it if thou art not heartily resolv'd to part with it why dost thou complain what makes thee cry out O wretched creature that I am who shall deliver me from the body of this death what makes thee wish that what thou hast done against God were undone what makes thee afraid of offending God why dost thou weep why dost thou watch against thy corruptions what makes thee angry with thy self for displeasing God what makes thee breathe and pant after Christ as the wounded Hart pants after the Water-brooks what makes Christ so sweet and sin so bitter to thee what makes thee asham'd of looking up to Heaven whence is it that all the preferment and riches of this World cannot tempt thee to sin wilfully whence is it that thou delightest not in the company of sinners but thy delight is chiefly in them that fear the Lord If these be not signes of Grace what character of mercy wouldst thou have hath not thy God said that he 'l love those that do love him if thou lov'st him not why art thou restless till thou enjoyest him if thou lovest him not why dost thou desire him why art thou willing to follow him through misery and the greatest troubles to be forever with him thou hast infirmities to wrestle withal but hath not thy God promis'd thee that he 'll bruise Satan under thy feet shortly thou canst not totally master such a corruption but dost not thou fight against it thou meetest with temptations but dost not thou grapple with them Satan follows thee but dost not thou resist him thy Conscience terrifies thee but hast not thou the Cross of Christ to fly to if God had a mind to kill thee would he have shewn thee all these things if God were gone from thee would not his Spirit be gone too if thou hast not the Spirit of God what mean thy longings after God what means thy love to a Spiritual life why dost thou pray so earnestly for the fruit of the Spirit why art thou altogether for a clean Heart and for renewing of a right Spirit within thee are not these signs that Gods Spirit warms thy affections and makes intercession for thee with groanings which cannot be uttered God seems to go away that thou mayst cry more earnestly after him and clouds his comforts that thou mayst sue for them with greater importunity he lets thee sink a little that thou mayst cry with a louder voice Lord save me or else I perish and falls asleep in the Ship that thou mayst take the greater pains to wake him He sees thou grow'st weary of his favour he therefore darkens it that thou mayst be at some trouble to recover it and having recover'd it set a greater price upon 't he withdraws himself for awhile that at his return thy joy may be fuller and bids his gracious influences stop awhile that when they flow in upon thee again they may fill all thy faculties with greater gladness thou canst not perform thy Duties with that alacrity and chearfulness thou desir'st but hast not thou reason to bless God that thou dost in good earnest desire to doe better was Heaven purchas'd in a moment or Sin conquer'd in an hour is not the way to life a race where men must run on till they reach the mark Go on O my Soul go on the farther thou proceedest in Gods ways the sweeter thou wilt find them the more thou strivest the more thou'lt conquer and the oftner thou dost address thy self to God the more thy dullness and weariness will vanish and the more thou lookest upon the everlasting recompence the greater mind thou wilt have to go on from strength to strength O my Soul hope in God for I shall yet praise him who is the health of my countenance and my God IV. It disposes a man to be a worthy receiver of the Lords Supper Indeed I doe not see how without it a man can receive any benefit by that blessed Sacrament for it being an Ordinance designed chiefly to impregnate the Soul with very strong longings and breathings after a crucified Saviour with a deep sense of the incomprehensible 1ove of God in Christ Jesus and with earnest resolutions to love and to obey him before all the dictates of Flesh and Bloud and of our carnal Interest it is not to be conceiv'd which way the Soul should arrive to all this without considering the end nature and advantages of this Sacrament and its probable a man may then be affected with this sublime mystery when he rowzes his Soul some such way as this Dost thou rightly understand O my Soul what this great and tremendous Ordinance means Behold thou art going to feast with that God who stretches out the Heavens like a Curtain and layes the beams of this chambers in the waters and makes the clouds his chariot and rideth upon the wings of the wind What Feast with so Glorious a God and come without a Wedding-Garment What Sup with him who dwelleth in the Heavens and not purify thy self even as he is pure Can two walk together except they be agreed what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness and what communion hath light with darkness What concord hath Christ with Belial What agreement hath the Temple of God with Idols This is the great Ordinance O my Soul which must either promote thy everlasting happiness or aggravate thy everlasting condemnation how happy mayst thou be if this Sacrament charms thee into a fervent love to thy dear Redeemer but how wilt thou escape if thou neglect so great a Salvation Here are the greatest engagements the greatest motives to a life as becomes the Gospel of Christ here God adjures thee to use the words of the Church By Christs agony and bloody sweat by his cross and passion by his death and burial to bury thy unclean desires and inordinate affections and to dedicate thy self and all thou hast to his service Here is represented the greatest love that ever was vouchsafed to men here the Son of God appears all bloudy to fright thee from thy sins here Christ is as it were crucified before thine eyes that looking upon him whom thou hast pierc'd Thou mayest mourn as one that mourns for his onely Son Here Christ appears laden with all the blessings of Heaven here the ever-blessed Trinity seems to use its utmost endeavours to perswade thee into a Heavenly conversation here the desert of sin is discover'd in the wounds and torments of an infinite God and hither thou comest O my Soul to renew thy Baptismal vow hither thou comest to enter into a solemn Covenant with God and faithfully to promise him to resign thy self entirely to him to fall out with him no more to defile thy Garments no more to dishonour to betray him no more to be faithful to him to vindicate his Glory to esteem his friends as thy friends and his enemies as thy enemies and to live up to those laws which he hath sealed with his
