apart some Hours for Humiliation that Night with the help of Mr. B. Mr. C. c. and about half an hour after 12 a Clock I ended in that Work in my Closet the Sins I bewailed particularly was my not keeping Covenant and Promise with my God Passion with my Wife Pride Slightness in Duties especially Closet-Duties c. 15th I enjoy'd a most comfortable Sabbath by Mr. Coats's Help who preach'd from these words Remember now thy Creator c. and this Passage I took particular notice of That where Youth has been devoted to God reviews of it in old Age when Persons are less capacitated for Duty-Frames will afford sweet Comfort and Refreshing 22d This a comfortable Sabbath God bless it to me Mr. Cl. preach'd from these words Ps 67. That God even our own God shall bless us The Doct. was It 's a most desirable thing for People to have a God of their own These Marks he laid down which I desire often to peruse and examine my self by by which I may know whether God be my God or no. 1. If I have a God of my own I get what Knowledg I can of my God 2. I get what Love I can to my God 3. I would be loth to do that which this my God may take ill 4. I would then serve no God but my own God and never fall down to Graven-Images 5. I would take nothing ill from my own God 6. I would love to think of him 7. I would love to be speaking of him 8. I could love to have my own God well spoken of 9. I would often send to him and hear from him 10. I desire nothing more than while i 'm absent from him that this God would visit me by his Spirit 11. I would not live always here but die to go to this my own God and to be with him for ever And these are the earnest Requests of my Soul Several Days together I find a comfortable Account both as to freedom from Sins and great Mercies But on the 28th I find Relapses into Sin and that which aggravates it much is I was just writing the Account of my Life And O what a Mercy it is God has given me not only space for but the Grace of Repentence Decemb. 12. Hitherto much the like Account the Lord has preserved my Liberty beyond expectation and prevented my entring into ensnaring Bonds 14th I took notice of Mercy shew'd my Wife in delivering her from most acute Pains in the Tooth-Acâ— Jan. 2. â—â—8â— I this Day returned from a great Journey in which the Lord wonderfully succeded me in all my Affairs and preserv'd me from all Dangeâ—… I experienc'd Mercy in the kind Reception the D. of N. gave me on Monday to his House whither I went to return him Thanks for his Civility to me He told me I came to him on a very proper Day being Innocents-Day for that he believed I was so in the Matters laid to my charge and that he had now done with me and should as Opportunity offer'd readily serve me in any thing He desired me to be kind to my Uncle L who had taken great pains on my behalf I gave him thereupon over and above other Kindness before Here 's now a return to Prayer God help me to improve so great Mercy Passages a little before the Death of my Dear Wife and about her Sickness and Death May 13 1686. I met with Stops as to my London Journey by Business and my Dear Wife's Illness for this very Day in the Morning she was ev'n spent with a Conghing-Fit I was called from Prayer in my Family found her very Ill but blessed be God soon grew better and told me I bless God I am now pretty well Now I was earnest with the Lord that he would enable me to observe the Hints of Providence in my being stopt several times and my way to London as it were hedged up May 17 1686. I set forward for London notwithstanding the Cross Providences I met with a great Change in the Weather divers times a Cold that I had upon me a grievous Fit of the Asthma my dear Wife had insomuch as I plainly observ'd Providence against me as to that Journey at that time but notwithstanding upon Encouragement from my Wife that if I must needs go this Summer which she rather desired I would not because of Souldiers being much upon the Road going to the Camp I had as good go now as any other time I did set forward and part with my dear Wife this Day but never saw her more The Lord knows my Carriage at London was too light and vain I wonder'd I heard nothing from Ollercarr waited a Fortnight for Letters and did my self write several but through their miscarriage and as the Lord pleased to order it I received four all of a day most of which brought me the sad Tidings of my dear Wife's Death which was aggravated greatly in that I had not heard of her Illness till I heard of her Death and all came in Letters to me at London at which time I had one under my Wife's Hand to acquaint me with her late Illness but that blessed be God she was better an Account of which here follows after I have given first an Account of mine just sending to the Post directed to her at that very instant when I received this that follows A Copy of my Letter the Last I ever writ or must write to my Dear Wife now I trust with God My Dearest I Am in great expectation of Nanny's coming up to London according to the Desire of my last which Business now only stays me in Town Thou canst not imagine how much I am concerned at thy silence or at least thy Letters Miscarriage I having not received one Letter from thee since I left thee this being I think the fourth that I have
