him welcome like an honourable Magistrate but if he has not had the wit to sell Justice he judges no Causes in my Court I warrant him Alc. My Lord you tell me nothing of the Battel Is Thebes Victorious are our Foes destroy'd For now I find you safe I shou'd be glad To hear you were in danger Jup. aside A Man had need be a God to stand the fury of three talking Women I think in my Conscience I made their Tongues of Thunder Bromia pulling him on one side I ask'd the first question answer me my Lord. Phaedra pulling him on to'ther side Peace mine 's a Lover and yours is but a Husband and my Judge is my Lord too the Title shall take place and I will be answer'd Jup. Sosia is safe Gripus is rich both coming I rode before 'em with a Lovers haste Aside Was e're poor God so worri'd but for my Love I wish I were in Heav'n again with Juno Alc. Then I it seems am last to be regarded Jup. Not so my Love but these obstreperous Tongues Have snatch'd their answers first they will be heard And surely Jove wou'd never answer Pray'r That Women made but only to be freed From their Eternal Noise make haste to Bed There let me tell my Story in thy Arms There in the gentle pauses of our Love Betwixt our dyings e're we live again Thou shalt be told the Battel and success Which I shall oft begin and then break off For Love will often interrupt my Tale And make so sweet confusion in our talk That thou shalt ask and I shall answer things That are not of a piece but patch'd with Kisses And Sighs and Murmurs and imperfect Speech And Nonsence shall be Eloquent in Love Brom. to Phaedra My Lord is very hot upon 't this absence is a great Friend to us poor neglected Wives it makes us new again Alc. I am the Fool of Love and find within me The fondness of a Bride without the fear My whole Desires and Wishes are in you Phaed. aside My Ladies Eyes are pinking to Bedward too Now is She to look very sleepy counterfeiting yauning but She shall ask me leave first Alc. Great Juno thou whose holy care presides Over the Nuptial Bed pour all thy Blessings On this Auspicious Night Jup Juno may grudge for she may fear a Rival In those bright Eyes but Jupiter will grant And doubly bless this Night Phaed. aside But Jupiter shou'd ask my leave first were he here in Person Alc. Bromia prepare the Bed The tedious journey has dispos'd my Lord To seek his needful rest Exit Bromia Phaed. 'T is very true Madam the poor Gentleman must needs be weary and therefore 't was not ill contriv'd that he must lie alone to Night to recruit himself with sleep and lay in enough for to morrow Night when you may keep him waking Alc. to Jupiter I must confess I made a kind of promise Phaedra almost crying A kind of promise do you call it I see you wou'd fain be coming off I am sure you swore to me by Jupiter that I shou'd be your Bedfellow and I 'll accuse you to him too the first Prayers I make And I 'll pray a purpose too that I will though I have not pray'd to him this seven Years Jup. O the malicious Hilding Alc. I did swear indeed my Lord. Jup. Forswear thy self for Jupiter but laughs At Lovers Perjuries Phaed. The more shame for him if he does there wou'd be a fine God indeed for us Women to worship if he laughs when our Sweet-hearts cheat us of our Maiden-heads No no Jupiter is an honester Gentleman than you make of him Jup. I 'm all on fire and wou'd not loose this Night To be the Master of the Universe Phaed. Ay my Lord I see you are on fire but the Devil a Bucket shall be brought to quench it without my leave you may go to Bed Madam but you shall see how Heav'n will bless your Nights work if you forswear your self Some Fool some meer Elder-Brother or some blockheadly Hero Jove I beseech thee send her Jup. aside Now I cou'd call my Thunder to revenge me But that were to confess my self a God And then I lost my Love Alcmena come By Heav'n I have a Bridegrooms fervour for thee As I had ne'er enjoy'd Alc. sighing She has my Oath And sure she may release it if she please Phaed. Why truly Madam I am not cruel in my nature to poor distressed Lovers for it may be my own case another day And therefore if my Lord pleases to consider me Jup. Any thing any thing but name thy wish and have it Phaed. Ay now you say any thing any thing but you wou'd tell me another story to morrow Morning Look you my Lord here 's a Hand open to receive you know the meaning of it I am for nothing but the Ready Jup. Thou shalt have all the Treasury of Heav'n Phaed. Yes when you are Jupiter to dispose of it Jup. aside I had forgot and show'd my self a God This Love can make a Fool of Jupiter Phaed. You have got some part of the Enemies Spoil I warrant you I see a little trifling Diamond upon your Finger and I am proud enough to think it wou'd become mine too Jupiter taking a Ring off his Finger and giving it Here take it This is a very Woman Her Sex is Avarice and she in One Is all her Sex Phaed. Ay ay 't is no matter what you say of us What wou'd you have your Mony out of the Treasury without paying the Officers their Fees Go get you together you naughty Couple till you are both weary of worrying one another and then to morrow morning I shall have another Fee for parting you Phaedra goes out before Alcmena with a Light Jupiter solus Why now I am indeed the Lord of all For what 's to be a God but to enjoy Let human-kind their Sovereign's leisure waite Love is this Night my great Affair of State Let this one Night of Providence be void All Jove for once is on himself employ'd Let unregarded Altars smoke in vain And let my Subjects praise me or complain Yet if betwixt my Intervals of bliss Some am'rous Youth his Oraisons address His Pray'r is in a happy hour preferr'd And when Jove loves a Lover shall be heard Act II. Night-Scene of a Pallace Sosia with a Dark-Lanthorn Mercury in Sosia's shape with a Dark-Lanthorn also Sosia WAS not the Devil in my Master to send me out in this dreadful dark Night to bring the news of his Victory to my Lady and was not I possess'd with ten Devils for going on his errand without a Convoy for the safeguard of my Person Lord how am I melted into Sweat with fear I am diminish'd of my natural weight above two Stone I shall not bring half my self home again to my poor Wife and Family I have been in an Ague fit ever since shut of Evening what with the
