many thinges which are filthy and childish And of this loue the prouerbe doth saye that it is scarcely graunted to God to loue to be wise loue wine are in thy power or euer thou drinke but after y t thou haste dronken y u shalte be their subiect seruaunte And of this she shal iudge the to be vaine light vnapt and folishe Nor thou canst not kepe thy maiestie in such filthy loue for Ouide doth say that maiesty loue doeth not agree nor remain nor tary not in one place But y e poet doth speake of this erthly and blind loue for cordiall and wyse loue doeth not diminishe maiestye Nor a woman can not suffer nor take hym for her maister that was some tyme her seruaunt And the weaker a wo man is in mynde the more she desyreth to be in power and yf she had once domination and rule she taketh it as an iniurie yf she rule not styl Nor there is no rule moore violente or moore greuous then theirs that by al reason ought to be subiectes as the rule of seruauntes artificers children and women But as we woulde that the man whē he loueth shoulde remember his maiestye so we woulde that when he ruleth he forget not hys loue nor to temper it with maiestye And when he doth thinke him selfe to be the head and the soule and the woman as it wer the fleshe the bodye He oughte in lyke manner to remembre that she is hys felow compa nion of his goods labours and that their children be cōmon betwene theym bone of bones and fleshe of the fleshe of man And thus ther shalbe in wedlocke a certayne swete and pleasaunt conuersation withoute the whiche it is no maryage but a prysone a hatred a perpetual torment of the mynde Let thy wyfe per ceyue and knowe that for the good opinion that thou haste of her y t doest loue her simply and faythfullye and not for anye vtilite or pleasure For who so doeth not perceyue that he is beloued for hys owne sake wyl not lightly do the same to another for the thynge that is loued loueth agayn If money or nobilitie coulde perceyue and vnderstande that they were beloued they woulde yf they had anye felynge at all of loue requite it with loue but when the soule is loued inasmuche as it maye loue it geueth loue for loue and loueth agayne The Breaker of horsses that doeth vse to ride and to pace theym doeth handle the rough and sturdy colte with all crafte fearcenes that maye be but with it that is more tractable he taketh not so greate payne A sharpe wyfe muste be pleased and mitigated with loue and ruled wyth Maiest ye the more gently thou doest vse shew thy self vnto her that is meke and honest themore beninge and meke thou shalte finde her But she that is noble and of a stoute mynde and stomake the lesse thou doest looke to be honoured the more she wyll honoure thee But yet the wyse husbande shall neuer sette hym selfe so farre in loue that he forgette that he is a man the ruler of the house and of hys wyfe and that he is set as it were in a Station to watche and delygentlye to take heede what is done in hys house and to see who goeth oute and in A shepherd had nede to be industrious and diligent but he much more that hath the orderynge keping of man the whyche is so variable a beast so intractable Yf so be that the husbande haue obtayned that his wyfe doth truly and heartely loue hym there shal nede nother preceptes nor lawes for loue shall teache her moe thinges and more effectuously thē the preceptes of al the Philosophers And for asmuch as the law is made to moderate the affections w tal they shalbe better refrayned by loue the most pusant of all other affections then by any law how elegantly or wisely howe imperiouslye or threatynglye so euer it be made There is made no lawe for him that loueth for to what intent should they make anye lawe when that loue euen na turallye doth moue a man to loue There is no lawe made for the father agaynst y t child but wel for the child agaynste the father for the father doth continuallye loue the childe but the child doth now thē leaue of to loue the father If the wife loue her husband he is to her a father mothcr bre thren true riches all that she wil desire Fortunate and happy is y t house the whiche is knitte with that wherewith the world the heauens and the celestiall spirites are vnited bounde together y t is with charitie And what thing is there in this life that maye be compared with one daye of so blessed so heauenly a life Galenus was maryed with Sulpitia the which amōg all the Matrones of Rome was most chast and beste learned of the which mariage Mar tial doth write in this wise maner O Galene howe pleasannt were those xv yeares that the Lorde did geue thee with Sulpitia thi wife O note it and nowe note it well with a white stone in the which all thy age yeares are cōprised And yf Parca had geuen thee such another day thou wouldeste haue counted thy selfe muche more happye then to haue liued as longe as Pilius Nestor And finally ther shuld be such cōcorde betwene man wife as god hath made betwene heauen earth by the which so great a varietie and multitude of beastes trees is produced ingēdred And therfore it must be wayd cōsidered whether y e woman do loue simply and faithfully for as fire doth kindle fire so doeth loue prouoke loue one flame augmenteth another This thing sayth Seneca hath in it self great ioye reward for what canne be so ioyfull or pleasant as to be so louing vn to thy wife y t therby y u mayst loue thi self y e better If there be any thing amōg these thin ges of fortune that the trusteth vnto or loueth so well that she despyseth and lytle regardeth her husbande because she hath it not or prefer reth her selfe aboue him because she hathe it that thinge must be layd apart contemned as a thing rather accepted estemed by the foolish opinion of man then of it one proper naturall goodnesse Beautie is a frayle gift and a slipperous and more profitable to those that behold it thē to those that haue it nor he can take no great pleasure in it but a litle as it were in a glasse and yet incontinent he doth forgette y t he beheld and sawe and it is to them both a prouocation to euill He that is fayre waxeth proude and he y t doth behold it becometh subiecte vnto filthie loue In the minde the whiche is iudged to be the man do consiste the true liniamētes of fayrenes the which intice and prouoke celestiall loue