and indignation against all those that obstinately prefer their foolish desires before all the Dictates and Oracles of thy Holy Spirit O have not I reason to fear that thou wilt say of me Cut down this barren Tree why doth it cumber the ground and yet how free how full are thy promises to the truly penitent how full of Sweetness and Love are all thy Gracious Engagements to those that will have no more to doe with Idols that will cleave to thee alone that will renounce themselves and follow thee O my Lord these thy promises are my refuge were it not for these desperation would be my portion I doe in some measure see my folly I see what a gracious tender patient long suffering God I have offended I see how my Soul hath leaned on broken reeds what a sandy foundation I have trusted to how the world hath beguiled me how I have shunn'd thy company been glad when God hath been farthest from my thoughts rejoyced when I have been least of all reflecting on thy goodness I have nothing to plead for my self I have no apology to make the greatest charity cannot excuse my misdemeanors I have had light and darkened it convictions and smother'd them knowledge and abused it reason and perverted it heard thy word and scorn'd it enjoy'd the means of Grace and continu'd blind and hard under them Thy Mercy is my Sanctuary I am weary of my burthen I loath my transgressions I am willing to be rid of them I desire to abhor them but though I am thus willing my flesh is weak my understanding dark my will dull my affections to goodness faint my resolutions in constant Come O my Lord come down into my Soul come quickly O thou great preserver of Men teach me to answer all the reasons of Flesh and Bloud against a serious conversion arm me with arguments to beat down my carnal interest furnish me with motives to a truly Heavenly life motives which may break through all the devils suggestions motives which may invalidate and weaken the prophane motions of my Lusts. Come down thou Sun of Righteousness thou mighty Star of Jacob dispel the Clouds and Mists which are upon my Reason cleer the eyes of my understanding and enable me to see the arts of Sin the wiles of the Devil the snares of the World the stratagems of the Flesh and all the mischief that 's plotted against my Soul by my Spiritual enemies Convince me throughly that to follow thee is my greatest interest that to resist these enemies is my greatest safety that to watch against their charms is my greatest felicity O let me apprehend sin as it is the greatest evil let it appear very terrible to my mind represent unto me Heaven and thy Love and all that thou hast done for me in such lively colours that neither death nor life neither good report nor evil report may separate me from thy love O let thy kindness and the benefits of thy Sons death and passion and resurrection appear to me in such characters that I may long to be fill'd with all the fulness of God Thy Spirit is perfect Light and there is no darkness with him O let that glorious Light dissipate that gloominess those foggs that confusedness that is in my intellectual part make me conceive clearly and distinctly what I must do to inherit Eternal life and how I must carry myself to God and Man Give me such a sight of thy Glory as may lift me up above the world and engage me to have my Conversation in Heaven Bow my Will to conform entirely to thy Will I would not be mine so much as thine Come Lord and take the government of my Soul into thy hand I have too long suffer'd my self to be guided by merciless Tyrants art thou not my Master my Prince my Father thou hast the greatest right to rule me Incline my Will unto thy Testimonies and not to Covetousness when my Will would wander from thy Precepts cross it and put a stop to it that it may not goe beyond the limits of thy Law O heal my affections they hanker too much after this Earth O make them in love with Heaven chide them for deserting their highest and their chiefest good let my hatred pitch upon no other object but sin let my Love be carried out after nothing so much as thee and if I love any thing besides let me love it only for thy sake let my hopes be fixed upon immortality engrosse thou my desires let me fear none but thee let my chief delight be in thy ways and ordinances strengthen my resolutions O deliver me from that fickleness I have so long been guilty of make my purposes firm let them be as the Mountains of God which can never be moved let nothing be able to weaken my good intentions give me courage to fight the good fight O Lord in thy strength I 'll resist by thy Power I will conquer my heart hath lock'd the out O knock again and if it will not yield break open the door and let all my corruptions vanish at thy Presence O Lord I beg no Riches no Honours no Preferments if I have but Food and Raiment I will learn therewith to be contented it s thy Grace I want establish me with thy free Spirit give me spiritual Wisdom even that wisdom which makes me wise unto Salvation thou art nigh unto them that call upon thee yea unto all such as call upon thee faithfully O cast me not away from thy Presence I am thine O save me order my steps according to thy word when I read it let me read it with that attention as to observe and take notice of what thou dost command when I hear it let me hear it as if it were the last time that ever I should hear it let thy Oracles make deeper impressions on me than ever dash all those evasions and excuses I used to alleage when I have had no mind to obey thee let the good motions of thy Spirit prevail O that there should be such difficulty in conquering a poor sinner O that God should be forced to carress me to my happiness O that Heaven should attract me no more O that God should need to send out messengers to entreat me to come to the Supper of the Lamb Lord take away this dulness make me mount up with wings as Eagles Let me not be able to goe out of thy Presence till I have fully and unfeignedly resolved to give my self up to thy service O Jesu the light of the world who enlightenst every man that comes into the world where thou dwellest there Mercy dwells O dwell in my Soul and Mercy and Truth will kiss each other there teach me to hate my self not only for the hurt I have done to my self but for the injuries and indignities I have offer'd thee I was a horrid monster thou by thy death madest me a pleasing spectacle in the sight of Heaven I lay
own Bloud to this end thou eatest of his Bread and drinkest of his Wine and thus thou sealest the Covenant Dost not thou remember O my Soul how the world Was lost by eating of the forbidden Tree Behold by eating of this Tree of Life thou shalt be saved for ever in the breaking of the consecrated Bread thou seest how Christs Body was broke for thee in pouring out of the Hallow'd Wine thou seest how Christs Bloud was spilt for thee when the Holy Bread is reach'd out to thee thou seest Christ reaching out his crucified Body to thee that thou mayest see in his hands the print of the nails and put thy finger into the print of his nails and thrust thine hand into his side and shelter thy self under that wounded and mangled Body against the wrath and indignation of God When the sacred Wine is given thee thou seest how Christ offers thee his Bloud for the remission of thy sins canst thou behold so great a love and not loose thy reason in the admiration of its greatness when thou seest such condescension such kindness such compassion O canst thou forbear crying out O my Lord what do I see what mean these longings of Almighty God after my happiness what means this industry of that incomprehensible Being to be at all this charge and pains to make me blessed God that might sport himself with my everlasting groans what need he have cared whether I were saved or no God Who can be happy without company and needs no society but his own whence is it that this mighty God humbles himself thus to dust and ashes layes aside