Antiquities of these times or places examine the Original if thou canst or consult the opinions and explication of those Authors who are most learned and especially of such as are most esteemed for integrity and least obnoxious to self-interest or the service of any party yet so consider what is said by them as that thou mayest not be swayed by their Authority or popular estimation but ever use thy own understanding and be judge for thy self of what thou readest making always Truth and nothing else the end of thy search that as near as thou canst nothing may be entertain'd by thee but what is consonant thereunto and that by thus using thy parts thou mayest be at all times able to give an account to others of what thou believest as therewith to satisfie thy self Lastly Let me enjoyn thee never to speak slightly or irreverently of the Scriptures for 't is the way that leads to the doubting of God and his Providence The most undeniable instances and demonstrations of both we have from thence For though natural Religion afford us great demonstrations of the reality and necessity of a Divine Being and the continuance of the World in its just order implies that the same Transcendent Being takes cares in the regulation and preservation of what he has made yet would these natural impressions daily fade and impair in us were they not frequently reviv'd by the instructions of good men and the frequent hearing and perusal of the Holy Scriptures And let it be ever spoken to the Honour of that Divine Book that all the good documents therein contained are but lively expressions of what God first wrote with his own finger in the Table of our hearts All these reluctancies and shudderings of Conscience these drawings back and internal whispers against proceeding in any evil action which the better we are the more urgent we find are but Conservators of the first Copy and original of the Laws by which God Almighty intended to bound Mankind and which he after exemplified in the Life of Christ and in the Rules which occasionally flow'd from him and his followers The best Municipal Laws that any Countrey or any Order of men have contriv'd for the happiness of mans Life and preservation of the publick Peace are abundantly short of what is in this Book contained and wherein any Laws of men are opposite to the Rules of Scripture there mayest thou safely conclude that they are not good or for a good end established but in order to some unworthy and indirect Interest which intimately examine and thoâ— shalt find it in equal opposition to the Life and Doctrines of our blessed Jesus Keep therefore my Son close to the instructions of this Heavenly Book have it always in just respect and reverence prefer it before all the Writings in the World examine all laws practices and designs of men by it Give no ear to those loose Spirits who speak irreverently and contemptuously of it and though thy whole Library burn think not thy self unfurnish'd as long as thou retainest or canst purchase the Bible Thus my dear Son have I taken some pains to perswade thee to give all reverence willing submission acknowledgement and adoration to Almighty God and prompted thee thereunto from the contemplation of his works in the Creation and Conservation of the World and the direction of the two great and agreeable Lights that of Conscience and this of the Scriptures I shall now proceed to the more particular actions of thy Life For though the Light of Nature and Scripture be a rule adaequate to whatsoever may fall out in thy Life and which if thou beest true to thy self will furnish thee with the knowledge of what is best in every occurrence yet a Fathers Love cannot rest here but must proceed to instructions more particular referring especially to what I conceive may most probably fall out either too hard for thy opposition as wherein I observe men commonly to fail or of such a nature as that men pass it over too regardlesly and supinely and yet in such things as are of great moment and high concernment to the felicity or infelicity of Humane Life In doing whereof I would have thee favour me so far as not to look for any exact method I shall not be sollicitous about it but set down things as they come in my mind or occasion brings them in In defect of a Method I may perhaps make thee a Table referring to the particulars or if I do not it will be no time lost to make one for thy self Of the Fear of God 1. Thou art often advis'd in Scripture to fear God and it is said to be the Beginning of Wisdome This is most excellent Counsel for he that fears God avoids whatsoever is Evil and consequently ever makes the best choice which is the manifestation of Wisdome Yet I would have thee understand that this Fear ought to be inseparable from Love 'T is not such a fear as we have of a Tyrant whose yoak we would ever shake off if we knew how but such a fear as a good Child has of a very loving Father and is indeed no other but Love varied in the expression He that loves God and follows the Dictates of that Love will do nothing displeasing to him And what can Fear do more Were Love in perfection there would be no Fear Fear is therefore from the imperfection of Love Hence St. John saith 1 Ep. c. 4. v. 18. There is no Fear in Love but perfect Love casteth out Fear because Fear hath torment or pain He that Feareth is not made perfect in Love Consider likewise that Fear is the fruit of Self-Love which prompts us to avoid the sin only to escape the punishment not because we detest sin or because 't is contrary to Gods command but that we may not endure the penalties which are the wages of it Such a Fear as this the Devils themselves have it is therefore not to be the motive against Sinning to the Children of God He that refrains from sin upon this account only loses not the love and desire to sin and does therefore still sin in his Heart He would not continue to be innocent if he could contract guilt without punishment God will never be displeas'd with obedience as it is an effect of Love and questionless loves them best who so obey him Fear was put in because of the perversion of our Natures and because we ceast to be good from the admiration of Gods Excellency and Love to Goodness it was therefore expedient that we should know that there were punishments which would certainly follow those who broke his commands and would not be restrain'd by Love In the mean time take notice my Son that God has most delight in uncompell'd Goodness the sweet bloomings and productions of Love and therefore would have all fear resolve into this where vertue is delight and goodness the pleasure of the Soul where Obedience has
