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A16923 The antipodes a comedie. Acted in the yeare 1638. by the Queenes Majesties Servants, at Salisbury Court in Fleet-street. The author Richard Brome. Brome, Richard, d. 1652? 1640 (1640) STC 3818; ESTC S106712 50,436 90

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Child shall thanke you for it when I have one I take no joy in toyes since I was marryed Let. Prettily answer'd I make you no stranger Kind Mistris Blaze Bar. Time was your honour us'd Me strangely too as you 'll doe these I doubt not Let. Honest Blaze Prethee goe in there is an Actor wanting Bla. Is there a part for me how shall I study 't Let. Thou shalt say nothing Bla. Then if I doe not act Nothing as well as the best of 'hem let me be hist Exit Ioy. I say restore the Ring and backe with me Dia. To whom shall I restore it Ioy. To the Lord that sent it Dia. Is he a Lord I alwayes thought and heard i th' Country Lords were gallant Creatures He Looks like a thing not worth it t is not his The Doctor gave it me and I will keepe it Let I use small verball courtesie Mr. Ioylesse You see but what I can in deed I le doe You know the purpose of your comming and I can but give you welcome If your sonne Shall receive ease in 't be the comfort yours The credit of 't my Doctors You are sad Ioy. My Lord I would entreat we may returne I feare my wife 's not well Let. Returne I pray slight not so my courtesie Dia. Besides sir I am well and have a minde A thankfull one to taste my Lords free bounty I never saw a play and would be loath To lose my longing now Ioy. The aire of London Hath tainted her obedience already And should the Play but touch the vices of it She 'd learne and practise 'hem Let me beseech Your Lord ships reacceptance of the un Merited favour that she weares here and Your leave for our departure Let. J will not Be so dishonoured nor become so ill A master of my house to let a Lady Leave it against her will and from her longing J will be plaine wi'yee therefore If your haste Must needs post you away you may depart She shall not not till the morning for mine honour Ioy. Indeed t is a high poynt of honour in A Lord to keepe a private Gentlemans wife From him Dia. J love this plaine Lord better than All the brave gallant ones that ere I dream't on Let. T is time we take our seats So if you 'll stay Come sit with us if not you know your way Ioy. Here are we fallen through the Doctors fingers Into the Lords hands Fate deliver us Ex. omnes Act. 2. Sene 4. Enter in sea-gownes and Caps Doctor and Perigrine brought in a chaire by 2 Sailers Cloaks and Hats brought in Doct. Now the last minute of his sleeping fit Determines Raise him on his feete So so Rest him upon mine Arme Remove that Chaire Welcome a shore Sir in th' Antipodes Per. Are we arriv'd so farre Doct. And on firme land Sailers you may returne now to your ship Ex. Sail. Per. What worlds of lands and Seas have I past over Neglecting to set downe my observations A thousand thousand things remarkable Have slipt my memory as if all had beene Meere shadowy phantasmes or Phantasticke dreames Doct. We 'll write as we returne Sir and t is true You slept most part o' th' journey hitherward The aire was so somniferous And t was well You scap'd the Calenture by 't Per. But how long doe you thinke I slept Doct. Eight moneths and some odde dayes Which was but as so many houres and minutes Of ones owne naturall Country sleepe Per. Eight Moneths Doct. T was nothing for so young a Braine How thinke you one of the seven Christian Champions David by name slept seven yeares in a Leek-bed Per. I thinke I have read it in their famous History Doct. But what chiefe thing of note now in our Travells Can you call presently to mind Speake like a Traveller Per. I doe remember as we past the Verge O' th' upper world comming downe down-hill The setting Sunne then bidding them good night Came gliding easily downe by us and strucke New day before us lighting us our way But with such heate that till he was got farre Before us we even melted Doct. Well wrought potion Very well observ'd sir But now we are come into a temperate clime Of equall composition of elements With that of London and as well agreeable Unto our nature as you have found that aire Per. I never was at London Doct. Cry you mercy This Sir is Anti London That 's the' Antipodes To the grand City of our Nation Iust the same