the rest of the Chapter all those places the Lord often made a stay unto my soul And afterwards the Lord so blessed one means or other unto me insomuch as I was kept from sinking and falling into such horrour as many of the people of God sometimes fell into But yet my fears and doubts were so many as that my comfort never lasted long If the Lord did but hide his face I was troubled No longer could I beleeve then I found new strength given in that the Lord would ever have mercy upon my soul. The sense of Original sin and Actual transgressions in their filthiness and guiltiness caused my fears yet to remain upon my spirit my faith then seemed very small if I had any which I much questioned I durst not then say Lord encrease my faith but I could cry earnestly Lord work faith in me I found much dulness and deadness manifold distractions in duties so that God might justly have withdrawn himself from me for ever yet notwithstanding all my uneven walking with God he was graciously pleased to manifest his mercy unto my soul. When I was stricken with such weaknesses as I apprehended might quickly have ended my life I fell into a great fear At the first finding my heart to sink the Lord was pleased to gâ—ive me so much respite as to pour out my soul before him desiring strength and support from him to keep up my spirit and to make me willing to submit to his dispensations and the Lord graciously answered my prayers in that he removed all my former doubtings and fears all the time of that sickness which was long and so dangerous that neither I nor others expected my life The Lord then cleared up my evidences for Heaven and gave me in so much comfort against the apprehension of death as I never had in all my life before Other like trials of the Lords love I found still when I was in the greatest extremity and stood most in need of help from him insomuch as at such times I have hoped that I should never again have questioned the love of God to my soul But I have found it otherwise by sad experience For when these impressions were worn of I have been ready to call all in question again concerning my poor soul. It made me oft to think of that which was laid to Solomons charge that he forgat the Lord that had appeared to him twice I found it the hardest thing to believe that ever I went about But this wavering condition could not satisfie my soul for the Lord giving me sometimes a glimpse of his love made me long after fuller enjoyments of it so that I was carried out with a restless impatience to beg that the Lord would take away the heart of unbelief from me which did both dishonour him and hinder me from that peace which the Lord was willing that his people should enjoy My heart then being brought unto that frame I was more willing than ever I was before to impart my condition unto some spiritual Friends whom I desired to deal impartially with me acquainting them with the whole condition of my soul how far the Lord had carried me on and at what I stuck and still as new objections did arise I laboured to get satisfaction Being convinced that I had too much prejudiced my self in that I had not sooner made my condition known to some who were able to give me advice This way of communicating my condition I found the Lord blessed unto my soul insomuch that my hopes were more confirmed my fears more removed my faith more strengthned and by the hearing of such Sermons and reading such Books as came closest unto the conscience and were most for trial of ones spiritual condition I found the greatest benefit by and received the most comfort from them Formerly I had many fears that I was not one of them who had an interest in the Election of Grace But the Lord afterwards put into my heart to enquire whether I had those Graces of his Spirit wrought in me which none but his own elect people could have Upon the strictest searching into mine own heart the Lord was pleased after many years of fear at last to evidence unto my soul that there was a change wrought in my heart will and affections notwithstanding the remainders of sin and corruption which still encompassed me about being confident that he that had begun this good work would not leave it unfinished unto the day of Jesus Christ and the Lord was pleased to set home divers Promises for the strengthning of my faith to wit those which set down the Everlasting Covenant 2 Sam. 23. 5. The Everlasting love of God Jer. 31. 3. Joh. 11. 13. The certainty of the Foundation 2 Tim. 2. 19. The certainty of the Promises 2 Cor. 1. 20. They are all in Christ Yea and Amen and that the children of God have eternal life promised unto them and that none shall be ever able to pluck them out of Christs hands Joh. 10. 28. Then for divers years the Lord was pleased to stay me to lead and guide me till he had set my feet upon that Rock which is higher than I from whence I trust that I shall never be removed And now my hearts desire is to ascribe that measure of hope and comfort which the Lord hath given me at any time onely unto the praise of the glory of his Grace who hath made me accepted in his Beloved which is so great a mercy as I can never be thankfull enough for nor walk answerable thereunto I know when I look into my heart there is matter of fear that the Lord will withdraw the influences of his comforts from me But that which I rest upon is the free mercy of God in Christ expecting performance of his Promises made Rom. 6. 16. Sin shall not have dominion over you because you are not under the Law but under Grace And Ezek. 36. 25. that he will sprinkle clean water upon me and that he will give me a new heart and put a new spirit within me that he will take away my stony heart and give me an heart of flesh being perswaded that the Lord will keep me by his own Power through faith unto salvation And now that I may have all the Graces of the Spirit strengthened and encreased in me which I finde that I stand in continual need of It is the desire of my soul to be a partaker of the Lords Supper which through the blood of Christ onely I have right unto This is the particular account of Gods gracious dealing with this godly Gentlewoman considering there was no administration of the Sacrament in that Parochial Congregation where she lived and used formerly to receive it nor any Pastor at all to officiate there she being desirous to enjoy that great Ordinance and that after a pure way of administration sent this aforementioned Narrative
discouragement which he called The childe of pride and unbelief He used to say that some duties which were oft in mens mouthes he found very difficult to him As 1. To deny himself in all his Selfs was a work to be learning whilst he lived 2. To live onely by faith and a bare promise without a pawn is a great work 3. To give all to free Grace and to Christ alone is a mighty work 4. To love where we meet with unlovingness and contempt is no easie matter 5. To do ones proper work without some present pay and countenance from God and man is a hard task 6. That it s far harder to adopt others comforts than their sorrows and to hold ones self exalted in anothers exaltation 7. That to dye in cold blood and to be active in it as an act of obedience is the work of a Christian. In his sickness he would occasionally vent himself thus It s a hard thing to think ill of our selves and well of God at the same time It s a hard thing for a Saint to forgive himself some faults when God hath forgiven them It s hard to think holy thoughts long and to confine them to anothers prayers We know but little of Christs love till all be perfected and spread before us in heaven For his children he referred them to an old Will which he had made Anno Christi 1636 when they were many and small which because it may be of use to many others it s here inserted The Advice and Counsel of Dr. Harris to his Family annexed to a Will made by him Anno Christi 1636. To my dear Wife and Children My dear Selfs I know not what leasure I shall have to speak unto you at my Death and I am not you know very free in speech especially in sickness and sadness and therefore now I will speak my heart to you and I would have you to hear me speaking whilst you live in this my writing which I divide amongst you all First for you my dear Wife you shall finde the substance of that I would say to you printed to your hand in the Book of Martyrs Vol. 2. p. 1744 to wit in John Careless his Letter to his Wife keep the Book and often read the Letter onely one thing I adde if you marry again remember your own observation viz. That second Husbands are very uxorious second Wives very prevalent and therefore take heed that you do no ill office in estranging your Husband from his natural children or kindred you shall thereby draw upon him a great sin and judgement if you kill in him natural affections I have said and do with all the strength and power that is in me thank you for your faithfulness and resign you to the Husband of Husbands the Lord Christ. Now my poor Children let me