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A36685 Sr Martin Mar-all, or, The feign'd innocence a comedy, as it was acted at His Highnesse the Duke of York's Theatre. Dryden, John, 1631-1700.; Molière, 1622-1673. Etourdi.; Newcastle, William Cavendish, Duke of, 1592-1676.; Quinault, Philippe, 1635-1688. Amant indiscret. 1668 (1668) Wing D2359; ESTC R7467 47,962 78

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a Dance then Exit running Sir Mart. The Rogue has no mercy in him but I must mollifie him with money Exit Enter old La. Truly my little Cousin's the aptest Scholar and takes our loves lessons so exactly that I joy to see it she has got already the Bond of two thousand pounds seal'd for her Portion which I keep for her a pretty good beginning 't is true I believe he has enjoy'd her and so let him Mark Anthony wooed not at so dear a price To her Chr. O Madam I fear I am breeding La. A taking Wench but 't is no matter have you told any body Chr. I have been venturing upon your foundations a little to dissemble La. That 's a good Child I hope it will thrive with thee as it has with me Heaven has a blessing in store upon our endeavours Chr. I feign'd my self sick and kept my bed my Lord he came to visit me and in the end I disclos'd it to him in the saddest passion La. This frighted him I hope into a study how to cloak your disgrace lest it should have vent to his Lady Chr. 'T is true but all the while I subt'ly drove it that he should name you to me as the fittest instrument of the concealment but how to break it to you strangely does perplex him he has been seeking you all o'r the house therefore I 'l leave your Ladiship for fear we should be seen together Exit La. Now I must play my part Nature in Women teaches more than Art Enter Lord. Lord. Madam I have a Secret to impart A sad one too and have no friend to trust but only you La. Your Lady or your Children sick Lord. Not that I know La. You seem to be in health Lord. In body not in mind La. Some scruple of Conscience I warrrant my Chaplain shall resolve you Lord. Madam my Soul 's tormented La. O take heed of despair my Lord Lord. Madam there is no Medicine for this siekness but only you your friendship 's my safe Haven else I am lost and shipwrack'd La. Pray tell me what it is Lord. Could I express it by sad sighs and groans Or drown it with my self in Seas of Tears I should be happy would and would not tell La. Command whatever I can serve you in I will be faithful still to all your ends provided they be just and vertuous Lord. That word has stopt me La. Speak out my Lord and boldly tell what ' t is Lord. Then in obedience to your Commands your Cousin is with Child La. Which Cousin Lord. Your Cousin Christian 's here i th' house La. Alass then she has stoln a Marriage and undone her self Some young Fellow on my Conscience that 's a Beggar Youth will not be advis'd well I 'l never meddle more with Girls One is no more assur'd of 'um than Grooms of Mules they 'l strike when least one thinks on 't but pray your Lordship what is her choice then for an Husband Lord. She is not married that I know of Madam La. Not married 't is impossible the Girl does sure abuse you I know her Education has been such the flesh could not prevail therefore she does abuse you it must be so Lord. Madam not to abuse you longer she is with Child and I the unfortunate man who did this most unlucky act La. You I 'l never believe it Lord. Madam 't is too true believe it and be serious how to hide her shame I beg it here upon my knees La. Oh oh oh She faints away Lord. Who 's there Whose there help help help Enter two VVomen Rose Penelope 1 VVom. O merciful God my Lady 's gone 2 VVom. Whither 1 VVom. To Heaven God knows to Heaven Rose Rub her rub her fetch warm Cloaths 2 VVom. I say run to the Cabinet of Quintessence Gilberts Water Gilberts Water 1 Wom. Now all the good Folks of heaven look down upon her Mill. Set her in the Chair Rose Open her mouth with a Dagger or a Key pour pour Where 's the Spoon 2 Wom. She stirs she revives merciful to us all what a thing was this speak Lady speak La. So so so Mill. Alas my Lord How came this fit Lord. With Sorrow Madam La. Now I am better Bess you have not seen me thus 1 Wom. Heav'n forefend that I should live to see you so agen La. Go go I 'm pretty well withdraw into the next Room but be near I pray for fear of the worst They go out My Lord sit down near me I pray I 'le strive to speak a few words to you and then to Bed nearer my voice is faint My Lord Heaven knows how I have ever lov'd you and Is this my reward Had you none to abuse but me in that unfortunate fond Girl that you know was dearer to me than my life this was not love to her but an inveterate malice to poor me Oh oh Faints again Lord. Help help help All the Women again 1 Wom. This fit will carry her alass it is a Lechery 2 Wom. The Balsom the