so far mistook them as to suspect they might be in earnest when they profest to advance the power of Godliness Decay of Christian Piety Pag. 198. in the general hath occasion'd the distinction of Regular and Secular persons and perhaps the prophaneness and debauchery of too too many amongst us who are in the Church as the tares in the field among the wheat hath partly caus'd the unjust distribution our late Pharisees had made of our people into two parties the Godly and the Wicked though many are of opinion that discontent or melancholy makes men for the most part both Monks and Schismaticks or else spiritual pride or wordly interest However it be I will not make exprobrations against either of them with disâ—bliging truths but rather commend what is praise-worthy in them because I would have every Christian to be really devout and precise without entring the Cloister or the Conventicle I am indeed somewhat jealous that the ingaging men to be Religious and Vertuous by other considerations besides their Christian duty hath done some prejudice to Religion for now there be some that fansie self-denial and contempt of the world to belong only to Friers and others that to abstein from swearing and drunkenness is only the part of a Puritan Whereas Christianity binds those duties upon all its professors and every one by his Baptismal vow is bound to perform them though he doth not submit himself to the Rule of S. Francis or the dictates of the Assembly The heavenly mindedness of Carthusians the zeal and laborious preaching of Carmelites and Dominicans the penitent mortifications of Franciscans Non desiderabit tria illa vota ab hominibus reperta qui primum illud unicum votum quod in Baptismo non homini sed Christo nuncupavimus sinceriter pureque servaverit Eras Ench. and the sobriety of Non-Conformists are all contain'd in the Christian Rule and whosoever owns it needs not make new vows wear distinct habits or separate from the Church the better to discharge them but only seriously mind and study the obligations of his Religion and with diligence and sincerity live according to them My design therefore is not to Incloister particular persons Vellem universos Christianos ita vivevere ut qui nunc soli Religiosi vocantur parum Religiosi viderentur but to make a large Monastery of the whole Commonwealth at least to make every family a School of Vertue and Piety and every man an Ascetick and strict liver wishing heartily with Erasmus that they who hitherto have been call'd Precise and Religious by way of appropriation might justly lose that name by the more exemplary lives of all other Christians But though it be my wish it is not my hope in the least to see any such thing come to pass by means of this little volume Many much bigger and better have not been able to effect it they that will not hear Moses and the Prophets nay Christ the Lord himself will be far enough from being perswaded by the meanest of his servants and the truth is it may be the matter of our desires but must never be expected that a general Reformation of manners should follow that of Doctrine among us Nevertheless our indeavours ought not to be wanting though our sanctification be never consummated here below yet we are commanded 2 Cor. 7.1 and should strive to perfect holiness in the fear of God and so though we know that many will so live as that the end of them shall be destruction yet ought we like S. Paul to try all means that by any means we may save some If we convert none of the impenitent we may benefit some better Christians and if our instructing our brethren by word or writing profits none of them yet it may make us take the better heed that after we have preached to others we our selves be not cast-aways Now to this end my chiefest indeavour is to make a Christian devout to make him love God with a sincere love and then make it appear by a hearty obedience a devout love is not only the best part but also the best instrument of Religion as being an irreconcilable enemy to sin a friend or rather a nurse to all vertue No inticement could have drawn penitent Magdalene to her former impurities whilst she washed her dearest Saviours feet with her tears and 't is known by experience that when reading meditation the sight of a dying friend or any such thing hath softned a mans heart into a Religious temper temptations would be then so far from prevailing that they durst not so much as appear before him But when he returns to mind earthly things and hath his thoughts taken up with the concerns of this life he finds that his spiritual strength decays by the same proportions that his love becomes cold and he grows indevout again Love is the queen if not the fountain of passions the great mover and governor of actions and affections could we keep the fire of Divine Love always burning in our breasts it would be the most powerful and best instrument of Holy-living it would make self-denial and the yoke of Christ easie it would make acts of vertue and Religion pleasant and it would make us delight in pleasing God as much as we naturally do in pleasing our selves Therefore I have made it my aim and design in the following Pages to seize upon the affections to inkindle in the hearts of Christians the heavenly flames of the love of God To that end I have represented the more general benefits of God to mankind and especially that of Redemption by the greatest demonstration of love that ever was given the death of Jesus which if duly consider'd would be an irresistible motive to love him I have shewed the power the pleasure and the great advantages of love and I have us'd devout meditations and ejaculations as it were to transport our souls to heaven by love for to adore that God whom love brought down from thence to save us 'T is certain that most of them that perish perish for want of consideration and I have heard dying men wonder at themselves how they could be so stupid as not to mind those things which are of an infinite concern and should rather take up all our thoughts and our cares than be neglected or forgot one only moment Israel doth not understand Isa 1.3 my people doth not consider Love may be said to be that fire which God would have always to burn upon his altar that is Lev. 6.12 in our hearts which are his temple where the sacrifices of good works and the incense of devotion should always be offer'd to him now that sacred fire must have fewel to entertain it it must be nourish'd by reading good books and especially by frequent and pious meditations Wherefore I have indeavour'd as much as I could to feed those holy flames by representing things as they are and I would have every Christian seriously
constitution hence the desuetude of fasting upon appointed days and even of bidding of them and the non-observance of Holy-days and times of solemn devotion hence the slight regard had to the publick worship of God and the seldom receiving of the Lords Supper hence the reservedness unhappy secresie of most people in not acquainting their spiritual guides with the state of their conscience when it needs and not receiving their comforts and directions hence the not sending for the elders of the Church to do their office upon sick persons and the seldom desiring their absolution and hence even in too many of the Clergy the neglect of daily saying Divine Offices as they are commanded and observing other injunctions peculiar to them I may say that it fares with our Church as with some Princes who have their due Sovereignty denied them because they are Christians as if by becoming members and defenders of the Church they were become subject to Pontifical Chairs and Puritan Synods for so many would not have this Church obey'd because 't is Reformed they would not have its laws observ'd because it makes them inferior to Gods as though by not imposing a blind superstitious and oversevere obedience as Rome doth this Church were become uncapable of exercising any authority over her children and requiring any duty from them But I say let those that love JESUS amend this for his sake for the Church is his spouse and hath receiv'd