pour out my heart to you and speak to your Souls first For your Souls Trifle not in the main point the Soul is immortal you have to deal with an infinite Majesty you go upon life and death therefore here be serious do all to God in a serious manner When you think of him speak of him pray to him any way make your addresses to his great Majesty be in good earnest and have God and have all 1. More particularly get your pardon in Christ It is not impossible to get it assured to you if you will learn 1. To deny your selves 2. To live by faith 3. To understand the nature of the New Covenant Settle your judgements in these Points and the thing is feasible 2. Having gotten it be still adding to your evidence and enjoy your present Assurance Do all to God as to your Father Next to this think how you and I shall endure the sight the thought one of another at the last day if you appear in the old Adam much less shall you stand before Christ unless you shew the Image of Christ in you and therefore never cease till you be made New creatures and study well what that is In the last place strive for those Graces most which concern your places and conditions and make head against those sins which most threaten you As first Hereditary sins I was naturally Melancholy that is a humour that admits of any temptation and is capable of any impression and distemper Shun as death this humour which will work you to all unthankfulness against God unlovingness to man and unnaturalness to your selves 2. Of your times and habitations 3. Of your tempers and age 4. Of your Callings I have made my own peace my sins shall not hurt you if you make them not yours you need not fear the success if you will oppose to sin Christ is made sanctification to you he came to dissolve the works of Satan he hath overcome for you and hath made as many promises for your sanctification as your justification Gather those promises as they be set down especially in the Covenant with an oath Luke 1. Press these to God 2 Cor. 7. 1. In short do not talk and make a noise to get a name of forward men but do the thing be constant in secret duties and act Religion in your Câ—llings for it is not a name or notion It is a frame of nature and habit of living by Divine Rule What it is you will then know when you have it in truth first and in power next and not before Onely this for the present It is that you must live and dye by that you must rise and reign by therefore my Châ—ldren I give you that advice which I gave your Brother now with God Be more than you seem Do more than you talk of in point of Religion Satisfie your own consciences in what you do all men you shall never satisfie nay some will not be satisfied though they be convinced For your Bodies I was troubled with straightness of breath and breast which was also Hereditary and therefore you must fear it the more The Remedies are 1. Disclaim Hereditary sins 2. Keep Heads clean Feet warm and Hearts cheerful 3. Be more frequent than I and your Brother in exercise 4. Shun late drinking or studying 5. Use lighter Suppers For your Callings 1. Choose well 1. A profitable Calling for the publick 2. A full imployment 3. A Calling fit for your parts and means It is better to be a rich Cobler than a poor Merchant 2. Use a Calling well 1. Make it an help not a snare to your souls 2. Be 1. Diligent 2. Skilful Any honest Calling will honour you if thus you honour it and therefore you may be hopeful because my self who had not your parts and helps never fouâ—d any thing too hard for me in my Calling but discouragement and unbelief For your Company Abandon all infectious flattering self-serving companions when oncâ— you have found them false trust them no more Sort with such as are able to do oâ— receive good Solomon gives you the best counsel for this in
Pastor which suffered much extremity by reason of the persecution of their then prevailing adversaries forcing them from Bermudas into the Desart Continent The sound of whose distress was no sooner heard of but you might have heard the sounding of his bowels with many others applying themselves to a speedy Collection and sending it to them on purpose for their seasonable relief the sum was about seven hundred pounds two hundred whereof he gathered in the Church of Boston no man in the Contribution exceeding and but one equalling his bounty And it was remarkable that this Contribution arrived there the very day after those poor people were brought to a personal division of that little Meal then remaining in the Barrel and not seeing according to man but that after the eating thereof they must dye a lingring death for want of food and upon the same day their Pastor had preached unto them it being the Lords day upon that Text Psal. 23. The Lord is my Shepherd I shall not want At such a time the good hand of the Lord brought this succour to them from afar Whilst he was in Old England his eminent piety the success of his labours and his interest in the hearts both of superiours inferiours equals drew upon him much envy and his Non-conformity added thereunto so that he was delivered in a great measure to the will of his Adversaries who gave him not over till they had bereaved him of much of his livelihood his liberty Country and therewithall of the sweet society of lovers friends and many wayes endeared acquaintance more precious to him than life it self Yet the measure of the afflictions of Christ appointed to be suffered by him was not so fulfilled but lo in the time of his exile some Brethren provoked by the censure of Authority though justly not without tears inflicted upon them singled out Mr. Cotton as the object of their displeasure who though above other men declining irregular and unnecessary interesting himself in the actions of the Magistrate and while opportunity lasted endeavouring their healing yet they requited him evil for good and they at least some of them who were formerly companions with him in the tribulations of that Patmos yea respecters of him had taken sweet counsel together and they had walked in the house of God as friends Hence was he with Tongue and pen blasphemed by them for whom he formerly intreated and for whom he both then and afterwards wept and put on sackcloth As touching any Tenet wherein he may seem singular remember that he was a man and therefore to be heard and read with judgement and happily sometimes with favour St. Hierom makes a difference between reading the writings of the Apostles and other men They saith he alwayes speak the truth these as men sometimes erre But no man did more placidly bear a Dissentient than he It contributes much towards the fuller discovery of truth when men of larger capacities and greater industry than others may be permitted to communicate their Notions onely they should use this liberty by way of disquisition not of Position rather as searchers after Scripture-light than as Dictators of private opinions But now this Western Sun hastens to his setting Being called to preach at a neighbour Church he took wet in his passage over the Ferry and not many hours after he felt the effect of it being seized upon with an extream ilness in his Sermon time This sad providence when others bewailed he comforted himself in that he was found so doing Decet Imperatorem stantem mori It is the honour of a Commander to dye standing St. Austins usual with was that when Christ came he might finde him Aut praecantem aut praedicantem either praying or preaching Calvin would not that when the Lord came he should finde him idle After a short time he complained of the inflamation of his lungs and thereupon found himself Asthmatical and afterward Scorbutical which both meeting in a complicated disease put an end to his dayes insomuch that he was forced to give over those comforting drinks which his stomack could not want If he still used them the inflamation grew unsufferable and threatned a more sharp and speedy death If he left them his stomack forthwith ceased to perform its office leaving him without hope of life By these Messengers he received the sentence of death yet in the use of means he attended the pleasure of him in whose hands our times are his labours continued whilst his strength failed November the 18. he took in course for his Text the four last verses of the second Epistle to Timothy Salute Prisca and Aquila c. Giving the reason why he spake of so many verses together because otherwise he said he should not live to make an end of that Epistle He chiefly insisted upon those words Grace be with you all so ending that Epistle and his Lectures together For upon the Lords day following he preached his last Sermon upon Joh. 1. 