be both wayward and full of affections which though his bodie bee but small yet he hath a great heart and is altogether inclined to euill and the more hee waxeth in reason by yeares the more he groweth proude froward wilfull vnruly and disobedient If this sparkle bee suffered to increase it will rage ouer and burne down the whole house For we are changed and become good not by birth but by education For like as planting and carefulnesse hath great power in all growing things euen so hath Education greater vertue and strength yea and better fruit in the diligent bringing vp of children Therefore parents must bee warie and circumspect that they neuer smile or laugh at any words or deedes of their children done lewdly vnhonestly naughtily wantonly or shamefully nor to kisse or commend them for so doing For children will commonly accustome themselues vnto such things as they shal see and perceiue to bee pleasing and delightfull to their father and mother Therefore they must correct and sharply reproue their children for saying or doing ill and make it knowne vnto them that they be neither wel pleased nor contented with their so doing but that it greatlie disliketh them And againe on the other side let them kisse and make much of them whensoeuer they shal see or heare them do any thing that is a signe of goodnesse But such is the fond and too much cockering affection of some parents towards their children that there is more neede in these daies to teach and admonish them not to loue them too much then to perswade them to loue them For Dauids darling was Dauids traytor 2. Sam. 15. all and 18.33 And this is the maner of God and his iust iudgemēt that when any father or mother begins as it were to set their childe or any thing els in the roome of God and so loue the same aboue him which gaue it either to take away the child or the thing or els to take away the parents before they prouoke him too much For as the Ape doth with too much embracings well neere kill her young whelpes so likewise some vndiscreet parents through immoderate loue and ouer-much pampering and cherishing do vtterly spoyle and marre their children Therefore if parents would haue their children liue they must take heede that they loue them not too much for the giuer is displeased when the gift is more esteemed then he Ill bringing vp is a cause of marring many which are of a good towardnesse and wit We may see by experience how that many children of good wit and towardnesse are marred and spoyled for want of good education and so get those vices from their tender yeares which all their life after doe for the most part accompanie them For when parents doe either too much cocker their children or by their lewd example allure them to naughtinesse or neglect due instruction what other thing I pray you can come to passe then which wee see in trees which from the beginning being neglected become crooked and vnfruitfull Contrariwise they that are pruned erected ordered and watered with the hand and cunning of the Husbandman are made straight fertile and fruitfull So that the manner of life education and custome are of great importance to moue to vertue What a great follie is it in parents to toyle themselues and bee occupied in getting riches and to bee nothing carefull for their children for whose sake riches are gotten Assuredly there can none more precious and better heritage bee left vnto children then if they bee well and vertuously brought vp from their tender age and be rightly instructed vnto vertue from their infancie This patrimonie remaineth with them continually nothing at all subiect to the stormes and troubles of fortune But wee see two speciall causes Two things which much hinder good education why some parents doe more negligently prouide that their children be instructed to wit too much cockering and niggardship In cockering mothers do more often offend and especially those which haue but few children These doe like as if some Husband man should refuse to till his field because hee hath but one onely Who could suffer this mans follie and peruersenesse of iudgement Is it not much more to be tilled because it is onely one Yes verely that so the profit and increase of one may recompence the want of many euen so after the same sort wee iudge it to bee the dutie of mothers so much more diligently to bring vp their children by how much they are fewer But wee see what doth let mothers The fewer the children the more diligently to be cared for that they bewel brought vp that they loue their children more dearely then that they can suffer them to be an houre out of their sight but this is cruel loue so to loue their children that they should bee as it were giuen ouer of their mothers vnto all naughtinesse of which peruerse and cruell loue not a fewe shall suffer the iust punishment which with great griefe of minde and with teares shall be compelled to see the vnbrideled wantonnesse and vngratiousnesse of their children vnto which they doe now all too late goe about to prouide a remedie The second cause which hindereth good education On the other side niggardship is oftentimes greater then that parents will bestow the cost Whatsoeuer is spent vpon horse-keepers or horse-breakers fooles minstrels dogs hawkes c. that some thinke well bestowed but if they see any thing to be spēt about instructing their children they thinke all that ill bestowed and are much more carefull that an horse bee well framed to vauting and leaping then that their childe bee well instructed to vertue This inconuenience commeth to the minds of children if they bee not well brought vp that they become seruile and open to all sin and naughtines For if a man leaue his field vntilled hee shall finde it to haue brought forth fearne and thistles and such vnprofitable weedes after the same sort if he shall leaue the wittes of his children vnlooked vnto and vnexercised hee shall be sure to reape most aboundant fruite of wantonnes and vngratiousnes The holie Ghost speaking in the Scriptures of foolish sonnes as that he that begetteth such a one getteth himselfe sorrow and that the father of a foole hath no ioy Prou. 17.21 meaneth it not so much of naturall fooles or idiots and such as are destitute of common reason although it is true that is a lamentable iudgemēt of God and a heauinesse to the parents of such a childe as of wicked children such as either are ignorant in the word or not knowing how to order one right steppe to the kingdome of God or els hauing some knowledge abuse it to maintaine their carnall lusts and appetite For this cause as it would griue parents to haue naturall fooles to their children or such as either in some imperfection of nature are dismembred or deformed and misfigured in the
one as is of right forme and shape meete and of strength to beare children and to keepe and gouerne an house euen such one as both the man and woman can finde in their hearts vnfainedly to loue aboue all other and to be content withall c. As concerning the beautie or comelines of the bodie where there is else no good propertie or qualitie beside Salomon saith Pro. 31.30 Fauour is deceitful and beautie is vanitie but the woman that feareth the Lord she shall be praised And Prou. 11.22 As a Jewell of golde in a swines snoute so is a faire woman which lacketh discretion or is of vncomely behauiour and hath not wit nor gouernment to behaue her selfe For beautie is a fraile gift and a slipperous and more profitable to those that behold it then to those that haue it for the beautifull woman can take no great pleasure in beautie but a little as it were in a glasse yet incontinently she forgetteth that she beheld and saw and yet it is many times both to her selfe and to them that behold her beautie a prouocation to much euill She that is faire waxeth proud of it and he that doth behold her becommeth subiect vnto filthie loue but in the minde which is iudged to bee the man doth consist the true lineaments and properties of fairenesse the which intice and prouoke spirituall and heauenly loue being mixt with nothing that is shamefull either to bee done or spoken and therefore there is no man so farre without witte that had not rather haue her which is foule and hard fauoured but yet is honest and vertuous then to haue her which is faire and vnhonest and also irreligious Happie and twice happie is that man and that woman that are coupled in marriage with a godly and vertuous mate bedfellow they are doubtlesse greatly blessed of God For House and riches are the inheritance of the fathers Pro. 11.22 and 19.14 but a prudent wife commeth of the Lord They therefore are not well in their wits but greatly deceiue themselues that make choise of wiues or husbands hauing regard onely to their stature comelinesse of personage or to their beautie and esteeme not more the riches of the minde Health also must bee considered in their choise least otherwise great inconuenience come thereby and least the whole house be poisoned and infected But we speake here of contagious sicknesses and not of such common infirmities vsuall