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A05336 A pleasant satyre or poesie wherein is discouered the Catholicon of Spayne, and the chiefe leaders of the League. Finelie fetcht ouer, and laide open in their colours. Newly turned out of French into English.; Satyre Ménippée. English. T. W. (Thomas Wilcox), 1549?-1608, attributed name.; Leroy, Pierre, Canon of Rouen.; T. W., fl. 1573-1595. 1595 (1595) STC 15489; ESTC S108539 162,266 208

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to our Lord the Pope and to the holy Apostolike sea and also to my most christian benefactor and most Catholike King of Spayne and of so many other kingdomes if you conserue the Dutchie of Britannia Armorica to his most famous daughter the infant and bestow the kingdome vpon some Prince of his familie whom she will choose for her husband and will vouchsafe worthie of the dowrie Crowne of France whollie to either of the competitors But of this poynt that most reuerend Cardinall of Pelue Elegantly spoken shall dispute vato you and for the residue shall supplie it for he knoweth better then me my selfe your businesses which for twentie yeares space as well Lotharingically as Spanishly he hath handled at Rome and that so subtilly and faithfully that he hath brought your matters to that poynt into which you see them now reduced Aske my fellow and I be a theese Wherefore when this godly Prelate and citizen did beleeue that his mother France was in the agonie of death and did draw the last breath he came lately to visite her as a good and a deuout confessor and the best cōpatriot to helpe you in the funerall or rather vulnerall pompe and exequies thereof But if you would choose some one seeking out of his benefactors of Lotharingie and Guisie surely you should do to him according to his heart and he would cheerefully annoynt and consecrate him with the oyle of the holie pot crewse or crewer which he hath at Reims expressely reserued and very wel kept vnder the custodie of S. Paule Duke of Campania and Rotelia looke you to it I by the expresse mandate of our Lord if you shall doe any thing in this matter against the lawes manners of this king do me or against the Councels of the Church And what not or against the Gospell and Decalogue specially according to the impression of heretikes doe promise you full absolution and indulgence and that freely for euer and euer Amen Alas for mee I did not remember to cause you to vnderstand a much and merueilous good newes which I haue receiued in haste from Rome by meanes of Zametto that is that his holines doth excommunicate charge accurse all Cardinals Archbishops Bishops Abbots Priests Friers which are politikes royall or fauouring the King how much Catholike soeuer they be And for to take away all differences and iealousnes betwixt the Spanyards and French the most holy father shall make But yet the Spaniards had it first that the French shall haue the kings euill aswell as the Spanyards shall become also as great brauaders or bragging fellowes bouggerers as they Moreouer he giueth full indulgence and pardon to all how great good Catholikes soeuer they be be they Lorraines or Spanyards or French men the which shall murther their fathers brethren cousins neighbours superiours royall Princes politike heretikes in this most christian warre during three hundred thousand yeares of true pardon A very good reason And doubt ye not that the holie spirit shall be wanting vnto you for the holie Consistorie will cause it to come downe from the armes of God the father at their pleasure or commaundement as ye knowe that hee hath denied these many yeares to create any Pope that hath not been an Italian or a Spanyard In fine I pray you for my sake make a King and I doe not care whosoeuer hee bee although hee were the diuell so that he bee a seruant and a feudatarie of his holines and of the Catholique King by whose meanes I stand and haue been made a Cardinall thankes to the good Duke of Parma for it This I will tell you that my voyce of choise shall willingly bee for the infant or daughter of Spayne More it is said thē she should for she is a valiant and worthie Ladie and much beloued of her father Neuertheles doe you that which shall please the Lord the Duke of Feria and Monsieur the Lieutenant But take you heed in the meane time how you opē your mouth to speake or reason of peace or of truce otherwise the holie Colledge will denie Christ himselfe I commend my selfe heartilie vnto you Againe I say vnto you farewell These words being finished little Launay heretofore made minister in the vniuersitie of Geneue and at this present the basest person of Sorbonne after that he had eaten vp the great breuiaries and heures of the late king to make banquets to Monsieur the Lieutenant fell vpon his knees with Garinus the Franciscan Frier and apostle apostata and assisted with Cuilly the Curat of S. Germain Lauxerrois and with Aubry the Curat of S. Andrew des Arts comming backe from shriuing Peter Barriere thundered out with a lowd voyce