brethren even with this true sincere and free love that they may for ever and ever enjoy that true and free Love of God which shall make them for ever free from all miseries and pains and of all pleasures and joys enjoying him who enjoyeth all things in himself from himself with whom is all joy unspeakable joy fulness of joy and at whose right hand are pleasures for evermore 199. Thus blessed and for ever blessed are all those that have this blessed Spirit of God for their Portion on Earth which shall lead them as the Sons of God unto God their Father and their Portion in Heaven who is the Portion the Father and the everlasting Rest of all the blessed 200. Ah blessed condition to be thus blessed by the Spirit of God yea by the God of all Spirits having hearts so full of true love and charity as to long labour and desire to have all others thus blessed with themselves and as themselves that are so full of the Love of God as to love all others as they love themselves and would have all beloved by him Ah holy Father increase this thy love in the hearts of all thy Children and Servants here on earth that we may together go hand in hand witnessing that the love wherewith we love one another is from thy Love and that we live in thee and thou in us who art all Love even the God of Love and that it is from thy Love and the living of thy holy and blessed Spirit in us that we thus love or love thus 201. Ah Lord God for thine own great glorious and holy names sake take not this thy Holy Spirit the Comforter from me but let it ever abide and dwell in me that I may always go forth before thee rejoycing as the Bride rejoyceth in her Bridegroom for thou O Lord knowest my many weaknesses and imperfections and that I cannot do any thing well pleasing unto thee without the assistance of this thy Holy Spirit for that my heart is all evil only evil and continually evil leave me therefore O Lord this thine holy and blessed Spirit the Sanctifier and the Comforter that I may be ever led in the ways of all truth and holyness which may conduct me unto thy dwelling place which is all peace rest holiness blessedness and eternal life and happyness 202. Here followeth a short Admonition Exhortation or advice unto all careless sinners that prize not this life or living of Gods holy Spirit in them that they would no longer quench its motions but come out of their sins and taste and see how gracious the Lord is 203. Ah poor most poor and most miserable man for thou thou only art truly miserably poor that art Christless though thou aboundest in Corn Wine and Oyl though thou farest delicately every day and art arraied with Purple Scarlet and fine linnen though thou feedest on the delicacies of Egypt and enjoyest all this Worlds good the honours riches and pleasures thereof though thou lyest on the beds of Ivory and hast thy Palaces bedeckt with the Gold of Ophir and the precious Pearls and Diamonds of the Orient though Princes should be thy Servants and Kings Daughters thy Maidens yet remember for all this thou shalt dye and come to Judgment thine honour and thy riches shall not save thee but in the day of thy distress they shall take themselves wings and fly away from thee miserable comforters are all such comforts Ah put not put not thy trust then on such things as in a moment ere thou art aware shall be taken from thee or thou from them 204. Awake awake from the dead thou careless man why sleepest thou arise and Christ shall give thee light and life why Ah why wilt thou be so obstinate as thus wittingly knowingly and wilfully to neglect so great Salvation and be thus idle all the day long dost thou not know that the night is coming wherein no man shall work and the day when thou shalt say thou hast no pleasure in them Remember Ah remember thou that sleepest in security that drinkest in iniquity as water and vanity as with cart-ropes that sayest to thy Soul eat drink and take thy fill of pleasures and to morrow shall be as this day Ah thou fool when wilt thou be wise may not thy Soul this night be taken from thee whose then shall those things be and what Ah what shall become of all those thy vain pleasures and delights thou canst not carry any of them with thee but as thou camest into the World naked so thou shalt naked return from earth thou cam'st and to earth thou shalt again return thine honour shall not go down into the Pit with thee nor thy mony neither 205. Deceive not then Ah deceive not then thy self any longer with those vain things which are not that is they are not what they seem to be what they promise to be nor what we take them to be Serve no longer Ah be thou perswaded to serve no longer Devils lusts Worlds lusts or self lusts but serve Ah serve the Lord Jesus Christ in sincerity and truth with full purpose of heart and endeavours of life that he may be still and still unto thee thy God and thy guide thy Sun and thy Shield thy peace and thy portion in the land of the living Neglect Ah neglect no longer nor put off no longer so sweet so certain and so great Salvation as those that are with God enjoy 206. Cast not Ah cast not his holy and divine Commandments behind thy back any more and trample not his precepts under thy feet and turn not his grace of love and mercy into wantonness Quench not Ah quench not the motions of his holy spirit by which thou art sealed unto the day of redemption but open quickly yea set quickly wide open the door of thy heart and let him in lest he depart from thee and swear in his wrath that thou shalt never enter into his rest and say unto thee as he did unto Jerusalem seeing that thou wouldst not be gathered unto me all my mercies shall be for ever hid from thine eyes and seeing that he would not that I should reign over him come slay him before me Ah who then who then shall be able to deliver thee from the wrath of the Lamb who is the Lyon of the Tribe of Judah he will tear he will tear thee in pieces in his anger and break thee even as a Potters Vessel is broken for none shall be able to deliver thee out of his hands nay all shall be against thee good and bad Angels Saints and sinners vea thine own self shall have indignation against thy self thine own eyes shall look evilly on thee thine own hands shall tear thee in pieces thine own thine own feet shall carry thee to the place of execution thine own thine own Conscience shall accuse and condemn thee and justifie Gods Righteous dealing towards thee thus thus shalt thou be there
ravishing joyes that God hath prepared and laid up for all those that truly love him I intend not to speak any thing touching thâ— method nor to crave the excuse of any for any thing that may not savour with them I know from whom I have received it and he I am sure will patronize and protect it and bless it in some measure I hope unto all that shall read it but whatever success it find I shall find I am sure all that I seek for which is peace within during this life and honour glory and immortality in the World to come which good Lord grant for Christ his sake unto all those that love thee anâ— wait for thine appearing And thus dear hearts I leave you to the guidance of the gooâ— Spirit of the Lord to direct you in all your thoughts and words that they and all your actions as well as mine may be now and always acceptable in his sight who is our Strength anâ— our Redeemer to him who is able to keep you from the hour of Temptation and to preservâ— you blameless unto the hour of his coming commit and commend you remaining In London Anno 1654. IN the Name of the most Holy Glorious and blessed Trinity God the Father God the Son and God the Holy Ghost one God blessed for ever to whom be given and ascribed as all due is and to none else Honour Glory Power Might Majesty Dominion and Thanksgiving by me and by the whole world of his Elect Now and for Evermore Amen Amen So be it Lord so be it THomas Arundell the poorest vilest basest and unworthiest of all the servants of the living God altogether unworthy of that most Worthy Glorious and right Honourable Title but trusting on his mercy and free Grace to be made worthy through the merits and worthiness of Jesus Christ and in him to be accounted worthy Doth in all humility of heart most humbly beg and implore his Divine Majesty in Jesus Christ to inspire bless and assist him with his holy Spirit that he may here following set down only the sincere breathings and longings of his soul in truth and sincerity of heart and that he may grow daily from one degree of grace unto another from step to step untill he come to that height and fulness of measure of holiness appointed by God in Jesus Christ who is the Fountain the Ocean and the fulness of all Happiness and Blessedness being God equal with the Father Blessed for ever and ever A Prayer O Most Holy most Glorious Eternal incomprehensible Lord God full of Grace and Truth Maker and Giver of all things both in Heaven and in Earth from all Eternity unto all Eternity thou art and there is none besides thee God blessed for ever and ever Thou givest O Lord freely fully and continually and art never weary nor repentest all our springs are in thee and from thee thou canst not increase nor diminish whatever is done for or against thee Ah Lord my God give me so much of thy self as I may be like unto thee in all things by grace here and in glory hereafter that I may stedfastly faithfully heedfully carefully and circumspectly do thy whole and holy will on earth until I come to glorifie thy Name in Heaven O Lord conform my will unto thy most holy and most blessed will that I may serve and please thee by all my thoughts words and actions not turning aside to the right hand of pleasures or to the left hand of profits Let thy most holy and most blessed Spirit teach me lead me guide me and so direct and govern me that the thoughts of my heart the words of my mouth and the works of my hands may be now and always acceptable in thy sight O Lord my Strength and my Redeemer O Lord that searchest all hearts and triest the Reins pondering all our actions be pleased in Jesus Christ to look down upon me poor vile sinfull dust and ashes the greatest of sinners and the very worst of the worst of men and for his sake wash away all my iniquities and purge me from all my sins and my transgressions known or unknown secret or revealed past present and to come and for the merits of that most dear and pretious bloud of thy dear and only Son which was I believe shed for me on the Cross O Lord grant that I may appear blameless and spotless before thy Throne of Grace and Justice at all times when I come before thee that thou mayest have delight in me and in all the works of my hands and mayest according to thy good promise graciously hear and answer my petitions and requests which I most humbly and unfeignedly desire may be framed in my heart by thy holy Spirit that they may be according to thy holy mind and will and find acceptation through the mediation and merits of thy dear only and beloved Son Jesus Christ the Righteous And grant O most mercifull and loving Father in Jesus Christ my Redeemer that I may set down from time to time the only Dictates of thy holy and most blessed Spirit unto my poor Soul not any head-notions but my very hearts frame and only desires and motions that they may both then and ever after refresh rejoyce glad and comfort me and cause me to bring forth fruit to newness and amendment of Life for the honour and glory of thy great Name and grant that I may ever renounce all merit or worthiness in my self for the very least of all thy mercies even for the crumbs that fall by thy providence from the Childrens Table Sure I am the more light I have from thee O Lord my God I shall the better and clearer see my own darkness the more I have of thy wisdom the better I shall see the foolishness of all worldly wisdom and the errours of my own ways the more I have of thee the less I shall have of my self the more thou shalt be pleased to give me the less I shall confess I deserve and the more thou shalt be pleased to lift me up the lower I will cast my self down Ah Lord God teach me to know my self that I may hate my self teach me to know thee rightly not in the History only but in the mystery also not only without but also within that I may love thee in fear and fear thee with true unfeigned sincere spotless love wean me O Lord from the World and the World's loves let me dye to the World and to all things in it that I may live to thee Ah take me from the world ere thou takest the world from me fit me for thy self ere thou takest me to thy self let my last days be my best days and my last thoughts my best thoughts let me not live one moment longer than to do thee service and let that only be my aim and my end let thy work be my wages and thy wages my work O Lord God in Jesus Christ I most humbly
beseech thee to perfect and accomplish that good work which thou hast begun in me for all my hope trust and confidence is in thee that thou wilt never leave me nor forsake me Ah Lord do not leave me to my self at any time for I shall undo in one moment all thy doings so great is my skill power strength mind and will to all evil against all good But O my God do thou continue to restrain my will and constrain it to thy will and to the faithfull and entire obedience of all thy Laws and divine Commandments Write thy Laws of grace in my heart and thy Statutes in my mind by the finger of thy holy Spirit and suffer me never through any temptation to depart from them but let them be a lanthorn to my feet and a light unto my paths to lead guide direct and govern me in the ways of righteousness and holiness that I may live the life of the righteous in the midst of this crooked froward and perverse generation Ah Lord suffer not the mountains of my sins nor the Rocks of unbelief to hinder thy mercies from descending into my Heart by thy holy Spirit nor my Prayers from ascending up unto thee by faith Let thy mercies draw me and thy judgements drive me that I may run and not grow weary that I may walk and not faint Be O Lord my God I most humbly beseech thee in Jesus Christ a savour of life unto life to my Soul and of death unto death to my sins and let thy holy and most blessed Spirit of grace that knoweth thy whole holy and sacred mind and will lead me teach me direct me and instruct me in all the things I shall take in hand to do and give me O Lord I beseech thee those things and those things only that may draw me nearer and nearer unto thy self to make me thine and only thine that I may be wholly thine holy thine always thine and ever thine that living here in thy fear I may dye in thy favour and after death be made partaker of Eternal Life through Jesus Christ my blessed and alone Saviour and Redeemer for whom I desire ever to bless thee as the Lord my Righteousness and to whom with thy glorious holy and sacred Majesty thy eternal and blessed Spirit of grace be given and ascribed by me and all thine as all due is Honour Glory Power Might Majesty Dominion and Thanksgiving Now and for Evermore Amen HEre follow my spiritual Soul-solaces Dictates or Gleanings of God's Spirit set down in order and from time to time as it shall please the Lord in his goodness love and mercy to frame and fit my heart unto With a Journal of several passages as shall hereafter befall me by Providence whereby I may as in a heavenly Looking-glass see know taste feel and be certainly assured of God's loving and mercifull dealing towards me and of my daily approach and bringing nearer and nearer unto my â—long wished and desired home of Heaven through and by the merits of my dear Saviour and Redeemer Jesus Christ there to sing for ever and ever Hallelujahs of Praise Glory and Thanksgiving unto his most Holy Blessed Eternal and Glorious Name Let O Lord the Meditations of my heart the Words of my mouth and the Works of my hands be ever acceptable in thy sight who art my Strength and my Redeemer SPIRITUAL MEDITATIONS Being the Gifts and Dictates of GOD's SPIRIT OR The Hearts Frame and Language that desires to be made Spiritual and to live spiritually 1. O God my God who art all things and givest all things freely willingly abundantly and continually therefore of thee in Jesus Christ do I humbly ask all things 2. Give me thy self O God and I will confess that I have all those things I ask 3. For unless thou givest me thy self I esteem that I have nothing though thou keepest nothing else from me 4. I know that there is no perfect perfection here and therefore we cannot live without sin but O most gracious and most mercifull Father lay them not to my charge but bury them all past present and to come in the grave of my blessed Saviour and Redeemer Jesus Christ 5. I will ever seek thee O God whom my soul loveth desire thee only and lay hold and depend on thee alone 6. Let O God the things of the world be unto me as I was unto thee whilst I was in the world out of thee even as a menstruous cloth and filthy rags 7. Thy mercies O God are the hid Treasures which my heart seeketh and longeth to enjoy 8. Thy love O Christ is much sweeter to my taste than the hony-comb and I desire it much more than gold yea above all the worlds treasure good and glory 9. I am sure I shall be able to rejoyce in and under any yea all afflictions if thou dost not afflict me O my God and my Father in Jesus Christ with thy absence 10. He is in heaven though on earth that doth truly love thee and only love thee and heaven is in him because thy love is in him because thou lovest him thy love O God being the Heaven of Heaven in Heaven the best of Heaven 11. Do unto me O God what thou wilt and do but only tell me that thou wilt it 12. Were I in hell for thy sake that is absent from thee I could and would rejoyce â—or it is my Heaven to please thee my God who hast and dost so much delight me 13. Let me be but esteemed in thy eyes Oh my Jesus my sweet my dear and preâ—ious dear delight and I shall not value â—ut contemn all the ill looks of all others eyes 14. I had much rather be a Paul a Job or a Lazarus than a Solomon be ignominious all my days and honour my God always than be honourable all my days and dishonour my God but one day 15. Of all afflictions O God my God let not sin be my affliction afflict me not with sin for sin 16. A wounded heart a heart wounded with sin who can bear 17. What burthen so intolerably heavy as the burthen of one sin only if the Lord lift it not up with one of his fingers 18. I ask nothing in Heaven or Earth but God in Christ 19. God in Christ is all things for all things out of Christ are to me nothing he is my joy and my Salvation 20. I had much rather methinks be ever afflicted than never afflicted whilst on earth 21. Though by thy free grace O God thou hast in love and mercy brought me home unto thee yet thou hast used affliction as the means therefore do I love and k 〈…〉 the Rod because thou hast appointed it 22. I love affliction because it was the hand by which thou did'st O God leaâ— me out of affliction that is out of sin 23. I love affliction because by it thou hast taught me to love thee yea so to love thee as I love