Lanthorn Sosia No harm Friend I am only surveying a parcel of Earth here that I find we two are about to Bargain for He 's damnable like me that 's certain Imprimis there 's the Patch upon my Nose with a Pox to him Item a very foolish Face with a long Chin at end on 't Item one Pair of shambling Legs with two splay Feet belonging to them And summa totalis from Head to Foot all my Bodily Apparel To Mercury Well you are Sosia there 's no denying it but what am I then for my Mind gives me I am some body still if I knew but who I were Merc. When I have a mind to be Sosia no more then thou maist be Sosia again Sosia I have but one request more to thee that though not as Sosia yet as a stranger I may go into that House and carry a civil Message to my Lady Merc. No Sirrah not being Sosia you have no Message to deliver nor no Lady in this House Sosia Thou canst not be so barbarous to let me lye in the Streets all night after such a Journey and such a beating and therefore I am resolv'd to knock at the Door in my own defence Merc. If you come near the Door I recal my word and break off the truce and then expect Holds up his Cudgel Sosia No The Devil take me if I do expect I have felt too well what sowr Fruit that Crab-tree bears I 'll rather beat it back upon the Hoof to my Lord Amphitryon to see if he will acknowledg me for Sosia if he does not then I am no longer his Slave there 's my Freedom dearly purchas'd with a sore drubbing if he does acknowledg me then I am Sosia again so far 't is tolerably well but then I shall have a second drubbing for an unfortunate Ambassador as I am and that 's intolerable Exit Sosia Meroury alone I have fobb'd off his Excellency pretty well Now let him return and make the best of his Credentials I think too I have given Jupiter sufficient time for his Consummation Oh he has taken his Cue and here he comes as leisurely and as lank as if he had empty'd himself of the best part of his Almightyship Scene II. Enter Jupiter leading Alcmena followed by Phaedra Pages with Torches before them Jupiter to the Pages THose Torches are offensive stand aloof For though they bless me with thy heav'nly sight To her They may disclose the Secret I would hide The Thebans must not know I have been here Detracting Crowds wou'd blame me that I robb'd These happy Moments from my publick Charge To Consecrate to thy desir'd embrace And I cou'd wish no Witness but thy self For thou thy self art all I wish to please Alcm. So long an absence and so short a stay What but one Night one Night of joy and love Cou'd only pay one Night of Cares and Fears And all the rest are an uncancell'd Sum Curse on this Honour and this publick Fame Wou'd you had less of both and more of Love Jup. Alcmena I must go Alcm. Not yet my Lord. Jup. Indeed I must Alc. Indeed you shall not go Jup. Behold the ruddy Streaks o're yonder Hill Those are the Blushes of the breaking Morn That kindle Day-light to this neather World Alcm. No matter for the Day it was but made To number out the Hours of busie Men. Let 'em be busie still and still be wretched And take their fill of anxious drudging day But you and I will draw our Curtains close Extinguish Day-light and put out the Sun Come back my Lord in faith you shall retire You have not yet lay long enough in Bed To warm your widdow'd Side Phaedra aside I find my Lord is an excellent Schoolmaster my Lady is so vvilling to repeat her Lesson Merc. aside That 's a plaguy little Devil what a roguish Eye she has I begin to like her strangely she 's the Perquisite of my Place too for my Ladies Waiting-Woman is the proper Fees of my Lords Chief Gentleman I have the Priviledg of a God too I can view her naked through all her Clothes Let me see Let me see I have discover'd something that pleases me already Jup. Let me not live but thou art all Enjoyment So charming and so sweet That not a Night but whole Eternity Were well employ'd To love thy each Perfection as it ought Alc. kissing him I 'll bribe you with this kiss to stay a while Jup. kissing her A Bribe indeed that soon will bring me back But to be just I must restore your Bribe How I cou'd dwell for ever on those Lips O I cou'd kiss 'em pale with eagerness So soft by Heav'n and such a juicy sweet That ripen'd Peaches have not half the flavour Alcm. Ye niggard Gods you make our Lives too long You fill 'em with Diseases Wants and Woes And only dash 'em with a little Love Sprinkled by Fits and with a sparing Hand Count all our Joys from Childhood ev'n to Age They wou'd but make a day of ev'ry year Take back your sev'nty years the stint of Life Or else be kind and cram the Quintessence Of Seav'nty years into sweet Seav'nty days For all the rest is flat insipid Being Jup. But yet one Scruple pains me at my parting I love so nicely that I cannot bear To owe the Sweets of Love which I have tasted To the submissive Duty of a Wife Tell me and sooth my Passion e're I go That in the kindest Moments of the Night When you gave up your self to Love and me You thought not of a Husband but a Lover Alcm. But tell me first why you wou'd raise a Blush