strict examination satisfy her self that she 's able in this case to alledg more Reason and produce better Arguments to justify her Chastity than her Enemy can bring to accuse her Vertue before unconcern'd and unbyass'd Judges Let her therefore suppose the worst of her late dear Friend but now great Enemy that he should swear That he came often into her Chamber when she was alone in it in Bed and that she order'd and assign'd him that opportunity and conveniency that they might enjoy one another as they then did and to confirm the Truth of this Accusation he says she that was certainly so indiscreet as to allow the one might possibly be so unvertuous as to admit the other and alledges his being alone with her to back the Truth of what he now Swears and to publish the Folly of that she then did and farther adds That he can prove this her Indiscretion by her own act But she can never prove her Innocency when they were so alone by her own Words Therefore let her seriously reflect and consider how weak and slight her Defence must be against her Enemies sworn Accusation let her Wit be never so great and her Innocency never so clear since she cannot produce so much as one single Witness to confirm the Truth of what she says or to contradict the Truth of what he Swears having only her own bare Word and that in her own Cause and to defend her own Honour and Reputation which she has expos'd to Censure by the imprudent liberty she allow'd her then Friend either on the account of her too little Wit or too much Love or at least too great want of Discretion and Consideration I suppose she may make to his Accusation some kind of Defence of this nature That in the first place for his accusing her of suffering him to visit her at unusual visiting hours when she was alone in her Chamber in Bed that part she does not deny because she cannot well do it says 't was never but once and that once was meer accidental Secondly At the time he so visited her he swore he was and she verily believed him to be an honest Man and her real Friend as well as her long and intimate Acquaintance Thirdly She takes God The Searcher of all Hearts to be her Witness that she did not then or ever before or after act any thing with him in Thought Word or Deed that was not truly vertuous and purely innocent which his Heart knows to be a real Truth as well as he knows what he swears to the contrary to be an errant malicious Lie And Lastly she says That scandalous Reports against Women of Quality and Reputation ought only to be credited by sober and prudent Persons but according to what they see themselves and not according to what they hear from others because 't is in the power of any wicked Man to raise and cast scandalous Reports on the most vertuous Woman in the World All this I grant a Woman may alledge in her own Defence and Justification which I cannot esteem much because she could not well say less First as to his Accusation of her suffering him to visit her when she was alone in Bed at unusual visiting hours as to her Answer that 't was altogether undesignedly and accidentally and that 't was never but once and that she was fully resolv'd it should never be so a second time To this part of her Justification it may be answered That granting the Judges should take her own bare Word For she can give no more that what she says is a real Truth yet it may be objected That a Woman that will allow her self to do one act of Indiscretion in her carriage towards a Man it may be indeed a reasonable inducement to believe she may be perswaded to commit another But to draw an Argument that tho' she committed one act of Indiscretion yet we are to credit her bare word that she will never be brought to commit a second is but a weak and an irrational Conclusion for if a pure sense of Honour and true Love of Reputation regulates all a Woman's Actions and Carriage towards all Men as certainly it ought that Woman would never be so imprudent as to allow one freedom to her favorite Friend at any time which she could not honourably own and publickly justify at all times and in all Places and Companies in case her Friend should become her Enemy but indeed most Women are too apt to mistake the difference between the word Lover and the thing Friend for they will have them to be both one and the same thing when in deed they are very oft'n far from being so for tho' every true Friend must be a true Lover yet every pretending Lover is not a true Friend as many Ladies can Witness by woful Experience But if Venus Love had then the predominant Power over her Inclinations as it certainly has over many Women towards the favourite Man of her present fancy it may be better and much more rationally argued That the same amorous Inclination which at that time over-ruled her Discretion by admitting him one freedom more than she should might as well at another time over-power her Discretion by admitting him a second liberty more than she ought for she that commits one act of indiscretion shews by it a probability that she may be prevail'd with to act a second but no impossibility against her being perswaded to commit a third Next as to that part of her justification That the Man that did visit her when she was alone in her Chamber in Bed at an unusual visiting hour 't was never but once and that once was by one she verily believed to be her true faithful Friend as well as her long and old Acquaintance But to this it may well be answered That 't is very common for great Friends to prove great Enemies and often the greater Enemies for having been great Friends as the Weight of a Pendulum Clock falls the more backward for being shoved the more forward And this I am sure that there can be no Friendship in the whole World that is so loosely Tack'd on as that between a Man and a Woman on a meer Beauty Account which must of course be destroy'd by Death impair'd by Sickness and may be broken in pieces by a Thousand Accidents Witness that common one of a Man growing to like another Woman better than his Mistress or she to fancy another Man better than him a common Fate that attends most Beauty-Lovers and so they grow to dislike one another for great Beauty tho' it often creates great Fondness yet it seldom contains a long constant Love For as Beauty is pleasing so 't is Clogging and we know that the finest Sweet Meats make the foulest Surfeits For there we find it very usual among our young Gallants that tho' one of them has in a manner forsaken his Mistress yet that Man cannot indure to
DISCOURSES Useful for the Vain Modish Ladies AND THEIR GALLANTS Under these following Heads viz. I. Of some of the Common Ways many Vertuous Women take to lose their Reputation c. II. Of meer Beauty-Love c. III. Of young Mens Folly in adoring young handsom Ladies c. IV. Of the Power Womens Beauty exercises over most young Men. V. Of the Inconstancy of most Ladies especially such as are cry'd-up Beauties c. VI. Of Marriage and of Wives who usurp a Governing Power over their Husbands VII Of the Inequality of many Marriages with the sad End that usually attend such Matches VIII Against Maids marrying for meer Love c. IX Against Widows marrying X. Against keeping of Misses XI Of the Folly of such Women as think to shew their Wit by Censuring of their Neighbours XII Of the French Fashions and Dresses c. XIII Of Worldly Praises which all Ladies love to receive but few strive to deserve XIV Useful Advices to the vain modish Ladies for the well regulating their Beauty and Lives By the Right Honourable FRANCIS Lord Viscount Shannon Printed for J. Taylor at the Ship in S. Paul's Church-yard 1696 The Epistle Dedicatory To the Right Honourable ELIZABETH Countess of Northumberland MADAM MY Lady P. acquainted me 't was your Desire which is still to me a Command that I should send you this small Book of Discourses and Essays And tho' I know many of the Subjects they treat of to be light and trivial yet I immediately concluded tho' none of these Discourses are worthy your reading yet all your Commands are worthy my obeying and I had much rather the World should know I write ill than you Madam should have the least thought I obey you so And I humbly beg you to believe Madam that I do not present you this Book upon any dependency I have of it's merit but meerly to publish the obligations I owe you which I must ever want ability to requite but shall never lack justice to acknowledge And I hope Madam you will be the more easily perswaded to pardon this great confidence when you consider that self-interest now governs this World and since a a King can raise and illustrate one of his meanest Subjects and render him Honourable by declaring him such so Madam tho' this is one of the meanest Books Dedicated to you yet if you will be pleased to raise and honour it with your countenance it cannot but thrive under so great noble a Patronage And pray Madam do not think I write this Book out of any hope to shew some Wit when really I never so much as thought of it but meerly to publish the great honour I have for you and how humble a Servant I am to you And you know Madam 't is as well a Mark of Sovereignty to have one's Image stampt upon a Penny as a Guinea the meanness of it's value nor the smallness of it's Image not at all lessening the great power of the Prince it represents No more can I Madam by placing your great Name to this small Book in which your Virtues being only meanly set off and painted but in Dead colours can lessen and eclipse your high worth and splendid merits I know Madam there are many great Ladies that keep alive in the Root the Title of their noble and ancient Families but indeed there are very few that now-a-days