you with loving kindness and tender mercies who prevents you every Morning and follows you all the day long with many signal instances of his Fatherly care and love giving you richly all things to enjoy for life and godliness If you find that you joyn in the Publick Prayers without any due Sense of God upon your Souls and without any real impression of those things to which you say Amen if you find that you repeat some words as do others but in the mean time your minds are busie in pursuing shadows in thinking of your Trades and Sports or Pastimes c. be ashamed that you do thus lose your precious time that you are guilty of such trifling in the most serious and sacred action Endeavour to be more affected with a right sense about what you do that you may offer up unto God the Sacrifices of broken and contrite hearts that you may pour out your hearts before him and may worship him with all your Soul and Mind Bid farewell to your Worldly Cares and to your Pleasures and Vanities when you come into his presence to pay your homage to him Serve him with your best affections with the strength and vigour of your desires and with all your power and might If you do this you may then expect with great assurance and confidence that God will give ear unto you and satisfy your longing Souls with good things he will make you taste and see how good he is But if you pray without being in good earnest your Sacrifices will be an abomination to him he will not regard your Prayers nor take any notice of you He will answer you according to the multitude of your Idols If you find that you lose time by your communicating in a careless and formal manner without considering the end and design of that holy Institution and without indeavouring to prepare your selves as you ought to do that you may eat and drink worthily at the Table of the Lord study to redeem this loss by partaking of this Sacrament for the time to come in a more devout and religious manner Be careful to approach with greater love and gratitude unto the Table of your Lord who not only allows you to come but kindly and lovingly invites and encourages you to do so Come with your Souls burning with love to him who dyed for you and who appointed you this Sacrament that therein you might remember his wonderful love and his astonishing compassion and mercy which he hath testified in laying down his life for sinners that he might purchase to them everlasting Life and Glory even to as many as repent and believe the Gospel Come with your hearts deeply wounded and pierced with sorrow for your sins and follies which were the cause of so shameful so painful and so cursed a death to your dearest Lord and Saviour Come with your Souls full of sincere and hearty purposes and resolutions of being new Creatures not to live any more unto your selves or unto the World but to him who dyed for you Come with your Souls likewise enlarged with thoughts of kindness and unfeigned Charity to all men with your minds delivered from all bitterness and wrath from all malice and envy that you may eat and drink at this Feast of Love with suitable dispositions of universal Love and Charity Come with a great desire to obtain strength from the God of your Salvation that you may be able to fight the good fight of Faith and may at last lay hold on Eternal Life In this manner you ought to endeavour to redeem the time by doubling your care and diligence in all those Duties of Religion in the performance whereof you have been formerly faulty and defective Thus you are to do likewise in every other Action which you perform to the glory of God When you find that you have been too formal and careless in what you have done and said for God for Example in admonishing others in instructing them in reproving them in comforting them c. endeavour to redeem time by doing those things with greater sincerity and zeal with a more pure regard to the Glory of God with a greater desire to approve your selves unto him who gives you the opportunity of doing somewhat for his Honour and with a greater Charity to the Souls of men Depend on God for a Blessing in all your endeavours beg of him that he may direct and assist you to do that which is good and well pleasing unto him and that he may so dispose the hearts of those whom you admonish instruct reprove or comfort that what you speak to them may not be lost but may have the desired effect for the glory of God and their happiness and welfare From what hath been said you may see how you ought to redeem your time The next thing which I proposed to speak to was to suggest to you some Considerations to excite you to do so Some Motives to excite you to do these things First 1. Motive from the shortness of your Time Consider how short your time is Your life is compared to a Vapour which appears for a little time and then vanisheth away Jam. 4.14 It makes a little shew and appearance for a while and then it is gone It is compared to a Post to the Swift Ships and to the Eagle that hasteth to the Prey Job 9.25 26. And to the Wind and to a Weaver's shuttle Job 7.6 7. All which Comparisons serve to express how short and swift our time is how suddenly it flies away and is gone Man that is born of a Woman saith Job chap. 14.1 is of few days And Jacob when he was a great deal older than men live to be now even 130 years old told Pharaoh saying Few and evil have the days of the years of my life been What are 40 or 60 or 80 years when a man lives so long and looks back upon them all They appear to him but like a shadow or as a Dream or like a Tale that is told Ought not this to move you to be good husbands of your short time If it were in your own power to dispose of it according to your own humour and fancy you might then be pardoned to delay your great Work and Business till you thought good But now that it is not in your power to lengthen out your time one Minute what a madness is it for you to put off and neglect your greatest and chiefest Concern Now therefore be so wise as to make good use of your present opportunities and occasions of doing good That you may work out your Salvation with fear and trembling and may make your calling and your Election sure work while the day lasts for the night cometh wherein you cannot work If a man who is guilty of Treason or Rebellion against his Prince or of any other great Crime which deserves death were allowed a few days to sue out his Pardon that he might secure
your selves to a fiery Temper you become fierce barbarous and savage thereby you turn one of your great Temporal Comforts into a grievous Cross and heavy Burden Thirdly you hereby likewise teach your Children thorough your Example to be of a passionate and violent Spirit and so you do them more hurt than all your Corrections and Instructions can do them good Never think to cure them of their Faults by your committing as bad your selves You must not do evil that good may come of it The wrath of man worketh not the Righteousness of God Fourthly When it pleaseth God to visit them with sickness 4. They must carefully improve the Time of their Childrens Sickness or of any other afflictions they meet with towards the making of them wiser and better or any other adversity be sure to do all that you can to bear in upon their minds a sense of those things you are most desirous to have them touched with and which in time of their health they made but very little account of Affliction is the time in which God useth to work upon the hearts of people most powerfully and effectually Then he awakeneth them and convinceth them of their sad and dangerous state He casts them down that being made sensible of their sin and danger he may again raise them up and speak comfortably to them I will allure her and bring her into the wilderness and speak comfortably to her Hos 2.4 Therefore all they who sincerely desire to reclaim their Children or others from their bad and foolish courses ought to take the opportunity of their sickness their pain and grief their losses and disappointments and of any other sorts of troubles and afflictions wherein they are that then they may suggest to them such Counsels and Advices as are proper for their Instruction their Conviction and Amendment At other times there are a great many things which are apt to hinder good Counsel from entring into the mind or from making any deep impression thereon pleasures and vanities are apt to choak the good seed But when they are afflicted and humbled a little by some outward pressure or bodily distemper they are thereby somewhat better disposed to hear friendly Admonitions and Counsels and to think a little more seriously of their ways and doings It is good for a man that he bear the yoke in his Youth He sitteth alone and keepeth silence c. Lam. 3.27 28. Fifthly Be earnest in your Prayers to God daily for them 5. They must daily pray to God for them that he would make them what he requires them to be his dutiful and obedient Children and Servants That he would season their hearts with his Fear and Love That he would turn them from Sin and Folly and incline their hearts to keep his Precepts always even unto the end That he would hold up their goings in his paths that their footsteps may not slide That he would be their God and guide their Sun and shield and their portion for ever and that he would give every one of them those things which be best and most needful for them You have great encouragement to do this because you are assured that God heareth Prayer He hath said Every one that asketh receiveth So that either he will grant your Children what you beg for them or if they render themselves unworthy of the mercy and kindness of God by their perverseness and stubbornness yet you are sure of one thing that your Prayers are not lost they shall return into your bosom God will plentifully reward your Piety your Charity and Zeal with more Grace here and Glory hereafter Some Motives to excite Parents to do these things Now to stir you up to perform these things 1. Motive from the Divine Command Consider first It is the Will of God that you bring up your Children in his Fear and acquaint them with his holy Laws and Commandments He who made you requires you to do this he who preserves you and keeps you alive he who is your King and Lord who has a Right to your service to all that you are able to do who is your Father in Heaven who daily takes care of you and loads you with his benefits who is the God of your Salvation who hath sent his Son into the World to die for you It is even he who saith Eph. 6.4 And ye Fathers provoke not your Children to wrath but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. If you then be the Subjects the Servants and the Children of the great God If you love and fear him as you ought to do you will be sure to make it your business to train up your Children in true Virtue and Piety to make them what God requires them to be holy as he who hath called them is holy in all manner of Conversation you will excite them to strive to enter in at the strait gate To work out their Salvation with fear and trembling To remember their Creator in the days of their youth To seek God while he may be found and to call upon him while he is near To love the Lord with all their heart and their Neighbours as themselves Secondly 2. Motive from its being a work worthy of the utmost care and pains of Parents Is not this a work worthy of all your care and pains to save the Souls of those who are parts of your selves who derive their Being from you You are the Instruments not only of their Being but the means of conveying unto them natural defilement and corruption And therefore you ought with a great deal of Zeal to endeavour to have their pollutions washed off by true unfeigned Repentance and a hearty turning from Sin unto God by their putting off the works of darkness and putting on the Armour of light by their putting on the Lord Jesus Christ and walking as he walked Are you ready to do all that you can to make your Children rich and wealthy great and honourable in the World And yet are you at so little pains to do that for them which tends to make them rich in Faith and Heirs of a glorious Inheritance You endeavor to acquaint them with those who may be useful to them in their worldly Affairs and Concerns And why do you not strive to acquaint them with God their greatest and best Friend Who is sure to stand by them to take them up and to take care of them when all forsake them and turn their backs upon them Why do you not with greater earnestness endeavour to procure unto them his Friendship and Love who is infinitely Powerful and infinitely Good and Kind and therefore not only can but will do for them exceeding abundantly above all that either you or they can think or ask Thirdly The doing of this is attended with great Rewards 3 Motive from the Rewards which attend those who faithfully do these things not only in another World
