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A23383 A meruailous combat of contrarieties Malignantlie striuing in the me[m]bers of mans bodie, allegoricallie representing vnto vs the enuied state of our florishing common wealth: wherin dialogue-wise by the way, are touched the extreame vices of this present time. VVith an earnest and vehement exhortation to all true English harts, couragiously to be readie prepared against the enemie. by W.A. Averell, W. (William) 1588 (1588) STC 981; ESTC S104468 32,149 54

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it be by my help and furtheraunce so that if the Belly bidde the Tongue deceiue I poast out to performe it if y ● Back commaund the Hands to steale or shed blood then I haste to make them finish it so that in all actions I am a seruaunt in most vile slauery to these vniust oppressors and therefore haue as much cause to complaine of their tyranny in euerie thing as either of you in any thing The Tongue Certaine it is we all doo serue them dilligently we labour for them painefully and yet are rewarded slenderlie The Tyrants of Sicilia neuer oppressed their subiects with more violence then they do● vs with their exactions and yet we haue thereby no benefit for had wee any recompence it woulde asswage the burthen of our trauaile and make our labour swéete but such is the condition of these two that albeit we dailie giue them hourelie labor and continually prouide for them yet they neuer cease complayning that wee giue them nothing The Hande Yea for though I labour to day to féede the one and trauaile to morrow to clothe the other yet if I doo not the next day and the next day also giue them stil they complayne of myne idlenes of mine vniustice negligence saying I am vnnaturall vnkinde slothfull and giuen to ease and that I forget the ende wherefore I was made which is they say to serue them in all necessities what said I nay rather in all superfluities The Foote In the same state am I and so they deale also with mée for though I nowe fetch them in things not wholy needfull but for the most part curious it may bee that a while they will be contented but shortly after they crie it is too little and except I procure the one varietie of dainties and the other diuersitie of sutes they are neither contented so variable are they and ful of alteration so that I cannot tell what to compare them to except to the lake in the furthest part of Affrick among the people Trogloditae which is thrise in a day bitter and salt and yet anone pleasant and sweete The Tongue Nay rather they are like the gaping Gulfe in Sicil named Charybdis which euer deuoureth is neuer satis-fied or like the fire that the more it hath the more it still consumeth for Polypus had neuer more shifts then y ● Back hath suites nor the Camelion more cullers then y ● Belly Cookes The Hande I thinke the Crocodil is not more gréedy then the Bellie nor the Leopard more variable then the Backe Theyr nature is like y ● stone Siphnius which heated in Oyle wareth hard but let alone becommeth soft The more we pleasure them the more they displease vs and the more wee bestowe vpon them the more they are vnthankfull The Tongue Will you sée the patterne of a gluttonous Pantrey then looke vpon the Bellie for he is a smoking Kitchin of variable viands Gurmand●se is his Porter and Gluttony hys Cooke the lustfull Lyuer like a flaming fire boyleth vnder the great Kettle Cauldron of the stomack the breathing Lunges like blowing bellowes 〈◊〉 by the Liuer as by a Forge the Wealand pype as it were a Cestern bringeth in liquor to dresse the cates and the entrayles like a sinck conuay the filth downe the Fundament Nowe all this while who fareth the better for theyr co●kery nay which of vs are not the worse for the Bellyes vntemperancie and which of vs smarteth not for the Backs prodigalitie Wherefore Bretheren and fellow members let vs not be subiect to two such Cormorants which regarde not our benefit but theyr owne profit consider the seruillity they haue long kept vs in what labour and paine what carke and care they haue continually put vs to if we cast off their yeake we shall bee freed from slauerie if not wee liue in continuall drudgery they rule not by reason but by rigour their lust is a law and their will a warrant and therfore to stake off their oppression were wisdome and to liue at liberty wilbe our onelye happines The Hand Sister I promise for my part to yéeld to your perswasion and whereas in times past I haue wrought full harde for the maintenaunce of these my iolly Maisters I purpose now to