nothing in comparison oâ— thee but all things in subordination to thee 24. I love affliction because in it I saw thee in me and my self in thee 25. I love affliction because by it I saw that thou didst love me 26. I love affliction because it taught me to love thy Statutes to choose them imbrace them and delight in them 27. And I will love affliction because it will keep me in the ways of thy Statutes 28. I love afflictions because they are lovely and sent from thee the God of Love to me in Love 29. I love afflictions because thou hast sanctified them to me and me by them 30. I love affliction because since that I was deeply afflicted for sins I have not been afflicted with sins triumph nor with reign 31. I love afflictions because thou hast made them O God unto me lovely 32. I love afflictions because thou hast ever sweetned them unto me by Sanctification 33. I love afflictions because by them â—hou hast taught me how to bear afflictions 34. I love afflictions because by them â—hou hast taught me how to afflict my self â—hat is my flesh for sins afflictions 35. O my God give me what afflictions â—hou wilt so by them thou suffer me not to â—fflict thee who I know never took'st pleasure to afflict me 36. If I had not known afflictions meâ—hinks I had never sought to learn to know â—hee nor thy knowledge 37. If I had not been undone I may justly â—ear I had been for ever undone 38. Give me O Lord as many sanctified afflictions as thou pleasest for then in the midst of them I am sure I shall please thee 39. O Lord suffer not any affliction to afflict me with murmurings or repinings which I am sure will afflict thee 40. I desire ever to praise thee O Lord â—or that I never had affliction in the flesh to â—y remembrance but it brought me comâ—ort in the Spirit 41. So that I may say through grace â—y afflictions have been my best and choicest â—enedictions 42. So esteeming them give me O Lord his grace to esteem them as tokens and â—gns of grace 43. O Lord make me ever thankfull fâ—â— all these thy afflictions which deserve much thanks 44. O Lord I heartily thank thee for thâ— thou hast made my heart such as it do truly thank thee for them 45. Give me grace O Lord to will thâ— Will and to submit to all thy Wills will 46. Ah Lord give me grace to knoâ— thy Will a will to learn to know thy gracâ— 47. Thy glory is my glories end thâ— end is my glories aim 48. I desire no other honour O Lord than to have the honour to be thy Servant 49. I will rejoyce in any Condition sâ— may be in the Condition of thy Servant 50. O Lord I am willing to do any woâ—â— so it may be thy work 51. Thy glory O Lord is my only loâ—ing my only joy delight desire aim and enâ— 52. O Lord let me never be ashamed do thy work though never so mean in eyes of Men let it be always beautifâ— honourable and glorious to my eyes heâ— will and affections 53. Give me Christ O God on any terâ— and conditions and I will confess them be honourable terms and conditions advâ—tagious and glorious 54. I had much rather haye Communâ— with Christ in a Dungeon than be adorned and ever possess all Solomon's outward glory in a Palace 55. Communion with Christ will I am sure make me content in all places and conditions 56. In Christ I am sure there is fulness of joy and all true peace and comfort though without any of all the worlds comforts 57. In Christ there is all pleasure though in the World frowns disgrace and displeasures 58. In Christ there is true light though in the World dark Dungeons 59. Thy smiles O Christ my Christ are my Heaven and thy frowns let me never know for I fear them as the worst of Hell 60. Let me enjoy that Heaven and I care not for all other Hells 61. Ah sweet Jesus let thy will be my will that my will may be always according to thy will 62. Let nothing O Lord satisfie me but my assurance of being in thee and thou in me 63. Let me always O Lord meditate on thy love and mercies in loving me 64. Ah suffer not any thing in this world of this world to content or delight me unless thou be in it my sweet Jesus 65. O Lord grant that as often as I do sin I may sigh and sorrow for sin and earnestly desire to sin no more 66. Grant that I may set all my affectionâ— and love on thee my dear Saviour and Soveraign Lord who art the Father's Glory the Heaven of Heaven in Heaven 67. Grant O Lord who art my God and all my good that in all Conditions may abundantly rejoyce with true contentment and not at all to murmur or repine aâ— thy hand though heavy on me 68. Ah Lord be thou always all my thoughts all my joy and the only and alâ— the rejoycing of my heart 69. Grant that I may always love thee O my Lord more than my Life yea thaâ— the life that is the Salvation of my Soul 70. Grant O Lord that I may not so much by much labour for the joys oâ— Heaven to my self as to do thy will or earth in love only to thy self 71. Grant O Lord that all my solacâ— may be in uprightness of heart to serve thee 72. O Lord give me grace that whilst am on Earth I may labour to do thy will with my whole will as it is done in Heaven 73. Grant O Lord that I may every day yea all the day long have Communion with thee the Spirit of Grace my sole comforteâ— and only comfort 74. Grant that I may will nothing but thâ— will O thou my Father in Jesus Christ which art in Heaven 75. I had rather have thy smiles in Hell my sweet and dear Jesus if it could be â—en thy frowns in Heaven 76. I had much rather if it could be be Hell and obey God then in Heaven and against him 77. O God give me I most humbly beâ—ech thee for Jesus Christ his sake those â—ings and those things only both for soul â—d body on earth that may prepare me â—d make me fittest for Heaven 78. I had much rather choose death â—en choose to sin 79. Though I cannot live without sin â—re yet whilst I live here suffer me not O â—od at any time to consent unto sin 80. I do believe that Christ Jesus is my Jeâ—â—s and my Christ and that he makes interâ—ssion for me every moment and ever will â—en to my very last moment 81. I had much rather enjoy affliction â—ith enjoying thee O my Saviour then all â—anner of prosperity if thou do'st not prosâ—r it 82. As long O God as thou givest me â—ead water and grace I will acknowledge â—t I have sufficient meat drink and rayâ—ent yea
joy of enjoying that true Communion with the true God though here on earth me thinks I am not on earth but in Heaven and yet I know all this is but an earthly Heaven though a Heaven 102. But how then Ah how then doth my heart rejoyce with joy unspeakable knowing that the time will come and is ever near at hand when I shall ever enjoy Heavens true joys which is God himself the joy of all joys yea all joys that are true 103. O Lord thou knowest that the Heaven which my soul desireth on earth is to do thy whole holy and blessed will on earth as it is done in Heaven 104. I desire to live O God and give my heart unto thee That hast in love and mercy given thine own unto me 105. Ah Lord my God let me so hear thy blessed most blessed voyce that my soul may live and so live as to praise thee for to praise thee is to live yea to live in thee and for thee which to do is the desire I have to live 106. Give me then power O God that hast all power in thy self that I may fight powerfully against all my powerfull Enemies and by the power of thy might which is an Almighty power I may tread and trample all their powers under my feet 107. Give me O Lord give me such fear as may cause me to love thee and such love as to fear thee and to cast out all fear 108. Meditation is the heart of the heart the soul of the soul which is the strength and life of all devotion 109. When in meditation God hath spoken peace unto thy soul Ah then do thou by thanksgiving with thy heart praise laud and him extol 110. He that will have Heaven on earth must meditate on Earth of Heaven 111. To have God abide with us we must by meditation abide with him 112. To have God live in us we must with full purpose of heart and endeavours of life live to him 113. To have God dwell in us we must open our affections which is the door of our hearts to let him into our hearts and continually feast him with true and unfeigned love loving none but him in comparison of him 114. To have God love us we must love him that is make him our choice above and beyond all other things choosing him for our chief and superiour good that is beyond above and more than all other things he must have all our hearts that is our hearts more than all other things 115. To have God delight in us our Delight End and Aim must be to delight him that is by walking well-pleasing unto him all the days of our whole lives as Christ did yesterday to day and for ever 116. To have God direct us how we shall walk we must be carefull and heedfull to walk as he doth and shall direct us 117. To have God preserve us we must believe in him trust on him depend and rowle our selves upon him 118. To have God maintain us we must cast all our care upon him for the earth is his and the fulness thereof 119. To have God sustain us and be our help we must hope only in him for he will fail us never and not put any trust in Princes or in the Sons of Men for in them there is no help their breath goeth forth they return to the earth in that very day his thoughts perish 120. To have God be all ours we must be all his that is in thought word and deed and not think our own thoughts or speak our own words nor do our own works but do all to the praise of his holy holy holy name 121. He that would live with the Lord in Heaven must live to the Lord on earth 122. He that would have the Lord to be his Lord and his God must serve honour and obey him as his Lord and fear worship and adore him as his God 123. He that would reign with the Lord Christ in Heaven must be contented to be arraigned for him as he was for us on earth 124. He that would sit with him there in glory above must be content to sit with him that is as he did in contempt here below 125. He that would rejoyce with him there must be contented to sigh and grieve and weep and mourn as he did here 126. He that would have all things with him there must be content if he will so have it to have as he had nothing here 127. He that would be received by God his Father there as by his Father must do his will as Christ did here that is as his Son 128. He that would wear an incorruptible Crown of glory for ever there must be content if he will so have it to wear a Crown of Thorns as he did here 129. He that would have an Eternal weight of glory there must be content and rejoyce under Eternal ignominy here 130. He that would have all things with others there must be willing to do all things for others here 131. He that would have Christ for his Jesus there to save him must believe in him as his Jesus Christ here that is as the way the truth and the life unto Eternal life 132. He that would have him there his advocate to plead his sinfull bad case must here plead for and in behalf of his blessed good case 133. He that would have him as a judge to acquit him there must judge and condemn himself here 134. And he that would not be condemn'd with the world there must not with the world and as the world doth live here 135. And he that would not be cast out with Reprobates there must have no Communication or Conversation with them here 136. And he that would not be of the number of the Devils Goats there must come unto Christ's flock and be of his Fold and of his Sheep here 137. And he that would live with the Righteous there must labour after Holiness and Righteousness here 138. And he that would be sure to dye their death to put it out of all doubt must live their life 139. And he that would enter into his Masters and Lords joy there must be the joy of his Lord and Master here that is his well-doing good and faithfull Servant 140. Seeing then that these things O Lord shall surely be make me through grace such a Person as I ought to be 141. Now seeing that holiness is Heaven and Heaven is holiness Ah Lord make me all holy that I may be all Heavenly let holiness always dwell within me that Heaven may be always within me and that I may be always in Heaven 142. And seeing O Lord that our desire chiefly to be in Heaven is to be free from all sin and to be holy as thou art holy Ah let me labour for and long after holiness on earth yea and to be so holy that though I am on earth I may be also in Heaven and Heaven
â—d go not out of me never for when I â—ve thee Lord I have all that I desire â—d crave 175. I am most willing and ready to â—se my life to preserve thee O Lord but â—t to preserve my life to lose thee 176. O Lord what thou hast given me â—hich is all take when thou wilt and in â—hat manner thou wilt 177. Make O Lord thine own Conditions â—ith me I will make none with thee but â— obey thee and serve thee on thine own â—rms 178. Teach me O Lord to know my â—lf as thou knowest me and to hate my â—lf for Sin as thou lovedst me when I was â— my Sin 179. I desire to hate Sin as the Devil to â—ar Sin as Hell and to fly from Sin as from â—y wrath O great God 180. With thee I desire to leave and give â—y self O sweet Jesus receive me and acâ—ept of me 181 O Lord go with me where I anâ— go thaâ— I mâ—y be always with thee nâ— from â—hee nor do any thing without thâ— 182. O Lord let me only do what tâ— consentest unto 183. I fear Sin much more then the thor of Sin 184. Sin is my worst my greatest my strongest Enemy 185. Give me Grace and strength sweet Jesus to conquer Sin and I shall fear all other Enemies 186. Had I but one sin unforgiven thou should'st O Lord make me my â— Judge I should and could not do otâ— wise then condemn my self for ever â— Hell 187. I desire ever to magnifie laâ— praise and extol thy glorious name O Lâ— God for making Jesus Christ my Judgâ— whom thou hast appointed also to be my 〈…〉 vocate 188. Were I to choose I would choâ— no other for both 189. For sure I am I cannot lose â— cause if he plead it nor be condemn'd judging me who was judged and coâ—demn'd for me 190. He dyed for me and therefore shall not see that death 191. He hath paid my ransome and thereâ—re I must be acquitted 192. He hath suffered and therefore I all ever raign 193. He wore a Crown of Thorns that might ever wear a Crown of an Eternal â—d incomprehensible weight of Glory 194. He is risen and hath led Captivity â—aptive that I might be delivered for ever â—t of all Captivity 195. He is ascended up on high and â—erefore I am sure he will lift me up unto â—m 196. He is gone to prepare a place for â—e therefore I am sure I shall be for ever â—ell plac'd 197. He is sate down on the right hand â—f God and hath convinc'd and conquer'd â—ll my accusers and enemies therefore I â—hall in quiet rest and perfect peace sit â—own with him and by him 198. He hath all power and Authority â—iven him by God therefore I am sure no â—ower shall or can hurt me 199. He hath provided a place for all his Children and Servants therefore I will not â—e afraid nor fear 200. He hath promised and he is faithfull therefore I will believe and not doubt but rejoyce 201. O Lord let me fear nothing but â— nor love nothing but thy â—ear 202. My love O Lord to thee is suâ— thy love to me 203. O Lord put the vail of thy feaâ— fore my eyes and my heart that I â— not sin against thee by neither 204. Ah Lord God suffer me nâ— more to doubt of thy love seeing thou â— so freely and willingly given the Son of love even thy dear only eldest natuâ— and beloved Son Jesus Christ to dye me and in my place and stead 205. Ah sweet Jesus Be thou pleased to take up thy aboad in my heart and dwell there as I may always find thâ— there to comfort me and to direct â— how to walk well pleasing unto thee â— me always hear thee speaking to me hoâ— I shall do every thing I take in hand to dâ— so that all my thoughts words and deed may tend only to thy honour and glory tâ— Credit of the Gospel the good of otherâ— and the eternal Salvation of mine own Soâ— 206. Ah Lord give me grace in all â—flictions to consider that it 's much less the I deserve and that thou mightest justly haâ— sent them on me sooner 207. Hell O Lord I confess is only mâ— desert what less thou givest me is moâ— â—n I have or can deserve and less punishâ—nt then the least of my Sins hath deserved 208. Therefore in all Conditions I desire â—less thy name and to praise thee with a â—nkfull contented and rejoycing heart 209. Let O Lord all thy afflictions teach and tell me that thou art mindfull of â— and that they are friendly yea Father-Visitations and Tokens of thy Fatherly â—e love in Jesus Christ 210. O Lord suffer me not to sell my â—tion in Heaven for any Portion of earth earth the Honours Riches or Pleasures â—ereof 211. Let even this Portion thy service â—d work O God be preferred by me and dearer to me then all things of this world 212. A Christian once in Christ united him cannot be taken out of him no more â—n the same water cast into the Sea can taken out again for he is become a part Christ even as the drops that fall into â—e Sea are forthwith a part thereof 213. Seeing then thou hast made me one â—th thee received me a little drop into â—y self the Ocean of Blessedness and of goodness happiness and felicity My â—eet Jesus I am sure I shall never be sepaâ—ted from thee 214. Let me O God so live the remainder of all my life here on earth as that â— mayest not be ashamed to be called my â— and to give me eternal life hereafter in â—ven 215. O sweet glorious and glorifieâ— sus inhabiting Eternity from all Eterâ— look not on me as I am in my self witâ— thee but as one in thee even as a mâ—ber of thy blessed self 216. Love me O Lord God â— thine own love even with that love iâ— sus Christ wherewith thou lovest thine â— 217. When O Lord I have thee thâ— alone I have what I desire yea and all I desire for thou art all and the only sire of all my desires 218. Give me O Lord thy self thoâ— without any thing else and I will never thee any thing else 219. But though thou dost O God â— me all things else and not thy self I â— account it even as nothing 220. Having thee alone My dear Jeâ— I have all things and having not theâ— have nothing that I truly love 221. Give me then thy self and â— shall content me but unless thou dost â— me thy self I am resolved never to be â—tented 222. Give me then so thy self O Lâ— â—o art my Delight as I may do all things â— thee and nothing at all without thee 223. Give me so thy blessed self as I may â—ays enjoy thee beholding thy glorious â—e and the light of thy blessed Counteâ—ce and may hear thy most sweet and â—mfortable voice to comfort revive â—d refresh me 224. Be thou O