people language and Religion But contrary in Manners as I ha' told you Per. I doe remember that relation As if you had but given it me this morning Doct. Now cast your Sea weeds off and do'n fresh garments Hearke sir their Musicke Act 2. Scene 5. Shift Hoboyes Enter Letoy Ioylesse Diana Martha Barara in Masques they sit at the other end of the stage Let. Here we may sit and he not see us Doct. Now see one of the Natives of this Country Note his attire his language and behaviour Enter Quailpipe Prologue Qua. Our farre fetch'd Title over lands and seas Offers unto your view th' Antipodes But what Antipodes now shall you see Even those that foot to foot 'gainst London be Because no Traveller that knowes that state Shall say we personate or imitate Them in our actions For nothing can Almost be spoke but some or other man Takes it unto himselfe and sayes the stuffe If it be vicious or absurd enough Was woven upon his backe Farre farre be all That bring such prejudice mixt with their gall This play shall no Satyrick Timist be To taxe or touch at either him or thee That art notorious T is so farre below Things in our orbe that doe among us flow That no degree from Keyser to the Clowne Shall say this vice or folly was mine owne Let. This had bin well now if you had not dreamt Too long upon your sillables Ex. Prol. Dia. The Prologue call you this my Lord Bar. T is my Lords Reader and as good a lad Out of his function as I would desire To mixe withall in civill conversation Let. Yes Lady this was Prologue to the Play As this is to our sweet ensuing pleasures Kisse Ioy. Kissing indeed is Prologue to a Play Compos'd by th' Divell and acted by the Children Of his blacke Revells may hell take yee for 't Mar. Indeed I am weary and would faine goe home Bar. Indeed but you must stay and see the play Mar. The Play what play It is no Childrens play Nor no Child-getting play pray is it Bar. You 'll see anon O now the Actors enter Flourish Act 2. Scene 6. Enter two Sergeants with swords drawne running before a Gentleman Gent. Why doe you not your office courteous friends Let me entreat you stay and take me with you Lay but your hands on mee I shall not rest untill I be arrested A sore shoulder-ache Paines and torments me till your vertuous hands Doe
THE ANTIPODES A COMEDIE Acted in the yeare 1638. by the Queenes Majesties Servants at Salisbury Court in Fleet-street The Author Richard Brome Hic totus volo rideat Libellus Mart. LONDON Printed by I. Okes for Francis Constable and are to be sold at his shops in Kings-street at the signe of the Goat and in Westminster-hall 1640 TO THE RIGHT Honourable VVILLIAM Earle of Hertford c. My Lord THe long experience I have had of your Honours favourable intentions towards me hath compell'd me to this Presumption But I hope your Goodnesse will be pleased to pardon what your Benignity was the cause of viz. the errour of my Dedication Had your Candor not encourag'd me in this I had beene innocent Yet I beseech you thinke not I intend it any other then your Recreation at your retirement from your weighty Employments and to be the Declaration of your gracious encouragements towards me and the testimony of my Gratitude If the publicke view of the world entertayn it with no lesse welcome then that private one of the Stage already has given it I shall be glad the World owes you the Thankes If it meet with too severe Construction I hope your Protection What hazards soever it shall justle with my desires are it may pleasure your Lordship in the perusall which is the only ambition he is conscious of who is My Lord Your Honour 's humbly devoted Richard Brome To censuring Criticks on the approved Comedy The Antipodes IOnson 's alive the World admiring stands And to declare his welcome there shake hands Apollo's Pensioners may wipe their eyes And stiflle their abortive Elegies Taylor his Goose-quill may abjure againe And to make Paper deare scribling refraine For sure there 's cause of neither Ionson's ghost Is not a Tenant i' the Elizian Coast But vext with too much scorne at your dispraise Silently stole unto a grove of Bayes Therefore bewaile your errours and entreat He will returne unto the former seat Whence he was often pleas'd to feed your eare With the choice dainties of his Theatre But I much feare he 'le not be easily wonne To leave his Bower where griefe and he alone Do spend their time to see how vainly wee Accept old