not good marriages religion concurring but set not up your top-sailes and do not beare up your selves above your worth in this respect but wait upon God and be modest lest he pull you downe as fast dwell at home affect not high things if God have indeed a blessing for you in this kinde for else a great match may prove too hot and too heavy to manage let God lay it in your lap ere you affect it and let your goodnesse finde you out while you lye hid And when it s offered you yet swell not say with David marrying Michal Seemeth it small had I not need to looke well about me and with David marrying Michal Seemeth it small had I not need to looke well about me and with Abigail sent for to David Let me wash the feet of the servants of my Lord go from the dignity to the burden take thought how to live with such an one of greater breed and estate then your selves consider what affronts may meet with you the best will save it selfe are you fit to drinke of this bitter cup if discontents should come into the place of peace and love whiles the one is loth to stoop to the others lownesse and the other feares offence if he should suffer it Better it were to desist early then to bring a perpetuall vexation upon your selves too late begge of God humble and wise demeanure even all unequalnesse by religious cariage and selfe deniall lest your preferment prove a penalty rather then a priviledge otherwise as he said of his Diadem he would not have it for the taking up as being fuller of care then comfort who knew the sorrow of it Secondly to them who already live under this yoke of inequality I advise the same which I did to them who are under an inequality of religion looke backe to that Section and read it Onely this let me adde here since your unsutablenesse came from your owne wilfulnesse doe that now which you ought before to have done somewhat out of season perhaps but better late then never humble your selves under Gods afflicting hand remember it is unjust you should fret against Providence and your lot in that which out of your owne choice and free-will you have brought upon your selves Keepe to your selves that straitnesse and pinching which is onely or chiefly knowne to your selves To live like male-contents upbraiding each other and quarreling with God is not onely most sinfull but a disease worse then the remedy it selfe seeing the time was wherein you seemed each to other the most precious of all its reason that now you make the best of a bad bargaine and of each other If then beauty wealth or the like objects so bleared your eyes that you forgat the rule of equality reremember you have finned not only against your own soules but even against them whom you have unequally married who in another equall way might perhaps have lived much better and contentedlier then now they doe with companions of their owne fashion so that you should doubly wrong them by your discontents Rather looke up to God by faith and repentance for your error that it may be covered and that Gods anger being removed you may finde your yoke as tolerable as an unequall one may be And as once a grave man said to one in this case if God ever offer you a new choice beware least you stumble at the stone which once foiled you And so much of this second generall also and of the whole direction serving for the entrance into an honorable marriage now we proceed to that which remaineth in the next Chapter CHAP. IV. A Digression touching consent of Parents and sundry Questions and Objections answered I should now proceed to the second generall head wherof I made an honorable marriage to consist viz. Continuance therein in an holy manner But I am occasioned to stop my course a while for the space of this and the next chapter because an hint of new matter being offered in the former discourse touching consent of Parents and the contracting of the Couples it will be looked for that somewhat be here said about both e're I wade any further in this Argument Of the former thereof in this fourth and of the latter if God please in the fifth and then we returne Touching this former consent of Parents if I should goe about to make any set proofes of so generally a confessed truth which all ages nations histories lawes both divine and humane common civill yea cannon too though with exception with one voyce have averred I might seeme not onely to adde light to the Sunne but to weaken that which I would strengthen yet for order and formes sake a word or two may be premised for the necessity thereof I say necessity in a way of God though not absolute for this businesse of marriage without parents consent is one of them which ought not to have bin done yet being done must availe for the avoyding of worse consequences that is consent is not so essentiall to marriage as some other things are that the non-concurrence thereof should disanull it againe But in a morall and meet way its necessary that marriage be attempted with consent of parents And surely if those heathen Lawes seemed just which yeelded unto parents power of life and death over their children supposing perhaps that love might well enough be trusted and thought it meet enough that they who were the instruments of giving children their naturall life might be permitted to be Iudges of the same children in taking it away or perhaps rather chusing that a parent might kill a vicious childe for some offences then the childe kill the heart of a parent by his dissolutenesse then surely much more may it be yeelded to parents to have power to give life or to marre their marriages I doe not by the way justifie the former law but rather thinke it was a dangerous snare and betrayed the lives of many innocents into the hands of the unmercifull and no doubt if it were in force among us it would provoke many prophane and malicious persons to shed the blood of better children then themselves But I plead the farre greater equity of this law that parents may claime a right in the choice of their childrens marriages Must parents have the worst of it and be debarred from the best beare the burthen of the whole day the providing for their children all meanes of support education either ingenuous or machinall helpe them to Arts Stocks trades which is but to be their drudges if there were no more but so and shall they leave them just at the point of marriage and betake them to their owne wisdome and counsell No surely it 's good cause they share in the honour as well as the labour It it true God makes matches and parents cannot as they desire in such a world as this is wherein all are
the childe may claime the best amends I say then such promises binde not in conscience because the princible of willingnesse is absent and the party would never have consented if such feare and compulsion had not beene used I adde this except afterward the party being freed from such feare and returning to her selfe shall expresse another consent free and ingenuous then the former impediment cannot frustrate this latter promise Thirdly it must also be without deceit or false opinion and that in such a kinde as opposeth marriage essentially Hence those Heathenish presidents of marriages are frustrate when one sexe marries the same Nero was an horrible example when an Eunuch marries a woman or a woman marries an Hermophradite one of the Epicene gender when a man is deceived in the person as Jacob in Lea put into his bed in stead of Rahel notwithstanding the act of copulation but especially when the party supposed to be pure and a virgin proves defiled and corrupted in such a case if it breake out before marriage consummate it doth justly infringe the promise and makes it of none effect This be said touching a binding promise But touching this last of error understand it of no other errors accidentall which doe not of themselves crosse marriage For though they may be such as gave occasion to the party to consent and had the error beene foreknowne the party would not have yeelded yet because they disannull not the reall knot of marriage that is peculiarity of person by defilement therefore they are presumed no other then in some cases would have beene admitted and therefore the party must stick to his or to her promise neverthelesse and therefore let them either beare it as their desart for lacke of inquisition or if they did their indeavour to be informed but were deceived let them take it as the triall which God hath put upon them the promise bindes still except the other party releaseth it And so much for this question Vse 1 Some Vse would doe well ere I leave it because the point is but occasionall and shall be no more returned unto And I would urge these two uses following the one of Admonition the other of Reproofe The admonition is that â—ingle persons be well advised of their promises ere they make them And indeed few words might serve if the former item were well regarded viz. that the speaking of a few words at once may for ever dispossesse them of their liberty never to be recovered fooles once and slaves perpetually So that it s no matter of slightnes and merryment no play no trifle no sport except you will call that a sport which may cost a poore wretch both body and soule Abuer indeed called murder a sporte but bitternesse was in the end of it Be advised therefore and let this point seasonably as a hammer knocke home to the head the former exhortation of marrying in the Lord and wisely to looke well about you e're you venture I pray tell me would you willingly make another man master and owner of any commodity you have for nothing say it were but your horse or cow yea were it but a dogg which you set by I trow not how much lesse of thy selfe Art thou so seelly as to resigne up the right of thy selfe and to make thy selfe a prisoner a captive in the prison of marriage whence there is no escape