diseases that both men and women are subiect vnto As of madnesse frenzie french pocks or such like which euery wise man and woman doth vtterly detest Neuerthelesse where any married parties are now togither and be visited with any such diseases they must one comfort and suffer with the other as they that are in one bodie c. Riches of temporall substance To haue the goods of temporall substance is to bee borne of noble parentes or to come of worshipfull stocke to haue landes liuings riches great offices gaines or occupyings and such like But the chiefest nobilitie and most worthie of commendation is indeed to be noble in vertues in good works maners and cōditions But to be borne of gentilitie and to vse and behaue himselfe vngently is euē as much as to shame himselfe and his kindred Such therefore as purpose to marrie ought carefully to foresee and looke to this matter least being too greedie of honour worship or wealth intending to haue the golde and catching the hotte coales doe burne themselues without recouery Chuse a wife for vertue only Pro. 19.14 for a man may buy gold too deare as we vsually say For temporal goods sake the matter miscarieth and is in daunger There is sometime great riches but with little honestie and lesse good conscience is it gathered togither And with the same riches will not continue alwayes prosperitie peace and quietnesse Many so trust to their wealth as that they will not frame themselues to any lawfull calling neither will they learne any therefore also can they do nothing to profit either their countrie or the common wealth but liue idly daintily and with pride ryot excesse and dishonestie doe quickly waste that which hath bin long in gathering togither Now when there is alway taking from the heape and nothing laide thereto it wasteth away in processe of time how great soeuer it hath beene Then followeth pouertie yea an intollerable and vnpatient pouertie For they that now lauish and spend prodigally altogither haue had no necessity hitherto but flowed in all wealth therefore after such a sunne-shine there commeth euer an extreame heate and thenceforth beginne they to warme themselues at the bare leaues and to spare when all is spent Such then as in their choise looke to the multitude of goods and regard not how they were gotten and whence they came haue customably such smoky hattes set vpon their heads that all the water in the riuer cannot wash away the corruption thereof For goods without God honestie and good conscience is a deadly poison and the bodily diuell himselfe Yea goods and riches in the hand of an vndiscreete and ignorant man is as a sharpe knife in the hand of a childe that doth no good therewith but wound hurt himselfe Wherefore euery man and euery woman in their election ought to haue more respect to vertue godlinesse discretion and knowledge then to riches Moreouer an hand that is occupied and winneth and getteth his liuing godly christianly and honestly doth far excell any riches that are won For although the world esteeme thē happy which liue in wealth ease idlenes yet the holy Ghost approueth alloweth thē best that liue of the meane profite of their labors Psalm 128.1.2 Seeke no match in marriage aboue thy degree And this also is a very necessary point to be obserued that the man chuse such a woman and the woman such a man as that there be equalitie betwixt them both in blood estate For by how much the greater and straighter the coniunction is of the husband the wife so much the more ought euery one prouide to be indifferently matched Equalitie in marriage to be respected and truely this equalitie of marriage is in two speciall things to be considered to wit estate and age For as two horses or two oxen of vnequall stature cannot be coupled vnder one selfe same yoake so a noble woman matching with a man of base estate or contrarily a Gentleman with a begger cannot bee consorted and well matched vnder the bands of wedlocke But yet when it hapneth that a man marrieth a woman of so high a birth he ought not forgetting that he is her husband more to honour and esteeme of her then of his equall or of one of meaner parentage and not only to account her his companion in loue in his life but in diuers actions of publike apparance hold her his superiour Which honor is not yet accompanied with reuerence as is that which
for manners sake we are wont to do to others And she ought to consider that no distinction or difference of birth and nobilitie can be so great but that the league which both Gods ordinance nature hath ordained betwixt men and women farre exceedeth it for by nature woman was made mans subiect But if a man shall take to wife an inferiour or meane woman he also ought to weigh that Matrimonie maketh equall many differences and further that he hath not taken her for a slaue or seruaunt but for a fellow and companion of his life Of the choise of a wife And seeing that election or choise is nothing else but to take a thing meete and conuenient to the end it is prepared for therefore euery one that must chuse ought to regard the ende and to know what thing is conuenient for it So that it is needefull that he be wise and discreet or else hee cannot dispose it nor perceiue what thing is conuenient for it Therefore if a man would aduisedly consider that he is to liue with his wife continually and she with him he would then be very circumspect in the choise of her which choise maketh either very much for his felicitie and comforte or else for his great miserie and discomfort For by how much the more a thing is vnited and knit vnto man so much the more it may helpe him if it be good or hinder him if it be euill Those dammages and hurtes which are inwardly in the bodie are worse then those which are without the bodie and those of the soule then those of the bodie and likewise men doe iudge of those things which are called good But peraduenture it may seeme vnto some thâ—t these things are not vniuersally true for vnto some the losse of their goods is more then the losse of their health But this thing doth not arise or happen of the goods or money it seâ—fe but because some man doth perswade vnto himselfe that to loose his goods is a thing intollerable and therefore the goods are not of more estimation then is life or health but it is mans affection that doth rule in this thing And therefore it seemeth lesse to some to be driuen out of his kingdome then to other some to loose a smal portion of his possessions Some will reuenge a word most cruelly and some other well beaten and buffeted will not reuenge it at all All these things doe proceed and come of the soule the which is most inwardly ioyned knit vnto man which hath more power in him then the bodie yea then man himselfe if it be then of so great importance what maner of friend thou haue to liue commodiously or incommodiously withall the which shall none otherwise dwell nor be in the selfe same chamber bedde nor house with thee but that thou mayest shake him off at thy pleasure how much more oughtest thou to take heede when thou chusest thee a wife the which must bee continually conuersant with thee at thy table in thy chamber in bed in thy secrets and finally in thy heart and breast If thou goe from home thou doest commit thy house thy familie thy goods and thy children of all other thinges the most pleasant vnto her shee is the last that leaueth thee at thy departing and the first that receiueth thee at thy returning thou departest from her with sweete imbracements and kisses and with sweete kisses and imbracements she receiueth thee at thy returne home vnto her thou disclosest thy ioy heauines So that it is an heauenly life to be conuersant and in the company with those that a man delighteth in and loueth But it is a calamitie infernal to be bound and forced to see those things that a man doth greatly hate abhorre or to be in company with those that a man would not be withall and yet cannot bee separated nor depart from them Hereof coÌ„meth as we doe see in some mariages so great ruines so wicked and vile deeds as maimes murders committed by such desperate persons as are loth to keepe and yet cannot lawfully refuse nor leaue them Therefore young folkes ought not to be too rash and hastie in their choise but to haue the good aduise and direction of their parents and trustie friendes in this behalfe who haue better iudgement and are mote free from the motions of all affections then they are And they must take heede least following the light and corrupt iudgement of their owne affections and mindes they change not a short delectation and pleasure into a continuall sorrow and repentance For wee doe learne by great and continuall vse and experience of thinges that the secret contractes made betweene those that be young doe seldome prosper whereas contrariwise those marriages that are made and stablished by the aduise of wise and religious parents doe prosper well But specially and before all thinges such as purpose to marrie must faithfully with feruentnesse and stedfast beleefe without ceasing make their intercession and prayer vnto