that I fare deliciously and am â—ayed more gloriously then if I were with â—rple scarlet and fine linnen 83. To do thy work O God is the wagâ— I desire and which will and shall ever coâ—tent me 84. Ah Lord I praise thee for that thoâ— hast given me a heart to be willing to paâ— from all things most willingly so I mighâ— part from all sin also 85. Dispose of all things as thou wilt â— God do but only leave me thy self in poâ—session 86. All good thoughts come in love â— God from thee to me but woe me mâ—serable me for that all evil thoughts comâ— from my self in hatred to thee 87. Good Lord make my heart and aâ— my thoughts such that I may be only sucâ— and always such as thou would'st have nâ— to be 88. Do thou O Christ live and reign bâ— thy power and might in me that the mighâ— power and reign of Sin may be cast out me 89. Let not the things of the Worlâ— put thee O Lord out of my mind nor sâ— out of my heart to abhor it 90. Give me O Lord grace and powâ— to Conquer and cast out all worldly lusts aâ— affections out of my heart that there be place for thee and thee only to dwell iâ— my sweet Jesus 91. Grant O Lord that I may esteem the â—orlds gifts without thee my Sâ—viour as â—e Devils gifts that will destroy me 92. Grant O Lord that I may ever beâ—eve and esteem my best duties and perforâ—ances as from my self to deserve noâ—ing but shame and confusion being but as â—lthy rags and a menstrous cloath and â—at I am less and less worth at the best then â—e least of all thy mercies 93. Nothing but thy blood O Lord can â—ash me nothing but thy death could satisâ—ie for me nothing but thy resurrection can â—aise me and nothing but thy living can â—hake me live 94. Let thy blessed Ordinances O Lord be more delightfull to me then my meat and drink and sweeter to my tast then the hony â—nd the hony-comb let them much more please me then the pleasures of Egypt which â—re but for a season 95. I had much rather have nothing of â—he world and hate it then all the world â—nd love it 96. I had rather be the poorest in the world then the richest as for my own good and profit alone 97. I am more afraid of honour then of dishonour of riches then of poverty of high degree then of low degree of applause then of contempt or scorn of health the of sicknesâ— and of my life then of my death yet I know that God is all and in all these therefore I will fear neither for I know thaâ— that which he giveth is the best and I shaâ— profit best by it 98. Ah that I had so much grace as to bâ— always able to meditate on the love anâ— sweetness that is in my Saviour I woulâ— not leave that blessed condition of Communion with him one hour to gain all thaâ— the world hath to give 99. Surely If I could always think oâ— my Saviour I would willingly always thinâ— on him I would not only have him in aâ— my thoughts but I would have him be aâ— my thoughts 100. One moments Communion with thâ— Spirit of grace were to be preferr'd incomparably above all the pleasures and sweets oâ— sin though their end were not bitter buâ— sweet 101. I would willingly lose all that â— have of the world if so be I could lose the thoughts of it likewise 102. I would much rather have not any thing of the world and be not of the world then have all it hath and be of it 103. I cannot be poorer then to have the world and love it nor richer then to be without the world and hate it 104. Though I cannot remember what I â—ould yet I remember well I never did or I do not do what I would 105. I had rather say nothing then my â—wn words when I speak by Prayer or any â—ther way unto God 106. Oh blessed Spirit Sanctifie my â—houghts and my words when I take upon â—e to speak unto the People of God 107. Oh sweet Jesus present I most humbly beseech thee my prayers and my self unto thy Father that he may receive â—nd accept of both through thy merits â—nd mediation 108. O God my God give me grace so â—o live as I may be always ready willing â—nd rejoyce to dye let thy time be my time whether it be sleeping or waking on thy day or on ours whil'st I am doing thy work or mine own thy time and thy will â—e done O Lord not mine 109. O Lord let me never leave sighing â—or sin till I leave sinning 110. Let sin O Lord be much more bitter unto me after repentance then it was sweet before repentance 111. Let me O Lord esteem any death much sweeter then the bitter life of any sin though it live but a moment in me 112. Give me O Lord any afflictiâ— unless that which I cannot bear sin 113. Let me live so long here O Lorâ— till I am utterly dead to all sin and sin deâ— to me and then Lord take me to thy sâ— when thou wilt that I may live for ever thee and with thee 114. O Lord though thou give me pâ—verty and Contempt with the grace of coâ—tent I shall be as rich and as honourabâ— as I desire 115. Take my thoughts O Lord froâ— the World and then take the world froâ— me as soon as thou wilt 116. Give me O Lord so much grace love thee that it may extinguish all othâ— loves that are in me 117. Make me O Lord thy Servant aâ— let me know it and I will never desire nâ— ask any other Honour or Condition 118. I would much rather have Christ me and doubt it then not in me and bâ—lieve it rather such true sorrow then suâ— false joy 119. If Christ were not in Heaven would not desire to be there my desiâ— should be to be where Christ should be 120. Let me so love thee O Lord as may always fear thee and so fear thee â— I may ever unfeignedly love thee let theâ— â—wo graces be never sever'd from me nor I â—rom them 121. Let no sin keep me from thee but â—et every and all sins drive me unto thee for I know that thou art a God pardoning all Sins and Blasphemies all iniquities and transgressions of such as repent and resolve to do so no more and I know that thou art my God and Father in Jesus Christ 122. Love me then so O Lord my God I humbly beseech thee in Jesus Christ as to keep me unspotted that is from sinning against thee either in thought word or deed wittingly or willingly 123. Let thy Mercies O Lord my Lord and my good God so draw me and thy Judgments so drive me as I may never be at rest nor quiet until I come to have quiet rest between thy breasts my dear my sweet and saving
Lord mine all and let â—e be thine all 225. Though I much fear and would â—t commit any sin yet I am not at all aâ—id of all the Sins I have committed 226. Though I know that God hates all â—s yet I much rejoyce that I was made a â—ner 227. Though I know that God justifies â—e ungodly yet I would not be ungodly 228. Though I know that grace doth aâ—ound more then sin yet I would not sin â—at grace may abound 229. Did I doubt of the pardon of my â—ns to have their pardon I would not â—hoose willingly to commit one sin 230. Ah Lord do not only pardon all â—y sins but give me grace to sin no more 231. Let me O Lord be â—s unwilling to â—ve in sin as to dye in sin 232. Let me fear as much the commitâ—ing of any sin as the punishment of all my sins I have committed fear sin before â—mitted as the punishment after commiâ— yea fear sin more then the punishmeâ— sin choose the punishment and not sin â—ther then sin and have no punishment 233. Let me hate sin most because sin and therefore most to be hated 234. Let me hate sin as much after â— doned as before and before commitâ— as after 235. Let me O Lord hate sin as tâ— lovest a sinner that would not sin 236. Let me be O Lord as unwilâ— to commit sin as thou art willing to parâ— them when committed 237. Let me even be as unwillingâ— commit any sin as thou O Lord â— willing to pardon all Sins 238. Let me O Lord die to all â— that I may live to all grace 239. Though O Lord I know tâ— thou pardonest all sins and transgressioâ— yet suffer me not willingly to choose â— commit any sin nor consent to any Trâ—gression 240. Let sin dye that grace may live Let grace live that sin may dyeâ— 241. Let Sin dye in me that thou maâ—est O Lord live in me 242. Let me dye to sin that I may Lord live to thee â—43 Let me O Lord dye to Sin whilst â—e that I may not dye in sin when I am â— â—44 Let me O Lord so dye here to â— that I may not dye hereafter for sin â—45 O Lord let me so dye as I may not â— Eternally â—46 Let sin O Lord be rooted out of â— that I may be rooted in thee and â— in me my sweet and saving Jesus â—47 Let me O Lord be so rooted in â— as I may never be rooted out of thee â—48 Let me Lord take such deep root That I may bring forth much fruit â—49 Let my Root be such in thee That my fruit be much to me Let my fruit be such to thee That the Fruit be like the Tree â—50 Let O Lord my death to Sin appear â—he appearance of the life of grace â—51 Let me O Lord so live as I may â—er dye but to Sin â—52 Let me O Lord so live to thee â— as I may ever live with thee and in â— hereafter â—53 Were not thy work O God the â—rk of my Salvation yet would I prefer it â— do it before that of my Salvation A Prayer AH most blessed Incomprehensible and â—nal Lord God Glorious in Holâ— fearfull in Praises doing wonders the â—vens are not pure in thy sight and yet thoâ— graciously pleased in Jesus Christ to look dâ— and to dwell in poor Man who is sinfull â— and Ashes thou livest only in the highest â—vens and in the lowest hearts the one is Kingdom of Glory the other of thy Grace â— Lord make my heart so low in my own esteeâ— it may be so high in thine that thou may'st â— it thy delight to dwell in it for ever Ah â— when I consider all that thou hast done for â— and all that I have done against thee I aâ— shamed and confusion seems to cover my facâ— Vail having O Lord transgrest all thy and just Laws and broken wilfully williâ— knowingly and presumptuously all thy Diâ— Commandments from the first to the last â— the greatest to the least as well by Commâ— as Omission as well by Actual sin as Origâ— sin knowingly as well as ignorantly both â— fully and willingly on thy days as well aâ— our days in thy house as in other houses inâ—ing thy work as in doing my own work inâ—ties as well as out of duties praying sins â— sins meditating sins Sermon sins and Saâ—ent sins so that my repentance must be reâ—ed off and my Prayers Prayed against eâ— my sighs and groans have need of tears â—ash them and my very tears of doubled â— How Lord have I made thy holy things unâ— unto my self and turned thy graces into â—tonness and quencht the motions of thy hoâ—irit by wilfulness how Lord have I treaâ—d up wrath against the day of wrath unto my â— soul and made thee a savour of death unto when thou comest as a Savour of life how â—e I Lord hated to be reformed and turnâ—rom thee when thou camest running towards in love and in mercy how have I cast thy â—ises behind my back and trampled thy preâ—s under my feet how many times have I â—ken my Promises Vows and Covenants â—e with thee in my straights with how much â—e eagerness and earnestness have I served â— sinful Lusts then thee in thy services my â—d Lord God! and how much more pains â—e I taken for earthly things then for heaâ—ly how much more delight some have these â—gs below and the remembrance of them â—en unto me then the things above how â—ch sweeter hath sin been to me then grace â—â— how have I bent my will against thy great â—â— holy will in all things how willingly and how fast O Lord did I run in the ways â—ternal destruction and how good Lord â— I vehemently delighted and laboured to â— others to commit the same sins and to dâ— same things how easily and how willingly â— believe the suggestions of the Devil and â— what willingness have I left thy work â— how often good Lord to do his nay wâ— is yet worse how often have I tempted him tempter to tempt me unto sin when I knew â— the wages of sin was death even Tempâ— Spiritual and Eternal for body and soul dâ— my very utmost to destroy both But what O Lord are all these sins those I do not to those I cannot remember â— that both for greatness and multitude yea wâ— are all the sins I have committed to thâ— would have committed had'st not thou in lâ— and in mercy O most gracious loving â— most mercifull Father in Jesus Christ â— strained me and come in continually unto help and succour even when I was altogetâ— helpless and succourless thou did'st O Loâ— own me when I would not own thee thou diâ— run after me when I did my utmost to run frâ— thee thou did'st O Lord continue knockiâ— when I would not open to thee and wert'st â—tented such was thy endearing loving love â— to me to stand at the door of my
wretchedness emptiness and nothingness how then O Lord am I able to know thee or to consider thee as thou art in thy self and how much thy goodness exceeds my badness thy wisdom my folly thy strength my weakness thy fulness my emptiness thine Almightiness my nothingness and yet how content am I though nothing or less worth then nothing yea to be turned even into nothing for thy sake But seeing O Lord thou hast in thy great goodness love and mercy made me thine make me now O Lord even what thou wilt and sent me whether thou wilt I am ready and willing to go and be and do and suffer yea to spend and to be spent for thee for thou knowest O Lord God if I desire to live it is to live to thee in thee and for thee to praise thee and for thy praise for to praise thee is to live and this to do only is the only desire I have to live for when I have thee Lord I have all that I desire and crave thy presence being my Heaven on Earth and thy absence my Hell having thee O Lord I have my all but wanting thee I want all that I would have thou only art able to content to satisfie and to please me but nothing but thee nothing out of thee nothing besides thee O my God yea all things besides thee cannot give me any true pleasure delight or contentment O give me then so thy self my sweet Jesus as I may be always with thee never without thee that I may wholly give up my self unto thee to be more holy like unto thee that my heart may be according to thine own heart and that thou may'st delight thine heart O Lord to set thine heart upon me and to make me thy delight thy joy and thy Crown of glory and to love me and to do me good even with that goodness of heart with thine own goodness wherewith thou lovest thine own that my will may in all things be conformable and made subject to thy will to will all that thou willest willingly and to nill all that thou nillest with the same willing will And grant O Lord that mine eyes may be always open to behold thee mine ears to hear thee my mouth to praise thee mine arms to imbrace thee my feet to run after thee and my heart heartily to love honour fear and adore thee so that all my members and faculties both in soul and body may be as instruments only to act thy motions that I may be out of love with all that I may be only in love with thee who art all love and only lovely my dear my sweet and saving Saviour Jesus Ah Lord God make me willing to give my self up unto the that did'st so willingly give up thy self for me and to be made like unto me that I might be made like unto thee thou rejoyced'st O Lord to come down from Heaven on Earth to lift me up from Earth into Heaven to live a mortal life on Earth that I might live an immortal life in Heaven to dye on Earth to free me from Eternal death and to give me Eternal life thou wert O Lord made subject to all infirmities on Earth to confirm and make me for ever free from them in Heaven seeing then thou wert O Lord willing to come to me in blood even through thine own blood to wash me out of my blood and to make me for ever clean Ah Lord wash not my hands and my feet only but my head and my heart out also even my bloody heart that hath delighted so much and so often to make thy innocent heart to bleed yea to shed the last drop of blood that was in thy heart Thou would'st O Christ thou would'st wear an ignominious Crown of Thornes here on earth that I might wear a glorious Crown of Glory hereafter in Heaven thou would'st O Christ thou would'st be whip'd that thy stripes might heal me thou would'st thou would'st O Christ be bound to loose me and set me free thou would'st O Christ thou would'st be accurst that I might be for ever blest thou would'st O Christ thou would'st have thine arms nail'd abroad to shew the breadth of thy love thy feet nail'd to shew the length of thy love and thy head pierst with Thorns to shew the height of thy love and thy heart opened with a spear to shew the depth of thy love Ah breadth length height and depth of love that such a God would be thus wounded to heal such a man as I am thus accurst to make me blest thus bound to make me free thus made an heir of misery to make me an heir of mercy thus to drink the dreggs of his Fathers Divine wrath that I might for ever drink in the streams and of the Ocean of his Divine love Ah love beyond degree an offended God thus dyes to set offending men free And thus hath God the Lord my Lord and my God freed me from Eternal pains and given me hopes here and assurance hereafter of Eternal joys he hath brought me out of the neither Hell into the upper Heaven of grace here which shall be glory hereafter he hath freed he hath freed me from Eternal death and purchased for me Eternal life he hath broken he hath broken the chains of sin by which Satan held me and led me captive at his will and doth lead me forth by and with the chains of his Eternal and everlasting love enabling me through grace to do his own holy will And what Lord shall I render unto thee for all these thy benefits thou Lord knowest my unabillity and my poverty I am I am I confess so poor yea so despicably poor O Lord as I have nothing to pay thee nor can pay thee nothing but what thou shalt give me give me then O Lord what thou wilt have me to give thee give me Oh give me I humbly beseech thee in Jesus Christ love to love thee fear to fear thee faith to believe in thee to depend on thee and to rowl my self upon thee hope to trust in thee and joy to rejoyce in thee with joy unspeakable Ah Lord God give me thy self yea all thy self that I may give thee all my self and though I do I confess already owe thee mine all yet I would willingly owe thee yet more and though I have nothing to pay thee yet I desire and heartily desire to owe the more to be more indebted unto thee for I delight to be thy great debtor yea and would be thy greatest and so I confess I should be though thou shouldest neither give nor forgive me any more then thou hast already forgiven and given me Ah Lord I know that for all thy gifts of grace mercy pardon and forgiveness that thou expecteth only an acknowledgement that I am thine all and that I owe thee my self and mine all the freedom Lord Ah Lord the freedom all the freedom all the freedom that I desire is to be thy