Prisoner never any man desired so much to be let out of Prison as I do to be put in never any slave desired so much to be free as I doe to be bound unto thee O God my God unto thee unto thee my God never any man desired so earnestly to pay his debts as I desire to be further and to be more indebted give me O Lord I beseech thee more and more that I may every day yea every moment of the day all the days of my life unto the very last moment of the last day of my life be receiving that when this life is ended I may live an Eternal life to pay thee Eternally praise and thanksgiving Be thou then Ah sweet Jesus be thou always in me that I may always be in thee stand by me continually that I may always stand upright walk uprightly never fall go with me that I may never go from thee abide O Lord abide ever in me that I may ever abide in thee act in me O Lord act ever in me that I may ever act for thee speak O Lord speak continually in me that I may continually speak for thee work for me O Lord work always for me that I may always work for thee live in me O Lord live always in me that I may always live to thee and for thee Ah Lord do all for me do all for me that all that I shall henceforth always do may be all for thee that I may choose not my own will but thy will may be my choice Ah Lord let me know thy blessed voice that I may always answer thee at thy blessed call whether it be by night or by day as Samuel did and say with him and with his heart speak Lord for thy Servant heareth and with holy David for my heart is ready and with heavenly Paul what Lord what wilt thou have me to do Write O Lord I humbly beseech thy holy and divine laws of grace in my heart that with my heart I may delight in them and thy Statutes in my mind that all even all my mind may be still on them that they may be a savour of life unto life to my soul and of death unto death to my sins let thy Commandments O Lord be no more grievous unto me but joyous that I may ever find thy yoak easie and thy burthen light Let thy word O God feed me yea let me feast on it as on marrow and fatness let it refresh and comfort my heart as with Wine on the Lees yea as Wine well refined on the Lees let it be sweeter to my tast then honey yea then the Hony-comb Ah Lord let my heart be set on it and much more delighted with it then with gold yea then with much fine gold or precious pearls let it distill into my heart to ravish it Ah Lord let it so ravish me as all my sences may be filled and delighted with its sweetness Let me O Lord hear it attentively understandingly and feelingly as thine own word which thine own mouth hath spoken that my mouth may be filled with thy praises yea that I may trumpet them forth louldly and sweetly let mine eyes always look upon thee O Lord from whence my salvation cometh to behold thy beauty thy glory and thy blessedness as in thy Sanctuary that my feet may run in the ways of thy Commandments and not grow weary and walk and not faint O Lord let me sit under the shadow of thy branches continually for thy fruit is very pleasant unto my tast there is none in Heaven O Lord that my soul desireth as thee nor in all the earth in comparison of thee Ah how doth my soul and my heart long to be where thou art even where thou art O God in Heaven thy dwelling place glading and rejoycing the hearts of all those that behold thee beholding the brightness the sweetness the loveliness and the lovingness of thy most glorious most beautiful and most blessed countenance which to see is life yea much better than life Ah Lord bring me then home unto thee even to my long desired home that I may ever enjoy thee and live in thee my joy in whom my soul only delighteth to live for with thee I know is all joy unspeakable joy fulness of joy and at thy right hand O God are pleasures for ever more such as eye hath not seen ear hath not heard neither hath it ever entred into the heart of any man at any time to conceive Ah Lord God I well know and believe rejoycingly that thou knowest all things and therefore knowest well how my heart and my soul panteth for thee longeth for thee coveteth for thee and most ambitiously hungreth and thirsteth after thee Ah Lord when shall that blessed time be and the day come that I shall be altogether emptyed of my own emptyness and filled with thy fulness be stript of my own raggs and cloathed with thy glorious robes be found out of my self in thee be made partaker of thine own Holy and Divine nature which is perfection and glory in glory yea perfect glory then shall I be no more mine own but thine own yea thine all so that all that I shall do shall please thee well and be right well pleassing unto thee for then I shall no longer do the evil which I would not and which I hate but the good which I would and which I love yea the good and all the good that thou O God wilt and which thou lovest it shall not then be present with me only to will but to do also even all thy holy and whole and perfect will I shall then no longer desire to be stript of any thing that is in me because O God my God thou shalt be all in me and only in me then and there I shall no longer mourn for my unholiness nor pray for more blessedness but all tears fears and cares shall be all done away my unworthiness here shall through thy worthiness O sweet Jesus be accounted worthy my unrighteousness righteous my disobedience obedience and my imperfection perfect full and entire perfection through that ever blessed most blessed and only and all blessed perfection that in the thee who art God blessed for ever and ever Ah who would not then for a while feed on crums that he may eat of this bread and at last sup at this feast Ah who would not who would not be content to hunger a while to be brought to this banquet of heavenly dainties who would not Ah who would not be content for a little space to sit grovelling on the ground and be covered with dust and ashes that he may at last sit at this Table who would not Ah who would not stay a while without with patience being assured at last yea and ere long to be brought in into the brides Chamber Ah who would not who would not be poor for a while to be made thus rich for ever Ah who would
not who would not be content to be contemptible for a little space to be thus honoured and made truly honourable for ever Ah who would not who would not be right well content to be banisht for a while to be thus brought home in triumph gloriously to abide in his Fathers house for ever who would not Ah who would not be well content and rejoyce to be a stranger and a Pilgrim for a little while in a strange land to have such a possession for ever who would not Ah who is there that would not be in a storm for a while to enjoy for ever such a calm who would not who would not want the delicacies of Egypt for a while to have the delicacies of Heaven for ever who would not Ah who is there that would not refuse to be called the Son of Pharaoh's Daughter for a while to be the Son of the Eternal living loving blessed God for ever and for ever Ah who would not who would not willingly and cheerfully suffer with the Children of God for a while for a little space to raign with the Children of God for ever who would not Ah who would not willingly be cloathed with raggs for a while to wear for ever such glorious robes who would not Ah who is he that would not be Crowned with Thorns for a moment to be Crowned with such a Crown of glory for ever Ah who would not who would not bear the Cross here till death that he may for ever wear the Crown of immortal life Ah who would not who would not suffer with Christ here to raign with Christ for ever hereafter Ah who would not who would not be despised among men to be cherished among Angels Ah who would not who would not suffer as Lazarus did to raign as Lazarus doth Ah who would not who would not suffer as a member of Christs mystical body here to be a member of his glorious body for ever hereafter Ah who would not who would not live the life of the righteous here to live for ever and ever with the righteous hereafter not in the bosome of Abraham but in the bosome of Abraham's Isaac's and Jacob's Gods In the mean time O Lord give me grace courage and strength to run that good race to fight that good fight that thou hast set before me perseveringly unto the end that I may as willingly wear the Crown of Thorns here for thy sake as the Crown of glory hereafter for my own sake that I may be as willingly under temptation here as to be freed from temptation hereafter that for thy sake O Lord I may as willingly be contemptible here as honourable hereafter that I may as willingly suffer O Lord for thee here as raign with thee hereafter and that in all sufferings my only joy may be that I shall for ever enjoy thee But Ah Lord God what am I and what is there in me and therefore what am I able to do for thee or to render unto thee for this thy love which far surpasseth the love of Women Men or of Angels as there was never sorrow like to thy sorrow so there was never love like to thy love true it is O Lord for all this thy love thou requirest nothing but love again Ah how fain would I love thee but I cannot as I would how much less then is it then I should when I would do good evil is present and I do the evil many times which I would not but do not cannot do the good which I would to will is many times present but how to perform I know not but thanks be unto God through our Lord Jesus Christ though with my flesh I serve the law of sin yet with my mind I serve the law of God Grant then O sweet Jesus and give me grace that I may love thee as thou hast loved me and do for thee as thou hast done for me and to this end make my heart upright before thee even according to thine own heart that it may no longer be mine own but thine own that I may be only thine wholly thine holy thine always thine and ever thine that thou in me and I in thee may from sin be ever free Teach me O Lord so to number my days that I may apply my heart unto Wisdom that I may be always mindfull of my last end and of the reckoning that I must then make before thee the Judge of Heaven and Earth Ah Lord suffer me not any longer to walk after the devices of mine own decitfull evil heart but grant O God by thy power I may have power to do and walk uprightly before thee in all thy paths and that I may never more swerve nor turn aside out of the way of thy Commandments either to the right hand of pleasures or to the left hand of profits Give me grace O Lord God I most humbly beseech thee in Jesus Christ to see mine own badness and thy goodness ready and willing to make me good that I may see mine own emptiness and thy fulness ready to fill me mine own nakedness and thy robes to cover and cloath me mine own sinfulness and thy righteousness to make me righteous mine own cursedness and thy blessedness to make me blessed my own deformity and ugliness and thy beautifulness to make me beautifull my own slavery and thy freedom and freeness to make me free mine own unworthyness and thy worthyness to make me worthy mine own insufficiency and thine al-sufficiency mine own demerit and thy merit mine own disobedience and thine obedience mine own nothingness yea altogether nothing and thine Almightiness yea altogether all things for in thee are all things from thee come all things and by thee O God all things are and were created I do most unfeignedly confess O Lord that I am unable and unfit to speak unto thee and as unworthy to hear thee speak unto me for in me that is in my flesh there is no good I am all evil only evil and continually evil but in thee O God dwelleth all good for thou art all good only good and continually dost good without thee I can say nothing think nothing nor do nothing that is good suffer me not therefore O Lord I beseech thee to speak in my own wisdom for that would be but the wisdom of words but let me O Lord speak in thy wisdom which will be the words of wisdom and Wisdoms words Let me not O Lord go forth in my own strength against any Temptation for I am so weak I should be overcome and fall into any Temptation but let thy strength thy power thy might and thy love O Lord be seen in my weakness to strengthen me and by thy power powerfully working in me I may overcome and trample under my feet all the strength and power of all my adversaries and enemies Devils lust worlds lusts and self-lusts Ah Lord God suffer me not to go from thee for thou hast the
earthly Heaven may be a Heaven in part though not a perfect Heaven and that I may from day to day grow and increase from one degree of grace unto another until I come to enjoy that measure and fulness that thou hast O Lord my God in the infiniteness and eternity of thy love goodness and mercy through thy free grace in Jesus Christ reserved provided and appointed for me out of thine own abundant and overflowing fulness for with thee is fulness of joy and at thy right hand are pleasures for evermore Ah Lord for thy Mercies sake bring me unto that fulness that I may for ever rejoyce in that joy which bringeth such peace as passeth all understanding which eye hath not seen ear hath not heard neither hath it ever entred into the heart of man to conceive Ah Lord bring me into that Heaven and in the mean time let Heaven be in me for holiness is Heaven and Heaven is holiness therefore the more holiness is in us the more Heaven is in us yea the happiness in Heaven which is God himself Father Son and Holy Ghost three persons but one God Grant O Lord I most humbly beseech thee that I may do the work of my generation and lawfull calling prudently wisely justly and uprightly faithfully obedientlâ— circumspectly cheerfully willingly and perseveringly both before thee O God and before all men giving every man his due and doing unto all men as I would they should do unto me without respect of persons and let me always value and esteem these things below as low things as temporal inferior good things as common mercies of the left-hand of the foot-stool the nether Springs even such O Lord as thou givest unto all even unto the evil and wicked as well as unto the good and righteous as thou makest the Sun to shine and the rain to fall alike on all it being no Token either of thy Hatred or of thy Love Let me therefore O Lord have power through grace to use them as if I used them not and to live in this World as if I were not of this World making no provision for the flesh to satisfie the lusts thereof but that I may overcome the World by despising of it And give me not the things of the World O Lord I beseech thee till thou hast given me a heart to use them according to thine own heart even as liketh thee best and grant O Lord that I may be always as willing to leave them as to receive them and to give them back unto thee when thou pleasest and in thine own way as thine O Lord and not as mine blessing thee for the leaving them with me any time but most especially for the well using of them during that time considering that their well using will turn to my Eternal profit and their abusing of them to my Eternal loss Ah Lord let the eyes of my understanding be enlightned and always open to see the many perils and dangers in possessing them as well as their nothingness whilst I shall possess them and that worldly bliss consists more in possessing of little void of fears than of much subject unto danger and that it 's much the sweeter condition to want the Worlds sweetness than to have them if in their want we find no want and to esteem always that best which God giveth because he having promised will make it work for the best Come on me then what will come I doubt not Lord but I shall find it as I have hitherto found it to be for my good and coming from a God of Love to me in love and therefore O Lord I will love both thee and it and esteem every change the best change yea and a changing for the best and if at any time my condition should not please the flesh sure I am it will always please the Spirit if it please not at any time the outward it will always please the inward man if it please not the old man without it will please the new man within for Lord thou knowest if my condition should at any time displease me and I could change it yet I would not if by so doing I should displease thee for thou knowest I desire to please thee not my self the Spirit not the flesh the inward not the outward Man the New not the Old Man for I would not have what I would but O Lord that only that thou wilt be it what ever it will deny me not O Lord I most humbly most earnestly and most unfeignedly beg and beseech thâ—e in Jesus Christ for thine own dear and holy names sake deny me not this one thing whatever it cost me but let my life and my death my place of abode and condition be such as may O Lord bring thee most glory as may glorifie thee most O God of all Power and Glory And that seeing I served thee not O God my Creator in the days of my youth grant I beseech thee that I may serve thee freely cheerfully willingly and joyfully all the rest of my days unto the very last hour of my life that I may henceforth live the life of the righteous and that my last end may be like his Ah Lord let all the rest of my life to come be so spent as it may witness a continual sorrow for my life past that having lived here in thy fear I may dye O Lord my God in thy favour that having lived here the life of Grace I may ever hereafter live with thee O my sweet Jesus the life of Glory in thy Kingdom of Glory with the Father and the Holy Spirit O Lord that tryest the heart and searchest the Reins thou knowest all my thoughts as well as ponderest all my actions and therefore thou knowest how much my heart rejoyceth because that thou thus knowest it and because thou hast made it such as it is not that it is O Lord as it would or should be but because it willingly would be what it should be and that it would do and be as wilingly any thing that it wills as it wills it So it be O Lord God according to thy most holy righteous good blessed will And now O Lord God Almighty Maker Giver and Preserver of all things I most humbly beseech thee to hear me in Jesus Christ for all Kingdoms Nations and People in general and in particular over the face of the whole earth gather O Lord in much mercy gather thine Elect together from all the â—nds and corners of the World Jew and Gentile Turk and Infidel bond and free male and female young and old rich and poor Ah Lord be thou pleased in the greatness of thy compassions to pour out thy Holy Spirit upon all flesh and to write thy holy Laws of Grace in their hearts and thy Statutes of fear in their minds by the finger of thine Holy Spirit that every one may know who is the Lord and the power of his might that