bring any addition of Honour to their House But all know Madam that you not only keep alive in the Root but your Merits spring and flourish in all your Actions both to your own and Families Great Honour and Reputation for you not only live to the height of greatness that any of the English Nobility now do but to the height of Piety that any of the Primitive Christians ever did for you make it your great delight to read God's Laws and your main concern to keep his Commandments never striving to procure a high place in Court but to secure a good one in Heaven still courting the good not the great never flattering the powerful always praising the Virtuous being only a Servant to the Servants of God and not Courtier-like an humble Servant in Words to all scarce in deed a true Friend to any who seldom speak what they think and rarely perform what they promise their words being commonly not the Interpreters but Disguisers of their Thoughts But Madam you still kept your self in a kind of religious retirement out of the false and glittering Scenes of the Court and not only from the common Vices and Vanities of England but from the Foppish Modes high Extravagances of France which were just upon being naturaliz'd here in England And indeed you differ from most Ladies for they love much to receive Praises but strive little to deserve them but you Madam strive to deserve them but love not to receive them your great Humility adding a lustre to your high Quality and your high Quality adding a lustre to your true Humility and a blessing too for God still gives Grace to the humble I shall not here trouble you much Madam with a Character of the vain idle Vitioso Fopps of our time nor here make it my business to set out the vain modish Ladies of our age since both make it their main concern to set out themselves tho' in a very bad Figure but my design here is that because I did in my Youth perswade some young Wives to do what they ought not I would now in my old age perswade all young Wives and Women to do what they ought which is To remember their Creator in the Days of their Youth and to strive more for the true lasting Beauty of Holiness than the slight fading one of a fine Face which is only a meer out-side Beauty but the Beauty of Holiness is like the King's Daughter all glorious within which will bring one an agreeable satisfaction whilst one lives and a sweet peace of Conscience when one Dies The other but high and proud vain thoughts whilst her Beauty lives and sad Frettings and Discontents when she finds it dies for usually as the Mistresses Beauty leaves her so her Lovers Love leaves him for Effects will follow their Cause And tho' many of the vain Modish Ladies are guilty of Pride Vanity and perhaps what 's worse than both yet most of them are so self-conceited of their own merit as they had rather judg the World Censorious than themselves faulty like the Philosopher that lost his sight and yet would not believe himself blind but that the Room was Dark And now Madam being towards the end of my Letter I shall speak as all Christians do or at least ought to do at the ending of their Lives which is to speak the truth from the bottom of their Heart as I am sure I now do by saying your Virtuous Life exemplary Piety and your extraordinary Charity which is not like that of most great Ladies whose bounty extends no
The Second Discourse 〈◊〉 meer Beauty-Love with some of the vile Arts and wicked Deceits many Gallants use to ruin their Mistresses Reputation under a false pretence of true Friendship And of the great folly of such VVomen who delight in censuring others but slight all others censuring them because they fancy they do not deserve it with some useful Advices thereon p. xxxii The Third Discourse Of young Mens great folly in adoring and over-praising all young handsom Ladies and their greater vanity in receiving it and believing them p. 1 The Fourth Discourse Of the extraordinary governing power VVomens Beauty now exercises over most young Men. p. 21 The Fifth Discourse Of the Inconstancy most Ladies especially such as are cry'd up Beauties and the folly of any Man that believes he 's fully acquainted with and soley possess'd of a vain Beauties Heart and can give good reasons for the various Motions of her Love-changes p. 42 The Sixth Discourse Of Marriage and of VVives who usurp a Govering Power over their Husbands which is now so common as 't is almost become the general Grievance of the Nation p. 5â— The Seventh Discourse Of the inequality of many Marriages awd of the Inconstancy of most VVives that Men Marâ—â—â— for meer Beauty or their Parents Match forbaâ— Mony with the sad end that usually attends suâ— Matches p. 6â— The Eighth Discourse Against Maids Marrying for meer Love or only 〈◊〉 please their Parents Inclinations tho' quite contrary to their own p. 8â— The Ninth Discourse Against VVIDOVVS Marrying p. 9â— The Tenth Discourse Against keeping of MISSES p. 11â— The Eleventh Discourse Of the vain Folly of such VVomen as think to sheâ— their VVit by Jeering at and Censuring of their Neighbours p. 12â— The Twelfth Discourse Of the French Fassions and Dresses lately us'd 〈◊〉 England by the modish Ladies and your sparks p. 13â— The Thirteenth Discourse Of VVorldly Praises which all Ladies love to receive but few strive to deserve and the sad eâ— of it and them when they come to Die p. 15â— The Fourteenth Discourse Vseful advices in order to the vain modish Ladies we Regulating their Beauty and Lives p. 17â— THE FIRST DISCOURSE Of some of the common ways many vertuous Wives take to lose their Reputation tho' they keep their Chastity being vertuous in their inward Intentions but indiscreet in their Talk and outward Actions and Men judge by what they see not by what Women say they mean I Shall not here Reader pretend to present you with the Sum Total of the numerous and various Ways many handsom Women take to be ill talk'd of for that I am sure would be a Task as much above my Power to write as I fancy 't would be above your Patience to read and he that can perform that great work must need at least a Prophet's Knowledge and a Job's Patience and truly I pretend to neither Nor have I so much as a Thought of undertaking singly to tell you all the Faults Arts Deceits and Indiscretions of all Wives much less of all Women since I fancy if all the Husbands in the whole World were assembled in one general Council they could no more sum up all their Wive's Faults than cure all their Vices for Miracles are ceas'd to the whole World but the Papist of whose Faith I thank God I am not of But of this opinion I am that 't is sufficient for every Married Man to carry his own Burden and Proportion in the Matrimonial Yoke with Discretion and Patience which latter is a Vertue their Wives will be sure to make them practise if they be not more fortunate than the generality of Husbands are and I think ever will be if one may judge of the future by the present I shall name but few and write but little of the many and several ways diverse virtuous I do not say discreet Wives take to be ill talked of and shall here skip troubling you with a Character of a vile sort of scandalous Wives that are commonly known and publickly branded for such who have by their wicked Lives render'd themselves so contemptible as they are to be us'd by all vertuous Women as we do persons infected with the Plague We are not bound to go see how they do but we are oblig'd to avoid coming where they are both for our own sake and the sake of others and to remember to observe Solomon's good Advice as to a vertuous Woman's carriage towards an ill scandalous Woman Remove thy way far from her and come not near the door of her House These are a sort of beastly Women that take upon them the vile employment of common censuring and publick rayling at all strict Vertuous Women arming themselves with downright Impudence having lost all their shame with their Vertue for they that part with the one soon casts off the other And because they have render'd themselves contemptible by their ill Lives they strive to make good Women appear bad by their foul Tongues scandalizing the Vertues by all the ill Reports they can invent being like those Solomon names Who cannot sleep without having done some mischief being so abominably bad as their very Parents for Friends they have none want Confidence to excuse them and they Impudence to justify themselves These Herd of beastly Women the Vertuous are bound in Charity to pity their bad Condition but in Prudence to shun their ill Company and so I 'll leave them with a red Cross on their Door and a Lord have mercy on their bad lives The first sort of Wives I shall here name and but name are a kind of Wives that have the Happiness to be thought vertuous by many but the Unhappiness to be esteem'd vain and indiscreet by most they are careful to keep themselves Chast but careless of what others say against their being so and because they think they do no ill value not what ill others say they do which is but a sad sort of Logick and an ill way of managing their Reputation since tho' a Wive's Innocency may satisfy her own Conscience yet it cannot protect her Husband's Honour nor secure her own since publick Censure may blemish both if an outward discreet carriage doth not prevent Therefore doubtless a Wife who is truly vertuous and truly desires to be esteem'd such is as much concern'd in Honour to keep a good Name as she is bound in Conscience to lead a good Life and the Wife which in point of Reputation values little what others say seldom care much what she her self doth for what bad Censures she casts on others or others cast on her and a Wife or Woman of that ill Temper usually loves more to commit a hundred faults than to repent of one or be told of any never considering that a handsom Woman's leaving a Vice argues no defect in her Body but a vertuous inclination in her Mind For the very best Women in the World are subject to Faults and Errors as well
