fall by his owne vice Or be the lesse a friend cause vertue needs him Wit Vertue shall never aske my succours twice Most friend most man your Counsells are commands Lady I can love goodnesse in you more Then I did Beauty and doe here intitle Your vertue to the power upon a life You shall engage in any faithfull service Even to forfeit Mer. Madame Do you heare Sir We have another leg-strain'd for this Dottrel He'ha's a quarrell to carry and ha's caus'd A deed of Feoffment of his whole estate To be drawne yonder ha'st within And you Only he meanes to make Feoffee H 'is falne So desperatly enamour'd on you and talkes Most like a mad-man you did never heare A Phrentick so in love with his owne favour Now you doe know 't is of no validity In your name as you stand Therefore advise him To put in me h 'is come here You shall share Sir Act. IV. Scene VII. Wittipoll Mistresse Fitz-dottrel Manly Meere-craft Fitz-dottrell Ever-ill Plutarchus FIT. Madame I have a sute to you and a fore-hand I doe bespeake you you must not deny me I will be graunted Wit Sir I must know it though Fit No Lady you must not know it yet you must too For the trust of it and the fame indeed Which else were lost me I would use your name But in a Feoffment make my whole estate Over unto you a trifle a thing of nothing Some eighteene hundred Wit Alas I understand not Those things Sir I am a woman and most loath To embarque my selfe Fit You will not slight me madame Wit Nor you 'll not quarrell me Fit No sweet madame I have Already a dependance for which cause I doe this let me put you in deare madame I may be fairely kill'd Wit You have your friends Sir About you here for choice Eve She tells you right Sir Fit Death if she doe what doe I care for that Say I would have her tell me wrong Wit Why Sir If for the trust you 'll let me have the honor To name you one Fit Nay you doe me honor madame Who is 't Wit This Gentleman Fit O no sweet madame H 'is friend to him with whom I ha' the dependance Wit O might he be Fit One Wittipol do you know him Wit Alas Sir he a toy This Gentleman A friend to him no more then I am Sir Fit But will your Ladiship undertake that madame Wit Yes and what else for him you will engage me Fit What is his name Wit His name is Eustace Manly Fit Whence do's he write himselfe Wit Of Middle-sex Esquire Fit Say nothing madame Clerke come hether Write Eustace Manly Squire o' Middle-sex Mer. What ha' you done Sir Wit Nam'd a gentleman That I 'll be answerable for to you Sir Had I nam'd you it might ha' beene suspected This way 't is safe Fit Come Gentlemen your hands For witnes Man What is this Eve You ha' made Election Of a most worthy Gentleman Man Would one of worth Had spoke it whence it comes it is Rather a shame to me then a praise Eve Sir I will give you any Satisfaction Man Be silent then falshood commends not truth Plu. You do deliver this Sir as your deed To th' use of Mr. Manly Fit Yes and Sir When did you see yong Wittipol I am ready For processe now Sir this is Publication He shall heare from me he would needs be courting My Wife Sir Man Yes So witnesseth his Cloake there Fit Nay good Sir Madame you did undertake What. What Fit That he was not Wittipols friend Wit I heare Sir no confession of it Fit O she knows not Now I remember madame This young Wittipol Would ha' debauch'd my wife and made me Cuckold Through a casement he did fly her home To mine owne window but I thinke I sou't him And ravish'd her away out of his pownces I ha' sworne to ha' him by the eares I fear The toy wi' not do me right Wit No that were pitty What right doe you aske Sir Here he is will do 't you Fit Ha Wittipol Wit I Sir no more Lady now Nor Spaniard Man No indeed 't is Wittipol Fit Am I the thing I feard'd Wit A Cuckold No Sir But you were late in possibility I 'll tell you so much Man But your wife 's too vertuous Wit Wee 'll see her Sir at home and leave you here To be made Duke o'Shore-ditch with a project Fit Theeves ravishers Wit Crie but another note Sir I 'll marre the tune o' your pipe Fit Gi' me my deed then Wit Neither that shall be kept for your wives goood Who will know better how to use it Fit Ha' To feast with my land Wit Sir be you quiet Or I shall gag you ere I goe consult You Master of dependances how to make this A second businesse you have time Sir Fit Oh! What will the ghost of my wise Grandfather My learned Father with my worshipfull Mother Thinke of me now that left me in this world In state to be their Heire that am become A Cuckold and an Asse and my wives Ward Likely to lose my land ha' my throat cut All by her practice Mer. Sir we are all abus'd Fit And be so still Who hinders you I pray you Let me alone I would injoy my selfe And be the Duke o' Dround'd-Land you ha' made me Mer. Sir we must play an after-game o' this Fit But I am not in case to be a Gam-ster I tell you once againe Mer. You must be rul'd And take some counsell Fit Sir I doe hate counsell As I doe hate my wife my wicked wife Mer. But we may thinke how to recover all If you will act Fit I will not think nor act Nor yet recover do not talke to me I 'll runne out o' my witts rather then heare I will be what I am Fabian Fitz dottrel Though all the world say nay to 't Mer. Let 's follow him Act. V. Scene I. Ambler Pitfall Mere-craft BUt ha's my Lady mist me Pit Beyond telling Here has been that infinity of strangers And then she would ha 'had you to ha' sampled you With one within that they are now a teaching And do's pretend to your ranck Amb. Good fellow Pit-fall Tel Mr. Meer-craft I intreat a word with him This most unlucky accident will goe neare To be the losse o' my place I am in doubt Mer. With me what say you Mr. Ambler Amb. Sir I would beseech your worship stand betwene Me and my Ladies displeasure for my absence Mer. O is this all I warrant you Amb. I would tell you Sir But how it happnened Mer. Briefe good Mr. Ambler Put your selfe to your rack for I have a tasque Of more importance Amb. Sir you 'll laugh at me But so is Truth a verie friend of mine Finding by conference with me that I liv'd Too chast for my complexion and indeed Too honest for my place Sir did
