your Person yet we Widows that have some Fortune are to consider something besides Passion Prigg As I have told you before my Estate is not inconsiderable besides the great Favour I have with the Gameing and Jocky Lords and besides if the King frequents New-Market I doubt not but in a short time to Rise L. Cheat. But you are a Gamester Prigg Ay Madam but I never Play I do but Rook. L. Cheat. Rook What 's that Cheat Prigg No Madam I go to Twelve and the better of the Lay besides I get five hundred pound a year at Horse-Races and Cock-Matches by being in fee with the Grooms and Cock-keepers and Madam I play as well at Tennis Ombre Back-gammon Trick track and Crimp as any Man which is no small addition to my Estate I gave you these things in my particular if your Ladyship please to remember L. Cheat. But you cannot make a Joynture of these things and therefore I must consider a little longer Prigg With all my heart Madam but in the mean time let you and I play a Set at Trick track and when the rest come in well make a Match at Ombre Enter Steward Stew. Madam There are some Tenants wait without to speak with you L. Cheat. You 'll pardon me I must go to ' em Ex. L. Cheatly Prigg Come on Mr. Steward what say you to a Game at Back-gammon Stew. If you 'll retire to my Chamber have at you Prigg With all my heart Exâ—…nt Enter Enter Theodosia Isabella Bellamour Carlos Stanmore Carlos Who 's there the Lady Pleasant's Daughter Theodosia Bell. It is She 's young and handsom has a great deal of Wit and a very good Fortune which makes her set up for Marriage and is impregnable to any thing else Carl. She 's extream pretty I lov'd her violently before I went into Fâ—…ance but now she 's a Thousand times more Beautiful Stanm. Ladies your humble Servant Bell. A Gentleman a friend of ours lately come out of France He salutes ' em Carl. And glad I am so for all that Nation could not shew me so much Beauty Theod. I see Sir you have not been in France for nothing you have imported French goods I mean Compliments they are a Nation full of Complimenters Carl. They are so Madam and the Taylor does it full as well as the Gentleman 't is a Road of speaking which all of 'em have I was not dull enough to get it of 'em nor would I bring so common a thing as a Compliment to you Madam Theod. You can bring it to no Body that dislikes it more Carl. Or needs it less Theod. Thus have I heard of a very Rhetorical Oration against Eloquence Enter Gartrude Gart. O'Lord Mr. Stanmore here runs out Bell. Run Stanmore your business is more than half done 't is a certain sign when a Woman seeks Corners that she means some good by it Stanm. I 'l try that Ex. Stanmore Bell. I see my friend 's caught again for all his Travel I have a fellow-feeling of his Case let 's retire and give him opportunity Isab. With all my heart opportunity is safe in the beginning of an Amour though it may be dangerous afterwards They retire Theod. I hear never a French word from you and that 's strange for all our Sparks are so refined they scarce speak a sentence without one and though they seldome arrive at good French yet they get enough to spoil their English Carl. If a man means nothing he cannot chuse a better Language for it makes a pretty noise without any manner of thought Theod. You have scarce brought one substantial Vanitie over with you what have you learnt there Carl. To love my own Countrey and to think that none can show us so fine Women in France they buy their Beauty and sell their Love Theod. That Fashion is coming up apace here Carl. True Beauty Madam can no more be bought than true Love in me behold the one while I admire the other in your self Theod How many French Ladies have you said as much to Carl. I went thither to be cured of Love not to make it Theod. What Love Carl. My love of you which began so early in my Heart selâ—…-selâ—…-love was scarce before it When your disdain could not remove it I tried absence but in vain too Theod. T is impossible you could bring a Heart unhurt from France Carl. My Love to you preserved me from all Foreign Invasion Theod. If you make Love you 'l grow dull it spoils a man of Wit as much as Business Carl. If Love be predominant in Conversation I confess it but a little relish of it does well Theod. The imitation of it may be borne but the thing its self is a dead weight upon the mind and a man can no more please under that disadvantage than a Horse can run a Race with a pair of Panniâ—…rs on his Back Carl. And yet that Horse may do it if the match be well made Theod. I must have my Servant all Wit all Gaiety and the Ladies of the Town run mad for him I would not only triumph over him but over my whole Sex in him Carl. This is hard Doctrine for a man of