no eye to Punishment but flows from the heart as the Suns rayes do from its own fountain of Light Do not the best Parents esteem those children most who love them truest and whose obedience is an effect of that Love and we reckon it somewhat a sign of a bad disposition to be good only from fear of the Rod Strive therefore my Son as the most acceptable sacrifice to God ever and truly to love him to love his Commands as pleasant in themselves and therefore chosen by God to be his Commands For be assured that God has commanded nothing but what is good for them to whom he gives it and delightful too were it not for reluctancies begotten in us either by the perversion of nature or the impediments which the depraved world put upon it Of Reading Meditating and going to Church Though Reading of good Books and going to Church frequent discourses with wise and good men Meditation with thy self be very good means of acquiring and improving thy knowledge yet these things thou must not make thy end but the means rather for the better accomplishment of the end The main end for which thou takest pains in all these particulars is to lead an honest and good life well pleasing to God just and regardful to thy Neighbour and thy self Never therefore go to Church meerly for shew nor take upon thee the semblance of that which men call Religion for thy profit It will denote thee a Hypocrite the worst and most contemptible sort of men odious to God to those who are good and in time to thy self It debases Religion and makes it serve the vilest purposes Whatever the professions of men are and how great soever their shews of Sanctity from the constancy of going to Church and the frequency of private exercise yet must not these things denote them true Christians unless the goodness of their lives not only in their avoiding of the most noted vices as Whoredome Drunkenness Profaness c. but also in forbearing and detesting the less noted and more injurious crimes of oppression extortion covetousness hard and unjust dealing high mindedness and overweening of themselves severe censuring of others hard-heartedness want of Charity and natural affection which are crimes I say more destructive to mankind and in my opinion not in the least to excuse the other much more hateful to God Whatsoever therefore thou takest up of publick or private duty as it is call'd exercise it with a sincere mind but let thy acquisition of Knowledge be always in order to the bettering thy life not for vain-glory or to be esteemed better than thy Neighbour If thy business be the Practice of Physick the exercise of Trade or whatever employment else let me forewarn thee that thou take not up any mode of Religion in order to the improvement of thy employment but let that depend wholly on thy painful endeavours to acquire a valuable ability in thy profession and in a just and conscientious discharge of the same Of Praying to God Besides hearing concerning which the former paragraph is chiefly meant there are two other particulars in which our applications to God Almighty chiefly consist And they are Praising of God and Praying to God concerning each of which I shall advise thee And first of Praying to God Conceive that Prayer ought to be a serious and premeditated application to his Divine Majesty for the obtaining of something that we want or the continuance of what we enjoy or the averting some evil we have deserved Here we are well to consider who it is to whom we apply our selves that the greatest King nay were there an Universal Monarch of this Earthly Globe to whom all Kings bow'd he were as nothing not so much in dignity as a Mote in the Sun compared to the Majesty of Heaven to whom notwithstanding men every day make hasty irreverent and trivial applications O my Son this is a matter of mighty weight And therefore whensoever thou makest thy addresses to God do it with the due consideration of the following Particulars 1. Let thy Prayer be for what thou wantest or for the continuance of what thou hast just cause to fear he will take from thee or averting of some deserved punishment 2. Let it not be hastily or unadvisedly exprest nor mixt with numerous and impertinent particulars but proportioned to the quality and extent of thy want in which the need it self must guide thee 3. Avoid Tautologies and vain Repetitions which imply affectation in Prayer and disrespect to him thou addressest to The Primitive Christians were longer in fixing their hearts in a fit posture for Prayer than in Prayer it self and it is very considerable that we find among them no Prayers of length but only private ejaculations and the short form that our Saviour himself hath set us 4. Take heed that thou never makest Prayer an Opus operatum a work done ending in it self a form of words spoken like a Parrot without premeditation and the concurrence of the mind but from the impulse and urgency of thy wants 5. Pray not with doubting but have those just and becoming thoughts of God that since he has permitted thee to pray he will certainly grant thy requests if thou prayest as thou oughtest that is not in formality not out of course and custome not to be seen of men but because thou art the submissive Son of a gracious Father alwayes ready to hear and infinitely able to accomplish whatsoever his obedient Children shall request of him if therefore we miss of what we desire we must impute it not to Gods unwillingness to hear but to some great defect in our selves for want whereof our Prayers justly become ineffectual 6. Consider likewise that Prayer seems to be rather a priviledge than a duty a gracious concession to us that when we are in straits and difficulties in terrors and disquiets of mind or bodily wants or afflictions we have the freedom allowed us yea and a fatherly invitation to make our applications to God for relief 'T is well pleasing indeed to God that those who are good and lead their lives in a careful obedience to his Laws do make their applications to his Majesty in their distresses but the profit redounds to our selves and 't is then God's special time to assist his Children when they can find no other way of relief 7. Lastly let the ground of thy hopes in obtaining thy desires be chiefly the goodness and mercy of God and his promise to hear those who pray in Faith and as they ought But withal think not that thy honest and good life is not necessary for obtaining thy Suit A debauched and lewd Son has little encouragement to expect that his Father should give him what he desires whilst he continues in the course of his lewdness And though God be full of mercy taking delight in the exercise thereof yet is it to the good and penitent not to the obstinate and contemptuous
artifice of words In matters dubious and opinionative though I have thought fit to declare my judgment and acquaint you with the reasons and grounds that have inclined me yet I would not have you therefore give up your assents thereunto for Paternal Authority does not extend so far but for what is plain and agreeable to the rules of Vertue and Gods Sacred Word and therefore universally acknowledged here you are bound up and obliged in your lives to a strict observation thereof I have not writ it methodically with dependance of one Chapter upon another nor does the nature of the Subjects bear it Besides my business in the world has been much especially in my own profession I have writ it by piece-meal and as the several subjects came into my mind and therefore 't is no wonder they they have no dependence one upon another They may each be separately considered as need shall require and the Table direct Methods are for what is Scholastical written for Sale and Fame neither of which are by me intended Besides I never purpose it shall go abroad and therefore the homeliness of the dress attended with truth's plainness will not misbecome it I design it also as well for my Daughters as my Sons though some things therein are peculiar to men yet much of it is of equal concernment to the Female Sex who also may have male Children and as they are mine I allow them an equal title to it Women of middling quality esteem things worthy rather more than men are generally less vitious better guarded with modesty have less temptations and a great love to Vertue and Goodness give an easier assent to what is just unless biassed by their Husbands interest or prevailing power And therefore I intend this Book as much for them as my