him to put on his harnes and to defend thē yea the priestes with their ceremonies were present promised a greate rewarde but he dispised all this Then came Oneus his fa ther a man worthy of great veneration kneled downe before hys obstinate sonne Hys mother also whose angre was nowe chaunged into humble prayer and piticion came vnto hym hys systers and hys moste pleasaūt companions wyth whom he hadde lyued moste iocundly the best part of all hys tyme prayed him not to forsake thē now in this their extreme pe ryi ieoperdie But y t fearce mynde of hys was nothynge moued but denied the helpe that all they with exhortacion prayer and promis desyred In the meane whyle the enemyes entred the cytye and sertynge it a fier in dyuers and manye places murdered and loore vexed the people Hys wyfe Cloopatra beynge soore afrayed came vnto hym sayinge Helpe vs O my husbande for yf thou helpe vs not we are all but deade for oure enemyes haue and posesse all That implacable and fearse heart moued with the only voyce and peryll of hys wyfe armed hym selfe and driuynge hys enemyes out delyuered the citye from extreme daunger and peryll That noble man had wrytten in his heart that precept of nature the whyche he neuer read nor hearde by the whyche he knewe that hys wyfe and he were all one and that all other notwithstandyng they were knytte vnto hym by greate loue and amitie were without hym and that a mans wyfe is so vnited with such a coniunction and knotte bounde vnto her husbande that he doth many thynges for her the whyche he woulde not doe for hym selfe Doeth that noble and moste worthye boron in Homer cry this alone doth Agamemnon Menelaus onlye loue theyr wyues For so doeth euerye honeste man that hathe anye poynte of iudgement as I loued moste heartelye Loryseis althoughe I toke her in warre That king as Salust writeth lyinge nowe a diynge exhorted his chyldren to concorde after thys sorte and maner Who is moore frendlye then one brother to another Or who shalte thou fynde to be thy frende yf thou be enemye to thyne owne Who canne thynke that thou louest hym that perceyueth thou louest not thy wyfe beynge good and honeste And yf thou offended w t certayne her vices doest hate her it shall cause thy frendes to forsake thee to y e whyche it is not vnknowen that no manne lyueth withoute faulte and do trust that throughe vse and tyme they shall waxe tollerable but seynge thou the whiche haste bene so longe acquaynted conuersaunte with thy wyfe canste not beare her what other thynge canne he hope or truste but y t the more strayghtlye and familiarlye thou arte conuersaunt wyth him and the better that thou knowest hym the lesse frendlye thou shalte be vnto hym Canne there be anye vyce I speake of these common vyces so farre frome the nature of any man as the nature and maners of beastes be And yet conuersation doeth so worke that they lyue pleasauntly vnder one roofe and that manne doeth playe and sporte hym selfe with the Lion and the nature and dedes of eche of them doeth so please contente the other y t beinge absent they seeke eche other for familiaritie is of suche vehemencye and force that it coupleth those thynges whyche are of contrarye natures and that because malice is farre of for yf it were mixed the rewith it coulde not clapse nor fasten those thynges whyche are most lyke eche other so great a poyson is malice vnto concorde good agrement Nor thys herbe called mynt doth not as the naturall Philosophers doe saye so muche let mylke to be tourned into chese as the malyce of the hearte doeth lette veneuolence to encrease and growe And in matrimoniall debate and discord the man is more blamed then is the woman because that he beynge the chiefe ruler and heade doeth not as sayeth Uarro purge her of that vice the whyche ingendered that discorde or els pacientlye beare and suffer the same for the blame of al discorde is moste commonlye layed vnto hym that is best because he would not moderate nor let the thynge to come to suche a stryfe and discorde or els because he was not able to doe it In the first there appeareth manifest ma lice in the seconde impacience and weakenes the whyche oughte to be far from him y t is estemed to be moste worthyest appoynted to rule gouerne other And thus he commeth into hatred for asmuch as he hath begiled vs lefte of to do hys duetye and office when it neded not That loue vnto thy wife after thou haste enioyed her for a season doeth waxe feble and colde is a thynge moste mete and cōuenient for those that are kindled with bodely luste and letchery the which are verye beastes and no men hauinge no reason but are drawen to those deades through the motions of their senses the whiche after that the heate be a lytle paste shall cleane chaunge their opinion Also there are other occasions that should cause thys beneuolence and loue in case he be not duller then a stone As that hys wyfe hathe suffered so greate trauell and labour that she hath brought hym for the chyldren the heyres of hys name and substaunce and the vpholders of hys familye and that she hathe forsaken her fathers goodes and ryches to folow hym and to suffer wyth hym bothe good euyll and that she settynge her whole mind nowe vpon hym knoweth nother father nor yet anye of all her kynne What one thynge then shall suffyce to knytte theym in loue yf manye thinges canne not do it who so wil then obey nature humanitie and wisdom shall euery day loue his wife more and moore And the better he knoweth her the more he wyll truste her and to open disclose hys loue shal shew her greater signes tokens of beneuolēce manifestinge y t to be borne and nouryshed throughe the expience of her vertue through hope to be cōtinued kepte that in time to come she maye be like her selfe and as Plato writeth stryue to ouercome her selfe with vertue Thou shalt only loue thy wyfe thus tender ly but frō her as srom a foun tayne y u must extende it vnto her parentes kinsfolke to thende that they maye well know perceiue how greatly their cosyn doeth ayde and helpe them that she in lyke maner maye vnderstande that thy beneuolence loue to her is suche that it red undeth amonge her frendes and parentes and of thys thou shalte receyue no lytle profite at home And yf we wil that her kinsmen be loued for her sake how muche more ought we thē to loue her chil dren the whiche yf thou loue their mother can not be but most dearly beloued moste acceptable vnto thee she in like case shall loue thine yl y u haue anye they seinge this mutual loue betwene