before Monsieur the Legats crosse O crosse all haile our onely hope in this time of the passion Some of the assemblie thought not well of it notwithstanding euery one followed them singing the same song and the stirre being ended the lot fell to Monsieur the Cardinall of Pelue to speake who lifting himselfe vp vpon his two feete like a goose after that he had made very deepe reuerence before Monsieur the Lieutenants seate he hauing put off his red had into his hood behind and afterwards making such another before Monsieur the Legate Great preparation to heare a goose hisse and last of all one most low of all the rest before the Dames or Ladies did in fine sit himselfe downe againe hauing coughed or sneezed three good times together and that not without auoyding of some phlegmatike matter which also prouoked euery one to do the like he began to speake after this manner directing his words to Monsieur the Lieutenant who three times sayd vnto him Couer a thousand or put on my master The Oration of Monsieur the Cardinall of Pelue MOnsieur Lieutenant you shall excuse me if to content this learned assemblie and to keepe decorum and the dignitie of the ranke or place that I holde in the Church by the prouidence of you yours Man setteth vp such mates I make some discourse in the Latin tongue in which you know that I haue a long time studied and knowe almost as much thereof as my grandfather A learned race who was a good souldier and a good farmor and that vnder Charles the eight But when I shall haue spoken three words I will then come to you and your affayres Wherefore I will now direct my selfe to you famous men Neuer word of this kind more true and the most picked out of all the filth and stinking dirt of France that I may make you to vnderstand many things which cannot sufficiētly enough bee expressed in the French language For it is most fit that wee chiefly that haue studied in the most famous vniuersitie of Paris High poynts doubtles and are more wittie then the tagge ragge of the people should haue some secret matters in vs that women should not vnderstand
I wil therefore that you know and yet let these things be spoken to godly eares alone that there hath gone out an edict or if you will rather a rescript from our Lord the Pope by which it is permitted vs to choose create sacrate and annoynt a new King what a one shall please you A shrewd limitation so that he be of the stocke of Austria or Guise You haue therefore to prouide a Prince of whether nation you will for of these Bourbonians there are no speeches nor words how much lesse of this heretike relapsed whom the same our Lord the Pope by the foresayd rescript affirmeth to bee euen now damned in hell A sober iudgement So it appeareth and that his soule shall shortly serue Lucifer for an afternoones beuer Indeede I am a Frenchman neither will I denie my countrie but if this choise might goe according to my liking verily for my good and the good of mine yea and for your good to I would willingly pray you that you would giue your voyces to some of the Lotharen familie whom you knowe to haue done so well in the Catholike common-wealth and Church of Rome But peraduenture my Lord Legate hath another intent Who doubteth of that to please the Spanyards but he speaketh not all the things hee hath in the ambrey or chest of his breast In the meane while hold you this firme An egge not more like an egge then this lewd fellow like the Legat. that you must at no hand speake or heare concerning making of peace with these damned politikes but rather arme your selues and prepare your selfe to suffer all extremities yea euen death famine fire and the ruine of the whole citie or kingdome For ye can doe nothing more gratefull and acceptable to God and to Philip our most Catholike King I know well enough that Luxenburgh and Cardinall Goudiu and the Marquis Pisanus are gone to Rome to prepare the minde of our Lord the Pope to heare the legation of this Biarnois treating of his conuersion But looke how safe the Moone is from the monkies or woolues Speake again and speake better if can be so much auerse is the heart of our Lord the Pope from such businesses Bee strong and secure euen as I so I bee within the Parisiens walles Verily I had prepared some good thing to say vnto you concerning the blessed Paul whose conuersion was yesterday celebrated because I did hope that yesterday it should bee my good happe to speake in my order But the ouer long oration of my Lord de Mania A right name if it be well vnderstood deceiued me and therefore I am constrained to put vp the sword of my good Latin into the sheath or scabberd which I would haue whet and sharpened against this conuersion concerning which sundrie politicians sowe I cannot tell what into the common people which notwithstanding I neither beleeue nor desire For blessed Paul did much differ from this Nauarre for he was noble a citizen of Rome that he was noble descended of a noble race appeareth by this that at Rome he had his head cut off Belike none be