and not to loath his sharpest dealings For while many things might seeme to ouer-throw vs they set vs vp vppon the height of honour 19 IF any take a spightfull griefe at me and would force me with ouer-vehement iniuries to breake peace and to vtter forth the violent passion of reuenge I will shew forth no other but the fruits of a gentle nature and I will be so farre from bringing forth that which desperate reuenge can imagine that their mallice shall sooner cease then my vnchanged patience 20 IT is no vulgar thing among the vulgar people to shoote their prayses and commendations at randome sometimes they will sweetly speake and plentifully prayse men of great worthinesse Anon they will not sticke to giue excessiue commendations to the vilest varlets I will not care therefore what such wether-cockes tell of me For I count it a great happinesse onely to be praysed of them that are most prayse-worthy 21 MAny thinke to receaue the guifts of Heauen and yet shall receaue at Gods hands a resolute refusall which will bee more wofull and vnwelcome to them then a bitter deniall to an expected suiter And no maruaile for it is rather credit then grace that leads most men to matter of Heauen And when the spur of honour ceases they willingly rest in their carnall delights and follow the gentle currant of them But now the most holy God hath such vile men in eternall hatefulnesse and for such carriage there shall bee neither grace nor fauourablenesse So then I will labour that in me euery thing may bee Godly and full of syncerity and seriously I vow that neither credit nor fauour shall make mee to slubber ouer duty 22 NO close Arbour the Branches of which are so louingly enterlaced one within the other can resist the strong violence of Gods eye-sight nor closest roomes which vnchast Dames count Chambers of delight are destitute of Gods honorable presence Why then braue Knights and faire Ladies and all my louely brethren Sisters let vs rather dye then spot our selues with secret filthines Let vs mark a diligent and nimble dogge can finde a scent which we thinke impossible and when God can make such a Creature to finde out such a thing shall not hee bee able to finde out our wickednes though wee bee in our Dennes Hence then I wil account it extreame folly any longer to imprison iniquity 23 AN ambitious man striues to bring others vertuous patience vnder him and thinkes his maister-hood nothing without doing iniury to men But I dare not bee a man of such excellency least God should aduance me to Hamans dignity 24 I Haue thought it to bee no great matter to draw many euill men to many inconueniences especially if a man would follow them with a watch full seruice for euery present occasion will catch their senses and their senses are maisters of their silly minds so that onely reuerence them and delight them and with that bridle and saddle you shal well ride them But as for me I am determined neuer to bee carried with such an eager impatient delight of any thing as the nimble wits of the world shall with their lewd inticements draw me to sin 25 IT is no vnusuall thing to make hard-wrested constructions of words oft proceeding from the kindest natures which apprehended as true estranges loue and eclipses affection from shining any longer But I haue often thought and will doe still that the construction of mens speeches might bee best made by the Grammer-rules of affection 26 I Find that to a heart fully resolute to preach the trueth hatefull persons and ignorant asses to whom Counsell is tedious and reprehension loathsome both in word and deede worke much annoyance an euident token of an ignorant and shallow mind Shallow Brookes murmur most deepe silent slide away and I haue heard Pies chattering when better Birds haue held their peace Mine eare then shall such vp kind Counsells and wholsome reprehensions which true louing teachers scatter before me And I will bee so far from reproching them that my kindest courtesie shall be imployed for them 27 MAny men thinke on nothing but their sports seeke nothing but their sports To their delights their attendance is directed and to their pleasures the best fruits they can gather are brought And surely once I thought these men in the highest blisse-fulnesse But experience grounded on feeling hath taught me a better lesson and hath learned mee that the wickeds singings must be closed vp with hearty gronings I will blesse the Lord that hath vouchsafed to mee a better happines and that hath loued me so as to bring me among the sweet company of his beloued Saints I say sweet indeed which I will not forsake for the worlds faire delights for God is their saying and God is their singing and God is the Load-starre of their life the blessing of their eyes the sweetnesse of their heart Lord let mee liue and dye in this sweet and heauenly society 29 SOme I haue beheld very famous and notable for goodnesse but since finding godlines very tedious being deadly tired with the length of the vncōfortable labour of it they haue discarded it giuing themselues to outragious licentiousnes in which they so flesh themselues as I thinke they meane not to stop their race till they come to a head-long ouerthrow Thus like some Mornings they haue made guilden shewes of good meanings but after clouds haue risen powring out water and blacking ouer all the face of Heauen But I am resolued to put forth my hand to euery most painefull Office rather then to bee