Under your favour friend for I 'll not quarrell I look'd o' your feet afore you cannot coozen me Your shoo 's not cloven Sir you are whole hoof'd Pug. Sir that 's a popular error deceives many But I am that I tell you Fit What 's your name Pug. My name is Divell Sir Fit Sai'st thou true Pug. Indeed Sir Fit 'Slid there 's some omen i'th is what countryman Pug. Of Derby-shire Sir about the Peake Fit That Hole Belong'd to your Ancestors Pug. Yes Divells arse Sir Fit I 'll entertaine him for the name sake Ha And turne away my tother man and saue Foure pound a yeere by that there 's luck and thrift too The very Divell may come hereafter as well Friend I receive you but withall I acquaint you Aforehand if yo'offend mee I must beat you It is a kind of exercise I use And cannot be without Pug. Yes if I doe not Offend you can sure Fit Faith Divell very hardly I 'll call you by your surname 'cause I love it Act. I. Scene IIII Ingine Wittipol Manly Fitzdottrell Pug. YOnder he walkes Sir I 'll goe lift him for you Wit To him good Ingine raise him up by degrees Gently and hold him there too you can doe it Shew your selfe now a Mathematicall broker Ing. I 'll warrant you for halfe a piece Wit 'T is done Sir Man Is 't possible there should be such a man Wit You shall be your owne witnesse I 'll not labour To tempt you past your faith Man And is his wife So very handsome say you Wit I ha' not seene her Since I came home from travell and they say Shee is not alter'd Then before I went I saw her once but so as she hath stucke Still i' my view no object hath remov'd her Man 'T is a faire guest Friend beauty and once lodg'd Deepe in the eyes she hardly leaves the Inne How do's he keepe her Wit Very brave However Himselfe be sordide he is sensuall that way In every dressing he do's study her Man And furnish forth himselfe so from the Brokers Wit Yes that 's a hyr'd suite he now has on To see the Divell is an Asse to day in This Ingine gets three or foure pound a weeke by him He dares not misse a new Play or a Feast What rate soever clothes be at and thinkes Himselfe still new in other mens old Man But stay Do's he love meat so Wit Faith he do's not hate it But that 's not it His belly and his palate Would be compounded with for reason Mary A wit he has of that strange credit with him 'Gainst all mankinde as it doth make him doe Just what it list it ravishes him forth Whither it please to any assembly or place And would conclude him ruin'd should he scape One publike meeting out of the beliefe He has of his owne great and Catholike strengths In arguing and discourse It takes I see H' has got the cloake upon him Fit A faire garment By my faith Ingine Ing. It was never made Sir For threescore pound I assure you 'T will yeeld thirty The plush Sir cost three pound ten shillings a yard And then the lace and velvet Fit I shall Ingine Be look'd at prettily in it Art thou sure The Play is play'd to day Ing. ô here 's the bill Sir I had forgot to gi 't you Fit Ha the Divell I will not loose you Sirah But Ingine thinke you The Gallant is so furious in his folly So mad upon the matter that he 'll part With 's cloake upo' those termes Ing. Trust not your Ingine Breake me to pieces else as you would doe A rotten Crane or an old rusty Iacke That has not one true wheele in him Doe but talke with him Fit I shall doe that to satisfie you Ingine And my selfe too With your leave Gentlemen Which of you is it is so meere Idolater To my wives beauty and so very prodigall Unto my patience that for the short parlee Of one swift houres quarter with my wife He will depart with let me see this cloake here The price of folly Sir are you the man Wit I am that vent'rer Sir Fit Good time your name Is Witty-pol Wit The same Sir Fit And 't is told me Yo'have travell'd lately Wit That I have Sir Fit Truly Your travells have alter'd your complexion But sure your wit stood still Wit It may well be Sir All heads ha'not like growth Fit The good mans gravity That left you land your father never taught you These pleasant matches Wit No nor can his mirth With whom I make 'hem put me off Fit You are Resolv'd then Wit Yes Sir Fit Beauty is the Saint You 'll sacrifice your selfe into the shirt too Wit So I may still cloth and keepe warme your wisdome Fit You lade me Sir Wit I know what you will beare Sir Fit Well to the point 'T is only Sir you say To speake unto my wife Wit Only to speake to her Fit And in my presence Wit In your very presence Fit And in my hearing Wit In your hearing so You interrupt us not Fit For the short space You doe demand the fourth part of an houre I think I shall with some convenient study And this good helpe to boot bring my selfe to 't Wit I aske no more Fit Please you walk to'ard my house Speake what you list that times yours My right I have departed with But not beyond A minute or a second looke for Length And drawing out ma'advance much to these matches And I except all kissing Kisses are Silent petitions still with willing Lovers Wit Lovers How falls that o' your phantsie Fit Sir I doe know somewhat I forbid all lip-worke Wit I am not eager at forbidden dainties Who covets unfit thinks denies him selfe Fit You say well Sir 'T was prettily said that same He do's indeed I 'll have no touches therefore Nor takings by the armes nor tender circles Cast 'bout the wast but all be done at distance Love is brought up with those soft migniard handlings His pulse lies in his palme and I defend All melting joynts and fingers that 's my bargaine I doe defend 'hem any thing like action But talke Sir what you will Use all the Tropes And Schemes that Prince Quintilian can afford you And much good do your Rhetoriques heart You are welcome Sir Ingine God b'w'you Wit Sir I must condition To have this Gentleman by a witnesse Fit Well I am content so he be silent Man Yes Sir Fit Come Divell I 'll make you roome streight But I 'll shew you First to your Mistresse who 's no common one You must conceive that brings gaine to see her I hope thou 'st brought me good lucke Pug. I shall do 't Sir Act. I. Scene V. Wittipol Manly INgine you hope o' your halfe piece 'T is there Sir Be gone Friend Manly who 's within here fixed Man I am directly in a fit of wonder what 'll be the