Surely no except thou art mad and hatest thine own flesh thou wouldst not doe that with a breath which all thy worth cannot revoke and undoe As Salomon saith beware how thou become surety for a stranger quit thy selfe speedily and deliver thy selfe as a Roe and as a bird from the net of the pursuer Man or woman youth or maid looke to your promises I thinke resignation of a mans or womans selfe to an other had not need to be to every commer to every unknowne stranger to each unchast irreligious indiscreet companion which might make thy life irkesome for ever In the promise is the foundation of marriage whether it be well done or ill it can be done but once therefore let it be deliberately wisely and well done Oh! let it be a solemne thought with you my promise gives away my selfe and takes unto my selfe another my liberty is gone If a woman be urged to give up her right onely in a little copy-hold she will shrug at it and thinke well of it before hand And yet shee may possibly recover a better peece of land for a small matter But this free hold of thy person and thy liberty once resigned up and forgone can never be recovered againe Therefore I say be well advised e're thou forfeit it The second use is Terror and Reproofe to all who have disguised themselves in this kind of inconsiderate rash promises You shall have leasure enough to repent if anguish will suffer you Also of all violent parents who to be ridd of their children force them upon unsutable marriages which their children had as leive part with their lives as venture upon and so bring upon them a lasting monument of misery If saith the parent thou refuse this match I will never own thee for my child I will dispossesse thee of all Nay what say you to parents who first defloure virgins and then force their childen to marry the harlots for a cover of their owne villanie Is not this cursed love and cruell command of an inocent child But to be short especially it rebuketh the basenesse of many who cast arrowes and deadly things and say am not I in sport that is who scrue themselves with strong perswasions and arguments into the hearts of such as they sue unto and having so done breake off all againe and wipe off every crumme off their mouthes as if they had eaten no bread Oh you masterlesse persons what are sollemne promises but cobwebs which great flyes can breake through Make ye no bones of them doe ye snap these bandes in two as Samson did his cordes and greene withes There is one who is stronger then you who will not be mocked but bind you for bursting in cheines too strong for you But perhaps you will say if it were my lightnesse and giddinesse it were very sinfull indeed and I deserved never to be trusted more Yes perhaps your word shall be taken but it shall be by such an one as shall make you doe penance against your will all your life for the breach of that promise which you willingly made But you have since that heard sad reports of the party for instance sake That the woman is no huswife or is a Melancholique person not fit for your temper nor yet in a second marriage for your children or she hath some of her owne or some such blemish now you have found out well either these are true or else false Are they false How basely minded art thou whom the pratling tongue of some false sycophant jangler or gossip
deeming many other subjects more worthy and proper to present your Lordship withall But my good Lord such is the estate of fraâ—le flesh in this vaile or misery that there is no condition of lâ—fe whether Ministery Magistracy single or maried state wherin counsell may not doe well for the rectifying of such errors as through humane infirmity breake into all Each state hath his severall temptations and a well ordered course in marriage as long experience of a double marriage can teâ—ch you is no easie Theme â—gaine that sweet and mutuall accord which God hath vouchsafed twixt your Honour and your worthy Consort may serve to turne my Dedâ—cation into a Gratulation And indeed though the Booke be much under the value of such a personage as your selfe a mâ—n not onely of Noble descent but of great and deserving acts both for our Church and Commonwealth both formerly and of late yet I presume that if a draught of muddy wâ—ter presented in the crowne of a hat was so welcome to a potent Monarch then doubtlesse your honourable spirit will not reject a Schollers Mite offered with as deepe respect unto you as that was you will not despise small things since there may be a blessing therein Not alway in a great thing there is good but in a good there is ever great and that which may agree with greatnesse as one tells us out of a Greeke Poet. All helpes shall one day cease yet every booke of use may serve as a little walking-staffe to further us in our travell home Moreover it may become the best Scholler of us all to learne that lesson which Paul and from him my Booke urgeth The time is short wrapt and folded up as the Text is Let them that possesse be as if they possessed not such as weepe as if they wept not such as rejoyce as if they rejoyced not such as marry as if they married not such as use the world as if not using it for the fashion of it passeth away A time for all things and so a time for the married to embrace and a time to bee far from embracing Seeke therefore that place where all these relations shall cease for so I thinke though some thinke otherwise where there shall be no marrying nor giving in marriage for the Spouse shall be wholy spirituall like her husband at least like the Angels of God In which desire I rest craving a blessing from heaven upon your Honour your vertuous and Noble Lady and posterity as also upon the perusall of this your Booke and so humbly take my leave resting At your Honours command in the LORD DANIEL ROGERS To the READER All health IUdicious and religious Reader this Wheele of our Conversation whereof this Booke treates Marriage I meane including many lesser wheeles in and under it all subject to the motion thereof and each of them requiring a due order and direction that both might bee regular and according to knowledge how should I thinke any other but that I have lighted upon this point of Marriage by a speciall Manuduction of Providence Desirous wee are sometimes that the matter we have by us in readinesse might be seasonable also for the times wherein we live But when indeed the manners of our present age seeme to give a life to that which we have before prepared for thou knowest Occasion is the life of a Thing then doubly it appeares seasonable yea as Apples of gold and Pictures of silver Howbeit further musing of the matter sundry other smaller cords concurred to draw me on to this endeavour whereof I will make thee partaker as counting it none of the smallest mercies that I may give an account to the Church of God for the improving and redeeming of my seasons in these sad times wherein that good God who allowes us any the least protection and liberty requires that wee spend it not in vanity and froth but to the best advantage if not as we would for hee is wiser then man yea his foolishnesse and weaknesse exceeds the best wisedome and strength which is in us yet as wee may for the better making up of our reckoning at his comming when the use of our Talents shall be examined First then I observed that Religious Consent betweene couples did not onely fashion the family relations the children and servants much the more orderly but also extended it selfe to the Church and Common-wealth causing those services which concerne publique communion of worshippers to proceed more faire as also the duties of common life to passe more comely then otherwise they would doe One godly and harmonious Couple I have noted to dispatch more good service to God to themselves to their brethren then some ten couples unequally yoaked So true a maxime of Machiavel and his master the Devill it is Hee that would beare rule let him sow discord and division This one wheele then being of so maine importance what need is there that the spokes and staves of it bee sound and well compact according to the rule of the Sanctuary This was one motive I observed moreover that as barren as the world is of good persons and good couples yet here and there are scattered many of a tractable and docible disposition to doe well and to order their marriage course aright Onely their Principles lying rather in a morall way of good affections zeale and duties then in the particular relations of life in which they live as of marriage yea being ignorant of that which should either informe their judgement or order their will thereunto alas they never attaine the Tythe of comfort and content which this estate might affoord them How great pitty were it then to defraud such people of directions who if they might enjoy it would not bee wanting to improve it How many full of knowledge yet live and in marriage especially as if they had none By so much the more its pitty that such should want it as would gladly enjoy the fruit of it And considering that without knowledge the heart is not good and that good intentions without rule are as a goodly Coach without a skilfull driver I conceived I should doe them acceptable service and some glory to God in casting this Platforme of Direction for them out of Gods Word This seemed another inducement Besides these as wee see a great deale of ground vanisheth in a narrow Map which in a larger lyeth open so I have noted that in Sermons or short Touches upon the fifth Command wherein the Preacher onely following his text meets with no such occasions of inquiry much instruction about particular duties of Mariage are concealed which yet in a Treatise appointed for the nonce will offer it selfe fitly to be discussed They that are in a crowd must get through as they can but the doore standing open freely one by one may passe through with ease So is it here a Treatise hath this advantage