failed in your Duty to them as to their Bodies and Outward Concerns And the more you find you have done amiss resolve so much the more to be zealous to do them good to double your diligence in promoting the wellfare and happiness both of their Souls and Bodies Tell them so far as is meet what you now see and feel let them know that you have been out of the way that you have milled them and brought both your selves and them in danger of being undone and ruined eternally Tell them what you resolve to do and what you and they ought to do and must do or else that you will certainly perish Delay not to do this one moment fly like a Bird out of the Snare of the Fowler Your Souls lye at the stake and therefore do what Men use to do to save their Lives Skin for Skin and all that a Man hath will he give for his Life Men are ready to part with any thing to save their lives They 'l part with House and Lands with Silver and Gold with their whole Estate and Substance to save their Bodies alive which must dye at last and for ought they know may dye within a very few days or hours How much more ought you that you may save your own Souls and the Souls of your Children to part with your vile and unruly Lusts and Passions your vain foolish Habits and Customs which are your reproach and dishonour which are the worst things in the World which can do you no good if you hold them still but will certainly do you a great deal of mischief They will prove the cause of your destruction they will deprive you of all that is good and excellent they will cut you off from the favour of God the Love of Christ and the fellowship of the Blessed Spirit they will likewise deprive you of the assistance and Ministry of the Holy Angels and the Comfortable Society of the Saints departed they will exclude you for ever from the Kingdom of Heaven the Crown of righteousness the peace and joy the love and glory of the future State All this your sins will deprive you of and instead thereof they will expose you to the Wrath of God to the devouring fire to everlasting Burnings to blackness of darkness to weeping and gnashing of Teeth to the wretched and cursed company of Devils and damned Souls to the Worm which never dieth which will gnaw you and torment you for ever And will you chuse all this rather than part with your Lusts that you may be for ever happy and have fulness of joy and pleasures for evermore Will you be so mad as to prefer Hell and Death everlasting Misery and Woe to Heaven and everlasting life to Blessedness and Glory Now is the time for you to become either happy or miserable if you repent and amend and act the part of Wise and Religious Parents you may be happy for God will have mercy upon you Isa 55.7 Let the wicked forsake his way and the unrighteous Man his Thoughts And let him return unto the Lord and he will have mercy upon him and to our God for he will abundantly pardon Follow therefore the Example of the Psalmist Psal 119.59 60. I thought on my ways and turned my feet unto thy Testimonies I made haste and delayed not to keep thy Commandments But if instead of this you continue in your sin and folly setting at naught Gods Counsels and despising his Reproofs putting the Evil Day far from you promising your selves peace and safety tho' you walk after your own Hearts Lusts making a mock at sin and laughing at all that is sacred and serious and by your wicked Example destroying the Souls and Bodies of your poor Children then assure your selves God will not be mocked he will at last whet his Sword and bend his Bow and make ready his Arrows against his Adversaries he will render to you according to your Works he will in no wise clear the Guilty Consider the terrible threatning which is mentioned Deut. 29.19 20. against the man who when he heareth the words of the Curse does bless himself in his Heart saying I shall have peace tho' I walk in the imagination of my heart to add drunkenness to thirst The Lord will not spare him but the anger of the Lord and his jealousie shall smoke against that man and all the Curses that are written in this Book shall lye upon him and the Lord shall blot out his Name from under Heaven Concerning the Duty of Parents when God removeth their Children by death After all that hath been said it will not be unfit to add somewhat concernning the Duty of Parents when God sees fit to remove their Children from them by Death This falls out so very often to Parents that it cannot but be seasonable to a great many to suggest to them some plain and easie considerations which they may sometimes reflect upon and imprint on their minds that so they may not be surprised with the death of their Children nor swallowed up of excessive and immoderate grief Parents ought to consider 1. They ought to consider that it is the Lord who does it when their Children dye first that is the Lord who does it He who is Lord of Life who gave Life to themselves and to their Children is also Lord of death and removes out of the World whom and when he sees sit He is the great Potter and Man is the Clay which he hath formed and fashioned into a curious and beautiful shape and animated with an immortal Soul When he sees fit to break this brittle Vessel in pieces and to separate the Soul from it who dare say unto him What doest thou May not he do with his own what he thinks good Or must he give an account of his Actions unto the work of his own hands He is infinitely great and powerful and therefore will do according to his own good pleasure He is infinitely wise and knows what 's best and fittest to be done He is infinitely good and kind and therefore will order all things for good And he is infinitely just and righteous and therefore can do no wrong It 's fit therefore that Parents when God removes their Children from them by Death submit chearfully to the will of him who is infinitely powerful wise good and just and that they adore him and say with Ely 1 Sam. 3.18 It is the Lord let him do what seemeth him good 2. They ought to consider that their Children were born mortal Secondly They should consider that their Children were born Mortal frail by Nature subject to a necessity of dying by their very composition and frame and also by the Decree of Heaven Heb. 9.27 It is appointed for all Men once to dye And therefore when God sees fit to remove them by Death to make the House of Clay fall down about their Ears Parents ought not to be surprised This is nothing
of Men in all places and in all Ages whereby they are taught that Children ought to honour and obey their Parents to love them and to relieve them and provide for them if they stand in need of their help These have always been the calm and sober thoughts of all Men and when any were so wicked as to violate this sacred Law they were hated and abhorred by all others and in all well govern'd States were punished according to the demerits of their Crime and the degree of their disobedience and perverseness either immediately by the Parents or by publick Judges upon complaint made by Parents The Sense of all this ought to move Children to honour their Father and Mother that they may approve themselves to God who requires them to do so and that upon the severest Penalties if they shall dare to dishonour them and disobey them Secondly To encourage Children to perform their Duty to their Parents 2. Motive from the Divine Promise God hath been pleased to add a gracious promise That thy days may be long upon the Land which the Lord thy God giveth thee He might only have commanded them to do this by virtue of his absolute Power and Soveraign Authority which he has over all Men without proposing any Reward but such is his infinite Bounty and Goodness that he hath added a Promise to the Command thereby to make Childrens Duty the more easie As to the Promise it self it is not to be understood absolutely as if all good Children should live long promises of Temporal Blessings are made conditionally that is so far as God sees such things best and fittest for us So that as to this promise of long life God will bestow it if it be most for his own Glory and the good and Benefit of Children Oftentimes he does lengthen out the years of pious and dutiful Children whereas the years of wicked and undutiful Children are shortned by their prophane and wicked Courses so that some of them are cut off immediately by the hand of God and others are put to death by the hand of Man As for those Children who live not to a great Age tho' they are very dutiful and obedient to their Parents God doth make up what is wanting in the number of their years here with an everlasting Life and Glory in Heaven In which case there 's no cause to Complain as if God did not fulfill his promise to them For as there is no reason for a Man to complain who is employed to work for so much a day if his Master see it fit to free him from his Work and pay him all his Wages before the third part of his time is out Even so if God think fit to set his Children at Liberty from the toil and labour of this life and to bestow upon them glorious and Eternal Rewards while they are in the Morning or Noon as it were of their Age there is no ground of complaining upon his doing so but rather great matter of praise and thanksgiving unto him whose mercy and love is infinitely great But besides this Reward in the other World there are Temporal Blessings which God will bestow on those who keep this Commandment How acceptable and pleasing to him was the Obedience of the Rechabites unto their Father tho' his Commands seemed very hard and severe to wit That they should drink no Wine nor build House nor sow seed nor plant Vineyard nor have any but should dwell in Tents Jer. 35. 6 7. c. And ver 18. Jeremiah said unto the House of the Rechabites Thus saith the Lord of Hosts the God of Israel because you have obeyed the Command of Jonadab your Father and kept all his Precepts and done according to all that he hath commanded you Therefore thus saith the Lord of Hosts the God of Israel Jonadab the Son of Rechab shall not want a Man to stand before me for ever Which Words import that he would take a particular care of them that he would be mindful of them and have them in his Eye that he would preserve them and shew them his favour and love and continue unto them those Offices and Priviledges which they enjoyed which some think were of being Scribes and Doctors of the Law and having some Charge in or about the Temple 3. Motive from the Example of our Blessed Saviour Thirdly Besides the Command of God and the Reward which he hath promised to them who honour their Parents how strong an Argument ought it to be unto all Children to excite them to this when they consider the Example of their Blessed Lord and Master their King and Saviour Jesus Christ Of whom it is said that he was subject unto his Parents Luke 2.51 And if he who was so much greater than his Parents who was their Lord their King their Maker their Saviour and Redeemer if he who was the Son of God and thought it no Robbery to be equal with God I say if he was subject to his Parents ought not all Children to be so to their Parents and to esteem it their glory to imitate their Prince and Saviour as in his other Virtues so in his Obedience and Subjection to his Parents Shall any Man think himself too good to do this when Christ did it before him Can it be too mean for a Worm to do that which a Man a great Man and a mighty Prince hath done Shall vile sinners think themselves abased and dishonoured by doing that which was done before by him who knew no sin and in whose Mouth there was found no guile who was holy harmless and undefiled separate from sinners and made higher than the Heavens Heb. 7.26 As our Blessed Lord was a great and noble Pattern to us in other things so particularly in his love to his Parents When he was upon the Cross a little before he gave up the Ghost he expressed how great his love was to his Mother and how tender a care he had of her John 19.25 26 27. Now there stood by the Cross of Jesus his Mother and his Mothers Sister Mary the Wife of Cleophas and Mary Magdalene When Jesus therefore saw his Mother and the Disciple standing by whom he loved he saith unto his Mother Woman behold thy Son Then saith he to the Disciple behold thy Mother And from that hour that Disciple took her unto his own home He commends his Mother to John Joseph in all probability being dead that he might take care of her as of his own Mother Tho' he was at this time in the midst of great pain and anguish tho' his hands and his feet were nailed to the Cross tho' his head was Crowned with Thorns tho' he lay under the most insupportable Burden that ever Man lay under yet as if the sight of his Mother had made him forget all his Sufferings and Torments he affectionately recommends her to the Care of another who he knew would perform all the Offices of