Sons not doubting but that they will and that more frequently peruse it more deliberately and seriously weigh the contents of it because their business will not be so much nor their diversions so frequent as those of my Sons I bestow it therefore with a like alacrity and expectation upon them and expect at least answerable fruits as from my male Children Lastly let no imputation remain upon me if I have in the progress of this Book mentioned the same things upon several occasions more than once for being I was it may be two or three years in writing it it is no wonder if my memory did not retain the sense of the whole Tautologies in this case are not so disallowable the intention being good and the matter necessary May it have an influence upon your minds suitable to the affectionate desires of my heart that you may be no dishonour to your Country nor no blemish to your Family That however others demean themselves it may be truly said that you all and your Families will serve the Lord in truth and sincerity of heart in all Godliness and Honesty and so my blessing be upon you all and the blessing of him who is the Author of all Beings the Eternal God Thus I am dear Children Your Affectionate Father HUMPHREY BROOKE Of Mans happiness and wherein it consists THE two great Ends that men are to aim at in this World are First to live happily here and Secondly to obtain the utmost assurance that man can attain to of being in the number of the blessed hereafter Both these are no otherwise to be had but by the acquisition of Wisdom and Goodness Now the beginning or foundation of true Wisdom is the fear of God so the Wise man has exprest it in the Counsel to his Son Proverbs 1. v. 7. The Fear of the Lord is the beginning of Wisdom but Fools hate knowledg and instruction Fools indeed for what greater argument of folly can there be than to contemn the means of Happiness or to seek it in those wayes where it is not to be found A rich man may be miserable and so may they be who are dignified with Titles A Politick worldly man creates trouble and perplexity to himself and others and in all his grandeur if he deviates from the paths of Justice Wisdom and goodness is fur-rounded with difficulties eaten up with cares condemned by himself and the nearer he comes to his journeys end the greater are his horrours from the review of his vain designments the apprehension of Death and his fears of what must ensue after it Having therefore a mean esteem of these gaudy nothings or splendid Vanities my first advice to you my Son is to have a right apprehension of God so far as he has been pleased to manifest himself which he hath fully done both as to the excellency and perfection of his Being the glorious explications of his Wisdom and singular emanations of his Goodness He is the only God there is none besides him all things in this world yea the World it self the Heavens and the Earth are the workmanship of his hands their being and duration are at his pleasure with a word he made them and with a word when he sees it in his wisdem fit he can destroy them Just ground there is therefore for our fear of him and that our chiefest love should be fixt upon him in comparison to whom there is nothing valuable how dear soever in our esteem nor can we place any hopes of stedfast happiness but in our exact obedience to his will and commands You are therefore my Son to plant the fear and love of him in your heart and in all the actions and undertakings of your life you are well to consider that they bear a strict conformity to his will No other design aim or interest is to bear sway with you or hold any proportion in your thoughts This Counsel if you well observe which with the true affection of a Father I lay before you your life will be full of delight the World you pass through will be as a garden of sweet-smelling flowers beyond that of Paradise all afflictions will be easy death it self lovely without sting without affrightment a passage from lesser bliss to greater To your Fathers House the Mansions of the blessed And therefore my dear Son let it have preference in your mind let no allurements make you decline it 't will be a guide to your feet and a lanthorn to the dark paths of your difficult journey through this Earthly Pilgrimage Remember he gives you this Counsel who speaks from great experience and greater affection 't is the fruit of all my labors and the result of the best observations your affectionate Father hath made in the whole course and progress of his life Esteem not this therefore as slight and customary advice spoken in course or for formality it is my Son what I am most serious in and what I prefer before all other Rules or directions I shall hereafter give or can with my utmost intention of doing thee good be insisted upon And therefore what ever esteem you have of the rest be
hastily Chew your meat well and prepare it for the stomach Cheerfully ingage not at meals in over serious discourses Civilly strive not for the best but offer it to others and keep it not but upon importunity This gains great respect and Creates kindness Have a care of that which you love of too great variety and a feast Drunkenness is a foolish vice and has nothing to commend it but its hoity toity insensibility if that may be accounted commendations Drinking is for thirst or pleasure the first is best performed by the natural drink Spring-water or a middle sort of Beer The other is lost after the second draught But if there were a pleasure in drunkenness which yet the Friar appointed for a punishment the numerous mischiefs it creates does abundantly more than countervail it I will not enumerate them look about you with a sober eye and you may daily and every where find them Let this suffice that a drunkard loses much time and is at great expence to make his body sickly his reputation crazy to diminish his estate and shorten his life This is to be considered before the habit is gained for that once gotten the vice is sufficiently punished by it self for a Drunkard ends in a Sot and though he sees and hates his own folly he cannot leave it Cloth your self answerable to your condition decently and cleanly but never gawdily Let not Cloathing be a burthen either to your body or estate but a defence against the cold and injury of the air Alter as the weather does and be before hand against a surprize Be not singular in your habit nor too nice a follower of the fashion Regard ease and conveniency in the first place and handsomeness in the Second No more need be said to this Particular Of Chastity For the cloathing of the mind I have taken care in what has been before written I shall only mention one vertue more which I have reserved to the last not as of least concernment but that it may make the greatest impression that is of Chastity you are to keep your body clean and wholesome free from all pollution either by unseemly actions upon your self or defilement from Women I injoyn you therefore to be strict to your self in these particulars and exactly continent This will render you healthful active and vigorous preserve your colour and strength make you desirable for a husband able to get Children sound and healthful and so preserve posterity Whereas if you should render your self a prey to Harlots who know not what love is being swayed by lust or gain your body will be enervated your strength decayed your health lost your colour and complexion faded and your self rendred an unfit companion for a good and vertuous Woman by joyning with whom in that state of pollution