somewhat ouerlaid with sinne though concerning the outward man hee tooke delight and pleasure in it yet when it commeth to be receiued into the inward man and stomake of his soule that is when by due meditation he beginneth to worke and chewe vpon it such is the want of spirituall heat and such is the weakenesse of his faith that being not able to suppresse the surcharging terrours of wrath and iudgement that proceed there-from by reason of the Law of God hee beginneth many times to bee sicke with sorrow then the heart is troubled and euery part beginneth to droope and faint by reason of this despayring cruditie and sinfull sicknes of the soule For proofe hereof wee haue diuers examples in the Booke of God Faith not at al times alike strōg in the worthiest of the Saints Psal 38. Dauid no doubt had a faith yet such somtimes was the weakenes of it that when hee came to the ruminating and remembrance of his sinnes he fell into great extremities as it appeareth in the thirtie eight Psalme Peter also had a faith and yet when by weaknesse and frailetie hee had so lyed sworne forsworne himselfe against his Master how bitterly was he perplexed within himselfe And Paul a sanctified and selected vessell when he considered the doubtfull conflict betwixt the law of his members and of his minde and seeing how hee was led captiue vnto sinne his faith so much relented that standing as one amazed not knowing what to doe hee cryed out Rom. 7.24 Oh wretched man that I am who shall deliuer me from the body of this death Now if the case were thus with these persons many other such which were so highly in the fauour of God so famous in the Church and indued with such an extraordinary measure and gift of faith as otherwise by their doings appeareth that sometime the exceeding surges of their faith did fall vnto so low an ebbe in the sight of sinne How can the weakeling chuse but bee greatly cumbred distressed through the weaknesse and imperfection of his faith The which sort of men Strong Christians do seldom grow to so great extremities as weake but their minds are much disordered and disquicted though they doe not alwayes grow to such extremities as did the former which through want of faith would peremptorily conclude their owne damnation yet is their minde for the most part disordered and out of frame hauing continually some wauering thoughts within them which continually vexe and wring their soules For though when they see and know their sinnes the fumes of their smoking faith not vtterly extinct ascending vp wil not seffer them to say without exception that they are castawaies yet can they not on the other side for the time be certified and assured of their life and safety but stand as doubtfull and in suspence betwixt them both Which their wauering doubtfulnesse by how much they consider it to bee contrary and repugnant vnto Faith by so much they are the more in minde troubled and distressed Insomuch that many times they are the rather giuen to iudge the worst of themselues And the suspition of death and condemnaetion seemeth vtterly to quell and ouercome the hope of life and saluation In which estate if happely at any time they fall to exact censuring and iudging of their liues according to the precise rule and Iustice of the Law of God it is a matter of no great difficultie to lead them on from step to step to the furthest point of Christian extremities I call them Christian extremities not for that it doth beseeme the profession of a Christian thus to doubt which is onely stayed in truth of Faith But I therefore call them Christian because they are such as may be had without the losse of Christ and finally fall from grace farre in very deed differing from the vnrecouerable estates of reprobates because that these extremities notwithstanding a man may still bee a vessell of mercie the chosen seruant of God and an vndoubted Christian The third thing which thus fretteth and disturbeth the broken Conscience 3 The third cause is the want and weaknes of repentance is the want and weaknesse of repentance when as either it findeth not in it selfe such a lothing and detestation of sinne as is required or such a readinesse and willingnesse vnto vertue and godlinesse as hee would and wisheth For whiles such an one looketh vpon the weakenes of his nature that is inclined to sinne Rom. 7.23 while hee seeth the Law of his members much rebelling and oftentimes preuailing against the Law of his minde And while hee considereth himselfe to be backward vnto Prayer and other such godly exercises as may tend to the seruice and honour of God Or at least not to haue so great delight and pleasure in them as is required and as oftentimes he findeth and seeth to haue been in other the true seruants of God then not onely in regard of his sinnes and sinfull life already passed but also in consideration of this his present state he groweth to a great mislike and seuere censuring of himselfe And thus or in some such like sort he reasoneth within himselfe saying If I were the Child of God The weake Christians manner of accusing and condemning himselfe if I were one of his seruants had I tasted of his Spirit which is the earnest penny of salutation then surely I should finde my selfe more affected and better minded