is who do not imploy to any good purpose those Gifts which God bestows upon them who stand idle all the day long in the Vineyard Eighthly Redeem time in your sacred and religious Duties 8. Time to be redeemed in sacred performances by doing them in the best manner and Performances by endeavouring to do them in the best and perfectest manner you can When you read and pray and meditate and examine your selves and hear the word of God preached and sing his praises and partake of the holy Sacrament and perform other acts of Religion and Piety in a lifeless dull unconcerned and formal manner you lose your time and therefore when by due reflection upon your ways you find that you do so endeavour afterwards to redeem it by greater watchfulness and seriousness otherwise you may go on a great while in a course of Devotion to very little purpose if you do not stir up your selves to do the best that 's in your power to do by God's help Thus when you find that you have read the Word of God in a careless and negligent manner without considering whose Word it is and for what end it is written and without those dispositions of mind that are necessary you must afterwards endeavour to redeem the time by being more careful to read that sacred Book with greater reverence and seriousness and with greater pleasure and delight Pray to God more heartily for his direction and assistance Meditate more attentively on what you read and lay it up in your hearts that it may be always in a readiness for your use as the rule of your lives If you find that you have lost your time in prayer by not making your Addresses to God with a deep humility and reverence with unfeigned Faith and fervent Love and with great earnestness sincerity and importunity endeavour afterwards to pray with all possible humility and reverence with greater Faith and Confidence and with a mighty earnestness and fervency of Spirit Study to have your Souls possessed with a deeper sense of your wants and necessities that you may beg supplies of all needful things from him who can help you to the utmost Be more sensible of the greatness of your sins and of the many hainous aggravations that attend them that you may make humble confession of them with true sorrow and contrition Consider the danger to which your Hypocrisie or formality and lukewarmness in religious Duties do expose you that you may with great integrity and uprightness of Soul make your Addresses to the searcher of Hearts and tryer of the Reins who takes pleasure in the hearty and chearful services of those who draw near unto him Be possessed with more lively impressions of the Divine Power and Greatness of the Justice Holiness Goodness Mercy and Faithfulness of God that the sense thereof may make you adore him and call upon him in such a manner as is suitable to so glorious a Majesty If you find that the time you have set apart for self Examination has been lost by a negligent performance of this Duty by your not being in good earnest when you pretended to call your selves to an account Endeavour to redeem the time by searching your hearts and enquiring into your ways with greater care and exactness Examine and try your selves as in the sight of God as Men that are in good earnest to save their Souls from everlasting condemnation Deal impartially with your selves do not extenuate your own Faults but aggravate them by all just and fit considerations Endeavour to be deeply touch'd with hearty Contrition and real Grief and Sorrow for them let your repentance in all regards be more sincere and unfeigned and your purposes and resolutious more strong and steady If you find that you have reflected on God's Mercies and Favours to you without that grateful sense which you ought to have had thereof and without making suitable returns so far as you were able by his Grace for his great and undeserved goodness endeavour afterwards to employ your thoughts on so delightful a subject as is the Divine Love and Goodness with greater pleasure and with a more lively sense thereof than you have been wont Let the consideration of the love and goodness of God powerfully move you and prevail with you to do somewhat which may testifie the reality of your gratitude somewhat that may be of real benefit to the Souls or Bodies of others If you find that you have been very formal and careless in performing what relates to the publick Worship endeavour to redeem the time by being more sincere and devout For Example if you have heard the Word of God read and preached in a trifling and unconcerned manner without those dispositions of mind which were requisite in a Christian Hearer and in an humble Disciple of Jesus Christ if you have attended on such occasions more out of compliance with Custom and the Example of others than out of Conscience and from Principles of true Religion and Devotion Consider that this is to lose time and under an appearance of Religion to remain without any thing of it in reality You must therefore afterwards endeavour to hear the Word of God in another manner to wit as the Law and Rule of your Lives as that which is given you of God to make you wise and good and to fit you for everlasting Happiness and Glory you must as new born Babes desire the sincere Milk of the Word that your Souls may grow thereby You must hear it with great reverence and attention and with humble and tractable minds you must study to have it ingrafted in your hearts that it may abide there as a Scion in a stock and may grow and bear fruit unto everlasting life You must reflect on what you hear when you leave the Church you must not lay aside all further thinking on what has been read or preached to you you are to talk a little with your own hearts about those things and to call to mind any thing you heard which tends to make you wiser and better Endeavour to have it deeply imprinted on your Souls that it may prove unto you the Power of God unto Salvation the savour of life unto life If you find that you have been too often guilty of singing the Praises of God with your mouths only without any melody in your hearts without any real sense of the greatness and power of the kindness and love of the patience and long-suffering of the truth and faithfulness of him whom you praise and celebrate Endeavour to be more devout and serious in that part of Worship sing unto God not only with you Voice but with your Heart which is the chief thing that God looks to Study to raise your Souls to him as well as to lift up your Voices when you sing his praises Stir up all within you to bless his holy Name who forgiveth all your Iniquities and healeth all your diseases who crowneth
THE TRUE Interest of Families OR DIRECTIONS HOW PARENTS May be happy in their Children AND CHILDREN In their PARENTS To which is annexed a Discourse about the Right Way of Improving our Time By a Divine of the Church of England With a Preface by A. HORNECK D. D. London Printed for J. Taylor at the Ship in St. Paul's Church-yard and J. Everingham at the Star in Ludgate-street 1692. THE PREFACE THE Author of the ensuing Treatise having thought fit to recommend his Papers to â—…ty perusal I was willing to usher â—hem into the World with some remarks upon his pious design and the usefulness of Tracts of this nature The plainness of the stile must be no discouragement to the Reader nor must Truth be therefore laid by because it comes not drest in a Vesture of Gold or wants the Curiosities of Embroidery Truth needs no borrow'd Beams its natural Light is enough to strike the Senses If it be Truth it is no matter whether it 's presented in an Earthen Vessel or in a Silver Dish The serving of it up according to the Mode may indeed please sickly Fancies but is no great Charm or Motive to inquisitive or rational Men who love Beauty without painting and are more taken with the natural mixture of white and red than with all the artificial Washes which are used to make the Features amiable Plat. l. 2. de Republ. Aristot l. 6. Politic. c. 1. The Welfare of a Common-Wealth doth in a great measure depend upon the Duties of the Relatives here treated of and did Parents and Children conscientiously discharge all the Obligations incumbent upon them by the Law of God and Nature the World could not be so wicked as it is Education makes the first impressions upon the Souls of Men and were care taken that the ground be impregnated with good Seed such a Harvest might be expected from it that Posterity might be the better for it I am sensible that Conversation and the Humour of the Age is apt to make strange alterations in the Principles we imbibe yet something will stick and when the thoughts are cool and Men come to reflect the Principles they have learned when the wax was soft will recoil and oblige them to return to their Duty Of this we have experience and though there is no rule so general but admits of exceptions yet it 's enough that this effect doth frequently appear which is no inconsiderable Motive to the serious consideration of a thing of this importance It was a wise answer which one of the LXXII Interpreters gave to Ptolemaeus Philadelphus who asked him what was the greatest negligence The neglect saith he of the good Education of Children It is so and the hurt that 's done by it both to them and to the Publick is unspeakable Whence is it that there are so many Prodigals that so many come to an untimely end that so many run into excesses which destroy both Soul and Body From want of pious Education It was a severe Censure which Carneades the Philosopher passed upon the Children of Rich Men that they learned nothing but to ride well Indeed it is to be wondered that Rational Creatures should be so careful to breed up their Progeny to sensuality and neglect the cultivation of that which makes them differ from Bruits and shews they are Creatures of a nobler extract Can any thing be more reasonable than virtue and the fear of God Is not this it which both Scripture and Philosophy teaches Do not we our selves confess so much and do not most Men acknowledge it when they come to dye And yet that we should make this the least part of our care in the Education of Youth is wondrous strange Some seem to fancy that sending their Children to School or to teach them their Catechism is all the Care that is incumbent upon them Though I cannot say but that this is a Duty yet it is so imperfect that I can scarce honour it with the Title of doing it by halves it being but the beginning or the least part of it Instruction Precept and Example are the mighty Engines and Instruments in the promoting and accomplishing this Work and perhaps nothing hath a greater influence than Example for all the Moral Precepts of the Parents are like Water spilt upon the Ground where Example doth not concomitate the instruction How shall the Child learn Sobriety where the Father is often drunk Or how is it possible the young man should be meek and patient where the Father is Cholerick and hath no command of his passion I do not restrain the Grace of God and am sensible that the very impiety of the Parents hath sometimes contrary Effects upon certain Children and they learn to be good by the Wickedness of their Superiors but this is an extraordinary Providence which God exerts sometimes to manifest his Omnipotence and to let men see that he can bring light out of darkness but the ordinary way of Edifying those under our Charge is to teach them by Example And though even this proves ineffectual sometimes yet it 's enough that it is our Duty and that we have discharged it and have taken that way which was most rational and of God's prescription Hierom Ep. 7. ad Laetam I am so pleased with St. Ierom's Advice to Laeta concerning the Education of her Daughter that I cannot forbear to transcribe part of it I will let you see saith he what Education you are to give to a Daughter whose Soul ought to be the Temple of God Let her hear nothing learn nothing speak nothing but what may inspire the fear of God into her Let her not listen to prophane Discourses nor be enamoured with Love Songs or amorous Ditties Let her use her self at certain hours to sing Psalms let none be about her but sober Servants and keep her from running into Company light and vain where she will learn more ill than good Use her to reading and to work and labour and promise her Rewards and incite her to Emulation excite her to Virtue by praises and Commendations and make her ambitious to excel others in Virtue and good Works Let her learn Scripture Sentences by heart and chuse her a Master that may not only teach her to read but instruct her in good manners Give her a Nurse neither debaucht nor tatling nor given to strong Liquors and let her Habit be modest and such as becomes her Christian Profession Let her not bore Holes in her Ears for Pendants neither let her use any Paint or Wash to beautifie her self Let her not be nice in ordering the Hair of her Head neither suffer her to adorn her self with Gold or Pearls or precious Stones except you design her for Hell fire When she comes to riper age let her go with her Parents to the Temple but let her not return to the Gayeties of the World Advise her to keep her self in her Chamber and let her not go to Feasts
and merry Meetings I would not have her use too much Fasting and Abstinence which may hurt her health at least till she be stronger and better able to bear it Let her use God's Creatures for necessity and not for voluptuousness sake Suffer her not to be at Musical concerts nor to be fond of Fiddles and Lutes and Harps but let her repeat every day some passages out of the Word of God Let her not go abroad any where without her Mother nor be very familiar or enter into intreagues with any Servant Appoint her a Governess that 's sage and wise and who may teach her to rise at midnight to sing Praises to her God Let her pray and work Day and Night Teach her to handle her Needle to spin and to exercise her self in turning the Spindle Suffer her not to imploy her self in Imbroideries of Gold and Silver Let her Clothes be plain and decent and let her eat soberly and temperately and let her not take pleaâ—â—â—â— I know what will be objected here that this is the advice of a Hermit and to teach a Daughter how to be a Nun. But still I appeal to any unprejudiced person whether this be not the most likely way to Salvation and whether these Precepts be not agreeable to the Gospel of Christ And though I will grant that all are not under the same Circumstances and all cannot give the same Education yet as to the principal part of the advice which is to teach Children by Word and Example how to die to Sin and to the World it must be granted it 's very practicable This Age indeed hath learnt to shake off these stricter Rules but they should shew us too what Warrant they have from the Word of God to do so It was judiciously observed of Fabius that a soft and effeminate Education breaks the strength of Body and Mind and whilst we breed up Children to all the Arts of Vanity and Luxury they continue strangers to God and to themselves The Vine grows wild if it be not cut so doth Youth if they be not betimes curbed in things which war against the Soul Vnderstand this ye Parents and be instructed ye to whom God hath committed the care of Education ye are God's Stewards and your Children are the Goods you are to manage to your Master's Glory Their blood God will require at your hands Have not ye read the Curse God pronounced against Eli for his negligence and are not ye afraid of the same Judgment Ye are the persons by whom your Children must be taught to serve God in their Generation ye are the persons from whom they are to learn their Duty to God and Man at your door the fault will lie if they miscarry through your carelesness Are their Souls so contemptible in your eyes that you will let them perish for want of Admonition Did Christ think them worth purchasing with his own