you will indanger the conveying of Diseases to her and your posterity and so render your and their lives perpetually miserable Take notice that of all Diseases the Pox is the worst both in respect of the ignominy that attends it as also of the multiplicity of grievous maladies noisome painful and hardly if at all perfectly curable that are inseparable from it Nor let it in the least encourage you that some have been seemingly cured of it for the contrary is most certain that whoever has in any reasonable degree been defiled with it they have never recovered a perfect no not their former state of health But are upon changes of weather or any adventitious sicknesses exposed to returns of pains And those sicknesses likewise thereby become more difficultly cured This I speak of those who seem to have been most perfectly curable Whereas in the cure great hazards are run in the methods that are used generally consisting in the use of Mercurial Medecines little errors committed in the use thereof proving often of worse consequence than the disease it self My experience has met with many instances of this kind Against all this there is no sure preservative but Chastity The remedy that Bocalines Mountebank Zeccha used to prevent the getting that foul Disease was very remarkable he advised that when desire had got the victory of reason and was hurrying a man to the use of a Woman of sale that he should only give so much respite to the impulfe of his passion as to look upon a Picture which he was alwayes as a preservative to carry in his pocket of a Gentleman otherwise handsome but without a Nose not doubting but the sight of that deformity and the consideration that he was now about that which might render him such another unsightly object would make him pause and so dispirit him as to render him unfit for that dangerous incounter For what security can there be from a Woman that has prostituted her body to all comers and who takes delight to communicate that disease to one Man they have received from another Be assured there is not in the world so vile a thing as a Whore so foul so false so treacherous And though men may flatter themselves that they can oblige them by great gifts to themselves only they meanly suffer themselves to be deceived for there are but two things that make a whorish Woman Lust or Gain be it either of them or both they are motives to her self and have no respect to you but to make a prey of you If Zecchas Picture be hard to get I will tell you of one more easily acquirable and no less effectual That is to carry about you two of Solomon's Verses which read over before you go about the engagement One is in the 6. of Proverbs the 16. By means of a Whorish Woman a man is brought to a piece of Bread And the Adulteress will hunt for the pretious life The other is in the 7. Chap. v. the 26. She hath cast down many wounded yea many strong men have been slain by her Her house is the way to hell going down to the Chambers of Death What can be more Here 's Poverty and in that sadness dejection of Spirit contempt Yea here is destruction death and Hell it self And all for what A pleasure mixt with doubts and fears A pleasure if it may therefore so be called short and faint inferiour to that of Beasts and which only has a true value from the hopes of Posterity A Prostitute regards particularly her own interest and is to get from you all she can She is from her followers to provide for herself and lay up for sickness and in them hastily approaching Age When you are suckt dry and your mony is spent you are to expect the Prodigals fate to be turned out of doors and perhaps to end your dayes in a loathsome some Prison she cared not for you in your prosperity but for her ends which being served she scorns and hates the sight of you being conscious that your misery was caused by her she avoids so upbraiding an object But oh oh the contrary the pleasures of a
in what may be brought into use and is of some commodity or at least innocently pleasurable which I would have to be the rule of your Choice in selecting only such parts of those Sciences as may serve you in some of your occasions or create an inoffensive pleasure to your self and Family of this kind is Musick of the other Arithmetick which well to understand qualifies a man and becomes serviceable to him in almost all businesses that occur in his life 3. The Third particular in which at leisure hours you may divert your self is the reading of History and gaining knowledg in the Laws of your Country You will find these of very great pleasure and use In the reading History let me advise you to these Cautions 1. To decline those which are trivial foolish and full of falsities Imprinting in the mind chimerical notions of things that never were stories of Gyants Fairies Ghosts and Goblins Walking Spirits and many such like appearances which though meerly chimerical having no being but in the minds of those who fansie them have yet an ill effect upon youthful apprehensions Creating frightful and unhealthy Dreams making them fear the dark and being alone to the great affright and debasing of their Spirits which should by truth and realites be kept vigorous and hearty 2. Contemn the Reading of Romances unless some very few which are innocent vertuous and of good design or which are purely Moral and under proper names commend the Vertues truth and Religion to the practice of mankind Such in particular is Dr. Ingelos Bentivolio Vrania a Discourse not only excellently well written for accomplishment of those good ends he designed which I now mentioned But purposely also to substitute a useful discourse written in a Romantick way in the place of what are more common than Bibles in many families and Create in young Men and Maidens false and corrupt notions of Government Love and Valour the constant and almost only subject of those Idle Pens For as to Government it usually supposes that all mankind is made for Princes it justifies their Wars raised upon private animosities or for enlarging of Dominions it makes them usually absolute unbounded by Law and through the bewitching pleasure the youthful take in reading those Books they suck insensibly those false opinions which complying with the common designs of Governours are not without much difficulty afterwards eradicated making them in the mean time easily stoop to a willing slavery Then as to valour it considers not the true ends thereof which only can render it justifiable Such are defence of our Countrey our Laws just Government common safety or particular lawlesly invaded Whereas the Idol they set up in their Romances has no regard to these things but is made to do things beyond humane belief and for ends as barbarous as his Valour is prodigious This also has no small influence upon the youthful that read them in raising their passions upon every trivial occasion and from a similitude they make of themselves with the Romantick stripling despise other people as vulgar the Herd Rabble Multitude who yet are in God Almighties esteem of equal rank with themselves many of whom also have parts and vertues more eminent than themselves the vices and debaucheries also of the rest owe themselves for the most part to the countenance and ill example of the great ones Then as to Love the very writers themselves are ignorant of what is truly such grounded upon Vertue and terminated in the sweet effects of Conjugal amities the production and education of Children and the Government of a Family which is the foundation of the Worlds continuance