God A good wife is aboue all things to be craued of God by prayer to whom all hearts are open and knowne that hee would not suffer them to goe amisse but as a tender father helpe and direct them to make a right choise so as they may liue honestly and prosperously as good christians ought to his glorie and their owne comfort For this purpose there is a notable example of Eleazar Abraham's seruant who being sent to get and make choise of a wife for Isaac his masters sonne beginneth his matter with prayer Gen. 24.12 c. So did Isaac also as appeareth in the same Chapter verse 63. When any haue determined with themselues to marrie and haue vsed all diligence thereto required rhey must desire of God by humble and earnest prayer good and prosperous successe in whose hand and power it is to giue it and doubtlesse he will effect it if they aboue all other thinges shall haue an vndoubted hope and confidence in him For if they after that they haue settled themselues and haue satisfied their appetites shall then resort vnto God by prayer desiring him that they may obtaine the thing that they most desire so it would appeare that they would make him the Minister of their voluptuous desires and pleasures and so doing their vowes and prayers should become most manifest blasphemie And therefore a man should not come vnto marriage as vnto a prophane thing with a loose and vnprepared minde but with a quiet wel purged minde as to a thing most sacred holy For Matrimonie doth not consist onely in the coniunction of the bodie neither yet in dauncing nor banquetting proceeding and brought vnto vs with many other things from the Gentiles but it should rather beseeme christians most studiously to pray vnto God that so weighty a thing as matrimony is might haue good and prosperous successe For Matrimony is a thing sanctified of God Heb. 13.4 the which
hee ought in like maner to remember that she is his fellow and companion of his goods and labours and that their children bee common betweene them bone of bones and flesh of the flesh of man And thus there shall bee in wedlocke a certaine sweete and pleasant conuersation without the which it is no mariage but a prison a hatred and a perpetuall torment of the minde So that the husband must let his wife perceiue and know that for the good opinion that he hath of her he doth loue her simply and faithfully and not for any vtilitie or pleasure For who so doth not perceiue that he is beloued for his owne sake will not lightly doe the same to another for the thing that is loued loueth againe If mony or nobilitie could perceiue and vnderstand that they were beloued they would if they had any feeling at all of loue requite it with loue but when the soule is loued in as much as it may loue it giueth loue for loue and loueth againe The breaker of horses that doth â—se to ride and to pace them doth handle the rough and sturdie colt with all craft rigour and fiercenes that may be but with the colt that is more tractable he taketh not so great paine A sharpe and shrewd wife must bee pleased and mitigated with loue and ruled with maiestie and the more gently thou doest vse and shew thy selfe vnto her that is meeke and honest the more benigne and meeke thou shalt finde her But she that is noble and of a stout minde and stomacke the lesse thou doest looke to bee honoured the more she will obey and honour thee But yet the wise husband shall neuer set himselfe so farre in loue that he forget that he is a man the ruler and gouernour of the house and of his wife and that he is set as it were in a Station to watch and diligently to take heede what is done in his house and to see who goeth out and in 1. Cor. 11.3 Ephes 5.23 For although the husband by Gods ordinance bee the head ouer his wife yet hee may not abuse or despise her but must louingly defend and keepe her from all iniuries and all euils as his owne bodie For like as the head seeth and heareth for the whole bodie ruleth and guideth the bodie and giueth it strength of life or as Christ doth defend teach and preserue his Church and is the Sauiour comfort eye heart wisedome and guide thereof euen so must the husband bee head vnto his wife in like maner to shew her like kindnes and after the same fashion to guide her and rule her witâ— discretion for her good and preseruation and not with force and wilfulnesse to intreate her but to bee her defender instructor teacher and comfort So that when the husband hath obtained that his wife doth trulie and hartily loue him there shall then need neither precepts nor lawes for loue shall teach her moe things and more effectually then all the precepts of all the Philosophers Hee ought therefore to indeuour and more force himself that his wife may loue him then that she may feare him When his wife shall offend or displease him hee may not hate her or quarell with her but patiently and mildly admonish her Ephes 5.18.29 For no man yet euer hated saith the Apostle his owne bodie but cherisheth it and maketh much of it So then he that loueth his wife loueth himselfe for thereby hee enioyeth peace and comfort and helpe to himselfe in all his affaires therefore in the same verse Paul counselleth husbands to loue their wiues as their bodies And after in the 33. verse as though it were too little to loue them as their bodies hee sayth Leuit. 10.10 Let euery one loue his wife as himselfe that is as his body and soule too For if God commanded men to loue their neighbours as themselues much more are they bound to loue their wiues as themselues which are their next neighbours 1. Sam. 1.8 As Elkanah did not loue his wife lesse for her barrennesse â—ut sayd Am not I better vnto thee then ten sonnes As though he fauoured her more for that which she thought her selfe despised So a good husband will not take occasion to loue his wife lesse for her infirmities but comfort her more for them as this man did that shee may beare with his infirmities too Gal. 6.2 And so the one to helpe to beare the others burthen and so they shall the better fulfil the law of Christ For as in a citie there is nothing more vnequall theÌ„ that euery man should bee like equall so it is not conuenient that in one house euery man shuld be like and equall together There is no equality in that citie where the priuate man is equal with the Magistrate the people with the Senate or the seruants with the master but rather a confusion of all offices and authoritie The husband and the wife are Lords of the house Genes 1.28 Genes 2.18 vnto whom the Lord said Be ye Lords ouer the fish of the sea and ouer the fowle of the heauen and ouer euery beast that moueth vpon the earth And the selfe same Creator said that the woman should bee a helpe vnto the man Therefore the husband without any exception is master ouer all the house and hath as touching his familie more authoritie then a king in his kingdome The wife is ruler of all other things but yet vnder her husband There are certaine things in the house that onely doe appertaine to the authoritie of the husband wherwith it were a reproach for the wife withoâ—â— the consent of her husband to meddle withall as to receiue strangers or to marry their daughter But there are other things in the which the husband giueth ouer his right vnto his wife as to rule and gouerne her maidens to see to those things that belong vnto the kitchin and to huswiferie and to their household stuffe other meane things as to buy and sell certaine necessarie things may be ordered after the wit wisedome and fidelitie of the woman It cannot wel be rehearsed how many vtilities and profites the mutual concord and loue of man and wife doth bring to great things both at home and abroade nor how many losses and incommodities doo growe of the dissention and discorde betweene them For the housholde when their maister and their mistresse or dame are at debate can no otherwise bee in quiet and at rest then a cittie whose Rulers agree not but when it seeth them in concord and quietnesse then it reioyceth trusting that they wil be euen so vnto them as it perceiueth then to be among themselues wherein surely they are not deceiued for if the man and his wife doo louingly and gently support and intreate one an other they learne not to disdaine or for euerie light fault to be angrie with their seruants or yet for any household words to bee vexed or
