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and_o little_a spark_n if_o indeed_o it_o be_v of_o the_o spirit_n of_o god_n and_o not_o a_o gust_n either_o give_v by_o the_o devil_n or_o yet_o procure_v by_o ourselves_o though_o yet_o still_o one_o who_o have_v experience_n can_v possible_o but_o understand_v at_o the_o very_a instant_n that_o it_o be_v no_o such_o thing_n as_o can_v be_v acquire_v save_o that_o even_o in_o our_o very_a natural_a condition_n we_o be_v so_o greedy_a of_o all_o that_o which_o be_v savoury_a that_o we_o will_v needs_o taste_v of_o all_o but_o if_o as_o i_o say_v it_o be_v of_o the_o devil_n we_o quick_o grow_v again_o to_o be_v very_o cold_a and_o how_o much_o soever_o we_o ourselves_o may_v begin_v to_o make_v this_o fire_n also_o burn_v for_o the_o procure_n of_o this_o gust_n we_o seem_v to_o have_v indeed_o a_o mind_n to_o do_v no_o other_o business_n hereby_o then_o to_o cast-on_a water_n enough_o to_o quench_v it_o whereas_o if_o in_o very_a deed_n this_o little_a spark_n be_v of_o divine_a 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honour_n which_o be_v allow_v to_o other_o i_o consider_v the_o goodness_n of_o almighty_a god_n in_o not_o permit_v the_o soul_n even_o of_o that_o man_n to_o be_v defame_v but_o that_o it_o may_v be_v conceal_v that_o he_o be_v a_o enemy_n of_o he_o for_o my_o part_n i_o be_v even_o turn_v half_a fool_n by_o what_o i_o have_v see_v yet_o during_o all_o the_o performance_n of_o the_o office_n of_o the_o dead_a there_o be_v no_o more_o devil_n to_o be_v see_v but_o when_o afterward_o they_o put_v the_o body_n into_o the_o grave_n there_o be_v such_o a_o multitude_n of_o they_o ready_a to_o receive_v the_o body_n that_o i_o be_v even_o out_o of_o myself_o with_o behold_v it_o and_o it_o be_v no_o little_a courage_n which_o i_o need_v for_o enable_v i_o to_o dissemble_v the_o see_v it_o and_o i_o consider_v how_o those_o devil_n be_v likely_a to_o treat_v that_o soul_n when_o they_o exercise_v such_o a_o absolute_a dominion_n even_o over_o that_o woeful_a body_n and_o i_o will_v to_o 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such_o person_n as_o be_v dead_a i_o will_v also_o declare_v some_o thing_n concern_v some_o other_o kind_n of_o soul_n which_o our_o lord_n have_v be_v please_v that_o i_o shall_v see_v but_o i_o will_v speak_v only_o of_o few_o both_o to_o be_v the_o short_a and_o because_o it_o will_v not_o be_v necessary_a to_o say_v much_o in_o order_n to_o the_o receive_n of_o benefit_n thereby_o they_o tell_v i_o once_o that_o a_o certain_a man_n be_v dead_a who_o have_v be_v provincial_a of_o his_o order_n but_o when_o he_o die_v he_o be_v provincial_a of_o another_o province_n now_o i_o have_v communicate_v much_o with_o this_o man_n and_o have_v be_v oblige_v to_o he_o for_o some_o good_a office_n which_o he_o have_v do_v i_o this_o man_n be_v of_o much_o &_o many_o virtue_n but_o yet_o when_o i_o come_v to_o know_v that_o he_o be_v dead_a i_o be_v great_o trouble_v at_o it_o because_o i_o be_v in_o fear_n and_o doubt_v of_o his_o salvation_n in_o regard_n that_o he_o have_v be_v a_o 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to_o i_o to_o be_v but_o of_o thirty_o year_n old_a or_o rather_o somewhat_o less_o but_o with_o much_o brightness_n in_o his_o face_n this_o vision_n pass_v away_o very_o speedy_o but_o yet_o i_o be_v so_o extreme_o comfort_v by_o it_o that_o the_o death_n of_o that_o man_n do_v put_v i_o now_o to_o no_o more_o pain_n though_o i_o have_v trouble_v many_o other_o about_o he_o for_o he_o be_v very_o well_o belove_v and_o thus_o also_o the_o comfort_n of_o my_o soul_n be_v so_o great_a i_o can_v not_o possible_o doubt_v but_o that_o the_o vision_n be_v true_a and_o no_o illusion_n this_o happen_v but_o fifteen_o day_n after_o his_o death_n but_o still_o i_o be_v not_o slack_a in_o procure_v that_o he_o may_v be_v recommend_v to_o almighty_a god_n save_o that_o i_o can_v not_o do_v it_o so_o hearty_o as_o before_o i_o see_v this_o vision_n for_o when_o our_o lord_n show_v i_o such_o thing_n and_o that_o yet_o i_o will_v pray_v for_o they_o afterward_o i_o can_v choose_v but_o conceive_v 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she_o do_v not_o well_o consider_v that_o she_o have_v not_o yet_o mew_v all_o her_o own_o sick-feather_n she_o may_v well_o step_n out_o of_o her_o nest_n yea_o and_o almighty_a god_n himself_o will_n perhaps_o take_v she_o now_o and_o then_o out_o from_o thence_o but_o she_o be_v not_o yet_o fit_a for_o a_o flight_n because_o her_o virtue_n be_v not_o yet_o grow_v to_o be_v of_o full_a strength_n nor_o have_v she_o yet_o experience_n for_o the_o knowledge_n of_o danger_n nor_o do_v she_o yet_o understand_v the_o mischief_n which_o grow_v by_o put_v too_o much_o trust_v in_o her_o own_o force_n and_o now_o this_o be_v that_o which_o destroy_v i_o and_o both_o for_o this_o and_o for_o all_o thing_n there_o will_v be_v great_a necessity_n of_o a_o director_n and_o of_o conversation_n with_o person_n who_o be_v spiritual_a indeed_o it_o be_v true_a i_o be_o full_o persuade_v that_o when_o almighty_a god_n do_v once_o bring_v a_o soul_n to_o this_o state_n he_o will_v not_o leave_v to_o 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which_o he_o have_v do_v we_o as_o to_o make_v we_o be_v punish_v for_o they_o but_o that_o rather_o they_o will_v help_v to_o obtain_v pardon_n for_o we_o so_o much_o the_o soon_o as_o for_o person_n who_o have_v belong_v to_o his_o house_n and_o have_v have_v the_o honour_n to_o eat_v as_o man_n use_v to_o say_v of_o his_o bread_n let_v they_o remember_v his_o word_n and_o consider_v how_o he_o have_v proceed_v with_o i_o who_o even_o weary_v myself_o with_o offend_v his_o divine_a majesty_n before_o he_o will_v forbear_v or_o fail_v to_o pardon_v i_o for_o he_o never_o grow_v unwilling_a to_o give_v nor_o be_v it_o ever_o possible_a to_o draw_v his_o mercy_n dry_a and_o so_o let_v not_o we_o be_v weary_a of_o ever_o receive_v favour_n at_o his_o hand_n let_v he_o be_v bless_v for_o ever_o amen_n and_o let_v all_o creature_n praise_v he_o the_o twenty_o chapter_n wherein_o she_o treat_v of_o the_o difference_n between_a union_n and_o rapt_v and_o declare_v what_o kind_n of_o thing_n 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the_o middle_n and_o in_o the_o end_n and_o it_o be_v always_o in_o the_o interior_a part_n but_o now_o as_o rapt_n be_v visitation_n of_o the_o soul_n which_o use_v to_o be_v of_o a_o high_a strain_n they_o be_v wont_n to_o produce_v their_o effect_n not_o only_o interiorly_a but_o exterior_o also_o i_o humble_o beseech_v our_o bless_a lord_n that_o as_o he_o have_v vouchsafe_v to_o declare_v the_o rest_n so_o he_o will_v also_o vouchsafe_v to_o do_v this_o for_o certain_o if_o his_o divine_a majesty_n have_v not_o be_v please_v to_o give_v i_o to_o understand_v by_o what_o mean_n &_o in_o what_o manner_n it_o may_v be_v do_v i_o shall_v not_o possible_o have_v know_v which_o way_n to_o turn_v my_o hand_n let_v we_o therefore_o now_o consider_v that_o this_o last_o water_n whereof_o we_o have_v speak_v be_v so_o very_o plentiful_a and_o abundant_a that_o if_o it_o be_v not_o because_o the_o soil_n of_o the_o garden_n can_v consent_v to_o receive_v it_o we_o may_v believe_v that_o the_o very_a cloud_n itself_o of_o that_o great_a majesty_n be_v here_o rain_v itself_o down_o upon_o this_o earth_n and_o so_o when_o we_o be_v grateful_a to_o our_o lord_n for_o this_o great_a blessing_n acknowledge_v the_o same_o by_o our_o good_a work_n according_a to_o the_o uttermost_a of_o our_o power_n our_o lord_n catches-up_a rapt_n that_o soul_n as_o a_o man_n may_v say_v even_o just_a so_o as_o the_o cloud_n snatch_v up_o the_o vapour_n from_o the_o earth_n and_o so_o take_v she_o whole_o up_o from_o the_o same_o earth_n the_o cloud_n rise_v up_o to_o heaven_n and_o carry_v the_o same_o along_o with_o itself_o and_o show_v her_o certain_a thing_n belong_v to_o that_o kingdom_n which_o be_v prepare_v for_o she_o i_o know_v not_o whether_o this_o comparison_n will_v be_v think_v to_o suit_n well_o with_o that_o whereof_o i_o be_o speak_v but_o i_o be_o sure_a that_o in_o reality_n of_o truth_n it_o pass_v thus_o in_o these_o rapt_n it_o do_v not_o seem_v that_o the_o soul_n do_v even_o animate_v the_o body_n and_o so_o the_o body_n itself_o remain_v with_o a_o kind_n of_o trouble_n and_o defect_n through_o the_o want_n of_o that_o natural_a heat_n which_o belong_v to_o it_o and_o it_o go_v all_o cool_a itself_o though_o yet_o with_o a_o excessive_a sweetness_n and_o delight_n there_o be_v here_o no_o mean_n at_o all_o to_o resist_v though_o in_o union_n we_o be_v then_o as_o in_o our_o own_o country_n there_o be_v some_o remedy_n and_o so_o though_o it_o be_v not_o without_o suffer_v a_o kind_n of_o pain_n and_o use_v some_o force_n it_o may_v always_o in_o effect_n be_v employ_v but_o here_o for_o the_o most_o part_n there_o be_v no_o remedy_n at_o all_o nor_o any_o help_n but_o many_o time_n the_o thing_n arrive_v without_o our_o be_v so_o much_o as_o able_a to_o prevent_v the_o come_n of_o it_o even_o by_o our_o very_a thought_n and_o there_o grow_v to_o be_v such_o a_o speedy_a and_o strong_a kind_n of_o impetuositie_n that_o you_o feel_v and_o find_v this_o cloud_n to_o raise_v itself_o instant_o up_o or_o rather_o that_o this_o strong_a eagle_n take_v you_o and_o carry_v you_o quite_o away_o between_o her_o wing_n and_o i_o say_v it_o be_v understand_v and_o you_o find_v yourself_o to_o be_v carry_v away_o though_o you_o know_v not_o whither_o for_o howsoever_o the_o thing_n happen_v to_o be_v with_o delight_n yet_o so_o great_a be_v the_o weakness_n of_o our_o natural_a condition_n that_o it_o put_v we_o into_o some_o fear_n in_o the_o beginning_n and_o therefore_o it_o will_v be_v necessary_a in_o this_o case_n for_o the_o soul_n to_o be_v much_o more_o courageous_a and_o resolute_a then_o for_o all_o those_o occasion_n which_o be_v precedent_n for_o here_o she_o must_v be_v content_a to_o hazard_v all_o and_o to_o leave_v herself_o whole_o in_o the_o hand_n of_o almighty_a god_n and_o to_o go_v whithersoever_o she_o shall_v be_v carry_v and_o this_o with_o a_o very_a good_a will_n for_o in_o fine_a they_o will_v be_v sure_a to_o carry_v she_o whether_o she_o will_v or_o no_o and_o that_o with_o so_o great_a extremity_n of_o strength_n and_o speed_n that_o howsoever_o i_o have_v a_o mind_n very_o very_o often_o to_o resist_v it_o yea_o and_o that_o i_o employ_v all_o the_o strength_n i_o have_v to_o that_o purpose_n and_o especial_o at_o some_o particular_a time_n when_o thing_n fall_v out_o to_o happen_v in_o public_a yea_o and_o at_o many_o other_o time_n also_o when_o they_o be_v private_a for_o i_o be_v then_o in_o doubt_n and_o fear_v lest_o i_o may_v be_v abuse_v and_o deceive_v it_o be_v yet_o but_o seldom_o that_o i_o be_v able_a to_o prevail_v to_o some_o small_a proportion_n but_o it_o cost_v