14. And the Word was made Flesh and dwelt among us and we â—eheld his Glory as of the onely begotten Son of the Father full of Grace and Peace Now he gave himself wholly to prepare for his dissolution making his Will and setting his house in order When he could no more be seen abroad all sorts Magistrates Ministers Neighbours and Friends afar off and those near at hand especially his own people resorted to him daily as to a publick Father When the neighbour Ministers visited him in which duty they were frequent he thanked them affectionately for their love exhorting them also as an Elder and a witness of the sufferings of Christ to feed the Flock encouraging them that when the chief Shepherd shall appear they should receive a Crown of Glory that fadeth not away Finding himself to grow weak according to that of James he sent for the Elders of the Church of Boston to pray over him which last solemn duty being performed not without much affection and many tears Then as Polycarp a little before his death said That he had served Christ fourscore and six years neither had he ever offended him in any thing so he told them through Grace he had now served God forty years it being so long since his conversion throughout which time he had ever found him faithful to him and thereupon he took occasion to exhort them to the like effect that Paul sometime did the Elders of Ephesus a little before they were to see his face no more Take heed therefore to your selves and to all the Flock over wâ—ich the Lord hath made you overseers to feed the Church of God which he hath purchased with his own blood Particularly he lamented that the love of many yea and some of their own Congregation was grown cold towards the publick Ordinances calling upon them so much the more for their watchfulness in that respect which done he thanked them for their loving and brotherly assistance to
blood which extinguisheth the fire of thine anger O that it might allay my burning pains I am in a fiery Furnace Lord be with me as thou wast with the tâ—ree Children and bring me out refined from sin when I have sailed through the Ocean of these pains and look back I see that none of them can be wanting I flye unto thee O God hide me under the shadow of thy wings till these terrible storms be overpast 5. God added Humility as a Crown to all his other Graces which yet shone bright in the eyes of all that were acquainted with him Indeed he was cloathed with Humility And hence it was that he would converse so familiarly with the poorest Christians and with them who were of the lowest parts for knowledge even with babes in Christ. This his ordinary expression of himself before God did clearly demonstrate his great humility Poor worm Sinful wretch O pardon my transgressions for they are very great Hereupon he would weep much when he was told how much he was prayed for wondring at Gods goodness that so sinful a wretch and worthless a creature should have so much interest in the hearts and prayers of the people of God And his language in his Will speaks how little he was in his own eyes the words are these I desire that at my Funeral there may be no pomp but that so poor a worthless wretch may be privately laid in the ground And as his Graces were many so were his Comforts many and great which God vouchsafed as singular manifestations of his love to this his dear Servant and Childe O what Kisses of Christs Mouth and what imbraces from the Arms of his Love were bestowed upon this Saint of the most High He enjoyed all along his afflicted condition an uninterrupted assurance of Gods Fatherly love in Christ. In his addresses unto God he constantly claimed propriety in God calling him my God and my Father His inward peace and joy were the support of his heart under all his grievous and grinding pains he was confident of mercies mixtures with all his greatest distempers not at all doubting of the sanctification of them to him through Grace Thus he spake many times in his applications unto God Consider and save me for I am thine How long how long Lord shall I not be remembred yea I am remembred blessed be thy Name This is a fiery Chariot but it will carry me to Heaven Blessed be God that hath supported me hitherto and he that hath delivered will yet deliver Thou Lord never forgettest them that put their trust in thee Alwayes when the extremity of pain was over he would with smiles speak of Gods mercies Though trembling took hold upon him when his violent pains began yet would he with confidence say Now in the strength of the mighty God I will undergo these pains O my God put under thine everlasting Arms and strengthen me Many times he told a bosome friend of his that notwithstanding all his rentings and roarings from which he expected no deliverance but by death he would not for a thousand worlds change estates with the greatest man on earth whom he looked upon as in a way of sin and enthraled thereto And this much bespeaks Gods Fatherly indulgence towards him that Satan could never shake his confidence nor assault his hopes all the time of his irksome irksome distemper And this was further very remarkable that he counted all these inward cheerings the fruits of Prayers that were made for him though God saw cause to deny that ease and recovery to his body which was so much begged and withall he valued those spiritual cordials and refreshings far beyond deliverance from the Gout and the Stone yea and Death it self These things are the rather mentioned to prevent that discouragement or offence which some may be too apt to take at the violence and continuance of his wasting and tormenting pains notwithstanding his own godliness and the uncessant prayers both ordinary and extraordinary which were made unto God in his behalf for he found the sweet fruits of them in his own bosome even when he felt the continuance and increase of his bodily grief Another thing very remarkable in holy Mr. Whitaker was his love to his fellow Christians he was a man made up as it were of love His delight was in the Saints upon earth whom he esteemed most excellent and their society was a constant cordial to his spirit His frequent visits of them that were in trouble and his stirring up of others to the like practice were testimonies of this his cordial love which indeed was not verbal but real He was also abundant in works of charity few men of his estate did equalize him therein He would often say It is a brave thing when a man together with a full estate hath a charitable heart Sometimes upon special occasions he hath given away all the money that he had in the house It was not unusual with him to give twenty shillings to a poor Saint and he had many experiencences of Gods gracious returns in such cases By his last Will he gave twenty pounds to the godly poor of his own Parish There were two Cases wherein his loves were most enlarged to the people of God whereof you may take these two Instances The one when the sufferings were publick He often told an intimate friend of his that Englands late breach with Scotland and the blood that was shed together with other sad consequences thereof had taken such impression upon his heart that the sorrow would never be removed till his death and the sufferings both in Holland and in England in our late Sea-sights were an heavy burden upon his spirit The other Case was in respect to the inward perplexity of such as were afflicted in minde having moved a special friend of his the week before his death to bestow a visit upon one in that condition the very morning before his death when speech was grievous to him in respect of his great weakness he asked him whether he had remembred the party that was troubled in spirit which was a remarkable evidence of his strong love to such And besides what hath already been mentioned I might here set down his many wrestlings with God to prevent the flood or troubles which he apprehended the Protestant Churches were now in danger to be overflowed withall as also his compassionate respect to Congregations in the Country which were like sheep wandring upon the barren mountains without a Shepherd And as his love sâ—owed forth to the Saints so was theirs no less towards him Not to speak of the many frequent and friendly visits of godly men and women in the Neighbourhood round about him there was scarce ever heard of any man that was so much prayed for both in publick and in private both upon ordinary and extraordinary occasions as he was There was no particular case so frequently so