I 'd rather fall Fit ô they whisper they whisper whisper c. We shall have more of Divells a score To come to dinner in me the sinner Eyt. Alas poore Gentleman Pou. Put 'hem asunder Keepe 'hem one from the other Man Are you phrenticke Sir Or what grave dotage moves you to take part With so much villany we are not afraid Either of law or tryall let us be Examin'd what our ends were what the meanes To worke by and possibility of those meanes Doe not conclude against us ere you heare us Pou. I will not heare you yet I will conclude Out of the circumstances Man Will you so Sir Pou. Yes they are palpable Man Not as your folly Pou. I will discharge my conscience and doe all To the Meridian of Iustice Gui. You doe well Sir Fit Provide me to eate three or foure dishes o'good meat I 'll feast them and their traines a Iustice head and braines Shall be the first Pou. The Divell loves not Iustice There you may see Fit A spare-rib o' my wife And a whores purt'nance a Guilt-head whole Pou. Be not you troubled Sir the Divell speakes it Fit Yes wis Knight shite Poule Ioule owle foule troule boule Pou. Crambe another of the Divell's games Mer. Speake Sir some Greeke if you can Is not the Iustice A solemne gamester Eve Peace Fit {non-Roman} {non-Roman} {non-Roman} {non-Roman} {non-Roman} {non-Roman} {non-Roman} {non-Roman} {non-Roman} Pou. Hee curses In Greeke I thinke Eve Your Spanish that I taught you Fit Qu brémosel ojo de burlas Eve How your rest Let 's breake his necke in jest the Divell saies Fit Di gratia Signòr mio se baúete denári fataméne parte Mer. What would the Divell borrow money Fit Ouy Ouy Monsiur ùn pà uure Diable Diablet in Pou. It is the Divell by his severall languages Sha. Where 's Sir Paule Either-side Pou. Here what 's the matter Sha. O! such an accident falne out at Newgate Sir A great piece of the prison is rent downe The Divell has beene there Sir in the body Of the young Cut-purse was hang'd out this morning But in new clothes Sir every one of us know him These things were found in his pocket Amb. Those are mine Sir Sha. I thinke he was committed on your charge Sir For a new felony Amb. Yes Sha. Hee 's gone Sir now And left us the dead body But with all Sir Such an infernall stinke and steeme behind You cannot see St. Pulchars Steeple yet They smell 't as far as Ware as the winde lies By this time sure Fit Is this upon your credit friend Sha. Sir you may see and satisfie your selfe Fit Nay then 't is time to leave off counterfeiting Sir I am not bewitch'd nor have a Divell No more then you I doe defie him I And did abuse you These two Gentlemen Put me upon it I have faith against him They taught me all my trickes I will tell truth And shame the Fiend See here Sir are my bellowes And my falle belly and my Mouse and all That should ha' come forth Man Sir are not you asham'd Now of your solemne serious vanity Pou. I will make honourable amends to truth Fit And so will I But these are Coozners still And ha' my land as plotters with my wife Who though she be not a witch is worse a whore Man Sir you belie her She is chast and vertuous and we are honest I doe know no glory A man should hope by venting his owne follies But you 'll still be an Asse in spite of providence please you goe in Sir and here truths then judge 'hem and make amends for your late rashnesse when You shall but here the paines and care was taken To save this foole from ruine his Grace of Droun'd land Fit My land is droun'd indeed Pou. Peace Man And how much is modest and too worthy wife hath suffer'd By misconstruction from him you will blush First for your owne beliefe more for his actions His land is his and never by my friend Or by my selfe meant to another use But for her succours who hath equall right If any other had worse counsells in 't I know I speake to those can apprehend me Let 'hem repent 'hem and be not detected It is not manly to take joy or pride In humane errours we doe all ill things They doe 'hem worst that love 'hem and dwell there Till the plague comes The few that have the seeds Of goodnesse left will sooner make their way To a true life by shame then punishment The END He shewes Fitz-dottrel to him comming forth He expresses a longing to see the Divell Hee lookes and survays's his feet over and over He viewes his feet againe Ingine hath won Fitz-dottrel to say on the cloake He gives him the Play-bill He turnes to Wittipol Hee shrugs himselfe up in the cloak Wittipol knocks his friend o' the brest A Niaise is a young Hawke tane crying out of the nest He disposes his wife to his place and sets his watch He repeats his contract againe Wittipol beginnes He offers to discloake him Shee stands mute He sets Mr. Manly his friend in her place And speakes for her He turnes his wife about To a waiter To another He pluckes out the 2. Bottle-ale Hee drawes out an other Raisines She sends Divell out Divell returnes He goes out She thinkes her husband watches Her husband goes out and enters presently with a cudgell upon him After a pause He strikes him againe and againe Divell goes out He whispers him of a place Hee spies Divell He gives him a paper