see her Love another Man and 't is ten to one she cannot indure to be without another Man to Love and this creates Anger and Revenge in her first Lover and perhaps provokes him to cast out Words that may highly reflect on her Honour so vile and ill-natur'd is our present Age as most Men are much readier to revenge a meer fancied Injury than to requite a real received Obligation And if a Wife that allows a Man the freedom of visiting her when she is alone in Bed at unusual visiting Hours will but truly own the secret Thoughts of her Heart I am confident she cannot deny but that one of the principal Motives that induced her to grant her Lover that imprudent Freedom was much occasion'd on this vain and foolish account That she hoped by her allowing extraordinary Liberty to him it would produce extraordinary Returns of Kindness to her Which is but a simple Fancy since that Woman that enlarges her Favours and Freedoms to a Man beyond the just Bounds and Limits of a prudent modest and a decent Carriage tho' that Man may in Heat of Blood seemingly embrace them with an eager Fondness and a passionate Delight yet if he be either a Lover of Vertue or a Master of Reason he cannot but in his own Judgment despise her for it and conclude by her granting such over-large Liberties to him it savors more of hot Love than true Friendship and he cannot but in reason judge That as her present fond Love makes her now grant to him more Freedom than is decent so she may in a little time as well shew more Kindness to another than is discreet For Beauty-love cannot be built upon any settl'd firm Foundation but on a Hill of Sand which looks high but stands weak nor is it rais'd and maintain'd by true Reason or pure Friendship but rather hangs by Geometry that is depends on a meer flashy airy amorous Fancy as little durable as Summers Rain or Winters Sun and therefore that Person she fancies most she will be sure to love best and be fondest of and kindest to during the present amorous Fit And for that Wife taking God the searcher of all Hearts to be her Witness That she never acted with that Man that accuses her any thing but what was truly Vertuous Indeed she does well to take the God of Heaven to be her Witness for she can have none on Earth except the Man that Witnesseth against her And therefore I shall desire her seriously to consider how is it possible to judge of a Woman 's inward Intentions but by her outward Actions and if they be indiscreet how can any justly say her inward intentions are not so since none can judge of the one but by the other For we are to believe according to what we see and not according to what we hear or the Woman vows she means which unless to God the Searcher of all Hearts can be only known to her self and consequently she can only be a credible Witness to her self and not others as to her own inward intentions Lastly for the excuse she alledges That it lies in the Power of any wicked Man to raise and cast scandals on the Reputation of the most Vertuous Woman on Earth as that she admitted such a Man to visit her when she was alone in her Chamber a Bed when perhaps she never saw him out of it much less he her in it having never possibly heard his Name much less knew his Person These kinds of Reports I grant lie in the power of every wicked Man to raise on any Vertuous Woman But I deny 't is in the Power of every wicked Man to make a Vertuous Woman say she admitted him to visit her alone in Bed when she never did and to own an indiscreet Act which she never committed Indeed I have known many wicked Men disown ill things that they have done but I never heard of a discreet Woman own an ill thing she never did so that I think it needless to write any more than That I look upon such groundless scandals so falsly rais'd and shot at Random at a good Woman's Reputation to be only able to shew a malicious Man's ill Nature not justly to brand a Vertuous Woman's good Name But I fear I have already not only writ too much but too sharp on this Nice Subject therefore I shall only give this good tho old Advice to all vertuous Wives which is still to use an Enemy as if he may become a Friend and a Friend especially in love matters as if he may become an Enemy that is a prudent Woman ought not to shew too much Kindness to the one nor declare too fierce a Hatred against the other but to manage with Discretion and Moderation her carriage to both and to admit Piety Vertue and due Consideration to regulate all her Actions and she that observes these good Measures will be sure never to admit any Person especially a Lover any private freedom which she cannot honourably own and publickly justify Farther a Vertuous Woman ought still to carry in her Mind That she is bound to satisfy all Persons as to her Vertue as well as her self others Tongues as well as her own Heart Nor ought a vertuous Maid or Wife to depend much upon her Lover's Vows or Oaths of a true and constant Love and a perfect unalterable Friendship since most of their Vows and Love Oaths being built upon fading Beauty which is but a Sandy Foundation their Friendship commonly moulders away with the Beauty that created it I shall therefore advise all handsom vertuous Women not to depend much on their Lovers fair Words but on their own good Actions strict prudent Carriage and pure Vertuous Life and she that observes these good Measures will be sure not to shew too much Love or Hatred to any Man nor ever expose her Reputation to her Lover's Humor since by so doing she 's no longer his Queen and Mistress but his Subject and Servant by trusting her Humour into his Power and what is worse to his Mercy And Solomon the wisest of Men gives Men this good advise Advoid Suretyship and you shall be sure And the like Caution and Prudence also leads Women not to be bound for nor to trust in any Beauty-Lover's Oaths for this good reason That if you never trust him he can never deceive you but if you do he may And as 't is natural for all Women to hope the best so 't is discreet in all Women to fear the worst and to arm themselves against others bad Tongues as well as against their own ill Acts. And as Discretion must ever be a great Vertue among Women so Indiscretion must ever be a great Vice for all it 's being a great Mode I esteem Indiscretion to be much alike to Wickedness as Covetousness is to Evil which is not only an evil Root but the Root of all Evil. So Indiscretion is not that sole Issue
inconstant and undurable being as very fading as the Complexion 't is much compos'd of and chiefly illustrated with I wish this sort of Lovers would take into their serious Consideration where 's the real Satisfaction a Gallant can any way propose to himself to take in gazing on his Mistresses Beautiful Face since at best it can be but a momentary Eye-pleasure a thing next to nothing and as little lasting as 't is little worth so slight and sandy a Foundation is meer Beauty built on it being indeed only a fine bright burnish'd Clay inamell'd with pure white and red which by many of our fine Ladies now a-days is oftner bought with Money than given them by Nature and do but unmask the Skin of one of their Faces whether her Beauty 's bought or given and 't will certainly at first sight prove loathsom to ones Eyes and in a very little time noisom to the Smell being only fit for nasty Worms not fine Gallants Next let us suppose that an amourous young Gallant should be so prosperous and fancically happy as by the Expence of much time many Oaths and the Trial of a Thousand costly Effays to gain not only her free leave to behold her beautiful Face but to enjoy her beautiful Person In the first place 't is most certain That a Beauty-chase after a handsom Face is but like a Fox hunting Recreation which tho' you follow never so eagerly yet the pleasure lies only in the pursuit not in the taking of the Game Next I shall desire the young Gallant to ballance with the Pleasures he enjoys the many Troubles he must suffer by the several Fears Doubts Jealousies and vexatious Disappointments he must rencounter in the keeping and securing his new Conquest and sure there needs no stronger an Argument to prove both the uncertainty and difficulty of keeping his Mistress constant to himself than the easiness he found in perswading her to prove inconstant to another for on the same score that she left another for him she may leave him for another Next I shall desire this Beauty-Lover but to look into common Experience and 't will tell him That as he will certainly be soon cloy'd with her Face so he will be soon weary of her Body since he loves the last but for the first and sure no Man can be so ignorant in our wife amorous and Romantick Age as not to know that sweet Variety is now all in fashion and that Love like Beauty cannot always last because great Beauty it self never did nor never can And tho' most of our fine modish Ladies are as to the Gallantry of having a Gallant very constant yet as to the person of one Gallant most of them are very inconstant and changeable because one suits not with sweet Variety which is now become the common Mode great Delight and usual Practice of most young Gallants and their Mistresses Now last of all and indeed what 's worse and most strange of all let us suppose that our young Gallant 's Mistress should chance to prove vertuous which indeed is a chance and