Riper-years of lost Time in Youth will prove sad and cost dear and be assured that Time 's lost that 's spent either in Eating Drinking Sleeping Visiting or Sportings more than Necessity requires 13. If the Lord should again make thee Head of a Family and bless thee with Children as well as Servants take care of their Souls train them up for God and let thy House be a Nursery for Heaven take an account every Week of their Proficiency in Spirituals and always esteem of those Children and Servants most that love fear and serve God best Travel in Birth to see Christ formed in thine and know that if any go from thy House to Hell through thy neglect their Souls will be required at thy Hands 14. Make Religion thy Business and always account the serving of God and the saving thy Soul to be the greatest Work thou art sent into the World about and continued in the World for give not Christ the World's leavings much rather let the World have his 15. Get right and well-grounded Evidences for Heaven O lay not a Sandy Foundation for the Building that 's to stand to Eternity 〈…〉 some Evidences for Heaven thou'lt find in the first part of this Treatise others in Rogers's Evidences for Heaven Examine thy State often and impartially and never be satisfied till the Interest betwixt Christ and thy Soul be compleated and cleared up 16. Sit loose from the World and seek not great things for thy self here My Circumstances in the World be such that I cannot leave thee much more than what was setled upon Marriage but all I could I have and a little with the Lord's Blessing is better than the great Revenues of many Wicked Make sure of an Estate in Heaven live much upon Invisibles choose Christ for a Portion and thou art made for ever 17. Be content with thy Condition here whatever 't is and expect Sufferings A Christian's Life here is militant If thou continue to keep thy Face Heavenwards which I trust thou wilt then may the Devil the World and the Flesh be frequently sallying out against thee But O pray that thy Faith fail not and that God's Grace may be sufficient for thee 18. Labour to persevere in the good Ways of God maintain thine Integrity and hold out unto the end whatever it cost thee Be a Follower of those who through Faith and Patience inherit the Promises or Things promised All thy Bitters here will serve to make Heaven more sweet to thee and being Faithful unto Death Christ will give thee a Crown of Life 19. Get off from thine own Bottom place no Confidence in the Flesh look off from thine own Righteousness thine own Duties thine own Services when thou doest the best in point of Justification and depend and rest only on Christ upon whose account alone thou canst be accepted and saved It 's Christ's Righteousness alone imputed to thee for Justification and imparted to thee for thy Sanctification that can or will bestead thee 20. Be rich in good Works and go about doing Good hold on thy Charitable way of doing Good to Bodies but especially befriend poor Souls Be always as kind as thy Circumstances will allow to those worthy good Ministers of the Gospel thou and I were always beholden to and I am perswaded shall be blessing God for as Instruments in his Hand of our Good to Eternity 21. Allow thy self in no Sin for the least Sin loved and allowed is certainly damning When God has at any time convinced thee of a Sin and Conscience has flown in thy Face and thou art full of Terrour go to God down upon thy Knees and beg pardoning Grace and Mercy leave him not till thou hast obtained that Blessing and always have a care of Relapses for though we find a David and Lot and others of the dear Servants of God recorded in Scripture guilty of some great Miscarriages yet we find them sorely broken for those Things and humbled and not repeating and relapsing again into them 22. Prepare for Eternity get and keep Oil in thy Lamp that it be not to buy when thy Lamp should be found burning put on thy Wedding-Garments and be prepared c. 23. Mourn not for me excessively I am gone but thy God and my God stays with thee and I trust will guide thee by his Counsel till he conduct thee to his Glory I am dead but God lives thou hast no Husband on Earth what then If thy Maker be but thy Husband thou hast cause enough to rejoice What though they that have seen me shall in this World see me no more This is my Comfort let it be thine he does see me that has seen though my weak yet my sincere Yernings and Groanings after him he sees me that will never say I know you not being a God that