my sincerity and truth in Love Theod. Make Isabella slight Bellamour little Gartrude sacrifice Selfish Be the third word in every Ladies mouth from fifteen to five and thirty and you shall find what I 'l say to you Carl. To attempt this were great vanity and no less dishonâ—…sty to my friend Bellamour Theod. If you love you 'l think any thing lawful This must be done I dare not trust my own judgment I will have you in vogue e're I favour you in the least Carl. Well since these Ladies are your outworkâ—… I will on and by the force of imagination make every one Theodosia but if I fail think on my constant love which will not suffer me to use deceit Theod. Suppose I should answer you in your whining strein and say my love were true as yours my flame as great and all your wishes mine Carl. Then were Carlos the happiest man on Earth Theod. No then the Game were up betwixt us and there were no more to do but to pay the stakes and then to something else Carl. We might play Set after Set for ever Theod. No one of us would be broke go get you about your task I say Ex. Carl. and Theod. Enter Selfish and Young Maggot Yo. Mag. Did you see how the Ladies flockt about me at Court when I made a relation of the Rehearsal and afterwards when I read my Song to ' em Self I think I am as well with the Ladies there as any Man and they like my Songs too they say they 'r so easie so gentile and well bred and so pat to the Womens understandings the Men say th' are silly but they are envious Yo. Mag. I 'l secure you the Play takes I have done the Poet's business with the Ladies who you
L. Cheat. Will you not stay and take the Assignments Lump I will not break my Method for the World I have these twenty years walk't through Turn-stile Alley to Holborn Fields at Four all the good WOmen observe me and set their Bread into the Oven by me and by no other Clock when I go by I hear 'em call Carry the Bread to the Oven the old Gentleman is going by I do love to be taken notice of for my Method Farewel Ex. Lump L. Cheat. Let 's into the Garden Exeunt omnes Enter Bell. and Isab. Bell. By Heaven I love thee more than light or liberty joy of my heart Isab. Such hearts as yours are seldom near their mouthes Bell. A kiss of this fair hand will bring mine thither 't is there but if it were your lips where would it be Isab. Raptures in Love have no more meaning in 'em than Rants in Poetry meer Fustian 't is the stum of Love that makes it fret and â—…ume and fly and never good Bell. Can a young Lady in so warm an Age be insensible of Love Isab. A vertuous Woman is ever insensible of such a Love as is unfit for her but you Sparks like Wolves after many battels by often preying upon Carkasses come at last to venture upon the living modest or not 't is all one to you you are so well â—…esht Bell. Not so Madam I know my duty and your worth and would time stand still I could be content to gaze upon that face and not tempt you but our Love is frail and we must take our pleasures while we may Isab. I must consider while I may and on the shore think on the ruines of a ship wrackt Fame Bell. We shall never reach Love's Indies if we fear tempests already Isab. Think not to conquer me by dint of Simile I 'll never venture the pain and peril of such a bold Voyage Bell. As tender Barks make it daily and return home richly fraught keep Coaches and live splendidly the rest of their lives Isab. Infamously rather Bell. I know not that but they have their days of Visiting play at Ombre make Treats as high and as often as the Persons of Quality wear as good cloaths and want no fashionable Folly that Woman's heart can wish for and of all such my Isabella shall ride Admiral Isab. Can you pretend to love and tempt me from my Honour Coaches and Cloaths so Rogues will 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 live like Gentlemen Bell. ' â—…is no dishonour custom has made it otherwise Isab. When a Man of Honour can turn Coward you may prevail on me the case is equal Bell. On the contrary Kindness in Women is like Courage in Men. Isaâ—… Did not the geneâ—…l licence of the time excuse you I ne'r would see you â—…re Bell. What will nothing down but to have and to hold I 'll marry no body else and when my inclination dies leave you its wealthy Widow you may marry after it Isaâ—… 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 where I bring my person Bell. This coldness 〈◊〉 me more consent to my desires and none of all the Ladies shall outshine no Equipage exceed yours Isab. And I the while shall be but a part of your Equipage to be kept what is it but to wear your Livery and take Board-wages Bell. I love you well enough to marry you but dare not put my self into your hands knowing what a Jade