Balsom 1 VVoman No no the Chymistry Oyl of Rosemary hold her up and give her Air. Mill. Feel whether she breathes with your hand before her Mouth Rose No Madam 't is Key-cold 1 VVom. Look up dear Madam if you have any hope of Salvation 2 VVom. Hold up your finger Madam if you have any hope of Fraternity O the blessed Saints that hear me not take her Mortality to them La. Enough so 't is well withdraw and let me rest a while only my dear Lord remain 1 VVom. Pray your Lordship keep her from swebbing Exeunt VVomen Lord. Here humbly once again I beg your pardon and your help La. Heaven forgive you and I do stand up my Lord and sit close by me O this naughty Girl but did your Lordship win her soon Lord. No Madam but with much difficulty La. I 'm glad on 't it shew'd the Girl had some Religion in her all my Precepts were not in vain but you men are strange tempters good my Lord where was this wicked act then first committed Lord. In an out-room upon a Trunk La. Poor Heart what shift Love makes Oh she does love you dearly though to her ruine and then what place my Lord Lord. An old waste Room with a decay'd Bed in 't La. Out upon that dark Room for deeds of darkness and that rotten Bed I wonder it did hold your Lordships vigour but you dealt gently with the Girl Well you shall see I love you for I will manage this business to both your advantages by the assistance of Heaven I will good my Lord help lead me out Exeunt Warner Rose Rose A mischief upon all Fools do you think your Master has not done wisely first to mistake our old mans humour then to dispraise the Plays and lastly to discover his Acquaintance with my Mistress my old Master has taken such a Jealousie of him that he will never admit him into his
he see him last Mill. Not since he was seven years old Warn A sudden thought comes into my head to make him appear before his time let my Master pass for him and by that means he may come into the House unsuspected by her Father or his Rival Mill. According as he performs his Serenade I 'll talk with you make haste I must retire a little Ex. Mill. from above Rose I 'll instruct him most rarely he shall never be found out but in the mean time what wilt thou do with a Serenade VVarn Faith I am little non-plus'd on the sudden but a warm consolation from thy lips Rose would set my wits a working again Rose Adieu Warner Exit Rose Warn Inhumane Rose adieu Blockhead Warner into what a Premunire hast thou brought thy self this 't is to be so forward to promise for another but to be Godfather to a Fool to promise and vow he should do any thing like a Christian. Enter Sir Martin Sir Mart. Why how now Bu●ly in a Brown Study for my good I warrant it there 's five shillings for thee what we must encourage good wits sometimes Warn Hang your white pelf sure Sir by your largess you mistake me for Martin Parker the Ballad-Maker your covetousness has offended my Muse and quite dull'd her Sir Mart. How angry the poor Devil is in fine thou art as chollerick as a Cook by a Fire-side Warn I am over-heated like a Gun with continual discharging my wit ' slife Sir I have rarifi'd my brains for you till they are evaporated but come Sir do something for your self like a man I have engag'd you shall give to your Mistress a Serenade in your proper person I 'll borrow a Lute for you Sir Mart. I 'll warrant thee I 'll do 't man VVarn You never learn't I do not think you know one stop Sir Mart. 'T is no matter for that Sir I 'll play as fast as I can and never stop at all Warn Go to you are an invincible Fool I see get up into your Window and set two Candles by you take my Land-lords Lute in your hand and fumble on 't and make grimmaces with your mouth as if you sung in the mean time I 'll play in the next Room in the dark and consequently your Mistress who will come to her Balcone over against you will think it to be you and at the end of every Tune I 'll ring the Bell that hangs between your Chamber and mine that you may know when to have done Sir Mart. Why this is fair Play now to tell a man before-hand what he must do Gramercy i'faith Boy now if I fail thee Warn About your business then your Mistress and her M●id appear already I 'll give you the sign with the Bell when I am prepar'd for my Lute is at hand in the Barbers Shop Exeunt Enter Millisent Rose with a Candle by 'em above Rose We shall have rare Musick Mill. I wish it prove so for I suspect the Knight can neither p'ay nor sing Rose But if he does you 're bound to pay the Musick Madam Mill. I 'll not believe it except both my Ears and Eyes are Witnesses Rose But 't is night Madam and you cannot see 'em yet he may play admirably in the dark Mill. Where 's my Father Rose You need not fear him he 's still employ'd with that same Sea-man and I have set Mrs. Christian to watch their discourse that betwixt her and me Warner may have wherewithal to instruct his Master