his Robes of Glory and wooes me to be content to lye for ever in his Arms and Bosom would no other remedy serve turn to recover me but the death of the Son of God God on whose Laws I have trampled Whose Authority I have slighted whose promises and threatenings I have undervalued that he should be thus concern'd for my welfare and contrive how to advance me unto Glory and contrive it by such stupendious means too will God suffer that I may not will the Eternal dye that I may not fall a prey to the second Death will God be crown'd with Thorns that I may wear an incorruptible Crown of Glory will God be affronted abus'd and scorn'd that I may inherit Glory and Honor and immortality what manner of love is this where is the spring of it what 's the impulsive cause of it how full of miracles is every circumstance here how pleasant is this contemplation What! God love a little slime and earth O my God! how wonderful is thy love it is all Ocean here is no shore to set my feet on be astonish'd at it O ye Heavens and tremble O thou Earth the Eternal the Immense Creator of Heaven and Earth stoops to a miserable creature the God who fills Heaven and Earth with his Presence bows down to a poor inconsiderable worm he that sits on the circle of the Earth and before whom all the Inhabitants of the Earth are as Grashoppers humbles himself to take notice of a poor forlorn wretch Here is love indeed Stay me with flaggons comfort me with apples my Head grows giddy with the Precipice here is an abyss of Love which I cannot fathom my head swims at the sight of it Sense can furnish me with nothing like it I am silenc'd here is a love answers all arguments that are brought for going on in sin Help me O thou blessed Spirit Help me O thou who art fairer than the Children of Men Help me thou who art all Love and Life Help me to admire thy Love In this Love are a thousand charms in this Love are omnipotent enforcives to love God above all the world Run O my Soul run into this Banqueting-house the Banner whereof is Love Is it so and must thou have perish'd and been undone for ever if the Son of God had not come in the Flesh and expiated thy crimes and doth not that Almighty love deserve thy Love see how the ambitious love the applause of men and wilt not thou love him who is brighter than the Sun see how the rich man is enamour'd with his stately Pallace and canst not thou love him who hath done that for thee which no Friend no Money no Gold no Silver could have purchas'd viz. reconciled thee to an offended God wilt thou slight this Love and hope to go unpunish'd wilt thou make this Love a refuge for wilful sins and hope for the light of Christs countenance will not he who loved thee beyond all presidents and examples double and treble his indignation upon thee if this Love cannot melt thee into a truly Spiritual life could the Devils but have such an offer of being partakers of the love of Christ how would they rejoyce and triumph and Love and Honour and Obey their God again as once they did when they were inhabitants of Heaven and wilt thou beworse than a Devil and spurn at that Love which Angels stand astonish'd at were it thine own case O my Sou wouldst not thou revenge such ingratitude with all the severity imaginable and doom the wretch that should affront such condescension to the direst Flames Be wise O my Soul and provoke not that God to swear in his wrath that thou shalt never enter into his rest who flees unto thee on the wings of mercy to embrace thee thou canst never have a more glorious sight of Gods love on this side Heaven than is discovered to thee in this Sacrament and if ever thou wouldst be perswaded to resign thy self entirely to thy Blessed Redeemer make his Will thy Will and desire what he desires and hate what he hates and love what he loves O come hither to the cross and see the Son of God weeping for thy sins come hither and see him sweat drops of Bloud for thy iniquities and offering thee pardon and reconciliation and peace with God and access to the Throne of Grace and union and communion with him and if this be not enough a title to Eternal Happiness or a right to that Throne himself doth sit on But why so backward O my Soul to come to the Table of thy Lord where thou mayst drink Wine and Milk without Money and without Price where thou mayst be satisfied as with marrow and fatness and eat of the living Bread whereof whoever eats shall live for ever hast thou forgot the peremptory command of Christ Do this in remembrance of me Is this remembring thy dearest friend to think of him solemnly but once or twice a year shouldst not thou remember him as often as thou hast an opportunity should thy Saviour remember thee no oftner than thou dost his death and passion how fearful would thy condition be canst thou represent his Love too often to thy mind and affections canst thou remember thy sins that brought him to the Cross too often art thou afraid of thinking too much of this
apparently dangerous Thus it is with me why should I deny it Why should I call light darkness and darkness light put bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter Whom do I cheat all this while is it not my own Soul And what shall I gain by it in the end Shall I think my self sufficiently holy when I am so little acquainted with the first rudiments of Holiness Shall I think my self a Child of God when that which I do is fitter for a Child of the Devil than for a Favourite of Heaven Conversion or turning to God which the Holy Ghost doth so often and with that vehemence and earnestness inculcate implies an universal change of my disposition and inclinations And where is that alteration that renovation of the Mind Will and Affections My Affections are carried out after Froth and smoke as much as ever My Love is set on Trifles and is regardless of the highest and chiefest good as much as ever I hate Seriousness and delight in childish impertinent Gayeties as much as ever The promises of the Gospel are as inconsiderable in my eyes and the riches of this World as glorious and ravishing as ever and I can dispense with the want of spiritual consolations while I have but my share in these outward comforts My feet run in the wayes of destruction and my eyes are dazled with external pomp and grandeur as much as ever An amorous Song is more pleasing to me than the most harmonious Psalm The Word of God is but a dead Letter to me while a Romance or a Book that Treats of Folly and Vanity Transports me into more than ordinary content and satisfaction And what I must eat And what I must drink And wherewithall I shall be cloathed Are questions I have a far greater desire to be resolved in than to know what I must do to please God and to be happy for ever If I have made light of the Thunders and Threatnings of Scripture I do so still If I have prefer'd my secular Interest before Gods Honour and Glory I do so still If I have feared Men more than God I do so still If I have been loth to do good with the Temporal blessings God hath confer'd upon me I am so still And what Sins I leave it 's more because I have no inclination to them or because I am afraid they 'll spoil and blemish my Reputation in the World than because I love that God who made me and hath obliged me by a thousand Favours to esteem and