upon my Cheeks by asking such a Question Jup. I wou'd owe nothing to a Name so dull As Husband is but to a Lover all Alcm. You shou'd have ask'd me then when Love and Night And Privacy had favour'd your demand Jup. I ask it now because my tenderness Surpasses that of Husbands for their Wives O that you lov'd like me then you wou'd find A thousand thousand Niceties in Love The Common love of Sex to Sex is brutal But love refind will fancy to it self Millions of gentle Cares and sweet Disquiets The being happy is not half the Joy The manner of the happiness is all In me my charming Mistris you behold A Lover that disdains a Lawful Title Such as of Monarchs to successive Thrones The Generous Lover holds by force of Arms And claims his Crown by Conquest Alcm. Methinks you shou'd be pleas'd I give you all A Vertuous and a Modest Wife can give Jup. No no that very name of Wife and Marriage Is Poyson to the dearest sweets of Love To please my niceness you must separate The Lover from his Mortal Foe the Husband Give to the yawning Husband your cold Vertue But all your vigorous Warmth your melting Sighs Your amorous Murmurs be your Lovers part Alcm. I comprehend not what you mean my Lord But only love me still and
I were valiant that I might beat him away and succeed him at the dinner for a pragmatical Son of a Whore as he is Merc. What 's that you are muttering betwixt your Teeth of a Son of a Whore Sirrah Sosia I am sure I meant you no offence for if I am not Sosia I am the Son of a Whore for ought I know and if you are Sosia you may be the Son of a Whore for ought you know Merc. What ever I am I will be Sosia as long as I please and whenever you visit me you shall be sure of the civility of the Cudgel Sosia If you will promise to beat me into the house you may begin when you please with me but to be beaten out of the house at dinner time flesh and bloud can never bear it Mercury beats him about and Sosia is still making towards the door but Mercury gets betwixt and at length drives him off the Stage Phaed. In the name of wonder what are you that are Sosia and are not Sosia Merc. If thou would'st know more of me my person is freely at thy disposing Phaed. Then I dispose of it to you again for 't is so ugly 't is not for my use Merc. I can be ugly or handsome as I please go to bed old and rise young I have so many Sutes of persons by me that I can shift 'em when I will Phaed. You are a fool then to put on your worst Cloaths when you come a wooing Merc. Go to Ask no more questions I am for thy turn for I know thy heart and see all thou hast about thee Phaed. Then you can see my back-side too there 's a bargain for you Merc. In thy right pocket let me see three Love Letters from Judge Gripus written to the bottom on three sides full of fustian passion and hearty non-sence as also in the same Pocket a Letter of thine intended to him consisting of nine lines and a half scrawl'd and false spell'd to show thou art a Woman and full of fraudulence and equivocations and shoeing-horns of Love to him to promise much and mean nothing to show over and above that thou art a mere Woman Phaed. Is the Devil in you to see all this Now for Heavens sake do not look into t'other Pocket Merc. Nay there 's nothing there but a little godly Prayer-book and a bawdy Lampoon and Phaed. Giving a great frisk Look no farther I beseech you Merc. And a Silver Spoon Phaed. Shreeking Ah! Merc. Which you purloin'd last Night from Bromia Phaed. Keep my Counsel or I am undone for ever Holding up her hands to him Merc. No I 'll mortifie thee now I have a handle to thy Iniquity if thou wilt not love me Phaed. Well if you 'll promise me to be secret I will love you because indeed I dare doe no other Merc. 'T is a good Girl I will be secret and further I will be assisting to thee in thy filching for thou and I were born under the same Planet Phaed. And we shall come to the same end too I 'm afraid Merc. No no since thou hast wit enough already to couzin a Judge thou need'st never fear hanging Phaed. And will you make your self a younger man and be handsome too and rich for you that know hearts must needs know that I shall never be constant to such an ugly old Sosia Merc. Thou shalt know more of that another time in the mean while here 's a cast of my Office for thee He stamps upon the ground some Dancers come from underground and others from the sides of the Stage A Song and a fantastiok Dance Mercury 's SONG to Phaedra I. FAir Iris I love and hourly I dye But not for a Lip nor a languishing Eye She 's fickle and false and there we agree For I am as false and as fickle as she We neither believe what either can say And neither believing we neither betray II. 'T is civil to swear and say things of course We mean not the taking for better for worse When present we love when absent agree I think not of Iris nor Iris of me The Legend of Love no Couple can find So easie to part or so equally join'd After the Dance Phaedra This Power of yours makes me suspect you for little better than a God but if you are one for more certainty tell me what I am just now thinking Merc. Why thou art thinking let me see for thou art a Woman and your minds are so variable that it 's very hard even for a God to know them But to satisfie thee thou art wishing now for the same Power I have exercis'd that thou mightest stamp like me and have more Singers come up for another Song Phaedra Gad I think the Devil 's in you Then I do stamp in some body's Name but I know not whose stamps Come up Gentle-folks from below and sing me a Pastoral Dialogue where the Woman may have the better of the Man as we always have in Love matters New Singers come up and sing a Song A