instrumeÌ„ts wouldeste breake vs in peaces cast vs newe agayne and make of vs two but one This is the ende of al our desires for this doth loue study shal obtayne that it desireth yf it may bring y t thynge to passe the whiche at lengthe shal be in that heauenlye loue and charitie when we being spoyled of this fleshe of sinne and renued by Christe shalbe made one thing with God among our selues as Christe dothe teache vs. What other thinge is it y t man must leaue father mother for and cleue vnto his wife but only y t charity ouercometh al loue yea y t also which doth elaspe the fa ther the childe together y t oughte to be mooste greatest beyng a man taught onlye by nature doth saye as Homere writeth that Troy in time to come shuld be destroyed by y t Grekes and that he doth not care nor sorowe so muche for him selfe his father his mother or for his brethren as he soroweth for his dearly beloued wife The stoute manly mind of man hath continually his reward for why the flame pearseth the womans hearte the whiche loueth her husband most feruently And so dyd Andromica loue Hector aboue al other ZenophoÌ„ doth shewe that when Tygraue the king of Armenias sonne hys wife were Cyrus prisoners he promised to redeme her with his owne life And afterwardes wheÌ„ they asked her what she thought of Cyrus she sayd y t she neuer behelde nor sawe him And when her husband sayd what thinge haste thou sene then yf thou neuer didste see him she aunswered what thing shuld I beholde or see but him only y t sayd he wolde redeme me out of seruitute bondage with his owne life so greatly the loue of her husband had inflamed her But what maner of loue should be in matrimony with what other preceptes shoulde it be fashyoned then with those y t whyche the Lorde our God dothe geue by hys Apostle Paule in the Epystle to the Ephesians where he sayeth That manne is the heade of the woman as Christe is the heade of the churche and god the heade of Christ. He propo neth no vile thing nor of erth lye wisdome that dothe corrupt and is foolishnes before God and oftentimes in thys world doth decaye yet doth eleuate and extoll it selfe to the similitude and ymage of the eternall wisedome by the which the almightie god created made the world And that heade of the churche said so seriouslye that he was the saluation of his bodye that he doubted not to giue hym selfe for it The Apostle calleth vpon hys to ensue and folowe thys loue that is that as CHRISTE hathe sprynckled and shedde his bloud to saue his churche so shuldest thou not feare nor that for thine or thy wifes affections but for the helth and salute of her soule to die most stronglye What thinge can make the coragious yf loue make the not the whiche geueth courage audacitie to hartes hares other timerous and fearfull beastes In this worde salute is comprised life helth vertue honestye But as for riches ornamentes delitiousnesse vayne glory voluptuousnes are ta ken for foolishnes He hym self despised al these thinges taught his that they shuld come vnto him yf they lightly regarded them Christ dyd not to enriche his churche w t golde and siluer or that it shoulde be of solace or pleasure but he was crucified to sanctifie his churche with wa ter by y e worde that it myght be glorious withoute anye wrynkle or sporte holye and faulteles and so oughte men to loue their wyues as their owne bodyes The Lord doeth dayly sanctifie the church by hys death that being purged with the mooste purest bloude of her spouse she may be adourned with all vertue and by puttynge awaye olde Adam with all his deedes she maye be clothed wyth Christe her spouse the which was made of God after the similitude and lykenes of the first Adam I say the heauenly not after the ymage of the earthly There appeare outwardly suche wonderful and excelleÌ„t vertues wherof the glorye of the churche doeth aryse that by them they may come to the fountayne of all goodnes that do meruaile at those sprynges and doth honour them And therfore we are commaunded to be in eue ry place a good odour and sauour but namelye vnto the lord And it is the wyl of our maister that oure good workes shoulde be knowen to all men to the intent our heauen lye father of whom we receyued theÌ„ might be glorified The quene did stand vpoÌ„ the right hand of her spouse in a vesture of golde wrought aboute w t diuers colours but yet her glory was not in her apparel nor in those thinges which meÌ„ do behold se but in those y t she seeth in sprite that her spouse doth approue for whose loue she doeth adourne apparel her self who theÌ„ can esteme matrimony to be vile consideringe it is y t ymage of so high and so diuine thinges And therfore y e womaÌ„s life vertue good name fame oughte to be vnto her husband more derer then his own life as christ put his own life to great incredible paines tormeÌ„tes to saue saÌ„ctifie to honor his church Nor y u must not behold how fayre of what kinred how rich or of what healthe she is of nor yet howe greatlye she doeth loue thee for whatsoeuer she be y e thou haste maried thou must none other wyse nor with no lesse affection loue her then Christ loued his churche the whiche refused not to suffer great paynes for the wicked and his enemies drawynge them vnto him as membres vnto the head to furnish and to make vp his churche with al he doeth dayly teache her sustayneth clarifieth mundifieth and with greate pacience gentlenes doeth chasten her and whatsoeuer she be he embraseth her w t great loue although she be vnkind and coldely doth recompence his feruent loue and charite to her wardes She is thy wyfe and ye bothe are nowe but one thing therfore thou oughtest to loue her as thy selfe It is written that Epaminudas enemies appoynted him a certayne vile offâ—ce the whiche he accepted moste beninglye and thankesully sayinge that he woulde so vse it that in tyme to come it shulde be reputed amonge the people a very honest office and so he dyd Could this man in so great a dissention of the citie and amonge so manye enuious personnes and enemies cause a vile office to be had in estimation and canst not thou euen of thy selfe brynge to passe that thou dâ—…pise not thyne owne fleashe yeathy selfe when that â—â—ule doeth saye he that loueth him selfe loueth his wif. Nor ther was neuer man y t hated his owne flesh but doth norish cherish it as the lord doth cherish his church Aristotle folowing the Pithagorians doth define a freÌ„d that