Blood and will ye let them lie without fence or wall or cultivation You take care that they may live comfortably in this World Is it not a greater Duty to bestir your selves that they may enjoy God for ever It is joy to you to see them do well here and ought it not to be a greater joy to find that they are like to reign with Christ and his Saints in a better World You love them but how doth it appear you do while you let their Souls die Is this your Love to provide for their flesh and to neglect enriching their better part with religious Principles You would have them go to Heaven when they die but how is it possible they should when you are loth to be at the trouble to shew them the way that leads to that Paradise Was ever any man saved without Holiness and do you hope they will be without this qualification If you teach them not by Word and Example to practise that Holiness how can you or they hope to ascend into the Mount of God or dwell on the everlasting Hills Do you believe a future Account and do not ye enquire whether you discharge your Duty to your Children Or is this no part of the Account ye are to give Ye are the persons who are to breathe goodness into them and to give them life and happiness Ye are their Gods as it were and from you they receive their motion and their spiritual as well as their natural life must begin from you Ye are Magistrates in your Families and it is your Province to be a terrour to evil doers and Encouragers of those that do well If by your indulgence they sin and by your connivence they grow wicked will not the supreme Judge be avenged on such Officers You blame Governours of a Commonwealth if they do not adnimadvert on Offenders or are regardless of the reins of Justice and do not you blame your selves who are Commanders in your Families for suffering the fear of God to decay there which is the only thing that can make them happy How is it that you will not understand your interest Is it not your interest to educate them into the Practice of Virtue and Goodness and Self-denial If they love God they must needs love you that love will constrain them to express their Duty to you The Presence of God will over-awe them and they 'l obey you not with eye-service but when your eye is off from them The fear of God will make them conscientious of obeying your Commands in secret and if your good Counsels and Examples prevail with them they will be not only your Children but the Children of God and you will have this satisfaction that you do not only love them but that God loves them and dwells in them and they in him Remember this ye that are Children and let this encourage you to a faithful discharge of your Duty Your Parents that under God gave you life have a just Right to your Services and Obedience You are born Servants to them and to be at their beck and command is the obligation you bring with you into the World As the Authority of Parents was the first Government in the World so your subjection to them is the first Service that was ever known in the World Can you think any thing too good for them who are the great Instruments of conveying to you all the goods you possess and all the endowments you are invested with If you follow not their good Instructions and Admonitions ye are the greatest Rebels in the World and the sin is as great a Treason in the Family you live in as Sedition in a Kingdom is against the State You have the noblest Promises made you to reward your Obedience and though it is a natural Duty bound up with your very Being yet God will reward it as if it were a deliberate self-denial and because you shall not stay for the recompence God will bless you here and your lives shall be comfortable on this side Heaven It
begin with Prayer to God humbly begging the Divine Assistance and Direction that he may open their eyes to see their sin and folly and to discover his mercy and kindness his long suffering and patience towards them that they may be thereby led to Repentance They may next enquire particularly and strictly into their ways and doings which they may do by considering what have been their thoughts their words and deeds each of which they are to examine according to the Rule of God's Word Or which comes to the same thing they may go over the Commandments and see wherein they have broken any of them Wherein they find themselves guilty they are with unfeigned sorrow and inward contrition to confess it to mourn for it and earnestly to beg forgiveness of God resolving with full purpose of heart to do so no more but to cease from evil and to learn to do well They are to consider what Temptations they are most in danger of that they may avoid them They are also to consider what course they must take and what Christian Methods they must use to overcome their evil Inclinations and foolish and bad Customs and they are to resolve to govern themselves accordingly and sincerely to endeavour to go on unto perfection After this they may reflect on the kind Providences they have met with that their Souls may be filled with a grateful sense thereof that they may return all praise and thanks to God for his mercy and love and may be excited for the time to come to trust more firmly in him and to depend upon him They may particularly consider wherein God hath been pleased to answer their Prayers and to grant them the good things they have asked of him for their Souls and Bodies for themselves or for others that their Piety and Love to God may be thereby the more kindled and their Devotion excited that their Faith and Hope may be made more strong and lively They may take notice likewise of the Corrections and Chastisements wherewith God hath thought fit to exercise them that thereby they may be awakened from sin and made wiser and better for the time to come It will be very useful for them to have a Note in writing of those various particulars that they may on such days review them and with the more ease make such Reflections on them as tend to their improvement in real Piety Besides these Acts of Devotion which concern themselves immediately it will be fit on such days to make earnest and hearty Prayers to God for all Mankind for the Conversion of Jews Turks and Pagans For the Reformation of those Christian Countries that are corrupted with Superstition and Idolatry for Union amongst those that are divided in their Opinions about lesser matters for deliverance to those who are persecuted for Righteousness sake and for these Lands that God may inspire us with a Spirit of Peace of Love and of true Piety For our King and Queen for all Judges and Magistrates for all the Ministers of the Gospel for all their Frie nds and Relations for all their Enemies and for all who desire their Prayers of whom it is not unfit to keep a particular Note in writing that this Christian Office may be performed towards them with all faithfulness and kindness They are next to consider what may be done by them for the honour of God and the good of Men and are to resolve to do some Act or other of Piety or Charity which may be of real advantage to Mens Souls or Bodies One thing more I shall mention which may be very useful on such days and that is That they consider what are the things wherein they desire more earnestly the divine Assistance and Direction which they may write down distinctly that they may renew their Petitions therein every day And thereafter especially on such days as they appoint for more solemn Reflection and Humiliation they may consider what Answers God has been pleased to afford them These are a few General Heads on this Subject which may be of great advantage in order to the promoting of true Devotion But the designed brevity of this Treatise does not permit the enlarging upon them 10. Duty to observe what Providences they meet with and to acquaint them therewith in due time Lastly Consider what Providences they meet with what signal Mercies and Favours their merciful Father bestoweth upon them what Dangers and Hazards they have escaped wherein God's kindness and mighty power has appeared towards them in preserving them and keeping them alive Keep a Note thereof in writing that so when they come to be of age you may acquaint them therewith that they may therein read the loving kindness and tender Mercies of the Lord and his wonderful goodness and favour towards them and may be excited to be thankful and to put their trust and confidence in him whose Mercies are over all his Works But alas How far are most Parents from doing this Very few do any such thing for themselves the Mercies of God are renewed to them every morning they live at his cost and charge he gives them richly all things to enjoy all their good things are from him alone But how little do they consider and take notice of the Hand of God in those many and great benefits he loads them with every hour and moment They do not reflect upon the great and marvellous things that he does for them they live as if they were altogether insensible of God's mercies and loving kindnesses and no wonder if they take little thought to possess their Children with any Impressions of that whereof they have no sense themselves Some Directions to Parents how to render their Endeavours effectual Now to render your Admonitions and all other Endeavours effectual 1. They must give their Children good Example for the good of your Children First you must give them good Example when you bid them read or pray or partake of the Holy Sacrament or attend the publick Worship c. you must do so far as is needful and fit the same things your selves This will make your Admonitions successful Children learn more by the eye than by the ear If they see you do contrary to what you advise them they will be apt to think you do not believe what you say or that you are very cruel and unmerciful towards them to bind heavy burdens upon them and not to touch them your selves and if you should constrain your Children to do what you do not your selves what would it signify It would only make them Hypocrites and Dissemblers to do that which they have no heart unto and which they are not persuaded to be their Duty Such Children when once the restraint and force which is upon them is removed will be sure to give themselves the full swing in all manner of Folly they will do those things which they have seen in you and learned by your Example 2. They
jam viventem jam hominem jam matris officia implorantem Lam. 4.3 Even the Sea Monsters draw out the Breast they give Suck to their young ones And shall Women degenerate into such unnatural Barbarity towards their young as is not to be met with amongst the most savage Creatures Shall they whose love and tenderness has been so noted and admired prove unkind and cruel to the fruit of their own Womb 2ly When Children are fit for stronger Food 2. Duty about Childrens Diet. Parents are not to indulge them too much in gratifying the curiosity and daintiness of their Palate which not only is apt to make them too soft and tender but likewise disposeth them to gluttony and sensuality to make their Belly their God It is fit to accustom them to a plain and simple Diet which is generally more wholsom than that sort of Food which is very artifically prepared The State of all Humane Things is very uncertain they who have at present all manner of things in greatest plenty and variety may meet with changes and vicissitudes It 's therefore a part of the Wisdom of Parents to accustom their Children so far as their Health and strength can bear it to eat any sort of Food that so if God sees fit to change their outward condition and circumstances they may be the more fit and able to endure such an alteration Thirdly As to their Habit and Apparel 3. Duty about Childrens Apparel Parents ought to cloathe them decently but not gorgeously Fineries and Gayeties in Apparel are apt to make people especially younger persons vain and conceited to value themselves upon their gay Cloathing It is fit often to suggest to them that their Cloaths and Apparel are but borrowed Feathers and therefore that it is a great folly to be proud of that which is not their own but which they owe to the Sheep or Goats to the Worms or Bowels of the Earth It is not fit for Parents to make too great distinction among their Children as to their Apparel because this is apt to cause discontents and jealousies hatred and envy contentions and quarrellings amongst them Joseph's Coat of many Colours which his old Father Jacob gave him caused his Brothers to hate and envy him and at last to conspire most wickedly against him Gen. 37.3 4. c. The same is to be said as to their Diet and other things wherein it is no small part of the Wisdom of Parents not to shew too much fondness to one above all the rest This does not hinder but that Parents may to very good purpose give Rewards to their Children for their Acts of Virtue for their ready and chearful Obedience to their Commands for their diligence and care in performing what was appointed them c. Whereby they who do such things are encouraged and they who do not but are careless and negligent are punished and spurred up to amend their faults But when such marks of favour are bestowed 't is fit to let the rest know that if they do as well they also shall have a Reward By which means they will see that Virtue and Goodness are the things which their Parents love and esteem most and for which they are ready to bestow the marks of their affection The Duty of Parents as to the outward Estate of their Children A third thing that belongs to the care of Parents is the outward Estate of their Children First When they are fit for a Trade 1. Duty to chuse a fit Trâ—… them they ought to chuse an honest Employment for them To suffer them to live in Idleness is to ruin them If they have not some useful thing or other to take up their thoughts they are in great hazard of finding somewhat to do which is