can be done by them but what thou pleasest and sufferest to be done Cause them and all thy people to know that having thee on their side and for them they need not fear who be against them for none ever fought against thy power and prospered and that though thou dost usually use means yet thou canst O God we know if thou so pleasest do thy work without means yea and against means and that there is no means so contemptible but thou canst O God our God make effectual even to the pulling down of strong holds as thou did'st the Walls of Jericho at the noise of Rams Horns it is as easie with thee to do what thou willest as to will it all things are as easie as possible let us not then O God fear any power no nor all powers having thee the Lord for our God before whom all the Nations of the earth are as the drop of a bucket and as the dust of the ballance Thou holdest O God the Ocean in the hollow of thine hand and the earth is upheld and standeth fast by the power of thy might give us then O Lord God such fear as may cause us to love thee and such love as may cast out and destroy all fear for thou only who art God only art to be feared only Ah Lord look down graciously and in mercy upon poor afflicted Scotland and Ireland stir up thy self and come and save them even now now when there is no help for them nigh at hand O Lord be thou their help and help thou them and give them grace to put their trust in thee that thou mayest be their help and deliverer of three Nations make us O Lord one people that we may be knit together with the bonds of love and unity serving thee O Lord with a perfect heart in holiness and righteousness all the days of our lives And though O Lord thou hast delivered them into our hands and given us power over them Ah Lord suffer us not to do other unto them than we would they should do unto us and that we lay not on them too heavy burthens to bear Bless O Lord I beseech thee all my kindred and acquaintance in the flesh Ah Lord I know that thou knowest all their soul and body cases Ah be thou pleased in Jesus Christ to come into their help and give them deliverance make O Lord make their hearts below their conditions and then make their conditions what thou wilt lay no more O Lord on them than thou shall be pleased to enable them to bear and then lay on them what thou wilt Ah Lord cause every thing to work together for their good let them always see and acknowledge that thou punishest them far less than their iniquities deserve and that all afflictions whatsoever come from thee but the procuring cause is in themselves make them O Lord as willing to wear the Cross here as the Crown hereafter to suffer for thee here as to reign with thee hereafter And though O Lord they be poor in the world let them be rich in grace though they be contemptible in the world let them be honourable in thy sight be thou O Lord their Portion and make them thine inheritance and grant O Lord I beseech thee that their last days may be their best days and their last thoughts their best thoughts that they may be thy faithfull humble and obedient Servants unto their lives end living the lives of the Righteous that they may be like them both in death and after death Be thou with them O Lord in all places and at all times that they may always sit under the shadow of thy wings and that the fruit of thy word may be pleasant unto the tast of their souls let them through grace delight to walk in the ways of thy Statutes and let thy Commandments be their daily talk suffer them not O Lord to go astray from thee either after the pleasures or profits of the world but inable them all through grace to walk uprightly and circumspectly before thee unto their lives end Be mindfull and mercifull O Lord unto all the Sons and Daughters of affliction wheresoever dispers'd wheresoever scattered on the face of the whole earth bring home O Lord all that are banisht deliver all Captives and set free all Prisoners that every one may sit under his Vine and rejoyce under his Fig-Tree eating in peace the fruits of their labours visit O Lord the sick comfort the comfortless bind up the broken heart heal the wounded heart give life to the dead heart give the grace of faith unto the doubting heart and of hope unto the despairing heart speak peace O Lord unto the disconsolated and afflicted heart give understanding memory sense and reason unto the distracted heart and those amongst them whom thou dost intend O Lord and hast appointed to take unto thy self let them see thine arms of love in mercy open and ready to receive them let them hear O Lord thy sweet and comfortable voyce speaking peace unto their Souls and saying Sons and Daughters be of good cheer your sins are forgiven you wash them O Lord with thy most dear and most pretious blood and sanctifie them with thy holy spirit of grace that they may appear spotless and unblameable before thee whiter than Snow purer than Wool finer than Gold and brighter than the Sun and make them O Lord more than Conquerours and those O Lord whom thou dost intend to restore unto their former health and strength give them grace to lead new lives and to become new Creatures that others seeing their good works may glorifie thee O God our Heavenly Father in Jesus Christ Ah Lord God look with much mercy I humbly beseech thee upon all those every where that suffer for the Peace of a good Conscience because they will not sin against thy truth keep them O Lord as the Apple of thine eye that nothing come nigh to hurt them nor to affright them let them depend on thy mercies fear thy judgments and lay hold on thy gracious promises give them O Lord courage and strength to fight that good fight and to run that good race that thou hast set before them that they may be always-willing and ready to give up their lives unto the death and then from thee O Lord they may receive the Crown of Eternal life And those O Lord that suffer for an evil Conscience because they have sinned against thy truth let them not always mourn as men and women without hope but pour down O Lord in much love and mercy pour down thy holy and blessed spirit the Comforter into their hearts that may speak peace unto their Souls even that peace that passeth all understanding let not the Mountains of their sins O Lord nor the Rocks of unbelief hinder thy mercies from coming down out of Heaven into their Hearts nor their Prayers from ascending up unto thee by faith but cause them O
when we love our Selves only that is chiefly for our selves for our own sakes such desire Heavens joys to enjoy them because they are the greatest joys 't is not Heaven for God but God for Heaven that they would and that they mind they love the wages but not the work the Crown but not the Cross to reign with Christ and as Christ doth but not to suffer with Christ and as Christ did to wear his Crown of Glory but not his Crown of Thorns to live as he doth but not as he did to be his Servant in Heaven but not his Disciple on Earth to have the recompence of Reward there as a good and faithfull Servant but not to serve him here as a Son or a Servant they would willingly have their own will done both on Earth and in Heaven but not his on Earth no not for Heaven they would believe in him but not suffer for him they would live with him there but not dye with him here they fly many times from sin because of the pain woe grief and torment it will bring they fly from the punishment not from the sin they hate not sin as it is sin and because it is Sin for many times they love the sin which they commit not which they dare not commit and so they many times do good but not because it is good and for that it is the Command of God their delight is not to him nor his ways nor to the keeping of his Commandments but their delight is â—o delight themselves the end of all their aim and the aim of all their end is to please themselves and therefore if at any time they do good it is to do good to themselves 't is not for God's sake nor for goodness sake but for their own sakes for many times they do what they would not do and seem to love what they do not love and to hate what they do not hate they prefer the flesh to please the flesh and to enjoy fleshly pleasures before the pleasing of God and the enjoying of God and spiritual pleasures they prefer Communion with the Creature before Communion with the Creator and their own low base ends before his high holy great and glorious ends how dully droopingly faintly feebly coldly and sluggishly do they go about Gods work and service any thing that concerns his honour and glory what icy frozen benumm'd dead hearts have they thereunto though in the doing of all this it is to do for themselves to work for themselves and to serve themselves but how Ah how jollily cheerfully lively nimbly quickly ardently and hotly do they go about the things that no whit at all concerns God but themselves how stoutly strongly and vigorously do they wrestle for the world and the things of the world and to have a blessing of increase on their works and labour for the flesh but how ah how faintly cowardly and feebly do they wrestle with God in duties in prayer meditation hearing and reading the word of God as if they would not that blessing or at least cared not for it thus God's work and Soul work is to them of little concernment and when they do mind the Soul and Heaven it is because of its happiness they then seek God for Heavens sake but never Heaven for God's sake and even then when the Lord sends a fair wind with the breath and spirit of his grace into their hearts to hasten them forward to their place of rest and to make them to sail over the floods and tempests of tentations and waves of opposition yet then Ah then so selfish fond stupid and ignorant are they as they hoyse up all the Sayls they can to go against this sweet new fresh gale they row and tug and toyl to go back from their Port from their Haven Harbour which is so near them desiring not to come so soon to their journeys end they desire not so soon to end their journeying travel and pains in the flesh they prefer this travel and toyl and care before that peace and rest and ease and joy and though this all all this be but vanity and brings nothing but vexation of Spirit yet so contrary are they to God and his ways that they will none of them as long as they can these they gladly and willingly will put off that day for this nay though God do at times shew some of them Heaven as he did Paul and they behold things utterable and with Peter see the glory of the Lord which is unconcivable yet these foresights and fore-tasts being taken from them or they from it Ah how soon do they forget that ever they saw any such thing how soon how gladly willingly and cheerfully do they return to Egypt the place of their Captivity and joyfully and heartily feed on the Garlick and Onions yea on the husks that Swines feed on so much love they have to themselves as they forget God and that they were Created for him and unto good works to please and serve him such then as thus love or love thus are self-lovers only or chiefly and therefore not right or true lovers because they love not God rightly therefore not truly for he is to be beloved first of all most of all beyond and above all he being our only chief supream Soveraign superiour and best good all good being in him and flows only from him he containing all and being contained by none 54. But as for me O Lord as for me I know O Lord I know that there is none in Heaven but thee nor in all the earth in comparison of thee a Door-keeper O Lord a Door-keeper in thy House do I much prefer choose and embrace rather than to dwell in Tents or Tabernacles with the wicked with those that know thee not and that fear thee not I much rather Ah Lord thou knowest that I had much rather be afflicted and choose and prefer banishment poverty contempt disgrace imprisonment and death for thy sake and the Gospels as thy Servant rather yea much rather than to enjoy all these pleasures in the flesh these fleshly pleasures with the wicked any life O Lord and any death yea that life and that death in that place and condition as may bring thee most glory do I most humbly and unfeignedly beg in Jesus Christ and for his sake Ah Lord God I hast me unto thee I desire to flye into thee and to be found ever in thee yea though thou shouldest make all my life as Paul's and Peter's were when they saw and enjoyed in part those blessed joys prepared and laid up for the blessed yea though I could always see Heaven open as Stephen and thou O Lord my Jesus and my Christ standing at the right hand of God should not would not my heart heartily say with Simeon Lord now let thy servant depart in peace for mine eyes have seen thy great Salvation would it not cry out none but Christ none but
in me 143. And seeing that the more holy we are the more heavenly we are and the more like unto thee O most heavenly and most holy Lord God that is throughout holy in Spirit Soul and Body grant that though I am here below on earth and earth I may in holiness be like unto thee above who art in Heaven and art Heaven 144. Ah Lord God that hast fitted and prepared Heaven for me prepare me for it that I may enjoy thee all who art my all and my only Joy 145. And seeing none shall enjoy thee in Heaven but those that enjoy thee on Earth Ah Lord let me so enjoy thee here that I may long to be dissolved for ever to enjoy thee there yet not for mine own sake only but for thine own sake good Lord. 146. Ah Lord let my joy be so full of thee here on Earth as I may always long to be filled with thy fulness of joy in Heaven and to enjoy fully those pleasures that are there at thy right hand and shall endure for ever more 147. Yet O Lord I humbly beseech thee in Jesus Christ to make me still patient to wait untill my blessed change shall come and that I may always say thine O Lord thine and not my will be done 148. Ah come Lord Jesus come when thou wilt and as thou wilt either at midnight or at the Cock crowing for though I do long for thy coming to take me hence unto thy self yet I would rather O Lord thou knowest that I had rather abide here to do thy will and for thy sake on earth than to leave thy will undone and to be in Heaven for my own sake 149. Ah Lord my Lord and my God I confess that thou hast in the abundance of thy goodness love and mercy done so much for me in bringing me out of Hell and assuring me of Heaven that even all that I can imagine to do to lose or to suffer is so little so too too little as I could wish yea and do wish that I could do more and suffer more to witness that my little will is great or desires and would be great willingly 150. Ah Lord I know and am well assured that thy goodness is so great and thy greatness so good for the sake of my soul that my soul longeth to be great in goodness to do great good things for thy great goodness sake 151. Ah Lord God seeing what thou hast done for me is to assure me of thine Eternal Love and Mercy in Jesus Christ give me I beseech thee grace that I may not turn thy gifts of grace into wantonness but for this thy Love wherewith thou hast loved me grant that it may be a strong and firm obligation unto me to depend upon thy Love and to be assured that thou wilt continue to do as thou hast begun that is continually continue to love me 152. For seeing none but thy self O Lord could do the things that thou hast done that is to love me such a loveless yea vile wretch as I am in my self I will therefore be bold to say surely the Lord will ever love me because he doth thus love me and hath ever loved me thus 153. Ah suffer me not then O Lord God holy just and true to depart from thee by setting up any other God in my heart or my heart to love choose or esteem any other good than thy self who art only good all good and able only to do me all good and to make me to do all good 154. Ah Lord God in thine own good time accomplish and finish the good which thou hast begun to work in me by causing me to depart from all evil 155. And suffer me not I humbly beseech thee for thine own great holy and dear name sake to go astray from those holy holy holy ways which thou hast set before me and written with the finger of thine own Spirit on my heart 156. But grant O Lord that my Soul may continually be ravisht with the pleasantness of them and to delight to sit always under the shadow of thy branches for thou knowest O Lord thou right well knowest how sweet and delightful the fruit of thy Word and the knowledge of thy ways is to the tast of my Soul 157. And therefore and to praise thee doth my Soul long to come into thy house to behold thy beauty and thy glory as in thy Sanctuary and to hide my self under the shadow of thy wings that no evil may come nigh me to hurt me 158. Ah Lord thou that hast wrought in me holy desires to do thy whole and holy will give me grace to teach and instruct others and to tell them how willing thou art to teach all sinners to come out of their sins and to direct them how to walk well pleasing unto thee and to lead them by the hand that they slip not 159. Ah Lord suffer me not to do as do the men of the World to labour to heap up and gather these things that profit not and to leave behind me much of these low earthly outward things that endure but for a season but let me rather cast off these garments bespottted in the flesh and follow thee naked and gather up and distribute those true and heavenly riches which shall make the Soul glad and rich and honourable for ever that my heirs may be heirs of Heaven and not of Earth 160. Ah Lord Let all the Worlds all be all unto me as I was unto thee when in it and of it even as a menstruous cloth and my all not worth any thing at all 161. Ah Lord suffer me not to mind earth any more with an earthly but with a heavenly mind and that my heart may be always there where my true only and everlasting treasure is and that I may live in the World as if I were not of the World and use these things below as low things even as if I used them not 162. Ah Lord suffer me not to mind these things my self which I teach and labour to have others forget and not to mind and so save them but perish my self 163. Ah Lord full of grace give me grace to shew forth unto all that all my covetings ambition and longings are for the things above and not for these things here below and that these things here are fit and only fit for such as have their hearts and affections here 164. Ah Lord sure yea most sure it is that those that are risen with thee will seek the things that are above even where thou sittest at the right hand of God and that those that do it not are not yet risen but lye dead in the grave of their sins 165. Ah Lord suffer not the World to deceive any that their Souls may not be deceived and they perish for ever in their sins 166. But bring them all home Ah Lord bring them all home unto thy self and betroth them all to thy self here by