he is the self same thyng with another And god doth saye y t the wife with her husband is al one thing And Cicero to cōfirme kepe amitie geueth this counsel that the inferior shuld ascend the superior descend for so y t things may be brought to equalitie But in matrimonye this nedeth not for it is sufficiente both for y t man the wyfe to perceyue vnderstand that they are parte eche of others bodye And therefore to be fayre or foule ryche or poore noble or ignoble whole or sicke wyse or folyshe is nowe throughe the operation and work of God the which hath made them bothe one common vnto them bothe Nor there shall neuer be true and cōtinual loue except it be stablyshed vpon those thynges that remayne after death For beauty ryches kinred suche other haue their tyme some appoynted by nature some by fortune other humaine chaūces Thei haue also their sacietie in time and place thei are forgotten For we can not at all tymes and seasons remember the Fabians the Cornelians and that we receyued a greate dowrye The affection with the tyme doth waxe feble cold and the plentifulnes and vse of that that a man dyd gredely fyrst desyre doeth cause him to lothe it Al these thinges do diminishe loue certē of thē do vtterly extinguishe it the which if it had bene in the mind in vertue shoulde haue continued for euer For vertue is euer at hand neuer ydle neuer vnprofitable nor voide but alwayes working Nor y t soule of mā by y e death of the bodye doeth not die so that we may beleue that thei whiche be departed doe loue all suche as in thys worlde were deare vnto theym and that they whyche loued the Soules of those whyche bee departed and deliuered from the bodye do loue them not as deade but as they loue their frendes y t which are absent farre frō them And therfore we do see many women that kepe their fayth loue vnto their firste husbandes as did Demotions the Ariopagites doughter of the which S. Hierome doth write agaynste Iouiniane the whiche after that her spouse Leostenes was deade woulde mary with none other saying that she should marry an aduouterer no husband for although he wer departed yet he was aliue vnto her And so sayd that womā of Rome And how sharpely wittelye doth Lucane bring in Cornelia Scipio Metellus doughter and Pompeus last wife taking and esteminge her selfe but as an harlot as touchinge Iulia hys first wife as though the knot and band of matrimonye and loue did yet indure bet wixte the liuing and deade And naturally euery man desireth to be loued and doth searche for the fauour of other men and studieth to kepe to encrease those thinges that cause hym to be in fauour If thy wife do perceaue that thou art rauished and taken with her beau tie and would that thou shuldest loue her she wil do al her diligence to encrease augmente it yf with her communication she will neuer cease pratling yf with her vertue she wil dayly labor howe in all honest vertuous dedes she maye be better By as one of the seuen wise sage men of Grece gaue this one precept rule of loue Loue so sayth By as y t thou mayste hate and hate y t thou mayst loue I can not saye whether this wyse man doth more folowe the figure of wordes then y t truth of the sentence inasmuche as he dothe teache that no man shuld be to other nother faith full frende nor enemye And therefore Cicero doeth saye full truelye that all amitye and frendshyppe shoulde decaye yf a manne shoulde loue so that he maye hate What shoulde he truste then what shuld he beleue or to whome shoulde he open hys mynde or how shuld he loue him tru ly and with al his heart whē he may coniectute and thynk that in time to come he wil be or may by his enemy surelye he will drawe backe and prouide agaynst such thinges as may fortune chaunce And therefore this sentence maye thus more cōuenientlye both for the vse of nature of this life be turned Loue neuer to hate but hate to loue when time shal be Euery man shuld loue his frend simply but speciallye his wyfe And forasmuche as loue other affectes are named of the Philosophers Habitus the whiche are conserued and kept in vs through time operation and labour we muste euen at the beginning geue our diligēce that all iniuries and offences maye be auoyded for as Plutarke doth saye tender softe loue is sone broken Therfore that newe loue coniunction of the mind must be nourished with benigne swete gentle conuersation vntil it be so increased fastened y t no great storme be able to dissolue or breake it And al suspitiō must be at all times but specially at the beginning of matrimony auoyded lest thou firste begin to hate or euer thou beginne to loue And beware thou fayne it not nor conceaue it of no light occasions coniectures for vnto suche thou shouldeste geue no eare although there were great apparence liklyhode Ther is no man so well fashioned and brought vp that can satisfye all men and he that was able to auoyde the faute was not able to auoyde suspition for y e iudgementes of men are free and licentious they do interprete y t they see and heare not after the truth but after their affections and the coniecture that they do fayne reioyce in vnto the whiche some do geue more credite then some Pansanias in platose Simpose doth put two Venus two loues a heauenly and an earthly The earthly is blind abiect vyle fyithye and occupyed aboute vile and filthye thinges neuer lokynge vp to thinges of more worthines But that celestiall and heauēly loue doth see most cleare lye folowyng vertue those thynges whiche are mooste beautifull and moost lyke vnto heauenlye thinges Those husbandes that loue the beau tye or the ryches of their wiues are blynde and subiecte to that earthly loue not perceauinge the reason nor yet the measure therof But thei whiche are true husbandes loue the soule and vertue and haue a iudgemente in loue and beyng inspired wyth the strengthe and spirite of that celestiall loue do loue wyselye for pure and holye loue dothe not vyolentlye compel them as that doeth whyche is earthlye but prudentelye doth guyde and conduct thē gently perswaded to y e place they shuld go vnto The wise husbande doth loue his wyfe feruentlye but yet as the father loueth his sonne y e head the body the soule the fleshe and as Christe dothe loue his churche thus must the husbande the wife loue eche other Nature it felfe dothe teache vs this they lykewise that are learned in diuine letters do tel vs y e same Adam was firste created like vnto