will not forget Covenant he sees me who has seen my Soul in Travel and those Pangs of Desite after him that no others have O'couldst thou but hear what I confidently hope through the Morits and Mediation of my dear Redeemer I shall before thou â—â—est this Paper my God in the Riches of his Mercy saying to this effect Yonder 's poor such a one come to my Gate let him in he chose me for a Portion whilst on Earth and gave himself according to his weak Measures up to me I will in no wise cast him off Surely this would abate thy Sorrows surely then thou wouldst not wish me so Ill as to be on Earth again well live in the Faith of this and walk comfortably with thy God God has made thee indeed whilst on Earth to me the greatest outward blessing that ever I enjoyed O let me not want thy Company in Heaven And now my Dearest on Earth I commit thee to the keeping and Mercy of the Great Jehovah I resign thee to that God who is thy Maker and thy Husband serve him and thy Generation according to his Will here that thou mayest sleep in Jesus and be found in him Gervase Disney POST-SCRIPT OR A Continuation of the most Remarkable Passages of my LIFE since the other the last of June 1686. SINCE my last particular View of my Diary design'd in the Treatise of my Life I find my up's and down's and that I am but a poor vile and weak Creature unable of my self to answer by a holy and humble Carriage the Lord 's great Goodness to me in late signal Deliverances out of Trouble and that upon better Terms than I could expect I was now no sooner at ease and rest thrô the Lord's Mercy and at liberty than I grew secure and begun to be too regardless of Soul-Concerns I too little remembred and considered Promises made when under Affliction and neglected too much to pay those Vows My Circumstances when in Trouble were a Snare to me in some Particulars In my Diary the 19th of September 1685 I find my self blessing God for his Protection and Care of me in my Journey and
her weakness by Asthma and Feaver increasing and prevailing upon her she had some Disturbance by Temptations from Satan that grand Adversary of Souls to question her right to Happiness c. and whether God would accept so vile a Wretch Yet blessed be the Lord through Faith and Prayer and the never-failing Mercies of a Good God she got over all baffled Satan and was filled with unspeakable Joy in the Holy Ghost The Doctor prayed with her and afterward she her self prayed a considerable time distinctly and aloud and for her then Comfort and Support many Passages of Sermons she had heard especially some from Mr. Coates on that Text Come unto me all ye that labour c. came fresh in her Memory which the Lord helped her to improve to the great Comfort and Refreshment of her Soul She was now full of Heavenly Thoughts and from the abundance of her Heart her Mouth was now speaking c. She uttered nothing but what was savoury religious and serious and being spent by great Weakness went triumphantly to Heaven upon the 29th of May 1686. The Doctor told me it was the comfortablest Night that ever he enjoyed in all his Life Here at Leicester worthy Mr. Clarke the Nonconformist waited my coming that he might accompany me to Ollercarr which he did and the Lord made him mighty useful by his Christian advice to me June 3. I got home where I found a most sad and disconsolate Family I that needed others to comfort me was fain to be their Comforter June 5 1686. This Day my Diary manifests that I was grown more calm under the Lord 's mighty Hand and the loss of a Dearest Wife but yet too full of miserable Complaints and quarrelling Thoughts against my Maker the Lord forgive me and compose me for the Duties of the Sabbath following June 6. This Day was a very comfortable Sabbath with reference to my Enjoyments but the want of my Dear Wife occasioned Floods of Tears and violent Passions the Lord pardon my tumultuous Thoughts and in the Multitude of my Thoughts within me let his Comforts more refresh my Spirit June 7. This Day my Dear Wife was Interr'd at Crich where if the Lord please so to order it I desire and intend to lie by her the Lord pardon Sins while I had her and such as I have been most guilty of since I parted with her June 8. This Day through Mercy not much quarrelling with the Lord's Dispensations more calm than I was O that I could be dumb with Silence and not open my Mouth in a fretting and repining way because the Lord has done what 's done unto me the Lord sanctify this sad Breach upon me to my Soul's Good May I remember my Sins that have provoked God and be humbled for them and return to the Lord that smiteth June 9. This Day I find my Heart better fitted and framed to bear this sad Stroke This Day was preach'd by Mr. Coats my Dear Wife's Funeral-Sermon from these words 1 Thess 4. 