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A35017 The Scotch Presbyterian eloquence, or, The foolishness of their teaching discovered from their books, sermons and prayers and some remarks on Mr. Rule's late Vindication of the kirk Curate, Jacob.; Calder, Robert, 1658-1723. 1692 (1692) Wing C6961; ESTC R10498 97,496 122

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and by Witnesses of unquestionable Honesty I can make it appear that he said If ever Christ was drunk upon Earth it was when he made the Lords Prayer And I appeal to your self who are a Ruling-Elder whether or not this be Blasphemy Some other things of Scandalous Nature I can prove against him O but says he we are not come here to Judge our Brethren our Business is with the Curates It is ordinary to hear their People say That if Christ were on Earth again he would think shame of that Form that they could make better themselves and that he was but young when he compos'd it All which Blasphemies must needs be the Effects or Consequent of what they hear from their Preachers And as for the Apostles Creed it is not so much as once mentioned at the Baptising of Infants for all that they require at Baptism is That the Father promise to breed up the Child in the Belief of the Westminster Confession of Faith and that he shall adhere to all the National Engagements laying on them to be Presbyterians Here I cannot forget what Mr. John Dickson Preacher in the Meeting-House at Kelso said once in a Sermon Ask said he an old dying Wife if she hath any Evidence of Salvation she will tell you I hope so for I believe the Apostles Creed I am taken with the Lord's Prayer and I know my Duty to the be Ten Commands But I tell you Sirs there are but old rotten Wheel-barrows to carry Souls to Hell These are Idols that the false Prelates and Curates have set up to obstruct the Covenant and the Work of God in the Land For reading the Scriptures in Churches they have abolished that with the rest and in place thereof he that raises the Psalm reads the Sermon that was preach'd the Sabbath before And for the Gospel Hymn called the Doxology or Gloria Patri they reject that as a superstitious prelatical Addition to the Word of God A certain Maid being lately Catechised by one of these Preachers the first question he propos'd to her was Maggi Now what think you are the Saints doing in Heaven I know not Sir O Maggy that is a very easie question answer it Maggy I think then said she they are doing that in Heaven which ye will not let us do on Earth What is that Maggy says he They are singing Glory to the Father Son and Holy Ghost Sir Now that is your Mistake Maggy said he for there 's no such malignant Songs sung there you have been quite wrong taught Maggy the Curates have deceived you Maggy They have no distinguishing Garb from Lay-men and yet they took upon them to admonish the King's Commissioner to their last Assembly for wearing a Scarlet Cloak and told him plainly That it was not decent for his Grace to appear before them in such a Garb upon which my Lord told them That he thought it as undecent for them to appear before him in gray Cloaks and Cravats When the Church of Arrol was last Year made Vacant by the Expulsion of the Reverend and Learned Dr. Niclson the Elders and Heritors there whereof many were Gentlemen of the best quality met together that according to the present Law and constant Practice of the Presbyterians they might chuse and call another Minister to be their Parson after they had unanimously agreed and sign'd and sent a formal Legal Call to Mr. Lisk a person of indisputable Qualifications for the Ministry in which he has been imploy'd with great Reputation for several Years in the North and one who has given signal Evidence of his good Affections to heir present Majesties my Lord Kinnard Chief Heritor went with the rest to signifie their Calling of Mr. Lisk to the Presbytery at my Lords entering into the place where the Presbytery was sitting he ask'd if they were the Ministers of the Presbytery Do not you see that we are said the Moderator My Lord replied That by their Garb no Body could know them and that their Spirit was invisible now whether it was for this Jest or because they knew Mr. Lisk to be Episcopal in his Judgment I know not but this I know that these grave New Gospellers rejected the Call in despite both of the Heritors and of their own Law brought in a Hot-headed Young Man of their own Stamp and Election However that they use no distinguishing Garb must be acknowledged to be very Congruous for truly they are but Laicks and it will surpass all their Learning to prove that they are Ministers of Jesus Christ but meerly Preachers sent and call'd by the People who are generally but very ill Judges of Mens Qualifications for the Ministry hence their constant and vast Heats and Divisions about their calling of able Men. The Mobile ordinarily take their Measures only from the appearances of things and indeed a Presbyterian Preachers Out-side is not his worst for they appear commonly though in Lay-garb yet in Sheeps-clothing but as we have often formerly so do we now feel that they are inwardly nothing but ravenous Wolves Now as to their Sermons which is the main design of this Paper they are still upon the Government and the Times preaching up the Excellency of their Kirk-Government which they call Christ the Crown Scepter and Government of Christ This was an old Custom among them to preach up the Times and the neglect thereof they call'd sinful Silence When in the former Confusions of the State they violently intruded themselves and Usurped the Government of the Church which they never had in settled Times In those Days at a publick Synod they openly reproved one Mr. Lighton for not preaching up the Times Who saith he doth preach up the Times It was answer'd That all the Brethren did it The says Mr. Lighton if all you preach up the Times you may allow one poor Brother to preach up Christ Jesus and Eternity But this was never not is like to be the Design of their Sermons for trace them in their Politicks Morals Mysticks and Metaphysicks you shall find them Selfish Singular and full of Nonsensick Rhapsodies These perhaps may seem hard Words but an Aethiopian must be painted black and that 's no sault in the Painter For their Politicks there is no Government under the Sun could tolerate them if they but act in other Nations as they have done in Scotland since their Intrusion there to instance but in our Times Did nor Mr. Cargill one of their Celebrated Preachers Excommunicate all the Royal Family the Bishops and Curates and all that should hear them and adhere to them They indeed that affect the Name of Sober Presbyterians disown'd these Hill-men particularly because they refused to join with them in thanking King James for the Toleration which he granted to them And yet such is the Disingenuity of these who would be called Sober Presbyterians that they cry out that they suffered Persecution whereas it was the Cameronians only whom they disown that