tēperā cie of mind is most aproued most effectuous as whē thou she west thy selse to be moued wyth the greatnesse of the faulte not for any disdaine nor to satisfye and contente thine affections but to amēd her whome thou rebukest Thou muste obserue bothe tyme and place leaste that throughe feruentnes of reprehention thou bespot thy wyfe and cause thy chaunces to be openlye knowen to straungers and other thy familiars whereby in tyme to come thy wyfe shall continuallye hate thee Be not longe angry leaste y t thy desperate wyfe fall headlonge into vice and noughtynes The apostle sayth ye husbandes loue your wyues and be not bitter vnto theym And yf the lorde forbyd vs to be angrye wyth oure brother howe muche y e lesse ought we to be angrye with our wyues the which exceade all brotherlye loue and beneuolence as we haue tolde you before and it is meate it be often times repeted And yf manne be the head of the woman Christe the head of the man he must vse hym selfe vnto the womanne as Christe doeth vse him selfe vnto us that is beniglye and frendelye And the selfe same Apostle doeth call the womanne the bodye of the manne as the churche is the bodye of Christe And not wythstandynge we sustayne and suffer manye incommodities of the bodye yet we hate it not but suffereth it nourysheth it and gouerneth it The husbandes reprehention muste be short for yf it shoulde continue hatred would ensue the whiche woulde coule matrimoniall loue kyndle disdayne and chaunge the swetenesse of theyr conuersation into bytternes Furthermore thou muste alledge the reason and cause that moueth thee to rebuke her that bothe nowe and in tyme to come she may be admonished The force and strengthe of reason hath great power in the mynde of man nor there is nothynge that so cleaueth vnto it nor lesse penetreth the same as thys sentence Thus I wyll and thus I commaunde Thou muste so rebuke her that she maye perceyue it to procede come of good loue to make her better and to be without vice or faulte y t the loue whiche is betwene you maye be the more feruēt and without anye quarel or complaynt at al. Therfore assone as thou hast chastened corrected her and that she other by worde honeste shamefastnes or silence doeth declare that she wyll obey thee geue her then fayre wordes again and a gentle countenaunce as thou waste wonte to doe Ther are in noble women as ther is among men certayne excellente motions of the mynde the whyche to those that be not wyse and doe marcke the thynge but slenderlye seme to come of arrogancye and pryde Nor these ought not vtterly to be kept vnder and cleane extinguished for without theym they canne not approche nor come to that hyghe and memorable ornament that exciteth and moueth man to maruaile and to prayse extolle them Such affections of the mind are apte meete to conserue and kepe the honestye chastitie of women Such noble women shuld not be greuously or sharpely reprehēded or rebuked but drawen frō vice other by y e example or vertue of such women as be gone alreadye or of those that they were aquaynted wyth all or elles by puttynge theym in remembraunce of theyr olde vertue and godlye lyuynge To some woman a becke of her husbande is sufficient to declare y t there is somewhat amisse y t displeaseth him and specially yf she beare her hus bād any reuerēce An honest matrone hath no nede of any greter staffe but of one worde or one sowre coūtenaunce of her husband But where y t this can not helpe but that brawling staues acre must nedes be vsed I geue no pre ceptes nor rules for there they vse violence but yet by mine aduice the husband shal neuer come to y t extremitye for yf thy wife be often rebuked will not bowe but waxeth more stiffe croked yet inasmuche as she kepeth her selfe pure chaste she must be supported and borne withal Nor the bow must not be bro ken with to muche bendynge therof Thus dyd Socrates forbeare his wife Xantippa whom we should folow yf we wer so wvse as to thinke that our pacience by reason of the womā is exercised proued to y e augmentation increase of vertue as Iob Toby did to theyr great profite and to the womans rebuke shame as y t lord whensoeuer it shall be wyl declare iudge aswel of the one as of the other Also he must thinke that she fell vnto him by lotte as his kinred hys countrey hys body hys soule and hys wyt dyd wherwith euery man ought to holde hym contente thynkynge with him selfe that the omnipotente and euerlasting God doeth dispence and order al thynge moste wyselye and moste iustelye Finallye it is meete and conueniente that the authoritye of God whyche coupled theym together shoulde sette them at one yf they were out agre thē And what man durste be so bolde to breake the peace that the king hath made Or who wolde reiect him that by some noble man was cōmaun ded deliuered vnto him yf in thys thyng the reuerence that we haue and beare vnto those whyche are of greate power be of suche force and strengthe or elles loue it selfe howe muche shoulde it be towardes god for who is so mighty or so louinge vnto vs as he him we shuld reue rence loue aboue all other thinges Also he ought to remēber what Paule sayeth y e the wife the husband are al one flesh Of y e body do come continually many incōmodities but yet no manne dothe hate it but to his power doth nourish it yf at any time he be miscontent there with by and by he pleaseth it agayne Such like loue shuld euerye man beare his wise and this after the minde of y e Apostle ¶ Of the proceding and going forwardes in matrimony AFter y e thou haste had experience of thy wife y u oughteste to loue her more tenderlye And nature doth induce a man to that y t which doth make swete familiar and customable thinges be thei neuer so sharpe or greuous for the vse continuall cōpany doth so establishe and cōfirme loue beneuolence y t we vpon that occasion doe loue dogges cattes horses other brute beastes and do mourne sorow their death and absence And what thing is lesse conueniente for a wise a well nourtred man then not to loue his wife whose cō pany he hath so longe so familiarly vsed Meleager Oeneus sōne being both angry w t him selfe all hys sat him downe in his chamber The Curetes whiche made warre agaynst the Calidonians assayled the citie molested them so sort that ther was no hope nother in man nor woman The elders of y t citie came vnto Me leager the only saue garde of al the countrey desiryng