disseuered from the practisse of godlinesse 29 MEn may maruaile why so fraile and weake a creature as man should yet so harden and stiffen himselfe in sinne against God as he will not bee reclaymed But is it not because his power is forgotten his Soueraigne Lordship ouer al the creatures not carefully considered For if these were currantly conceiued the valiantest of men would finde inward dismayednesse and bee deepely cast downe for feare of hellish darkenesse The Marriners see when the Heauens fauour the Sea fauours also and they may be safe then and lye calmely but if the Heauen frowne and the windes begin to speake loud and as in a tumultuous Kingdome to think themselues fittest instruments of commandment then the sea will storme also and the stoutest of them all waxe agast and astonished I will there fore keepe in a cleere Hauen and seeke the fauour of the highest and then no inferiour Creature will shew it selfe way-ward to mee 30 WEe count it a miserable condition to bee at Sea in such a boystrous storme as the shippe wherein wee are hath neither power to staye nor way to escape but being carried with the Tirrany of the winde and the treason of the sea with vnresistable violence fals to destruction But O how miserable is it then to bee tossed and tottered with the outragious furie of sinne and Sathan
and firmest affections oh then that some of my friends would be lesse suspitious and not so credulous that my choycest friends might not proue so vnkinde and boystrous It is a very sensible displeasure to be refused of a deere friend 54 MEn are more discontented to see them-selues frustrated of things promised then of those which are but hoped for in the one there is but mishap they complaine onely of fortune in the other contempt and they challenge him that hath broken his promise I will promise nought then but what I meane to performe for I know the nature of man is more sensible of contempt then of losse 55 THe iust saith GOD shall liue by faith I will thinke then euery daie I rise I haue no life if I doe not walke all that daie by faith doing nothing but that may seeme good in the eyes of GOD and what I am fully perswaded pleases him 56 IT was well said Kings Crownes doe not helpe them from the cruell head-ach nor shooes of gold doth heale the gout Riches auaile not in the day of wrath but righteousnesse deliuers from death this is a receiued rule How is it then young men wax so proud of wealth and present age so lofty An aged Gentleman of an approued goodnesse could say That this boyish brauery would bring one daie a perplexed minde How shall wise men like then such Gentlemen as be earnest in euery present humour and make themselues braue in their owne liking Oh bee they not like a bubble blowne vp with their owne small-proud breath and quickly shall be broken with a greater Had I then millions of gold I would thinke that these outward pleasures would smally pleasure my soule Small greatnes heere if guilty conscience neere I thinke it greater greatnesse to get the surest kingdome 57 EXperience hath taught me Miseries doe oft begin when as they seeme to end Haue I not known some discarded after many notable deserts which was the more notable to them because they fell from excesse of fauour from a heape of sweetes expected to a heape of sorrow rejected Haue I not knowne sorrow creepe suddenly amidst ioy whiles friends treate of marrying newes comes of death I thinke then there is not any man but may haue more harme then hee hath had good If hony come then and the sweetest pleasures I vowe to looke for change and to expect that Sorrow like a Beare is ready to giue mee a shrewd imbracement 58 IT is vsuall amongst men to accuse Nature or else mens company or to cast their complaints on the euill times or some way or other to deminish sin and to forme for themselues substantial excuses They are cunning to find pleasing names for things which are bitter and nought But alasse this is nothing Hee that will breake with his friend neuer failes to finde occasions so may wee a thousand if wee will breake with GOD. I protest I will neuer doe so No remembrance of others noughtinesse shall delight mee to guild ouer my guiltinesse if it should what did I else but make my scratchings incurable wounds 59 I Haue often obserued that many mornings make guilden shewes of good meanings and yet afterwards clowdes haue risen powring out water and blacking ouer all the face of heauen Surely not vnlike haue I seene among the sonnes and daughters of men Lord what glittering shewes haue I beheld whence I haue discied the foulest and blackest heart What calmenes of sea whence sodainly hath rose outragious waues what louing company milde mouth hony words when vnder all hath closely beene dissembled a cruel minde Lord shield me from such vgly beasts whom thou wilt one day fling into the pit of hellish darknesse I know there is no danger carries with it more horror then this so aduerse to thy truth Keepe me therefore from this desperate daubing 60 INiuries done to faith and reputation are not easily repaired nor recompenced yet men through desperate ambition do oft commit this outragious wrong what euill surmises shrewd suspitious mad meditations be in some which being carried with the current of this disposition doe receiue all thinges with the hardest interpretation condemne all men of euill because their minde hath no eye to espie goodnesse But what is there not but in hard