can be done by them but what thou pleasest and sufferest to be done Cause them and all thy people to know that having thee on their side and for them they need not fear who be against them for none ever fought against thy power and prospered and that though thou dost usually use means yet thou canst O God we know if thou so pleasest do thy work without means yea and against means and that there is no means so contemptible but thou canst O God our God make effectual even to the pulling down of strong holds as thou did'st the Walls of Jericho at the noise of Rams Horns it is as easie with thee to do what thou willest as to will it all things are as easie as possible let us not then O God fear any power no nor all powers having thee the Lord for our God before whom all the Nations of the earth are as the drop of a bucket and as the dust of the ballance Thou holdest O God the Ocean in the hollow of thine hand and the earth is upheld and standeth fast by the power of thy might give us then O Lord God such fear as may cause us to love thee and such love as may cast out and destroy all fear for thou only who art God only art to be feared only Ah Lord look down graciously and in mercy upon poor afflicted Scotland and Ireland stir up thy self and come and save them even now now when there is no help for them nigh at hand O Lord be thou their help and help thou them and give them grace to put their trust in thee that thou mayest be their help and deliverer of three Nations make us O Lord one people that we may be knit together with the bonds of love and unity serving thee O Lord with a perfect heart in holiness and righteousness all the days of our lives And though O Lord thou hast delivered them into our hands and given us power over them Ah Lord suffer us not to do other unto them than we would they should do unto us and that we lay not on them too heavy burthens to bear Bless O Lord I beseech thee all my kindred and acquaintance in the flesh Ah Lord I know that thou knowest all their soul and body cases Ah be thou pleased in Jesus Christ to come into their help and give them deliverance make O Lord make their hearts below their conditions and then make their conditions what thou wilt lay no more O Lord on them than thou shall be pleased to enable them to bear and then lay on them what thou wilt Ah Lord cause every thing to work together for their good let them always see and acknowledge that thou punishest them far less than their iniquities deserve and that all afflictions whatsoever come from thee but the procuring cause is in themselves make them O Lord as willing to wear the Cross here as the Crown hereafter to suffer for thee here as to reign with thee hereafter And though O Lord they be poor in the world let them be rich in grace though they be contemptible in the world let them be honourable in thy sight be thou O Lord their Portion and make them thine inheritance and grant O Lord I beseech thee that their last days may be their best days and their last thoughts their best thoughts that they may be thy faithfull humble and obedient Servants unto their lives end living the lives of the Righteous that they may be like them both in death and after death Be thou with them O Lord in all places and at all times that they may always sit under the shadow of thy wings and that the fruit of thy word may be pleasant unto the tast of their souls let them through grace delight to walk in the ways of thy Statutes and let thy Commandments be their daily talk suffer them not O Lord to go astray from thee either after the pleasures or profits of the world but inable them all through grace to walk uprightly and circumspectly before thee unto their lives end Be mindfull and mercifull O Lord unto all the Sons and Daughters of affliction wheresoever dispers'd wheresoever scattered on the face of the whole earth bring home O Lord all that are banisht deliver all Captives and set free all Prisoners that every one may sit under his Vine and rejoyce under his Fig-Tree eating in peace the fruits of their labours visit O Lord the sick comfort the comfortless bind up the broken heart heal the wounded heart give life to the dead heart give the grace of faith unto the doubting heart and of hope unto the despairing heart speak peace O Lord unto the disconsolated and afflicted heart give understanding memory sense and reason unto the distracted heart and those amongst them whom thou dost intend O Lord and hast appointed to take unto thy self let them see thine arms of love in mercy open and ready to receive them let them hear O Lord thy sweet and comfortable voyce speaking peace unto their Souls and saying Sons and Daughters be of good cheer your sins are forgiven you wash them O Lord with thy most dear and most pretious blood and sanctifie them with thy holy spirit of grace that they may appear spotless and unblameable before thee whiter than Snow purer than Wool finer than Gold and brighter than the Sun and make them O Lord more than Conquerours and those O Lord whom thou dost intend to restore unto their former health and strength give them grace to lead new lives and to become new Creatures that others seeing their good works may glorifie thee O God our Heavenly Father in Jesus Christ Ah Lord God look with much mercy I humbly beseech thee upon all those every where that suffer for the Peace of a good Conscience because they will not sin against thy truth keep them O Lord as the Apple of thine eye that nothing come nigh to hurt them nor to affright them let them depend on thy mercies fear thy judgments and lay hold on thy gracious promises give them O Lord courage and strength to fight that good fight and to run that good race that thou hast set before them that they may be always-willing and ready to give up their lives unto the death and then from thee O Lord they may receive the Crown of Eternal life And those O Lord that suffer for an evil Conscience because they have sinned against thy truth let them not always mourn as men and women without hope but pour down O Lord in much love and mercy pour down thy holy and blessed spirit the Comforter into their hearts that may speak peace unto their Souls even that peace that passeth all understanding let not the Mountains of their sins O Lord nor the Rocks of unbelief hinder thy mercies from coming down out of Heaven into their Hearts nor their Prayers from ascending up unto thee by faith but cause them O
things are so much out of him that is out of his heart out of his mind out of his memory out of his affections his desires his will his love or his liking that his joy is augmented greatly that they are so outed of him for then only he saith Now I have what I would have yea all that ever I did desire or crave for my God is to me all things and much better than all other things 50. Ah Lord bury me I most humbly beseech thee thus in thy self that I may be dead to all other things to all things out of thee and besides thee let me Ah let me so possess thee and be possest so by thee as I may only and always mind thee and have thee only and always in my mind Let love to all the pleasures of the flesh though lawful be low poor icy cold and frozen to me that I may flee from them all to be heated by the fire of thy love to live in those blessed Sacred flames which is the life I desire to live for out of them I cannot live as I would life is to me death and death would be a sweet life delivering me from many deaths 51. Suffer me not Ah suffer me not O Lord to love any thing else how lovely or lawful soever it may be if it hinder or lessen never so little my loving of thee but bet me only choose prize esteem and delight in thy love and to walk worthy of it by all well-pleasing rejoycing to do thy holy will with my whole heart mind and will 52. Such and so great is thy love and thy goodness O Lord that thou delightest to make us good and then delightest in our goodness thou delightest to give us grace and then delightest in our graces thou delightest to make us holy and then delightest in our holiness thou delightest to make us perfect and then thou delightest in our perfection thou delightest to make us obedient and then thou delightest in our obedience thou delightest to make us lovely and then thou takest delight in our loveliness thou delightest Ah thou delightest to make us such as thou wouldst have us to be and then thou takest great delight in the work of thine hands even in thine own handy-work 53. Ah our great most great God how greatly great is thy greatness How greatly good is thy goodness how greatly true is thy truth how greatly just is thy Justice how greatly mighty is thy might how greatly lovely is thy love how greatly beautiful is thy beautiful countenance how greatly Ah how greatly sweet are all thy Sweets how greatly delightful are all thy delights how pleasant Ah how pleasant are all thy pleasant things with thee O God is fulness of all joy unspeakable joy and from thy right hand flow pleasures for evermore 54. Ah the joys the joys even in this worlds joys when God is in them and comes with them and when in that therein alone we take and make all our joy 55. God many times is so gracious as he takes us napping that is gives us grace when we sought it not yea gives us himself many times when we seek him not when we think not of him 56. How doth he many times measure out unto us and shower down upon us such measure of mercy even when we never measured the sweetness nor the greatness of what we received much less of that which we did not of that which we could not expect 57. Ah how much above all things is our God even in the want of all things of all this worlds all that soul Ah that soul that hath him finds not nor cannot find any want at all 58. But wanting Ah wanting him in the midst of all we have nothing even nothing at all but want all even all in the very enjoyment of all this worlds all 59. O God our God thou fillest us many times so full that we even flow over with thy fulness even then many times when we see our selves find feel and know our selves most empty and many times thou causest us to bear and bring forth most fruit even then when we think and see our selves most barren we have thee O God we have thee many times most when we think that we have thee least and thou art nighest us when we think Ah when we think that thou art farthest off from us such a good God is our God 60. How much better is it to be a Lazarus to beg at a Dives's door than be a Dives and suffer a Lazarus to beg at our doors and not to give him of our goods 61. How much better is it to have nothing at â—ll of this worlds all then to have this worlds all and give of it Ah and to give of it unto others nothing at all 62. How much better is it to feed on thee O God and to have nothing else to feed on than to feed on all things else and not to taste of thee of thine own sweet blessed most blessed and most sweet self O God in Christ who art the souls only food by faith 63. Having thee O God we are soon filled yea feasted and solaced with all delicious dainties but feeding on all other things and not tasting O God of thy pleasant things they have all no taste at all 64. O God thou know'st I would most willingly be Ah most willingly I would be a child yea a very fool in wisdom for the world or of worldly wisdom for to get or keep earthly things to be an old man in Christ to learn know feel and keep spiritual things Ah if I could always walk talk and live in the Spirit and obey the Spirit I would account all other joys and wisdom very toyes and meer foolishness 65. To forget all things out of God and besides God and to mind him so as to have nothing else in my mind this Ah this is my longing desire and I trust it will continue in me through grace and augment untill I have all I would have which is my Christ my Christ who is my God 66. Take all this worlds all ye men of the world give me my God my God and I will never ask yours your God But yet I would that ye had mine that my God were your God that my Portion were all your Portion also and that we might be ever brethren 67. Let me Ah let me be blind as it were to see beauty in no beauty out of thee O Christ dumb to hear no voice but thine Ah the still sweet voice of thy Spirit and senseless to feel no pleasure but in those things O God as are pleasing pretious and dear in thy sight lame so as I may not walk after any other thing but thee my God my God so that I may be only thine and none but thine at all times and in all places companies and things 68. He that hath not tasted of the sweetness of God even of those sweet sweets
of my natural darkness which is darker than the blackest night and be also unto me a fire by day in the mid'st of thine own light in me which is clearer and brighter than the brightest day that I may burn O God in the Sacred and Divine flames of saving knowledge and obedience unto my lives end 16. Instruct me O Lord in thine own Laws and write them so upon my heart that I may never depart from them 17. Feast me and fill me O Lord so with thine own self that I may be all thine and thou all mine 18. It is the spirit of Christ or Christ in the Spirit which is perfect God living in us that Gal. 3. 27. makes us Christians which is to be like Christ to be Baptized in him to have put him on and this oneness with Christ God is in all the Saints all the Saints are thus one in God with Christ he in us and we in him MEDITATIONS ON DEATH HOW It appears to the Godly and to the Wicked after a great Sickness ALL happiness is in Christ and in possessing of him and there is no true happiness out of Christ All the whole world is much too little and too low to be compared to Christ and to the living in him Though he should want bread to eat and Cloaths to put on Christ I am sure alone will satisfie and truly please and content any man A naked Christ a poor Christ that is a Christ that shall bring nakedness and if as with Job Poverty and uncomliness he will be to a Soul that truly knows him the fairest of ten thousand without spot or wrinkle the only fair and beautiful the only desirable the whole and only desires the riches honour treasure and pleasure of all souls that truly know him A soul that truly knows Christ cannot live as he would without a farther knowledge of him living in him to have Communion and fellowship with him which is of more value to him and he prizeth it more than ten thousand worlds and lives Christ being above all things and more than all things much by much A Christians last hour is his best hour the hour of his Death is the best hour of all his life yea that hour is the true beginning of life for Death sin and Hell are swallowed up into Victory and the Devil totally and finally overcome Death is advantagious unto a Christian divers wayes when he dyes then he begins to live in the Lord who is the Lord of life and glory then he shall in a very great measure know feel and see the unspeakable love of God to him but I conceive not altogether so as it is in God that shall even surpass our knowledge there for we shall be swallowed up into it and be filled with it it shall contain us but we shall not be able to contain it and there shall we have continual and perfect love to love God perfectly and continually even as he would have us to love him which is the continual fulfilling the whole Law and which will make us of all things most like himself for God is love and surely it is the most lovely grace of all graces both on earth as well as in Heaven and so through grace I have found it Ah let us never then pray against Death which brings us these and a thousand more Heavenly advantages but rather be prepared to meet it with joy and embrace it as our best friend next to Christ Ah how sweet is Death even almost as Heaven to that soul that is housed in God and hath his peace made sure with him Death to such a soul is much better than any life Ah how sweet is Death to that soul that knows Heaven is prepared for him and finds and feels himself prepared for Heaven and sees his Saviour with his blessed arms spread abroad to welcome and embrace him and his glorious head bowed down to kiss him and he nigh him to receive him into his Everlasting Habitation of rest joy and peace Death at the worst is but a sweet sleep to the body to him that dyes in the Lord for he rests from all his labours but it is life to the soul and it shall ever live in and with the Lord of life and Glory I am sure to a good Christian that is such a one as is in some measure like Christ that lives and walks and doth as far as he is able as Christ did when he was here in the flesh the thoughts of death and its being not far off bring him the most joy next to the Glory of God and his interest in him by Christ Ah how sweet is death to that soul that knows himself to be long since dead to all sin Death is sweet to all such souls because he be-friends them so much as in a moment to house them in the blessed arms of their blessed Redeemer Christ Jesus Death is sweet to them that are in Christ because he carries them in a moment to live in his presence for ever and for ever and to enjoy him as he is to be enjoyed and to be made like him glorious as he is glorious though not so glorious Death is to all that are in Christ as Elijah's Chariot of fire which purifies them and expels all the remainder of Corruption that is within them that is by death all evil is done away we are no more capable of sin by death death is destroyed and life appears But Death to the wicked is the Devils Chariot sent from Hell to bring them quickly there as Jehu's Chariot it drives them furiously thither from whence none is able to deliver Death to the Godly is a Consuming fire to all their sins they shall not ever more be seen or remembred but it is a fire as from Gods Altar to purifie their graces and to make them shine more radiant than the Sun after death they shall in a moment be made perfectly pure and purely perfect and ever so abide But Death to the Wicked is that fire of Hell that shall consume all the good that ever they did so as it shall not nor cannot be seen nor remembred but it will make all the evil that ever they committed either in thought word or deed to be ever before the eyes of God and all the blessed in Heaven and before the Devils and all the damned and their own as if writ with a beam of the Sun Death to those that are in Christ brings them to hear that sweet and ever blessed voice of Christ himself come ye blessed inherit the Kingdom prepared for you from all Eternity and well done good and faithfulâ— Servant enter thou into the joy of thy Lord. But death to the Wicked will bring them in a moment for ever to hear that most doleful voice from the mouth of Christ go ye cursed with whom with the Devil and his Angels into everlasting burning into that fire that cannot be quenched which