toyes for a new Comedie Therefore repaire to him and praise each line Of his Vulpone Sejanus Cateline But stay and let me tell you where he is He sojournes in his Brome's Antipodes C. G. The Prologue OPinion which our Author cannot court For the deare daintinesse of it has of late From the old way of Playes possest a Sort Only to run to those that carry state In Scene magnificent and language high And Cloathes worth all the rest except the Action And such are only good those Leaders cry And into that beleefe draw on a Faction That must despise all sportive merry Wit Because some such great Play had none in it But it is knowne peace to their Memories The Poets late sublimed from our Age Who best could understand and best devise Workes that must ever live upon the Stage Did well approve and lead this humble way Which we are bound to travaile in to night And though it be not trac'd so well as They Discover'd it by true Phoebean light Pardon our just Ambition yet that strive To keep the weakest Branch o' th' Stage alive I meane the weakest in their great esteeme That count all slight that 's under us or nigh And only those for worthy Subjects deeme Fetch'd or reach'd at at least from farre or high When low and home-bred Subjects have their use As well as those fetch'd from on high or farre And 't is as hard a labour for the Muse To moove the Earth as to dislodge a Starre See yet those glorious Playes and let their sight Your Admiration moove these your Delight To the Author on his Comedy The Antipodes STeer'd by the hand of Fate ore swelling Seas Me thought I landed on th' Antipodes Where I was straight a Stranger For t is thus Their feet do tread against the tread of us My Scull mistooke thy Book being in my hand Hurried my Soule to th' Antipodian strand Where I did feast my Fancy and mine Eyes With such variety of Rarities That I perceive thy Muse frequents some shade Might be a Grove for a Pierian Maide Let Ideots prate it boots not what they say Th' Antipodes to Wit and Learning may Have ample Priv'ledge For among that crew I know there 's not a man can judge of You Rob. Chamberlain The Persons in the Play Blaze an Herauld Painter Joylesse an old Country Gentleman Hughball a Doctor of Physicke Barbara Wife to Blaze Martha Wife to Perigrine Letoy a Phantasticke Lord Quaylpipe his Curate Perigrine sonne to Joylesse Diana wife to Joylesse By-play a conceited servant to Letoy Trulocke a close friend to Letoy Followers of the Lord Letoyes who are Actors in the By-play The Antipodes Act. 1. Scene 1. Blaze Ioylesse TO me and to the City Sir you are welcome And so are all about you we have long Suffer'd in want of such faire Company But now that Times calamity has given way Thankes to high Providence to your kinder visits We are like halfe pin'd wretches that have lain Long on the plankes of sorrow strictly tyed To a forc'd abstinence from the sight of friends The sweetlier fild with joy Ioy. Alas I bring Sorrow too much with me to fill one house In the sad number of my family Bla. Be comforted good Sir my house which now You may be pleas'd to call your owne is large Enough to hold you all and for your sorrowes You came to lose 'hem And I hope the meanes Is readily at hand The Doctor 's comming Who as by Letters I advertis'd you Is the most promising man to cure your Sonne The Kingdome yields it will astonish you To heare the mervailes he hath done in cures Of such distracted ones as is your sonne And not so much by bodily Physicke no! He sends few Recipes to th' Apothecaries As medicine of the minde which he infuses So skilfully yet by familiar wayes That it begets both wonder and delight In his observers while the stupid patient Finds health at unawares Ioy. You speak well of him Yet I may feare my sonnes long growne disease Is such he hath not met with Bla. Then I le tell you Sir He cur'd a Country gentleman that fell mad For spending of his land before he sold it That is 't was sold to pay his debts All went That way for a dead horse as one would say He had not money left to buy his dinner Upon that whole-sale day This was a cause Might make a gentleman mad you 'll say and him It did as mad as land lesse Squire could bee This Doctor by his art remov'd his madnesse And mingled so much wit among his braines That by the over-flowing of it meerely He gets and spends five hundred pound a yeare now As merily as any Gentleman In Darby-shire I name