Selected quad for the lemma: love_n

Word A	Word B	Word C	Word D	Occurrence	Frequency Band	MI	MI Band	Prominent
love_n	good_a	heart_n	see_v	5,823	5	3.2010	3	true

Text snippets containing the quad

ID	Title	Author	Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication)	STC	Words	Pages
A57118	Considerations concerning marriage the honour, duties, benefits, troubles of it whereto are added 1. directions in two particulars, 1. how they that have wives may be as if they had none, 2., how to prepare for parting with a dear yoke-fellow by death, or other-wife : 2. resolution of this case of conscience, whether a man may lawfully marry his wives sister? / by Edward Reyner ...	Reyner, Edward, 1600-1668.	1657 (1657)	Wing R1221; ESTC R3111	49,078	102

her own but her husband or better then her husband or shall a man love other mens wives or a woman love other womens husbands better then their own Peculiarity of Interest is a Ground of Speciality of love 3. 3 Union Ground of special love between them is union The Conjunction Husband and wise have one with another They two are in many respects as one person and so one together as they are not or should not be with any one besides in all the world to wit one flesh Gen. 2.24 as it were incarnated one to another Adam acknowledged this when God had made the woman for him and brought or maried her to him he said This is now bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh to shew his Thankfulnes to God and love to his wife Gen. 2.23 as wondering at Gods goodness to him therein Mariage is a moral conjunction of two persons so as Man and wife are in Law one flesh by Gods Ordinance It is the strictest bond of any relation and therfore a fellowship of the dearest amitie nearer then that between Parents and Children Though children have their flesh and bone from their Parents yet they are not one flesh with their Parents Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother and shall cleave unto his wise This Gen. 2.24 was the sanction of mariage All Society must be left that this between man and wife may be kept This is Pauls rule Let not the wise depart from her husband 1 Cor. 7.0.11 ●●●ach 2 16. and Let not the Husband put away his wife for God hates putting away The wife must be an individual companion of life The saying of the Philosopher that perfect friendship is onely between two is most true in this case between man and wife because they two are by mariage made one 4 Necessity The 4 Ground of spiritual love between them is Necessity of the one for the other even for their being as well as for their walking In both these respects we may understand that of the Apostle 1 Cor. 11.11 Neither is the man without the woman neither is the woman without the man in the Lord. The man is not without the woman nor can be because man now is conceived and born of a woman The woman is not without the man Job 14.1 because she is now begotten of man so that they are mutual Causes the one of the other The woman hath her Generation frō the man the man hath his conception and birth from the woman They cannot be much less be well the one without the other The Husband should look at his wife as Causa sine qua non a help he cannot well be without for God said It is not good that man should be alone and the woman should look at her husband under the same notion It is not good for the woman to be alone Therefore the husband should not insult over his wife because o● his superiority over her nor the wife be discouraged because of her inferiority or subjection to him because they have need the one of the other as fellowes to bear and draw in one yoke together Now mutual Necessity should breed mutual love between them What is so dear unto the wife as the childe of her Womb Isa 49 15. yet the husband should be dearer to her as E●kanah said to Hannah 1 Sam. 1.8 Am not I better to thee then ten sons 3 3 Common du●● is Communion Common duties between Husband and wife is communion which flowes from the union of their Persons by mariage for union is the ground of Communion or communication of their bodies souls goods and respects 1. 1 Of bodies Of their bodies by mutual benevolence performed by the one to the other 1. Gor. 7.3.4 2 By cohabitation 1 Pet. 3.7 or dwelling together unless it be for a time and upon necessary Occasions 3. by conjugal fidelity reserving themselves intirely and peculiarly proper the one for the other as Christ and his Church doth Hosea 3.3 2 2 Of souls Of their souls for the spiritual good of both The heart as well as the body should be common between Husband and wife One saith that both the body and the soul are united together in Mariage Conjugal love will make hearts advance together as well as bodies as amical love doth friends The Soul of Jonathan was knit with the Soul of David and Jonathan loved him as his own soul 1 Sam. 18.1 as lustful love makes the souls of unclean persons to cleave together as well as their bodies as Shechems soul clave to Dinah Jacobs daughter whom he defiled Gen. 34.3 1 Kings 11.3 and Solomon clave unto many strange women in love But I shall speak more of this Soul communion between maried persons in the fourth common duty 3 3. Of Gods Of their Goods and Estates labours and indeavours a joynt fruition thereof for mutual benefit and Comfort 4 4. Of respects to their kindred Also there should be a communion of due respect and loving kindness to the kindred and friends that pertain to either partie The Husband and Wife lie as corner-stones in the wall to joyn several alliances and kindreds together and ought to carry very respectfully to their Affinity contracted by Mariage Esau's wives offended greatly in grieving the hearts of their Husbands parents Gen. 26.35 4. 