beheaded but noble personages But this fellowe is infamous for heresie and all the familie of the Bourbonians doth descend from a poultrer or if you had rather haue it so from a butcher that solde flesh in the butcherie of Parisijs as affirmeth a certaine Poet greatly a friend of the holie Apostolike sea and therfore because he would not lye Thou art iudged by thine owne mouth vnthriftie seruant Paul also was conuerted with a miracle but this not vnles some would say that he did by besieging inclose this citie about some foure moneths with sixe thousand men whilest there were within more then a hundred thousand and that this is a miracle that he tooke so many cities and strong holds without the subuersion of walles but by place without wayes by holes and straight caues that could scarcely bee pearced by one onely souldier Adde ye that Paul feared and was affected with great feare by lightning from heauen but this man is feareles neither is afrayd of any thing neither thunder nor lightning nor flashings nor showres nor winter and yee or heate no not our set battailes nor our armies so well surnished and ordered as they are More miracles yet which hee dare expect and come before with a handfull and small force and either ouerthrow them or put them to flight Let this swift and vnsleeping diuell perish ill which doth so labouriously wearie vs and letteth vs from sleeping as much as we list But this much concerning Paul least Policarpus whose feast is kept this daye may perhappes enuie whom yet I will pretermit Vnskilfull in vitas patrum because I haue foreseene or premeditated nothing concerning him I remember indeede when I was at Rome in the time of Pope Gregorie that I propounded in the Consistorie fiue protests or problemes to bee disputed of which all respected this most holie congregation concerning the choosing of a King of France For from that time wherein this dead Henry the fautor of heretikes spoyled mee of my Bishopricke of Senon and put my rents and benefices which I had in his kingdome in in his owne hand and purse I alwayes had a minde and intention of reuenging myselfe A holy prelate ouercome euill with well doing and did all that I could and will doe for euer though I should giue my soule to the diuell that this most notable iniurie might fall vpon the head of all the French that suffered it neither did oppose themselues against my sname opprobrie which when I had often protested I did at the last effectuall and you knew well what to say A notable beholder of formes and a singular flatterer But these men Princes and these women the famous pearles and meruailous genis of all the world call me else whether to whom both men and women now the matter requireth that I should speake as also to the rest of the troupe of deputies deputing for whom it is behouefull that they should vnderstand mee disputing and reasoning in the French tongue which I haue almost vnlearned to speake I haue so greatly forgotten mine owne countrie Then I will returne to you Monsieur the Lieutenant and I will tell you that if I had found in France the affayres to haue passed according to the practises and intelligēces which I haue managed for these fiue and twentie yeares space with the Spanyards at Rome A good Frēch man I should now see the late Monsieur your brother in this royall throane and wee might haue occasion to sing with that good Patriarch Nunc dimittis But sith that this was not the will of God that it should be so patience perforce he goeth farre enough that passeth beyond fortune Yet by the way I will tell you Fie for shame that you will sweare by such
which may fall out vnto you for this fact But Gods word must needes be false and ful of lying which it is not nor cānot be if you do not very quickly receiue the wages hire that God promiseth to manquellers and murtherers as your brother did for hauing slaine the late Admirall But I will leaue this matter to the diuines to treate hereof that so I may come to put you in minde of a great and stale faulte which you committed at the very same time For sith you feared not in so many places to declare that your speciall marke was to raigne and be a King you had then and by reason of the blow a good occasion offered you to cause your selfe to be chosen King and you might better then haue attayned thereto than you can at this present when you sue Many deuises are in mans heart but the Lords purposes shall stand for euer ride runne corrupt and all to get it The Cardinall of Bourbon to whom vnaduisedly you gaue the title of the King was a prisoner Your nephew vpon whome they did bestowe all the commendations and glorie of his father was so likewise and neither the one nor the other could hurte you therein or hinder you as your nephew doth at this day you had yet the people hartned earnest and running after noueltie and change who had a great opinion of your valour from which you are much fallen since and I make no doubt but that you had caried it away thorow the hatred of the lawfull successor who was