the_o matter_n be_v that_o when_o these_o thing_n be_v of_o the_o devil_n it_o seem_v as_o if_o all_o kind_n of_o benediction_n do_v hide_v itself_o and_o even_o fly_v from_o the_o soul_n so_o untoward_a and_o unquiet_a and_o in_o so_o great_a disorder_n do_v she_o remain_v without_o any_o one_o good_a effect_n at_o all_o for_o though_o there_o may_v be_v a_o seem_a as_o if_o there_o be_v a_o plant_n of_o good_a desire_n in_o she_o yet_o they_o be_v not_o effectual_a or_o strong_a the_o humility_n which_o he_o leave_v behind_o he_o be_v false_a unquiet_a and_o without_o any_o suavitie_n at_o all_o and_o i_o think_v this_o may_v be_v easy_o enough_o understand_v by_o any_o creature_n who_o have_v experience_n of_o what_o a_o good_a spirit_n be_v but_o yet_o the_o devil_n be_v very_o able_a to_o play_v many_o trick_n and_o therefore_o there_o be_v nothing_o of_o this_o kind_n so_o certain_a and_o clear_a but_o that_o somewhat_o may_v still_o be_v fear_v at_o his_o hand_n and_o so_o it_o will_v ever_o be_v well_o do_v to_o proceed_v with_o caution_n and_o advice_n and_o to_o have_v a_o director_n who_o may_v be_v learned_a and_o to_o conceal_v nothing_o from_o he_o and_o so_o the_o party_n shall_v be_v sure_a to_o take_v no_o hurt_n though_o yet_o i_o have_v have_v my_o part_n thereof_o through_o the_o excessive_a fear_n to_o which_o some_o of_o they_o be_v subject_a in_o particular_a it_o happen_v to_o i_o once_o that_o many_o person_n meet_v together_o in_o who_o i_o have_v belief_n enough_o and_o there_o be_v reason_n that_o i_o shall_v have_v it_o and_o though_o i_o proceed_v herein_o after_o the_o manner_n of_o entire_a confidence_n but_o with_o one_o yet_o when_o he_o command_v i_o i_o speak_v also_o with_o other_o they_o treat_v much_o about_o find_v remedy_n for_o all_o my_o inconvenience_n for_o they_o love_v i_o very_o much_o and_o i_o doubt_v that_o i_o may_v perhaps_o be_v deceive_v and_o i_o be_v also_o subject_a to_o extreme_a fear_n whensoever_o i_o be_v not_o in_o prayer_n for_o when_o i_o be_v and_o when_o our_o lord_n vouchsafe_v to_o do_v i_o any_o favour_n therein_o i_o grow_v present_o into_o good_a assurance_n and_o i_o think_v they_o be_v five_o or_o six_o of_o they_o and_o they_o be_v all_o great_a servant_n of_o almighty_a god_n but_o then_o my_o ghostly_a father_n tell_v i_o that_o they_o encounter_n all_o have_v grow_v to_o resolve_v that_o it_o be_v the_o devil_n and_o direct_v i_o not_o to_o communicate_v so_o often_o and_o that_o i_o shall_v endeavour_v to_o divert_v myself_o in_o such_o sort_n as_o that_o i_o may_v not_o be_v much_o alone_a now_o i_o be_v extreme_o timorous_a in_o these_o case_n as_o i_o have_v say_v and_o the_o palpitation_n of_o my_o hart_n help_v i_o on_o therein_o so_o that_o i_o have_v not_o the_o courage_n many_o time_n to_o be_v alone_o in_o my_o room_n even_o by_o day_n but_o when_o i_o find_v what_o so_o many_o of_o they_o affirm_v which_o yet_o i_o can_v by_o no_o mean_n believe_v i_o grow_v to_o have_v a_o extreme_a scruple_n as_o conceave_a that_o this_o be_v a_o sign_n of_o very_o little_a humility_n in_o myself_o since_o they_o all_o be_v incomparable_o of_o better_a life_n than_o i_o and_o beside_o all_o this_o they_o be_v learn_v and_o in_o fine_a why_o shall_v not_o i_o believe_v they_o i_o force_v myself_o the_o best_a i_o can_v to_o do_v it_o and_o i_o think_v much_o of_o my_o own_o wicked_a life_n and_o how_o consider_v that_o it_o may_v be_v likely_a enough_o to_o be_v true_a which_o they_o say_v upon_o this_o i_o go_v into_o the_o church_n with_o this_o affliction_n and_o pass_v on_o into_o a_o oratory_n have_v forbear_v many_o day_n to_o communicate_v and_o avoid_v also_o to_o be_v alone_o which_o yet_o have_v former_o be_v my_o total_a comfort_n and_o all_o this_o without_o have_v one_o person_n with_o who_o i_o may_v treat_v for_o they_o be_v all_o against_o i_o nay_o some_o of_o they_o i_o think_v make_v themselves_o as_o it_o be_v merry_a with_o i_o whensoever_o i_o will_v be_v tell_v they_o what_o i_o think_v and_o other_o will_v be_v advise_v my_o ghostly_a father_n to_o take_v heed_n of_o i_o nay_o some_o will_v go_v so_o far_o as_o to_o say_v that_o it_o be_v clear_o the_o devil_n only_o my_o ghostly_a father_n though_o he_o conform_v himself_o with_o those_o other_o as_o i_o grow_v to_o understand_v afterward_o so_o far_o as_o to_o have_v i_o try_v do_v ever_o give_v i_o comfort_n and_o tell_v i_o that_o though_o it_o shall_v be_v the_o devil_n yet_o i_o not_o offend_v almighty_a god_n he_o will_v be_v able_a to_o do_v i_o no_o hurt_n that_o the_o difficulty_n will_v grow_v to_o be_v remove_v that_o in_o the_o mean_a time_n i_o shall_v pray_v hearty_o to_o almighty_a god_n and_o that_o he_o and_o all_o those_o other_o and_o many_o more_o also_o than_o they_o will_v do_v the_o like_a and_o all_o my_o prayer_n and_o they_o who_o i_o conceive_v to_o be_v the_o servant_n of_o almighty_a god_n aim_v at_o this_o that_o his_o divine_a majesty_n will_v be_v please_v to_o carry_v i_o on_o by_o some_o other_o way_n and_o this_o kind_n of_o make_v continual_a intercession_n to_o our_o lord_n may_v last_v about_o a_o matter_n of_o some_o two_o year_n as_o for_o i_o i_o be_v capable_a of_o no_o comfort_n when_o i_o think_v once_o that_o it_o be_v possible_a for_o the_o devil_n to_o be_v so_o often_o speak_v to_o i_o and_o in_o i_o but_o in_o regard_n that_o now_o i_o employ_v no_o more_o hour_n of_o my_o time_n in_o solitude_n for_o prayer_n our_o lord_n give_v i_o recollection_n even_o when_o i_o be_v in_o conversation_n and_o so_o as_o that_o i_o be_v not_o able_a to_o avoid_v it_o and_o he_o say_v such_o thing_n to_o i_o as_o he_o please_v and_o i_o in_o the_o mean_a time_n be_v trouble_v that_o i_o be_v fain_o to_o hear_v he_o but_o once_o be_v all_o alone_a without_o have_v any_o creature_n by_o i_o upon_o who_o to_o ease_v myself_o i_o can_v neither_o pray_v nor_o read_v but_o be_v like_o a_o person_n even_o all_o amaze_v at_o so_o great_a tribulation_n as_o i_o endure_v and_o with_o so_o much_o fear_n to_o consider_v whether_o the_o devil_n be_v to_o have_v power_n to_o circumvent_v i_o in_o this_o manner_n or_o no._n and_o be_v all_o disorder_a and_o even_o tire_v without_o know_v what_o to_o do_v with_o myself_o for_o i_o have_v see_v myself_o in_o this_o affliction_n and_o that_o very_a often_o though_o yet_o never_o to_o my_o think_n in_o so_o great_a extremity_n as_o then_o i_o remain_v four_o or_o five_o hour_n after_o this_o manner_n for_o there_o seem_v to_o be_v no_o comfort_n at_o all_o for_o i_o either_o upon_o earth_n or_o yet_o from_o heaven_n but_o our_o lord_n leave_v i_o so_o in_o sufferance_n and_o under_o the_o fear_n also_o of_o a_o thousand_o danger_n o_o my_o dear_a lord_n and_o how_o true_o be_v thou_o a_o true_a friend_n and_o how_o powerful_a be_v thou_o to_o do_v what_o thou_o will_v and_o do_v never_o leave_v to_o love_v they_o who_o love_v thou_o if_o they_o love_v thou_o indeed_o let_v all_o thing_n praise_v thou_o o_o thou_o lord_n of_o the_o whole_a world_n and_o o_o that_o i_o can_v cry_v out_o loud_a enough_o through_o that_o whole_a world_n to_o declare_v how_o faithful_a and_o true_a thou_o be_v to_o thy_o friend_n all_o other_o thing_n grow_v to_o fail_v we_o but_o thou_o who_o be_v the_o lord_n of_o they_o all_o do_v never_o fail_v and_o it_o be_v little_a also_o which_o thou_o permit_v such_o as_o love_v thou_o to_o suffer_v for_o thou_o o_o my_o dear_a lord_n how_o delicate_o and_o how_o smooth_o yea_o and_o how_o savoury_o also_o do_v thou_o know_v how_o to_o treat_v such_o soul_n o_o that_o a_o creature_n who_o i_o know_v have_v be_v so_o happy_a as_o never_o to_o have_v detain_v herself_o upon_o love_v any_o other_o thing_n then_o thou_o it_o seem_v indeed_o o_o lord_n that_o sometime_o thou_o trye_v such_o as_o love_v thou_o with_o a_o kind_n of_o rigour_n to_o the_o end_n that_o by_o that_o extremity_n of_o trouble_n they_o may_v afterward_o come_v the_o better_o to_o find_v and_o feel_v thereby_o the_o great_a excess_n of_o thy_o love_n o_o my_o god_n that_o i_o have_v understanding_n and_o learning_n yea_o and_o new_a word_n so_o to_o be_v able_a to_o exaggerate_v thy_o work_n according_a to_o that_o intelligence_n which_o my_o soul_n have_v thereof_o all_o this_o be_v want_v to_o i_o o_o my_o dear_a lord_n but_o yet_o if_o thou_o forsake_v i_o not_o i_o will_v never_o be_v want_v to_o thou_o let_v all_o the_o learned_a man_n of_o the_o world_n rise-up_a against_o
i_o still_o desire_v to_o recover_v my_o health_n though_o yet_o i_o endure_v my_o sickness_n with_o great_a alacrity_n and_o i_o will_v be_v think_v and_o consider_v sometime_o that_o if_o by_o enjoy_v my_o health_n i_o may_v chance_v be_v damn_v it_o will_v be_v better_o for_o i_o to_o remain_v still_o as_o sick_a as_o i_o be_v but_o howsoever_o i_o conceive_v that_o i_o shall_v be_v able_a to_o serve_v almighty_a god_n much_o better_o if_o i_o can_v enjoy_v my_o health_n now_o this_o be_v the_o abuse_n and_o error_n which_o deceive_v we_o not_o to_o resign_v ourselves_o entire_o to_o the_o disposition_n and_o good_a pleasure_n of_o our_o lord_n who_o know_v best_a what_o be_v fit_a for_o us._n but_o in_o the_o mean_a time_n i_o get_v many_o mass_n say_v for_o this_o purpose_n and_o i_o resort_v also_o to_o the_o use_n of_o other_o solid_a and_o approve_a prayer_n for_o i_o be_v never_o a_o friend_n of_o certain_a odd_a devotion_n which_o be_v use_v by_o diverse_a person_n and_o especial_o by_o woman_n with_o some_o odd_a ceremony_n which_o i_o can_v never_o endure_v since_o i_o understand_v that_o they_o savour_v of_o superstition_n howsoever_o other_o folk_n be_v move_v by_o they_o and_o so_o i_o take_v for_o my_o advocate_n and_o lord_n the_o glorious_a s._n joseph_n and_o i_o recommend_v myself_o much_o to_o he_o and_o i_o have_v see_v clear_o that_o this_o father_n and_o lord_n of_o i_o have_v draw_v i_o as_o well_o out_o of_o this_o necessity_n as_o out_o of_o other_o great_a when_o there_o be_v question_n of_o honour_n and_o loss_n of_o the_o soul_n and_o that_o with_o more_o benefit_n and_o advantage_n then_o even_o myself_o can_v tell_v how_o to_o desire_v nay_o i_o can_v remember_v that_o hitherto_o i_o ever_o desire_v any_o thing_n by_o his_o mean_n which_o he_o have_v fail_v to_o obtain_v for_o i_o and_o it_o be_v able_a even_o to_o amaze_v i_o when_o i_o consider_v the_o great_a favour_n which_o almighty_a god_n have_v do_v i_o by_o mean_n of_o this_o bless_a saint_n and_o the_o danger_n both_o of_o body_n and_o soul_n out_o of_o which_o he_o have_v deliver_v i_o in_o such_o sort_n as_o that_o it_o seem_v our_o lord_n have_v give_v the_o grace_n and_o power_n to_o other_o saint_n to_o succour_v man_n in_o some_o one_o kind_n of_o necessity_n of_o they_o but_o i_o find_v by_o good_a experience_n that_o this_o glorious_a saint_n succour_v we_o in_o they_o all_o and_o that_o our_o lord_n will_v make_v we_o understand_v that_o as_o he_o will_v be_v subject_a to_o s._n joseph_n upon_o earth_n and_o that_o by_o enjoy_v the_o name_n of_o his_o father_n and_o by_o be_v as_o it_o be_v his_o director_n and_o tutor_n he_o may_v command_v he_o so_o also_o he_o will_v now_o in_o heaven_n grant_v whatsoever_o this_o saint_n shall_v desire_v this_o truth_n have_v also_o be_v see_v by_o the_o experience_n of_o other_o who_o i_o have_v desire_v to_o recommend_v themselves_o to_o this_o saint_n and_o now_o many_o be_v grow_v to_o be_v devote_a to_o he_o and_o myself_o also_o have_v fresh_a experience_n of_o this_o truth_n for_o my_o part_n i_o procure_v to_o celebrate_v his_o festivitie_n with_o all_o the_o solemnity_n i_o be_v able_a to_o use_v but_o yet_o with_o more_o vanity_n then_o true_a spirit_n desire_v that_o it_o may_v be_v perform_v with_o much_o curiosity_n and_o exactness_n though_o yet_o still_o with_o good_a intention_n but_o i_o ever_o have_v this_o of_o ill_a that_o if_o our_o lord_n enable_v i_o at_o any_o time_n to_o do_v any_o thing_n which_o be_v good_a it_o will_v be_v full_a of_o imperfection_n and_o fault_n whereas_o towards_o the_o do_v any_o thing_n amiss_o and_o for_o the_o exercise_v of_o curiosity_n and_o vanity_n i_o use_v much_o diligence_n and_o dexterity_n and_o cunning_a our_o lord_n