wherein is the copy of a Song Manly sings Pug enters perceives it This Scene is acted at two windo's as out of two contiguous buildings Hee growes more familiar in his Court-ship Plaies with her paps kisseth her hands c. Her husband appeares at her back Hee speakes out of his wives window He strikes his wife The Divell speakes below Fitz-dottrel enters with his wife as come down Ingine whispers Merecraft Merecraft turnes to Fitz-dottrel Fitz-dottrel goes out Enters again Traines enters Mere-craft tells him of his faults He repines and threatens him They joynes Meere-craft pretends businesse Meere-craft describes the office of Dependancy He offers to be gone He whispers Fitz-dottrel aside And then Guilt-head He pulls Plutarchus by the lips He turns to old Guilt-head Now to Fitz-dottrel He turnes 'hem out together And Everill and he fall to share He excepts at his stature He shewes him his Pug. Gives him instructions He longs to see the play Because it is the Divell He puts him in mind of his quarrell He is angry with himselfe He thinkes how to coozen the bearer of the ring Questions his man Offers to kisse She runs in in haste he followes Pug leaps at Pitfall's comming in Traine's in his false cloak brings a false message gets the ring Mere craft followes presently and askes for it Ent. Train's as himselfe againe The Divell confesseth himselfe coozen'd Meere-craft accuseth him of negligence He asketh aide Merecraft promiseth faintly yet comforts him The Divell is doubtfull He flatters her Manly offers to be gone Meer-craft denies him She spies the Lady Either-side Meere-craft hath whisper'd with the while The Project for Tooth-picks Trains his man whispers him She lookes in her glasse Wittipol enters Wittipol is drest like a Spanish Lady Excuses him selfe for not kissing Manly begins to know him Wittipol whispers with Manly He presents Mistresse Fitz-dottrell He is jealous about his ring and Mere-craft delivers it Wittipol gives it Mistresse Fitz-dottrell Mere-craft murmures He is satisfied now he sees it He upbraids her with his Bill of costs He enters himselfe with the Ladies The Divell admires him He shews his Pug. Manly goes out with indignation They begin their Catechisme He strikes him The Divell praies Fitz-dottrel admires Wittipol The Divell praies againe He gives his wife to him taking him to be a Lady Mere-craft whispers against him Everil whispers against Mere-craft Manly conceal'd this while shews himselfe Meere-craft taks Wittipol aside moves a project for himselfe He hopes to be the man She designes Manly Everil applaudes it Fitz-dottrel is suspicious of Manly still Wittipol discovers himselfe He would have his deed again Wittipol baffles him and goes out Pitfall goes out Meere-craft seemes full of business Ambler this too with extraordinary speed He stags Ambler comes in survaies him He answers quite from the purpose For Scepticks They repair their old plot Fitz dottrel askes for his money Meaning Mere-raft The Project of forks Sledge is brought about And Guilt-head comes Fitz-dottrel disclaimes him And sends him away Mere-craft gives the instructions to him and the rest Pug is brought to New-gate Enter Iniquity the Vice The great Divell enters and upbraids him with all his daies work Iniquity takes him on his back A great noise is heard in Newgate and the Keepers come out affrighted The Iustice comes out wondring and the rest informing him He beginnes his fit The Iustice interpret all Wittipol and Manly and Mistr- Fitz-dottrel enter His wife goes to him They whisper him And give sope to act with Sir Poule interprets Figgum a Iuglers game Enter the Keeper of New-gate Fitx dottrel leaves counterfaiting The Epilogue THus the Projector here is over-throwne But I have now a Project of mine owne If it may passe that no man would invite The Poet from us to sup forth to night If the play please If it displeasant be We doe presume that no man will nor we
may perchance in taile of a Sheriffes dinner Skip with a rime o' the Table from New-nothing And take his Almaine-leape into a custard Shall make my Lad Majoresse and her sisters Laugh all their hoods over their shoulders But This is not that will doe they are other things That are receiv'd now upon earth for Vices Stranger and newer and chang'd every houre They ride 'hem like their horses off their legges And here they come to Hell whole legions of 'hem Every weeke tyr'd Wee still strive to breed And reare 'hem up new ones but they doe not stand When they come there they turne 'hem on our hands And it is fear'd they have a stud o' their owne Will put downe ours Both our breed and trade Will suddenly decay if we prevent not Unlesse it be a Vice of quality Or fashion now they take none from us Car-men Are got into the yellow starch and Chimney-sweepers To their tobacco and strong-waters Hum Meath and Obarni Wee must therefore aime At extraordinary subtile ones now When we do send to keepe us up in credit Not old Iniquities Get you e'ne back Sir To making of your rope of sand againe You are not for the manners nor the times They have their Vices there most like to Vertues You cannot know 'hem apart by any difference They weare the same clothes eate the same meate Sleepe i' the selfe-same beds ride i'those coaches Or very like foure horses in a coach As the best men and women Tissue gownes Garters and roses fourescore pound a paire Embrothered stockins cut-worke smocks and shirts More certaine marks of lechery now and pride Then ere they were of true nobility But Pug since you doe burne with such desire To doe the Common-wealth of Hell some service I am content assuming of a body You goe to earth and visit men a day But you must take a body ready made Pug I can create you none nor shall you forme Your selfe an aery one but become subject To all impression of the flesh