Pastoral Dialogue betwixt Thyrsis and Iris. Thyrsis I. FAir Iris and her Swain Were in a shady Bow'r Where Thyrsis long in vain Had sought the Shepherd's hour At length his Hand advancing upon her snowy Breast He said O kiss me longer And longer yet and longer If you will make me Blest Iris. II. An easie yielding Maid By trusting is undone Our Sex is oft betray'd By granting Love too soon If you desire to gain me your Suff'rings to redress Prepare to love me longer And longer yet and longer Before you shall possess Thyrsis III. The little Care you show Of all my Sorrows past Makes Death appear too slow And Life too long to last Fair Iris kiss me kindly in pity of my Fate And kindly still and kindly Before it be too late Iris. IV. You fondly Court your Bliss And no Advances make 'T is not for Maids to kiss But 't is for Men to take So you may Kiss me kindly and I will not rebell And kindly still and kindly But Kiss me not and tell Chorus V. A RONDEAU Thus at the height we love and live And fear not to be poor We give and give and give and give Till we can give no more But what to day will take away To morrow will restore Thus at the heighth we love and live And fear not to be poor Phaedra Adieu I leave you to pay the Musick Hope well Mr. Planett there 's a better Heav'n in store for you I say no more but you can guess Mercury alone Such Bargain-loves as I with Phaedra treat Are all the Leagues and Friendships of the Great All seek their Ends and each wou'd other cheat They onely seem to hate and seem to love But Int'rest is the point on which they move Their Friends are Foes and Foes are Friends agen And in their turns are Knaves and Honest men Our Iron Age is grown an Age of Gold 'T is who bids
Reverence sake to be close Hypocrites Phoeb. But what necessitates you to this Love Which you confess a Crime and yet commit For to be secret makes not sin the less 'T is only hidden from the vulgar view Maintains indeed the Reverence due to Princes But not absolves the Conscience from the Crime Jup. I Love because 't was in the Fates I shou'd Phoeb. With reverence be it spoke a bad excuse Thus every wicked Act in Heav'n or Earth May make the same defence but what is Fate Is it a blind contingence of Events Or sure necessity of Causes linck'd That must produce Effects or is 't a Pow'r That orders all things by superior VVill Foresees his VVork and works in that foresight Jup. Fate is what I By vertue of Omnipotence have made it And pow'r Omnipotent can do no wrong Not to my self because I will'd it so Nor yet to Men for what they are is mine This night I will enjoy Amphitryon's VVife For when I made her I decreed her such As I shou'd please to love I wrong not him VVhose VVife she is for I reserv'd my Right To have her while she pleas'd me that once past She shall be his again Merc. Here 's Omnipotence with a Vengeance to make a Man a Cuckold and yet not to do him wrong Then I find Father Jupiter that when you made Fate you had the wit to contrive a Holy-day for your self now and then For you Kings never Enact a Law but you have a kind of an Eye to your own Prerogative Phoeb. If there be no such thing as right and wrong Of an Eternal Being I have done But if there be Jup. Peace thou disputing Fool Learn this if thou could'st comprehend my ways Then thou wert Jove not I yet thus far know That for the good of Human-kind this Night I shall beget a future Hercules Who shall redress the Wrongs of injur'd Mortals Shall conquer Monsters and reform the World Merc. Ay Brother Phoebus and our Father made all those Monsters for Hercules to Conquer and contriv'd all those Vices on purpose for him to reform too there 's the Jeast on 't Phoeb. Since Arbitrary Pow'r will hear no Reason 't is Wisdom to be silent Merc. Why that 's the Point this same Arbitrary Power is a knock-down Argument 't is but a Word and a Blow now methinks our Father speaks out like an honest bare-fac'd God as he is he lays the stress in the right Place upon absolute Dominion I confess if he had been a Man he might have been a Tyrant if his Subjects durst have call'd him to account But you Brother Poebus are but a meer Country Gentleman that never comes to Court that are abroad all day on Horse-back making Visits about the World are drinking all Night and in your Cups are still rayling at the Government O these Patriots these bumpkin Patriots are a very silly sort of Animal Jup. My present Purpose and Design you heard T' enjoy Amphitryon's Wife the fair Alcmena You two must be subservient to my Love Merc. to Phoeb. No more of your Grumbletonian Morals Brother there 's Preferment coming be advis'd and Pimp dutifully Jup. Amphitryon the brave Theban General Has overcome his Countreys Foes in Fight And in a single Duel slain their King His Conquering Troops are eager on their march Returning home while their young General More eager to review his beauteous Wife Posts on before wing'd with impetuous Love And by to morrows dawn will reach this Town Merc. That 's but short warning Father Jupiter having made no former advances of Courtship to her you have need of your Omnipotence and all your Godship if you mean to be before hand with him Phoeb. Then how are we to be employ'd this Evening Time 's precious and these Summer Nights are short I must be early up to light the World Jup. You shall not rise there shall be no to morrow Merc. Then the VVorld's to be at an end I find Phoeb. Or else a Gap in Nature of a Day Jup. A day will well be lost to busie Man Night shall continue sleep and care shall cease So many Men shall live and live in peace VVhom Sun-shine had betray'd to envious Sight And Sight to sudden Rage and Rage to Death Now I will have a