ravishing joyes that God hath prepared and laid up for all those that truly love him I intend not to speak any thing touching thâ— method nor to crave the excuse of any for any thing that may not savour with them I know from whom I have received it and he I am sure will patronize and protect it and bless it in some measure I hope unto all that shall read it but whatever success it find I shall find I am sure all that I seek for which is peace within during this life and honour glory and immortality in the World to come which good Lord grant for Christ his sake unto all those that love thee anâ— wait for thine appearing And thus dear hearts I leave you to the guidance of the gooâ— Spirit of the Lord to direct you in all your thoughts and words that they and all your actions as well as mine may be now and always acceptable in his sight who is our Strength anâ— our Redeemer to him who is able to keep you from the hour of Temptation and to preservâ— you blameless unto the hour of his coming commit and commend you remaining In London Anno 1654. IN the Name of the most Holy Glorious and blessed Trinity God the Father God the Son and God the Holy Ghost one God blessed for ever to whom be given and ascribed as all due is and to none else Honour Glory Power Might Majesty Dominion and Thanksgiving by me and by the whole world of his Elect Now and for Evermore Amen Amen So be it Lord so be it THomas Arundell the poorest vilest basest and unworthiest of all the servants of the living God altogether unworthy of that most Worthy Glorious and right Honourable Title but trusting on his mercy and free Grace to be made worthy through the merits and worthiness of Jesus Christ and in him to be accounted worthy Doth in all humility of heart most humbly beg and implore his Divine Majesty in Jesus Christ to inspire bless and assist him with his holy Spirit that he may here following set down only the sincere breathings and longings of his soul in truth and sincerity of heart and that he may grow daily from one degree of grace unto another from step to step untill he come to that height and fulness of measure of holiness appointed by God in Jesus Christ who is the Fountain the Ocean and the fulness of all Happiness and Blessedness being God equal with the Father Blessed for ever and ever A Prayer O Most Holy most Glorious Eternal incomprehensible Lord God full of Grace and Truth Maker and Giver of all things both in Heaven and in Earth from all Eternity unto all Eternity thou art and there is none besides thee God blessed for ever and ever Thou givest O Lord freely fully and continually and art never weary nor repentest all our springs are in thee and from thee thou canst not increase nor diminish whatever is done for or against thee Ah Lord my God give me so much of thy self as I may be like unto thee in all things by grace here and in glory hereafter that I may stedfastly faithfully heedfully carefully and circumspectly do thy whole and holy will on earth until I come to glorifie thy Name in Heaven O Lord conform my will unto thy most holy and most blessed will that I may serve and please thee by all my thoughts words and actions not turning aside to the right hand of pleasures or to the left hand of profits Let thy most holy and most blessed Spirit teach me lead me guide me and so direct and govern me that the thoughts of my heart the words of my mouth and the works of my hands may be now and always acceptable in thy sight O Lord my Strength and my Redeemer O Lord that searchest all hearts and triest the Reins pondering all our actions be pleased in Jesus Christ to look down upon me poor vile sinfull dust and ashes the greatest of sinners and the very worst of the worst of men and for his sake wash away all my iniquities and purge me from all my sins and my transgressions known or unknown secret or revealed past present and to come and for the merits of that most dear and pretious bloud of thy dear and only Son which was I believe shed for me on the Cross O Lord grant that I may appear blameless and spotless before thy Throne of Grace and Justice at all times when I come before thee that thou mayest have delight in me and in all the works of my hands and mayest according to thy good promise graciously hear and answer my petitions and requests which I most humbly and unfeignedly desire may be framed in my heart by thy holy Spirit that they may be according to thy holy mind and will and find acceptation through the mediation and merits of thy dear only and beloved Son Jesus Christ the Righteous And grant O most mercifull and loving Father in Jesus Christ my Redeemer that I may set down from time to time the only Dictates of thy holy and most blessed Spirit unto my poor Soul not any head-notions but my very hearts frame and only desires and motions that they may both then and ever after refresh rejoyce glad and comfort me and cause me to bring forth fruit to newness and amendment of Life for the honour and glory of thy great Name and grant that I may ever renounce all merit or worthiness in my self for the very least of all thy mercies even for the crumbs that fall by thy providence from the Childrens Table Sure I am the more light I have from thee O Lord my God I shall the better and clearer see my own darkness the more I have of thy wisdom the better I shall see the foolishness of all worldly wisdom and the errours of my own ways the more I have of thee the less I shall have of my self the more thou shalt be pleased to give me the less I shall confess I deserve and the more thou shalt be pleased to lift me up the lower I will cast my self down Ah Lord God teach me to know my self that I may hate my self teach me to know thee rightly not in the History only but in the mystery also not only without but also within that I may love thee in fear and fear thee with true unfeigned sincere spotless love wean me O Lord from the World and the World's loves let me dye to the World and to all things in it that I may live to thee Ah take me from the world ere thou takest the world from me fit me for thy self ere thou takest me to thy self let my last days be my best days and my last thoughts my best thoughts let me not live one moment longer than to do thee service and let that only be my aim and my end let thy work be my wages and thy wages my work O Lord God in Jesus Christ I most humbly
beseech thee to perfect and accomplish that good work which thou hast begun in me for all my hope trust and confidence is in thee that thou wilt never leave me nor forsake me Ah Lord do not leave me to my self at any time for I shall undo in one moment all thy doings so great is my skill power strength mind and will to all evil against all good But O my God do thou continue to restrain my will and constrain it to thy will and to the faithfull and entire obedience of all thy Laws and divine Commandments Write thy Laws of grace in my heart and thy Statutes in my mind by the finger of thy holy Spirit and suffer me never through any temptation to depart from them but let them be a lanthorn to my feet and a light unto my paths to lead guide direct and govern me in the ways of righteousness and holiness that I may live the life of the righteous in the midst of this crooked froward and perverse generation Ah Lord suffer not the mountains of my sins nor the Rocks of unbelief to hinder thy mercies from descending into my Heart by thy holy Spirit nor my Prayers from ascending up unto thee by faith Let thy mercies draw me and thy judgements drive me that I may run and not grow weary that I may walk and not faint Be O Lord my God I most humbly beseech thee in Jesus Christ a savour of life unto life to my Soul and of death unto death to my sins and let thy holy and most blessed Spirit of grace that knoweth thy whole holy and sacred mind and will lead me teach me direct me and instruct me in all the things I shall take in hand to do and give me O Lord I beseech thee those things and those things only that may draw me nearer and nearer unto thy self to make me thine and only thine that I may be wholly thine holy thine always thine and ever thine that living here in thy fear I may dye in thy favour and after death be made partaker of Eternal Life through Jesus Christ my blessed and alone Saviour and Redeemer for whom I desire ever to bless thee as the Lord my Righteousness and to whom with thy glorious holy and sacred Majesty thy eternal and blessed Spirit of grace be given and ascribed by me and all thine as all due is Honour Glory Power Might Majesty Dominion and Thanksgiving Now and for Evermore Amen HEre follow my spiritual Soul-solaces Dictates or Gleanings of God's Spirit set down in order and from time to time as it shall please the Lord in his goodness love and mercy to frame and fit my heart unto With a Journal of several passages as shall hereafter befall me by Providence whereby I may as in a heavenly Looking-glass see know taste feel and be certainly assured of God's loving and mercifull dealing towards me and of my daily approach and bringing nearer and nearer unto my â—long wished and desired home of Heaven through and by the merits of my dear Saviour and Redeemer Jesus Christ there to sing for ever and ever Hallelujahs of Praise Glory and Thanksgiving unto his most Holy Blessed Eternal and Glorious Name Let O Lord the Meditations of my heart the Words of my mouth and the Works of my hands be ever acceptable in thy sight who art my Strength and my Redeemer SPIRITUAL MEDITATIONS Being the Gifts and Dictates of GOD's SPIRIT OR The Hearts Frame and Language that desires to be made Spiritual and to live spiritually 1. O God my God who art all things and givest all things freely willingly abundantly and continually therefore of thee in Jesus Christ do I humbly ask all things 2. Give me thy self O God and I will confess that I have all those things I ask 3. For unless thou givest me thy self I esteem that I have nothing though thou keepest nothing else from me 4. I know that there is no perfect perfection here and therefore we cannot live without sin but O most gracious and most mercifull Father lay them not to my charge but bury them all past present and to come in the grave of my blessed Saviour and Redeemer Jesus Christ 5. I will ever seek thee O God whom my soul loveth desire thee only and lay hold and depend on thee alone 6. Let O God the things of the world be unto me as I was unto thee whilst I was in the world out of thee even as a menstruous cloth and filthy rags 7. Thy mercies O God are the hid Treasures which my heart seeketh and longeth to enjoy 8. Thy love O Christ is much sweeter to my taste than the hony-comb and I desire it much more than gold yea above all the worlds treasure good and glory 9. I am sure I shall be able to rejoyce in and under any yea all afflictions if thou dost not afflict me O my God and my Father in Jesus Christ with thy absence 10. He is in heaven though on earth that doth truly love thee and only love thee and heaven is in him because thy love is in him because thou lovest him thy love O God being the Heaven of Heaven in Heaven the best of Heaven 11. Do unto me O God what thou wilt and do but only tell me that thou wilt it 12. Were I in hell for thy sake that is absent from thee I could and would rejoyce â—or it is my Heaven to please thee my God who hast and dost so much delight me 13. Let me be but esteemed in thy eyes Oh my Jesus my sweet my dear and preâ—ious dear delight and I shall not value â—ut contemn all the ill looks of all others eyes 14. I had much rather be a Paul a Job or a Lazarus than a Solomon be ignominious all my days and honour my God always than be honourable all my days and dishonour my God but one day 15. Of all afflictions O God my God let not sin be my affliction afflict me not with sin for sin 16. A wounded heart a heart wounded with sin who can bear 17. What burthen so intolerably heavy as the burthen of one sin only if the Lord lift it not up with one of his fingers 18. I ask nothing in Heaven or Earth but God in Christ 19. God in Christ is all things for all things out of Christ are to me nothing he is my joy and my Salvation 20. I had much rather methinks be ever afflicted than never afflicted whilst on earth 21. Though by thy free grace O God thou hast in love and mercy brought me home unto thee yet thou hast used affliction as the means therefore do I love and k 〈…〉 the Rod because thou hast appointed it 22. I love affliction because it was the hand by which thou did'st O God leaâ— me out of affliction that is out of sin 23. I love affliction because by it thou hast taught me to love thee yea so to love thee as I love
nothing in comparison oâ— thee but all things in subordination to thee 24. I love affliction because in it I saw thee in me and my self in thee 25. I love affliction because by it I saw that thou didst love me 26. I love affliction because it taught me to love thy Statutes to choose them imbrace them and delight in them 27. And I will love affliction because it will keep me in the ways of thy Statutes 28. I love afflictions because they are lovely and sent from thee the God of Love to me in Love 29. I love afflictions because thou hast sanctified them to me and me by them 30. I love affliction because since that I was deeply afflicted for sins I have not been afflicted with sins triumph nor with reign 31. I love afflictions because thou hast made them O God unto me lovely 32. I love afflictions because thou hast ever sweetned them unto me by Sanctification 33. I love afflictions because by them â—hou hast taught me how to bear afflictions 34. I love afflictions because by them â—hou hast taught me how to afflict my self â—hat is my flesh for sins afflictions 35. O my God give me what afflictions â—hou wilt so by them thou suffer me not to â—fflict thee who I know never took'st pleasure to afflict me 36. If I had not known afflictions meâ—hinks I had never sought to learn to know â—hee nor thy knowledge 37. If I had not been undone I may justly â—ear I had been for ever undone 38. Give me O Lord as many sanctified afflictions as thou pleasest for then in the midst of them I am sure I shall please thee 39. O Lord suffer not any affliction to afflict me with murmurings or repinings which I am sure will afflict thee 40. I desire ever to praise thee O Lord â—or that I never had affliction in the flesh to â—y remembrance but it brought me comâ—ort in the Spirit 41. So that I may say through grace â—y afflictions have been my best and choicest â—enedictions 42. So esteeming them give me O Lord his grace to esteem them as tokens and â—gns of grace 43. O Lord make me ever thankfull fâ—â— all these thy afflictions which deserve much thanks 44. O Lord I heartily thank thee for thâ— thou hast made my heart such as it do truly thank thee for them 45. Give me grace O Lord to will thâ— Will and to submit to all thy Wills will 46. Ah Lord give me grace to knoâ— thy Will a will to learn to know thy gracâ— 47. Thy glory is my glories end thâ— end is my glories aim 48. I desire no other honour O Lord than to have the honour to be thy Servant 49. I will rejoyce in any Condition sâ— may be in the Condition of thy Servant 50. O Lord I am willing to do any woâ—â— so it may be thy work 51. Thy glory O Lord is my only loâ—ing my only joy delight desire aim and enâ— 52. O Lord let me never be ashamed do thy work though never so mean in eyes of Men let it be always beautifâ— honourable and glorious to my eyes heâ— will and affections 53. Give me Christ O God on any terâ— and conditions and I will confess them be honourable terms and conditions advâ—tagious and glorious 54. I had much rather haye Communâ— with Christ in a Dungeon than be adorned and ever possess all Solomon's outward glory in a Palace 55. Communion with Christ will I am sure make me content in all places and conditions 56. In Christ I am sure there is fulness of joy and all true peace and comfort though without any of all the worlds comforts 57. In Christ there is all pleasure though in the World frowns disgrace and displeasures 58. In Christ there is true light though in the World dark Dungeons 59. Thy smiles O Christ my Christ are my Heaven and thy frowns let me never know for I fear them as the worst of Hell 60. Let me enjoy that Heaven and I care not for all other Hells 61. Ah sweet Jesus let thy will be my will that my will may be always according to thy will 62. Let nothing O Lord satisfie me but my assurance of being in thee and thou in me 63. Let me always O Lord meditate on thy love and mercies in loving me 64. Ah suffer not any thing in this world of this world to content or delight me unless thou be in it my sweet Jesus 65. O Lord grant that as often as I do sin I may sigh and sorrow for sin and earnestly desire to sin no more 66. Grant that I may set all my affectionâ— and love on thee my dear Saviour and Soveraign Lord who art the Father's Glory the Heaven of Heaven in Heaven 67. Grant O Lord who art my God and all my good that in all Conditions may abundantly rejoyce with true contentment and not at all to murmur or repine aâ— thy hand though heavy on me 68. Ah Lord be thou always all my thoughts all my joy and the only and alâ— the rejoycing of my heart 69. Grant that I may always love thee O my Lord more than my Life yea thaâ— the life that is the Salvation of my Soul 70. Grant O Lord that I may not so much by much labour for the joys oâ— Heaven to my self as to do thy will or earth in love only to thy self 71. Grant O Lord that all my solacâ— may be in uprightness of heart to serve thee 72. O Lord give me grace that whilst am on Earth I may labour to do thy will with my whole will as it is done in Heaven 73. Grant O Lord that I may every day yea all the day long have Communion with thee the Spirit of Grace my sole comforteâ— and only comfort 74. Grant that I may will nothing but thâ— will O thou my Father in Jesus Christ which art in Heaven 75. I had rather have thy smiles in Hell my sweet and dear Jesus if it could be â—en thy frowns in Heaven 76. I had much rather if it could be be Hell and obey God then in Heaven and against him 77. O God give me I most humbly beâ—ech thee for Jesus Christ his sake those â—ings and those things only both for soul â—d body on earth that may prepare me â—d make me fittest for Heaven 78. I had much rather choose death â—en choose to sin 79. Though I cannot live without sin â—re yet whilst I live here suffer me not O â—od at any time to consent unto sin 80. I do believe that Christ Jesus is my Jeâ—â—s and my Christ and that he makes interâ—ssion for me every moment and ever will â—en to my very last moment 81. I had much rather enjoy affliction â—ith enjoying thee O my Saviour then all â—anner of prosperity if thou do'st not prosâ—r it 82. As long O God as thou givest me â—ead water and grace I will acknowledge â—t I have sufficient meat drink and rayâ—ent yea