you take So farre as humane frailty So this morning There is a handsome Cutpurse hang'd at Tiborne Whose spirit departed you may enter his body For clothes imploy your credit with the Hangman Or let our tribe of Brokers furnish you 〈◊〉 looke how farre your subtilty can worke Though those organs with that body spie Amongst mankind you cannot there want vices And therefore the lesse need to carry 'hem wi' you But as you make your soone at nights relation And we shall find it merits from the State You shall have both trust from us and imploiment Pug. Most gracious Chiefe Div. Onely thus more I bind you To serve the first man that you meete and him I 'll shew you now Observe him Yon' is he You shall see first after your clothing Follow him But once engag'd there you must stay and fix Not shift untill the midnights cocke doe crow Pug. Any conditions to be gone Div. Away then Act. I. Scene II. Fitz-dottrell I they doe now name Bretnor as before They talk'd of Gresham and of Doctor Fore-man Franklin and Fiske and Savory he was in too But ther 's not one of these that ever could Yet shew a man the Divell in true sort They have their christalls I doe know and rings And virgin parchment and their dead-mens sculls Their ravens wings their lights and pentacles With characters I ha' seene all these But Would I might see the Divell I would give A hundred o'these picture to see him Once out of picture May I prove a cuckold And that 's the one maine mortall thing I feare If I beginne not now to thinke the Painters Have only made him 'Slight he would be seene One time or other else He would not let An ancient gentleman of a good house As most are now in England the Fitz-dottrel's Runne wild and call upon him thus in vaine As I ha' done this twelue mone'th If he be not At all why are there Conjurers If they be not Why are there lawes against 'hem The best artists Of Cambridge Oxford Middlesex and London Essex and Kent I have had in pay to raise him These fifty weekes and yet h' appeares not 'Sdeath I shall suspect they can make circle onely Shortly and know but his hard names They doe say H 'will meet a man of himselfe that has a mind to him If he would so I have a minde and a halfe for him He should not be long absent Pray thee come I long for thee An' I were with child by him And my wife too I could not more Come yet Good Beelezebub Were he a kind divell And had humanity in him he would come but To save ones longing I should use him well I sweare and with respect would he would try me Not as the Conjurers doe when they ha' rais'd him Get him in bonds and send him post on errands A thousand miles it is preposterous that And I beleeve is the true cause he comes not And he has reason Who would be engag'd That might live freely as he may doe I sweare They are wrong all The burn't child dreads the fire They doe not know to entertaine the Divell I would so welcome him obserue his diet Get him his chamber hung with arras two of 'hem I' my owne house lend him my wives wrought pillowes And as I am an honest man I thinke If he had a minde to her too I should grant him To make our friend-ship perfect So I would not To every man If he but heare me now And should come to me in a brave yong shape And take me at my word ha Who is this Act. I. Scene III Pug. Fitz-dottrell SIr your good pardon that I thus presume Upon your privacy I am borne a Gentleman A younger brother but in some disgrace Now with my friends and want some little meanes To keepe me upright while things be reconcil'd Please you to let my service be of use to you Sir Fit Service 'fore hell my heart was at my mouth Till I had view'd his shooes well for those roses Were bigge inough to hide a cloven foot No friend my number 's full I have one servant Who is my all indeed and from the broome Unto the brush for just so farre I trust him He is my Ward-robe man my Cater Cooke Butler and Steward lookes unto my horse And helpes to watch my wife H' has all the places That I can thinke on from the garret downward E'en to the manger and the curry-combe Pug. Sir I shall put your worship to no charge More then my meate and that but very little I 'll serve you for your love Fit Ha without wages I 'le harken o'th at eare were I at leasure But now I 'm busie 'Pry'the friend forbeare mee And' thou hadst beene a Divell I should say Somewhat more to thee Thou dost hinder now My meditations Pug. Sir I am a Divell Fit How Pug. A true Divell Sir Fit Nay now you ly
that projects Waies to enrich men or to make 'hem great But suites by marriages by undertaking According as he sees they humour it Fit Can he not conjure at all Ing. I thinke he can Sir To tell you true but you doe know of late The State hath tane such note of 'hem and compell'd 'hem To enter such great bonds they dare not practice Fit 'T is true and I lie fallow for 't the while Ing. O Sir you 'll grow the richer for the rest Fit I hope I shall but Ingine you do talke Somewhat too much o' my courses My Cloake-customer Could tell me strange particulars Ing. By my meanes Fit How should he have 'hem else Ing. You doe not know Sir What he has and by what arts A monied man Sir And is as great with your Almanack-Men as you are Fit That Gallant Ing. You make the other waite too long here And he is extreme punctuall Fit Is he a gallant Ing. Sir you shall see He 'is in his riding suit As he comes now from Court But heere him speake Minister matter to him and then tell me Act. II. Scene I. Meer-craft Fitz-dottrell Ingine Traines Pug. SIr money 's a whore a bawd a drudge Fit to runne out on errands Let her goe Via pecunia when she 's runne and gone And fled and dead then will I fetch her againe With Aqua-vitae out of an old Hogs-head While there are lees of wine or dregs of beere I 'll never want her Coine her out of cobwebs Dust but I 'll have her Raise wooll