prize him above all And is this the Coat of the Sons of God Is this the Livery of a Christian indeed Is this done like a Man that lives upon Gods Bounty is fed by his Charity supported by his Alms and maintain'd from his Store-house and cannot subsist one moment without his Concourse and hath not a better Friend in all the World than him who is the Fountain of living Waters Consideration one great design of it being to know how the case stands between God and our own Souls such a Self-examination must of necessity be the Corner stone of this spiritual Building and comparing our Lives with the Rules of the Gospel and the proper characters of such as are in a likely way to enjoy God for ever may justly challenge the first Seat in this intellectual Paradise But then as building of a stately Gate without a House answerable to it doth but expose the Builder to derision and contempt so Self-Examination without a serious Expostulation with our own hearts is but to make the Accuser of our Brethren laugh at our vain attempts and God scorn the endeavour that could be crusht in the Bud and tired before half its Race is run II. Expostulation rouzes the Soul from her Slumber and drives it away from the soft Doune it would have rested and repos'd it self upon and gives the first blow for Self-Examination only threatens it to that Tree of Death I mean to the reigning power of Sin and I see not how Sin can shelter it self any longer or what excuses it can make for its stay and continuance where the Soul doth summon it to appear before the Bar of Conscience and enters into such reasonings and interrogations as these Are these things so and do I stand trifling with my salvation Do I run the hazard of everlasting flames and do I lie playing in the Suburbs of destruction Either I believe an eternity of Torments that shall attend a careless sinful life or I do not If not why dare not I profess my denial Why do I play the Hypocrite and make the World think I do believe it What 's the reason that I cannot shake off the fears of it if I would never so fain Why does something within me check me when I would be so profane as to deny it Can I ever be serious and not believe it But then if I believe it what a mad Man am I to loyter when the Candle I am allow'd to work by is almost burnt out and I know not how soon it may please my great Master to extinguish it Do I lead a life which is the readiest way to eternal Vengeance and shall I not step back and prevent it Can I imagine God will blow out that everlasting Fire to gratifie my vicious temper or destroy that Tophet out of tenderness to my Lusts and Corruptions Can I conceive it possible that God will go from his Word to please a stubborn Sinner or prove a Lyar that I may go with greater ease to Heaven Do I know that I shall be miserable if I continue in that course I have held on in hitherto and am I in love with eternal ruine Am I certain that Iniquity will be my confusion and am I resolv'd to dye I have all the reason in the World to believe that it was the Son of God that was the Author of those Threatnings and Comminations I find in the Gospel Do I believe him to be the Son of God and can I imagine that the least tittle of his words will perish I have run up and down in the World these many years and hunted-after those Vanities which sensual Men do dote upon But will these save me when I dye Will not the remembrance of my eager pursuit after these Butterflies and Gaudes fill me with anguish and sorrow Have I liv'd in the World all this while and am not I nearer Heaven than I was some years ago Must my body engross all my endeavours and must my Soul be starved I have a Soul that cannot dye and must not dye and must shortly appear before Gods Tribunal and shall not I study its safety and happiness as much as I am able Lord God! should Death arrest me before I have made my Calling and Election sure how fearful how wretched would my condition be should it fall to my share to howle in outward Darkness how should I curse the day that ever I was born should those Tortures the
share in that reconciliation to God through Jesus Christ but those that turn to God with all their hearts and with all their souls and are weary of sin and heavy laden with the sense of it and in sober sadness resolv'd to submit to Christs yoke and government for though all mankind share in the possibility of enjoying this reconciliation and the Pardon may be truly said to be purchas'd for them and for their use yet all are not made partakers of the actual possession of it because all men will not consent to fulfill the conditions upon which that reconciliation is offer'd them viz. unfeign'd repentance and sincere obedience for the time to come Shimei was a man condemn'd to death 1 Kings 2.36 it 's like some Courtiers of Solomon got him his Pardon the King grants it but requires this one thing of him that he shall build him a house in Jerusalem and dwell there and go not forth thence any whither and fulfilling this condition without all peradventure he might have liv'd happy and safe as the best of his Neighbors but when he must needs be running after his servants and prefer a small advantage before perpetual safety he justly suffers the punishment the King appointed for him The Son of God by the blood of his Cross hath in truth gotten all Christians their Pardon but is resolv'd none shall enjoy it but those that will forsake their sins and resign themselves to his guidance and direction A reasonable demand a condition so equitable so just so easie that no man in his wits but must say as Shimei unto Solomon The saying is good As my Lord the King hath said so will thy servant do But then if the Pardon the Son of God hath obtain'd for them appear so inconsiderable a thing in their eyes that they do not think it worth enjoying and certainly they do not think it worth enjoying that will not agree to so reasonable a condition no marvel if they fall a prey to that wrath from which the Son of God is ready to deliver them and if their blood be upon their heads that do despight unto the Spirit of Grace and count the blood of the Covenant wherewith they were to be sanctified an unholy thing So that although a true Believer and a sincere Penitent may boldly say with the Apostle That Christ hath redeem'd him from the Curse of the Law being made a Curse for him Gal. 3.13 And that ChriSt hath wash'd him from his sins with his own blood Rev. 1.5 And that he hath an Advocate with the Father Jesus Christ the righteous who is the propitiation for his sins 1 John 2.1 And that Chris't hath made his peace with God Col. 1.20 Yet men that are strangers to the sanctifying work of Gods Spirit cannot be said to have at present during their unregenerate estate any other benefit by the death and passion of Christ but a possibility of all those great and glorious advantages and it 's possible for them to be freed from the Curse of the Law to be admitted into the number of those that shall be sav'd to enjoy remission of sins to escape the wrath to come and to see God face to face in Heaven and all this by virtue of Christ's death if they will but shake hands with their darling Vices and agree to a practical love of their Maker and Redeemer and Sanctifier To think that unconverted sinners