bad and hurtful both to themselves and others The Devil is always at hand to furnish Occasions to idle people for employing themselves to their own destruction As to the particular kind of Employment wherein Children are to spend their days it is to be left to the discretion and prudence of Parents They are so to instruct and dispose the minds of their Children that they may be ready to be determined to any Trade or manner of Life that 's honest which their Parents think best and meetest for them to follow But yet a great regard is to be had to the particular Genius and Inclination of Children which ordinarily disposeth them more for one sort of Employment than another It will make them more diligent in learning their Trade when they have a delight in it Otherwise if they are put forth to a Trade against their minds they are more likely to neglect it or to break off from it Seldom do such persons attain unto great perfection in their Employment who follow it against the grain 2. Duty about disposing of them in Marriage Secondly When they are fit for Marriage Parents are so to dispose of them as that in all likelyhood they may be happy in such a state of Life They are not to constrain them to marry against their will for such marriages are seldom happy they end too often in somewhat or other very Tragical and Calamitous to one or t'other party if not to both Great care is to be taken that there be not too great inequality of outward state and condition for that occasions often neglect and contempt of the person that is inferiour to the other in some external advantages Nor yet too great inequality of years for that doth likewise sooner or later cause an abatement and decay and sometimes an utter extinction of that Respect and Love which is necessary to make those who are married happy Parents are not in disposing of their Children in Marriage to govern themselves wholly by their respect to Riches and Honour but are to have a regard to Virtue and Goodness so far as to prefer one who is discreet and wise of a Virtuous and good disposition to another that is foolish or indiscreet and prophane and Atheistical tho' attended with greater degrees of Wealth and Earthly Honour What a great Reproach is it to our Religion to think that so many Parents in disposing of their Children only consider how much Wealth they may have and what Friends and Alliances they may make by marrying into such a Family or what Profits and Preferments may be expected thereby As for any other thing they do not much trouble their Heads about it They know no other happiness but in the things of this life and therefore they seek nothing else for their Children but to make them great and wealthy by which means it often comes to pass that they bring their Children into a most miserable and unhappy state of life in which they must pine away their days in sorrow and grief in the Company of foolish and wicked wretches who are often in a fury and rage who spend their time in gaming and drinking in Cursing and Swearing
in quarrelling and fighting in whoring and ranting and such like woful doings which cannot but prove to those who have any the least degree of real goodness so very uneasie and afflictive that Wealth and Riches can make no amends for them Such unfortunate persons cannot but often envy the happiness of those who are in a very poor and low estate and condition but yet live in peace and quietness in love and concord and in the fear of God and so enjoy-real satisfaction and contentment and have a great deal of Comfort to sweeten their outward Wants and Necessities Prov. 15.16 17. Better is little with the fear of the Lord than great Treasure and trouble therewith Better is a Dinner of Herbs where Love is than a stalled Ox and hatred therewith Thirdly Parents are to provide for them 3. Duty about providing somewhat that may be the foundation of their comfortable subsistance in the World if they can somewhat that may be a foundation for their Comfortable subsistance in the World which by the Blessing of God on their Callings may be improved towards their living decently and honestly Parents are not to propose to themselves the rendring their Children very Great and Rich But as they themselves having Food and Rayment are to be therewith content so if they can get Necessaries for their Children they ought to rest satisfied and be thankful Our life that is the happiness of our life doth not consist in the abundance of the things we possess Luke 12.15 Tho' you are thus to provide for your Children yet you are not out of too great thoughtfulness about the time to come to restrain your selves from doing all necessary Offices of Charity to the poor who do now stand in need of your help Never neglect a present Duty for fear of an uncertain inconvenience You are forbid to take thought for the Morrow Matth. 6.34 But you are required to do good to all Men while you have opportunity Gal. 6.10 To cast your Bread upon the Waters to give a Portion to seven as also unto eight because you know not what evil there may be in the Earth Eccles 11.1 2. This is the way to lay up Treasures for your Children to entail upon them great Blessings to make God their Guardian to leave them to his merciful and kind Providence and to his Almighty protection Ps 37.25 26. I have been young and now am old yet have I not seen the Righteous forsaken nor his Seed begging Bread He is ever merciful and lendeth and his Seed is Blessed So that by your Bounty and Charity you put forth your Money into God's hands who will not fail to repay it with Usury He that gives to the poor lendeth to the Lord. You thereby bring your Wares to a good Market The liberal Soul shall be made fat Prov. 11.25 He that gives to the poor shall not lack Prov. 28.27 and Deut. 15.10 it is written Thou shalt surely give him to wit thy poor Brother and thy heart shall not be grieved when thou givest unto him because that for this thing the Lord thy God shall bless thee in all thy Works and in all that thou puttest thine hands unto And in the Epistle to the Hebrews ch 6. v. 10. it is said God is not unrighteous to forget your work and labour of love which you have shewed towards his Name in that you have ministred to the Saints and do minister From all which it appears that Charity and Liberality are the best Husbandry As you are to beware lest your care for your Children make you neglect necessary Duties of Charity so you are to take heed lest you use any unlawful method to get Wealth to bestow upon them This is not a way to make them rich for such Riches seldom prosper There is a Curse which attends all unlawful Gain and like a Canker eats it out and consumes it All Ages and Places afford Examples which confirm this Observation Better saith Solomon Prov. 16.8 is a little with Righteousness than great Revenues without Right Thus I have shewed you what are the principal Duties you owe to the Souls and Bodies of your Children and what you are to do for them as to their outward Estate The above mentioned particulars earnestly recommended to Parents From what hath been said you may see what a weighty and difficult charge you have the sense whereof should excite you to beg of God earnestly every day that he would direct and assist you to perform the Duties that belong to Christian Parents That you may the better act your part 't is fit for you when you call your selves to an account about your Lives and Conversations to make enquiry particularly how you perform the Duties of Parents towards your Children as to their Souls their Bodies and Outward Concerns And if upon serious enquiry you find that you sincerely endeavour to do whatever you know your selves to be bound to do for them then bless and praise God who gives you both to will and to do according to his good pleasure Beg his pardon for those imperfections and defects that attend all Humane Actions Resolve to go on and not to grow weary in your Duty towards them that so they may be as happy in all respects as is possible for you by the help of God to make them But if upon enquiry you find that you have been very defective in your duty towards your Children that you have done very little good for their Souls and not what you should and might have done for their Bodies and outward Estate and that perhaps you have done them a great deal of hurt by your Evil Counsel and Prophane and Wretched Example that you have led them on in the Broad Way which leads to the Chambers of Death that you have robbed God who bestowed them on you of their Service and Obedience and have made them the Servants of Sin that you have contributed to the making them Heirs of Wrath Children of Disobedience who were made by their Baptism Children of God and Inheritors of the Kingdom of Heaven that you have done what tended to destroy eternally those Souls and Bodies which God intrusted with you that you might take care of them and do what you could to make them happy If I say upon enquiry into your hearts and lives you find your selves guilty of those things how great reason have you to be in bitterness and grief of Heart to weep and lament to abhor your selves in Dust and Ashes to confess and acknowledge your sins with great humility and contrition to implore the divine mercy and forgiveness with all earnestness for the sake of his dear Son to resolve and purpose sincerely to amend your ways and doings to beg grace from God that he would assist you that he would compass you about with his Salvation and never leave you nor forsake you Consider the particular things wherein you have hurt the Souls of your Children and
the Lord shall forgive her because her Father disallowed her Now if it be thus in a Father's power to disanul his Daughters rash Vow which she made to God how much more may we reckon it in his Power to disanul her rash and indiscreet promise made to Man of bestowing her self without her Parents allowance Can there be any thing more unjust more unkind more unthankful and more unnatural than for Children who have been brought up nourished and cherished by their Parents for whom all their care and pains have been bestowed to dispose of themselves in the most important affair of their lives without their knowledge or against their Will What a grief and trouble of heart must this needs be to their poor Parents As we see it was to Isaac and Rebekah Gen. 26.34 35. And Esau was forty years old when he took to Wife Judith the daughter of Beeri the Hittite and Bashemath the Daughter of Elon the Hittite which were a grief of mind to Isaac and to Rebekah As to such undutiful Children who do thus bestow themselves against their Parents will and consent it is very remarkable that they seldom live happily and comfortably they bring upon themselves very often a great deal of sorrow and trouble lasting misery and woe They live to eat the fruit of their foolish doings and wish when it is to little purpose that they had never done so mad and wicked a thing 5. Duty to submit to their Parents Reproofs and Chastenings Fifthly They are meekly and patiently to submit to their Reproofs to their Chastenings and Corrections It is a Power that God hath given Parents over their Children to correct and chasten them for their Faults This is necessary for Childrens good and therefore when Parents do correct them they ought not to be angry with them or grumble at their severity which they use for reforming of them much less are they to resist and rebel against them Heb. 12.9 We have had Fathers of our flesh which corrected us and we gave them reverence Yea tho' Parents sometimes exceed the bounds of prudence and discretion in chastising their Children tho' they indulge a little to their own Passion yet Children are bound patiently to bear and suffer their Corrections They are not to fly out into indecent and irreverent words and actions but with all the submission and respect that 's possible ought to endeavour to mitigate the wrath and passion of their angry Parents and afterwards they are to study all that ever they can to prevent their anger and displeasure by a most humble reverend and dutiful carriage How much may this serve to reprove those Against Rebellious Children who are so far from taking in good part their Parents correcting and chastening of them that they refuse to submit thereto They resist them and rebel against them Can there be any thing more unnatural and monstrous than to see those who owe their being to their Parents who have been brought up by them who have met with so many testimonies of a tender care and of great kindness to rise up against them to fly into the faces of those who are the Authors of their being to lift up their hand against them This is a sin of so crying a nature that he who was guilty thereof was to be put to death by the Law of Moses Exod. 21.15 He that smiteth his Father or his Mother shall be surely put to death How greatly does it aggravate this sin when Children have met with no severe nor unmerciful dealing from their Parents But have been treated by them with all that gentleness and kindness that was possible And yet for such Children to rise up against their Parents is a Crime of so black a nature that it is no wonder if the hand of God appear against them for it in a very signal manner as it did in the case of Absalom for whom his Father David had so great a fondness This unthankful and unnatural Son rose up against him and endeavoured by force and violence to pull him from the Throne and to usurp the Royal Dignity See how the hand of God appeared against him 2 Sam. 18.9 And Absalom met the Servants of David and Absalom rode upon a Mule and the Mule went under the thick Boughs of a great Oak and his Head caught hold of the Oak and he was taken up between the Heaven and the Earth and the Mule that was under him went away And ver 14. it is said that Joab took three darts in his hand and thrust them through the