and wisedome vnto him As 1. Pet. 3.6 Ephes 5.33 Ester 1.1 2. c. 12. So that womē may not prouoke their husbands by disobedience in matters that may bee performed without offence to God neither to presume ouer him either in kindred or wealth or obstinately to refuse in a matter that may trouble household peace and quiet For disobedience begetteth contempt of the husband and cōtempt wrath and is many times the cause of troubles betweene the man and the wife If the obedience importeth any difficultie she may for her excuse gently propound the same yet vpon condition to obey in case the husband should persist in his intent so long as the discommoditie importeth no wickednesse For it is better to continue peace by obedience then to breake it by resistance And indeede it is naturall in the members to obey the conduct and gouernement of the head Yet must not this obedience so far extend as that the husband should command any thing contrary to her honour credit and saluation but as it is comely in the Lord Col. 3.18 Ephes 5.22 Therfore as it were a mōstrous matter and the means to ouerthrow the person that the body should in refusing all subiection obedience to the head take vpō it to guide it selfe and to commaund the head so were it for the wife to rebell against the husband Let her then beware of disordering and peruerting the course which God in his wisedome hath established and with all let her vnderstand that going about it she riseth not so much against her husband as against GOD and that it is her good and honor to obey God in her subiection obedience to her husband If in the practise of this dutie she finde any difficultie or trouble through the inconsiderate course of her husband or otherwise let her remember that the same proceedeth not of the order established by the Lorde but through some sin afterward crept in which hath mixed gall among the honie of the subiection and obedience that the womā should haue enioyed in that estate wherein together with Adam she was created after the image of God And so let her humble her selfe in the sight of God and be well assured that her subiection and obedience is acceptable vnto him Likewise that the more that the image of God is restored in her and her husband through the regeneration of the holie Ghost the lesse difficultie shall she finde in that subiection and obedience as many in their mariage haue in deede tried to their great contentment and consolation Further there is a certaine discretion and desire required of women to please the nature inclinations maners of their husbands so long as the same imports no wickednesse For as the looking-glasse howsoeuer faire and beautifully adorned is nothing woorth if it shew that countenance sad which is pleasant or the same pleasant that is sad so the woman deserueth no commendation that as it were contrarying her husband when he is merie sheweth her selfe sad or in his sadnesse vttereth her mirth for as men should obey the lawes of their cities so women the maners of their husbands To some women a becke of her husband is sufficient to declare that there is somewhat amisse that displeaseth him and specially if she beare her husband any reuerence For an honest matron hath no neede of any greater staffe but of one word or one sowre countenance Moreouer a modest and chaste woman that loueth her husband must also loue her house as remembring that the husband that loueth his wife cannot so well like of the sight of any tapestrie as to see his wife in his house For the woman that gaddeth from house to house to prate confoundeth her selfe her husband and familie Titus 2.5 But there are foure reasons why the woman is to goe abroad First to come to holie meetings according to the dutie of godlinesse The second to visit such as stand in neede as the dutie of loue and charitie doe require The third for employment and prouision in household affaires committed to her charge And lastly with her husband when hee shall require her The wife must keepe a good tongue Gen. 20.1 c. The euill and vnquiet life that some women haue and passe with their husbands is not so much for that they commit with and in their persons as it is for that they speake with their tongues When the wife doth holde her peace she keepeth the peace The cause of domesticall combats If the wife would keep silence when her husband beginneth to chide he should not haue so vnquiet dinners neither she the woorse supper which surely is not so for at the same time that the husband beginneth to vtter his griefe the wife then beginneth to scold and chafe wherof doth follow that now then most vnnaturally they come to handy gripes more beastlike thē christianlike which their so doing is both a great shame Silence becommeth a woman and a foule discredit to them both The best meanes therefore that a wife can vse to obtaine and maintaine the loue and good liking of her husband is to bee silent obedient peaceable patient studious to appease his choler if he bee angrie painfull and diligent in looking to her businesse Lacke of knowledge of Gods word is the principall cause why wiues doe not their dutie to their husbands to be solitarie and honest The chiefe and speciall cause why most women do faile in not performing this dutie to their husbands is because they be ignorant of the word of God which teacheth the same and all other duties and therefore their soules and consciences not being brought into subiection to God and his word they can neuer vntill then yeeld and performe true subiection and obedience to their husbands and behaue themselues so euery way as christian wiues are in dutie bound to doe But if wiues bee not so dutitiful seruiceable and subiect to their husbands as in conscience they ought the onely cause thereof for the most part is through the want and neglect of the wise discreet and good gouernment that should be in the husbands besides the want of good example that they shuld giue vnto their wiues both in word and deede One heart and one will For as the common saying is Such a husband such a wife a good Iacke maketh a good Gill. For so much as mariage maketh of two persons one How the loue faithfulnesse and dutie of maried folkes may be kept and increased therefore the loue of the husband and wife may the better bee kept and increased and so continued if they remember the duties last spoken of as also not forget these three points following 1. They must be of one heart will and mind and neither to vpbraide or cast the other in the teeth with their wants and imperfections any waies or to pride themselues in their gifts but rather the one to endeuour to supplie the others wants that
Step-father and Step-mother admonish and put them in minde of their dutie towards the children of the one and the others for Step-father and Step-mother doth signifie a sted-father and a sted-mother that is one father or one mother dieth and another succeedeth and commeth in their stead and roome Therfore to the end that both their loues may be setled towards the children of the one and the other they must remember that they are stead-father and stead-mother that is in stead of their owne father and mother and therefore they ought to loue them to tender them and to cherish them as their owne father or mother did They must not look vpon them like Rehoboam who told his people 1. King 12.13 to 21. that he would bee worse vnto them then his predecessor for then the children will dislike of you and turne from you as his subiects did from him but ye must come to theÌ„ as Dauid came to the people after Sauls death who sayd 2. Sam. 2.7 Though your master Saul bee dead yet I will raigne ouer you so ye must say to them though your father be dead or though your mother be dead yet I will be a father or I will be a mother vnto you so the children wil loue you as much as their dead father or dead mother did For that man and that woman that are led with discretion reason and consideration will reckon himselfe and his wife all one and likewise she will account herselfe and her husband as one And therefore they ought to account both the children of the one and of the other as common to them both for if friendship make all things common among friends insomuch that many haue loued fauoured their friends children as their owne how much more effectually and perfectly ought mariage to cause the same which is the highest degree not only of friendships but also of al blood and kindred But Step-mothers doe more often offend and faile in this dutie then men by reason that their affections bee stronger then mens and many times ouer rule them and therefore they are earnestly to bee admonished and warned that they shew themselues to those motherles children no step-mothers friendship but a right motherly kindnes Let the step-mother aduisedly consider that God hath ordained and appointed her in stead of their owne mother to bee to them a right true mother and not onely to regard them as children but as orphane children and requireth her to loue them and to do them good as to her owne What a griefe would it be to her hart if she should know now that her owne children whom she hath borne in her owne bodie should after her death haue a stepmother that would be rigorous churlish and vnkinde vnto them doubtles those childrens mother that dead is had vpon her death-bed no lesse care for her children Let her therfore alwaies haue in minde this saying of our Sauiour Christ As you measure vnto other Matth. 