vnto goodnes I should then be repentant for my sinnes and lothe and detest my former wickednes I should then more delight in goodnes and godlinesse then I doe But now alas I see I am a silly and sinfull castaway in whom abideth no goodnes and therefore I am an enemy to God and reprobated from grace and mercy Thus whether they consider their life past or present view and behold themselues either within or without still Satan that subtill Serpent and roaring Lyon is ready to trumpe something in their way whereby to make them stumble and fall Weake Christians resembled to little children or men weakened by sicknes By which his doings no maruell though many times hee much preuaileth Now these weake Christians are like the little child that hath learned but of late to goe or resemble those that haue beene greatly weakened with some continuall and excessiue sicknes who being newly come abroad by reason of their great infirmitie are not able to make a stedfast step but are ready to stumble in the plainest path So these either babes in faith and such as are but newly entered to walke in Christ or else weakened greatly with the continuall and dangerous assaults of sinne and Satan are not able to ouerstryde these stumbling blockes of temptations which by the enemie are continually cast in their way CHAP. III. Of the second or assistant causes of a troubled Conscience BEsides the aforesaid principall and inherent causes Other meanes whereby the extremities of
in iniquity liuing in hypocrisie dying in misery and damned for euer But why doe I thus striue to open and vnfold the greatnesse of these extremities For were their griefe weighed and their miseries layd together in the ballance it would bee heauier then the sand of the sea Were I able to conceiue them as others sometime feele them and to thinke them as others often finde them in themselues yet could I neuer sufficiently describe them Well I may in some sort touch them but they onely can sound the depth and reach the bottom of these extremities which haue sometimes tasted and in some measure felt the bitternesse of this gall and wormewood Notwithstanding as by the outward appearance of the wound the inward paines may bee coniectured and by the externall strugglings we may ghesse the internall conflicts The greatnesse of these extremities discerned in part by the effects so likewise by the effects that come from the sorrow of sinne appearing outwardly in the body we may in some sort learne how great that griefe and anguish is that possesseth the heart within For besides the plaints before set downe he oftentimes bedeweth his face with teares and weeping The body also oftentimes waxeth leane and wan fretteth away and wasteth as pained with some grieuous and consuming sicknesse not vnlike as touching the outward appearance to those pangs which Dauid a man after Gods owne heart did feele in himselfe crying out and saying Psal 6.6 Psal 38.3 I fainted in my mourning Psal 6.6 There is nothing sound in my flesh because of thine anger neither is there rest in my bones by reason of my sinnes My reines are full of burning and there is nothing sound in my flesh I am weakned and sore broken I reare for the very griefe of mine heart And againe My heart panteth my strength faileth mee and the light of mine eyes euen they are not mine owne CHAP. II. The principall causes of a troubled conscience THe causes of these griefes 1 Cause some inconsiderately haue referred vnto melancholy Is the sight of sinne wheras indeed it is nothing else but sinne For experience teacheth that this is a passion happening oftentimes to those which by the disposition of their bodies are for the most part free from melancholy though many times I also grant that melancholy pastions are ioyned and doe concurre with it Was it melancholy thinke you Mat. 26.75 that made Peter so suddenly to single out himselfe from the rabble of the high Priests seruants and sobbing full of heauinesse to vtter out the bitternesse of his griefe with teares Shall we thinke of Dauid that when hee was taken and troubled with like perplexities that the same did proceed and come of melancholy Nay the Prophet confesseth and telleth vs plainely that it was sinne Psal 38.3 Psal 51.3 And therefore prayeth earnestly vnto the Lord Psal 38.3 Psal 51.9 to hide his face from his sinnes and to put away all the iniquities of him the same Prophet Dauid Psal 51.9 This I meane this sinne is it that maketh the heart to mourne and the inward parts to fret and burne with griefe This is it that causeth the broken soule to breathe out so many sighing plaints and to bee ready to swound and burst in sunder with so many fearfull and despairing thoughts For while hee sitteth so seuere a Iudge vpon himselfe and while hee prieth so narrowly nay too too narrowly into the disordered course and manner of his life laying the triall of his deeds to the touch-stone of the Law of God and weighing altogether in the balance with God his denounced iudgements hee thinketh euery word a sentence euery threat a thraue of iudgements and euery period to containe in it an exceeding masse and hell of miseries and woes This pricketh his heart in such sort that hee knoweth not what to doe and maketh him to cry with Paul though not