do actually enjoy these benefits is to contradict Scripture and to give the Apostles of our Lord the Lye who unanimously tells us That these mercies are not effectually apply'd to the Soul till the Soul by sincere repentance and reformation of life applies herself to Christ Jesus And indeed this is the prodigious mercy of the second Covenant that God for Christ's sake will accept of sincere repentance in stead of perfect obedience which was the great condition of the first agreement between God and man and looking upon the precious blood of his Son will pass by whatever Men have done before if they will be in love with sin and destruction no longer and sincerely endeavor to please him in those commands which design nothing but our interest and happiness These things are not very hard to be understood but the generality of Christians seem resolv'd not to understand them that they may not be obliged to take their ways into serious Consideration This Doctrine That Christ hath freed them from the wrath of God in their sense makes Religion sit soft and easie upon them and doth not disturb them in their sensual enjoyments It 's a comfortable Doctrine to flesh and blood never could any thing have been invented more agreeable to their Lusts and if God had studied to do them a kindness he could not have done them a greater than to let his Son suffer all that is to be suffer'd by them and so after their delights and sinful satisfactions here conduct them into a far more glorious Paradise If it be so truly Consideration is Vanity and the Preachers are Fools and mad Men to press it upon their Auditors But who sees not that this is an invention of the Devil first to darken the sinners understanding and when the Candle is out to rob him of his everlasting happiness And Sirs will you be rob'd thus quietly of your bliss and glory Will you suffer yourselves to be stript of all you have without the least opposition Is it possible for you to believe That the Son of God came down from Heaven to encourage you in offending God and made himself of no reputation for you that you might render your selves contemptible in the sight of the Almighty and dyed for you to give life to your sins and follies How absurd how impertinent how contradictory is this Belief Love God and encourage sin Holiness itself and find out a way to promote iniquity Can there be any thing in Nature more silly or ridiculous This is abusing the Cross of Christ not trusting to it and you that make it an occasion of sin take heed it do not prove a stumbling block unto you and instead of Crucifying sin in you do not harden you in it It is a thing not unusual with God to punish sin with sin and if Men will be filthy in despite of all endeavors to purifie them from their filthinesses to doom them to continue filthy still and to make that their judgment which at first was only their transgression so great a love and written in such legible characters too slighted and abused and made a help to sin improved into licentiousness may justly be supposed to draw down that judgment we read of Isa. 6.9 10. Go and tell this People Hear ye indeed but understand not and see ye indeed but perceive not Make the heart of this People fat and make their ears heavy and shut their eyes lest they see with their eyes and hear with their ears and understand with their heart and convert
and promis'd all my Estate to after some few years service and should that Servant instead of honouring me despise me where ever he comes instead of obeying me laugh at my reasonable commands instead of Working play his time away instead of going to the place I send him to run to Brothel-Houses or Taverns instead of loving me hate me and affront me slight both my actual kindesses and my future smiles and notwithstanding my continual exhortations to another course of life continue wilfully in the way he hath begun meerly to gratify his foolish Lusts and when he is convinc'd too of the unreasonableness of his doings knows it is Ingratitude in the highest Degree and yet will be guilty of it and when he might do otherwise only out of malice and to vindicate his own humour resolves against it what punishment can there be too great for such a wretch Were this mine or my neighbors case we should certainly doom such a monster to all the Tortures that severity can invent or inflict and why should I have any hard thoughts of God for punishing the sinners Ingratitude with eternal pain and loss an ingratitude so great all things consider'd that the worst returns one man can make to another cannot sufficiently express the horror and vileness of it God for ought I see in condemning wilful sinners to Eternal misery gives them but their own choice and if that old saying be true Volenti non fit injuria To him that 's willing can be done no injury God certainly cannot be accus'd of cruelty for he gives the stubborn sinner but that which he deliberately pitcht upon and affected and though no man doth ordinarily chuse punishment much less everlasting calamity for its own self yet as long as they do with vehement affection long after that which hath this calamity inseparably annext we justly suppose that they agree to suffer the calamity as well as to enjoy the thing which is the others inseparable companion He that is certain that the smell of such an Herb or Flower is poisonous and will kill him if notwithstanding this conviction he will smell to it its apparent he makes choice of his death and ruine There is not a sinner that lives under the Gospel but he must know that he who doth not practically believe the Gospel or which is all one lives in wilful contempt of the Laws of the Gospel shall certainly be damn'd for the Gospel is so full of these threatenings that he that doth but come to any place where this word of life is preach'd if he be not deaf he must necessarily hear it nay if he will but make the least enquiry and set himself to consider seriously whether that Gospel be of God or no he cannot but find that it is the Son of God even he who can assoon loose his being as tell a lye that hath with all the protestations imaginable threatened this everlasting condemnation to Men that are resolv'd to prefer satisfaction of their Lust before all his wisest and wholsomest Precepts This being known by all that have any reason or understanding as much as that Felony or Burglary is death by the Law if in despight of this knowledge and perswasion the hard-hearted wretch will venture upon a life of disobedience and contempt to which damnation is inseparably annext What can I think but that the vain Man is in Love with his own Eternal destruction In Love with it So one would think that sees him drive to everlasting death as furiously as Jehu did to Jezreel and make more haste to invade the Gates of Hell than Elijah for all his fiery Chariot did to get to Heaven The Man that runs through Swords and Daggers breaks down Walls and Fences poisons the principles of Sobriety Providence hath lodg'd in his Breast strangles the kind suggestions of his own Conscience cracks the Bolts and Barrs of a virtuous Education seeks out Dangers and precipitates himself into them and with the noise of his riot strives to overcome the calls of the Holy Ghost within defies all present convictions