upon egge-shells Sir and make grasse grow out o'marro-bones To make her come Commend me to your Mistresse Say let the thousand pound but be had ready And it is done I would but see the creature Of flesh and blood the man the Prince indeed That could imploy so many millions As I would helpe him to Fit How talks he millions Mer. I 'll give you an account of this to morrow Yes I will take no lesse and doe it too If they were Myriades and without the Divell By direct meanes it shall be good in law Ing. Sir Mer. Tell Mr. Wood-cock I 'll not faile to meet him Upon th' Exchange at night Pray him to have The writings there and wee 'll dispatch it Sir You are a Gentleman of a good presence A handsome man I have considered you As a fit stocke to graft honours upon I have a Project to make you a Duke now That you must be one within so many moneths And I set down out of true reason of state You sha' not avoid it But you must harken then Ing. Harken why Sir doe you doubt his eares Alas You doe not know Master Fitz-dottrel Fit He do's not know me indeed I thank you Ingine For rectifying him Mer. Good Why Ingine then I 'll tell you I see you ha' credit here And that you can keepe counsell I 'll not question He shall but be an undertaker with me In a most feasible bus'nesse It shall cost him Nothing Ing. Good Sir Mer. Except he please but 's count'nance That I will have t' appeare in 't to great men For which I 'll make him one He shall not draw A string of 's purse I 'll drive his pattent for him We 'll take in Cit'zens Commoners and Aldermen To beare the charge and blow 'hem off againe Like so many dead flies when 't is carried The thing is for recovery of drown'd Land Whereof the Crown 's to have a moiety If it be owner Else the Crowne and Owners To share that moiety and the recoverers T' enjoy the tother moiety for their charge Ing. Throughout England Mer. Yes which will arise To eighteene millions seven the first yeere I have computed all and made my survay Unto an acre I 'll beginne at the Pan Not at the skirts as some ha' done and lost All that they wrought their timber-worke their trench Their bankes all borne away or else fill'd up By the next winter Tut they never went The way I 'll have it all Ing. A Gallant tract Of land it is Mer. 'T will yeeld a pound an acre We must let cheape ever at first But Sir This lookes too large for you I see Come hither We 'll have a lesse Here 's a plaine fellow you see him Has his black bag of papers there in Buckram Wi'not be sould for th' Earldome of Pancridge Draw Gi' me out one by chance Project foure dogs skins Twelve thousand pound the very worst at first Fit Pray you let 's see 't Sir Mer. 'T is a toy a trifle Fit Trifle 12. thousand pound for dogs-skins Mer. Yes But by way of dressing you must know Sir And med'cining the leather to a height Of improv'd ware like your Borachio Of Spaine Sir I can fetch nine thousand for 't Ing. Of the Kings glover Mer. Yes how heard you that Ing. Sir I doe know you can Mer. Within this houre And reserve halfe my secret Pluck another See if thou hast a happier hand I thought so The very next worse to it Bottle-ale Yet this is two and twenty thousand Pr'y thee Pull out another two or three Fit Good stay friend By bottle-ale two and twenty thousand pound Mer. Yes Sir it 's cast to penny-hal'penny-farthing O' the back-side there you may see it read I will not bate a Harrington o' the summe I 'll winne it i' my water and my malt My furnaces and hanging o' my coppers The tonning and subtilty o' my yest And then the earth of my bottles which I dig Turne up and steepe and worke and neale my selfe To a degree of Proc'lane You will wonder At my proportions what I will put up In seven yeeres for so long time I aske For my invention I will save in corke In my mere stop'ling 'bove three thousand pound Within that terme by googing of 'hem out Just to the size of my bottles and not flieing There 's infinite losse i'th at What hast thou there O'making wine of raisins this is in hand now Ing. Is not that strange Sir to make wine of raisins Mer. Yes and as true wine as th' wines of France Or Spaine or Italy Looke of what grape My raisin is that wine I 'll render perfect As of the muscatell grape I 'll render muscatell Of Canary his the Claret his So of all kinds and bate you of the prices Of wine throughout the kingdome halfe in halfe Ing. But how Sir if you raise the other commodity Raisins Mer. Why then I 'll make it out of black-berries And it shall doe the same 'T is but more art And the charge lesse Take out another Fit No good Sir Save you the trouble I 'll not looke nor heare Of any but your first there the Drown'd-land If 't will doe as you say Mer. Sir there 's not place To gi' you demonstration of these things They are a little to subtle But I could shew you Such a necessity in 't as you must be But
title thence Sir Duke of the Drown'd-lands Or Drown'd-land Fit Ha that last has a good sound I like it well The Duke of Dround-'land Ing. Yes It goes like Green-land Sir if you marke it Mer. I And drawing thus your honour from the worke You make the reputation of that greater And stay 't the longer i' your name Fit 'T is true Droun'd-lands will live in Droun'd-land Mer. Yes when you Ha' no foote left as that must bee Sir one day And though it tarry in your heyres some forty Fifty descents the longer liver at last yet Must thrust 'hem out on 't if no quirk in law Or odde Vice o'ther owne not do 't first We see those changes daily the faire lands That were the Clyents are the Lawyers now And those rich Mannors there of good man Tailors Had once more wood upon 'hem then the yard By which th'were measur'd out for the last purchase Nature hath these vicissitudes Shee makes No man a state of perpetuity Sir Fit Yo' are i' the right Let 's in then and conclude I my sight againe