with the like hope O wretched man that I am Rom. 7.24 who shall deliuer me from this body of sinne and death Vnto this sight of sinne is added the weaknesse 2. The second cause is the weaknesse or want of faith and many times the want of faith For when they see and remember the sweet and comfortable promises of grace and mercy contained in the Gospell when they call to minde that precious medicine and soueraigne confection of the bloud of Christ able to heale vp the most pestilent sores and to cure the most contagious and deadly wounds of sinne And withall looking into themselues and finding there a defect and want to receiue and apply the same vnto themselues be they neuer so sweet and precious because they haue not faith which is the onely hand to retaine and hold them they are more distressed and affrighted then if they neuer heard or thought vpon them Insomuch that as Satan is ready alwayes to cast something in their way thereby to further them in the way of desperation so are they as ready so soone as it shall bee offered to catch it and accept it at his hands And therefore neuer thinking of Gods order and course of calling which is in some sooner in some later and not alike in all because they feele not the present working of the Spirit within them and the pulse of faith to moue and beat in their hearts they sticke not peremptorily and without exception to conclude vpon themselues saying I haue no faith I cannot beleeue and therefore I cannot be saued my sins cannot be pardoned I am but a reprobate and a damned castaway So that this motion is not onely found in such as haue an vtter defect and want of faith but also oftentimes in those which haue a faith who although as I haue sayd they haue a faith in deede yet it is but a weake and a faint faith and such an one as for infirmity is not able to mooue and stirre it selfe For as the man that is in a swound Such whose faith is weake compared to a man in a swound or he whose parts are benummed with some extreme cold or sudden stroke though there bee a life still remaining in them yet such is their infirmity that they seeme as dead and are vnable to performe the functions that belong vnto a liuing body euen so this faith though in truth it be a faith and hath a life in it yet it is so benummed with the chilling cold of sinne and astonied with the stroke of our naturall imperfections that it seemeth to bee dead and vtterly voyd of vitall motion So that sinne vnto this weake and wauering soule is euen as meat is oftentimes to him that surfeteth Hee eateth it with delight and taketh pleasure in it yet when his stomake commeth to digest and worke vpon it the strength of nature beeing not able to ouercome the abundance of vnconcocted humors the whole body is sicke and weakened in euery part and facultie So the soule that is glutted and
to bee noted and obserued which the Apostle to the Romanes hath not pretermitted which is the meanes whereby this peace worketh in vs and that is by Christ Iesus For in him in his death and Passion it placeth the fruit and fruition of this our remission and reconcilement at the hands of God So that this doth in a sort intimate a marke of difference and distinction whereby a man may know whether this peace be true or not For if it be not in Christ Iesus that is If in his death and Passion in his merits sacrifice and satisfaction thou hast not this affurance of remission of thy sinnes and reconcilement vnto God but seekest it in some other thing whether it be in any Ceremonies and Superstitions thine owne workes and merits or the workes and merits of any other except Christ onely and his death and Passion thy peace is not true but a counterfet peace and such as will deceiue thee The second fruit of Faith 2. Fruit of true faith is that which issueth proceedeth from this inward peace and that is a confidence and boldnes to come and approch before the Throne of the grace of God and to lay fast hold vpon the merits of Christ and the mercies of God in him Of this confidence wee read Ephes 2. Ephes 2.18 By him we haue an entrāce vnto the father by one Spirit And Heb. 4.16 Let vs therefore goe boldly to the Throne of Grace that we may receiue mercy and finde grace to helpe in time of neede And in the tenth to the Hebrewes verse 22. Heb. 10.22 it is called a drawing neere with a true heart in assurance of faith So that vpon the former perswasion and assurance working peace in their conscience and in this sight and feeling of Gods gracious and louing countenance towards them in their hearts and soules they are the more incouraged to come and approch vnto the presence of God and to craue pardon and remission of their sinnes at his hands This the Apostle elsewhere calleth a boldnes and entrance with confidence by Faith in him that is in Christ For without him no man can come or haue accesse vnto the Father And therefore they that presume to come in their owne name and worthines with confidence in their owne workes and merits or in the workes and merits of any other either Saint or Angell they cannot be iustly and truely said to haue accesse and approch vnto grace but rather to depart and to flee the further from it 1. Tim. 2.5 For as there is but one God So also there is but one Mediatour betwixt God and