wrested constructions may bee counted a blot so men of incomparable worth may be debased I vow to driue away such beastly furies and to scowre my head of such surmises least they bee an vnhappy occasion of staining my brothers reputation 61 THe tongue wel tuned makes most pleasant musicke and is to man a principall ornament but men haue made it a very false Embassador deliuering affections whereof their heart is vtterly void What dolorous discourses shall you heare when heart within hath mighty delight what mighty delights when heart within makes dolorous discourse What kindely termes tongue turneth out when malicious matter is wrapt in secrecie What mallice in mouth when kinde conceits with in What coy and thundring speeches oft deny a thing when the heart with dumbe eloquence desires it And are not these now excellent people The false Embassador must bee cut off for his presumption so let the tongue of such bee cut out that talke on such a fashion I le tune my tongue aright if sighes hearty sorrow sâ—unds if cheerefull be my heart my tongue shall shew it 62 CHrist was more pure then the nicest eye can finde a spot in his iudgement sound his affections spotlesse his inward worthinesse shined through the foulest mists No maruell if hee bee set for our example O rare example not to be hoped for of any other Away from me all yee that delight in horrible foulenes I delight not in your vnpleasant company your life is rusty and ilfauored I wil cast mine eye to my beloued Sauiour hee was full of beauty sweetnes and noble Conuersation 63 THe haughty heart of man thinkes it foule scorne willingly to submit to bee ruled by Gods teachers they nourish themselues in ouermuch vaine hope But did they know and acknowledge their value what heart so hard and eare so barbarous but would bee imployed to heare and yeeld Would men would giue resolute refusalls or happy resolutions to heare his voyce I le tread the path let them now follow Speake Lord for thy seruant heareth what thou biddest be done I resolue to vndertake 64 COnceit is much some thinke so highly of their owne as others cannot reach vnto them but if they bee crost with better Conceits then burst they out into rage and bitternesse such troublesome effects selfe-conceit breeds Then will they lye and sweare to get aduantage But by their leaue who so tells a lye and ads an oath I count his conceits deceits and I esteeme him weake in witte and vile in conscience O Lord then let me not brag much of any wit I haue least while I would shew my selfe witty I demonstrate a heart too farre possessed with folly 65 ALl
men couet to bee Best fayne would we surpasse one another but the wronge course is taken Hard fayre great iournies dangerous attempts mischiuous Coūcells vnmercifull force mortall wounds are vnder-gone and vnder-taken and all to bee Best that is forsooth to bee richest But alasse it is not so hee that sinnes least is the best man and he that sinnes most is the worst Oh then I will flye from sinne and I will account my self excellentest when from sinne I can stand the farthest 66 VVHen learned men come amonge rude vnskilfull swaines they many times haue not ordinary courtesie from them yea often they haue giuen vnto them an vnkind and shrewd welcome I maruaile not at it for betweene them and vertue there was neuer knit a fast frendshippe by any education Their witte is so base they cannot conceiue the beauty and sweetnes of a learned life But though such loue to drinke on the draffe let my life bee spent among the learned breasts For this I know Hee that leaueth the learned to liue with the ignorant may happen on some wealth but hee shall neuer bee wise 67 Who so hath gotten vertue possesses a Lady of great beauty and such a beauty as shewes forth the beames of wisedome where euer it comes Indeed deepe sorrowes strange wrongs often mightily darken her excellency for a time But as the excellent and swift running Sunne quickly breakes out and kindely cheeres the short and sweet nibled grasse so Lady vertue quickly adorns her owner and well arayes him with most pleasant grace Lord giue mee vertue then rather then the exquisitest dainties and daintiest varieties that high conceits can fancy 68 I Hold it a base thing to be straitened by vnworthy seruitude a man can not then goe to behold delightfull prospects nor step aside to haue his sorrowfull minde supported Hee cannot walke to heare the cherefull and well tuned Birds or to see the pretty Lambes with bleating oratorie craue the dammes comfort limited he is and he must giue attendance But more base I deeme it when Sathan so shall fetter a man that hee may not behold Gods holy Temple where hee may haue his sorrowfull soule solaced with Preachers breath more sweete then South-west winde that hee cannot heare Gods sweete wel-tuned Birdes nor see Gods Lambes desiring milke 69 DEath strikes to some a dreadfull terrour others are not moued at his terrible countenance but by their hardines despise death Some when hee comes giues him a cheereful welcome The first is base and seruile the second is courage without skill the third is truely valiant Lord giue mee a resolute heart that when I shall bee dangerously sicke I may not faint Let mee haue courage guided with skill and skill armed with courage that when death shal cast his rufull dart I may giue thee my heart and leauing this world I may feed my mind with higher thoughts and more excellent contemplations longing