7.2 so it shall be measured to you againe That is as the step-mother doth intreate the children of her predecessor so another wife may come after her and intreate her children for he that tooke away the first mother and sent her can take away the second mother and send a third which will not bee like a stead-mother to hers vnlesse she bee like a stead-mother to these Verely a good woman will bee vnto her husbands children that which she may heare them call her so often that is Mother For what christian woman is so farre from all humanitie and naturall affection that will not be moued and mittigated with this word Mother of whom soeuer it be spoken And chiefly of children which cannot flatter but speake euen so from their heart like as they would to their owne mother of whom they were borne How sweete is the name of friendship how many iniuries hatreds and displeasures doth it hide and put away Then how much more effectuall ought the sweet name of mother to be which is full of incredible loue Therefore euery religious and louing wife will be mollified and moued in her heart and minde when she shall heare her selfe named mother by any of her husbands childreÌ„ Otherwise she shall shew her selfe to be more vnnaturall and vnkinde then the wilde sauage beast for there is no beast so outragious and cruell but if any other yong beast of her owne kinde fawne vpon her she will by and by shew kindnes and mildnes vnto it And shall not her husbands children make her kinde and louing vnto them when they call and speake vnto her by the louing and sweete name of mother As wiues ought to goe comely cleanly and handsomely in their apparrell so they must in any wise beware of pride riot or excesse therein 3. The third and last point that appertaineth to the dutie of wiues is that they doe not weare gorgeous and sumptuous apparell or broidered haire trimmed with golde but that after the example of holie women which trusted in God they bee sober in outward apparell and ought to bee garnished and decked inwardly with vertues of their minds as with gentlenes meeknes quietnes and chastitie which indeed are most precious things in the sight of God This point is so plainly spoken of by the Apostle to Timothie chap. 2. vers 9.10 in which place he so flatly condemneth both the excesse and pride of apparell as also the pompe curiositie and wantonnesse which women vse in trimming their heads by plating crisping broyding curling curiously laying out that no man can say more against it in so few words as hee hath spoken to the vtter dislike therof For if a maÌ„ should occupie himselfe and giue libertie to his penne to write of the horrible abuse and excessiue pride Pride is hatefull before God and man Be not therefore proude for thou art but dâ—ff and ashes that many women commit in this behalfe hee should rather want time to write then matter to speake Therefore such women as will not reforme themselues herein we leaue them to the Lord who no doubt will in his appointed time not onely seuerely punish theÌ„ but also their husbands for suffering this great wickednesse and dissolutenesse in their wiues as he did the Iewes for the same sinne as plainly may bee seene in Esay 3.16 c. For so it falleth out according to the common prouerbe Prou. 16.18 That pride goeth before and shame and destruction commeth after And on the contrarie part we hope that such women as be true professors of Christ his religion will both attire and dresse their heads so decently and also content themselues with such comely apparel as best beseemeth their calling and degree so as by their good example Titus 2.3 they may draw on other women to reforme themselues in this behalfe so rather to come short of that which their abilitie and place would serue to maintaine then any waies to exceede herein to the
their godly education and vertuous bringing vp of their children as to Abraham for he commanded his sonnes and his household to keepe the way of the Lord. So Dauid counselled his sonne Salomon to serue God Gen. 18.19 1. Chro. 28.9 Act. 10.2 2. Tim. 1 5. Parents must performe their dutie to their children moderately with great grauitie and authority Gen. 22.7.8 Pro. 4.3.4 5 6 Pro. 3.1.2 c. That is thought to be well done which is done by example 2. Sam. 13.28.29 Ezech. 16.44 Esay 24.2 Fruites are wont to take their shape and nature of the tree with a perfect heart and a willing mind It is said also of Cornelius that he feared God and all his household Likewise of Eunica the mother of Timothie that shee nourished vp her sonne in the words of faith and good doctrine For where a vertuous and godly childhood goeth before there a godly and vertuous age followeth after Contrariwise when the parents are not carefull to teach their children to know God to know themselues when they do not breed them vp in vertue nor reproue them when they doe amisse they then become corrupt in their vnderstanding abominable in their doings ignorant and voyd of all knowledge and grace and of reuerence or feeling of nature If Parents be desirous to haue their children vertuous and honest indeed as in conscience they ought then they must bee diligent and carefull to practise godlinesse honestie themselues For we see by experience according to the common Prouerbe As the old cocke croweth the young learneth such a father such a sonne and such a mother such a daughter For like as when the head is well and sound and also the stomacke pure from hurtfull humours the bodie is commonly well affected euen so where the head or chiefe of any familie or household is religious and sound in the faith and feareth God it commonly goeth well with all the household What shall it auaile for parents to teach their children honestie modestie when they themselues in their workes and behauiour do inuite them to wantonnesse and lewdnesse Verball instruction without example of good deeds is a dead doctrine and contrariwise good examples are the life of instruction to make it profitable and effectuall If the example of parents be contrary to their instructions If we say they teach their childrē sobrietie modestie and chastitie yet thēselues will follow drunkennesse foule lasciuious speeches gestures and actions it is as if with their tongues they should say be vertuous and by the hands leade them with them to all vice and corruption So that wicked parents are wicked counsellers to their children If we would take him to bee a Monster in nature and vnworthie to liue in a Common-wealth that should counsell his childe to drunkennesse and fornication what shall wee thinke of those who committing such iniquitie do by their example much more mightily put forward their children to such abomination then by word they are able What account can those parents giue vnto GOD who by their euill example haue drawne into Hell their children whom he deliuered to their charge to be guided into heauen Albeit such parents pitie not themselues yet at last let them take pitie of their children and not carrie them with them into euerlasting destruction Such parents then deserue grieuously to be reproued as shall vse any lewd speeches or shamelesse behauiour in briefe any worldly or carnal actions in the presence of their children to whom their example may be as a dispensation to giue themselues to the like As also how can they forbid that in their children which they themselues do commit How can they correct them for the faults which they themselues vse Albeit children in respect and reuerence to their parents dare not reply and say that themselues doe these things for the which they reproue them yet will the neighbours or others obiect it to their shame Besides their authoritie shal be so much the lesse in that they declare in their works and actions that they allow that which they forbid in words If parents therefore desire that their instruction may be effectuall and yeeld fruit let them declare the same in holy life vertuous conuersation let them so order and gouerne themselues that their children seeing the same as it were in a glasse may bee restrained frō dishonest speech wicked deeds Let them do as guides that shew the right way ouer foordes and riuers by going before those whom they leade that their children following the steps and examples of their parents may conforme themselues to their vertues and so with them and by them be led to saluation and life euerlasting For this cause Moses gaue commandement vnto the Iewes Deut. 6.5.6.7 31.13 that the law might be kept in their families that they might prosper in al that they went about 2. Sam. 6.11 Whē Obed-edom had receiued the Arke of God into his house which signified true religion 1. King 17.10 c. 2. King 4.1 c the Lord blessed him and all his household When the widdow of Zarepthah in the dayes of Eliah and the other widdow of Israel in the dayes of Elisha had receiued the Prophets of God into their houses how mightily mercifully the Lord prouided for them who is ignorant When our Sauiour Christ had restored the Rulers sonne to his health the Ruler beleeued and all his familie Iohn 4.53 Luke 19.9 After Zacheus had receiued Christ into his house and was conuerted saluation came to the same household Act. 10.44 To be short when Cornelius the Centurion embraced the Gospell his familie also beleeued and were baptized and the holy Ghost fell vpon them all which heard the preaching And how well that house was ordered 2. Tim. 1.5 3.15 where Timothie was brought vp his knowledge in the Scriptures from a child can witnesse And this is also a point worthie to be remembred that whereas the Lord by his Prophet Ezechiel Eze. 10.20.21 calleth the children of the Israelites which they had begotten His children because they were partakers of the promises signed with the seale of his couenant And the Prophet calleth them Psal 127.3 The inheritance of the Lord. Such parents therefore as bee Christians must know that their children are also the children of God and partakers of those blessings that are promised to them in Christ Iesus their Sauiour and therefore that they shall do great iniurie to God himselfe whose children they are if they shall not see them carefully brought vp in his feare And much more if they as before time See more of this point in the Treatise of the vse and necessitie of catechising many haue done bequeath them and in a maner consecrate and sacrifice them to the seruice of men by thrusting thē into Abbeyes Munckeries Frieries Nunneries and Seminaries there to bee brought vp and remaine in perpetuall bondage of ignorance