I 'll talke with you anon Act. II. Scene V. Pug. SUre he will geld me if I stay or worse Pluck out my tongue one o' the two This Foole There is no trusting of him and to quit him Were a contempt against my Chiefe past pardon It was a shrewd disheartning this at first Who would ha' thought a woman so well harness'd Or rather well-caparison'd indeed That weares such petticoates and lace to her smoks Broad seaming laces as I see 'hem hang there And garters which are lost if she can shew 'hem Could ha' done this Hell why is shee so brave It cannot be to please Duke Dottrel sure Nor the dull pictures in her gallery Nor her owne deare reflection in her glasse Yet that may be I have knowne many of 'hem Beginne their pleasure but none end it there That I consider as I goe a long with it They may for want of better company Or that they thinke the better spend an houre Two three or foure discoursing with their shaddow But sure they have a farther speculation No woman drest with so much care and study Doth dresse her selfe in vaine I 'll vexe this probleme A little more before I leave it sure Act. II. Scene VI. Wittipol Manly Mistresse Fitz-dottrell Pug. THis was a fortune happy aboue thought That this should prove thy chamber which I fear'd Would be my greatest trouble this must be The very window and that the roome Man It is I now remember I have often seen there A woman but I never mark'd her much Wit Where was your soule friend Man Faith but now and then Awake unto those objects Wit You pretend so Let me not live if I am not in love More with her wit for this direction now Then with her forme though I ha' prais'd that prettily Since I saw her and you to day Read those They 'll goe unto the aire you love so well Try 'hem unto the note may be the musique Will call her sooner light shee 's here Sing quickly Mis. Fit Either he understood him not or else The fellow was not faithfull in delivery Of what I bad And I am justly pay'd That might have made my profit of his service But by mis-taking have drawne on his envy And done the worse defeate upon my selfe How Musique then he may be there and is sure Pug. O! Is it so Is there the enter-view Have I drawne to you at last my cunning Lady The Divell is an Asse fool'd off and beaten Nay made an instrument and could not sent it Well since yo'have showne the malice of a woman No lesse then her true wit and learning Mistresse I 'll try if little Pug have the malignity To recompence it and so save his danger 'T is not the paine but the discredite of it The Divell should not keepe a body intire Wit Away fall backe shee comes Man I 'll leave you Sir The Master of my chamber I have businesse Wit Mis. Mis. Fit You make me paint Sir Wit The' are faire colours Lady and naturall I did receive Some commands from you lately gentle Lady But so perplex'd and wrap'd in the delivery As I may feare t' have mis-interpreted But must make sute still to be neere your grace Mis. Fit Who is there with you Sir Wit None but my selfe It falls out Lady to be a deare friends lodging Wherein there 's some conspiracy of fortune With your poore servants blest affections Mis. Fit Who was it sung Wi. He Lady but he 's gone Upon my intreaty of him seeing you Approach the window Neither need you doubt him If he were here He is too much a gentleman Mis. Fit Sir if you judge me by this simple action And by the outward habite and complexion Of easinesse it hath to your designe You may with Justice say I am a woman And a strange woman But when you shall please To bring but that concurrence of my fortune To memory which to day your selfe did urge It may beget some favor like excuse Though none like reason Wit No my tune-full Mistresse Then surely Love hath none nor Beauty any Nor Nature violenced in both these With all whose gentle tongues you speake at once I thought I had inough remov'd already That scruple from your brest and left yo'all reason When through my mornings perspective I shewd you A man so above excuse as he is the cause Why any thing is to be done upon him And nothing call'd an injury mis-plac'd I rather now had hope to shew you how Love By his accesses growes more naturall And what was done this morning with such force Was but devis'd to serve the present then That since love hath the honour to approach These sister-swelling brests and touch this soft And rosie hand he hath the skill to draw Their Nectar forth with kissing and could make More wanton salts from this brave promontory Downe to this valley then the nimble Roe Could play the hopping Sparrow 'bout these nets And sporting Squirell in these crisped groves Bury himselfe in every Silke-wormes kell Is here unravel'd runne into the snare Which every haire is is cast into a curle To catch a Cupid flying Bath himselfe In milke and roses here and dry him there Warme his cold hands to play with this smooth round And well torn'd chin as with the Billyard ball Rowle on these lips the banks of love and there At once both plant and gather kisses Lady Shall I with what I have made to day here call All sense to wonder and all faith to signe The misteries revealed in your forme And will Love pardon me the blasphemy I utter'd when I said a glasse could speake This beauty or that fooles had power to judge it Doe but looke on her eies They doe light All that Love's world comprizeth Doe but looke on her haire it is bright As Love's starre when it riseth Doe but marke her