pardon_v i_o for_o it_o and_o now_o i_o will_v fain_o persuade_v all_o the_o world_n to_o be_v devote_a to_o this_o glorious_a saint_n for_o the_o great_a experience_n which_o i_o have_v have_v of_o the_o blessing_n that_o he_o obtain_v for_o we_o of_o almighty_a god_n nay_o i_o have_v never_o know_v any_o one_o who_o be_v serious_o devote_a to_o he_o and_o perform_v he_o particular_a service_n who_o i_o find_v not_o also_o to_o go_v proceed_v on_o in_o virtue_n for_o real_o he_o assist_v those_o soul_n much_o which_o recommend_v themselves_o to_o he_o and_o to_o my_o best_a remembrance_n there_o be_v diverse_a year_n wherein_o i_o have_v desire_v somewhat_o of_o he_o upon_o his_o festival_n day_n and_o i_o have_v ever_o find_v it_o grant_v and_o if_o peradventure_o my_o petition_n have_v some_o little_a of_o the_o indirect_a belong_v to_o it_o he_o redress_v it_o and_o set_v it_o straight_o for_o my_o great_a good_a if_o i_o be_v any_o such_o person_n as_o have_v authority_n to_o write_v i_o will_v glad_o enlarge_v myself_o here_o to_o make_v particular_a relation_n of_o the_o favour_n which_o this_o glorious_a saint_n have_v obtain_v both_o for_o i_o and_o other_o but_o to_o the_o end_n that_o i_o may_v do_v no_o more_o than_o i_o be_o command_v i_o must_v be_v short_a in_o many_o thing_n than_o i_o will_v and_o more_o large_a in_o other_o then_o be_v needful_a like_o one_o in_o fine_a who_o have_v little_a discretion_n for_o the_o do_v of_o any_o thing_n which_o be_v good_a only_o i_o beg_v for_o the_o love_n of_o almighty_a god_n that_o whosoever_o can_v believe_v i_o will_v try_v the_o truth_n of_o what_o i_o say_v for_o he_o shall_v find_v by_o experience_n how_o great_o a_o good_a thing_n it_o be_v to_o recommend_v himself_o to_o this_o glorious_a patriarch_n and_o to_o be_v devote_a to_o he_o especial_o such_o as_o give_v themselves_o to_o prayer_n shall_v always_o be_v affectionate_a to_o this_o saint_n for_o i_o know_v not_o how_o one_o can_v think_v of_o the_o queen_n of_o the_o angel_n at_o those_o time_n when_o she_o suffer_v so_o much_o during_o the_o infancy_n of_o our_o lord_n jesus_n and_o not_o give_v thanks_n to_o s._n joseph_n for_o the_o great_a assistance_n which_o he_o give_v they_o at_o that_o time_n whosoever_o want_v a_o master_n who_o may_v instruct_v he_o to_o pray_v let_v he_o take_v this_o glorious_a saint_n for_o his_o guide_n and_o he_o shall_v never_o loose_v his_o way_n i_o beseech_v our_o lord_n that_o i_o may_v have_v commit_v no_o error_n in_o presume_v to_o speak_v of_o this_o saint_n for_o though_o i_o thus_o profess_v and_o publish_v myself_o to_o be_v devote_a to_o he_o yet_o have_v i_o be_v ever_o faulty_a in_o the_o not_o do_v he_o real_a service_n and_o in_o not_o imitate_v his_o virtue_n but_o now_o he_o do_v like_o himself_o by_o procure_v that_o i_o may_v be_v able_a to_o rise_v and_o walk_v and_o be_v no_o long_o a_o cripple_n and_o so_o i_o do_v also_o like_o myself_o in_o make_v so_o ill_o use_v of_o this_o favour_n but_o now_o who_o will_v ever_o have_v imagine_v that_o i_o can_v so_o soon_o fall_v back_o again_o after_o my_o receive_n so_o many_o regalo_n at_o the_o hand_n of_o almighty_a god_n and_o after_o his_o divine_a majesty_n have_v vouchsafe_v to_o give_v i_o some_o virtue_n which_o even_o as_o it_o be_v of_o themselves_o do_v awake_a and_o stir_v i_o up_o to_o his_o service_n and_o after_o i_o have_v see_v myself_o even_o as_o it_o be_v dead_a and_o in_o so_o imminent_a danger_n to_o be_v condemn_v to_o hell_n and_o after_o he_o have_v raise_v i_o again_o both_o in_o body_n and_o soul_n in_o such_o sort_n that_o all_o they_o who_o see_v i_o be_v even_o amaze_v to_o find_v that_o i_o can_v so_o long_o be_v alive_a but_o what_o be_v this_o o_o my_o lord_n and_o my_o god_n be_v this_o life_n to_o be_v still_o so_o dangerous_a which_o we_o be_v to_o live_v even_o now_o whilst_o i_o be_o write_v this_o i_o think_v that_o by_o this_o favour_n and_o mercy_n i_o may_v be_v able_a to_o say_v with_o s._n paul_n though_o yet_o not_o with_o such_o perfection_n as_o he_o say_v it_o that_o now_o it_o be_v not_o i_o who_o live_v but_o thou_o o_o my_o creator_n who_o live_v in_o i_o according_a to_o the_o experience_n which_o i_o have_v have_v some_o year_n by_o that_o little_a which_o i_o be_o able_a to_o understand_v of_o myself_o and_o still_o thou_o hold_v and_o keep_v thy_o hand_n over_o i_o and_o i_o find_v myself_o full_a of_o desire_n and_o good_a purpose_n and_o in_o some_o sort_n i_o have_v prove_v also_o even_o by_o experience_n of_o many_o thing_n in_o these_o late_a year_n that_o i_o will_v by_o no_o mean_n do_v any_o thing_n which_o shall_v contradict_v or_o cross_v thy_o will_n how_o little_a soever_o it_o may_v be_v though_o yet_o i_o well_o believe_v that_o i_o
who_o we_o know_v we_o be_v belove_v and_o as_o for_o you_o if_o you_o love_v he_o not_o yet_o for_o to_o the_o end_n that_o it_o may_v be_v a_o true_a love_n and_o that_o your_o friendship_n may_v last_v the_o condition_n must_v be_v reciprocal_a and_o we_o know_v there_o can_v be_v no_o want_n on_o our_o lord_n behalf_n and_o that_o our_o nature_n be_v vicious_a sensual_a and_o ungrateful_a and_o so_o we_o can_v perhaps_o obtain_v full_o at_o our_o own_o hand_n to_o love_v he_o so_o much_o because_o he_o be_v not_o of_o the_o same_o condition_n with_o we_o yet_o consider_v how_o much_o it_o import_v we_o to_o hold_v friendship_n with_o he_o and_o how_o much_o he_o love_v we_o we_o must_v pass_v on_o and_o pass_v over_o this_o pain_n of_o be_v much_o in_o his_o company_n who_o be_v of_o so_o different_a a_o condition_n from_o we_o o_o infinite_a goodness_n of_o my_o god_n how_o true_a it_o be_v that_o i_o think_v i_o see_v both_o thou_o and_o myself_o in_o this_o very_a manner_n o_o thou_o who_o be_v the_o very_a regalo_n of_o the_o angel_n in_o heaven_n how_o fain_o will_v i_o even_o defeat_v and_o dissolve_v myself_o total_o in_o love_v thou_o when_o i_o see_v and_o consider_v these_o thing_n and_o how_o certain_a a_o thing_n it_o be_v that_o thou_o be_v on_o the_o suffer_a hand_n in_o regard_n of_o such_o as_o will_v not_o suffer_v thou_o to_o remain_v with_o they_o o_o how_o good_a a_o friend_n do_v thou_o make_v thyself_o to_o thy_o friend_n o_o my_o lord_n and_o how_o do_v thou_o go_v endure_v he_o and_o regal_v he_o and_o thou_o expect_v till_o he_o make_v himself_o grow_v to_o be_v of_o thy_o condition_n and_o inclination_n and_o in_o the_o mean_a time_n thou_o endure_v and_o permit_v he_o to_o continue_v to_o be_v a_o while_n of_o his_o own_o and_o thou_o take_v o_o my_o dear_a lord_n by_o way_n of_o good_a payment_n those_o fit_n of_o time_n which_o he_o can_v be_v content_a to_o bestow_v upon_o thou_o and_o upon_o a_o minute_n of_o true_a sorrow_n and_o repentance_n thou_o forget_v all_o those_o sin_n whereby_o he_o have_v offend_v thou_o all_o this_o have_v i_o perceive_v clear_o in_o order_n to_o myself_o and_o for_o my_o part_n i_o can_v see_v o_o my_o creator_n how_o the_o whole_a world_n can_v forbear_v to_o procure_v to_o draw_v near_o to_o thy_o divine_a majesty_n that_o so_o it_o may_v be_v able_a to_o obtain_v this_o particular_a kind_n of_o friendship_n with_o thou_o such_o as_o be_v wicked_a and_o be_v not_o hitherto_o come_v to_o have_v the_o like_a inclination_n and_o disposition_n to_o thou_o shall_v yet_o come_v towards_o thou_o to_o the_o end_n that_o so_o thou_o may_v make_v they_o good_a and_o that_o they_o may_v endure_v thou_o to_o be_v with_o they_o though_o it_o be_v but_o for_o some_o two_o hour_n in_o the_o day_n yea_o even_o though_o they_o will_v not_o the_o while_n stay_v in_o thy_o company_n without_o a_o thousand_o distraction_n and_o tumbling_n up_o and_o down_o in_o wordly_a care_n and_o thought_n as_o i_o be_v wont_a to_o do_v and_o for_o recompense_n of_o this_o violence_n which_o they_o use_v to_o make_v against_o themselves_o by_o continue_v in_o so_o good_a company_n as_o thou_o for_o neither_o in_o those_o very_a beginning_n no_o nor_o even_o afterward_o also_o for_o a_o while_n can_v they_o tell_v how_o to_o do_v better_o thou_o force_v o_o lord_n the_o devil_n of_o hell_n to_o forbear_v a_o set_v fierce_o upon_o they_o and_o permit_v they_o to_o have_v daily_o less_o power_n than_o other_o against_o they_o yea_o and_o thou_o put_v they_o into_o man_n hand_n that_o they_o may_v overcome_v they_o so_o that_o thou_o o_o thou_o life_n of_o all_o life_n do_v never_o kill_v any_o one_o of_o those_o creature_n who_o put_v his_o confidence_n in_o thou_o nor_o of_o they_o who_o desire_v thou_o for_o a_o friend_n but_o thou_o sustain_v both_o the_o life_n of_o their_o body_n with_o increase_n of_o health_n and_o thou_o also_o do_v impart_v it_o to_o the_o soul_n for_o my_o part_n i_o can_v possible_o understand_v why_o man_n shall_v fear_v as_o they_o do_v to_o begin_v to_o use_v mental_a prayer_n nor_o of_o what_o it_o be_v in_o fine_a that_o they_o be_v afraid_a the_o devil_n indeed_o do_v not_o ill_a in_o order_n to_o his_o own_o wicked_a end_n to_o procure_v to_o do_v i_o hurt_v if_o by_o pretence_n and_o mean_n of_o i_o know_v not_o what_o fear_n he_o can_v procure_v to_o make_v i_o forbear_v a_o consider_v how_o much_o and_o how_o high_o i_o have_v offend_v almighty_a god_n and_o how_o much_o i_o be_o oblige_v to_o he_o for_o his_o great_a mercy_n and_o benefit_n and_o to_o think_v upon_o this_o truth_n that_o there_o be_v such_o a_o thing_n as_o glory_v in_o heaven_n and_o torment_n in_o hell_n and_o upon_o those_o great_a affliction_n and_o sorrow_n which_o our_o lord_n endure_v for_o i_o in_o this_o life_n for_o this_o be_v still_o my_o prayer_n when_o i_o be_v continue_v in_o all_o those_o danger_n and_o upon_o this_o do_v i_o think_v whensoever_o i_o be_v able_a and_o very_o often_o yea_o and_o for_o some_o year_n together_o i_o be_v busy_a about_o desire_v that_o the_o hour_n may_v come_v quick_o to_o a_o end_n still_o listen_v when_o the_o clock_n will_v strike_v then_o upon_o better_a thing_n yea_o and_o it_o happen_v to_o i_o many_o time_n that_o i_o know_v not_o what_o penance_n can_v be_v set_v before_o i_o so_o very_o great_a as_o that_o i_o will_v not_o more_o willing_o undergo_v it_o then_o recollect_v myself_o to_o mental_a prayer_n and_o it_o be_v certain_a that_o either_o the_o devil_n do_v set_v upon_o i_o with_o such_o a_o un-resistable_a force_n or_o else_o my_o own_o wicked_a custom_n do_v it_o that_o i_o may_v not_o go_v make_v mental_a prayer_n and_o the_o sadness_n of_o my_o hart_n be_v such_o even_o when_o i_o enter_v into_o my_o oratory_n for_o that_o purpose_n that_o i_o be_v fain_o to_o help_v and_o serve_v myself_o of_o all_o the_o strength_n and_o courage_n i_o have_v which_o they_o say_v be_v not_o very_o little_a and_o it_o have_v be_v see_v that_o god_n have_v give_v i_o more_o then_o be_v usual_o possess_v by_o woman_n but_o that_o i_o have_v employ_v it_o ill_o to_o force_v myself_o to_o make_v my_o prayer_n and_o in_o fine_a it_o please_v our_o lord_n to_o assist_v i_o but_o afterward_o when_o i_o have_v use_v these_o violence_n to_o my_o hart_n i_o find_v myself_o with_o more_o quiet_a &_o delight_n so_o that_o sometime_o i_o grow_v to_o have_v a_o express_a desire_n to_o pray_v now_o therefore_o since_o it_o chance_v that_o our_o lord_n do_v suffer_v and_o endure_v so_o wicked_a a_o creature_n as_o myself_o and_o if_o it_o appear_v plain_o that_o all_o my_o misery_n be_v redress_v by_o this_o mean_n what_o person_n how_o wicked_a soever_o he_o may_v be_v can_v find_v any_o thing_n to_o be_v afraid_a of_o here_o for_o how_o wicked_a soever_o any_o other_o body_n may_v have_v be_v he_o will_v never_o be_v so_o yet_o after_o the_o enjoy_n of_o so_o great_a favour_n from_o our_o b._n lord_n as_o i_o have_v receive_v and_o who_o can_v ever_o come_v to_o disconfide_a in_o his_o divine_a majesty_n who_o have_v patience_n with_o i_o so_o long_o upon_o this_o only_o reason_n because_o i_o desire_v and_o procure_v some_o mean_n for_o time_n and_o place_n wherein_o he_o may_v be_v with_o i_o and_o even_o this_o little_a thing_n i_o do_v often_o without_o any_o inclination_n of_o my_o own_o but_o only_o by_o the_o great_a violence_n which_o either_o i_o offer_v to_o myself_o or_o else_o be_v offer_v to_o i_o by_o our_o lord_n since_o praemise_n therefore_o the_o use_n of_o mental_a prayer_n be_v so_o fit_a yea_o and_o so_o very_o necessary_a even_o for_o such_o as_o serve_v not_o god_n but_o offend_v he_o and_o since_o no_o body_n can_v true_o find_v any_o such_o hurt_n which_o it_o can_v possible_o do_v as_o will_v not_o be_v much_o great_a without_o prayer_n at_o least_o how_o can_v such_o forbear_v it_o as_o serve_v almighty_a god_n and_o desire_v to_o serve_v he_o most_o certain_o unless_o a_o man_n have_v a_o mind_n to_o pass_v through_o the_o trouble_n &_o misery_n of_o this_o life_n with_o a_o addition_n of_o more_o misery_n and_o to_o shut_v up_o the_o very_a gate_n against_o god_n himself_o for_o fear_n lest_o he_o shall_v give_v he_o comfort_n by_o this_o mean_n i_o can_v possible_o understand_v this_o proceed_n of_o he_o i_o have_v real_o great_a compassion_n and_o sorrow_n for_o those_o poor_a soul_n who_o will_v needs_o serve_v almighty_a god_n upon_o their_o own_o cost_n for_o as_o for_o they_o who_o use_v mental_a prayer_n