of God It is not ynough to feed them to cloath them to nourish their bodies with necessarie sustenance For the heathen doe this which know not God and the sauage brute beasts and the birds which haue no vnderstanding they breed vp their young ones and are tender and painful to prouide for theÌ„ The Asse though she be dul the Beare and Lyon though they be wilde and cruell yet seeke they far and neare to get wherewith to helpe their young Therefore if there be any or can bee any which doth forsake and leaue his own hee is more beastly then the foolish Asse and more vnnaturall then most cruell Beares and Lyons and Tygers But in this behalfe men are for the most part ouer-carefull For this cause many builde their houses with blood and seeke possessions by iniquitie they ioyne house to house and field to field and will dwell alone vpon the earth Esay 5.8 they oppresse the poore and needie and doe wrong to the Widdow and the fatherlesse they make money their God and spoyle one another and all to prouide for the children This is the couer and cloake for all their mischiefes they may not leaue their children vnprouided for Vnhappy are such fathers which in this sort care for their children Esay 33.1 by the ruine and spoyle of the needie and innocent and so breake the commandement of God because their portion shall bee with the wicked in the lake that burneth with fire and brimstone And vnhappy are their children because they are partakers of their Fathers wickednesse and therefore shall also be partakers of punishment with them Psalm 37.35.36 The Prophet Dauid saith I haue seene the wicked strong and spreading himselfe like a greene Baytree Yet hee passed away and loe he was gone and I sought him but hee could not be found His roote was deepe his stocke strong his braunches broad hee spread ouer and shadowed the whole countrie yet he passed away He departed his sonnes died his house soone decayed and his name was in little time quite forgotten Oh how much better then is it to furnish the mindes of your children and to instruct them in godlinesse to teach them to know God to leade their life vertuously and to rebuke them and chastise them for ill dooing Psalm 111.10 Pro. 9.10 The beginning of wisedome is the feare of God Let them then learne what that good and acceptable will of God is Shewe them the way in which they should walke that they go neither to the right hand Psalm 19.7.8.6 and .119.6.105 nor to the left The word of God is pure and giueth vnderstanding to the simple it is a light to their footesteps it teacheth those that are young to amend their waies For children by nature are darkenesse and cannot see except they bee lightned with Gods word And therefore Salomon saith Pro. 22.6 Catechise a childe in his youth and hee will remember it when he is olde This is the right blessing which fathers mothers giue to their children when they cause God to blesse them too When Christ came into Ierusalem the yong children receiued him Math. 21.15.16 They cried Osanna to the sonne of Dauid Blessed is he that commeth in the name of the Lord. Christ giueth witnesse of them By the mouth of babes and sucklings Psal 82. hast thou set foorth thy praise The words of the litle and simple children were able to confound the wisedome of the Pharisees Thus were they taught from their cradle so carefull were their godly parents for them Contrariwise they cannot haue any wisedome that despise the law of the Lorde They become blinde and wicked and abominable in all their waies They haue no sence nor feeling of the will of God They cannot knowe light from darkenesse nor God from Belial 2. King 23. 2. Sam. 15.1 c. Such were the children that derided Elisha as also Absolon whose heart Sathan had so possessed with the spirit of pride and ambition that hee went about to depose his father from his kingdome 1. King 1.5 So also his brother Adoniiah vsurped the kingdome of his father Dauid Another care which a father ought to haue of his children is tt traine them vp in studie and vertue and of a godly life Math. 5.8 Blessed are the pure in heart for they shall see God They which keepe not this way are the children of wrath Heerein standeth the whole profession of a christian life For God hath not called vs to vncleannesse but vnto holinesse 1 Thess 4.7 This is the will of God and this is our promise made vnto him that wee serue him in holinesse and righteousnesse al the daies of our life Luk. 1.74.75 that we increase in vertue and growe from grace to grace A wise and louing father which sendeth his sonne to a daungerous iourney either by sea or land first instructeth him with aduise and telleth him in what sort he shall auoyde periles Take heed saith he that way is daungerous which thou must passe The sea is terrible the waues rise vp as high as heauen and by and by thou shalt see a pitte as lowe as hell The sandes may swallow thee the rockes may destroy thee Thou shalt passe by huge mountaines and through a wildernesse where theeues wil assault thee Thy heart wil quake Thou shalt crie for succour and finde no man to helpe thee In these and these places hath many a good mans childe beeÌ„ cast away Oh take heed my sonne thou art the staffe and the comfort of mine age If ought come to thee otherwise then well I shall come end my daies in sorrow If a father bee thus carefull that this childe should escape worldly dangers hee must be carefull of spirituall daungers in which whosoeuer is lost is lost for euer Therefore thus or to this effect will he say to him Oh my sonne vnderstand what God hath done for thy sake Take heede to thy selfe 1 Pet. 5.8 Iam. 4.7 Pro. 18.10 Psalm â—0 15 The world is all ouer strawde with snares The diuell raungeth and seeketh whom he may deuoure Giue no grouÌ„d to him but resist him and hee will flie from thee Be strong in faith The name of the Lord is a strong tower of defence Call vpon him in the day of thy trouble and he will deliuer thee He will giue thee of his spirit Take heede my sonne and bee not deceiued let no wilfulnesse cast thee away If sinners intice thee be not a companion of them in wickednesse Pro. 1.10.11 Rom. 12.2 1. Ioh. 2.15 Fashion not thy selfe to the likenesse of this world for the world passeth away and the lust thereof He that loueth this world the loue of God is not in him Be not like vnto them that perish Psalm 51.5 Ephe. 2.3 Col. 1.12 13. Thou wast conceiued and borne in sinne Thou art by nature the child of wrath but God made thee meete to
and therefore your owne children shall be one of the furies in hell to torment you The Lord open your eyes Pro. 22.6 to foresee and she these fearefull iudgements But if you will bring them vp well and vertuously they shall be the better for it all their liues after nay the world to come shall reape this benefit for such children as you now bring vp such parents shal they be after you when you are gone and looke what parents you leaue behind you the like childreÌ„ again shal they reare vp Wherfore O you parents you are either the making or the marring of the world for if your childreÌ„ learne no good erudition at your hands how should they be good fathers after you and how should they leaue that to their posteritie by the right of inheritance which they neuer receiued from their ancestors To conclude this poynt we say once againe Oh ye parents endeuour to goe forward in this vertuous education of your children and then God no doubt shal nor will hide no necessarie secret or instruction from you neither will hee withhold any good blessing from your posteritie so shall ye be fathers of the faithfull as Abraham was if you will haue the same care and practise the same diligence for your children and familie that he did Gen. 18.17.18 and 12.2.3 Disheriting of the eldest son is a thing very vnlawfull 2. Chro. 21.3 1. King 21.3 Leâ—it 25.23 Num. 27.3 c Parents also haue to remember that they shall commit an act very vnnaturall iniurious and vngodly if they should vndeseruedly disinherit their eldest sonne For as nature in all her workes for the most part seemeth to make some one thing to bee chiefe before all the rest whereby the same is and the rather continueth so reason in the order of a familie which is an imitation of a state ciuill or bodie politike perswadeth of experience and necessitie that there be one before the rest as chiefe Whereby may be conserued that beauty of vnitie and harmonie of concord which the Almightie in his creation so wonderfully and diuersly teacheth and our Sauiour himselfe so carefully and especially commended to his Church And thereof seemeth to come that preheminence or more speciall regarde Exod. 13.1 2. and 34.19 20. Leuit. 