forsaken of all if thou dost here forsake God and refuse to be led guided and directed by his holy Spirit who is only able to keep thee safe from all evil and to do thee all all good 207. O man man Reader whoever thou art I pray thee I pray thee as the Prophet did and say unto thee in his words O earth earth earth return return unto the Lord thy God and thou shalt find mercy his hand is not shortned his ear is not dull of hearing he is the same yesterday to day and for ever it is thy sins thy sins and only thy sins that separate between thee and thy God leave Ah leave then but thy sins and return unto the Lord and thou shalt find mercy and to our God who is full of Compassion Ah tast tast and see how good the Lord is and how gracious he will be unto thee if thou wilt leave and forsake thy filthy filthy sins though thou hast played the Prodigal and spent the stock of his Grace on Harlots and Strangers in a far Country yet Ah yet if thou wilt but return whilst he seeth thee yet afar off he will run towards thee to meet thee and fall on thy neck and kiss thee and kill for thee the fatted Calf and array thee with the best white Robes even with the Royal and most glorious Robes of his own only natural Son and thine Eldest Brother Christ Jesus he will delight in thee yea set his heart upon thee to do thee good and bring thee home to himself and give thee himself for thy Portion and make thee his own inheritance for ever 208. But I am perswaded that thou art fully perswaded that there is not so much sweetness in Jesus Christ as in the World nor his paths are not so pleasant and delightful as the ways of sin and therefore thou makest the World thy God and thy Christ and lovest it as thou should'st love God and Christ well the world and sin and its good and pleasures thou knowest well I desire only this one thing of thee that thou would'st labour to know Christ as well as thou knowest the world and sin serve him as many years as thou hast served them and if thou dost not find more sweet more beauty more pleasantness more delight more profit more advantage and more honour than in the world and sin return then to thine old Masters again and serve them but I promise and assure thee and will freely pawn thee my soul for surety that thou shalt gain more by serving Christ one year if that thou dost it as thou oughtest than by serving the world and sin all the days of thy lif 〈…〉 and if thou dost repent of thy bargain I will confess that I do deserve thy curses and not thy prayers thou shalt find thou shalt find that his ways are not strowed with Thorns and Thistles as thou supposest but with Odoriferous Roses and sweet perfumes as thou supposest not keep Ah keep faithfully thy Covenant with God and he will give thee much more than thou art able to ask than thou art able to think 209. Consider the service thou shalt do for God thou shalt by thy life if Godly perhaps bring home many to him for thy Companions heretofore in sin will have more regard to thee than unto others of the Godly and will now conclude that surely Gods ways are the most pleasant and delightsome seeing thou preferrest them and choosest and esteemest and praisest them above and more and beyond all the wayes of sin and this may cause them perhaps to make a tryal which if they do there is hopes for God will not be wanting on his part to shew them mercy if they desire it and seek it faithfully with all their hearts 210. If thou wilt then witness thy living and being risen with Christ seek the things that are above where Christ sitteth at the right hand of God set your affections on things above not on things on the earth let your hearts be where your treasure is for ye are dead and your life is hid with Christ in God put off Ah put off the old man with all his deeds and put on the new man which is renewed in knowledge and after the Image of him that Created him and as the Elect of God put on bowels of mercies kindness humbleness of mind meekness longsuffering forbearing one another and forgiving one another if any man hath a quarrel against any even as Christ forgave you so also do ye and above all these things put on Charity which is the bond of perfectness and let the peace of God rule in your hearts to the which also ye are called in one body and be ye thankful let the Word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another in Psalms and Hymns and spiritual Songs singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord and whatsoever ye do in word and deed do all in the name of the Lord Jesus giving thanks to God and the Father by him so then when Christ who is our life shall appear then shall ye also appear with him in glory 211. These are and I trust through Gods free grace in Jesus Christ shall ever be the longings and desires of the soul of my soul and the heart of my heart for all you that shall read it and for all the Israel of our God and I hope and shall pray the Lord in the infiniteness of his goodness to supply all my defects with the teachings and comforts of his own spirit who is the only teacher guider leader and Comforter Ah seek him then whil'st he may be found and God I hope will give him thee 212. Now the peace of God which passeth all understanding keep your hearts and minds in the knowledg and love of God and of his Son Jesus Christ our Lord and the blessing of God Almighty the Father the Son and the Holy Ghost be with you and dwell in your hearts abundantly to the praise and glory of his holy name the good of others and the comfort of your own Souls Now henceforth and for ever more Amen 213. I had much rather be the poorest in the World even a Job or a Lazarus O Lord for thy sake than the richest of the World yea than to have all the World for my own sake 214. For I have all that I would have when I have all that thou O Lord my God wilt have me to have 215. I esteem all even as nothing at all if it come not O Lord from thee all 216. Alas alas what and how much nothing is this Worlds all if we have not Christs all that is all Christ 217. Let me then O my sweet Jesus have all that thou hast and I will not care whether I have any thing at all of all that the World hath 218. He that hath Christ for his Christ is heir of all things and sure of all things but
him glory for all which is what he only requires for this his continually giving of us all even to give him continually for ever and ever all glory for his thus ever and for ever giving us all grace perfect grace and glory yea fulness of all perfect grace and glory 281. As on Earth we delight to have much so nothing more delights God than that we crave much the more we ask the more we are sure to have and therefore doth he bid us to open our mouths wide and then he promiseth to fill them and the wider they are the sooner they shall be filled his ways nor his thoughts are not as ours he is never weary giving nor repenteth importunate beggars are best welcome and those that are not satisfied with a little he takes pleasure to give them much our dissatisfaction herein is his satisfaction our covetings cause his liberality with our ambition to have all and to be denyed nothing at all he is right well pleased and by thus exalting him as our chief and only good doth he exalt us and set us on such high mountains that we can even see not only such glory as is the glory of this World and the old Jerusalem but that of his Kingdom of Grace here and Glory hereafter the New Jerusalem the City of our God where he is sitting on his Throne of Majesty and great Glory unvailing himself as it were that we may behold him and his unapproachable transcendent bright glorious light of Glory 282. I would be willingly barren even of all Spiritual comforts if thereby I might be made more able to bear fruit to God and for God I would have no comfort nor delight if thereby as it were I could and did more delight and comfort my God that is I would rather Joy God than enjoy God by knowing or feeling not that I could be content to know that I were without him that he were not my God God forbid but I prefer him much before my own chief good of Joy his glory being my only yea all my Glory 283. I would rather yea much rather do God's work here and have no wages than have wages here and do no work 284. I had rather yea much rather whilst here be always working than always receiving wages for this life of time I know is appointed for our working time and our hereafter life of time for our time of receiving wages 285. I would whilst here be willing to spend all my time to do all good for I know that all my hereafter time shall be spent in receiving all good 286. I would willingly most willingly work Gods work always while here for that Ah for that blessed wages which I know I shall receive from him for ever hereafter which is such and so great as eye hath not seen ear hath not heard neither hath it ever entred into the heart of man at any time to conceive I know that I shall enter not only into the joy of my Lord but also into the Lord of my joy 287. It is wagâ—s great enough and good enough to be always doing thy great good work O Great God 288. I would willingly Ah most willingly serve the Lord most and best of all men If I could and yet I desire as much and as willingly would that every man might serve him more and please him better 289. Ah what delight is it to that soul that delights his God what joy doth it bring to that heart that joyeth his God that is to rejoyce always in him for God much delighteth in those yea most of all that make him their only delight 290. Ah Lord how unpleasant are all other pleasures to those that flow from thee how empty Ah how empty is all other fulness what poverty Ah how beggarly a thing is all other riches and how little Ah how little joy doth that Soul take in all other things that knoweth thee and the Ocean of joy yea fulness of joy and blessedness that is O Lord in thee and prepared by thee to rejoyce them that thus wait at thy gates and are hungar-starved for want of it 291. Who can Ah who can measure the Heavens span the Earth empty the Sea count the Stars and the sands of the Sea-shore if not who then caâ— rightly speak of or tell the mercies of our God who delighteth in mercy yea whose mercies are far above all these and all other his works 292. How willingly Ah how willingly would I forget my self to mind only my God and to do all his mind to fulfill all his will and to rejoyce in all his doings I would love my self my own self no more but only my God my God only and ever adore I would willingly deny my self that is my flesh all pleasures to please him that hath rivers of pleasures provided to please fill and satisfie me with even such as flow from his own right hand 293. Ah Lord God how much better is it to see thy sweet thy blessed and most amiable face in thine Ordinances and in duties than the face of the most gloriouâ— Angel in glory 294. Yea Lord yea thy back parts here I much prefer to see and behold than all their faces 295. Surely a day yea one hour of a day is to be preferred of communion with thee before the enjoyment of all things out of thee all our days 296. For in thee O Lord in thee is all things but out of thee is nothing desirable 297. All sweets but thine are bitter 298. But O Lord how savoury yea how pleasant and sweet are thy bitter when thou seasonest them with grace 299. Thy Voyce rejoyceth O Lord more that Soul to whom it speaketh peace than all the joyes of the World can to any man if he did always and ever enjoy all their sweets and never enjoy any of their bitter 300. Above all things and more than all things my soul desireth thee O Lord God who art the Lord of all things 301. Loving of God is knowing of him fearing of him is adoring of him choosing him shews a delight in him running after him is prizing of him seeking of him shews our longing desire for him to hunger and thirst for him is embracing of him with eager covetings to serve him is to honour him to rejoyce in him is to glorifie him to praise him is to magnifie him and to worship him is to exalt him 302. It is better and more profitable many times to be silent than to speak for the eagerness of our desires to speak takes away and hinders us from comprehending what we do hear so as we consider not what is spoken so much as what we desire and would speak 303. But Ah how much better is it to hear the Spirit of God speak to our hearts than the spirit of man to our ears or our selves to our selves to consult with the spirit and to talk with the spirit than with the flesh either our own or others
that only which he feels is not words only but works also yea the work of Gods spirit for its the spirits work thus to work to work his will and his work on our hearts and to cause us to feel that is to know that he works for us and in us and will never leave thus working till he hath wrought out our Salvation that is till he hath sanctified us throughout in spirit soul and body and prepared and fitted us for Heaven as Heaven is fitted and prepared for us 19. Ah how great a folly is it to prize any other wisdom or to account any other thing wisdom then this one thing feelingly to know and to know feelingly in truth and sincerity that Jesus is the Christ our Christ and our Jesus to anoynt us and to sanctifie and save us to be unto us Wisdom Righteousness Justification and Redemption 20. O my soul my soul fry from all other knowledge that hinders this as from madness and folly as from mad folly and foolish madness brutishness and stupidity and chuse to learn and learn to chuse this one thing needfull that is to know Jesus Christ and him Crucified for thee for thee my soul and body in thy place and stead not with the knowledge of the letter but of the spirit for thus to know him is life yea life Eternal Eternal and Everlasting life 21. How willing Ah how willing is that soul that receives any thing from God to lay it out for him that is to give it unto others he would indeed be always receiving and God and his own heart only knows how willing he is to be always giving even as if he desired and begged for others and not for himself and as it 's freely given him so doth he freely or would if he could freely give it unto others he will not Ah he will not he cannot consent to napkin it up or hide it he would be thus rich and wise and honourable but it is to do good works as it were to make others such when others are what they should be he praiseth God much on their behalf and rejoyceth with unspeakable joy for the glory of God is his only rejoycing he minds in some manner yea and often too more others welfare than his own because it seems to him that he cannot alone do what he would have done for his God therefore as soon as he receives this Heavenly treasure he desires to shew himself to be the Treasurer of Heaven to distribute it unto those that want that lack it that are hunger starved and when he meets with such and perceives and finds that they feed heartily and savour it Ah how doth he bless God for thus blessing him and them for thus using him as an instrument as his hand and mouth as it were to give unto them and to help their infirmities but he gives it not as his own but as his Masters goods for he chargeth them strictly to account themselves Debtors to his Lord not to him for he always to all acknowledgeth to have nothing but what he hath received he will by no means hide his light under a bushel but puts it on a Candlestick that it may be seen his only ambition is so to traffick with it that it may redound to his Masters profit and advantage that being he is certain he shall ever have a well being that is be received into and ever to abide in the joy of his Lord yea into the Lord of his joy 22. Ah Lord empty my self of my self my heart of my own heart my affections of my own affections my thoughts of all my own thoughts that I may be filled with thee who fillest all Creatures with all the good things they enjoy â—e thou O Lord be thou all my all all my honour wisedom strength riches pleasures life contentment and happy days for even then when I have all things and have thee not thou knowest O Lord that I have nothing for that I esteem them all even nothing at all but when I have thee Ah when I have thee I have all things that I would have that my soul desireth or can ask or crave 23. Give me but thy self O Lord O Lord give me but thy self and then give me what thou wilt to do to be or to suffer for thee I accept Ah I most willingly accept of it and promise for ever obedience unto it 24. Though I am unable unfit and cannot do what I would do yet most willingly I would and most unfainedly I do desire to do what I should do 25. O Lord I know that thou knowest all things and therefore I know that thou knowest how willingly I would and how much I desire to give thee all my life all my labour and all my love 26. For there is no other thing lovely or deserves to have our loves but that one thing thy Love O God O God thy Love thy Love 27. Ah what is all mans teachings and mans doings to that O God which by thy Spirit thou teachest us to know and inablest us to do 28. If it be so sweet Ah if it be so sweet a thing to think of God and his ways here on earth in the flesh so that all earthly sweets or earths sweets are made bitter by it unsavory and unwholsome Ah how wholsome savory and sweet is it to walk O Lord in all thy ways to do all thy will and to enjoy thy self all as thou art in Heaven where thinking thoughts hoping desires and believing joys shall be turned into possessing truths even true possession of all that ever we believed desired hoped or thought on yea it shall far surpass all the imaginations of our hearts of our desires or hopes being infinite and incomprehensible as well as Everlasting and Eternal 29. And when O God thou hast thus filled us here thou dost at times seem to us to be as the ebbing Sea go back again but that we may not remain comfortless thou comest again unto us into us even as the flood yea as the full Sea to shew us witness to us and assure us that there is no want decrease nor deminishing in thee but that thou art still the same full of bounty goodness love and willingness to do us all good much above what we can ask or think 30. There is Ah there is a most blessed Heaven to be had on this side Heaven even whilst we are on earth which is an assurance certain or a certain and a sure assurance of that Heaven of Heaven in Heaven and this some have always within them at all times and places they enjoy this unspeakable joy but more fully sweetly and particularly at some times when they have a near Converse and Communion with God then are they as it were wrapt up in God and cloathed with him and filled with him and made meet and fitted by him then Ah then do they sing new songs of deliverance rejoycing with unspeakable joy that they