unto me and in particular that he hath kept Satan from me in this my weakness Oh how good is God entertain good thoughts of him How ever it be with us we cannot think too well of him or too bad of our selves And this sense of Gods goodness was very deeply imprinted upon his heart to his very last and therefore in all his Wills this Legacy was alwayes renewed Item I bequeathe to all my children and to their childrens children to each of them a Bible with this Inscription None but Christ. Being upon a time visited by two Reverend Doctors his choice Friends who before they prayed with him desired him to tell them what he chiefly requested He answered I praise God he supports me and keeps off Satan beg that I may hold out I am now in a good way home even quite spent I am now at the shore I leave you tossing on the Sea Oh it is a good time to dye in Yet when his end approached nearer being often asked how he did He answered In no great pain I praise God onely weary of my unuseful life If God hath no more service for me to do here I could be gladly in Heaven where I shall serve him better freed from sin and distractions I pass from one death to another yet I fear none I praise God I can live and I dare dye If God hath more work for me to do here I am willing to do it though my infirm body be very weary Desiring one to pray with him and for him that God would hasten the work it was asked whether pain c. put him upon that desire He answered No but I now do no good and I hinder others which might be better imployed if I were not Why should any desire to live but to do God service Now I cease from that I do not live By this time the violence of his distempers disabled him and the advice of his Physitians was that he should forbear speech yet he called upon those which attended him to read some part of the Scriptures to him constantly especially he put one of his Sons that was with him to pray frequently and whilst his life and speech lasted he used to conclude all the Prayers with a loud Amen The nearer he approached to his end the more he slumbered Once when he awoke he found himself very ill whereupon calling for his Son he took him by the hand and said Pray with me it is the last time in likelihood that I shall ever joyn with you and complaining to him of his wearisomeness his Son answered There remains a rest To whom he replied My Sabbath is not far off and yours is at hand ere that I shall be rid of all my trouble and you will be eased of some At length his ruinous house which onely inobedience to the will of God had held out beyond his own desires and all mens expectations from the heighth of Summer till the depth of Winter comes to be dissolved About Saturday in the even he began to set himself to dye forbidding all cordials to be administred upon what extremity soever and gave his dying blessing to his Son who onely of all his children was present with him and upon his request enjoyned him to signifie when he had opportunity to that Country where he had lived longest that he lived and dyed in that Faith which he had preached and printed the comfort whereof he now found Something else he began to speak but his distempers interrupted his purpose and from that time he never entertained any discourse with man onely he commanded the eight Chapter of the Epistle to the Romans to be read to him And herein God was exceeding good to him in the return of those Petitions which had been put up for him that afternoon by those two eminent Divines and his dearest Brethren before mentioned For whereas his great distempers gave occasion to fear his death would be exceeding painful yet did it prove so easie that his Son and other attendants could but guess at the particular time of his departure His breathings were easie and even his eyes open and full of water till at the last having lifted them up towards Heaven they closed of themselves and his soul without the least motion of resistance of the body entred into everlasting rest whilst those whom he left behinde were entring upon the day of their rest For then began he a perpetual Sabbath in Heaven when they began theirs on earth betwixt twelve and one on Saturday night December 11. Anno Christi 1658. He dyed in a good old age and full of dayes having overlived fourscore years His loss was much bewayled by the College by the City and whole University of Oxford He was as all that knew him confessed a man of admirable prudence profound judgement eminent gifts and graces and furnished with all qualifications that might render him a compleat man a wise Governour a profitable Preacher and a good Christian. First look upon him as a Christian for that was his and is every mans greatest Ornament He was a man that had much acquaintance with God much communion with him in private meditation and prayer accounting those his best dayes wherein he enjoyed most converse with him In the time of his sickness one asking him how he did oh saith he this hath been a sweet day I have had sweet communion with God in Jesus Christ. He was not like them who are all for promises and priviledges though in the mean time they neglect duties He made them his exercise but not his Christ He was much in those severe parts of Religion as private Humiliation Mortification and Self-denial whereby he gained the conquest over himself The truth is he was as far as is consistent with humane frailty Master of his corruptions passions reason appetite language and all The Lord was pleased to work upon him in the Primrose of his life though he certainly knew not either the Preacher or Sermon whereby he was converted His course was in the dayes of his strictest examination to set down in writing his evidences for Heaven sometimes in Propositions from Scripture other sometimes in Sylogismes and these he often subscribed to in a Book that he kept for that very purpose But these evidences were best read by others in the course of his life by his exact walking with God in piety charity humility patience and dependance upon him He was far unlike to those who sit in Moses Chair and teach what themselves practise not He had well digested that Fathers precept to Preachers Either preach not at all or live as you preach His life was a Commentary upon his Doctrine and his practice the Counterpane of his Sermons What was said of that precious Bishop Jewel was true of him That he adorned a heavenly Doctrine with a heavenly life In a word he did vertere verba in opera he lived Religion whilst many onely make
it the subject of their discourse He was much more than he seemed to be not loving to make a noise in the world but accounting it better to do than to speak In his works of charity to the poor he was no less discreet than private When he met with fit objects his hand was more ready to give than his tongue to proclaim it Indeed he was no friend to idle lazy canting persons who live on the sweat of other mens brows These he looked upon as the Pests of the Commonwealth nor could he think it charity to relieve such to the prejudice of the publick and to their own destruction But Gods poor and the Houshold of Faith lay neer his heart Whosoever shall survey his large Bills of weekly and quarterly allowances besides considerable summes given to poor Ministers and especialiy to their Widows and Orphans who never knew whence it came and shall adde thereunto his Legacies bequeathed in his Will to charitable uses cannot what ever others thought of him but judge that his charity exceeded the ordinary proportion of his revenues Naturally he was of a stout and masculine temper yet through Grace he attained to a great measure of humility He was mean and low in his own eyes and had more undervaluing thoughts of himself than all the world besides had of him He was very sensible of that enemy which he often complained of viz. Discouragement which he used to stile The childe of Pride and Unbelief It must needs be acknowledged a great measure of humility that could keep a man lowly under such abilities attainments and such general applauses as he met with in every place His usual saying was that he valued no man for his gifts but for his humility under them Neither should he expect much from any man were his parts never so great till he was broken with Afflictions and Temptations It was his observation that the humblest Preachers converted most souls not the choisest Schollars wâ—ilst unbroken He would sometimes use this speech which though a seeming contradiction yet hath it much truth in it It is better to be an humble Devil than a proud Angel He never affected popular applause variety of Pulpits Printing c. as one conscious to himself of I know not what unworthiness neither ever came he thus abroad but when by importunity he was haled to it 2. Consider him as a man in his Morals whether in the Government of himself in particular or of his Family or his greater trusts and in all you shall finde him like himself excellent and almost without a parallel In regard of himself he was exactly temperate confining himself to hours for diet sleep c. He would often say That he would rather pour liquor into his Boots than into his mouth between meals He was a strict observer of those Laws of Sobriety which St. Paul had pressed upon Ministers and which himself in his Drunkards Cup had taught others He used to eat seasonably and sparingly which without question was one great means of preserving such vigorous spirits to so great an age His onely play time was Saturdayes in the afternoon then he used to unbend and disburden himself by some innocent Recreations but onely ad Ruborem He was a man of an excellent deportment and sweet behaviour whereby he won much upon all with whom he conversed Grave he was without affectation pleasant without levity Indeed he never loved to hear himself talk and therefore by some was judged