27.26 Num. 3.13 18.16 which the law of God in the olde Testament appointed to his people the Israelites to be obserued towards the first begotten sonne and likewise somewhat concerning other dumbe creatures which first were brought forth into the world By the ancient law of the Iewes the eldest had double so much as the others of the fathers goods and alone to the eldest pertained the blessing of the father wherewith should seeme alwaies the heritage to goe and succeede as is manifest by the wil of God in Deuter. 31.15 16 17. If a man haue two wiues one loued and another hated and they haue borne him children both the loued and also the hated if the first borne be the sonne of the hated then when the time commeth that hee appointeth his sonnes to bee heires of that which hee hath hee may not make the sonne of the beloued first borne before the sonne of the hated which is the first borne but he shall acknowledge the sonne of the hated which is the first borne and giue him double portion of all that hee hath for hee is the first of his strength and to him belongeth the right of the first borne The Patriarkes and others the seruants of God although by diuine reuelation and other notice of the will of God they were certified that they might marrie many or sundrie wiues at one time yet did they exclude from their heritage and prerogatiue of the blessing all the children of those secondarie and after mariages This appeareth in Gen. 21.10 The sonne of the bond woman shall not be heire with my sonne Isaack yet was hee the eldest but was not the sonne of the first mariage Also an heire is the work and institution of nature and heritage is due to the sonne by nature therefore it is so due that hee must needs haue it seeing those things which come by nature or be natural are not mutable or to bee changed Moreouer this name Heire which in maner with all Nations is the eldest he is the successor of the law Nationall besides the lawes natural and diuine And that father who maketh another heire then is by these authorities appointed cannot but expresse himselfe a rebell in disobeying and contemning so great lawes and authorities beginning a new law of his owne head contrary thereunto Then what is more vniust then to doe contrary to all lawes and therwith to disobey the will of God to peruert the due order of discent preferring the second mariage before the first the yonger before the elder the late offpring before the first begotten so much tendred and respected Now as the greatest iniurie a father can do to his son is to disherit him so is it the most reproachfull blot or dammage to suffer the infamie and discredit of disherison For if the eldest sonne be worthie to be disherited in his fathers house he may be thought not worthie to draw breath out of it for that hee ought to bee conuinced faultie in those crimes and hainous offences which bee either repugnant to the dutie of a child or not meete for the profession of a Christian namely if hee strike or offer violence to his father Deut. 21.18 c. if he oppresseth him with some great wrong if he seeke his death or destruction by poysoning or otherwise if hee lie with his fathers wife Gen. 35.22 49. â— 4 1. Chro. 5.1 if he wil not suffer his father to make his will if he be not of the true and Catholike faith but is conuinced to be an heretike wherby his life and heritage is in hazard Or if he refuse to succour and deliuer his father out of prison by his suertiship or if he follow the trade and companie of such persons as in the law be counted infamous vile and most dishonest as Iuglers Sorcerers Coniurers Theeues and Pirats Or if he be an idiot a mad man a natural or lunatike person Or if the father offering him a meet mariage vnder 25. yeres he refuseth it delighteth to liue coÌ„tinually in whoredom and filthy order of life these such like be the causes that the ciuil or Ecclesiastical lawes do assigne The dutie of Children towards their parents THis dutie of children as it may bee gathered out of the holie Scriptures consisteth in fiue points 1. First that they a Ephes 6.1 2 3. Col. 3.20 Pro. 8. and 4.1 and 23.22 obey their parents and do serue them and also do b Leuit. 10.3 Nâ—m 12.14 feare loue honour and reuerence them not onely in word and deed but in their harts minds also 2. Secondly that they follow their good precepts and examples of life 3.
are so pinching and sparing both towards themselues and their neighbours that although they haue much wealth yet they cannot find in their hearts to take part in any frugal and good measure of those transitorie blessings which God in mercie hath giuen them but feed grosly and very niggardly and clothe themselues very meanly keeping a beggerly house so that as the common prouerbe is a man may as soone breake his necke as his fast So that the state of such a worldling and couetous rich mā is most miserable to whom God hath bountifully bestowed great wealth vpon and yet hath not the grace to vse his riches well both to his owne comfort and also to the good of his neighbour but heapeth vp riches as the Psalmist saith and cannot tell who shall gather them Psal 39.6 This sheweth that it is the plague of God that befalleth vpon such a miserable couetous worldling when he hath plentie of al things The couetous mā in gaining riches loseth himselfe and yet wanteth a liberall heart to imploy and vse thē rightly And therefore the holy Ghost in the book of the Preacher is not content once or twise to finde fault and to checke this as a great vanitie and abuse but speaketh of it fiue sundrie times where in one place he there saith There is an euill which I saw vnder the sunne and it is much among men A man to whom God hath giuen riches and treasure and honour and he wanteth nothing for his soule of all that it desireth but God giueth him no power to eate thereof but a strange man shall eate it vp this is vanitie and this is an euill sicknes Eccl. 2.24 and 3.12.13.22 and 5.17 and 6.1.2 and 8.15 Such masters and mistresses as would haue their necessarie affaires businesses dispatched well and in due time That which thou canst doe conueniently thy selfe commit it not to another may not alwaies trust to the doing thereof by their seruants but they must either see it done or rather dispatch it themselues if it be such a thing and businesse as they can and may well do For such a lowlines is alwaies ioyned with the feare of God that they that are humbled with religion though honourable and worshipfull in calling do not think thēselues too good to do any good thing Gen. 9.20 This vndoubtedly is a thing greatly to be wished for namely Masters ought to make good choise of their seruants that all christian masters and householders when they go about to hire any seruants that then they would be no lesse carefull and inquisitiue of their honestie godly cōuersation and how they haue profited in the knowledge of God his religion as they bee to inquire and know what they can do and what skill and cunning they haue in that Art or Science which they professe or els what qualities they haue and so doing no doubt they being carefull to hire religious and godly seruants their worke and businesses that such seruants shall take in hand the Lord will much better prosper giue good successe vnto then otherwise if they shall hire and entertaine irreligious and prophane seruants as may plainly appeare by the example of Iacob and Joseph two religious and faithfull seruants Gen. 30.26.27 c. and 29.2.3 4.5.6.23.23 Esay 6.6 It is a rare thing for a master to bring his seruant to be godly who is not godly himselfe whose masters and their substance was blessed increased and multiplied for their sakes As householders ought to haue care ouer the bodies of their seruants so much more ouer their soules One compareth the master of the house to the Seraphin which came and kindled the Prophets zeale so he should goe from wife to seruants and from seruants to children and kindle thē in the zeale of God longing to teach and vtter his knowledge as a Nurse to emptie her breasts It is lamentable to think how that al masters for the most part not only such as are prophane and ignorant themselues but also some that would bee counted great professors and would seeme to haue great knowledge yea and with griefe may it bee spoken some preachers also that haue had seruants dwelling with them 3. or 4. yeares or moe who as they were ignorant in the grounds principles of Christian religion