that_o i_o shall_v shed_v those_o tear_n do_v show_v i_o favour_n enough_o for_o his_o part_n since_o i_o forget_v the_o sense_n and_o tenderness_n thereof_o so_o soon_o and_o i_o recommend_v myself_o to_o that_o glorious_a saint_n that_o she_o may_v help_v i_o to_o obtain_v pardon_n of_o my_o sin_n but_o i_o conceive_v that_o i_o profit_v the_o more_o in_o that_o last_o time_n when_o i_o pray_v before_o the_o picture_n because_o then_o note_n i_o be_v grow_v into_o very_o great_a distrust_n of_o myself_o and_o place_v all_o my_o confidence_n in_o almighty_a god_n to_o my_o think_n i_o tell_v he_o then_o that_o i_o will_v blessing_n never_o rise_v from_o thence_o till_o he_o grant_v i_o the_o humble_a suit_n which_o i_o have_v make_v and_o i_o be_o full_o of_o opinion_n that_o it_o do_v i_o good_a for_o i_o have_v go_v improve_v much_o ever_o since_o that_o time_n now_o i_o continue_v to_o hold_v this_o manner_n of_o prayer_n because_o not_o be_v able_a to_o discourse_v with_o my_o understanding_n i_o procure_v to_o represent_v christ_n our_o lord_n to_o my_o mind_n as_o be_v then_o within_o my_o very_a self_n and_o jever_n also_o find_v it_o to_o prove_v better_o with_o i_o in_o my_o opinion_n when_o i_o conceive_v myself_o to_o find_v he_o all_o alone_a for_o he_o be_v alone_o and_o i_o be_v so_o much_o afflict_v i_o think_v he_o be_v to_o admit_v i_o yea_o and_o to_o assist_v i_o too_o as_o a_o person_n who_o be_v in_o necessity_n and_o misery_n of_o this_o kind_n of_o simplicity_n i_o have_v many_o and_o in_o particular_a i_o use_v to_o find_v myself_o very_o well_o in_o the_o prayer_n of_o the_o garden_n yea_o and_o i_o be_v in_o my_o kingdom_n when_o i_o may_v accompany_v he_o there_o i_o think_v also_o much_o upon_o that_o sweat_n together_o with_o the_o great_a affliction_n which_o he_o sustain_v then_o and_o i_o wish_v that_o i_o may_v have_v be_v permit_v to_o wipe_v that_o most_o painful_a sweat_n from_o his_o face_n but_o i_o remember_v how_o in_o fine_a i_o never_o dare_v resolve_v to_o presume_v to_o do_v it_o so_o grievous_o do_v my_o sin_n represent_v themselves_o to_o i_o howsoever_o i_o remain_v there_o by_o he_o as_o long_o as_o my_o thought_n will_v give_v i_o leave_v but_o the_o truth_n be_v i_o have_v store_n of_o such_o as_o torment_v i_o most_o night_n during_o many_o year_n before_o i_o go_v to_o rest_v and_o when_o i_o be_v recommend_v myself_o to_o god_n ere_o i_o sleep_v i_o ever_o think_v a_o little_a upon_o this_o passage_n of_o his_o prayer_n in_o the_o garden_n and_o that_o even_o before_o i_o be_v a_o religious_a woman_n for_o they_o tell_v i_o that_o i_o may_v gain_v many_o indulgence_n by_o it_o and_o at_o least_o i_o be_o of_o opinion_n that_o my_o soul_n get_v much_o by_o this_o mean_n because_o thus_o i_o begin_v to_o make_v mental_a prayer_n even_o without_o express_o know_v what_o it_o be_v and_o then_o it_o be_v as_o usual_a for_o i_o not_o to_o omit_v this_o custom_n as_o not_o to_o fail_v of_o blessing_n myself_o with_o the_o sign_n of_o the_o cross_n before_o sleep_v but_o to_o return_v to_o what_o i_o be_v say_v of_o the_o torment_n which_o my_o thought_n be_v wont_a to_o give_v i_o this_o manner_n of_o proceed_v without_o discourse_n of_o the_o understanding_n have_v this_o in_o it_o that_o the_o soul_n must_v both_o gain_v much_o and_o loose_a much_o i_o mean_v all_o consideration_n and_o discourse_n be_v lose_v for_o as_o for_o profit_v they_o profit_v much_o who_o use_v it_o since_o all_o such_o prayer_n be_v love._n but_o to_o arrive_v to_o this_o point_n &_o pitch_n it_o will_v cost_v every_o body_n a_o great_a deal_n of_o pain_n except_o such_o as_o our_o lord_n vouchsafe_v to_o conduct_v in_o a_o short_a time_n to_o quiet_a prayer_n of_o which_o kind_n i_o know_v some_o and_o for_o they_o who_o go_v by_o this_o way_n it_o will_v be_v good_a to_o have_v some_o book_n or_o other_o at_o hand_n that_o so_o they_o may_v recollect_v themselves_o quick_o as_o for_o i_o it_o do_v i_o also_o good_a to_o look_v upon_o field_n or_o flower_n or_o water_n for_o in_o these_o thing_n do_v i_o find_v the_o memory_n of_o our_o creator_n as_o i_o also_o do_v in_o my_o own_o ingratitude_n and_o sin_n all_o which_o particular_n be_v wont_a to_o awake_v i_o and_o recollect_v i_o and_o to_o serve_v i_o in_o stead_n of_o a_o book_n for_o as_o for_o heaven_n and_o such_o high_a thing_n as_o that_o my_o understanding_n be_v so_o dull_a that_o i_o can_v never_o i_o say_v never_o be_v able_a to_o have_v or_o frame_v any_o imagination_n or_o fancy_n concern_v they_o till_o our_o lord_n represent_v they_o to_o i_o by_o other_o mean_n and_o i_o have_v so_o very_o little_a ability_n to_o represent_v thing_n to_o my_o mind_n by_o way_n of_o the_o understanding-part_n that_o my_o imagination_n serve_v i_o not_o to_o work_v upon_o any_o thing_n but_o only_o what_o i_o see_v with_o my_o eye_n which_o yet_o other_o be_v able_a enough_o to_o do_v who_o know_v how_o to_o form_v certain_a representation_n of_o thing_n to_o themselves_o upon_o which_o they_o can_v recollect_v their_o thought_n for_o my_o part_n i_o can_v only_o think_v upon_o christ_n our_o lord_n as_o man_n but_o yet_o it_o be_v very_o true_a that_o how_o much_o soever_o i_o read_v of_o his_o beauty_n or_o see_v his_o picture_n yet_o can_v i_o never_o represent_v he_o to_o myself_o but_o just_a so_o as_o one_o who_o be_v either_o in_o the_o dark_a or_o else_o stark_o blind_a may_v be_v able_a at_o that_o very_a time_n to_o represent_v any_o other_o person_n to_o himself_o for_o though_o such_o a_o one_o may_v speak_v with_o such_o another_o &_o know_v that_o he_o be_v with_o that_o person_n because_o he_o be_v sure_a that_o the_o say_a person_n be_v there_o yet_o in_o fine_a he_o do_v but_o understand_v and_o believe_v he_o to_o be_v there_o for_o he_o see_v he_o not_o and_o in_o this_o sort_n do_v it_o happen_v to_o i_o when_o i_o think_v of_o our_o lord_n upon_o this_o reason_n be_v i_o so_o great_a a_o friend_n and_o favourer_n of_o the_o use_n of_o image_n or_o holy_a picture_n miserable_a creature_n be_v they_o who_o lose_v this_o benefit_n through_o their_o own_o fault_n and_o it_o appear_v also_o well_o enough_o that_o they_o do_v not_o love_v our_o lord_n for_o if_o they_o love_v he_o they_o will_v be_v glad_a to_o see_v his_o picture_n as_o here_o it_o give_v we_o contentment_n so_o see_v the_o picture_n of_o those_o person_n who_o we_o love_v about_o this_o time_n they_o give_v i_o the_o confession_n of_o s._n augustin_n and_o it_o seem_v our_o lord_n do_v so_o ordain_v it_o for_o neither_o do_v i_o procure_v they_o nor_o have_v i_o ever_o see_v they_o i_o bear_v a_o very_a great_a affection_n to_o this_o saint_n because_o the_o monastery_n where_o i_o live_v before_o i_o grow_v to_o be_v religious_a be_v of_o his_o order_n and_o beside_o in_o regard_n that_o he_o have_v be_v a_o sinner_n for_o i_o always_o find_v particular_a comfort_n in_o those_o saint_n who_o after_o have_v be_v sinner_n be_v convert_v to_o our_o lord_n as_o conceave_a that_o i_o shall_v have_v help_n by_o their_o mean_n and_o that_o our_o lord_n may_v also_o be_v induce_v to_o forgive_v i_o as_o he_o have_v do_v they_o save_o only_o that_o i_o be_v discomfort_a by_o this_o consideration_n as_o i_o have_v say_v before_o that_o our_o lord_n call_v they_o but_o once_o and_o they_o return_v not_o to_o fall_v from_o he_o any_o more_o but_o as_o for_o i_o i_o have_v fall_v so_o often_o that_o it_o afflict_v i_o to_o the_o very_a hart_n but_o yet_o still_o when_o i_o consider_v the_o love_n he_o bear_v i_o i_o grow_v to_o be_v encourage_v again_o for_o i_o never_o disinherit_v his_o mercy_n though_o i_o doubt_v of_o myself_o very_o often_o o_o my_o dear_a lord_n how_o mighty_o do_v that_o obstinate_a stiffness_n amaze_v i_o to_o which_o my_o soul_n must_v needs_o have_v be_v subject_a whilst_o it_o receive_v so_o many_o help_n at_o thy_o hand_n and_o all_o in_o vain_a and_o it_o strike_v i_o with_o much_o fear_n to_o consider_v how_o little_a i_o be_v able_a to_o win_v upon_o myself_o all_o that_o while_n and_o how_o i_o remain_v still_o bind_v up_o from_o resolve_v to_o give_v myself_o whole_o to_o thou_o but_o when_o once_o i_o begin_v to_o read_v the_o say_a confession_n i_o think_v that_o case_n which_o have_v be_v he_o be_v also_o now_o direct_o i_o own_o and_o i_o recommend_v myself_o much_o to_o that_o glorious_a saint_n but_o when_o i_o come_v afterward_o to_o his_o conversion_n and_o read_v how_o he_o hear_v that_o voice_n