¶ The office and duetie of an husband made by the excellēt Philosopher Lodouicus Viues and translated into Englyshe by Thomas Paynell ¶ Imprinted at London in Pouls Churcheyarde by John Cawood prynter vnto the Quenes hyghnes Cum priuilegio ad imprimendum solum To the ryghte worshipfull Syr Antony Browne Knyght Thomas Paynell whyssheth helth and prosperitye IDo perceaue and by daylye experience do vnderstād most worshipfull Syr how men do erre and are sore deceaued and begi led in the election and choyse of their wiues and howe vncurtously and vngentlye they do vse and intreate them that of equitie and ryghte should be most fauourably and pleasauntly vsed and 〈◊〉 For why what thing should a man loue or intreate more amiably or more swetely then his owne wyfe that is to saye his owne fleshe aud bloude the whiche no man except he be very brutishe and beastly can or ought to mislyke hate or in any maner of wise abhorre But yet how these poore silye wemen are handled and of theyr owne husbandes misordered contemned abhored yea and oftentimes without cause reiected I reporte me vnto the gentle reader of this booke the whiche yf he haue anye 〈◊〉 of wytt or reason shall 〈◊〉 conceaue this thyng to be true and the vndiscrete electiō and choyse of the 〈◊〉 to be the onely and originall sprynge and occasion thereof For in thys our time a time I saye mooste tamentable menne choose not their wiues for their honestie and vertue but for their intisinge beautie not for theyr 〈◊〉 and womanly maners but for theyr possessions and ryches not to 〈◊〉 and brynge forth children to the prayse and lawde of God but for carnall 〈◊〉 and pleasure not to be well and 〈◊〉 occupied at home but ydely and wantonly to spende the tyme abroade not to be godly but wordlye not to be humble and 〈◊〉 but to be prowde and 〈◊〉 not to regard theyr husbandes 〈◊〉 houshold and profyte but theyr owne lustes and solace Wherein is the cause then of theyr wrangelynge and gerre but onelye in the 〈◊〉 election and choyse of theyre wyues and because they doo not when they haue them informe them godly and vertuouslye instructe them for of whome shulde they be instructed and taughte but of theyr owne husbands But per aduēture ye wil say we are not learned nor we haue not redde at any tyme how to choose them and howe to teache them we knowe not In asmuche therfore as I nowe perceaue and knowe that ye can not for lacke of experience and knowledge 〈◊〉 thē that ignoraunce is the roote of suche sinister and 〈◊〉 choyse of youre wyues and the cause of youre so greate debate and stryfe I haue translated this excellent and fyne peace of worke of Mayster Uiues a Philosopher moost famous the which doth teache men howe to choose theyr wyues howe to loue and to intreate them how and where with to instruct them howe to araye and semely to apparell them howe to chasten and correcte them howe in theyr absence and in theyr age to vse them and at theyr departynge vnto god howe to leaue them And on the other syde it teacheth your wyues howe to feare and to honour god howe to loue obey aud serue theyr husbandes how to brynge vp and nourter theyr chyldren howe to haue an eye to theyr husbandes honestie and profyte whether they shoulde be learned or no 〈◊〉 auctors they should reade what company they shoulde haunte and auoyde howe to kepe theyr howses in good reporte and them selues cleane and vndefiled O how excellent then and how profitable a booke is this for the welthe bothe of man and woman moste worthy to be redde of all christians and of those whyche desyre and seke to lyue quietly in matrimony ioyfully in this transitorye vale and dungen of al misery Reade it ther fore at your leasure moste worshypfull syr but yet with iudgement I pray you for as it is a worke moste meete and conuenient for al that maye mary so it is for your maistershyppe moste frutefull considerynge your present estate and condition mooste neadefull For who can be ciricumspect ynoughe in the election and choyse of her whome a man cannot electe by gods lawe tyll death them departe nor yet refuse but for fornication nor at no tyme she beynge alyue mary any other withoute the spot and 〈◊〉 of adulteri Counsell therfore wyth Mayster Uiues howe to choose a wyfe and choose her that feareth god and wyll be obedient and reformable and suche a one as shall geue no occasion of breache or of diuorsement the whiche O lorde is nothynge in these oure dayes regarded for why to haue many wiues at once or to refuse her by some cautell or false interpretation of gods moste holy worde that mystyketh is at this present but as men call it a shifte of descante O heauē O earthe but who am I that goeth aboute to counsell you so prudent a man so well learned so circumspecte in all thynges and that hath a forehande proued the course and trace of matrimony howe godly plesant a thinge it is if the parties be of one accord minde and in Christes true religion of one sayth opinion But let the noble orator Mayster Uiues be al mens guyde and counseyler in this weyghty mater And in such lyke beware of temerarious hastynesse nor beleue not 〈◊〉 yonge and lyght counseller for after light credence commeth heauy repentaunce Thus god preserue your mayster shyppe moste humbly desyrynge the same to accept this my rude translation in good parte and as a token and a pledge of my vnfayned and cordiall loue to you wardes ¶ Of the office and duetie of an husbande IT semed vnto the auctour of nature when he layd y e foundation of the ages and time that was to come that all suche beastes which were sub iecte vnto sicknesses death should at one generation and birth bringe forth but fea we yongelynges to thende their generation might encrease endure for euer that they of a litle beginninge mighte multiplie and arise vnto an in finite multitude and of mortal thinges obtayne as it were an immortalitie But al other beastes do indifferently without any order or lawe obeye nature and geue them selues vnto procreation And this is as it were an vniuersall lawe where vnto we do perceaue and see that al maner of beastes do willingly obeye although there be amōg these that liue in societie and obserue the holines of matrimony so vndefiledly y t they may well instruct and teache many thousandes of men the chastitie the charitie y e fayth the maner and the qualitie of matrimony and in this number are swannes turtledoues crowes and doues But man beynge borne to lyue in company and in the communion of lyfe was bounde by the auctoure of nature wyth more exact and streyghter lawes of matrimonye Nor he would not that man vntemperately shoulde medle