when they came first into their seruice so they went from them as ignorant therein as they came and all for want of catechising being a principall dutie which not only Ministers but also al christian masters in conscience are boūd to performe to their families But of this matter I haue sufficiently intreated of in my last editiō of the Vse and necessitie of catechising and therfore I will of purpose here omit to speake of it Another saith that a master in his familie hath all the offices of Christ for hee must rule and teach and pray rule like a King Reuel 5.10 Act. 16.31.33 and 18.8 1. Cor. 1.16 Luke 22.32 and teach like a Prophet and pray like a Priest To shew how a godly man should behaue himselfe in his household when the holy Ghost speaketh of the conuersion of any house-keeper commonly he saith That the man beleeued with all his household As Peter being conuerted must cōuert his brethren so the master being a Protestant and a good christian must indeuour by al good meanes that his seruants may be such For therefore God said that he would not hide his counsell from Abraham because hee would teach his familie And surely al dutie of seruants Gen. 18.17.19 which is not done of conscience is but eye seruice and faileth at most need as Ziba betrayed his master when he should haue defended him 2. Sam. 16.1 2 3 4. Phil. 11.12.16 Therefore before Onesimus was cōuerted Paul said he was an vnprofitable seruant but when he was conuerted he calleth him more then a seruant because such a seruant is better then many seruants Gen. 2. Though Laban was wicked himselfe yet he reioyced that Iacob his seruant was godly because God blessed him the better for him Ioshua saith I and my household will serue the Lord Iosu 24.15 Shewing that masters should receiue none into their houses but whom they cā gouerne as Ioshua did and if any haue crept into their doores then they must put him forth againe for Dauid saith I will not suffer a lyar to stay in my house He saith not a swearer Psal 10.6.7 nor a theefe but a lyar as if he should say I will rid him out of my doores They must keepe no idle prophane superstitious nor disordered seruants in their house Act. 10.2 Luke 2.41 before he bee a swearer and a theefe for a lyar will grow to a swearer and a theefe in a day as a dicer groweth to a begger in a night Therefore it is noted of Cornelius that he himselfe feared God with all his household This is reported also of Ioseph and Mary
be partaker of the inheritance of the Saints in light and hath deliuered thee frō the power of darknes and hath translated thee into the kingdome of his deare sonne 2. Cor. ◠1 Rom. 13.12 Receiue not this grace in vaine but cast away the works of darknesse and put on the armour of light Be renued in thy heart and in thy spirit that it may appeare I haue bin carefull for thee Thus a carefull father seeketh to traine vp his sonne and to nurture him Now there bee some necessarie meanes and helpes whereby godly parents may the more effectually and vertuously bring vp their children according to the directions before spoken of as these First not to suffer their children and youth to haue their owne will For Salomon saith Prou. 11.20 They that are of a froward heart are abomination vnto the Lord. And againe in the 29. chapter vers 15. A childe set at libertie maketh his mother ashamed But what will some be readie to answere in this case Oh hee may be broken of that time enough afterwards But what saith the Wiseman Eccles 25.27 Giue no passage to the waters no not a little The heart of a childe is as the violent waters And as those which haue experience in keeping and repairing the sea bankes can easily tell vs that if the raging waues should be suffered to break ouer but one tide they should hardly in many daies recouer it againe so if thou sufferest thy childes affections to haue the full swinge and course yea but a small season thou shalt hardly or neuer againe winne this breach 2. The second meanes is moderation in diet not to pamper children with too much meate or that which is delicate but to giue thē that which is holesome and sufficient and no more For excesse breedeth diseases both in bodie and minde maketh them gluttons and drunkards consumers of patrimonie and this vice draweth a thousand more with it and euen as the fattest soyle bringeth foorth the rankest weedes so pampered children brought vp without due gouernment and discipline thrust forth the greatest and most ouergrowne vices 3. The third helpe is not to clothe them with costly apparell or to attire them with new fashions For this againe is contray to the nature of paines and labour and stirreth vp pride For euen as the soft flaxe soone catcheth holde on the fire so youthfull nature will soone bee inflamed with this vice as lamentable experience too much teacheth at this day For from whence commeth this disguised monstrous apparell but from wanton and dissolute education of youth This is the speciall sinne of England and if any thing bee the ouerthrow of it which God for his mercie turne away it will be this the land is too heauie of this sinne For the pride of al nations and the follies of al countries are vpon vs how should wee long beare them How art thou fallen from heauen Esa 14.12 Zeph. 1.8 ô Lucifer sonne of the morning And it shall be in the day of the Lords sacrifice that J wil visit the Princes and the Kings children and all such as are clothed with strange apparell 4. The fourth helpe is reprehension or chiding And this is taught Prou. 29.15 The rod and correction giue wisedome Where by the rod is vnderstood chastisement and by corrections is vnderstood chiding or reprehension The want of this helpe was the vtter spoile and vndoing of Adonijah as may be seene 1. King 1. 2. chapters And here we cannot but iustly finde fault with most parents who though they be somewhat carefull for their children while they be tender yet when they be come to some yeares of discretion as to fifteene or sixteene which time is most fit for reprehension because then by al reason it should soonest enter and which time againe is most dangerous because then our affections are most strong in vs oh then they be growne to mens and womens estate they may not be reprehended they may not be disgraced But know thou oh wise parent that so long as thou hast a childe so long thou art a parent and so long as thou art a father so long thou must carrie a fatherly authoritie and power ouer him 5. The fift helpe is chastisement and it may well be called a helpe because where reprehension will not serue that must helpe and this must bee vsed in order and method as the skilfull Phisition will not giue his strong and bitter pill before his preparatiue least the working of it should be hindered by the stubborne and indurate obstructions so the wise parent in curing his sonnes vices must not strike before he hath reprehended or preadmonished least either he bee too much cast downe and discouraged or waxe obstinate This kinde of phisicke as it is more strong then the former so it hath a more forcible and excellent working For great is the godlinesse in that seueritie by which the power of sinning is taken away And againe Salomon in the 22. of the Prouerbs vers 15. saith more worthily Foolishnes is bound in the hart of a childe but the rod of correction shall driue it away And againe in the 13. chapter vers 24. He which spareth the rod hateth his sonne that is he is an enemie vnto him Wherefore know thou this O thou father that when thou seest thy sonne dangerously sicke with the disease of sinne and doest not vse this helpe and remedie which God in his holie word hath prescribed vnto thee thou art accessarie to thy childes death as an enemie and his blood shall be required at thy hands because that where thou mightest haue saued him thou hast wilfullie cast him away For Gods loue good parents looke to your children Oh that parents had lesse naturall affection or more wisedome for euery parent is blind in his owne children Oh is it not a pittifull thing that parents should themselues make graues for their owne children and burie them quicke without all compassion and thinke they doe well in it And is it not a follie aboue al follies that while the parent layeth his hand vpon his childs mouth to keepe away the colde winde hee presseth it down so hard that he strangleth him therwith Thus many a father and mother in the world haue killed their deare ones by their inordinate loue and cockering of them and thus manie poore infants must still be murthered because parents will not be warned Parents are bound by the law of nature to loue their children for what a crueltie were it not to loue them that they haue gotten and borne But yet wisedome requireth that they somewhat dissemble and hide their loue especially to those children that bee of some reasonable discretion least they should take boldnes thereupon to doe what they list Genes 6.5 and 8.21 Matth. 15.19 For if we well consider of mans nature that it is euill euen from his birth we shall then finde the young childe which lieth in the cradle to