13. But I would not have you to be ignorant Brethren concerning them which are asleep that ye sorrow not even as others which have no hope Passion in the Sermon I was guilty of when in the Commondatory Part he was shewing what a Wife she was the Lord pardon my unbecoming Carriage to her Several days after I gave account of the Lord 's quieting my Mind under the sad Loss sustain'd June 20. This was a very comfortable Sabbath and the Lord gave me great Delight under the Droppings of the Sanctuary Mr. Coats preach'd from these words Hear the Rod and who hath appointed it O! I would fain make application to my self O that I could hear the Voice of this sad Providence and take out the Lessons of this Rod O that I may carry my self like a Christian under this mighty Hand of God! I have cause to fear I did not improve Last-Summer's Mercies as I ought and God has made this a much more uncomfortable Summer O that as ever I desire the Lord should not go on in this way I may better improve this Dispensation Several Letters I receiv'd from Friends heartily sympathizing with me in my Trouble take the Copies of some of them as follows A Letter from Mr. J. R. dated June 4 1686. Dear Sir BY a Letter I received Yesterday from Mr. Coats I perceive the Letters I sent you in Town on Monday Night were like Job's Messengers one bringing you sad the other sadder News but I hope you receiv'd the News with Job's Temper or mind viz. The Lord gave and the Lord hath taken away blessed be the Name of the Lord and God hath taken away the Delight of your Eyes and removed her out of sight she is in a state of Rest and you must behold her no more among the Inhabitants of the World this must needs be a pressing Affliction to lose so near so dear and so pious a Companion and that which aggravates the Affliction is that she was taken away in your Absence so suddenly and so unexpectedly But Dear Sir though God has crost your Will herein yet I hope a Tumult doth not arise your Passions and Affections are not in an uproar Why shall not God take away his own in his own time way and manner But Sir I am not to teach you God has rarely qualified you with the Graces of his Holy Spirit so that you know how to receive and how to resign a Mercy you know how to add to Faith Patience as you lately heard There is an animal Life of a Soul void of Grace accommodating it self to the Interests of the Flesh to all such things as are grateful to Sense but then there is a Spiritual Life which is a Principle enabling a Soul to bear up when God takes away our greatest Comforts such a Principle there is in you All I have to do is to sympathize with you and to pray that God would afford you more of the Assistances of his Holy Spirit that you may exert that Principle now at this time under this Loss The truth is 't is one of the most lovely Sights in the World to see a Christian acting Faith Patience Humility Submission Resignation c. in times of Affliction this makes the World say that there is something more in Religion than Talk but as I said I am not to teach you You have the teachings of the Spirit which will enable you to improve this Loss to better Gains The Lord sit us all for our last and great Change and in the midst of our private Losses let 's remember the Afflictions of Sion now sitting in the Dust So prays Your Sympathizing Friend and Humble Servant J. R. I hope you will return up again after some Days I think it will be convenient to divert your self with your Friends here some time after you have performed the last Office of Love to your Yoak-Fellow c. A Copy of a Letter from Cos M. S. dated
want and cannot come But here must stay and die Answer I grant O Soul 't is Faith alone That great uniting Grace By which thou must lay hold of Christ The want of it 's thy Case Well Faith 's the Gift of God thou know'st Who biddeth thee believe And true Repentance he must give Or thou canst never live Well coming Sinner come away Be always of this Mind Thou must both knock and call and seek If Mercy thou wouldst find Lord Mercy Lord O poor Soul cry Thy Mercy Lord I crave Or here I die in Misery It 's Mercy I must have I do believe help Vnbelief My hold of Christ I 'le keep If run I cannot after thee Lord after thee I 'le creep Then Welcome Sinner unto Christ Though coming for a Dole This Faith though weak yet saving is Thy Faith hath made thee whole Backsliding Sinner come to Christ Do but for this Sin mourn And thou 'lt be welcome unto him Who bids repent and turn Relapsing Sinner come away And thou shalt quickly see Thy frequent Fall's no let at all To Christ's accepting thee Delaying Sinner hasten now Before the Door be shut He that says Come will make thee room Then Sinner arise up The hung'ring Soul may come to Christ And they that weary be The Poor that has no Price to pay May have him very free Debauched Sinner hasten in Cast off thy Sins and then He will be thine as well as mine Who di'd for th' worst of Men. Drunkards and Swearers stay not out If you 'l but come in now