man and this is Christ alone And as there is but one Throne of Grace whereunto we are to come and where we are to sue for remission So is there but one way appointed for vs to vvalke vnto the same and that is the same our Sauiour Iesus Christ Iohn 14.6 who is the Way the Truth and the Life The third effect and fruit of this true Faith 3. Effect or fruit of true Faith is that standing and continuing in this grace of Christ whereupon followeth a certaine ioy and reioycing in hope and expectation of the glory of God euen that glory whereof all the Saints of God shall bee made partakers in the life to come So that this Christian ioy is nothing else but an inward motion of the Spirit whereby the heart is exhilarate and made glad partly in regard of the presence and fruition of Christ and of his grace in our hearts by faith and partly in expectation vnder hope of that glory whereof all the sonnes of God as I haue said shall hereafter bee partakers For this cause the Kingdome of God is called peace and ioy in the Holy Ghost Rom. 14.17 And of this ioy speaks the Prophet Esay saying They reioyced before thee Esay 9.3 according to the ioy in haruest as men reioyce when they diuide a spoile And yet doth not this fully expresse this ioy for it is not a bare ioy but such an one as is accompanied with a triumphant boasting and reioycing for so the word in the originall Text doth signifie And there fore Peter the Apostle doth call it a reioycing 1. Pet. 1.8 with ioy vnspeakable and glorious Example hereof we haue in Dauid to whom the promises of grace and mercy seemed so pleasant and delight some that he did solace and recreate himselfe therin as things replenished with exceeding pleasure and delight saying that they were more precious vnto him then gold yea then much fine gold sweeter also then honey and the hony combe And in the fourth Psalme hee is bold to alledge in aduancement hereof Psal 4.6 7. Many say Who will shew vs any good But lift thou vp the light of thy countenance vpon vs. Thou hast giuen me more ioy of heart then they haue had when their Wheat and Wine did abound In this sort therfore the faithfull seruants of God doe solace themselues in the sweet and comfortable promises of grace and mercy when as hauing the same to be opened and laid out before them their hearts doe leape for ioy and gladnes in regard of that exceeding sweetnes that they finde therein Insomuch that they can finde nothing in all the world so excellent precious and pleasurefull wherein they can bee moued so much to triumph and boast themselues as in this grace mercy in Christ Iesus For they doe account all other things Phil. 3.8 but meere vanities or dung for Iesus sake and in respect of those benefits which by his precious death and Passion he hath purchased for them and is alwayes ready and willing to impart the same vnto them These are the sweet and pleasant dainties whereon their soules take so great pleasure to feed according to that in the Canticles Vnder his shadow had I delight Cant. 2 3 4 5. and sate downe and his fruit was sweet vnto my mouth Hee brought me vnto the Wine-Cellar and loue was his banner ouer mee Stay mee with Flagons and comfort mee with Apples for I am sick with loue And this they doe so much the more for that therewithall they conceiue a hope of future happinesse and participation of ensuing glory that shall bee giuen vnto the sonnes of God For this ioy though it bee often great euen vnspeakable and glorious as was said before yet it is not complete and perfect in this life but shall haue fulnesse and consummation in the life to come when as our hope shall cease to be a hope and we shall be set in full possession of that euerlasting ioy and happinesse in that glorious inheritance prepared for the Elect of God The fourth effect 4. Effect of Faith whereby true faith is knowne is a second ioy which proceedeth and ariseth out of this that went before And this is seene in tribulations and afflictions for Christ his sake and the Gospell Of this speaketh
of his saluation yet may he not in defect of faith and other graces of regeneration conclude his owne condemnation and say that he is for euer reprobated and castaway For that hee hauing yet a time and space to liue bee it neuer so short a moment the Lord may therein call him home and gather him vnto himselfe The child cannot say that he is condemned because hee hath not faith because that when hee commeth to mans estate the gift of Faith may be imparted vnto him Neither hee that is at mans estate because that in his old age hee may be receiued Neither yet hee whom old age hath wearied because that if in health hee finde it not yet in the last houre and vpon his death-bed the Lord may bestowe the same vpon him and supply his want Wherefore seeing that our vocation and effectuall calling though in secret knowledge of God it bee certainly dated in respect of vs is most vncertaine whether it shall be when wee are yong or when wee are old whether this day or the next this moneth or the next yeere surely the state of the present time wherein wee finde and feele our selues can be no sufficient Argument to reason and conclude of that which we can tye or limit vnto no certaine time at all For what reason I pray you were it for a man to say