in us What ah what so sweet as to feed continually on these true heavenly sweets here on earth which are the very sweets of Heaven in Heaven 108. I do now wonder that any man hath or can have any peace a moment that hath not his peace made sure or a sure peace made with God 109. All other quiet ah how unquiet will it prove in the end that is not founded or grounded on this sure foundation or ground of Gods love in Jesus Christ 110. I wonder Ah I wonder men are not as it were continually torn in pieces with sears and cares till all these sears are taken away by a lively living Faith and their whole cares cast on Christ 111. I wonder Ah I wonder that terrors do not always terrifie them that Hells torments do not affright and amaze them until that they have a sure and certain confidence that Christ hath redeem'd them from it 112. I wonder yea I much wonder that any man can call any thing else a good thing but only this one thing that is so good even Christ's goodness and that he is mine and that I am his even bone of his bone and flesh of his flesh and that I am sure he hath so loved me as to give himself for me to dye in my place and stead So that I am now reconciled thereby unto God who is become my Father and my God 113. I wonder Ah I much wonder now that any man can desire to live any other life or dye any other death than to God and for God 114. I wonder now yea I now do very much wonder that all men do not seek this one thing necessary so necessary to give up themselves even all their all unto God by good works and a holy life to live to him only by whom they only live and for whom only they are and were created 115. I wonder Ah I wonder now that any other life can give or should give us any or the least pleasure for thus to live in for and to God is only to live and he that thus lives lives only and none but such do live for those and all those that live not unto God are dead though they be alive yea though they do live 116. The worst of men and all men and at all times wish to dye the death of the righteous as Balaam did but few Ah few sincerely desire to live the life of the righteous for if they would they might and be assured to their eternal and everlasting joy that if they did so live they should so dye and then so live with God and in God eternally 117. Ah let us then not only desire but also earnestly labour and endeavour so to live in this life as we would live in the after life when this life shall be no more and to hate sin and love righteousness now as those do and shall then and as we shall likewise if we live in God with them and he that so loves and hates here shall ever live in Love for ever hereafter 118. Let us love the Lord heartily in all things and for all things knowing assuredly that all things that he doth unto us are in Love 119. Therefore if the Lord strike me I will rejoyce in it because it is his hand doth it yea I will therefore mightily rejoyce 120. What ever the Lord doth unto me I will rejoyce mightily in it because he doth it and because he doth it unto me therefore I know it is best for me and I know that his end in it is to make me to rejoyce 121. Strike then O Lord strike strike and spare not either on my body or Soul goods or good name when thou wilt where thou wilt and in what manner soever thou wilt I am ready most ready and most willing to praise thee to laud extol and magnifie thee and to declare that so I would have it yea that I would only have it so for thou knowest O Lord my heart and therefore that with my heart I heartily desire to be and have what thou wilt have me to have and to be thy will O God thy good will and not mine let be always done in me and upon me 122. I desire to live in God only that I may only live to and for his glory 123. To glorifie God is true glory the glory only which is true 124. To possess God is true riches the riches only which is true 125. To get God is to get all for all things else are nothing nothing yea nothing at all 126. To be with God is to be free for all things Lord are still in thee 127. Thou art that all that only all that ever was and ever shall 128. I have nothing wherein to boast but in the Love and Mercies of my God and of his Mercies and Love I am resolved ever to boast 129. He that possesseth God possesseth all things that he would possess and careth not nor asketh not nor regardeth not any other possessions 130. He that feareth God rightly feareth no other fears how dreadful or fearful soever they be no not his many great fearful sins nor death the King of terrors and fears 131. He that enjoyeth God hath all the joyes he would enjoy or can desire to have for to him God is much more by much than all and above all things that can be enjoyed 132. He that loveth God truly and rightly hath all that he loveth because he loveth nothing like him or in comparison oâ— him either in Heaven above or on the Earth beneath 133. He that pleaseth God by walking wellpleasing before him hath and he can desire no other pleasures for to keep his Laws is all his delight and the only thing that bringeth joy to his heart and that feasteth his Soul with marrow and fatness yea with all pleasant things 134. He that thus giveth up himself to God and acknowledgeth him for his all shall have of him here as well as hereafter much I say much above all that he is able to ask or think 135. He that only willeth Gods will hath always his own will at all times in all places and conditions 136. He that giveth himself to God may be sure that God hath given himself unto him more sure and therefore all that God hath is his 137. He that would no other good but God hath God and therefore all good for he that hath God sure hath all things else sure he may be sure for in him are all things and from him come all things therefore to him alone and unto none else be only all honour and all glory for ever and for ever 138. Ah what a blessed yea most blessed Heaven is it to walk in the ways of God which will assuredly lead us and bring us to the Heaven of Heaven in Heaven 139. To possess God we must dispossess our selves of our selves 140. To be filled with God we must empty our selves of our whole selves 141.
God my God is so good he is so good and so delightfull as he is now become my whole and my sole delight 78. Ah if it could be ever thus with me I am sure I should never want any of these things that the flesh craves not bread to feed me not drink to refresh me not cloaths to cover me having and possessing the things above and could they Ah and could they always be possest I think none but mad men and fools will dare say that we want any of the things below though we should want them all As to me I am sure I should not find any want if I could be always as I have been sometimes 79. But O Lord I praise thee O Lord I mightily prize and praise thee that I am content with thy will that is yet to live in this Bacca in this Wilderness and in this Valley of Tears as long as thou wilt yea I am so content that I pray heartily with my whole heart Let thy will be done on me wholly as thou wilt and not as I will or would I desire to be only only to be what thou wilt have me to be thine O Lord thine and not my will be done until thy Kingdom come Amen Amen So be it Lord so be it Amen Amen 80. To have all things and not to have God sure is to have nothing sure to possess all things and not to possess God is to possess nothing all things besides God are vanity foolishness nothingness will flye from us and leave us for ever even then and when we have most need of help succour and defence but God will leave us never If we be his he will surely stand by us defâ—nd us assist us and give us all that we shall stand in need of yea much above what we can ask or think 81. The very least mercy or blessing either on body or soul which I have received from God deserves much more praise by much than I am able to give unto God though I should continually praise him and live continually to his praise for what am I poor despicable I that I should receive any thing from the hand of God! But ah how much less then from the heart of God in love 82. I know O Lord God that thou hast regard to my feebleness to make me strong to my poverty despicable poverty to make me rich for ever to my nakedness to cover me with thy most glorious Robes to my emptiness to fill me with thy blessed most blessed self to my uncleanness and filthiness to wash me white and to make me clean to my uncomliness to make me comly to my ugliness to make me lovely to my wretchedness and misery to make me honourable and blessed and to my nothingness to give me all things for ever and for ever So be it Lord so be it 83. Who can ah who can measure the earth fathom the sea and coÌ„unt the stars in heaven and yet how much more unable and hard is it to measure to comprehend and understand the height the depth the length and the breadth of the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. 84. His goodness is as his greatness incomprehensibly great 85. Thy presence O God thy presence makes all things that are bitter sweet and thy absence makes all sweet things bitter 86. O God thou givest such gifts to men that they can see even here in the flesh by the eye of faith that which thou hast prepared for them in heaven that Christ and all his graces and righteousness is theirs that heaven and eternal life and glory is theirs for ever and for ever that their sins are all pardoned and done away as if they had never been they see all that is to come as if it were already come unto them they have already as it were what they shall have hereafter even all those joyes riches and pleasures that are in God and therefore they rejoyce even here with unspeakable joy 87. Faith causeth us to read in that Book that is sealed up our names written there and our sins blotted out Faith carries us often up into Heaven even whilst we are here on Earth thus Faith can and thus Faith doth do all things 88. Heaven is Heaven O God because thou raignest See here in some little measure what Heaven is and what Hell is there and Hell is Hell because thou raignest not there Heaven is all good because that thou O God that art all good dwellest there and givest out continually of thy goodness to make them all good and like thy self that are there Hell is all evil because that thou O God that art all good art not there for Hell would not be Hell if thou wert there O God in love it is thy presence that maketh Heaven Heaven and it is thy absence that Hell is Hell Heaven is filled with thy smiles therefore it is Heaven Hell is filled with thy frown and therefore ah therefore it is Hell Heaven is filled with thy love and therefore it is lovely Hell is filled with thy hatred and therefore it is hateful Heaven is free of and from all sin and therefore it is Heaven Hell is full of all sin and therefore ah therefore it is Hell Heaven possesseth O God the light that glorious light of thy most glorious countenance and therefore it is such a most glorious light as cannot be comprehended with darkness but Hell is altogether dispossess'd of thee O God who art this light of Heaven and therefore it is all darkness even black thick darkness Heaven hath always thee O God who art not only holy but holiness who art not only wise but wisdom it self who art not only powerful but power it self who hast not only all things but art all things and therefore Heaven is such a Heaven as it is but Hell hath thee not wherefore it is all sinful wretched and miserable Heaven is Heaven in Heaven yea such a blessed Heaven as it is because thou hast O God blessed it and Hell is cursed yea cursed as it is because thou hast cursed it from thine eternal ever blessed presence They are blessed and shall be ever blessed that are in Heaven because they shall ever live with thee and possess thee O God the God and giver of all blessedness and they are cursed and shall be ever cursed that are in Hell because they live not in thee possess thee not and are not possessed by thee 89. Ah Lord God that art this Heavenly Heaven this light this glory this transcendant incomprehensible glorious light this blessedness this full whole entire compleat and perfect blessedness of all the blessed in glory this holiness this love this most lovely holiness Give me I most humbly beseech thee and unto all thine such a measure of thine infinite grace that we may even here sink into thee and be swallowed up by thee receiving continually grace for grace and be always altogether fully filled
a thing to us here in the flesh whilst we are as it were so far from him or at least seeing him far off so darkly his back parts only Ah how comforting how solacing how transforming to see his transcendent glorious face as he is to be seen and to hear his sweet and sacred voice audibly that we are his and that he is ours And when he shall have cloathed us with his own likeness and have made us in some small measure glorious as he is glorious for we shall then shine in the glory of our head Christ Jesus putting on his glory 132. Ah Lord God be good unto me and grant that through thine infinite fulness and goodness I may fill others that are empty with these thine overflowings wherewith thou hast filled me that I may feed them with this bread and with those dainties wherewith thou hast been pleased so graciously and plentifully to feed me and that I may by communication inrich them with this same impuissable treasure wherewith thou hast now and heretofore enriched my Soul 133. Let me have nothing Ah Lord let me have nothing for my self alone but let me be always ready and willing to give unto others whatsoever it be that thou shall give to me to carry to them forthwith whatever thou thy self shalt bring me to make them partakers of all whatsoever thou shalt make me at any time yea the best of times partaker of that thou givest it unto me when alone yet grant O God 〈…〉 may esteem it as a common gift that is to make it common by giving it freely liberally and cheerfully not repugningly repiningly or repentingly as thine O Lord as thine that we may altogether go hand in hand speaking thy praises and telling of all what ever thou doest for our Souls 134. Whatever God gives his Children what condition soever he brings them into it is intended by him for their advantage and good therefore they should always reâ—oyce for all things for high degree and â—ow degree for health and sickness for apâ—lause and for contempt and scorn and not â—o do as many do endeavour to turn what God intends for their comforts into sorrowâ—g cares and heaviness and say that they â—re not fit for comforts and joys as if God â—new not what were fit or fittest for them How is it to be pitied and lamented and God knows how I pity them and lament for â—em that thus turn his good into evil even â— themselves and their very Souls that is â—ey labour with might and main what in â—em lies to turn his comforts into discomâ—rts his peace into war his smiles into â—wns his joys into sorrowing to change â—s intendments for their good as much as â— them lyeth unto their own hurt should â—e not be glad when we see and plainly perceive that he intends to glad us and rejoyce when that he intends to fill our cup full of joy shall we say Ah God forbid shew me not Heaven yet give me not â— foretast or a foresight of it yet leave mâ— thus alone and come not O God so nigh mâ— with thy comforts for thy smiles and thy most lovely and gracious presence overcomâ— me I would rather thy absence and thâ— frowns for a little space What shall wâ— be sorry for that God is so good unto us and say that he doth us too much good how dare any man choose any condition fâ— himself how dare any man presume â— think that he knoweth what condition best for him and be so bold as to say that contrary condition to that which Gods givâ— him and sends him would be better for him as if God knew not when best to fill us wiâ— joys and when with sorrows and when â— take the one and the other from us If â— sends me always joys I will always rejoycâ— and if he fill me always with sighing aâ— sorrows I am sure he will fit me for thâ— condition also and also in it to make me â— rejoyce Let the Lord do unto me alwaâ— what seemeth him good what he will â— what I will his will not mine be done nâ— henceforth and for evermore Amen 135. Deal with me O God the God of my Salvation as thou pleasest let the Issue of all things be as thou wilt only give me grace in all things to walk uprightly before thee 136. If we have O God so much cause to serve thee for what we have already received how much more for that O Lord which thou hast promised and which we know thou wilt surely give us 137. Ah Lord let me cling to thee as a sucking Child doth to the breast for 't is from thee that I can only suck the milk of consolation nourishment strength and comfort 138. ' T is thee in us and us O Lord in thee That doth from all sin ever make us free 139. O Lord the Heaven of Heaven doth not contain thee only but thou livest also in the lowest hearts of thy Children as well as in the highest Heavens with thy Servants Abraham Isaac and Jacob. 140. O Lord thou knowest that I am content and willing too to lose much as to my self that I may be able to give a little unto others 141. I would rather write a little for others sakes then hear much for my own sake only 142. This loss I have often had and yet I desire rather much by much to be always a loser than a gainer being more others for the most part than mine own for in some measure and for which I desire Eternally to praise thy name I have what I would have and I am sure I shall never lose it 143. Ah how glad am I when I can glad others thou O Lord knowest the great joys I have when thou art pleased to use me as a means to make others to rejoyce 144. When O Lord thou fillest me and then emptiest me as it were into others I account it not emptying but overflowing 145. So that by my loss others might but gain I care not what loss soever I sustain 146. When O Lord thou speakest to the heart thou preparest that is makest the heart fit to speak fitly and preparedly to thee 147. Thy tongue even thine O Lord maketh our hearts and our hands as the pen of a ready writer always ready to speak or to write 148. Thy graces O Lord many times flow into our Souls as the full Sea with a high Tide loftily and sweetly 149. But Ah how is the soul beneap'd and muddy having no pleasantness when the Tide of thy presence is gone out 150. Return O Lord return return unto me to fill me that I may at least be as often filled with thine overflowings as emptied of them by mine own out-goings 151. Ah that I had thee so O Lord as I might always have thee possess thee so as I might always joy in these sweet pleasant and delightfull enjoyments of thy blessed most blessed presence which only comforts and