is fully and unalterably resolv'd to continue still so then must our hot fierce fiery Lover's eager desire after the enjoying her render his enflamed Heart to be here on earth as Dives his Soul was in Hell tormented with a Thirst never to be quenched that is whilst her Beauty lives or till his Love dies and indeed the best of it is both are mortal and neither long-liv'd In a word If we seriously search into the true Nature and common Effects that meer Beauty-Love usually produces we shall find 't is ordinarily accompanied with great Fears constant Jealousies and daily vexatious Disappointments which this sort of Beauty-Love is usually attended on tormented with and commonly expires in And truly Reader 't is only this sort of noisom Venus-Love and meer Beauty Friendship that I exclaim against having as I said before no mixture of Marriage-design Family-Obligation well-grounded Friendship or so much of Kindred-pretence as that of a Welsh Cousin to shelter and countenance their long Visits and great Familiarity But many Women fancy that the vertuous Name of Friendship excuse the scandalous one of Gallant never reflecting on the vast difference there is in the Carriage between a true pure Platonick Lover and a meer Beauty-Gallant's Friendship towards the Woman they pretend a real kindness to and a concern for since he that 's a Woman's true Friend indeed must make it his main Business and great Care so to order all his Looks Words and Actions that any way relate to that Woman he pretends and vows a true and vertuous Friendship for as to avoid giving all Persons the least Occasion or Umbrage to suspect he has any Design to be esteem'd her Beauty-admirer or pretended Gallant which is a Title a real Friend on the account of his true Friendship ought as much to avoid as a truly vertuous VVoman on score of her good Reputation ought truly to detest since 't is an undeniable truth That no Man can heartily loves a Womans Person that does not truly love and heartily endeavour to preserve her good Name and make her Honour part of his own Nay I am farther of opinion that no Man does love a Woman as a real perfect Friend that does not love her Reputation as much as if she were his real Wife that is to be a true Partner and joint-sharer in her good and bad Fame Whereas on the contrary a meer amorous Gallant is a Friend to a Woman meerly because she 's handsom and only loves her because her Beauty likes him and so is a concern'd party only as to her good or bad look's not her bad and good actions therefore he uses all his Arts and employs all his skill and endeavours to accomplish his wicked ends on her he so eagerly Courts and if her Piety and Virtue is so great as she will not suffer him to enjoy her yet his wicked design is so vile as to strive to make all Men believe he does it In a word this is the great difference between a true Friend and a Fop Gallant the first makes it his real design and hearty concern to preserve her Reputation whereas the Amorous Gallant makes it his grand business and sole aim to destroy it But most Ladies are so vain I had almost said foolish as to fancy they can defend themselves against all scandalous reflections on their Reputation by the great Strength of their Wit but really the strength of such vain Wit springs often but from the Weakness of their Judgment therefore I shall Caution that Woman who depend so much on the greatness of her own Wit to beware of two things the first is Not to rely too much on her own Wit The second not to depend too much on her Gallants Oaths lest both fail her For indeed 't is very common for young Women to have a better opinion of their own Wit than they ought and
conclude That he has either spoke ill of her Reputation or has acted some rudeness to her Person already or that she hath reason to fear he will do it hereafter and therefore has for bid him her Company either upon the account of revenge for what 's past or by the way of prevention for the time to come therefore I am clear of opinion a Woman ought not to forbid an old Friend and Acquaintance visiting her except it be upon one of these two nam'd Accounts or else upon the score that she has reason to believe her Husband does not well rellish his coming so often to her and if that be the Business if this her Friend be what he really pretends to be and she seems to believe he is he cannot justly take it ill that she freely tells him That his visiting her so constantly tho' their Converse be never so Vertuous and Innocent yet she has some cause to fear it has or may if long continued raise her Husbands Dislike and the Worlds Censure therefore to prevent both and secure her own Quiet and good Reputation she friendly desires him for the future to make his Visits shorter and seldomer to stop all busy ill-natured Censurers Tongues and any Jealousies their malicious Twatlings might raise in her Husbands Mind And sure if this her dear esteemed Friend truly deserves that Title he must value her Honour as part of his own and make her Content his Satisfaction since she freely and heartily assures him 't is not at all upon the account of her lessening her true Esteem and Friendship for him but meerly to secure her Husbands Love and Kindness to her that she desires this of him Next I shall advise that Woman who stands so much on her inward Vertue as to slight her Friends Advice and the Worlds Censure for keeping her Friend so much company seriously to consider That 't is above the power of any Mortal to dive into a Womans inward Thoughts and that Men can only behold her outward Actions not inward Intentions For tho' Men can see her Lips move when she whispers yet they cannot tell what she speaks when she does so Much less are they able to dive into either of their Meanings for that 's so great a secret as one of them may deceive the other with for all their Vows and Oaths of an open Heart a true Love and an unalterable Friendship I could name a thousand Arts Slights and Deceits that many Gallants use to their Mistresses but I am sure I should sooner tire my Readers Patience with their great numbers than by their great numbers to confirm his belief of their great Truth except it be the Truth of their great Folly and vile Falsity for indeed most of the young Gallants of our present sober and Vertuous Age do commonly in their Courtship to their present Mistresses carry little Truth in their Heart but many more Romantick Lies on their Tongues than Teeth in their Mouth And now Reader pray give me leave to change a little the Scene of my Discourse of the great Beauty of the Mistresses to add a word of the great and wicked actings of some of their Gallants who having tried all arts and means they could invent to gain their Mistresses Heart I still except Marriage and after all their Essays find it so strongly fortified and fully Garrison'd with Vertue and Piety as they see it impregnable against all their Batteries and Assaults so as to cast themselves into an utter despair of ever gaining their wicked ends on them I say can any Man of common Sense not think it full time for him to found a Retreat as to following their Persons tho' he cannot leave admiring their Beauty Indeed I have ever observed that Importunity still breeds Trouble but I never heard it ever created Love in a Mistress Yet this sort of wicked foolish Gallants are so indefatigable in the folly of their endless Pursuit after their Mistress as they will not believe they hate them tho' their Words and Actions declare their scorn and aversion to them but they will tell you what 's three Kicks of denial to a Lover that has read the Patience of Job or the sober Temper of Seneca or has often experimented the Inconstancy and Fickleness of an ill humored Mistress which perhaps exceeds both And therefore by way of Revenge he quickly resolves rather than be publickly ridiculed for missing his aim losing his time and not gaining his Mistress since he cannot enjoy her fair Person he will endeavour blasting her good Name and make the World believe she 's kind to him tho' she 's only really so to her own Virtue and Reputation by despising him and all his Courtship and the better to accomplish his base and treacherous Design on her he alters his Course changes his Battery and comes and throws himself at his Virtuous Mistresses Feet with the greatest seeming Joy imaginable That God has so blessed him as he is now become an intire religious Convert who has abandoned all the vain Pleasures of this World to contemplate the pure and endless Felicities of Heaven and that now instead of being a Slave to the Beauty of her Body he is become a devout well-wisher to the good of her Soul And intends to be so vile an Hypocrite and wicked a Sinner that since he could not gain her Body by all earthly means he resolves to flie to Heaven it self for a religious disguise to ruin her Reputation and satisfy his Revenge since he could not his Love and therefore he now only pretends to pure Piety strict Virtue true Humility much Gravity and great Penitency in all his Discourses and Actions I mean before her only and seriously and devoutly protesteth to her for in this Disguise he dares not Swear that he highly rejoyceth that all the Courtship he made and Perswasions he used served only to try her Humour not tempt her Virtue which he now highly rejoyces to find proof against all Temptations Vowing to her he is now more delighted with the true Virtue of her Mind than ever he was formerly taken with the great Beauty of her Face for the first is pure and Heavenly the last meer sensual the first relisheth of Angel-Love the second may and often does savour of meer brutal Lust And thus whilst he makes up all his Discourses in praising and magnifying her great Virtue to her self he uses all base oblique and subtle Endeavours and underhand Arts of Defamation to brand and blemish her good Name to all others and thus hopes to obtain his base revengful Ends by a Holy and Heavenly means And in pursuit of this his base wicked and Treacherous Design he entertains her with how highly he is delighted that he has quite stript himself of the Fools-Coat of a vain amorous Lover to Cloath himself with the pious sober Dress of a holy Convert and a Devout Christian and that he now does and ever will make it