heart wiâ— out untill thy locks were wet with the dewâ— â—aven and when I was most pitiless then â—'st thou most pity me and took'st me from â— self and out of the power of all my adverâ—ies and did'st enter with forceable possession â—o my heart there to lodge sup and dwell â— ever tho' thou foundest it to be more unâ—an then a dunghill and is not this enough â—cause all the Creatures in Heaven and Earth â— stand amazed and with wonder and aâ—ishment to admire the condescension of so great God as thou art Ah Lord God what could I more desire nay â—at couldst thou do more for me then thou hast â—e to bring me out of the death of sin to the â— of grace out of the suburbs of Hell into â— suburbs of Heaven methinks Ah me â—ks I may truely say out of Hell it self â— Heaven it self such a vast difference there â— such a blessed and glorious change there is â—eady blessed and ever magnified and praisâ—e thy ever blessed great and most gloriâ— name of Jehovah my strength and my â—tion Thou hast not only O Lord delivered me â— of the pawes of that roaring Lyon the â—il who had almost devoured me but hast â—en me of thine own power and strength to â— come him to trample him under my feet â— to despite him to his very face thou hast â—vered unto me his falseness and malice and the wickedness and the deceitfulness of my â— deceitfull wicked heart thâ—â— did thus beâ— me Ah Lord what can I such a poor wretcâ— I am render unto thee for all thy benefits I a worm and no man the greatest and â— chiefest of sinners the very worst of the â— of men O Lord accept of what I have to gâ— thee of these two poor mites my soul and bâ— true O Lord I confess and acknowledge â— they are not worthy to be put into thy â— Treasury but if thou wilt be pleased to stâ— on them the glorious Image of thy Son Jâ— Christ I am sure they will pass for our â—coyn in thy Heavenly Court and thou â— own self wilt esteem them of thy peculiar Tâ— sure O Lord set me as a seal upon thy â— and let thy love be setled upon mine tâ— may be out of love with all that I may beâ—ly in love with thee and let all my menâ— and faoulties be but as instruments to act holy and blessed motions Ah Lord God good as great and greâ— good when wilt thou by thine Almighty pâ—utterly destroy and root out all sin out of me â— shall the time O Lord come that it shaâ— Crucified unto me and I unto it when shalâ— time come that I shall see it no more when the time come that thou wilt O Lord givâ— a finall Victory over it and totally destrâ— â—hen Lord shall come that blessed day whereâ— I shall not sin when I shall put off sin as an â— garment and never more put it on when â— tears fears sighs and groans for sins â—ll be expell'd and extinguished when thou O â—rd my sweet and blessed Jesus shalt only be â— all and my all But grant good Lord though sin be in my â—rt that my heart be not in sin and though â— rule over me as a Tyrant let it Ah let it â—ver raign in me a moment as a Soveraign â—d though I cannot live without sin yet good â—rd for thy goodness sake let me live without â—senting unto delighting in or approving of â—y sin whatsoever either in thought word or â—d but let there be always and continually in â— a heedfull watchfull carefull circumâ—ct care though temptations fall on me let â— not fall into temptation but deliver me â—m all evill O thou my Father which art in â—aven and cause me to work out my Salvaâ—n with fear and trembling and to labour â—re and more to make my calling and election â—e before I go hence and be no more seen And knowing Lord that thou hast in the â—ndance of thy love and mercy provided for â— a Kingdom which cannot be shaken let me â—ve grace in my heart to come before thee and worship thee the true God wâ—â—h reverence â—d godly fear that I may always run and not grow weary and walk and not faint wâ— O Lord all thy Laws of grace in my hâ— and thy Statutes of Love in my mind by finger of thy holy and blessed Spirit that I never go astray to the right hand of pleasâ— or to the left hand of profits wean me O Lâ— from the world e're thou take me out of world and whilst I do live in the world me be dead to it and to all the things of which are the honours riches and pleaâ— thereof the lust of the flesh the lust of the and the pride of life and give me those thâ— and those things only which may make thine and onely thine that I may be alâ— thine and ever thine Teach me O Lord to use the world â— I used it not that I may not abuse it my nor thee who hast given it me to use but â— abuse give me O Lord I humbly beseech in Jesus Christ grace to be always minâ— of my last end and of the reckoning thâ— must make before thee the judge of Heâ— and Earth take away all my doubts â— and cares for the things of this life that I cast all my care on thee who carest for for the earth is thine and the fulness tâ— of grant O Lord that I may know hoâ— want and how to abound and to be alâ— content in all conditions knowing that things shall be for my greatest good and â—ugh affliction be in the night yet joy shall me in the morning grant O Lord I beseech â—ee that my last thoughts may be my best â—ughts and my last days O Lord my best â—ys grant O Lord that I may be willing lose all to gain thee and to esteem it no loss â—t great gain grant that I may be willing to â—crease that thou maist O Lord increase to â—nd and to be spent for thee and to follow â—ee the Lamb of Righteousness wheresoever â—ou goest grant that I may be as willing to â—ear the Crown of Thorns to obey thee here the Crown of Glory to praise thee hereafter â—d grant O Lord that I may be as willing suffer for thy glory as to raign with thee in â—ory and that I may desire Heaven much â—ore for thee then thee for Heaven Ah Lord I could be content with Mary to â—t at thy feet and to wash them with my tears â—nd to stand behind thee being altogether aâ—amed to come before thee how willingly â— Lord how willingly do I with Jeremy wish â—hat my head were a Fountain of water that â—ine eyes might gush out Rivers of Tears and Ah that I could with David weep continually with Magdalen abundantly and with â—eâ—er bitterly that I might give my soul no rest â—ntill I come into thy blessed Arms the blesâ—ed joyfull
not who would not be content to be contemptible for a little space to be thus honoured and made truly honourable for ever Ah who would not who would not be right well content to be banisht for a while to be thus brought home in triumph gloriously to abide in his Fathers house for ever who would not Ah who would not be well content and rejoyce to be a stranger and a Pilgrim for a little while in a strange land to have such a possession for ever who would not Ah who is there that would not be in a storm for a while to enjoy for ever such a calm who would not who would not want the delicacies of Egypt for a while to have the delicacies of Heaven for ever who would not Ah who is there that would not refuse to be called the Son of Pharaoh's Daughter for a while to be the Son of the Eternal living loving blessed God for ever and for ever Ah who would not who would not willingly and cheerfully suffer with the Children of God for a while for a little space to raign with the Children of God for ever who would not Ah who would not willingly be cloathed with raggs for a while to wear for ever such glorious robes who would not Ah who is he that would not be Crowned with Thorns for a moment to be Crowned with such a Crown of glory for ever Ah who would not who would not bear the Cross here till death that he may for ever wear the Crown of immortal life Ah who would not who would not suffer with Christ here to raign with Christ for ever hereafter Ah who would not who would not be despised among men to be cherished among Angels Ah who would not who would not suffer as Lazarus did to raign as Lazarus doth Ah who would not who would not suffer as a member of Christs mystical body here to be a member of his glorious body for ever hereafter Ah who would not who would not live the life of the righteous here to live for ever and ever with the righteous hereafter not in the bosome of Abraham but in the bosome of Abraham's Isaac's and Jacob's Gods In the mean time O Lord give me grace courage and strength to run that good race to fight that good fight that thou hast set before me perseveringly unto the end that I may as willingly wear the Crown of Thorns here for thy sake as the Crown of glory hereafter for my own sake that I may be as willingly under temptation here as to be freed from temptation hereafter that for thy sake O Lord I may as willingly be contemptible here as honourable hereafter that I may as willingly suffer O Lord for thee here as raign with thee hereafter and that in all sufferings my only joy may be that I shall for ever enjoy thee But Ah Lord God what am I and what is there in me and therefore what am I able to do for thee or to render unto thee for this thy love which far surpasseth the love of Women Men or of Angels as there was never sorrow like to thy sorrow so there was never love like to thy love true it is O Lord for all this thy love thou requirest nothing but love again Ah how fain would I love thee but I cannot as I would how much less then is it then I should when I would do good evil is present and I do the evil many times which I would not but do not cannot do the good which I would to will is many times present but how to perform I know not but thanks be unto God through our Lord Jesus Christ though with my flesh I serve the law of sin yet with my mind I serve the law of God Grant then O sweet Jesus and give me grace that I may love thee as thou hast loved me and do for thee as thou hast done for me and to this end make my heart upright before thee even according to thine own heart that it may no longer be mine own but thine own that I may be only thine wholly thine holy thine always thine and ever thine that thou in me and I in thee may from sin be ever free Teach me O Lord so to number my days that I may apply my heart unto Wisdom that I may be always mindfull of my last end and of the reckoning that I must then make before thee the Judge of Heaven and Earth Ah Lord suffer me not any longer to walk after the devices of mine own decitfull evil heart but grant O God by thy power I may have power to do and walk uprightly before thee in all thy paths and that I may never more swerve nor turn aside out of the way of thy Commandments either to the right hand of pleasures or to the left hand of profits Give me grace O Lord God I most humbly beseech thee in Jesus Christ to see mine own badness and thy goodness ready and willing to make me good that I may see mine own emptiness and thy fulness ready to fill me mine own nakedness and thy robes to cover and cloath me mine own sinfulness and thy righteousness to make me righteous mine own cursedness and thy blessedness to make me blessed my own deformity and ugliness and thy beautifulness to make me beautifull my own slavery and thy freedom and freeness to make me free mine own unworthyness and thy worthyness to make me worthy mine own insufficiency and thine al-sufficiency mine own demerit and thy merit mine own disobedience and thine obedience mine own nothingness yea altogether nothing and thine Almightiness yea altogether all things for in thee are all things from thee come all things and by thee O God all things are and were created I do most unfeignedly confess O Lord that I am unable and unfit to speak unto thee and as unworthy to hear thee speak unto me for in me that is in my flesh there is no good I am all evil only evil and continually evil but in thee O God dwelleth all good for thou art all good only good and continually dost good without thee I can say nothing think nothing nor do nothing that is good suffer me not therefore O Lord I beseech thee to speak in my own wisdom for that would be but the wisdom of words but let me O Lord speak in thy wisdom which will be the words of wisdom and Wisdoms words Let me not O Lord go forth in my own strength against any Temptation for I am so weak I should be overcome and fall into any Temptation but let thy strength thy power thy might and thy love O Lord be seen in my weakness to strengthen me and by thy power powerfully working in me I may overcome and trample under my feet all the strength and power of all my adversaries and enemies Devils lust worlds lusts and self-lusts Ah Lord God suffer me not to go from thee for thou hast the
earthly Heaven may be a Heaven in part though not a perfect Heaven and that I may from day to day grow and increase from one degree of grace unto another until I come to enjoy that measure and fulness that thou hast O Lord my God in the infiniteness and eternity of thy love goodness and mercy through thy free grace in Jesus Christ reserved provided and appointed for me out of thine own abundant and overflowing fulness for with thee is fulness of joy and at thy right hand are pleasures for evermore Ah Lord for thy Mercies sake bring me unto that fulness that I may for ever rejoyce in that joy which bringeth such peace as passeth all understanding which eye hath not seen ear hath not heard neither hath it ever entred into the heart of man to conceive Ah Lord bring me into that Heaven and in the mean time let Heaven be in me for holiness is Heaven and Heaven is holiness therefore the more holiness is in us the more Heaven is in us yea the happiness in Heaven which is God himself Father Son and Holy Ghost three persons but one God Grant O Lord I most humbly beseech thee that I may do the work of my generation and lawfull calling prudently wisely justly and uprightly faithfully obedientlâ— circumspectly cheerfully willingly and perseveringly both before thee O God and before all men giving every man his due and doing unto all men as I would they should do unto me without respect of persons and let me always value and esteem these things below as low things as temporal inferior good things as common mercies of the left-hand of the foot-stool the nether Springs even such O Lord as thou givest unto all even unto the evil and wicked as well as unto the good and righteous as thou makest the Sun to shine and the rain to fall alike on all it being no Token either of thy Hatred or of thy Love Let me therefore O Lord have power through grace to use them as if I used them not and to live in this World as if I were not of this World making no provision for the flesh to satisfie the lusts thereof but that I may overcome the World by despising of it And give me not the things of the World O Lord I beseech thee till thou hast given me a heart to use them according to thine own heart even as liketh thee best and grant O Lord that I may be always as willing to leave them as to receive them and to give them back unto thee when thou pleasest and in thine own way as thine O Lord and not as mine blessing thee for the leaving them with me any time but most especially for the well using of them during that time considering that their well using will turn to my Eternal profit and their abusing of them to my Eternal loss Ah Lord let the eyes of my understanding be enlightned and always open to see the many perils and dangers in possessing them as well as their nothingness whilst I shall possess them