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B09153 Theatre of wits ancient and modern attended with severall other ingenious pieces from the same pen [brace] viz. I. Faenestra in pectore, or, A century of familiar letters, II. Loves labyrinth: A tragi-comedy, III. Fragmenta poetica, or, Poetical diversions, IV. Virtus redivivi, a panegyrick on our late king Charles of ever blessed memory concluding with A panegyrick on His Sacred Majesties most happy return / by T.F. Forde, Thomas. 1661 (1661) Wing F1548A; ESTC R177174 187,653 418

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high houses of four or five stories wherein commonly the uppermost room is worst furnished Lewis the 9th who in the Catalogue of the French Kings is call'd St. Lewis was Baptized in the little Town of Poyssy and after his return from Aegypt and other places against the Saracens being asked by what Title he would be distinguished from the rest of his Predecessors after his death He answered That he desired to be called Lewis of Poyssy Reply being made That there were divers other places and Cities of Renown where he had performed brave Exploits and obteined famous Victories therefore it was more fitting that some of those places should denominate him No said he I desire to be called Lewis of Poyssy because there I got the most glorious Victory that ever I had for there I overcame the Devil Meaning that he was Christned there Don Beltran de Rosa being to marry a rich Labradors a Yeomans daughter which was much importun'd by her Parents to the match because their Family should be thereby ennobled he being a Cavalier of St. Jago The young Maid having understood that Don Beltran had been in Naples and had that disease about him answered wittily Truly Sir To better my blood I will not hurt my flesh It was the answer of Vespasian to Apollonius desiring entrance and access for Dion and Euphrates two Philosophers My gates are always open to Philosophers but my very breast is open unto thee It is reported of Cosmo de Medici that having built a goodly Church with a Monastery thereunto annex'd and two Hospitals with other monuments of Piety and endow'd them with large Revenues as one did much magnifie him for these extraordinary works he answer'd 'T is true I imploy'd much treasure that way yet when I look over my Leiger-book of accounts I do not find that God Almighty is indebted to me one penny but I am still in the arrear to him It was a brave generous saying of a great Armenian-Merchant who having understood how a vessel of his was cast away wherein there was laden a rich Cargazon upon his sole account he strook his hand upon his breast and said My heart I thank God is still afloat my spirits shall not sink with my ship nor go an inch lower Sir Edward Herbert being Embassador in France there hapned some classings between him and the great French Favourite Luynes whereupon he was told that Luynes was his enemy and that he was not in a place of security there Sir Edward gallantly answered That he held himself to be in a place of Security wheresoever he had his sword by him FINIS Faenestra in Pector OR FAMILIAR LETTERS By THO. FORDE Quid melius desidiosus agam ALTVM 〈…〉 LONDON Printed by R. and W. Leybourn for William Grantham at the Black Bear in St. Pauls Church-yard neer the little North Door 1660. To the Reader Reader THe witty Lucian brings in Momus quarrelling at the Master-pieces which the gods had made and the onely fault he found with Man was That he had not a window to look into his breast For this reason I call this Packet of Letters Fenestra in Pectore Letters being the best Casements whereby men disclose themselves Judicium fit per Brachium say the Physicians and I know no better Interpreter of the Heart than the hand especially in Familiar Letters whereby friends mingle souls and make mutual discoveries of and to one another The pen like the pulse discovers our inward condition if it become faint or intermitting like the passing-bell it gives notice of the decay if not the departure of friendship which is the soul of humane Societie For these I have no better Apology than their publication their impudence if it be so bespeaking their innocence They desire to please all to injure none If you find some things in them that appear not calculated for the Meridian of the present times know that they are left but to shew what the whole piece might have been had my time and the times accorded they might then perhaps have given you some remarks of the miracles of our