take mine ease thinking it better to liue at rest thē to toyle and haue no thank for my labour and therefore let them worke for themselues if they wil for I neither meane to féede the one nor clothe the other The Foote Neither will I step ouer the threshold to fetch in anie thing for the sustenaunce of the one or maintainance of the other but meane to take my rest in mine Inne expecting howe these that haue so long ruled as Lordes can become nowe seruaunts to themselues The Tongue In this dooing wee shall abate their pride and plucke downe their Peacocks plumes so that though nowe they holde theyr heades full high yet within these two or thrée dayes I am sure my gluttonous Maister the Belly wyll sing a newe song for I promise for my part to be no instrument to feede nor no seruaunt to serue him and as for our gallant youth the Back I doo not doubt but y ● want of your seruice will make him in short time after beshrew himselfe But hushe Lupus est in fabula behold where they both come of whom we haue long talked let vs shrinke a side to heare their communication till opportunity serue for vs to speake The Belly What greater misery can happen in this life then when as in a naturall body where the members should serue each others necessitie and mutually helpe succour one another they shall not onely denie their ayde vnto the body but conspire also the death of the same by meanes of which not the body alone dooth consume and pine away but the members themselues doo consequently perish and yet are they so blinded with enuie and ledde on with selfe loue that they cannot perceiue their destruction at hand till present perrill doo teach them and their owne smart doo warne them what folly it is to be led by enuie whereby to make a mutinie in a naturall bodie in which there ought to be a cordiall consent of amitie and a tuneable harmonie of loue I knowe not what hath mooued my fellow members to this conspiracie for my part I haue naturally fedde them and louingly nourished them all yet they complaine and not of me alone but of the proude Back also whose pride prodigalitie hath oftentimes indéede depriued both them and me of our due sustenaunce and naturall nourishment euen this statelie and lordly Backe the pyllar of pryde the waster of wealth and the window opening to all wickednes a leader vnto luxurie and vncleane leacherie a bulwarke to beate backe chastitie the roote from whence all presumptuous pride dooth growe for whose faults it is no reason I should suffer the malice of the members that not onelie in mine
labouring haue felt the payne all the reward I demaunde is thy good worde which if I may haue I am satisfied and so reposing my selfe thereon I ende wyshing thee health and long life with the fruition of heauenlie ioyes Farewell ⸫ ¶ A Dialogue wherin the extreame vices of this present age are dysplayd against Traytors and Treasons The Tongue DEare Brethren and fellowe members by what authoritie or right rather with what boldnes dare our Brethren the Belly and Back oppresse vs and so Lord-like commaund vs it is a shameful thing extreame folly and a thing very vnséemly when the seruaunt ruleth and the Lorde obeyeth the slaue commaundeth and the Maister serueth truelie we are worthy of the greatest torments that lyke drudges will become a scoffe and scumme to others Like fooles we haue made the Belly and Backe our Lords with great labour we get and prouide al things may please them poore soules we haue no rest sometime the Belly commaūdeth one sometime the Backe another one saith to y ● Foote arise sluggard awake the other to the hand bestirre thée apace get me some meate prepare mee some dainties fetch me some wine lay the Table the day passeth the time goeth and I haue eaten nothing Hunger and Thirst my two enemies come threaten my death the one on the one side the other on the other and therfore except yée spéedely help me I die and these are their daielie and vsuall complaints The Hande Syster you saie trueth and amongst the rest no one hath more cause to cōplaine of them both then I for I labor sundry waies to maintaine thē In the Winter I suffer cold in the Summer I endure heat my ioynts are benummed with the one and dryed with the other I labor day night to procure for thē both what I can yet they are neuer satis-fied The Tongue I knowe it but yet your toyle is not equall with myne for I am often a common Paratour and solicitour for them both Manie times I am faine to braule for them when I haue small thanks for my labour somtimes I am a Patrone or rather a Latrone to robbe the Ministry by selling