her power from him let them yield a free and Religious obedience to Ecclesiastical injunctions because JESUS hath said he that receiveth you receiveth me It is doubtless our duty so to do and I am sure it will be a good token of a pious heart when we shall obey them in the Lord whom the Lord hath set over us We shall make it appear that we own the Authority of our heavenly King when we are subject to those his officers by whom he now reigns over us to whom he hath given the keys of his kingdom and whom he hath appointed Stewards of his saving Mysteries we shall have a share in the Mysterious representation of the great expiatory sacrifice which by the Church is celebrated in the Eucharist and in those Divine Services and solemn Prayers which the Church offers to God daily and we shall receive the full benefit of being members of the Church and holding communion with it if this were not absolutely requir'd yet I am sure it will be a very acceptable free-will-offering if we do it devoutly and joyfully because we love JESUS and this Christian obedience to the known rational and pious orders of the Church will answer the best part of that ancient and so much magnified self-abnegation vow'd by the Coenobites when they gave up themselves to be in all things rul'd and commanded by their superiors and it will exercise those two heavenly graces meekness and humility which the world despiseth but all true Christians own to be most Divine Mat. 11.29 as they that bring rest to the soul and make us most conformable to the meek and humble JESUS §. 12. Of several voluntary oblations As for corporal austerities commanded or uncommanded I have said something of them already and the chiefest use and design of them is to mortifie sensual lusts and to keep under the body that the spirit may rule and be obey'd yet as they are exercises of repentance marks of the just indignation we conceive against our selves for having displeas'd God as they may effect or express a disrelish of temporal pleasures a longing for heavenly joys and an indeavour to take up our cross and follow JESUS they may be the matter of a free-will-offering and they may find a gracious reward and acceptance in so much as they proceed from a sincere love to JESUS Prayer also thanksgiving reading meditation acts of Religion though as to the substance they be the discharge of the greatest duty God requires of us the worship and adoration of his Divine Majesty yet as to the quantity they may become free oblations the expressions of a greater love He that with devout affections inlargeth his offices or counts the frequency of them by Canonical hours and wish't for opportunities and he that sets apart large portions for religious exercises or in the following of his necessary business doth often lift up his heart and thoughts to heaven and heavenly things makes a voluntary offering of some of his time to him of whose eternity he hopes to be partaker He that defalks some hours from the refreshment of his body to bestow them upon his soul he that chuseth a meaner condition and imployment that having fewer avocations he may spend more time upon Religion and he that bears with some wrongs and injuries that being free from the distractions of quarrels and law-suits he may be the better dispos'd to serve God hath bought the blessed opportunity of attending JESUS and indearing himself to him Charity likewise whether Spiritual or Corporal whether in giving or in forgiving may be carried further than is absolutely required and so become a free oblation He that takes great pains to instruct the ignorant to convert sinners by all means to win souls to JESUS may manifest a greater love than was absolutely necessary to his own salvation and he that makes it his business and delight to prevent quarrels or make reconciliations to comfort and defend the afflicted and oppressed to visit hospitals and relieve the poor and to spend all his substance in pious uses for the honour of God and Religion and for the present and future happiness of men may exceed what God would have rewarded and by shewing so great a love inrich his crown of glory and recompence I only mark the head-springs or store-houses of those arbitrary gifts wherewith men may honour God and enrich themselves the several emanations and offerings which may proceed from them being free and innumerable cannot be specified and should not be impos'd Where there is love there is a willing mind and where there is a willing mind a man in other cases as well as in charity is accepted 2 Cor. 8.12 according to what he hath and not according to what be hath not Some husbandmen sow that they may have wherewith to pay their debts 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 c. S. Johan Clim Grad 26. §. 43. which marks the labours and offerings of penitents who indeavour to make what satisfaction they can for their injuries to God or man Some sow that by the expected crop they may increase their wealth which represents the good works of more innocent persons who aspire to a great reward and a glorious crown Some sow that they may have something wherewith to express their gratitude and make presents to their kind land-lord or benefactor whereby is signified the best of Christians who in all things seek and design the glory and advantage of their Lord. And others sow that they may be thought
dividit inter filios regni aeterni filios perditionis Aug. de Trin. lib. 15. cap. 18. for that love it is makes the difference betwixt sincere and false Christians betwixt those that shall be heirs of salvation and those that shall go to perdition betwixt heaven and hell Many priviledges may belong to the tares while they grow in the same field with the wheat many Sun-shiny-days they may have and many drops of dew and rain may fall upon them but they are not rooted and grounded in love therefore they are pluck'd up and withered and burn'd Many gifts of the Divine Spirit wicked men may receive they may prophesie and do miracles in Christs name they may excel in some vertues but the grace of Charity they never receive the love of God never dwells in their hearts Thou maist be Baptized saith S. Aug. Habere Baptismum malus esse potes habere c. Tract 7. in Epist Johan and yet not be good thou mayst have knowledge and remain vicious thou maist be call'd a Christian and be none but thou canst not love God and be wicked thou canst not love God but thou must be holy and happy Thus we see love affords the greatest pleasure and the greatest safety this world is capable of The love of JESUS is a precious jewel precious beyond gold and the best of pearls Charitas est amor rerum quas nonnisi volentes amittimus Aug. he that hath it hath an infinite treasure and it is so much the more to be valued because we may acquiesce in its possession we can never lose it except we will We may lose our riches and we may lose our health we may lose our learning and our eloquence we may lose our friends and our lives but the love of God we can never lose without our consent no time no fortune no Tyrant can snatch it by force out of our hearts Verum bonum illud est quod non potes invitus amittere Aug. as 't is never given against our will so against our will it can never be taken away Charity never faileth Quinquagesima Sunday O Lord who hast taught us that all our doings without charity are nothing worth send thy Holy Ghost and pour into our hearts that most excellent gift of charity the very bond of peace and of all vertues without which whosoever liveth is counted dead before thee grant this for thine only Son JESUS Christs sake Amen §. 