Mill. But yet there 's fear my Father will find out the Plot. Rose Not in the least for my old Lady has provided two rare disguises for the Master and the Man Mill. Peace I hear them beginning to tune the Lute Rose And see Madam where your true Knight Sir Martin is plac'd yonder like Apollo with his Lute in his hand and his Rays about his head Sir Martin appears at the adverse Window a Tune play'd when it is done Warner rings and Sir Martin holds Did he not play most excellently Madam Mill. He play'd well and yet methinks he held his Lute but untowardly Rose Dear Madam peace now for the Song The SONG BLind Love to this hour Had never like me a Slave under his power Then blest be the Dart That he threw at my heart For nothing can prove A joy so great as to be wounded with love My Days and my Nights Are fill'd to the purpose with sorrows and frights From my heart still I sigh And my Eyes are ne'r dry So that Cupid be prais'd I am to the top of Love's happiness rais'd My Soul 's all on fire So that I have the pleasure to doat and desire Such a pretty soft pain That it tickles each vein 'T is the dream of a smart Which makes me breathe short when it beats at my heart Sometimes in a Pet When I am despis'd I my freedom would get But streight a sweet smile Does my anger beguile And my heart does recall Then the more I do struggle the lower I fall Heaven does not impart Such a grace as to love unto ev'ry ones heart For many may wish To be wounded and miss Then blest be loves Fire And more blest her Eyes that first taught me desire The Song being done Warner rings agen but Sir Martin continues fumbling and gazing on his Mist ess Mill. A prety humour'd Song but stay methinks he plays and sings still and yet we cannot hear him Play louder Sir Martin that we may have the fruits on 't Warn peeping D at h this abominable Fool will spoil all agen Dam him he stands making his Grimaces yonder and he looks so earnestly upon his Mistress that he hears me not Rings agen Mill. Ah ah have I found you out Sir now as I live and breathe this is pleasant Rose his man play'd and sung for him and he it seems did not know when he should give over Millisent and Rose laugh Warn They have found him out and laugh yonder as if they would split their sides Why Mr. Fool Oaf Coxcomb will you hear none of your names Mill. Sir Martin Sir Martin take your Mans counsel and keep time with your Musick Sir Mart. peeping Hah what do you say Madam how does your Ladiship like my Musick Mill. O most heavenly just like the Harmony of the Spheres that is to be admired and never heard Warn You have ruin'd all by your not leaving off in time Sir Mart. What the Devil wou●d you have a man do when my hand is in well o' my conscience I think there is a fate upon me Noise within Mill. Look Rose what 's the matter Rose 'T is Sir John Swallow pursu'd by the Bailiffs Madam according to our Plot it seems they have dogg'd him thus late to his Lodging Mill. That 's well for though I begin not to love this Fool yet I am glad I shall be rid on him Ex. Millisent Rose Enter Sir John pursu'd by three
yours Chr. My old Lady may do what she will forsooth but by my truly I hope she will have more care of me then to marry me yet Lord bless me what should I do with a Husband Sir John Well Sweet-heart then instead of wooing you I must wooe my old Lady Chr. Indeed Gentleman my old Lady is married already cry you mercy forsooth I think you are a Knight Sir John Happy in that Title only to make you Lady Chr. Believe me Mr. Knight I would not be a Lady it makes Folks proud and so humerous and so ill Huswifes forsooth Sir John Pah she 's a Baby the simplest thing that ever yet I knew the happiest man I shall be in the world for should I have my wish it should be to keep School and teach the bigger Girls and here in one my wish it is absolv'd Enter Lady Dupe La. Dupe By your leave Sir I hope this noble Knight will make you happy and you make him Chr. What should I make him Sighing La. Dupe Marry you shall make him happy in a good Wife Chr. I will not marry Madam La. Dupe You Fool Sir John Pray Madam let me speak with you on my Soul 't is the pretti'st innocent'st thing in the world La. Dupe Indeed Sir she knows little besides her work and her Prayers but I 'll talk with the Fool. Sir John Deal gently with her dear Madam La. Dupe Come Christian will not you marry this noble Knight Chr. Yes yes yes sobbingly La. Dupe Sir it shall be to night Sir John This Innocence is a Dowry beyond all price Exeunt Old Lady and Mrs. Christian. Enter Sir Martin and Sir John musing Sir Mart. You are very melancholy methinks Sir Sir John You are mistaken Sir Sir Mart. You may dissemble as you please but Mrs. Millisent lyes at the bottom of your Heart Sir John My Heart I assure you has no room for so poor a Trifle Sir Mart. Sure you think to wheadle me would you have me imagine you do not love