and that worldly bliss consists more in possessing of little void of fears than of much subject unto danger and that it 's much the sweeter condition to want the Worlds sweetness than to have them if in their want we find no want and to esteem always that best which God giveth because he having promised will make it work for the best Come on me then what will come I doubt not Lord but I shall find it as I have hitherto found it to be for my good and coming from a God of Love to me in love and therefore O Lord I will love both thee and it and esteem every change the best change yea and a changing for the best and if at any time my condition should not please the flesh sure I am it will always please the Spirit if it please not at any time the outward it will always please the inward man if it please not the old man without it will please the new man within for Lord thou knowest if my condition should at any time displease me and I could change it yet I would not if by so doing I should displease thee for thou knowest I desire to please thee not my self the Spirit not the flesh the inward not the outward Man the New not the Old Man for I would not have what I would but O Lord that only that thou wilt be it what ever it will deny me not O Lord I most humbly most earnestly and most unfeignedly beg and beseech thâ—e in Jesus Christ for thine own dear and holy names sake deny me not this one thing whatever it cost me but let my life and my death my place of abode and condition be such as may O Lord bring thee most glory as may glorifie thee most O God of all Power and Glory And that seeing I served thee not O God my Creator in the days of my youth grant I beseech thee that I may serve thee freely cheerfully willingly and joyfully all the rest of my days unto the very last hour of my life that I may henceforth live the life of the righteous and that my last end may be like his Ah Lord let all the rest of my life to come be so spent as it may witness a continual sorrow for my life past that having lived here in thy fear I may dye O Lord my God in thy favour that having lived here the life of Grace I may ever hereafter live with thee O my sweet Jesus the life of Glory in thy Kingdom of Glory with the Father and the Holy Spirit O Lord that tryest the heart and searchest the Reins thou knowest all my thoughts as well as ponderest all my actions and therefore thou knowest how much my heart rejoyceth because that thou thus knowest it and because thou hast made it such as it is not that it is O Lord as it would or should be but because it willingly would be what it should be and that it would do and be as wilingly any thing that it wills as it wills it So it be O Lord God according to thy most holy righteous good blessed will And now O Lord God Almighty Maker Giver and Preserver of all things I most humbly beseech thee to hear me in Jesus Christ for all Kingdoms Nations and People in general and in particular over the face of the whole earth gather O Lord in much mercy gather thine Elect together from all the â—nds and corners of the World Jew and Gentile Turk and Infidel bond and free male and female young and old rich and poor Ah Lord be thou pleased in the greatness of thy compassions to pour out thy Holy Spirit upon all flesh and to write thy holy Laws of Grace in their hearts and thy Statutes of fear in their minds by the finger of thine Holy Spirit that every one may know who is the Lord and the power of his might that
Lord to know that thou art a God pardoning all Iniquities Transgressions and sins yea all Blasphemies wherewith they have blasphemed Ah Lord shew them the light of thy gracious and glorious Countenance and lead them in the way everlasting that they may never more swerve nor go astray from thy Divine and Holy Commandments Bless O Lord all that are travelling by Sea or by Land and bring them to their Ports and Places in safety defend them from all Pirats and Robbers that seek to do them hurt or wrong and from all other perils and dangers pitch thy tents O Lord round about them and keep them even as thou keepest thine own And lastly O Lord I most humbly and heartily beg and beseech thee in Jesus Christ to pardon and forgive all mine Enemies all the world over love them O Lord that hate me bless them that curse me do good to them that seek to do me evil forget and forgive all that they have done or would have done against me and change their hearts from evil unto good that they may no longer walk after the deceitfulness of their own evil Hearts but may do all things for the time to come in truth and sincerity according to thine own heart O Lord God that thou mayest own them for thy own and give them hearts O Lord to forgive me whom I have wronged whether it have been in thought word or deed either unto high or low rich or poor young or old and grant O Lord that I may fear and do so no more but as thou hast been unto me a sin-pardoning God so I beseech thee be unto me a sin-preventing God that I may not as the Dog return to his Vomit nor as the Sow to her wallowing in the mire again but that I may always henceforth set thee O Lord before mine eyes and be attent unto the motions of thy holy spirit and never to forget thy exceeding bountifull and mercifull dealings towards me and that love in Jesus Christ wherewith thou hast loved me and that I may remember that it is impossible for those who were once enlightned and have tasted of the Heavenly gift and were made partakers of the Holy Ghost and have tasted the good word of God and the Powers of the World to come if they shall fall away to renew them again unto Repentance seeing they Crucifie to themselves the Son of God afresh and put him to open shame for if we sin wilfully after that we have received the knowledge of the truth there remaineth no more sacrifice for sin but a certain fearfull looking for of Judgment and fiery indignation which shall devour the adversaries for having Lord by thy grace and mercy escaped the pollutions of the world through the knowledge of the Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ grant that I may not again be intangled therein and overcome and so my latter end prove worse if worse it can be than was my beginning Ah Lord God should such be my case which God forbid it would be much better for me that I had never known the way of Righteousness than after the knowledge of it to turn from thy holy Commandments delivered unto me Ah Lord God my Lord and my God in Jesus Christ thou knowest my weakness frailty and impotency that I cannot of my self as of my self think a good thought that I am prone to all evil and averse to all good to will indeed is many times present but how to perform I know not there is still O Lord God a law in my members warring against the law of my mind and leading me Captive into the law of sin Ah Lord when when O Lord when shall that time come and that blessed most blessed and glorious day dawn and appear in my heart that the root and branch of sin be totally rooted up and utterly destroyed and grace confirmed and grow up more and more until I come to be a perfect man in Christ Jesus that I may still more and more hate the evil which I do and love the good which I do not and cannot do that it may be no longer I that sin but sin that dwelleth in me and that by the assistance of thy grace and holy Spirit I may walk well pleasing before thee doing thy work and thy will here on earth as it is done in Heaven living the life of grace here and of glory hereafter the life of the Righteous that I may dye their death Ah Lord give thy self to me that I may give my self to thee live in me that I may live to thee owne me for thine own that I may owne thee for mine all give me Ah give me O Lord much grace that I may give thee much glory daily grace that I may give thee daily glory continually grace that I may give thee continually glory that I may be all thine O Lord only thine always thine and ever thine and all this I most humbly and unfeignedly beg of thee and whatever else thou knowest to be needfull or expedient for me both for my soul and body for the name and for the worthiness of Jesus Christ thy Son and my Saviour to whom with thy Glorious Majesty and Holy Spirit of Grace do I render and give with my whole heart as all due is and unto none else Honour Glory Power Might Majesty Dominion and Thanksgiving now henceforth and for evermore Amen Amen 34. If the love of Creatures be so lovely unto us and we esteem and love them most for their love and this their love doth many times sweetly satisfie and ravish our senses But how then are our hearts set on fire with Love when we have within us the fiery hot burning Love of a Loving God yea of a God of Love whose Love is so lovely as it knits our hearts in Love unto him and our greatest Love unto him is from his own Love because he hath so loved us as to give us hearts to love him even according to his own heart 35. If our Joy be according to the measure of Love which we enjoy from the Creature whom we most love Ah how great yea incomprehensibly great shall our joy be when we shall know and feel that we are beloved above measure by the Creator who maketh the Creature thus lovely and giveth him Love thus to love him 36. If our Love many times be so great unto the Creature for the Creature that we do not and it seems to us that we cannot love him so much as we would and do desire to do and we crave and desire chiefly his Love that we may yet love him more and this from and because we love him so much and for that our senses can be only satisfied with his Love and by loving of him for we love him most for his Love and his Love doth cause us to love him more whom we love so much yea whom we love most 37. But Ah how great then yea how wonderfully great is the
Christ and come Lord Jesus Ah come quickly and take me to thee to be ever with thee for though to me to live were Christ yet to dye would be great gain 55. Such and all such love falsly as love their Neighbours False love to our Neighbour or loving our Neighbour falsly for themselves only for the good they do them and for the benefit and advantage alone which they receive from them were it not for this good they would not care for them nor think of them nor pray for them nor wish or desire any blessing on them if they do at any time do them any good it is for the good that thereby they hope will accrue to themselves either of praise or profit otherwaies they would rather yea much rather their loss than their gain their dishonour than their honour and they would delight more much more to hear an evil than a good report of them and were it not that they want them or may want them that they stand them in stead they would rather yea much rather dis-serve them than serve them hurt them than do them good and though with their mouths they bless them yet in their hearts they curse them envying the very happiness that they pray for on their behalf they love them for their gifts not their gifts for them yea they love their gifts but not the givers of the gifts they love their gifts not because it comes from their love but because they are lovely that is because they stand them in stead they have need of them they should be in want if they did want them if they had them not they do not praise God on their behalf and pray for a double blessing on them for this their blessing of them if they wish or desire an increase of their substance and a blessing on their labours it is because they hope they will increase in doing them good in giving to them of their substance a blessing of their labours a part and portion of their profits and if they do not do so such will curse and not bless and would if they could take from them all that they have or seem to have for their love is self-self-love love only to themselves for themselves therefore false love loving falsly 56. I had much rather have no portion in the World than have the World for my portion 57. For I am sure the World never did nor never will make any rich and as sure that it hath and will make many Ah too too many poor 58. For many that have had and yet shall have great Portions of this Worlds good have nor shall have none of the good of Heaven for their Portion it 's hard for a rich man here to be rich there 59. And many that have no Portion in this World of this World have God and shall have God for their sure and everlasting Portion in the World to come 60. Ah happy yea thrice happy man that hath such a Portion there though he have none here what ever be his condition he is in a blessed condition for he shall be ever blessed blessed for ever and ever 61. But Ah miserable man who art only miserable that hath no Portion there what ever Portion he hath here yea though he abound in Corn and Wine and Oyl and all this Worlds good and glory 62. Give me Ah Lord give me any Portion in Heaven though but to be a door-keeper if I may but see thy face and hear thy Voice I care not though it be with the loss of all Portions here both of riches honours and pleasures 63. If thou givest me here O Lord but food and rayment how mean soever it be I will be content therewith and heartily thank thee and if thou givest me none I will thank thee for the time past and believe I shall want none for the time to come and that shall content me 64. Ah if the want of the World be so sweet when in its want we find no want how sweet then yea how much sweeter is Heavens fulness where is all fulness of all things and therefore no want at all of any thing 65. Ah how much better is it and how much greater gain to lose this Worlds all and gain Heaven then to gain this Worlds all and lose our part of Heaven which is Heavens all yea all Heaven 66. The Worlds loss with Heavens gain I shall not account any loss but all gain yea the greatest gain I can get but Heavens loss with all this Worlds gain I shall not account any gain but a great loss yea the greatest that I could or can sustain 67. He that loseth Heaven loseth all but he that gets only this Worlds all gets nothing even nothing at all 68. I will and always will account all losses gain to win Christ and all gain losses if I lose Christ 69. Let Christ then be my gain and I care not what losses I sustain 70. For this Worlds felicity is certain but a moment but the felicity or infelicity of the World to come is not uncertain any moment but certainly good or bad from the first to the last moment which last moment will be always alike as far off as it was the very first moment being ever ever 71. Give me then Ah Lord God that endless good felicity and happiness which is like thy self shall never change but endure for ever and not that which is like my self subject every moment to all change 72. Ah Lord thou knowest I would willingly most willingly change thus my life for death and then my death for life 73. That is my life of Sin for a death to sin to put all sin to death and then death for eternal life with Christ who is my life 74. Thou knowest O Lord also that I would willingly dye to live and live to dye 75. That is to dye to sin and live to grace live in all grace and dye to all sin that to me to live may be Christ but to dye gain yea that my life may be hid with Christ in God 76. I would willingly O Lord have thee mine all that I may give thee mine all and reserve from thee nothing at all 77. All Lord All I most willingly and unfeignedly give thee Ah that thou wouldest receive all and refuse nothing at all 78. For all Lord that 's mine is thine that is all that is good for the bad I renounce and give back also to him that gave it 79. All the World is nothing being all perishable therefore can be to nothing compared but to nothing 80. Ah what a pity is it that any man should be so sickle as to love such fickle things as are these below which to day are and to morrow are not 81. For is any thing lesser worser or lighter than vanity if any thing be or can be or if this Worlds things be any thing it is it which is so much vanity and so full