age But the Dutch Proverb tels me Who bringeth himself into needless dangers dieth the Devils martyr Nulli tacuisse nocet nocet esse loquutum And I very well remember that notable Apothegme of the famous though unfortunate Sir W. Raleigh Whosoever shall tell any great man or Magistrate that he is not just the General of an Army that he is not valiant and great Ladies that they are not fair shall never be made a Counsellour a Captain or a Courtier Thou wilt say it may be I had little to do to publish my follies to the world and I am contented thou shouldst think so if it may pass for my Apologie That I had little else to do If it be a crime the number of offenders in this kind is enough to authorize the fact and turn the guilt into a pardon if not a pass-port For they who write because all write have still That excuse for writing and for writing ill At this time I shall use no other nor trouble thee any farther Reader when I have subscribed the Author Thy Friend and Servant T. F. Familiar Letters To Mr. T. C. Sir AT my arrival here I finde all out of order though abounding with orders The King and Queen are departed which makes us all dead for what cause I cannot tell you unless it were for fear of the arrival of a stranger to this Kingdom and one that hath been long since banished from hence Nor durst shee appear now but that 't is Parliament-time She was landed at Westminster by the rout of Water-men when they frighted away the Bishops commig to the House of Commons door it was put to the Vote Whether she should come in or no The better part suspecting by her habit it was Rebellion they having seen her before in forreign parts would not admit her But the Major part carried it in the Affirmative and the five Members were appointed to entertain her which they did and some say she was placed in the Speakers Chair She came not in the Lords House they could not Brook it but I dare Say she had a Conference with some of them in the Painted Chamber Her Lodgings are provided in the City where she goes attired as necessary with a fair new cloak of Religion a Scotch Bonnet a French Doublet and Coats like Dutchmens Slops her hair red like an Irishmans neither Bands nor Cuffs for she indures no Linnen for spight of Lawn Sleeves unless a two or three Night-caps because they are of Holland You would wonder to see in what droves our Citizens flock after her did you not know it is their nature after strargers But I 'll follow her no farther lest you suspect me for one of her followers who am Sir Your Loyal Friend To Mr. T. C. Sir THe Fire is now broken out of the house and the sparks of sedition fly about the City
Doron for I cannot may not will not love thee Dor. Out you gossip not love me go get You spin on Ixions wheel Car. No Lovers spin on that and so must you Exeunt Scaen. 8. Enter Menaphon Men. How fond was I when I as vainly strove To keep my heart against the god of Love I little thought his power when I resolv'd To live and not to love Nature I see Cannot subsist without loves harmonie In vain I shut the door and bolted it With resolution strait the thief Thorough the casements of mine eyes got in And stole away my heart as once of old He serv'd the merry Greek Anacreon Whose fancie fits my fortune Here it is Loves Duel Cupid all his Arts did prove To invite my heart to love But I alwayes did delay His mild summons to obey Being deaf to all his charms Strait the god assumes his Arms. With his bow and quiver he Takes the field to Duel me Armed like Achilles I With my shield alone defie His bold challenge as he cast His golden darts I as fast Catch'd his Arrows in my shield Till I made him leave the field Fretting and disarmed then The angry god returns agen All in flames stead of a dart Throws himself into my heart Useless I my shield require When the Fort is all on fire I in vain the field did win Now the Enemy's within Thus betray'd at last I cry Love thou hast the victory Alas what heart 's so fortify'd to prove The sev'ral batteries of the god of love What ear 's not charm'd with th'rethorick of a voice Whose single note would silence all the Quire Of the Aërial feather'd Choristers What eye would not be blinded to behold Those eyes which cast a cloud upon the Sun And bring his light under disparagement Enter Sephestia Witness that face whose Shrine hath made me blind How fares my fairest guest Seph The better for Your courteous entertainment may the gods Be favourable to your flocks as you Have friendly been to us Men. May I presume To crave your name and