her Sir John Love her why should you think me such a Sot love a Prostitute and infamous person Sir Mart. Fair and soft good Sir John Sir John You see I am no very obstinate Rival I leave the field free to you go on Sir and pursue your good Fortune and be as happy as such a common Creature can make thee Sir Mart. This is Hebrew-Greek to me but I must tell you Sir I will not suffer my Divinity to be prophan'd by such a Tongue as yours Sir John Believe it what'er I say I can quote my Author for Sir Mart. Then Sir whoever told it you ly'd in his Throat d' you see and deeper than that d' ye see in his stomach and his guts d'ye see tell me she 's a common person he 's a Son of a Whore that said it and make him eat his words though he spoke 'em in a pr●vy-house Sir John What if Warner told me so I hope you 'l grant him to be a competent Judge in such a business Sir Mart. Did that precious Rascal say it Now I think on 't I 'll not believe you in fine Sir I 'll hold you an even Wager he denies it Sir John I 'll lay you ten to one he justifies it to your face Sir Mart. I 'll make him give up the Ghost under my fist if he does not deny it Sir John I 'll cut off his Ears upon the Spot if he does not stand to 't Enter Warner Sir Mart. Here he comes in Pudding-time to resolve the question come hither you lying Varlet hold up your hand at the Bar of Justice and answer me to what I shall demand Warn What a Goodier is the matter Sir Sir Mart. Thou Spawn of the old Serpent fruitful in nothing but in lyes VVarn A very fair beginning this Sir Mart. Didst thou dare to cast thy Venom upon such a Saint as Mrs. Millisent to traduce her Vertue and say it was adulterate VVarn Not guilty my Lord. Sir Mart. I told you so Sir John How Mr. Rascal have you forgot what you said but now concerning Sir Martin and Mrs. Millisent I 'll stop the Lye down your Throat if you dare deny 't Sir Mart. Say you so are you there agen i'faith Warn Pray pacifie your self Sir 't was a Plot of my own devising Sir Mart. Leave off your winking and your pinking with a Horse-pox t' ye I 'll understand none of it tell me in plain English the truth of the business for an'you were my own Brother you should pay for it belye my Mistress what a Pox d' ye think I have no sense of Honour Warn What the Devil 's the matter w' ye either be at quiet or I 'll resolve to take my heels and be gone Sir Mart. Stop Thief there what did you think to scape the hand of Justice Lays hold on him The best on 't is Sirrah your heels are not altogether so nimble as your tongue Beats him Warn He p Murder Murder Sir Mart. Confess you Rogue then Warn Hold your hands I think the Devil 's in you I tell you 't is a device of mine Sir Mart. And have you no body to devise it on but my Mistress the very Map of Innocence Sir John Moderate your anger good Sir Martin Sir Mart. By your patience Sir I 'll chastise him abundantly Sir John That 's a little too much Sir by your favour to beat him in my presence Sir Mart. That 's a good one i'faith your presence shall hinder me from beating my own Servant VVarn O Traytor to all sense and reason he 's going to discover that too Sir Mart. An'I had a mind to beat him to Mummy he 's my own I hope Sir John At present I must tell you he 's mine Sir Sir Mart. Hey-day here 's fine jugling Warn Stop yet Sir you are just upon the brink of a Precipice Sir Mart. What is 't thou meanest now a Lord my mind mis-gives me I have done some fault but would I were hang'd if I can find it out Aside Warn There 's no making him understand me Sir Mart. Pox on 't come what will I 'll not be fac'd down with a Lye I say he is my man Sir John Pray remember your self better did not you turn him away for some fault lately and laid a Livery of black and blue on his back before he went Sir Mart. The Devil of any fault or any black and blue that I remember either the Rascal put some Trick upon you or you would upon me Sir John O ho then it seems the cudgelling and turning away were pure invention I am glad I undestand it Sir Mart. In fine it 's all so damn'd a Lye Warn Alas he has forgot it Sir good Wits you know have bad Memories Sir John No no Sir that shall not serve your turn you may return when you please to your old Master I give you a fair discharge and a glad man I am to be so rid