I am at a long Journey Isab. If you ever loved 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 hate and I can be content where I have had the best to keep the 〈◊〉 and if you love me less shall lay the fault on Nature not on you Bell. It 〈◊〉 more against 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 fall in his 〈◊〉 than his Expence and they that do either most 〈◊〉 remove for it there is no enduring it in the same place Think on my Love my Fortune shall be yours Isab. I scorn a Fortune with the ruine of my Honour Bell. It is but heading with another sort of People leaving the melancholy hypocrites for the gay chearful sinners the envious for the envyed Isab. These tales may catch unheedful silly Creatures whom Nature half debauches to your hands but for my self I swear La. Busy appears to ' em La. Bus. Swear not ungracious Child I have heard all your Discourse the Gentleman is a fine Gentleman and his proposals are as reasonable as any Lady â—…an wish for every man cannot bring himself tâ—… marry and yet may love better and longer than those that do Bell. Right Madam this is an unexpected assistance La. Bus. There 's Mr. Maggot kept Mrs. Wagtail after the whole Town had done with her and loves her very well still nay some have not grutch'd to spend ten thousand pounds upon a Mistress though they have starv'd their Wives and Children Isab. Have you fee'd this Lady to plead for you or is it the baseness of her own Nature La. Bus. Is my Charity thus rewarded my Honour question'd I that am companion to the Ladies of the best quality the jealousest Lord thinks his Lady safe in my company my Honour is dearer to me than all the World and but for endeavouring to have you well settled in the World as I have my Daughters do I deserve this Isab. She is as silly as she 's naught when you see me next bring nobler thoughts and better purposes And so farewel Ex. Isabella Bell. What a Devil shall I do She 's vertuous and fit enough for a Wife Ounds how that word makes me start but all this may be a copy of her countenance there may be Huffs in vertue as well as courage La. Bus. I hope Sir you 'll not conceive amiss for what she says Bell. No Madam Pox on this Bawd I love the treason but I hate the traytor Ex. La. Bus. and Bellamore Enter Stanmore Stan. Your humble Servant Madam has your Ladyship had the goodness to mind my Affair L. Busy I have Sir I see her coming retire and let me alone Come pretty Mrs. 〈◊〉 Enter Mrs. Gartrude Gart. Your Servant Madam L. Busy Thou art a pretty Creature ah 't would do a man good to lye by such flesh and blood as thou art all the matter is to chuse a good Bedfellow and for that trust me there is the prettiest man and the finest Gentleman not far off Gart. Ay so there is really Mr. Selfish is the finest person so civil and well bred and is very ingenious too I vow 't would do one good to have such a Bedfellow L. Busy You are out 't is Mr. Stanmore is the Man and will make a good Settlement go to which the other cannot Gart. He is a fine Gentleman indeed but really I don't care for a Wit I do not know what to say before 'em but I can talk with Mr. Selfish all the day long oh he does tell such pretty Stories of himself he is a very fair spoken man and I 'll swear he is the purest company for a Lady
What means your Impudence Stew. Impudence to command my Wife Know your Duty Prig. Your Wife Why you are her Man are you not Stew. What Fellow 's this I must have new Orders I must have no such Customers about my House L. Cheat. Call a Constable the poor Fellow 's distracted Stew. No but I may make the Lady so if she persists in her Impudence Brig Thou art very sawcy to thy Lady and Mistress Stew. Peace Fool Sawcy to my Wife Prig. Fool hah Fool What a Pox would you be at L. Cheat. Impudent Villain thy Wife Stew. Most audacious Woman Darest thou deny it Was I not married to you yesterday in your own Chamber by a Parson of your own chusing L. Cheat. How dar'st thou affirm so impudent a Lye Where didst thou dream this Prig. I have my Que I 'll have my hand in the Plot. Ex. Prig. Stew. Why thou most infamous of Women Canst thou deny this L. Cheat. Yes thou most impudent of Rascals I will deny it to all the World and I have taken care that thou shalt never prove it Stew. Hell and Devils Is there one amongst you like this Woman L. Cheat. Well if you will be quiet and stir no farther in this Business a thousand pound is yours if not you never shall have me nor any thing of mine Marry such a Fellow Stew. No base Woman I 'll undo thee L. Cheat. 