18. Love brings a lasting joy and peace to the Soul The fourth and last consideration is that the love of God is the solid joy and lasting Tranquillity of the Soul No tormenting fear or sadness can harbour in a heart that loves God the Motto of love might well be that of a late order of Knighthood at Mantua mean't of the Holy Chalice Nihil isto triste recepto grief and the love of God are incompatible no sadness should enter that breast wherein dwells Divine Love I need not treat at large of those many doubts and terrors concerning future happiness which grieve and almost distract the hearts of many Christians to prove that it is a happy thing to be freed from them there are few but are so far acquainted with them as readily to assent to it it will be more to purpose to shew that the love of God is the best remedy against them the best balsom to heal a wounded spirit Some persons from their poverty bodily pains or other afflictions draw this most afflictive inference that God is not their friend and that therefore their condition is dangerous and very bad if not quite desperate and this adds such a weight to their cross that they have no strength to bear it but are ready to sink whereas the love of God hath enabled thousands to bear a heavier with patience with fortitude and men with cheerfulness I take pleasure in infirmities and distresses and necessities for Christs sake said S. Paul that great lover of JESUS He that would suffer for God will suffer from God he that would die and be crucified for JESUS will willingly bear that cross which JESUS lays upon his shoulders And indeed 't is a greater vertue meekly and thankfully to accept of that correction wherewith God visits us than voluntarily to inflict the greatest sufferings on our selves what proceeds from God is ever best for us and most pleasing to him No Patient will question the love of that Physician who is his intimate friend for that he makes incisions and applies causticks upon him and makes him drink bitter potions he will not suspect his friends affection he will not doubt but that 't is for his good after this manner he that loves God will receive afflictions from him and gratefully acknowledge with David I know that of very faithfulness thou hast caus'd me to be troubled Knowing that all things work together for the good of them that love God he will harbour no thoughts of diffidence nor question Gods loving kindness to him but rest satisfied that while he loves God nothing can hurt him and that whatever happens is certainly for his greatest advantage But 't is not always the storms of adversity that bring those dark and dismal clouds on the minds of men they come sometimes in fair weather in the greatest prosperity Whence 't is in vain to examine better it is to drive them away for they are as mischievous as black They cast a damp upon mens spirits they freeze their hearts in such a manner that they can receive no spiritual joy they so weaken their hands and feet that they can hardly work for God or walk in his ways so that their condition is sad indeed not because God is their enemy but because they being unreasonably afraid of it are thereby hindred from being his friends To this evil none can prescribe a better remedy than love let such persons love God heartily and all these terrors will vanish away like the vain images of a terrible dream when one awaketh Love begets love therefore we should love God because he first loved us and love begets a confidence of being lov'd again so that if we love God we shall not long doubt but that we are lov'd by him and then all is well And if at first our hearts do not melt into devout affections and are not replenish'd with the sweetness and comfort of love let us not be dismay'd at it nor too much study our own disturbed thoughts and apprehensions but let us continue to give God demonstrations of love to abstein from what he forbids and to do that which he commands or that which will please him though uncommanded and then either holy joys and extasies will come or it will be as well without them No man is afraid of his friends nor of those whom he serves and obligeth we easily suppose that they love us whom we love and that they to whom we do good will be kind to us
1 Cor. 13.5 charity doth not seek her own saith S. Paul we may desire our promised reward and set our affections upon it as it is a demonstration of Gods infinite love and goodness or because it will be the expressing of our duty and thankfulness when we shall love and glorifie and adore God perfectly and for ever or rather because the reward is God himself who will be to every faithful servant his exceeding great reward Gen. 15.4 as well as to faithful Abraham rewarding sincere obedience with the fruition of himself being all in all to his Saints But still I say love is not selfish but free and generous if nothing were to be gain'd by it it would have satisfaction enough in shewing its self 't is an unspeakable pleasure to a devout lover to act and labour for JESUS when he thus thinks with himself by the performance of this duty by this act of vertue by this good work I serve my dearest Lord I oblige my best friend I express my love to him whose infinite kindness to me hath conquer'd my heart whom I love as my own soul and for whom I would willingly die O happy soul who feelest what an exceeding joy it is to love JESUS or rather unhappy soul who canst shew so little love to JESUS Unhappy necessities of a frail body unhappy distractions of a troublesome world Why am I by you depriv'd of the continual pleasure of waiting continually on my Divine and most loving Master But blessed be my gracious Lord that I might have more opportunities of pleasing him and expressing my affections to him he hath made vertues of necessities he hath turn'd nature into grace and of humane duties he hath made acts of Religion in relieving mine own and others wants If I observe the rules of sobriety and charity he takes thence occasion to bless and reward me as if he were thereby glorified in discharging the duties of my place and calling If I am diligent and faithful though my work be never so mean he owns it as a service done to him Servants saith S. Paul obey your masters in all things Col. 3.22 and do it heartily as to the Lord and not to men 23. knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance for ye serve the Lord Christ If I am consciencious in all my ways and works he takes it as a mark of my love and part of my duty to him O that the constant course of my conversation might speak the sincerity of my affection to my Blessed Lord. Dearest JESUS the Cross thou didst bear for me was heavy and painful to extremity but thy yoke is light and pleasant thy service is perfect freedom O let it be my delight and daily imployment as it is my duty to serve and obey thee to follow thy blessed example and be instrumental in winning hearts to thee let me love thee so intirely that I may love nothing but thee nothing but for thy sake Fac precor Domine B. Ansel me gustare per amorem quod gusto per cognitionem sentiam per affectum quod sentio per intellectum Amen §. 6. We belong to Jesus and are not our own Love regards not so much what is commanded as who it is that commands it if it be the Beloved requires any thing love doth it cheerfully without reluctancy another with earnest begging should not have that granted which the least word of a friend shall obtain The commands of Christianity are easie and most rational in keeping of them consisteth our present and future happiness Yet the ture lover of JESUS looks farther he considers that it is his God and Saviour who would have him obey he to whom he belongs to whom he ows himself and infinitely more for every Christian ows JESUS to JESUS who gave himself for him The old saying was emendus cui imperes buy your slaves buy those that will be commanded by you none of us can say so to the God whom we serve for he hath indeed bought us Ye are not your own saith S. Paul ye are bought with a price thence it is strongly infer'd therefore glorifie God in your body and in your spirit which are Gods We are not at our own dispose our Divine Master hath a most just propriety in us we are wholly his and would to God we were his as much by affection and resignation as by right the price he hath paid for us is no less than himself he hath given his life that ours might be his We were redeem'd from our vain conversation by the precious blood of Christ who died for us that we might live to him he could get nothing by that dear purchase but our love only for we were his before it is he that made us only we had estrang'd our selves from him and plac't our love upon other things and he could not count us his own while we loved him not §. 