to_o this_o miserable_a and_o wretched_a creature_n as_o it_o be_v likely_a that_o there_o be_v many_o if_o they_o shall_v be_v please_v to_o treat_v of_o these_o thing_n with_o i_o as_o conceave_a that_o i_o be_o mistake_v and_o out_o of_o the_o way_n our_o lord_n will_v so_o assist_v this_o poor_a servant_n of_o he_o as_o that_o she_o may_v be_v able_a to_o go_v forward_o to_o uphold_v this_o truth_n but_o now_o to_o speak_v of_o this_o last_o water_n which_o come_v from_o heaven_n to_o satisfy_v and_o even_o fulfil_v the_o whole_a garden_n by_o the_o abundance_n thereof_o if_o our_o lord_n do_v never_o forbear_v to_o give_v it_o whensoever_o there_o be_v need_n it_o be_v evident_a enough_o already_o of_o what_o case_n it_o will_v be_v to_o the_o gardener_n and_o that_o there_o will_v never_o be_v any_o winter_n but_o always_o most_o temperate_a weather_n nor_o will_v there_o ever_o be_v any_o want_n either_o of_o fruit_n or_o flower_n and_o so_o it_o may_v be_v easy_o see_v in_o what_o delight_n he_o will_v remain_v but_o as_o long_o as_o we_o live_v in_o this_o world_n this_o condition_n be_v a_o kind_n of_o impossible_a thing_n and_o we_o must_v always_o be_v in_o care_n that_o whensoever_o we_o shall_v want_v one_o of_o the_o water_n we_o may_v procure_v another_o this_o last_o which_o fall_v from_o heaven_n come_v down_o sometime_o even_o when_o the_o gardener_n think_v of_o it_o least_o true_a it_o be_v that_o these_o thing_n be_v almost_o ever_o wont_a to_o happen_v after_o a_o long_a exercise_n of_o mental_a prayer_n for_o our_o lord_n use_v to_o come_v by_o degree_n to_o catch_v this_o poor_a little_a bird_n and_o to_o lodge_v it_o then_o safe_o in_o the_o nest_n to_o the_o end_n that_o it_o may_v rest_v and_o repose_v and_o after_o it_o have_v put_v itself_o long_o upon_o flight_n procure_v by_o the_o exercise_n of_o the_o understanding_n and_o will_v and_o in_o fine_a by_o all_o the_o power_n it_o have_v to_o go_v in_o search_n of_o almighty_a god_n and_o to_o please_v he_o he_o vouchsafe_v to_o allow_v it_o a_o reward_n even_o in_o this_o life_n yea_o and_o this_o so_o very_o great_a a_o reward_n that_o any_o one_o little_a moment_n thereof_o may_v well_o suffice_v as_o a_o full_a satisfaction_n and_o retribution_n for_o all_o that_o care_n and_o trouble_v which_o he_o can_v ever_o have_v endure_v in_o this_o world_n the_o soul_n be_v thus_o in_o search_n of_o almighty_a god_n do_v find_v herself_o as_o it_o be_v even_o sink_v under_o a_o sweet_a and_o most_o excessive_a delight_n as_o be_v all_o in_o a_o certain_a way_n of_o dear_a faint_a so_o that_o the_o breath_n be_v even_o begin_v to_o fail_v and_o so_o also_o do_v all_o corporal_a strength_n in_o such_o sort_n as_o that_o the_o creature_n be_v now_o not_o able_a so_o much_o as_o to_o move_v her_o hand_n but_o with_o much_o pain_n the_o eye_n be_v also_o close_v though_o without_o any_o purpose_n to_o shut_v they_o and_o when_o by_o accident_n they_o chance_v to_o be_v open_a she_o in_o effect_n see_v nothing_o distinct_o nor_o if_o she_o read_v can_v she_o so_o much_o as_o judge_v right_o of_o any_o letter_n nor_o can_v she_o even_o guess_v how_o to_o name_v it_o right_n she_o see_v that_o indeed_o there_o be_v letter_n but_o the_o understanding_n not_o give_v she_o any_o assistance_n she_o know_v not_o how_o to_o read_v though_o she_o will_v she_o hear_v but_o yet_o understand_v not_o what_o she_o hear_v so_o that_o she_o receave_v no_o other_o benefit_n at_o all_o by_o her_o sense_n but_o only_o that_o they_o will_v not_o permit_v she_o to_o take_v the_o full_a fruition_n of_o her_o delight_n and_o so_o upon_o the_o matter_n they_o do_v she_o more_o hurt_n then_o good_a as_o for_o speak_v it_o be_v a_o vanity_n so_o much_o as_o to_o think_v of_o any_o such_o thing_n for_o she_o can_v possible_o hit_v right_a so_o much_o as_o in_o frame_v any_o one_o word_n nor_o if_o she_o be_v able_a to_o judge_v it_o be_v she_o yet_o possible_o able_a to_o pronounce_v it_o in_o regard_n that_o all_o the_o strength_n of_o her_o body_n be_v absolute_o lose_v for_o the_o great_a increase_n of_o that_o of_o her_o soul_n that_o so_o she_o may_v the_o better_o enjoy_v her_o glory_n the_o exterior_a delight_n also_o which_o she_o feel_v be_v both_o great_a and_o very_o certain_a this_o prayer_n put_v the_o person_n to_o no_o manner_n of_o inconvenience_n in_o any_o kind_n how_o long_o soever_o it_o may_v last_v at_o least_o it_o never_o put_v i_o to_o any_o nor_o be_o i_o able_a to_o remember_v when_o our_o lord_n do_v i_o this_o favour_n how_o sick_a or_o weak_a soever_o i_o be_v that_o i_o ever_o find_v myself_o the_o worse_o but_o rather_o with_o much_o improvement_n even_o in_o the_o way_n of_o health_n but_o indeed_o what_o hurt_n can_v ever_o be_v do_v to_o any_o creature_n by_o so_o great_a a_o blessing_n as_o this_o it_o be_v so_o know_v a_o truth_n concern_v the_o exterior_a operation_n that_o there_o can_v no_o doubt_n be_v make_v 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by_o those_o beam_n you_o will_v find_v it_o to_o be_v all_o full_a of_o moat_n this_o comparison_n be_v very_o literal_o true_a for_o before_o the_o soul_n be_v in_o this_o extasis_fw-la she_o conceive_v herself_o to_o have_v be_v very_o careful_a not_o to_o offend_v almighty_a god_n &_o that_o she_o perform_v it_o according_a to_o the_o uttermost_a of_o her_o power_n but_o yet_o be_v come_v once_o so_o far_o as_o that_o this_o sun_n of_o justice_n shine_v upon_o she_o which_o make_v her_o open_a her_o eye_n she_o than_o see_v so_o many_o moat_n therein_o that_o she_o will_v be_v glad_a if_o she_o can_v tell_v how_o to_o shut_v they_o again_o for_o she_o be_v not_o yet_o become_v so_o true_a a_o eaglet_n of_o this_o swift_a and_o strong_a eagle_n which_o breed_v she_o as_o that_o she_o can_v be_v able_a to_o look_v earnest_o upon_o this_o sun_n but_o how_o little_a soever_o she_o chance_v to_o hold_v they_o open_a she_o see_v herself_o all_o impure_a and_o call_v that_o verse_n to_o 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will_v declare_v some_o particular_n thereof_o for_o in_o the_o rest_n i_o will_v not_o interpose_v myself_o but_o only_o speak_v of_o the_o danger_n wherein_o i_o find_v i_o be_v because_o i_o conform_v myself_o to_o what_o i_o have_v read_v i_o well_o believe_v that_o whosoever_o shall_v find_v himself_o to_o have_v arrive_v to_o the_o state_n of_o union_n and_o not_o to_o have_v pass_v further_o on_o so_o far_o as_o to_o have_v rapt_n and_o vision_n together_o with_o such_o other_o favour_n as_o our_o lord_n be_v wont_a to_o impart_v to_o soul_n may_v hold_v that_o which_o be_v speak_v of_o to_o be_v better_a as_o i_o also_o do_v but_o yet_o if_o i_o have_v continue_v therein_o i_o believe_v i_o shall_v never_o have_v arrive_v to_o that_o pitch_n wherein_o now_o i_o be_o for_o in_o my_o opinion_n it_o be_v a_o error_n other_o and_o deceit_n though_o yet_o perhaps_o it_o may_v be_v myself_o who_o be_o the_o person_n deceive_v &_o yet_o i_o will_v relate_v what_o happen_v to_o i_o whilst_o i_o be_v in_o want_n of_o a_o director_n and_o the_o while_n go_v read_v the_o book_n afforesayd_a whereby_o i_o think_v i_o grow_v to_o understand_v somewhat_o by_o little_a and_o little_a i_o come_v indeed_o to_o find_v afterward_o that_o if_o our_o lord_n have_v not_o be_v my_o teacher_n i_o shall_v have_v learn_v very_o little_a by_o those_o book_n for_o real_o it_o be_v nothing_o which_o i_o understand_v till_o his_o divine_a majesty_n be_v please_v to_o make_v i_o know_v it_o by_o experience_n nor_o indeed_o do_v i_o know_v what_o i_o do_v but_o when_o afterward_o i_o come_v so_o far_o as_o to_o have_v some_o kind_n of_o prayer_n which_o be_v supernatural_a i_o mean_v the_o prayer_n of_o quiet_a i_o procure_v to_o dismiss_v myself_o of_o all_o kind_n of_o corporeal_a object_n though_o yet_o i_o dare_v not_o go_v raise_v and_o exalt_v my_o soul_n for_o consider_v that_o i_o be_v always_o so_o very_o wicked_a i_o see_v that_o this_o be_v to_o be_v a_o great_a presumption_n in_o i_o but_o then_o i_o come_v to_o think_v that_o i_o feel_v a_o kind_n of_o presence_n of_o almighty_a god_n in_o i_o after_o a_o particular_a manner_n as_o indeed_o i_o do_v and_o i_o procure_v to_o recollect_v myself_o with_o he_o and_o this_o be_v a_o very_a savoury_a and_o gustfull_a kind_n of_o prayer_n if_o our_o lord_n assist_v a_o soul_n particular_o therein_o and_o the_o delight_n of_o it_o be_v great_a and_o when_o both_o the_o profit_n and_o pleasure_n which_o it_o give_v be_v once_o observe_v by_o the_o soul_n there_o can_v be_v then_o no_o mean_n to_o make_v i_o return_v again_o to_o the_o humanity_n of_o christ_n our_o lord_n because_o in_o reality_n of_o truth_n i_o conceive_v that_o it_o be_v a_o impediment_n to_o i_o othou_fw-mi lord_n
of_o my_o soul_n and_o my_o good_a thou_o christ_n our_o lord_n who_o be_v crucify_a i_o never_o call_v to_o mind_v the_o opinion_n which_o i_o entertain_v in_o this_o case_n but_o i_o be_o afflict_v by_o it_o for_o i_o conceive_v myself_o to_o have_v commit_v a_o huge_a treason_n therein_o against_o thou_o though_o yet_o my_o ignorance_n may_v peradventure_o have_v be_v some_o excuse_n i_o have_v be_v so_o particular_o devote_a to_o the_o person_n of_o christ_n our_o lord_n throughout_o the_o whole_a course_n of_o my_o life_n for_o this_o other_o proceed_v of_o i_o occur_v in_o the_o very_a latter_a part_n thereof_o i_o say_v in_o the_o very_a latter_a part_n immediate_o before_o our_o bless_a lord_n vouchsafe_v i_o those_o favour_n of_o rapt_n and_o vision_n i_o continue_v a_o very_a little_a while_n in_o this_o opinion_n and_o so_o i_o ever_o come_v quick_o back_o to_o delight_v myself_o with_o this_o dear_a lord_n of_o i_o and_o especial_o when_o i_o receive_v the_o bless_a sacrament_n i_o ever_o desire_v to_o have_v some_o picture_n of_o he_o in_o my_o eye_n since_o i_o be_v not_o able_a to_o carry_v he_o so_o deep_o engrave_v or_o stamp_v upon_o my_o soul_n as_o i_o can_v have_v wish_v but_o be_v it_o possible_a o_o my_o dear_a lord_n that_o ever_o any_o such_o thought_n as_o this_o shall_v be_v able_a to_o get_v in_o to_o my_o hart_n even_o for_o one_o single_a hour_n as_o that_o thou_o be_v to_o have_v be_v able_a to_o hinder_v my_o obtain_v my_o great_a good_n alas_o from_o whence_o come_v all_o the_o benediction_n and_o benefit_n which_o ever_o i_o receive_v but_o only_o from_o thou_o but_o i_o will_v not_o so_o much_o as_o think_v that_o real_o i_o be_v faulty_a herein_o but_o rather_o i_o be_o to_o pity_v myself_o for_o that_o which_o certain_o proceed_v from_o ignorance_n in_o i_o and_o so_o thou_o do_v vouchsafe_v through_o thy_o goodness_n to_o redress_v and_o assist_v i_o by_o help_v i_o to_o one_o afterward_o who_o may_v deliver_v i_o out_o 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one_o moment_n from_o we_o and_o that_o now_o it_o shall_v yet_o have_v be_v in_o i_o to_o part_v from_o thou_o o_o my_o lord_n yea_o and_o this_o that_o i_o may_v serve_v thou_o so_o much_o the_o better_o it_o let_v it_o pass_v my_o dear_a lord_n if_o it_o please_v thou_o that_o when_o i_o sin_v against_o thou_o i_o do_v not_o know_v thou_o but_o that_o now_o when_o i_o come_v to_o know_v thou_o i_o shall_v fancy_v a_o mean_n to_o myself_o of_o grow_v a_o great_a gainer_n by_o this_o way_n o_o what_o a_o ill_a way_n be_v that_o and_o now_o i_o find_v that_o indeed_o i_o have_v utter_o lose_v my_o way_n if_o thou_o o_o lord_n have_v not_o restore_v i_o to_o it_o for_o in_o see_v that_o thou_o be_v near_o i_o i_o have_v see_v that_o i_o have_v all_o good_a thing_n with_o thou_o nor_o do_v i_o ever_o meet_v with_o any_o affliction_n or_o trouble_v but_o as_o soon_o as_o i_o consider_v in_o what_o kind_n of_o miserable_a posture_n thou_o be_v carry_v and_o place_v before_o those_o judge_n 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himself_o have_v tell_v vision_n i_o so_o i_o have_v also_o clear_o see_v that_o we_o be_v to_o enter_v in_o by_o this_o gate_n if_o we_o desire_v that_o his_o sovereign_a majesty_n shall_v communicate_v great_a secret_n to_o our_o soul_n so_o that_o sir_n i_o wish_v your_o reverence_n not_o to_o put_v yourself_o upon_o any_o other_o way_n than_o this_o though_o you_o shall_v be_v even_o upon_o the_o very_a high_a top_n of_o contemplation_n for_o here_o you_o shall_v find_v yourself_o safe_a since_o this_o lord_n of_o we_o be_v he_o by_o who_o mean_n we_o be_v to_o receive_v all_o