find that the effects of Anger kill many more than the passion of Love Men being often Angry with many Men at once but never in Love with more than one Woman at a time and that one it self is too many by one But my design being not to Court the young Ladies with high Complements but to serve them with great reality I must assure them that these high praises the more they are trusted the more they 'll betray and the more you Ladies confide in their worth the more you 'll be deceiv'd in their value so that it follows by the plain Rule of common reason that so much as you deduct of Mens overpraises so much you lessen of your own self deceivings Indeed these poysoned Darts of praises have got such a predominant power over most young handsom Women and the most handsom are most subject to them that most of them are in danger of being wounded by them because the peril of flattery still mounts with the degrees of beauty as the Suns heat still increases proportionable as it rises Flattery and vain-glorious praises are both insinuating Devils two Twins begot by the father of Lies and these not only attempt all but possess most vain handsom Ladies and therefore they ought above all to be very strict and diligently active to shun such tempting discourse and avoid such dangerous Company or at least when with them to be sure still to carry about them S. James his good direction and antidote resist the Devil and he will flie from you Really if young Ladies would but take a steddy resolution to resist and slight all young Mens vain Courtships and place no such high estimation on their own beauty they would easily do the like on mens praises and by this means young Gallants would slacken in their Courtships proportionable to the young Ladies cooling in their receptions of it and so make Men despise Womens beauty suitable to their slighting Mens Love and thus Womens prudence would become Mens wisdom for in real truth 't is hope of gain makes love Merchants as well as others none watch Bees but for their Hony and few Court fair Ladies but for some hopes of a return and therefore you never hear of any of the young Sparks that plant their Love Batteries against Nunneries not because they think the young Women in them have too little beauty but because they believe they shall meet there with too great a resistance by the care they take and strictness they use to prevent Mens making any Addresses and near approaches to them for as Mr. Cowley says a well govern'd heart like rich China admits Men only to the Frontier part for a strict vertue sets certain bounds to young handsom Womens carriage and behaviour towards Men which they are not to exceed as the Almighty gave to the Sea so far you shall go and no farther And though I know there 's no such thing now adays in practice among our young Men as Angel Love which is the pure Commerce of the Souls yet I believe Venus Love does not rage so very much nor is its infection so very strong and rife as Censurers would fain have it making our Age much worse than 't is when God knows 't is but too bad at best as if the youth of both Sexes were now so corrupt as that a young Gentleman cannot visit a young Lady nor a young Lady receive visits from a young Gentleman without imputation of scandal or the censure of ill and vicious designs on both sides tho I verily believe some young Men I do not say all nor yet many love Womens company and Women Mens on no other account than for their great wit good humor and agreeable Conversation without any farther ends And now I am beginning to enter into that part of this Discourse which principally addresses it self to the handsom young Maiden Ladies and chiefly among them to such as are innocently and modestly bred for such sort of young Women often entertain discourses and make acquaintances with young Men without the least thought of love or design of ill many of them looking civilly and talking freely to them on no other account than to shew and exercise their wit and that may be more to please their own fancy than on design to take that of others but yet I must advise such young Women to consider that meer civil looks often tempt and refusals may be given after such a manner as may rather embolden one to ask more than to beg pardon for having asked too much for as one well observes of strict vertuous Women That Man comes too near to them that comes to be denied by them Indeed 't is not very rare now a days for civil looks in young Women to breed Adulterous thoughts in young Men for the Gospel tells us that there is an Adultery of the Eye and I am sure we ought all to remember with grief of mind that assoon as the Serpent had perswaded that the forbidden fruit was pleasant to the Eye it soon follow'd that it became delightful to the Tast if Mens Vows of Love and Oaths of Constancy can but once tempt young Maids appetites to taste 't will soon make them anticipate their fears to eat Therefore Ladies have a care of receiving Mens praises and flatteries and though you believe your own Vertue never so strong and yours Lovers Courtship never so innocent as possibly they may be at first received by you and design'd by him only as the effects of pure civility and not of any ill intention yet praises are so naturally agreeable to vain handsom Ladies as they often unperceiv'd insinuate and wind themselves so about their hearts as to kindle there by degrees Love likings though perhaps they do not feel so much as the least slight atome Love to creep on the superficies of their heart Love sometimes like a Tortoise makes its way though it does not seem to stir or like the hand of a Watch which though you cannot perceive to move yet you may plainly see its hourly advances Love often growing in young Womens minds as Diseases do in their bodies without ever giving the least Alarm or Advertisement of its approach till it breaks out into a dangerous fit of Sickness Solomon says a soft word breaks the Bone therefore no wonder if smooth praises and complements should charm a young Ladies tender heart for sure 't is no wonderful operation in our times for small freedoms like little Thieves to open the Doors to great Liberties and venial wantonness to turn to modish wickedness Therefore let me advise the vain Ladies not to deceive themselves in fancying that they are more invincible in their Love railleries in receiving praises from young Men than King Solomon was with dallying with strange Women which drew him into the Sin of Idolatry This example may serve as a Caution to young Ladies not to relie too much on their own strength for many Maids
sinful as 't is not making Images to adorn Churches but building Churches to worship Images that makes the Idolatry And since Recreation for the mind is as well necessary as Exercise for the body I see no reason why it may not be lawful for me to recreate my self now and then in an afternoon in such good young Womens company and conversation to hear their opinions and discourses which the rude sort of Men call Twatlings on the Stories of the place and their several fancies and judgments on the divers Fashions then worn who are the Women most talk'd of for whom and what beauties are highest cried up and which of them loves most and carries on an Intrigue best lives highest wears the richest Clothes keeps the finest Equipage and has most Gallants and this Gentlewoman is to be Married to that Gentleman who in a little time will find her Debts much greater than her Beauty or Portion either and such a pretty Maid is to be Married by a Match of her Parents making to such a one in whom she will be very unhappy her heart being prepossessed by another and such an old Man is jealous of his young Wife without a Cause and such a young Man is not jealous of his handsom Wife with one and the like Subjects which I grant in severe strictness may be truly call'd an omission in not spending our time so well as we ought which I look upon to be more a venial vice than an unpardonable sin and therefore do not believe that the knowledge of my infirmity ought to be the despair of my Recovery but I am truly pleas'd that all unlawful designs and unchast desires as to Women are banished from my heart and that Vertue has made me quite leave them before Age has made them quite leave me But 't is more than time to finish this Discourse for I have dwelt longer on it than I intended but the trouble of it I hope the Ladies will the more easily pardon since 't is not only a fault but a habit that I have been much subject to and long infected with which is to be loth to part with young Womens Company when I am once got into it and therefore I will conclude this Discourse with this Complement to the Ladies that I heartily wish it may prove as satisfactory and advantagious to them as to make them all now as fond of piety as I was once of beauty and that they may continue to love it as many years as I did them and then I dare assure them this double blessing That they shall neither live ill nor die young THE FOURTH DISCOURSE Of the extraordinary governing Power that Womens