wherein such chuse their companions But of this enough A second sort coming here to be reproved are not so debauched as these and yet reproved for their carelesnesse to marry in the Lord. Many not grosly prophane yet because but civill trusting to their wit and policy alone thinking themselves secure enough although they goe not so spiritually to worke as to marry in the Lord are to be taxed by this doctrine So long as they can marry morally such as are free from grosse crimes uncleannesse riot alehouse-haunting and the like such as are of a sweet carriage fashionable and compleat brought up well to a pleasing and outwardly gracefull behaviour especially if there be any meanes to live competently in the world good husbandry and housewivery oh they thinke their choice is excellent yea when children themselves stagger for conscience sake at such offers yet their parents are earnest for the match and vexe themselves to see their children so precise And indeed no wonder when Morality in these times is counted precisenesse And yet tell me what oddes is there between those Benjamites I spake of and those children of God marrying the daughters of men the posterity of Sheth with idolaters what wofull impes proceeded from such a mixture And the truth is even such as professe religion are growne to make such matches without any checke The common question now not onely among great ones or among prophane ones but even among the ordinary sort and such as professe religion is What shall she have What is she worth What joynture can he make who will shew us any good As if men were selling of cattell in a marquet Not thus What is the woman how brought up how qualified with knowledge love of Gods Church meekenesse modesty or other fruits of faith and the spirit which yet are the onely ornaments of wealth and beauty yea more in price with God then all they possesse who enquire so little after them But by that time some of these by had example and for want of the fear of God grow to be bad companions others uncleannesse others spendthrifts and the like then their parents who so shunned religious ones before can wish they had matcht them with religious ones too But it s just that they pierce themselves through with cares who seeke religion out of season rather out of their own ends then for her selfe Hence it is that such solemne marriages in the world as begin with great hopes and honour yet within a few yeeres turne to misery beggery imprisonment defiance of each other to the pit of hell Why Surely because they sought other things as chiefe money and beauty and the like but not religion just it is with God to forsake them and leave them destitute not onely of that they sought not but also of that which they over-chiefly coveâ—ed Not to speake of those base and wicked shifts which some of them are faint to come to as flattery of their betters unclean relations banquerupt-like wayes to borrow what they can and leave men in the luâ—ch Ill marriages are one cause of banquerupts though not the onely for many streams there are that cause this banke to overflow so excessively now a dayes So much of this Thirdly this is reproofe and that of two sorts first such as whereof neither party is religious secondly whereof onely either of the two is such Touching the former we see a wofull patterne of Ahab and Iezabel of whom neither was better though perhaps the one lesse ill but conspired together and set forward each other to mischiefe And indeed so it commonly fals out that if both be bad the woman proves the went It s much what in this sexe as in the inferiour natures of creatures the shee-Beare Lyonesse or Wolfe is the most savage and fierce so here the impotency and unbridelednesse of the sexe makes her more subject to rage unrighteousnesse revenge and wickednesse then a man not to speake of the naturall perswasivenesse of such incensing to evill forcibly ever since Eve tempted Adam Iâ—zabel provoking Ahab to be farre worse then himselfe by saying Art thou now King of Israel and lyest thou upon thy bed as a foole Comâ— and I will give thee the vineyard of Naboth c. The corruption of best is worst and when she who by her kinde should have bin the most modest becomes bold she commonly keepes no bounds of immodesty Two are better then one saith Salomon and woe to him that is alone but here we may sadly invert the words and say One were better then two and woe to those couples who are both bad better had it bin for such to have lived in the mountains to bewaile their virginity yea to dwell with the foxes and wilde beasts in extreame solitarinesse where no other then misery can be looked for then to enter into an hoped condition of welfare to double and treble their owne sorrowes sin and judgement making each other much more the children of Satan then before And verily it is the usuall destiny of the most Families to be pestred with such couples whereof neither is religious but both rude and prophane and studying who should excell the other therein If the one dare lye the other dare sweare to it if the one slander the other will avow it if one be bad the other will be worse And this pleaseth him that brought them together on life that by their vying and out-vying each other in evill they should approve their thanke and service unto him joyning to morall sinnes the omitting or despising of Gods worship and Ordinances within doores or without as Word Sacrament prayer and duties Alas put case that bad couples are not combined in open ungodlinesse and malice but onely in a meere civill formâ—ll and saplesse religion keeping of Sabbaths barrenly or mutuall complacence in each other for the raking up of money making great portions for their children ill brought up and like to spend it as prodigally and mocke them for their labour as one lately did who after his fathers death having found out his hoord of mony cryed out Oh faithful drudge and so waste it out in bravery and fashions pride and pompe of life Or put case they live in a meere harmlesnesse of course spending out their dayes in working eating sleeping neither doing good nor grosse evill welcoming and visiting neighbours liuing curteously wihch I confesse is the best of such yet alas what a miserable life is this in comparison of the true gaine and sweet of a marriage religiously carried But yet the worst is behinde For why rarely doe we see couples thus married to repent themselves of their course but wanze away like shadowes except they dye like beasts without sense and even as they have entred basely and lived worse so the last act of their life is worst and they dye impenitent Oh then in Gods feare
on through a second or a third marriage if it so fall out with as gracelesse an heart as through the first Certainly there remaines nothing for thee save that thy end prove worse then thy beginning because thy troubles brought thee not upon thy knees for thy former sinne but rather thou walkest on still in the frowardnesse of thine heart I proceed to a second duty when thou intendest a change that is be sure thou doe nothing rashly but use all possible wisdome that as thou hast sought the Lord so he would bring thee to a sutable companion A great worke I grant and thou wilt aske how it may be effected I will labour to satisfie thy desire with these advisâ—s following First deny thy selfe renounce that carnall wisdome presumption and will of thine owne which ascribes so much to it selfe as if it needed no advice submit thy selfe to the Lord doe not at first rush thy selfe upon marriage by a necessity of nature or by custome of the world or because yeeres require it or out of base ends to give way to thy lust but let it be thy care to preserve thy vessell in holinesse and honour abstaine from all provocations to lust be much in prayer for a sanctification of every age and condition of life perhaps the Lord hath appointed thee a single life which may be much better for thee then marriage to honour God in perhaps thou art not a meet man for marriage but it would prove incommodious for thee however it s thy duty to try what God hath for thee in store and many repent them for their yeelding to the first pangs of unbrideled youth and wish they had not given way so soone to an impotent humour nay many who at the first intended no other save marriage yet by their more wary and temperate diet company and by subduing their flesh by fasting and prayer meditation and close attendance of study calling or the ordinances of God have obtained such a gift of chastity that they see it is rather the way of God they should not marry There are some saith our Saviour who are Eunuches borne marriage were a snare to such notwithstanding their frothy concupiscence and some have made themselves so for the kingdome of heaven Chastity is a peculiar gift of God all will grant and God will have it appeare in some that grace hath more strength then nature hath as against lusts so above lawfull liberties and he who adviseth continence to some in times of danger especially in which marriage might prove a clogge and otherwise also for a more close cleaving to God without marriage distractions there is no doubt but he hath grace sutable to frame some men and women for this very purpose And sure it is where such a gift is God is highly honoured with the pure and undivided spirit of such as serve him in that condition Therefore all due meanes must be used for the attaining of it till the minde of God be knowne in this kinde and no man ought to forestall providence in that respect weigh well thy strength or thy weaknesse in the ballance lay before thee the burdens and service of marriage thy bodily or spirituall abilities or imperfections play not the part of a foole to say after