to be in heauen my delightfull country and my heauenly dwelling 70 HOnour oft fetches his earth where hee will grow from out of the popular sort so lowe dunghills are fetcht to fairest fields but whiles the poore earth is thus exalted it gets a new quality and holds no more his former then the child that hath leaue to play holds the last part of his lesson Times alter natures honors change manners So such as haue disdained all chamber delights now like and entertaine them with pleasant discoursing Those who would not thinke a thought that is not weighed by wisdome and vertue now can cherish most abominable actions O Lord though thou shouldst set mee high yet let me know a vertuous heart will neuer yeeld to villany 71 FRiendship now a dayes is so rare as it is to bee doubted whether it bee a thing indeede or but a word most make loue to others and yet loue no body but themselues sweet termes and kindest courtesie things ordinarye when yet their heartes within bee naughty But howsoeuer their walke bee close yet often-times their owne feet betray them for they themselues vtter themselues to be but enemies O il imployed courtesie I beare great honour to a friend that is hearty but Lord let me loath hippocrisie and all such humane inhumanity I know some friends whose wordes bring forth actions God blesse them and continue them vnto me but if euer it fall that I loose them I shall haue hearty mourning for the losse of their sweet conuersation 72 GOd is too strong for my poore power to resist hee can either with cunning or with force or rather by his cunning force disfigure and deface me as he gaue me a timely birth so hee can giue mee an vntimely death O then how great soeuer my other busines bee Oh most mighty God I wil most willingly wait on thee though my weake body bee as a ruinous house yet thou canst make mee dwell in safetie 73 IN my time I haue met with strange and vnpleasant changes Oft I haue found ouer-vehement constancy hath proued sodaine Apostacie and pleasant company turn'd to be the forgers of folly This hath made me cry out A constant Louer is an admirable Creature But though such bee the times I am resolued to carry my selfe in all my demeanour so constantly that I will indure any extremity rather then in her sweetest growth to destroy vertue 74 IF Hippocrites bee once vnmasked fame will bee verie prodigall of so notable an accident and all will vnderstand what before the fortifier of wickednesse had concealed It will make mountaines of their sinnes and ouer these the hipocrite as a tossing and tottering ship on wallowing waues shall mount aloft to be straight carried downe to the pit of hellish darkenesse Thus shall they bee carried by the tirranny of fames blast And the longer they liue in sin the more wayward will fame bee to them Lord keep me from all close dissembling that such outragious waues may neuer shake me 75 SOmetimes with heedfull obseruation I haue beheld the water Spaniells sport he hunts the diuing Ducke he waites to spye her rise againe hee swims he snuffles hee in weedes himselfe and all to please his maister and make him sportfulnesse O what a wretch is man that imitates not this Creatures dilligence Euen with my strongest desire I wish I may shew more sedulity in seruing my father heauenlily least this Creatures dilligence doe shamefully condemne me 76 MAny vile things we see to which wee are carried with an eager and impatient delight which things whiles thus we disorderly loue wee disguise our bodies and disfigure our mindes but then especially if led with swiftnesse of desire any thing crosse vs. Loue crost is a monstrous Lyon and like a valiant beast with open Iawes it teares vs. I haue said in my heart then I will looke to my wayes my desires shall bee to thee O Lord. Not whatsoeuer likes me shall bee beutifull but what likes thee shall bee to me delightfull 77 THis world is
to them wee then take liberty to loose the raines to our senses delights and our reason now seruile to passion accepts no satisfaction without inioying But O how oft haue I beene taught that poysoned drinke may be in a golden cup. When I see then a woman of beauty I le watch if I can spy any vertue If I descry none I le not care a straw for her company 89 A Blessed man he is that hath such qualities as he is beloued in all good companies whose society draws to godlines but cursed are those whose foule courses cary men to wickednes To which not onely nature bends them but the base bringing vp they receiue at their Parents hands confirmes them But if hee that sets a a traueller out of his way commits villany so these drawing out of the way of heauen shall smart for such iniquity 90 THe children of God me thinkes are full of beauty I finde in them most louely sweetnesse Lambes they bee and therefore gentle Doues they bee and therefore simple The wicked mee thinkes are full of deformity I finde in them most loathsome bitternesse Dogges they bee and therefore currish Swine they bee and therefore swinish Oh then I will much and greatly delight in the blessed Saints and detest the cursed doers For the Lamb and the Doue are two pretty Creatures but the Dogge and the Hogge are sullen beasts 91 THe dainty varieties of pleasing delights that be among the wicked draw mens minds with easie consent to vanitie sometimes short and suddaine delights sometimes long and pleasant deuises are offered but all be higher points staires to sin oh that man knew the