thee the more bitterly hate thee howe muche her first husband then thou dyd more commodiously and gently vse her But she y t shal come laden to the w t childrē shal rob thee gather to enriche her owne withall She wyll not loue thy chyldren nor yet equallye those which are common betwene you but shal haue compassion vpō the fatherles being destitute of al fatherlye helpe and com forte In her that was corrupte men must consider the lyfe that is paste for of these ther are two periculous kindes for thou shalte heardlye perswade her that was common or her that hathe haunted the companye of greate men or her the whiche they haue loued to be continente for it would be heard for her that was wonte and accustomed to be a maistres ouer great men to serue him that is so farre vnder those which wer her seruātes And how soeuer she shal find the she wil not beleue that al other wold haue ben as thou art but shal lament that so vnluckedly she came was maried vnto the. I wold not counsel y t to mary her w t whome thou hast bene in amors withal whom thou flatterdest whome thou didst serue whom thou calledst thy hart thy life thy maistres thy light thy eyes w t other suche wordes as foolishe loue doth perswade vsinge impietie agaynst god which is y t ende of al desire goodnes Thys submission is shoulde be the cause y t she doth not regard y t but disdayneth to serue thee whose ladye she was as she estemed whō she foūd more obedient vnto her euen with y t peril daunger of life thē a ny other slaue y t was bought for monie Thus it appeareth it is not conuenient y e the seruaunt should rule y e maistres for after y t loue hatred reuerence contempt feare hath once occupied the mind of mā they leaue certayne cōtinuall markes the which y e Grekes call Hexis the Latins Habitus Great noble men do alwayes honour their pedagoges maisters that for the reuēce they bare thē of youth do feare them notwithstan ding they be their subiectes haue the aucthoritie power in their hand bothe of life and deathe And the prouerbe doth saye that whoso marieth for loue dothe liue in sorow I wold y t the flame whiche was kindled did burne before they were married after they were married waxed cold agayne might be renued perpetual pure liuelye Thou seeste nowe howe great prudency wisdome is necessary to discerne iudge these thinges and how necessary it is to counsel with him whose motions of the minde are quiete that they begile thee not Let no man trust to obtayne a wife y t shal haue no incommoditie nor faute but yet the fewer y t she hath shall be in stede place of her mani fold great vertues But he y t is wise wil learne take cō sel by such thinges as be present And forasmuch as those thinges which be meane are almost infinite there cā be no vniuersall forme nor rule genen of them therfore wisdō is present at hand the which is not geuen but with preceptes ayded holpen to admonish men of y e same I haue as for an example writtē the thinges matters aforesaid In the deliberation of matrimony this must be inuiolably obserued y t we folow not the iudgement of oure owne senses nor eyes the whiche are sone rauished and deceaued with beautie nor of the eares the which take pleasure in elo quence nor of the motions of the mynde wherewith men are ledde other to kinred or els to moneye or riches the whiche all throughe their instabilitye aboundaunce or sacietye do brynge wyth them swyfte sodaine repentance And therefore al thinges are to be reuoked called to that supreme and exact iudgemēt of the mind Thou shalt take hede that on thy part the wo man nother in body nor in sub stāce be not deceaued for thou shalt neuer vse her cōinodiously and as thou wouldest thy selfe whome thou fraudulent ly deceytfully diddest intice wind vnto thee for natural ly we hate him as an enemy y t doth begile vs nor nothynge doth displease a manne more then to lacke the thinge he loked for It were better to disclose vnto her thy vices infirmities the mediocrity and meanes of thy goodes substance with the perill of y e losse of her then to obtayne her w t fraude sure discord Sergius Galba his father y t was Empe rour playde as it is written the parte of a wise of an honest man for when Liuia Occel la that beautifull riche woman was in loue with him he put of his clothes secretlye did shew her that he was bro ken backte the which simple gene rositie did so contente please her that she regarded not the blemishe of his bodye but loued and honoured him more thē euer she did before Many men are wont to saye y t they will rule their wiues whatsoeuer they be or howsoeuer they came by thē and that it is in the hande and power of the husband what and of what conditions she shall be Certes a greate parte of this doth rest lye in the husband so that he as he oughte to do do vnderstand that ma trimonye is the supreme and most excellent part of all amitie and that it farre differreth from tiranny the which doth compell men to obeye Truly it compelleth the bodye but not the will in the whiche all loue and amitie do the onelye consist the which yf it be drawen dothe resiste and bowe lyke a palme tree as naturall Philosophers do wryte to the contrarye parte Nor thou shalte not beleue that there canne be anye maryage or concorde where they agree not in wyil and minde the whyche twoo are the beginning seate of all amitie frendship And they that do auaunce thinke thē selues able to rule their wiues by that time they haue proceded and gone a litle further they shall feele perceaue thē selues begiled find y t thyng to be most hard intractable the whiche to be done they estemed most light and easye Some there be y t through euyll and roughe handelynge and in threatenynge of their wiues haue them not as wiues but as seruauntes And yet surelye they are but very fooles that iudge matri mony to be a dominion And such as woulde be feared do afterwardes lamente complayne that they find no loue in them whose loue amite through their owne importu nitie thei turned into hatred And at y e beginnynge glorifiing craking thus cruelly to be their wiues maisters thei purchase vnto them selues a most miserable alamentble life in time to come beinge nowe y t all loue pleasure is caste a side enuironed with feare suspition hatred so row Truly yf a man as nature