marriage I never thought it such a state I see now I am not meet for it that should have bin thought of before informe thy selfe duly of the conveniences and inconveniences of each condition the single and the married and when all is done if God incline thee to a private state reserve thy selfe to it I say not to thee vowe it for who knowes but thy minde and body may alter and require a change but so long as by thy abstinence from all provocations and watchfull eye over thy selfe thou canst keepe thy selfe chaste and prove it by the contentation of thy spirit without noy somenesse and neglect of the duties of thy place thou maist gather the will of God by the signe and so thou art to yeeld thy selfe to a single life wherein although there cannot but fall out some petty discommodities in some kinde yet they ought to be digested meekely for the a voyding of worse and the attaining of the benefit of a single estate For when God is in a condition that shall be tolerable to one which would be burdensome to another and there is no state wholly free from trouble in this world onely that is to be embraced as neere as we can which is free from the most And having once understood the way of God goe not out of it wilfully nor dally not with him in such weighty purposes if it please him to alter thy minde thou shalt understand it by signes easily and maist without sinne follow him so thy sinne be not accessary So much for the first counsell which I desire may be conceived of discreetly and not mistaken The secondly if notwithstanding this triall thou shalt finde that God hath alotted marriage to thee know it s a lawfull condition of life be resolved it is so be not snared with feare melancholy or any distemper although it be joyned with many troubles yet they shall be the lester when God tels thee its best and thy gaine shall be above thy losse cast thy selfe upon the ordinance in such a case to make it sweet And therefore prepare thy selfe for it deny thine owne rebellion pride passions will and lust know that marriage is no state as many thinke of licenciousnesse to live at ease and as a man list They who are of that minde neede no other plague then their owne errour to vexe them when they meet with the contrary No no this estate is not for an untamed heifer as soon mayst thou force an Vnicorne to plow with thy Oxen as thy rude spirit to draw in thy yoke of marriage Learne therefore self-deniall betimes it s as essentiall for a married life as for a single humility and wisdome and how hardly this hard Theme will be handled till the heart be subdued and meekened before For all unbroken ones are like to finde sorrow in the flesh double and treble If it be so in the greene tree how much more in the dry If it be unavoydable to the best how much more to them who seeke it So much for the second Thirdly be warned against the common difease both of errour and practice which hath overflowed the world and so bleared the eyes of men that they can see nothing save the outsides of things Suffer not beauty breeding portion personage education with complementall behaviour fashionablenesse and the like so to bribe thy judgement and forestall thine affections that religion should come too late and be thrust out from consultation Beware of covetousnesse pride of life and jollity ambitious and aspiring thoughts to count none meet for thee save such as are
damnifie the rest of their better deserving children and either must runne themselves into endlesse debts by borrowing for them or else be at their curtesie for the releasing of that which they might have kept still in their owne hands By this folly they doe a double mischiefe for first they set the elder on float to be some great persons and raise up their spirits above their estates drawing them to great expence company and at last to ruine and then for the making of the eldest a Gentleman they must leave the rest to beggery either basely to depend upon their brother for meanes which commonly falls short and comes to nothing or else to take debauched courses to steale to sherke for their living Thus the folly of parents upon the sequele of their childrens first matching filles the world with bare yonger bretheren with hangbies and idle ones snaring them with perpetuall discord and quarrells and at last bringing them to most dishonorable ends No no you parents be wise God hath made you your childrens carvers Set your house in order and doe not make confusion among your posterity to please the humor of one child let all have childrens parts Doe not rush your selves into such debts as your heires must be faine to take all and pay all and so fleece the rest Let the eldest carrying himselfe well have a double portion education being considered which the eldest are surest of and the rest a competent allowance for perhaps they may do as much good in their places after as the elder if not more for grace doth not alway goe with Birthright But above all follies in this kind that is most eminent when parents to make their children great thrust themselves out of all that their children might succeed them in their places holding the candle to them while they doe all and act their parts upon the stage And by this meanes both father and mother which have lived in good sort all their time come in their old daies to depend wholy upon their childrens curtesie That part of their life which of all others requires best attendance and maintenance must now become most shiftlesse and desolate They must come out of the hall into the kitchâ—n sit at tables end or in the chimny corner with a poore pittance sent them and at last die in discontent and repenting themselves of their folly But if they may be at good tearmes upon condition of being their servants both without doors and within as droils and drudges they may deeme themselves well apayd For when all strength and ability is gone then are they no longer set by but cast up for hawkes meat despised counted as burdens wherefore to be eased would be no small joy to their children And it its worse with some parents because they live to see all spent and consumed e're they die one and other â—tocke and branches all withered and come to naught Be wise you parents yeeld not your selves captives and prisoners to your children no prison can bee more yrkesome to a parent then a sonne or daughters house Trust neither of them in this case for in truth your selves make the snare and your children put it on you you wrong your children in putting that into their hands which God hath denied them Love must descend not ascend it s not naturall saith Paul for children to provide for parents but for parents to provide for them therefore invert not providence Looke to your consent and looke to those consequences following upon your consent be sure to hold stroake sufficient in your hand for the securing of love and duty from your children You will say all children are not alike in this case its true but the best will bite and the ordinance of God must be attended unto as the first rule in such cases as these Sure bind sure find if you must needs come downe rather chuse to fall into the hands of God then your children Neither must I passe by Guardians and Governours of Orphans in this point many of whom being left as menagers of the stocks and portions of children being now secure of any eie to see or judge them doe most treacherously betray pooore children to misery both before and in their marriages They make the childrens monies payments of their debts enhansing of their owne states and houskeepings bringing up the children at meane termes binding them to base masters and exposing them to the hardest conditions for back belly and conscience When their time of payments come they bring in great billes of expences under color and pretend great debts and charges lying upon them for the execution of the wills of the deceased As for their matches they put them off to inferiour persons such as very mean portions may content and satisfie interverting the rest to their owne ends and by one cunning slight or other eluding the allegations and complaints of their orphans and leaving them to stand to their lot or else to sinke in their sorrowes Our daies are full of these examples and as full of the just hand of God upon such privie theeves and traytors as those Another sort of Guardians authorized by the law to be so although of late God be thanked better order is taken that parents or next of kâ—n may be the undertakers for the children if they will goe to the price doe make a meere marquet of their orphans and sell them as sheepe and swine for money Quite overthrowing the purpose of the law which is to be faithfull for the good of the orphan Instead of offering yea providing meet wives for them such as might bee very way sutable to their place birth and worth what doe they Surely they turne to the spoile and offer them such as they know will be unwelcome and so thereby purchase a great fine unto themselves and leave them to their owne choice and fortunes Others more dishonestly force base and inconvenient matches upon them either matching them to their owne children and so raysing their owne estates thereby or else selling them for mony to others and which is worst of all lest the orphan should suspect and shunne the offer propounded what doe they They marry them in their childhood at 10. 12. or 13. yeares of age long before the time of meet cohabitation sending the one to travaile till he have fulfilled his yong wives yeares who when they returne come to them with a forced affection and that breeds disdaine where there should be greatest affection And hereby growes such distaste betweene the parties that they abandon each others fellowship bed and boord expose each others to most desperate snares and to promiscuous lusts and if there be any reconciliation wrought it s but violent and the cursed fruits of the separation doe so distemper their hearts that they fall at new jarres for their unchastity and disloialty of bodies they renounce some of the children as none of their owne and so doe but