notoriouslie knowne to be a Huguenot And besides you had diuers preachers who had laide out a thousand reasons to perswade the people that the Crowne did belong rather to you than to him Nay foule and false The occasion for it was faire namely the changing of it from one line to another And although it bee all but one familie and of the same stalke as we may say notwithstāding the distāce of more than ten degrees in which the doctors say there ceaseth all the bond and right of consanguinitie made a goodly shew although that Doctor Baldus hath written that this rule faileth in the familie of the Bourbonians Wherunto adde that you had the force and the fauour of the time in your hand wherewith you could not serue your owne turne or helpe your selfe but rather thorough a certaine fainthartednes and very foule and grosse cowardise you would obserue forsooth some little modestie and forme of the ciuill lawe giuing the title of the King to a poore priest that was a prisoner The Cardinall of Bourbon although that in all other things you did shameleslie violate all the lawes of the realme and all lawe besides of God and of man whether it were naturall or ciuill You forgot all the maximaes and rules of our great masters touching the matter of enterprise vpon the estates of an other man euen that of Iulius Caesar which oftentimes for his excuse and defence spake these verses out of a certaine Greeke Poet. If that thou must needes wicked be be so a kingdome to obtaine But yet in other things be iust and eke the lawes maintaine You were afraide to take the title of a King Stumble at a straw and leap ouer a blocke and yet you were not afraide to vsurpe the power of it which you disguised and masked with a qualitie or esstate altogether new such a one as was neuer heard spoken of in Fraunce And I knowe not who was the author thereof yet some attribute it to the president Brisson or to Ianiu But whosoeuer inuented this expedient fayled in the termes of Grammer and of Estate also A fitte and good reason They might haue giuen you the name of Regent or of Lieutenant generall of the King as they haue done sometimes heretofore when the Kings were prisoners or absent off their kingdome and realme But Lieutenant of the estate and Crowne is a title vnheard of very strange which also hath too lōg a taile as it were a chimer or mōster against nature that maketh little children afraid Whosoeuer is a Lieutenant is Lieutenant to another whose place he holdeth who is not able to do his functiō or office by reason of his absence or some other hinderance or let and a Lieutenant is the Lieutenant of some other mā but to say that a man should be the Lieutenāt of a thing without life as the estate or crowne of a King is a very absurd thing such a one as cannot be mainteined And it had bin more tolerable to say Lieutenant in the estate and crowne of France than Lieutenāt of the estate But this is but a smal matter to faile in speech or words A true assertion in cōparison of failing in deeds When you were clothed and cloaked with this goodly qualitie you did so rudely roughly empty our purses that you had the meane to raise vp a great armie with the which you promised to pursue besiege take and bring prisoner He that reckoneth without his host must count againe this nowe successor to the crowne who did not call himself Lieutenant but in plaine termes King You had made vs then to gard and keep our places to hire shops in S. Anthonies street that we might see him passe in chaines whē ye brought him prisoner from Diepe what did yee withal this great armie very groffe indeed by al your strāge succours of Italie of Spaine of Germanie The horse and man are prepared against the day of battell but victorie is from the Lord. but to lay opē and cause to be knowne your own reachles weaknes vnorderly gouernment not so much as once daring with thirtie thousand mē to set vpon fiue or sixe thousand which gaue you the head at Arques and in the end constrained you shamefully to turne your backs you your selues to seeke surety safety in the riuer of Somme We were greatly deceiued when in steede of seeing this new King in the Bastile wee beheld him in our suburbs with his armie as a certaine lightning or clap of warre that preuented our thoughts yours also But you came and succoured vs A needlesse worke then when we were assured that he would do vs no hurt And we must confesse that without the resistance that one who is at this day his seruant made against him at the gate of Bussy he had taken vs before you arriued From that time hitherto you haue done nothing in your Lieutenancy worthy the remembrance If this be his commendation praise him for tyrannic but the establishment of your councell of fourtie persons and of sixteene which you haue since reuoked and scattered as much as you could And whilest that you laboured the aduancement and estate of your owne house and that you suffered your imagined King to wast weare away in prison without succouring him either with mony or with meanes to maintaine