7. Meditation our obligation to serve JESUS I must therefore consider whose I am I am Christs by a strong and incontestable title while I serve him I do that proper work which belongs to me whilst I obey what he hath commanded I do what is infinitely my duty what his love to me challengeth and what my love to him desires to return Had I ten thousand years to live and could I serve him all that while and do nothing else I could not repay him for the least part of that great ransom he hath paid for me neither could I deserve any thing of those great wages which he will give me my life is but short and he allows me time for other things even for pleasure and recreation I have therefore a most gracious Master and therefore I resolve and promise to do what he requires of me I will except at nothing he commands it shall be my joy to pay my duty to him and I will make it appear that I serve out of love and affection Vae miserae animae quae Christum non quaerit nec amat arida manet misera c. Aug. Man O my dearest JESUS would my heart did feel what it should would I could express what it feels and would I could perform as much as I express But O my Blessed Lord how frequently and unhappily do I forget that thou art my Master and I thy servant that my chiefest business is to do thy will and that my greatest happiness as well as duty is to obey thee Is it not because I also forget that thou didst redeem me from a most wretched slavery that thou didst pay an immense price for me that thou becamest a servant for me before thou requiredst any service from me and that thou didst first love me before thou did intreat my love O thou great Lover and Saviour of men I wholly give my self to thee body and soul heart and affections I desire to be thine I pray that thou wouldst make me
we look for the Saviour the Lord Jesus Christ that whatsoever things are true 4.8 honest just pure lovely of good report any vertue any thing praise-worthy may be our constant study and practice We must labour that whether present or absent we may be accepted of our Lord 2 Cor. 5.9 because we shall all appear before him and receive according as we obey him now in his absence §. 9. Incouragements to obey Jesus All this and much more to the same purpose which I have read and observed in the Sacred Books of the New Testament hath convinc'd me that it is the design of Christian Religion to make me meek and humble sober and contented just and charitable devout and religious vertuous and holy this I own to be my duty and I will indeavour my self heartily to perform the same And that I may do it with cheerfulness â—nd affection I will stir and quicken â—he holy fire of love in my heart by pâ—ous considerations When any duty to God or man calls upon me for acâ—ion and performance and I find in my soul too much of dulness or reluctancy I will again by meditation suppose my dying Saviour present telling me how much he hath done and suffered for me and desiring me as I love him to do that duty which lies before me Christian if thou dost understand the greatness of my love which brought me here to die for thee if thou art sensible of it and wouldst make any return for it do this obey this command this may be the last thing thou shalt ever do for me this may be the last tryal of thy love sure it would grieve thee to have denied this small request to him that gives his life that gives himself for thee Or else I will suppose my self in the presence of my Divine Master sitting on his heavenly throne with his glorified servants about him shewing me the crown he hath assign'd to me and saying N. N. wilt thou deny to do this at my earnest request wilt thou be so unkind to me Sure I have deserved better at thy hands than so sure I who am much above thee have done much more for thee than that comes to but besides I would highly recompence thee These my friends I have rewarded with the bliss and glory they enjoy for having done such things for me and I would reward thee as bountifully here is eternal life eternal rest eternal glory for thy recompence as thou lovest me as thou lovest thy self obey that thou maist be happy To this what answer could I make but such as this Lord not only this but any thing else thou hast commanded I am willing to fulfil and obey I bewail my dulness and depraved nature that makes me so unready so unactive in thy service but Lord thou knowest that I love thee I would undertake any labour any trouble to make it appear I would die to justifie it Yet sweetest JESU I beg of thee to increase my love to increase it to such a degree that like thy heavenly attendants I may burn with that Divine fire and be all love to thee Sund. 25. after Trinity that so I may be always prepar'd and desirous to do thy will Stir up we beseech thee O Lord the wills of thy faithful people that they plenteously bringing forth the fruit of good works may of thee be plenteously rewarded through JESUS Christ our Lord. Amen Love is the fulfilling of the Law Christian Reader I hope that what I have writ thou wilt also read and repeat heartily in the first Person for to that end I have thus contriv'd it to ingage thine affections to make thee speak as of thy self these soliloquies acts of love and acts of resolution which run throughout the whole discourse and I would have thee use that method which may much affect thee to make dialogues betwixt thy Saviour and thy soul and betwixt thy soul and thy self for certain it is that for thee N. N. by name JESUS was crucified and died and certain it is that thou thy self shalt die and be judged and rise again to an intolerable eternity if by carelessness and inconsideration thou hast been unmindful of thy Lord and thy soul or else rise again to eternal joys if thou hast sincerely lov'd and serv'd JESUS Job 15 10 If ye keep my Commandments ye shall abide in my love even as I have kept my Fathers Commandments and abide in his love §. 10. Of free-will-offerings Thus much of necessity must be done my duty as well as my love constrains me to it Not to break negative precepts and to obey positive ones that is to cease from sin and to work righteousness is required of me if I do it by love I have made my task pleasant but yet a task it is which must be fulfill'd Not but that there is mercy for sins against the New-covenant for the transgression of Gospel precepts there is joy in heaven at the conversion of a sinner what ever his sins have been and it ought greatly to indear God to us that he is so willing to forgive so desirous to have us repent that we may be capable of his pardon but whether soon or late whether after crying guilts or ordinary sins still I say there must be a true contrition a sorrow and repentance for our sins proceeding from the love of God and a sincere indeavour to please and obey him for the future and so thus far we are drawn by a moral necessity by the desire of our own happiness which is not to be obtain'd any other way But shall we stay just here and not go one step further than is required 't is well indeed when we are safe and that must be secur'd first of all and with the greatest care but shall our love proceed no further Sure that Christian who is best assur'd of his salvation will love God most of all and make to him the greatest and most hearty returns When a man is qualified for heaven and enjoys the greatest happiness this world is capable of that is a sense of Gods favour and a well-grounded assurance of a future bliss his soul cannot but melt into the most affectionate love for that gracious God whose mercy and loving kindness hath brought him into that happy condition and fitted him by his grace for a much happier and they I say that are in such a case for to them only I now speak may well do something more than what needs they must may well enlarge their affections to God beyond the bounds of prescribed duties it is a good sign a sign of a sincere and a pious heart when a man is forward to undertake for God when he doth not weigh grains and scruples lest he should part with any of his right and liberty but affords God a full measure and running over and think he never gives enough and still desires that he might do infinitely more for him 'T is true