and for the preservation of which God implanted that noble passion in the minds of Men and Women this kind of love these Romantick vapours are ignorant of crying up in place thereof an idle phantastical useless impracticable affection not without frequent mixtures of lustful amours tending to the increase and nourishment of vain or evil concupiscence filling the mind with busy and phantastical apparitions and leaving them muddy melancholy and useless as to what is truly good and substantial That notice of Dr. Ingelo speaking of these Romances is very true and worth your observation That looked upon with a judicious eye they will appear to be full of the grossest indecorums of invention as odious representations of Divinity unnatural descriptions of human life improper and prophane allusions to Sacred things frequent and palpable contradictions sottish stories and in short all the absurdities of wild imagination Such also is the greatest part of Poetry both Ancient and Modern and therefore my Son be advised and advise your Children against not only so great loss of time as is required in reading these Fables but in avoiding the having not only your understandings misinformed by the false representations therein but your minds also vitiated by the lustful and vain insinuations thereof In reading of History 1. You are to propose the best end to your self which is not barely to enable your self for discourse but to be serviceable in your Generation by gaining knowledg of what has been good and well acted by those who have gone before you by acquainting your self also with the fallacies impostures frauds usurpations innovations and whatsoever irregularities else have been committed by any of them That so you may be able to resent and discover the abuses of those who are at present and especially to discover evil designs veil'd under fair pretences and thereby rescue the weak and ignorant from those abuses the proud and crafty would impose upon them 2. Tire not your self with multiplicity of Authors but when you desire to acquaint your self with the transactions Customs Government and manners of any Country advise with those who are knowing and learn from them who has best and most faithfully writ thereof insisting chiefly upon matter of fact and rendring impartially the grounds and secret reasons of all transactions 3. In reading Histories regard not so much the less remarkable and cursory passages thereof but only what is material to the bettering of your manners and that may be in some kind useful for the improvement of our well-being at home The description therefore of places of Palaces great Houses Churches Monasteries Cities Rivers the distances of Towns and many such like passages cast but a transient eye upon taking notice especially of what is good or evil in the Governours in the manners and behaviours of the people judging thereof by the instincts of nature and the rule of right and unperverted reason Aim chiefly at the knowledg of what has been and is now acted in your own Countrey for 't is a vain thing to be well skilled abroad and ignorant at home The end of reading the Roman or Grecian Histories or those of any other Country should be chiefly with reference to what is or ought to be done at home without which respect the knowledg of Foreign matters is a useless
used than despised or therewith reproacht For it being no crime in those who are so from the birth or through some chance or oversight of Parents or Nurses it ought not to be urged or taken notice of without meriting thereby our selves to be so deformed We usually suppose that the minds deformity goes along with that of the body but that is uncertain and therefore never to be reckoned as a sign though sometimes it may be as a cause And this is usually through our own default for we by imprudently observing and reproaching it raise in them thereby a froward and revengful Spirit which setting their brains too often at work makes them subtle in replies and diligent in spying out other mens faults that they may have wherewithal to recriminate Be tender therefore my Son in this particular in justice they ought to have more respect than those who are not so as well to compensate and alleviate the misfortunes of their corporal defects as also to prevent the distortions of their minds which are justly chargeable upon such uncivil advertencies The deformities of the mind are ever worse than those of the body not only as they are the fruits of our own choice and justly chargeable upon our selves but because the Deformed in body are sufferers but those of ugly minds are the doers of evil When thou seest therefore any Deformed be more than ordinary civil to such to avoid all occasion of their distast and tacitly give thanks to God that thou art not so Or if thou chancest to be so in any particular let the goodness and excellencies of thy mind conciliate every bodies kindness towards thee which is the best way of overballancing any Deformity Of a single Life Concerning a single Life It is of two sorts that which is so with resolutions of Chastity and that which is grounded upon abuse of Liberty As to the first I have little to say it being seldom in our Countrey the resolve of Men of Maidens it is often upon sincere love not succeeding or the difficulty of finding a Companion to liking or from observation of the unhappiness of cross marriages and their fears that theirs may be such For the other sort I would by no means have thee to be one of them either from taking too great a liberty or upon any other account except disability of body or Purse If by any accident thou growest impotent make not another miserable and thy self much more by Marriage To Marry where there is no present or probable means of maintaining the unavoidable charge occasions frequently such inconveniences as will soon cool affection and lay a foundation for future sorrows This however is spoken with some allowance for it is common in the World where exigents happen that by doubling of industry and practising necessary frugality preserving especially the deserved reputation of every sort of honesty small beginnings soon grow up and spread into handsome Fabricks making up a decent part of the structure of the World But this is commonly where there is either some small stock of Money or credit or of that which is fully equivalent signal fidelity joyn'd with the real skill in some necessary function or employment For the licentious who not only avoid but declaim against Marriage as an Abridger of their natural liberty I would have thee abhor their Counsels and company as a sort of people from whose Society nothing is gained but propensions to all sorts of vices and certain loss of honesty and reputation You must reckon that but an ill resolve that is grounded upon what is Vitious Which is of so ill credit amongst men that 't is a shame to use arguments for its defence That Marriage is agreeable to Nature it appears for that Men naturally would chuse their Mates and were not their natures perverted would live Chastly and Honestly with them though there were no divine or civil institutions for confirmation thereof But where both these are and are of high esteem there to abandon them upon a pretence of a meer imaginary right and liberty is no doubt the height of folly and is attended with numerous evils the just punishments of such extravagance Again what danger do they continually run in exposing their bodies to the hazzard of a disease of all others the most noisome painful and opprobrious For