heart of Absalom while he was yet alive in the midst of the Oak And ver 15. Ten young Men that bare Joab's Armour compassed about and smote Absalom and slew him And ver 17. They took Absalom and cast him into a great Pit in the Wood and laid a very great heap of stones upon him This was done as a lasting Monument of Absalom's sin and shame and of God's righteous Judgment upon him 6. Duty to love their Parents and how they are to express their Love Sixthly Children ought to love their Parents and to express it by all those Offices which are in their Power to do for them by serving them readily by doing every thing that may make them well pleased by sympathizing with them in all their troubles by assisting them and doing all they can to make their Lives joyful and comfortable by shunning every thing that may grieve them or make them uneasie They ought to refuse no labour nor pains to do them service especially when they are sick and weak oppressed with the Burden of Old Age or poor and indigent under any sort of necessity whatsoever then ought Children to be very ready to help them to comfort and to encourage them to do all that they can to make their lives easie to them and to lighten their Burdens This is called 1 Tim. 1.4 A shewing Piety at home It is an act of Religion and Worship which God is well pleased with We see how Joseph nourished his Father and his Brethren and all his Fathers household with Bread Gen. 47.12 It was an old Roman Law Let Children relieve their Parents or be put in Prison How many Examples have there been amongst the Heathens of Eminent Piety towards Parents Such was that Act of her Valer. Max. l. 5. cap. 4. who when her Old Father was condemned to be put to death in Prison visited him often and gave him suck and so preserved him alive who otherwise must have dyed of Famine The like instance we meet with in the same Author Valer. Max. ibid. of a worthy Roman Daughter who did in the same manner preserve her Mother in Prison being condemned to dye When the Keeper of the Prison to whom the charge of putting her to death was committed found after some time that her Daughter kept her alive by giving her suck he was so affected with the greatness of the Daughters Compassion
a loving Son unto her He knew how great an affliction it would be to her to be deprived of the Comfort of his presence in the World he knew to how many necessities and wants she should be exposed by his leaving of her and therefore he gives it in charge to the beloved Disciple to do the Duty of a Son unto her to be to her in his stead to honour her to love her to serve her to take care of her and provide whatever might be fit for her This shews all Children what is their Duty towards their Parents to wit that they ought to take care of them so long as they live and are able to do it they ought with all respect and kindness to perform unto them all those Offices which the Laws of Nature and Christianity require Fourthly May not the Examples of some Heathens 4. Motive from the Examples of some Heathens which have already been mentioned excite Christian Children to perform their Duty to their Parents There are a great many more instances might be added to this purpose I shall only mention two The first is of the brave Coriolanus that Great Roman Commander who being very ill used by his Country-men fled to the Volscians who were at that time at War with the Romans Within a little time after his coming amongst them he was made General of their Forces in which Service he had great Success against the Romans gaining several Victories over them whereby he was encouraged to approach to the very Walls of Rome His Country-men were terribly alarmed with this so that they were forced to make humble Addresses to him to deprecate his displeasure but to no purpose They sent their Priests in their sacred Vestments but to as little Effect But no sooner did his Mother attended with his Wife and Children come to him but he submitted himself to her Now says he you have overcome me indeed when the intreaties of my Mother are added to yours tho' Rome deserve my hatred yet for my Mothers sake I will spare it and immediately he withdrew his Army A second Example is that of the worthy Athenian Captain Cimon who not being able to redeem the Corps of his Father which was arrested for Debt sold himself and became a Slave that his deceased Father's Body might be freed from that Arrest that was upon it and so might have honourable Burial This great Man was famous for his Noble and Valiant Exploits for his great courage and excellent Conduct in Military Affairs but there was not any thing for which he was so much admired and loved as for this wonderful instance of Affection and Respect to his Father May not such shining Patterns amongst the Pagans make many Christians ashamed who come so far short of them in their Duty and Obedience to their Parents Shall not they rise up in Judgment and condemn Christians who tho' they have a more excellent compleat and perfect Rule tho' they have a great deal more Light to direct them in their Duty to their Parents and tho' they have much greater assistances to enable them to perform their Duty do nevertheless carry themselves so undutifully and unchristianly as if they had never heard of the Gospel of Christ yea as if they had been born without any impressions of Natural Religion on their Minds whereby all Nations are so far instructed and enlightned as to acknowledge that to honour obey love serve and assist our Parents is a Duty of unquestionable and indispensible Obligation The Conclusion shewing how Children ought to improve what hath been said From what hath been said Children may see how great reason they have to perform all those offices of Love Honour and Subjection to their Parents that God requires of them It remains that they seriously and impartially consider what their practice has been and whether they have done those things which God requires them to do towards their Father and Mother That you may do this to good purpose it 's fit that you employ some time in looking back on your Lives in considering how you have honoured loved and obeyed your Parents that you may see whether you have carried your selves towards them in words and deeds as became good Children who have a sense of Religion or whether you have not dishonoured neglected and disobeyed them If upon Examination of your selves you find that you have done your Duty that you have sincerely endeavoured to obey them in all things that you have loved them heartily and payed them that Respect which you knew was due unto them Bless God who hath given you to will and to do according to his good pleasure But because there are defects and imperfections which cleave to our exactest performances therefore it is needful that you beg of God to forgive you wherein soever you have been faulty or defective in those Duties you owed them Consider what these defects and imperfections are and resolve to amend them and go on in doing every part of your Duty to them with greater exactness and with all that perfection that 's possible But if upon inquiry into your hearts and lives you find that you have been very faulty and defective in the Duties you owe to your Parents that you have neglected to do what you ought to have done that instead of honouring them you have dishonoured them you have slighted and despised them you have moâ—kâ—d and scorned them you have reviled and reproached them if instead of obeying them you find that you have been stubborn and disobedient to them you have refused to follow their Counsels and Admonitions you have done your own Will and followed your own vain humour and fancy in contempt of their Will if instead of submitting to their corrections and chastenings you have refused submission to them and perhaps have rebelled against them if instead of loving them you have hated them and wished and desired their death if instead of relieving them in their wants and supplying them with what was necessary for them you have wasted their substance by your riotous and extravagant Living you have put off all bowels of compassion and tenderness towards them it I say you find that you have thus carried your selves towards them in a way so contrary to your Duty how ought you to lament and mourn for your wickedness and folly How ought you to accuse your selves for your great iniquity and to aggravate your crimes by all just and fit considerations You may in this manner expostulate the case with your selves What a sad and unworthy Wretch am I who have thus dishonoured hated and disobeyed my dear Parents who are under God the Authors of my Being in the World to whom I owe that I am Who have proved so undutiful to them who took care of me when I could not take care of my self who fed and cloathed me who were at so great pains and charge for me who have employed so much of their time and strength
Strand 1690. Ephes V. 16. Redeeming the time because the days are evil OF all the outward Blessings The Introduction which God bestows upon us there is none so valuable and precious as our Time God bestows upon us his other Blessings in great variety and plenty but in this he seems to be more sparing for it is given us not in large proportions but as it were drop by drop one minute after another never two minutes together whenever he gives us one he takes away another And yet how strange is it to think that a great many spend their time in Vanity and Folly Time is to many like a dead Commodity they cannot tell what to do with it They are ready to throw it away for nothing or for that which is little better instead of improving and using it in virtuous and profitable actions and designs they waste it in trifling and vanity which is an Argument of the greatest Folly as on the other hand the right husbanding of Time is a great instance of true Wisdom The Apostle having exhorted the Ephesians to walk circumspectly The Text explained not as fools but as wise he immediately subjoins Redeeming the time Intimating thereby that there is no better way for us to shew our selves wise than by employing our time to good purpose Redeeming and buying it or as some read the words Buying the opportunity or a fit occasion and season for doing good It is a Metaphor taken from Merchants who when they have a great likelihood and probability of making considerable gain and advantage in buying and selling part with their pleasures or lesser cares and concerns that they may make a good bargain and purchase that which they greatly desire So the Christian the man that is good and wise ought to deny himself in his pleasures and outward delights or even in his ordinary affairs and concerns when he has any great prospect of doing somewhat considerable for the glory of God the good of his Neighbour and the benefit of his own Soul The Reason which the Apostle useth is Because the days are evil that is either bad and sinful full of wickedness and folly so that it is very hard and difficult then to be good when sin like a violent and impetuous torrent carries all down before it This ought to make you redeem all occasions of doing good that you may fortifie others in Virtue and Piety that you may rescue those that are carried down the stream by bad Example and may build up your selves in Holiness and that you may be made strong in the Lord and in the Power of his Might Or Because the days are evil may relate to the danger you are in through the fury and malice of your enemies who are ready to do you all the mischief that is in their power the sense whereof should make you improve all occasions of doing good not knowing how soon you may be deprived of your present happy opportunities and seasons for working How Time is to be redeemed The Design of this Discourse is to shew you First How you are to redeem your Time And Secondly To propose some Considerations to excite you to do so 1. Time to be redeemed from sleep First You are to redeem your Time from excessive and immoderate sleep It is necessary for all men to refresh their bodies with sleep and rest and the state of some mens bodies requires a great deal more than others so that no exact Rules can be given about the proportion of sleep that 's proper for every one Only in general it is fit that all persons redeem as much time from sleeping as the health of their bodies can permit that so they may employ part of that time to some good and useful purpose which they were wont to waste in the shadow of death as it were whereof sleep is the picture and representation In the ancient Church we find many were wont to rise up in the night to pray that so they might day and night keep alive in their Souls Divine impressions that they might preserve a relish and taste of heavenly and spiritual things that excellent Objects might not be removed too far out of their sight This is a practice which perhaps very few in these cold Countries are able safely to imitate especially at some times of the year The weakness and tenderness of some bodies makes it to them impracticable because it would render them unfit at other times not only for religious performances but for the other necessary actions of life Some likewise have so little time allowed them for their repose in the night that they cannot do this in their present circumstances As for such who are capable without any sort of inconvenience to follow this ancient Practice let them do it They want not sufficient Encouragement thereto if they consider that thereby they have the opportunity of flying as it were from these regions of darkness and misery of sin and folly unto those glorious regions of light and happiness of purity and perfection there to converse with God their chiefest Joy to behold his Face the light of his countenance to taste and see how good he is to walk with him to be satisfied with his Salvation to drink of those Rivers of unmixed pleasure which are in his Presence the streams whereof make glad the City of God As for those who are not able to deny themselves of their repose in the night season all that I shall say to them is this When at some times it pleaseth God to take away their sleep and to keep them awake let them redeem a few moments from vain thoughts by lifting up their Souls to God darting up some pious thoughts and fervent desires Heaven-wards reflecting on the Goodness and Love of God admiring his glorious Perfections calling to mind and considering his gracious Providences longing for and breathing after that happy state when they shall be placed above all the infirmities and frailties of the flesh and outward necessities above Sin and Satan and all their Enemies And after this they may again compose themselves to sleep This is a way to keep the Soul awake to entertain it in a way worthy of it to accustom it to the contemplation of excellent and divine Objects to keep Heaven always near its view and not to suffer the things of another life to be removed too far out of sight We see in what temper of mind the Spouse was Cant. 5.2 I sleep but my heart waketh Even amidst her repose and sleep her thoughts were running after her desirable and beloved Object which possessed her heart and filled her thoughts when she was awake And so it is with pious Souls sometimes when their thoughts have been much imployed and busied about spiritual and heavenly things in the day time they dream of them in the Night season Tho' they sleep yet their Heart waketh This watchful temper is an Excellent means to enrich