we may claim in him Sure 't is an easie thing to love them that love us Nimis durus est animus qui amorem eisi nolebat dare nolit tamen rependere Aug. and where God hath exprest so much love 't is strangely unnatural if we are not affected with it Prov. 19.6 Every man is a friend to him that giveth gifts saith the Wiseman Now what gifts hath our God given us or rather what gifts hath he not given us and what perverse violence do they offer nature that seek to confute Solomons saying in this instance where it should be most true Certainly 't is an easie thing to love infinite perfections and infinite goodness one that ever did and ever doth us good from whom we daily receive favours so great and so many that we can tell neither their worth nor number Wherefore S. Aug. saith Potes mihi dicere non habeo quod tribuam egenti non possiâ—m jejunare non possiâ—m flere Numquid potes mihi dicere charitatem habere non possum c. that to love God is so natural so easie so infinitely just and so much our duty that to omit it can admit of no plea nor pretence and is inexcusable and criminal in the highest degree Perhaps thou wilt say I cannot fast I cannot weep I have not what to give to the poor but canst thou say I cannot love God is there any obstacle in thy way dost thou want inducements or a heart to do it No doubtless 't is the easiest thing in the world to love him that is most lovely to love our greatest benefactor to love him who is infinitely kind and loving to us Some vertues require opportunities and cannot be exercised for want of them but whether thou beest sickly or healthy whether thy condition be high or low whether thy leisure be much or little whether thy calling be easie or laborious thou maist love love doth not pinch the belly Facilis res est Domine JESV CHRISTE superamande dilectio a qua nullus cujuscunque status gradus aut conditionis existat excusari potest c. Idiot wearies not the hands makes not the head ake empties not the purse for love is neither grief nor pain 't is easie to all men none can plead any excuses against it §. 15. An Objection answer'd Now here I will digress a little to answer two Objections which possibly might be made against what I have said of Divine Love The first that I have humaniz'd it too much that whereas it is supernatural and should be spiritual I have made it almost palpable and sensible To this I say that whether we set our love upon earthly or heavenly things upon God or upon the world still it is the same passion which resides in the same humane faculty The will of man and the effects thereof are alike evident and real He that truly loves God hath that same hearty affection for him as to the kind as one friend hath for another a sincere lover of JESUS will seek to please him and to be with him and to enjoy him and do all that for him which men would do for those whom they love heartily all the difference is that Divine Love hath its proper expressions can never be too great and is in all respects infinitely more excellent than the love of any creature Therefore if in some places I have represented things plainly and made that in some manner to be touch't by sense which is only the object of faith my design was thereby to move the affections and to bring down the notions of Religion from the head into the heart Heb. 11.1 Faith should be the substance of things hoped for the evidence of things not seen We should consider things of faith whether past or to come as if they had now a real subsistence as if they were present before our eyes their greatness then would be better view'd and have the greater power upon us 27. as Moses who by consideration seeing him who is invisible was thereby enabled to prefer the afflictions of Gods people to the pleasures and dignities of the Courts of Pharaoh I believe it was a great advantage to the Piety of Primitive ages that they liv'd near the time when those things were acted which we now believe at a greater distance for then the Revelations of the New Testament were every Christians discourse and admiration the proximity of the times made them almost visible and the recent foot-steps of those great transactions gave them a kind of sensibility whereby their thoughts and considerations were drawn and retain'd and made serious and efficacious And I believe it may be a great cause of the degeneracy of these latter ages that faith is become too notional too metaphysical and abstracted whereas we should vest the great objects of our faith with material circumstances to make them in some manner the object of sense that to us it might be said as S. Gal. 3.1 Paul to the Galatians Before your eyes JESUS CHRIST hath been evidently set forth crucified among you and that in all other instances our faith might be to us the evidence of things not seen When we look upon the things of revelation as far distant from us they appear hardly credible and not much to be regarded but a closer viewing of them by a nearer and almost sensible consideration would make them appear great and wonderful would make deep and lasting impressions on our minds and cause us to cry out with grief and wonder Lord what is man that thou art thus mindful of him or rather what is man that he is unmindful of thee However I have the warrant and do claim the priviledge of them that write contemplative meditations to represent things as present and visible and well we may especially when we treat of the love of God shewed to mankind in JESUS for that love became palpable and converst among men and was manifested to sense in the birth the actions and the sufferings of our Blessed Saviour who by becoming man seem'd to comply with that unjust and yet general desire which men had of worshipping humane creatures and having things visible and material for the object of their devotion and Religious love §. 16. A second objection answer'd The other Objection would perhaps be made by them who scruple and refuse to bow at the Holy name of JESUS and who might say that I have mention'd it too often and too often call'd Divine Charity The love of JESUS and that in so doing I have been either superstitious or injurious to God To this I answer That as our Blessed Saviour saith He that hateth me Joh. 15.23 hateth my father also so we may say that he that loveth him loveth his father also For the Father the Son and Holy Ghost are one and the same God blessed for ever 1 Joh. 5.1 he that loveth him that begat loveth also him
therefore let us shew to God all the love we can and by words and actions protest that we seek to please him and our hearts will soon be possest with a blessed assurance that we are dear to him and he will never be cruel and severe to us 'T is reported of a Religious Person whose soul was griev'd and wounded with doubts and fears and with sadness that while he was one day weeping and praying thus O that I were sure that I shall persevere and never fall from God O that I were sure that God loves me and that I shall one day see his Blessed Face how zealous then should I be in mortifying my sins and doing my duty how cheerfully should I serve God every day and take pleasure in suffering for him how would I despise the world and its vanities and fix my thoughts and affections on things above while he was thus expressing the sorrows of his troubled mind he heard the whispers of a secret voice which told him fac quod faceres do now what thou wouldst do if thou hadst all those assurances With this he found himself so affected and refresh'd that he took it as an Oracle from heaven and in obeying of it found those comforts he begg'd Better counsel I cannot give thee fac quod faceres do what thou wouldst do if thy diffident timorousness and jealousies were confuted by a voice from heaven and they 'll soon be remov'd Let thy meek submission thy sincere obedience and thy free-will-offerings speak thy love to God and thou shalt soon find thy self perswaded