too reserved but when he knew with whom he had to do he was communicative enough No man was more candid or fuller of civility none more open or free to entertain or return discourses He was very cautious before he struck a league of intimate friendship with any man but when he had once chosen he was cordial firm and constant his head hand tongue pen feet purse all were now no longer his own but his friends It is said of the French that whatsoever cloaths they wear whatsoever Garb they accost you in becomes them so well as if nothing else did and a great Critick in men as well as in Books used to say of our doctor that whatsoever he did or spake became him It was a rare thing to see him angry If at any time the folly of others had discomposed him or their sin had provoked him yet could he quickly command himself and convert his passion into wholesome instruction Though himself had great parts both natural and acquired yet would he never sleight or undervalue much less contemn or discourage any whom he judged to be right in the main He was very sparing in his censures of others gentle to all and severe onely to himself He had a special gift of forgetting injuries but would offer none His memory was never more faithfull than in retaining civilities received to which he would industriously make what proportionable returns lay in his power He much feared lest he should give any occasion of suspicion that he either forgot or neglected any because he could not readily recall mens names which occasioned him to say That if he lived long he should forget his own name with him in Valerius At meals his manner was to be sociable and facetious yet still he took occasion to enquire of the Publick and how it feared with particular Towns and Families whence he would alwayes extract something for matter of Prayer or Prayer or Praise in his Thanksgiving after meat In his Family he had that qualification of a good Bishop mentioned by the Apostle that ruled well his own house He had an excellent method in the education of his Children which was this In general his care was to maintain his authority over them yet even that authority was equally tempered with lenity and gravity He loved them without fondness and ruled them without rigour In particular so soon as they could use their tongues they were made acquainted with the Historical part of the Scriptures As soon as they could use their legs they were set to School and when they could remember any thing of a Chapter read or bring home any part of a Sermon his care was to instruct them in the Fundamentals of Religion Their childehood being past he would call upon them for the practice of Religion and was a diligent observer of their private performance of Religious exercises wherein their Mother was no small help to him When they grew up to more maturity he diligently observed their capacities inclinations but especially their constitutions when he could guess at that sin which was like to prove their dilectum delictum their darling corruption he accordingly suited their Callings so as that sin might be least nourished and most beaten down The rule which he gave them was this When you are youths chuse your Callings when men chuse your wives only take me along with you It may be old men may see further than you
Thus whilst he condescended to them and they submitted to him both parties were gratified Though he had a numerous issue yet through Gods blessing upon his estate he disposed of them to no mean imployments Many he sent to the Universities some to Merchandise c. To his Sons whom he bred in the University his Rule was Study work more than wages To those whom he bred in the City he would say Do not waste a halfpenny and you will not want a penny And truly so well did they all improve as his advice so their own time and parts that they became Masters of their particular Callings which ministred unto him no small comfort He acknowledged it a great mercy to his dying day that none of his children were blemished either in their bodies or in their reputations He was one of them in whose children that Popish slander concerning the ungraciousness of the children of the married Clergy received a real confutation Many of his Sons he buried in their prime some at home others in forreign parts and some dyed shortly after himself yet all of them gave comfortable hopes to conclude upon a rational charity both by the pious Letters of those which dyed abroad and from that particular account which they gave of themselves who dyed at home that they all meet in Heaven they which survive need not this attestation Amongst the dead there was Mr. Tho. Harris of Magdalen College in Oxford who was eminently learned beyond his age an Ornament to that Noble Foundation whereof he was a member once the joy of his friends and still their sorrow and probably this arrow from Gods hand stuck deep in the Fathers heart to his dying day For his servants there are some yet living that served him in his younger dayes who still bless God that ever they came under his roof where they received the beginnings of Grace and such a measure of knowledge as kept them from warping in the late giddy times Whilst he remained with his antient Flock his constant manner was to keep a Religious Fast before his administration of the Sacrament of the Lords Supper And after he came to his small College he so prudently managed all his affairs that he was both feared and loved Indeed his government there was such as caused a wonder For whereas that College before was famous for factions during his time there was never any complaint made to any Visitors and no marvel for the Foundation there honoured him as a Father and he looked upon and loved them as his Children and accordingly he scaled up his love to them in his last Will and Testament He called Gifts Bribery and hated the very shadow of it Examples are known in the College of Gratuities refused long after faire and free Elections But look upon him as a Schollar and there we have him in his proper Element Though he left the University early and preached constantly yet being of a retired disposition a constant student and endowed with great parts he became Master of all manner of Learning to qualifie a Divine In the sacred Languages especially in the Hebrew he was very exact His Conciones ad Clerum declare him to have been a pure and Polite Latinist His first which was preached and printed long since hath undergone the test and gained the approbation of all knowing men in that Language the younger by full forty years is of as good a complexion and of as vigorous a constitution as its elder brother and it s hoped that in due time it may be made as publick What his abilities in Disputation were hath upon several occasions been made to appear in that College Exercises in the Chappel where oft-times in the unexpected absence of the Opponents himself would ex tempore take up the Cudgels and make good their ground In which Exercises he approved himself a subtle clear and ready Disputant without any grains of allowance either for his age or discontinuance Indeed his chiefest Learning lay where he made least shew of it in publick viz. in Chronology Church-History Councils Case-Divinity and his insight into the Fathers But his parts were best seen in the pulpit His gifts in Prayer were much more than ordinary wherein his affections were warm and fervent his Petitions pithy and substantial his language pertinent unaffected and without Tautologies Oh how would he raise up a dull and sinking spirit How would he warm a cold and frozen heart How would he carry a man out of himself and by degrees mount the soul heaven-ward His Sermons in Print are well known to the world and his works praise him in the Gates The particular excellencies of Nazianzen Basil Chrysostome Austin Ambrose Bernard seemed all to conâ—enter in him He taught Rhetorick to speak in our Mother-tongue and without falshood or flattery he may be stiled The English Orator His Doctrines carried light with them and his Uses heat His Reproofes were weighty and his Exhortations powerful But enough of this lest we hear as he did who spake much in commendation of Hercules Quis unquam vituperavit who ever dispraised him yea what either Christian or Schollar but approved or commended him If you would know the worth of his Sermons read them though read they come short of what they were when preached yea read them again and again and endeavour to read them with the same spirit they were preached and you cannot but acknowledge an excellency in them Amongst other his excellencies in preaching which were many these were not the least that he could so cook his meat that he could make it relish to every pallate He could dress a plain discourse so as that all sorts should be delighted with it He could preach with a learned plaineness and had learned to conceal his Art He had clear Notions of high Mysteries and proper language to make them stoop to the meanest capacity His way in contriving and penning his Sermons was this 1. He so contrived the parts of his Text and points of Doctrine as might afford him most scope in his Application wherein his and indeed a Sermons excellency doth consist and therefore he used to say That in a Sermon he contrived the Uses first He did often handle the same Texts and the same Points and yet still would pen new Applications which might be most suitable to the quallity and condition of the Auditory 2. In penning when he once began he would never take Pen from paper nor turn to any Book till he had written all All his younger dayes for about twenty years together he wroâ—ght all and could without much difficulty preach the same verbatim He was wont to say That he had a fluid and waterish memory I can said he quickly remember any thing of my own and as quickly fâ—rget it again Yet questionless his memory was vast and tenacious for though sometimes he had but short Notes in his Bible and that