the Prophet had enjoyned thee some great thing shouldst thou not have done it much more to wash and be cleane So I say if the service were farre greater wouldst thou not admit that when the scope is Marry and bee happy Oh but is it enough say these that we be precise in worship and religion and in our conscience to God but we must be so strict in marriage So strict how strict wouldst thou not take as much paines for a purchase Nay for a good Horse or a good Hawke wouldest thou presume both were good enough if price enough were set upon their heads No sure but the rather thou wouldest looke to thy bargaine So doe here thinke not a wife unquestionable because of her price enquire of her true value when thou art married and art stung with his or her unquietnesse unfaithfulnesse uncleannes oh then what injunction should be put upon thee which thou wouldst not yeeld unto to be eased of such a burden in a right way But I cannot promise thee thou shalt prevaile then so well as thou maist prevent it now Doe as some Gentlewomen doe they will take no maids to traine they will have them trained to their hand or else none What will not a foole doe out of season to shunne sorrow when he hath smarted but in season that he might not smart he will not stirre a joynt nor wet his finger To verifie that of Salomon To the foole God gives toile and vexation for his portion because he wil not be wise for his own ease But I have before purposely handled this point I willl trench no more upon it So much for this use of reproofe A second use then to finish all is exhortation to contracted couples to prise their contract for the use of it I shall not need to joy them of it that now they have their desires accomplished that will come alone but let it be their care to sactife themselves and their marriage for time to come It was the custome of the Church of the old Testament to offer sacrifices to God upon solemn occasions as upon solemne meetings of the family when warres were attempted upon any speciall service of God to be performed as fasting thanksgiving Sabbaths circumcision of the children recoveries from sicknesse enjoying of any blessing Hezekia and Jonah deliverd offered sacrifices made songs and vowes Marriage therefore being a speciall change of estate such as befalls once in the life should have no lesse solemne preparation for entrance into it The entry of yong ones into this condition cannot but amase the thoughts and possesse the spirits and powers of the soule more then ordinarily striking jealousie into them least their succes should not answer their expectation and they should not be happy in each other So that upon whom should all this care and burden be cast save Iehova who hath said to married ones as well as others In nothing take thought but in all things commending your selves to God by prayer and and cast your care upon him for he careth for you Let this be your care even the promise of God Yea in the verse immediately following this text of Marriage the Apostle meets with this corruptions in couples let not your conversation be in covetousnesse for he hath said I will not faile thee nor forsake thee It is no easie thing to stirre up a dead heart to reflect meditations of our future estate take this time therefore now the thoughts and passions of of the soule are up in armes now the iron is hot strike some impression of God faith in his alsufficiency and providence into your selves And as the Lord of the Mannor at each alienation comes in for his herriot so now at this your change pay God his fine the best jewell of all you have devote your selves give up your soules to him with mutuall consent rest not in the praiers of others but set close your selves to the Lord in your own supplications both apart and together without seperation Astronomers call the twelve days of the Nativity Criticall for the twelve moneths of the whole yeare the daies of your entry upon marriage should be even such for looke how the constitution and frame of them is so may you expect the time of your marriage will be either for Gods use and the honor of your marriage or for your owne ends Vnblest entrances have naughty successes Recognize with your selves what the solemne opinion and hope is which the Lord his Church and your selves have conceived of you Tremble to thinke how wofull a defeat it were to frustrate them and your selves Acknowledge God to be the ordainer of this estate looke what rules he hath directed you unto for an happy life in this kinde muse of them set your hearts unto them and let them sinke deeply into your hearts take the Lord as a solemne witnes of your intents and purposes to walke by rule as you looke for peace And by strong resolutions bind your fickle hearts as with cords to the Altar and pray God to set his seale to them that they may prove as good silver in the performing as they seemed in the promising And more particularly these two things I advise you unto First looke what especiall base distempers and lusts you have found to sway in you either formerly or since your purpose of marriage labour to purge them out that you may not carry defiled bodies or spirits into the married estate As Physitians at the end of a disease give their patient a clensing potion to expell all scurfe of bad humours remaining so doe you you are entring into a pure and honourable estate honour it before by burying all your Idols and cashiering your base lusts that they crowd not in with you into the wicket of marriage lest if you shall dare to carry an uncleane froward covetous discontented and unsavoury heart with you into that estate the Lord shall accurse you and make them as Judas his sop unto you to defile you for ever after To the pure all things are pure but to the impure every thing even the very minde and conscience are defiled Secondly look what feeble seeds of knowledge and grace were sowne before marriage you ply and attend them carefully for time to come Promise yea secure the Lord beforehand that no contentment of flesh no humouring of each other no reaching at commodity shall so forestall you that this worke of God should be forgotten by you rather lay all sacrifices by the Altar and renew your Covenant both Gods with you and yours with him tell the Lord thus When my husband my wife first met me I was very busie in grounding my selfe in the principles of knowledge the sight of sinne to humble me the truth of the promise to cast me out of my selfe upon the armes of mercy I was occupied about the doctrine and use of regâ—neration union and the new creature now
therof It s an honour to an house to be frequented by the great and honorable How much more when the Lord of heaven and earth shall condescend to dwell in our houses to come in to sit and sup with us whom should he sooner doe so unto then to the peaceable and consenting we know that old maxime of Machiavell if thou wilt reigne divide And our Savior affirmes it If Satan cast out Satan how shall his Kingdome endure No surely Satan must cast out unity and amity if he meane to reigne that he may bring in hellish discord and confusion Even so if God will reigne hee must cast out Satan that he may bring in union and consent between couples There is no agreement betwixt Christ and Belial light and darknes Then and never till then shall religion prayer Sabbathduties holy exercises love to the Saints be enterteyned when consent hath taken up the roome of each others heart So much may serve for Reasons But wherin may some say standes this Consent Answ I answer By these few heads it may bee conceived for the particulars of consent they are infinite as the occasions of life are First in consent of spirit of minde I meane and affection Secondly consent of speech or the tongue Thirdly consent of practice and endeavors For the first of these The principle of marriage consent must be rooted in the heart That each thinke and affect the same things As in Ezekiel its saide of the beasts and the wheeles that when the one went forward the other did so and when the beasts were lifted up the wheeles were lifted up for the spirits of the beaâ—ts were in the wheeles So ought it to be between couples one judgement one mind one heart one soule in two bodies the spirit of the wife in the husband and his in the Lord. That which the flatterer saith in the CoÌ„edy the hatred of the name beeing remooved that should the wife say to the husband Sayst thou a thing So say I. Deniest thou I deny it too And in a word I am prepared for the nonce to agree with thee in all things good honest What is more beautifull to behold in marriage theÌ„ that wherof it is a ResemblaÌ„ce I meane the harmony betweene the Lord Iesus the head and the members to wit his Church Reade the Canticles See how the Church ecchoeth her husbands voyce in all he speaks see how shee pleases her selfe in his comely proportion attire gestures And he againe in hers how shee depends wholly upon his becke and countenance joies in his presence mournes in his absence repozes her selfe in his bosome beeing asleep watcheth his awaking followes after him hangs upon him in his departing longs for his returne and having lost him runs after him as one distracted and bewraies her life to be bound up in his as Iacobs in Benjamins This inward complacence welpleasing and welapayednesse of couples in each other is the very quintessence of marriage peace and contentment As in the mysticall body of Christ we see what an instinct is in them to maynteine their owne beeing in the welfare of each other All envy wrath suspicion jealousie