Beauty now exercises over most Men. BLess me and deliver me What a strange Subject do I now fall on and into what a vast Sea am I now Imbarking The Bay of Biskay with all its proud swelling waves is but as a calm pond to it for that only tosses Ships into the Air and presently brings them down again but this Subject elevates my Pen above the Skie and there leaves it for Womens governing Power has no certain Top nor Bottom but Circle-like is without beginning or end How can it possibly be then describ'd it being a meer Maze of difficulties and a Labyrinth of Confusions in which it has made so many cross Paths of pride and folly vanity and power as I know not which to take or which to leave where to advance or how to retreat And yet I find in my self an earnest inclination to venture on it though I am sure to be lost in it for I must expect that this dull and short Discourse on the voluminous Subject of beauties mighty power can have no other fate than that of Rivers which still run with an eager haste though it be only to plunge themselves into the Sea in which they are presently lost Story tells us of some English Frigats that sail'd up to Constantinople and were there so generally admir'd that the great Turk himself went to see them and was very much taken with their beauty shape and strength and being told there were hundreds finer in England he commanded that the Map of the World should be presently brought him that he might see that brave Kingdom which produced such gallant effects the Map being come he laid his finger carelesly on it and ask'd whereabouts England was but the person that was to shew it him told him he could not do it till he took off his finger for it quite cover'd that Kingdom Thus one Inch of the Worlds Map serves to set out all Englands Confines but a hundred sheets of Paper cannot half describe the extraordinary bounds of Womens usurping power If I look up towards the height of it I am confounded at the sight of so bright and clear a Scene of meer sanciful Splendor and if I look downwards on it I meet in my Compass crowds of Adorers and Suitors thick prostrate at their feet some courting their great beauty others admiring their high power some begging their favour but most bribing their interest But though their beauty cannot at all dazle my sight yet this Subject do's indeed puzzle my Pen for really I am so far from knowing how to end this Discourse as I profess I know not yet where to begin it and indeed when I have writ all I can on it I fancy I can make no other than this whole sale judgment of it That beauties universal governing Power is of a miraculous nature like that of the Ebbing and Flowing of the Sea every body may daily see its strange effects but none can give a good reason for the true cause therefore I am sure my weakness ought not to attempt what the strength of wit and Philosophy could never perform So that I am resolv'd to venture on this Subject but as little Boys do on a great River not hazard far on it for fear of being lost in it but content themselves with wading a little on the Brink of it and there to dable and wash them out of the reach of its great depth and fierce stream And though I know that the cause of Mens so enslaving themselves to handsom Womens power cannot spring but from a mean slavish nature and so ought not to be look'd upon better by any considering Men than a kind of Kingdom in the Moon or Fairy Land only hatch'd by the fiery amorous Love of a high lustful and enflam'd distemper'd passion seated in the vain Aiery Region of meer foolish imagination being not grounded on any foundation of true reason or good consideration Yet I cannot imitate the Map makers who still leave a blank for their Terra Incognita but I must fill up my Paper and rather than not write more of it I will leave of scratching my head and breaking my brain any longer about it to find out how and where to begin this desperate Subject it being like a Coal all over red
hot there 's no touching it in any part without burning one finger 't is like a Hedge-Hogg all over prickles so that 't will be almost as hard a task for me to know how to hit upon a safe good way to begin this Discourse as to find a sure means to put an end to Womens governing power But since I must begin I will as all Builders do never mind to have the first foundation stone cut into any shape so I am resolv'd to lay my first entrance into this Discourse on the Courtships and power of the Welch Ladies for there I fancy the Men take no pains nor use any arts to square or polish their Addresses but only take what comes uppermost as they arise out of pure Natures Quarry And truly I am of opinion that according to the Rules of sober reason and naked truth the Welch ought to be esteem'd the more for it since as 't is a general approv'd Rule that of evils we ought still to choose the least so sure by the same rule of proportion we ought of troubles to choose the shortest which being granted we must necessarily come to own that the Welch Courtship and manner of making Love must needs surpass our great Masters of that Trade the French for the Welch are all plain honest dealing Men and good kind friends who are well acquainted with one anothers humors and therefore esteem it superfluous to make many words to a Bargain which makes them railly both the English and the French who they say dare not approach their Mistrisses but with humble looks and obedient postures speaking as Solomon says Prov. 6.13 With their feet by making so many Legs before they come to them and those with as much exactness as Poets make Verses where every syllable must be weigh'd that they may keep just Measures and true Cadence as well in their approaches as addresses Nor dare they speak to them but with large Harangues of Praises still besieging their Mistrisses with Armies of Complements in admiration of their beauty and perfections and most of these fierce great Lovers I had almost said worse differ and excel one another in their manner of Addresses means of Approaches expences in Presents degrees of Courtship and ways of Treating and the like whereas the plain dealing honest Welch-men are most of an equal kind of breeding and birth being all Gentlemen of Wales and most of them high born which is a truth all that have Travell'd thorow their Country will easily believe since really in one sense few of them can be other considering the many elevated Mountains their Country is made up with and yet I often observ'd in my Travelling through it that the Men of that Country are generally of a very plain breeding and much of a level Capacity for though Wales is highly seated yet 't is but of a short extent which occasions the whole Country to lie under the same degree of Elevation And as the Welch Gentry have for the most part an aversion to the Roman Doctrin so they have no fancy for Romance Courtship few studying the one and fewer practising the other and yet for all they are both great Vertuosos and expert Soldiers in the Art of expeditiously managing a Venus War and can sooner take by storm the Fort of their Welch Mistrisses heart than the English or French can finish their Approaches to gain so much as the outworks of their Mistrisses civil and favourable Looks But I am stray'd from my Theme and therefore I 'll conclude my Welch Travels and Interloping Discourses of Wales leaving the Welch Cavaliers to the power of their own Country Mistrisses And take notice how we are now in England shrunk into such a Brood of unmasculine Petticoat Men that are such adorers of their Mistrisses beauty as they cannot behold them but through the magnifying Prospective of their own enflam'd lustful passion and amorous folly which renders their Mistrisses beauty so large and Charming and their Power so high and Mighty that like the possessed man in the Gospel they will run thorow fire and water in their Love fit and to feed their momentary flames will venture those of everlasting Burning This wretched sort of Slaves to Womens Power who in their Courtship and Addresses to gain their Mistrisses hearts do so desperatly hazard the loss of their own Souls by offending God in their words and actions resemble exactly those People of Jerusalem and Judah which the Prophet Isaiah cap. 3. v. 8. speaks of They are fallen down because their Tongue and doings are against the Lord provoking the Eyes of his Glory And now the Prophet has told you their fault he will also tell you their punishment The Lord of Host will take from them the Judg and the Prophet the Prudent and the Ancient and will give Children to be their Princes and Babes to be their Governors and pray what is the consequence of this noble Infant Government why the Prophet tells you Vers 5. And the People shall be oppressed one by another every one by his Neigbour the Child shall behave himself proudly against the Ancient and the base against the honourable c. And as 't is a practical Art in Oratory to keep the best Arguments to bring up the Rear of the Discourse to leave the strongest Impression at the last so God is pleased to reserve for the last the greatest punishment of all which he here threatens by the Prophet when he tells men verse 12. And Women shall rule over them Really 't is a sign the Peoples stay and strength are gone and their prudence out of Power when Women are placed to Rule over them from whence without the help of Philosophy I can easily extract this Observation That the Almighty who sure best knows the abilities of his own Creatures places Women in the same Rank with Children thereby plainly denoting That a Nursery kind of Government suits best with Womens Power and this kind of doctrin is in some manner confirmed by S. Paul though in a larger Character for he ascribes to Women as their fit sphere and proper imployment the guiding of the house that is the Women in it There is an Author who in his discourse of Women very well observes that they have but three States of Life Virginity Marriage and Widdowhood for the first two they are or ought to be states of subjection to Parents and Husbands and for that of Widdowhood God himself counts that state of life to be desolate and sad the Almighty having design'd them for subjection and therefore accounts Women most miserable when most at liberty from Mans Power And now surely out of these reasons and considerations of his I may here safely because truly draw this undeniable Argument and conclusion That it cannot but be very bad for Men to be under Womens Government when God says 't is very sad for Women to be under their own And so I have done with the time when 't was