lord_n through_o his_o goodness_n make_v i_o see_v it_o and_o show_v it_o i_o in_o a_o certain_a rapt_v of_o i_o so_o also_o shall_v it_o be_v here_o in_o this_o world_n and_o that_o so_o almighty_a god_n and_o the_o soul_n may_v be_v able_a to_o understand_v one_o another_o and_o that_o upon_o this_o sole_a cause_n and_o reason_n in_o regard_n that_o his_o divine_a majesty_n be_v please_v that_o they_o shall_v do_v so_o without_o any_o other_o artifice_n or_o mean_n that_o so_o the_o mutual_a love_n which_o these_o two_o dear_a friend_n carry_v to_o one_o another_o may_v be_v give_v by_o they_o to_o be_v mutual_o understand_v just_o so_o as_o in_o this_o world_n when_o two_o person_n love_v one_o another_o very_o dear_o and_o be_v endue_v with_o a_o good_a understanding_n and_o wit_n they_o seem_v able_a to_o understand_v themselves_o together_o even_o without_o so_o much_o as_o sign_n and_o by_o only_a look_v well_o upon_o one_o another_o thus_o ought_v it_o to_o be_v in_o our_o 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have_v proceed_v after_o this_o manner_n even_o with_o i_o and_o advance_v i_o to_o such_o a_o condition_n as_o you_o see_v consider_v also_o that_o this_o which_o i_o be_o say_v now_o be_v not_o so_o much_o as_o a_o little_a cipher_n of_o that_o which_o be_v to_o be_v say_v but_o only_o so_o much_o be_v here_o deliver_v as_o be_v necessary_a for_o the_o give_v this_o manner_n of_o vision_n and_o favour_n which_o almighty_a god_n be_v please_v to_o do_v to_o a_o soul_n to_o be_v in_o some_o sort_n understand_v but_o now_o it_o be_v in_o no_o power_n of_o i_o to_o declare_v that_o which_o she_o find_v and_o feel_v when_o our_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o impart_v those_o secret_n and_o greatness_n of_o he_o together_o with_o that_o delight_n which_o be_v so_o high_o superior_a to_o all_o those_o other_o which_o can_v possible_o be_v impart_v by_o this_o world_n and_o that_o they_o do_v with_o a_o mighty_a deal_n of_o reason_n make_v they_o who_o possess_v the_o same_o even_o abhor_v all_o the_o pleasure_n of_o the_o earth_n which_o when_o they_o be_v all_o clap_v together_o be_v no_o better_o then_o mere_a dung_n and_o dirt_n nay_o it_o be_v after_o a_o sort_n even_o to_o give_v one_o a_o vomit_n to_o bring_v these_o into_o any_o comparison_n at_o all_o with_o those_o other_o even_o though_o they_o shall_v be_v able_a to_o last_v for_o ever_o and_o yet_o of_o these_o celestial_a joy_n what_o kind_n of_o poor_a proportion_n of_o they_o be_v that_o which_o he_o be_v please_v to_o impart_v in_o this_o world_n no_o more_o then_o as_o it_o be_v one_o slight_a single_a drop_n of_o water_n of_o that_o huge_a full_a flow_a river_n which_o be_v prepare_v for_o we_o in_o heaven_n it_o be_v a_o very_a shame_n &_o scorn_n and_o real_o i_o employ_v it_o all_o against_o myself_o and_o if_o it_o be_v possible_a for_o soul_n to_o be_v affront_v even_o in_o heaven_n i_o shall_v have_v cause_n to_o find_v myself_o ashamed_a when_o i_o be_v there_o more_o than_o any_o creature_n to_o 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the_o course_n be_v utter_o mistake_v and_o we_o shall_v never_o be_v able_a to_o arrive_v at_o that_o journey_n end_n by_o any_o such_o erroneous_a way_n as_o this_o your_o reverence_n must_v cry-out_a aloud_o to_o make_v these_o truth_n be_v hear_v and_o believe_v by_o the_o world_n and_o since_o it_o have_v please_v almighty_a god_n to_o take_v this_o power_n and_o liberty_n from_o i_o i_o will_v always_o be_v cry_v they_o out_o to_o myself_o but_o both_o he_o hear_v i_o and_o i_o come_v also_o to_o understand_v he_o so_o very_o late_o as_o may_v be_v see_v by_o what_o i_o have_v write_v here_o and_o it_o be_v no_o less_o than_o matter_n of_o extreme_a confusion_n to_o i_o to_o speak_v of_o it_o and_o therefore_o i_o will_v now_o hold_v my_o peace_n and_o for_o the_o present_a will_v only_o say_v that_o which_o i_o have_v be_v consider_v sometime_o which_o be_v that_o i_o humble_o beseech_v almighty_a god_n to_o bring_v i_o once_o to_o such_o term_n as_o that_o i_o may_v enjoy_v this_o immense_a good_n o_o what_o a_o accidental_a glory_n and_o gust_n will_v it_o be_v for_o the_o bless_a saint_n of_o heaven_n who_o enjoy_v this_o felicity_n when_o they_o shall_v find_v that_o although_o it_o be_v late_o yet_o at_o length_n they_o leave_v nothing_o unperformed_a which_o it_o be_v possible_a for_o they_o to_o do_v for_o the_o love_n of_o almighty_a god_n nor_o do_v they_o fail_v to_o present_v he_o with_o the_o very_a uttermost_a of_o whatsoever_o they_o can_v offer_v in_o all_o kind_n according_a to_o the_o power_n which_o they_o have_v and_o to_o the_o condition_n wherein_o they_o be_v place_v he_o give_v they_o still_o more_o who_o have_v more_o how_o rich_a will_v he_o then_o find_v himself_o to_o be_v who_o leave_v all_o the_o riches_n he_o have_v for_o christ_n our_o lord_n how_o full_a of_o honour_n who_o reject_v all_o honour_n and_o take_v no_o pleasure_n in_o any_o other_o thing_n then_o to_o find_v himself_o abase_v and_o despise_v for_o the_o love_n of_o he_o how_o wise_a will_v he_o see_v himself_o then_o who_o rejoice_v to_o see_v the_o world_n hold_v he_o for_o a_o fool_n since_o they_o call_v wisdom_n itself_o by_o that_o name_n but_o how_o few_o of_o such_o as_o these_o be_v there_o now_o in_o the_o world_n by_o reason_n of_o our_o great_a sin_n alas_o it_o seem_v that_o all_o they_o be_v spend_v and_o go_v long_o ago_o who_o the_o world_n be_v wont_n to_o eastern_a for_o mad_a fool_n when_o they_o see_v they_o perform_v those_o heroical_a act_n of_o true_a lover_n of_o christ_n our_o lord_n o_o world_n o_o world_n how_o do_v thou_o go_v gain_v honour_n
say_v very_o much_o more_o of_o he_o if_o i_o fear_v not_o that_o your_o reverence_n will_v ask_v i_o why_o i_o put_v myself_o upon_o this_o kind_n of_o discourse_n yea_o and_o i_o have_v not_o write_v even_o this_o little_a without_o some_o fear_n and_o therefore_o i_o say_v no_o more_o but_o only_o that_o he_o die_v as_o he_o live_v in_o preach_v and_o admonish_v the_o religious_a of_o his_o order_n and_o when_o he_o see_v that_o he_o be_v even_o come_v to_o a_o end_n he_o say_v the_o psalm_n of_o laetatus_fw-la sum_fw-la in_o he_o quae_fw-la dicta_fw-la sunt_fw-la mihi_fw-la in_fw-la domum_fw-la domini_fw-la ibimus_fw-la i_o have_v rejoice_v in_o that_o which_o they_o have_v say_v to_o i_o we_o will_v go_v into_o the_o house_n of_o our_o lord_n and_o so_o stoop_v dough_n and_o kneeling_z he_o die_v after_o this_o our_o lord_n have_v be_v please_v to_o let_v i_o enjoy_v more_o of_o he_o now_o than_o i_o do_v when_o he_o be_v alive_a for_o he_o give_v i_o counsel_n in_o diverse_a 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also_o consider_v that_o i_o have_v do_v no_o good_a thing_n late_o which_o may_v even_o in_o my_o opinion_n deserve_v his_o favour_n i_o begin_v to_o consider_v a_o while_n whether_o he_o may_v not_o perhaps_o intend_v some_o new_a expression_n of_o goodness_n to_o i_o because_o whensoever_o i_o find_v myself_o receive_v any_o particular_a favour_n from_o our_o lord_n it_o be_v ordinary_o after_o i_o have_v even_o defeat_v and_o annihilate_v myself_o and_o i_o conceive_v that_o our_o lord_n proceed_v thus_o with_o i_o to_o the_o end_n that_o i_o may_v see_v the_o more_o clear_o how_o far_o i_o be_o out_o of_o the_o way_n of_o deserue_v his_o favour_n short_o after_o this_o my_o spirit_n be_v so_o absorb_v and_o snatch_v away_o that_o in_o effect_n it_o seem_v to_o be_v absolute_o out_o of_o my_o body_n at_o least_o it_o be_v not_o understand_v that_o it_o live_v in_o it_o and_o then_o i_o see_v the_o most_o sacred_a humanity_n of_o our_o bless_a lord_n in_o much_o more_o excessive_a glory_n than_o ever_o i_o have_v discern_v before_o now_o this_o be_v represent_v to_o i_o by_o a_o certain_a admirable_a and_o clear_a notice_n of_o his_o be_v place_v in_o the_o very_a bosom_n of_o his_o father_n nor_o yet_o do_v i_o know_v what_o to_o say_v of_o how_o this_o be_v for_o it_o seem_v to_o i_o that_o i_o see_v myself_o present_a before_o that_o very_a divinity_n and_o yet_o without_o see_v myself_o and_o i_o remain_v so_o amaze_v and_o every_o way_n indeed_o in_o such_o sort_n that_o i_o think_v there_o pass_v some_o day_n before_o i_o be_v able_a to_o return_v to_o myself_o for_o still_o i_o be_v conceave_a that_o i_o have_v the_o majesty_n of_o the_o son_n of_o god_n present_a with_o i_o though_o it_o be_v not_o yet_o like_o the_o former_a for_o this_o i_o understand_v well_o enough_o but_o how_o soever_o it_o remain_v so_o engrave_v in_o my_o imagination_n that_o i_o can_v be_v ride_v of_o it_o how_o short_a soever_o the_o time_n be_v wherein_o it_o be_v represent_v 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same_o may_v be_v either_o more_o or_o less_o but_o in_o this_o it_o be_v extraordinary_o great_a when_o i_o come_v to_o receive_v the_o bless_a sacrament_n and_o i_o do_v then_o record_v to_o myself_o that_o incomparable_a majesty_n which_o i_o have_v see_v and_o understand_v to_o be_v the_o very_a same_o which_o be_v in_o this_o most_o holy_a sacrament_n and_o many_o time_n our_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o let_v i_o see_v he_o in_o the_o sacred_a host_n where_o upon_o the_o very_a hair_n of_o my_o head_n will_v stand_v on_o end_n and_o i_o thought_n i_o be_v even_o annihilate_v outtight_n o_o my_o dear_a lord_n and_o if_o thou_o do_v
different_a kind_n be_v round_o about_o i_o which_o circle_v i_o in_o and_o it_o seem_v to_o i_o that_o cuerie_n one_o have_v offensive_a weapon_n in_o his_o hand_n wherewith_o to_o hurt_v i_o as_o lance_n sword_n and_o dagger_n and_o other_o have_v also_o long_a staff_n in_o a_o word_n i_o can_v not_o get_v from_o thence_o by_o any_o way_n or_o mean_n without_o danger_n of_o death_n especial_o be_v alone_o and_o not_o have_v any_o one_o creature_n to_o help_v i_o and_o be_v thus_o in_o so_o great_a affliction_n of_o spirit_n that_o i_o know_v not_o what_o to_o do_v i_o liftedup_a my_o eye_n towards_o heaven_n and_o see_v christ_n our_o lord_n not_o then_o in_o heaven_n but_o yet_o very_o high_a and_o far_o off_o from_o i_o in_o the_o air_n who_o reachtforth_o his_o hand_n towards_o i_o and_o favour_v i_o from_o thence_o in_o such_o sort_n that_o i_o fear_v neither_o all_o that_o other_o people_n nor_o yet_o these_o who_o all_o be_v unable_a to_o do_v i_o hurt_v how_o much_o soever_o they_o shall_v desire_v it_o this_o vision_n seem_v at_o the_o first_o sight_n to_o be_v without_o any_o fruit_n or_o good_a effect_n at_o all_o but_o it_o have_v yet_o do_v i_o a_o great_a deal_n of_o good_a because_o i_o have_v understand_v what_o it_o signify_v for_o i_o see_v myself_o in_o that_o encounter_n short_o after_o and_o know_v that_o it_o be_v nothing_o else_o but_o this_o vision_n and_o i_o also_o come_v to_o know_v it_o to_o be_v a_o very_a picture_n or_o rather_o map_n of_o the_o world_n for_o as_o many_o as_o be_v in_o it_o abstract_v ever_o from_o those_o few_o who_o apply_v themselves_o to_o do_v our_o lord_n particular_a service_n seem_v to_o carry_v arm_n against_o this_o wretched_a soul_n of_o we_o as_o namely_o honour_n estate_n delight_n and_o the_o like_a for_o it_o be_v evident_a that_o the_o soul_n be_v all_o overcast_v with_o a_o net_n before_o it_o be_v aware_a at_o least_o all_o these_o thing_n do_v the_o best_a they_o can_v to_o endanger_v and_o wrapp_v we_o up_o fast_o enough_o as_o namely_o friend_n kindred_n and_o which_o amaze_v i_o more_o even_o such_o as_o be_v virtuous_a people_n for_o i_o find_v myself_o afterward_o to_o be_v extreme_o press_v and_o even_o oppress_v by_o they_o they_o conceave_a in_o the_o mean_a time_n that_o they_o carry_v themselves_o very_o well_o but_o the_o while_n i_o know_v not_o at_o all_o either_o how_o to_o defend_v myself_o or_o what_o to_o do_v o_o my_o dear_a god_n and_o if_o now_o i_o shall_v stand_v to_o relate_v the_o kind_n and_o difference_n of_o those_o trouble_n which_o set_v upon_o i_o at_o that_o time_n even_o after_o all_o those_o other_o whereof_o i_o speak_v before_o how_o well_o may_v this_o be_v able_a to_o serve_v for_o