that God loves thee dearly and that thy condition is safe and happy Other assurance we are not to expect in this world and this is not to be obtain'd any other way should thy comfort proceed from any thing else but thine humble and devout love to God it would be fansie and presumption whereas so it is well-grounded and never can deceive thee 1 Joh. 4.18 There is no fear in love saith Divine S. John but perfect love casteth out fear 't is never otherwise grace and nature joyn together to make the effect infallible that a Holy Love should ever produce a Holy Peace if we love indeed and in truth 1 Joh. 3.18 thereby not by new and secret revelations we shall know that we are of the truth and we shall assure our hearts before God Love may well work confidence and joy in our souls for it injoys already what it loves it is affectuosa unitas unitiva affectio love is inseparable from its object and the essence thereof consists in their union if not unity Though God be exalted infinitely above all things in a sphere of Glory and Majesty so high that the Cherubim with their many wings cannot flie up to it Qui mente integra Deum desiderat profecto jam habet quem amat Greg. Mag. yet thither love sores up and takes God and holds him as his own so that every one that loves God is already possest of him and may say with the spouse I am my Beloveds and my Beloved is mine Cant. 6.3 We come to God by love S. Aug. amando non ambulando and to him we are united by love Magna res est amor quo anima per semetipsam fiducialiter accedit ad Deum c. amore Deo conjungimur therefore love is a great thing saith that devout father it brings the soul to God with an holy confidence and makes it trust in him and cleave stedfastly to him and rejoyce in him and represent her needs and beg his mercies with fiducial and devout affections And this is so great a truth that death it self with its pains and sorrows alters nothing of it even then in the last agonies the love of God sweetens the bitter cup and still entertains the soul with joy and holy comforts It was the saying of S. Aug. that because the soul hath willingly forsaken God whom she should love infinitely she is forc'd therefore with grief and regret to forsake her body which she loves too much and that because she voluntarily departed from God who is her life Aug. de Trin. lib. 4. cap. 13. she therefore departeth from the body whose life she is with sadness and much reluctancy Now we may say that when the soul returns to God by love Charitis libertatem donat timorem pellit c. S. Bern. she is freed from this punishment and restor'd to her first liberty she is willing to die for to be with Christ and then comes a cheerful cupio dissolvi O when shall I come and appear before God Happy is he who living doth so manifest his love to God by Piety and Charity that dying he can say with Theodosius Dilexi love hath been the business and delight of my life I have daily indeavour'd by my actions to declare the sincerity of my love to God he is doubtless of the number of those that love the appearing of JESUS and so he goes out to meet him with joy and confidence expecting a kind reception from him Nemo se amari diffidat qui jam amat libenter Dei amar nostrum quem praevenit subsequitur c. Bern. whom having not seen yet he lov'd and worship'd and serv'd affectionately Let no man that loves God doubt of God's Love to him for he that lov'd us when we were his enemies so as to die for us will much more love us when we have for him the hearty affections of friends It is the joy of heaven the joy of the Holy JESUS when his loving kindness hath won and conquer'd our hearts and 't is our greatest joy 't is for us a heaven upon earth when we love him faithfully and fervently with all our souls and affections The love of God brings that peace to the soul which the world can neither give nor take away Her sins which are many Luke 7.47 are forgiven because she loved much §. 19. The Close Now who can refuse to love God when 't is a thing so just and reasonable so pleasant and easie so safe and advantageous something of necessity we must love every mans heart is full of that passion and every mans life is govern'd by it 't is but considering who hath done most for us and whom we are most oblig'd to love who is most lovely and who will best reward our love and we shall soon understand that God is to be lov'd above all things infinitely without measure and if we love our selves as we should we shall easily remove our affections from the world to set them upon God and Eternity upon JESUS and his kingdom Love as we have seen will make it easie and delightful to do our duty Onus sine onere portat Kemp. will make the yoke of Christ light and enable us with strength and courage to bear our cross cheerfully like Christians it will lead us the shortest and the safest way to
a Holy Life hath been so fully evinc'd and asserted and all things that pertain to life and godliness so cleerly and learnedly explain'd by Catholick Writers Ancient and Modern especially many Pious Fathers and Sons of this Church since the Reformation that I shall not insist upon the fundamentals either of Faith or Practice to inforce it As indeed my design is not to instruct but to move the affections not to argument or explain but to draw inferences from known and granted premises to administer prudential helps and Religious counsels and by devout meditations to affect the heart §. 16. An invitation unto the Cloister of love I ask therefore hast thou conceived a fair Idea of Christianity hast thou observ'd the glory and greatness of it's Mysteries the holiness of it's Doctrine and the perfection of its precepts and counsels hast thou consider'd and admir'd the great exemplar of all vertues the Holy JESUS author of this Holy Institution hast thou read his life with an observing eye and hast thou view'd the fair copies of this perfect Original which have been drawn by many of his Saints in the imitation of his example hast thou weigh'd the excellency of his promises the great immunities and the invaluable advantages which belong to his followers hast thou seriously ponder'd the great obligations which the love of JESUS hath laid upon thee and art thou desirous to be happy by loving again and being grateful If so enter this Cloister love JESUS and thou shalt reign with JESUS The Cloister I mean is not the precinct of a particular Abbey or the confinement of a narrow Cell but the Catholick Church whose inclosure is large enough to entertain all the Religions in the world all that are of the Christian Order And the Rule I would have thee follow is not that of any Founders nor even that of Pachomius said to have been brought down by Angels but that which the Son of God himself delivered the Gospel-rule the Christian Laws and appointments hath not God given his Beloved Son the heathen for his inheritance Psal 2. and the utmost parts of the earth for his possession Cursic arctcmus Christi professionem quam ille latissime voluit patere ego certe sic optarim Evangelicam Religionem sic omnibus esse cordi c. Ench. Why then saith Erasmus Should we confine the excellency and perfection of Christianity to particular places Why should we make that short and narrow which Christ would have to be of an universal extent If it be words we affect is not a City a great Monastery the Abbot whereof is the Bishop set over it by Christ Would to God the Christian Rule were so well belov'd and observ'd that no man might look or desire the Benedictin or Franciscan I say so too all this is true and to be wished yet the universal comprehends many particular Churches and the Christian Rule hath also many several interpretations therefore to be plain and positive the Church of England as the purest part or member of the Catholick which hath repurg'd corrupt innovations and maintains a Blessed Conformity with Antiquity is that which I recommend to thee above all others and for the best interpretation of the Sacred Canon the Doctrine and Worship of this Church is that which I would have thee prefer to all the rest §. 