36. that then every man shall be judged Jude 15. and every secret thing shall be brought to light Rom. 2. 16. and that the judgement will be most just and so confessed by all Rom. 2. 5 6. why then should I fear the last Judgement seeing he shall be my Judge who is my Brother Advocate and Redeemer He that was willingly judged for me will give no hard sentence against me yea he hath already absolved me from my sins and given me the earnest of his Spirit and the seal of the Sacraments and I have judged my self that I may not be condemned with the world 1 Cor. 11. 32. I do beleeve that the glory of Heaven is unspeakable and incomprehensible by us here on earth 1 Cor. 2. 9. that is it eternal Matth. 25. 45. and that it is the gift of God proceeding onely from his free Grace not our merit Luke 12. 32. his free gift bestowed onely upon the Elect Rev. 21. 27. O that I could by the effectualness of contemplation behold the greatness of this felicity which is provided for me yet as I can conceive it I cannot choose but long to be absent from hence that I may be present with the Lord 2 Cor. 5. 8. whos 's admirable beauty I shall clearly see and know as I am known and that with a perfection both of holiness and happiness such holiness as will not onely free me from all sin but from all possibility of sinning such happiness as that ceasing from all labour and sorrow I shall enjoy an eternal Sabbath and shall be free to all the treasures of Heaven and with the fruition of Gods glorious presence shall enjoy the sweet society of all the glorified Saints and Angels And all this as it is unuterable so it is unalterable For as I cannot be disappointed of it because it is certain so I cannot be deprived of it because it is eternal How then should the hope of the future life but swallow up the afflictions of the life present and why should I fear Death when being dead I shall be so blessed Yet was not her Faith elevated so high but that she could readily apply it to promises of an inferiour degree For as she trusted in God at all times as David teacheth Psal. 62. 8. so did she in all things whether temporal or eternal In straits and difficulties for the affairs of this life she had that ready at hand Commit thy way unto the Lord trust also in him and he shall bring it to pass Psal. 37. 5. If at any time she was sinisterly censured by any one her faith applied that promise to her heart He shall bring forth thy righteousness as the light and thy judgement as the noon day Psal. 35. 6. And whatsoever it were that came upon her as a cross her faith was either as a wreathe betwixt her shoulders and it that it did not pinch her or a remover of it from her self to him who was best able to bear it by vertue of that Warrant Psal. 55. 22. Cast thy burthen upon the Lord and he shall sustain thee and that done her faith which teacheth to keep an eaven pace with the promises not making haste Isa. 28. 16. by anticipating the time of accomplishment taught her soul to wait upon God as Davids did Psal. 62. 1. to effect his own work at his own time in his own way and manner wherein she would not prescribe any thing at all By this daily exercise of her Faith she gained a great deal of freedome and lightsomness of spirit which admirably appeared in her deportment upon great disappointments of that which was her own due and unexpected payments unto others when she hath seen no way of supply for the present occasions she hath believed that Gods providence would effect what her forecast could not when she was not wanting in the use of means and that he could furnish her with that which should be sufficient albeit for the present she saw not how nor by what means it would come to pass and therefore when she had done what belonged to her duty in the affiance of her Faith she rested quiet and remained cheerful and slept neither the less nor the worse for it and that which confirmed her confidence the more was that she still found by experience that God was most worthy to be trusted That her Faith was as good as it was great appeared by the effect of it in her Devotion and Piety which was suitable to her knowledge of God and her faith in him by both which as she had a clear apprehension of him so none had more dear and devout affections to him or more assured signs of such than she as appeared in these particulars She was frequently and fervently conversant with God besides the publick in her private supplications and therein was he most favourably familiar with her for he sent forth his Spirit into her heart whereby she cried Abba Father Gal 4. 6. The Spirit of Grace and Supplication Zach. 12. 10. which enabled her in an extraordinary manner and measure to pour out her soul into his bosome and though she duely esteemed of the solemn prayers of the sacred Assemblies whereof a learned and pious Divine said that never any one prayed well privately who contemned or neglected the publick prayers of the Church and never sleighted or censured set forms of Prayer yet could she and that excellently well conceive Prayer and vary her Petitions as the present occasion did require Yea in this Devotion she was so abundant in apt and pertinent expressions that indeed it was admirable that one so silent in her common conversation with the world should be so fluent and eloquent in her entercourse with God Nor was she more copious in speech than fervent in spirit For such was her holy violence in Prayer as that she seemed not to knock at Heaven Gate for another to open it but to make a battery upon it her self and to break in by the powerful importunity of her supplications Her service also of God in this kinde was no dry Devotion but steeped and drenched in showres of tears and though her prudence used as much privacy as might be herein yet such a singular gift could not be hid from her servants and some secret female friends who sometimes when they were sick or possessed with fears or pains of child-birth they would move her with importunity to pray with them and when she yeelded to them and God to her by answering her request they were apt as there was cause to impute the good effect to her fervent supplications A female friend of hers who was her bed-fellow in London for many weeks together and thereby was a partaker of her daily Devotions professed that she was so plentifully furnished for utterance of her requests to God that she never wanted variety of meet words to be presented unto him but when a surcharge of sighs and
come upon her back she said indeed little with her tongue but her eyes spoke much because she was loath to conrradict him whom she was bound to obey and at last she submitted to his will though against her own not onely because that habit was no better than others of her rank did wear but because it was a testimony of her Husbands love and of her own loyal subjection to his will wherein she followed the advice of Bishop Hall in his Contemplations It is not saith he for a good wife to judge of her Husbands will but to execute it neither wit nor stomack may carry her into a curious inquisition into the reasons of an enjoyned charge much less to a resistance but in an hoodwinckt simplicity she must follow whithersoever she is led as one that holds her chief praise to consist in subjection following her Husband as the Israelites did the cloudy Pillar which when it stood they stood when it went they followed And indeed it was no marvel that she was so obsequious to her Husband for amongst her papers were found special directions which she had drawn out of the Scripture for her conjugal affection and behaviour towards her Husband which were these which follow under this Title Duties which concern me in particular I must submit my self to my Husband as to the Lord Eph. 5. 22. I must account him my Head Eph. 5. 23. I must be in subjection to him in all things as the Church unto Christ Eph. 5. 24. I must get his consent even for those times that I set apart for Religious duties 1 Cor. 7. â— 10. I must walk pleasingly towards him 1 Cor. 7. 