a natural Father a Father in the flesh is and must be still a Father and a child a child so me thinks it is with God our Heavenly and Spiritual Father he having once begotten us and we are born again and are become his children by the Grace of Adoption Justification and Sanctification he must be still our Father and we his children unto Eternal Salvation Though we do many times as fleshly children not always do the will of their Fathers in the flesh nor please them always not satisfie or delight them nor give them content yet notwithstanding they are still children nor they cannot cease to be children nor their Father to be their Father even so though we do not always do what liketh God our Heavenly Father but that at times which disliketh him and displeaseth him he as a good Father sometimes punisheth us and sometimes passeth by our failings without punishment eyeing what is rest for us and as a Father he never faileth us neither will he suffer us to fail of being his children Once his children and ever his his for ever and for ever 31. Ah Lord God that art so glorious here in Grace how transcendently glorious art thou in Glory If the Earth be so full of thy Glory how full is Heaven O Lord thy dwelling place where thou manifestest thy self unto the Saints and they behold thy beauty and thy glory face to face 32. If thy back parts be so beautiful to our eyes here in the flesh how beautiful Ah how beautiful O Lord will thy glorious countenance be unto us in glory where we shall see thee and know thee as thou art to be known 33. Thy presence even here O Lord God when we have Communion with thee doth so delight and ravish us that we had much rather by much be a door-keeper in thy house be a servant to the meanest of all thy servants than sit on Thrones and rule among the wicked that keep not thy Laws 34. I have O Lord I confess abused thy mercâ—es and do therefore acknowledge that thou mayest justly refuse me all mercies 35. I have walked contrary unto thee O God and still do and therefore I confess that thou mayest justly walk contrary unto me and give me up to do all the evil that is in my heart which is the very greatest of all thy Judgments in this life 36. We are the work of thine hand we are thine own and thou mayest justly do with us all that seemeth good unto thee to do for what is right in thy sight O Lord is just and right and good 37. When the Lord is with us for good then he hath accepted of us he is in us and we are in him one with him and he one with us we as bone of his bone and flesh of his flesh and he as bone of our bone and flesh of our flesh we are not two but one yea there is such an oneness as we are one in some measure in all things and have the same affections for all things loving what is to be loved and hating what is to be hated there is a like purity and no mixture in our choice of good and in our hatred and abhorrency of evil as to the truth and sinceriâ—y of it though much different in the degrees 38. Thus even thus is man made in some measure as God that is God like Thus even thus doth he partake of the holy and Divine Nature of God Thus even thus doth God himself give of himself unto man to make man like himself That man may be satisfied as God is satisfied but differently thus God seeing all things in himself from himself and man seeing what is of God in him is of his free gift from his free Love 39. That is to have a heart according to Gods heart to be always satisfied in all Gods dealings and doings 40. All that God doth is to have his own will accomplisht and done and if our will as it should be according to his will then are we well content in and with all that is done for nothing is done or can be done but that and only that which God will have to be done 41. The honour of all the Saints is Gods honour and their glory is to bring him glory or to glorifie him as the Saints and Angels do in glory 42. Ah Lord God let me as the Bee make honey of the weeds as well as of the flowers fetch good out of evil as well as increase and multiply good from good condemn sin where ever I see it hate it most where I see it most speak most against it when I hear it most spoken for and let the hearing and seeing of grace in others and from others beget more grace in me and let me lay it up as the Bee doth honey in the hive for my self to feed on in the winter of temptation and affliction and that as honey it may be sweet and comfort others also 43. I am resolved O Lord not to be satisfied until I find within me that thou art well and truly satisfied with me and by my whole life and conversation 44. I am O Lord resolved through grace not to be satisfied until I find thy holy Laws so writ on my heart that my heart be according to thy heart and set and bent and resolved entirely and continually and universally in all things to keep thy Law 45. Ah Lord let me so find thee always within me that I may always do the things and only the things that are right in thy sight 46. Let my Love be so true O Lord for thee as I may only love thy truth that truth only in all things may be only lovely unto me 47. Let my goings out be comings in unto me that is Let all O Lord that I do bring me good yea even my falls make me rise and stand the faster relying on thy strength O God my God who only art able to keep me both from stumbling and from falling 48. Watch O Lord watch over my heart continually that I depaat not from thee but that I do the things always that are in some measure according to thy heart 49. The Lord gives his graces unto those that rightly ask them as we would do water at a Fountain unto all those should come for it in a due and right manner give as well a thousand ten thousand yea a hundred times ten thousand draughts to any one that should need it as one draught alone so our God such is his fulness such is his goodness that he gives as well and as willingly all the desires of our hearts and souls as one desire alone yea as the least desire oâ— all if we do but ask as we should ask and for that end or those ends alone that he hath appointed them and us to have them for to give much or little is to him all alike he cannot such a Fountain is he be emptied no nor lessened at
all by whatever he gives he is still the same full of all blessedness and goodness always ready to distribute and give unto the necessity of the Saints never weary nor standing still yesterday to day and to morrow and for ever the same 50. Therefore to have much is to ask much ask and ye shall have that your joy may be full God doth not say or mean that we may or can be too bold that we may ask too much And to take away this scruple or doubt he promiseth that what ever we shall ask believingly in the name of Jesus Christ we shall receive if we open our mouths wide then we have his promise that he will fill them which implies that the way or means to have much is to ask much this holy Coveting and Ambition he is well pleased with and so good bountiful and free our God is that we cannot please him better than after what ever we have asked to believe that he will give us much more by much than we are able to ask or think whoever lacks Wisdom if he ask it of God he will give it liberally for he upbraids no man neither is he a respecter of persons having given us Jesus Christ his only Son the Son of his love and delight how shall he not with him give us all things 51. Surely surely seeing he hath and daily doth give us such things as these Himself his Son and holy Spirit we may be sure we shall as Abraham did be weary or leave asking or God will leave giving for weary he cannot be fit then thy self to be filled and I promise and assure thee who ever thou art thou shalt not be sent empty away what ever thy hunger and thirst be whatever thy coveting and ambition be thou shalt have to fill thee to satisfie thee yea over and above what ever thou canst ask or think believe for all things are possible yea easie for him to do 52. The life which delighteth the Lord and which he would have us to live is to live unto all holiness and godliness every day even as we would do if we knew it to be our last day yea to live every moment of the day all our days as if it were our very last moment 53. The death of the Righteous every one seemingly desires to dye but truly I may say of the most that thus say be they whoever they be that they know not well what they say because that perhaps not one of a thousand but denyes it in his deeds for the death of the Righteous in which the Lord delighteth as in their life and which honours him most even as a holy and godly that is God-like life doth I say this death of the Righteous is as I take it to dye daily yea every moment of the day to all sin even to all both great and small in thought in word and deed to dye thus is to honour glorifie and dignifie more the Lord than to dye any temporal death on the Rack in the flames of fire or to be buried alive c. 'T is not with these Ah not with these Sacrifices of our fleshly lives but with those Sacrifices of our Lusts Corruptions and sinful affections that God is well pleased refreshed as it were and delighted These Sacrifices send up sweet Odours in his Nostrils these are pretious in his eyes I thus thus doubtless it is that the death of the Saints are pretious in the eyes of the Lord to put to death those cruel ones those Enemies of our Eternal life of our souls salvation that put to death the Lord of life and glory himself in his manhood this is to be valiant for the Lord to do wonders or wonderfully to fight well his battels and to help the Lord as it were against the mighty Ah how is he delighted that we will avenge our selves thus on his Enemies and spare none alive but as Samuel did hew Agag the King himself in pieces this is to be jealous for the Lord with a godly jealousie and to have our love for the Almighty to be as hot as fire Ah thus thus if we pull out our right eyes and cut off our right hands we shall be sure to enter into life but not maimed but whole and entire And he that is thus willing to lose his life shall save it and he that will spare or save his life that is his life of sin or fleshly life to live in and commit sin shall surely lose his life both Spiritual Temporal and Eternal 54. He that thus dyes all the day long all his life long dyes much more gloriously by much in the eyes of the Lord God and in the eyes of all his enlightened Children than if he did suffer in the flesh constantly all his dayes the cruellest death of any of all the Martyrs Ah to suffer thus is to suffer truly is to suffer rightly for the cause of Christ and the honour of the Gospel for 't is not Ah no our outward sufferings in the flesh that delighteth the Lord for he is a God oâ— joy and would that we did always rejoyce and is there any other thing that we do oâ— can do that gives us so much cause to rejoyce as to be delivered but of the hands of all our Enemies and to see them lye slaiâ— before our eyes as the Egyptians Ah then then may we serve him without fear then and thereby do we serve the Lord in Righteousness and true Holiness and he that is thus faithful unto the death to put sin to death every moment of his life shall be sure in the end of his dayes to have the full end of all his desires and to wear for ever the Crown of Eternal life he that thus fights shall overcome he that thus suffers no sin to raign in his mortal body shall raign with Christ in bliss and glory world without end Amen Amen 55. Thus then to live and thus do dye is to be sure we shall live with Christ Eternally 56. He that doth live thus and thus puts sin to death lives that life and dyes that death daily as most of all honours God and which brings him most glory which is the thing only or the only thing as I suppose that all Gods Children most desire and long for in this life 57. He that thus lives shall ever live and he that thus puts sin to death is past from death to life and shall never see death that is the power of death to terrifie him for death is swallowed up into Victory death when it comes shall carry him in triumph yea triumphantly into the blessed arms of his blessed Jesus who hath thus redeemed him from Hell from sin and from death to live ever with himself in bliss and glory an Eternal life 58. When I shall find that sin is thus put to death in me then will I say boldly that the Lord hath sent his destroying Angel to do it that he
hath done it with the word of his power with his own voice who is that blessed Arch-Angel of the Covenant of peace and reconciliation 59. When I shall find that sin is thus rooted up in me by the roots then will I say that the Lords hand hath done it for I know that none but the Lord himself can do such wonders and work wonderfully thus 60. When I shall find that sin is destroyed in me then will I say that the Lord hath visited me graciously that he hath spoken peace to my poor soul and revived it and refreshed it then may I say he hath been with me of a truth and not regarded the low estate of his poor Servant 61. When I shall find sin dead then will I say as the Lord liveth and because he was put to death and now liveth I shall live also 62. Sin being thus banisht and cast out then shall I see my self free and taken O Lord into Covenant with thee then will I say I am no longer under the Law but under Grace which gracious favour O Lord do me that I may henceforth and for ever live unto and for thine Eternal honour and glory 63. Ah Lord God that wert fastned to the Cross for my sins and to save my poor Soul fasten my sins there and let them never get loose again and Ah Lord let my Soul live ever in thee and possess thee ever 64. Ah Lord that raignest over all Principalities and Powers raign I most humbly beseech thee over all these Princes and Powers that have Dominion over me that I may be brought into subjection unto thy most holy Laws and live obediently keeping all thy Divine Commandments That thou O Lord God who art God over all blessed for ever and for ever mayest be my God ever over all and bless me also for ever and for ever that I may ever live in thee and thou in me Amen Amen 65. If we be so willing to unstrip our selves of our cloathing at night and lye down on our beds naked to uncloath our selves of all our glory and honour pomp and beauty and to unmind that we are what we are to the end we may enjoy a few hours quiet and rest Ah how willing shall we be to unstrip our selves of all that we possess and of our lives too when that last long night of death shall come and appear to fetch us up from hence that we may be ever with the Lord who is our Eternal and everlasting Portion our infinite and incomprehensible good and blessed rest and peace which shall be as it were ever beginning and never end nor cease 66. Ah our God that art what thou art and yet wilt be pleased to be ours and to own us for thine own 67. Ah Lord God though others satisfie themselves to hear of thee let me not be satisfied till mine eye see thee 68. Though others O Lord be well contented to know thee as men teach Let me I beseech thee be satisfied only with thine own teachings to know thee as thou art to be known that is to see and find and feel thee in me dwelling raigning and ruling there being all in all and bringing into subjection all powers that lift up themselves in me against thee 69. Ah Lord God how much better is it thus to have thee than to have all things out of thee as the Corn Wine and Oyl of the World 70. What Ah what is Earth to Heaven these things below to the things that are above but as pebbles to pearls as dross to gold or as a shadow to the most glorious and most sublime substance 71. The one being life the other death the one fully satisfies the other is vain and brings nothing but vexation of Spirit with it 72. We cannot know God till we altogether forget our selves we cannot hear God till we are altogether deaf to our selves and to all things out of God we cannot see God till we are stark blind to all things besides him and that is not of him we cannot find God as he is untill we have lost our selves and all things else that concerns him not so do and prosper 73. As we know not our latter end nor are not able to number our days so are we not at all able to tell what God is unless he tell us nor to hear him unless he open our hearts and give us understanding nor comprehend him until he hath made us one with himself and given us his own Spirit to know him by 74. Thus if we live to move after his call and be obedient unto his voice we shall so hear that our Souls shall live and for ever rejoyce that we live thus to obey him 75. Ah Lord God Almighty maker of Heaven and Earth thou art the all of all those that know thee they that know thee O God as thou art to be known care to know nothing else thou art altogether alsufficient to content and satisfie them with all pleasures and delights their joys are full when that they enjoy thee And they then say with Jacob that they have all and with David desire nothing else either in Heaven above or Earth beneath Their wills are so swallowed up into thine that they are not theirs but thine and thus to live to thee and in thee they count it only to live and out of thee to be as if they were not as if they had no being 76. I am a Creature but thy Creature O Lord my God I am a man but created for thy self for thy glory and my Everlasting good and happiness and shall I know that I am thus such a one and not be satisfied for is there any thing else that can satisfie me thus 77. Ah Lord thou settest before me life and death good and evil light and darkness Heaven and Earth the things above and the things below Ah suffer me not I most humbly beseech thee in Jesus Christ to prefer pebbles to pearls dross to gold darkness to light death to life evil to good Earth to Heaven these low things here below to those high and most transcendent glorious things above But let me give my self to thee O God that hast provided and given such rich rare and pretious things to me enjoying them let me not care seek for or mind these having thee let me be fully satisfied and rejoyce evermore with unspeakable joy 78. Being thy favorite O God who art King of kings and Lord of lords living in thy fear and favour shall I not rejoyce much more by much than they do or can do that are but favourites to men and have but their favour they shall all pass away but thee and thy word of grace ingrafted in me shall endure for ever and for ever 79. Ah Lord God pour out of thy self into me more and more that I may be made to rejoyce always with unspeakable joy yea that my joys may be full 80. Let mâ— O Lord rejoyce much more