since they must be slight and vitious Women they frequent what assurance have they but that at every congress they may receive that infection from them which has been imparted to them from others and that heightned too by the use of Mercurial and Antimonial Medecines too frequently ingaged in the cure of that disease To have either no Children which is the common case of such extravagants or such as they shame to own and upon whom they leave a blemish both in the Childrens and the Worlds esteem and of whose education for want of an orderly and regular life in themselves no competent care is taken to prevent those dispositions to vice which both on the Father and Mothers side may well be presumed to be transmitted to them These forsooth are some of the bitter fruits of that sweet Liberty they dare sometimes plead for when through a long practice in vice they have quit shame and modesty the outworks of Vertue and impudently profess what at first they timorously and covertly undertook and are therefore declined by sober and wise men who esteem their Society a blemish and warily caution all their acquaintance to shun them as no less contagious to their minds than a blot to their reputation That weak objection of theirs which is ever ready in their mouths of the numerous cares griefs afflictions which attend a married life which to avoid they account prudence and a true effect of the exercise of reason they are grosly mistaken in For God Almighty has so abundantly overballanc't those cares with the sweet enjoyment of a married life of the sense and relish whereof these by their doting meerly upon sensualities are wholly deprived that they are undergone with much content and delight except where some vitious habits interpose producers of want and necessities otherwise where men do soberly prudently and with a competent industry ingage in business for the maintenance of a Family a thousand pleasures at home daily shew themselves sweetning and rendring easy all the toils of business The Creating Woman a meet help to Man besides the propagation of the World respects the sweetness of converse and Society the mutual assistances that are to be given to each other in sickness and all the cross accidents of life her houswifery and careful providence in governing the Family educating the Children assisting with no despiseable advice and comforting in all afflictions On those depends the honour the content the felicity of the Husband blessings which the licentious were never acquainted with who instead of love meet with flattery and falshood which when means fail shews it self in contempt railings and
treacherey Instead of affectionate and hearty care meet with self-interest and respect which upon occasion and temptation breaks out into disdain reproach private robbery and too frequently into secret Murder For those who have sold their honesty for gain will not stick for the same traffick to venture all And therefore how miserable are those deluded people who part with so much of real and solid happiness to purchase misery and the extreamest hazzardsmen in this world can run Bless God therefore my Son that you are cautioned beforehand and be wise by Counsel rather than by sufferance Of Expences Of Expence I now purpose to advise thee being a matter of no small influence upon thy happiness or misery The world you know is full of people a small part whereof by fine arts or as the fruits of Paternal frugality industry and lucky opportunities have gotten into their hands the fat and plenty of the Land so that the poorer sort live upon the sweat of their brows in their daily labour The middle sort of which number I suppose you may be though they are not so anxiously put to it living more upon the ability and artifice of the brain than the toil of the body yet without care and good husbandry these find it a difficult matter to acquire preserve or increase an estate and consequently to provide well for present occasions devouring casualties and laying up a competency for posterity It is expedient therefore thou should'st so manage and moderate thy expences as neither to deny thy self or thy needful conveniences with due refreshments to sweeten your lives nor yet to bring upon your self a yearly diminution and in time a certain decay of estate the consequence whereof will be either to render thy life Melancholy and disconsolate or to weaken thy honesty by the assault of pressing temptations which though it should stand unshaken against all storms yet it is better human frailty considered not to bring it to the conflict where pressing necessity takes part against it Let me advise thee therefore against the common vanity of Men not to place thy happiness in too much finery or in the imitation of others above thy quality Remember that true reputation is not grounded upon things without but in Honesty and Wisdom What sober men are there who do not prefer a well governed and prudent man in plain habit and that provides answerably for his Family without base pinching and penurious saving before a flaunting prodigal who Comet-like makes a present blaze and draws the eyes of wondring people to him but in a short time vanishes into air and his memory with him Let not as the custom is thy expence rise with thy gains at least but to a moderate proportion for if what thou hast already got be uncertain how much more is the continuation of thy gettings where there are 1000 ways to beget a discontinuance 'T will be a trouble to the mind to be forc't to lower expence when your own vanity is the occasion of it for what is the effect of common casualty and calamity to which all mankind is liable should not bring down a mans esteem in the opinion of others and that straitness which is occasioned by it we should chearfully bear and ought indeed not only to pity but readily to assist in others for 't is certainly in this sense in what ever other that man is said not to be born for himself 'T is needless to give rules for the just proportion of your expence some have done it to the one half of your income others to a third as my Lord Burleigh and Lord Verulam making thereby provision for casualties and for posterity 'T is well where it may so be done but that is only for great estates In the main be careful that at the years end all charges defray'd you are growing and find a competent and pleasing increase so that year goes chearfully round But if you get much and raise your expences answerably at New years day you are but where you were the year before and all your toil and labour amounts not to so much as less gains with honest thrift and rational parsimony would have advanced and then every casualty will be a plummet upon your Spirit and when Portions are called for and you have not wherewithal your Children with your self grow Melancholy and peradventure vitious which is the case of most of the gentry of England and of very many improvident Citizens 'T is a good caution of my Lord Bacons that if you shew upon some great occasion some extravagance in expence it should be in such cases as do very rarely perhaps once in an age happen not in such as may grow into a custom and be a constant charge upon you Neither would I advise you to such a lanching out if you can prudently avoid it which in your middle estate may certainly be done for many are the inconveniences of such high expence and especially because it raises an opinion in your Neighbours that you are wealthier than you are which is of ill consequence and it heightnens the minds of your Children who with