or think 27. The law of God is so written in his heart that with his whole heart he desires to keep his whole law 28. His joys are so great and his rejoycings so many that they make him even to suppose that he is in Heaven and to believe that Heaven is in him 29. He feels Gods loves to be so true and so truly nigh him as he values all love besides not worth the loving nor the thinking 30. His soul is so carried away aloft on this high Tide on this full Sea that he swims with ease pleasure delight joy and full contentment against all the streams and strong current of the worlds affections and the fleshes delights and desires 31. Though they were but a moment before so violent and strong that they carried him down even head long which scared and affrighted him so as if the time of deliverance had been far off he durst not Ah he durst not presume to imagine that such a calm was so nigh at hand sinful fleshly motions and affections did in a manner delight him that he even did as it were allow its raign and permit at least would almost have conniv'd and wink'd at the beginnings of evil though he well Ah though he well and clearly foresaw the Consequences to be very great and greatly dangerous 32. But on a sudden Ah on a sudden how did Ah how did all these tentations vanish away how slighted Ah how much slighted how trampled on Ah how much trampled on how cast aside Ah how cast aside how trampled and trodden under feet how soon Ah how soon was the memory thereof forgotten and how sweet Ah how sweet was its forgetfulness delightful its divorce and joyful its destruction 33. And how willing Ah how willing O Lord God thou only knowest that soul is that thus possesseth thee and is possest by thee to live Ah ever to live in this possession and to be for ever and thus ever possest by thee 34. The worlds chief joys are then but meer and foolish toyes he would not no nor cannot give a look on them they are so barren so unfruitful so empty so sottish so brutish to such an enlightned understanding that he cares not to understand nor consider what they are 35. Ah how how doth he wish it might be ever thus with him and that he might be thus ever senceless and dead to the worlds all and account all iâ—s all always nothing at all nay make no account of it no not so much as think of it 36. When that the soul is Ah when that the soul is thus wrapt up in Gods love when she is thus emptied as it were into him and filled with him how is she Ah how is she at rest and ease how calm how tranquil how quiet how rich how honourable and how refresht and delighted how hath she Ah how hath she all her desires and doth not nor cannot desire more Ah what peace what felicity and what praises and giving of thanks how doth she Ah how doth she forget the evil that is past and rejoyceth in the good that is present 37. How is the world and the things of the world cast out of doors and how Ah how are the doors of all his affections opened to let in his God to enjoy him and to make him his all and his only joy 38. Ah my God goe on goe on my God my God to Conquer Triumph and prevail over all the lusts and affections which are yet within me unsubdued uncast out unthrone them O Lord unthrone them and trample them all O Lord all both the great and the small under thy feet in the greatness of thy wrath and fury that they may be utterly destroyed and never more come near me to hurt me or destroy my poor soul who cleaves to thee who sticks fast to thee who desires to hold thee and never Ah never to let thee go Ah that I could that I could thus live with thee and in thee ever and depart from thee never O Lord never never see Psal 28. 39. Great is the goodness of the Lord to those that fear his name And to all those that keep his laws and delight in the same For they shall see him with great joy and shall his honour speak Their joy shall be to laud his name and he shall make them great 40. Oh give your selves to me saith he and I will be your guide And you shall in my Laws remain for I will you delight To walk in them you shall have hearts for all your joy shall be To live to praise my holy name the Lord of Hosts saith he 41. Go forth with joy both ev'ning and morn and let your praise redound Oh clap your hands and greatly joy for that you have him found For having him you have that all that mighty all always There is none else deserves like fame as his Eternal praise 42. O come into his Courts always and therein rest you still Be glad and mightily rejoyce when that you do his will To do thy will is all my joy and all that I desire Ah give me grace to do it still and nothing else require 43. Ah great God how great is thy love and how lovely Ah how lovely is thy greatness 44. What have I Ah Lord my God what have I when I have thee not and what have I not when O Lord God I have thee 45. How low Ah how low are all these high things here below to those high most high and glorious things of Heaven which the soul enjoys even here on earth in the flesh when that it hath Communion with God and enjoys him in the Spirit 46. Of what and how little account and esteem doth he account and esteem of all Companies of Friends Children Father Mother or the Wife of his bosome when he can or may enjoy the company of his God he will not nor cannot then consent to converse with flesh and blood when he may when he can by the spirit through the spirit speak to God and hear him answer him Ah how the soul at such time is satisfied delighted ravished filled and comforted how quiet how peaceable how willing chearful and glad to obey all his will 47. And how detestable hateful loathsome ugly filthy and abominable at such times especially are all lusts all affections worldly and fleshly are all sins of any rank though never so little though never so sweet near or dear he hates all both the great and the small 48. When that a soul enjoys that blessed blessedness of Communion with God it will not Ah it will not have Communion fellowship or converse with any other Creature or thing he will not mind any thing else nor suffer any thing else to come into his mind 49. He is then so stuft as it were and so full filled with God and the joys of his grace that he is divorced emptied and outed as it were of all other things yea all
that loving these less I may love thee more love thee so as thou requirest and deservest that is above all things in heaven above or on earth below 45. I know O Lord that thou art with me of a truth because thy truth is with me that is in me of a very truth 46. Love from God fills our hearts with sincere and true love for God or God's love to us fills us with love for him his love sweetly constraineth us 47. Ah how light how light is that heart that is emptied of all sin being unburdened of that intolerable burthen for if a wounded heart cannot be born ah then when such a heart is made whole it must needs bring ease refreshing comfort and unspeakable joy 48. When God is in the heart it may be seen in the face and perceived by the words that come out of the mouth such a lustre is on the whole Man both within and without when the presence of God by his Spirit is within he is surely beautifull in the eyes of all beholders that delight and desire to behold the face of God in Jesus Christ the very Majesty of God in some sort is on such a Soul and through the glorious light of Christ's gracious face his face doth shine in the sight of God and all good men 49. I will make no condition with thee O God but only this that is to love thee only in all conditions as my God and my only good 50. Ah Lord I most unfeignedly and humbly beseech thee let me never taste of this bitter bitter that is to find any sin sweet 51. But let all sin even all oh all Be unto me as wormwoed and gall 52. Ah Lord I humbly beseech thee never suffer the remembrance of the former pleasures of sin to please me but let their remembrance be altogether displeasing hatefull and detestable and to be delivered from them let it be unto me as the deliverance from Death and from Hell 53. Let the fire of thy grace quench totally the heat and fire of all and every lust sinfull and disordinate affection that I may henceforth burn only in the fire of Love to thy Laws 54. The true Life of God in a Christian is most of all and plainliest seen by his hatred to all evil and sin and by his unfeigned sincere ardent and continual Love to all that is good he loves all that is good in all to see it though afar off to hear it spoken of by any whatsoever but to find it in himself most of all joys and satisfies him to see any evil committed or to hear any evil spoken by any troubles and afflicts him such is his Antipathy against it that he will not give it the least healing or parley no nor cast the least glance of an eye to favour it it is abominable to him in thought word and deed and in all its circumstances even in all And as well hath the whole man all the faculties of the Soul hatred to the least circumstance of all ill as well as to the greatest but the degree and measure is according to the measure and degree or nature of the ill but it 's alike hated sincerely as well the very least as the very greatest of all And in the same manner and measure is his unfeigned Love to all that is good he thanks and praiseth and prizeth God for good thoughts as heartily and sincerely as for good words or actions because he as plainly seeth the true Love of God in the very least particular as in the very greatest And 't is the Love of God which is his presence in Love that makes his Soul to leap within him with joy When that the Soul sees his God it sees all his good his Heaven his Bliss his Peace his Love his Joy his Rest his whole and only Delight Contentment and Comfort But in the most good he sees him most and therefore desireth to do the most good that ever was done or is possible to be done and therein he is best pleased because that pleaseth his God best and to please him is his only pleasure all his pleasure joy and delight only it is his Heaven and therefore he makes it his only happiness 55. Ah God my God and my only good let it be I most humbly and unfeignedly beseech thee in Jesus Christ always thus with me that my soul may be satisfied may be solaced may be refresht and comforted by thy living in me and by my living always in thee and unto thee to thine eternal honour praise and glory for thine own glorious and holy names sake give me this grace that I may live this life here on Earth until I come to live that life that I shall after this is ended live with thee in Heaven So be it Lord So be it Amen Amen 56. Ah how happy thrice happy are we Who both tast know feel find savour see That thou livest in us and that we live in thee 57. Empty me O Lord of all even of all that I may be fit to receive and be filled with thy fulness even with thy blessed most blessed self the Ocean and Sea of all goodness 58. As long as we are full or in part filled with world flesh or self so much less room there is for God for when a Vessel is full it can receive nothing and according to the measure it 's empty it is capable to receive 59. How then Ah how then should we labour to empty our hearts of all that is not of God that we may be filled only with God with God only and always be thus empty that we may be thus always filled for it 's clear according to the measure we are empty we are capable to receive and we shall receive from God of his blessed fulness of unspeakable joys and pleasure if we are willing and labour earnestly and sincerely to empty our selves of our selves and of all fleshly worldly pleasures and joys which are but meer fancies vanities fooleries and toyes 60. Ah Lord God the Fountain and the Ocean that can never be emptied empty I most humbly and unfeignedly beseech thee in the name and for the merits of thy Son and my Saviour Jesus Christ my heart of all things even of all what ever it be that is not according to thy heart that is not of thee that I may pant and gape hunger and thirst long and desire to be filled with thee alone alone with thee with thee who art only desirable and to be desired only grant that all the Worlds all may be more and more unto me nothing even nothing at all that thou mayest be all mine and I all thine that I may love all things out of thee less and less dayly and thee O God more and more untill I so love thee as it may not be possible for me to love thee more that my Love may cause me so to sink into thee as I may see my self in
thou should'st do any good to me or for me so bad is my very best so empty nothing and vile is all mine all And knowing thee now O Lord God by thine own sweet name of love and mercy I am not I praise thee at all afraid that thou see in me all my sins past because thou hast given me a free pardon for them present sins because having pardoned those I am as sure that thou wilt pardon these neither am I afraid of my sins to come because I know that thou art never weary of doing good and that thou never slumbrest nor sleepest but always watchest over me Wherefore O Lord seeing that thou art become my Lord and my God I now most humbly beseech thee to look on me at all times in all places and things what ever my failings or my fallings be to recover me and comfort me as thou did'st Peter for I know and firmly through grace believe that what thou wert thou art and wilt be ever unto me a sin pardoning God a God pardoning all my sins whatsoever And seeing O God my God that thou art such a God as thou art give me grace that whatever I do I may do it to thy Glory for thy glory and never more Ah never more willingly wittingly or knowingly sin against thee in thought word or deed but freely and cheerfully depart henceforth from all iniquity with my whole heart and soul even from all both the great and the small that I may be ever thine and all thine from this time forth and for evermore Amen 111. Thus the Lord brings good out of evil sweet out of bitter and gives us as at this time unto my poor Soul new tokens pledges and assurances of his old love 112. Ah Lord let this thy Love and Kindness even thy most loving and kind Love be always had in remembrance of me and cause me to cling to thee to cleave to thee to hold thee fast and never to let thee go and let me always say the Lord be praised the Lord be praised always 113. Ah Lord seeing I have so deeply and so sweetly drank of and at this Well of Consolation let it be in me ever a Well of Living Water that may never grow dry that I may always suck at this breast to refresh my Soul when I am a thirst 114. I sincerely confess and profess were I to spend all my days to praise thee that the time would be too too short much by much to shew forth thy loving kindness and thy Love wherewith thou hast loved me And therefore my soul praiseth thee ' and rejoyceth for that there shall be no end of that time which thou hast O God appointed wherein I shall speak of and sing thy praises it shall be World without end that I shall praise thee O God the God of my Salvation and my God 115. O God let this mercy be always as fire to heat me as food to feed me as drink to refresh me as wine to comfort me as cloaths to cloth me as riches of all sorts to enrich me let it be to me always all things Let it not lose its worth nor tast by lying but let it be always as the Honey-comb dropping honey to revive and comfort and strengthen me and that I never forget what a God thou art and that thou changest not thou art still the same God blessed for ever and for ever 116. Ah Lord let me never forget these thy mercies but through grace and the presence of thy holy Spirit walk worthy of them unto all eternity through the worthiness merits and obedience of Jesus Christ thy only Son and my alone Saviour and Redeemers sake Amen 117. Many times God is so good and gracious so mercifull and loving unto us that then even then when we fear we shall see his frowns that he will frown on us when we come before him He to our great astonishment and admiration smiles on us When we fear that he will strike us with the Rod of his Anger he embraceth and kisseth us with the kisses of exceeding transcendent Love when we fear he will be absent he is then many times most sweetly present surpassing much by much all sweets conceivable as he was at this time to me which Ah that I could always bear in mind that I might henceforth and for ever live as I should live to his honour and for his glory only 118. Thus is our God good that he bringeth us good when we fear evil and sometimes sheweth us that his goodness is so great towards us for us that he mindeth not our evil 119. Surely when we mind it much and afflict our selves and are heartily ashamed and confounded by reason of our weaknesses failings and imperfections he sheweth that he will not punish us when we do as it were thus freely and severely punish our selves he knoweth of what we are made and that we are but dust and yet he delighteth that we love him fear him prise him praise him and believe him and make him and his Love all our delight and joy 120. Ah Lord suffer me never more to requite this thy exceeding great kindness with the least or any unkindness but that I may henceforth walk before thee circumspectly and wisely with a heedfull watchfull carefull care doing always thy will with my whole heart mind and will 121. When a Soul sees himself free from the Love liking or allowing of any sin it sees its self in God and how it is made partaker of the Divine Nature that it is a little spark or beam of that glorious Light which is pure transparent bright and clear and having no mixture nor no cloud for sin only brings darkness in the Soul sin only is the cloud which eclipses the Light of this glorious Sun sin only darkens and weakens our sight and our knowledge and hinders us that we do not nor cannot see our selves as we are in God but when that sin is done away totally that is all Love liking and allowance then are the eyes of our understanding opened and all darkness is swallowed up done away and wholly and totally consumed and we are swallowed up into this Divine Light by which we are made to see and know our selves as we are in God a part as it were of this Light even this Light it self in some measure it is so in us and we are so in it we see our selves clear and free from all fears and cares being delivered from them and having obtained the fulness of knowledge desired or desirable that is that we are partakers of him that is all purity all light all wisdom all serenity peace contentedness and rest all passions ceasing of desiring more for all the desires are satisfied having this knowledge to see our selves and know our selves to be with him and in him which to know to behold is to partake of and this is Eternal Life in us 122. But when the mind of man I mean