Such have been wash'd and cleansed too And coming so mayst thou Soul O I am fully now convinc'd If happy I would be I must away to Jesus Christ My Loit'ring ruines me Object But when I come the Devil calls Whither away so fast Thou canst no Entertainment have With Christ thy Time is past Thou art not one of those alas For whom he shed his Blood Nor art thou an elected one Stay here it is as good Soul Nay but I 'le try and hasten in O that I 'd gone before And if I cannot entrance have I 'le wait at Heaven's Door But yet methinks thy fierce Assaults Encouragement do give If I but go I' st be receiv'd And if I turn I' st live The dying Soul's last Farewel to All. FArewel the World I once did love I now have learn'd to live above Farewel my Friends and welcom Grave I better Friends in Heaven have Farewel dear Wife I cannot stay Christ bids me come I must away Farewel my Body made of Dust I must to him in whom I trust Farewel those Sins I left before I 'm going where I 'll sin no more And farewel Troubles at Decease In Heaven will be perfect Peace Farewel my earthly House and Lands A House I 'll have not made with Hands Farewel all Sorrows doleful Cries In Heaven are no weeping Eyes Nay farewel all my worldly Stuff A single Christ makes rich enough To let all go is surely best To enter on Eternal Rest Yet do not say that I am dead I 'm but undrest and gone to Bed I 'm gone you see yet do not cry Meet me in Heaven when you die The Welcom to Heaven God WElcom my Child to endless Bliss Heav'n joys to see thee here Fear not this is thy Father's House Taste freely Heaven's Chear When thou thy Saviour did'st accept This Jointure he thee made It 's Heaven he purchas'd for thee Accept be not afraid But why asham'd poor Soul come in Now thou' rt arriv'd above Thy Soul is cleans'd thy Sins forgot Think now of nought but Love Spread out the Cloth of richest Gold His Foot-cloth it shall be If he be drest then bring him forth He 'll keep me Company Come all that here attend my Throne Put on him best Attire Set on the Crown that will out shine The clearest Flames of Fire Well bid him welcom to the Court He 's one of Royal Birth I must be-friend him now he 's here He was my Friend on Earth He left the World whilst in the World Did show whilst he had Breath He loved me above the World Was faithful unto Death Soul A Bride a Child a Wife a Friend Ragg'd yet adorn'd so soon My Dunghil's changed for a Throne My Midnight's turn'd to Noon Vpon a Death-bed I did lie And there did toss and turn My Friends about me weeping stood But here shall never mourn A Hymn on Isaiah 8. 17. And I will wait upon the Lord that hideth his Face from the House of Jacob and I will look for him MY God 's withdrawn and hides his Face I cannot choose but mourn Yet still I 'll wait upon the Lord And look for his return Doctrine in Verse Sometimes the Lord not only hides His Face from single Saints But other whiles on this account Whole Churches make Complaints And when it 's thus bewilder'd Souls Know'ng scarce what course to take But still they 'l pray and cry and call And after God will make I 'll seek the Lord says such a Soul And still upon him wait Who hides his Face from Jacob's House He 'll come though's Coming's late A Meditation upon Matth. 11. 28 29 30. COme Sinner come thy Saviour calls If penitent thou be And truly weary of thy Sins Thou 'rt welcom Soul to me Take up my Yoke for it is light Account it always best To learn of one in whom alone Thou canst have solid Rest My Burthen's easy you will find When you have learn'd of me To have a meek and lowly Mind Try Sinner taste and see A Poetical Remembrance of the Reverend Mr. John Oaks who died suddenly being taken with an Apoplectick Fit in his Pulpit Lord's Day Decemb. 23 1688. with some Hints of Advice to surviving Relations composed and made by a true Lover of him and his G. D. HEark heark what means the mournful Looks and Cries The pensive bleeding Hearts and blubber'd Eyes The Throbs the Throws the Sighs which do appear With sad Complainings almost ev'ry where Why so much Drooping in a Halcion-Day When with loud Acclamations we should pay Rather a Tribute to our Prince and Peers Who seasonably have rescu'd us from Fears Why so much Sorrow now If needs must be Occasion'd by some Depths of Misery I sigh to tell you yet am hereto forc'd My Heart 's so full it must have vent or burst Great Oaks the famous Preacher's lately dead Had hardly time t' undress to go to Bed And he must sensless be who now forbears To speak with Sorrow or to write in Tears The Heart 's as hard as Flint that cannot weep When such a one as Oaks is fall'n asleep Sabbaths were here unto him a Delight And on that blessed Day he took his Flight From Earth to Heaven where he ever sings High Hallelujahs to the King of Kings Thô call'd from Sabbaths here he 'd not debate That one Eternal he may celebrate Thô Warning's short to go he