34. When by his death she was loosed from the Law of her Husband she would have returned to a meaner habit but because it was suitable to the place which she held in the City as having been wife to him who had been twice Mayor of Chester and divers times a Burgâ—ss of Parliament and for that God made such good things neither onely nor principally for the use and wearing of the wicked but for his children and that it might not be imputed either to singularity nor nigardize she made no remarkable change in her attire and indeed to keep down pride she would not eat the bread of idleness Prov. 31. 27. but willingly wrought with her hands as that vertuous woman did vers 13. and readily descended to such homely offices as were meet for the meanest of her servants Notwithstanding such excellent gifts and graces wherewith God had inriched her soul her mind was not lifted up to vaunting or vanity nor to the undervaluing or envying Gods gifts in others but in lowliness of minde she esteemed others better than her self Phil. 2. 3. disavowing her own praise though those that gave it thought it much less than her due and advancing others far before her self though in gifts they were far below her and no marvel for she was not as those who are far more curious to know the faults of others than to correct their own but an exact enquirer into her own life a severe censurer of her own imperfections and failings and as for others she observed them most for that which was best in them to make her self more holy by imitating them therein and more humble for that wherein she fell short of them She often presented and arraigned her self before Gods Tribunal to bring her self down in submission as guilty before him begging pardon on her knees at his hands and she came the lower by comparing her own faultiness infirmity and misery with his infinite Purity Power and Majesty in comparison of whom All Nations are but as the drop of the Bucket or the small dust in the Ballance Isa. 40. 15. which made her to think of him with admiration and love and of her self with detestation and loathing and when she took notice of any good thing in her self she boasted not of it even because she had received it and that of Gods free gift making it a Memento of thankfulness to him that gave it her knowing that he might have passed by her and given it to another and that he might be provoked to take it away from her if she should take any of that glory to her self which was due unto him alone She alwayes held this for a Maxime that if it be good to be esteemed vertuous and most desire to be so esteemed than to be so indeed is much better for the substance of a good thing is alwayes better than the semblance of it therefore she was so sincere in her whole course that she hated the least appearance of Hypocrisie She was one of those whom David blesseth for their integrity Blâ—ssed are they who keep his Testimonies and seek him with their whole heart Psal. 119. 2. Her love was without dissimulation Rom. 12. 9. She loved not in word or in tongue onely but in deed and in truth 1 Joh. 3. 18. and this appeared in that she made her deeds of charity and good will alwayes better than her words whereof she was so chary that some blamed her for want of affability which being objected to her she said I like not the lavish language of some who have their mouthes full of complemental curtesie to every one though their hearts be shut and contracted when their mouthes are so enlarged and if they have love enough within to maintain such liberality of words without I like my own heart the worse that it is not so ready to attend upon my tongue as on the sudden to minister cordial affections meet for such frank and friendly expressions She used rather to let her friends see her love by her works than to hear it by her words Her Constancy also was very remarkable by which her spirit was stedfast with God and her heart stedfast in his Covenant as the Israelites should have been but were not Psal. 78. 8 37. Her faith was grounded and settled Col. 1. 23. so that she was not carried away with divers and strange Doctrines Heb. 13. 9. much less with every wind of Doctrine Eph. 4. 14. But what she was for faith and godliness from her first conversion the same she was in all places at all times and in all companies But for the measure or degree of Grace she was not as a stake in an hedge which grows not but as a plant in the Garden that springeth up no dwarf in Gods house but one that by spiritual nourishment and daily exercise of her graces grew up apace towards the stature of Christ and as it s said of the path of the just Prov. 4. 18. She shined more and more unto the perfect day So that she was best at last and most heavenly minded when she had the least time to tarry on the earth She was a loyal and obedient Wife a careful and kinde though not a found Mother a gentle and beneficent Mistress a
stretched out for their relief For standing within his own Shop with his own hands he ministred supplies unto them all and so dismissed them for the present And the next morning when there was a renewall of their sad complaints his charitable care of them was renewed also and thus he continued morning by morning even for the space of near three moneths till the return of the Mayor into the City Besides his great care of supplying the wants of such poor as came unto him he had a speciall respect to poor House-keepers and Tradesmen such as were ashamed and unwilling to make their sad and necessitous condition known and a peculiar care of the godly poor concerning whom he used to advise with the Constables and Churchwardens of every Parish and according to their need would proportion some relief and help unto them and send it by the hands of the said Constables or Churchwardens And his care for the poor was not only in that extraordinary season as their exigents did require but so long as he continued in the land of the living And he was so constantly exercised in this great work of charity that he did it as it were naturally as the Apostle speaks of Timothy Phil. 2. 20. But though he did well yet heard he ill even for this and by some it was cast in his teeth that he made beggars and when he was asked by a man of place and estate what he would give to keep the poor from begging supposing that he would not be so forward therein as he was in relieving them he freely offered a great part of his estate upon condition that the other would do the like But when he saw his forwardness the other pulled back his shoulder and would not joyn with him therein He was given much to hospitality He would not eat his morsels alone by himself as Job 31. 17. He well remembred the Apostles direction Heb. 13. 2. Be not forgetfull to entertain strangers He was most loving and friendly to them and especially to such as did suffer for conscience sake As those godly Ministers who were silenced for Non-Conformity although his own judgement was well satisfied in that point To him they did continually resort and by him they were kindly entertained Insomuch as by the profaner sort he was cried out on as an Arch-Puritan But by those that took Religion to heart he was honoured with the title of Gaâ—us mine Hoste and of the whole Church as Rom. 16 23. If we consider his last Will and Testament we shall find in it very great and unparalleled acts of charity As he gave one third part of his temporall estate to his wife and another third part to his children according to the custome of the City so out of the other third part he left very large Legacies especially to the poor We will here omit many Legacies given to Ministers and others and point only at some that were more remarkeable and take them in his own words in his Will First I give to all the poor of this City and County that receive pay of Parishes and also to those that dwell in Almes-houses I give five shillings to each to be paid at my Buriall I give to one hundred more poor people ten shillings to each to be given to such as my Overseers shall think to have most need the honest poor to be chiefly looked unto Also I give to the poor of Lime where I was born and to the poor of Garnsey where I was new born five pounds to each place Also I forgive all the Moneys owing to me if it be under the value of twenty shillings to each These smaller summes which he had lent to the poor were very many Also my Will is and I give now more to fifty poor people of this City and County twenty shillings to each by my Overseers or the major part of them Thus out of that estate which God had given him he gave again by way of gratitude to God viz. to the poor who are Gods receivers God gave him and left him a competent estate after his many and great losses and which is more he gave him an heart to honour him with his substance Prov. 3. 