unkindnes pride censure and whatsoever else savoring of selflove and seperation beeing odious to them Each doing his owne service content with his owne portion mourning with any that is ill at ease and glad of their welfare Secondly this consent must be in the speech and language of them both It s true generally but in this point specially That speech is the discoverer of the mind Looke what the abundance of the heart is that will vent it selfe at the mouth So the husband and wife should answer to each other as Iehoshaphat to Iehoram I am as thou art my people are as thine my horses as thine Yea the speech of each to other should bee without flattery as the glasse to behold each other in As face answers to face in the water so doth a man accomodate himselfe to his friend sayth Salomon how much more the husband and wife to each other They should even resemble each the others frame and temper in the Lord with all ingenuity As the beames do represent the Sun in her heat and light so should the sweet carriage of the wife argue the body which gives her influence even her husbands vertues And lastly there ought not onely to be this harmony in presence onely but in absence also even in the way of their Conversation abroad in company in duties of Sabbath of Christian communion whether together or asunder such should be the reflexion of a wives carriage that all that see her may see the wisdome thoughts affections of the husband in her not a carriage of her owne as of one severed from his way slighting his as if shee were wiser but humbly submitting judgment will and spirit to his in the Lord and where there is any difference so it be grounded keeping it secret and acquainting God with it as shee did when she felt strife in her wombe that he might reconcile it and settle it aright in time For in such a Case discreet concealment will far sooner reduce them together then open expression of their differences The actions of the one should bee the shadow of the others yea a modell thereof As it was once betweene David and his new subjects whatsoever liked David that was presently pleasing to all his people they agreed at an haires bredth This threefold corde of heart mouth and worke is not easily broken Vses I shall make these three appear better in uses of the point to the which I hasten Vse 1 First then what bitter reproofe is this to the most even of such as seeme to stand to Gods barre and triall I passe by the ruder sort of barbarous people rusticall and profane who never yet came into the garden where this grace grew such as passe their daies eyther in brutish and Nabalish churlishnes brawling fighting and quarrelling together or else consent onely in evill serving each the others turne according to those vices they are enclined unto as the world to take together portions for their childreÌ„ by hooke or crooke or pleasures and libertyes or pride of life and fashions or envious pursuit of their Enemâ—es slander or the like sins of the tongue I say to leave such who would looke for such differences of spirit and temper among such as pretend great zeale in profession A man would thinke when hee lookes narrowly into them that they are set as marks of opposition each to other then resemblers of their affections joyes and desires verely I have often seen it to the shame of such I speake it that among some ignorant couples whom onely naturall likenes of maners or civill education hath handsomed there is found more love and accorde then among some such as daily keep on foot the worship of God in their families Shall I praise
thy husband on earth and please a better in heaven who will bring forth his doves from the crocky pots and that with honor when they commit themselves to him in their innocency Wheras flattering and temporising women who in shew will hold with God but yet keep quarter with ungodly husbands for their own ends shall at last be detected for hypocrites and rewarded with reproach and dishonor I shall insist in the next Chapter in another Exception which allowes a woman such a libertie in Gods matters with her husband as to prompt and occasion unto him Christian speech good counsell with modestie and in season for the subjection we treate of is not flavish but equall royall in a sort as I have noted But to go on Shee is not so to be subject as if in all cases she ought alike to stand or fall at the barre and prerogative of her husbands will Some cases fall out betweene them of greater difficulty doubt and danger then ordinary such as extend to the hazarde of estate children yea liberty and life it selfe In such cases if they be but arbitrary as removall from present dwelling upon great charge and losse or to places of ill health ill neighbors with losse of Gospell long voyages by sea to remote Plantations or in the sudden change of Trades or venturing of a stocke upon some new project lending out or borrowing of great sums avoyding of debts setling of estate providing for children costly buildings great enterteynments beyond ability or such like instances wherin the woman is like to share as deep in the sorrow if not more then the husband reason good shee should share in the advise and not be compelled to obey perforce An husband perhaps in such cases may necessitate his wife to yeeld but he doth her the more wrong for God in such cases leaves her to her freedome Could a Martyr in Queene Marles dayes compell his wife to suffer in the same cause with himselfe although both were of the same judgment No for her Conscience was her owne and his measure might haply exceed hers many degrees both in knowledge faith and Courage It hath bine by some very strangely determined that if an husband be resolved upon a remote plantation the wife must follow by hand and by head But under correction it s neither so nor so headship is not given the husband to destroy but to helpe and edifye She hath a judgement to inform as well as he must see her groundes cleere as wel as he she must have leasure tyme to deliberate of it as well as he till she be resolved that she may do that in faith which shee doth Therfore with modesty and discretion it s allowed her to deliberate to alledge her reasons by her selfe or by her friends submitting them to the judgement of wiser then her selfe and as shee shal be cast and adjudged so to deny her selfe and obey either way And when Gods will is made knowne eyther he or shee are to rest without further distemper each with other Meane while the husband is not to insult threaten and domineer over her as a Lord who had his wives will captived to his owne neither to desert and depart from her in a desperate way but by all loving waies tenderly to draw her and convince her by the strength of reason and the bowells of compassion God speakes not now by lively voice from heaven in such doubtfull cases as once he pleased to doe in times past Sara therby knew Gods will in her jorne is too and fro as well as Abraham and had his promise of protection aswell as he therfore her Subjection ties not women in like adventures now as then But now doubtfull cases must be scanned and determined according to the neerest that Scripture or reason import that so her obedience may rather flow from consent then compulsion Thus I have sayde more of the first branch then I had intended to do not so properly as necessarily to spare my selfe a labour in another place let me now sound retreat to my readers thoughts and come to the second branch of my division that is the subjection of the womans practice Which although it be but a shadow without the other yet that must not pass for the whole paiment of the debt for who may not say their heart is good this way when as their conversation shews it not But a subject heart appeares best when a woman saies little of that which is within but leaves to them to judge who heare and see And this practice of the womans subjection must appeare in these three particulars in matters of Gods worship in matter of the world and in her marriage converse For the first she is with an awful and single eie and honouring heart to behold in her husband the gifts of God As namely that ability which God hath given him to be in Gods steed unto her in all things pertayning unto her soule as also to menage the services of God with her either in the family or apart as to reade the word judiciously to catechize and informe in the grounds of religion distinctly to admonish the family against the sinnes and exhort inferiors to the duties of their order and condition wife children so jorners servants I say she ought so to observe Gods image in these gifts of her husband as to feel no spirit in her to despise him to gain say to compare or censure them Yea though her own gifts be more then ordinary yet to conceale suppress them in this kind except her husband shall at any time desire to bee partaker therof in private for his spirituall quickning and then with all humble self deniall to impart her selfe with him and enjoy them to her self in subjection Note it that the Apost when he is in the midst of his urging this duty to the wife then doth he touch this point saying let the woman learne in silence and I suffer not the woman to teach or usurpe authority over the man but to be in silence You must note that in this age the spirit of God was powred upon all flesh so that women as well as men had great gifts of understanding and prophecy vouchsafed them which no doubt might put them forward to expresse themselves before their husbands Now if such women then how much more must ordinary womē be subject in this kind to their husbands She ought indeed to encourage her husband cordially to proceed in such a course shewing it to be the joy of her heart when she sees him to set up God in the family She is to remove to the uttermost all lets and stops which might offend as unseasonable attendance upon businesse which commonly offers it selfe most when it least should also the complaints and trouble of childrē with other occasions of the family as that might by her wise prevention be cast upō other times as wel I