a_o mean_n to_o make_v a_o man_n whole_o abhor_v all_o thing_n it_o be_v i_o think_v the_o very_o great_a persecution_n of_o all_o that_o ever_o i_o have_v endure_v for_o i_o feel_v myself_o at_o some_o time_n so_o straight_o set_v upon_o on_o all_o side_n that_o i_o only_o find_v remedy_n by_o lifting-up_a my_o eye_n to_o heaven_n and_o cry_v upon_o almighty_a god_n and_o i_o remember_v very_o well_o what_o i_o have_v see_v in_o this_o last_o vision_n of_o i_o and_o it_o do_v i_o a_o great_a deal_n of_o good_a towards_o a_o not_o put_v confidence_n in_o any_o creature_n for_o there_o be_v no_o one_o of_o they_o firm_a and_o stable_n but_o only_o god_n alone_o be_v entire_o and_o true_o so_o but_o in_o these_o great_a affliction_n our_o lord_n have_v ever_o use_v to_o send_v i_o some_o person_n or_o other_o who_o in_o his_o name_n may_v lend_v i_o his_o hand_n as_o he_o signify_v to_o i_o that_o he_o will_v and_o as_o he_o do_v also_o let_v i_o see_v in_o this_o last_o vision_n and_o so_o i_o tie_v not_o myself_o to_o any_o thing_n but_o only_o to_o please_v our_o bless_a lord_n and_o this_o have_v serve_v to_o sustain_v this_o poor_a little_a virtue_n which_o i_o have_v in_o desire_v to_o serve_v he_o and_o let_v he_o be_v bless_v for_o ever_o but_o find_v myself_o once_o very_o unquiet_a and_o in_o great_a disorder_n yea_o and_o in_o skirmish_n or_o rather_o in_o a_o very_a battle_n without_o be_v able_a to_o recollect_v myself_o yea_o and_o my_o thought_n be_v scatter_v and_o disperse_v upon_o thing_n which_o be_v not_o very_o perfect_a and_o withal_o not_o seem_v to_o be_v so_o utter_o untie_v from_o all_o thing_n as_o i_o use_v and_o be_v still_o so_o wicked_a as_o i_o be_v i_o grow_v afraid_a that_o the_o favour_n which_o our_o bless_a lord_n have_v do_v i_o may_v fallout_a to_o be_v illusion_n and_o in_o fine_a i_o then_o remain_v with_o a_o very_a great_a obscuritic_n of_o mind_n but_o now_o whilst_o i_o be_v in_o this_o pain_n our_o lord_n begin_v to_o speak_v to_o i_o and_o tell_v i_o that_o i_o must_v not_o be_v thus_o afflict_v but_o that_o find_v myself_o in_o that_o case_n i_o may_v well_o understand_v even_o thereby_o in_o how_o great_a misery_n i_o must_v remain_v if_o once_o he_o shall_v depart_v from_o i_o and_o that_o there_o be_v to_o be_v no_o security_n at_o all_o as_o long_o as_o we_o shall_v continue_v in_o this_o world_n i_o be_v also_o give_v to_o understand_v how_o well_o our_o labour_n be_v employ_v in_o this_o strife_n and_o war_n since_o it_o will_v not_o fail_v to_o be_v follow_v with_o so_o high_a a_o reward_n and_o i_o think_v our_o bless_a lord_n have_v compassion_n of_o they_o who_o live_v in_o this_o world_n but_o that_o i_o must_v not_o think_v that_o he_o have_v forget_v i_o yea_o and_o that_o he_o will_v never_o leave_v i_o but_o yet_o so_o as_o that_o still_o i_o must_v also_o do_v my_o part_n in_o help_v myself_o and_o this_o do_v our_o bless_a lord_n declare_v to_o i_o with_o a_o kind_n of_o tender_a compassion_n and_o regalo_n accompany_v with_o certain_a word_n whereby_o so_o high_a favour_n be_v do_v i_o as_o i_o need_v not_o stand_v here_o to_o relate_v and_o these_o other_o which_o follow_v here_o now_o his_o divine_a majesty_n say_v also_o often_o to_o i_o with_o demonstration_n of_o most_o particular_a love_n thou_o be_v now_o grow_v to_o be_v i_o and_o i_o be_o thou_o and_o those_o word_n which_o i_o be_o ever_o wont_a to_o say_v and_o to_o my_o think_n i_o say_v they_o with_o much_o truth_n be_v these_o which_o follow_v what_o care_v i_o o_o my_o lord_n for_o myself_o but_o only_o for_o thou_o but_o i_o confess_v those_o word_n of_o he_o to_o i_o be_v of_o great_a regalo_n to_o my_o hart_n though_o yet_o withal_o they_o be_v of_o excessive_a confusion_n when_o i_o remember_v what_o kind_n of_o creature_n i_o be_o but_o hart_n it_o seem_v that_o i_o have_v need_n of_o more_o courage_n for_o the_o receive_n of_o those_o high_a favour_n then_o even_o for_o the_o endure_a of_o unspeakable_a affliction_n but_o now_o when_o these_o thing_n be_v in_o motion_n all_o the_o poor_a good_a action_n of_o my_o life_n be_v utter_o forget_v by_o i_o and_o then_o it_o be_v only_o represent_v to_o my_o mind_n how_o wicked_a i_o be_o and_o that_o without_o any_o discourse_n at_o all_o of_o my_o understanding_n so_o that_o even_o this_o also_o do_v seem_v at_o certain_a time_n to_o have_v somewhat_o of_o the_o supernatural_a in_o it_o sometime_o there_o come_v also_o upon_o i_o so_o earnest_a and_o even_o eager_a appetite_n of_o receive_v the_o bless_a sacrament_n that_o i_o know_v not_o whether_o it_o can_v be_v possible_a for_o i_o to_o express_v they_o to_o the_o full_a it_o happen_v to_o i_o one_o morning_n that_o it_o rain_v so_o extreme_o as_o to_o seem_v no_o way_n fit_a for_o i_o to_o go_v out_o of_o door_n but_o yet_o be_v once_o get_v abroad_o i_o be_v already_o grow_v also_o to_o be_v so_o far_o out_o of_o myself_o through_o that_o desire_n of_o communicate_v that_o although_o they_o have_v set_v lance_n even_o point_v and_o hold_v fast_o against_o my_o very_a breast_n i_o think_v i_o can_v have_v pass_v even_o through_o they_o all_o and_o how_o much_o more_o then_o through_o water_n and_o as_o soon_o as_o i_o arrive_v at_o church_n i_o be_v take_v with_o a_o very_a great_a rapt_v for_o i_o think_v the_o very_a heaven_n be_v open_a and_o not_o by_o one_o overture_n only_o as_o i_o have_v see_v it_o at_o other_o time_n and_o i_o see_v another_o also_o above_o that_o upon_o which_o i_o understand_v by_o way_n of_o a_o certain_a notice_n which_o i_o be_o not_o able_a to_o express_v the_o divinity_n itself_o to_o be_v though_o yet_o i_o see_v not_o the_o divinity_n and_o i_o think_v it_o be_v uphold_v by_o certain_a mysterious_a beast_n and_o i_o be_v
have_v begin_v to_o obey_v she_o also_o declare_v for_o how_o little_a purpose_n it_o serve_v to_o resist_v the_o favour_n of_o almighty_a god_n and_o how_o his_o divine_a majesty_n go_v daily_o impart_v they_o to_o she_o after_o a_o more_o complete_a manner_n chap._n 25._o she_o treat_v here_o of_o the_o way_n and_o manner_n of_o understand_v those_o word_n or_o speech_n which_o almighty_a god_n be_v please_v to_o utter_v to_o the_o soul_n though_o yet_o without_o hear_v any_o voice_n or_o sound_n and_o of_o some_o error_n or_o abuse_n which_o may_v happen_v herein_o and_o how_o the_o right_a may_v be_v know_v from_o the_o wrong_n it_o be_v of_o much_o use_n and_o profit_n for_o such_o as_o see_v themselves_o in_o this_o degree_n of_o prayer_n for_o it_o be_v declare_v very_o well_o and_o the_o doctrine_n contain_v great_a instruction_n 26._o chap._n she_o prosecute_v the_o same_o discourse_n and_o go_v relate_v and_o declare_v such_o thing_n as_o happen_v to_o she_o which_o make_v she_o to_o loose_a fear_n and_o to_o be_v strengthen_v in_o a_o belief_n that_o it_o be_v a_o good_a spirit_n which_o speak_v to_o she_o 27._o chap._n she_o treat_v of_o another_o way_n how_o our_o lord_n instruct_v a_o soul_n and_o give_v she_o to_o understand_v his_o will_n after_o a_o very_a admirable_a manner_n without_o any_o speech_n at_o all_o she_o also_o declare_v a_o certain_a vision_n and_o great_a favour_n which_o our_o lord_n show_v she_o and_o this_o vision_n be_v not_o imaginary_a this_o chaepter_n be_v very_o much_o to_o be_v note_v 28._o chap._n she_o treat_v of_o the_o great_a favour_n which_o our_o lord_n do_v she_o and_o how_o he_o appear_v to_o she_o the_o first_o time_n she_o declare_v that_o it_o be_v a_o vision_n which_o show_v itself_o by_o way_n of_o the_o imagination_n and_o discover_v the_o great_a effect_n and_o testimony_n which_o such_o thing_n leave_v in_o the_o soul_n when_o they_o be_v of_o almighty_a god_n this_o chapter_n be_v of_o great_a instruction_n and_o deserve_v to_o be_v note_v much_o 29._o chap._n she_o prosecute_v the_o discourse_n which_o she_o have_v begin_v and_o relate_v some_o high_a favour_n which_o our_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o do_v she_o and_o what_o his_o divine_a majesty_n do_v further_o for_o the_o secure_n and_o encourage_a her_o mind_n and_o for_o the_o enable_v she_o to_o answer_n her_o contradictour_n 30._o chap._n she_o return_v to_o recount_v the_o course_n of_o her_o life_n and_o how_o our_o lord_n give_v remedy_n to_o many_o of_o her_o trouble_n by_o bring_v that_o holy_a man_n fray_n pedro_n de_fw-fr alcantara_n of_o the_o order_n of_o the_o glorious_a s._n francis_n to_o the_o place_n where_o she_o be_v and_o she_o declare_v the_o great_a temptation_n and_o inward_a trouble_n which_o sometime_o she_o endure_v 31_o chap._n she_o treat_v of_o certain_a exterior_a temptation_n and_o representation_n of_o the_o devil_n and_o of_o the_o torment_n which_o he_o give_v she_o she_o speak_v also_o of_o other_o thing_n which_o be_v very_o fit_a for_o the_o advice_n and_o instruction_n of_o such_o person_n as_o be_v walk_v on_o in_o the_o way_n of_o perfection_n 32._o chap._n she_o treat_v how_o it_o please_v our_o lord_n to_o put_v she_o in_o spirit_n into_o a_o place_n of_o hell_n which_o she_o say_v she_o have_v deserve_v for_o her_o sin_n she_o relate_v what_o be_v represent_v to_o she_o there_o which_o be_v but_o a_o kind_n of_o shadow_n of_o such_o thing_n as_o be_v suffer_v in_o that_o place_n she_o begin_v also_o to_o declare_v the_o way_n and_o manner_n how_o that_o monastery_n be_v found_v in_o auila_n under_o the_o name_n of_o s._n joseph_n 33._o chap._n she_o proceed_v in_o the_o same_o subject_n of_o the_o foundation_n of_o the_o monastery_n of_o the_o glorious_a s._n joseph_n she_o declare_v how_o she_o be_v command_v to_o attend_v to_o that_o business_n and_o of_o the_o time_n when_o she_o forbear_v to_o follow_v it_o and_o of_o some_o trouble_n which_o she_o have_v and_o how_o she_o be_v comfort_v in_o they_o by_o our_o bless_a lord_n chap._n 34._o she_o declare_v how_o at_o this_o time_n she_o be_v necessary_o to_o go_v from_o that_o place_n and_o she_o show_v the_o cause_n thereof_o and_o how_o her_o superior_a command_v she_o to_o go_v for_o the_o comfort_n of_o a_o certain_a lady_n who_o be_v much_o afflict_v she_o begin_v to_o treat_v of_o that_o which_o happen_v to_o she_o there_o and_o of_o the_o great_a favour_n which_o it_o please_v our_o lord_n to_o do_v by_o her_o mean_n in_o stirring-up_a a_o very_a principal_a person_n to_o do_v he_o very_o great_a service_n and_o how_o afterward_o she_o receive_v much_o favour_n and_o protection_n from_o he_o this_o be_v a_o admirable_a discourse_n and_o very_o much_o to_o be_v note_v 35._o chap._n she_o prosecute_v the_o same_o subject_n about_o the_o foundation_n of_o this_o house_n of_o our_o glorious_a father_n s._n joseph_n she_o speak_v of_o the_o degree_n by_o which_o our_o lord_n come_v to_o appoint_v that_o holy_a poverty_n shall_v be_v ordain_v there_o and_o of_o the_o cause_n why_o she_o come_v from_o that_o lady_n with_o who_o she_o be_v and_o of_o other_o thing_n also_o which_o succeed_v 36._o chap._n she_o prosecute_v the_o subject_n which_o she_o have_v begunn_v and_o declare_v the_o final_a conclusion_n of_o this_o monastery_n of_o the_o glorious_a s._n joseph_n of_o auila_n and_o of_o the_o great_a contradiction_n and_o persecution_n which_o the_o religious_a woman_n be_v put_v to_o suffer_v even_o after_o they_o have_v take_v the_o habit_n and_o of_o the_o many_o trouble_n and_o temptation_n which_o she_o be_v fain_o to_o undergo_v and_o how_o his_o divine_a majesty_n draw_v she_o out_o of_o all_o with_o victory_n to_o his_o own_o praise_n and_o glory_n 37._o chap._n she_o treat_v of_o the_o effect_n which_o use_v to_o remain_v