to crosse it for 't will be A mighty saver of Linnen through the Kingdome As that is one o' my grounds and so spare washing Now on you two had I laid all the profits Guilt-head to have the making of all those Of gould and silver for the better personages And you of those of Steele for the common sort And both by Pattent I had brought you your seales in But now you have prevented me and I thanke you Sle. Sir I will baile you at my owne ap-perill Mer. Nay choose Plu. Do you so too good Father Gui. I like the fashin o' the project well The forkes It may be a lucky one and is not Intricate as one would say but fit for Plaine heads as ours to deale in Do you heare Officers we discharge you Mer. Why this shewes A little good nature in you I confesse But doe not tempt your friends thus Little Guilt-head Advise your fire great Guilt-head from these courses And here to trouble a great man in reversion For a matter o'fifty on a false Alarme Away it shewes not well Let him get the pieces And bring 'hem Yo 'll heare more else Plu. Father Act. V. Scene V. Ambler To them O Master Sledge are you here I ha' been to seeke you You are the Constable they say Here 's one That I do charge with Felony for the suite He weares Sir Mer. Who M. Fitz-dottrels man Ware what you do M. Ambler Amb. Sir these clothes I 'll sweare are mine and the shooes the gentlewomans I told you of and ha 'him afore a Iustice I will Pug. My master Sir will passe his word for me Amb. O can you speake to purpose now Fit Not I If you be such a one Sir I will leave you To your God-fathers in Law Let twelve men worke Pug. Do you heare Sir pray in private Fit Well what say you Briefe for I have no time to loose Pug. Truth is Sir I am the very Divell and had leave To take this body I am in to serve you Which was a Cutpurses and hang'd this Morning And it is likewise true I stole this suite To cloth me with But Sir let me not goe To prison for it I have hitherto Lost time done nothing showne indeed no part O' my Divels nature Now I will so helpe Your malice 'gainst these parties so advance The businesse that you have in hand of witchcraft And your possession as my selfe were in you Teach you such tricks to make your belly swell And your eyes turne to foame to stare to gnash Your teeth together and to beat your selfe Laugh loud and faine six voices Fit Out you Rogue You most infernall counterfeit wretch Avant Do you thinke to gull me with your AEsops Fables Here take him to you I ha' no part in him Pug. Sir Fit Away I do disclaime I will not heare you Mer. What said he to you Sir Fit Like a lying raskall Told me he was the Divell Mer. How a good jest Fit And that he would teach me such fine divels tricks For our new resolution Eve O'pox on him 'T was excellent wisely done Sir not to trust him Mer. Why if he were the Divell we sha'not need him If you 'll be rul'd Goe throw your selfe on a bed Sir And faine you ill Wee 'll not be seen wi' you Till after that you have a fit and all Confirm'd within Keepe you with the two Ladies And perswade them I 'll to Iustice Either-side And possesse him with all Traines shall seeke out Ingine And they to fill the towne with 't every cable It is to be veer'd We must imploy out all Our emissaries now Sir I will send you Bladders and Bellowes Sir be confident 'T is no hard thing t' outdoe the Divell in A Boy o'thirteen yeere old made him an Asse But t'toher day Fit Well I 'll beginne to practice And scape the imputation of being Cuckold By mine owne act Mer. Yo' are right Eve Come you ha' put Your selfe to a simple coile here and your freinds By dealing with new Agents in new plots Mer. No more o'th at sweet cousin Eve What had you To doe with this same Wittipol for a Lady Mer. Question not that 't is done Eve You had some straine 'Bove E-la Mer. I had indeed Eve And now you crack for t Mer. Do not upbraid me Eve Come you must be told on 't You are so covetous still to imbrace More then you can that you loose all Mer. 'T is right What would you more then Guilty Now your succours Act. V. Scene VI. Shakles Pug. Iniquity Divell HEre you are lodg'd Sir you must send your garnish If you 'll be privat Pug. There it is Sir leave me To New-Gate brought How is the name of Divell Discredited in me What a lost fiend Shall I be on returne My Chiefe will roare In triumph now that I have beene on earth A day and done no noted thing but brought That body back here was hang'd out this morning Well! would it once were midnight that I knew My utmost I thinke Time be drunke and sleepes He is so still and moves not I do glory Now i' my torment Neither can I expect it I have it with my fact Ini. Child of hell be thou merry Put a looke on as round boy and red as a cherry Cast care at thy posternes and firke in thy fetters They are ornaments Baby have graced thy betters Looke upon me and hearken Our Chiefe doth salute thee And least the could yron should chance to confuse thee H' hath sent thee grant-paroll by me to stay longer A moneth here on earth against cold Child or honger Pug. How longer here a moneth Ini. Yes boy till the Session That so thou maiest have a triumphall egression Pug. In a cart to be hang'd Ini. No Child in a Carte The charriot of Triumph which most of them are And in the meane time to be greazy and bouzy And nasty and filthy and ragged and louzy With dam'n me renounce me and all the fine phrases That bring unto Tiborne the plentifull gazes Pug. He is a Divell and may be our Chiefe The great superior Divell for his malice Arch-divel I acknowledge him He knew What I would suffer when he tie'd me up thus In a rogues body and he has I thanke him His tirannous pleasure on me to confine me To the unlucky carcasse of a Cutpurse Wherin I could do nothing Div. Impudent fiend Stop thy lewd mouth Doest thou not shame and tremble To lay thine owne dull damn'd defects upon An innocent case there Why thou heavy slave The spirit that did possesse that flesh before Put more true life in a finger and a thumbe Then thou in the whole Masse Yet thou rebell'st And murmurst What one proffer hast thou made Wicked inough this day that might be call'd Worthy thine owne much lesse the name that sent thee First thou did'st helpe thy selfe into a beating Promptly and with