in my Retreat this farther Consideration That Wives over governing Power runs its Course quite contrary to the overflowing streams of the River Nilus for that by it produces great advantage where e'er it goes without letting any know from whence it comes but all Men and in a most especial manner the Married can tell by woful experience that Womens overflowing power in governing their Husbands must and does produce sad effects and shameful disorder where e're it goes And do but ask one of these mean-spirited Husbands from whence his Wives governing power comes and he cannot deny but it flows from the same spring his mean effeminate humor does in allowing it usurpation and I am sure our father Adam for being rul'd by his Wife did justly receive as well as truly deserve Gods wrath and punishment for it and therefore surely all such mean tame pittiful govern'd Husbands well deserve all sober Mens contempt and scorn as the just demerit of so shameful a condescension which argues either their want of wit or manhood And now the only hope of Reformation that appears to me on this particular is that Solomon tells us there 's a time for all things a time to mourn and a time to rejoyce so that there may be yet a time hereafter for Wives to obey as well as they have now to command and when they will submit as they ought to their Husbands Government then they will certainly deserve that praise and respect that is due to the honour of their Sex and receive the admiration of all Mens just courtship and esteem then may be presented on the Stage again the old-fashion Play so very long out of date as few Husbands remember it was ever Acted call'd Rule a Wife and have a Wife which indeed very few Husbands dare say they do I mean before their Wives and few would be believ'd if they really did so rare and strange a thing is this thing call'd Wife obedience as many believe 't is only to be found at John Tredeskins among his Collections of Antiquities So that I must be forc'd to yield that this rare Woman temper of Wife obedience is a thing only to be hoped not expected and therefore I will not vainly strive as Xerxes did to level Mountains nor with Nero attempt to alter the Course of the Sea but instead of endeavouring such impossibilities I will now wisely resolve neither to trouble my self nor ruling Wives to disswade them to lessen their governing power which I am sure would be a Task as hard for me to obtain as that of Xerxes or Nero was to perform Womens governing power being so long and deep rooted an usurpation possessed by so many Wives and yielded to by so many Husbands as long Custom has made it a Disease in most Husbands minds incident like the infirmities of sickness or age to their bodies which commonly has such distempers that attend it that they are worthy of all Mens pity tho' past all Mens cure Therefore I will imitate your good Physitians who esteem it unsafe to stir up those humors they cannot possibly purge away and upon this consideration I shall now muzle my Pen and found a Retreat esteeming it more wise and safe to think much rather than write more on this extensive and dangerous Subject THE FIFTH DISCOURSE Of the inconstancy of most young Ladies especially that are cry'd up beauties and the folly of any one that believes he is fully acquainted and solely possessed of a vain Ladies heart and can give good reasons for the various motions of her Love-Changes I Cannot deny but that young Womens Company may be very advantageous as well as agreeable to young Men as being very useful to whet their Wit to civilize their behaviour and to polish their Discourses but yet they ought still to remember that the Conversation of these vain young gay Ladies is to be us'd but like Sawce to Meat good to quicken the Stomack but bad to make a Meal on being to be taken like strong Cordials not too much nor too often and therefore to make their visits so moderate as not to keep longer in their Company than just to refresh and fit their minds for better employment and by these means young Men may relish young Ladies Conversation with great gusto and return to them with a no less vertuous than agreeable inclination But instead of observing these wise measures most of our young Gallants make Courting of handsom Women not only their pastime but their business so as to wast all their Time and use all their endeavors in the pursuit and attempts of gaining every new handsom face they see and if it be but new it must be handsom and taking if 't were only for being new on the modish account of sweet variety And truly most of our vain Ladies fall not at all short of them in the same act of Inconstancy but are as extravagantly foolish and as little real as they and therefore if 't were possible to perswade young Gallants and Ladies but to allow themselves time seriously to consider this matter I am apt to think first that Men would be asham'd of their folly to rely on the airy fickle and inconstant humors of most of our vain modish Ladies especially that are the cried up beauties and these our fickle Ladies no less blush I mean if their Peeter would give them leave at their indiscretion in receiving those high praises and believing those great Complements and often repeated Oaths their young Gallants make them when in real Truth these Gallants are as much inconstant to their Mistrisses as their Mistrisses can be to them and their perjured Vows of constancy on both sides weigh as little in themselves as the breath that speaks them which immediatly vanishes into meer Air without ever making the least return their Tongues and Hearts being so great strangers as there 's seldom any correspondence between them so that 't is most certain that such Men may very rationally extract out of Womens fickleness this true Conclusion that the more they confide either on Chance Fortune or handsom Womens Constancy which are all three now a days much alike the more folly as well as falsehood they entertain in their relyance and depending on them Sir John Sucklin was a person of great Wit and Parts and not only highly esteem'd of by the applauded witty Men but by the handsom Ladies of his age and was one who had made many Philosophical Essays on the wavering nature and various windings of many of the Ladies humors and inclinations as far as an extraordinary Wit a plentiful Fortune a liberal Mind an open Purse and a Venus heart could carry him and after having employ'd all these with all the care and industry imaginable he found most young Womens hearts so volatile and inconstant and to come so far short of real Truth as nothing can be farther which occasion'd this noble Knight-Errant to leave behind him in Print this
friendly Caution that it might appear as publick as young Womens inconstancy or young Mens folly who pretend to a perfect knowledge and sole possession of a young beauties heart you that propound to your selves propriety in Love know Womens hearts like straws do move and that which you vainly think is Sympathy with you is really but Love to Jet in general Indeed the most experienc'd Venus Philosophers and enlightned Inspectors into the humors of most Womens hearts and affections are apt to make as gross oversights in their guesses and fancies of their making good Wives or true Lovers as the ablest Seamen do often commit mistakes in their sight at Sea sometimes taking Land for Clouds other times Clouds for Land Really the very best and most able Masters of Art and most Critical Enquirers with their greatest observations and pretences of knowledge as to the Motions of Ladies hearts can only make such imperfect guesses and speculations as Astronomers do of the Operation of the Stars which is but by the great they can give an account of the general order of Providence in their Stations and Motions but can give no certain Rule or true Measure to discern their Influences upon particular actions or bodies no more than they can give a reason other than Gods Will why constant success attends this Mans undertakings and a continued ill fortune waits on another Mans endeavors or why a wicked cursed Tyrant should live out his Natural Life prosperously among his abused Vassals and our highly excellent and truly pious Martyr King Charles the first of ever Blessed Memory should be barbarously Murder'd by his own free Subjects which is a most clear and plain Lesson of instruction not to Judg the true right of Causes by the false light of successes and therefore sober religious Men freely own their ignorance as to the certain Causes of the divers effects of Gods providence as to the event of things in this world there being such an infinity of Causes that depend on one another that good and wise Christians esteem it their best and safest