to enquire how Hard-hearted fortune could be so unjust To injure innocence Signe she is blind Seph My name is Samela my parentage But mean the wife of a poor Gentleman Of Cyprus now deceas'd How arriv'd here Pray do not now enquire time may reveal What present sorrows force me to conceal Men. I will not press your yet fresh bleeding wounds With a rude hand 't is time and patience Must work the cure the gods allow a salve For ev'ry sore but we must wait on them Their time is best for when we strive to heal Our wounds too fast they do but fester more Rest here content a Country life is safe Fortune o're-looks our humble cottages We are not pain'd with wealth nor pin'd with want Our sheep do yield us milk for food and wooll To make us cloaths hunger cold we slight Envie hath here no place we 'l friendship keep Free from all jars and harmless as our sheep Sam. O happy life would I had never known Other than this which by comparison Renders mine odious to my memorie Exit weeping Men. Sorrow sits heavy on her heart but shews More lovely in her face those tears appear Like chrystal dew upon the blushing rose Beauty thus veil'd is more inviting than Shining out in it's unclouded splendor Fortune I hate thee for thy spight to her But thank thee for thy courtesie to me In sending her for shelter to my house Kind love assist me now and I will be Her constant servant and thy votarie Exit Finis Act. 2. Act. 3. Scaen. 1. Romanio and Eurilochus with Plusidippus Rom. THis present to the King of Thessaly Will gain us both reward and pardon too For all our former Pyracies upon His seas and ships Eur. Ay he hath ne're a son For to inherit the Thessalian Crown Hereby this lad may gain a Kingdom whilst We seek but our liberties and lives For time to come and pardon for what 's past This is the place the King doth oft frequent When publick cares oppress his Royal head Here he unloads the burthen of his thoughts And changes cares for recreation See where he comes God save your Majestie Rom. Long live Agenor King of Thessaly Enter King Kin. What meanes this bold intrusion who are ye That dare presume into our private walks Eur. Pardon great Sir we come not to offend Your sacred Majestie but to present Shews Plusidippus to the King You with this living gift Kin. This is a gift Indeed where had ye him or what 's his birth Rom. Please you dread Sir grant us your pardon then We shall declare unto you what we know Kin. Take it we freely pardon ye Now speak Eur. Then be it known unto your Majestie VVe the two famous Pyrats are you have So long laid wait to take but all in vain Roving upon the coasts of Arcady VVe found this beauteous youth upon the shore VVhom we suppose the seas had wrack't but sav'd His life which we have nourish'd ever since And now bequeath unto your Majestie For which we beg no recompence but this To seal our pardons for our former faults Kin. Look that for time to come ye honest be lives And for what 's past we freely pardon ye Rom. Thanks Royal Sir the remnant of our VVill we spend in your service and so give Again our lives which you have given us VVhen they were forfeit to your laws and you Exeunt Kin. This is a welcome gift VVhat a divine Beautie doth sparkle in his countenance Surely he cannot be of mortal race Descended but Jove himself hath sent him To be the happy heir of my Kingdom Immortal Jove I thank thee for this gift Thou couldest not have sent a welcomer My pretty lad where wer 't thou born canst tell Plu. I know not Sir my name is Plusidippus Kin. Come follow me now have I found at once An husband for my danghter an heir For the Thessalian Crown Thrones are supplied forth By Jove who when the root is withered Can make more heav'nly branches to sprout Which may in time grow mighty trees to shade And shelter all their liege-subjects under Exeunt Scaen. 2. Menaphon solus Strike home great Cupid with thy flaming dart As yet thou dost but dally with my heart 'T is rather scratch'd than wounded I do hate A luke-warm love give me a love flames high As it would reach the element of fire From whence it came a low and creeping flame Befits a chimney not a lovers breast Give me a love dare undertake a task VVould fright an Hercules into an ague A love dare tempt the boldest fate and die An honour'd captive or bold conquerour Give me a daring not a whining love A love grows great with opposition A love that scorns an easie task things great And noble always are most difficult This is the love blind Cupid I would have A love that brings home trophies or a