4. Furtherance of the salvation one of another Common duty is to further the salvation and soul good one of another as given of God to that end Husband and Wife should labour to gain one another to Christ and help one another to Heaven What knowest thou O wife saith Paul but thou mayest be a means to save thy Husband and wh●t knowest thou O man but thou mayest save thy wife However this ought to be the Serious indeavors of both If thou know not whether thou shalt yet try whether thou canst To this end Extend your desires and labours in three particulars 1 To heal infirmities the one seeth in the other as pride passion discontent folly vanity excess or the like Take the fittest Time when the parties may best be wrought upon it is aptest to take Impressions or is in a tractable ductile frame and chuse the best manner to doe it in a taking efficacious way Beg wisedom of God for it rightly to observe what is amisse in a yoke-fellow to heal it or to cover it Happy is that couple whom God makes Heaven of Spiritual Infirmities or Spiritual Physitians one to another The wife should be a second Conscience to her Husband a bosome Monitor to tell him privately of his faults to amend them 2 To increase Graces mutually and to incourage one another to the Exercise of them as of faith love patience of prudence piety charity sobriety and the like 3 To Excite and Encourage unto duties and to provoke one another unto good works and to quicken and sharpen or edge

Old Time the holy women who trusted in God and were in subjection to their own Husbands adorned themselves vers 5. 2. 1 Tim. 2.8 9 10. And good works I will saith Paul that women adorn themselves in modest apparel with shamefastness and sobriety not with broidered hair or gold pearls or costly aray But which become women professing Godliness with good works Both Paul and Peter are to be understood in a Comparative sense that womens adorning should be not so much in outward attire as in inward vertues or rather in the latter then in the former Even Godly women may wear Gold and jewels and precious things and good attire as Rebekah did the earring and bracelets which Abrahams servant put upon her Gen. 24.30 47. with these limitations 1. That these be sutable to their rank place and state and not costly above their ability and as the most wise godly grave women are habited 2 That they be without wantonness wastfulness or curious nicer●●s or new fangledness for fashion God visi●eth for strange apparel Zeph. 1.8 3 Without pride Vanity or Excess or thinking better of themselves for them 4 So that they place their chiefest fineness in their inward adornings rather then outward more in their Graces and good works then in their Garments and indeavour by the outward ornament of their bodies to set forth the inward beauty of their soules 2 2 Of behaviour Tit 2 3. Also modesty of behaviour to express the inward holiness of their hearts in sober deportment in countenance gesture and speech to open their mouths with discretion Prov. 31.26 Prov. 7.11 12 and 9.13 and bridle their tongues and not be as the harlot babling and clamorous who is as extravagant in her Tongue as in her feet Good wives should account meekness of spirit their chief ornament and take heed they be not either 1 Proud or imperious in their spirits speeches looks Carriage 2 Or unquiet turbulent impatient alway brawling or chiding Such wives are neither credit nor comfort to their husbands but a continual vexation Thorns in their sides and pricks in their eyes The contentions of a wife are a continual dropping 19. Prov. 13. and 27.15 Like rain that falls into all the rooms of a house which is very tedious and irksome Prov. 21.9.25.21 It is better to Aw●●● in the Corner of a house-top then with a ●rawling woman in a wide house Thus much concerning the particular duties of Husband to wife and of the wife to her Husband 2. Duties common to both 7. 