9. and to lay it forth as became a faithfull Steward in the service and for the honour of his Lord who had intrusted him with it It 's true some did wonder and others did sharply censure him for his extraordinary charity and liberality and especially for that he left no greater a part of his estate to his wife But this may be said in his defence That the strait and close hearts of others are no fit pattern to measure his large heart by And besides God had opened his hand in giving very liberally unto him blessings both spirituall and temporall and especially spirituall even the graces and comforts of his Spirit and he enjoying such sweet communion with God even above most other men what marvel is it if he did more for God than other men use to do And as for his wife as he left her the third part of his estate so likewise he made her Executrix of his Will and thereby much more had come to her than there did had not some Debts which he accounted good failed and come short both of his and her expectation Besides he did assure himself that her Brother who was then living and a man of great estate would be ready to supply any of her wants Thus we have heard what Mr. Jurdaine did for God In the next place let us see also what God did for him Besides all those graces which were eminently in him and whereby he was enabled to act so zealously and vigorously for God which all were Gods free gift and that comfortable assurance that he had which was part of his reward The Lord also advanced him from a mean and low estate to the highest place of honour and dignity in that City His beginnings were but small as appears by his answer to some that threatened to follow him with Suits and not to give over till they had not left him worth a groat To whom he chearfully replied That he should be then but two pence poorer than when he came first to Exeter For said he I brought but six pence with me hither and yet through Gods blessing on his labours he gat a competent and comfortable estate whereby he maintained a large Family of children and servants kept hospitality was liberall to the poor and open-handed to any pious use even far beyond many who yet had larger estates But when he had the greatest temporall estate he set no great estimate upon these fading perishing things He set them not up in his heart as worldlings use to do but trod them under his feet And usually also he set them very low in his ordinary discourse of them and especially when he was speaking of Heaven and heavenly things And yet he did not
Ministry and Neighbourhood round about who by their concourse at her Funeral shewed plainly in what an high estimation she was amongst them and that her good Name was like a precious Oyntment powred forth The hope of Glory was that sovereign Cordial which abundantly revived and satisfied her spirits whilst she lived and now her hope is turned into fruition and her faith into vision All her sorrows and sighings are turned away and her imployment is without the least tediousness without interruption and intermission to sing Hosannahs and Allelujahs to him that sitteth upon the Throne and to the Lamb for ever more This Life was drawn up by my Reverend and worthy Friend Dr. Henry Wilkinson principal of Magdalen Hall Oxon. The Life and Death of Mrs. Elizabeth Wilkinson who dyed Anno Christi 1654. Mrs. Elizabeth Wilkinson was born of godly Parents of an ancient and well reputed Family of the Gentry in Devonshire Her Father was Mr. Anthony Gifford her Mother Mrs. Elizabeth Cottle and by them she was religiously educated during her minority After which she lived with an Aunt an old Disciple above twenty yeares together where she had many prizes put into her hands to get wisdome even many spirituall advantages for her eternall good But considering that no helps of education nor any means could prove effectuall without divine influences it pleased the Lord out of the riches of his mercy in a signall manner to vouchsafe a blessing to all those helps for the good of her soul and to crown all endeavours in order thereunto with good success She was observed from her childhood to be very docile very willing to learn industrious in reading of and swift to hear the Word of God preached She was very carefull to remember what she heard and took much pains in writing Sermons and collecting speciall Notes out of practicall Divines She had the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit with that she was eminently adorned She looked not as too many do upon gaudy and vain dresses as any ornament She neither liked them nor conformed to them but went in a grave decent and sober attire She was humble gentle tender-hearted and full of bowels of compassion remembring such as were in bonds as if she had been bound with them Heb. 13. 3. She was of so affable sweet and courteous a disposition that she gained abundance of love and respect from all those that conversed with her and by this means she was the greater gainer by all good conferences It was her usuall custome to move good discourse and ofttimes she turned the stream of other impertinent talk into something which was solid and tended unto edification and that ministred grace to the hearers She kept a Diary of Gods dealings with her soul and of other various dispensations that she met withall She was much busied in prayer meditation and self-examination She would often desire her Husband and others of her acquaintance to deal plainly and impartially with her For said she I would not be deceived with a formall profession nor with a temporary faith Perhaps through affection you may judge far better of me than I deserve wherefore I desire you to sift and search me throughly for I like such plain dealing best of all and those are my best friends which deal most plainly with me In process of time after a carefull watching over her heart and frequent addresses made unto the Throne of grace she found returns answerable to her prayers and desires God gave her a large measure both of parts and graces She was able not only to assert the truths of God but to convince gainsayers She abounded in love faith meekness humility and the rest of the graces of the Spirit insomuch as she became a Christian of the higher Form a tall Cedar of Libanus a grown solid and excellent Christian It pleased God for the triall of her graces to exercise her very much in the School of affliction Insomuch as ten years before her death she was one time reckoned with another at least half the time sick But God ordered this sickness of her body to be a medicine for her soul. For the spirit of prayer was much set on work hereby and her faith love and patience did appear and shine the more eminently Out of the Furnace she came forth as gold purified seven times so that the rod and staff correction and instruction went together and by these fatherly chastisements her soul did thrive more abundantly When she was able she neglected not the frequenting of the publick Assemblies they were her delight and she was a professed adversary to the withdrawing from the publick Congregations of the Saints Both them and the godly and Reverend Ministers of the Gospel she had in high esteem and reverenced them all her dayes And when she was not able to go to the publick Congregations she used to spend her time in reading prayer and meditating at home and imployed her friends to read to her and pray with her Such as were stable and sincere Christians were her delight Those she accounted more excellent than their neighbours She would often say that She valued no friends like to those who were friends to her soul. Concerning her deportment and carriage to her Relations for such as are reall Saints shew it in their severall capacities never was a Wife more full of sincere love and respect to an Husband whom she loved entirely and was as entirely beloved by him Her affection to her children was very tender She was carefull to Catechize instruct and to train them up in the fear of God and upon her Deathbed amongst many other excellent counsels and instructions she added this charge as from a dying Mother that they should remember that they had a Mother who would not allow them in any sin She was carefull also to instruct her servants and to teach them the fear of the Lord. Indeed she was ready and willing as opportunity was offered to do good unto all and as need required gave unto them both corporall and spirituall food She had a large heart and improved it to do a great deal of good in a little time Insomuch as the poor the sick the afflicted and the unexperienced to whom she was very mercifull and usefull whilest she lived had a very great miss of her when she was dead In brief she was one of those Worthies of whom the world was not worthy And yet to give a further Character of her I will here set down a Narrative copied exactly out of her own hand-writing of Gods gracious dealing with her soul as it follows word for word It pleased the Lord out of the riches of his grace to remove me from an ignorant place where I was born and to bring me very young into a Religious Family And when I was about twelve years of age upon the reading in the Practice of Piety concerning the happy estate of