I haue liued these twelue or fourteene yeeres and yet am not called and therfore I am a Castaway Or I haue liued twenty thirty or forty yeeres and yet I finde no faith and therfore I am condemned Or I am old weary weake sicke and feeble I doe looke euery houre to dye I am vncertaine of my life for an houre or a minute of an houre such is mine infirmitie and yet I finde no comfort of my Calling and therefore I shall not be called at all As though God were bound of dutie to order things according to our prescription or that either he were not able or else were vnwilling at the last gaspe to giue vnto thee greater mercie and more euident testimonie of his grace and fauour towards thee then he did all thy life before Let not any man presume to prescribe vnto the Lord what hee should doe or in what time and manner hee should doe any thing his own wisedome and his owne will and power are sufficient in this behalfe Neither let any man whartle at and why out the case with God saying Why doth he thus deferre the time and put off the comfort of his elect and chosen It is not meet that the seruant should pry so farre into the closet of his Masters secrets And who can reach or who is able or meet to search out the depth of his eternall counsels Rather lay thine hand vpon thy mouth with modesty and be it soone or bee it late doe thou still obediently depend vpon the Lords good will and pleasure which then shall take effect when as it seemeth to his wisedome most conuenient Were it therefore granted which is so much presumed in the wauering and doubting soule that it were for the present vtterly destitute and had no faith at all yet this is no reason for a man to proue himselfe a Reprobate because that no man in such a case can in this life peremptorily conclude that hee is a castaway as hath been before shewed though on the contrary the man regenerate may be certainely assured of his saluation euen while he continueth in this life Secondly the manner of our vocation both in respect of Gods working The manner of our Calling and our feeling must be next considered For the ignorance hereof maketh many euen in the very working and spring of life most of all to dread and stand in feare of death and in the very breeding of Faith to call in question and stand in doubt of the want of Faith We must therefore here note and marke that God worketh herein but not in all men alike For though some rather then others haue and finde more quicke and cheerefull conuersion in that they finde not such troublesome conflicts within themselues by reason of the shortnesse of the time yet others he leadeth on softly and step by step as it were in the worke of their conuersion So that they may seeme to put a greater difference and a longer pawse betwixt the two seuerall and generall points in their regeneration that is their humiliation in regard of sinne and of the Law and their exaltation in regard of faith and feeling of the grace of God in Christ This humiliation therefore resting a longer time in the sinfull soule Humiliation doth breed the greater conflict and bringeth forth a farre stronger combate because the time and space is greater wherein hee hath to consider of the fearefull and dangerous condition of his own estate being thus as is sayd humbled in regard of Sinne and the Law And the reasons are First because that the man so humbled doth not remember 1. Reason that God thus worketh in his seruants by degrees and not all at one time and in one instant Obiect And therupon the troubled soule is ready to obiect and alledge I haue been and continued a long time vnder the fearefull curse and terror of the Law by reason of my great wickednesses and my soule is humbled and abased euen vnto the hell and yet I finde or feele no comfort and therefore surely my case is hard and dangerous and I can be none other but a Castaway Answ This reason or rather obiection were of some force indeed if it could be certainely prooued that God effecteth all at once and that he neuer putteth any time and distance betwixt these two points of mans conuersion namely his humbling and his exaltation But seeing that it is euident that there is a time betwixt his wounding and curing his striking and healing his abasing and raising vp againe it may very well bee answered to the cheering and refreshing of the broken and contrite soule that this reason cannot bee in any part sufficient to breed in any despaire though Satan set neuer so faire and goodly a glosse vpon it And therefore whensoeuer Satan beginneth to assault and set vpon any man in this manner let the person so assaulted cast vp the eyes of his mind fix his meditations vpon this course of God which hee vseth in mans conuersion and learne withal to put in practice the rule of Dauid a man after Gods owne heart Hope in the Lord Psal 27.14 expect his leisure and he shall comfort thine heart Obiect But heereupon the troubled person so disquieted in minde will gather and say vnto mee How can these despaire and faith terror of wrath and peace of conscience feare of iudgement and hope of mercy agree together being in nature and in effect so contrary and repugnant the one to the other this appeareth to be a thing impossible For as these three latter that is faith peace and hope