2. Now follow the Duties Common to both husband and wife and to be performed by both or Exercised to or with or for both which are equally reciprocal and of like Obligation These are seven 1 Prayer 1. Prayer to God frequent and fervent both joyntly and severally for all mariage Graces and mariage Comforts Especially 1. For sutablenesse of Disposition that God would fashion your hearts alike 2. For wisdom to carry with most beauty amiableness and sw●●tness for the benefit and advantage comfort and encouragement one of another 3 For Gods presence with you in it and for Gods blessing upon it and that God would build you a house Psalm 127. by giving you hopeful children faithful servants blessed goods Let Husband and wife interest God much in their Mariage by prayer Reas 1 Because a Conjugal condition can be no more comfortable or satisfactory to us then God maketh it It will be an empty thing if God do not fill it and bitter if God do not sweeten it It is not the having of a Husband or a Wife but of God in them or with them that giveth content comfort and satisfaction We ought in all our wayes to acknowledge God especially in Mariage which is one of the chief of our wayes and a great Turn of our lives which concerns the future Comfort thereof 2 Because mercies got with prayer are got with a blessing and prove the sweetest mercies of all Prayer sanctifies Mariage 1 Tim 4.3 4. and makes the acts of it holy in manner and happy in end 2. 2 Love Tit. 2.4 Common duty is Conjugal love which is not proper to the Husband alone but should be mutual and reciprocal between them both To this end husband and wife ought to love one another 1 Chiefly for the grace of God the one seeth in the other that being unchangeable their love will be constant When Religion tieth the knot of affection between them it holds fast till death But when they love one another chiefly for other respects as beauty wealth or fulfilling the desires of the flesh c. when these are satisfied or fail love will cool 2. Really at their hearts or in sincerity For to dissemble affections and Counterfeit love and kindness will deprive them of the comfort and sweetnesse of mariage and make it in Time a burden and bitterness to them Sincere love knits their hearts as m●n joynes their hands together Else they will not cleave but sit loose and be ready to leave one another 4. Grounds of mutual love But there be four special Grounds of mutual love and deareness between Husband and wife scil Donation Propriety Union and Necessity 1. Donation They are special gifts bestowed by God the one upon the other 1 Donation Prov. 18.22 and 19.14 which should be a precious Endearment of one to other Thus they should look at themselves This is the woman God hath given to me to be a meet help for me above al the women in the world So this is that man God hath fited for me and given to me for a head and Guide above all other men in the world 2. 2 Propriety Propriety or the Mutual Interest they have by matrimony one in another They are one anothers Owne properly and peculiarly so as they are no bodies else and so as no person or thing in the world is their own for they are maried One to another so are they to no body to nothing besides The Apostle asserts this matrimonial interest in the 1. of Cor. 7.2 Let every man have his own wife and every woman have her own husband The wise hath not power of her own body but her husband nor the Husband hath power of his owne body but the wife so as not to account their own bodyes to be at their own disposal The wife is the Husband only one and he is hers They should be mutual darlings one to another because they are mutual Proprietors one of another by self resignation of each to other they give themselves mutual power one over another Now every one loveth his own best non quia pulchrum sed quia Suum his own Children his own goods his own house c. for propriety more then for beauty beause they are his own Shall a man love any thing that is his own but his wife or better then his wife or shall a wife love any thing that is

our selves as betrothed to him in righteousness and loving kindness mercy and faithfulness 2 2 To expect the love of a Husband from him To expect all that love kindness tenderness Comfort nourishings and cherishings from Christ spiritually Eph. 5.29 which the wife looks to receive from her Husband corporally As the spouse doth in the Canticles the kisses of his mouth Cant. 1.2 the Embraces of his arms cap. 2.6 the refreshments of his presence to sit under his shadow with great delights Cant. 2 3. Cordials and Refocillations to support and comfort the Soul in his absence this is to be staid with flagons and comforted with apples verse 5. Also the discovery of Christ to the soul for he hath promised I will manifest my self to you John 14.21 Will not the husband let his wife behold his face and the sence of his love shed abroad in the heart Rom. 5.5 Oh that is better then wine Cant. 1.2 The Communication of the seed of Grace this is the benevolence which Christ as a Husband renders to our souls 1 Cor. 7.3 to make them fruitful in good works We are maried unto Jesus Christ saith Paul that we should bring forth fruit unto God Hence the spouse saith Rom. 7.4 Cant. 1.16 Col. 1.10 Our bed is green This denotes the fruitfulness and flourishing of the soul in every good work by the spiritual Communion or heavenly Conjunction of Christ with the soul 3. 