dis-regards the Groans and Cryes and Tears and Wounds of a crucified Saviour that would keep him from being undone vanquishes Gods methods to catch him into Repentance breaks through all the prohibitions of the Gospel through Vows and Promises and Sacraments and most solemn Engagements charges all the threatenings of a jealous God and fights his way through Rocks of oppositions and all to get to Hell and Damnation sure makes that his choice and if so God doth him no injury in giving him his own hearts desire A Sheep or a Horse certainly can never counter-ballance the life of a Man yet he that knows he shall be hanged if he steal either and will in despight of the penalty venture meerly to gratify his sickly fancy justly suffers the punishment which seems to bear no proportion with the things he stole the justice of the punishment is founded in the malefactors choice And so we find it in the case before us the Blessing and the Curse is laid before the sensual Man Life and death are proposed to him he 's put to his choice which of these he 'l have He freely and willfully chuses Death and the Curse maugre all that God or his Angels or his Ministers can say to the contrary and it 's but just since he thus fights against God and seems resolved to cross all God's endeavours to purify and turn him and will have his wrath and indignation and scorns his Mercy God should let him have that Fire and Brimstone which is the portion of the Sinners Cup and which he is so very greedy after as if he were afraid he should never be so happy as to obtain or be master of it Indeed the more I think of it the more I find that it s not God so much that condemns him to Eternal misery as the sinner himself 'T is he that 's thus barbarous to his own Soul and adjudges himself to that worm which dies not He kisses that consuming Fire as if it were the Light of God's Countenance and seems to envy the Devils their unhappiness he doth so long to be a sharer of it He snatches Damnation out of the hands of God's Justice and while God offers to keep it from him makes a long Arm to reach it God alas doth what he can to save him his bowels yearn over him and nothing would please him more than to see his penitential Tears He is ready with the good Father Luk 15.20 To run and to have compassion on him as soon as he doth but resolve to leave the Kingdom of Darkness even that God who would have all men to be saved and come to the knowledge of the Truth He waits to be gracious and justly expects that the Vineyard on which he hath bestowed great cost and pains should bring forth Grapes He doth not afflict the Children of Men willingly he delights not in their tortures he
and send his Spirit so to move upon her affections so to actuate her endeavours so to encourage her with promises that it may not lye in the power of the Devil nor in the power of her Lusts to gain-say or contradict or dash the resolutions she hath taken where the Soul doth with strong desires pour out these her requests before God the good Father opens the Gates of Heaven le ts in the Messenger makes him welcome smiles upon him and sends him back laden with Mercy and puts words into his mouth and bids him tell the Soul boldly from that God who heareth Prayer I have heard thee in an acceptable time in the day of Salvation have I succour'd thee I 'll pour out my Spirit upon thee I will open a river in high places and fountains in the midst of valleys I will make thy wilderness a pool of water and thy dry land springs of water I will plant in the wilderness the Cedar and the Myrtle and the Oil-tree I will set in the Desart that thou mayst see and know and consider and understand together that the hand of the Lord hath done this and the Holy one of Israel hath created it 2 Cor. 6.2 Es. 41.18 19 20. Up then Christian who art resolved not to let the concerns of thy Soul lye at six and sevens who art afraid to hazard Eternity with the careless besotted world like another Lazarus beg Alms of the King of Heaven Cry aloud and spare not shew him thy wounds thy ulcers thy poverty thy want thy necessity let a greater fervency attend thy Prayer for Spiritual blessings than others use in begging for Temporal Mercies Prayer is the way to be enrich'd with all the Treasures of Heaven seek Gods assistance with tears in thine eyes remember thy Soul is infinitely more precious than thy Body and if a Beggar in the street is so earnest with those that pass by to give him something for the relief of his corporal wants oughtst not thou to be all fire to procure those blessings which will enrich thy Soul for ever Josephs Brethren were pinch'd with Famine because they knew not that their Brother reign'd in Aegypt why shouldst thou starve Christian when thy elder Brother reigns in Heaven who knows what thou wantest and is a faithful High Priest and is touch'd with the feeling of thy infirmities and was in all points tempted even as thou art Come boldly to the throne of Grace that thou mayst obtain mercy and find help in the time of need If God hath done good to others for his servants sake who have pleased him what will not God do for thee for his Sons sake in whom alone he is well pleased if God doth so highly esteem the Piety of Men that he professes for my servant Jacob's sake for my servant David's sake I will be kind to such a one will he derogate dost thou think from the merits and love of his own Son will he harden his heart or stop his ears or turn away his eyes when thou callest upon him for Christs sake to send down upon thee the day-spring from on high Christ is the very object of Gods delight nothing is sweet nothing is pleasing to him but through and in Christ what ever is amiable and acceptable in us it is for Christ his sake that God doth think it so Without light all colours are invisible there is no beauty in them the light shining upon them makes them look lovely and amiable without Christ nothing would appear pure or lovely or great or delightful He that looks on a green Glass fancies all things he looks upon to be green God looking upon our Holy endeavours in Christ Jesus they all appear to him lovely and good because all that Christ did was good and infinitely pleasing to him The world had perish'd ten thousand times if God had not look'd upon it through his Son and so supported it he that looks through a Glass upon a stinking carcass afar off doth not smell the ill scent of it so God through Christ looks upon our imperfections and he smells not the ill savour of our performances Take courage then and lay hold on the horns of this Altar and if thou knowest not what to say when thou hast taken a serious view of thy ways make use of this or some other Form Oh thou who art the Father of the Spirits of all flesh the Father of lights with whom there is no variableness nor shadow of turning here lies a poor miserable sinful wretch before thee not worthy to lift up his eyes and hands to Heaven I know not where to look for shame and confusion of face so long have I gone astray from thee so often have I provoked thee so often have I slighted thee so often have I turned thy grace into wantonness so long have I hunted after broken Cisterns which can hold no water forsaking the Fountain of living water that thou mayst justly absent thy self from me