be found fault with looking that his merits should pleade pardon for all his defects So it is with many women otherwise housewife like and commendable that they are waspish froward holding their husbands at staves end or otherwise taynted But will they endure to be told of it By no meanes Have I this say they for my providence diligence Nay as Ioab despitefully told David in his heavinesse for Absalon so they cast their husbands in teeth I see now if I had beene wastfull and licentious I should have beene better accepted yea truly a waster is not much worse then a shrew Thrifty or unthrifty thou art little accepted except subject and peaceable Rather thy one vertue should make thee more studious of others carefull to shunne other vices which should fully and darken them But they run into another veyne and aske their husbands what if you had such a wife so expensive and costly as this or that man hath Alas what froth of a base heart is here Who will deny but a vertuous wife may sometimes come short of an exact houswife Doth that argue that such an housewife may plead it to defend all her grosser Qualities The Town-Clerke sayd well to the people of Ephesus Diana is a great Goddesse indeed who can deny it But what 's that to this confused mutiny and outcry So here Therfore O woman if thou bee so worthie let thy right hand be ignorant what thy left hand doth let others prayse thee not thy owne lips Thy bad qualities will sooner blemish thy good then thy good excuse them For who seeing a Ring of Gold in a swines snout wisheth it not upon some fayre finger rather then to be disgraced by the swine It s true that a wastfull women is the bane of her husband in one kind but so may the thrifty in another by her shrewishnes poison may kill as well one as kill many waies And what avayles it a man if he must die that he rather is hanged then beheaded they are but two waies to bring to one death And what folly is it to turne off the accusation of a fault which admits no defence by that vertue which is neither blamed nor aymed at Ioine other good parts with Providence and then the lumpe shal be holy but one sinner destroyeth much good one dead fly marres a great deale of sweet Oyntment as Salomon saith of two duties so apprehend the one as thou withdraw not thine hand from the other So I say to thee so lay hold on providence that yet thou renounce not thy subjection She that feares God shall come out of both extreames There is no necessity that one be fallen upon by shunning the other Vngodly Improvidence is bad and brutish drudgery is worse The Droyle overloding herselfe with moiling and care disables herselfe from goodnesse and the improvident by her sloth deprives her selfe of all opportunity either of doing good or taking it The middle way is the golden way Thus much of the second branch of the wives providence in matters of the world The third and last followes and that is in the service of the married life in the manifold passages of which both towards his person his state body life health name and posterity she must be helpfull To this end she was made Of all good couples that is verified two are better then one because they have a good reward for their labour Eccles 4. 9. And if one fall the other will lift him up againe And if one prevaile against him two shall withstand him and a threefold cord is not easily broken Marke the Lord hath appointed marriage as the union of two weake ones apart to become a strong twist in one cord to make one strength This is true of all combinations two students two partners two travellers two neighbours two friends but above all most true in the married estate In the absence of the one the other is present when one is downe and sicke the other commonly is up in the ignorance doubts inexperience feares of the one the other is an helper at hand Two see more then one by my wives ere foot hand wisedome I see walke worke contrive and dispatch businesses which else I could not No such Vicegerent â—ojadjutor as the wife whether together or asunder Though the head hath the leading part yet the body hath the attending part neither without other could effect ought The acts of marriage are reciprocall As we see in them that handle the long sawe there must bee a paire of hands reciprocating the toole through the timber or else no sawing it into pieces An helper without an head is better then an helper alone A little to insist upon each particular First the wife is to be an helper to her husbands person eveÌ„ a Bulwarke a Fort in distresse of safegard defence She is but a little one but oh shall I not escape thither and be safe said Lot in that storme So is she a covert under God against the storme and rayne She is so under covert that yet shee is a covert againe She is not terrible as Banners but she is a safe buckler of defence against any impression of danger of Enemy either foreseeing and preventing or meeting repelling it Despise her not there is a blessing in her A woman once delivered a city another overcame an army a third slew a Tyrant yet there was another a wife Abigail who objecting her selfe betweene her husbands syde and Davids blow saved the one and the other from bloodshed Such a prop was that poore Shunamite who without any din or distemper lockt up her dead childe brought home the Prophet who restored it to life Shee is not as Dalila who bringing Samson into a sleep upon her knee betrayd his life saying the Philistins bee upon thee Shee is a Micoll who when her husband was escaped from Saul layde an Image in the bed to while the Pursuers as if he had beene in bed but therby preserved his person from slaughter She is a like preserver to his soule a little to harpe againe upon this string suggesting whole some counseil to it Her voyce is quite contrary to that of Iobs wife Not Curse God and die But Continue deer husband in thy integrity Be thy Crosses what thy will bee still trust and wayt deny not the Almighty we shall see a good end one day Shee is not as Iephthah said of his poore daughter Among them that trouble him that damne him and lay a snare to entrap him in sin or consenting to him in sin as Sapphira to Ananias nor yet carelesse which end goe forward so shee may compasse her wicked content as Jezabel in Naboths death made way for her owne and her husbands ruine If shee can keepe him close to God shee will but shee will never bid him curse God renounce obedience and dye Nextly shee is an helper to
corruption cannot recover it by faith and this disquiets them the losse of a pig a chicken will vexe by consent because there is a worse vexer within But as wee know if a woman had found a pearle worth an hundreth pound shee would be overjoyed Christ speakes but of a groate so that if she should heare she had lost one of her goslings it would little affect her so if this faith were within the bosome the losses of toies the occasions of common anger in the family would cease That would change all as Christ calmed the sea And secondly for the life of it what gold is so precious as is the triall of faith Marriage is as full of troubles as a Crowne of cares Sorrow there is sufficient to each day to a womaÌ„ by name breeding bearing bringing forth many losses she meetes with false aspersions feare of debts wrong of ill neighbors and enemies deprivall of health her deerest children sundry diseases ill successes what were then the life of a woman under all these but miserie if she beleeved not in the son of God and hoped for a good end That although she cannot say All is yet she may say All shal be well when the houre of Redeemed ones is come This life of faith wil make the bush though it burne yet not to consume and will bring the Son of God to walke with her in the hot fornace who wil keep away the savor as wel as the power of fire from theÌ„ Therfore Sara and the widow of Zarepta and of Shunem and Rebecca are brought in as beleevers in that cloude of witnesses as well as Abraham and Isaac and Iacob So base is that speech of some Atheists that women must meddle with no faith but wrap themselves up in their husbands A fourth grace is Innocency and truth A compound of two in one The one is a brestplate of defence the other a Golden Girdle to gird all other graces of Gods spirit close to her These I grant are peeces or Armor for Champions but I understand my selfe to speake of women Captains and conquerors as I tolde you before and you know fayth is no effeminate grace though feminine but overcomes the world And why should a shield of Faith which serves to defend both the body and the Armour of it too go without a Brestplate and a girdle Debora if shee will go into the feeld shee must be armed and a woman is not free from assaults and perill shot and darts aswel as a man in this feeld of the worlde therfore must learne to put on this armour God hath no other for men then women though women must not put on mens apparrel yet they must be clad in the same armor of light That will make them shot-free The Emperor Charles the 5. went among the thickest of his souldiers and tolde his men That a true Emperor was never shot with a Bullet But I am sure of this That this Brest plate is armor of proofe An innocent hermelesse quiet woman shall not be ashamed to meete her enemies in the gates yea though it were of hell wheÌ„ things come to be debated her uprightnes and righteousnes shall deliver her Innocency shal be her defence against evill tongues abroad truth against an ill conscience within wheras the guilty and treacherous woman will betray her selfe and lose the day That very harlot true in nothing but that