night for love and me A long luxurious Night fit for a God To quench and empty his immortal Heat Merc. I 'll lay on the VVomans side for all that that she shall love longest to night in spight of your Omnipotence Phoeb. I shall be curs'd by all the lab'ring Trades That early rise but you must be obey'd Jup. No matter for the cheating part of Man They have a day's sin less to answer for Phoeb. When wou'd you have me wake Jup. Why when Jove goes to sleep when I have finish'd Your Brother Mercury shall bring you word Exit Phoebus on his Chariot To Merc. Now Hermes I must take Amphitryon's form T' enjoy his Wife Thou must be Sosia this Amphitryon's slave Who all this Night is travelling to Thebes To tell Alcmena of her Lords approach And bring her joyful news of Victory Merc. But why must I be Sosia Jup. Dull God of Wit thou Statue of thy self Thou must be Sosia to keep out Sosia Who by his entrance might discover Jove Disturb my Pleasures raise unruly Noise And so distract Alcmena's tender Soul She wou'd not meet my warmth when I dissolve Into her Lap nor give down half her Love Mer. Let me alone I 'll cudgel him away But I abhor so Villanous a shape Jup. Take it I charge thee on thy Duty take it Nor dare to lay it down till I command I cannot bear a moments loss of Joy Night appears above in her Chariot Look up the Night is in her silent Chariot And rouling just o're Thebes bid her drive slowly Or make a double turn about the World While I drop Jove and take Amphitryon's Dress To be the greater while I seem the less Exit Jupiter Merc. to Night Madam Night a good Even to you fair and softly I beseech you Madam I have a word or two to you from no less a God than Jupiter Night O my nimble finger'd God of Theft what make you here on Earth at this unseasonable hour what Bankers Shop is to be broken open to Night or what Clippers and Coiners and Conspirators have been invoking your Deity for their assistance Merc. Faith none of those Enormities and yet I am still in my Vocation for you know I am a kind of Jack of all Trades at a word Jupiter is indulging his Genius to night with a certain noble sort of Recreation call'd Wenching The truth on 't is Adultery is its proper name Night Jupiter wou'd do well to stick to his Wife Juno Merc. He has been marry'd to her above these hundred years and that 's long enough in conscience to stick to one Woman Night She 's his Sister too as well as his Wife that
love me thus And think me such as best may please your Thought Jup. There 's Mystery of Love in all I say Farewel and when you see your Husband next Think of your Lover then Exeunt Jupiter and Alcmena severally Phaedra follows her Merc. alone Now I shou'd follow him but Love has laid a Lime-twig for me and made a lame God of me Yet why shou'd I love this Phoedra She 's Interessed and a Jilt into the Bargain Three thousand years hence there will be a whole Nation of such Women in a certain Country that will be call'd France and there 's a Neighbour Island too where the Men of that Country will be all Interest Oh what a precious Generation will that be which the Men of the Island shall Propagate out of the Women of the Continent Phaedra re-enters And so much for Prophesie for she 's here again and I must love her in spight of me And since I must I have this Comfort that the greatest Wits are commonly the greatest Cullies because neither of the Sexes can be wiser than some certain Parts about 'em will give 'em leave Phaedra Well Sosia and how go Matters Merc. Our Army is Victorious Phaedra And my Servant Judge Gripus Merc. A Voluptuous Gourmand Phaedra But has he gotten where withal to be Voluptuous is he Wealthy Merc. He sells Justice as he uses fleeces the Rich Rebells and hangs up the Poor Phaedra Then while he has Money he may make love to me Has he sent me no Token Merc. Yes a Kiss and by the same Token I am to give it you as a Remembrance from him Phaed. How now Impudence A beggarly Serving-man presume to kiss me Merc. Suppose I were a God and shou'd make Love to you Phaed. I wou'd first be satisfi'd whether you were a poor God or a rich God Merc. Suppose I were Mercury the God of Merchandise Phaed. What the God of small Wares and Fripperies of Pedlars and Pilferers Merc. aside How the Gipsie despises me Phaedra I had rather you were Plutus the God of Money or Jupiter in a Golden Shower there was a God for us Women he had the Art of making Love Dost thou think that Kings or Gods either get Mistrisses by their good Faces no 't is the Gold and the Presents they can make there 's the Prerogative they have over their fair Subjects Merc. All this notwithstanding I must tell you pretty Phaedra I am desperately in love with you Phaed. And I must tell thee ugly Sosia thou hast not where withal to be in love Merc. Yes a poor Man may be in love I hope Phaed. I grant a poor Rogue may be in love but he can never make love Alas Sosia thou hast neither Face to invite me nor Youth to please me nor Gold to bribe me And Besides all this thou hast a Wife poor miserable Sosia What ho Bromia Merc. O thou merciless Creature why dost thou conjure up that fpright of a Wife Phaed. To rid my self of that Devil of a poor Lover since you are so lovingly dispos'd I 'll put you together to exercise your Fury upon your own Wedlock What Bromia I say make hast here 's a Vessel of yours full fraighted that 's going off without paying Duties Merc. Since thou wilt not let me steal Custom She shall have all the Cargo I have gotten in the Wars but thou mightst have lent me a little Creek to smuggle in Phaed. Why what have you gotten good Gentleman Soldier besides a Legion of knaps her Fingers Merc. VVhen the Enemy was rowted I had the