all prudential cautions should be bred up to a love of decent thrift and industry whose warm youthfulness will be ever apt to fly out especially if their heat be blown up by your improvident example Consider not expence by retail but in gross or but in passant only so far as to keep it within the bounds thou allowest in the main for the year for what matters it how thy wood thy coals and other wasting materials consume if the waste exceeds not the proportion thou allowest or canst be well content to bear This was alwayes my practice the other I esteemed too troublesome and pedantick of no use unless to trouble the mind and engage it in a vexatious trifle 'T is expedient however to be so far circumspect as to prevent waste and fraud to which Servants being concerned to avoid them by the ties only of Conscience or reputation now little valued are too inclinable This is however to be done in such a manner as may effectually prevent them and not shew too low a suspition which when there is just ground to have remove it speedily by discharging the person suspected otherwise thy mind will never be at rest which fairly do upon some other occasion unless the matter be very apparent and then 't is goood to be plain and express and take some pains with the offender by discourse and good Counsel as well to reform the guilty as to preserve other persons from the like sufferance When thou art married commit the care of those matters and the oversight of particular expence to thy wife for whom it is a meet imployment and diversion who will be ready to advise with thee upon all emergences extraordinary Of Tobacco Now I come to the consideration of that which from custom and the reputation of many of those who are eminent for sobriety and
life which he must also foreknow he cannot avoid for otherwise he could not foreknow them How would it sower and imbitter all his present injoyments to be acquainted before hand that shortly he must break his Leg at another time have his house burnt or lose his Wife and Children or Estate sufficient certainly is the sorrow of each day for it self How does it make the countenance of men and their Spirits to fall when upon losses or other accidents they find the feilure of their Estates and in a short time to their apprehensions an inevitable breaking certainly the anxiety before it happens is greater than after when the worst being known and the discredit digested which is but an imaginary reproach the mind by degrees is quieted Let us therefore give thanks to Almighty God who out of his abundant wisdom and loving kindness to man hath denied us what we so eagerly covet and what would tend to our so great vexation Let us with humble and thankful hearts enjoy the present and so lead our lives that our assurances of the future enjoyment of God in the mansions and society of the blessed may make us contentful in any condition here since it will be but a little time before we shall be possest of eternal beatitude hereafter Of Pride It is meet that I say something of Pride because it is a general vice the cause of much yea most of the evils in the World and not only very prejudicial to others but to our selves also The foundations of it are ignorance and presumption Ignorance I say for though men accounted knowing are very incident to it yet it alwayes arises from their folly in having a better opinion of themselves than they deserve This is evident from this undeniable truth That there is no man without numerous defects the knowledg of the best is poor low and imperfect the possessions of all uncertain matters depending much upon chance exposed to numerous casualties wholly extraneous to man and their estimation depending upon vain opinion Pride has alwayes something of Herods fault for which he was eaten up of Vermine for arrogating honour to himself which is due only to God It makes him apt to practical Atheism that is to rely upon and attribute what he obtains to his own parts and consequently to think he has no need of God But see the consequence of it in the 16 of the Proverbs the 18. Pride goes before destruction and a haughty Spirit before a fall For such contemning God are justly despised by him and then follows that of St. James c. 4. v. 6. He resisteth the proud but sheweth grace to the humble and that of St. Luke 1.51 He scattereth the Proud in the imaginations of their hearts This is true of private persons and of States both which are nearest to destruction when they appear most arrogant and secure It is common with proud men to use an hypocritical humbleness to invite thereby greater respect from others by which they tacitly confess their own unworthiness of which they are justly conscious and bewray the baseness of their own minds They who have most of worth abominate such practices decline it themselves and hate it in others All kind of honour as it should be the recompence of Vertue and true worth so should it flow freely from others who are benefited by good Actions but should never be sought by our selves yea should be avoided not out of a fallacious design of gaining otherwise thereby but from a true sense of our own imperfections and because it is but our duty to do all the good we can That saying of the Poet Contempt of Fame is the contempt of Vertue is grounded upon a false supposition that the motive to Vertue is applause whereas indeed it should arise from a sense of its own excellency and that God has commended it to human practice as that which carries in itself the blessed fruits of peace joy and the solace of the mind as the greatest means of happiness this world can afford us And hence is it that Christ disswaded his followers from accepting worldly Honours Dominion Praise and all other the esteemed darlings of corrupted men preferring to them peace of Conscience here and assurances of real felicities hereafter Consider well of this and let thy mind my Son possess the knowledg thereof lead thy life in conformity to it for thereby thou wilt avoid many evils which the proud are exposed to It s remedy is humility grounded upon a just esteem of our selves and of others In our selves we are chiefly to consider how much we want of what we should be and here we can hardly be mistaken in others to value what we see worthy in them and to consider how easily they may attain if they exceed not already what we judge good in our selves to weigh above all that we are all born for the good one of another and that there is no greater evil to human Society than for us so to love our selves as to be detrimental to others that the love of our selves is the rule and extent of our love to others that 't is Christs great Commandment That no man can truly love God whom he hath not seen if he love not his brother whom he hath seen That we should make our selves equal to men of low degree peradventure as being the best or as having most need of incouragement or to shew that men are not to be esteemed for their riches or disesteemed for their poverty but all are to be lov'd and the vertuous chiefly to be respected Man will soon cease to be proud if he well considers that he has nothing to be proud of not of Wealth or what is purchased by it for 't is no part of himself 't is full of uncertainty the fool or vitious may be master of it as well as the wise and vertuous Not of Honour for if it arise not from good and worthy Actions 't is a false Coin and is therefore contemptible If it be the effect of true desert the foundation of that desert which is vertue will teach him to think meanly of it since vertue praises it self with its own contentment and is rather diminished than satisfied by reward especially since it cannot but be conscious of coming abundantly short of its duty being attended with many defects which are too well known to the possessor Not of Learning and great Parts since both of them are but acquisitions to promote common good and no further valuable but as they do so which carry with them when in the best manner exercised solace and contentment of Mind The great Apostle St. Paul which next to his and our blessed Master did the most good in the world protested that he had nothing to glory in But the Cross of Christ and that he was counted worthy to suffer for the giving testimony to that blessed Name and the profession of his Discipleship renouncing all esteem that might otherwise arise