17. The vow to be taken at the entrance of it But because I speak not to dissenters nor intend to dispute with them thou wilt say that thou hast entred this Cloister already and hast undertaken it's Rule but though it be so thou mayst do it the second time by a second choise an after-election Thou didst not come of thy self but wast brought in when first thou entred'st this society and 't was by a proxy thou promisedst to observe the orders of it therefore now that thou hast the use of reason 't is very necessary thou shouldst do it again by a free and considerate act of thine own will Ratifie then thy former ingagements by being confirm'd Quod summum est id omnibus est enitendum ut saliem mediocria assequamur nec est quod ullum vitae genus ab hoc scopo submoveamus c. Eras if thou art not and if thou art by a hearty and sincere indeavour to perform thy vows and promises which are as follows First To renounce the Devil and all his works the pomps and vanities of this wicked world with all covetous desires of the same and the sinful lusts of the flesh Secondly To believe all the Articles of the Christian Faith And thirdly To keep Gods Holy Will and Commandments and walk in the same all the days of thy life This vow contains all thy duty the highest pitch of Christian perfection rules for the most Regular and Spiritual Life let thy serious application and earnest indeavour to observe it discriminate and sever thee from the prophane and less Religious world Thou needest no distinct inclosure no distinct habits no distinct patrons or offices thy sincere Study thy Religious care to discharge this obligation will sufficiently cloister thee in from the looser society and conversation of men and will make a difference great enough betwixt thee and them But though thou dost remain in the civil society of the world and the neighborhood of thy neighbour yet various are the ways that lead through the world to heaven and here I undertake to teach thee a sure and short one through which all glorified Saints have past Some persons here Qui timendo non facit male male faceret si liceret itaque etsi facultas non datur voluntos retinetur August in Psal 32. are eminent in one vertue some in another some are guided by hope and some by fear Many different are the considerations and helps whereby men are brought to make themselves happy in doing their duty but the motive the guide the way Dilectio est via rectissima absque devio via brevis absque taedio via plana absque tumulo via clara absque nubilo via secura absque periculo c. Idiot Cont. the instrument I recommend to thee above all others is Love Love is the strongest motive the surest guide the safest way the best instrument in the world to live well to keep thee from wandring to bring thee to heaven to conquer all oppositions and do the work of God thoroughly Love hath a general intendance over all vertues and duties and makes them pleasant to us and acceptable to God Love is the fulfilling of the Law Love and thou canst never do amiss love and thou canst never miscarry §. 18. Of Love and first of Self-love Love is the common prince and parent of other passions as they all take their Laws so they take their Origine from it Or to speak more properly Amor inhians habere quod amatur cupiditas est idem habens eoque fruens laetitia ect fugiens quod
me through with many sorrows lust inticeth me to wound me when I have consented to it and pride promiseth me honors to cumber me and expose me to envy JESUS is infinitely lovely he is all perfection and goodness and he desires to be loved not for any advantage of his own but to make his lovers intirely and eternally happy but you painted idols of abused mortals are in your selves ugly and even loathsome though at a great distance ye may seem somewhat fair yet near at hand ye are nothing but deformity ye always prove vain and vexatious ye seek to enter mens hearts only to tyrannize and torment them and betray them to eternal sorrows JESUS is a true and constant lover he ever owns his friends he never fails them that love him he helps them in their distresses he comforts them in their sorrows and when they die he stands by them but ye temporal deceitful pleasures are false and inconstant ye forsake your friends in their greatest need ye flatter them for a few Summer days while the Sun shines kindly upon them but in the rigors of Winter when an unprosperous storm ariseth you are gone ye leave them to die comfortless they carry nothing of you when they go from hence but the bitter remembrance of your treacherousness JESUS is a most grateful lover he ever returns love for love he is ever found of them that seek him to them that desire him he ever gives himself every true lover of JESUS is sure to injoy him but you worldly injoyments are generally most unkind to your most passionate lovers ye flee from them that run after you ye grieve and vex your greatest admirers ye are ever uncertain false and ungrateful I will therefore never love you again nay I resolve to hate and persecute you to mortifie the lusts of my flesh to humble the pride of my heart and overcome the covetous desires of my mind but JESUS shall reign in my heart him will I love him will I serve him will I indeavour to please in all things I will be wholly his therefore I renounce all friendship with you that are his enemies there can be no agreement betwixt the Holy JESUS and this sinful world If any man love the world 1 Joh. 2.15 the love of the father is not in him §. 26. Of the antipathy betwixt sin and Jesus Fleshly lusts are against the purity of JESUS pride is against his humility and wordly-mindedness contrary to his heavenly promises and his mercifulness These are never to be reconcil'd with JESUS they are mortal enemies mortal I may call them because they were his murtherers or rather because he died to put them to death We were not redeem'd with corruptible things as silver and gold from our vain conversation but with the precious blood of Christ JESUS shed his blood to redeem us as well from the practice and commission as from the punishment and destruction of sin Nay the first is that which he chiefly design'd because though we should not be punish'd yet if we remain in sin we are unhappy holiness being the ultimate end perfection and happiness of man Blessed are the pure in heart for without holiness no man shall see God S. Paul therefore saying that Christ died unto sin that is to take away sin infers from thence Rom. 6. that we being baptized into Christs death our old man is now crucified that the body of sin might be destroy'd that henceforth we should not serve sin and S. Peter likewise makes it the purpose why Christ did bear our sins their punishment on his own body on the tree 1 Pet. 2.24 that we thereby being dead unto sin might live unto righteousness Christ gave himself for us Gal. 1.4 that he might redeem us from this present evil world 1 Joh. 3.8 The Son of God was manifested that he might destroy the works of the Devil Sin is that which God hates above all things sin is that which is most contrary to his nature and to our happiness and so JESUS was crucified that sin might be destroy'd he died that sin might live no longer and therefore I renounc'd all sin the Devil and all his works when JESUS own'd me for his friend and I own'd him for my Lord and Master they are incompatible their inconsistency is irreconcilable if I hold to the one I must despise the other if I love one I must hate the other I will therefore as I am most bound and as I have promis'd forsake sin and follow JESUS I will fight against his enemies and side with him against my own corrupt affections while I have a being I will love and obey JESUS §. 