contents me 152. Thy presence O God thy presence thy presence is much more esteemed by me by much than life and sweeter ten thousand times ten thousand than the Honey-comb of any pleasure more desirable than the finest Gold or most precious Pearls and to be preferr'd above many Rivers of Wine and Oyl 153. Heap upon me O Lord I beseech thee heaps upon heaps of these thy favours and cause these thine overflowings to cover the banks of my barrenness and filthiness that I may be comely and pleasant in thy sight and esteem 154. Fill me O Lord I beseech thee so full as that I never grow empty again of thy grace and goodness of obedience and love 155. Warm me so that I never grow cold again but let this heat of the fire of thy love burn and consume all the cold Winter frost of the weeds and roots of sin and Corruption that my soul may be as a pleasant garden for thee O Lord my King and my God to take pleasure in 156. Thou hast O God thou hast thou hast in a very great measure Turn'd the Mountains of my sins into a Valley of pleasure 157. God is my God and therefore he will be my God always so whatever temptations fall on me I will not fear them for God who is my God is stronger than all and his love is above all either in Heaven above or on Earth or Hell below 158. He that truly loves all good must truly hate all evil for love to good produceth always in all hatred to evil for there is a contrary to every thing as light is contrary to darkness therefore loving the one good we must and can do no other than hate the other which is the contrary evil 159. Having our eyes opened our understandings enlightned we then see sin in its colours as it is in it self sinful and therefore we must hate it and we can then do no other but hate it with a perfect which is sincere hatred not only leave all sin but heartily unfeignedly sincerely and with our whole hearts hate all sin and loath all sin being changed and brought out of darkness which is from sin into the marvelous light of the knowledge of the love of God we cannot being cloathed with his nature loving what he loves Holiness and Righteousness but hate what he hates which is all sin and wickedness having put Christ Jesus on we must put the other off the world flesh and Devil and all their works sticking to Christ and holding him fast we must and will and can do no other still than let go our hold to all things out of him and besides him for according as our love is to the one so our hatred will be nay is to the other they being contraries and opposite one unto another 160. He that truly loves the ways of God which is Righteousness must doth and can do no other than hate the ways of the Devil which is sin we cannot serve two such Masters it is impossible to love two such Contraries 161. By our true sincere and unfeigned hatred to the one we may see and be sure of our unfeigned sincere and true love to the other and if we thus love truly all good we love God truly which ought and should assure us that we are beloved of God yea that we are his beloved through Jesus Christ the truly beloved whom he doth and ever will love truly and us in him for his love is not yea and nay unto us but yea and in Christ yea and Amen 162. He that hath thee O God hath all and therefore he that wants thee wants all though he wants nothing else at all 163. He that possesseth thee O God possesseth surely the best possession that is or can be possest 164. He that knows thee O God hath perfect knowledge for none doth or can know thee but from and by thy holy spirit of true wisdom and knowledge all knowledge and wisdom else to this is meer foolishness 165. When we are in thee O God we are truly free free from all evil and filled with all good for all good is in thee and comes freely from thee as the Rivers from the Sea 166. Wash me make me clean O God in and by Christ that I may be pure in thy fight even as gold well refined without any dross or mixture perfectly pure pure in perfection 167. By giving we receive that is when our hearts are drawn forth sincerely to give what God hath given us I mean of spirituals God gives us what we would have yea and much above what we did ask or could think 168. When thus we beg for others to have that we may have to give Ah how good gracious and bountiful is the Lord unto us in giving of us according to our hearts desires even the very desires of our hearts 169. When thus we desire grace to impart it unto others how agreeable unto God are our desires how Ah how doth he regard us and reward us 170. When thus we are beggers for others God maketh us rich with the treasures of Heaven with that true riches which will make us rich for ever which is grace here and glory hereafter 171. When thus we mind others good and welfare as our own making their case ours sympathising with them both in their good and evil in their present and future happiness then we shew forth that we live in God and that God liveth in us for where true love is God is for love is God and God is love 172. When we feel want in our Brethrens wants and are filled with what they are filled bearing their burthens of grief and sorrow with them it shews that we are of one heart and of one mind that we are Brethren if we have thus compassion one of another 173. And when we make their joys our joys it shews plainly that there is one spirit in us even the spirit of the love of God which is Christ Jesus our Lord who leadeth us in his paths and teacheth us to practise what he hath commanded us and his Children we are whom we obey whether of sin unto death or of Righteousness unto life By their works ye shall know as God who are his 174. When thus we are unto others what we are unto our selves it sheweth plainly that we are members of Christs mystical body and that he is our head 175. When thus we agree and sympathise in one anothers honour and dishonour sorrows and joys we shew forth that we are not two but one and this oneness sheweth also that we are one in Christ that he liveth in us and that we live in him that he is ours and that we are his 176. And when Christ thus owneth us for his own we may be sure that when he cometh at his second and sudden coming in glory we shall also appear with him and be made like him glorious as he is glorious though not so glorious 177. He
that thinks any thing more worth than Christ is not worthy of Christ 178. He that would not willingly lose all things for him and for his sake shall never have him nor of him partake 179. He that holds any thing dearer than Christ's love shall never partake of his love 180. But he that loveth him above all things beyond all things and more than all things may surely say that he hath all things for as Christ is above all God blessed for ever and for ever so he is all in all unto all those that truly love him 181. So sure as we would that he did love us so sure it is that he doth love us and more sure much by much and so much as we would that he did love us so much he doth love us and yet much more by much and so strongly and continually as we would that he did love us so doth he and so will he even unto the end for there is nor never shall be any end of his love he will love whom he doth love world without end for ever and for ever 182. So sure as we are Gods creatures so sure is he our God and so sure as he is the Father of all mercies so sure is he our Father and therefore sure it is that we are his dear children and therefore surely he will be ever unto us a most loving and merciful Father delighting to do us good and to make us his very delight in Jesus Christ our eldest Brother blessed Saviour and Redeemer 183. O Lord I have no good in me but what comes from thee I say none at all either great or small 184. From thee O Lord alone I have all that I have therefore me and all mine I confess and acknowledge is all thine 185. How weary Ah how weary am I of my self and yet not so weary as I would be because I keep not thy Laws 186. How loathsome Ah how loathsome am I to my self and yet not so much by much as I would be because I love thee not O God my God as I would and as I should love thee 187. That God is what he is is the greatest and chiefest joy of all those that love him fear him know him and have given up themselves unto him 188. The presence of God which is Communion with him through his Holy Spirit is the feast of fat and pleasant things yea the Feast of Feasts unto that Soul and every Soul that hath truly tasted of him 189. In his presence is all joy unspeakable joy and from his right hand flow continual pleasures for evermore 190. The good and the only good that a soul in God desireth chooseth longeth for and panteth continually after being ever hungry and a thirst to enjoy is in some measure to be like him in all things always to be conformable unto him to put him on and that he may never put him off 191. The goodness of God is such a souls only goodness the glory of God is such a souls only glory the honour of God is such a souls only honour the wisdom of God is such a souls only wisdom the riches of God is such a souls only riches and the love of God is such a souls only love God being only his his only good his only all in all always All that is Gods is dear and near unto him yea is his dearest and his nearest of all things either in Heaven above or on Earth below his cause such a soul makes his and his truth and ways he is so wedded unto as he only joyeth in the remembrance of them and for that he is by his Holy Spirit thus strictly wedded unto them having chosen them for his Love his delight his refreshings and rejoycings having his heart in some measure according to Gods heart and his mind according to the mind of God 192. All that is in all creatures both in Heaven above and here on Earth below is from God all their strength is from his strength all their Power from his Power all their might from his mighâ— all their wisdom from his wisdom all their love from his love and all their loveliness from his loveliness all their goodness from his goodness and all their greatness from his greatness all their riches from his riches and all their peace from him who is the God of Peace all their rest from him who is their rest all their joy from him who is the God of Joy all happiness felicity and bliss from him who is all happiness in himself and is his own felicity and bliss Thus from Gods all all Creatures Saints and Angels have their all and therefore they return unto him always as all due is all Honour Glory Power Might Majesty Dominion and Thansgiving for ever and for ever 193. Ah God how great is thy greatness how good Ah how good is thy great goodness how deliciously sweet is thy sweetness how lovely Ah how transcendently lovely is thy loveliness how beautiful Ah how beautiful is thy beautifulness Who Ah who is a God like unto thee our God abundant in loving kindness always doing good 194. Ah most gracious and most glorious Lord God full of all grace and all glory thou art all fulness of all blessedness all the blessed are all blessed in thee even from thy ever blessed blessedness 195. The Lord would not give me the World at full till he had first fully given me Heaven to the end that I might not love what I should not but what I should that I might not love most the less but the most that is having the true knowledge of the worth of Heaven I might chuse it prize it love it and make it my whole choice delight and love for if the Lord had first given me my fill of the World I should doubtless have satisfied my self therewith and rested on it and sought only after it and not have minded Heaven nor the things in Heaven I should have made these low things here below the highest things in my esteem and choice and sought no other Heaven than thus to have lived on earth possessing earthly things 196. But now blessed be God for his goodness though I have earthly things in abundance I esteem account and prize them but as the things of earth even as dirt dung and dross compared with the things of Heaven yea with those things of Heaven that God giveth here on earth to those that love him for he that hath seen that hath tasted and that knows the one and the other must needs acknowledge confess and say Ah how low are all these things here below when compared with the things above they are all even nothing at all empty poor despicable poor low things 197. The Lord would not suffer me to possess the things of the flesh first ere he had feasted resatiated and satisfied me with the things of the Spirit with Heavenly and Spiritual things that I might be able to make a fit
knowledge to know thee the true God and Jesus Christ whom thou hast sent which thou hast I praise thee in some measure caused me to know to my Everlasting comfort thus even thus I am sure O God is thy good will and pleasure that I Communicate and forget not what thou hast in so much love Communicated unto me impart unto them all that thou hast imparted unto me And I praise thy goodness O God for that thou hast given me a heart in some measure heartily to desire it and longingly and lovingly to embrace with much comfort joy and content all occasions whatsoever to do it unto all without any respect of Persons to the poorest and meanest Creature according to the flesh as well as unto the highest in degree and honour among men and that their Conditions blessed be thy Name makes no condition with me for I account my self in very truth Servant and Debtor unto all both bond and free young and old and would with all my heart and soul do for any of them what thou requirest and commandest yea methiâ—ks I would give them what I have and be without it that they might have it I would be hungry and thirsty and poor and naked to feed refresh cloath and make rich their souls I would most sincerely and willingly that they had all of them a double Portion of the gifts and graces of thy holy Spirit which thou hast given me to the end it might be well with them and they might doubly praise thee Ah Lord Stamp on their hearts the seal of thy Divine love hide them under thy most sacred and glorious pavilion that they may be kept safe from the evil day and from the evil one who continually seeketh to devour them swallow them up O Lord into thy self that they may be ever secure dart O God a beam of thy Divine love that by its reflection they may have love to love thee again as thou lovest them not as to measure or degree that I know well is in none either on earth or in Heaven nor cannot be the most blessed Saints Angels Archangels Cherubins and Seraphims were the love of all those lovely blessed and glorious Creatures emptied into one alone then even I know his would come short of thine of thy love O God to that Creature whom thou lovest in the least degree to Salvation for thy love is the love of a God who is love that would be but the love of a Creature thine would be from thy self alone that would be from thee and given by thee so that the love which in sincere love I thus in Jesus Christ beg of thee for them is that they may have true love for thee and thine continually that it may continue with them and in them unto the end till that thou shalt so fill them with that first choice and chief grace that they all may be as thou art in a degree all love Ah Lord God confound I pray thee the wisdom of the wise I mean thou knowest the worldly wise bring down their pride and stain their glory such as will go about to condemn what they cannot mend and to marr what they cannot make turn O God their wisdom as thou did'st Achitophel's into foolishness but preserve them unto the end from such a like end and open the eyes of their understanding that they may see and acknowledge the errors of their ways and come speedily out of them and before ever converted unto thee that their souls may ever live with thee Ah Lord God what a most pitiful thing is it and of all things to be lamented with and in tears of blood that any poor soul should either live or dye in sin that a soul which is of much more value than ten thousand worlds should be for ever lost and undone for such a base vile filthy thing as is sin the very excrements of naughtiness and by which O God thou that art worthy of all honour art so much dishonoured and the Devil so much honoured Ah how is it to be pittied and dolefully lamented that so many poor souls should believe lyes and the Father of lyes the Devil before thy word and thy self who art the God of all truth and love how great Ah how great was thy love O God to save poor lost sinners in sparing and giving thy own only dear and beloved Son to the most shameful and most painful death of the Cross to redeem them from sin death Hell and the Devil and hast thou not promised with him to give them all things And Ah how great was thy love O most sweet Jesus who did'st so willingly submit to thy Fathers will and for the glory which was set before thee for us sinners did'st cheerfully endure the Cross and despise the shame and so sits down at the right hand of thy Father to prepare there a place for us and by thy continual intercession to prepare us for that place and this thy sitting down in glory at his right hand shews plain that thou hast done all that is to be done that can be required all as thou said'st when thou gavest up the Ghost is surely finished our Redemption fully wrought and compleated thy Fathers wrath appeased and he well pleased Ah Christ with and in all humility of heart I speak it thou had'st this spirit in thee thou did'st even as it were thus complain ye will not come to me that ye may have life and did'st weep for and over Jerusalem because her day of salvation was past and thy holy spirit in the mouth of thy Prophet complaineth and as it were lamenteth their sad condition saying Ah why will you dye O House of Israel And further how often doth this thy gracious and blessed spirit O God leave as it were thy bosome and comes and sues and wooes us that he may sanctifie and make us chosen and fit Vessels for thy use Ah Lord thou knowest how often such like considerations have sadened my soul that thou who art the God of truth should'st be thought by so many as it were a lyer for thy Word is not believed by them but made as a thing of nought trampled under foot and cast behind the back and Drunkards Whoremongers and such vile persons words be received entertain'd taken up welcom'd and preferr'd before thee O God before thee and thy Word and all thy most gracious offers of grace Now if such by thy good and gracious Providene come to read these words or of that which thou hast made me to write I humbly pray thee in Jesus Christ thy Son to pity him and pardon him Ah fetch home O God all wandering Prodigals that are in far Countries that is far from thee seeding on Hogs and Harlots which is on their own fleshly Carnal Lusts and vile affections Ah Father I know thee to be full of love and compassion Ah be thou pleased to do for all such as thou hast done for me for such was