thee and what is there on all the Earth in comparison of thee all other joys are false joys and all other things are nothing but meer toyes for with thee O God and only with thee is all joy unspeakable joy and everlasting pleasures are at thy right hand 169. Ah Lord our God thou art all in all things for without thy presence the best and the greatest things are nothing to that Soul that knoweth thee what thou art 170. Thou art O God the sweet of all sweets the light of the light the glory and the bliss in glory As in thy presence is all joy So in thy absence is all sorrow to all Souls that are acquainted with thee and to whom thou hast manifested thy self Therefore the Angels those glorious knowing Creatures endeavour to pry into all thy mysteries Such an endless and bottomless delight there is in them all from the greatest to the very least of all 171. This indeed is such a high and glorious Mount from which we may justly desire never to come down but to have there our abiding place A Tabernacle to dwell in for ever and for ever not only to behold the glory of our Lord but the Lord himself of all our good and our glory 172. Ah Lord God that art the wisdom of the wise the strength of the strong the honour of the honourable the power of the powerful the might of the mighty the riches of the rich the goodness of those that are good the blessedness of the blessed the beauty of the beautiful the joy of those that rejoyce the light of those that see thy light the Crown and the glory of those that are in glory Thou only art and there is none besides thee our God even God blessed for ever and for ever 173. Ah Lord I know and am assured that it cannot be better with me than to be with thee 174. And to be with thee here on Earth whilst on Earth thou knowest O God that I esteem it to be my only Heaven 175. Let me thus have thee I say always have thee thus and thou knowest O Lord that knowest all things that I have all that I would have for thou only art all mine all 176. Ah that thou wouldst O God take all things from me that hinder thy blessed approach to me and that cause me to draw back from thee 177. Ah Lord thou knowest that there is nothing that I have but I most willingly offer thee and would cheerfully give thee to have thee 178. My life is not dear to me at all to spend for thee thou knowest O God my God that I account it a thing of nought If thou wilt have it O God take it for I confess it 's thine and not mine 179. Yea I trust that all mine is thine that I am thine all both Spirit Soul and Body and that thee O God and all thine is mine both thy Kingdom power and glory for ever and for ever 180. Ah blessed change to be thus changed into all blessedness even so as to have the Lord God for our everlasting Portion 181. Weary me O Lord God weary me more and more of my self that I may be dissolved and be with thee which is best of all 182. For out of thee O God my Heart is not satisfied neither can any thing but thy self satisfie it either that is in Heaven above or on the Earth below 183. What O Lord what shall I say unto thee thou knowest all things and of me and my Heart more than I can tell thee make me and it O God such as thou wilt have me to be that thou maiest ever own me for thy own 184. Ah Lord Let me be always on the wing after thee yea let me pursue hard after thee continually let me run and not grow weary and walk and not faint 185. O God that art my God heat I beseech thee my affections increase my desires build me up that I may be a living stone in thy house and ever speak loudly thy praises 186. Ah Lord God let me always have before me Heaven and Hell let me see Heaven as it is prepared for the Just and Hell as it is prepared for the unjust Heaven for those that ever eyed it and rejoyced in it and Hell for those that never feared it nor believed it but by their ungodly lives lived as if there had not been either a Heaven to recompence the Godly or a Hell to punish the ungodly 187. Ah Lord cause me always to eye those things that are invisible that eye never saw that ear never heard nor that ever entred at any time into the heart of any man to conceive even those endless everlasting joys that thou hast O God prepared in Jesus Christ and laid up for all those that love thee 188. Let me Ah let me always harken to hear that sweet and blessed voice of thy Holy Spirit within me saying of all the glory that is in glory these are all thine yea all that is mine is thine and thou art mine 189. Ah Lord let me never forget that all these earthly things must pass away us in a moment in the twinkling of an eye But that our Souls are immortal and shall live for ever and ever in endless unexpressible joys or endless everlasting unexpressible Torments 190. How low Ah how low are the conceptions of any brain yea the words of Men or Angels to express and shew forth the life to come either of the one or of the other of those beloved of God that shall ever live and abide in his Love which is in himself or for those that are so hated by him as shall for ever be cast out of his blessed presence and enjoy the cursed wretched company of the Devils and his Angels in burning and unquenchable flames where shall be yelling and roaring weeping and wailing curses and horrid blasphemies against that God and his goodness which they know is holy just and good and this as fuel shall feed that fire that cannot be quenched and give life to that gnawing worm an accusing condemning Conscience that shall never dye and thus those poor Souls must and shall live everlastingly 191. Ah Lord God give me Faith to believe and grace to repent that I come not into this place of torment but for ever enjoy those eternal and everlasting joys that thou hast from all Eternity prepared and wilt only give unto those for whom thou hast prepared it 192. Come Lord Jesus come quickly and fill me and feed me and satisfie me here with thy good things that I may ever live to enjoy them and thee 193. Thy appearances O great God are like thy self yea they are thy self but few I fear there are that thus see them and know them thus thy power thou shewest most in weakness in such as see confess and acknowledge themselves to be weak for thou makest the weak strong and causest many times the very meanest and simplest even those
is so hot that a whole world of gold would be given for a drop of water and yet it is so cold as will make thee for ever to weep and wail and gnash thy teeth But it may be thou wilt not believe it till thou hast felt it if thou art such a fool and such an Enemy to thy own soul to thine own peril be it I can and do assure thee on my souls salvation that then it will be too late and thou shalt find no place to repent in how many tears soever thou sheddest wherefore whilst it is day hear the voyce of the Lord who wooes thee to come unto him that thou mayest have life and be no longer a neglecter of so great Salvation as is so freely offered unto thee and quench not the spirit in thee no longer which if thou wilt but now repent and leave for ever thy sins thou shall find mercy and he will seal it to thy heart and Conscience unto the day of Redemption awake then thou that sleepest and arise from the dead and Christ shall give thee life But know that if thou neglectest it and wilt put it off till the morrow know that there is no to morrow in all the Scripture 't is to day if thou wilt hear his voice harden not thy heart and consider how nigh this day may be past and how nigh the night may be at hand wherein no man shall work The Lord speak so effectually to thy dry obdurate rocky heart that it may so hear as thy soul may live and that these words may prove a savour of death to all thy sins and of life unto thy poor Soul Death to all that are in Christ is a day of Harvest of reaping gathering and gain it will be to him a day of Espousals she shall be married unto the fairest Bridegroom that ever was Absolom's Beauty will be blackness and uncomeliness to his to the richest that ever was Solomon's riches will be but as Job's poverty compared to his And to the most highest in honour that ever was being King of kings and Lord of lords to him all Kings shall fall and cast their Crowns at his feet Death to a true believer is the best of all things because it brings him to possess all things yea to possess Christ himself who is the giver of all things and much better than all things much by much A Soul in Christ is always ready to meet and imbrace death at midnight or mid-day at the Cock-crowing or any other time he hath his life as it were in his hand always ready and willing to lay it down or give it up to him that gave it him and redeemed it he accounts nothing his own but all Christs and that he hath all things both in Heaven and Earth having him When Death is ready to carry us into the arms of Christ the Ark of our peace and rest then the Devil many times rageth most against us But Christ our Captain and deliverer who will save us to the utmost as the Lyon of the Tribe of Judah roareth against him and forceth him to a trembling and yielding retreat But to Saints our Christ appears as a Lamb meek and pacified yea as the Lamb of God that taketh away all our sins that he may present us spotless and unblameable unto his Father that we may as Children and Coheirs with himself receive a Crown incorruptible and the inheritance prepared for us from all Eternity Death to us that are dead to sin and alive to Christ hath no sting and therefore cannot in the least do us any harm wherefore we cherish him and as a dear friend are glad to hear of him and so think often on him and when he comes we bid him most heartily welcome entertain him kindly and lodge him in our bosoms But to those that know not Christ his Master and have no interest in him nor his mark on their foreheads he comes in flames of fire and as a most cruel Executioner to execute on them the direful and eternal doom of God and so carries them post and headlong to Hell delivering them into the hands and power of their grand Enemy the Devil to be tormented in everlasting burning world without end or for ever and for ever Death Ah how comely art thou in the sight of all Gods Children that art sent by him to bring them to see him their King Lord and Master that have so long desired to see this day and thy delightsome countenance thou art most welcome and dear as the most dearest Brother come in thou Messenger of the most Highest I know what thou hast to say unto me thou bringest me the gladdest tidings that ever I heard I am ready to go with thee when thou wilt I shall be now soon brought to my long desired home to my everlasting habitation of repose and rest Now my Soul thou shalt be no longer perplext nor troubled all sighing for sin and fear of sinning shall flie away now is that blessed day come wherein thou shalt at once have all thy Prayers answered all thy desires petitions and suits granted and ten thousand times ten thousand more than ever thou didst ask or think now thou shalt sin grieve nor offend thy God no more but evermore serve honour obey and please him Now thou shalt see him who created thee God the Father him who redeemed thee Jesus Christ the Son and him who so often comforted thee and hath sanctified thee the Holy Ghost the blessed Spirit three in one and one in three which is a great mystery but most true Ah happy they unto whom it hath been manifestly manifested such have Eternal life and therefore fear not death But to the wicked that fee and know themselves out of Christ death is to all such the King of Terrors they dread and fear him more than all the Kings Tyrants Torments and Tormentors in the World nay than the Devil himself for 't is by death that they are sent or brought to keep company for ever one with another 't is death carries them to that infernal habitation that throws them headlong into that Lake of fire and brimstone into that bottomless pit of black thick darkness which may be felt that binds them in fetters so strong as none is able to deliver them and then flies swifter than the wind from them resolving which they know never to return to deliver them and this later woe for ever to abide so is the greatest of all this sinks their hearts and hopes into an everlasting despair which most of all makes death dreadful to them and they would much rather lye under the greatest rocks or mountains or be cast with a milstone about their necks into the bottom of the Sea But it cannot be death will execute his part of the doom pronounced against them by him that judgeth wisely righteously and justly and that spake as never man spake A Prayer MOst High most Holy most
knowledge to know thee the true God and Jesus Christ whom thou hast sent which thou hast I praise thee in some measure caused me to know to my Everlasting comfort thus even thus I am sure O God is thy good will and pleasure that I Communicate and forget not what thou hast in so much love Communicated unto me impart unto them all that thou hast imparted unto me And I praise thy goodness O God for that thou hast given me a heart in some measure heartily to desire it and longingly and lovingly to embrace with much comfort joy and content all occasions whatsoever to do it unto all without any respect of Persons to the poorest and meanest Creature according to the flesh as well as unto the highest in degree and honour among men and that their Conditions blessed be thy Name makes no condition with me for I account my self in very truth Servant and Debtor unto all both bond and free young and old and would with all my heart and soul do for any of them what thou requirest and commandest yea methiâ—ks I would give them what I have and be without it that they might have it I would be hungry and thirsty and poor and naked to feed refresh cloath and make rich their souls I would most sincerely and willingly that they had all of them a double Portion of the gifts and graces of thy holy Spirit which thou hast given me to the end it might be well with them and they might doubly praise thee Ah Lord Stamp on their hearts the seal of thy Divine love hide them under thy most sacred and glorious pavilion that they may be kept safe from the evil day and from the evil one who continually seeketh to devour them swallow them up O Lord into thy self that they may be ever secure dart O God a beam of thy Divine love that by its reflection they may have love to love thee again as thou lovest them not as to measure or degree that I know well is in none either on earth or in Heaven nor cannot be the most blessed Saints Angels Archangels Cherubins and Seraphims were the love of all those lovely blessed and glorious Creatures emptied into one alone then even I know his would come short of thine of thy love O God to that Creature whom thou lovest in the least degree to Salvation for thy love is the love of a God who is love that would be but the love of a Creature thine would be from thy self alone that would be from thee and given by thee so that the love which in sincere love I thus in Jesus Christ beg of thee for them is that they may have true love for thee and thine continually that it may continue with them and in them unto the end till that thou shalt so fill them with that first choice and chief grace that they all may be as thou art in a degree all love Ah Lord God confound I pray thee the wisdom of the wise I mean thou knowest the worldly wise bring down their pride and stain their glory such as will go about to condemn what they cannot mend and to marr what they cannot make turn O God their wisdom as thou did'st Achitophel's into foolishness but preserve them unto the end from such a like end and open the eyes of their understanding that they may see and acknowledge the errors of their ways and come speedily out of them and before ever converted unto thee that their souls may ever live with thee Ah Lord God what a most pitiful thing is it and of all things to be lamented with and in tears of blood that any poor soul should either live or dye in sin that a soul which is of much more value than ten thousand worlds should be for ever lost and undone for such a base vile filthy thing as is sin the very excrements of naughtiness and by which O God thou that art worthy of all honour art so much dishonoured and the Devil so much honoured Ah how is it to be pittied and dolefully lamented that so many poor souls should believe lyes and the Father of lyes the Devil before thy word and thy self who art the God of all truth and love how great Ah how great was thy love O God to save poor lost sinners in sparing and giving thy own only dear and beloved Son to the most shameful and most painful death of the Cross to redeem them from sin death Hell and the Devil and hast thou not promised with him to give them all things And Ah how great was thy love O most sweet Jesus who did'st so willingly submit to thy Fathers will and for the glory which was set before thee for us sinners did'st cheerfully endure the Cross and despise the shame and so sits down at the right hand of thy Father to prepare there a place for us and by thy continual intercession to prepare us for that place and this thy sitting down in glory at his right hand shews plain that thou hast done all that is to be done that can be required all as thou said'st when thou gavest up the Ghost is surely finished our Redemption fully wrought and compleated thy Fathers wrath appeased and he well pleased Ah Christ with and in all humility of heart I speak it thou had'st this spirit in thee thou did'st even as it were thus complain ye will not come to me that ye may have life and did'st weep for and over Jerusalem because her day of salvation was past and thy holy spirit in the mouth of thy Prophet complaineth and as it were lamenteth their sad condition saying Ah why will you dye O House of Israel And further how often doth this thy gracious and blessed spirit O God leave as it were thy bosome and comes and sues and wooes us that he may sanctifie and make us chosen and fit Vessels for thy use Ah Lord thou knowest how often such like considerations have sadened my soul that thou who art the God of truth should'st be thought by so many as it were a lyer for thy Word is not believed by them but made as a thing of nought trampled under foot and cast behind the back and Drunkards Whoremongers and such vile persons words be received entertain'd taken up welcom'd and preferr'd before thee O God before thee and thy Word and all thy most gracious offers of grace Now if such by thy good and gracious Providene come to read these words or of that which thou hast made me to write I humbly pray thee in Jesus Christ thy Son to pity him and pardon him Ah fetch home O God all wandering Prodigals that are in far Countries that is far from thee seeding on Hogs and Harlots which is on their own fleshly Carnal Lusts and vile affections Ah Father I know thee to be full of love and compassion Ah be thou pleased to do for all such as thou hast done for me for such was