for ever so disingenuously have I dealt with thee so often have I endeavoured to blind thy all-seeing Eye and to cheat my self that thou mightst justly cause me to fall a prey to Satan look stern upon me and charge me never any more to see thy face O wretched creature that I am who shall deliver me from the body of this death Oh my Lord how often hast thou darted Rays of Light into my Soul and the impure fire of my Lusts hath prevailed against them how often hast thou suggested to my Soul the danger it hath been in and yet I have not trembled how often hast thou stung my heart prick'd it and goaded it into serious reflexions and how soon hath this vain world taken me off again and dull'd and dash'd those considerations how often hast thou sent sparks of Grace into my Soul while I have done what I could to smother that Holy fire how justly mightst thou say My Spirit shall no longer strive with thee O my God there is no plague no punishment that 's threatned in thy Law but I have deserved it I only stand amazed at thy patience that I have escaped so long without being consumed and ruined Wilt thou receive such a Prodigal into thy favour wilt thou be reconcil'd to so great a rebel wilt thou pass by unkindesses of so deep a Dye are the gates of Mercy open yet for so vile a wretch Doe not I come too late O my Lord to the throne of Grace will God be yet intreated for such a poor forlorn creature Is there yet compassion left for such a poor sinner O my God I question not thy Power but thy Will to pity such a Traitor as I have been I know thy Mercy is infinite it would be a disparagement to thy Glory and Perfection to deny the exceeding riches of thy Grace thou couldst not be God if my sins exceeded thy power to forgive but when I reflect on thy threatenings how justly thou denouncest wrath
the bows and cringes whereby both great and small insinuate into her favour On her Head Draw a Tree whose Fruit is Gold and the Dew whereof hardens into Pearls let her right hand grasp a Crown and her left drop gifts on her Clients and Votaries But then when this proud Peacock is drawn thus in all her dazling circles forget not to Draw her ugly feet I mean an unquiet roaring disturb'd distracted trembling Conscience for into this dismal shape doth that lovely Mermaid end On the other side I 'll paint a Wilderness a Grove which wise Nature made and in it I 'll represent a devout Soul kneeling and with the Publican smiting upon her Breast then will I draw Heaven and out of that Heaven Grace and Mercy in the shape of an Angel flying down with this message Fear not I have redeemed thee thou art mine and holding a bottle under to catch her Tears immediately upon this the Holy Ghost shall be seen descending spreading his beams and warming that Soul and invigorating it to resist the World the Flesh and the Devil by and by the Glory of God shall appear and crown all with Peace and Joy and infinite content and Eternal Hallelujahs And now Sinner which of these Pictures wouldst thou chuse do not the homely feet of the former fright thee can all the Beauty thou seest in that painted Harlot countervail the misery it dies into is an ever-gnawing Conscience matter of sport and laughter when all these painted Gaudes must break into a dismal Dungeon wilt thou laugh awhile that thou mayst mourn and lament for ever But if thou art so fond of this dangerous Garden that nothing can reclaim thee from being delighted with it take thy choice give me the other Landskip I know this world Men are so fond of e're long will have an end and their pleasures will have an end and their sins will have an end and their glory will have an end but where these end Gods Justice and Indignation begins Blessed is the man that hath then the God of Jacob for his refuge the Lord will deliver him in the time of trouble what if I enjoy none of the worlds want on solaces I know where better and stronger Consolations are to be had what if Thorns and Bryars surround my Lillies and Roses I know they are but to preserve them and to hinder the Devil from tearing them to pieces these Thorns are my safeguard which will e're long be done away and when I am out of the reach of all enemies my Lillies will continue fresh and flourishing for ever what need I covet the world when I am made to live above the world what should I love this Earth for when I have a God to love why should I dote on Nature when I am in the state of Grace God hath made me many glorious promises how can I forbear rejoycing under the thoughts of them By Grace I am made partaker of the Divine Nature wonderful Dignity Being advanc'd so high why should I be enamour'd with a little Dust when God hath made me a King why should I debase my self or stoop to the mean employment of a Peasant I know God doth not see as man doth see a Soul that loves him above all is more esteemed in his sight than the proudest Monarch nor do rags fright him from fixing his habitation there where he meets with an humble broken heart let others glory in their great Titles in this I 'll glory that I am a Child of God Who can express the Honour God bestows on those that give their hearts to him To be a Child of God is infinitely greater Honor than to be of Kin to Princes or to have the Bloud of Nobles running in my veins A Father expresses greater endearments to him that participates of his nature and draws his substance from him than to him that 's only like him in the face how far greater love then may I conceive in God to a Child which by grace is a partaker of the Divine Nature than to the blessed Angels themselves The whole Creation in a manner participates of the Divine Nature but all other Creatures are but Pictures painted Images of that Glorious Nature he that is a Child of God is a lively Image of his Father which is in Heaven and he hath Fellowship and communion with the Father and his Son Jesus Christ. What mysteries are these things to a poor Worldling but Oh how comfortable to him that feels the good Spirit bearing witness with his Spirit that he is a Child of God! If God be my Father then all the Riches he hath are mine if he be my Father he cannot but take special care of me for Can a Mother forget her sucking Child that she should not have compassion on the Fruit of her womb yea she may forget yet will I not forget thee behold I have engraven thee on the palms of my hand Esay 49.15 16. Fathers sometimes expose their own lives to save their Sons God hath done infinitely more for me for he assumed humane Nature and exposed his life for me who was his Enemy and a Traitor to him that I might become his Son By Grace I am the friend of God if God had not taken me for his Child yet how excellent how incomprehensible would the favour be that he vouchsafes to take me into the number of his friends what a stir do men keep to purchase the friendship of Great Men how little do they esteem the friendship of the Almighty they have not Souls clear enough to admire the Mercy their understandings are too earthy to adore so great a bounty it requires too much Spirit and Mind to be ravished with such compassion A Friend is often loved better than neer Relations What may not I promise my self from this Love and Friendship of God What calamity or misery is there in which this love cannot hold my Head and keep it from aking To be loved of God is to be fed with the richest stream and to live upon Milk and Honey If God laid down his life for his enemies what will not he do for his friends when I was his enemy God seemed to love me more than he did himself and now that I am his friend shall I think he will love me less than an enemy How should I rejoyce to have such a friend as Jonathan was but alas what is this friendship to Gods love All humane friendship is perfect perfidiousness in comparison of Gods friendship God so loves his friends that he knows not how to be separated from them if God had no other place to move in but Heaven he would leave that Heaven and come down and joyn himself to those whom by his Spirit he hath adopted into the number of his friends so great so immense is his love to them He that is a friend of God becomes Gods individual companion What a favour would it have been counted if the