edifie your Brother and build up your selves in true Virtue The great matter is to know when you are to do so You must not every time when a sudden thought ariseth in your mind moving you to leave your Plough or your Trade and Calling and to give up your selves to some Acts of Religion and Devotion you must not I say presently set on this the stamp or seal of a Divine Inspiration and a Call from Heaven This if not taken heed to may lead you into great mistakes and errours and very dangerous delusions Sometimes Melancholy or other bodily Distempers may give occasion to a great many warm fancies and imaginations Therefore you are not to follow those private motions and inclinations if you are not some other way determined thereto by some concurring evidence of the hand of God For Example if when you are moved in your own mind to do some very good and pious work there happen about the same time an outward Call to do the same thing you may conclude there is somewhat extraordinary in this to determine you By an outward Call I do not mean any extraordinary Voice from Heaven that 's not to be expected but a Call by some good wise and discreet person who unexpectedly desires and invites you to do that which before his speaking of it to you you found your own heart moved and inclined you to In which case you have a very mighty encouragement both from the goodness and usefulness of the thing it self and from the Call and invitation which you have had from another of whose wisdom and piety you are sufficiently assured Tho' there be no more but this Call from Man it is of great weight to move you and to determine you in this manner to redeem your time from your ordinary labour when there is some extraordinary occasion of doing somewhat for the honour of God or the good of men Thus if at any time you are invited to comfort one that is in any great trouble of body or mind or in any other great distress and affliction if there be any thing in your power to do for the comfort and encouragement of such a person you ought to shew your readiness to do your utmost for his help and support You know not but the Lord may make use of you however weak and unfit you may think your selves to serve the designs of his Mercy and Love Likewise if you are called to reconcile those that are at variance to see if you can awaken a person from his sin and folly especially when the Lord's hand is upon him to give your Counsel and Advice in some extraordinary case where it is judged needful for you so to do In these and the like cases you ought chearfully to sacrifice your private gain and advantage and to let your lesser cares give place to those of a more publick and considerable nature These things you are only to do so far as the necessity of your own occasions will permit They who are setled in a Calling and have a Family are under a very strict obligation to take care of their Family and to mind their Calling and Employment they must not neglect those necessary Duties which God hath given them to do in their several stations The Scripture accounts them worse than Infidels who provide not for their House and those of their own Family But if the Circumstances of your affairs will permit you to comply with the Opportunities of performing some eminent acts of Piety and Zeal you ought not to neglect them God will not fail plentifully to reward your Love to him and your Zeal for his Glory Seventhly 7. Times to be redeemed from Idleness Redeem your time from idleness and an useless way of living in the World A great many do not waste much time in sleep in dressing and adorning of their bodies in eating and in drinking in gaming or in visiting and yet they waste their time But how in doing nothing in entertaining themselves with the vain imaginations of their foolish minds feeding on the Wind pursuing dreams and catching at shadows building Castles in the Air and sporting themselves with their own vain conceits and foolish fancies Their Eyes are as Solomon tells us in the ends of the Earth Prov. 17.24 They mind those things most which concern them least They busie themselves about what others say and do but do nothing themselves to any good purpose Some men are full of vain and useless contrivances wherewith they do indeed busie themselves But to what end When all their designs and vain contrivances are accomplished they are but as so many Spiders Webs only fit to catch flyes This is to be busie in Trifles to be imployed in doing as good as nothing Thus there be some who pursue a studious life night and day with a wonderful diligence but their studies being only in impertinent books and about designs of no use or perhaps of very bad use they gain nothing thereby yea so far are they from reaping any benefit by their great pains and labour that they are unspeakable losers they lose their time and sometimes they lose their Wealth and their Health if not their Reason and Understanding Consider first how unworthy this sort of life is of men and of Christians God hath made you to be useful to glorifie him to do good in the World to become daily more and more holy and religious to grow in grace and to perfect holiness in his fear and not to be like an useless log or an insignificant Cypher not to be barren and unfruitful in his Vineyard Strive therefore to live up to the end and design of your being in the World to improve your selves in Piety and Virtue to do somewhat that may be of real advantage to the Souls and Bodies of others Secondly consider how dangerous a thing it is to live an idle vain and unuseful life God hath promised Men his protection only when they are in the way of their Calling when they imploy themselves in that state of life wherein by his Providence he hath setled them in the World So the Psalmist instructs us Psal 91.11 He shall give his Angels charge over thee to keep thee in all thy ways that is in all honest and lawful undertakings and in all actions that belong to your Calling So that if you are idle and give up your selves to a lazy and useless manner of living in the World doing nothing that 's profitable to your selves or others you put your selves out of God's protection and thereby you give the Devil advantage over you and you lay your selves open to all his Temptations Thirdly Consider that the end of this idle and useless life is very sad Cast the unprofitable Servant into utter darkness there shall be weeping and gnashing of Teeth Math. 25.30 Not only shall wicked Servants be cast into utter darkness but also unprofitable Servants who hide their Talents in a Napkin that
evil speaking whispering and back-biting all foolish talking and jesting which are not convenient to be sober and temperate in all things to be just and sincere in all your dealings doing to others what you would have them do to you How great a work is it to overcome the World to despise its Pomps and Vanities not to be allured and charmed by its smiles nor yet frighted and cast down by its frowns not to suffer your selves to be possessed with the love of Riches to entertain just and fit opinions of the things of this World to consider them as vain uncertain and unsatisfactory enjoyments which are not capable to make you happy which are only so far to be desired as they are necessary in order to your accommodation and more easie subsistence in the World How hard is it to overcome the temptations of earthly pleasure and outward delights and not to suffer your minds to be too far transported by the love of them but to use even the most innocent pleasures with great moderation lest they lead the Soul captive and render it unfit for the true pleasures How hard is it to live in the World as Pilgrims and Strangers ought to do to pass through this Wilderness without much regarding it but fixing your eyes on the happy Land the heavenly Canaan which you ought to look on as your only Country How hard is it to escape the danger of the evil Manners and Customs which are in the World the many temptations which you have to vanity and folly to pride and passion to gluttony and drunkenness to luxury and sensuality and to other Vices by the bad Examples of your Friends Neighbours and other Acquaintances How great and difficult a work is it to resist the Devil to quench his fiery darts to reject his suggestions to discover his wiles and stratagems to watch against all his assaults and vigorously to oppose his temptations that you may overcome him and triumph over him Now this is the work you have to do For we wrestle not saith the Apostle Eph. 6.12 against flesh and blood but against principalities against powers against the rulers of the darkness of this world against spiritual wickedness in high places How hard and dangerous a Warfare must it needs be that makes it necessary for you to take the whole Armour of God that you may be able to withstand in the evil day and having done all to stand How hard a work is it to read and hear and meditate to examine your selves to pray to God and to praise him to partake of the holy Sacrament and to perform all other Acts of Devotion and Piety as you ought to do How great a work is it to love God above all things to love him with all your Soul and heart and with all your strength and might and to keep your selves in the Love of God that it may be in you a powerful Spring and Principle unto all good actions that you may be thereby sweetly constrained to do and to suffer whatever is his holy Will and Pleasure Is it not a great work to perform aright all those Duties which you are bound to do in your several relations and capacities To instruct to admonish to reprove and to comfort others and to do every thing you can for the good of mens Souls and bodies Let no man saith the Apostle 1 Cor. 10.24 seek his own but every man anothers wealth And Chap. 13.5 Charity seeketh not its own that is not only its own it seeketh not its own to the prejudice of another but it endeavours to promote the happiness and welfare of others The charitable person hath an eye to the good and benefit of other men as well as his own gain and advantage And besides all this you ought to have so much Zeal for the Glory of God and the good of Souls as to endeavour to do somewhat which may have a lasting effect and influence not only in the present time but in the time to come You ought to contrive by all means to propagate Religion to do somewhat which may bear fruit for the honour of your Maker and Redeemer when you are laid in the Grave From all which you may see what a great and difficult work you have to do in the World and how great need you have to redeem time and to lose as little of it as is possible How necessary is it for you to begin your work betimes and to be constant in the pursuit of it in the morning to sow your seed and in the evening not to withhold your hand What a madness is it to have your work to begin when your time is almost at an end When there are but a few sands in your Glass You have so long a Race to run and so much bad Way to pass through and who are so weak and have so little strength to stir one foot to do or say or think any thing that is good have you not great need to set out in good time and to continue unwearied in your course all the day that you may at last receive the glorious prize Ought you not forgetting those things that are behind and reaching forth unto those things which are before to press towards the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus Phil. 3.13 14. Arise therefore from your sloth and laziness and run and be not weary and walk and do not faint Pray to God to hold up your goings in his paths that your footsteps may not slide to strengthen your weak hands and confirm your feeble knees to draw you that you may run after him and follow him fully Beg of him that he may be at your right hand to direct and defend you that he may perfect his strength in your weakness and may give you in all things both to will and to do according to his good pleasure that when you meet with enemies in your way he may teach your hands to war and your fingers to fight and that his Grace may be sufficient for you 4. Motive from the Account you must give how you spend your Time Fourthly Consider that you must give an account of your time how you spend and employ it God hath appointed a day wherein he will judge the World in Righteousness by his Son Jesus Christ our Lord who is to come from Heaven very unexpectedly and suddenly in a most dreadful and terrible manner with Power and great Glory in the Clouds of Heaven in flaming fire with ten thousands of his holy Angels with a shout with the voice of the Archangel and with the Trump of God He shall send his Angels and they shall gather together his Elect from the four Winds from one end of Heaven to the other The Throne shall be set and all Nations shall be gathered before him The Books shall be opened and the hidden things of darkness shall be brought to light the counsels of the