way to live in a state of Neutrality as to a pretending knowledge of the effects of Gods providence in the Issues either of his Mercies or Judgments And truly if our young Gallants were as wise as they ought to be they would also live in a State of Neutrality as to their Judgment of the motions of young Ladies fancies and be satisfied with these general notions that their minds and inclinations are generally bent towards men who are young handsom rich witty high born well bred and the like but how to discern special Causes for particular Occurrences and to be able to tell the true reasons and give the just measures for Womens so often differing and varying in their Love fancies is I believe beyond the power of Man to Judge some Women esteeming the black before the fair others the fair before the black in which few agree or this handsom Man before t'other and sometimes an ugly Man before them both Womens likings to Men being like their mode of governing who tho the power be still the same and certain yet the manner of it is always changeable and inconstant I say in all these changes or rovings of fancy the most knowing and experienc'd Lovers can make at very best but imperfect Guesses almost as very uncertain as Womens Constancy or young Mens Love which indeed is much of the nature of common Hay and Stubble which a little spark lights and a small time consumes young Men being more inconstant in their addresses than very beauty in its duration most of our young Gallants Love being not able to keep up to the same degree of Elevation as the short space wherein their Mistrisses beauty does In a word I think the best Wit and most knowing Lover cannot say better of the nature of Womens Love than what S. Austin said of the nature of the Times I fancy I know it when no body bids me describe it but find I am ignorant of it when any does Truly few of our 〈◊〉 Lâ—â—â—es guide themselves in their Love choices by the clear Light and true Rule of Reason which occasions their being so often misled by the vain Love flashes of their present Airy fancy And indeed when a young Mans alluring beauty or what else you please to call it attracts a young Womans sight and thereby moves her fickle fancy and inconstant likings and so stamps a fierce but hasty impression of Love on her tender slippery heart which commonly makes the newest object the richest prize for indeed most of our modish Ladies Gallants are to them like the Fashions where usually the last Commer is best lik'd and most us'd And the Jest of it is that many of these changeable Ladies being so smitten are apt to believe that this their last Love is the only true one and that all their former Loves were but a kind of Mushrom Love which sprung up in a Night as Mushroms do without any Root but that this their present Love is built on good reason and true consideration and therefore shall be like the Laws of the Medes and Persians unalterable being so deeply engraven in their marble hearts as 't is never to be altered or worn out but by death forgetting all the Changes they formerly made and by the same Rule of Inconstancy they may hereafter make according to the taking objects which new conversation may present and that 't is possible if not probable that their present passion of Love that is so newly kindled and fully lighted may in some farther time be swallow'd up and extinguished by a more inviting beauty that may present more charming and agreeable and 't is most certain that the Love which possesses and inflames a young Ladies heart last Eclipses all former fancies as the Suns appearance darkens all other Lights the Sun being to be seen by no other light but his own In short most Womens hearts and Love vows of Constancy are to be read but like strange Prophecies which are to be understood not by their Words but by their Events Indeed most of our airy Ladies are so volatile and fickle in their Amours as not only their Eyes hearts and inclinations but their whole nature is so addicted to change and variety as one might as easily fix Mercury or make brickle Glass malleable as to fix a young Womans humor and love-fancy so as not to break out into change and inconstancy they being more fickle and changable than the very Wind it self for there are Trade Winds that blow still certainly one way all the Year without ever altering from the same Point and Place but a vain Ladies Constancy is not certainly to be found at any time or in any place their Love-humors being like the Camelions Colours whose property is to have no certain one So that 't is no wonder to find a young Woman that is inconstant but a greater one to find one
whose mind is truly sanctified will extract uses of vertue out of such extravagant Womens vanities like the Bee that sucks Hony out of all sorts of venomous Herbs and like Fire that turns all things within its compass to its self and such a Ladies holy course of Life will be steady and certain in its progress like the Sun in his daily motion nothing of Storms or changable weather can ever hasten or retard its regular course for a Lady that 's in the holy state of true Mortification her constant Piety will so purifie and draw off her inclinations from all vain pastimes and modish vanities and from those foul dregs of impurity that are the usual attendants of a vain idle London Life that by this Transfiguration of Mind and pious habit of Life her Conversation will be as the Apostle says fixed up in Heaven and we all know that the upper Region of the Air it self will admit of no Storms or Thunder for they are all formed below it And farther that Lady who is so blessed as to have her heart touch'd with this Magnetic vertue of true godliness her thoughts will be elevated to such a heavenly pitch of spiritual vertue and religion as she will despise all the young Gallants fine words deep sighs and languishing looks with all their high Praises and showers of Complements which will work no more on her sanctified Mind than showers of Hail on the tops of well covered Houses which fall off as soon as it falls on without ever touching any of the inward part And whereas our vain Ladies receive the extravagant encomiums and flatteries I might have almost said Adorations of their vain Gallants as the Lawful Issue of their own applauded Merit a truly pious Lady will only hearken to all the Airy Praises young Men ascribe to her beauty to be but the Bastard brood of their own abundant sin and folly and she will make such pious reflections on such young Mens overmuch praises grounded on a sense of her own unworthiness of them as she will not only despise their extravagant speeches but themselves for speaking of them which doubtless cannot but be very acceptable to God the searcher of all hearts who still giveth grace to the humble Therefore Ladies if you really desire true piety and humility I must advise you again and again never to hearken with delight or hear with belief or indeed suffer with patience but shun with diligence young Mens airy praises and Complements nor yet countenance their flatteries for multitude of Praises cannot but perplex young Ladies Minds as many Lights still confound the Sight and therefore when you hear young Men give their Tongues such loose liberties and over large ranges in magnifying your beauty remember such high Complemental expressions are to be trusted no more than the Christian Flag of a Turkish Pyrat which he only hangs out that you might esteem him your friend that thereby he may make you become his Slave Therefore Ladies keep still about you this preservative of your vertue that you look upon on all the vain Gallants that Court you with high Complements and great praises to be but so many Judas's that come to betray you with a kiss and do not believe their Oaths either on the account of what they swear as to your great beauty or their own true Love for really flattery and vain praises are now grown such common Arts among fond Lovers as well as great States-men and Complemental Courtiers as we often meet the truth of their meaning in the contradiction of their words 7. My last concluding advise to the vain modish Ladies is when one of you is curiously beholding and admiring your fine Face in your Glass and find that the great beauty of it raises proud thoughts in your heart which is almost as common among handsom Ladies as 't is for them to look in their Glass which nothing can be more common humble your pride with these mortifying reflections that this very fine Face of yours that you like so much love so well and are so taken with and fond of must unavoidably in a little time become loathsom rottenness stink and corruption turn odious either to be seen or smelt which is as very certain as mortality it self and death you know is not only sure to meet you but your are exposed by a thousand accidents to meet it whilst you are travelling in this Earthly Pilgrimage for the spritely gaiety of your blossom youth can only let you know how long you may possibly live but can give no advance security how long you certainly will therefore young Ladies as well as old Men ought still to march under the safe Conduct of a vertuous Life and not to trust to the temptation of a long Life but to rely only on the blessed security of a good one I shall conclude this Discourse and Book with the good saying of an excellent religious person That the vainest beauty on Earth cannot justly deny this great Truth that beauty is not absolutely necessary to the good of this Life but that Piety is essentially necessary both to the good of this Life and the next too since one may live well without beauty but one can neither live or die well without Piety FINIS