Son of God when he was on Earth would have joyned himself to one particular man and would have never departed from him What a priviledge then must it be for one who is Gods friend to have the Divinity always present with him not only as a companion but as an inhabitant for he dwells in us by his spirit Did ever any Father love his Son so as never to part company did ever any Mother love her Child as never to suffer it to goe from her Arms But God is continually embracing his friends Among Men a Father cannot be always there where his Son is but God knows not how to be from him that is his friend and though God be in all creatures by his Essence Presence and Power yet that is because he is God with a Gracious Soul he is because that Soul is his friend and if God were not immense and infinite and could not be with his other creatures yet he would be with such a Soul with whom he is one Spirit and if he could forget things yet he could not forget such a Soul or lay aside the thoughts of his prosperity and welfare and if he could forsake his other creatures yet he could not forsake such a Soul but would work always some good or other in her for Gods love being strong it s always active and where God bears a good Will to a Soul he cannot but communicate goodness to her And shall I after all this repine because I am not a Favourite of Kings and Princes when I have God for my constant guide and associate How should I stand amazed at the strangeness of the favour if God should charge all the Angels of Heaven all the ten thousand times ten thousand Spirits which wait upon him to goe and attend such a man with all the Grandeur and Majesty imaginable yet what is all this but a desart to Gods society in having him for my associate I enjoy more Dignity more Majesty more Pomp and Glory than if I had all the Armies of Heaven waiting upon me and can I think God is always with me and will not provide for me If I should neglect all things in the world and mind nothing but the things of God and my Fathers business I might he confident that he would feed me and support me because so Great so Good so Almighty so kind a friend could not see me perish The Son of God hath not honoured any Angel with the name of Brother and yet if I am united to him by Grace and by his Spirit I enjoy this priviledge and as Mothers love those Children most for which they have suffered and endured most so I may be confident that God loves me most fervently because he hath suffered for me on the Cross and endured most bitter tortures and agonies for me How may I exult how may I triumph in this love O my God! the Angels for the least drop of that Grace thou hast bestowed on them are more beholding to thee than all other creatures for all their natural gifts and for the creation of the whole world but for the least degree of Grace thou hast conferred on me I am more beholding to thee than all the Angels in Heaven for that I might live by Grace thou delivered thine own Son the Son of thy Bosom the brightness of his Fathers Glory to be crucified and to dye for me which is more than thou hast done for all the Angels in Heaven and thus thou hast obliged me more than thou hast done the Heavenly Cherubins and Seraphins Farewel ungrateful treacherous World I have seen enough of thy deceitful Presents I 'll follow thy weak judgement no longer I 'll esteem no Riches but what my Saviour hath counted so In following him I cannot erre self-denial and doing the Will of God were the Treasures he studied to be master of why should not I judge that to be Riches which God hath judged so why should not my mind agree with the verdict of the Most High Nay when God doth love me so entirely why should not I for love of him conform my understanding to his judgement I see those that love the world at the same time confess that they ought to love the everlasting Riches more for if the fading things deserve their love things permanent and solid and eternal ought to be loved much more I will not think much of afflictions now for I find that God by them would make me weary of my fondness to perishable trash and elevate and raise my Soul to embrace those Treasures which neither Men nor Devils can steal away Physitians I see when they would cure a sick man make him sicker than he is by enjoyning him abstinence by adustions by vomitives by putting him to greater torments I know my Soul is sick God would make it perfectly well but such is my sickness that God must put me to pain and anguish and great trouble before I can be well my Heart is all Flint but when this stone is struck sufficiently it will then send forth Holy Fire when my Flesh is weak my Strength will retire more to my Mind and Understanding and I shall be fitter for Heaven The glorified Bodies of Saints in the last day will be the more splendid and illustrious the more they have been afflicted and tortured here and shine the more the more dismal the Dungeon was they were kept in during their abode in this valley of Tears Why should I weep when God takes away from me the cause of weeping How many thousands are now weeping in Hell because they enjoyâ—d so much of the worlds comforts and made them occasions of affronting their Creator Shall I count that loss which is my gain and call my want of Riches a misfortune when it is the greatest remedy to fit my Soul for Heaven what is impudence is it in me to desire that of God which I ought to hate at the most love but with fear and trembling What inhumanity to my self is it to beg poison of the Father of Lights and to murmure that he gives me not that Viper which will sting me into endless tortures My love of the world is Adultery and shall I desire that wherewith I have committed Adultery Is it not all one as if a woman should entreat her Husband to let her enjoy the pleasure of an unlawful Bed the Husband doth shew great mercy to her in that when he might punish her more severely he only removes the Adulterer and shall I count that mercy an injury In wishing for the Riches and Greatnesses of this world I do as much desire God to give me that whereby I may offend him Shall I be angry with a Chirurgeon who to prevent the spreading of my Cancer cuts off a Member to preserve my life and shall I take it ill of God for wounding my Flesh to draw out the Arrows that stick in my heart and would fester and kill me if not