'T is out of your power Fool you have sworn to all my Bonds and Deeds already Stew. Most Vile of Cheats I 'll find your Parson if he be in England Enter Prigg in the Habit of a Parson Oh happy Fortune here he is L. Cheat. What means this Coxcomb Prigg Stew. Now Madam did not you marry me to this Lady yesterday Speak upon the word of a Priest Prig. Yes I did Stew. Now what says your Impudence I thought I should catch you Were you so cunning to deny it Where do you live Sir Prig. Madam Pray help me off with my Habit. L. Cheat. This is well enough Stew. Hah What a Devil 's this Were you the Parson Prig. Yes good Sir L. Cheat. Yes This was my Chaplain you sawcy Fool Could you think I would marry such a filthy Fellow as you are Stew. I will give you to understand Madam that 't is a good Marriage and I 'll bring you into the Court to swear it Sir Prig. If you do Sir I 'll hold six to four I forswear it Sir Stew. Why sure you dare not Prig. By Heaven I dare and will not forswear my self for such a Wiâ—…ow Gentlemen forswear themselves to get Whores and make nothing on 't Be gone out of my house she is mine Fellow be gone I say Stew. Curse on my shallow head that I should be so credulous to believe her to be true to me when I was an hourly Witness of her falshood to others I will have you my Wife or be reveng'd to that degree you shall repent this Treachery your whole life I am going to visit all those you have had Business with this moneth and I shall tell 'em such a Tale. Ex. Steward Prig. I 'll cut his Throat say no more L. Cheat. Pray hasteâ—… after this malicious clamourous Rascal and stop him some way or other he 'll invent a thousand lyes of me get him arrested upon an Action of ten thousand pound at my Suit Prig. Let me alone I 'll do as becomes a Gentleman Ex. Prig. L. Cheat. This Trouble ioyn'd with that Fool my Daughter will undo me but I will find out Maggot and he shall help to salve up all Enter Maggot Oh Mr. Maggot I havâ—… Business to communicate to you of the greatest concernment to me thaâ—… ever hapned Mag. Gad Madam â—…o If any Man in England understands Business or loves it better than I do I 'll be burnt L. Cheat. Every Man loves what he is good at give me a Man of Business for my Friend the fine Gentlemen of the Town are like Fidlers only good at idle hours Mag. There are no great Persons at this end of the Town have any Business but I do it for 〈◊〉 I am the busiest Man in England and I hope Madam you 'll consider of my Love to Business and to your Ladyship L. Cheat. Why that is part of the Business I am to confer with you about Enter Lady Busy and Young Maggot L. Busy Madam I beg you will retire I have an Affair with Young Mr. Maggot that concerns you and Mrs. Gartrude L. Busy Mr. Maggot I can never enough admire your Uncle Maggot's aversion to Wit and Breeding nor can I chuse but pity you who are like to be so great a sufferer for your Love to both Yo. Mag. I glory in my suffering for so good a Cause L. Busy Well many a Man would be proud of such a Nephew but is it true that you are like to be dis-inherited Yo Mag. It is as true as I my self will ever be to Wit and Beauty unless I will recant my Works and for the future renounce Tropes Figures Similes and all ornaments of Speech L. Busy These are hard Conditions Yo. Mag. A Man of my vigorous Imagination had as good have been born dumb I will sing and starve to death like a Grashopper e're I submit L. Busy Go to Suppose some Friend of yours more careful of you than you are of your â—…elf should find a way to compose this matter without prejudice to your Poetry Yo. Mag. 〈◊〉 Friend should be another Apollo if a Man and a tenth Mâ—…e to me if a Woman L. Busy Good There is a Woman a pretty one young and rich too in the case Very well but how shâ—…ll I come by this Woman say you Go to let me alone a fine Woman with a good Fortune were no ill refuge from the anger of your Uncle hah Yo. Mag. But if I should marry what will the World say of my Wit I had rather lose my Honour and starve than lose the name of a Wit L. Busy Your Reputation is establisht already go to consider Yo. Mag. But Madam my Heart is engaged and the poor Soul loves me again to madness I did but kiss my hand to a Lady in a window t'other day and the poor Thing fell into a Fit she will never out-live such a hainous Tergiversation L. Busy Come come you know not the World this is some soft-hearted Fool that will be as fond of another in three days Go to I know the Sex better than you but such a Reputation such a Face and such a Fortune Yo. Mag. Nâ—…y if she have a better Face and Reputation than my Gartrude I will forswear Poetry and write Short-hand at Conventieles all the rest of my Life L. Busy Is she the Woman My Lady Cheatly looks very high for her Daughter Stanmore and several Fortunes are about her do you conceive me Yo. Mag. That 's all one As for my part I have chosen one And I 'll have my Love