ashamed afterwards when they grow sober Thirdly The uncertainty of these delights of Sense should dispose us sometimes to deny our selves and not to enslave our selves unto them and come under the tyranny of a curious and dainty Palate A change in our outward estate will be the less surprising to us when in time of plenty we now and then restrain and deny our selves in those pleasures which we have the opportunity to pursue in our eating and drinking 4. Time to be redeemed from Gaming Fourthly Redeem time from Gaming and Recreations Sometimes they are very needful to the Body for your health and to render you more fit for action and business But you must take care that your Divertisements and Recreations be first innocent and lawful and not contrary to the Rules and Principles of Christianity that they be not hurtful to your selves or others nor scandalous and offensive Let them not be such as those of wicked men of whom Solomon speaks Prov. 10.23 to whom it is a sport to do mischief and who make a mock of sin whose delight and divertisement is in saying things that are wicked and prophane to the hurt and grief of one or other The Philistines called for Samson when he was their Prisoner to make them sport Judg. 16.25 The Babylonians required a Song and mirth of the poor captive Jews saying Sing us one of the Songs of Sion Psal 137.3 They made it a sport to insult and to triumph over others in their distress they made themselves merry with the miseries of others Let your Divertisements and Recreations be used with moderation give not your selves liberty to go beyond due bounds neither as to time nor yet as to the proportion of money you play for There is unspeakable hurt and prejudice that comes from suffering your selves to be too far carried away by the fancy and humour of gaming and following your Sports and Pastimes This does insensibly expose you to the danger of poverty as Solomon tells us He that loveth pleasure shall be a poor man Prov. 21.17 This renders you unfit for all sacred and serious performances the mind being thereby filled with the images and reflections of what you said and heard of what you and others did at your Games Your hopes and your fears your joys and your uneasiness your victories and losses your surprises and disappointments your little debates and contentions your indignation and resentments and a great many other things too common at gaming so distract and fill your mind for a great while afterwards that when you would be serious and employ your selves to better purpose you cannot bring your minds to that fixedness and stayedness that is necessary you remain as it were drunk with your Pastimes and Divertisements your thoughts reel to and fro and cannot settle You have a great desire of returning again to your Recreations that you may gratifie your fancy and may gain more profit or praise and applause That you may not fall under those inconveniencies your best way is to keep out of such Company as makes Gaming their Business And if at any time it be fit for you to indulge your selves a little in gaming it will not be amiss that you set bounds to your selves both as to your time how long to play and as to the quantity of money you intend to play for that you may not either in one or t'other respect exceed those limits which Christian prudence requires It is very advisable either not at all to play for money which oft-times occasions great strivings and quarrellings or great uneasiness of thought or to play for so very little as may be next to nothing which may not afterwards occasion any uneasie reflections and dissatisfaction of mind And if at any time you be disposed and find it expedient to play for a little more than ordinary still observing the Rules of discretion and Christian prudence it would not be unfit to make it a condition in your Game that the Winner apply what he gains to some charitable use which you may either then expresly determine or you may resolve to give the money which shall be gained to some discreet and charitable person who will be sure to bestow it to good purpose As this would afford a great pleasure and joy to those who reap some fruit and benefit by your Recreation and Pastime so it would afford your selves a greater delight and satisfaction than otherwise you could expect by your Divertisements And besides this would prevent covetous desires and other evil passions and dispositions which usually attend those who game only or chiefly for profit and advantage As for those who are apt in gaming to be transported into violent passion and to break out into indecent heats it is necessary for such persons to give over all such Divertisements as use to cause this excessive fermentation of their Spirits and which put them upon the fret Or if at any time they think good to play at some Game they ought to do it in the presence of those who by their Authority are able to restrain them from every thing that is indecent and extravagant that by degrees they may get the victory over themselves and may habituate themselves to mildness and gentleness of Spirit and may be preserved from all the sad consequences of unruly passions 5. Time to be redeemed from Visiting Fifthly Redeem time from Visiting Too many throw away their time in making vain and unnecessary Visits employing themselves on these occasions in vain and impertinent chat and foolish talking and jesting which are not convenient in making their Observations and passing their Censures upon the Words and Actions the Modes and Customs of others in slandering and back-biting in sowing vain and false Reports in causing Jealousies and Contentions and doing other such like bad Offices Visiting is either good or bad according as it is managed In some cases it is very fit and necessary to visit your Friends and Neighbours to keep up thereby a friendly and neighbourly Correspondence to offer your help and service to them when there is need of it to sympathize with them when they are in any sort of trouble or distress and to assist them to bear their burdens whether of body or mind or outward estate Sometimes the Laws of Civility and Discretion require that you visit those who have witnessed great Civility and Respect towards you Sometimes the good Offices and generous Favours of some persons to you require that you should express your grateful sense of their kindness and generosity by all possible instances of affection and esteem and particularly by visiting of them now and then which is a very easie and a small return for those obligations they have laid upon you You must beware of visiting or frequenting the company of those who are very lewd and wicked by whose conversation you are in great danger of being corrupted whose example is ready to infect you When you
see a House marked for the Plague you are careful not to go into it you keep your selves at a good distance from it that you may not run the hazard of infection The Love which you have for life makes you do all you can to preserve it Ought you not then to be as careful to keep out of the company of prophane persons whose throat is an open sepulchre whose mouths are full of blasphemy and cursing whose breath is very infectious whose words and actions are full of most deadly poison whereby your Souls are in danger of being corrupted and destroyed for ever Enter not into the path of the wicked saith Solomon and go not in the way of evil men Avoid it pass not by it turn from it and pass away Prov. 4.14 15. And Chap. 5.8 He adviseth young men to remove their way far from the strange woman and not to come nigh the door of her house It is true sometimes your necessary affairs may oblige you to be in the company of very wicked persons This must needs happen especially if men have a great deal of business in the World But in this case when you are under this necessity of being in such company beware lest by word or deed you approve or countenance any thing that is bad and wicked in them and if you cannot do them good beware lest they do you hurt get away from them speedily like a Bird out of the snare of the Fowler Sometimes likewise your Relation wherein you stand to some persons or your Calling and Circumstances wherein God hath placed you may make it your Duty to be often with those who are very bad persons but then you ought to be First possessed with a great abhorrence of what is evil in them and in no manner to approve their sin and folly Have no Communion with their unfruitful works of darkness Secondly You ought to make use of all favourable opportunities to endeavour to make them better and to rescue them from their evil ways and doings If you observe these things you are not partakers with them in their sins and therefore God will not lay them to your charge If at any time atheistical and prophane persons follow after you and thrust themselves into your Company beware of them and shake off their Society unless you converse with them with a design to reform them and to bring them off from their evil practices and have ground to hope that you may do them good But when after having tryed twice or thrice to make them better you find you only cast Pearls before Swine and that there is more danger of getting hurt by them than of doing them good it is fit that you deal roundly and plainly with them and that you let them know that so long as they are no better you desire to be excused if you do not keep company with them Tho' plainness is very necessary in this case yet it is fit that it be tempered with all the discretion and sweetness that 's possible otherwise it may do more hurt than good Endeavour to make such persons sensible that you are only an Enemy to their Vices and that as for their persons you will be always ready to do them all good offices Secondly As you ought carefully to avoid the company of those who are prophane and atheistical persons so it is your interest as well as Duty to visit those who are good and religious They who feared the Lord saith Malachi ch 3.16 spake often one to another When you have the opportunity of enjoying the company of such persons make the best use of it that you can Consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works Heb. 10.24 Exhort one another daily Heb. 3.13 Admonish comfort and in a friendly and loving manner reprove one another as there is need Make use of one anothers Counsel and Advice in any thing that is doubtful and difficult By all discreet and prudent ways endeavour to learn some good and useful thing from good and wise persons with whom you have occasion to converse Counsel in the heart of a man saith Solomon is as deep waters but a man of understanding draws it out Prov. 20.5 Counsel that is a skill and dexterity to give good Advice and Counsel and to talk of things which tend to make men wiser and better This in the heart of a wise man is like deep waters that is it makes no great noise the wisest men being also the modestest and is not come at without some pains and some prudent Arts and Methods But a man of understanding draws it out that is by discreet and seasonable questions and other fit ways he gives his wise Friend an opportunity to discourse to communicate his thoughts and to discover his wisdom and experience Beware lest in good Company your Discourse vanish into air and smoak lest it be too trifling and about things vain and impertinent Let your words be seasoned with salt ministring grace to the hearers Col. 4.6 Endeavour to receive benefit from the Society of those who are good and wise and to do them good so far as you can by your Society It is true it is not only lawful but sometimes very convenient and necessary when virtuous and excellent persons meet together that they recreate and divert themselves a little by chearfulness and innocent mirth that thereby their minds may be made more fit for serious and sacred things Such is the state and condition of man while in the body that his Soul cannot be always employed about those things which are of a Divine and Spiritual Nature This vigour and strength of Soul is not perhaps attained to by any on this side the Grave However our care must be that the bent and inclination of our hearts be toward those things that are good and useful This must be our business our way and course to be good and to do good And as for our Recreations and Divertisements they must only be subservient to the other Sixthly 6. Time to be redeemed from worldly Business Redeem time from your ordinary cares and worldly business that you may do some great good for the glory of God and benefit of Mankind In the ordinary course of your lives you must mind the business of your Calling according to your setled and usual Method but then you are still to remember to let the concerns of your Soul take place and be preferred First seek the Kingdom of God and his Righteousness Mat. 6.33 At some times it is fit to deny your selves in the affairs and concerns of this life to leave off your ordinary work and labour for some time when your great Lord and Master affords you some extraordinary opportunity for doing good to your Christian Brother or to your own Souls Then you must sell things of lesser value that you may buy time for doing that which will make you rich in the true Riches that you may