of lyuings sometimes a Iudge and eftsoones a witnes somtimes a Counseller otherwhiles a Merchant and then after a retailour of wares I counterfait Lawes I tell lyes I sewe seditions I stirre vp Traytors I slaunder Princes vnder cullour of trueth I beguile and deceiue I ●weare and forsweare I breake promise I allure to whoredome to theft to murder and to all mischiefe I make no account so I may get them ought whether per fas or nefas by right or wrong If I come among Princes I flatter if among the noble or ritch I sooth them vp with swéete wordes Si ai●rt aio si negant nego looke what they say I affirme it and all this I doe that by flatteries I may féede the Belly dai●●●lie clothe the Back brauelie The Hande And I praie you is my toyle any lesse are my deceites inferiour vnto yours am I not forced through their procurements if I may without shame open my follies to picke and steale sometimes by priuie filching to make all fish that comes to net sometimes by open robbing violently to lay hands vpon others What treasons what poysonings what murder is it or what wickednes that I doo not for their sakes accomplish whose goods haue I spared whose bloode haue I not spilled to serue the turne of these my Lordlie Maisters Haue I spared the Prince the Father the Childe the Sister the Brother the Husbande the Wife Nay what age or se●e haue I pittied to please these ouerruling commaunding Lords I want no examples to confirme my sayings yet least you should imagin me to say more then I can proue I will sette downe a fewe for the maintainaunce of my cause And first to begin with Traytors did not Curio at first Caesars enemy yet afterward to maintain the Bellie and Back sell vnto Caesar for 26000. crownes the Cittie of Rome How vnfaithfully did Polymnestor of Thrace murder Polydorus King Priamus some and all for his gold to maintaine his brauerie and to sette him one degrée higher in his Kingdome Aul. Posthumius Albinus béeing sent to ouerthrow Iugurtha was corrupted with money and in stead of warre most shamefully concluded a peace How did Standley and Yorke two English Traytors in Flaunders deale with the most vertuous and famous Quéene of England whom God preserue long to raigne ouer vs to the confusion of all forraine and domesticall Traitors When the Romaines warred against the Latines Cassius a standerdbearer f●ue Crassus Brutus his sonne because for money he would haue betrayd his Father and opened the Gates to the enemies Heraclius the Emperour slewe Phocas his Father to maintaine himselfe in the brauerie of an Empire Richard the third reaching with ambition of a crowne most vnnaturally slew his two little Nephewes his hart contriued it but I performed it Frotho the King of Denmark had thrée sonnes Haldanus Roe and Scato who when their Father was deade stroue all togeather for the Kingdome by meanes of which Haldanus the elder slew y ● two yonger that hee alone might sway the Kingdome Semiramis hauing obtained of her Husband Ninus to sit but one day in the princelie seate and for that day to sway the Kingdome imprisoned her Husband afterward slewe him that she alone might liue in all daintines and brauerie These and infinit other haue the Belly and Backe 〈◊〉 me to destroy making me as a slaue to serue their appetites The Foote Séeing each of you haue iustly made your complaints as Nature hath placed me lowest so giue me leaue at last to declare my griefe I acknowledge the Tongue is greatly enforced the Handes meruailously troubled and the other members wonderfully oppressed to serue the turne of two not Maisters by Nature but Monsters by abuse yet consider my trauaile and you shall find it nothing lesse then the rest How doo I trott vp and downe and as a Porter togeather with my fellow am forced to beare vppe the rest of the members Whatsoeuer must be had I am the Messenger to fetch it is there any dish to féede the Belly then must I runne to buy it is there any fine apparrell fashionable for the Backe be it neuer so farre I must trudge for it And albeit y ● the waight of the members which nature hath gyuen be sufficient to charge ouerburden my féeble force yet must I haue a loade deuised by arte to oppresse the weakenes of my slender ioynts so that I thinke my burden heauier then Aetna or the waight of the Heauens vpon the shoulders of Atlas with griefe héerof my boanes consume my synnowes shake my humors dry vp and my ioynts quake like as when two weake Pillars beare vppe the burden of a heauie house Besides neither can the Tongue come to vtter her spéech nor the hands to execute their purpose without