27. Of outward helps and means Now To effect this means are to be us'd for our hearts will not of a sudden be brought to a Religious temper 't is not bare resolutions will make us resist temptations when they assault us with their most prevailing inticements grace indeed is never wanting to us but if we be wanting to our selves we receive it in vain if we second it not with our indeavours we make it ineffectual Now among private means of grace for I speak not of those that may be had in the Church in the dispensation of the word and Sacraments belonging to all fasting alms and prayers which are also acts of Religion may hold the first rank But besides them there are other adminicula pietatis instruments of holy contrition handmaids to devotion which though they be indifferent and uncommanded yet may help to move our affections and secure our duty Such are retirement from the world reading of good Books pious Meditations humble prostrations c. And though needless scruples and rejecting of Ancient Ceremonies be now much in use and credit yet amongst them I will reckon the sign of the Cross which was certainly us'd by Primitive Christians very frequently and yet without superstition thereby to vouch it to others and even to themselves that they own'd JESUS Christ crucified for their Lord and Saviour as also it was made upon our fore-heads in Holy Baptism in token that we should not be ashamed to profess the faith of Christ crucified Caro signatur ut anima muniatur Tert. and manfully to fight under his banner against sin the world and the devil c. And to the same purpose we may use it on our selves again to testifie that we own the profession we then made and tacitely to confirm and renew our vows of obedience and fidelity not to conjure away spirits and work such feats as many intend it for in the Church of Rome but to strengthen our good resolutions by moving and affecting our hearts Certain it is that nothing palpable or visible may in this life be the object of our worship it may have some power on the heart as well as what comes in by the ear but though it have the warrant of antiquity yet it may not serve any
further than only to stir up our dull affections and raise holy passions in us But if we sincerely forsake our sins and evidence our love to JESUS 't is not greatly material what means or instruments we use §. 28. Meditation on the passion My love is crucified said that loving and holy Martyr Ignatius declaring how earnestly he wish't to die for JESUS 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 and so considering the passion of JESUS I meditate with him My love is crucified my dearest Saviour dies in most bitter pains he hath been rudely bound and drag'd from place to place he hath been stript tied to a post and whipt like a vile slave he hath been buffetted and caned and abus'd with all manner of contumelies and now I see him crown'd with thorns all over spittle and blood I see him stretch'd upon the cross where his hands and his feet are nail'd his head hangs down I read in his pale face and his weeping eyes the extremity of his pain the anguish of his wounded soul Lord art thou he whom my soul loveth O Domine Jesu Christe si intelligentia quam mihi dedisti uti vellem sicut deberem cernerem manifeste quo modo imo quam sine modo à me creatura tua amari merueris qui prior dilexisti me tantus tantum gratis tantillum talem ingratum Idiot art thou my dearest JESUS were it my father my brother my friend or my benefactor that should suffer this undeservedly how would I pitty them but should they suffer this upon my account Lord I could not outlive such a sight if nothing else love would certainly wound my soul to death But behold it is so this crucified this dying man is my father he gave me my being he is my brother he came down from heaven and took humane flesh that he might have that relation to me he is my friend he lays down his life to save mine he is my greatest benefactor from him I receive all I have all the blessings the good things I injoy I owe to his kindness But heark methinks I hear him speak to me these pathetick these moving words Christian dearest Christian for whom here I die consider seriously imprint it in thine heart what in my words what in my mysteries thou readest of my suffering for thee consider who I am what I indure and to what end I am the eternal Son of God whom the Angels adore I became Man to make thee partaker of the Divine Nature I am infinitely rich the whole universe is mine I became thus destitute of all things to purchase true riches for thee I am of an Almighty Power the whole world was made and subsists by me I am now weak to make thee strong I am overcome of mine enemies to make thee conquer thine I am crown'd with glory and cloth'd with Majesty I now wear these thorns and am become naked to clothe thee with robes of righteousness and Crown thee with a Royal Diadem I am the inexhaustible fountain of joy and happiness I now indure sorrows and miseries to make thee joyful and happy I am infinitely pure and innocent I am become a sacrifice for sin to merit thy pardon and to sanctifie and make thee holy I am the Author of life the first and the last I now die to make thee live for ever nothing but love moves me thus to suffer for thee This us'd to be written under Crucifixes Aspice serve Dei sic me posuere Judaei Aspice mortalis pro te datur hostia talis Aspice devote quoniam sic pendeo pro te Introitum vitae reddo tibi redde mihi te In cruce sum pro te qui peceas desine pro me Desine do veniam dic culpam corrige vitam and nothing but love I require for it Dearest soul thy sins are more grievous to me than my wounds add not sorrow to my sorrow by remaining impenitent deny not this request to thy dying bleeding Saviour that thou wouldst mortifie thy lusts and forsake thy sins all that is past I heartily forgive if thou becomest true penitent I freely give my self for thee and beg that thou wouldst give thy self to me §. 29. Protestations of love to JESUS What shall I say now dearest Lord Words cannot answer thee I am amaz'd I am astonished I know not how to speak my tongue cannot express what my heart feels Lord I will say nothing I will answer with sighs and tears with devout affections by resigning and giving up my body and soul to thee I will answer by obedience by actions by now falling to work to reform my life to mortifie my sinful lusts to cut off the members of the body of sin Sweetest JESU I will love thee with all the affections my heart can entertain no bosome sin shall be so dear to me but for thy sake I will heartily part with it no lust shall be so pleasing but I will kill it at thy request and command even my natural desires and inclinations will I gladly deny when they come in competition with that duty and love I owe and ever will pay JESUS sect 30. Of a sincere amendment But fickle and unhappy creatures that we are we often promise well but seldome stand to our ingagements our resolutions are good and our performances very defective The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak I must not therefore rest in generals but I must resolve more especially against those sins I am inclined to and not only against them but also upon the means whereby I may overcome and mortifie them as avoiding the occasions and inticements inflicting on my self such severities as may be proper remedies and tying my self to such pious exercises as I know will drive away the temptation To forsake my sins is not to forbear drunkenness when perhaps I am not inclined to it or to avoid swearing when I look upon it as an unpleasing and unprofitable sin or to hate covetousness when by nature I am liberal but knowing what sin pleaseth me most what vice my temper inclines me to and what temptation is most strong and importunate upon me by my calling or my company against that to fortifie my self and imploy the utmost of my strength against that to watch and pray and use sincere and earnest indeavours To forsake my sins is not to say I will forsake them Some men when they are call'd upon by fear adversity or the secret voice of God within them are forward enough to ingage with the Elder Brother in the Gospel Lord I will go and work in thy vineyard but their hot zeal and hasty promise soon decays into negligence and at last into a cold denial Though I resolve against my natural corruptions never so seriously that will not subdue them without I use proper means for it to take up my cross and follow Christ to forsake all for him to deny my self to take the kingdom of heaven by force