taken down Sir John What new device is this tro Mood I know not what to make on 't Sir John to Tony. Pray Mr. Fool where 's the rest o' your Company I would fain see 'em again When they are up the Company dances about 'em then dance off Tony dances a fig. Landl. Come down and tell 'em so Cudden Sir John I 'll be hang'd if there be not some Plot in 't and this Fool is set here to spin out the time Mood Like enough undone undone my Daughters's gone let me down Sirrah Landl. Yes Cudden Sir John My Mistress is gone let me down first He offers to pull down the stools Landl. This is the quickest way Cudden Sir John Hold hold or thou wilt break my neck Landl. And you will not come down you may stay there Cudden Exit Landlord dancing Mood O Scanderbag Villains Sir John Is there no getting down Mood All this was long of you Sir Jack Sir John 'T was long of your self to invite them hither Mood O you young Coxcombs to be drawn in thus Sir John You old Sot you to be caught so sillily Mood Come but an inch nearer and I 'll so claw thee Sir John I hope I shall reach to thee Mood And 't were not for thy wooden breast-work there Sir John I hope to push thee down from Babylon Enter Lord Lady Dupe Sir Martin Warner Rose Millisent vail'd Landlord Lord. How Gentlemen what quarrelling among your selves Mood Coxnowns help me down and let me have fair play he shall never marry my Daughter Sir Mart. leading Rose No I 'll be sworn that he shall not therefore never repine Sir for Marriages you know are made in Heaven in fine Sir we are joyn'd together in spig't of Fortune Rose pulling off her mask That we are indeed Sir Martin and these are Witnesses therefore in fine never repine Sir for Marriages you know are made in Heaven Omn. Rose Warn What is Rose split in two sure I ha' got one Rose Mill. I the best Rose you ever got in all your life Pulls off her mask Warn This amazeth me so much I know not what to say or think Mood My Daughter married to Warner Sir Mart. Well I thought it impossible any man in England should have over reach'd me sure Warner there was some mistake in this prithee Billy let 's go to the Parson to set all right again that every man may have his own before the matter go 100 far Warn Well Sir for my part I will have nothing farther to do with these Women for I find they will be too hard for us but e'n sit down by the loss and content my self with my hard fortune But Madam do you ever think I will forgive you this to cheat me into an Estate of 2000 l. a year Sir Mart. And I were as thee I would not be so serv'd Warner Mill. I have serv'd him but right for the cheat he put upon me when he perswaded me you were a Wit now there 's a trick for your trick Sir Warn Nay I confess you have out-witted me Sir John Let me down and I 'll forgive all freely They let him down Mood What am I kept here for Warn I might in policy keep you there till your Daughter and I had been in private for a little consummation But for once Sir I 'll trust your good nature Takes him down too Mood And thou wert a Gentleman it would not grieve me Mill. That I was assur'd of before I married him by my Lord here Lord. I cannot refuse to own him for my Kinsman though his Father's sufferings in the late times hath ruin'd his Fortunes Mood But yet he has been a Serving-man Warn You are mistaken Sir I have been a Master and besides there 's an Estate of 800 l. a year only it is mortgaged for 6000 l. Mood Well we 'll bring it off and for my part I am glad my Daughter has miss'd in fine there Sir John I will not be the only man that must sleep without a Bedfellow to night if this Lady will once again receive me La. Dupe She 's yours Sir Lord. And the sam Parson that did the former execution is still in the next Chamber what with Cawdels Wine and Quidding which he has taken in abundance I think he will be able to wheadle two more of you into matrimony Mill. Poor Sir Martin looks melancholly I am half afraid he is in love Warn Not with the Lady that took him for a Wit I hope Rose At least Sir Martin can do more than you Mr. Warner for he can make me a Lady which you cannot my Mistress Sir Mart. I have lost nothing but my Man and in fine I shall get another Mill. You 'll do very well Sir Martin for you 'll never be your own Man I assure you Warn For my part I had lov'd you before if I had follow'd my inclination Mill. But now I am afraid you begin of the latest except your love can grow up like a Mushrome at a nights warning Warn For that matter never trouble your self I can love as fast as any man when I am nigh possession my love falls heavy and never moves quick till it comes near the Centre he 's an ill Falconer that will unhood before the quarry be in sight Love 's an high mettal'd Hawk that beats the Air But soon grows weary when the Game 's not near Epilogue AS Country Vicars when the Sermon 's done Run hudling to the Benediction Well knowing though the better sort may stay The Vulgar Rout will run unblest away So we when once our Play is done make haste With a short Epilogue to close your taste In thus withdrawing we seem mannerly But when the Curtain 's down we peep and see A Jury of the Wits who still stay late And in their Club decree the poor Plays fate Their Verdict back is to the Boxes brought Thence all the Town pronounces it their thought Thus Gallants we like Lilly can foresee But if you ask us what our doom will be We by to morrow will our Fortune cast As he tells all things when the Year is past FINIS