3. To perform our duty to him To express and perform all that duty spiritually to Christ which the wife doth corporally to her husband as subjection obedience love loyalty chastity serviceableness To reserve our hearts wholly solely intirely for him as his bed to lie in his Throne to rule in now the husbands bed and the Kings throne admit no Corrivals to be for him and not for another Hosea 3.3 to tarry many dayes for his gracious Return and manifestation of himself to our souls after his departures and Occultations of himself in our apprehensions from us to embrace and imbosom Christ and lay him between our breasts Micah 7 19 Cant. 1 13. as a bundle of mirrhe or perfumed bags To subject our desires to him and submit our wills to his that his will may be ours and there may be but one will between Christ and our soules to refer our selves wholly to be at his command and dispose To open our hearts unto him inviting and intreating him earnestly to come in and not onely to sup and lodge in them but to make his abode in and with our souls I opened to my beloved saith the spouse Cant. 5.5 To be sick of love for Christ as the spouse was Cant. 5.8 sick with grief for his absence and with desires of his presence and to seek him up and down as the spouse did Cant. 3.1 2 3. by night on our bed in private inquiries breathings and restless desires and pursuits after him and in the streetes and broad wayes of the ordinances and communion of saints and not to give over till we find him and having found him to hold him fast and not let him go to joyn ou●selves 1. Christ by faith and love to be one spirit with him he that is joyned to the Lord is one spirit saith Paul 1 Cor. 6 17 as Husband and wife are one flesh To leave father and mother yea wife and children house goods land all we have whatsoever is near or dear to us for Christs sake to follow Christ and to go to Christ which is best of all for us Phil. 1.23 This is the Law of the Churches mariage with Christ Psal 45.10 Hearken O daughter forget thine owne people and thy fathers house He that loveth father or mother son or daughter c. more then me saith Christ is not worthy of me Math 10.37 to have me to be the Husband of his soul Luk. 14.26 Christ requires we should leave all to cleave to him The Ap●stle in Ephes 5. describes the Union and amity of Christ and the spouse by the sameness of flesh which Mariage causeth between Husband and wife and reacheth maried persons their duties by the communion of Christ and the Church and the souls duty to Christ by the wives duty to her Husband This is to spiritualize mariage and to improve it to a high holy and heavenly use the benefit whereof w●●l extend to the days of Eternity What Expression of Conjugal love is there between man and wife which carieth not a resemblance of some spiritual intercourse between Christ and the soul 2. Benefit of mariage is Domestical the building of families and kindreds 2 Domestical Benefits of Mariage Ruth 4.11 and the multiplication of them Women are Builders hereof as well as men Rachel and Leah did build the house of Israel Indeed mariage is the fountain of all humane societies 3. Benefit is Political 3 Political Mariage laies the foundation of cities countreys nations of Lawes and civil goverment of Common-wealths and Kingdoms all these are superstructures upon Mariage also it furnisheth the same with useful and serviceable instruments That Mariage upholds the fabrick of the republick the continuation and succession thereof Hence it is cald the Seminary of the Common wealth 4. 4 Ecclesiastical Benefit of Mariage is Ecclesiastical the Propagation of the Church of God and of the tr●e religion to replenish it with members as it furnished Christ the head of it and Saviour of the world with a body on earth for he was conceived and born of a woman that was begotten in wedlock Mariage afforded flesh unto the Messiah and provides materials for Gods Church both stones and pillars and helps to fill heaven with heirs therefore Mariage is called the Seed plot and Nursery of the church 5. Benefit of Mariage is universal 5 Universal the preservation and increase of mankind this was the end of Adam and ●ves creation and Mariage before the fall and this was Gods benediction upon them Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth Gen. 1.28 Were it not for mariage the world would come to an end Hence mariage is called the pillar of the world under God the right hand of providence Vse 1 Thankfulnes to God Vse 1. This should teach us thankfulness to God 1. For providing so comfortable useful and beneficial a Relation or condition for us as mariage is It is a great bundle of Benefits How many both private and publick are bound up together in it as in one volume 2. For all the benefit help and comfort God hath given us particularly in our Mariage in and by our yoake fellowes What shall I render to the Lord may the Husband say for giving me such a meet and sutable help as I think there is None such for me may the wife say for giving me so great a blessing in a wise loving tender Husband may both Husband and wife say for blessing us with the fruit of