plundering of a Tent. Phaed. That 's to say a House of Canvas with moveables of Straw make haste Bromia Merc. But it was the Generals own Tent. Phaed. You durst not fight I 'm certain and therefore came last in when the rich Plunder was gone before hand will you come Bromia Merc. Prithee do not call so lowd A great Goblet that holds a Gallon Phaed. Of what was that Goblet made answer quickly for I am just calling very loud Bro. Merc. Of beaten Gold Now call a loud if thou dost not like the Mettal Phaed. Bromia Very softly Merc. That struts in this Fashion with his Arms a kimbo like a City Magistrate and a great bouncing Belly like an Hostess with Child of a Kilderkin of VVine Now what say you to that Present Phaedra Phaed. VVhy I am considering Merc. VVhat I prithee Phaed. VVhy how to divide the Business equally to take the Gift and refuse the Giver thou art so damnably ugly and so old Merc. aside Now the Devil take Jupiter sor consining me to this ungodly shape to day But Gripus is as old and as ugly too To her Phaed. But Gripus is a Person of Quality and my Ladies Uncle and if he marries me I shall take place of my Lady Hark your Wife she has sent her Tongue before her I hear the Thunderclap already there 's a storm approaching Merc. Yes of thy Brewing I thank thee for it O how I shou'd hate thee now if I cou'd leave loving thee Phaed. Not a word of the dear Golden Goblet as you hope for you know what Sosia Mer. You give me Hope then Phaed. Not absolutely Hope neither but Gold is a great Cordial in love matters and the more you apply of it the better Aside I am honest that 's certain but when I weigh my honesty against the Goblet I am not quite resolv'd on which side the Scale will turn Exit Phoedra Merc. a loud Farewell Phaedra remember me to my Wife and tell her Enter Bromia Brom. Tell her what Traytor that you are going away without seeing her Merc. That I am doing my Duty and following my Master Brom. Umph so brisk too your Master did his Duty to my Lady before he parted He cou'd leave his Army in the lurch and come galloping home at Midnight to have a lick at the Honey-pot and steal to Bed as quietly as any Mouse I warrant you My Master knew what belong'd to a marri'd life but you Sirrah You Trencher-carrying Raskal you worse than Dunghill-Cock that stood clapping your Wings and crowing without Doors when you shou'd have been at roost you Villain Merc. Hold your peace Dame Partlet and leave your Cackling My Master charg'd me to stand Centry without Doors Bro. My Master I dare swear thou bely'st him My Masters more a Gentleman than to lay such an unreasonable command upon a poor distressed marri'd Couple and after such an absence too No there 's no comparison between my Master and thee thou Sneaksby Mer. No more than there is betwixt my Lady and you Bromia You and I have had our time in a civil way Spouse and much good love has been betwixt us but we have been married fifteen Years I take it and that hoighty toighty business ought in Conscience to be over Bro. Marry come up My sawcy Companion I am neither old nor ugly enough to have that said to me Merc. But will
And what I am and what thou art be known Attend and I will bring convincing proof Amph. Thou wou'dst elude my Justice and escape But I will follow thee through Earth and Seas Nor Hell shall hide thee from my just revenge Jupit. I 'll spare thy pains it shall be quickly seen Bewixt us two who seeks and who avoids Come in my Friends and thou who seem'st Amphitryon That all who are in doubt may know the true Jupiter re-enters the House with him Amphitryon Alcmena Polydas Tranio and Guards Merc. to Grip. and Brom. who are following Thou Gripus and you Bromia stay with Phaedra Let their affairs alone and mind we ours Amphitryon's Rival shall appear a God But know before-hand I am Mercury Who want not Heav'n while Phaedra is on Earth Brom. But and 't please your Lordship is my fellow Phaedra to be exalted into the Heav'ns and made a Star Phaed. When that comes to pass if you look up a-nights I shall remember old kindness and vouchsafe to twinkle on you Enter Sosia peeping about him and seeing Mercury is starting back Sosia Here he is again and there 's no passing by him into the House unless I were a Spright to glide in through the Key-hole I am to be a Vagabond I find Merc. Sosia come back Sosia No I thank you you may whistle me long enough a beaten Dog has always the wit to avoid his Master Merc. I permit thee to be Sosia again Sosia 'T is an unfortunate Name and I abandon it he that has an itch to be beaten let him take it up for Sosia What have I said now I mean for me for I neither am nor will be Sosia Merc. But thou may'st be so in safety for I have acknowledg'd my self to be God Mercury Sosia You may be a God for ought I know but the Devil take me if ever I Worship you for an unmercifull Deity as you are Merc. You ought to take it for an honour to be drubb'd by the hand of a Divinity Sosia I am your most humble Servant good Mr. God but by the saith of a Mortal I cou'd well have spar'd the honour that you did me But how shall I be sure that you will never assume my shape again Merc. Because I am weary of wearing so villanous an outside Sosia Well well as villanous as it is here 's old Bromia will be contented with it Brom. Yes now I am sure that I may chastise you safely and that there 's no God lurking under your appearance Sosia Ay but you had best take heed how you attempt it for as Mercury has turn'd himself into me so I may take the toy into my head to turn my self into Mercury that I may swinge you off condignly Merc. In the mean time be all my Witnesses that I take Phaedra for my Wife of the left hand that is in the