in_o her_o soul_n when_o our_o lord_n have_v do_v she_o any_o favour_n and_o she_o accompany_v this_o discourse_n with_o very_o profitable_a doctrine_n she_o declare_v also_o how_o we_o be_v to_o procure_v and_o great_o esteem_v the_o gain_n of_o one_o degree_n of_o glory_n more_o and_o how_o we_o must_v not_o for_o any_o trouble_n or_o pain_n forsake_v those_o benefit_n &_o blessing_n which_o be_v everlasting_a 38._o chap._n she_o treat_v of_o some_o great_a favour_n which_o our_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o do_v she_o as_o well_o in_o acquaint_v she_o with_o certain_a secret_n of_o heaven_n as_o by_o give_v she_o other_o great_a vision_n and_o revelation_n she_o declare_v also_o the_o effect_n which_o they_o leave_v in_o her_o soul_n and_o the_o great_a benefit_n which_o she_o obtain_v by_o they_o 39_o chap._n she_o proceed_v in_o the_o same_o subject_n of_o show_v the_o great_a favour_n which_o our_o lord_n have_v do_v she_o and_o she_o declare_v how_o he_o be_v please_v to_o promise_v his_o favour_n to_o they_o for_o who_o she_o shall_v beg_v it_o and_o she_o relate_v some_o important_a particular_n wherein_o his_o divine_a majesty_n have_v do_v her_o extraordinary_a favour_n of_o this_o kind_n 40._o chap._n she_o proceed_v in_o the_o same_o discourse_n by_o relate_v the_o great_a favour_n which_o our_o lord_n show_v she_o whereby_o good_a instruction_n be_v to_o be_v get_v and_o with_o the_o end_n of_o this_o chapter_n she_o end_v also_o the_o discourse_n of_o her_o life_n 41._o a_o letter_n write_v by_o the_o glorious_a s._n teresa_n which_o she_o send_v together_o with_o the_o book_n to_o her_o ghostly_a father_n approbatio_fw-la haec_fw-la vita_fw-la s._n teresae_fw-la primùm_fw-la hispanico_fw-la sermone_fw-la à _fw-la se_fw-la conscripta_fw-la &_o postea_fw-la taliter_fw-la edita_fw-la nunc_fw-la verò_fw-la felicissimè_fw-la anglicè_fw-la reddita_fw-la per_fw-la ill_n m_o virum_fw-la m._n t._n iussu_fw-la r_o mi_fw-mi antuerpiensis_n à _fw-la i_o attentè_fw-fr perlecta_fw-la fuit_fw-la &_o in_o eadem_fw-la nihil_fw-la dum_fw-la reperi_fw-la vel_fw-la contra_fw-la fidem_fw-la vel_fw-la quod_fw-la possit_fw-la meo_fw-la iudicio_fw-la pias_fw-la &_o christianas_n aures_fw-la offendere_fw-la imò_fw-la cum_fw-la amorem_fw-la eius_fw-la seraphicum_fw-la undique_fw-la lucentem_fw-la ac_fw-la inflammantem_fw-la lector_fw-la experiatur_fw-la censeo_fw-la dignissimam_fw-la ut_fw-la in_o communem_fw-la etiam_fw-la catholicorum_n anglorum_fw-la utilitatem_fw-la imprimatur_fw-la antuerpiae_fw-la 5._o augusti_fw-la m._n dc_o xlii_o richardus_n wake_v i._n v._o l._n cap._n 4._o cap._n 5._o cap._n 2._o cap._n 8._o cap._n 7._o cap._n 6._o cap._n 22._o 22._o note_v this_o great_a &_o most_o certain_a truth_n truth_n many_o use_v to_o repeat_v the_o creed_n in_o the_o presence_n and_o as_o in_o the_o person_n of_o such_o as_o be_v near_o expire_a by_o way_n of_o fortefy_v they_o at_o that_o time_n against_o the_o temptation_n of_o the_o devil_n devil_n when_o person_n be_v near_o expire_a attendant_n use_v to_o be_v very_o
resolut_o affirm_v he_o to_o be_v that_o person_n as_o if_o i_o have_v see_v he_o but_o yet_o now_o in_o this_o other_o case_n i_o can_v for_o here_o there_o be_v imprint_v so_o clear_a a_o notice_n of_o he_o in_o the_o mind_n without_o see_v he_o that_o it_o seem_v a_o kind_n of_o impossibility_n to_o doubt_v it_o for_o our_o lord_n will_v have_v it_o so_o engrave_v upon_o the_o understanding_n that_o it_o can_v no_o more_o be_v question_v then_o even_o that_o which_o we_o see_v no_o nor_o yet_o so_o much_o for_o in_o thing_n which_o we_o see_v there_o remain_v sometime_o a_o suspicion_n whether_o we_o may_v not_o have_v fancy_v such_o a_o thing_n and_o so_o mistake_v it_o but_o here_o though_o upon_o the_o sudden_a and_o as_o it_o be_v by_o way_n of_o surprise_n one_o may_v begin_v to_o fall_v upon_o a_o kind_n of_o suspicion_n or_o doubt_v yet_o still_o upon_o the_o whole_a matter_n we_o remain_v in_o so_o great_a a_o certainty_n as_o that_o the_o doubt_n continue_v not_o to_o have_v place_n and_o so_o also_o do_v it_o fall_v out_o though_o yet_o in_o a_o different_a manner_n that_o god_n instruct_v the_o soul_n &_o speak_v to_o it_o but_o yet_o without_o speak_v at_o all_o in_o such_o sort_n as_o i_o have_v already_o declare_v this_o be_v a_o certain_a kind_n of_o language_n which_o have_v so_o much_o of_o the_o celestial_a in_o it_o that_o it_o can_v well_o be_v give_v to_o be_v understand_v by_o we_o here_o how_o much_o soever_o we_o may_v desire_v it_o unless_o our_o lord_n himself_o be_v please_v to_o teach_v it_o by_o experience_n for_o our_o bless_a lord_n convey_v and_o place_n that_o in_o the_o most_o interior_a part_n of_o the_o soul_n which_o he_o be_v please_v that_o the_o same_o soul_n shall_v understand_v and_o know_v and_o there_o do_v he_o represent_v it_o without_o either_o any_o image_n of_o his_o person_n or_o any_o form_n of_o word_n but_o only_o after_o the_o way_n of_o that_o kind_n of_o vision_n which_o i_o have_v already_o touch_v and_o now_o let_v this_o manner_n of_o almighty_a god_n make_v the_o soul_n understand_v what_o he_o will_v in_o the_o way_n of_o great_a truth_n and_o mystery_n be_v much_o observe_v for_o many_o time_n that_o which_o i_o understand_v when_o our_o lord_n declare_v any_o vision_n which_o his_o divine_a majesty_n be_v please_v to_o represent_v to_o i_o be_v after_o this_o manner_n and_o i_o think_v it_o be_v in_o such_o occasion_n as_o where_o the_o devil_n be_v least_o able_a to_o intermeddle_v or_o intrude_v himself_o for_o these_o reason_n and_o if_o they_o be_v not_o find_v i_o be_o likely_a enough_o to_o be_v deceive_v now_o this_o kind_n of_o vision_n and_o language_n be_v so_o inward_o a_o thing_n of_o spirit_n that_o here_o there_o be_v no_o kind_n of_o spring_v or_o even_o stir_v in_o any_o of_o the_o power_n of_o the_o mind_n nor_o yet_o in_o any_o of_o the_o sense_n of_o the_o body_n in_o my_o opinion_n by_o which_o mean_n the_o devil_n may_v be_v able_a to_o make_v himself_o the_o gainer_n thus_o i_o say_v it_o happen_v sometime_o as_o namely_o when_o it_o last_v but_o a_o very_a little_a while_n for_o at_o some_o other_o time_n i_o think_v that_o neither_o the_o power_n of_o the_o mind_n be_v suspend_v nor_o yet_o the_o sense_n of_o the_o body_n disable_v but_o that_o they_o be_v all_o at_o home_n and_o in_o use_n the_o other_o happen_v not_o always_o in_o this_o degree_n of_o contemplation_n but_o rather_o very_o seldom_o i_o say_v that_o when_o they_o be_v so_o lose_v we_o neither_o operate_v any_o thing_n nor_o do_v any_o thing_n but_o all_o seem_v to_o be_v the_o work_n of_o our_o lord_n it_o be_v as_o when_o a_o food_n be_v already_o convey_v into_o the_o stomach_n without_o either_o our_o have_v eat_v it_o or_o so_o much_o as_o know_v who_o lay_v it_o there_o but_o only_o we_o understand_v well_o that_o there_o it_o be_v though_o in_o that_o case_n it_o be_v neither_o know_v what_o the_o food_n be_v nor_o who_o carry_v it_o thither_o but_o here_o it_o be_v very_o differet_fw-la for_o here_o the_o food_n be_v know_v though_o yet_o how_o it_o get_v thither_o i_o can_v tell_v for_o neither_o do_v i_o see_v it_o nor_o understand_v it_o nor_o be_v i_o ever_o move_v to_o desire_v it_o nor_o have_v it_o ever_o come_v to_o my_o knowledge_n before_o that_o such_o a_o thing_n can_v possible_o be_v in_o the_o speech_n upon_o which_o i_o touch_v before_o almighty_a god_n make_v the_o understanding_n observe_v and_o reflect_v upon_o that_o which_o be_v say_v whether_o it_o desire_v to_o understand_v or_o no._n for_o there_o it_o seem_v that_o the_o soul_n have_v some_o other_o kind_n of_o eat_v wherewith_o to_o hear_v &_o that_o he_o make_v she_o harken_v and_o not_o the_o while_n to_o think_v of_o somewhat_o else_o as_o if_o one_o who_o can_v hear_v well_o be_v not_o suffer_v to_o stop_n his_o ear_n and_o that_o they_o cry_v out_o aloud_o to_o he_o who_o will_v therefore_o be_v fain_o to_o hear_v they_o whether_o he_o will_v or_o no_o but_o somewhat_o in_o fine_a he_o do_v since_o he_o be_v attentive_a to_o understand_v what_o they_o say_v but_o here_o the_o soul_n do_v inst_n nothing_o for_o even_o that_o little_a which_o be_v do_v in_o the_o former_a way_n and_o which_o be_v only_o to_o harken_v be_v take_v from_o she_o now_o for_o now_o she_o find_v all_o dress_v to_o her_o hand_n yea_o and_o all_o eat_v by_o she_o too_o so_o that_o now_o there_o be_v nothing_o to_o be_v do_v by_o she_o but_o to_o enjoy_v just_o so_o as_o any_o one_o who_o without_o ever_o have_v learn_v or_o so_o much_o as_o endeavour_v to_o read_v and_o much_o more_o without_o any_o study_v at_o all_o shall_v find_v that_o whole_a science_n already_o possess_v by_o himself_o and_o that_o without_o know_v at_o all_o either_o how_o or_o whence_o it_o come_v since_o he_o have_v never_o procure_v to_o acquire_v it_o with_o so_o much_o as_o learn_v his_o a._n b._n c._n and_o this_o last_o comparison_n i_o think_v declare_v some_o part_n of_o this_o celestial_a gift_n for_o the_o soul_n find_v herself_o here_o to_o be_v grow_v wise_a upon_o a_o sudden_a and_o that_o the_o mystery_n of_o the_o most_o holy_a trinity_n and_o other_o most_o sublime_a article_n be_v so_o exact_o declare_v to_o she_o that_o there_o be_v not_o any_o theologue_n or_o divine_a in_o the_o world_n with_o who_o she_o may_v not_o adventure_v to_o dispute_v concern_v the_o truth_n of_o those_o high_a point_n the_o soul_n remain_v here_o in_o such_o a_o amazement_n that_o some_o one_o such_o favour_n as_o this_o suffice_v to_o work_v a_o total_a change_n in_o she_o and_o to_o make_v her_o love_n nothing_o but_o only_o he_o who_o without_o any_o labour_n at_o all_o of_o she_o have_v make_v her_o capable_a of_o so_o unspeakable_a blessing_n and_o to_o who_o he_o communicate_v his_o secret_n and_o who_o he_o treat_v with_o argument_n of_o so_o great_a and_o dear_a friendship_n and_o love_n that_o they_o soul_n endure_v not_o so_o much_o as_o to_o be_v write_v for_o he_o do_v some_o such_o kind_n of_o favour_n as_o may_v even_o bespeak_v a_o kind_n of_o suspicion_n and_o doubt_v in_o the_o hearer_n in_o regard_n that_o they_o be_v of_o so_o great_a admiration_n and_o have_v be_v impart_v to_o a_o person_n who_o have_v deserve_v they_o so_o very_o ill_o and_o in_o fine_a if_o we_o bring_v not_o a_o very_a livelie_a and_o even_o lusty_a faith_n with_o we_o they_o can_v be_v believe_v and_o therefore_o i_o resolve_v to_o speak_v of_o few_o of_o those_o which_o our_o lord_n have_v be_v please_v to_o vouchsafe_v i_o unless_o i_o be_v express_o command_v and_o unless_o it_o be_v of_o some_o few_o vision_n which_o perhaps_o may_v ferue_v to_o do_v good_a in_o some_o kind_n to_o the_o end_n that_o any_o such_o person_n as_o to_o who_o our_o lord_n may_v be_v please_v to_o impart_v the_o like_a may_v not_o wonder_v and_o think_v it_o impossible_a as_o i_o do_v or_o else_o that_o so_o i_o may_v declare_v the_o manner_n and_o way_n by_o which_o it_o have_v please_v our_o lord_n to_o conduct_v my_o soul_n that_o be_v the_o very_a thing_n which_o they_o have_v command_v i_o to_o write_v return_v therefore_o now_o to_o this_o manner_n of_o understand_v these_o kind_n of_o thing_n i_o think_v our_o lord_n be_v please_v that_o by_o all_o mean_n this_o soul_n of_o we_o shall_v have_v some_o notice_n here_o even_o of_o that_o which_o pass_v in_o heaven_n and_o that_o as_o soul_n do_v there_o understand_v one_o another_o real_o without_o speak_v which_o for_o my_o part_n i_o never_o know_v before_o and_o this_o be_v most_o certain_o true_a till_o our_o