shee was the infants mothe â—by her truth escaped the swords censure A miescheevous woman or a woman-lyar who can endure And who would not go or ride a far journey to see this other warlike woman Those Heroines of whom story and Poëts so talke as Penthesilea and the like were not so gracefull a sight nor those Amazons that seared off one dug that they might shoot were no such spectacles as these women clad in innocency and truthe Their name is more fragrant then sweet oyntment and there is no dead fly to make it stinke A fifth grace is zeale and prety For the former it serves to make the woman a stirring housewife for God as Diligence makes her so for her husband Meeknesse in her own matters well becomes her who is earnest in Gods If a woman man would be hot and fiery let her turne it to God and for his cause and this will make her coole and calme in her own As bleeding on the arme by art stops unnaturall bleeding by fluxe so zeale for God cooles the heat of corrupt passion to man This grace becomes this sexe the rather because it argues truth of grace for else calmenesse of her frame naturally carries her to flatnesse and fulsomnesse It must be with a Christian woman as it is in nature with the female sexe of the creatures Nature hath put a fircenesse into the female because of the impotency thereof therefore the she Beare the Lyonesse are the most raging and cruell But grace makes that naturall impotency of the woman turne impotency for God as to provoke her husband with sweet affections for his servants and worship It was a great praise for the sexe that God would send his Prophet in the famine rather to try the piety of the widdow of Zareptha an heathen then any of the sonnes of Israel And it was the honour of those wealthy women Joanna the wife of Herods Steward and other the like to be the pious supporters of the Lord Iesus his body when hee had not whereon to lay his head And at this day if estimation be made God is as much if not more honoured with the forwardnesse of women then of men their nature being fearfull hath ever beene proner to superstition as in Ezekiel those women that wept from Tammuz those devout Grecian Gentlewomen stird up by the Iewes against Paul and where they are out of the way none are worse But grace overruling corruption turnes superstition into zeale and devotion into religion and then its comely Mens spirits are hardier doe not so easily feare Majesty tremble at judgemnts beleeve promises shun sinne love good as women so that when they are in the way none are better none sooner embrace the Gospell if it come a new to a place none more readily joine together in communion none more tender hearted to the distressed and such as suffer for Christs name God hath his women that wove scarlet and twined linnen for his Tabernacle as Manasseh had for his Idolls Oh! how sweet a sight is it to see these Votaries not of the Pope but the Lord Iesus who can thinke of that honorable Countesse of Richmond and Derby without admiration the founder of so many Colledges and Hospitalls I omit to speake of all whose praise is in the gospell wee have many worthy momen in our daies exceeding men in these pieties and zealous duties Oh goe on hold your daily entercourse with God! keepe quarter with heaven have your conversation where your treasure is and with that
the murther of Amnon then the treason of Absalon both whom he should have slaine and taken from the earth together with his just execution by Ioah the child it selfe conceived in adultery should have beene the first the open defiling of all his Concubines in the face of the sun as he had defiled others in secret The perptuall unhappinesse of his course all his life to his dying day never free from sorrow and even then in the usurpation of Adonijah what godly man ever suffred so in his children himselfe living to see it as hee why should God sit in judgment upon his owne favorite for this sin save to scare all to whom this story should come even to the worlds end And what became of Salomons glory Was it not all blasted by this sin of uncleannesse Although he lived not to see it yet what a spectacle of ruine did the Lord make Rehoboam Stripping him of the ten tribes and of the richest kingdome in his fathers daies making it the poorest that it had ever bine before What made Sampson of a judge in Israel yea a Giant a conqueror to become a foole in Israel a blynde slave to grinde in a mill save the besotting of himselfe with lust How dealt God with those Israelits at Poor Did he not set his vicegerent Phinees on work to thrug throusth the cheefe ringleaders ere he could bee pacified And when the heate of wrath seem'd to be slaked did it so vanish Did not the taile of that plague sweepe away foure and twenty thousand Coulde their priviledge of beeing Gods people save them Where is now thy mouth as he sayd who callest adultery but a tricke of youth In steed of one cloake which men use to put upon it of slightnesse what cloak doth the Lord put upon it Surely a Cloake bathed in the blood of so many thousand adulterers I was not this enough to drive men from such dalliance Who might not thenceforth call it by the name of a bloody sin of a scarlet die What shall say of our own experiēce How many have we heard of struck dead by the hand of God taking thē in the act Not suffring them to go out of the bed of uncleannes whether hath God come in person to judge such or no. And although many have bin suffred to escape such judgments yet how many missing the Beare have met with the Lion out of the horror of their conscience some dashing their braines against the walls others stabbd ' drownd ' hangd ' themselves To penne out of severall writers who have written Theaters of Gods judgements the examples of such as God hath plagued is not my scope Alas these bee daies wherin men will rather sit upon God himselfe and scorne him to his face then tremble at Gods sitting in judgement upon Adulterers But there be books which doe at large supply us in this kind if our hearts bee not quite sunke into a senslessenes of them Even while I was writing this lest I should want unsought presidents a reporte came to mine eares of a Black-smith neer Colchester whose wound is as it were yet bleeding who having made a Cheine to hang a woman that had murthered her husband fell into such suddeine terrors by Gods hand oppressing his conscience for his Adulterous life that he cried out saying that he was as wicked as shee for whom he had made the cheyne so that he could not lin till by cutting his own throate he had made an end of himselfe So the Lord pulles out some to be spectacles of reproach and detestation to the world though thousands scape All are not drag'd out by the hand of God openly as that bawdy Bishop at the Councell of Trent whom Sleidan mentions who creeping out of his window along the leades to the wife of the next house was watcht by her husband and catcht in a grinne or snare laid for him in his passage and there hung by the neck as a ridiculous object to all the beholders But I say because men object that thousands scape to some odde persons whom vengeance intercepts Tell me what better portion have they who survive then the other What one sinne hath so manifold markes of wrath upon it as this upon the soule body or person sinning as by the sequell may appeare First for soule what sinne hath found lesse place for repentance then this Closenesse secrecy shifts alway attending it which keepe the heart from all tendernesse yea defile and disable the soule from repenting nay the curse of God sealing up that soule to impenitency some walking ten some twenty some more yeeres in the guilt hereof yet with a smothered conscience and although they be wounded yet hardly healed in a kindly manner but suffering their hearts to rankle inward and outbidding all ordinances to their destruction How can it be but such a sore must break forth all at once with such a forcible outcry that nothing can still or satisfie it Secondly what sinne hath so foule a blemish and dishonour cast upon the name of the committer as this With what a blot doe wee thinke or speak of Sampson to this day And how many Divines though amisse have deeply questioned Salomons salvation Touching the outward name what a blot and infamy do they for ever procure What an infectious plague hath it prooved in the stock of the Adulterer No space of time hath purged it it hath beene as the fretting leprosie in the walls which nothing could heale save pulling downe the whole race and family from the very foundations Jeroboams name not being more prodigious and odious in Israel then an Adulterers in the Church of God as if such or such a family had bought the staple of the trade So that it is observed that this sinne hath so defiled the blood of some families that they are no sooner named but their kind is offensive scarse any in such families beeing noted to bee chast What a stinch might such cause and even a taint to a whole Country How just were it for God to pull downe the whole houses of such sticke and stone no memory of such to bee left behind How just were it having first motheaten their name by dishonor to come upon their persons as a Lyon and teare them in peeces Is not the finger of God here as they told Pharaoh when men on earth who should have censured them suffer these nasty creatures to lurke in their sties and dens poysoning the Country with their breath hath the Lord let them alone Hath he not beene fame to step in himselfe and by suddaine vengeance to cut them off And if such censures were in force as we are bidde◠to pray for in the Church of God such discipline I mean in the Church could such a sin as this escape the dint of Excommunication the greatest dart of wrath Should we have had such notorious whoremongers brought forth in the famousest places in the