nature of a lawfull Concubine Phaed. You shall pardon me for believing you for all you are a God for you have a terrible ill name below and I am affraid you 'll get a Footman instead of a Priest to Marry us Merc. But here 's Gripus shall draw up Articles betwixt us Phaed. But he 's damnably u'sd to false Conveyancing Well be it so for my Counsel shall over-look 'em before I Sign Come on Gripus that I may have him under black and white Here Gripus gets ready Pen Ink and Paper Merc. With all my heart that I may have thee under black and white hereafter Phaed. to Gripus Begin begin Heads of Articles to be made c. betwixt Mercury God of Thieves Merc. And Phaedra Queen of Gypsies Imprimis I promise to buy and settle upon her an Estate containing Nine thousand Acres of Land in any part of Boeotia to her own liking Phaed. Provided always that no part of the said Nine thousand Acres shall be upon or adjoyning to Mount Parnassus for I will not be fobb'd off with a Poetical Estate Merc. Memorandum that she be always constant to me and admit no other Lover Phaed. Memorandum unless it be a Lover that offers more and that the Constancy shall not exceed the Settlement Merc. Item that she shall keep no Male Servants in her house Item no Rival Lap Dog for a Bedfellow Item that she shall never pray to any of the Gods Phaed. What wou'd you have me an Atheist Merc. No Devotion to any He-Deity good Phaedra Brom. Here 's no provision made for Children yet Phaed. Well remember'd Bromia I bargain that my Eldest Son shall be a Hero and my Eldest Daughter a King's Mistress Merc. That is to say a Blockhead and a Harlot Phaedra Phaed. That 's true but who dares call 'em so Then for the Younger Children but now I think on 't we 'll have no more but Mass and Miss for the rest wou'd be but chargeable and a burden to the Nation Merc. Yes yes the Second shall be a False Prophet he shall have Wit enough to set up a New Religion and too much Wit to dye a Martyr for it Phaed. O what had I forgot there 's Pin-money and Ali-money and Seperate maintenance and a thousand things more to be consider'd that are all to be tack'd to this Act of Settlement Sosia I am a fool I must confess but yet I can see as far into a Mill-stone as the best of you I have observ'd that you Women-Wits are commonly so quick upon the scent that you often over-run it Now I wou'd ask of Madam Phaedra that in case Mr. Heaven there shou'd be pleas'd to break these Articles in what Court of Judicature she intends to sue him Phaed. The fool has hit upon 't Gods and great Men are never to be sued for they can always plead priviledge of Peerage and therefore for once Mounsieur I 'll take your word for as long as you love me you 'll be sure to keep it and in the mean time I shall be gaining experience how to manage some rich Cully for no Woman ever made her Fortune by a Wit It Thunders and the Company within doors Amphitryon Alcmena Polydas and Tranio all come running out and joyn with the rest who were on the Theatre before Amph. Sure 't is some God he vanish'd from our sight And told us we shou'd see him soon return Alcm. I know not what to hope nor what to fear A simple Errour is a real Crime And unconsenting Innocence is lost A second Peal of Thunder After which Jupiter appears in a Machine Jupit. Look up Amphitryon and behold above Th' Impostour God the Rival of thy Love In thy own shape see Jupiter appear And let that sight secure thy jealous fear Disgrace and Infamy are turn'd to boast No Fame in Jove's Concurrence can be lost What he enjoys he sanctifies from Vice And by partaking stamps into a price 'T is I who ought to murmur at my Fate Forc'd by my Love my Godhead to translate When on no other terms I cou'd possess But by thy form
thy features and thy dress To thee were giv'n the Blessings that I sought Which else not all the bribes of Heav'n had bought Then take into thy Armes thy envy'd Love And in his own despight triumph o'er Jove Merc. Amphitryon and Alcmena both stand mute and know not how to take it aside Sosia Our Soveraign Lord Jupiter is a sly Companion he knows how to gild a bitter Pill aside Jupit. From this auspicious Night shall rise an Heir Great like his Sire and like his Mother fair Wrongs to redress and Tyrants to disseize Born for a World that wants a Hercules Monsters and Monster-men he shall ingage And toil and struggle through an Impious Age Peace to his Labours shall at length succeed And murm'ring Men unwilling to be freed Shall be compell'd to Happiness by need Jupiter is carry'd back to Heaven Omnes We all Congratulate Amphitryon Merc. Keep your Congratulations to your selves Gentlemen 'T is a nice point let me tell you that and the less that is said of it the better Upon the whole matter if Amphitryon takes the favour of Jupiter in patience as from a God he 's a good Heathen Sosia I must take a little extraordinary pains to night that my Spouse may come even with her Lady and produce a Squire to attend on young Hercules when he goes out to seek Adventures that when his Master kills a Man he may stand ready to pick his Pockets and piously relieve his Aged Parents Ah Bromia Bromia if thou hadst been as handsome and as young as Phaedra I say no more but some-body might have made his Fortunes as well as his Master and never the worse Man neither For let the wicked World say what they please The fair Wife makes her Husband live at ease The Lover keeps him too and but receives Like Jove the remnants that Amphitryon leaves 'T is true the Lady has enough in store To satisfie those two and eke two more In fine the Man who weighs the matter fully Wou'd rather be the Cuckold than the Cully EPILOGUE Spoken by Phaedra Mrs. Mountfort I 