great growing of the stinking weed of sin virtue growes not without exquisite labour sin alone willingly vertue springs after a long season sinne quickly in a short space gets vp yea sin though but a sparke sets all on fire presently I purpose then that mine eies shal be watchfull and my heart resolute that not the least weed of sin shall grow in me for I see of a little kernell growes a great tree of a little spawne a great fish 92 THe outward duties of Gods seruice I see haue long holily beene obserued by many but the inward and hearty duties I feare mee of a few Call vpon our formalists to practise some noble deeds of vertue heereto you shall find them smally enclyned But did they serue GOD aright their minds so well trained and long exercised in vertue would giue some rare demonstration of it As for me I euer wil conceiue To goe to Church for fashion is an abuse of Religion and to pray without deuotion is breath to no purpose 93 SVch heaps of sorrows accompany this life as require a vertuous resolutiō of mind to passe them ouer sometimes heauines of heart assailes vs strange stories scarre vs dangerous sicknesse afflicts vs and wee cannot be quiet but long to be in our delightfull country and heauenly dwelling Hence this hath bene my resolute thought He that will hould out the yeare must bide the winter and summer and he that will goe to Heauen must indure the miseries of this world 94 IF wee could behold an armed man of an extreame and vnresistable force whose violence a thousand thousand could not withstand it would breed in vs some maruailous contemplations but greater extreamer force and violence wee know in sin yet we are no whit amazed at it Angells in heauen men on earth are weake to conquer sin But thankes be to Christ that hath gotten victory But since sins force is so violen◠I le rufully eye him but not come nigh him A sword hath a sharp point and a Cannon a great force but let them alone and they will doe no harme 95 SVch is the foule basenesse of Man as the very beasts out stripe him yea and in many things doe teach him Some hypocrites there be artificially smoothing vp and smothering sinne which haue not art enough to learne to auoid it although the dumb creatures instruct them Haue I not seene a dog reioyce at the sight of his Master when his vnchast Mistris will frowne at his comming home Oh fact full of wretchednesse fuller of disgrace and fullest of guiltinesse Oh Lord keepe mee that my affections be not drunken with such beastly sinnes and that I may not be gouerned by them 96 VVIth vnspeakeable griefe I haue thought on the abominable wrongs offred by cruell men to GODS poore Saints that should haue greatest kindnesse Poore hearts by lofty spirits are broken with vnkindnesse and affliction Yet comfort comes from aboue which cheeres their vitall spirrits But oh how these throughly wound their consciences and will God suffer these wrongs Oh no but he will shake the seat of these secure Tyrants Me thinkes they are worse then souldiers stabd at heart For hee that is wounded at hart hath made an end of his daies but hee that hath a wound in his soule knowes not when to end his sorrow 97 SVch as were neerely acquainted with sinne and haue discarded it know the poysonful disposition of it it spreads it selfe as dead poyson in a cup and like a plague infects the soundest persons vertue is not so spreading not so speedie in conueying I maruaile not then why so many be bad and so few good It is because truth hath much a doe to be beleeued but a lie runnes farre before it be stayed 98 O Full often hath my breast swollen with eager desire of heauen for when I beheld the earth mine eyes being my diligent intelligencers carryes me to much comfortablenesse In this world weepings and mournings changings and turnings vanity and folly euery where abounds and he that is in highest estate euen as a poore wretch with languishing steps runs fast to his graue But in heauen are all incomparable excellencies and vneffable dignities Oh sweet and noble place to bee in I le be more glad then Children be of sweet meat to go to such a country and to dwell in this neuer enough praised City The vigor of mens wit that can shew it selfe in any subiect must here be blunted they cannot speake enough of this euer-noble City if they compare it with the country they shewe therein most rude simplicity if with the Court Alasse a Rich Court is a goodly sight but he that lookes vp to Heauen will not care for the world 99 WHo so when they see good can loue it and affect it I count such persons my principal friends whose acquaintance I would not superficially entertaine for sure there is no ioy in our life if we inioy not such companions with such I learne holy helpes to heauen and happy resolutions with such I am instructed to conquer passions but he that flies from good and scoffes at God I count him already with the Diuell And though hee walke in the world yet he hath a hell in his conscience This shal be then mine earnest intreaty vnto God that such good and worthy friends which bee this worlds comfort may not bee drawne away from me by my bad desert 100 MEn haue in vse a two-fould Glasse One most for the proud Man the other for the Wise The proud man whiles hee lookes in his Glasse waxes the prouder The humble whiles on his he waxes the wiser O Lord grant while the proud Mans Looking-Glasse makes him the prouder my Houre-Glasse may make me wise to remember my ende FINIS