therefore that which idle onwaiting cannot do misnurtered crying and knocking will do Christ will not dance to your daft Spring Ibid. At our first Conversion the Lord putteth the Meat in young Bairns Mouths with his own hand We love always to have the Pap put in our Mouth Ibid. If my Creditor Christ would take from me what he hath lent I would not long keep the Causey I think it Manhood to play the Coward and jouke in the lee side of Christ and thus I am saved Ibid. I complain when Christ cometh he Cometh always to fetch Fire he is ever in haste hemay not tarry and poor I a beggarly Dyvar get but a standing Visit and a standing Kiss and but How dost thou in the by-going Epist 28. To Alexander Gordon of Knockraig O if I could be a Bridge over a Water for my Lord Jesus to walk upon and keep his Feet dry He can make a fair Feast out of a black Devil Ibid If God were dead and Christ buried and rotten among Worms indeed then we might look like dead folks Epist 34. To Earltown I would give him my Bond under my Faith to frist Heaven a hundred years longer so being he would lay his holy Face to my sometimes wet Cheeks Epist 35. To Marion Mac Naught Christ who is your Head hath win through with his Life howbeit not with a whole Skin Sometimes King Jesus sendeth me out a standing-drink and whispereth a word through the Wall and I am well content of kindness at the second hand his bode is ever welcome but at other times he will be Messenger himself and I get the Cup of Salvation out of his own hand he drinking to me and we cannot rest till we be in other's Arms. Epist 41. To my Lady Culross O to be snattering and swimming over Head and Ears in Christ's Love Blessed be my rich Lord Jesus who sendeth not away Beggers from his House with a toom-dish Epist 45. To John Keanedy It doth a Soul good to get a cuff with the lovely sweet and soft hand of Jesus what power and strength is in his Love I am perswaded it can climb up a steep Hill and Hell upon its back shame may confound and fear me once to hold up my black mouth to receive one of Christ's undeserved kisses Ep. 50. To James Bantie The best Regenerate have their defilements and if I may speak so their draff-pock that will clog behind them all their days if my Lord had not given me his love I would have fallen through the Causey of Aberdeen e're now but for you that hunger ye shall be filled e're you go there is as much in our Lord's Pantry as will satisfie all this Bairns and as much wine in his Cellar as will quench all their thirst I shall tell you what ye shall do treat him well give him the armed Chair and the board-head and make him welcome to the mean portion ye have Ep. 51. To John Stuart That miscarried Journey is with child to you of mercy and consolation and shall bring forth a fair birth and the Lord shall be midwife to the birth If our Lord ride upon a straw his Horse shall neither stumble nor fall Epist 53. To John Stuart Oh if my Lord will make dung of me to satten and make fertile his own corn-ridges in Mount Zion Ibid. God be pleased to take home in his house my Harlot-mother O if her Husband would be so kind as to go and fetch her out of the Brothel-house and chase her lovers to the hills but there will be sad days e're it come to that Epist 54 To my Lady Busby Wo's me that bits of living Clay dare come out to rush hard heads with him and that my unkind mother this Harlot Kirk hath given her sweet half-marrow such a meeting Epist 56. To Mr. Thomas Garvan I confidently believe that there is a Bed made for Christ and me and that we shall take our fill of love in it Epist 57. My riven dish and running-out vessel can hold little of Christ Jesus Ibid. It 's Christ's wisdom that his Bairns go wet-shod and cold-footed to Heaven Ep. 63. To the Earl of Cassils Many now would go to Heaven the Land-way for they love not to be Sea-sick riding up to Christ upon Foot-mantles and ratling Coaches and rubbing their Velvet with the Princes of the Land in the highest seats If this be the narrow way I quit all skill to the way of Salvation Ep. 89. to John Kennedy O that the Courts fenced in the name of the Bastard Prelates their Godfathers the Popes Bayliffs Sheriffs were cried down If this had not been I would have skinked over my part of Paradise for a breakfast of dead moth-eaten earth Ep. 92. To Mr. David Dickson I have been these two Sabbaths or three in private taking instruments in the name of God That my Lord Jesus and I have kissed each other in Aberdeen who can blame Christ to take me on behind him if I may say so on his white Horse thorow a water will not a Father take his little dated Davie in his arms and carry him over a Ditch or Mire my short legs could not step over this Lair or sinking mire and therefore c. Ep. 108. To Robert Gordon of Knoxbrex I love to be kissed and sit on Christ's knee but I cannot set my feet to the ground for afflictions bring the cramp upon my faith Ep. 118. To Bathia Aird At my first entry hither Christ and I agreed not well upon it now he 's content to kiss my black mouth to put his hand in mine and to feed me with as many consolations as would feed ten hungry souls yet I dare not say he is a waster of comforts Ep. 121. To Robert Gordon of Knocksbrek Christ seemeth to leave Heaven to say so and his Court and to come down to laugh and play and sport with a Daft bairn I deny nothing that the Mediator will challenge me of but I turn it all back upon himself let him look his own old Counts if he be angry for he will get no more of me Ep. 122. To Earleston There is a mystery of love in Christ that I never saw O that he would lay by the lap of the covering that is over it and let my greening soul see it I would break the door and be in upon him to get my womb full of love Ep. 128. To Mr. Hugh Henderson Christ shuffleth up and down in his hands the great Body of Heaven and Earth and Kirk and Commonwealth are in his hand like a stock of Cards and he dealeth the Play to the Mourners in Zion When Christ has sleeped out his sleep and his own are tried he will arise as a strong man after wine c. If Christ bud and grow green and bloom and bear seed again in Scotland and his Father send him two