'M thinking and it almost makes me mad How sweet a time those Heathen Ladies had Idolatry was ev'n their Gods own trade They Worshipt the sine Creatures they had made Cupid was chief of all the Deities And Love was all the fashion in the Skies When the sweet Nymph held up the Lilly hand Jove was her humble Servant at Command The Treasury of Heav'n was ne're so bare But still there was a Pension for the Fair. In all his Reign Adultry was no Sin For Jove the good Example did begin Mark too when he usurp'd the Husband's name How civilly he sav'd the Ladies fame The secret Joys of Love he wisely hid But you Sirs boast of more than e'er you did You teize your Cuckolds to their face torment 'em But Jove gave his new Honours to content ' em And in the kind remembrance of the Fair On each exalted Son bestow'd a Star For those good deeds as by the date appears His Godship flourish'd full Two thousand Years At last when He and all his Priests grew old The Ladies grew in their devotion cold And that false Worship wou'd no longer hold Severity of Life did next begin And always does when we no more can Sin That Doctrine too so hard in Practice lyes That the next Age may see another rise Then Pagan Gods may once again succeed And Jove or Mars be ready at our need To get young Godlings and so mend our breed FINIS A CATALOGUE of Mr. DRYDEN'S WORKS as they are bound in Three Volumes in quarto in the order they were written In the First Volume ESSAY on Dramatick Poetry Wild Gallant Rivall Lady Indian Emperour Maiden Queen Sir Martin Marr-all Tempest Evening Love Royal Martyr Conquest of Granada in two Parts Marriage A-la-mode In the Second Volume LOve in a Nunnery Amboyna State of Innocence Aurenzebe All for Love Limberham Oedipus Troilus and Cresside Spanish Fryar Duke of Guise Vindication of the Duke of Guise Don Sebastian Amphitryon In the Third Volume ANnus Mirabilis or The Year of Wonders A Poem on the Return of King Charles II. A Panegyrick on the Coronation of King Charles II. A Poem to the Lord Chancellor Hide Absalom and Achitophel The Medall Religio Laici Elegy on the Death of King Charles II. The Hind and Panther THE SONGS IN AMPHITRYON WITH THE MUSICK Composed by Mr. HENRY PVRCELL LONDON Printed by J. Heptinstall for Jacob Tonson at the Judge's-Head in Chancery-Lane MDCXC First Song in the third Act. CE lia that I once was Blest is now the torment of my Breast Since to curse me you bereave me of the plea-sure I pos sess't Cru el Creature to deceive me first to Love and then to leave me cru el Creature to de-ceive me first to Love and then to leave me II. Had you the Bliss refus'd to grant I then had never known the want But possessing Once the Blessing Is the cause of my complaint Once possessing is but tasting 'T is no Bliss that is not lasting III. Celia now is mine no more But I am hers and must adore Nor to leave her VVill endeavour Charms that captiv'd me before No unkindness can dissever Love that 's true is Love for ever The second Song in the fourth Act. For I ris I sigh and houre ly dye but not for a Lip nor a languishing Eye she 's Fickle and false and there we a gree O these are the Vir tues that Captivate me we nei ther be leive what ei ther can say and nei ther be lei ving we nei ther be tray we tray II. 'T is civill to Swear and say things of course VVe mean not the taking for better for worse VVhen present we Love when absent agree I think not of Iris nor Iris of me The Legend of Love no couple can find So easy to part and so easily joyn'd Last Song A Dialogue betwixt Thyrsis and Iris. FAir I ris and her Swain were in a sha-dy Bow'r where Thyrsis long in Vain had sought the happy hour at length his hand advancing upon her Snowy Breast he said O kiss me longer and long er yet and long er if you will make me blest an easy yeild-ing Maid by trusting is un done our Sex is oft betray'd by grant ing Love too soon if you de sire to gain me your suff'rings to re dress prepare to Love me lon ger and long er yet and long er be fore you shall pos sess Thyrsis The lit-tle care you show of all my sorrows past makes Death appear too slow and life too long to last Fair I ris kiss me kindly in pit-ty of my Fate and kind ly still and kind ly still before it be too late Iris. You fond ly court your bliss and no advances make 't is not for Maids to give but 't is for men to take so you may kiss me kind ly and kindly still and kindly and I will not re-bell but doe not kiss and tell but doe not kiss and tell no ne ver kiss and tell Yes you may kiss me kind-ly and kindly still and and may I kiss you kindly and kindly still and kindly and kindly still and kindly and I will not rebell Yes you may kiss me kindly still and will you not re bell and may I kiss you kindly and kindly still and kindly still and I will not re-bell but doe not kiss and tell but doe not kiss and kind-ly still and you will not re bell no no no no tell no no no no no no no no no no no no I 'le no no I 'le never kiss and tell no no I 'le never kiss tell no no no no no no no never never never no never never never no never kiss and tell I 'le ne ver ne-ver never I 'le never never never kiss and tell Chorus Thus at the height we Love and live and fear not fear not Thus at the height we Love and live and fear not fear not to be poor We give and we give we give and we to be poor We give and we give we give we give and we give till we can give no more give and we give and give till we can give no more The first strain again But what to day will take a way to morrow to mor row But what to day will take a way to morrow to mor row will re store will re store End with the First Strain End with the First Strain End with the First Strain FINIS