my most miserable and woful condition But I praise thy glorious Name thou hast washt and cleansed and sanctified my soul Ah be thou pleased to let them all tast of the same love and kindness let them drink all of the same Cup and eat of the same meat and be cloathed with the same Robes and have a like ring of Love put on their fingers Ah let them O Father Lord of Heaven and Earth be thus welcomed by thee and owned by thee for thine own and adorn'd thus graciously with thine own glory that thou mayest delight in them and they may make thee only all their joy delight and rejoycing Ah that the Devil had fewer Servants and thou O God who art all goodness had'st more that he were cast off by all and thy grace and favour accepted of that he were disowned and thou O God for ever owned to be only worthy to be believed in feared loved prized magnified and praised let these and a thousand-fold more of thanksgiving honour and glory be given unto thy most sacred and most glorious Name who art God of gods and Lord of lords the very and only true God blessed for ever and for ever Thus even thus O Lord I have taken on me through the guidance of thy good spirit to chatter a little as a Crane or a Swallow and to speak unto thee and of thee with a stammering tongue thou knowest how far short and scant it is to what I might would and me thinks could speak if thou would'st be pleased to inable me to declare and shew forth what thou hast in love and mercy stablisht and rooted within me But in my weakness and seantness I trust O Lord thou wilt be large and by and with my little speak much to their hearts souls and Consciences unto whom I can speak but to the hearing of the â—ar and though I had the tongue of an Angel yet my words could not be effectual Paul could speak but to Lydia's ear it was the sweet charming voice of thy holy spirit that spake to her heart and begat in her holy and Heavenly affections Paul's planting and Apollo's watering without thy blessing would be in vain all mans all is nothing at all but emptiness it is only thou O God that madest the soul that only canst satisfie the soul and thou who only art above Conscience that canst quiet the Conscience That thou wilt thus graciously and powerfully work on others hearts and lives with this thy gracious work of grace with which thou hast so richly and plenteously wrought on mine and in me are my hopes desires and hearty humble and affectionate prayers and for this end and to bring glory to thy Eternal most holy and most glorious name I send it forth under the shadow of thy wings to be protected Ah Lord hear me and graciously answer me and do for me and all thine much more abundantly than I or they can ask or think according to the greatness of thy goodness and the goodness of thy greatness and all I humbly beg ask and crave in the name and for the sake and worthiness of Jesus Christ the Righteous thy dear Son and my dear Saviour and Redeemer for whom my soul doth and shall ever praise thee and to him with thine own sacred holy divine and glorious Majesty and blessed spirit be now and always given by me and all thine as all due is and to none else honour glory power might dominion and thanksgiving for ever and for ever Amen Amen So be it Lord so be it Amen and Amen IF then all this thou wilt receive Thou must thy self of all bereave Thou must thy self for ever loose If Christ thou wilt for ever choose And if this choice thou here dost make Christ will thy soul never forsake For if thou dost to all sin dye Thou shalt with him live Eternally Where all his glory thou shalt see And live in him and he in thee Ye shall no more be two but one As is the Father and the Son Eke with the Holy Ghost all three Shall give themselves to live in thee Ah blessed gift and blessed life Where all is peace no war no strife Where time shall never wear away Where is no night but all is day Which day shall never have an end And all our work shall only tend To give God praise for all his love Who sits above all powers above Those three in one and one in three That blessed were are and shall be Beginning they had never none And therefore end shall not be known All time that 's past is with them present And that to come is never absent Therefore in them thou all shalt see That passed is and what 's to be Which shall thee fill with such great joys That thou shalt still lift up thy voyce And with the Angels and blessed sing Praise to our God Praise to our King Let all praise honour and glory be given to God the God of all glory from whom I have received all that I have both to will and to do FINIS Advertisement THE Author hath ready for the Press several other Meditations on divers different Subjects As On Moses and St. Paul ' s desires to have their Names blotted out of the Book of Life for their Brethren's sakes On Self-denial what it is and what it is not The difference of a Christians Love for God at his first Conversion and afterwards On Christ's coming to judge the World at the last day with all the blessed of Heaven And many others which he hopes through the Blessing of the Almighty will be to Edification
Heavenly Eternal and Incomprehensible Glorious Lord God the God and Father of all mercies and of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ I thy poor and unworthy creature despicably poor blind and naked and out of Christ I confess and acknowledge that I have nothing wherewith to cover my nakedness and deformity but unclean filthy raggs my own righteousness being unrighteousness my own obedience being disobedience my own worthiness being unworthiness so that all my all is even nothing at all and can be fitly compared to nothing but to nothing I see now and know my self to be a most miserable wretch the chiefest and the greatest of all sinners yea the very worst of the worst of all the sons of Adam dry bones rottenness filthiness barrenness uncleanness naughtiness emptiness unsavoury salt a well without water a broken cistern that can hold no water impurity unholiness all evil and altogether all evil always without and within in Spirit Soul and Body all my thoughts words and actions and that continually I sincerely confess and proclaim unto thee O God and before Angels and Men that there is nothing in me as I am in my self which doth or can deserve the least of all thy mercies not the least look of Love not the least smile nor glance of one of thine eyes O Lord in favour nor to be admitted to look up to Heaven or call thee O God Father nor to expect the least admittance into thy glorious presence Thou mayest O God thou mayest most justly reprove and reproach me openly and take all my Prayers Petitions and what else soever and as dung throw them in my face to my everlasting shame and confusion and to thine own honour glory and praise thy judgment would be just right and good and all both good and bad must and would applaud thee for it and my own soul and Conscience would say Amen thereunto for there is not any of thy Divine Commandments and most holy laws but I have broken again and again wittingly willingly knowingly and presumptuously I have often cast thy precepts behind my back and trampled them under my feet I have often O God I confess I have often turned thy grace into wantonness quencht the sweet and blessed motions of thy holy Spirit hated to be reformed chose the ways of Hell death and destruction for Body and Soul and run knowingly and wilfully out of the ways of Heaven bliss and everlasting rest and happiness I would not that thou shouldest reign over me who art the Lord of Life and Glory I have prophan'd thy house thy Sanctuary thine Ordinances thy Word and Sacraments Thus even thus and a thousand times worse have I rebelliously and traiterously acted against thy Soveraignty and Power though I knew that thou wert Lord over all and above all even God blessed for ever and for ever by whom I did live move and had my being Ah Lord I know well that thou knowest all that I have ever done against thee or would have done I know well that nothing is or can be hid from thee thou seest into the dark corners and crannies of our hearts thoughts and affections thou knowest what I am and what I would be and how I should have â—hus continued unto my lives end hadst â—hou not in love and mercy pull'd me out of the everlasting burning as a brand out of the fire if thou hadst not O God come in â—o my help and succour the Devil had devoured me the Devil had destroyed me for ever and for ever for I was his captive his vassal his slave I did his will I obeyed his commands I did even run when he â—id me go But ever praised be thy transcendent glorious name O God of all goodness and Father of Love mercy and compassion that wert pleased to make my calamity and extremity thine opportunity that then even then when thou sawest that all help out of thy self was in vain thou shouldest be pleased to come and succour me and set me free to break the fetters and chains by which I was led as a most miserable Caitif and Captive almost into Hell it self thou hast O God thou hast broken the snares and I am escaped thou hast delivered my Soul from death and my Songs shall be to praise thee whilst I live I will praise thee O Lord my deliverer and never keep silence rather would I that my tongue should cleave to the roof of my mouth than not declare the mercies and the loving kindness of thee my God to my poor Soul and I trust as well as pray and beseech thee O my God and Father in Jesus Christ that thou wilt daily put new Songs of praise into my mouth and that thou wilt in some measure enable me to speak fitly worthily and opportunely of thy gratious dealings towards me that those that hear and know thee may with me labour to be more affected and delighted with thee and prize thee yet at a far higher prize and that others that hear and know thee not may so hear as that they may resolve to seek thee with us and may see thee to be the fairest of ten thousand yea the only fair lovely beautiful and desirable But O incomprehensible unconceivable unexpressible goodness love and bounty the Ocean and Fountain of all bliss blessedness and happiness how can I how shall I worm I nothing I speak of thee and of thy gratious dealings unto my poor Soul O the heighth depth length and breadth of thy Love it is as the Heavens for heighth as Hell for depth as Eternity for length and as from Everlasting to Everlasting for breadth nay all this is far short of it it is much more than all this by much for it is thy self O God thy only self thy very self that thou hast given me thy Kingdom and thy Glory and not only in Heaven hereafter but even now now hast thou done this for my poor unworthy Soul having often fed feasted and solaced my Soul with those ravishing joys that thou hast laid up and prepared for those that unfeignedly love thee thou hast in thy goodness bounty and love often caused me to tast of that hidden Manna that bread of Life and to drink of those Rivers of pleasures that flow from thine own right hand thou hast many times as it were carried my Soul into that mountain of happiness where I have seen thy glorious back parts thy gratious transcendent goodness and have beheld in the Spirit the Celestial Canaan the new Jerusalem the City of God even God in Man communicating himself unto him for Christ the hope of glory is in us dwells in us and makes his abode there which is thy Tabernacle O God thou hast not only given him for us on the Cross but thou continually continuest to give him unto us to crucifie our sins and sinfull lusts and affections in us to put them to death that he himself may live and reign and rule in us that we may
be thine and thou ours Ah Lord God I praise thee thou hast often given me the seal of thy Love thy Holy Spirit witnessing assuring establishing and perswading my Soul heart and conscience of the free full and gracious pardon of all my sins past present and to come Thou hast often O God I praise thee thus covered me thus spread the banners of thy Love over me thus made me sit under the shadow of thy branches thus feasted my Soul in thy banquetting house of Love rest peace and joy thus shewn me thy beauty and thy glory thus allured me and tyed me fast unto thy self with the cords of thy divine Love thus shewn me thy great Salvation thus given me wisdom and knowledge to know thee my God and Father and Jesus Christ whom thou hast sent thus caused me to believe and hereby made my joys full to admiration adoration and astonishment On this glorious Mountain of Grace have often I desired to abide that I might continue to abide with thee to enjoy thee who only art full and perfect joy but I know that these changes shall and must come as Winter and Summer whilst we are here in the flesh but the time will come that thou wilt change us but once more and then we shall live with thee in thee and to thee for ever and for ever Ah Love who can speak of it fitly or as he should it is thy Divine Nature O God it is thy self and therefore men nor Angels cannot declare it this three-fold Cord thy Love O most blessed and glorious Trinity cannot be broken and against it the gates of Hell shall never prevail Ah greatness that 〈◊〉 good although thou hast in Heaven Millions of Millions of most glorious Creatures to look on and converse with yet notwithstanding such is thy profound humility and condescendence love and goodness that thou wilt and dost behold yea and delight too to behold and communicate unto us poor worms sinful dust and ashes the richest choicest greatest and most peculiar treasures of thy grace and glory even of the very same though in a far less degree and measure as thou dost unto them that are with thee in Heaven thou givest us knowledge to know thee love to love thee joy to rejoyce in thee and rest to roul and rest our selves on thee they indeed eat and are filled drink deep and are resatiated see thy face and are altogether satisfied But we indeed here do eat but the fragments or crums of their so Royal Feast and Banquet we do but sip of the cup of which they drink so deep and this to us is but at times but they are always thus replenished and filled with the good things of thy House we indeed see thee O God but very darkly at the best sight of thee to their sight we know but in part at the highest pitch of our attainments here in the flesh and joy and rejoyce but at times the World Ah this wretched World and the things of the flesh as cloggs yea as Mountains of Earth pull us down to the Earth when our Souls are as on Eagles wings soaning up to Heaven and pull us back when we are as it were peeping into Heaven yea when O God thou dost as it were pull back the vail that we might see even into the Holy of Holies thus thou feedest and feastest us at times with the very bread the blessed with thee feed on and causest us to drink the Wine of the same Vintage and we in thy Son Jesus Christ see our selves clean undefiled without spot or wrinkle pardoned justified sanctified yea as if we were already glorified with thine own glory true they have their portion in hand in possession ours is by promise yet to receive but we have thy Word O God who art just true and unchangeable and therefore we can and do rejoyce as well as they and with the same joy And thus O Christ my Saviour and Redeemer I know thou wilt present me unto thy Father even in thine own righteousness worthiness and obedience they shall all be imputed unto me as if they were mine own and in these thy glorious robes I am sure and certainly perswaded I shall find acceptance before God thy Father who will not be ashamed to own me for his own nor to be called my God and my Father I know and confess Ah my dear Redeemer that all my bliss and happiness present and future consist in being united unto thee and as having an interest and sure title to thy worthiness and obedience for in thee and in thee alone we are heirs of all mercies and blessings out of thee we are heirs of all miseries in thee we are children of the Father but out of thee children of the Devil in thee we shall be accepted and accounted worthy but out of thee rejected and esteemed unworthy in thee we shall pass for obedient even as if we had never transgrest nor sinned but out of thee we can be lookt on but as disobedient and transgressors of all thy most holy Laws and Divine Commandments in thee O Christ I say in thee we 〈◊〉 fit for Heaven but out of thee only fit for Hell in thee O Christ in thee we are the Fathers delight but out of thee his hatred in thee O Christ in thee we have much boldness and free access to the Throne of Grace but out of thee only shame and confusion of face in thee O Son of Righteousness we are more resplendent glorious and beautiful than the Sun but out of thee Ah out of thee we are blackness ugliness and deformity in thee O thou the only all we have all things but out of thee we want all things Ah that thou wouldest give me more and more of thy self that I might give thee more of my self Ah that thou wouldest so live in me that I might only live to thee and for thee who art the liâ—â— of my liâ—e yea much better than ten thousand lives Thus even thus thy blood O Christ speaketh good things to us and for our souls for whom thou hast dyed it opens Heaven gates unto us when it shuts them against others it appeaseth the Fathers wrath towards us when it causeth it to burn against others it procureth us all good when it preventeth all against others it maketh our peace so that we shall ever live in rest and peace with thy Father the God of Peace with thy self the Prince of Peace and with thy Holy Spirit the Spirit of Peace when to others it shall make War for ever and for ever Ah my dear Saviour send down I most humbly beseech thee thy Holy Spirit into my heart to sanctifie purifie and purge me from all dead works from the lust of the eye the lust of the flesh and the pride of life that I may live as thou didst live here in the flesh doing all the good was possible to be done from the highest of Grace to the very lowest