ripe fruits are horary of short duration whilst others keep round the year 4. If they escape the quicksands of intemperance and follow their Studies hard they commonly prove subtle full of contrivance and exceeding arrogant From such as these commonly the World is chiefly disturbed their great abilities prompting them to great undertakings and when true wisdom and real goodness is wanting they become fit instruments to promote the worst designs You will therefore find in common experience that the best men and the best Magistrates and Governours are those of middle capacities men that understand things well of steddy motion and well grounded perswasion that love to keep the tract of the Law of the antiently established Government that are not capritious that is alwayes in motion changing from one thing to another That love the mild and moderate course and hate cruelty and innovations Whereas the quickwitted and deeply designing men think they hold the Helm of the world in their own hands and can turn it as they please that attempt things out of the course and order of the Law in confidence that they can bear them thorow and out wit their opposers This makes them soon lose their integrity and tie of Conscience which being lost they become mischievous to the World and in conclusion to themselves Hence it is that the main end of this writing is to furnish your mind with solid prudence and steddy honesty that if through industry you acquire substantial knowledge you never imploy it for other ends my Sons but what are consistent with Vertue and your Christian profession and then the more knowledg you have and the more useful Science you are Master of the greater will be your content the more permanent your felicity and the higher esteem you will obtain from the best and wisest men and the blessing of God will alwayes attend you Of the Love that ought to be between Brothers and their Sisters I will close my Advices to you with injoyning you most intirely to love your Brothers and Sisters And notice is to be taken that the Counsel I give to one is to be taken by all When the Poets would describe the worst Age Which they called the Iron Age amongst other the evils which were eminent therein they say Fratrum quoque Gratia rara est There was seldom found any kindness even between Brothers intimating that where so great a tie as Brotherhood could not oblige to a mutual affection it was manifest that the age was in the highest degree depraved 'T is true indeed that man ought to bear an universal respect and kindness towards all for that is natural and a resemblance of the love of God to all minkind But since the world hath been depraved through interest our kindness is what it ought not to be lessened and contracted to a few and there is no hopes to reduce the World to its Original simplicity and common affection However I do advise you my Children to continue that natural affection towards all but especially and in a more eminent manner to maintain it towards your own Relations The Reasons whereunto are 1. Because it is a thing in it self good and laudable it preserves a good Fame and esteem amongst men for it is in this sense that the contempt of Fame is said to be the contempt of Vertue Otherwise to despise Fame when it arises not from good and Vertuous Actions is no crime for it is but despising vain glory Every one will speak well of you all when they observe you to be united not only in blood but in Brotherly Affection 'T is true indeed the Command is universal in which every man is accounted a Neighbour and a Brother for we are all Originally the off-spring of one Man nor do I give you the particular Advice to exclude or lessen the Universal Mandate But considering how the World is depraved what difficulties are introduced even where plenty is to acquire a competent livelihood and that interest draws all men to provide for and take care of their own you will be exceeding blame-worthy to be deficient in that particular 2. If you are to love your Neighbour as your self you are upon a greater tie to love your Brother so inasmuch as you are all the immediate Off-spring of one Father and Mother This Love is several wayes to be manifested as in the care of one anothers health in assisting one another in Counsel upon losses and all difficulties that may occur in your lives For if some of you should prosper and others not the prosperous ought to be helpful to those who are in distress This I would have you cordially and voluntarily do For all kindnesses that come freely are much to be preferred before what are procured by importunity To this you are to be perswaded not only from duty but from interest For if you maintain true friendship and brotherly affection one towards another you will each of you be stronger by Union Which Bond who ever of you breaks through discord and perverseness of Spirit breaks the Law of Christ which commands Brotherly Love neglects the Mandates of a Loving Father and Mother and exposes himself singly to a thousand difficulties which Union would prevent or mitigate Be advised therefore my dear Children and yield obedience frankly and readily to this injunction of your Parents which out of tenderness and great regard to your welfare we leave as an indispensable command upon you But if it shall so happen that any of you should prove rioâ—ous and bring themselves by an evil and debauched life to want and misery though I would have the rest assistant in Councel and indeavour by all amicable and prudent wayes to reclaim and recover them that have so brought evil upon themselves yet do I not think it reasonable that the vices of some of you should bring misery and necessity upon all the rest Rather let them who against all the saving counsel that is given them neglecting the Laws of God and the injunction of Parents bring ruine upon themselves and dishonour to their Family bear the burthen of their own Crimes and smart for their own follies until such time as it appears by a real repentance that they are sensible of the evil of their ways In which case compassion is to be shewn and assistance is to be given freely gladly and without upbraiding For such is the method of Gods goodness who hath declared that there is more joy in Heaven for the recovery of one Sheep which was lost than for the ninety nine which never went astray Take him therefore into your bosom associate with him and joyntly assist him with part of your substance with sound and prudent advice preserve him from Relapse sweetly and affectionately perswade him let him see the difference between good and evil in their own natures and in their effects and consequences Render your Societies very pleasing to him that he may prefer it before that of his