familiar custome of their fathers without any paine or laboure But nowe a dayes they call her eloquente that with long vayne confabulation can intertayne one and what shuld a man thinke that she beinge vnlearned shoulde talke with a yonge man litle wiser then her selfe but that that is eyther folish or filthy And this they call the gentill intertaynement of the court that is to say of y t scole where they learne other like artes of their mayster the deuill See no we where vnto y e maners and customes of men be come and how all thinges do turne for nowe it is estemed as vile that a woman shulde holde her peace that is that her most fayrest vertue shuld seeme to be deforme and fylthye Howe greate laboure shal we coniecture that Sathan tooke to perswade man to beleue this But thoushalt number scilence among other thy wiues vertues y t whiche is a great ornament of y t hole feminine sexe And when she sp eaketh let her coÌ„municatioÌ„ be simple not affectate nor ornate for y t declareth the vanitie of y t mind And al suche as were praysed of oure elders for their eloqueÌ„ce were most extolled lauded forasmuch as they kept the language of their forefathers sincere and cleane as Cicero declareth in his boke of an Orator And Iuuenal euen crabbedly and not withoute a cause doeth saye Lette not thy wife be ouermuch eloquent nor full of her shorte and quycke argumentes nor haue the knowledge of al histories nor vnderstand manye thinges whiche are written she pleaseth not me that geueth her selfe to poetry and obseruing the arte maner of the olde eloquence doth study to speake facundiously This holye and sincere institution shall increase thorough the good example of y e husbaÌ„d the which to informe and fashion the womans life and his family withall is of no lesse valure and force then the example of a prince to informe the publique maners customes of a citye for euerye manne is a kynge in his owne house and therefore as it besemeth a kyng to excell the common people in iudgemente and in example of lyfe and in the execution performaunce of the thynge that he coÌ„mauÌ„deth so he that doth marrye muste east of all childishnes remember the saying of the Poet This age requireth another manner of life other maners and so to take vnto him selfe the counsel and mind of him y t is aged to mayntayne the duetie and office of an husbande declarynge a good life not in wordes preceptes onely but also in life and dede The which two thinges to rule maÌ„ withal are very necessarye that is wisdome and example and that thou thy selfe fulfyll the thynge that thou cammaundest to be done The life whether it he good or euyll dothe not onelye as Fabius sayeth perswade but also constraine and inforce We doe see how myghtye that thys exhortation is in warre and in battell O my souldiers doe that ye shall see me doe the which contempte of deathe in the captayne doeth so creepe thorowe the whole hooste that there is not one be he neuer so seeble and weake hearted that doeth esteme his lyfe for the which he perceyueth that hys captayne careth so lytle for Thus dyd Christe wyth hys Apostles and Martyrs draw the world vnto y e faith for as thei liued so thei spake and as they spake so they lyued Nowe shall thy wyfe obeye thee commaundynge her to be sober temperate yf she see thee distempered and likewyse of continence chastitie yf thou be an aduou terer and a folower of other mens wyues For Claudian doeth say yf thou commaund any thynge to be done looke thou be the first that shall doe it and so shall other obey thy law commaundement nor shal not â—eny to do the thyng that they se him do that commaunded it Furthermore he muste rehearse vnto his wife the good examples of other women for that shall seeme and apeare more easye to be done that hathe bene done alreadye And yf the mind be couragious and noble it can not be well expreste no nor scantlye beleued howe it shall be prouoked and styrred vp wyth the laude and prayse of other Themistocles was wonte to saye that Mylciades tryumphes dyd excite and quycken hym Nor thou shalt not onely rehearse vnto her olde and aunciente names as Sara Rebecca Penelope Androinacha Lu cretia Colebolina Hipparchia Portia Sulpitia Cornelia and of our sayntes as Agnes Catherine Margaret Barbara Monica Apolonia but also those that more fresher as Catherin quene of englaÌ„d Clara Ceruerta the wife of Uallearus and Blanca Maroa albet I doe feare to be reproued that I doe thus commende my mother geuynge my selfe to muche to loue and pitie the which trulye doeth take muche place in me but yet the trueth muche more There can not lacke in euerye nacion and citye ho nest and deuonte Matrones by whose examples thei may be styrred and prouoked but yet the familier examples as of the mother the â—eldame the aunt the sister the cosyn or of some other kinswoman or frende shoulde be of more force and value For why suche examples as we do fee doe muche moore moue vs and better we folowe theym then anye other And in like maner the actes and deedes of euyll and wycked women doe teache vs what we shuld flee and auoyde beynge certayne that suche thynges can not be hydden and that the rewarde ther of is at hande at leaste wyse the publyke ignominie and shame of all the cytye that better it were to dye then to lyue so Familier communication doeth bothe instructe them and also confirme theyr maners but yet let it be symple as wyth her that is thy moste frende and mooste familier not vsynge her in thy wordes more reue rentlye then is conueniente nor sufferynge her to honour thee more then it beseemeth the whiche as at some tymes they doe increace reuerence so thei do diminish loue cha ritie y t which in matrimonye should be most true seruent And as concernyng venerati on reuerence thei cause the mind rather to dissemble theÌ„ to be symple and open as it ought to be No man geueth faythful honour or reuerence to him that is arrogant and vayne or that of right doeth loke to haue it for honor may wel be drawen but not extor ted Call thy wyse by a name that pretendeth a loue that maye styr her to loue thee as doughter or syster as Paule dyd cal hys And she shall call thee by some name of honour as Sara called Abraham lorde Ye muste often tymes coÌ„mon together of vertue of maners of y t errour of the coÌ„mon people of the vse of thinges of the conuersation gouerning of the house houshold of the artes occupations y t ye must get your liuyng with al of the holy institution and education of your children